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#quality might suck sry
turnaboutchaos · 2 years
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i forgot i had a tablet lying around that ive like, never used before, so i decided to practice on it w/ generated quotes lmao
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moririki · 3 years
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⤷ PUSHING THE LIMITS
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TSUKISHIMA KEI X READER -> 2.7K
you decide to see how far you can push your boyfriend before he snaps
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REQUEST -> ✰
CONTAINS -> SMUT!!!!!, bratty reader i GUESS, uhm my second smut ever so quality won't be amazing, fingering, oral (giving), unprotected sex, , tsukki teasing you <3, but hes also soft at the end brrr
MORI'S THOUGHTS -> WOOOWOOOO 100 FOLLOWERS EVENT IS A GO!!! sry about the quality dipping halfway through i did not write this in one sitting ✌️
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YOU KNEW THAT YOU WERE COMING OVER TO YOUR BOYFRIEND'S DORM TO STUDY, but when he greeted you with a searing kiss that was enough to have you trying to catch your breath, you realised that he may or may not be wanting to play dirty. he had a history project, you had an essay to finish, the two of you were fairly busy. luckily working together in a comfortable silence worked surprisingly well for the both of you. most of the time, anyway.
but you were still reeling from his kiss and your thoughts were straying far from the subject material needed to finish your paper. only ten minutes in to your study session, you were ready to call it a night and spend some quality time with tsukishima. currently, the two of you were lying side by side on his bed, trying not to slip off the edge due to how narrow it was. while your pen had stilled on its page, tsukishima was rapidly typing away on his laptop with slightly furrowed brows.
even with his facial features scrunched up, you still found yourself admiring your boyfriend's face as he concentrated on his project. the reflection of the laptop on his glasses only added to the look, and you almost found yourself sighing dreamily at how handsome he looked.
"quit staring, idiot," tsukishima mumbled without glancing up from his work. when you didn't make a single movement to follow his suggestion, his eyes flicked towards you with an unimpressed expression adorning his face. he raised a hand from the jeyboard to flick your forehead lightly, just enough to make you huff and return to your notebook. though yiu already had gotten the structure and general points already planned out, the actual construction of your essay was yet to happen. instead, you twirled your pen before raising it to your lips. you bit your lip in mock thought on just how to start writing your essay, though a more satisfying result occured when you heard a sharp intake of breath from beside you.
you tried not to look too smug as you turned to look at your boyfriend in amusement.
"look who's staring now, kei," you smiled up at him and he glowered at you.
"bite your lip once more, i dare you." you only giggled at his threat, seeing as he was playing directly into your hand.
but now you had to play a waiting game, so you went back to your essay. you even managed to complete an opening paragraph before deciding to ramp things up a notch.
you faked a yawn, arching your back as you stretched before rolling over, closer to tsukishima. you ended up on your back, practically underneath him, with his golden eyes watching you carefully. they remained trained on your face as you batted your eyelashes at him, before trailing down to your mouth again as you oh-so-carefully tugged your bottom lip between your teeth.
you barely had time to blink before you found yourself really lying underneath him, one of his hands resting against your face, his thumb coaxing your bottom lip back out from your teeth. the other had collected your hands, pinning them above your head by the wrist with ease.
"i thought i told you not to do that again, hm?" despite his tone, kei's eyes had some glint of mischief in them, enough to make you squirm under his grasp.
"oops." the way the smile never dropped from your face did little to convince kei that you were sincere, but he knew you were looking for some sort of reaction when you held his gaze as you parted your lips, softly biting the tip of his thumb.
you watched the way his eyes darkened from above and his grip on your wrists tightened. kei surged forwards, pressing his lips to yours roughly and you grinned as you kissed him back with as much vigour. the hand that had been on your jaw now travelled downwards before reaching your bare thigh.
kei gripped it harshly, hiking it up roughly to latch around his waist. you hummed into the kiss at the sensation, digging your heel into his back to feel some friction from his crotch rubbing against your thigh. kei groaned at the sensation, breaking the kiss to glare at you.
"you're such a brat."
"yeah, but you love me." you grinned up at him, face flushed and body practically buzzing from his touch.
kei muttered a "whatever" before kissing you again, harder than before. his hips rolled against yours, making your breath hitch in your throat. you tried to free your wrists to wrap your arms around his shoulders, anything to get him closer to you, but it was futile. kei snickered at your attempt to overpower him, though he had some mercy when he pulled away again to slip off your shorts with his free hand. you clamped your thighs together when you were left in just your underwear and under the scrutiny of your boyfriend.
"don't go shy on me now, pretty," kei teased you, rubbing soft circles into the plush of your thighs with his thumb. you flustered at the pet name, but let him part your legs and hook a finger along the waistband of your panties and drag them down your legs ever so slowly.
the cold air of the room made you clench slightly, but kei blowing on your pussy made you gasp and squirm in his hold. kei smirked at your reaction, trailing a single pretty finger of his around your entrance, humming at how wet you already were.
"you're really making my job a lot easier, pretty," he muttered, pressing a quick kiss to your lips as he slowly slipped a single finger inside you. you sucked in a shaky breath as he curled it inside you, feeling him reach the spongy spot which had you tensing and moaning softly.
his palm rested against your clit, the slight roughness of it proving to be enough stimulation. you found your hips raising, desperate for more friction, but kei's hand stilled as you whined from underneath him.
"come on, what happened to being patient?" he teased. you managed to glare back at him, before kei dipped his head again and decorated the column of your neck with deliberate kisses that had your head tilted back with pleasure. kei's finger started moving again, leaving your body blistering with sensations that were quickly building up to your release.
kei soon added another finger, with you moaning at the additional stretch. he scissored them inside you, stretching your walls out and leaving your toes curling. with his lips never stopping from administering hickeys all across your collarbones, you felt the heady buzz of an orgasm start to wash over you. you felt your lower stomach tighten in anticipation, only for it all to be ripped away from you at the last minute as kei removed his fingers from your hole, now sopping wet with your slick.
