#or some bruises

[toastydumpster]

"this guy ain't half bad"

#i love their slow burn but i just LOVE a ''oh no'' moment #also looking at some guy bloody and bruised and THAT'S when you start to develop feelings is so fucking relatable #hazbin hotel #huskerdust #angelhusk #angel dusk #husker #comics #my art

[sugarcoatednightshade]

thinking about how Humans Are Space Orcs stories always talk about how indestructible humans are, our endurance, our ability to withstand common poisons, etc. and thats all well and good, its really fun to read, but it gets repetitive after a while because we aren't all like that.

And that got me thinking about why this trope is so common in the first place, and the conclusion I came to is actually kind of obvious if you think about it. Not everyone is allowed to go into space. This is true now, with the number of physical restrictions placed on astronauts (including height limits), but I imagine it's just as strict in some imaginary future where humans are first coming into contact with alien species. Because in that case there will definitely be military personnel alongside any possible diplomatic parties.

And I imagine that all interactions aliens have ever had up until this point have been with trained personnel. Even basic military troops conform to this standard, to some degree. So aliens meet us and they're shocked and horrified to discover that we have no obvious weaknesses, we're all either crazy smart or crazy strong (still always a little crazy, academia and war will do that to you), and not only that but we like, literally all the same height so there's no way to tell any of us apart.

And Humans Are Death Worlders stories spread throughout the galaxy. Years or decades or centuries of interspecies suspicion and hostilities preventing any alien from setting foot/claw/limb/appendage/etc. on Earth until slowly more beings are allowed to come through. And not just diplomats who keep to government buildings, but tourists. Exchange students. Temporary visitors granted permission to go wherever they please, so they go out in search of 'real terran culture' and what do they find?

Humans with innate heart defects that prevent them from drinking caffeine. Humans with chronic pain and chronic fatigue who lack the boundless endurance humans are supposedly famous for. Humans too tall or too short or too fat to be allowed into space. Humans who are so scared of the world they need to take pills just to function. Humans with IBS who can't stand spicy foods, capsaicin really is poison to them. Lactose intolerance and celiac disease, my god all the autoimmune disorders out there, humans who struggle to function because their own bodies fight them. Humans who bruise easily and take too long to heal. Humans who sustained one too many concussions and now struggle to talk and read and write. Humans who've had strokes. Humans who were born unable to talk or hear or speak, and humans who through some accident lost that ability later.

Aliens visit Earth, and do you know what they find? Humanity, in all its wholeness.

#humans are space orcs #humans in space #earth is a deathworld #earth is space australia #tagging this so that ppl can find it even though the space shit i write about always feels like its in direct opposition to all the pop tag #also my biggest pet peeve in all of writing - all writing. everywhere. not just in fanfic but books and tv and movies too - is when people #write off an injury by saying something like 'oh nothing bad just a couple of scratches some bruising and a minor concussion' like girl WHA #MiNOr ConCuSSioN is such an oxymoron and I hate it so fucking much. like i dont care how minor it was thats still brain damage. #especially when the same character does this more than once. like im sorry ms. but uh. you can no longer read. or talk eloquently. sorry #evidence: my brother has had two 'minor' concussions and now cannot read write or speak without tremendous effort. And like its totally #ruined my ability to watch action shows/movies because now i just sit there and count how many concussions there characters are getting #after a certain point it becomes totally impossible to believe that these guys are able to function. (still fun to watch tho im not a hater

[dracoryss]

so many half assed doodles from the last month I had to share at least something, I cant keep them out of my system!!

#Jaytim #Still debating on giving jason some stubble #maybe i should bruise them a bit some #dc #my art

[radioroxx]

in. clover lives aus or aus where they choose to live in the underground whatnot. i think more ppl should play with the idea that their friends know Jackshit About Humans. please and thanks

#undertale yellow #starlo thought humans were fireproof. whos gonna tell him #martlet was only able to recognize them for their hat #im sure they know SOME but. it would be sooo fucking funny if that knowledge is a limited as possible #monsters arent made of flesh n blood. do they know how to deal with scraps n bruises #do they know human sleep schedules. do they know about human health and illness. is anyone gonna tell starlo that clovers not fireproof #ive always been obsessed with scenarios of non-humans learning human facts jfkf things that r obvious to. us ofc #its always silly #anyway all that to say i have yet to see ONE sickfic <- disappointed #also im procrastinating doing research for school #guuuuyyyys if you loved me you talk to me while im doing researches. it helps i prommy

