#sick of being on the internet I am so so careful to be as respectful and careful as I can about topics

[sugurufic]

What are your thoughts on the reader and teen nanami attending an improv comedy show…

Oh this is so interesting! I am not funny, like at all, so please don't judge my terrible jokes T^T as always, its not proofread

Nanami, Haibara and you had a lot of fun planned for the weekend, but Haibara had to return home to his family. His sister had gotten a bad fever and he was worried sick about her.

So you and Nanami still went about the plans, going to the mall for some shopping and to the city center to eat, and then return to your respective dorms. The two of you hadn't hung out much without Haibara, his absence weighing you down. With Haibara it was easy to ignore how Nanami's presence made you feel, but now it was practically impossible, with him walking beside you in the mall, dressed in normie clothes.

"Hey ma'am, hey sir!" an attendant at the mall greeted you cheerfully. "We have a free of cost improv comedy session going on, would you care to join us?"

You have always loved improv comedy, watching videos on the internet, but you've never seen one in person. Besides, how bad could it get? It's not like you were wasting any money this way.

"Nanami, can we go, please?" you plead, batting your eyelashes at the blond man, who doesn't even argue.

"Thank you for joining us!" the attendant yells behind you.

"I really hope that it doesn't turn out to be a waste of time," Nanami says as you sit beside him. The room still has some empty seats, but it's a great news that there are people to see a new comedian.

"I don't think it will be," you say, scooting a little closer to him as the air conditioning sent a shiver under your skin.

The empty seats fill up quickly, and the lights are dimmed, waiting for the comedian to take the stage. You are unfamiliar with the man who comes on the stage, viewing his audience with a smile on his face. "Hey everyone! Thank you for being here. You really are helping me convince my parents that maybe I can pull this comedy thing off," He starts of with a jolly voice. "You know, after I wasted four years of my life on an engineering degree."

You chuckle, having heard something similar from plenty of comedians. the man looks over his audience, eyes flickering to a stop to someone on the other end of the room. "Oh, I have a young crowd with me. I really hope you don't get influenced by me. it's not my fault if your mum slaps you with a slipper for not wanting to go to college."

"How old even are you?" he asks the same person. "That young! Now I will feel guilty about making the jokes I had planned." The man shakes his head. "Anyways, you know I am not entirely upset that i did college. I now have more things to make jokes about. Anyone who did CS and now everyone is suddenly asking them to fix computers?"

A surprising number of people raise their hands, and you chuckle once again. Nanami fixes his bangs beside you, trying to hide his rolling eyes. But you know him too well to know what he's doing.

"My parents forbade from speaking to the opposite gender all throughout school. And now that I'm an engineer by degree, they want me to get married." He sighs. "You are too young to understand this. How many of you have partners?" a good number of people raised their hands. "And how many of parent's know?" most hands went down.

The comedian's eyes fall on the pair of you and he asks Nanami, "Hey, blond guy! Is that pretty lady your girlfriend?"

Your face heats up and you can barely look at Nanami, who has gone pink. "N-No," he manages to say.

"Your face tells me otherwise," the comedian laughs. "For those of you who cannot see, Mr. Blond Guy has turned red. The lady seems flustered too. You two did come together, right? Or did I just embarrass two strangers sitting next to each other."

"We go to the same school," You manage to say, despite your flustered state. "And we're friends."

"Miss, maybe you should ask blond guy. He seems very shy." the comedian chuckles.

"I don't think I'm her type," Nanami mumbles in a small voice, and you give him the biggest side eye you have ever given to anyone.

"Judging by the lady's reaction, I'd say you are wrong, buddy." the man laughs. "See people, please tell your friends I helped set up a relationship. If any of your friends need a wingman, please join me on my next shows."

When you leave the mall, you walk together in silence, not even getting the courage to look at him. But you bite down your fears and say, "What gave you the impression that you aren't my type?" You still don't look at him, but your hands are in front of you, trying to grasp the air. "Because then I'd have to fix that. You are exactly my type."

Oh no, you think. You may have spoken to much. "Please ignore what I just said if you don't like me back."

"I do," Nanami softy says, and you whip you head towards him, seeing a rare smile on his face. His cheeks are still dusted a light shade of pink and he looks so cute you could kiss him. "I never thought you could like me like that."

"OH you blind man," you sigh, intertwining your fingers when his hand reaches for yours. "Let's just do this again later, okay?"

"Okay," Nanami says, the smile not leaving his face.

#nanami kento x reader #nanami x reader #jjk x reader

[lovethatmakingcoffee]

Part 2

Forever

I have seen amazing artists and content creators come and go, and some get taken out by cancellation. Whether it was true or not, I’ve seen the fellow painter and aspiring film maker be chased off respective platforms or generally scared away because of the negative effects of cancellation. They will be canceled over stupid things they did in the past close to a decade ago or over something that isn't true. And honestly, I'm sick of it. I don’t care who you cancellers are, I want to rip you apart with fangs and claws. And I'm sick all of you trolls getting what you want. 

There was one artist I knew who made the most beautiful pieces and one random asshole one day called them out for being a pedo. Were they? No, and how would they even know anyway? But everyone just jumped up and dogpiled her. I tried my hardest to intervene and tell her not to listen to what they had to say, but the damage had been done, they succeeded and chased her off. And I will never forgive them for that. Such a talented person chased off and for what? To stroke someone's ego? Because they were jealous? It doesn’t matter. This terrible rage in my stomach has been building up with every artist running away with the fear of being cancelled and I can’t take it. 

When it first began, the cancellation movement, some foresaw how bad it would be and realized that they didn’t want to face it. For example, my beloved Jenna Marbles. Who knows, maybe she was tired of the whole YouTube scene to begin with, she had been doing it for ten years after all, but she decided to do her own cancellation to free herself from someone bringing it up instead. Maybe she realized how dangerous this was and that she should just leave before it was too late, cause with 2020 and that cancelling movement on the horizon, I don’t think my girl had the strength to keep up. She did her own cancellation suicide and fucked off, escaping criticism by criticizing herself. And I was heartbroken. Still am. That it had gotten so bad that a content creator would freely air out her own dirty laundry to feed the rabid wolves and make her escape. And there were those who relished off of it. Happy she was gone. Making me sick and fueling my anger even more. 

And then there were more. Mostly men, cancelled here and there. I won't name names, but we know them. Know who they are if you followed any cancellation ever. And chased off usually over some stupid shit they said in their twenties or being accused of grooming. Which the former most of the time seems easier to bounce back from then the later. Being called a racist, homophobic, etc., can be subjective. Especially during this day and age when the internet is so unbelievably sensitive to everything because they read every word with malicious intent towards themselves specifically. But so many content creators get targeted at the height of popularity or just because they were extremely popular. It’s obvious. So well known, and the bigger they are, the harder they fall. And some if not many, y'know, don’t deserve it. Some if not many don’t deserve cancellation and I will bite with so much rage in my being on their part. I know they can probably take care of themselves, but there are so many who can’t. They can’t hold on in these seas of accusations.

