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sarucane · 6 months

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OFMD Spiral Narrative Analysis 40: Izzy Being Wrong Part 1

Intro: What I love most about how season 2 builds on season 1 of OFMD is the spiral narrative structure. Ground is repeatedly and explicitly re-trod from season 1 to season 2, but in season 2 everything goes deeper than season 1. Meanings are shuffled, emotions are stronger and truer, and transformation is showcased above everything. The first season plucks certain notes, then the second season plucks the same ones--but louder, and then it weaves them together to create a symphony.

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Most of these posts are about scenes in OFMD that repeat certain element from season 1 to season 2, but this little series is going to be looking more closely at Izzy and how his character arc spirals to its conclusion.

This was inspired by my noticing in a rewatch that in season 1, Izzy is like always wrong. Always. Almost every scene he's in, he's wrong. And the interesting thing here is that Izzy actually doesn't know about this. When he says something, he seems to believe it. He isn't lying. He's just wrong. Here's how:

He makes a statement that is factually incorrect or proved wrong by later events within the same episode

2. He demonstrates a profoundly inaccurate understanding, which is later contradicted by his own character development and/or by the show's overall narrative itself.

So, shall we begin?

Episode 1: Shout-out to Izzy's first scene, where he does actually manage to (mostly) accurately read a situation: Stede and company are, indeed, idiots.

That said, this does still juuust barely fall under category 2, because this assessment of Stede is later complicated by this scene

In the first season, Izzy hangs on to his idea of Stede as moron long past where it's useful. In the second, he gets that Stede isn't actually an idiot, he just has 0 skills, and he hilariously marvels at how this somehow doesn't translate into death.

Then there's this Category 1 scene, where Buttons says he thought the island was deserted and Izzy says this. Izzy's clearly suggesting that he and the boys are the only ones here, but there's a whole village of indigenous people living this island.

Nope. Category 1

Is Ed half insane though? Or is he just weird? And trapped? Putting that in category 2.

Episode 2:

He was. Category 1 and 2.

You're a pirate, Izzy. Don't make excuses. Category 1.

The future of Izzy, Ed, and this crew will not follow this narrative. Category 2.

When Izzy meets Stede at Jackie's, he does actually manage to avoid both categories. That said, he also manages to not actually tell Stede who he's working for, so still got a definite thread of untruth there.

Category 1 here: no you didn't, Izzy. You just thought you did. A misunderstanding on Izzy's part that actually rebounds on him: if Stede has met Ed after being brought to Ed's freaky room, on Ed's ship, and hearing god-knows-what from Izzy before he went in for the meeting...seems likely that things would have turned out very differently.

Episode 3

Yes but also no, Izzy. And worth noting that despite the embarrassing performance here, the ship actually is repaired a few hours later, so they managed in the end.

These both fall firmly into category 2. Izzy's going to die for these people he's calling useless and planning to murder.

Ed has a plan, and has the whole time. Category 1.

They're eating right now, Izzy, so clearly they do get food when they've been invaded.

No they don't, they live at Ed's pleasure, and Izzy's very clearly the only one who wants to kill them. Ivan whacks Pete a few times (I think Ivan might remember him...), but in this scene Fang and Ivan are just chilling in the background the entire time. The situation's already gotten well away from Izzy, even though he clearly doesn't understand that: category 2.

Category 2. Izzy refers to the "years" he's spent with Ed one more time, in season 2.

The second scene casts the first scene in rather a different light. How much of Ed's erratic behavior was actual mania, and how much of it was him acting out to try to escape a situation he felt trapped in? A situation whose continuation Izzy worked for years to maintain. When we first meet him with Izzy, Ed's sitting alone in a dark room. How long had Izzy been the only intermediary between Ed and the world?

Izzy in the first scene is describing his woes as a middle manager, making sure Ed could stay Blackbeard. But doing that was closing off avenues of possible escape for Ed. Izzy in the second scene is acknowledging that this was...just not an okay thing to do. And that it was about him, not Ed.

Nope.

#ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd #ofmd s2 #our flag means death #ofmd spoilers #ofmd meta #izzy hands #stede bonnet #ed teach #I finally figured out how to add a keep reading link!

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 5 days

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Got this comment on one of my posts, went to reply, found that I had more to say than I could fit into a comment, so I'm replying with a new post instead. Hope you don't mind, @properverse.

I might be wrong, but I think the Jimmy Carr situation has changed even in the few years since I've started following this stuff. When I first watched 8 Out of 10 Cats/Catsdown/Big Fat Quizzes in 2020, here's what I think the situation was: Jimmy Carr writes horrifyingly offensive one-liners and smashes them all together in stand-up shows, he also does a lot of autocue-reading TV hosting, it's a pretty soulless comedy career but he's a professional at what he does, seems to do it well (if you assume that "it" is tell a bunch of one-liners where the punchline is the fact that it's offensive, and look like a robot in robotic TV jobs), it's certainly worked for him, it's made him very rich. He's friends with a lot of other comedians, who all say he views comedy as a job that has nothing to do with his real personality, and in real life he's a very nice guy. That does track with how he comes across - a soulless comedy robot just punching the clock, not putting any of himself into his work, so I guess it's totally possible that he's very different when not on the job.

I made a lot of posts in the early days of this blog that talked about Jimmy Carr. When I think about my early posts on this blog, I have a better understanding of why comedians don't love having bootlegs of themselves out there; I love getting to hear what a comedian I like said in 2008 or whatever, but I also cringe at the thought that people can read some shit I wrote in 2020. I frequently cringe at the thought of stuff I wrote last week.

Anyway, I was very very into Catsdown in particular in those days (I still think it was a great show in its heyday, I just think that day was long over even before Sean Lock died and it should be done now), so Jimmy Carr cropped up in a lot of my posts. I didn't like him, but I did sort of respect some things about his weirdly cold professional approach to the job, and every once in a while I'd write some screed that would try to reconcile all the contradictions about him. And speculate on whether the laugh is real. I still think it might be, he might have just covered it up better earlier in his career. Most likely option seems to be that it started as an affectation and became real. I did mention, in some old post or other, that Jimmy Carr draws very clear dividing lines between his professional persona and his real life, he's never "himself" on stage or on screen. Which means the only thing we know for sure that Jimmy Carr did as a real person, as himself and not as the character at all, is avoid tax.

This seemed like a reasonable thing to discuss speculate about and consider complicated at the time, he was an example in what I think are some reasonable debates about how much offensive stuff it might be acceptable to say in the name of comedy (though he wasn't a great example because he isn't actually funny). I did find it interesting that all the other comedians seemed to like him so much.

That's where I think things were a few years ago, when I started this blog. But I don't think that's the case anymore. At some point in the last couple of years, he's gone from that, to someone where I will easily just say "that guy can fuck right off and so can anyone who thinks he's cool". It doesn't seem so complicated now.

I think the turning point was when that Holocaust joke he made got all over the tabloids and stuff. Which I did think was a bit ridiculous, tabloids reporting that Jimmy Carr told a racist joke. I'm not defending the joke at all, it was awful and racist. But it was about the same as all his other jokes, it was weird to single that one out. If you don't like racism, don't go to a Jimmy Carr gig. Ideally, no one would like racism and Jimmy Carr wouldn't have a career. But I guess there's always a market for it.

After that whole storm, Jimmy Carr doubled down hard, and since then he's become much more classically right-wing. Going on Joe Rogan and Jordan Peterson's podcasts. He's appeared on a few right-wing panels and stuff. Railing against cancel culture and the woke PC mob in interviews, in "real life", when appearing as himself, sharing real views rather than just doing comedy. Pivoting in his stand-up from all the years spent just saying awful things, to saying awful things prefaced by "of course this will get me canceled by the wokes".

