#made by order

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

the fact that shakespeare was a playwright is sometimes so funny to me. just the concept of the "greatest writer of the English language" being a random 450-year-old entertainer, a 16th cent pop cultural sensation (thanks in large part to puns & dirty jokes & verbiage & a long-running appeal to commoners). and his work was made to be watched not read, but in the classroom teachers just hand us his scripts and say "that's literature"

just...imagine it's 2450 A.D. and English Lit students are regularly going into 100k debt writing postdoc theses on The Simpsons screenplays. the original animation hasn't even been preserved, it's literally just scripts and the occasional SDH subtitles.txt. they've been republished more times than the Bible

#due to the Great Data Decay academics write viciously argumentative articles on which episodes aired in what order #at conferences professors have known to engage in physically violent altercations whilst debating the air date number of household viewers #90% of the couch gags have been lost and there is a billion dollar trade in counterfeit “lost copies” #serious note: i'll be honest i always assumed it was english imperialism that made shakespeare so inescapable in the 19th/20th cent #like his writing should have become obscure at the same level of his contemporaries #but british imperialists needed an ENGLISH LANGUAGE (and BRITISH) writer to venerate #and shakespeare wrote so many damn things that there was a humongous body of work just sitting there waiting to be culturally exploited... #i know it didn't happen like this but i imagine a English Parliament House Committee Member For The Education Of The Masses or something #cartoonishly stumbling over a dusty cobwebbed crate labelled the Complete Works of Shakespeare #and going 'Eureka! this shall make excellent propoganda for fabricating a national identity in a time of great social unrest. #it will be a cornerstone of our elitist educational institutions for centuries to come! long live our decaying empire!' #'what good fortune that this used to be accessible and entertaining to mainstream illiterate audience members... #..but now we can strip that away and make it a difficult & alienating foundation of a Classical Education! just like the latin language :)' #anyway maybe there's no such thing as the 'greatest writer of x language' in ANY language? #maybe there are just different styles and yes levels of expertise and skill but also a high degree of subjectivity #and variance in the way that we as individuals and members of different cultures/time periods experience any work of media #and that's okay! and should be acknowledged!!! and allow us to give ourselves permission to broaden our horizons #and explore the stories of marginalized/underappreciated creators #instead of worshiping the List of Top 10 Best (aka Most Famous) Whatevers Of All Time/A Certain Time Period #anyways things are famous for a reason and that reason has little to do with innate “value” #and much more to do with how it plays into the interests of powerful institutions motivated to influence our shared cultural narratives #so i'm not saying 'stop teaching shakespeare'. but like...maybe classrooms should stop using it as busy work that (by accident or designs) #happens to alienate a large number of students who could otherwise be engaging critically with works that feel more relevant to their world #(by merit of not being 4 centuries old or lacking necessary historical context or requiring untaught translation skills) #and yeah...MAYBE our educational institutions could spend less time/money on shakespeare critical analysis and more on... #...any of thousands of underfunded areas of literary research i literally (pun!) don't know where to begin #oh and p.s. the modern publishing world is in shambles and it would be neat if schoolwork could include modern works? #beautiful complicated socially relevant works of literature are published every year. it's not just the 'classics' that have value #and actually modern publications are probably an easier way for students to learn the basics. since lesson plans don't have to include the #important historical/cultural context many teens need for 20+ year old media (which is older than their entire lived experience fyi)

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

Toothpaste companies must really hate people who are allergic to mint toothpaste, which a lot of people are! Apparently it's NOT supposed to burn like minty hellfire? (I'm fine with mint candy, it's only mint toothpaste that hurts)

I've been using Tom's fennel for years, but am now trying to find one with fluoride in it, and finding a toothpaste that is no mint and yes fluoride should not be such a huge and infuriating quest. still got some more grocery stores to search, but not even the children's toothpaste in the nearest one had any that were suitable.

Edit: Hey you don't need to keep copying out the tags, I wrote all the Minty Hellfire lyrics here. And then someone recorded them here.

Also, I think it might technically be a sensitivity rather than an allergy, but whatever it is, toothpaste is not supposed to hurt! If it's burning then that's bad and you should try to find a new one if possible!