And then there are those who bounce back. Many will argue that they shouldn’t, but after time many seem to have forgiven what they were canceled about or just simply don’t care. Like Mr. Logan Paul for example. The man had such a lack of sense that he filmed a dead body and posted that on Youtube. And now he is doing interviews for Mr Beast. I just find that one... Interesting? Now, I don’t know much about Logan Paul except for all his drama. I don’t care too much for him cause he’s pretty loud and that hurts my ears. Nor is his content for me. I don’t know much about him as a person at all and can’t speak on behalf of his character. I don't know if Logan Paul grew up or gained some common sense, but what I do know is that he held out. He washed off all the judgment and accusations, drama or whatever and held on. Which seems to be the only cure for cancel culture on the internet. Is to endure.

And I don't want these trolls to feel more empowered than they already do. Cause I hate these trolls and want to cave their teeth in. Or maybe expose them too. Show your face, cowards behind the screen. You accuse those who are wide out in the open of the most terrible things, at least have the balls to say it to their faces instead of hiding in your monitors.

And frankly, when has cancellation ever helped anyone? I find it very useless and it just hurts people. Maybe if it was directed at large corporations or films making ugly versions of sonic, then I could see that as impactful. But no, it usually goes after the individual which is just so stupid. Hounding them about the past and past shit they said. So idiotic, it baffles me that people still allow it. To let the trolls say they have moral superiority over you and what they say goes. Gross. And you just know that these bastards on the other side of the screen have done shit too. They’ve said the wrong thing to the wrong person. Probably worse. Made the nastiest of jokes and comments. And are just being hypocritical and immature. I know I am also not above people and stupid dark jokes and these trolls should quickly learn this too if they know what’s good for them.

And these cancellers certainly have a lot of time on their hands. They might be young. Maybe. Might be a stupid kid which if so I could expand the notion, that if it is a stupid kid, then yeah, they could be forgiven for what they've done one day as I would expect these content creators to be forgiven for the stupid shit they said in their youth one day too. But also, what they did was horrible. I would respect Forever if he actually went about suing someone, but I don’t think he can sue a child. But still, what a horrible child. If only their parents knew. That they are dismantling lives just because they find someone annoying.

But to be for real and realistic, I think this person is some sad boring unemployed troll who resents him for whatever reason and this is their way of retaliation. And with that... Forever get their ass. He is upending your life and attempted to do the same to some of your friends. Get em.

And lastly, if Forever really was a creep, which no he is not, I want to ask Quackity if he did background checks on any of these content creators? Or did he just invite them in which I could see as a major oversight. Because these creators, I feel like when inviting them into something like a Minecraft server, it’s akin to a sponsorship. It supports your project but you have to do a thorough background check to see if they are safe for stream. Which is just why I found that it doesn't make sense at all that at least Quackity wouldn't know about Forever’s past! With how rife and pungent cancel culture is now, if I was him, I'd be so on edge. Especially if it’s my passion project was on the line. And he should know what it's like, even at his young age, he should know from what he's seen. And maybe the QSMP was seen as something small at first so he didn’t make the precautions, but once QSMP was getting bigger, wouldn’t he have checked? He should have been able to as well. Some rando online found these tweets thanks to pure spite, I'm sure Quackity and co could have done some digging sooner, months earlier and have made a decision. So this, this here, makes the least sense to me out of this entire nonsensical situation. 

But hey, if Forever somehow is a freak which I can tell he’s not, then I will eat my words. But that is not today.

(Same with part 1. I will block you if I find you too annoying. My temper is short and my block button is sincerely right there.)

(But I have said what I wanted to say. There is probably more. But Goodbye for now.)

#qsmp #quackity smp #forever #foreverplayerg #qsmpforever #qsmp forever #discourse #I have much to say

[yrrtyrrtwhenihrrthrrt]

Gonna get a little personal for a minute but you know what grinds my fucking gears

Introverts on the Internet.

*note, if you identify with the term introvert but aren't a fucking asshole such as I am about to describe, this isn't about you but rather a larger issue I've observed

Cw: self-harm, substance abuse, mental illness (I'll get there)

I don't know who the fuck decided that a distinction nearly as scientifically baseless as your zodiac sign was such a metric to judge people by but Jesus fucking CHRIST

And you don't see "extroverts" doing this shit. I never once saw a post that was like "Hehe I'm such an extrovert I want to force ALLL my introvert friends out of the house!!! They're so boring and lame and weird" but all the time, ALL THE TIME it's "huehuehue I am an introvert I am morally AND intellectually superior. I hate all my friends and am annoyed when they expect me to show them any care or compassion BUT if they stop including me they are bad friends even though I tell them to fuck off when they invite me places. When strangers say hi to me in public I spit on them. Here's a tiktok I made joking about domestically abusing my roommate for inviting her friends over to our house" like fuck the fuck off???

Ignoring the fact that introvert and extrovert DO NOT MEAN "don't like people" "likes people" (they mean "gets energized from being around/not around people") and ignoring the fact that there's significant debate over whether or not this distinction even actually exists in psychology in the first place and ignoring the fact that many of these "introverts" aren't actually introverts and have undiagnosed mental illness or external circumstances that make social environments stressful (coming from someone mentally ill himself who thought she was an introvert because they had shitty friends and were depressed) can we just like. Leave people the fuck alone and not get mad at other humans for having the audacity to BE FRIENDLY!?!?

And it seeps into EVERYTHING. A depressed person who sits morosely in their room staring at a wall forgetting to eat, reading fucking. Catcher in the Rye over and over and over and cutting themselves is "deep, intellectual, etc." meanwhile a depressed person who goes to clubs because alcohol is the only way they can feel anything and they want so badly to be happy with their friends, blacking out making themselves sick, THAT person is "boring, dumb, not respectable"

How do I know? BECAUSE I WAS BOTH OF THESE DEPRESSED PEOPLE.

NEITHER OF THOSE BEHAVIORS SHOULD BE ENCOURAGED. THEY ARE BOTH SELF HARM. BUT NOBODY SHOULD BE MADE TO FEEL LIKE SHIT ABOUT THEMSELVES FOR HAVING A MENTAL ILLNESS EITHER. FUCK.

If you wouldn't be an asshole to someone for cutting themselves, don't be an asshole to someone for alcohol/drug use. Provide support? Yes! Express concerns, of course! But maybe just think about what you fucking say about strangers when you don't know what's going on in their life.

Context: I saw a post that said "If you need alcohol to have fun you're boring"

If you NEED alcohol to have fun, you are struggling with mental illness and you don't deserve to be called boring for it. Fuck. Rant over.