Basically, I feel like he's proven all the initial easy assumptions right. In earlier years, he made us think, okay, maybe it's possible that there is a weird contradiction where a really nice guy in real life can just say awful things because it's a job, just like any other person who might do things they don't believe in for the sake of their job, then he clocks off and he's a good person offstage. I thought the possibility of that contradiction was mildly interesting. But since 2022, he's pretty much said, "Nope, everything you'd assume about me from my comedy is correct, I'm just another right-wing stereotype in real life."

And I haven't heard quite as many other comedians talk about what a great guy he is within the last couple of years. Nish Kumar has a story in his latest stand-up show about getting in a fight with Jimmy Carr about this, getting angry at him for going on Jordan Peterson's podcast. That took place at Just For Laughs in 2022 (where I actually saw Nish Kumar live, and he did shout the words "Fuck you, Jimmy Carr!" during his set, and those words were not in that same show when I saw it a few months earlier in New York City, I didn't know until he started doing his current show that those words got added because he'd just had a fight with Jimmy Carr during the festival). They story makes it sound like he and Jimmy Carr were cool before that. Just a few months earlier he was hanging out with Jimmy Carr on Katherine Ryan's couch in her Backstage show. So clearly, at least in one comedian's mind, things were changing with him.

Since then, the only comedians I've heard talk about how great Jimmy Carr is are comedians where their veneration of him may be less "He doesn't really believe those shitty things", and more "I agree with the shitty things he believes" (Russell Howard, Katherine Ryan). And Sam Campbell. I'm hoping being a fan of Jimmy Carr is an anomaly in Sam Campbell's beliefs. That's a weird one that I can't explain. He's not even funny, Sam. What are you doing?

Anyway, that's what I think about Jimmy Carr. Not sure the whole "He's a great guy in real life!" holds up anymore. I also think I might have read at some point that he's said he won't do Taskmaster, I hope that's true. Though even if he's open to it, I think at this point he might be getting to be too controversial a figure for Taskmaster. Presumably the Taskmaster casting people know they'd alienate their audience if they brought in one of those "I hate the wokes" comedians, and Jimmy Carr has pretty well thrown his lot in with them.

All right, that is the last screed I write about Jimmy fucking Carr. I'm done with it now, I promise.

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quadrantbot · 10 months

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Jake and Dirkjake and other mildly related tangents. (Additional paragraph on alpha kid romance, because I guess that was necessary to me.)

Heads up this post is not positive about Dirkjake like, at all. I'm not saying you can't like it or do anything with it, I am just sharing my own personal opinion and analysis on it. And Jake in general. (I'm not going to tag with Dirkjake because that's a dick move, but I'm not going to intentionally avoid saying it in NON tag text either. Scroll on if you don't like Dirkjake hate. Okay? Cool.)

Jake is one of those characters that fandom wise, is super mischaracterized. This includes the mischaracterizations in postcanon as well, which also at least to some degree includes Pesterquest. It's confusing to me for several reasons why so many major changes were made to Jake outside of the main comic, but considering how most of the fans do not seem to take him seriously and the writing team for the dubiously canon content seem to lump his existence purely in with Dirk, it's a little understandable.

Jake isn't really too complicated of a character when it comes to likes, dislikes, motivations and issues. Jake likes his movies, the IDEA of adventure, and he loves blue ladies. He doesn't really care for romance at any major point in the story, especially considering his entire friend group had feelings for him, and when it comes down to actual adventures, actual conflict, he's freaked out. Jake has a great deal of care for his friends, even despite the weird romance shit occuring in the group, and his main issue when it comes to that friend group is a lack of communication from everyone involved. Jake "wants" to be important, Jake "wants" to be a hero, Jake "wants" to be a brave adventurer, but these "wants" don't ever appear to reflect in his actions, even so far as contradicting them, leading to conflict between his supposed wants, and what he actually seems to go for. Jake is often seen as a "himbo" by the fandom, but even that is not really all that accurate. Jake isn't stupid. Jake does have some issues when it comes to reading the room, but even when he DOESN'T, it's usually picked up whenever he's in a weird situation that he doesn't want to be in, which can be seen in his conversation with Jane about her romantic feelings for him, or the proposed lack thereof. Should be pages 4587-4593, but I'll screenshot the notable parts I'll be referencing and put them below.

Jake didn't really seem very convinced when Jane said she DIDN'T have feelings for him, but he just continued along with the conversation, expressing his relief because even if she was lying, he didn't really want to face that sort of thing head on. Jake then goes onto explain the weird shit with Dirk and doesn't exactly seem very interested in him either, but seeing as Jane supposedly has no interest in him, there's a weird sort of obligation going on where he feels he HAS to just let this happen, which doesn't really seem like the common fandom idea that he was like, head over heels for Dirk. There's a vague mention of jokes from "years ago" where they could like each other if Dirk was a girl, but seeing as these are 15 year olds, "years ago" is a pretty vague period of time AND teenagers will say shit like that all of the time! Mostly younger ones, yes, but I think a good portion of teenagers have joked about having feelings for/WOULD have feelings for someone if they were a gal or a guy. Nothing when it came to Jake's behavior was intentionaly shitty or leading Dirk on or anything, because Jake can't always be aware of literally everyone's feelings for him?

On a vaguely related tangent, I used to be large on the "bi Jake" being canon thing, but just taking the bare minimum look into some of this just makes it seem like he's got no interest in men at all, and his interest in women appears to be from both a jealousy/almost gender envy standpoint (in the way he seems to WANT to be like them,) and a genuine attraction, especially when considering his blue ladies and more specifically, Aranea. (I do not like Aranea/Jake for the record, and if somehow you guys who enjoy that pairing (or any pairing with alpha trolls/anyone who isn't an alphatroll, I'm looking at you Meenkat, Vrismeen and other freaks,) have made it this far, PROSHITS GET OUT!! I am a normal consumer of darkfic not a FREAK!!) I think I can understand those who read Jake as not aromantic, just uninterested in romance with his current issues, but I also thoroughly enjoy reading Jake as arospec as someone who is both arospec AND someone with several arospec friends who like the reading just as much, Jake never seems to take a genuine interest in relationships with anyone, only considering one with Jane or Dirk because they're his friends, and if he's good friends with them, they MUST be good partner options for him. While it's true there can be a good basis on friendship, I don't think the two major Jake ""romance options"" are all that fit even with the basis of friendship, seeing as neither Jane nor Dirk communicate well, and Jake really doesn't either.

The thing about the base alpha kids (excluding cherubs and any of Dirk's robots, whic includes Lil Hal, despite being a copy of his brain,) is that when it comes to the most prominent "proposed" canon pairings, Dirkjake, Janejake, Dirkroxy, it just seems they only exist because those four are each others only options romantically. Jane likes Jake, so Roxy feels like Dirk is the only option. Dirk, though unlabelled, only has a canon interest in men, so Jake appears to be the only option. Jane seems to like Jake to a degree, but I think that primarily stems from the fact that Jake is extremely kind and caring to all his friends, so she really does see him as HER only option as well. Again, I do think some of the base alpha kids pairings are alright, but that mostly relies on things AFTER the trickster mode section completely explodes all over everyone and the conflicts reach a boiling point. Dirk and Jane make up, and I do think there's something good that could be said about some form of moiraillegiance between the two, because even despite their issues with each other prior to the Dirkjake breakup, they still do care about each other. I also like Jakeroxy as a pairing option, though mostly in a queerplatonic sense, because when Roxy took a step back from any form of romantic interest in Jake because of Jane and later Dirk, Roxy is more capable of having some form of bond with Jake that wouldn't automatically feel like a necessarily romantic thing, and I think their shared caring for their friends and each other could make them closer. The thing about the base proposed pairings between the alpha kids is that, at least in the case of Dirkjake, it's overglorified by the fandom, even if there are ""nuanced"" readings of them.

