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companionjones · 4 years

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Love In The City

Pairings: Seth Meyers x Stefon, Leslie Jones x Colin Jost

Fandom: Saturday Night Live

Summary: Some friends go out for drinks, but a conflict erupts.

Warnings: Curses, Leslie Jones, many sexual references

*******

“Jeez, it’s almost been an hour. Where are they?” Michael Che questioned Amy Poehler.

She shrugged, “Who knows? Maybe they finally killed each other.”

“Oh, shut up you sensual snow storm on Christmas day,” Leslie Jones complimented Colin Jost as the two of them entered the bar.

Che commented upon spotting the couple, “Nope. Haven’t killed each other yet. S’up, Colin?” he greeted his friend.

“S’up, Che?” Colin returned, using the same tone that Michael did. Which, let’s just say, wasn’t Colin’s usual style.

Michael put a stop to it. “No. No. Stop that now.”

Colin winced, “Yeah, sorry.”

Leslie and Colin took their seats at the table Amy and Michael were at.

“Sorry we’re late, guys.” Leslie explained, “We were busy doing some paddy whack.” She smirked at her partner.

Colin cleared his throat and tried to hide his blush. “Come on, Leslie. They don’t need to know about that.”

Leslie smacked her lips. “Oh baby, you know Mama’s just excited. She wants the whole world to know that we do the do, you white, sexy version of Urkel.”

More to himself than anyone else, Colin mumbled, “Why Urkel?”

Amy Poehler decided to change the subject. “So Leslie, how are you doing since you left SNL?”

“Oh, I’m doing great, Amy. I have this new audio series coming out with John Cena.”

Michael nodded, “Yeah, I heard about that. What’s it about?”

“I’m telling you, gorgeous,” a new voice entered the bar. “This place has everything: hobos, orphans, that fitted sheet you just can’t get to stay on your bed.”

The strange man’s husband, Seth Meyers reasoned, “Okay, we can go there later tonight. But let’s just hang out with our friends for now.”

Stefon agreed, “Sure, but we have to get there soon, they close as soon as their owner, Sarah Silverman’s vagina, gets arrested. And, trust me, it’s coming.”

Meyers nodded vaguely to respond to his husband while they took their seats. “Hey guys, hey Amy,” he addressed the others at the table, “How’s everyone been?”

They all gave their answers, then everyone ordered.

“So,” began Amy, “Stefon, I heard you’re getting back into writing. Any projects yet?”

“No,” was Seth’s immediate, dismissive answer.

Stefon contradicted, “Yes, actually.”

“Oh,” Michael tried to encourage, “What is it?”

“You don’t want to know,” warned Seth.

The former tourism correspondent replied, “It’s this flick about two step-brothers trying to find their way as they moved to the city together.”

Michael endorsed, “That doesn’t sound bad at all. Seth, why are you so stressed about that?”

The late night show host bluntly answered, “It’s a porno,” just before taking a sip from his coffee.

Amy and Michael voiced their sudden distaste.

“Well,” encouraged Leslie, almost pervertedly, “Don’t stop there.”

Colin hesitantly agreed, “Yeah. I’d like to know how fast it goes from that to...porn.”

Jones turned her head to Jost. “Shut up,” she instructed without batting an eye.

“Oh, thank God,” Amy sighed, “Food’s here.”

The six ate in silence for a minute or two before conversation started up again. Luckily, the atmosphere wasn’t as hostile as it had been before.

“Remember that, Che?” Colin laughed, “It smelled so bad!”

Michael chuckled, “You don’t have to remind me. I felt bad for Aidy and Kate. They were the one’s holding it.”

Everyone had stories to tell.

Amy, for instance, couldn’t catch her breath at one point because she was laughing too hard. “And...and Lorne hadn’t even shown up yet, but we were all losing it because of that stupid newscaster skit.”

“We didn’t even end up doing it!” exclaimed Seth in a fit of laughter.

Meanwhile, as everyone else was giggling, Leslie leaned over to Stefon. “I hate when they start talking like this. It’s like they all have some sort of bond because they were all anchors on Weekend Update.”

“I know,” Stefon rolled his eyes, “You should see Seth when we get home. He brings up things that are wildly different from the actual subject of the conversation.”

Leslie nodded, “I get what you’re saying. You know what? We don’t need this. You know any good clubs near here?”

“I know plenty,” assured Stefon.

