#shitty horror movie time

[movieassholes]

He's the one that gets his wish. He gets his health, I got my son back. It'll be worth it, you'll see.

Lucy Summers - Night Swim (2024)

#night swim #jodi long #eve waller #wyatt russell #gavin warren #Amélie Hoeferle #bryce mcguire #killer swimming pool #shitty horror movie time #all the tropes

[twyz]

so frankenhooker,, huh?

watching this movie was INSANE, guys. it definitely shows its 90s charm with its shitty humor and fx!! I love it dearly, but good lord, was it a lot. I wouldn't recommend watching this movie if you don't like sexual humor or horror (if u can even call it that),, but otherwise, it's entertaining!!! I had to draw her,, I absolutely her!!

also, Jeffery says, "Take it easy," waaaaay too many times, I will not be taking it easy, yall

#twyz #frankenhooker #this movie is so shitty and i LOVE IT #yet another franken-- whoever to add to my collection!! #i also experimented heavily with this piece #so theres a bunch of changes this time around!! #clip studio paint my beloved #frankenhooker 1990 #frankenstein #horror (?) #90s horror #made in ibis paint #digital art #(using this tag for reach)

[talesfromthecrypts]

Neil Newbon as Mark Griffen in Reverb (2007)

#reverb #neil newbon #nnewbonedit #horroredit #mygifs #i knew in my heart what kind of shitty 00s horror movie this was gonna be before i pressed play #and alas i did it anyway! #its so mid 00s edgy i was laughing #top 10 funniest smash cut endings all time #not to give it to em but at least saw copied music video ass editing makes sense here given the theming

[fleshadept]

The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari

(1920, dir. Robert Wiene)

#cricket gifs #watched this in shitty quality with english titles on accident the first time #then rewatched in HD with original german titles and oh my GOD #amazing film experience genuinely top 5 ever WHAT a movie #so much fun #the cabinet of dr. caligari #das cabinet des dr. caligari #userfilm #filmgifs #classic horror #horroredit

[youcallyourselfafilmcritic]

Anyway general reminder that "I hate this trend of putting children's characters into dark horror stories" is compatible with "I think the public domain is good"

#public domain #copyright #mickey mouse #steamboat willie #winnie the pooh #winnie the pooh blood and honey #disney #why are you weirdos caping for megacorps owning ideas til the end of time cause ya don't like a shitty horror movie?

[scullys-scalpel]

Halloween (1978)

Bully: Don't you know what happens on Halloween?

Tommy Doyle: Yeah, we get candy.

#halloween 1978 #horror movies #horroredit #my favorite movie of all time of any genre #its juat a masterpiece of a movie #my shitty cell phone gifs #slasher films #horrorsource #halloweenedit #classichorrorsource #filmedit

[galaxyslime]

This St. Patrick's day I learned that if you're present for a shooting and your friend looks sufficiently terrified the bartender will give you free drinks‼️

#slime speak #shooting tw #nobody died but it happened super early like 8pm and was so dumb like girl why are you discharging a firearm outside a bar kys NOW #it was scary tho the bartender locked the bar down as the crowd was running by it was like something out of a horror movie #he didnt let anyone in or out basically til the cops showed up which was ~6 minutes later #shitty response time considering they were extremely present at all the festivities

[madegeeky]

My Mom's dog does the funniest whine. I've started calling him a leaky balloon.

(I should note he's whining here because Mom dared to leave the apartment to do something real quick. I know, she's a monster.)

#geeky talks #i love this dog so damn much #(going through a rough time of it at the moment and remembered this video #look at this little squeaky balloon of a dog #what a little weirdo he is) #(i've also been watching just so many horror movies lately #y'all if i had any shame i'd be embarrassed #luckily have no shame in regards to my shitty taste in horror movies #anyway if anyone has any (bad) horror movies to rec i'll take them #i know someone rec'd me tammy and the dinosaur #or something titled similar to that #and i am planning on watching it #i just want to watch it with my sister #and she's been in final thesis hell since last year #but i do really want to watch it just waiting for the sister)

[macroglossus]

so i’ve got a big chin and obviously it’s not a feature that’s specifically discriminated against usually but similarly to a receding chin it’s also not like. something pretty much anyone has on tv or anything. which is fine for me generally bc i’m represented in a million other ways unlike a lot of people with features not seen on screens but it’s also like a little shitty to see someone with a similar feature to me being called like. robbie rotten or whatever. ANYWAY i was on reels today and there was a woman who was showing off her side profile and it was like woagh big chin appreciation that looks just like mine :) but it turned out to be the before of her plastic surgery chin reduction. which. rargh. and someone in the comment section said pretty much what i said (the initial hell yeah to ah.) which you know it’s not an online persona’s duty to live for their audiences and they’re gonna do their thing but it was a little frustrating that her response was like “i needed to make my outside match my beautiful inside <3” like. what does that mean. do you not see how that sounds brother. she also got a nose job in the same procedure so it was just double weird

