#missing u a lot today

[littlefridayhoney]

hope gangloff, may - december romance (2013) // jonghyun, before our spring (2018)

#jonghyun #shinee #happy birthday our beloved jjong #missing u a lot today #art #kpopxart #mine mine mine #fly art

[dandelion-roots]

[ID: a digital redraw of the scene where chuuya shoots dazai in the shoulder. on the top of the drawing is chuuya holding a guy to dazai's head in the red and grey hallways of the prison. on the bottom of the drawing is dazai's pained face. the gunshot is shown stylistically as hectic lines behind his bloody shoulder. over the image is half a quote from goncharov that reads 'if we really were in love you wouldn't have missed.' the signature says dandelion-roots. end ID]

This quote from Goncharov (1973) in relation to soukoku has been haunting me from before I even got to that scene in the anime (the full thing is: Katya- Of course we're in love, that's why I tried to shoot you/ Goncharov- If we really were in love you wouldn't have missed). Violence as a tool for communicating emotions, especially love and hatred, especially love and hatred makes me go feral- how could I not think of the iconic quote that says that katya's miss was a sign of a lack of love/a fake love when chuuya didn't miss? Just... losing it over here.

#bsd #bsd s5 #bungou stray dogs #soukoku #soukoku fanart #bungou stray dogs season 5 #bsd spoilers #dazai osamu #chuuya nakahara #not to tell on myself but i just realized that i. used the wrong screenshot as ref JKDSKDJKDJ i have too many saved. its fine. u get it #just saying it in case anyone was confused #goncharov #also just to be clear if someone didnt understand the caption- i used the quote to be the opposite of what was happening #not to describe what was happening in the scene or to imply that chuuya later not killing dazai was him 'missing' #i get VERY specific imagery in my mind and i disregard everything else #and i do it in the way that would be incredibly confusing to most ppl at first glance. such is the world #im not wordy rn i cant fully describe my feral state after finishing bsd earlier today or this thing. hope u enjoy it anyway! #it was rly fun to do a screenshot redraw the bsd animation crew is so freaking talented and i got to see which colours they used where #i changed them bcs they wouldnt been too desaturated but lots of blues in the bg! colour theory babyyy #and got to play around w csp! fun fun been so long since ive done digital art

[b4kuch1n]

hahaha wheee haha

#sk8 the infinity #kyan reki #hasegawa langa #renga #continuing to tag ship instead of answering any of the reporters' questions #as you can see. I am still on my Reki Speaks English Pretty Fluently But Can Not Read It For Shit bullshit #and also. teen shenanigans. which can also be grown up shenanigans if ur not a square #man. todays been a Whole thing. how was it really the case that every art supply store I went to ran out of black ink #three! I went to three stores! literally a triangle in the city! #still have some of the devils tar left but I'm not enthusiastic about it #well! that's for future baku to care about and for me to ignore babeyy #tbh this is like. Im just glad I can still scribble a funny comic when it strikes me it's been too long #I don't do that a lot anymore... even tho its such a good measure of like. ur sense of timing #if u can draw a funny comic ur powerful enough to do anything. u can eat the sun u can kick its ass. u can draw a sad comic too #I realized I missed that... #also accidentally sent this from draft without adding tags lol. and tried adding tags on mobile and it spit in my face and called me a bitch #got enough of that. one must never forget one's currently on tumblr #now I sleep. gods. gods do I need a bit of that #have a good night lads. bring a worm onto a rollercoaster. see what happens

[braskide]

this is somewhat a spontaneous thing to state but — everytime someone on my dashboard posts something about their character, i can't help but care. you just saw a pic and wrote fifty tags in the rb to talk about your character associated to it? i read it and i care. you just went into heavy details about their romantic needs? i care. you analyzed every word they've ever said in their source material? get me on the phone cause i care. you just wrote a 2 sentence headcanon / 3 meters long meta post about that one frame? i definitely care and think about it. it's kinda dumb, maybe? but sometimes i also try to think through the choices of tags for example, most people use poetry or lyrics and i always wonder how they're associated to the muse, does it make sense? it's also not just a generalized feel-good way i'm trying to say this, not in a “all of your muses matter!!!” ( they do! ) kinda way, but on a more specific level, i can't help but see the appreciation the people i have surrounded myself with have for their characters.

it's like — i will admit, sometimes i do not have that knowledge about that one muse specifically, or perhaps it's very just.. on the surface kinda level ( i have not played all the titles 🥲. ) but just reading someone being so passionate about their character like they were the one in charge of them makes me feel really light somehow. i may not like all posts ( this is my own issue because i think i'm dumb with thinking i'm annoying sending notifs to people lmfaooo sh*ot me ) but i definitely read the majority of them like its the newspaper and the more in depth one goes the more i want to know what's the next topic, what's the next inspiration, what's the next thing.