The two got up to leave.

“Whoa, wait. Where are you guys going?” questioned Colin.

Stefon answered enthusiastically, “We’ve had enough of your bullshit!”

“What?” Seth disputed.

Michael bewilderedly repeated, “Bullshit?”

“Yeah!” Articulated Leslie, “If you ‘Weekend Update’-ers want to keep carrying on like good ol’ pals, that’s fine with us. We’ll be out actually enjoying ourselves. I am a strong, independent, fine black woman. I do not need to take this!”

Stefon exclaimed, “Yeah!” as if every word Leslie said applied to him.

The two outlandish characters left the bar.

“Oh no,” Colin worriedly voiced.

Seth sighed. He was used to that particular situation. “Come on, let’s go after them.”

“What? No,” disagreed Amy, “They freaked out for no reason. They’re in the wrong here.”

Both Colin and Seth got out of their seats--much to Amy and Michael’s surprise.

Jost swallowed, “I don’t know...Were we too rude? Should we have included them more?”

Seth put his arm on Colin’s shoulder to try and council the man. “Hey. We don’t worry about that stuff now. What we do now is we go after them.”

Colin nodded, “Okay.”

“Why?” wondered a confused Michael Che. “Why would you go after them? Come to think of it, why even be in a relationship with them in the first place?”

Colin Jost was suddenly protective of his girlfriend, “Listen, Che--”

“Whoa there,” Seth almost had to hold Colin back. “Sorry guys, but we have to go. Let’s do this again.” Meyers paid for everyone, then he and Jost were out of there.

Out on the street, Jost turned to the more experienced man when it came to dating crazy people. “How the hell are going to find them? Do you have any ideas where Leslie and Stefon would go?”

“Hang on.” Seth stopped to think. “Let’s see. Stef was pissed, and when he’s pissed he wants to dance...He was in a tequila and Pepsi Fire mood...We’re on 43rd and 6th...Duck!”

Colin immediately plunged his whole body downward. “What?! Why?!”

“No, ‘Duck!’ The club. I know where they are.” Seth hailed a cab.

Ten minutes later, Seth and Colin pulled Stefon and Leslie out of the EDM club.

“Okay, okay! We’re out. What do you boys want?” Stefon took a sip from a drink of his own invention.

Leslie was less compliant. “Get your hands of me,” she ordered.

Colin backed off.

“Look, guys. We’re sorry,” conceded Seth.

Stefon played dumb. “Sorry about what?”

Again, Seth sighed, “Sorry about ignoring you at the bar.”

“Oh, you did?” tested Stefon, “I didn’t notice.”

Seth chuckled, “You didn’t?”

Stefon barely took a break from his drink. “Nope.”

“Not at all?” teased Seth.

The club-goer shook his head, but he was trying to hide a smile.

Seth scoffed tauntingly, “Yeah, right,” before moving to kiss his husband.

Colin looked to Leslie.

She wasn’t taking it. “Nope. Don’t even try that stuff with me.” Leslie started walking away.

Colin went after her again. “Leslie! I’m sorry.”

“Mmhm, sure you are,” was Leslie’s sarcastic response.

Colin sighed, “I am! You know I could never consciously make you feel like that.”

Leslie just eyed the man.

“Hey, I am sorry. That’s just how I am sometimes...You know me, baby. I’m forgetful.” Colin decided to push his luck with the nickname.

Fortunately, it made Leslie smile, “Yeah I know, you pineberry covered in white chocolate that I’m gonna eat for dinner.”

Inwardly, Colin sighed, happy he was back in his girlfriend’s good graces. “Good. Now how about we go back to my place and we make an Oreo with your thighs and my head.”

“Oo, Colin. I’m rubbing off on you, aren’t I?”

He just smirked, “I hope you will be later tonight.”

*******

Author’s Note: Thank you so much for reading! Fill up that heart and reblog if you liked it. I also would love a comment if you have the time. If you would like to read more, I have more fics about SNL over on my page. You should go check it out. Also, REQUESTS ARE OPEN. I take requests for one-shots, drabbles, multi-chapters, headcannons and preferences. No smut, please. I write for a variety of fandoms. If you’re wondering if I write for a specific fandom, please ask me. Have a nice day, night, or whatever time it is for you.<3

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cdt12345 · 3 years

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We've been friends many years but I've never thought to ask; Top 10 gay OTPs?