This isn't to say that you can't interpret the text however you want, but when it comes to the bare minimum in canon Dirkjake doesn't really work at all. Not as a fluffy pairing, and not as a strange, codependent teenage relationship where they're mutually obsessed with each other and tearing each other apart. Jake has no romantic interest in Dirk. Jake also has a completely reasonable extra reason why, even if he DID have feelings for Dirk, which, according to canon, he doesn't really, they still wouldn't be good together. I definitely understand the value in exploring negative relationships via fictional means, but when it comes to Dirkjake, their conflict isn't complicated, or nuanced, or even really that complex to understand. Dirk didn't know how to properly go through with his feelings for Jake, so he did fucked up shit, and Lil Hal did fucked up shit, and it very easily came crashing down on him. Even without every strange and fucked up thing Dirk and Lil Hal did towards Jake in order to express those feelings, the biggest point of conflict, the decapitated head kiss in front of the volcano, was definitely enough to state that there's nothing really all that great between them, and there's nothing to take from it that really requires or calls for an exploration of the fucked up side of their relationship, because every way I've seen that handled, it's just as full of mischaracterization as fluffy Dirkjake is. I can understand the excitement at "canon gay representation," but at the end of the day, all Dirkjake really is is a one sided relationship between Dirk and a guy who doesn't have any feelings for him outside of platonic ones, a guy who felt an obligation to be with Dirk just because Dirk was his friend. Could that be explored in an interesting and angsty way? Definitely, but that is a Dirkjake interpretation I've seen the least of, if any at all, and that's literally what's set up canonically!

"But Ro, what about postcanon?" There's a lot to be said about postcanon, and a variety of things that make any form of romantic feelings on Jake's end completely unbelievable to me. For starters, Ult Dirk is in control of postcanon, Alt Calliope is also, to some degree, but anything that may or may not ""confirm"" romantic feelings on Jake's end is being told to us by two unreliable narrators. But also, postcanon is stupid, existed to get Hussie out of debt, and overall was a piece of garbage that didn't do anything for canon whatsoever. So I don't consider it canon. At all. But if you do, the unreliable narrator argument above is for you.

#jake english #homestuck #homestuck analysis #alpha kids #dirk strider #roxy lalonde #jane crocker #Jake english analysis #hs analysis #hs character analysis #Homestuck character analysis #Ro's Character Analysis Tag

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marzipanandminutiae · 1 year

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I watched Crimson Peak recently and saw another post here asking you about it, so since I'm new to this, I'm also going to do the same if thats ok.

I had almost no clue about what i was going to watch, except for the fact that Thomas (aka Tom Hiddleston) is in a relationship with his weird sister, so that didn't really come as a surprise. The way the movie escalated had so many contradictions, Edith's pureness versus the sickening situation that grew in Thomas' family. It bothered me a whole evening how I couldn't make out a satisfying explanation or message this movie wanted to express. I mean other than discovering the truth behind the mystery and empathising with Tom Hiddleston's character. Was that really it? A horror movie having fun with how much a human's boundaries can be stretched? I mean, I liked the movie, at least i thought it was horrifyingly beautiful before it started being violent. That kind of left me with a bitter feeling.

So my question is, could the actual plot twist of the movie be that the WHOLE movie from the moment Thomas appeared was just Edith's imagination? Edith wanted to write a ghost novel, but got rejected because of the lack of romance in it. The existence of the ghosts wasn't really explained in the movie and i know the house in England is supposed to be cursed, but the ghost Edith sees in her own house in the US didn't really make sense. In a love scene, Edith mentions how her characters talk to her or something, she says how personal writing is to her anyway. So could she have come up with everything? And what we're seeing is her imagination, the improved version of her turned down novel? Because for a horror movie there was quite a lot of complicated relationships going on. I don't know, does that idea sound alright? Btw i had expected Thomas wouldn't make it alive through the end, but his death scene was so shocking, i had to pause to process it, it was so sad what he was made to do and how he ended up punished for trying to do the good thing even under such conditions.

Glad you gave it a go!

Personally, I don't think it has a moral or message- not all stories do. It's sort of, to be meme-y about it, "Wouldn't This Be Fucked Up? with Guillermo Del Toro." I think there are a lot of interesting themes to consider, though, including:

Love as a constructive vs. destructive force (Thomas and Lucille- yes, both of them, her by action and him by willful inaction -did horrible things for love of each other. Thomas loves Edith, and both drags her nearly to her death AND ultimately saves her because of it. Edith and Alan love each other platonically, and save/fight for each other- even as loving Edith gets Alan serious injured. Carter loves Edith, but his decision to shelter her dooms him and almost her too. Etc.)

Generational trauma (the Sharpes became Like This because of their parents' abuse, but have now turned abusers themselves even as they try to make their lives better)

Not trusting appearances (on a pretty basic level- the ghosts look scary but are mostly helpful; Edith looks sweet and delicate but will not hesitate to Shovel A Bitch if necessary)

Changing roles of women and feminine ideals at the turn of the 20th century. this I really want to write an essay about, so I'll leave it at that

Conventions of Gothic storytelling

Why Are We So Inclined To Forgive Thomas More Readily Than Lucille When, All Things Considered, He's Really Not That Much Better? (Sure, he saved Edith and Alan, but he's never bestirred himself for the other innocents they've slaughtered. And why did he bring a woman he at least liked into all this, anyway? Not to mention making and serving the first pot of poisoned tea Edith drank.)

(seriously if you get into the character bios Del Toro wrote for the actors during filming and later posted on his Twitter, Thomas' Certified Rancidness shines even more. He gave no kind of damn about his first three wives' deaths, found and lured Enola himself with no input from Lucille, and was overjoyed when he got Lucille pregnant. I love the man but he is a poor little meow meow in every sense)

Is The Fate Of Each Sharpe's Ghost ~Divine Justice~ Or Simply Their Own Willingness/Inability To Move On? Which Would Be More Emotionally Affecting?

[infomercial voice] and so much more!!!

That being said, I've considered the same theory you had! At the very least, it would make an interesting AU

(also the ghost in Edith’s house was her mother; I’m pretty sure she explicitly said that. as for why the ghosts exist...it’s a ghost movie? not really sure what else to tell you there.)

#ask #crimson peak #long post #my-name-is-jonas #also Lucille needs a hug and I love her so. there's that.#She's Horrible But ALso Sad Your Honor #just like Thomas

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adultswim2021 · 20 days

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Yappy Broads #1 | February 22, 2010 (online) | Pilot

Yappy Broads isn’t too complicated to explain. It’s a The View style women’s program with five “women”, four of which are men in drag doing very little to actually act like women. We got Larry Dorf, Tommy Blacha, Earthquake, and Dino Stamatopoulos all wearing freaking dresses and dang-ass woman wigs. Their straight woman is Shandi Finnessey, an actual former beauty queen. One could sexistly say that she is there to look hot, but that would suggest that anyone else involved had some other higher purpose for being there.

First they talk to a woman peddling a workout for your face called “Facersize”. There’s chatter about various topics of the day, and then Corey Feldman stinks it up by hawking his CD and his bad Lost Boys sequel. Have you seen it? I haven’t, but I bet it’s bad. The closing credits feature a close-up of Shandi holding a shaky bunny rabbit, which is pretty nice.