"what do you say that we put your mouth to good use, huh?" you could only nod at tsukishima's suggestion as your chest rose and fell rapidly, head still spinning from being taken so close to the edge. you just about registered tsukishima raising his hand and bringing his souled fingers to your mouth.
without a single word from him, your lips parted and you welcomed his two fingers into your mouth, sucking on them softly to clean them and tasting yourself on him. kei groaned at how compliant you were, pulling his fingers free before connecting your lips with his once again. he could taste the faintest trace of you on your tongue, and this dragged a soft moan from him that went through you like a shock if electricity.
with that, tsukishima finally released your wrists, leaning back before getting off of the bed. he grabbed hold of your ankles, dragging you until you were seated at the edge of the bed right in front of him, staring up at him expectantly with your heartbeat running wild. kei almost cooed at the lovestruck expression in your eyes, but he chose to lean back, eyes appraising your figure in a leisurely manner.
"strip for me." you almost took a double take at his words, though the tone showed just hiw serious he was being. his eyes were hungry as they zeroed in on your fingers curling around the hem of your shirt, pulling it over your head fluidly so that your top half matched your bottom. "aww, aren't you eager," kei crooned, his hand cradling your face. if you weren't blushing profusely from his remark you might have asked him about his own flushed cheeks.
instead, you diverted your attention to his own shirt, tugging at it softly to prompt him to do the same as you had seconds ago. kei caught on quickly, tugging the material over his head along with your help, your hands smoothing over his toned skin as soon as it was revealed. with your wrists finally freed, you could touch him just as much as you wanted, and you did. your fingers trailed down his sides and back up again, tracing patterns into his skin. you decoded to be brave, hooking your fingers into his waistband and pulling his body closer to you, to which kei gladly complied.
then your mouth was on him, leaving open mouthed kisses that trailed dangerously lower down his v-line. you came back up, making sure to suck a hickey into the skin just above his hip where a rare mole rested. you heard another shaky intake of breath from your lover, and felt a small jab of satisfaction at the sound. you felt fingers thread theough your hair, before pulling on it and forcing your head back until you were locking eyes with tsukishima.
"i think your mouth can do something else now, hm?" you nodded as best as you could, pulling your lip between your teeth as you focused on the rather visible bulge under your boyfriend's sweatpants. you curled fingers underneath his waistband once more, pulling both his sweats and boxers down in one go.
kei's dick, now freed, slapped against his stomach, already leaking precum that had inevitably soaked the material of his boxers. you pumped his length with your hand a few times, able to slide it up and down easily due to his precum, before taking him into your mouth.
no matter how many times you've done this, you still struggled to fully swallow his length. you still managed a great amount, and the rest was handled with your hand. you bobbed your head, setting your own pace and resisting the urge to gag when you felt his tip hit the back of your throat.
you settled into a rhythm, relaxing your jaw and placing a hand on his thigh to brace yourself. you coukd hear his groans from above you and it spurred you on, even thiugh your lungs were starting to burn from a lack of breathing.
before the sensation got unbearable, kei laced his fingers in your hair and pulled you away from his dick. when you looked up at his face you couldn't help but admire how pretty your boyfriend was all over again. while last time he had been focusing on a history project, his cheeks were flushed and he was out of breath, even going ahead and biting his own lip now. you thought the urge to be sarcastic about it.
"fuck, pretty, i can't wait," kei groaned, his fingers finding purchase on your hips and helping you lift them. in one swift motions, you hd been turned so that now you were on your hands and knees, feet hanging off the edge of the bed. you felt a hand smooth over the small of your back before kei leaned over you, his body radiating warmth as he pressed a quick kiss to your shoulder- a nonverbal question as to whether you were ok. when you looked back at his face and nodded, your boyfriend grinned before turning his attention to his dick.
he used a hand to position it, just barely parting your folds. you whined at the contact and how kei was teasing you, running the tip between your folds as you squirmed.
"kei, please," you pleaded breathily, and the hand that he rested on your back stilled.
"that's all you had to say, pretty," he mumbled, before pushing into you.
you moaned at the sensation, enjoying the stretch of him filling you up as he bottomed out. after a few moments of him staying still, you reached behind you to squeeze his hand and remind him that yes, he could in fact move.
at your confirmation kei placed his hands on your hips, keeping them still as he pulled out then thrusted back in, eliciting a soft moan from you. kei groaned in unison, the timbre of his voice making you clench around him. his hips never stilled, picking up a pace that had you moaning unashamedly and fisting kei's bedsheets as his dick hit the spot inside you which had you seeing stars.
a particularly hard thrust had you falling to your elbows as your arms gave out. the new angle only helped kei hit deeper and you practically screamed into the sheets at the stimulation.
"kei, fuck!" you barely sounded coherent, and the sound of your fucked-out voice just spurred kei on with his brutal pace. his thrusts were starting to lose their rhythm, though, and kei could tell that you were close too from the erratic spasms of your walls.
you couldn't even warn him that you were going to cum when kei brought a hand down to your clit, providing just that extra amount of friction to send you over the edge with a cry. that didn't stop kei from thrusting into you, helping you ride out your high as he let out a groan from the feeling of you clamping down around him.
he indulged in a few more thrusts before pulling out, pumping his length to finish before cumming on the shallow dip of your lower back. he then rather unceremoniously flopped down onto the bed next to you, joining you in the breathless afterglow of both of your orgasms.
after a few minutes, he rolled over to pepper kisses along your shoulderblade and run a hand down your back, careful to avoid the mess that he made.
"you feel like finishing that essay now, brat?" you giggled at his question, curling your hand around his as your spent body regained still regained strength.
"mm, maybe tomorrow," you hummed. kei kissed your shoulder one last time before getting up, padding off to the bathroom to clean himself up. you heard the distant sound of a tap running for a few seconds before kei came back to you, wet towel in hand. you felt the warmth of it against your back as kei cleaned you up, before handing it to you to clean the rest of yourself as he pulled on his sweatpants.
after you finished, he then handed you his sweatshirt, helping your tired arms to pull it over your head so that you were swaddled in the cloth.
the two of you lay down in tsukishima's bed, your back to his chest as you shared the same pillow. with the average hours of sleep that you both got as university students, this rest was needed. one of kei's hands came up
to tilt your face to look at his before he captured your lips in a kiss, albeit softer than the others he had given you earlier.
"goodnight, brat," he whispered to you.
"love you too, tsukki," you mumbled, already feeling the embrace of sleep tugging you towards unconsciousness. your boyfriend tugged you closer as well, pressing his face into your shoulder and making you grin in the dark.
that smile only widened when you heard the quietest love you too escape his lips minutes later, when he thought you had fallen asleep.