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

fantasy laughingstock mawwiage but make it potc3 Flavor-

#theyre supposed to be holding hands but i couldnt draw it for the life of me so #half assed it is!!!! #or.... no assed it is!!! #in my mind this is a job gone Phenomenally wrong. like horribly wrong #the group is outnumbered and cornered and- #its fine in the end tho #and howdy & barnaby are left standing there like 'so we didnt die. looks like we're husbands now! lets go find some neat rings' #in the meantime wally and julie braid them rings out of grass & flowers #actually wait omg #imagining there's a spell that can freeze the flower rings so that they wont break/decompose #all of barnaby's normal metal rings and then there's one made of plants... of Life... OUUUGHHHHHHHH #< thats the sound of me dying so dramatically. im talking nimona-as-ambrosius level of dramatic death #scribble salad #laughingstock #wh fantasy au #wait omggggg #im imagining once theyre all safe and it sinks in that the Are Indeed Safe #everyone is like 'omg!!! we made it!!! hugging each other! wait wheres barnaby and howdy - ohhhhh theyre making out off to the side cool' #theyre just. laying in the grass smoochin the hell outta each other #yeah theyre both bleeding and bruised but who isnt! #and then they stay right there and take a nap <3 #and wake up w/ the rest of the neighborhood piled on/around them <3 #GODDDDDDDD FUCK FUCK FUCK IM SO NORMAL ABOUT THEM IM SO NORMAL IM- #SO NOT NORMAL ABOUT THEM AGH RAGH ASDHASJFCBALFNLD #sorry sorry. the insanity is kicking in #alsoooooo imagining them having that epic potc3 mid-battle kiss after barbosa - sorry - Sally pronounces them married

[cyberwhumper]

Shouldn't have been running your mouth.

#whump #whumpee #whumpblr #oc #art #whump art #blood #impaled #bruises #bleeding #left to die #original character #original story #tokimeki art #Whiskey #some days you go out drinking with the boys #others you get stabbed and gored in the bathroom #it is a coin toss really #this is one of my favorite experimental pieces

[tubbytarchia]

Nerfed (Alts under cut)

#docm77 fanart #docm77 #cw blood #blood cw #tw blood #cw gore #gore cw #tw gore #cw amputation #I hope thats good lol #sigh I do love me some bloodied and bruised characters sometimes #idk if dinnerbone was working with mojang yet when this happened but regardless #imagine being so OP that god nerfs you #The horns and goat motif dont make a lot of sense to be here but we can suspend some belief... pleading emoji #tubby art #hermitblr

[slavhew]

reread going great

#paranatural #pnat #isabel guerra #richard spender #admin draws #fanart #*metal clanging* *cars crashing* *children crying* IM DOING FINE ITS FINE ITS COOL #everyone drop what ur doing and go read paranatural rn im so serious #isabel i need to give oyu a hug and also hold spender down so you can properly punch him please #who knows u might even knock some sense in with that bruise !

[redraine57]

Why must the advanced moves feel like being set on fire? 🙃

#me #definitely got some bruising going on after this move but soon #i wont feel a thing hehehehe

[lavenoon]

Putting this man through the horrors (squishy friend with reckless abandon)

@naffeclipse when will I stop? remains to be seen

*self insert is not a girl (he/she)

og detective au by sunnys-aesthetic!

#post let luce #dcamv #sleuth jesters #my art #because I forgot my art tag yesterday again lmao #but yeah I realized the bounty hunter is gonna have fun bc I am covered in mystery bruises at any given time #sorry sir I'm clumsy and uncoordinated but I will not stop ever #I'm already having some more ideas but yknow tomorrow is another day #let those thoughts simmer too #self indulgence go brr #cw guns #uh. i mean. just to be safe fhdjsk #bloodstain fool #menace4menace

[enden-k]

taru, somewhere in the waters for who knows how long after he broke out from underwater jail, possibly reliving abyss trauma or smth, while fontaine is about to be flooded :

"yea hell be fine"

my bbg falling and scraping the entirety of his ass in a tournament :

#i rewatch the scene and THE INSANE FEELINGS I GET GAAAAAAAAH I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF HIS BRUISES AND CARE FOR HIM #HE HAS BAD POSTURE AND BACK PAINS AND IS IN HIS THIRTIES HE DEF TWISTED SMTH HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW EXIST AND CRY ABOUT GETTING OLD even tho he #never did so before bc 30 is not old at all but still young but its rather the realiziation that he indeed is getting older and feeling it #so its settling in and giving him a crisis he accidentally got himself into when he was just meaning to whine about his bone pains and #haithams just looking blankly into the camera before he continues cleaning his cuts and scrapes and tells him to calm down and stop fussing #and then kaveh eventually calms down from the entire tournament and the fall and brainwash attempt and the thing about his father and sees #that his reaction rlly was just piled up from everything that had happened today and just got out over smth as trivial as some aching bones #(and prob a twisted knee or smth) #im rambling its my mushy brain #i should focus on doing the trial LMAO #babbles #genshin tag

[jasontoddsguns]

My uncle crashed his motorcycle on his way to watch Oppenheimer, he proceeded to then get back on his bike and drive to the theatre despite having crashed. 2 hours and a movie later- the shock/adrenaline wore off and he almost passed out while trying to leave the theatre. He said the movie was good tho.

#oppenheimer #he’s fine #just bruised up and has some pulled muscles