The entire thing is ad-libbed, with a group of funny fellas all chiming in with attempts to be funny. There are moments that show promise, and they usually involve Dino being cantankerous. It seems highly edited down, yet the highlights are still sparse. The single defining moment of this show is Earthquake commenting on a nose exercise: “you know how much cocaine you could do with your nose like this? (no audience response) You be tore up! (no laughter).” To be fair to the show, I did laugh at that, but not in a nice way.

There’s something special about watching TV go off the rails. But this seems like it was designed to already be off the rails. I didn’t really enjoy this. I can’t tell if the problem is that they’ve edited it down too much or if they didn’t edit it down enough. I would love to see the unedited taping of these segments to judge for myself. Even if this were especially funny, it still seems a little wrong to air something like this on a weekly basis.

Anyway, Shandi Finnessey has only done one nude photoshoot and it was for Peta.

MAIL BAG

The Simpsons has killed off its beloved character Larry Dalrymple or "Larry The Barfly." Thoughts on this development? Memories to share? Comments? Questions? Dyns?

I actually watched some of a YouTube video about this and the commenter took issue with the story of the episode being about Larry being lonely and left-out Homer and his friend's fun adventures, because they observed that Larry seemed like he was friends with the hat guy, and that it was a horrible omission. Like the writers should just be presenting an episode that strives to not contradict the previous 800 episodes instead of doing a specific, interesting story. Seemed like a baby-brained way of complaining about the show. My baby-brained takes on cartoons are the only takes that truly matter.

Soul Quest Overdrive has the leader of the proud boys as a voice actor on the show. He was the one who spearheaded that whole January 6th insurrection thing back in 2021, the one that every news outlet was comparing to 9/11 when it was really more like the world's biggest temper-tantrum. He blamed the show being cancelled on the other VA's "Not being as funny" as him.

It's weird how I've hated that guy for as long as I've known about him, and him doing a 180 politics-wise did nothing to affect his standings. But January 6th is maybe the hardest I've ever laughed at anything, so I guess he does deserve some credit.

I don't really know WHY they changed them to sports equipment, this is pure conjecture, but maybe AS felt like having 2 food shows on at the same time was a bit too cheap/cash grabby, so they changed them to differentiate it a bit more. I know they've shot down shows related to hell and food when Development Meeting was still running since they hit that well so many times.

Yeah, that actually does sell the case for it being a creative decision. Maybe it's not sneaky at all, what they're doing.

As for "Eggball", if you look closely on the pinball machine you can see black shake as a decal on it, still on (HBO)max. They can erase a HNIC but they can never erase history.

I had read about black guy cup being on the machine, but I simply must admit that I did not notice it myself!!! Not sure what those letters mean there, but I'm going to assume that none of them are slurs and publish this immediately without looking it up.

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #yappy broads

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boy-above · 27 days

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scara for the ask game?

favorite thing about them:

i love his lore so much esp his kabukimono days but i can't really talk abt it in detail without sounding like a fool so i will just say that i love a good tsundere.

least favorite thing about them

this isnt a problem with him as a character but rather hoyo's diabolical habit of connecting characters via lore and then never having them actually interact in game. if he never meets kazuha i'm gonna combust. so perplexing.

a joke answer however would be that they won't let me look up his basketball shorts while he's swimming

favorite line

theres a lot of wild shit he's said that i like but tbh my first thought was when he said "goodbye, wise deity. And You Two 🙄" i love his snark and i love that he doesn't hide the fact that he likes

brOTP

him and nahida, i'm sure it's everyones brotp for him sdfgh i love that nahida utilized his soft spot for children to domesticate him like a wild animal.

OTP

kazuscara and kabuniwa, really has that "i'll love you in every lifetime" vibe.

nOTP

him and mona probably, i hc him as gay so i don't particularly enjoy seeing him with ladies.

random headcanon

he and niwa were in LOVE okay

unpopular opinion

i don't think being a puppet necessarily means you're an advanced robot or something. i see him more like a magic doll. ei didn't even know what a camera was, i don't see her being able to engineer a complicated robot. if the text contradicts this though feel free to call me dumb lmao

song i associate with them

honestly i'm weird about music, a lot of the stuff i listen to doesn't even have lyrics, and when it does have lyrics i don't really pay attention to them? i'm very much about sound rather than whats being said. so i can't rly answer this one lol

favorite picture of them

BABY YOU ARE MY ANGEEEEEEELLLLLLLL

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cryptidanathema · 2 months

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jasper

Why I like them: He turned out to be a much more complicated character than he seemed to be on the surface. It took me until his literal last scene in the game to realize this but damn if that scene didn't paint all of his actions in a new light. Like yeah he's still a bastard but you saw WHY he became the way he did. How easily it all could have been avoided. How he and Hendrik deserved the chance to move past the lies that poisoned their relationship without him having to be a ghost living in his armor. It hurt in a weird way. He became my first true character hyperfixation and honestly opened my mind to engaging with fiction in a whole new way. No one deserves to be painted in the Crying Lucifer Painting pose more than him lol

Why I don’t: I will forever have a chip in my shoulder that he didn't get a redemption arc, sorrynotsorry. Even Party Chat tries to desperately downplay the significance of the armor scene if you check it on the now-memorial balcony. On a lighter note the fact I missed 99.9% of the Piers fandom is entirely his fault because I was too busy hyperfixating on him lol. Also, the classism. The classism is bad, mkay? :P

Favorite line: His melodramatic evil speech in the throne room where he lists love first as something he's given up on is hard to beat. Also his final line in the game being "we will never be apart again'...yeah 🥲😭

Favorite outfit: The evil queen ensemble. It's so...very. Exactly the sort of thing a raging disaster gay that designs his own outfits (according to the character book) that's devoted himself to eeevil would wear.

OTP: He literally only makes sense as a character if you assume he was extremely, painfully gay for Hendrik and sublimating it in a WEIRD way. And Hendrik certainly showed enough signs of feeling the same way (the way he clutches his necklace to his chest after his death in the first timeline...) Mordegon and Heliodor's toxic monarchy just got in the way...

Brotp: Jade was apparently just as close to him as she was to Hendrik but the game NEVER EXPLORES THIS AT ALL. Also I think he and Sylvando could have been absolute terrors together lol. And I've always liked the headcanons where he and Mia bond over their shared pain and rage at their (perceived) abandonment.

Head Canon: Quite a few, so I'll just share one that he wrote the MOST emo poetry as a pining teen, something he will never admit to on pain of death as an adult. I'll also bring up the fact he's successfully taken over the world but still paying for cake as proof he's not as happy as he thought he'd be and eating his feelings about it in Act 2 lol

Unpopular opinion: No one reads deeply enough into him, everyone takes the bullshit he tells himself at face value even when he directly contradicts himself *eyetwitch* I often suspected I was literally the only person right about him lol. Also, the Gay Armor Marriage was incredibly touching, but not enough. He shouldn't have died at all. Also while I've read Jasper/Sylvando fic and enjoyed it before I don't really ship him or Hendrik with Sylv myself which kinda feels like a minority take in this fandom

A wish: At this point I can only hope he gets the Psaro treatment where his death is avoided entirely when the game is rereleased in like 25 years

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: I honestly don't want Square to revisit him, they treated him so harshly compared to other villains of the same caliber that pretty much got away with everything so yeah, just leave the angry wet cat man alone guys...