"i heard that, you know." kei only grumbled, squeezing you tighter.
"no you didn't, go to sleep."
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take a look at the menu - ,, 📕 ·˚ ༘ ꒱
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kae-karo · 4 years
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Hi can you write 13 and 21 please sry if I ask for too much :)
for context (x - make me write things!)
oh my gosh first of all please do not feel like u have to apologize i love any opportunity to write my fave ships and this was no different also i just need to say ur icon and header are amajiki and kiri two of the best Best Boyes on the entire show i literally love them and would die for them
anyway! thank u so much and i hope u enjoy and don’t mind that i put these as two separate lil prompts
13. “Look, I know you’re a hardass, but can you play with my hair? It would really help.” - hawks - [read on ao3] - this is loosely based on the idea of hawks having bird-like qualities, specifically raptor stress grip (x) but also the idea that he likes being preened 
21. “This might sound selfish, but I don’t care about the world - I only care about you!” - villain!denki - [read on ao3] - go read this (x) first cause i feel like this suits a part 2
13 - [read on ao3]
Hawks’ grip on his arm is something unusual - not quite strong enough to be classed as painful, but strong nonetheless. Any harder and it might border on the feeling of his father dragging him around as a child, his hand so tight it threatened to snap his arm. But this falls short of that, and Dabi’s grateful.
He’d rather that anything associated with Hawks be positive, or at least not remind him of his past.
“You’re sure it’s fine?” Hawks asks for the twelfth time in the past ten minutes. Dabi huffs out a breath of laughter.
“Yes, it’s totally fine,” he reassures Hawks yet again. He’s only ever done this to Dabi once before, but it already feels strangely comforting to know that, in some way, he chose to seek out Dabi when he’d become overwhelmed.
It’s a stress thing - something to do with his quirk, Hawks told him - and Dabi wonders if he should really be appreciative of something that’s a source of unease for Hawks. Not that he knows what exactly happened, but he assumes if it were important, Hawks would’ve told him by now.
Maybe it’s selfish, but he kind of hopes Hawks continues to stay stressed out. Dabi’s not used to having him this close for however long it takes him to calm down, but he’s starting to enjoy the company.
Dabi watches patiently as Hawks’ gaze flicks around the empty room - Dabi’s room, where he’d been going through some profiles for other potential recruits before Hawks had burst in. The last time this had happened, it’d only lasted for maybe fifteen minutes, which means his time with Hawks is likely running out.
Although Hawks doesn’t look any less stressed than when he’d rushed in, not that Dabi’s complaining.
“You should, uh…” Hawks nods at Dabi’s papers. “I didn’t mean to take you away from whatever you were doing.” Dabi shakes his head.
“You didn’t interrupt, it can wait.” Dabi can wait, he could wait an eternity with Hawks clinging to him like this. Hawks’ fingers tighten on Dabi’s arm just slightly.
“No, that’s-” He shakes his head. “It’s really not helping, worrying that I’m keeping you from doing stuff.” Hawks’ voice is relatively even, but his eyes never stop wandering the room, and Dabi’s starting to wonder if this is going to last a bit longer than the first time. He crushes down the little spark in his chest that says he hopes it does.
Hawks is clearly still stressed, and Dabi shouldn’t be taking advantage of that. No matter how it makes him feel to have Hawks so close.
So he picks up a paper, the one he’d been looking at before Hawks barrelled in and plopped down beside him on his bed, and scans it superficially.
At first, it’s truly just with the intent of appeasing Hawks’ nerves and pretending he’s focused on his work instead of the warm grip of Hawks’ hands on his arm, but it soon becomes a genuine effort. He’s pretty sure he’s the only one in the League actively searching for potential new recruits, and he’ll be damned if this whole thing falls apart while Shigaraki is away. Not that he had officially dubbed Dabi his replacement, but Dabi’s pretty sure it was implied.
Besides, nobody else is really fit to take up the mantle.
So he loses himself in the various pages he’d printed - his eyes started hurting from staring too long at a computer screen - and searches with intent for the right qualities that might make another useful member of the team. Or pawn, depending on what they bring to the table.
With his eyes buried in endless pages, it takes him nearly an hour to realize Hawks’ head has slowly drifted to rest on his shoulder. In fact, it takes Hawks huffing out a breath that might be laughter for Dabi to notice this new position, and he has to reign in the sudden racing of his heart to prevent it from scaring Hawks away.
But his hands haven’t moved from their spot on Dabi’s arm, and Dabi lets his gaze drift to the tufts of hair tickling his neck.
“You really think that kid’s going to be of any use?” Hawks says, his tone light and humorous but more than obviously forced. Whatever’s going on in his head, his it’s clear that his concerns haven’t subsided. Dabi’s starting to wonder if he should be asking about what happened, why he’s so stressed all of a sudden.
“I think he has potential.” Dabi rearranges the pile of papers he’d just set this profile down on top of. “Why, you don’t?” He hadn’t said a word about what he was doing, but Hawks must live up to his name - he must have incredible observation skills to notice how Dabi has been organizing these people, to recognize which pile was for the ones he deemed useful.
“Your criteria are too superficial.” Hawks’ head shifts on Dabi’s shoulder, but he doesn’t lift it. “Powerful quirks, high-up connections, anger management issues? It’s too broad, they won’t hold together in the long run.” Now it’s Dabi’s turn to blow out a breath.
“For someone who got recruited by me, I feel like you’re not really in any position to judge,” Dabi says. He’s pretty sure his tone contained enough sarcasm to warrant a laugh, but Hawks’ hands just tighten on his arm. 
As much as he’s enjoying Hawks’ company, he’s not sure it’s healthy for him to be on edge for this long. He shifts and picks up another paper, but he’s not really reading it.
“What do you normally do?” Dabi asks, trying to keep his voice soft. He was always terrified of his father’s yelling, to the point that even hearing him talk too loudly would kick his panic up a notch. 
“What- what, for recruiting? I don’t really do that, I mean I guess I do for the agency, but not-”
“No, no,” Dabi interrupts Hawks’ rambling. He does his best not to smile at the reaction - Hawks is stressed, it’s not something he should be considering cute.
“When this happens,” Dabi gestures to his arm and Hawks’ hands clinging there, “what do you do?” Hawks exhales a breath and a soft ‘oh’.
