#not sure what this has to do with Norway’s post office

[bitletsanddrabbles]

Oh HEY! I Can Share This Now!

So talking about my shitty pest control job in the last post I suddenly realized: I’m no longer employed there and never will be again. I CAN TELL STORIES!

Okay. So. One thing you learn very, very quickly when you answer phones at a pest control service (or are in any job involving people and animals) is that people know nothing about animals. 

Seriously. Not a damn thing. I mean, for example, they get the idea of ‘cat’, but the concept that a ragdoll and a bengal have inherently different personalities, grooming needs, space needs, etc. is a completely foreign concept. In pest control this means that people do not understand that there are some basic differences in how roof rats and Norway rats* function and therefore how you got about getting rid of them, while basically the same - exclusion, baiting, trapping - still requires some fine tuning. You are probably not going to trap roof rats by tossing four traps under the house. And your exclusion points are going to be unique to your house.

In short, beware of any company that gives you a treatment and a price over the phone. They are either one size fits none or that price is going to change radically**. I’d even be leery of ‘ballpark figures’. Now, there are different ways to handle pricing that are more ethical - my company did free investigations, another company I know charged for the investigations, but subtracted that from the total if you went with them - there are pros and cons to everything. Just know that if you call in and say ‘I have ants’ and they say ‘That’ll be $50, we’ll be out tomorrow’ you might wanna get a second opinion.

This is especially true of insects, because there are thousands - plural! - of ant species and they do not act the same!

(Okay, this is getting very long for one, short, stupid story, but bear with me. You need to know all of this to feel my pain at the end.)

The chemicals that will quickly get rid of one ant problem will make another ant problem exponentially worse. Now, if you’re a biologist who knows your ants and have nests in areas where you can get to them easily, etc, pretty much any ant can be easy to get rid of. If they’re in your walls, though, you need to at least make sure you have the right damn type of ant! And all ants like sugar, so don’t tell the pest control people you have ‘sugar ants’. That’s not informative at all!

You need your ants (or cockroaches, those are the other biggies) keyed out. The pest control people need to look at the animal, look for species specific traits that frequently require a magnifying glass, and figure out what, exactly, we’re dealing with.

One of the biggest bugbears in that job was people who wanted us to key things out over the phone. I mean, first off, yes, I had a license, but it wasn’t an inspector’s license, it was an operative’s license. Asking me to key crap was like asking an algebra person a question on advanced calculus. And I was the only person in the office who bothered getting a license, so everyone else was even more useless. But above and beyond that, you could not tell me what I needed to know! You couldn’t! Even with Norway vs. roof rats, unless you were very familiar with both species, the identifying traits were so subjective it was insane! Is it larger or smaller? Is the nose pointy or blunt? Are the ears large or small? Are you sure the ‘baby rat’ isn’t a fully grown mouse?

Can’t be done!

But boy howdy, there were people who were determined! They just had to have me try! And the more determined they were, the fewer brain cells they had.

The most memorable one was the lady who had caught a spider. She was concerned it might be a medically important spider and so she wanted it IDed. Now, while there are hundreds of spider species in this state, most of them are not of medical interest. Black Widows. Yellow Sacs. Hobo Spiders, which have actually been taken off the ‘medically important’ list due to lack of evidence. That’s it. But there has been at least one case of a brown recluse being imported and biting someone. I know because it was a relative of mine who caught the spider and took it to the hospital with her! So I could not, in all good consciousness, see if it met the description of a black widow or yellow sac and if not say ‘yeah, don’t worry about it’. I said we’d have to get an inspector out there to properly ID it.

She didn’t want to deal with it. She was concerned, but if it wasn’t dangerous, she didn’t want to take the time. “Look, can I just describe it and see if you can tell me what it is?”

Sometimes you just have to humor people. “Okay, describe it and I’ll let you know if it’s something I recognize.”

“Okay! It’s brown and it has eight long, hairy legs. What is it?”

... ... ...

I think what I actually said was “That’s could be any number of species. I’d have to send an inspector.”

What I wanted to say was “Congratulations ma’am, you have a spider.”

In retrospect, she could have been a prank caller. We certainly had enough of them. But honestly? After over seven years working there, I honestly believe she was just that big an idiot.

*which did not originate in Norway. Sorry, Norway, for whoever stuck your name on these rats.

**If they let you know up front that it might change radically, that’s fine. Ballparks are unreliable, but as long as you’re told it’s a ballpark, I will cast no stones.

#pest control #customer service #stupid customers #more about pests than you probably wanted to know #it was probably a giant house spider #but we'll never know

[abhishek-chhabra-04]

Icons Media Publishing | Books, eBooks, Audiobooks Publish

When it comes to finding great literature, there are few things more exciting than discovering a book from a new part of the world. From the colorful streets of Mumbai to the serene landscapes of Norway, each country has its unique perspective to offer. But with so many books to choose from, it can be overwhelming to know where to start. That's why we've put together a list of the 10 must-read books from around the world, curated by the best book publishers in the industry.

The publishing world is a complex and ever-evolving industry, with countless players vying for attention and recognition. But some publishers have managed to rise above the fray, earning a reputation for consistently producing high-quality work that resonates with readers around the globe. These best book publishers are committed to showcasing diverse voices, exploring new genres, and pushing the boundaries of what we consider great literature. By partnering with these publishers, we're able to bring you a list of books that are sure to inspire, challenge, and entertain you. So whether you're looking to expand your reading horizons or simply want to discover your next favourite author, read on for our top 10 must-read books from around the world.

Highlighted books from different regions and countries

In today's fast-paced world, it's more important than ever to broaden our horizons and learn about different cultures and perspectives. One of the best ways to do this is by reading books from different regions and countries. In this post, we're highlighting 10 must-read books from around the world, published by some of the best book publishers in the industry.

First on our list is "Things Fall Apart" by Chinua Achebe. This classic work of African literature explores the clash between traditional and colonial cultures in Nigeria, and is widely regarded as a masterpiece of modern literature.

Next up is "One Hundred Years of Solitude" by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. This magical realist novel follows the multi-generational saga of the Buendia family in a fictional town in Colombia, and is a must-read for anyone interested in Latin American literature.

Moving on to Japan, we have "The Tale of Genji" by Murasaki Shikibu. This classic work of Japanese literature is often considered the world's first novel, and follows the romantic escapades of the eponymous Genji.

From Iceland, we have "Independent People" by Halldor Laxness. This epic novel tells the story of a stubborn farmer named Bjartur and his struggle for independence in the harsh Icelandic countryside.

Next, we have "The God of Small Things" by Arundhati Roy. This Booker Prize-winning novel is set in the lush, tropical landscape of Kerala, India, and explores the themes of love, loss, and family.

Moving on to Russia, we have "Anna Karenina" by Leo Tolstoy. This timeless classic of Russian literature follows the tragic story of Anna Karenina, a married woman who falls in love with a dashing young officer.

From the Middle East, we have "The Kite Runner" by Khaled Hosseini. This heart-wrenching novel tells the story of Amir, a young boy growing up in Afghanistan, and his complicated relationship with his best friend Hassan.

Next, we have "The Shadow of the Wind" by Carlos Ruiz Zafon. This gothic mystery set in Barcelona, Spain, is a thrilling ride through a labyrinthine world of secrets, books, and betrayal.

From Australia, we have "The Secret River" by Kate Grenville. This historical novel explores the brutal colonization of Australia by European settlers, and the complex relationships between colonizers and indigenous peoples.

Finally, from the United States, we have "Beloved" by Toni Morrison. This Pulitzer Prize-winning novel explores the legacy of slavery in America, and tells the story of a woman haunted by the ghost of her dead child.

By reading these books, we can learn about different cultures and perspectives, and gain a deeper understanding of the world around us.

Offering readers, a diverse range of books to read

Reading is an incredible way to broaden our understanding of the world around us. Books from different regions and countries provide us with unique perspectives and help us to see the world in a new light. In this blog, we've compiled a list of 10 must-read books from around the world, curated by Icons Media Publishing, a leading book publisher that is committed to offering readers a diverse range of books to read.

Icons Media Publishing understands the importance of publishing books that offer different perspectives and experiences. Their commitment to diversity is reflected in the books they publish, which come from a variety of cultures and regions. From classic literature to contemporary fiction, Icons Media Publishing strives to bring readers the best books from around the world.

Our list of must-read books features works from some of the most acclaimed authors in the world, including Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Chinua Achebe, and Haruki Murakami. Each book on our list has been carefully selected to provide readers with a unique and captivating reading experience.

From the magical realism of "One Hundred Years of Solitude" to the poignant coming-of-age story of "Persepolis," each book on our list offers a different perspective on life and culture. Whether you're looking for a book that will make you laugh, cry, or ponder the complexities of the world, our list has something for everyone.

Icons Media Publishing has a strong commitment to diversity and inclusivity, which is reflected in the books they publish. By offering readers a diverse range of books to read, they are helping to break down cultural barriers and promote understanding and acceptance.

In conclusion, reading books from different regions and countries is an excellent way to broaden our horizons and expand our understanding of the world. The books on our list, curated by Icons Media Publishing, offer readers a diverse range of experiences that will leave them enlightened and inspired. We hope that our list will encourage you to pick up a new book and embark on a journey of discovery.

#icons media publishing #book publishing #free book publishing #book marketing strategies #book marketing

[hugovonsonntag]

Renting And Housing In Norway: Everything You Need To Know

If you're thinking about making the move to Norway, you're probably wondering what the deal is with renting and housing. Here's everything you need to know about finding a place to live in Norway. The first thing you should know is that the Norwegian government has strict regulations when it comes to renting property.

This is done in order to protect tenants from being taken advantage of by landlords. For example, rents can only be increased once every two years, and there are limits on how much rent can be increased by. In general, it's not too difficult to find a place to rent in Norway.

The country has a high demand for rental properties, so there's a good selection of apartments and houses available. That said, prices can be expensive, especially in the capital city of Oslo. One way to save money on rent is to look for an apartment that includes utilities in the price.

This is becoming more common in Norway, but it's still not offered by all landlords. Another option is to find a roommate or two and split the cost of rent and utilities between all of you.

Are you looking for a place to rent in Norway? Whether you're moving to Norway for work or study, you'll need to find a place to live. In this blog post, we'll cover everything you need to know about renting and housing in Norway.

The first thing you need to know is that the Norwegian housing market is very different from other countries. There are two main types of housing in Norway: private housing and public housing. Private housing is owned by individuals or companies, while public housing is owned by the government.

The vast majority of rental properties in Norway are private apartments, which can be found in cities and towns across the country. To rent a privately-owned apartment, you'll need to contact the owner directly. The best way to do this is through an online search engine like Finn.no.

When searching for an apartment on Finn.no, you can filter your results by location, price, and type of property (e.g., studio, one-bedroom, etc.). Once you've found a few potential apartments that meet your needs, it's time to contact the owners and arrange a viewing. If you're planning on renting an apartment in Oslo – the capital city of Norway – be prepared to pay more than average rent prices nationwide.

That being said, there are still plenty of affordable apartments available in Oslo if you know where to look! One popular budget-friendly neighborhood is Grønland – just make sure you don't mind living with some students! Now that we've covered the basics of renting in Norway, let's talk about Housing Benefit (boligstøtte).

This is a subsidy provided by the government that can help cover your monthly rent payments if you meet certain criteria (e.g., low income). To apply for Housing Benefit, simply fill out an application form at your local municipality office or online at Nav.no – once approved, the subsidy will be paid directly into your bank account each month.

Long Term Rentals in Norway

If you're looking for a long term rental in Norway, there are a few things you need to know. first of all, the country has strict laws regulating the rental market, so it's important to be familiar with these before signing any contracts. Secondly, prices can vary greatly depending on location and time of year, so it's worth doing your research before committing to anything.

Here are a few tips to help you find the perfect long term rental in Norway:

1. Know the law - As mentioned, Norway has strict laws regulating the rental market. It's important to be familiar with these before signing any contracts, as you could be liable for breaking them if you're not careful.

The best way to do this is to speak to a local lawyer or estate agent who can advise you on what you need to know.

2. Do your research - Prices for long term rentals can vary greatly depending on where in Norway you want to live and when you plan on renting. It's therefore crucial that you do your research and compare prices before making any decisions.

Use websites like Airbnb and HomeAwayto get an idea of what kind of prices you should expect to pay.

3. Choose your location carefully - When choosing a location for your long term rental in Norway, it's important to consider things like public transport links and proximity to amenities . If you're planning on renting during the winter months , then it's also worth bearing in mind that some areas of the country can be quite remote and difficult to access .

Make sure you pick somewhere that will suit your needs and make life easier for yourself .

4 . Be prepared for high costs - Long term rentals in Norway tend to be expensive , so it's important that you budget accordingly .

Be aware that additional costs such as utilities , internet , TV licenses , and furniture may not be included in the initial price quoted , so factor these into your budget too .

5 . Check reviews carefully - When booking any kind of accommodation online , it's always important to read reviews carefully before making a decision .

This is especially true for long term rentals , as there have been cases of fraudsters advertising fake properties or overcharging guests.If you would like more information, please visit Søkelån.no

How Much are House Rentals in Norway Monthly?

The average monthly rent for a house in Norway is $2,200. This figure varies depending on the size and location of the house. In Oslo, the capital city, the average monthly rent for a house is $3,000.

Is It Better to Buy Or Rent Property in Norway?

It is often said that buying is better than renting. And while there are pros and cons to both options, it really depends on your individual situation as to which is best for you. Here we take a look at the advantages and disadvantages of buying and renting property in Norway so that you can make an informed decision.

Advantages of Buying Property One of the main advantages of buying property is that you will build up equity over time. This means that as your mortgage gets paid off, you will own more and more of your home outright.

If you eventually want to sell up, you should be able to make a good profit on your investment. Another advantage of owning your own home is that you have the freedom to do what you want with it. You can decorate and renovate as you please without having to get permission from a landlord.

Finally, if mortgage interest rates stay low, then it could end up being cheaper to buy than to rent long-term. Disadvantages of Buying Property The biggest disadvantage of buying property is that it ties up a lot of your money.

A deposit on a house can be hundreds of thousands of kroner and then there are ongoing costs such as mortgage repayments, insurance, and maintenance. If you need to move suddenly or lose your job, then it can be very difficult to sell your property quickly enough to recoup your costs. Another downside of owning property is that it comes with a lot of responsibility.

As well as maintaining the inside and outside of the house or apartment, you are also responsible for any repairs that are needed which can be expensive (especially if something major goes wrong like with the roof or plumbing).

How Do I Find Rent in Norway?

If you're looking for a place to rent in Norway, there are a few things you should keep in mind. The first is that the country has a very high cost of living, so your budget will need to be substantial. Additionally, competition for rental properties is fierce, so you'll need to move quickly once you find a place you like.

Here are a few tips to help you find rental housing in Norway:

1. Start your search early. The sooner you start looking for a rental property, the better your chances of finding one.

Properties tend to get snapped up quickly, so it's important to start your search as soon as possible.

2. Use multiple channels to search for rentals. In addition to searching online listings, try contacting real estate agents and landlords directly.

You can also check out local newspapers and bulletin boards for postings.

3. Be prepared to pay upfront costs. When renting in Norway, it's common to have to pay several months' worth of rent upfront, as well as a security deposit equal to one month's rent (or more).

Be sure to factor these costs into your budget when searching for a place to live.

4. Know your rights and responsibilities as a tenant . Familiarize yourself with Norwegian tenancy law before signing a lease agreement.

This will help ensure that both you and your landlord are clear on what is expected of each party during the tenancy period .

What is Norway Housing Like?

Norway has a wide range of housing options, from apartments and houses in the city to more rural options like cabins and farms. The cost of living in Norway is high, but so is the quality of life. Norwegians are very environmentally conscious, so many homes are designed with sustainability in mind.

There is also a strong emphasis on design and functionality, so even small spaces are well-utilized. If you're looking for a clean, modern and eco-friendly place to live, Norway is definitely worth considering!