5 words to best describe them: Poor little meow meow supreme 💛

My nickname for them: Bastard son, the Purple Titty Monster (for Unbound obviously)

#Yep still abnormal about him #Ask game #Jasper dqxi #dragon quest xi #dqxi #dragon quest #shipping #HenJasp

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kate1028 · 1 year

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❗️Spoilers for Tsats❗️

Okay so I’ve seen a few reviews on tsats now and I wanted to give my opinion about it now. First of all: I absolutely loved it, like I immediately started rereading it after I finished it. Nevertheless I have some things I want to point out and talk about:

Will not bringing a weapon with him: That’s a point that actually annoys me because Wtf? I really see him being the person, who brings as the last one a weapon with him if they go to a field trip or mortal world quest but into Tartarus? No, I really think that he would bring a weapon with him. Besides it made him seem helpless most of the time, which isn’t right.

Nyx describing the cocoa puffs as their children: Like ewww no that weirded me out so much, please no stop that. That really bothered me.

The writing is different to the other books: Yeah obviously that was going to happen, because Rick didn’t write that book alone and honestly it’s not really bothering me by now, it’s just different and we’ll see wether it will bother me at some point (I don’t think so)

Percabeth and dam: Okay yeah maybe it’s rather unusual for the characters in the book to use these words/ that joke but I still love that it was in there. It’s just something from the fandom in the book and I couldn’t care less that it’s maybe not that logical.

Will’s character: So about this there seems to be a lot of contradicting opinions but I admit I didn’t think he was out of character (yeah the part that he was so helpless most of the annoyed me too a bit but I think that’s mostly because he didn’t had any weapons, which I already mentioned earlier) Apart from that I really think that he would freak out in the underworld, and maybe it also seems really extreme because he’s down there with the literal opposite of him, when it comes to this. Like, Nico’s second home is the underworld and he likes the darkness and has no problem with death. Will on the other hand is a child of Apollo (btw Apollo already mentioned his concerns about Will being in the underworld in ToA 5) and can’t deal with darkness that easily like Nico does, and even prefers the light over the darkness, which is completely valid. Furthermore he is a healer, his fatal flaw is probably not being able to accept that sometimes you just can’t heal and help people, so obviously he’s weirded out by being in the underworld, surrounded by death. And he also can’t accept it that easily, because for him, as a healer, death is not really an option, therefore I can understand his struggle and the tension that grows between Nico and Will, because Nico on the other hand isn’t a healer and has been surrounded by death for ages. But I think Will does a good job in learning and understanding that you can’t difference death and darkness that easily from life and light, because it’s a circle. But he needs time to understand and adapt, being in the worst place to ever exist while that doesn’t help much either btw. And for my last point: No, Will was never the pure happy sunshine character, maybe we just saw that side of him, but think about it: We know now, that he’s been in Camp already, when Nico came in Camp. Means he’s been there (and maybe had already a closer connection to Lee) when Lee, one of his siblings and cabin counsellor, died, he also seemed to have a rather close connection to Micheal, who died a year later with half of the rest of the Apollo cabin, Will’s other siblings, and all the while he couldn’t do anything, couldn’t heal them. And then suddenly he was the cabin counsellor, a figure role and needed to be brave and couldn’t show too much weakness to encourage the other ones, while still grieving. I think that leaves some trauma too, not as bad as Nico’s but enough to get scared and suspicious of several things. Oh and can we please talk about Will having plague powers?!?! 🥰

Reyna: I wished that we would’ve seen more of Reyna, I’d’ve loved that but that would probably be rather complicated to include especially after she joined the hunters, so I can understand why they kept her out.

Friendship between Piper and Nico: I loved to see them in the end and talking to each other. I think it could really help them to get over Jason’s death. If they would get Leo in now too that would be the best, because I feel like those were the closest people to Jason (and Thalia and Reyna) and then they could get together and help each other.

Hazel: I also hoped she would appear more often but it’s still just one book and you can’t include every single PJ character because you just don’t have the time and space (same applies for Reyna)

My last point: The whole book felt a bit disconnected from the rest of the books of that universe. But there are probably a few reasons why: First, like already mentioned, it was co-written, means another author included their ideas and writing style, so obviously the book will get a different vibe as the previous ones. And obviously you notice that, even if you maybe can’t really name it, because you read fifteen! Fifteen books, who weren’t co-authored, in that world before tsats, which is a lot. Second of all it’s just one book. A stand-alone. Rick never wrote a stand-alone in that world, always five books. Now he wrote one, co-authored. This could be the reason why so much feels fast paced and maybe even pressed into the story, because he had ideas and wanted to put them in there, maybe even needed them, but couldn’t unravel them completely because it’s just one book, not five like he’s used to. A lot needed to happen and happened in that book, so it was fast paced and felt at some point even forced. After reading the book, I think it would’ve been better to make a Duology out of that. Then you would’ve been able to explore things slowly and take your time. Those two things are probably the reason why I felt that this book was a bit disconnected to the rest. Much was missing (like characters: Hazel, Reyna etc), there wasn’t any time to take things slow and explain, like what I’m used to.

As a conclusion there are some things in that book that I don’t like and could’ve been made better but in the end I still love it and it kind of healed something inside me that I didn’t even know was broken. It just felt so sweet and somewhat healing. ❗️That’s just my opinion on that book, and I can completely understand that others think differently as well as respect that, so please also respect mine.❗️

#tsats #the sun and the star #nico di angelo #will solace #percy jackson #riodanverse #my opinion

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tianshiisdead · 1 year

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Forgive me if this is incoherent as I'm half asleep after 2 all-nighters and lying in bed. One of the characters I don't talk about much despite really liking is Arthur, and honestly, that's because my feelings towards the UK are so complicated, but let's forget all that and zoom in on Arthur the character first! disclaimer: it's as I see him, based on canon but with certain other elements etc etc it's personal bias yk

I honestly don't know that much about British history outside of the basics, but! Concerning both relations to history and also characterization in general, Arthur is such a fascinating little man to me. He just really hits the spot, his little contradictions, when interacting with Wang Yao in my fav era (late 1800s to early 1900s) he's so arrogant but you start to see weariness creep in as well esp when he gets irritated or riled up, the way his old inferiority complex from being beaten up and the former runt of Europe seeps into his 'gentleman' facade, etc. He's a little plain and it shows in his design which I think is really cute, his spiky hair that's not super soft, big eyebrows, can't escape his rough and tumble past no matter how much he slicks back his hair. He's really Someguy but also not at all, I love the whole tsundere thing actually! I don't necessarily like it exaggerated too much but I love this guy who does feel things but would rather die than show it clearly, who keeps a distance from those he loves as well as those he hates, and who pays too much attention to this concept of etiquette and pride and respectability but also feels things so strongly it becomes hard to cover up. Tying into this weird relationship with showing emotion is the stiff upper lip thing. He can be foolhardy too, he becomes quite good at planning and is certainly less rash than Alfred but he's definitely not the inherently patient type, his pride overwhelms his common sense at times, his little tantrums when he's frustrated or angry that seem to contradict his determination not to show open emotion (but i suppose it's the 'anger isnt weak emotion' type beat. v toxic) his penchant for smugness when things go his way. He's not very glamourous and filled with little contradictions struggling against each other and he's somehow both suitably elegant and intimidating, while also being an absolute pathetic fool of a man, and it's great it's great love that

#hetalia #tia rambles #hws england #look away she's arthur posting #im literally bad at life forgive me for any bad characterization

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baekura · 1 year

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Am I misunderstanding here?