#People find me endlessly entertaining sober but I haven't felt authentic happiness without being sloshed in six years #anyway just stop being an asshole being an introvert or an extrovert or an ambivert doesn't make you better than anyone else #if you even are those things if they even exist in the first place #introvert #extrovert #ambivert #substance abuse #mental health #depression #cw: self-harm #cw: substance abuse

[ambassadorarlert]

currently laying in bed sick and figured i’d get some things off my chest

being on tumblr and interacting w ppl on here is strange bc 2023 was the roughest year of my entire life, like no joke. irl and online, i’ve been forced to stay quiet, hidden, and endure being burnt from every possible angle. i’ve gotten out of one toxic cycle barely by the skin of my teeth and the second chance of life i was given would be a wasted if i didn’t change the way i live and think.

this blog used to be a safe haven for me, a place where i could share my writing (which is something I wanted to get back into since falling out of it for years.) i had a huge medical accident, and never got treated properly for it because I couldn’t afford to see a doctor (financial abuse woo!! 😀) and was gaslight to believe certain things weren’t as they seemed, so my health was pushed to the back burner and i had to press on for someone who never even loved me. now that i’m away from that situation, i’ve been trying to not put pressure on myself to write and upload. i see writing as a whole an art and the things i want to create cannot be rushed or mass produced, which is what a lot of younger people are used to and why they’re so rude and demanding requests, why they don’t read rules or respect boundaries, why they say out of pocket shit because they’re used to commenting on their fav creator/celebs pics without repercussions. writers aren’t influencers or content creators — we’re people who do what we love for free. no creators programs to pay us and gives us platforms, no sponsorships, some of us don’t even get tips. when i see mutuals leave certain fandom spaces because of hate, it genuinely makes me sad.

on top of abuse irl, i’ve been getting abused on here as well. internet harassment hardly constitutes as “bullying” in the eyes of some but not to me. this is an especially hard topic for me to talk about, and i can hardly be vague about it because it will kick up a bunch more shit. but if want see the change, i have to speak up. if i want to be comfortable, i first have to get used to be uncomfortable. I never said anything until now, because it’s been dragged out long enough. they’re younger than me and are clearly suffering psychological issues. i for real don’t want them to be hurt. but it’s hard to not notice what they’re doing when they’re doing it. they keep tabs on everything i say and people i talk to, make blogs and remake blogs when I block them. i don’t have definite proof of this part in particular, but i suspect they go around and tell stories about me which makes sense as to why mutuals i’ve made will block/unfollow me out of the blue. (anyone can block who they want for whatever reason they want, but the pattern is there and it’s strange.) i’m sure they’ll try to take this post and create an issue, victimize themselves and change the narrative, but I don’t care anymore. i mentioned no names and i said what i said.

i want my blog back. i want to write my silly fics and stories. i want to be able to support people unapologetically and see all the self ships, say what i want to say and post what i want to post and show ppl that love is everything and there’s no place for hate in 2024. i’ve always been outspoken and called bullshit when i smelled it, and have said whatever has come to my mind. so if there’s anything I’ve ever said that may have offended someone in anyway, i actually truly am sorry and will 100% say it to your face if need be. its easy for me to troll real trolls, and stick up for other people who have a hard time defending themselves. i need to learn how to do the same for myself, and relearn how to take care of myself. i feel more comfortable doing that one step at a time.

#totally don’t have to read this btw #im just venting fr #text post #i’ve written this so many times but never uploaded it

[sureuncertainty]

just saw a somewhat valid post complaining about the lack of sincerity in media today, particularly looking at like, reboots and adaptations without respect or love for the source material, and while I completely understand that perspective, it's also maddening to me to watch people say this and agree with it but not seek out/support those pieces of media that ARE made with love and care and sincerity (of which there are literally SO MANY) AND then turn around and call anything that IS sincere and authentic is actually cringey and problematic

LITERALLY people in the notes on that post going like 'everything is so sanitized bc people are worried about being problematic' on the fucking internet these days where literally everything is problematic and you can't like anything bc if you like it you're actually also part of the problem, and you have to have morally pure and correct and upright opinions about media and stories at all times, and if you don't you're a BAD EVIL PERSON

and don't even get me STARTED on the fucking person in the notes of that post who was like 'this is why i only read books bc books are just far superior to all other forms of media' like i am exploding you with my mind, art and storytelling are so valuable and important no matter the medium. there are movies and shows and podcasts and yes, books that are telling meaningful important stories and you just decide you don't care bc it doesn't fit your litmus test of what must be ideologically pure and perfect at all fucking times. you have to enjoy things but you can't enjoy them too much bc that's cringe. the HYPOCRISY of the people in the notes on that post being so cynical about media while complaining about media being too cynical these days

like sorry but i'm sick and tired of this culture. like isn't it exhausting? aren't you fucking tired of hating everything all the time? you spend all of your energy hating everything and then complain that there aren't any sincere stories? there are so many amazing movies and shows that have been coming out this year and every year, we are in a period of time where acknowledging the hard work of writers and actors and other storytellers has become more important than ever with the strikes and such, and you're going to sit up on your soapbox and act like you're better than everyone, preaching about how art is dead bc of capitalism while doing fuck all to actually support the HUGE amount of creators desperately trying to tell the stories we love and care about

also puts me in mind of the other post I saw awhile back making an addition to about how important stories are to us as humans, because of their stupid condescending 'you're too afraid to be alone with your thoughts that you can't have any identity outside of media lol aren't you so pathetic' and everyone in the notes like 'wow you so called me out!' and then when I responded to it op was like 'wow look at this cishet man being fake deep and shit' like the moment I try t express my own sincerity, even online, I am mocked and misgendered lol

like no fucking wonder stories aren't sincere anymore, you call them cringe and you mock them. there are so many beautiful stories out there and you don't even have to look hard to find them

#win rambles #anyway i love being a storyteller and i love stories and i love the things i love and refuse to apologize for them #i refuse to apologize for my love and sincerity #no matter how much people might decide to make fun of me or misconstrue my words

[tamsythepansy]

I'll say it - and this is not vaguing, this is real personal experience - the trans-exclusionist side of Tumblr is a little too close for comfort lately.

I find myself tripping and falling almost daily into a toxic rabbit hole of people who believe and promulgate the most reprehensible things about me and mine, calling us violent men who live to colonize women's spaces, slinging pejoratives parroted from the so-called alt-right, etc, etc, etc - we're all familiar with the tired rhetoric.

I wish you could spend a week living in my mind. Sense the overwhelming alienness that men and masculinity have always exuded for me. Recall the indescribable sensation of operating my pre-transition body as if it were an ill-proportioned marionette. Feel my sick horror at knowing that someone, somewhere (probably a man of the actual variety, tbh) is going to default to treating me as a fetish object. Experience the abject humiliation of being absent-mindedly called "he" for the fifth time today by some church lady, or worse, my own father.

If an afab lesbian doesn't want to fuck me because I have an amab body, I don't particularly care. Please find it in your hearts to stop waving around the hyperbolic pot shots of a few battle-fatigued internet strangers as proof that my friends and I are all chomping at the bit to correctively sexually assault you.