Conclusion

Norway is a great place to live, and the rental market here is very good. There are a few things you should know, however, before you start looking for housing in Norway. Here's everything you need to know about renting and housing in Norway!

The first thing you need to know is that the Norwegian government has strict regulations in place regarding rentals. This means that prices are relatively stable, and there is little chance of getting ripped off by a landlord. It also means that leases are typically quite long, so make sure you're prepared to commit to a property for at least a year or two.

Another important thing to keep in mind is that most Norwegians live in apartments, not houses. This means that finding a single-family home can be quite difficult (and expensive). If you're set on living in a house, your best bet is to look outside of the city center - it'll be cheaper and easier to find something.

Finally, don't forget that Norway is an expensive country. Rent prices are high compared to other countries, and utilities can also be costly. Make sure you budget accordingly!

#business

[adsthumbsblog]

Make Use of Work at Home Classified Ads

Ever since the start of time, man has always resorted to newspapers for the correct and proper amount of information. From the latest news in all the categories of life to the opinionated and strong words of credible writers and all the way to finding jobs through the classified ads; man has always been dependent on the power of information. But as time changed, technology found ways, as usual, to improve man's way of living through providing him work-at-home opportunities and classified ads to keep them informed on job offerings regularly. Work at home classified ads has been used by a lot of people at present to find good online jobs for themselves. What exactly are the benefits that you can get when you make use of these electronic classified ads?

One obvious benefit is that the work at home classified ads will be able to speak to more people considering that more and more people are getting involved in online activities. It will be able to encourage both the young and the old into earning some hard-earned and clean money from working online through the jobs advertised in these electronic classified ads. Instead of wasting time and money going online doing unproductive things, why not earn extra money and slack off from transportation expenses? Another benefit is that jobs advertised in online classified ads is that you get good security compared to other job online advertisements. Security is one thing that you should make sure when you work online. Make sure that you will get paid for the right amount of service you are rendering for the online employer. This is one very important issue that should be considered when you decide to earn money online.

You might not realize the importance of these work at home classified ads but as time passes and as technology develops, you will be able to grasp the importance and gravity of the contribution of these advertisements to the growth of your own personal economy. Working with classified ads in looking for online jobs will ensure security and information in your hopes of finding a good work-at-home job. Now you wouldn't have to stick to newspapers in order to find job information, you can also try the electronic classified ads and see if you can be as lucky. Paired with the right amount of determination and hard work, you can be successful in your work-at-home job, perhaps even more successful than those working in offices!

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#ClassifiedAdsSites #classifiedadsposting #classifiedads #freeads #ads

[nudibutch]

Tell us about the fishing industry oh wise one nudibutch🐸🐳

in short: its complicated but we work really hard to make sure its sustainable!!

in length: in the united states, we have some of the strictest fishing regulations. NOAA, the national oceanic and atmospheric administration has many child agencies under it: the national weather service (gives us weather forecasts), office of marine and aviation operations (regulates ocean commercial shipping, for example), etc, and most importantly, the national marine fisheries service (NMFS). there are multiple NMFS centers in the US, one for each region (northeast, southeast, gulf coast, southwest, west coast/pacific). these centers do a lot in terms of regulating local populations of harvested fish, also called fish stocks, whether they are caught recreationally and/or commercially.

one of the key things NOAA NMFS does is conduct stock assessments on harvested stocks. these are INCREDIBLY mathematically complex, but they try to estimate the current biomass (amount) of fish, and from that the recruitment (how many new baby fish were brought into the population). this is important info for them to know, so they can tell commercial industry and recreational fishers important things like:

- the size limit of the fish they can catch

- the amount of fish they can catch per fishing season

- whether to keep a fishery open or to close it for recovery

these stock assessments are conducted every 2-8 years, depending on the fishery. you can actually go to their website and see their assessments at any time. its important to note that the large variability in population biomass, especially of smaller fish like anchovy, sardine, etc., is NOT solely due to fishing pressure. it is also due to environmental variables, like food availability, water temperature, predation, and so on, that will impact larval survival (which influences recruitment of new adults into the next year class).

on top of this, they have rules for how much allowable bycatch is permitted in fishing operations; what kind of gear you can and cant use (some gear may harm marine mammals and turtles, for example), etc.

many other countries have similar protocols; however, there are always complexities in any country, and some commercial options are better than others (see at the end of this post for tools to make sustainable choices). documentaries like seaspiracy like to spin an alarmist narrative about fishing and overfishing. i would highly recommend reading this vox article that dr. daniel pauly, one of the world's leading fisheries scientists, wrote about the inaccuracies of seaspiracy on fishing and how many statistics they pull in their narrative are outdated and misquoted.

LASTLY, i want to emphasize: fish is one of the worlds leading and reliable sources of protein, especially for those experiencing hunger. not only that, many fishermen around the world rely on fishing as a profession to feed their families. we cannot simply stop fishing -- and we should not. if you have the choice to stop eating fish, thats great. im not judging you for it. but there are many people in this world who would be out of a job without fish, who would die without fish.

not only that, local fish and invert species are a culturally important staple around the world. just look at new england/norway and cod, or lousiana and crawfish, or the pacific northwest and salmon (ESPECIALLY for indigenous communities). stopping fishing entirely would be culturally detrimental to those that eat these animals.

if youre interested in making sustainable fish choices as a consumer -- you absolutely can. for my US followers, monterey bay aquarium has put together a database tool called SEAFOOD WATCH that lets you look up any fish or invertebrate (e.g., crab, shellfish) species and see what the best option is to purchase. so when youre at a restaurant, or in a market, you can support the fishing options that are best for us and the environment.

if you want to know more about seafood watch, and the complexities of choosing sustainable seafood, check out the post i made about it on my main blog here.

#hi can you tell im passionate about this and that this is the field of science im in currently #there is literally so much science too that NOAA and academic unis do to collaborate and understand more about fished species #literally so much goes on day to day that ppl dont realize #i know this was so long but i really hope its helpful #im just really tired of seeing the overfishing misinformation. i really am #globally we are sustainably fishing 75% of fished species. 75%!!!!! #that stat is from the food and agriculture organization of the UN btw #75% is AMAZING #seaspiracy etc likes you to think we're overfishing 100% #we arent. we arent #im not saying fishing is perfect. but we cant just abandon fish as a food source #its perhaps the best option compared to domestic terrestrial sources #answered #anonymous

[nerdygaymormon]

#love is love #Santa finds love #50 years?!! #congrats Norway! #beautiful love story #not sure what this has to do with Norway’s post office #merry christmas

[therealvinelle]

Ok I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I'm just now copying your Norwegian Bella AU into a text translator, and if you don't already have 50 people in your inbox demanding a translation then shame on ALL OF US because this is glorious! And while Google Translate does have a certain charm (it translated "piper hun ut" as "she beeps") I'm curious to see how you'd put it in English.

Troquantary is referring to this post. In which Bella doesn't speak English.

Fun fact, you're the only one who's gone into my inbox to request this. I was so sad, had the translation half-written and everything, but I was too proud to beg. So thank you, Troquantary, for popping this ask.

As for the dictionary fuckups, sounds about right. I made a few typos, too, that made Google Translate suffer even more. (Such as managing to mix up "henne" (her) and "hendene" (hands), resulting in Aro patting Bella instead of clapping his hands. Poor Google.)

Also, there are a few cultural references and language things that would be lost in the translation, in an attempt to keep them I included notes clarifying things.

Some things, like Aro and Carlisle's very old man way of speaking, are easier said than done to translate, you'll have to bear with me there.

Additional notes are that I added a few things to this version, many of them because translating is hard, but a few because while translating I thought "oh you know what would be much funnier-" and then wrote that.

Alright, without further ado:

When Renée left Charlie she did not go to Florida, she went to Oslo. And she went all in to make her daughter a true Norwegian, hiring Norwegian nannies and making sure never to speak English around the child. Since transatlantic flights are expensive, little Bella Swan rarely got to visit her father, and as such she never did learn what should have been her native language.

She quickly forgot what English she did have in favor of Norwegian, with the exception of words like “Yes”, “No”, and “I’m Bella”.

The few trips she took to visit her father were all the more awkward than in canon since she couldn’t play with the Black kids. Let not the blame fall upon Charlie: he took Norwegian classes and speaks conversational Norwegian. He can’t speak to Renée, because her Norwenglish is incomprehensible even to Norwegians, but he can communicate with Bella.

Not that he’s had a lot of chances to do so.

Bella makes it to seventeen years old, she’s in second grade at Handels* and is a major outsider among the preps there, and then Renée marries a handsome skier**. Together they shall travel the continent all winter to participate in as many skiing races as they can, and in the summer they’ll take gigs at Hurtigruta to see the coast.

*“Handels” is the nickname for an Oslo high school infamous for its pupils being rich and beautiful blonds who are going to be CEOs when they grow up.

**Skiing as a sport is huge in Norway

***Hurtigruta is a famous ferry that travels across the Norwegian West coast

Bella, who sucks at skiing and is too young to work at Hurtigruten, takes the hint.

With dread in her stomach and dictionary in hand she goes to her father in America.

Where she doesn’t speak the language.

Faen.

Charlie gives her a car, and I wish this meta was set in the present because I could have joked about electric cars and the automat only driver’s license*, but Twilight is set in 2005 so I can’t. The car part proceeds without drama.

*An increasing number of Norwegian youth take the driver’s license for automatic cars only, and we’re the country in the world with the highest percentage of electric car purchases.

School is worse than in canon, because she is now a thousand times more sensational than if she was merely the new student. She is from another country! All of Forks keels over with excitement.

To make matters even worse, our girl doesn’t understand a word of what people are saying.

She is too awkward to let them know she doesn’t know English. It’d become a thing, and they might think she’s dumb. To be fair, it’s not good that she’s been through primary, secondary, and now a year and a half of high school and still sucks at English.

So she nods, smiles, mumbles “Hi, I’m Bella” to the new faces, and blushes heavily when anybody says anything.

People assume she’s shy. That’s a bit boring, but oh well.

She has her biology class with the redhead hottie she noticed during lunch. She watched him and his family, they were fascinatingly pretty, but she doesn’t know anything more about them. Sure would have been great if she could have asked the tiny girl (was it Jess?) about them.

Biology proceeds as in canon - Edward badly wants to eat the delicious girl, but fortunately doesn’t.

She runs into him in the office when he tries to switch to another biology lesson, but she has no idea what he’s saying so she only has the suspicion that this somehow concerns her. Which is still uncomfortable, but Bella is probably the problem here. The hottie surely can’t be.

He’s missing from school for a week, Bella finds that weird.

He returns, and to her great horror he starts talking to her.

“Hello”, he says.

Bella dies inside. He’s too handsome!

"I'm Edward Cullen," he continues, and ok, she got that. The hottie is called Edward, that’s good to know. She’s not sure she caught that last name, though, Köln?

He says something else, it’s gibberish to Bella even though she’s concentrating, and at the end there he says “Bella Swan”.

She gulps.

"I'm Bella Swan," she confirms and nods. That should be correct. God, she hopes it’s correct.

He smiles a crooked, boyish smile. She’s awed. She didn’t think it was possible to be so beautiful.

He says something else.

Bella didn’t catch it.

She blushes even harder, she hasn’t been more embarrassed in her life. Here he is, the most handsome guy in all the world, and she has nothing to say to him. Literally, they don’t speak the same language.

She should tell him.

It’s one thing to chicken out of telling the town she doesn’t speak English, but there’s something different about Edward Cullen. He deserves the truth.

But...

He’s the most beautiful person she has seen in her life. He is American, too, so the odds of him knowing Norwegian are microscopical. If he finds out she doesn’t understand a word he says he’ll stop talking to her, and selfish as she is she doesn’t want that.

So with a slightly guilty conscience (but not enough to fess up) she contributes to the conversation with enough words and smiles to pull through. "Yes", "No", "Thank you", and "That's nice".

He is surprised by several of these answers, but instead of giving her odd looks and losing interest he grows more invested in the conversation.

Class ends.

The next day the near accident happens, and he saves her. She is stunned - dear god, did he just pick up a whole car? After teleporting across the parking lot..?

Soon she’s in the ER, and more than a little bit stressed about that fact since she knows the Americans have a terrible healthcare system.

She hopes Charlie has an insurance.

An insanely beautiful man walks into the ER, and Bella is shocked. He is just as handsome as Edward and Edward’s lunch friends!

He introduces himself as Carlisle Cullen, and Bella can only assume this is someone’s older brother. Possibly related to the blonde girl.

He smiles at her, says something, and she answers, "I'm Bella Swan."

He frowns.

That must have been the wrong answer, then.

His hands return to investigating her scalp, and to her great surprise he switches to perfect Norwegian, "kjenner De* noe ubehag når jeg holder her?" Do you feel any discomfort when I touch here?

*De is the Norwegian polite pronoun for “you”. Du = thou = the French tu, and De = you = the French vous. These polite pronouns went out of use in the 1980’s, save for when addressing royal persons, and would be considered antiquated in 2005.

He hurries to add, "Norsk lærte jeg i... fjor sommer. Det var et nettkurs." I learned Norwegian… last year. Online class.

"Hvilket da?" Which one? Bella asks, because Charlie needs to hear about this. The doctor has beautiful, if slightly outdated, pronunciation.

The doctor’s smile turns uncertain. She gets the feeling there’s something he doesn’t want to say. "Husker ikke," I don’t remember, sier han etter en litt vel lang pause.

That’s a shame. And weird.

"De hadde hellet med Dem i dag, som ikke ble truffet av den bilen." You were lucky today, not getting hit by that car. he then says, noticeably changing the subject.

"Det var ikke hell, det var Edward," It wasn’t luck, it was Edward, she replies sharply.

The doctor definitely looks uncomfortable.

She continues, "Han krysset skolegården på et blunk, og plukket opp hele bilen. Jeg så det," He crossed the schoolyard in a moment, and picked up the whole car. I saw it,

The doctor laughs. "Om han kunne det hadde nok gymkarakteren hans vært meget bedre. Nei, frøken Swan*, jeg beklager å si at det høres ut som at De er litt omtåket. Det er helt normalt ved hjernerystelse." If he could do that, his PE grade would be a lot better. No, Miss Swan, I’m sorry to say you seem confused. That’s normal with concussions.

*Addressing a young woman as “frøken” is even more outdated than using polite pronouns.

Why does Bella get the feeling he’s lying?

She’s discharged.

We’ll jump ahead to her trip to La Push - that trip uneventful, since Jacob knows she doesn’t speak English. They stick their hands in their pockets and stare at the sea.

The next day she’s shanghaied to Port Angeles, because apparently she said “Yes” at the wrong time when talking to Jessica (Turns out Jess’s name was Jessica!) and accidentally said yes to a day trip to Port Angeles.

Like in canon she wanders away from the others, and as in canon she is nearly gang raped. And again as in canon she is saved at the last moment by Edward.

He buys her dinner, and she can’t believe her own luck- and misfortune. A date with the most handsome guy on the planet (hence the luck) and she can’t say a word to him (hence the misfortune)!

He says things to her, lends her his jacket, and really this is it for Bella, she’s peaked, life can’t get better than this.

(That’s a lie, it would be better if she spoke English.)

He’s so amazing.

She’s gotten pretty good at navigating conversations with him, so she nods and aha’s her way through.

In his car on the way home the tone takes a more serious turn.

He asks her about something, and it’s a serious question, that much she’s gathered. She answers in the confirmative.

He is silent.

Did she say anything wrong?

(Edward, on his end, just asked if she knows what he is. She said yes, so calmly, not even a trace of fear in her.)

A few days later he takes her out on a walk in the woods.

He shows her a meadow in the woods, and when he steps into it he lights up in the sunlight.

Bella is in shock.

She knew there was something different about him, but- holy cow. This guy isn’t human.

Is she dating a god?