Idk tell me if I’m obviously in the wrong here, but I had a weird conversation with a friend last night. I told him he could infodump to me about his yaoi boys if he wanted to (by which I meant like characters, plots, themes, and stuff, but I guess since I didn’t specify that, it must not have been clear). It very quickly escalated to him saying one of the manga he was reading was good bc he liked the themes and kinks, so I said “Good ol two for one lol” cuz like good for him I guess. He wanted to open up the conversation to sex stuff (was pretty vague about it other than the implication that he is a horny person in general, which like, whatever. Again, good for him). I said I don’t mind talking about sex (implication: in a general sense; again, guess I wasn’t clear) as I’m sex positive even though I have complicated feelings about it related to myself. He then straight out asks what I’m into [sexually]. “Been curious ;)”

I tell him I’m not really into sex being as I’m on the ace spectrum, hoping this would be enough to imply that I don’t really have sexual preferences to talk about. He says that’s fair and I assume he understands! But then he asks what dynamic I would be into if I would be into sex. I should have said something like “I don’t have any preferences. Again, ace.” But I said bottom I guess because I felt like he’s going to keep asking until he gets an answer. He tells me he like likes topping so he’s loving this.

He tells me if I have any questions then I can feel free to ask because he’s an exhibitionist and gets off on this. It became increasingly more clear to me that having a conversation about sex was meant more in a flirting sense than in an actual making conversation sense. So I ask him if he’s asking me about my sexual preferences because he wants to make conversation or if it’s because he’s sexually interested in me. He says it’s a little bit of both, which fine, whatever. Feelings are feelings. I still establish outright that the feelings are not returned because as I said before, not much of a sex person being as I am ace.

HE THEN PROCEEDS TO SAY HE THINKS ACE IS INTERESTING BC HE HAS AN ATTRACTION TO DEVIANCE. I misunderstood what he meant bc I asked if he meant counter culture and alt type stuff and he said moreso “contradictions, androgeny, and challenge” and that he “gets horny from the lack of horny and maybe stubbornness.” (Like, please don’t turn my sexual orientation into a fetish please??? Asexual people are not a challenge for you to overcome or break through to)

He asks if he can tell me something spicy and I say if it’s something that involves me then I ask that he not but if it’s a general fantasy or description of a kink that’s fine. He then tells me he’s been masturbating to our conversation, which y’know, involves me so I am uncomfortable (but don’t say anything because I already established the boundary but he didn’t care to follow it anyway so what would he care if I told him I’m uncomfortable. He didn’t listen earlier when I said I am not into sex then proceeded to still dig for my sexual preferences anyway).

Thankfully the conversation ended not long after this, but did I unintentionally invite this by saying I was okay with talking about sex? Is this the norm? Like I said, I don’t mind talking about sex on a technical level, but is saying that you’re okay with talking about sex opening a door for people to want to talk about you sexually or that they are masturbating to the conversation you’re having? Were my boundaries not clear or was he just being invasive and weird? I’ve talked about sex with friends before in a technical sense, but it was never meant to be like one or both of us getting off on it, just making casual conversation so this was not the experience I am used to.

#not really an aita but #aita #any genuine input would be appreciated #delete late maybe #ghost.txt

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bonesandthebees · 1 year

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And then there’s Phil. There’s so much to unpack there. Wilbur instantly thinking they’ve been found out. And freaking the fuck out, while Phil continuously mistakes his panic for something else because he has no reason to suspect that they know Ramboo is a spy and even if he did, there’s no way he would connect that to running, because it’s a stupid idea. Phil wouldn’t expect Wilbur to pull something that stupid.

I feel like Phil’s one flaw when it comes to his relationship with Wilbur, is that he always thinks he knows him. He thinks he understands when he doesn’t. He thinks this is still about the fight with Tommy. He thinks there’s just too much going on in Wilbur’s mind. He thinks Wilbur full trusts him because Ranboo told him and he wants to believe that.

And it makes it so much easier for Wilbur to lie. Any nervousness Wilbur has when Phil brings up Quackity and the shuttle, Phil takes as Wilbur trying to hide that he’s being blackmailed. I don’t know if he came there with that idea or if Wilbur’s nervousness and story gave him the impression that was what was happening. Either way. Dadza mode has kicked in at the idea of his kid getting blackmail eve. If it’s technically not his kid or responsibility.

And boy are whatever parental feelings Phil has for Wilbur at this point getting in the way of rational thought. Any time Wilbur wants to change topic he just has to go for “I’ve been thinking about your offer”. Or simply a future spent together and Phil is gone to the possibilities. The idea that Wilbur thinks he won’t need the shuttle anymore is because he’s going to stay is enough for Phil to believe him even if it’s a shit lie. (unless Phil is faking it but then I’d wonder why).

Then also any weird behaviour is written off under, Wilbur has been acting odd since his last fight with Tommy. The odd behaviour is obviously the result of the fight. So Wilbur can get away with that too. At the same time. Phil does want to check up on him and talk about it, because normal Wilbur comes to him, but this time he didn’t.

Phil thinks Wilbur trusts him, so when Wilbur says he can’t tell him, it has to be because he can’t articulate it. When Wilbur says he’s scared, it has to be because of the fight with his brother. He has to be scared they won’t be able to fix it. Because Phil is there to protect him, and there’s nothing else to be scared off. (or so Phil thinks).

I might be very very off with this, but oh well.

-🎄

YOU GOT IT!! one of phil's major flaws is that he assumes he knows things he doesn't. he assumes he understands how other people work or what they're feeling, but the truth of it is that a lot of times, he's wrong because he's not all-knowing. he doesn't know what's best for everyone. he doesn't know how others will to react to things. he assumes he knows what's going through wilbur's head now, and he's wrong.

it's because of this flaw phil has that wilbur is able to get away with it. he assumes he knows what's going through wilbur's head, so as long as wilbur doesn't contradict that, he's not going to suspect him. he'll make up his own reasons for why wilbur is upset. like, it's a shit lie, but phil believes it because of his own arrogance and his idea that he knows best. man, I love writing complicated phil.

you're not off at all, you actually articulated all of this extremely well. in the dsmp, c!phil assumes that he knows what's best for other people a LOT. doomsday is a great example of this. he assumes that he knows better than the citizens of l'manberg that the country is a bad place and needs to be destroyed because of his own experiences with it. we also see this when he's trying to help c!tommy and giving him advice. he assumes he knows what tommy should've done even though he wasn't there. so I've loved incorporating this aspect of his character into stars!phil

#ask #spruce anon #the stars and their children

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canonicallysoulmates · 11 months

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I am halfway through TOTBT and I have so many thoughts. So here's a mini half-point check-in. And keep in mind I still have 50%, and one more controversial scene, of this book to go so thoughts, opinions and feelings might change after I read the second half. But I'm very surprised so far cause I was fully prepared to hate this book and yet I don't, I don't love it either it is definitely not as good as any of the original trilogy books but it's also not as bad as I expected it to be.

To me- the way I'm thinking about this book is divided in two. There's the plot and then there are the characters. And plot-wise I don't care for it. I find it slow-moving, borderline boring, very frustrating the majority of this first half I've wanted to slap Lestat for being such an idiot and not seeing how this was obviously a con, and I know he was swept up and blinded by his desire to be human again but it doesn't matter he annoyed me. It feels weird to say it but the plot of this book is the weakest part, to me it's uninteresting and I don't know how to explain it but it feels like the plot is just...there like it was the most convenient way for Rice to give Lestat what he thought he wanted and explore what that means for the character. Like, I feel we could have gotten the same character exploration with a non-body-thieving plot. I guess I'm trying to say that the plot does not feel important but it kinda is because Lestat is stuck in a mortal body that isn't his own and that's where the stakes lay but the thing is I'm reading this knowing damn well that he does get his body back so maybe that affects how I perceive things. I'm moving on because I don't know how to explain this and I feel like I'm not making any sense. Point is I don't care for the plot side of things.