“I don’t, um…” he trails off, and Dabi waits patiently, his silly hopes fluttering in his chest. He’s not usually one for hugs, but if Hawks is gearing up to ask for one, he might be willing to make an exception. 
“I’m not usually around anyone I can trust.” 
Now it’s Dabi’s turn to let out an equally soft ‘oh’. Hawks trusts him? Trusts him, of all people? A villain, someone who could set him on fire with a single touch? He trusts Dabi in spite of that?
“Okay…” Dabi fumbles for words in the silence, not daring to look over at where Hawks is still resting on his shoulder. He can’t tell if the air has suddenly become thicker, coating his tongue and throat and lungs and making it impossible to breathe, or if he’s just overreacting.
“Is it…normal for it to last this long?” Hawks trusts him, and he should trust that Hawks would say something if this was unusual, but it doesn’t stop his concerns from bubbling over and falling from his lips. 
Hawks stiffens and clears his throat.
“Sorry, I didn’t- I didn’t think it would, I’d stop if I could, I just-”
“No, that’s not-” Dabi sighs. “Is…is there anything I can do to help?” He’s not trying to get Hawks to leave, but it’s clear this whole thing is only continuing to stress him out. Not that Dabi has any clue what got him to this state in the first place, but if he can help him calm down, maybe he can find out.
Hawks shifts beside him, and he sucks in a breath. Dabi expects he’ll release it along with a suggestion for how Dabi can help, but he just exhales. So Dabi waits a few more seconds, then a few more after that, until it’s most definitely been too long.
“Well?” Dabi tries again. Hawks sighs, and his hands tighten on Dabi’s arm. Dabi can’t imagine how on earth trying to calm him down would somehow stress him out more, but-
“Look, I know you’re a hardass…” Dabi freezes - is that what Hawks thinks of him? Hawks takes a deep breath, and his voice barely comes out above a whisper. “But can you play with my hair? It would…really help.” 
Hawks goes still, totally and completely still, as if his own words have startled him, and Dabi stares hard at the paper in his hand. It’s all a blur of black and white, letters that don’t turn into words but mix around on the page and blend together into all shades of gray. Hawks wants…he wants Dabi to touch him? 
Just his hair, just to help him calm down, Dabi reminds himself. This isn’t anything, it doesn’t mean anything. He tamps down on the voice in the back of his head that says Hawks trusts him. That doesn’t mean anything either.
With as much care as he can manage in spite of his sudden nerves, Dabi lifts his hand to the mess of hair on his shoulder. Hawks doesn’t move, doesn’t shout out a last minute ‘wait, stop!’, doesn’t pull himself away, and Dabi lets his fingers comb gently through the wild locks. 
Hawks’ breath slows almost immediately, and Dabi wishes desperately that he could see Hawks’ face right now. Not that he needs much reassurance that this is truly helping Hawks - the grip on his arm loosens, and Hawks leans into his shoulder. A rustling sounds behind Dabi’s head, but it’s not til the expanse of a wing flops into view that he realizes Hawks must’ve let them droop to the bed. 
Dabi holds his tongue, afraid to ruin whatever’s happening, afraid to set Hawks on edge again when he clearly needs to relax, but questions buzz inside his head and demand to make an appearance.
“That’s helping?” he asks first, and his lip curls up in an admittedly self-satisfied smile when Hawks nods into the crook of Dabi’s neck. 
It’s soothing, both the repetitiveness of his hand in Hawks’ hair and the comforting warmth of Hawks leaning further and further into him, and the warmth spreads through his body and up to his brain, encasing it in a pleasant fog. He’s vaguely aware he’d wanted to ask something else, or maybe several somethings, but they’re lost behind a veil of comfort.
Before he can stop himself, Dabi leans back toward his pillow, gently pulling Hawks with him. His brain isn’t exactly capable of coherent thought right now, but he’d like to imagine it’d tell him what a great thing he’s doing, how this is definitely helping Hawks.
And he’s pretty sure he’d be right.
Hawks’s grip doesn’t release from his arm, but it’s loose enough now that he manages to comfortably curl himself against Dabi’s side, and his head lands on Dabi’s chest. 
Dabi’s eyes drift shut of their own accord, and he doesn’t even bother with the excuse to himself that he’s just resting them. He’s warm and Hawks is here and everything else is drifting into the background so what else even matters? 
“Thank you,” Hawks mumbles into his shirt, and Dabi’s chest feels like it’s exploding. But the pretty kind of explosion, like art. He feels like artwork, with Hawks pressed against him, like something far more than himself.
“Anything for you, little bird.”
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21 - [read on ao3]
“You asshole!” Denki screams, and the wooden chair creaks as he struggles against the bindings. Hitoshi dips his head.
“We need to know what you know,” Aizawa says again. Denki coughs out a bitter laugh.
“I don’t know anything, I’ve never known anything, and there’s nothing you could do to me that would matter anyway.” His words cut like ice - he’d said that once before, before all this had happened.
“I swear I don’t know anything, can you tutor me, Shinsou?” And god, Hitoshi had fallen for it. Fallen for everything Denki said.
Fallen for Denki.
“I thought we were saving Kirishima!” Denki shouts again, and Hitoshi is grateful for the soundproofed room they’re in. Aizawa has some weird resources, but he supposes they’re useful.
“We did,” Hitoshi argues.
“And then you brainwashed me.” He’s never heard Denki like this, his tone so acidic it rivals Mina’s quirk. Hitoshi’s head hurts as it tries to reconcile everything - Denki’s betrayal with his prior kindness, Hitoshi’s own promises to never do something like that to a friend with the question of whether Denki ever was a friend.
Friends don��t betray friends.
“We need information,” Aizawa butts in, straightforward as ever. “There are lives on the line.”
“There are always lives on the line, why does it suddenly matter so damn much?” Hitoshi turns away - the Denki he knows would care, at least a little. He wanted to be a hero, what the hell happened?
“Man, I swear I have to get way better with my quirk or I’ll never be a real hero!” Hitoshi had laughed at that, at the idea that Denki would be anything other than exactly who he wanted to be. Hitoshi always found himself laughing around Denki.
“Why- why does it matter?” Aizawa’s clearly losing his patience. Hitoshi inhales a few deep breaths, trying to keep himself calm. But how the hell is he supposed to be calm when his best friend turned on him? On the entire school?
How was he so easily fooled?
“Shinsou, please, keep an eye on him,” Aizawa grumbles, brushing past Hitoshi and out the door. “I need a minute.”