She stumbles into the clearing after him, and they spend a day together where he says things, and she can barely hear any of it (nevermind understand it) because she’s so distracted by how pretty he is.

The next day he takes her to a house in the middle of nowhere. She doesn’t want to guess that this can be where he lives. Surely gods don’t live in houses?

He shows her inside the house, and introduces her for Dr. Cullen and a lady with a name she doesn’t catch.

Bit weird that these two are acting like a couple of parents, they’re far too young and divine for that.

Edward shows her around in an old-fashioned office, and she doesn’t know what to make of i when she sees a painting of Carlisle. Edward launches into a long story when he sees her watching it, unfortunately she doesn’t catch any dates or artist names. At one point she heard the word “suicide”, though, and that’s not good.

She doesn’t get much out of the story.

The baseball game doesn’t happen because Bella didn’t pick up on what Edward wanted and didn’t realize she was being invited to a thing. They spend the afternoon watching a movie instead.

The relationship continues, impeded slightly by communication problems, but she’s mostly able to cover those up.

Until her birthday comes around.

She gets a papercut.

Jasper lunges at her. Edward throws her into a glass table, and then everyone is leaving.

Carlisle is kind enough to switch to Norwegian when he’s stitching up her arm, perhaps remembering the last time she was his patient. "Jasper har ikke vært på dietten vår så veldig lenge." Jasper hasn’t been on our diet for very long.

"Diett?"she asks. She’s never seen Edward eat anything. She wasn’t clear on what the Cullens ate, honestly she thought they were above such things. She was thinking maybe photosynthesis. The knowledge that they apparently eat food astounds her, but diets?

"Dyreblod istedenfor menneskeblod," Animal blood in stead of human blood, Carlisle clarifies.

Whachasay?

Carlisle gives a slight smile. “Jaspers liv som vampyr fikk en brutal start." Jasper’s life as a vampire got off to a brutal start.

...

Vampire?!

Bella’s missed something here.

Oh dear lord, oh fy faen, she has missed something.

“Åja”, uh huh, is all she can say, and suddenly she’s very aware of the fact that she’s sitting there with a bleeding arm.

And Carlisle.

Who is a vampire.

Over the course of the following conversation Bella makes a host of discoveries.

Edward has been a vampire this whole time, and he’s a telepathic vampire. Whether Bella should be a vampire too or not has been a matter of hot debate, but due to religious reasons Edward doesn’t want that.

Carlisle also brings up how Edward died of the Spanish flu.

"Jeg var under den oppfatning at Edward fortalte deg bakhistorien min?" I was under the impression Edward told you my back story? Carlisle asks at one point, and Bella just has to ask very nicely if he’d be so kind as to repeat it.

Turns out the guy is nearly four hundred years old.

Jaha.

Jahahaha jaa ha.

That’s… a lot.

She wanders out of the house in shock, and hardly notices Edward’s strange behavior over the next couple of days.

One day he picks her up at school, and takes her behind the house.

That works out.

He’s a vampire, but he never hurt her. He is endlessly beautiful, perhaps easier to love now that she knows he’s not a god. He’s her Edward, and that’s suddenly easier now that she knows.

They can still be together.

But now that she knows this about him, it’s about time he knows something about her as well.

It’s time to finally be honest with him.

So when he opens his mouth, she opens her mouth as well, but she doesn’t get any further than to “Edward-” before he launches into a monologue.

She’ll have to wait until he’s done before saying her piece. It’s a bit embarrassing, but it doesn’t seem like he intends to stop talking anyway.

And what he’s saying seems to be serious, so it’s probably best to let him finish.

Edward concludes his monologue by kissing her forehead. Then he disappears.

Where did he go?

A big unsure, Bella goes back to the house. She’ll just have to wait until he gets back.

She doesn’t know what to think when Charlie returns from work and tells her the Cullens have all left.

Oh, god.

Edward must have found out she doesn’t speak English.

She made a mockery of him.

He has every right to leave.

Knowing this doesn’t make it any easier to live with.

Bella sinks into a depression.

The hallucinations begin, as in canon, though Hallusinward speaks Norwegian. Thank god for small mercies.

The friendship with Jacob (dictionary in hand) blooms, as someone has to help her see those hallucinations.

The cliff diving happens, and Alice shows up. Bella’s not sure what this is about, but she has gotten good enough at English to know that something bad happened, and Alice wants them to do something.

She’s a bit surprised to find herself on a plane to Italy, though.

Alice tells her to “Run to Edward” and ok, she got that, actually.

So she saves Edward.

After that she’s taken into the sewer, which turns out to house dozens of vampires.

Bella, Edward, and Alice are received in some kind of hall, where an unusual vampire has quite a bit to say. She understands some of what he’s saying, at least the part about “la tua cantante”. She knows a bit about Italian, see, so she knows that he’s talking about a song now.

She wishes she knew the context.

At one point he takes her hand, and appears fascinated by it. She wonders if he’s a palmreader. Not very vampirey, but what does she know.

He asks her a question.

"Yes," she says.

Saying yes has gotten her this far, after all.

But when he lights up and claps his hands together, and Edward and Alice stare at her in shock and betrayal, she knows she must have said the wrong thing.

The two are dismissed from the room before Bella can do or say anything, she’s just listening to Edward make a racket outside in the hallway.

Not good.

The unusual vampire brings her further down in his sewer palace to a basement, and she is given comfortable clothes to wear.

This is getting terrifying.

The vampire leans towards her - and she chickens out.

"Jeg snakker ikke engelsk!" she squeaks. "Non habla ingles!" I don’t speak English.

Han stanser, og ser forvirret ut. "Que- Hva behager*?" I beg your pardon? spør han etter et øyeblikk.

*A very formal, and slightly outdated (you can use it, but people will think you’re putting on airs. And they will be right) way of saying “excuse me?”

Sobbing, Bella tells him the whole story, from how she didn’t want to be the weird kid in school to how she’s now somehow in Italy without knowing why nor what she just agreed to.

When she’s done the vampire starts laughing.

"Dette forklarer jo en hel del," This explains quite a bit, ler han. "Men, kjære Bella, jeg er redd det ikke endrer noe." But, my dear Bella, I’m afraid it changes nothing.

He tells her that she has agreed to serve him and his army of undead warriors into eternity.

Well fuck.

"Du skal få slippe det, når du ikke visste hva du samtykket til - men skjebnen din forblir den samme. Loven er loven." You’re released from that promise, as you didn’t know what you agreed to - but your fate remains the same. The law is the law.

After a moment of silence, during which she looks terrified, he hurries to add, "Vi har en lov. Du må bli en av oss." We have a law. You must become one of us.

A law that Bella Swan has to become a vampire?

People are finally speaking Norwegian, and Bella is still lost. And it’s too embarrassing to keep pestering this poor, polite man with questions.

So she nods.

He gives her a glittering smile, and bites her.

When she wakes, Aro offers her an English course. A language course that, naturally, leads to her staying in Volterra. Why not learn a few more languages while we’re at it, dearest Bella?

Some time later Edward breaks into Volterra to save his Rapunzel, only to barely recognize her now that she’s a vampire who says things. Lots of things, she talks all the time now. WHAT DID ARO DO TO HER.

Too mortified to admit that she never spoke English, Bella claims she’s been brainwashed.

Aro is having too much fun to correct her, and the whole sad affair sets off a regrettable flood of rumors.

#troquantary #norwegian things #bella swan #twilight #twilight meta #twilight renaissance #evighetens kyss #evighetens kyss meta #evighetens kyss renessanse

[tohellandbackanthology]

WE FINISHED SHIPPING OUT ALL PHYSICAL ORDERS (and other important info about your package)!

Hi guys! That’s right! On June 19th, we officially wrapped up packing more than 800 orders of To Hell + Back: A Destiel Anthology and immediately got drunk and partied actually we just talked about the impossible housing market in Vancouver. Barring three orders which were still missing phone numbers, by now everybody else should’ve received a tracking number with their book on the way! 

While we’re relieved that one of the hardest parts of the job is now done and over with, we know that our project is still far from over. With that in mind, we’d like to outline some important info via this handy FAQ about what to look out for as you wait for your package to arrive.

**When are digital books shipping out?**

Right now! As promised, now that we’ve finished shipping all physical books, we’re now switching our focus to digital copies. Please do note that we’ll be shipping digital books in batches, so not everybody is going to get their book at the same time. Why are we doing this? Because sometimes emails bounce and we want to make sure we catch those when they happen. By sending the books out in batches, we can better keep track of these issues.

We will be sending out digital books in the following order: Indiegogo/Big Cartel digital-only backers first, and then everybody else. We feel this order is fair because those of you who didn’t order a physical book have now been waiting a long time and we want to be sure you receive your books at the same time as people begin receiving their physical copies in the mail.

We aim to complete shipping all digital books no later than July 11, but we are working fast in the hopes of finishing by July 5th. 

**I didn’t receive my tracking number!** 

We had multiple checks in place to ensure that we covered every order*** so if you didn’t get an email from Canada Post, please check your junk/spam folder and see if your email might have landed there. If it’s not there either, please message us at [email protected] and we’ll resend you your tracking number. It’s always possible that there might’ve been a typo in the email address that we had on file for you, and if that was the case, then the email containing your tracking number wouldn’t have reached you. That said, even if Canada Post’s email didn’t reach you, you should have received an email from Indiegogo or Big Cartel also indicating your tracking number as we inputted tracking info into these sites too! 

*** A select few packages don’t have tracking numbers. If you purchased a tier that was a merch + E-book combo on Indiegogo (“I’d Rather Have You”; “Cursed or Not”; “I Always Come When You Call”) and live outside Canada and the United States, it was unfortunately not possible for us to generate a mailing label with a tracking number because your parcel was too small. Instead, please keep an eye on your mailbox. Your envelope parcel should reach you within 4-6 weeks.

**The only thing my tracking number says is ELECTRONIC INFORMATION SUBMITTED BY SHIPPER :( When will Canada Post pick up my package?**

All orders were picked up by Canada Post on June 21, 2021. If your tracking still doesn’t show ITEM PICKED UP BY CANADA POST, contact us immediately so we can figure out what’s going on.

**My package didn’t arrive! It says ITEM BEING RETURNED TO SENDER! Help!**

Please contact us IMMEDIATELY if this happens so that we can reroute your package before it’s too late. If the package is returned to us, we get charged for its shipping. Then subsequently shipping has to be paid again to resend it to you! That’s 3x shipping and it’s not good, for either us or you! Please don’t delay a second if this happens. Tell us right away because we are determined to get it back to you! In the words of @justholdingstill, “Over my dead body are they sending it back to us.”   

**When will I receive my package?**

From the point that your tracking displays the message Item picked up by Canada Post, you can expect that:

Canadians will generally receive their packages within 2-4 days, but it can be up to 7 days for remote regions. 

Americans will generally receive their packages within 10-14 days. This includes Guam and Puerto Rico.

All other countries will receive their packages within 4-12 weeks, but we have noticed that these packages are coming WAY faster than that, usually within 2 weeks. Down below is a breakdown of how quickly certain countries have received their fastest package:

Argentina: 15 days 

Finland: 8 days 

Germany: 10 days 

Italy: 16 days 

Mexico: 10 days 

Norway: 18 days 

Russia: 15 days 

United Kingdom: 21 days but so far, this seems to be an exception—only one package has arrived as of today.

All other countries: No package has reached its destination yet that we know of

**I have my tracking number but it’s not showing any movement! Is my package lost?**

Canadians and Americans should have regular updates to their tracking information every couple of days, but please be patient—things happen, packages get rerouted, or sometimes have to sit for a little bit in customs or a sorting facility before moving on to their final destination. 

Likewise for our international backers, you will most likely get regular updates to your tracking information until your package leaves Canada. At this point, you will receive the following notification: International item being forwarded to destination country. From this point onward, you won’t receive any updates to your tracking information for a long time. This is completely normal and it just means that your book is on a boat making its way to your country. After it arrives on shore, you may or may not get more tracking notifications—it will depend on how the next carrier processes your order. In general, for all the international countries that have received packages so far, they have had full tracking upon reaching shore.

**When is my package considered lost? What should I do then? How much time do I have to contact you?**

Canadians should wait 14 days from the day that their package is picked up by Canada Post before contacting us (unless your tracking says that it’s returning to sender, in which case contact us IMMEDIATELY so that we can reroute your package!).

Americans (including Guam and Puerto Rico) should wait 21 days from the day that their package is picked up by Canada Post before contacting us (unless your tracking says that it’s returning to sender, in which case contact us IMMEDIATELY so that we can reroute your package!).

All other nationalities should wait 12 weeks from the day that their package is picked up by Canada Post before contacting us (unless your tracking says that it’s returning to sender, in which case contact us IMMEDIATELY so that we can reroute your package!).

Please don’t contact us before that. We won’t be able to help you earlier than this. We have to talk to Canada Post about your parcel and they won’t take further steps until the waiting period is over. 

When you contact us, please give us the following information via email at [email protected]: 

Your full name

Your shipping address

Your shipping phone number

Your shipping email

Let us know where you’re an Indiegogo or Big Cartel backer

You have four weeks to contact us after the ‘package-is-officially-lost’ date. For example, if your book was picked up by Canada Post on June 1 and your home address is in a country other than the United States or Canada, you will wait 12 weeks to see if your package arrives. In this example, your package is officially considered lost on September 1. You have four weeks to let us know. In this example, you have until October 1 to tell us that your package is lost. If you tell us after October 1, unfortunately we can’t help you! We have a timeline in place for the official end date of our project and this deadline helps keep us on track to donate our remaining funds to our charity of choice, Wish Vancouver, in a timely manner. Not to mention we’ll be selling off our extra books and if you take too long to contact us, there might not be any remaining books for you to have a replacement!

**My tracking says that my package was delivered but I can’t find it!**

We encourage you first and foremost to ask your neighbours and anybody else who lives with you or around you to see if they might have received it for you. Please also contact your postal service to see if they might have held it for you at the post office. Finally, please keep an eye on your tracking and please try your absolute best to be there to receive it so that there is no chance of your package being stolen. If your tracking information declares that it was delivered, we consider it delivered on our end too and as much as we would like to help you, we’re not a business and as such, our funds are limited and we can’t be responsible for stolen packages. If your package does get stolen though, please let us know and we’ll talk to Canada Post regardless. All our books are insured and if Canada Post agrees to pay the insurance amount, we’ll put aside a book for you from our extras sale. You will still be responsible for paying the full amount of shipping. If Canada Post denies the insurance amount, we can still put a book aside for you but you will have to pay the full amount of the book and shipping. 

**Have any other questions that come to mind?**

As always, please don’t hesitate to shoot us a message! We always strive to get back to you within 48 hours or less, but please note that justholdingstill, casthewise, and pray4jensen/60r3d0m are heading out on a mini vacation to Vancouver Island from June 30 to July 4 so you might not hear from us as promptly at that time! Unfortunately we won’t have cell service or WiFi.

Aside from this, thank you again for your patience and support. We can’t wait to see photos of your books (and shelves and pets and plants!). Be sure to tag us when you do post!

With love,

Your TH+B mods

#admin: 60r3d0m #admin: pray4jensen #announcement #tohellandbackanthology

[losingitinjersey]

For as much as I was dreading this past week, it really went as well as possible.  

My week included the following:  

A first time in-home daycare visit

An 18 month pediatrician appointment

A first time daycare drop-off

32 week OB appointment.  

Girlfriend hangout / pedicure / all the errands. 

So much driving and socializing! 

On Tuesday, erp and I went and spent 40 minutes at the in-house daycare getting to know the woman and see her space.  There were about four other kids there, all various ages, and after 10 minutes of erp being shy she actually started coming out of her bubble and playing with the kids! Maybe she’s not as shy as I thought!  So so encouraging to see my little covid babe interacting with others.  She actually seemed bummed to leave!  