But character-wise it is very interesting, or at least I find it to be so and what I mean by that is specifically the exploration of Lestat's contradictive and complicated feelings about being a vampire, his desire to be human again, and his fixation on being good and how all of these things are connected, and the link between that and his traumatic turning into a vampire. And the most interesting part of all, literally this could have been the whole book and I would have been happy, is him being hunted by Claudia, and her being a representation of his guilt and his sins.

Because she was his greatest sin as a vampire and he knows it, he knows him turning her led to her suffering down the road, and her end was horrible, and he knows he should feel sorry and regretful but he doesn't because he wanted her, and he loved her, and she was his daughter. The moment when he "tells her" (imo it's him admitting it to himself and accepting it) that he would do it again was impactful. I really loved the conversations and interactions they had when Lestat was suffering from the fever-induced delirium the whole thing is so fascinating.

And that's where I'm standing so far with this book. Very 50/50, there are some things I really don't care for but there are also some interesting things that I have really enjoyed reading.

#totbt #tale of the body thief #tvc #the vampire chronicles #lestat de lioncourt #non spn #mine

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metabolizemotions · 1 year

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S19 s6 & characters

(forgot about spoiler feature. edited to shorten)

I think in a way, the show had incorporated Andy as the protagonist better this season. The bunch at 23 was hard to root for. The disastrous 5b set a low bar, but I think it's improved considerably in s6, all things considered. We would never know what really happened bts and how much of what we were are results of the decisions were made by network execs. This season, at least they are building towards Andy’s captaincy at 19, and incorporating it into the storylines of the other main characters, in ways that address who they have been for 5 seasons.

Many of the storylines were hard to watch as they unfold in terms of the discomfort level of the scenes and how well they were written and executed. The pacing of b/w and within episodes were a little off. Some episodes had too many loose ends that needed to be tied up, while some episodes were uneventful. Sometimes the scenes caused a tonal whiplash, and the editing made the episode itself even more jarring. It was a good season overall and there were some excellent scenes but imo I felt if some scenes were shuffled around, the season would flow more smoothly.

The overarching storyline of mental health crisis was done well. Stefania's performance was always intuitive and conveyed so much w/o words. Danielle performed Maya’s spiral into a mental breakdown and her healing process brilliantly. Jack’s storyline was actually not bad, though I felt that it was carried by his scene partners. (I have nothing against Grey but his acting really didn’t move me…) I liked Vic’s storyline - the girls’ camp and her taking over Crisis One - a leadership position that focused on mental health. Barrett was great in expressing the gamut of emotions she experienced throughout the season, culminating in 617, when she finally broke down.

The mayoral race was ok as a tangential storyline. Dixon has been built up since s3 as the big bad, the SPD feud since s4 and Ross was introduced to fight the corruption within SFD and as Dixon's adversary since s5. Also what with the station being overcrowded with lieutenants and the boring clinic scenes. But it was not interesting. Seeing as S19 loves to create smoke w/o fire - Dean's lawsuit against PD, Pru's custody battle, Andy's SA lawsuit... the resolution seemed expected. I like not seeing Dixon again tho seeing justice served would have been more satisfying.

I hope Robel winning would mean a change next season. At least have good people in leadership positions and make the show more positive and aspirational instead of the constant depictions of trauma and the uphill battles against the Dixons. Give more screen time to show what a better world could look like, and show good people fighting the good fight having a happier life - at the least, having a life.

I hope they flash out the storylines of the existing main characters instead of bringing on new characters and creating overarching themes and drama w/o satisfying resolutions (and glaring plot holes as plot devices). Esp Carina's backstory, Maya's continued healing, Marina's domestic life, Vic's Crisis One leadership. I'm curious to see how the careers of Maya, Andy and Ross would evolve as leaders. Just want all the women to be badass at their jobs. Jack's found and bio family storyline with Marsha, Lila and Brooke could be interesting. (I don't mind him when he's not being weird and inappropriate or put into other people's relationships cos they don't know what to do with him.)

Some thoughts on the characters this season:

These characters are complicated, walking contradictions. I try to view it from each person’s perspective as much as I could - about a bunch of flawed humans with different traumas using coping mechanisms that have varying degrees of success or the lack thereof.

It’s like everyone has been shrouded in their own fog, in their own versions of reality.

I think ambition/ captaincy also somehow “unleashes the beast” and triggers the traumas. It is used to create drama and also bring out the underlying issues of the characters. Somehow, it seems to bring out their worst selves, the parts intricately linked to their sense of self-worth, their unresolved trauma and their unhealthy and ineffective coping mechanisms.

Ben

Ben has always been struggling with juggling his passion and his supportive role in his family. He was just realizing how he appeared to the others when he went rogue all those times. He was lecturing Carina about not following medical protocol, Maya about her projection of her personal issues on the Dixons, telling Travis n Vic to abide by HIPAA and later during the “mutiny”, he was the only one against it at first when he would usually be the one jumping in headfirst. Sometimes the irony was still lost on him as he thought Bailey was reckless in going undercover in the fake clinic while he always justified his breaking of rules cos he thought he was doing the right thing. I think it might be his mental health crisis arc after having to leave someone behind when he made it his mission to save lives after his friend’s accident. Is he re-evaluating what makes a hero?

Travis

(In s3, a kid actually told him he should run for office cos he gave him an impassioned speech.) Travis being conflicted the whole time and dropping out and endorsing the other candidate is expected. He is an Asian American gay man who grew up in a Christian household with a homophobic dad who turned out to be gay. (Probably also in a tight knit and conservative Asian American church community.) His indecisiveness seems to stem from his conflicting sense of justice and inability to own up to his courage. And his lack of entitlement as seen from his minimizing the prejudice and abuse his community faced esp during Covid, in light of the murder of George Floyd. I think he needs to be pushed constantly out of his comfort zone for him to discover what he really wants and who he really is and also start to move on from Michael and seek happiness. He also confirmed that leadership positions did not suit him and he could not play the political game like Ross and Eli urge him to.

409 was an excellent insight into Travis and Vic, and their friendship (and why this is my fav dynamic after Marina.) Travis calling Vic reckless, selfish, inconsiderate and lack of boundaries while Vic calling Travis judgmental, controlling and expecting people to behave a certain way. The irony of Travis finding it hard to move on while Vic wanting to move on quickly to avoid feeling the grief. But both cos they feel too much but cope differently. Yet they both fear the end when they are still in the thick of it.

Vic

I think Vic was having a bit of an existential crisis regarding her work and she projected her own fears about her own relationship with Theo onto Maya and Carina. Their locker room talk was a foreshadowing of the other shoe dropping. Vic couldn’t believe how perfect Theo was… and the shoe dropped… we see the other side of him. She has always been using humor and gossip to distract herself from her own issues. She tended to stuff her feelings down, since she was a kid, her fears as a young black woman, and the grief of her losses - her grandmother, her drama teacher, Ripley, Dean... Until they explode - like her smashing tiles or snatching a baby during a Crisis One call.

I think this rough patch in her relationship would also be a part of her personal growth as this is her first relationship past the honeymoon phase. She has been trying to help Theo who has been supportive but was in a bad place mentally. It seemed that as the season progressed, she developed more empathy and became more in tune with the feelings of others. (In s4, she expressed interest in psychology when talking to Diane.) Going thru her psychology classes and being around Diane also equipped her with skills to help herself and others. She had shown her unique combination of skills in Crisis One work - her empathy, her quick thinking, her improvisation skills perhaps developed as a theater kid. But she would still need support as she dealt with her unresolved trauma and the emotional exhaustion from her work.