Hitoshi doesn’t want to turn around. He doesn’t want to see those bright yellow eyes turned hard and brutal against him. He would rather remember the way his mouth opened a little too wide when he laughed, the way he hung around Hitoshi even when he didn’t think he wanted the company, the way he could quote Shakespeare word for word then turn around and ask Hitoshi if birds could see the same colors as people.
“You’re no better than I am,” Denki hisses at Hitoshi’s back, and the words creep up Hitoshi’s spine and worm their way into his ears. He wishes he could pull them out, throw them to the ground and squish them under his feet.
“You betrayed me, and I betrayed you, so we’re even now,” Hitoshi says to the wall. Denki coughs out a laugh.
“Perfect, you can let me out of here, then.”
“Not until you tell us who you’re working for, who your contacts are.” Maybe Hitoshi’s been spending too much time with Aizawa, but his mentor is right, there are lives at stake, and Denki might have the intel that could help save them.
“I don’t know,” Denki says again, “what the hell do I have to say to get you to believe me?” 
“I did believe you,” Hitoshi says, though he wishes he hadn’t. His tongue refuses to stop now that it’s started, though, and all the damn emotions he’s been holding back come spilling from his lips.
“I believed you wanted to be a hero, I believed you wanted to help. I believed you were my friend.” He does turn around now, and he almost regrets it - Denki’s staring back, eyes wide and lips parted like he might be about to argue that point. Hitoshi wishes he would, wishes he would say something and make Hitoshi believe it.
But nothing comes out, only an aching silence that makes Hitoshi want to scream, but he doesn’t. He won’t lose himself in front of Denki, not when he’s taken everything else. No, Hitoshi can hold onto his anger. That’d been a gift from Denki, after all.
“I believed you loved classic literature and didn’t understand geometry and liked pranking the other students and wanted to control your quirk and I believed you cared.” Hitoshi’s out of breath now, but the lack of oxygen only fuels him. He lifts his voice modulator.
“I like you, Shinsou,” he says in Denki’s voice, and Denki’s eyes drop to the ground. Hitoshi lowers the modulator. “I believed it when you said that, too. And look where that got me.” His hand clenches in a fist at his side and tears prick at the back of his eyes.
“I could kill you right now,” Denki says, his voice so low that Hitoshi almost doesn’t hear him. As soon as he does, though, he wishes he hadn’t. “Electrocute you and Aizawa and find a way to get free once you’re dead.”
“Do it, then. What’s stopping you?” Hitoshi grits his teeth to keep his lip from trembling. Denki would kill them. Kill him.
“I don’t…want to.” He sounds so resigned, and Hitoshi blows out a shaky breath.
“That’s reassuring,” he says, hoping the dark humor will help dispel some of the ache in his chest. It doesn’t, but Denki laughs, a real laugh, and Hitoshi’s breath comes in a little easier this time. 
Maybe, somewhere in the depths of his imagination, he can pretend Denki’s going to break down and tell them it was all a ruse, just a clever manipulation and he’s really one of the good guys, he really is a hero. And maybe there’s absolutely no reason Hitoshi could even begin to justify that hope inside his head, but it refuses to leave him alone.
“This was never…it was never about UA, or class 1A or Aizawa or any of them,” Denki says, and Hitoshi looks up to find him staring at his shoes. “It wasn’t even about you, not at first.” Hitoshi stops himself from interrupting - information, that’s what they need. That’s what he did this for, to save people. He can still be a hero, even if he couldn’t save-
No, he won’t give up on Denki yet. He can’t, it would break something inside him to do that.
“Why, then? Why all of this?” He waves a hand in Denki’s direction. Were we not enough to change you? Was I not enough? He can’t ask that, though. He can’t even begin to consider hearing Denki say that he wasn’t.
“I had to keep myself safe, keep my family safe,” Denki says to the floor. The chair creaks as he leans forward, his hair falling to block his face. “I thought…I thought I wouldn’t care.”
Hitoshi stills at the words. Did he care, then? 
“I thought…it’d be easy to do whatever was asked of me - and no, I don’t know who it was, the whole thing was anonymous.” Denki’s staring hard at him now, but Hitoshi can’t come up with any words. “I didn’t think-” he pauses, then his gaze softens. “I wasn’t there to make friends.”
Hitoshi blows out a breath - the same thing he’d said to Denki from day one.
“Maybe you shouldn’t have.” He means it as a joke, almost. Almost, except for the gaping hole left in his chest after Denki’s betrayal. Almost, except for the memory of raucous laughter turning soft as Denki leaned closer to Hitoshi. Almost, except that Hitoshi had been willing to hand his heart over. Almost, except Denki had run away and left it broken.
“I thought I could protect you too,” Denki says, and he sounds almost as shattered as Hitoshi feels. “They said they’d keep you safe, and I believed them.” Hitoshi squeezes his eyes shut, desperately fighting back the wave of tears that threaten to overwhelm him.
It takes several moments too long, but he manages to shove them back down, and he takes a deep breath as he opens his eyes. Denki’s still staring at his feet, and Hitoshi wants nothing more than to lift his chin, to tell him things will turn out okay in the end. That he doesn’t need to worry, Hitoshi is a hero and he’ll keep Denki safe now.
But it’s Denki’s fault they’re in this mess. A real hero would see that, wouldn’t they?
“You put the entire world at risk to keep me safe?” He hopes his tone comes off angry - hell, he should’ve just switched on his modulator and flipped to Bakugou’s voice. That’d have done better than letting his own words betray how hurt he is right now.
Denki just blows out a breath of bitter laughter.
“I know this might sound selfish,” he shakes his head and lifts it just enough to catch Hitoshi’s eye, “unheroic, even, but I don’t care about the world.” Hitoshi clenches his jaw. “I only care about you, Hitoshi, I just wanted to keep you safe.” He shakes his head, leaning back in the chair. “You have no idea what’s coming.”
Hitoshi does his best to ignore everything Denki’s saying, everything that isn’t useful. Emotions aren’t useful, not right now.
“What’s coming, then? What do we need to protect ourselves from?” He takes a few steps closer, hoping it comes across as intimidating.
“I don’t know, they won’t tell me, but it’s big, Hitoshi…” He exhales a slow breath, and Hitoshi watches the line of his throat as he swallows. “I don’t know if we’ll make it.”