That said, I'm not for a second going to pretend that we're all perfect little darlings. Respectability politics are futile. Probably two of the three biggest emotional beatings of my adult life have been perpetrated upon me by other transfems, but it's with other transfems that I've also experienced forms of joy and ecstasy and solidarity and sisterhood that I didn't know were even possible.

It must unnerve you that we understand femininity, wrenched from the confines of an oppressive and largely fictitious sex binary, as something to be championed and celebrated. We are the leak in the engine room of patriarchy, an uncomfortable reminder that the artificially and violently enforced supremacy of masculinity is not inevitable or inviolable. It is a garrison house built on sand, and we are its defectors, dishonourably discharged and fleeing without cease, the oppressor's rod at our backs and the promise of fairer worlds on high before us.

I may never come to possess a coherent self-understanding of myself as a woman, but - by and large - I am usually assumed to be one, consequently treated as one, and my fate will be the same as yours.

And the choice to meet that eventuality on my feet, hand in hand with all those who are (rightly or not) considered to be women under patriarchy, is a thousand times preferable to living a lie in the imperial palace of assumed manhood.

I am not your enemy.

#trans feminism #trans lesbian #transfem #tamsytalk

[sicktemberfeed]

READ BEFORE INTERACTING

Hello and welcome!

Following the announcement that the official sicktember event runners would only be posting a set number of fills per day, I sought permission to curate a blog of my own where I did my best to offer an alternate option, closer to how the fills were promoted before.

Previously, the mods of the event would reblog/promote every fill that was posted. Many people, it seems, were not a fan of this influx of fills being spilled onto their dash, understandably so. I, however, loved that, and am very sad to see it go.

So! I made this blog for myself and for anyone else who might want a place to peruse every fill. This blog will contain every sicktember fill for 2023 I can get my hands on, and I will be tagging fandoms accordingly and to the best of my ability!

I am not affiliated with the mods of sicktember. I am just a HUGE fan of their event who asked them permission to do this so people could have an alternate option and a wide range of fics to read all in one convenient place. I totally respect and understand their decision, and I am super grateful they were cool with me doing this.

Please direct any and all questions about the event itself to @sicktember! And please read their FAQ to keep yourself up to speed on rules and regulations, as all other rules will apply to this blog, as well.

!!! SEARCH BY PROMPT BELOW !!!

2023 Prompts

Hopelessly Bad at Self-Care

Quest for a Cure

“What happened to your phenomenal immune system, huh?”

Hiding an Illness

Preventative Measures (Not Taken)

Sick and Injured

 “You’re a Jerk When You’re Sick”

Persistent Fever

White Coat Syndrome

“The only place we’re going is to the pharmacy.”

Beginner’s Guide to Faking Sick

Old Wives Tale

Anxious Stomach

 ‘‘I shouldn’t be worried about you, but for some reason I am.’’

Sick in an Inconvenient Place

Consulting the Internet/Web MD

Magical Remedy/Healing Potion

“Wear Your Coat, You’ll Catch a Cold.”

Curled Up With a Pet

Cramping Pain

“But if you stay, you’ll get sick too.”

Terms of Endearment/Nicknames

Coughing Fit

“Did you just sneeze?”

Confused/Disoriented

Pink Eye/Conjunctivitis

Uncooperative Patient

“I should have stayed home.”

Side Effects/Adverse Reaction

Patient 0

2023 Alternate Prompts

Alt. 1.“I Could Really Use a Hug Right About Now”

Alt. 2. Fuzzy Socks

Alt. 3. Pounding Headache

Alt. 4. Forehead Kisses

Alt. 5. “I’m so sorry”

#sicktember #sicktember 2023 #pinned

[miraclewoozi]

i originally had about fifteen extra tags on what i reblogged just a while ago but i didn't want to bring too much negativity on that person's post, so.

i am an adult, writing exclusively for other adults here, and anyone under the age of eighteen will NEVER have my consent to read, nor interact with, my NSFW or suggestive pieces of fiction.

when we have 'MINORS DNI' instructions on our pages, in our bios, our pinned posts, in our rules, on every single NSFW fic we write and you still go out of your way to interact with things we've posted, you're giving us such a massive middle finger. it tells us that you don't give a damn about us as people, our comfort, our boundaries. how you don't have a shred of respect for us. and that's not okay.

we do not CARE how mature you think you are. we do not CARE what you already know, what you have already read, or watched, or engaged with. you are actively searching out our content, despite being told not to have anything to do with us. we are grown-ups, writing and existing in spaces we curate for ourselves and OTHER grown-ups, only.

we aren't saying this for the fun of it, or because we don't like you, or because we think it's funny to exclude young people from fandom spaces. we are not just protecting you, as children. because by law, you are children. we are not just protecting ourselves, as adults who never WANTED or intended for you to read our work.

we are setting strict boundaries, because as i've said once and will say a hundred times until you get the point, ANYTHING -- online or offline -- TO DO WITH SEX REQUIRES CONSENT, and you do not have the consent of adult writers to engage with their nsfw content. i do not care. you, at 14/15/16/17 years old, understand what consent is and how it works. if you don't, you most certainly have no business searching for this sort of stuff on the internet.

leave 18+ spaces alone. they are not for you. we are sick to our back teeth of needing to keep repeating these sentiments over and over again. if you follow me and are a minor pretending not to be one, remove yourself from my blog, and do not interact with me.

#j talks. #psa. #this got a little rambly and i don't know if it makes a whole lot of sense but tldr: MINORS. GET OFF MY BLOG. #might delete this in a few hours when i've calmed down but i've got such the ache over this that i'm considering a writing hiatus sooo #who knows! #in the meantime. gonna have another therapeutic little follower clear out :) #and if i've soft blocked you before && you've refollowed me without putting your age on your blog. ur on the chopping block too <3

[mikoriin]

Hello Mikoriin! I saw your request for experiences of wearing the hijab for your character and I thought I'd chip in with my pov! (hopefully this helps!)

As a background, I'm a 31 year old muslim malay in Malaysia. I grew up with a pretty balanced muslim family of 7 children (i'm the second eldest). My parents are both from lower income families who got overseas education (scholarship) in the States back in the 80s. So while they're very strict with basic rules where the religion is concerned, they're pretty balanced and liberal in letting us decide what we want to do with what we're taught about the religion. (i.e they told us to wear the hijab when we were kids but they did say if we don't want to anymore when we're older, we're free to not wear it [though it'll make them sad]. They explicitly mention this as a sign of respect that we're adults who can decide what we want with our life at a certain point) .This is not quite the norm as far as I heard, so I think that has influenced me quite a bit in how I adapt to many aspects of Islam, including how I see wearing the hijab.