#tbd. #i can't sleep so i really just went on the for you tab and read through the posts i missed today.. ... #and i realized how interesting it is!!! !!! #it hit me like when ur frontal lobe finally develops fully #also ! i love when u all post about ur characters cause i'm like.... .. #holding out my palm : put them here . #anyways !!!! #i may not have a lot of free time but . #when i do have time to search through the posts i love reading them !!!

[kim-woonhak]

me to anyone i've spoken to in the last month: i miss xiao dejun so much

#xiaojun #nctinc #wayvnet #xiaojunsource #useroro #itsnctsworld #wayv #nct #xiao dejun #*ambiv.art #i actually drew this on his bday last month but never posted it bc i'm selfish <3 #but i was watching yt videos of his old vlives (weibo lives?) and now i miss him a lot today :((( #is nct 2022 happening this year can someone lmk so i have something to look forward to #lee sooman please employ him <3 manifesting another nct u title track feature (what r the odds he's in it 3 years in a row lol) #also manifesting ten to be in the title track too bc he wasnt in maw or universe

[lion-buddy]

hehe

#WIP #idk if ill finish this so. here u go :]] #n e way hiii whats up #classes started for me today and all that focusing made me want to draw #idk what is it abt drawing but like. i can only do it if im trying to avoid something. or as an alternative to doing something else #like. youd think id be more productive during the summer where theres less to do but. no. i just Cant for some reason #i have no incentive to i guess. i still Think abt it a lot but i just dontttt feel like it. i get very lethargic sdfgh it sucks <3 #i could never be a professional artist lol id get nothing done ever #ok enough rambling i just miss posting so. byeee

[gentlenotes-moved]

i remember quite a long time ago when i was like 8 and i was at my grandma's house crying about something small and i was so confused why i was so upset about it. my grandma said "well, you might be angry about a lot of things right now, and it's all building up" and i sat there thinking that that was the most idiotic thing i've ever heard. but like. 10 years later and i'm in the exact situation she was describing.

#mine #personal #also turns out i was just still upset about my cat daisy dying recently at that point so my grandma was right lol. i didn't realize she was #right until later. but i've realized over the years that she has taught me a lot of lessons that still help me a lot today. #she taught me that naming ur emotions can help u process + express them n how to be still and quiet like physically mentally emotionally an #spiritually. like her and i would sit on her living room couch together and for like 10 minutes we wouldn't talk. at all. we would close ou #eyes and take deeps breaths and then after a while go back to what we were doing. i thought this was all very dumb and meaningless when i #was a small child but the lessons i've learned from her have actually helped a LOT over the years when it comes to dealing with negative #emotions and difficult situations. i have some confusing mixed feelings about her (personal family related reasons) but i'm honestly #really thankful for her. i miss her a bit tbh.

[stillresolved]

ferre makes aesthetics ( 1 / ??? ): kang rian gaya

heiress (n.) one. a woman inheriting and continuing the legacy of a predecessor. two. a woman who is legally entitled to the property or rank of another on that person's death.

( photos do not belong to me. credit for oc goes to @geaesaekki​! )

#( ferre makes aesthetics. ) #geaesaekki #geaesaekki ( gaya. ) #LYNNIE!! I KNOW THIS IS LATE ON MY END #but also more importantly.... #TODAY'S YOUR BIRTHDAY #HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR FRIENDO!!!! i was dying this past week from a bad cold and then stomach pains #BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO MISS OUT ON THIS :'DDDD #so pls take this aesthetic board as a presento <3 #i was gonna do quinn originally...but then i figured you get a lot of aesthetic thingys for her already #so why not do the muse u have LOTS inspo for at the moment <3 #( one day one of my muses that isn't aeri gonna get into gaya's inner circle.... ONE DAY :'D ) #i hope i was able to capture her vibes....i did peek at her pinboard for inspo too <3 #BUT AGAIN HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ONE OF THE COOLEST PPL IN THE RPC #SERIOUSLY THE WAY YOU BRING PEOPLE TOGETHER AND LIKE JUST GIVE SO MUCH ENERGY TO THE RPC AND TO MY DASH IS IMMACULATE #u're stuck with me now <3 #i hope today was a wonderful day for you and here's to many many more!!!