Hitoshi startles at the tears pooling in Denki’s eyes - he’s never been one to cry, as far as Hitoshi’s ever known, but that alone is enough to set his heart racing. Something big, something Denki’s not sure they’ll survive…
“We just gotta stick together and we’ll be fine!” Hitoshi says into his modulator, and it comes out as Denki’s voice - sure, they had just been training, it was just practice, there wasn’t a real threat like there is now, but those words had helped him then and maybe they can help Denki now.
Maybe he can still figure this out, maybe he can still bring Denki back to the right side. Maybe it’s not that Denki doesn’t care, but that he cared far too much. And maybe Hitoshi cares far too much, too.
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vinciaka · 4 years
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KALEIDOSCOPE: a project by DAYE
my dear friend serge aka daye just sent a full project for me to listen through before the release of it. It moved me so much that i couldn’t sleep without trying my very best to explain how listening to this made me feel, cause it made me feel very much, all 7 tracks. i want to (try to) explain to you how each song made me feel.
a little quick thing to know before you read this: i tend to reach a lot, and in this little post here, i will try to explain how i saw these songs and the conceptual interpretations i made. they’re probably wrong and might not have been the artist’s true intentions when making the songs,  but songs are more fun if you listen to them in your own way. oh !warning! my “review” or whatever might be very biased lol okay
where were we? oh right, the feels. I feel like it made perfect sense to name this project KALEIDOSCOPE, because just like the real thing, daye reflects both his personal life and producing essence in his music and it creates this beautiful art that transforms into another masterpiece depending on how you decide to look at(/listen to) it. he has used things like audio clips from moments in his life, sounds of a cassette player being opened/closed, voices of friends with his (oh so) suitable voice to enhance theirs, and his own voice as main focus (spoiler: my fav song is where he raps the outro... stay tuned xo). It all results in a beautiful memoir, that i felt was focusing on the things surrounding him, perceived by serge and translated by daye into these songs.
the first song ROLLIN sucked me in with the very calming cheerful melody. the song features rapper mike jones that tells a story about a cute blossoming affection between two people who both seem too shy to come forward about it. the story is accompanied with beautiful inputs of shorter melodies created with something that sounds like a very pianoy electric guitar (comes in around 1:46). this song really shows dayes talent when it comes to creating melodies and layering the same melody with different sounds. we hear everything from violin sounds, to synths, backed by fabulous kicks and claps and hi-hats and tambourines and... you get it. he pays a lot of attention to details and it shows through the very subtle sounds of “plings” and his own “so now we” voice input. the beat is concluded with a beautiful piano outro played by one of his friends and puts a more “ripened love”(lol) denouement to the cutesy lovey dovey mood introduced in the beginning of the song. it ends with an audio clip talking about rolling....the green (or brown) stuff. This song feels: buoyant, calm, blissful, bubbly, cute.
the second track BADBOY (also my second favorite song) is just pure, fantastic, simple yet detailed quality production. this song feels like taking an evening walk in the inner city when everything is about to close during warmer weather & meeting up with fun adventurous friends. the drum loop is just so beautifully chosen and is the highlight of the song to me. the second name of this song should be SYNTHBOY (sry). the thing is, i usually don’t like synthy sounds, but daye chooses his sounds so perfectly and breaks it off with complementary non-expected sounds, and the result is... my second favorite track. the outro is a fun audio clip where his friends are joking around. The song really gives me both summer night and summer day and summer day vibes. This song feels: sunny, refreshing, cresent-moony, breezy
next song SWAGOO is my personal favorite. wow.. just wow. i would divide the song into 3 parts and i mean… 3 parts? ugh daye’s mind! the first part is a sample of a song with vocals that go “your love, your love, your love” and it’s a great introduction to the theme of the song. Next part we’re introduced to a very soothing R&B electric piano feel that was quickly accompanied by a  very minimalistic, clean kick, snare and hi-hat. once again, rapper mike jones is featured and this time tells a story that seems to continue on where he left off in ROLLIN. but this time he’s ready to settle down. the whole minimalistic instrumental through the second part gave off the good feelings of liking someone and being really sure about the whole thing. but i realized that it all was a false feeling of comfort when the second part was cut off into an audio clip. the audio clip is from a video featured by yours truly (lol) & other friends and is from a house party both me and daye were at at some time in april 2019. in the audio clip you can hear us singing to self control by frank ocean, and the part daye chose to add just makes so much sense and is so fitting into the story. it was the part where frank says “i came to visit, cause you see me like a ufo”. after mike jones spoke about being ready to settle down into the relationship, it seems like it all fell off, just like what that part in frank’s song hints at. two people falling off. right after the audio clip, i was hit by what gave me kind of a revelation, kind of an unreligious epiphany… the third and final part of the song. the last part lasts for 30 seconds and that’s what i dislike the most about this project, because to me that last part is the highlight of this tape. daye uses his own voice (!!) in a gloomy way with a sullen beautiful instrumental that i was amazed by. that part of the song is what fits my personal music taste the most. its crazy. the goal of trying to write all of this down instead of reviewing it directly to serge was to give me a chance to fully express how i felt about this project, but still this part gives me a hard time to explain how wonderfully divine it was. his vocals concludes the love story that mike told. the love interest was just “bad news” and the whole thing left daye in a slump. this whole song is just a wonderful story about love that fades when the mutual feelings stop being mutual and daye portrayed it beautifully through merging 3 different parts and leveling it out to create one harmonious song. excellent. i wish i could replay those last 30 seconds over and over again. in the very end, you hear the sound of a cassette player opening, welcoming the next song. This song feels: jolly -> hopeful->surprising->gloomy, amazing, rainy
track 4 and 5 i will review together as one part. first we hear SMILLAS INTERLUDE and then we hear TIMELESS, both have beautiful melodies and lyrics sung by serges friend smilla. the interlude is just different cuts of her voice singing some words, but mostly overwhelmingly beautiful runs. wow what a voice. in between the cuts of her voice daye carries on the theme with cassette player opening/closing sounds. the interlude almost sounds like the process of writing a letter with drafts and parts that both are kept and thrown away but that in the end results in a fully written letter, and that’s what TIMELESS is. if deciding to look at this project as one big storyline where all songs are small pieces of a bigger story, the lyrics in TIMELESS seem like an explanation to why the love was “bad news”. the whole intention of the relation seemed to be confusing and not straight to the point, a “timeless haze” as told by smilla. the best point of this song, the music production by daye, made it feel like everything still was alright. the beat felt like a hug, saying that the confusion is okay. it felt like a rainy summer day. bright outside with gray skies and a rainbow. the song is fully nuanced because all of the elements in it. everything has more than one layer. the drums, the synths, the vocals. during the chorus, a simple bassline is added to the instrumental and it gives the song a whole new layer of depth. the mixing of this song is the best in my opinion. This song feels: reassuring, confidently confusing, self focusing, profound, like a kiss on the forehead.
