"doing drugs is just a war with bored but they're sure to get me lord forgive me" - Ab Soul
There's an internal battle when searching for the right way to cope with things. I've lost friends to substances, I've watched friends grow past the overuse and live healthy lives. I myself went from being against anything mind or body altering, to understanding the relationship through personal experience.
On the ladder down the stairway to heaven we find ourselves in purgatory. Finding that boredom is just another way to say stasis, in want or neutrality. Purpose is found through many mediums. Where do you go? Wading through a light so bright you could almost taste the dark. Too much of anything is a terrible thing. Falling inwards it becomes imperative to know your balance. Listen to your gut and if all else feels lost separate from it.
My last year has been both painful and lovely in extremes. I've lost, gained, loved and learned.