#LIKE FIIIIRE! HELLFIIIIIRE! THIS FIRE ON MY TONGUE! #I therefooooore requiiiire a new paste tooooo cleeaaan gums #It's not my fault! I'm not to blame! it is the Colgate brand and Crest who've set this flame! #it's not my fault‚ if in their plans‚ they made the toothpaste so much stronger than a maaaaaaannnnnn #protect me‚ oh grocers! don't let the menthol touch my lips‚ don't let its fire sear my mouth and gums! #PROVIDE ME WITH FLUORIDE‚ but not mixed with the fires of Hell‚ and I'll keep all my teeth for years to cooooommeeee #HELLFIRE #MINT FIRE #IS ALL THAT I CAN FIND! #I may be! requiired! to order paaaaste oooonline!

[ultravioletness]

I’ve been making gay knights (and ladies) collages on my phone at work

(Part two)

#gay knights #knight x knight #knightcore #medievalcore #pre raphaelite #john william waterhouse #haz asked me to post them #these are in the order that I made them and it’s not even all of them…. #I’ve been having feelings.. about knights and all of that #i can’t tag all the painters I don’t remember them all #the app I used is the one in the watermark #for all your phone background needs #that was my initial goal and then it spiraled out of control #hold on let me add some more silly tags

[geothebio]

in my five years delivering pizza, these are definitely the best delivery instructions i’ve ever gotten

#shitposting #idk what even to tag this? #pizza delivery #? #anyway this made me laugh #and no the order wasn’t made at like 2am #1:30pm baybee i work the opening shift

[dear-ao3]

#ao3 #ao3 tags #ao3 funny #thank you for submitting !! #submission #law and order #sorry this made me crack up

[the-creat0r]

ITS JOEVER

#MAN. #memeprince talks #nintendo direct #tomodachi life #side order trailer happened that’s the only other thing im looking forward to #edit: fyi I didn’t make this image I had it for a while and it expressed how I felt dnfndmg idk who made it

[unwri-ten]

Apparently being besties with your followers has consequences

#teniseeart #cult of the lamb #cotl lamb #cotl sona #cotl #sona #persona #I made my actual friends into followers for fun #now 3k words later into word vomitting #they turned into a special order for the cult #were besties #hermanos even

[cametotheshowinsd]

TAYLOR SWIFT: THE ERAS TOUR (2023)

#taylor swift #tswiftedit #tswiftgif #eras tour #taylor swift the eras tour #I'm eXHAUSTED #I dont think I ever made thIS MANY gifs in one set #I personally am proud of the choice I made on every transition gif in the middle #sorry speak now and acoustic section you're too short so I put you together in the obvious wrong order - for color arrangement purpose #forgive me :'p #userelena #userleah #btw - I made folklore teal...unintentional. who'd thought #flashing gif #flashing images #flashing tw

[chelseastingel]

⬜️ cinderella ⬜️

Happy Side Order to all who celebrate!!

#splatoon #side order #splatoon art #agent 8 #but in couture I made up… tadaaa

[obsob]

poems and cats from january!!

#journal #mine #i did a rlly nice spread for th 2nd and 3rd but alas....u hve 2 wait and see :3 #idk whether to do like. cat round ups or general spreads i like roundups for feb #i will hve 2 see!! #anyway today i made and mailed orders and organised some things and ordered sm jeans and a fleece #tomorrow i will PERHAPS. bake bread. and do a drawinh #im going to redraw my parallel play drawing bc ngl ive never liked it !! i did such weird colours

[lilowoof]

#I made this to let out the feels of loving my friends who love me back #if I haven't met some of yall I would have literally killed myself so I am forever grateful #and the fact that those feelings have returned....but I still have you guys....it's heartwarming to know that #I love yall #*I walk away to cry out my emotions* #I am not sure if I will make it to the end of the year tbh but I also want to in order to be around my pals and to play games with them #that's how important yall are to me #god #sorry for being so emotional on a thursday night. it just hit me really hard tonight hahha

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

i vote that next year instead of reading Dracula we do a Jeeves & Wooster Book Club. those two never got the rabid tumblr shipping fandom they deserved (disqualified for the sheer technicality of being published a century too soon). we must correct this injustice