To summarise it, the hijab to be is a veil of protection. Ofc the texts tells us this is what is to be expected of us women, but I was also told that it is to give us the power of deciding who we want to reveal our crowning feature (or in some texts, it's actually described as the 'crown'), mainly it refers to our hair (as far as I'm told. I'm not an expert but it seems to be the case). To me at least, as someone who is very reserved and careful with others, I appreciate being able to feel like revealing this (a part of myself) is within my control at least. But I'm a pretty private person in general, so I think this works out the best for me too. And having something to be considered sacred really grounds me, personally. I've been told this is pretty old-fashioned but I like it at least T-T I feel very empowered wearing a hijab.

Between you and me, I've tried walking out without it and it just didn't feel right. I didn't appreciate the way people looked at me and their insistence that "you're better this way". I felt very... invaded in a way? If that makes sense? I ended up putting on my hijab again after and never took it off since (only when I'm really nauseous, sick or i'm in some kind of physical ailment and I need some air).

I also personally appreciate that as someone who is of a very mixed heritage and as someone who doesn't really feel like I belong in any category through my life, that I am recognised as being muslim from a single look. Even though these days it makes me a bit of a target when I travel to western countries and that can be scary, it makes me feel like I belong somewhere. Like I have some identity that I feel at home with.

Also, I realise that growing up wearing the hijab has really taught me what is considered beauty and I learned early on about what the public perpetuates as a standard of beauty isn't all there is to me at a very young age (way before the internet was talking about it). There's some sort of switch that turns on when you have to dress yourself with limitations. There's something weird about it that kind of makes you dig deeper because I can't dress like most of my friends do so I guess that makes me search for my individualism in an organic way. What I've learned has balanced me a lot and I really, genuinely enjoy wearing it. Not to mention the kind of things you can do creatively with a hijab is endless! And at most if I mess up, I'll be damaging fabric i can recycle into something else rather than my hair TvT haha. this works well for me who's not very good at handling delicate things like hair.

Also a plus is that you never have to worry about bad hair day lmao. I love being able to rush for my university classes way back when and just stuff my hair into my hijab instead of having to put products and protect it from the sun so this also appeals to lazy little me lmao.

So basically!! It makes me feel safe, makes me feel beautiful. It's convenient, it gives me a sense of identity. A sense of belonging. And it's my ultimate lady's tool to always look as clean and sharp as possible! haha. I hope this helps! Sorry for the long ramble :,))) I'm so excited to hear you're writing a hijabi character! Makes me so happy!

wow thank you SO MUCH for your input!! i think i want to incorporate some of these thoughts into heather's character if thats okay! i already have her wearing hijab because thats 1) how she was raised by her parents, 2) because she feels beautiful and confident in it and without it she feels naked. i personally have always thought hijabs were so beautiful and muslim women were so graceful and ethereal with their headdresses, and i kind of want to give heather a bit of that from growing up seeing her mom look beautiful in hijab. i havent designed heather's mom but i want her to be gorgeous for sure haha

i also did originally have heather's parents be kind of strict with their religion, but i think i might change it to where theyre still very devout, however theyre more lenient with it comes to how their children interpret their religion and what it means to them. heather is an only child right now, but maybe ill give her a sibling or two as i develop her and her family more! (definitely thinking i want elise to have younger siblings instead of being an only child)

but yeah thank you so much for this beautiful message and for sharing your thoughts with me it was really insightful!!

#ocs #affinity #heather

[firinniee]

HOGWARTS LEGACY VS JKR

Out of context but I decided to celebrate the release of the latest Harry Potter game (10.02) and I have to say here my opinion on this subject, someone who grew up on HP, is part of the LGBT and does not wholeheartedly support person who created this magical world. No matter what you think, if you have any respect for another human being, please read what I have to say, k?

The fact that I wanted to write such an entry appeared in my head from the moment I started getting insults and threats here because I supposedly "support jkr"... because I like Harry and I drew pictures with him over a year ago quite regularly? This is stupid. Just like raiding people because they like something is stupid. Since apparently we have a problem with separating author from they work and attack for everyone who has anything to do with Harry Potter has begun. Apart from the fact that books can be bought used and fan merch exists, we can not support the author financially in any way, do you think it changes anything? Like for Christmas, me and my fiancé got HP bedding and HP pajamas from my mama, and do you think that JK came to Poland to thank my ma' for this purchase? You think that made her have enough money to feed her children and pay for the apartment? NO. Do you think she cares? Of course not! Rowling is a person who could allocate a significant part of her wealth (because yes, we must not forget about it if we want to be objective) for charity, probably even her three children will not be able to spend the money she has because there is too much of it.

But here we come to someone who is not so rich and does not have that much money. Do you know who? The creators of the game. The creators of the game, who not only make a living from being part of creating it, they devoted long hours to it and delved into the world that they must love so that the society that has been waiting for a good game from this university for years will get it. And now you can scream "But why did they go to make a transphobe game?!?!?!?" Let me explain, the first transphobic JK Rowlings games on Twitter appeared in 2020, and the first mentions of the already quite developed Hogwarts Legacy we met in 2018. It is true that the creators cleverly wanted to cut themselves off from JKR, but unfortunately even they were intolerant of "anti jkr", and yes really anti their time, anti their work and anti their work as artists.

And you think that even if, hypothetically, none of the games were bought, would the author of HP cry about it? No, we would show her that even if the next games, books and movies fail, she will still be in a high position as an author.

Now in private, I hope you're not a hypocrite and if you think that just liking HP is supporting JKR, are you doing anything for others to be what they want to be? Have you helped a trans person and bought them a binder? Do you publicly defend their right to use the restroom where they feel comfortable or did you do something JUST FOR GOOD of that person? Or let's go even deeper, since everyone should be equal, have you helped other people in need? Have you donated blood? Are you in the bone marrow donor database? Have you supported any foundation that supports what is most important to you? Poor ones? Womans? Kids? Animals? Or maybe you just sit on the Internet, use emotional blackmail and hide behind the alleged tolerance, but only in terms of what should be right for you & you want to force others to your will? Ordinary people like me and you suffer because of this behavior. If you want to destroy the right of many people to create their own creations and probably millions of people's right to take a break from the gray world and play a game about a magical kid running around the castle - you are as bad as the jkr you hate so much. Just intolerant.

Nah due to the fact that I am quite sick I don't have the strength to argue in the comments but I think such things should be said out loud, from someone who is at the center of it all. I'll probably be a poser, but I'd rather buy a switch game once it's available, but for now, I wish everyone could feel comfortable - whether it's in such big things as orientation, pronouns or being yourself, but also in such mundane things as liking Harry Potter. If it makes you happy and doesn't hurt anyone, remember that you don't have to be like the author if you don't support them. Good day my beans! ~Firinnie

#hogwarts #harry potter #hogwarts legacy #anti jkr #anti j k rowling #firinnie #firinniee

[asheanon]

Ahaha so, uh... 🥴 I didn't share this thing here, but I'm going to answer some questions from it here because, once again, I hate fighting with text limitations from another side of the internet!