Wednesday, erp and I drove the hour into Norfolk for her pediatrician appointment which went overall well!  For as vocal and communicative as erp is, she still hasn’t said any words yet so we’ll be starting speech therapy soon.  Not concerned at all and happy to get the assistance! 

Thursday was my OB appointment to which I had to find the childcare coverage for.  Tuesday’s initial daycare visit made going into this drop-off so much less anxiety riddled.  Sure, I still didn’t love leaving my child somewhere but I trusted she’d be fine.  And she was!  My appointment was a success too!  This new OB office (because I moved) has such a nicer team of professionals working there.  I was honestly expecting someone to say something about my weight since it’s exploded due to my eating like a jerk (even though I vowed this pregnancy not to. Wrong!) but all she said was that my “numbers looked good!”  AMAZING.  She even checked to see if I was dilated due to my request after convincing myself I was thanks to @shaketheduust :) (I am not dilated and am “as closed as closed can be!”)  

When my appointment was over I texted the daycare lady to let her know I’d be back in 15 minutes and she told me to take my time, run an errand or get some alone time.  I replied that I didn’t know how to do that.  So I did the only thing I could think of, went through the Starbucks drive-through and called my mom to give her a low-down of the appointments.  Half an hour later I was on my way to get my girl and she looked like she was having such a great time! Though, once she saw me she immediately ran up to me, asked to be picked up and was ready to go.  I received tons of pictures and videos throughout the two-hour stint giving me a play-by-play of her experience there.  So so grateful to have found such a great resource!  

At the OB office I was able to schedule my next 9 weeks of appointments (once every two weeks for the next four weeks then weekly after that) so I was able to book them on days that either Kevin has off or my mom will be here to watch erp.  Despite having childcare lined up I asked the daycare lady if we could find time for erp to start going to her one or two+ days a week to help her continue to socialize and integrate with others.  It feels strange to do this knowing I don’t need the childcare, but I need to remember that this isn’t about what I need, it’s about what’s best for erp.  And right now, having time outside the house and with others will be really good for her.  

Friday was blissfully spent at home, though I did spend 3 hours on video calls chatting/hanging with co-workers which is always a great time!  Love that my work day can include so much @zerocarb time.  

Saturday morning I was out the door by 7:45 a.m. to drive to Norfolk to hang out with friendbor! (even though we’re not neighbors anymore, that’s forever how she will be referred).  We got Starbucks breakfast before our 10 a.m. pedicure appointment and enjoyed our final 1:1 hangout before she and her family move to Norway next month!  It was so so good to spend time with her and catch up on all the things!  I then took advantage of the solo afternoon by running all the errands (returning Amazon products, going grocery shopping, getting gas, grabbing lunch from two different spots, running to the post office).  I was exhausted by the time I got home and spent the rest of the day trying to recover from all the activity.  

Phew. Such a busy week that was!  Looking forward to next week since it’s the last week before work is giving the company the next week off!  Woohoo!  Here’s to relaxing the rest of the day (or doing the things we need to do like put together baby August’s crib. We’ll see if that happens).  

#please don't reblog #week recap #I need to start posting more frequently so my posts aren't so long #momblr #18 months #pregblr #33 weeks

[after-witch]

After-Witch Masterlist

My masterlist! Will be updated regularly. Please note yandere content will contain the ‘Yandere’ descriptor before a character.  Content is broken up by fandom, with headcanons listed at the bottom of each category. Multi-part pieces will be noted [Complete] when they are finished.

[Hopefully these links will work on desktop and mobile... if not I will work on a Google Doc version!]

Updated 04/28/21

Boku no Hero Academia/My Hero Academia

Birthday Gift: Part 1 - Part 2  [Yandere Overhaul x Reader] [Complete]

You finally get up the nerve to ask your captor for a special gift–a birthday gift.

Bad Day [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]

You’re in one of your dark moods again. Overhaul wants to help you. 

Just One Night [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]

You really, really want to go see The Nutcracker. Will your captor grant your request to continue an annual tradition? 

Damned to Live Forever [Yandere Vampire Aizawa x Reader]

You fall prey to the whims of a vampire with a penchant for lost, helpless souls.

Don’t Fall Asleep [Yandere Dream Demon Dabi x Reader]

You can’t stop dreaming about a terrible man with scars. You’ll be okay--if you can just stay awake.

Takeout [Yandere Dabi x Reader]

You haven’t been eating. Your captor brings home takeout.

Just a Name [Yandere Dabi x Reader]

Dabi wants a name, that’s all. Things will be easier if you give it to him.

So Close [Yandere Hawks x Reader]

You ran and ran from Hawks and came... so close.

So Far [Yandere Hawks x Reader]

Sequel to ‘So Close.’ Hawks realizes he has to break you down to build you back up.

Vacation All I Ever Wanted [Yandere Hawks x Reader]

You agree to visit Japan with a friend for vacation, despite it being home to your controlling ex-boyfriend.

Threats and Lies [Yandere Shigaraki x Reader]

Your bratty behavior inspires threats and lies from your captor. Inspired by the prompt “I could kill you if I wanted to.”

Be Good to Him (The Boy!AU Shigaraki x Reader]

You’re a nanny responsible for the well-being of a doll-turned-ghost. You want to leave, and Tomura really doesn’t like that.

Birdsong [Yandere Shigaraki x Reader]

A rare outdoor picnic leads you to temptation. Inspired by the prompt “Don’t you dare fucking try it. You know you can’t outrun me.”

Adoration and Pain [Vampire!Yandere Overhaul x Reader]

You are his pure doe, his precious lamb. And his personal blood bank.

Let’s Split Up, Gang [Yandere Hawks x Reader]

You have a stalker. Thankfully, your boyfriend Hawks is there to help you investigate.

Mortality [Yandere Dabi x Reader]

Dabi muses on mortality after a hard day. For request: “Uhshh for the horror movie special I thought the quote “Fire is the reflection of or own mortality, we’re born, we breathe, and we die” from “Get Out” would work super well with dabi.”

Doctor Doctor [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]

You’re afraid of doctors, which naturally means it’s time for your checkup.

Down the Drain [Yandere Dabi x Reader]

You and Dabi have a little... chat in the bathroom. For request: yandere dabi x fem reader.

White Picket Fence [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]  

[Part 2]

You’ve been with Kai Chisaki for three years. Your life is quiet and cozy and soothing. But what do you do when you realize you want more? For request: yandere overhaul x reader with stockholm syndrome

Pluck [Yandere Hawks x Reader]

You tried to run–no, fly–away. And Hawks is going to make sure you never try that again.

Sweet Dreams [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]

Overhaul watches you sleep and has an… unexpected reaction.

Big City [Yandere Shigaraki x Reader]

You’re about to leave for a new university in a new city in a new country. Your friend doesn’t seem pleased. You agree to meet up before you leave in the hopes of keeping your friendship alive.

It’s My Party [Yandere Shigaraki x Reader]

You’re having a party and Shigaraki is not invited.

You Would Cry Too (If It Happened to You) (It’s My Party Part 2) [Yandere Shigaraki x Reader]

Quality Time (It’s My Party Part 3)

Shigaraki won’t let you go to the bathroom.

Office Hours [Yandere Shigaraki x Reader]

He gave you the outfit. The blouse, the skirt, the nylons–the heels. A secretary’s unofficial uniform. You can’t help but feel mocked, in a way. Hurt. Was he being cruel on purpose, to make you think about your life before all this?

Thank You For Your Donation [Yandere Shigaraki x Reader]

For request: “ Shigaraki gets obsessed with a twitch stream and deluded himself into believing they’re together until he finally takes her home “

Sketch Memory [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]

Chisaki lets you indulge in your little hobbies. But he’s starting to suspect that you’re taking advantage of his “generosity.”

Fragile Little Thing [Yandere Hawks x Reader]

Your “boyfriend” is having a rough day and he doesn’t appreciate you being such a difficult partner. If you can’t behave, maybe he can’t behave, either.

Revelations [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]

So you don’t eat, you don’t follow his rules; so you hurt yourself. It’s all you can do to keep up the fight against an obsessive captor who thinks he knows what’s best for you.

Sweet Escape [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]

Escape isn’t easy. Nor is it very long-lasting. When Overhaul’s men drag you back into captivity, you brace yourself and wait for what your captor will do with you.

Comfy Couch [Yandere Hawks x Reader]

It’s fine if you’re not paying attention to Netflix, really. But not paying attention to your boyfriend? That won’t fly.

Corsets and Blackmail [Yandere Dabi x Reader]

Dabi wants you in a corset. What Dabi wants, lately, Dabi gets.

Baby Mine [Yandere Overhaul x Reader] 

Rest Your Head (Baby Mine Part 2) 

Close to My Heart (Baby Mine Part 3)

Never to Part (Baby Mine Part 4)

The first time you laid eyes on your child, you knew: You had to get out. Set in the ‘White Picket Fence’-verse.

Serpent [Naga!Yandere Overhaul x Reader]

You’re so lucky to have wandered into his den. Others might have eaten you, but he’ll keep you safe.

Pinned [Yandere Shigaraki x Secretary!Reader]

Follow up to Office Hours. You’ve given him a kink and isn’t that your fault, really?

Headcanons

Yandere Overhaul and a darling with chronic health problems

Yandere Overhaul General Headcanons

Yandere Aizawa General Headcanons

Yandere Dabi and a depressed darling

Yandere Hawks General Headcanons

Yandere Dabi and a depressed, clingy darling

Yandere Overhaul with a darling who has EDS

Yandere Shigaraki and a darling who doesn’t mind being kidnapped

Yandere Overhaul with a darling who hates mornings

Yandere Shigaraki + Secretary!Reader Headcanons

Yandere Shigaraki and secretary musings

Yandere Overhaul with pregnant reader headcanons

Bungou no Stray Dogs

With Friends Like These [Yandere Dazai x Naive Reader]  

One of your friends thinks your new boyfriend is controlling. Your new boyfriend doesn’t like that at all. 

Dinner Party [Yandere Fyodor Dostoevsky x Reader]

Your friends cancelled, one by one, leaving you with the only person in the world who seemed to care about you.

Flight [Yandere Nikolai Gogol x Reader]

You’re a fantastic actress when you’re on the stage. But your captor isn’t fooled when there’s no stage magic to hide your real feelings.

Character Development [Yandere Fyodor Dostoevsky x Reader]

You’ve been given a gift by your captor for good behavior. Too bad it’s a shitty book.

Headcanons

Yandere Dazai with an oblivious and nurturing reader

Yandere Dazai and Chuuya with a darling that has post-punishment nightmares

Yandere Dazai and Chuuya general headcanons

Death Note

Oh Sugar Sugar: Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 [Yandere L Lawliet x Reader] [Complete]

You’re the owner of a cute little pastry shop. One of your customers falls in love with more than just your baked goodies.

Darling, Light of My Life [Yandere Light Yagami x Reader]

Inspired by a scene from The Shining. You found the book. He wants it back.

A Christmas Interlude [Yandere L Lawliet x Reader]

Set in the Oh Sugar Sugar series. It’s Christmas--and you have a gift coming. Deleted scene here.

Ginger Tea [Yandere L Lawliet x Reader]

You’re sick. Unfortunately, your captor has no intentions of leaving you alone to recover.

Sunny Day [Yandere l Lawliet x Reader]

He knew there was a high chance that your reaction to being kidnapped could end with depression. But what he didn’t know was how, exactly, to deal with it.

Final Fantasy 7

Compound [Yandere Sephiroth x Reader]

After being caught trying to escape, Sephiroth punishes you.

A Private Cell [Yandere Reno x Reader] 

Part 2

For request:  Can I request FF7 Reno with reader as his prisoner?

No Turning Back [Yandere Sephiroth x Reader]

It’s hard, being with Sephiroth–belonging to Sephiroth. Especially when your own heart belongs to another.

Headcanons

Yandere Kadaj General Headcanons 

Yandere Yazoo General Headcanons

Yandere Vincent Valentine with shy female reader Headcanons

Hetalia 

Wine? [Yandere Spain x Reader]

You “settle” in for dinner. Inspired by the prompt “I’m sorry, I know it hurts.” 

Cold [Yandere Canada x Reader]

You ran away and that’s not good. Inspired by the prompt “I’m sorry, I know it hurts.”

Under a Bridge [Yandere Norway x Reader]

You’ve been under Norway’s thumb, trapped and caged in more ways than one. You seek help from otherworldly beings, but a deal once made, can’t be undone.

Headcanons

Yandere America General Headcanons

Yandere Japan General Headcanons

Yandere Canada General Headcanons

Yandere Denmark General Headcanons

Yandere Iceland General Headcanons

Inu Yasha

Moving On [Yandere Sesshoumaru x Reader]

You misspeak when instructed by the demon lord who’s taken you. Inspired by the prompt “I didn’t quite hear that, care to repeat yourself?”

You Can Run [Yandere Sesshoumaru x Reader]

For request:  “Could you maybe do something with Sesshomaru? Maybe his ‘darling’ trying to escape not knowing that it would literally be impossible?”

A Gift [Yandere Sesshoumaru x Reader]

Your demon lord captor presents you with an unusual and unexpected gift.

In Sickness [Yandere Sesshoumaru x Reader]

You were not often alone with the demon lord who took you captive. Then again, you were not often touched by the demon lord who took you captive, either.

Knives Out

Yandere Ransom Drysdale Imagine

Imagine meeting Ransom Drysdale...

Hook Line and Sinker [Yandere!Ransom Drysdale x Reader]

You’ve broken up with Ransom Drysdale, and you mean it this time. But the freedom that comes with the breakup leads to a series of unexpected coincidences that leave you wondering: was it worth the price?

Yandere Ransom Drysdale Headcanon

Sticking up for Ransom at a family dinner.

Emotional Loan [Yandere Ransom Drysdale x Reader]

You shouldn’t be this nervous about telling your boyfriend that you want to transfer to a college out of state. Ransom is nothing if not generous with you–so why is your stomach in knots?

Labyrinth

The Pain Sweeps Through [Yandere Jareth x Reader]

You’re not the first one he’s brought into the Goblin King’s Labyrinth. You’re not the first one to best him, to get to the center and beat him at his own game. But you are the first one to beat him and give in: “Fear me, love me, do as I say and I will be your slave.

Misc Horror Movies

Kim So-Hee x Reader Headcanons (Wishing Stairs)

The Slayers

Yandere Xelloss Headcanons

Trigun

Yandere Knives x Reader Headcanons

Original/No Fandom

Wife or Death  [16th Century Witch POV]

You’re a 16th century witch who finds herself pursued through the woods by a witchfinder. Out of options, you pray to the only lord that might save you.

Floss [Yandere Dentist x Reader]

You hate going to the dentist. You really do.

In the Mirror [Doppelganger x Reader]

She just wants to make your life better. Of course, that’s hard to believe when you’re trapped inside a mirror.

And Home Before Dark [Wendigo x Reader]

Living in the practical wilderness of new France, you knew you were never meant to be in the woods after dark. After all, there was something in the forest that was dark and dangerous and it wanted you.

Madame Guillotine [18th Century Aristocrat Reader]

It’s the French Revolution and you’re a former aristocrat on your way to meet your death at the scaffold.

Down the Cellar Stairs [Early 20th Century Reader]

It’s just a game, just a silly game to play on Halloween. But you may find more at the bottom of the cellar stairs that you bargained for.

#afterwitch masterlist #yandere #horror

[bitchapalooza]

I posted 2,141 times in 2021

1499 posts created (70%)

642 posts reblogged (30%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 0.4 posts.

I added 3,980 tags in 2021

#hetalia - 1314 posts

#hetalia incorrect quotes - 634 posts

#incorrect hetalia - 631 posts

#hetalia headcanons - 297 posts

#hetalia america - 250 posts

#hetalia romano - 178 posts

#hetalia south italy - 176 posts

#rambles - 172 posts

#hetalia england - 170 posts

#hetalia north italy - 158 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#nordic kitty playdates are always hosted at norway's bc norway cant get steinn's fat fucking ass in the car without someone else's help 😂

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

America headcanons

• Joined the circus once. He was a clown of course.