1.) Ian & Mickey (Gallavich) - Shameless us

What can I say about these two that we haven’t already said about them?! They are my absolute all-time favorite couple ever! Gay or straight. They perfectly complement each other, they love each other on a level I feel like I’ve never seen before (and I have watched a lot of tv/movies), they’re like a comedy duo, they support each other, understand each other better than anyone else ever will, they fell in love as kids, they bring out the best in each other, and they’re each other's best friend. I’m a sucker for opposites attract, who are also best friends. Gallavich really fits that bill. I wish they didn’t have to struggle so much to get their happiness, but I’m happy they finally got it. When they got married, it felt like the biggest victory ever! We went through those years of struggle with them, rooted for them, mourned for them when John Wells let Noel go after season 5. So much has tried to keep these two apart, even real-life circumstances tried to keep them apart. The chemistry between these two characters and between Cameron and Noel was so powerful, they were brought back to the show. That kind of thing doesn’t happen very often. When an actor leaves a show, they don’t usually come back as a series regular, let alone two actors who have already left the show. It felt like a miracle! I will never forget getting the news that Noel was coming back from you @luckyshazmrsmonaghansblog I was crying with happiness bc we wanted this for so long and I never believed we would get to see both Cameron and Noel back on the show. Or that they would get their happy ending outside of a jail cell. Especially after Cameron left the show in season 9. With their return we got a wedding, an entire season of them as a married couple, we got to see them dance with each other twice, we got them singing together, we got to see them start a lucrative business together, we got to see them free and happier than we’ve ever seen them before, and we got to see Terry get what he deserved after putting them through hell. We are only halfway through season 11, but I already feel so fulfilled with this extra time with gallavich that we were never supposed to have. JW tried to take that away from us. I will never understand why, but he failed. I am not surprised this is the one I wrote the most about. I can go on and on about gallavich!

2.) David and Patrick - Schitt’s Creek

This was everything I ever wanted to see onscreen, where there was zero homophobia. The pansexual character didn’t need to have a big coming out or tell everyone in the town of his sexual orientation, except his best friend. The gay character had a coming out with parents who loved and accepted him for who he is and was only upset that he felt he couldn’t tell them sooner. I dreamt of a day where I could see this kind of representation onscreen. The casual treatment of their sexuality was so refreshing and something I’ve been waiting for. There is no darkness or huge struggle they had to overcome to be together or a sad ending for them. They were allowed to be together without the major conflicts most LGBTQ characters have to go through. Once David made the first move Patrick was comfortable allowing himself to fall for David and start a relationship with him. He was so sure of his feelings for David after that first kiss, he never looked back and I loved that. They had such an adorable love story. Truly one I have been waiting to see for so long between two LGBTQ characters. They made me smile every time they were on screen. They are another of my OTPs that are exact opposites who complement each other perfectly. Patrick was welcomed into David’s family and blended in with them so well, even when he and David had very different upbringings. Patrick serenading David with Tina Turner and then Mariah Carey at their wedding is one of the most romantic things I have ever seen!

3.) Holt and Kevin - Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Captain Holt and Kevin are strange men on their own but together they are the perfect pair. They get each other in a way no one else does. The best part is their adorable fur baby, Cheddar! They seriously make the cutest family! I was so nervous when they went through a rough patch for a while because I didn’t want them to split up. Thankfully, they made it through and are still going strong!

4.) Will and Vince - Will & Grace

On the show's first run, Will and Vince were in a serious relationship and Vince was Will’s longest relationship on the show. They broke up a few times but were together by the series finale. The two reunite during the funeral of Will's father. There was a time jump on the series finale. Though I didn’t love everything about the last episode, I did love the fact that Will and Vince had been together for 20 years and raised a son together, who was conceived through in vitro fertilization with a surrogate. After the time jump, nearly twenty years later, their son goes to college and meets Grace's daughter, whom he would eventually marry. Though I wasn’t happy with the fact that Will and Grace didn’t stay close over the years, it did allow for their kids to one day meet, fall in love, and get married. I did like that outcome out of the finale. My family and I used to watch the original show, but we refused to accept or watch the 2017 revival because they completely changed everything from the original series finale. The second I found out they were changing everything; I knew I couldn’t watch it. They even wiped the existence of their kids from the first series finale. The revival was an attempt to cash in on the reboot craze and I wasn’t happy about that already, but even more so when they were going to break up one of my OTPs for easy money. Bobby Cannavale, who played Vince, has become even more famous since starring in Will & Grace. So, I already figured he wouldn’t be back for the show as a regular, but I know he did guest star. I won’t accept the revival and to me, Will and Vince stayed together, and their son married Grace’s daughter. THE END!