I am tagging you for this, though, @vinjaryou, so you get the notification and whatnot. I hope you don't mind. 🙏

From: Ship Ask Game - The Basics

Here we go with more ship posting... 🤠 (Meaning I'm sorry to everyone except the MVPs who don't mind. Hahaha!)

🌌🌹💜

5. Do they argue often? If so, what do they argue about?

Not really. Or so I think, anyway. 🤔 They could be more prone to arguments if Sal wasn't so non-confrontational. She also values information over ego, so it's less of an argument and more of a deliberation if she ever gets involved in something. The less proper communication-friendly it is, the more likely it is to be dropped. It's not worth wasting her breath over!

Kuja is similar in the sense that some arguments just aren't worth his time as well, though. He's "too good" for that. Something really has to feel like it's on the line for it to be worth arguing over, otherwise, he'll just let whatever "idiot" is trying to argue with him "die mad." It's not quite like Sal's approach of leaving them be with whatever beliefs they may have; he likes to make a much firmer point of insulting them because he really is all the ego Sal lacks. Sal = information. Kuja = ego. Haha!

There are less serious matters where they both can be open to a more facetious argument, though. They're both just playful enough to get a kick out of being contrary with one another over some of the little things out there! It's with silly little things, such as fashion sense, puzzles, food, etc.

14. Do they enjoy PDA, or are they more private with affection?

More private, 110%. They had private beginnings that were kept as much of a secret as possible from the others for various reasons, plus, Sal is definitely not a PDA type. Even when things are more comfortable/less secretive between everyone, she's very... uncertain of it.

I've described Sal as being very control-oriented out of fear for a great majority of things. "Fire, which fears its own heat. Despite how beautifully it burns" as Kuja himself more eloquently worded it! And that very much applies here too. There's something she's scared of and that uncertainty puts a damper on something like PDA.

As for Kuja, he has some sense of decorum; meaning he doesn't mind maintaining some privacy, though, there are times later on where he would like showing off a little more. He is very vain, after all; to have a lady like Sal to feed into that vanity (and be a little possessive with, I won't lie) appeals to him too.

That being said, however, I will say that it's actually a sign of growth to see Sal become more confident and open to it over time. 🤍

18. How do they care for each other when one of them is wounded/sick?

They both do the best they can, despite having their individual shortcomings. 💕

For Sal, the more proper medical know-how that she's picked up from years of what is most easily summarized as "lab work" comes into play here. She'll care for Kuja much like a nurse or a doctor. While it has its softness, it also has this respectful distance to it. She isn't the type to cuddle and dote on someone in this situation. I'll bring it up over and over: she's warm, but distant. Just like a star. And that aforementioned "fear" has a lot to do with that too.

As for Kuja, he has some knowledge of his own (it's basically "magic vs. science," if you will. Technically just two different types of medical science, really!) but he's definitely more of the doter/lover when it comes to a problem. If he's emotionally invested, that is! I'd actually say he's had a lot of moments where he's just clueless as to what to do in these situations.

Though both of them are more prone to keeping problems such as these hidden from one another, Kuja opens up to Sal way more easily than she does to him later down the road. Sal is the epitome of being closed off and prone to hiding any form of suffering she has from anyone. It's very rare that she allows that sort of weakness to be seen, if she can help it.

Once again, I'll bring up character development, though: those walls of theirs do gradually start to fall with time. There is a period where both of them aren't entirely sure of themselves and their actions at times like these, but they eventually start meeting face to face in all those layers of vulnerability. It's very endearing. 💙

33. How do they flirt? Who’s the worse flirt?

You have more of your classically romantic flirt with Kuja while Sal is simply sincere, but unintentionally mystique all in the same.

It's needless to be said, but as a professional flirt by default, Kuja is definitely the better flirt. It's a regular part of his character even outside of whatever is going on between him and Sal, haha! He flirts with intention and it's very clear that he's doing it (and he's very successful with it, more often than not.) To make it more sensual is effortless for him just as well.

By comparison, Sal is the worse flirt, hands down. Again, she's merely genuine with an air of mystery; when she decides to throw in a playful remark or gesture on occasion, some may interpret it as flirtatious, however, despite it not being her intention. She'll often take on a more analytical demeanor to help subdue amorous undertones in most social situations, but... man, when she chooses to drop those walls of hers and that sincerity intertwines with the more intimate, it's really something to behold in its own right (at least, in my own incredibly biased opinion! Haha!) She'll never leave you feeling like her love is fake. Let's just put it that way. 🌌

#that’s a good question ❔ #🌌🌹💜 #Kuja 🪶🌹 #Sal 🌌🎹 #filling the void 🌌 #with #oc x canon #shenanigans #I am so sorry #I need to come up with a tag for shippy stuff #so you guys have something to blacklist #if needed #but thank you for the questions! #vinjaryou #🥴💕

[theivorybilledwoodpecker]

Anti-government protests in Iran have entered an eighth week, despite a crackdown by security forces in which local human rights activists say at least 321 people have been killed and 14,800 others have been detained. One female protester in her 20s, who spent a week in prison and was recently released on bail, told the BBC's Khosro Kalbasi Isfahani that she witnessed physical and psychological torture, and other ill-treatment. This article contains details some readers may find distressing. "I have been released from jail, but I feel like I am still shackled. I had heard stories about people being arrested and tortured, but it is different when you see such things first-hand. I feel that I am going to explode with rage, since I can't do anything for those still stuck in jail. I just want to get this testimony out there. There were girls as young as 15 among the people detained with us. Two young women suffered from chronic illnesses, but our jailers refused to give them medicine. One of them panicked and fainted when she was handed a heavy prison sentence. But the security officers did not care. We asked them to call an ambulance, but a female officer said she would "be alright soon enough". The same women was tortured while being interrogated. They smashed her hands so severely that almost all her fingernails were broken. When another woman had a seizure, the guards just shrugged it off, saying that if she died it would mean "one piece of trash less on earth". She suffered from epilepsy, but the guards refused her access to medication. A fourth woman had cancer. But the security officers refused her access to medical care. She had letters from respected doctors saying that she needed to visit medical centres for routine procedures, but they refused her medical care. A 17-year-old girl said her main concern was that she would not be able to get good marks in her final school exams, because she could not study in prison. She told us that she hoped her mother had told her school principals that she was sick, so they would let her go back to school after getting released. A young man in his 20s, who was arrested at the same time as us, was beaten so badly by security forces. They hit him on his head with batons. He feared that he would die there and then. He gave us his name and his parents' address so that we would be able to tell them about his last moments. I don't know where they took him. They also brought young men into the cell next to ours and beat them. We could hear the sound of the beatings and their screams. We panicked when we heard those sounds. Another terrifying thing about being arrested during the protests was that no clear procedures were followed. You did not know what might happen to you, hour to hour. Everything depended on the whims of the officer handling your case. And they constantly lied to you. You were kept in state of limbo. Many protesters also cannot afford the hefty bails that the judges are demanding, meaning that they are stuck in jail. Since my release, I have felt that my hands are tied. They have installed so many surveillance cameras across my city that I feel that anywhere I go they are constantly watching me. Many people have stopped taking their mobile phones to protests because that will expose them to additional risks if they get arrested. Some protesters used to take old "dumbphones" [basic handsets without the internet or apps] with them. But security forces have become wary of that and now accuse them of being "riot leaders". In some cases, they have released people from detention centres and later raided their homes and seized all their electronic devices. I hope that nobody else will be forced to suffer even a shred of what we saw and endured. I was beaten at the time of my arrest. But your own personal pain becomes irrelevant when you see the pain of others. I can say with confidence that almost no-one cried over their own injuries - it was only over the pain of others or out of fear for their families."