• His biggest dream is to fly a blimp.

• Owns two Alexas to prove it to everyone the government is spying through them.

• Has a framed dollar bill in his home office. He won't tell anyone why, just that no one is allowed to touch it.

• Owns a box set of Family Guy DVDs just to burn them once the show finally ends.

• Only magic he's capable of doing is the continuous handkerchief trick. This thoroughly disapoints England.

• Surprise visits Germany every month at a randomly selected date because besides England he's the easiest to pester.

• Is convinced the White House is haunted by Martha Washington's ghost. Forwhatever reason why no one is sure.

• Also convinced he saw Elvis at Walmart once.

• Dad jokes. He's got them memorized.

• Speaking of dad, he dresses like one.

• The type to have cheesy and really bad novelty mugs that barely uses.

• Legally required to finish singing "I want it that way" after starting.

• Back in the 90s he made goat cheese for a living.

• Please don't make him say "its right here" or "over there". Stop making fun of him when he says it like "its righ' heyuh" and "ovah theruh" :(

• He's teaching Russia how to skateboard. It's going as well as one would expect....

• Orders sxx toys in bulk and sends them to France's [government] office; the only place he desperately tries to be professional at.

• Every gift giving opportunity he ALWAYS gives England a cookbook.

• Passive aggressively does his paperwork. There is no other way he does it.

• Owns a bouncy house. Blows it up and jumps in it when he's sad.

• Claims he's in a cult. Is actually stuck in a time share.

• Owns a police light that he puts on his car when he gets a call concerning nation business. He does the wee-woo sound himself.

• Always wins the ugly Christmas sweater contests.

• A real pro at Hungry Hungry Hippos but strangely sucks at Solitare.

• Do not bother him at 1AM. That's his eat peanut butter straight from the jar and play splatoon time.

• By the state of California he can legally officiate a wedding. Well anyway that's how he officiated a wedding for a couple of dogs and how technically it's legal because he might have given those dogs not only American citizenship but also social security numbers and everything else. Who gave this man access to these things!?

• Signed China up for a dating website intended for the single elderly.

• His favorite ice cream may be butter pecan but he'll always say the best flavor is cookie dough.

• Makes his own butter. Does not call it butter. Calls it smooth milk.

240 notes • Posted 2021-01-01 23:30:51 GMT

#4

You cannot tell me Veneziano Italy has weak legs. The fucker has some raw ass sterdy spaghetti legs, not limp cooked spaghetti legs. He runs a lot. And you also cant tell me he doesnt have some muscle built up in his arms after what training Germany does manage to get him to do.

Other than a satanic ritual gone wrong, how else do you think these are possible???

286 notes • Posted 2021-03-06 02:09:26 GMT

#3

Veneziano: I hate being old.

Germany: Old? You're, what? 500 at least? Doesn't seem that old to me, at least in a nation sense anyway. *takes sip of coffee*

Veneziano: Germany. I'm 3000 years old.

Germany: *chokes on coffee*

338 notes • Posted 2021-06-09 13:02:34 GMT

#2

I kinda hate it when Japan is ALWAYS written to be polite??? Let him be a fucking jerk for once like most of humanity damn--

348 notes • Posted 2021-07-03 16:11:39 GMT

#1

Germany handing out gold stars to those who stay fucking quiet during meetings. Greece has the most.

558 notes • Posted 2021-07-15 16:48:19 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[lost-in-the-80s]

Winter Memories pt. 2

Pairing: Axl Rose x reader

Words: 3,156k

Summary: The pressure of making a new album is finally hitting Axl. To get rid of some stress he decides to take a trip to Norway, however, he did not expect to meet a mysterious woman there.  (smut + fluff)

A/N: I am back with part two!! Let me know if you liked it! Sorry it took me so long! There will be some lines in norwegian again, the translations will be below in italics.

Warnings: Mature content, swearing and unprotected sex. (Use a condom, guys!) ​​

Tag list: @roger-taylors-car​​ @ladieswttda​ @teasid​ @metalheartofgold​ @slashscowboyboots​ @ginny-rose-sixx​  @rumoured-whispers​ @normatural​ add yourself to my tag list :)

Tagging who showed interest for a second part: @sugwinter​​ @vinylvintage​​ @fosterchild-3203​ @littlemisscare-all​​ @ultrabithc​

Part 1

A year passed after that weekend. December arrived and Y/N got ready to spend another weekend at Anna's cottage.

As she packed her bags, she couldn't stop thinking about Axl, the mysterious redhead she had met the year before. He never left her mind, not even for a day.

But finding him would be impossible, so she ignored her heart's pleas that begged her to go to the United States to look for him. Her best chance was to hope he was in the cottage.

During the flight to the mountains, anxiety washed over her body. It was the longest two hours of her life. Her stomach was full of butterflies, as the memories of that night filled her mind.

Taking a taxi she asked the driver three times to go faster, ignoring the fact that the track was slippery with snow.

As soon as she reached the cottage she strode toward the front door, hoping to see him already waiting for her. But he wasn’t there.

After asking Anna she was sure, he wouldn’t come. His name wasn’t on the schedule list, nor had been since that weekend in December.

Han må ha gått videre med livet sitt, og du fortsetter å tenke på ham. She thought to herself.

He must have gone on with his life and you silly keep thinking about him.

Y/N tried to stick to her routine schedule, but spending twenty minutes on a bus to go skiing seemed too tiring. So she spent the entire Friday in her room, reading and whining about her life.

The next morning she woke up late and walked slowly down the steps. She had decided to have breakfast and go back to the airport, catch a flight to Oslo and try to forget all of that. Staying at the cottage brought too many memories to her mind.

“God morgen, Anna” She said calmly.

"Good morning, Anna."

“God morgen Y/N" The lady replied smiling.

"Good morning, Y/N."

Looking at all the breakfast options, she just couldn't feel hungry, so she took a big mug of coffee and sat at a table, sighing when she realized she had sat at the same table he was at the previous year.

After a few minutes, Anna came over, pulling the chair across from her to sit down.

"Hva skjer, Y/N?" The lady asked, touching the younger woman’s hand on top of the table.

"What's going on Y/N?"

“Det er ingenting, Anna, du trenger ikke å bekymre deg.” She gave a weak smile.

"It's nothing, Anna, you don't have to worry."

"Det er ikke gutten?"

"It's that boy, isn't it?"

Y/N looked out the window, avoiding the lady's gaze.

"Han så veldig trist ut dagen han reiste."

"He looked really sad the day he left."

She looked at the lady, seeing compassion in her eyes.

“Ikke bekymre deg, Anna. Jeg klarer meg. ” She smiled, trying to look convincing.

"Don't worry, Anna, I'll be fine."

----

During the next two years, she improved. She focused on work and was able to be distracted from her own thoughts.

She had a few boyfriends during that time, but she couldn't help comparing them to the redhead, and given his color and brilliance, all the others became gray and opaque.

During the nights, his face appeared in her dreams, they were always together and happy and she hated waking up every day and knowing that it would never go beyond that, a dream.

Sometimes she could even go a week without thinking about him, but then something simple reminded her again. Like when she wore the sweater she was wearing that night.

She felt stupid, it was ridiculous to feel that way after so long, especially for someone she only met for a weekend. But every time a rock song played on the radio, she remembered him.

He had said he worked with rock and she always wondered what he meant by that. Was he a band manager? Or was he a member of one of the bands that had already crossed her ears? She would never know and maybe it was for the best.

"Y/N!"

The sound of her name made her look up from the papers she was signing.

It was Hanna. She had moved from the United States to Norway the previous year, working in the office's accounting. The two became close very fast and today they were best friends.

"Hanna..." She looked up smiling.

“Guns n Roses will be playing here in June!! I can't believe it, I thought I would never see them live again! ” She gave little leaps of joy.

"Hmm that’s great, I'm happy for you," Y/N said, smiling at the girl one more time before going back to work. She didn't listen to much music so going to concerts and festivals was not quite her style.

"Come with me?" She crouched down in front of the table.

"Oh I don't know, you know I don't like these crowded places."

"Please. I don't want to go alone. ” She made puppy eyes, staring at Y/N.

"Do not look at me like that!" She pointed her index finger, but Hanna was persistent. "Ah, fine, I'll go with you!" She gave in.

"Yess!!" Hanna celebrated as she stood up doing a victory dance.

Y/N started laughing, making the girl stop.

"What's it?"

She pointed with the pen. Looking back, Hanna saw her boss shaking his head as he looked in her direction.

"Shit!" She scratched the back of her neck, sitting on the chair in front of Y/N’s table. "Do you think he's going to fire me?"

"No ... but he'll think twice before inviting you to the Christmas party this year." She giggled a little.

"Thank God..." She breathed a sigh of relief.

"What day will the concert be?" Y/N asked, going back to signing papers.

“June 10th. I'm going to buy tickets today after work, I'll bring yours tomorrow.”

Hanna looked like a child when she was happy, which always relaxed Y/N's serious mood.

"All right." She prolonged the first word, writing the day on a post-it note.

---

June 10th arrived and Hanna made sure they arrived two hours ahead to get a spot close to the stage.

Wearing denim shorts and a black T-shirt, she accompanied Hanna across the field until she reached the edge of the stage. At least she would be able to see the show up close.

The hot afternoon sun went down and a cool breeze came with the night, but Y/N's irritation didn’t fade away. The band was almost an hour late for the concert and every few minutes someone was bumping into her, making her wish she had stayed at home.

The stage lights came on and a guy with black curly hair came on stage, playing a riff that sounded wonderful to her ears.

Kanskje jeg vil glede meg over denne konserten. She thought to herself

Maybe I’ll enjoy this concert.

Soon the rest of the band members appeared and she became convinced that it would be a good show. That's until the vocalist entered the stage.

He was wearing tight white shorts and a leather jacket, his hair in a red bandana and her heart missed a beat.

Her mouth was slightly open and she put her hand on her chest, to make sure her heart was still beating.

It was him. Axl. The guy from the cottage.

He funnily ran and danced around the stage and his voice sounded so different from what she remembered. But there was no doubt, it was him.

"What's it?" Hanna screamed near her ear when she saw that her friend was not moving.

"It's him!"

"Who?"

"The guy from the cottage!"

She had told Hanna about the event, although she had never mentioned his name.

"Axl Rose??" Hanna's eyes widened, looking from Y/N to Axl and to Y/N again. "Holy shit!"

For the rest of the concert, Y/N couldn't take her eyes off of him anymore. But he hadn't noticed her. They were on the side and he spent more time in the center.

But then the guitar solo started and the same guy from the beginning took over from Axl, who started to leave the stage.

He was smiling, laughing at something and then his eyes shifted to the right and he saw her. The smile disappeared completely from his face and stopped walking.

The two stared at each other for a few seconds before he walked over to the edge, making the fans next to Y/N scream out of control.

"Good to see you." He smiled, lowering himself in front of her.

She nodded, smiling, not being able to form words.

Fans around her started trying to push her to get closer to him, the screams making it impossible for her to understand what he had said.

He could tell by her face that she didn't understand, pointing sideways with his thumb and making a sign with his fingers that meant later.

"Backstage later." He spoke again and she could read his lips, finally managing to assimilate the information.

She nodded quickly, giving him a thumbs up.

After the solo, the band played a few more songs before finishing. At every chance he got, Axl came over to her, singing while looking into her eyes, making a huge smile come over her lips.

When the show was over she pulled Hanna by the hand, heading backstage. Where a security guard at the entrance made her stop.

"Hi, I'm Y/N, Axl is waiting for me." She said with a small smile.

"Identification, please."

"She showed him the concert ticket."

"This is the common ticket, I’m sorry Y/N, but you can’t pass."

"Wait! Y/N? ” A man in a red button-down shirt appeared behind the security guard. "Are you Y/N?"

She nodded.

"Let her in, Axl wants to talk to her."

"What about this one?" He pointed to Hanna.

"She’s with me!" Y/N said, taking her friend's hand.

"Let her in too."

The security guard made room, letting the two pass.

"Come, this way." He started walking down several corridors. "I'm Doug Goldstein, by the way." He turned for half a second offering them a small smile.

"We're here," he said after almost a minute of walking.

Opening the door there was a spacious room with several couches, all the members of the band were there, except him. There were other women in the room, some on the lap of the band members.

"They are groupies." Hanna whispered in Y/N's ear.

"What is it?"

"They like rockstars, travel with bands and sleep with them."

Y/N nodded, understanding what she meant. "Lucky for them, they are very cute."

"Aren’t they?" She laughed softly.

"Hey, I saw you two at the gig!" A tall, blond guy said getting closer.

"Oh my God, Duff McKagan noticed me during the gig!" Hanna said, putting her hand on her forehead as if she was going to pass out.

Duff laughed.

"And you are?" He offered his hand for them to shake.

"My goodness!!" She gave a little squeak. "I'm Hanna and this is Y/N." She shook his hand. "I shook Duff McKagan's hand!!" She looked at Y/N. "Do you believe? Me?" Hanna pointed to herself.

Y/N and Duff laughed.

"Is she always that excited?" He asked as he shook Y/N's hand.

"She is a huge fan." She said laughing.

"I am! I am! I even have a T-shirt signed by Slash. I paid

200 bucks on it.” She said the last part with a little remorse for the money spent.

"We can get you another one, I can ask the guys to sign it for you." He smiled a little and Hanna smiled, nodding quickly.

“So you are the famous Y/N! Axl has talked about you for years! ”

Before she could answer she heard his voice saying her name.

Looking to the side, Axl was standing in the hall, wearing only his shorts while a towel was slung over his shoulder.

Det forblir varmt. She thought.

He’s still hot.

He nodded, indicating that she should follow him, so she did.

After a few steps, Axl stopped, opening a door that had his name written on it, and letting her in first. As soon as he closed the door, her lips were glued to his.

Their kiss was hot as summer rain and urgent as if they only had a few seconds to do it. Her hands touched his face, bringing him closer, while his hands infiltrated in her hair, gently pulling the strands at the top of her neck.

A small moan left her lips and he smiled during the kiss, pulling away just long enough to say, "God, how I missed that sound."

He moved his hands to her waist, starting to walk farther into the room, taking her with him.

"Axl." She sighed his name when their lips parted.

He moved away from her a few inches as he stroked her face with his right hand, the left one remaining on her waist, keeping her close.

"Fuck, you haven't changed a thing." He looked at every detail on her face, as if he wanted to memorize it.

"I missed you." She smiled, touching his face.

Axl closed his eyes, focusing on the feeling of her touch.

"I missed you so much, you have no idea." He opened his eyes, kissing her again.

The kiss grew hotter and when she realized Axl's hands were on the hem of her shirt. She lifted her arms, breaking and kissing and allowing him to remove the garment.

He let out a small growl in the kiss when she pulled his hair gently and he lowered his hands to her ass, squeezing her flesh before he propelled her upward.

Y/N intertwined her legs around Axl's waist and he started to move towards a sofa in the living room. He laid her down gently, removing his lips from hers just so that he could make a trail down her neck, slowly going into the valley between her breasts.

She moved her hands to her back, unclasping her bra and allowing Axl to enjoy her nipples. He took one of them to his mouth, sucking lightly by biting the skin while his fingers played with the other, causing a small moan to come out of her lips.

Y/N moved her hand towards Axl's shorts, feeling his already rigid erection over the fabric, making him moan and look her in the eyes. His gaze was filled with lust with a touch of malice, his pupils dilated.

Continuing his kisses to the south, Axl stopped at the waistband of her shorts, unbuttoning the garment and removing it from her body. His fingers caressed her core over her panties, making her gasp.

He slowly removed the last piece of clothing from her body, applying soft kisses to the extension of her leg, until the material was finally free and she was completely exposed to his gaze.

He stood up, removing his white shorts, tossing them on the floor before removing his sneakers in a hurry. He wore no underwear and the sight of his free and throbbing member made Y/N bite her lower lip while she sat down.