5.) Albert and Armand - The Birdcage

Miss Albert and Armand were the earliest gay couple I remember ever watching onscreen when I was eight years old. I have watched this movie more than I can count over the years. It is a family favorite that we quote often. Their son is planning to marry a girl whose father is in politics and is very conservative. They have to hide the fact that he has two gay fathers for one night, but everything goes awry, and comedy ensues. Nathan Lane and Robin Williams give a wonderful performance without resorting to using the stereotypes that are often used on gay characters, especially back then. It’s a classic!

6.) Stefon and Seth - Saturday Night Live

Okay, hear me out on this one! They’re not the most conventional OTPs on my list, but I really do love them so much! Stefon started doing a correspondent segment on Weekend Update on SNL. The first time Stefon came on, he flirted with Seth Meyers. The second he did I was like ooh they would make a cute couple! Stefon the wild party guy and Seth the serious news anchor. It was a match made in heaven for me. Before Seth Meyers left SNL to do Late Night with Seth Meyers, Bill Hader came back to play Stefon for Seth’s last episode. I didn’t expect what happened next to happen at all! They gave Seth and Stefon the ending that I haven’t even gotten from some actual scripted shows. I never expected Stefon and Seth to have this big ending, but I could not be happier that they did. I’m posting the link to the six-minute skit/ending and I hope it works. It’s worth watching. Though the video says it’s Stefon’s farewell it was really Seth’s farewell episode.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rj-wYWMdWNk

7.) Mr. Simmons and Peter - Hey Arnold!

Anyone who grew up watching this show already knew that Mr. Simmons, Arnold’s teacher, was probably gay. It was hinted at in the Thanksgiving episode. Arnold and Helga visit Mr. Simmons on Thanksgiving at his house and his family and “friend” Peter are there. Mr. Simmons mother says she didn’t know Peter was coming to dinner and Peter responds with the infamous line “There’s a lot of things you don’t know.” When Mr. Simmons mom tries to get him to take a woman friend to the ballet, he says he loves the ballet and Peter gives him a disapproving look and Mr. Simmons immediately declines. Those were enough hints for us fans to decide Peter was his boyfriend. Years later, the show's creator Craig Bartlett finally confirmed Mr. Simmons is gay and had them together in the 2017 Hey Arnold: The Jungle Movie. It was so exciting to finally get the confirmation years later, even though I was already certain of it for many years. I was happy that the cartoon no longer had to settle with vague hints about it.

8.) Callie and Arizona - Grey’s Anatomy

I was very happy to see a lesbian couple on prime time tv and I really liked both characters. I was excited to root for them but sadly as most couples on this show, their relationship took a turn, and I wasn’t thrilled about it. I was disappointed that it came to an end. By then I was already getting tired of watching the show. It was starting to feel like a chore to watch it every week. I tried to stick it out because I don’t like to give up on shows in the middle of it, but I just couldn’t do it anymore. I’m glad I did though because the shocking events with Derek Shepard, is something I’m glad I wasn’t around for. Anyway, I heard things between Callie and Arizona got even worse, so I was even happier I left when I did.

9.) Sherwin and Jonathan - In a Heartbeat

This was one of the cutest things I have ever seen! I wish this got the full-length movie treatment instead of a short film. But it was still a step in the right direction for the LGBTQ community. Gay characters in cartoons always bring me such joy and that was the focus of this short. A boy with a crush on another boy with a cute ending. What is not to love?!

10.) Mitch and Cam - Modern Family

Another show I had to give up on in the middle of the series. The show began to be less funny and more annoying to me. Another reason, that really has nothing to do with the show itself, that used to annoy me was that this show repeatedly beat out Parks and Recreation during award season. Parks and Recreation is a superior show when compared to Modern Family. This show won almost every year for years and it got really annoying especially when the quality of the show started slipping and they kept winning. After a few years, they finally stopped winning all the time. But before all that, I was a fan of Cam and Mitch. They were a great couple who I loved watching on the show. They were the best part of the show most of the time. But sadly, my annoyance of the show no longer being as funny as it used to be, was enough for me to stop watching.

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