the second last song of this tape, COMING HOME shares the spot together with BADBOY as my second favorite track. the production is just so spectacular and high quality! i love it. the drum loop hits hard throughout the whole song and once again, daye’s ears made my ears a big favor by choosing it. his talent with finding and picking out the best sounds & layering was really noticable in this song and it all feels like a whole majestic musical arrangement more than just a beat. it feels like the last day of summer. the melody created by the bass, synths and other sound effects makes the song feel like a sad farewell, but affirming of that better days will come. To further push the feeling of that this is a goodbye, we once again have the talented mike jones lifting the song even more with his added lyrics about “coming home”. between mike’s verses, i was blessed with a beautiful guitar solo played by daye’s talented friend edvin. i had a hard time choosing, but the point of this song is the drum loop and the bassline. listening to the project as a whole, it feels like this is the last song of the project even if isn’t. This song feels: elevating, reminiscent, bittersweet, concluding
like i said above, COMING HOME feels like the last song. but now, we have come to the official last song: INTRO2PHASE2. what im about to say, the title already hints on it. this song sticks out the most to me and it is made very obvious the first two seconds of the song with a very intense synth sound that differs from any synth throughout the whole project. the music composition differs a lot too and is no longer soft and summery but rather upbeat, more intense and less... lovey. it was impossible not to move your head along to the beat. What i like the most about this song is that it shows a whole different side of daye and portrays his versatility when it comes to production. whichever genre he decides to approach he does perfectly and leaves his fingerprints scattered all over the finished product, so it still sounds like daye.  this feels more like an intro to the next concept more than outro to this tape, and that is why the song before this was (to me) the last song of this project (or should i say phase?). mike (who is featured here too) also uses his voice in a more powerful way compared to the more relaxed/soft way that is heard in the other songs he is in. if it still isn’t obvious that this is an intro to the switch of concepts, it is made even more clear with mike’s unfinished sentence where he says he doesn’t want drama, he wants-... to be continued i guess! This song feels: intense, like fire, stinky face, hard
 im excited for what’s next to come, and curious about where the focus will shift in the next project. daye left us with a cliffhanger, and hopefully, in the future we will know what it was that mike jones wanted instead of drama.
to summarize, this project felt very conceptual even if intentional or not, the order of the songs made sense if you were to look at it as a whole story. generally, it sounds like the theme is love; from its exciting beginnings to the end of it (and maybe the rebound too?) in a very realistic way. all songs can be seen as one big coherent story, or as individual songs and which one you see depends on how you want to look at it through the KALEIDOSCOPE. This project feels like: love, summer, a story
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mygnolia · 2 years
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hello ren! i saw your post esrlier and i just wanted to say that you're not 'conceited' to feel that way :( i know the mentality about accomplishing high number of notes may not seem like the best one to have, hell it even makes people feel like a narcissist when you think about it :(
but personally? i think it's normal to feel that way. i think the feeling of not having enough happens to even the best of us — and that's okay! you are not a narcissist for feeling these things, it's perfectly normal!
i know sometimes you just can't help but feel that way, you know? it feels as if the amount of notes count as validation that your works are good and worth-reading. and at certain times and when you see the difference between you and other writers, you feel like you're not doing enough.
although i don't think it's about you not being enough (bcuz your works are literally so??? fine??? WHY CAN'T I SPAM MY FAVORITE POST WITH LOVE?? TUMBLR HUH), there are many other factors like exposure and different interests in fandoms or types of works (hcs, series, smaus, etc) because ain't no way people aren't reading your works because it's bad quality or smth?? LIARS ALL OF YOU 🤥 so i don't think the inadequacy is within you, i just think all readers have different types of preferences BUT that doesn't change that i've been following you for a while and i think it'll stay that way forever :D
but all i wanna say is that please don't let these things discourage you! and also that the way you feel is normal and valid, you are a human being just like the rest of us and we have times where we feel low :( but just know for those who have read your works and left a note, your works are THE ABSOLUTE WORLD for us. even though we may not seem many in your eyes BUT MAN I LOVE IT WHEN YOU POST!!
i am one but many, i can only count as one note/few notes but your works really do mean the world to me... and i feel a bit sad that you are feeling this way. like you're not doing enough... but for me, i think you are. you are doing enough.