Axl climbed onto the couch, kissing her again. She moved her hands to his shoulders, pushing him to sit on the sofa, his back against the armrest when she climbed on his lap, making him smile mischievously.

Y/N touched his member, running its length a few times before collecting some of her juices with its tip and positioning it at her entrance.

Slowly she started to go down, keeping her gaze fixed on Axl's, she felt him fill her completely, letting a small moan leave her lips with the sensitivity.

She started with her movements, going up and down. Axl's hands found her hips, squeezing them firmly and guiding her movements until she reached a steady rhythm.

"Axl" She moaned his name, throwing her head back and allowing the sensation of pleasure to take over her mind.

"Fuck, you're so beautiful." He moved his lips to her now exposed neck, making her moan even more.

After a few minutes, Axl started to move his hips, meeting her movements, hitting her G-spot with strength and precision, making a loud moan leave her lips.

"Yes, moan for me, baby." He moved his thumb to her lips, allowing her to suck it, and he grunted at the sight.

"Axl ... I’m going to ..." Her breathing was rapid when she uttered the words between moans.

"I know baby. Cum to me. ” He said, moving his right hand to her clit, applying precise movements that made her moan even louder, if that was possible.

A cry with his name filled the room when she reached her peak, rolling her eyes and feeling her legs tremble with the wave of pleasure that spread through her body.

Axl's hands cupped her face, bringing her close to him as they continued to move. He enveloped her in a deep kiss and her hands tugged at his hair, knowing it was his weak spot.

"Oh, fuck." He groaned after a few minutes, parting their lips, but staying close enough that their noses would bump up every few seconds. "I love you." He said looking into her eyes, his thrusts becoming sloppier.

"I love you." She whimpered due to sensitivity, she could feel her walls tightening for another orgasm and she scraped his back with greed when a long moan left her lips and she closed her eyes.

“Fuck… Y/N.” It was all that Axl could say before they could both be hit by another orgasm, his jets filling her while her walls tightened his member, their juices mixing inside of her.

Sweaty and out of breath, all that could be heard in the room were their heavy breaths.

She leaned her forehead against his, holding his face with both hands as he hugged her.

"You don't know how much time I spent looking for you." He whispered.

She opened her eyes to meet his gaze.

"I hired a guy, but he never found you." 

She removed some locks of his hair away from his sweaty forehead. "I went back to the cottage the following year, but you weren't there."

"Shit, I was on tour." He giggled a little.

"When I was told we were going to play here, I couldn't help but hope that you would come."

"Well, I'm here now." She smiled sweetly, kissing his lips.

“Come to America with me? I don't want to be away from you anymore. ”

She stopped for a few seconds, thinking about his proposal.

"Please." He pleaded in a whisper.

Slowly she started to nod. “Yes, I will go with you! I don't want to be away from you anymore either. ”

The two smiled at each other before engaging in another passionate kiss, glad for finally being together again.

#harley writes #axl rose #axl rose fanfic #axl rose fic #axl rose x reader #axl rose imagine #guns n roses #guns n roses fanfic #guns n roses fic #guns n roses imagine #guns n roses x reader #gnr #gnr imagine #classic rock imagine #axl rose smut

[theexecutionerssong]

SKAM FRANCE BTS MASTERPOST

This is a master post of BTS anecdotes told in interviews, at cons, screenings and on social media. Don’t click the read more if you don’t want to lose some of the magic. I know sometimes knowing too much of how a show was shot can ruin it. Also, it’s very obvious that there was more promo starting around season 3 than for the first two seasons, don’t hold it against me. Feel free to message me if you think of something else as I must have forgotten a ton of things.

CASTING, REHEARSALS, BTS IN GENERAL

Skam France had the rights for the 4 seasons first but had to follow the original script almost to a T for the first 2 and if the audience was big enough then they would be allowed to distance themselves from OG

Skam France casted actors that were as close personality wise to their characters as possible, which made it easier for the cast to identify with their characters and made the friendships developping between the characters more believable since it was also developping off screen

They were not allowed to cast underaged actors who would have been closer to the real age of the characters due to the long hours of the shooting conditions

Most of the actors come from theatre and many had no or little previous experience with shooting for a camera before

The cast isn’t allowed to watch the clips before they air.

Most of the clothes they wear in the show are their own.

During rehearsals of the first seasons, Philippine went to the board with everyone’s names on it and wrote something funny next to Zoe’s name and wanted to send it to her but she messed up and published it on her ig stories, leaking the entire cast when it was still supposed to be a secret.

Lula’s first reaction when she got the script and “met” Daphné was “oh no I’m scared. I just want to slap her, she’s insufferable”

Assa almost didn’t audition for two reasons: the casting call didn’t specify they were looking for a woman of color and French casting calls almost always say whether they are specifically looking for a black woman. If it says nothing then they are usually looking for a white person. She thought she had no chance because of that. Second reason, after accepting the casting call, she did some research and found out OG Sana was from the Maghreb and she’s not. But her agent convinced her to go through with it, the only thing the skam france team wouldn’t negotiate was that they wanted a Muslim actress. There was no way they would have casted a non muslim actress/actor for Imane and Sofiane.

Skam France was the first TV show on French TV to have a black muslim  woman wearing a hijab as a main character

Paul, Robin and Axel knew each other before shooting, they’d met in Avignon.

Coline was still in her last year of high school when she shot the first two seasons.

Niels is the one who came up with a raccoon as Eliott’s spirit animal

They shoot about 15 minutes of usable content per day which is impressive (it’s usually 2-3 for movies released in theatres, 5-7 for TV programs)

When France TV told David the first two seasons were a success and they were renewing the show, he gave them a list of things he wanted to change so that he’d agree to come back to direct the next seasons, including a different camera, renewing the writers team (they included Niels), storylines, the ig content, etc. The new camera they got was a SONY Venice which allows them to play a lot with the focus/blur ratio and the cold and warm undertones, which made a major shift in the visual quality of seasons 3 and 4 compared to the previous 2.

David named Eliott after his son.

Having the teaser from Eliott’s POV was David’s idea. It’s the first remake to have a clip from the French Even’s POV

The bus stop from season 3 is fake, it doesn’t exist. It wasn’t even shot in Paris itself but in Saint Ouen.

Maxence didn’t watch OG - besides the towels in the bathroom clip - because he wanted to create his own Eliott without being too influenced, and he didn’t watch s1 and 2 of skam france either because he wanted Eliott to discover the characters without knowing their backgrounds.

Maxence wasn’t supposed to audition. He wanted to be done with his acting school before shooting anything but the head of the casting team came to watch a public class at his school and asked him to audition for Eliott at the end. David and Niels knew right away he was the one. Niels watched the audition tapes and was very impressed with another actor but within the first 3 seconds of watching Maxence, he knew it wouldn’t be anyone else. Maxence met Axel after the 3rd call back and they clicked right away. He’d broken his foot two days earlier so he was in crutches. They watched Even’s manic episode and had to improvise a similar scene but had to do with the crutches. They also went for a drink before shooting and they talked for hours, their connection was instantaneous. 

When he learned Maxence was cast, Axel went on his instagram and saw the model pictures and thought he was way too hot with the abs and everything and he himself would look like a potato during the nude scenes next to him. So he got a coach and for 3 months he trained and got on a very strict diet. He was disappointed that there were no shots where you could actually see his abs properly in Skam. He had also said months before that he had gotten a coach because before they started shooting seasons 3 and 4, he had met up with Marilyn to get advice on how to carry a season and she had told him to get a coach otherwise he wouldn’t be able to keep up with the pace. So what is the truth?

It leaked that Maxence was casted in July 2018 because someone on a Korean website recognized his shoes in an IG story from when he’d been spotted at the airport months earlier but it was kept mostly under wraps. Then his and Lais’s names leaked too a couple of months later but most people hadn’t seen his face before the trailer.

David asked Axel and Maxence to give up their phones and social media during the couple of months they were shooting to be really focused and not get distracted by the outside world and they mostly did. Axel bought an mp3 to still have music, he wrote “LUCAS ♥” on it with a white out pen. He created a playlist for Lucas, including songs like Run Boy Run and I love you by Woodkid, and To Build a Home by the Cinematic Orchestra.

Maxence’s process to get ready for a shot: he does yoga and dances a lot in the morning. he puts music on and paces a room while picturing himself standing on the edge of a cliff and if at some point he feels like falling and loses his balance, it means he’s got it. He asks that all the scripts he gets be printed on the right side of the page and on the left he takes notes about what the character is feeling through 7 different states: love, hate, fear, power, vulnerability, sex and i hate myself for not remembering the last one. To play a scene properly, you have to conjure up 4 states to create one emotion. He loves that David respects his method and is able to adapt to every member of the cast’s method. He also uses his body as a tool, for example if his character has to feel lonely or unsure, he will curl up into a ball for an hour without moving and then he’ll be in the right mindset because his body is telling him he’s isolated. That’s the method he used for Eliott, he created “lost scenes” that weren’t in the script, moments in between scenes with Lucas, to get more into Eliott’s mindset.

Maxence wrote a letter to Eliott, drew a picture of him, and spent hours adding notes to the script about his personality before even trying to get into his mind. 

There was a contest for the drawings in season 3. Maxence participated but didn’t get picked. Jeanne Lelièvre did!

All the social media content for seasons 3 and 4 were shot on the same day in December 2018 which is why you can see heavy winter clothing even when the content was published in May. For season 3, most ideas were Axel’s, and Maxence said no to 90%. 

While shooting for seasons 3 and 4, Axel was also on stage every night for theatre

To prepare for his role in s3, Axel watched CMBYN, Moonlight, and The Office 

They received more feedbacks from international fans than French ones at first. It was even a private joke between Niels and David, there were no comments in French on Youtube. Then the piano clip happened and David’s phone went crazy with notifications. He was in the editing room with Jérémy and the buzzing from his phone was non stop. They banned phones in the editing room after that.

Skam France owes part of its popularity to how accessible the cast and crew are, either on social media or IRL, with 6 entirely free events organized to get the fans and the cast and crew to meet, watch episodes together and have Q&As during seasons 3 and 4.

Skam France shooting locations have become extremely popular for the fans to hang out at and leave little mementos, to the point that the mayor of Paris has asked the team to pick completely untraceable locations, or make sure they are not in Paris itself for the next seasons

Skam France was the first remake to get renewed for 2 (possibly 4?) original seasons

Alexia and Daphné were supposed to have their own seasons they but couldn’t get the green light from Norway. He got the idea for Arthur’s story quite quickly after but they had to rework the scripts for seasons 5 and 6 a lot. Robin talked to David about his addiction to video games and how it could be a potential theme but in the end David chose deafness instead.

SEASONS 1 AND 2

It was Coline’s idea to make Alexia bi. There was a scene when Alexia mentions an ex boyfriend and she asked David “why wouldn’t it be a girl?” and his only reaction was “Ok. What’s her name?” and that’s how bi!Alexia was born.

It was also Coline’s idea to give Alexia’s colorful hair. She later regretted it because she had to bleach her hair twice to get the blue to stay and it fried her hair.

Assa’s worst memory of shooting s1 and 2 is when the girls have to carry Daphné, she kept dropping her and was afraid of hurting her.

Marilyn and Lula ruined the scene when the girls are having breakfast all together when they are on the countryside because they couldn’t stop laughing over carrots and the crunchy noise it was making. It was the last day of shooting and their nerves were all over the place.

SEASON 3

The first scene in the common room didn’t hit them that much, they didn’t realize the impact it would have because the whole shooting was just David yelling at them to look at each other then stop then do it again then stop etc

Nobody realized how big of an impact the “Moi c’est Eliott” line would have and then when they watched the clip, it was obvious.

The check de gang wasn’t scripted, it was Paul’s idea to make it a running gag. David wasn’t sure about it but after doing it just once, he was sold. Basile tripping over the bench was also Paul’s idea but he didn’t warn anyone he was doing it so Xavier started laughing and the camera was shaking so bad that they couldn’t keep it and had to reshoot the scene. They noticed during the editing process that Robin also tripped at the same time in the background during one take so they had to keep that one. 

Lucas playing the piano was Axel’s idea even though he didn’t know how to play properly. He sent a text to David at the end of June with different ideas for songs and David picked the most difficult one. He then practiced anytime he could until they shot the scene in october. It took him two months to learn it completely and then a little more to make it look easy.  (Niels later said it was his idea and that Axel was a cheeky little shit). Maxence had never heard Axel play the song before that moment so Eliott’s reaction is genuine. He didn’t think he’d manage to get in the right state of mind because the apartment was too small for the whole team and they were all very cranky, it was 3 am, but the moment he heard the first notes, he forgot all about it and was completely amazed.

The infiltration party: David asked that Basile pushes Daphné a bit, like shoves her out of the way when they have to run, but they hadn’t had the time to rehearse anything. After a couple of takes, Paul pushed Lula a bit too hard and she fell on her knees quite hard. He felt so bad because he never wanted to hurt her and they all had to take a half an hour break because her knees hurt. David after that was like OKAY NO MORE STUNTS EVER.

Axel got mad at the makeup department because the two lines on his face were not on the same place when they shot the outside scene and then once inside. He got so angry he could have cried that they wouldn’t believe him. So during the shooting he looked straight at the camera and wiped them away with the back of his hand to force them to draw the lines properly.

The first kiss scene: they had been shooting for 12 hours. It was raining intermittently all day so the team had to pack up the cameras often and wait it out when it was too much. They ran 4 hours late. They had a fake rain machine but no change of clothes so they could only shoot once. Below the bridge is not easily accessible, it’s a long path from the gate, so they used ropes to get things up and down from the bridge. They only had one shot. They had already shot kissing scenes but David was always telling them it had to be more passionate and kept yelling at them to use more tongue so for that shot they gave it their everything on the first (and only) take they did. 5 minutes later they were shooting the Remember scene.

They shot all the scenes in the colloc on the first week of shooting. Minute by minute was shot right before Samedi 9h17. They had to restart shooting samedi 9h17 four times because something wasn’t working between Axel and Maxence, they were clumsy and stressed. After taking 5 minutes to themselves with David to remind themselves of how pivotal the scene was, Axel and Maxence said they were ready and they shot the opening scene that made the cut.

The Phase de latence clip : Axel and Maxence felt like terrible actors because they had already shot all the big very emotional scenes and this was a bit tamer since Eliott doesn’t show much emotions. They felt that way about all the scenes shot in the school.

The Fête de trop clip: They shot the fight with the guys 8 times but it wasn’t enough for David until Robin slapped Axel on the 9th. After that they shot Chloé yelling at Lucas. Axel was still out of it due to the slap he’d gotten earlier that he hadn’t expected. At 3am, they finished with Lucas injuring his hands. Axel cracked the metacarpus in his hand and only told David two days later.

Leo has talked about the coming out bench scene and said Yann took it a bit too far and was too dramatic, he was like “i don’t know if i can say that… but c’mon… I mean. C’mon… that’s your best friend… who cares if he didn’t tell you right away, he had bigger problems on his mind, right?”He would have done it differently.

The “viens on n’en parle pas” scene was shot in 50 minutes in the middle of the night on the second day of shooting. Marilyn and Axel’s emotions were briming under the surface so it was one of the easiest scene to shoot.

The hardest scene to shoot for David in s3 was the intervention clip. It was the second day of shooting, the 4th clip of the day. Axel’s first take was not good enough and David was scared it would set the tone for the season. He had a stern talk with Axel. Thankfully, they shot a second time and it was the right one, everyone on set was crying and Axel was completely drained.  

The scene where they go get the couch from the creepy place is the one they shot last for season 3.