#Iran #Signal boost #Boost the signal

[corruptedsilence]

Anonymous asked: You're endorsing a harassment campaign that's actively doxxed someone's address and sent them to the hospital for suicide attempt. You deserve to burn in Hell.

So here let me tell you something about doxxing:

The person in question that is being claimed to have been “doxxed” put their own name on their go fund me page, which is public to my knowledge.

Stating your last name is not doxxing. I haven’t seen any information about an address, state, country, or continent of where this person lives being shown or addressed in any of the screenshots and evidence I’ve seen.

If you do have evidence of Doxxing, send it to me. You don’t have to give me the address, you can censor that out, but I haven’t seen any screenshot giving an address or information of any location of any kind being shown.

The fact this person in question gave out their own last name on their go fund me means it’s not doxxing. It’s public information because they shared it. No one shared private information that wasn’t already able to be found and seen.

You cannot public your own information on the internet, of your own free will, and then claim people pointing to that public information as “doxxing” because it’s not. It was also not spread to my knowledge with malicious intent. I understand the issues with deadnaming, people are not referring (to my knowledge) as them *currently* as that name. The yare saying they “were” this or “this is who they were” in past tense. While I understand deadnaming is not okay, and if you change your name the current name should be respected; if people have a bad experience with someone, if you are showing the same bad behaviors, there is nothing wrong with informing people they might have hurt that this is the same person. Especially if they have not changed.

It is deceitful to not be honest about that, especially if you try to worm your way back into a community as a new alias and continue the same toxic and bad behavior. Whether you change your name or not, you cannot outrun the bad and toxic behavior you’ve shown and sadly a lot of that might be associated with your deadname, people still deserve to know as to not get hurt by you further. Being trans, changing your name, doesn’t erase the harm you did to others or continue to perpetuate.

I want people to get better. I want people to change but if you are kirby, or one of their friends, by telling them “yes roleplay child porn will help you” is not helpful. It does not help. I was molested and abused as a child and RPing this stuff out does not help you get better. I am urging them to get better, doubling down while it might seem like the thing to do because it’s hard to break off relations with people who give you that attention and validation, will not help in the long run. Please, for your health, for everyone’s help, help yourself and break out of that environment. Break out of those people who are sick and are trying to keep you in a state that you will never be able to move on for their own gratification.

You can get better.  You can make friends again that will care about you for more than just RPing child porn. But you have to make the first step, and pushing back won’t help and will only hurt you and your chances to get closure and move on. I want to believe you can, because I was able to break out of it, but it’s really down to you.

You will stay in this cycle of abuse, suicidality, and depression because you’re stuck in a cycle, you have to break out of it and I know you can. But if you’re going to send anon hate, blame other people for suicidal behavior, and manipulate others blame because it is difficult to acknowledge and accept bad behavior. We’re accepted by people who use us and hurt us more, but you can break out of it and in the long term I can guarantee it will help you even if it might hurt a lot right now to do it.

And if this is one of those people still convincing Kirby or whoever that this stuff is okay? You’re vile. You’re disgusting for keeping a victim in this state for your own god-damned perverted wants and desires. Get the fuck out and stop trying to convince victims that they need to relive trauma to “cope”. 

#Out for a Bite // OOC #Screams from the Abyss // MT #Anon Hate #Opo Don't Look

[jerek]

alright. bonus lore time. i literally never thought anyone was cringe if i ever had a problem w u it was ALWAYS about wrathion.

since fall 2021 ive developed a new talent which is my cortisol randomly spiking and making my stomach too acidic which can and has made me vomit 10 times in a day and put me in ER-level pain and i think it has something to do with the lil polycule of rpers i was with back then.

roster was, iirc (at the time)

26 y/o male / nb

38 y/o female

mid 20s male

mid 20s nb

early 20s female

19 y/o me

18 year old nb

26 year old was the one who made the discord, roleplayed anduin, the rest of us were literally self shippers with ocs. (except me i played sylvanas)

was a SHIT ton of wranduin in there!!! i'm not evil though so i put up with it. i asked once can they please stop putting wrathion porn in there, they were like "thats cool bro i respect your triggers" and put it in a different channel still accessible for the girlies who love to trigger themselves.

so like. heres where the mysterious food poisoning came in. when i say 'dissociative' i may not mean DID as diagnosed by a trained professional after 15-20 tests but like. i couldnt even express to a therapist how shit i felt bc i was not consistently the same type of person between appointments. if you make me come in every week, next week i will not remember why i felt the way i felt last week. i'll vaguely remember what i said, but she's not me anymore lol.

and sometimes it's THAT, the true saint norman experience, sometimes it's possession (thinking other people's thoughts) and sometimes it's dreaming but girl SOMETIMES it manifests as like.

Imagine going up to norman bates and telling him he cares too much about his sick, declining, codependent mom.

Me but when you smack Wrathion I feel it. He's a metaphor for me. I think in his voice. I damn near pray to him ig, being a mormon I can tell you he is the only reason ive ever felt 'the spirit.'

Cringe? Yes!!!!! Out of my control? Yeah 😭

There is no center to my being. i dont identify as anything. i'm not the name my parents gave me, but i am the characters i use to puppet out whatever emotions. Internet sexting for so long has eaten away at my boundaries so much there is no longer any reason for her (who i was born as) to exist or for me to relate to her.

Rping in that group gave me so much dopamine I couldn't sleep, consistently had the feeling that my stomach muscles were splitting down the center, migraines. Literal food poisoning symptoms. It was really fun still!!!!!

And then when the wrathion shit happened like. Whispers of nzoth in the back of my brain started tickling my self defense instincts for no reason. No reason bc I had put up with literally everything including the wrathion shit, the only difference was I personally didn't enjoy wrathion porn.

I knew I was irrational. Not liking a certain type of porn is one thing, I was fighting off the old gods trying not to start some shit.

Prob shoulda communicated! Communicating last time gave me a trigger myself button though. Literally the [triggered] meme.

Eventually you get the feeling that shit is going down the drain whether you like it or not. The rp's stopped, everyone's switched to FF and your laptop can't run it. It's all just kinks, someone posting once or twice a day with "imagine li-li stormstout [redacted]" getting reacted with 😏 emojis.