maybe it'll take a little bit more time until you finally feel at peace with where you're standing and until that happens, take your time. write for you, write so you feel happy rambling about it, write so you can scream about it with your friends/mooties, write for your happiness. i don't want you to write for your readers — but instead, write for yourself and you feel willing to share it with us! i think that's how writers work; they write for themselves and they share this idea with other people who might or might not like it! and that's ok, we can't please everyone but still it means that there are people who love your works, right? how about we focus on them then! i hope that makes sense :(
don't let mere notes define why you're here, you have readers and even moots who are willing to support you at the drop of a pin! and i know there's not that many of us, but you sure are everything to us ❤️
- weird sappy anon who loves you (really sry for rambling but i just want you to know... you don't have to answer this ask! as long as you read it, then i'm happy :D /gen)
ARGH im going to tear up :( i will answer the rest of this under a read more so it's not too long and personal
HONESTLY it sucks to sit here and look at how well a post is doing bc sometimes yknow i just wanna see if ppl like it or if they want more and stuff so yeah it does make me feel bad or conceited in a way when i look at it
i do wanna try and get rid of it and whether it means being more content with what im putting out to be able to not pay attention to notes, or just not getting affected by it, i just wanna get a better mentality and i never rlly equated it to 'being enough' so that opened a window for me
yeah u basically said it- notes do feel like validation and when i see ppl get hundreds of notes i wonder what i do wrong a LOT urgh :(
also bls im SHY im glad u like my writing AHH yeah i understand that more popular fandoms or members will get more notes or people who have been here longer might do better
and readers have different preferences too! I understand that as i myself enjoy longfics and on enhablr those can be a bit hard to come across
honestly looking at reblogs or comments where people say even little things like "I loved this" or "this was rlly nice to read" or things about the characters GAHH it rlly makes me happy yknow- and u mean the absolute world to me too anonnie :(( you enjoying what i put out and sending me this ask just rlly made my day argh i need tissues BYE
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aliciavspinnet · 7 years
Text
i was tagged by @owvlery (thank yeee)(for this but also i am enjoying ur anon hour with the coffee theme cause lol)  >tagging @fjrebolt @mollyprewett @nexvilles @artemxis @fleurrdelacour @jilys  @jamespottuh @dementvr and anyone else who would like to complete these funky questions (tag me)(so i can intrude on ur personal lives plz) 🐝rules: complete the survey and say who tagged you in the beginning. when you’re finished, tag people to do this survey. have fun and enjoy! 1: are you named after someone? nopity nope  2: when was the last time you cried? erm i suddenly can’t remember anything in life (maybe within the last week)(like i saw at least one movie i am fairly certain i cried in)  3: do you like your handwriting? ya (altho i get annoyed when trying to do artsy stuff sometimes cause i tend to slope up or down when there r no lines to draw on)(that’s not really handwriting tho more like my ability to write in a straight line idk)  4: what is your favourite lunch meat? this is a weird question – chicken? is this meant to be for in a sandwich? or just meat u like for lunch? (all i can think of is how i hate most meat people put in sandwiches so idk) (i’m probably gonna be a vegetarian some day lol)(even tho that’s a stupid idea cause i’m low on iron)(idk stay tuned)  5: do you have kids? hahahahahhaaa nope i am still a kid (tho not legally)(cries)(i have had to fill out too many forms recently)(i don’t like being responsible someone halp)  6: if you were another person, would you be friends with you? yes i’m freaking amazing (lol idk it might get boring if we were like clones cause we’d have exactly the same ideas) (or would that be interesting) (who the frick knows?)  7: do you use sarcasm? lol m8 who do u think i am? ofc 
8: do you still have your tonsils? yeappo 9: would you bungee jump? i like the idea of thrills like i am an adventurer and thrill seeker but heights r a nono for me like i struggle going up the sky tower and stuff so i probably wouldn’t be able to get to the platform but i feel like it’d be a sick life experience tho  10: what is your favourite kind of cereal? there is this stuff called berry berry nice and i loved it as a child and still love it (also weet bix is a must have in the pantry also)  11: do you untie your shoes when you take them off? i do atm i go thro stages (i am a capable human rn)   12: do you think you’re a strong person? i am weak but not weak willed (altho my mind is a sieve) (but like i am strong in character i reckon) (just don’t ask me to lift heavy objects) (plz) (my arms will snap) 13: what is your favourite ice cream flavour? cookies n cream can take my soul (but also with rly fancy ice cream u gotta love like mango sorbets and stuff)  14: what is the first thing you notice about people? um? i’ll get back to u i sorta don’t really know – i mean i guess their general appearance if i meet them in person ??  16: what is the least favourite physical thing you like about yourself? my crappy skin can go screw itself ty  17: what colour pants and shoes are you wearing now? lol i just woke up i have no pants or shoes on (funny story i just went into the kitchen to get an apricot (yum) and then there was a random man in our garden (i think he is here to fix the pool filter) and he looked like he was gonna try and come in and talk to someone about our filter but i didn’t want to interact with him pantless so i ran past the window cause also if he saw me he’d expect interaction)  19: what are you listening to right now? melanie martinez is rocking my new stereo (or boombox)(lol i love that word)  20: if you were a crayon, what colour would you be? i don’t care about the colour but i want a pretentious name (like idk mermaid mania but it’s just a nice blue for the sea)(okay i looked up crayon colour names and i wanna be Permanent Geranium Lake)(it’s red)(wtf)  21: favourite smell? ahhh help!! how do i chose (i’m just gonna list off a few) cinnamon, lavender, the sea, vanilla,  22: who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? my mum’s friend who answered the phone when my mum was driving and it was a very awkward conversation (and i still brought a crappy plate holder because of it)(whyyy)  23: favourite sport to watch? waterpolo probs cause i used to play and i love it  24: hair color? like a light brown ? (i wanna dye it pink)(like bright pink)(it could look terrible but i sorta wanna do it)  25: eye colour? like brown but also could be hazel cause there is a little green tint sometimes  26: do you wear contacts? when i rly need to see and i wanna swim or soemthing (but i have to be desperate)(they suck the life outta my eyes and general being)  27: favourite food to eat? apple crumble is my go to for this question cause it’s my true love  28: scary movies or comedy? quality of movie not genre is what i judge by (also depends what mood i’m in)(but i’m up for both)  29: last movie you watched? la la land (wozah)  30: what colour of shirt are you wearing? urm it’s a alice through the looking glass shirt (i still haven’t seen the movie)(but i love the books)(and someone brought it for me)(and it’s the perfect pajama top) it’s white but there is blue on it too
31: summer or winter? gimme that long summer break with the beach and the sun !! (it’s officially summer now guys btw)(cause the shape of my bikini has been completely seared onto my body)(whoops: how not to be sunsafe with kate)  32: hugs or kisses? gimme them hugs plz  33: what book are you currently reading? too many books i h8 myself  34: who do you miss right now? my best friend has been away (and away from wifi) for a bit and i miss talking to her  35: what is on your mouse pad? lol (no mousepad sry kiddos)  36: what is the last tv program you watched? friends ? maybe ? i think i watched an episode when my friend came over recently  37: what is the best sound? woww this is harddd i love weird laughs honestly everyone laugh is so so precious also i love the sounds of nature and summer and the beach (also music is a quality sound)  38: rolling stones or the beatles? aghjsdk okay well i love both but the beatles and i have a longer history so i’m gonna have to choose the good ol sargent pepper’s lonely heart’s club band  39: what is the furthest you have ever traveled? aussie (it’s gonna be a shook to the system when i have to be on a plane any longer than 3 hours)  40: do you have a special talent? i won the last catch a marshmellow in ur mouth competition against my siblings? and i am the master of do everything the last minute (idk)(i’m pretty good at reading people i guess?)  41: where were you born? haha here (nz)(oh and let’s pretend it wasn’t hamilton)
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