[bleachbleachbleach]

me: i have a whole list of esoteric bleach posts I wanna make! i should start on those

also me: what if completely ignore folder of ideas and instead

13̛͖̭ͯͥ̂ͣ w̹̩͎͛a̺ͥ̄yͯ͢s̒ o͂f̣̩̘̮ͫ̊ l̳oͪo̦̠̽ki̊͆̄n̛̥͔̘̹ͧg̒ aͪ̈ͯͤ͜t̲̪̻ ą̘͉͂ͫ̉ l̚i͕͍ͅeut̷eͤ͐n̈́ͯͅan̢ͧ̑̇ẗ̳́ͥ͟'̬͍̊ͧs̊̂ e͓x̙͑a͖̫͑ͫͫm͎͕̗̉̀

#someone asked me if i could share a sample document with them today #the doc was kind of a postscript to the worst year of my life to date owing to an exam/what it took to prepare for an exam #and i have a lot of unprocessed AGGRESSION about it and also trauma lol so now i'm like--think of all the possibilities for lieutenant's an #captain's exams!!! so many options!! #do you think if you fail them you get maggot's nest'd because they can't have surly vindictive non-captain bankai-having folks hanging out #i'd say that'd be an incredibly impractical talent drain (not that it would happen often because i assume these are the kinds of exams you #aren't even allowed to take unless you can pass them) but that'd be peak gotei #no brain just bleach #love that on mobile this post just says '13ways of looking at a lieutenants' great excellent not missing a critical word thank u mobile

[b4kuch1n]

haha! bit ill

#bakuspeech #delete later #I definitely don't have a fever my forehead doesn't feel that hot (thermometer shows 38.6 degree c) well #this is a bit of a high fever for a cold I think. so I might be in for the A virus goin around rn #Ive headed it of when my throat started hurting so Im not coughing a lot #and the guideline says stay home until I get worried. and I made my own food today so Im not worried yet lol #but yeah tldr: sick. not a major chance of it getting worse but I'm keepin an eye on it #so uh. wont be talking much for the next week probably! not that I say a lot nowadays lmao #dont worry about me. I do miss drawing tho have to sit out of drawing yet again.... auuuu #cool story I'll tell u guys later. not now tho I gotta lay down probably #okay alright have a good night lads #we strong! we're strong! we chill n we'll get thru this

[luckitys]

Chilling after a long day of placing landmines in Mariana's house <3

#Luzu #qsmp #luzuvlogs #doing some art style experimenting :] I felt like doodling in a more cutesy simple style today #he's wearing his jacket like a belt thingy- cuz they're on a tropical island yeh #my art #I miss him a lot but I get why he's not streaming on the server rn- I hope la velada goes well! #I wanna do a more 'serious' piece of him... someday... when i dont feel so tired ;u;

[janggtoco]

alexa play not my fault by reneé rapp and meg thee stallion

#we ignore the fact that i’m wearing a silly christmas sweater underneath this heart cutout :-) #anyways my makeup today made me realize i’m missing a lot and need to restock lol #and throw out a lot skdhsjs #my face <3 if u dare #🍯.txt

[apatheticlexicographer]

MOTHERFUCK i did not realize how much those antidepressants made me feel physically psychologically and dare i say spiritually like a peat mummy

literally 2 days off them and i've experienced more joy, lucidity, motivation and general good vibes than i did in the whole 2 months i was on them 😭😭

#now granted i did only sleep for 3 hours #but i felt more refreshed and energized today than i ever did when the pills forced me into 8 hours of pseudo-death a night #MY INTERNAL MONOLOGUE IS BACK TO NEVER SHUTTING TF UP #it was practically bones for so long oml #i'm usually annoyingly verbose but i was only able to say like 5 words at a time before i forgot how to end my sentence #yeah i'm prolly gonna lose the rose tinted glasses in a few days when the novelty wears off but for now #it's so nice to feel like myself and not like a lobotomized skinwalker trying to wear my own mannerisms convincingly #(obvsly they help some ppl or they wouldn't be an option to prescribe but GOD they fit my brain chemistry as well as a fork fits an outlet) #<<<<<<I CAN DO THAT AGAIN!!! I MISSED MY STUPID METAPHORS AND MY BAD PUNS AND MY SLIGHTLY OUT OF POCKET JOKES #i was fucking trying but it fundamentally doesn't work if u Try #yoda moment but whatever #yippeee #god did they fucking '''cure''' my ADHD instead of my depression #ok if this is what some ppl's experience of ADHD meds is like then the 'they made me feel like a robot' thing makes a LOT more sense #personally they just make me feel like. yk that one comic abt ADHD with the dog metaphor #yeah amphetamines my beloved let me hold the leash rather than becoming a human dogsled to the whims of my psyche #actually i think i was rather uncharitable to my current dream mask normal pills #i just happened to get mega bitch burnout for 3 months and then spend 2 in the aforementioned peat bog where souls go to die #when not impeded by outside circumstances i think they actually are completely fine #maybe not QUITE as agressively effective as my previous prescription but the ritalin was str8 up harsh #i tried it again for a week and it made my heart beat like it was being powered by a caffienated hamster #but when i used to take it i was already experiencing Real paranoid gerbil anxiety so it just kinda blended in #i only noticed the Severe Health Issue i got bundled as a side effect #and i keep having to remind myself not to go rose-tinted abt how bad it rlly was in retrospect #do i just need to leave a sticky note on my mirror like 'hey dumbass that was NOT a net positive period of ur life' #lexi stfu challenge