So I posted screenshots bc I knew the other half of the world, the one with everyone else in it, would feel as alienated as I did. I'm back in 2015 as a 13 y/o dominatrix prude and I want the feeling of 'we know what's wrong' I got from the ER. Literally went to sleep 5 minutes later because I knew I'd be guillotined.

I wake up and I have no idea why I did that. It's been years since I tore off the chunk of me that will do literally anything to be included, those two halves don't communicate anymore.

But shit's fucked now!!

It was always about wrathion. Literally always about my shitass fixation on blizzard's favorite 7 year old to unbutton the shirt on. Girl why

#wrathion

[kierancampire]

There's one thing that confuses me about modern society, and another that i am so sick of.

I never share this view as it sadly is a controversial view nowadays and one that people will react strongly to/mock me for, but that for me will only prove both my views. I hate how society is with the police. So we have said that we should not judge the actions of an individual as the actions of the many, that everyone deserves respect and equal rights, that harming people is bad, violence is bad, that people aren't their careers, it is wrong to kill, it it wrong to get joy out of people killing others, it is wrong to celebrate peoples deaths (unless they were incredibly bad people), and that we just need to care for one another as people. Yet the moment the police are mentioned, all cops are bad, all cops deserve to die, people laugh when they get killed, people encourage violence towards them, it doesn't matter who they are or what they've done, they are a bad person and deserve no remorse. Literally everything society says and i feel what we are all fighting for, suddenly it's the complete opposite when it comes to the police, but that's okay and correct? I don't get it? I find it upsetting, hypocritical, and backwards. And this isn't to say police aren't bad, power hungry, have complexes, and haven't done bad things. But there are minorities who are like that, so why does on matter and the other doesn't?

I also am just SOOOOO fucking sick of extreme reactions and violence. Wanna know what happens literally any time i share anything online lately? I have literally at least one, but usually multiple people, who are complete dicks for no reason. This includes sharing my art, photos of otters, my night terrors, dealing with QAnon people, photos of Roxy, asking people if they are a morning or night person, sharing that i took a walk, sharing that i was groomed, venting about being unable to sleep, sharing photos of my plants, sharing that i was stalked, sharing a photo of my eye, and asking people what made them happy last year. I could go on, but these are all things recently that i have shared online, and i have had at least one, but usually multiple people insult me over, get nasty, mock me, and just react so strongly and negatively for absolutely no reason? And people say "Welcome to the internet!" but it is because i have spent so much time on here that i am sick of it. And i swear it has gotten worse!

But even other things, like corporations at Pride. Do you know what? Personally i would rather corporations shell out for my money and potentially pretend to be an ally, pissing off their homophobic customers and slowly normalising the LGBT+ community, than be hated and assaulted for being gay. Which i have been. Multiple times. Yet people react as if corporations celebrating Pride is as bad as that assault! And that's the thing, this isn't political as any and all sides do it! I am just so incredibly sick of people just always being so hateful and negative and constantly having such violent and strong reactions to things just cause! Like, this random asshole this morning literally admitted he was randomly a dick to me just cause he felt like it, that was it. Why!?! And i deal with this daily! Often multiple times daily! But it is in real life too, people are becoming the same in person! A few times now i have literally put my phone on silent and only checked it when i wanted to, as i am at my limit of this unrelenting stream of bullshit that hits me daily.

I dunno what the fuck society needs, but god i hope we reach a point where we stop all this nasty bullshit, people are forgetting how to be people, people are forgetting respect, decency and care. People just act like entitled children having a temper tantrum. This is why i love a silent woods.

#personal #Vent #Venting #Rant #Ranting #Police #LGBT+ #Pride #Society #Modern society #My views #Personal views

[flippinwhippen]

She was my nightmare incarnate, a self-righteous shithead who didn’t care about my intentions, didn’t care about my feelings – only saw herself with her fucking victim complex. Every time I come close to forgiving her, even say that maybe I will, all I have to do is think. Because regardless of how forgiving I am, there are some things that even I cannot overlook.

Drew my characters in ways that upset me

Asked nonstop questions about world building details that didn’t matter to me, and often times only related to her own character she’d built to put in my world

Actively argued with me about my own world/character motivations – argued with me about my own creative works

Sulked when I wasn’t responding – didn’t ask me what was wrong privately, but instead ghosted me in an effort to punish me

Acted like I owed her something

Actively provoked me when I was unmedicated, even when my spouse said it would be a bad idea

Turned hostile quickly, tried to pin the entire situation on me – taking no blame for any of her actions.

Tried to diagnose me as a monster, tried to make me feel like a monster

Continued to post about my characters, even after we’d had are blow up. Posted about them in a way that all but indicated that they were hers, underlining even more that she never respected me as a content creator.

Continuously shit talked me online, tagging my username in posts repeatedly

Actively played a role in the destruction of my relationship, continues to play a role in the destruction of my relationship.

Nearly caused me to kill myself by throwing myself out a window

Did cause me to self-harm repeatedly, which is probably good cause every time my forgiving nature pops all I have to do is look down

Posted a fucking google file of shit directly onto my page – harassing my users to the point that I had to turn on moderated comments.

The funniest part of all of this, is she accuses me of being a narcissist. This bitch needs a fucking mirror.

I left her alone, I did, I was the bigger fucking person for months while she attacked me and attacked me – and I was told I had to be okay with it. Because she’s my partners best friend, because my partner has never had a friend like her.

Maybe she can keep her damn friend and leave me, maybe I’d prefer that.

Maybe I’m sick and tired of trying to not stir the shit pot because of how it might blow up. I hear excuse after excuse for her. Poor thing, she’s unmedicated, she doesn’t mean it, she’s just trying to understand herself. I’m not here for goddamn target practice, I’m not here to be her damn victim.

And I’m told that she’s allowed to vent her feelings on private blogs. No one even looks at her tumblr, why would you care that she’s saying horrible things and tagging you? But you, you can’t retaliate ever. You have to be nice even if she hurts you.

You have to behave yourself, even while she screams. Don’t get angry, you’ll scare people – don’t get upset, you’ll hurt people’s feelings.

It’s well past the point of course, that any of this matters – as far as I’m aware. I have no idea what the fucker does in her spare time, I try not to think about her. But then I’ll remember, and I’ll remember everything that was said and done and I’ll be so, so angry again.

I’ve never been in a situation like this before, never thought I would be. I’m so careful about who I’m friends with, about who I bare those bits of my soul to. But I gave her bits of me I can’t get back now, and some days it still just makes me want to quit.

To throw all that creative energy in the garbage, just to rid myself of her.

There’s no real ending to this, just a rant, thrown on the internet to clear my head. If she gets to rant on tumblr, then so do I. Will she go back to doing what she was doing, who knows. I don’t even know if she ever stopped, I know better than to look.

Take my words abyss, and give me nothing in return – I have no intention of ever looking at any of it anyways. If you find it, if you read it, then that’s your own damn fault isn’t it?