#it’s so weird the features you fixate on when you’re made fun of for em a couple times bc i didn’t care/notice my chin at all until #literally middle school and after i got made fun of there jts the feature i think of the most on my face lol #and so i notice it in other people not in a shitty way just notice and i think the only media i’ve seen with someone with a chin like mine #being seen as like. a hot person is this one horror movie about a camgirl and she gets dopplegangered #googled it its literally just called cam. it weirdly had an effect on me!! #and again i’m frankly over represented in a million ways so this isn’t even huge but you know. just one of those things

[jellogram]

Oof they updated the Rotten Tomatoes top 200 horror movies of all time and... not loving these changes

#there's some good stuff that got added but also like. it feels like every recent film that scored above a 75% made the list #like it's WAY too heavy on recent stuff #Seriously how the fuck did Smile make the list? Scary stories to tell in the dark? Split? #those are some of the BEST HORROR MOVIES OF ALL TIME??? really?? #that's just straight up incorrect. shitty algorithm #the last edition felt like it was made by people but this one feels randomly generated by scores

[emile-hides]

Sometimes things happen in my life that give immediate "Oh I'm about to be the First Death in a Horror Movie" energy, and my reaction is always to call it out how lame and trope-t it is vocally and it's worked for me so far.

#I will either survive by breaking the fourth wall or die in a shitty fourth wall breaking self-aware horror film #My phone turned itself all the way off and will not turn back on no matter what I do and I'm home alone rn #And I'm just saying that's an incredibly funny reason for someone who's about to get murdered not being able to call for help #in modern era horror #No more The Phone Lines are cut #Instead it's The IPhone sometimes just shuts off for no reason and won't turn back on #I've had IPhones sense middle school and this is only the second time this has happened to me so it's not THAT common #But still it happened twice and I just think it'd be very funny for a movie to make fun of iphones like that #This isn't my only example btw a lot of horror movie tropes have happened to me

[plasticstrawsmuggler]

My best friend is the only person I'll sit through a horror movie for and I am the only person she'll go on a rollercoaster for so we're basically made for each other

#I never watch horror movies #But I watched two with her last night because she asked #and also #the velocipastor #two lesbians sit down to watch a horror movie and one spends the entire time doing a shitty impression of season 1 jon sims to cope #bed rest 2022 #grave encounters #gay shit #lesbian #sapphic

[t-800]

......Firecracker made me finally post an actual film review on letterboxd instead of my usual bullshit

#its not like ive never written anything about a movie i just never care that much to put it on letterboxd #it feels too time consuming for an app i use to go 'what shitty 80s horror movie can i watch today' #cliff.com

[andthebeanstalk]

I have been awake for so so long but like what is the message of Hellraiser (2022) ?

Like I don't need a clear moral; that is generally not a feature in a Clive Barker joint as far as I can tell

But usually there is like

An intentional subtext that I can track in one way or another.

From what I recall of the original Hellraiser film, the central character was almost like a MacBeth-type. Selling her soul and sacrificing others for her own selfish pleasure while her hairstyles got TALLER and her shoulder pads got BIGGER the more evil she got. Classic. She was 90% shoulder pad by the end of the movie. It felt more focused. The story made sense.

But Hellraiser (2022) still seems to end in a lot of innocent queer people being tortured in hell for all eternity as the (very well-acted and honestly very likeable) protagonist accepts that, hey, sometimes our gay brothers get sent to Hell because of our actions and... that is that, I guess.

She is given the chance to resurrect her brother and she turns it down.

And like, it'd be one thing if he was just dead and she chose not to resurrect him because it'd probably be fucked up in a twisted monkey paw way - Grief and regret as a form of torture that impresses even the Cenobites? That is a cool concept! I liked that! Refusing tainted gifts from unknowable and cruel beings and thus taking some control of your own narrative? Cool!

But... if her brother is not in some unknown afterlife and is in fact being eternally tortured, then her choice not to resurrect him takes on some very different tones.

I mean, the movie was effective. The monsters were scary in an unknowable existentially horrifying way. Neat.

But, like many horror stories, I came away feeling like the writers didn't think this all the way through, and so they tripped up at the end.