Jack

Jack was abandoned and had and lost a foster family. He confused lust for love, like Andy said they both did. Each time he thought he fell in love and wanted to settle down, he was actually wanting to fill a void. The other party always knew he was not in love with them but in love with the idea of love and family. I think growing up, he learned to be needed as he took care of his foster siblings. He is kind, empathetic and helpful but he never learned boundaries and confused caring with interfering and often overstepped when it came to people in his life. Ironically, he lacked self efficacy and often succumbed to self pity and learned helplessness. He was never held accountable for his actions and never developed emotional maturity and better coping mechanisms.

His conversation with Travis seemed to show his self-awareness of the changes in himself - the loss of ambition and confidence. As I mentioned, it is interesting to see Brooke, a sort of nature/ nurture comparison to Jack. Similar DNA, dissimilar upbringing. Brooke seems more emotionally mature. He told Marsha that hanging out with Brooke made him miss his foster siblings more. I think it’s his lack of a constant in his life, of the time when he first had a family. So meeting Lila is very significant for him and seems like an anchor for him to grow and heal. (I don’t hate him, I just hate that the writers need to have him hijack the storylines of others and make him the hero and when he makes mistakes, he is somehow the victim when he tends to put the blame on others instead of owning up.)

Maya, Andy and Jack

Going back to the captaincy drama in s3 involving Maya, Andy and Jack (which is another long discussion but all three were at fault then, others too…) Having gone thru their mental health crisis recently, Maya and Jack are taking a step back in their ambition and focusing on their mental health and the relationships in their lives. Andy is back in the game, this time against different players.

Maya and Theo

To me, there seemed to be some // drawn b/w Maya and Theo. Theo as a POC and his burden of carrying his dad’s legacy. Maya as a queer woman in firefighting and her strict conditioning by her abusive dad. They both have a chip on their shoulders following their stints as captains. Maya was right about Theo projecting his experience on hers cos he would not understand the misogyny. Just like Maya wouldn’t understand the racial prejudice he must have faced. But their demotions were different in nature. Maya cared about her team and tried her best when she was captain. Just like Theo. Maya’s start was rocky and she didn’t really have the guidance of her superiors nor the team’s support, esp. Andy’s. Theo had both but he was stuck in his own head a lot with his unresolved trauma over Michael’s death and his doubt about his ability as a captain.

Theo

When Beckett was captain, Theo was constantly insubordinate and challenging him. When Andy was trying to help, he saw it as her being insubordinate and the team’s actions as sabotage. To make up for his insecurities as an outsider and his imposter syndrome as captain, he overcompensated. In wanting to be the opposite of Beckett, he micromanaged and overcompensated to an extent that made him a bad captain in another way.

I think as we are seeing the other side of Theo, Vic is too. He also has this side that is judgmental, self-righteous and lacks self-awareness and empathy. He has a tendency to jump to conclusions and stick to them vehemently. He defied a direct order, pulled a cowboy move and forgot about Vic - after his angry lecturing of Maya and Beckett. He accepted the captain’s position despite reiterating that he didn’t want it. But he did not give Vic credit for the fire investigation despite her substantial role in it. He could be condescending, sexist and dismissive, as evident at the barber shop. He complained that Vic wasn’t understanding and compassionate but was dismissive of her feelings and was defensive when she tried to understand. He shut her down and called her “Diane” as an insult and avoided her in fear that she would psychoanalyze him and he had to face his issues.

I think he has been compartmentalizing the parts of his identity - his heritage, the way he behaved around his old neighbors and the way he presented himself to the wider world. Code-switching, as Vic pointed out. He seemed to want to keep his private persona “Theo” separate from his work persona “Ruiz”. But he was also micromanaging his relationship with Vic. He wanted to control their interactions and made everything about him. He interpreted her support of him as interfering and her support of Andy as betrayal. (I love Ripley and Dean but he kinda grew on me and I really want to root for him for Vic's sake, but it got harder and harder. Sometimes he was worse than Sullivan. The finale seemed to set up a redemption arc for him in s7.)

Andy

Andy’s support of Theo was as much about her being reciprocal as it was about her own growth. She has always been good with people - starting with dealing with Pruitt and being surrounded by a large family than the uncles at S19 as she was growing up. It doesn't seem like she has stepped out of Pruitt’s shadow entirely. Growing up with Pruitt, an overbearing dad w/o respect for boundaries, she is used to resisting and rebelling. She is still constantly challenging rules and her leaders. But she used to bring her personal affairs and emotions into work and could be rash and reckless. She was often jumping into situations without much consideration cos she was eager to save people. She did it when Sullivan was captain and during Maya’s initial captaincy. She pinned Rigo’s accident entirely on Maya but after Cooper’s accident, she told Theo not to immediately throw Beckett under the bus. In her marriage to Sullivan, she learnt to support others as well as learning to stand up for herself more, against his controlling and patronizing ways. After honing her skills at 23, she is increasingly able to keep her own emotions in check at work while handling all the big egos and personalities around her and rally people to take action.

Andy, Theo, Beckett

But since her return to 19, she had been going about things her way - to make 19 the way it used to be to her. In a way that Maya fights hard not to be like Lane, Andy wants to be like Pruitt and continue his legacy. When Beckett and Theo were captains, she often challenged them and was insubordinate. Beckett was too careless, apathetic and slow to react and sloppy in execution. Theo was too careful to the extent of micromanaging, closed off and too afraid to take action. Andy and Theo seem to be two sides of the same coin, both being legacy kids with something to prove. They are both not fully confident in their leadership. While Andy is more flexible and open to other perspectives in her decision-making while Theo is the opposite. Andy often reacts before she thinks, which sometimes situations do call for and she has good intuition in fast-evolving situations. All their styles could put both the rescuers and the rescuees in danger. All three are not ideal captains in different ways.

For the sake of comparison, in Maya’s later captaincy, she was level-headed, was open to her experienced team’s input to make more informed decisions and could see the bigger picture and did what was right and for the greater good. She cared for her team and the people she was helping, unlike Beckett. She was fast on her feet and intuitive like Andy. She was careful like Theo.

I want Andy to be captain. I want her to have the chance to grow into it. She has earned it. (Also it has been her storyline since the very first episode and I wish the captaincy drama would finally be put to rest.) I think Andy not accepting the interim captain position could in part be her self-sabotage as women tended to do when they were not convinced they were fully qualified. While men often thought they were qualified when that was not the case. Like Sullivan, who had no qualms applying for battalion chief when he was still a lieutenant or to step forward for captaincy again despite his history.

Ross

Ross is a complex character. As a chief who has a relationship with her subordinate, a parallel can be drawn with Ripley. As a WOC, parallels can be drawn with Herrera and Hughes. She is also where Bishop wants to be in future, a female chief. To me, she is a good chief. Not a great one yet. I think the intention is to make her meet 19, have them challenge her existing beliefs and grow into a great chief. She is still straddling her entrenched mindset as part of the problematic system and her growing desire to challenge the system. I love her whenever she went toe to toe with Dixon. But I’m less a fan when she let her personal life affect her work and became hypocritical, biased and self-serving. I think the last episodes attempted to show that she has changed, but imo I’m not totally convinced with the framing about her challenge of the system as a feminist act w/o also addressing the injustice Maya faced from the system, and from Ross herself.

#station 19 #comments #Maya & Carina on other posts #sorry for the post bombing #posting them all at once cos they’re inter-related #the posts really got super damn long #just sorting out the many tots #simply my takes #sorry for any errors and repetition #most of these were in my drafts for a long time #have been hesitating posting them #just putting them out there #maybe start some discussions

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