#jeeves and wooster #i want to watch tumblr go rabid i want to watch ao3 overflow with jeeves/wooster fanfiction #yes obviously the fandom EXISTS but it's a cozy little neighborhood #a handful of talented artists and writers doing their best to keep their charming little village going #but i'm tired of cozy i want this fandom TRENDING #I WANT TO SEE THIS ON MY DASHBOARD PEOPLE #i swear to you if they made a shiny new tv series tumblr would absolutely obsess over these characters. good omens levels of obsession #it's just such a great dynamic! the good-natured overly-trusting bumbling idiot in constant need of rescuing! #the stoic all-knowing genius who quietly masterminds mayhem in order to protect this one moron he's devoted himself to for some reason #jeeves as a morosexual is just such a beautiful interpretation of the original text #wooster as a happy-go-lucky himbo who stumbles his way into a relationship with a protective caring and supremely competent mastermind #the angst and social complexities of a same-sex cross-class relationship in turn-of-the century london! #oh AND half the stories are about jeeves helping wooster get out of engagements/desperately avoid marriage #two men who live together constantly scheming to maintain their bachelorhood. this is quite literally the main plot point #the gay subtext is there! the gay subtext is there and very ripe for picking!!! #this thing is LOCKED AND LOADED we can pounce literally any time

[candiedfright]

anatomy of akutagawa ryuunosuke

#fanart #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd akutagawa #akutagawa ryuunosuke #bsd spoilers #had an epiphany about my shading while making this #DON'T. don't talk to me about the figure order. it made me want to decompose #candied art

[rxttenfish]

people have got to stop overusing existential/cosmic horror when it comes to animals just Experiencing Things

like flies know what a human is. they know they are very small and other animals are very large. they've lived around megafauna as long as there have been flies. having animals the size of mountains to them is just normal.

#all the care guide says is 'biomass' #i have seen an example on my dash that made me go. #theyre dogs. they know what a human is. we are not a higher order being than them.

[criticalsyourroles]

now i've watched a fair amount of d&d i've started to pick up on the differences between dm style i think

like brennan IS all the bad guys. every game he dms is brennan vs the players. he makes npcs and battles that make his friends throw things at him and he smirks the whole time. he makes them tell him their worst fears and then he makes them do it. and it's awful and amazing and really funny

matt IS exandria. his characters and battles never feel written or constructed, they just feel like things that already existed in the world. it's all about verisimilitude with him, and he's amazing at it. he tends to fade into the background and let the players react to the story and it makes everything he does incredibly cinematic

aabria dms like she's just another player at the table reacting to the story, right up until someone gets lulled into a false sense of security and tries to fool around and THEN she throws a curveball by making them deal with the consequences of their choices. she's like oh you think that's funny?? then i'm about to be hilarious, bitch. and she keeps getting away with it bc she's just that good!

basically, brennan's an evil bastard, matt's the world, and aabria's the queen of consequences

or:

brennan - fuck

matt - around

aabria - find out

#brennan lee mulligan #matt mercer #aabria iyengar #sorry but this made me laugh agdjgsjsgs #petition for a d20 series dmed by brennan w aabria as a pc where a couple eps in her pc kills brennan's bbeg and they swap seats #revealing she was the dm all along #i also really want a round robin series. all dms at the table and they take turns controlling the narrative #whether it's in order or just like. every time one of them kills the dm's npc they become the dm or smth #it'd be really fun i'd love to see what kind of mangled mess of a story we'd get #i haven't listened to that much taz but griffin seems to be a mix of brennan and aabria where he does things for the bit #and then eventually he's like oh btw the bit is immense emotional trauma. whoops!

[secondhand-sonder]

The back of Discworld novels: wowee terry's whipped another wacky and wild adventure for us this time! there's so many silly shenanigans and witty wordplay in this book that you're sure to have a hilarious time!

Discword novels: a cynical alcoholic navigating and overcoming the pointlessness of his job, a transparent metaphor for racism and gun violence in the police system and in general, an intelligent young girl overcoming the ideas she's been taught by her culture and the media she consumes, just an entire novel made of commentary on war and gender, using talking animals as a way to explore what defines personhood and contrasting stories vs reality, an ex-convict coming to terms with the damage he's caused and fighting monopolies that are trying to do the same thing,

#and then the ex-convict's name is Moist von Lipwig #yes i made them sound more serious than they are but the book descriptions always do the opposite so it balances out #the books i'm talking about in order: guards guards; men at arms; the wee free men; monstrous regiment; the amazing maurice; going postal #discworld #gnu terry pratchett #sam vimes #moist von lipwig #tiffany aching #monstrous regiment