(Sidenote: Everyone go watch Fear Street 2021 and Candyman 2022 for examples of people not fucking this up. Check trigger lists tho. The former is gory, the latter is Heavy.)

12/10 on Lady!Pinhead tho. Loved her whole vibe and how she was framed.

The torture effects were way less abhorrent than most CGI, but I still yearn for the days of practical effects in horror. DUMP SOME FUCKIN BLOOD AND GOOP ON THE ACTORS SHOW A LITTLE HEART FOR GODSAKE

Anyway, this is just to say that if you make a horror movie with no point to it, I hope you rip your pants while you're on a date.

And if you make a BORING horror movie with no point to it, I hope you get haunted by a real-ass ghost.

And if you make a 12-hour horror series with no point, well.... I found this really cool box, and-- yeah, it's like a puzzle... no, you can hold it; try it out, see if you can solve it....

#original #Hellraiser #Hellraiser 2022 #pinhead #horror movies #i AM JOKING i do not wish death or torture on anyone for bad writing #and as for the ghost haunting you can maybe have a casper ghost. maybe one that doesn't waste people's fucking time. #sorry sorry my gf always teases me for how angry i get when things waste my time lol. it's like. the worst thing a film can be is harmful #punching down is the worst thing. BUT RIGHT BEHIND THAT IS WASTING MY TIME AND YES THIS IS MOSTLY ABOUT BLY MANOR I WILL NOT GET OVER IT #hellraiser 2022 was not boring it just felt.... either unfocused or upholding shitty ideas. or maybe i am missing something. i am deeply #deeply sleep deprived #but yeah i just feel horror can address concepts of despair without feeling like the message is Just Fucking Give Up. #esp when the concept has to do with queer death. i am not a clive barker expert but nightbreed was like.... #made during the aids epidemic and was like FUCK COPS. FIGHT AND KILL OR ELSE WE ALL SHALL BURN AND DIE. #so the ending of Hellraiser 2022 felt... bad. like nightbreed wasn't even like 'these monsters are secretly good!'. they were mostly not. #that isn't the point of it. but by god did it have some things to fucking say whether or not those things were all totally clear. #the cinematography in hellraiser 2022 was really good tho. obsessed w lady pinhead. v conflicted gay emotions over here. #like normally murder is a hard limit for me but i kinda see where the guro fans are coming from here #the only reason i get annoyed w shows and movies like this is bc they made good characters and good setups but the payoffs never #never quite work. #INSOMNIA #WOO #I LOVE SOLID THEMING. I LOVE TALKING ABOUT THEMING. I HATE BLY MANOR SO FRIKKING MUCH #horror movies be like 'oh I'm sorry - a theme? DID YOU MEAN THIS TOTALLY SICK TORTURE SCENE??' And it's like asking someone on a skateboard #'hey did you pick up dinner like you said you would?' and in lieu of an answer they just do a kick flip #and ur like 'oh. that looks cool but. it's still not food...?'

[vampire-himbos-of-santa-perdita]

...I think I just became a House of Wax apologist...

#i too partake in shitty horror movies from time to time yes #enjoyed it very much #went from 0 to 100 in terms of Sophie's Favourite things real quick #really wish they would've utilized Paris Hilton better #she's always Raring to Do Things in horror movies #and no one ever knew what to do with her except the people doing Repo! #put her in more horror movies #I think she'd get it if people let her #house of wax

[ibrokeeverything]

Y'ALL THEY BROUGHT BACK THE DROPPED ZILLO BEAST PLOTLINE FROM CLONE WARS

#i couldn't belive my eyes! #im so freaking excited!!!! #this show is made for fans and im living for it #also i was really digging the vibes this episode #the horror movie shots and music in particular were immaculate #also the batch being pissed at cid is everything i needed #and the number of time the guys picked up or held omega this episode was amazing #ny heart 😭 #they're such a family #and omega with lula at the end 🤧 #also her reaction to the crew being eaten was so sweet and sad #she's just a kid! #also echo and rex my beloved!!!! i cant wait to see them again! #also im terrified that they're looking for omega 🙃 #oh my god this episode was so good!!! #and im bummed because i know it's getting forshadowed by the mandalorian #which is a whole separate post #dont get me wrong i love the mandalorian but i feel like it was kind of shitty of disney to have them air of the same day #the bad batch is clearly less popular since its animated and a sequel to clone wars therefore having a higher barrier to entry #they could have given it a little courtesy and aired the mandalorian on another day or waited until the bad batch was over #anyway ill get off my soapbox 😅 #the bad batch #star wars #tbb #the clone wars #zillo beast