The paint scene: they only had one try. Axel and Maxence hadn’t shot together for a week, David had done it on purpose and they’d missed each other. It was shot on a Friday at the exact time it was supposed to happen IRL. The whole thing lasts 14 minutes long. David took their pants off because they were slipping too much. Xavier almost stopped filming he was like “is he serious? did he just take their pants off??”. They shot a part when one of them slips on the ground and the other follows but that didn’t make the cut. There were 25 people on set, everyone in a suit to protect from the paint, but Axel and Maxence forgot everyone and just got lost in their characters. When David yelled cut, Axel and Maxence didn’t hear him and kept making out. David had to separate them. Then they all were so happy that they yelled their joy but then saw all the people who were behind the camera, and everyone was crying, like they had witnessed something too intimate. They showered for an hour, emptied 2 bottles of soap and even then it wasn’t enough, Axel still had paint running down his neck at a party that evening. The music used on set was Dreamer, the Khlar remix. Maxence was upset it wasn’t the one they ended up using in the clip, it felt like a betrayal because it “wasn’t the song they had made love to”.

Maxence fought with the costume department over the briefs he was wearing in the paint scene, because they had shot the PONI scene first and he could remember which ones he was wearing for the PONI scene and he wanted to wear the same ones. He was sure people would notice.

The first scene Maxence ever shot was the PONI scene. 

The boat scene was quite special. It was a big moment for Maxence, he was extremely nervous, so David reduced the team on set as much as he could. Maxence got upset at Axel for being too present during the scene. Being used to a theatre stage, Axel is always a bit over the top, eating his ham with a flourish, stuff like that, but this was supposed to be Eliott’s big scene. Maxence asked for a break and told David that if Axel didn’t tone it down, he’d kill him. That also got resolved quickly. 

The Remember Me scene: the priest is Lula’s dad. Lula and Niels both make a cameo in the church. They forgot to warn Axel that a car was coming when he’s running so his reaction is genuine. He was running so fast, the minivan with the camera couldn’t keep up so they shot it twice. They shot Lucas finding Eliott under the bridge just after shooting the first kiss. Maxence only had 4 minutes to get into the right state of mind which was extremely challenging and during that time he had to change his clothes, dry his hair and redo his makeup. Axel wasn’t feeling very well, he was exhausted after having shot 4 clips that day, but David told him he could do it so he ran on the path to the bridge harder than ever (David thought he was going to hurt his sinews) and when he fell to his knees, he was close to passing out, you can actually hear when he says the first “t’es pas tout seul” that he’s about to throw up / can’t breathe properly. They only shot that part once and after it was done David told them they should hug each other because what they had just done with Lucas and Eliott was precious and a moment to remember.  

There was supposed to be a scene after the Remember scene but it was cut. Eliott is sleeping, Lucas brings him food and starts reading his book and then Eliott wakes up. They say hi, Eliott is confused about the time it is, it’s already late afternoon. He says he needs to leave, but Lucas tells him no. He keeps saying he has to go, he has to go to his parents. Lucas tells him it’s fine, they’ve been warned of where he is. But he says he’s got to leave anyway. Lucas asks him why he keeps insisting he needs to leave and Eliott tells him he just doesn’t want Lucas to see him like this. Lucas tells him he doesn’t mind. Then he starts teasing him, saying Eliott just wants to leave because he doesn’t want to own up to the fact that he lied to him. Eliott is confused. Lucas reminds him that he’d said there was no way he would ever be able to sleep next to a guy that hot (on the boat) and yet here they are actually taking naps. So Eliott must have lied to Lucas about finding him hot. Eliott says he’s an idiot and Lucas tells him that at least he’s not a liar at that what matters is that he is his idiot. “Congrats, you’re now the owner of an idiot… more or less hot” Eliott tells him he’s won and asks what they should do now. Lucas answers that they should start by saying hi properly and they kiss, and when they pull back they just look at each other whispering “salut”. Axel said he was upset at David for cutting the scene because it was so soft and intimate, he called him when he watched the episode to ask why he cut it, but it would have been too repetitive with the following Lundi 17h21 clip.

Lundi 17h21 is the second clip Maxence shot. Lucas’s “T’es beau quand tu rigoles” wasn’t scripted, Axel changed the script, he was supposed to say something about liking seeing Eliott smile.

The Je t’aime scene: the first shot they did was the most emotional one, it was one of the hardest scenes emotionally for Axel. He was crying so so much, he had tears and snot everywhere, and Maxence was just wiping it away so tenderly that David thought about keeping that shot but the snot was REALLY disgusting so they didn’t keep it. They shot it a few more times, except that then Maxence had to leave. So the shot of Lucas saying Moi aussi is actually to David. Axel said it didn’t feel weird because he does love David so it felt true.

SEASON 4

Assa sat down with the team before they wrote anything for the season and told them her whole life story. It lasted 4 hours and she cried when reading the script because they had included so many things she had told them, it felt like her and Imane were one.

Making Assa dance was Philippine’s idea. David asked her what she thought about when thinking of Assa, something that was really her and Philippine said “Dada, you should see her dance”

Moussa and Assa knew each other before since they had filmed together 5 years prior, a movie in which they already were siblings. They feel like siblings in real life.

The worst clip to shoot was on Lais’s first day of shooting, it was the bus clip. The shooting conditions were terrible, there was too much noise, and the crew was tired from having shot the 3 bus stop clips from season 3 earlier that day. David was convinced there would be nothing to save and they would have to rent another bus but the team worked their magic in post prod and it turned out amazing.

They shot the scene with Imane, Lucas and Eliott in class the day after Halloween. Maxence was at a party the night before and lost track of time. He had to take a taxi straight from the party to the set at 6am and showed up in full zombie costume and makeup.

Charles come back: it had been cloudy and raining all day but the moment the camera was on the girls’ faces, a ray of sunlight appeared and the wind blew in their hair, making it a real dramatic moment. Too good to pass on, it’s the shot they kept.

The fight between Lucas and Eliott that we vaguely hear in the background was just gibberish. Axel and Maxence hadn’t prepared anything and Axel just ended up shouting at Maxence things like YOU LIED TO ME BEFORE ABOUT LUCILLE YOU MIGHT BE DOING IT AGAIN ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE and Maxence NO I WOULD NEVER - BUT YOU DID - NO I WOULDN’T - YES YOU DID - NO and they kept going in circles so David was like “guys…. please, you might want to start screaming about something else or this is gonna sound very repetitive” but in the end we can barely hear anything so it didn’t matter much

When Alex comes to pick up Emma to go to the cinema, Assa had a break down and couldn’t stop laughing, hiding under a blanket and making all the girls laugh too with her. David had to scold them a bit to get them to stop.

Lais also ruined a clip by laughing for 15 minutes straight, it’s the clip at Imane’s house when they talk about the fair. It was the longest 15 minutes of the crew’s life. 

The oui oui song during Daphné’s birthday party wasn’t planned, the team just lost control of the cast. Axel started it and everyone followed. The cast are actually terrible extras. They are too dramatic and noticeable in the background so party scenes like Daphné’s birthday were a nightmare to shoot. 

Assa and Laïs rehearsed the Unknown dance clip every chance they got between every take, everyone kept tripping on them in the corridors.

The last sequences they filmed were actually the last clips at Imane’s house for the Eïd. Axel isn’t in the last shot because he had to leave for his play. He actually ruined the very last clip of season 4 by shouting his goodbyes to David from across the corner.

SEASON 5

The auditions for season 5 and 6 were held in June. Lucas was spotted through his youtube channel and asked to audition. 

Coline learned sign language by herself after an initiation class with the whole team. She started signing in July and has been practicing ever since. Robin took a one week class in September and then kept practicing by himself and with the D/deaf people on set. David and the rest of the team also took an initiation class.

Robin doesn’t like water and was anxious about the scenes in the pool. David got in the water with Xavier, Robin and Winona to reassure him and direct them better. They limited the number of extras around the pool because of that.

The place where Eliott works is where David used to work when he was younger.

Coline wrote a song for the season

They couldn’t leave the mural in the high school so they took it off the wall (it wasn’t actually painted on the wall itself) and cut it into pieces. There are a few pieces framed on the walls of Lucas and Eliott’s flat.

#skam france #skam france bts #gaelle parle

[wokeuptired]

wokeuptired’s masterlist

here are all the 1d fics i’ve ever written, organized in a nice rebloggable format! below the cut you will find 14 finished niall fics, 6 finished harry fics, a few liam stories, and one zayn for good measure. (my in-progress fics aren’t here. if i ever finish them, i’ll add them.)

see individual story pages for chapters, drabbles, photosets, banner credit, and more. 

thanks for letting me write in this world for so long, y’all. 

you can find my 5sos fics and other random bits here.

niall

screaming color

cole jacobs is pretty sure that niall horan is the worst thing that’s ever happened to her academic career.  but maybe he’s the best thing to ever happen to her, period. // uni au

you and i need to have a little patience

a screaming color sequel with lots of mushy relationship stuff and a pregnancy.

left my heart out

a uni au in which quentin is torn between liam, the boy with whom she’s been in a “friends with benefits” situation for ages, and niall, his rude roommate. 

13 versions of a heart 

Mim Marcus hasn’t written a word since the day Niall Horan broke her heart.

Niall, on the other hand, has done nothing but.

(a my-ex-is-a-writer-who-wrote-a-best-selling-novel-about-me au)

little giants 

a what-the-fuck-am-I-supposed-to-do-after-graduation au in which yessenia is a mess and niall’s the only stable thing in her life.

the other side of fear

a sort-of au in which cody burnett is the most famous pop star alive, and she’s living a lie, because no one knows she’s spent the past year falling in love with niall horan. 

warm blood

an au in which carver and niall share an anonymous kiss at an office christmas party and a desk after that, and exchange a lot of notes on post-its. 

look at me 

in which minna is a former child star who’s finally making the album she’s always dreamed of, except writer’s block is getting in the way—at least until she find’s niall horan’s song writing journal left behind in the studio. 

now that you know 

a cheesy valentine’s day story in which zanna’s got the hugest crush on her third most elusive flatmate. 

every perfect summer

finn’s trying to write a romance novel, and niall’s trying to make her live one.

boundless as the sea

bea’s absolutely not a romantic, much to the displeasure of her grandmother—and to niall, the bloke who’s agreed to help them find gram’s long-lost love. so much for bea’s vacation. 

same fools 

perhaps the silliest story i’ve ever written, a uni au in which lil spends 24 hours not sleeping and running into niall horan over and over. 

this mad mad love 

in which aiden doesn’t want to see her ex ever again, not even when he writes his whole new album about her.

fireworks over the freeway 

in one of my oldest and silliest, gemma meddles and harry causes trouble and there’s a school dance. 

the norway spruce 

a holiday story in which webber jones returns home for the holidays to find a new face wandering around the christmas tree lot. 

the panic cord 

a fluffy meet-cute in which gracie meets niall at a coffee shop and lots of fanfic cliches ensue. 

harry

the double plaid 

kit is a fashion designer’s assistant, but she wants to be a fashion designer, and harry is a lonely indie musician who wants to be less alone.

a history in rust 

jennah is an artist working on a graphic memoir about her semester abroad when her ex, the famous harry styles, shows up in LA to disrupt everything she’s built for herself since he broke her heart. 

you, the ocean, and me

an au in which ivy is hunkered down in her mum’s country house trying to finish her play, and harry is the boy next door who takes care of her mum’s garden when she’s out of town. 

the misfortune of knowing you 

a uni au in which darcy hates harry and harry hates darcy, except maybe things aren’t as they seem.

new lessons for old cynics 

kiernan is one of three sisters, and one third of a defunct indie group composed of said sisters. harry styles has always been on her radar, but now he’s closer than ever before. 

heliotropic 

an au in which anela is a surfer grieving the loss of her brother, and harry’s an out-of-towner who isn’t meant for hawaii, but is maybe meant to change anela’s life. 

liam

hiding places

robbie returns home after years away, and is surprised to find that her teenage love, liam, is back in town too. 

finger lengths

katie is liam’s best friend, and that might be something to brag about, except she’s secretly in love with him, and he’s never around. 

zayn

accidental sublime

the voice in joella’s head is the loudest thing about her, and the loudest thing about zayn malik is his tattoos. 

#1dff #one direction fan fiction #niall horan fan fiction #harry styles fanfiction

[stfudiscoinfernoed]

Use of Pansexual Timeline

1910s: A biography of Sigmund Freud shows “pansexualism” (defined as relating all human behavior and thoughts back to the sex instinct) was a term used in the early 1900s to criticize his work.

1963: A researcher studying Norway’s rat population notes sexual behaviors he describes as pansexual because “Their sexual behavior was indiscriminate in regard to the sex and age of the other individuals which they approached and mounted.” This use pansexual show up again in 1973, when a psychiatrist labels serial killer Alton Coleman as pansexual because he was “willing to have intercourse with any object - man, woman, child.”

1974: interview with Alice Cooper about his sexuality in which he mentions pansexuality (emphasis mine):

Interviewer: Aren't you even just a little bit bisexual? Alice: You mean do I mostly like girls, but do I like boys sometimes? No, I only like girls, but if I could have chosen my own sexuality, I think I might have chosen to be bisexual. I: Why is that? A: It would give me twice as many people to pick from! I: Do you really mean that? A: Sure - I think in the future everyone will be bisexual. And everything would be so much simpler then - you'd just make love with anyone you liked, and it wouldn't matter what sex they were, and maybe it also wouldn't matter what color they were, or what age, or anything, except that you liked them. I: How did you jump from bisexuality to these factors like race and age? A: Well, I actually prefer the concept of pansexuality, rather than bisexuality. The prefix "pan" means that you're open to all kinds of sexual experiences, with all kinds of people. It means an end to restrictions, it means you could relate sexually to any human being, it means and end to unreal limits. I like that idea.

1977: A Washington Post article calls singer-song writer Peter Allen’s appeal “pansexual” because he has both a large female and gay male followings. In fact, this definition of pansexual “holding widespread appeal to people of a variety of genders, sexualities, interests and preferences” was pretty common up until the early 2000s. See: 1994 Chicago Tribune on Keanu Reeves, 1995 Hartford Currant article on Ricky Martin

1982: Rita Mae Brown tells People Magazine she was kicked out of university in 1963 for her pansexuality:

“I was open to loving anybody" An officer of her sorority called her in and said, “White ladies aren’t seen with ‘n*gras.’ Would you want to marry one?” Rita Mae recalls her angry reply: ” ‘I don’t care if I fall in love with a black or a white or a man or a woman or an old or young person. I just care that they have a good heart.’

1984: United Press International writes that Parade magazine was pulled because it’s lead article on sex was considered morally objectionable. The article identified eight styles of sexual behavior including “'the pansexual' who have 'frequent sex' and believe they are 'great lovers'”

1992: Newsweek describes Madonna’s Sex book to be full of “ erotic photos and writings, celebrating sadomasochism, homosexuality, exhibitionism and other pansexual delights”

1998: Village Voice describes a disco club frequented by both straight and gay disco fans a “pansexual playground”. A 1999 article by American Heritage uses the pansexual in the same way to describe to the same club.

2002: The Guardian reports on the pansexual revolution describing it as world where “labels like heterosexual, bisexual and homosexual - or even gay and lesbian - are considered outdated” and “it's about self-discovery through sexual experimentation. And it's also about limitless hedonism.”

The Theory of Pansexuality from the 6th Congress of Sexology: Human        beings, by nature must be, "pansexual" (from the Greek, Pan  = all) a complete sexual person. We all possess various sexual possibilities  generally classified as heterosexual, homosexual, bi-sexual, autoerotic, fetishist, sado-masochistic, etc.

Of course the notorious I_Am_Pansexul livejournal has to be included: “Pansexuals love people of all genders, male and female, but unlike bisexuals, pansexuals love transgendered, androgynous and gender fluid people, people who don't fit into the categories of male or female.”

2005: Creating Safe Space for GLBTQ Youth: A Toolkit by Girl's Best Friend Foundation & Advocates for Youth, pg 75

What is pansexuality? What is genderqueer?

The term 'bisexual' implies a sexual attraction towards people whose biological sex is different than and the same as one's own. Since, however, there are more than two genders, some people do not self-identify as bisexual, finding themselves attracted to people across a spectrum of genders.  These people have adopted different terms, including pansexual, a term that can also apply to people whose gender is fluid or who consider themselves genderqueer (or genderless).

#pansexual #the definition of pan

[impulsive-astrophile]

Post-ep fic recs for days

@muldaaah as promised, here’s a post-episode fic rec list! 

It’s not comprehensive by any means, but it will probably be pretty long! Nothing past the end of s7 as that’s where I stopped. (if there are any eps I don’t include that you would like me to, let me know)

Recs will be sorted into categories (in bold, linked to their corresponding tags on AO3 for a comprehensive list for that ep) by episode, will not include tags, and can be found under the cut to save your dash. All recs have MSR and are hosted on Ao3 unless otherwise stated.

As always, make sure you read the tags on the work before reading to make sure it’s content you want to consume!

Pilot (01x01)

Pilot Sex (series)

Summary: What if Mulder and Scully fucked in the pilot episode?

Rating: Explicit

Words: 22397

Fire (01x12)

Sick Day

Summary: An early MSR post ep piece of "Fire" of Scully taking care of Mulder.

Rating: Gen

Words: 617

Beyond the Sea (01x13)

My Lover Stands on Golden Sand

Summary: "So who are you leaning on, Scully?" asks Mulder gently. "I'm fine, Mulder," she says, and he tightens his arm around her. "It's okay if you're not," he whispers... and that's all it takes for her to break down.

Rating: Teen

Words: 3428

Fearful Symmetry (02x18)

Shampoo

Summary: Smutty Post-Ep for "Fearful Symmetry"

Rating: Explicit

Words: 3145

Paper Clip (03x02)

It's Cold Outside (multi-chapter)

Summary: For the Easter Fic Exchange: Mulder finds himself trapped at Maggie Scully's house during the course of recreating a family holiday with the rest of the Scully clan. And there's a blizzard. What else could happen? (Set Season 3 shortly after 'Paper Clip').

Rating: Mature

Words: 11302

731 (03x10)

Prayers Answered

Summary: SUMMARY: This is my entry into the Fandomonium First-Time-Smutfic Challenge; my episode: 731.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 7978

Got You(r) Back

Summary: "Mulder, you look like crap." "Aren't doctors supposed to have a warmer bedside manner?" "Aren't FBI agents supposed to have some concept of risk management?" Missing scene after S3E10 "731." Mulder's pretty beat up. Scully looks after him.

Rating: Teen

Words: 4933

Syzygy (03x13)

Cosmic Hearts

Summary:  A month after the events of Syzygy, Mulder and Scully face the feelings that were brought out on that case.

Rating: Teen

Words: 3018

A Little Frustration Between Partnerd

Summary: A Tumblr prompt for the first time Mulder talked dirty to Scully and her reaction to it. Set during Syzygy. Rating: Explicit Words: 542

Truly, Madly, Scully (multi-chapter)

Summary: Mulder and Scully hastily leave Comity and its once-every-84-years craziness borne from the syzygy of Mars, Uranus, and Neptune. Driven by the tempestuous Scully in the middle of the night, she and Mulder end up in a motel where Mulder will soon discover another form of syzygy: his Truly Madly Scully.

Rating: Not Rated

Words: 12516

Make a Change (multi-chapter)

Summary: Indulging into their vices, some unspoken truths become uncovered between Scully and Mulder. But then there's the aftermath. (Set during Season 3, Post-Syzygy. Tags will be added as needed.)

Rating: Explicit

Words: 11308

Chasing Fire

Summary: She could stop this right now, and their partnership would remain beyond reproach. There would be a few awkward weeks, but they'd put this night in the box labeled 'Things Never to Talk About,' and they'd move on. Like they always do. Except, she'd die an old, lonely maid because there would never be another man who could set her soul on fire the way Mulder does. She'd always be chasing that fire.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 8316

Shipper’s Digest 313: Syzygy Convergences (multiple works, not hosted on AO3)

Summary: It's been a while between digests, so I thought I'd dip the proverbial back in with this smut companion for that beloved Season 3 episode, Syzygy. Enjoy.

Rating: Explicit

Words: ~27622

Grotesque (03x14)

Fall Back Together

Summary: Post-Grotesque, our heroes engage in some bondage with the intention of relaxing and reconnecting. When it doesn't go to plan, they must navigate their way back to each other before the chasm deepens. This is maybe 5% porn, 5% dungeon emergency, 40% ode to meditative bondage, and 50% gross domestic aftercare.

Rating: Mature

Words: 4660

Keeping Them Away

Summary: Keeping the nightmares away. This time.

Rating: Gen

Words: 781

Pusher (03x17)

Enjoy The Silence (multi-chapter)

Summary: The horizon paled on the other side of the house, they fell asleep again, waiting for words to come back.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 9068

esoterica

Summary: There are times she thinks that she could love him. (Or: Chocolate and a Supermarket Scene.)

Rating: Teen

Words: 3927

Quagmire (03x22)

The Replacement

Summary: Mulder gets Scully a replacement dog after Queequeg; post ep: Quagmire.

Rating: Gen

Words: 1351

Wetwired (03x23)

the creature in the deep (multi-chapter)

Summary: In the aftermath of Scully’s mind control via television, she and Mulder depart to Norway to investigate the Kraken.

Rating: Teen

Words: 17548

Unruhe (04x04)

Rest

Summary: It was Mulder’s name she screamed, voice ricocheting off the walls. It was Mulder’s name she kept thinking about, promising herself he would come for her and promising herself that she would remember his name if he came too late. She had poured all her confidence in him, telling herself to keep talking because he would get there any minute. This dependency scares her a little bit. But she’s not the only one who has that dependency. She can also hear Mulder’s voice in her head – the way he banged on the side of the trailer, bellowing her name like his life depended on it. She could still his frantic calls as he smashed through the door, gun raised and pupils wide.

Rating: Gen

Words: 1983

The Field Where I Died (04x05)

Once More With Feeling

Summary: I can't live without you again.

Rating: Gen

Words: 12245

a roll of stars and fade to black

Summary: A rewrite of "The Field Where I Died".

Rating: Teen

Words: 9688

But Always Together.

Summary: This is basically me giving a giant middle finger to "The Field Where I Died." Mulder and Scully, throughout the ages.

Rating: Gen

Words: 2028

Searching Souls (not MSR)

Summary: Scully is drunk and annoyed. Mulder is amused. Clearly the perfect time to psychoanalyze the nature of past lives. Post-ep scene for "The Field Where I Died"

Rating: Gen

Words: 2243

Paper Hearts (04x10)

Will you take me as I am?

Summary: Angst. Written as an extended/alternative ending for Paper Hearts, which is one of my favorite episodes.

Rating: Gen

Words: 1934

Small Potatoes (04x20)

2:47 AM

Summary: N/A

Rating: Teen

Words: 2394

Demons (04x23)

It Lingers

Summary: The aftermath of trauma and the lingering effects of Mulder’s risky attempt to recover the truth about Samantha’s abduction leads to a revelation from Scully about her own coping mechanisms and flashes into a past she doesn’t fully remember...and the path to which they lead thereafter. For Miss Rachel (red2007) - I hope it is everything that you're looking for (and more?).

Rating: Teen

Words: 10014

Li(f)e

Summary: "Why did you do this," she said into the darkness, feeling the powerlessness and dread crash against her conscience.

Rating: Teen

Words: 1020

Demons

Summary: After the events in "Demons", Scully takes care of Mulder.

Rating: Teen

Words: 1474

Detour (05x04)

A Kitten to Build a Dream On

Summary: Mulder finds a kitten on his way to work, but he's running late for a meeting with Skinner, so he has to take it with him to the office. A day of adorable feline chaos ensues.

Rating: Teen

Words: 6885

Living

Summary: 18. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” 4. “Shut up and kiss me.”

Rating: Explicit

Words: 2431

Fault Lines

Summary: If she'd known how much time she would spend playing twenty questions with him on long drives, she never would have taken this assignment. (Mulder & Scully, in the car and on the plane, arguing all the way home from Leon County, Florida.)

Rating: Gen

Words: 1705

Chinga (05x10)

Calling You

Summary: Yet another phone conversation between Mulder and Scully in "Chinga". This is one is just a little different.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 1814

All work and no play...

Summary: The relief he feels lasts a grand total of four hours. Four hours where he has the office to himself, not having to think about justifying anything to anyone, not engaged in any arguments about anything, not even fighting over who gets to pay for lunch… god he’s bored.

Rating: Gen

Words: 2882

Kitsunegari (05x08)

The Aftermark

Summary: "How many more pushers were there in the world, waiting to turn him against his partner? What was Scully safe from, who could she trust with her life, if not him? " An episode tag for 5x08, "Kitsunegari", because there is not enough post-trauma cuddling on this show.

Rating: Teen

Words: 1708

Kill Switch (05x11)

Cling to me

Summary: Scully is being all clingy and Mulder is annoyed. Or is he?

Rating: Gen

Words: 1132

The Pine Bluff Variant (05x18)

Don't Ever Be Sorry

Summary: Mulder and Scully post Pine Buff Variant. MSR.

Rating: Gen

Words: 1276

Sanctuary

Summary: Mulder, entangled with the New Spartans and wracked with guilt. Scully, suspicious and worried. How do they cope in the aftermath of this case?

Rating: Mature

Words: 6748

All of This (a round) Us

Summary: A broken finger, a bottle of whiskey, and a conversation. Scully sets a bone.

Rating: Teen

Words: 2240

Invariable (not MSR)

Summary: Mulder is a man of many talents, but lying to Scully is not one of them. An episode tag for 5x18, "The Pine Bluff Variant".

Rating: Gen

Words: 1773

Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before

Summary: Post-ep for The Pine Bluff Variant. Scully wants to get Mulder away from the scene of the coverup.

Rating: Teen

Words: 2016

Stolen Moment

Summary: Written for the XF Missing Scene Challenge. This is a (slightly) NSFW scene for “The Pine Bluff Variant”.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 2014

Folie a Deux (05x19)

Committed

Summary: Mulder finds himself living out a longtime fear of being held in a psychiatric hospital. Spoilers for Folie a Deux

Rating: Teen

Words: 4235

Triangle (06x03)

Side Effects

Summary: After Mulder's doped-up declaration of love, Scully takes him home to rule out brain damage.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 5532

Walls crumble down

Summary: Mulder finally says "I love you" to Scully in his hospital bed after his adventure in the Bermuda triangle. How does this affect Scully? How does she react to this?

***

Remember those walls I built Well, baby they're tumbling down And they didn't even put up a fight They didn't even make up a soundI found a way to let you in But I never really had a doubtHit me like a ray of sun Burning through my darkest night You're the only one that I want Think I'm addicted to your lightI swore I'd never fall again But this don't even feel like falling Gravity can't forget To pull me back to the ground againFeels like I've been awakened Every rule I had you breakin' The risk that I'm takin' I'm never gonna shut you outYou're everything I need and more It's written all over your face

Rating: Teen

Words: 3447

Accord

Summary: A mostly Scully-sided look at the few moments beyond the final scene of Triangle and a simple, possibly canon-compliant gesture.

Rating: Gen

Words: 1159

Standing on the Precipice

Summary: Summary: If he dies, she’ll kill him. Or: How does Scully go from being gun-ready-to-go-off woman-on-a-mission to rolling her eyes at Mulder’s confession at the end of Triangle? Because surely nothing says I love you more than that whole scene.

Rating: Teen

Words: 1973

How the Ghosts Stole Christmas (06x06)

How Maggie Stole Christmas

Summary: Mulder hasn't really celebrated Christmas since Samantha was taken and unbeknownst to Scully, he receives an invite from Maggie to celebrate with the Scully family!

Rating: Teen

Words: 2930

Arcadia (06x15)

Into the Woods

Summary: A missing scene from Acadia; a direction the story ultimately didn't take.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 3988

Alpha (06x16)

Alpha

Summary: Their edges overlapped, bled, blurred together. Territorial, intimate. They laid claim to each other and then moved through their lives as though nothing had changed. What were they ever going to do with this? A domestic post-episode tag. “Alpha,” season 6.

Rating: Teen

Words: 1750

The Unnatural (06x19)

Rainstorms and Revelations

Summary: After an evening spent playing baseball together, Mulder and Scully make their way home in a rainstorm.

Rating: Gen

Words: 3143

Biogenesis, The Sixth Extinction, and Amor Fati (06x22, 07x01, and 07x02)

Voices In the Dark (Amor Fati)

Summary: A post-ep of "The Sixth Extinction II: Amor Fati," Mulder and Scully cuddle and talk in the early morning hours for a bit after he wakes from a nightmare. Fluff pretty much.

Rating: Teen

Words: 1108

Ophelia (Triptych) (all three eps!)

Summary: Love, distance, and mental illness

Rating: Teen

Words: 7720

replantation (Biogenesis)

Summary: She’s positive that she’d felt him, the moment that she saw him on the camera feed, pacing in circles and screaming, the sound raw and harsh and still ringing in her ears. He’d looked directly into the camera, directly at her, and she’d felt him, like an extension of her own body, brutally severed and left twitching with muscle spasms against the padded wall. [which Scully gets to him, regardless of the consequences.]

Rating: Teen

Words: 2524

The Goldberg Variation (07x06)

Ready

Summary: After the Henry Weems case, Mulder and Scully end up grocery shopping together

Rating: Teen

Words: 1048

The Amazing Maleeni (07x08)

Magic, Stars, and Desires

Summary: Takes place immediately after the end of The Amazing Maleeni. Mulder and Scully spend the day enjoying their time together. Flirting and fun is on the menu.

Rating: Mature

Words: 4201

Sein Und Zeit (07x10)

Dark Reflections

Summary: "It's been a hard night for him."

Rating: Teen

Words: 6523

You Make Me Feel Like I'm Not Good Enough

Summary: Missing scene for Season 7's Sein Und Zeit.

Rating: Gen

Words: 636

Luctus

Summary: “It’s been a hard night for him.” spoiler alert: this isn't a drabble

Rating: Explicit

Words: 2509

Shoved; Then Jumping

Summary: She didn’t want to think, didn’t want him to think — didn’t want to separate awkwardly, go about picking up strewn clothing and making apologies. So she didn’t.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 2475

Scully’s Brüste

Summary: This vignette takes place during Season 7, Episode 10 of the X-Files, “Sein und Zeit”. After the scene when Mulder breaks down crying in his living room in the dark with Sculy comforting him, and sometime before the scene the following morning when Skinner knocks on his door. This is something that may have happened...

Rating: Explicit

Words: 1313

Just Keep Breathing

Summary: A missing/ post scene from Sein Und Zeit. Scully tries to calm Mulder down after the death of his mother.

Rating: Not Rated

Words: 860

X-Cops (07x12)

nothing to hide

Summary: This, for once, isn’t their usual dialogue.

Rating: Gen

Words: 651

Stargazing in L.A. (multi-chapter)

Summary: Now that Mulder has found some closure regarding his family history is he ready to move on with the rest of his life? A short story based on Mulder and Scully's visit to L.A - what will they do with their evening off following their starring role in 'Cops'. Angst-free happiness.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 7044

All Things (07x17) - [this one’s very popular, I just haven’t read many of the fics yet]

in all things.

Summary: "Something had flicked a switch within her at that Temple and she realised that all things had led to this life, this man, this moment. From now on she was going to decide her own future and own it, and that meant fully embracing what she had with her partner. Her partner in all things."

Rating: Mature

Words: 2142

Brand X (07x18)

Wasted Breath

Summary: Post-"Brand X," what if the tobacco beetles left something behind?

Rating: Gen

Words: 5799

His New Mouthwash

Summary: Mulder can't get the taste of nicotine out of his mouth after Brand X. Scully helps him.

Rating: Explicit

Words: 635

#fic recs #xf fic recs #xf fics #fics #mine