#surprise bitches i'm back

[spacedace]

Sat down to write more Ghosts of Gotham adn Business of Family.

Have instead written an opening bit of an AU where Tim accidentally summoned a slightly eldritch Mirrorborn (clone) Queen/Ancient of the Ever Onward (Speedforce) Elle with his whole "try to clone my two dead best friends hundreds of times" thing.

...it's slowly morphing into Tim accidentally/on purpose becoming a warlock with Elle as his equal parts delighted and confused Patron to get his loved ones back. He might unintentionally start a cult (it might be intentional I don't know how unhinged this is gonna get)

Send help, I've started world building again 😭

(Also as always take this mess as a writing prompt if any of my nonsense sounds neat to you ❤️)

#dc x dp #dp x dc #dpxdc #dc x dp prompt #tim drake #dani phantom #elle phantom #danielle phantom #eldritch dani #god queen of clones elle #ancient of the speedforce elle #clone club #warlock tim drake #patron dani #think i'm gonna post the bit i have here in a sec #everytime i think i'm out of new AUs #a new one pops up with a Surprise Bitch moment 😂 #everyone thought Tim was unhinged during the Worst Year of His Life BEFORE #now he has an eldritch suger mama backing him up with his nonsense #jokes on him though he is NEVER gonna get rid of Elle #he's way too interesting #plus she smells match making opportunities with these friends she's helping bring back to life #she's gonna have him marry into the family to keep him #Bart and Kon are going to be So Confused

[thereisabearonmyceiling]

mods are asleep post silver wolf minecraft speedrun

#back at it again with the hsr fanart i'm as surprised as anyone #this bitch lives in my head rent free it's not even funny #honkai star rail #hsr silver wolf #(yes i did reuse the same caption for this twice blops look away) #lumi's swag art #anyway the target audience of this drawing is like 6 people and most of them have already seen it but that's ok i do art for me <3

[ineffably-human]

Guillermo accidentally kills the Baron, which brings the others to trial in front of the Council, where Nandor takes the blame for it out of affection for Guillermo. He kills another vampire and then, with Colin, helps the others escape - inciting the wrath of the Council. The Council sends assassins, which he defeats, further igniting his slayer heritage and leading to the Theatre des Vampires bloodbath.

This results in Nadja and Nandor's appointment to the Council, which leads to Guillermo's appointment as bodyguard, and is also one of the things that incites Nandor's depression. Because he now has access to the Council library, Laszlo is able to find the information about Colin's death, and forms a friendship with him. While acting as a pseudo-Council member, Guillermo saves Derek, who was only turned into a vampire to begin with because he was left behind at that vampire family's home.

Because of Nadja's screwup while on the Council, the Council they're on because of Guillermo, the Sire gets free. Guillermo leads the hunt for the Sire, sparking the revelation that the Sire is intelligent and the Baron is alive and speaks his language - which allows them to make a family together.

Nandor's depression, partly incited by the stresses of the Council, leads to his desire to travel the world. Guillermo nearly goes with him, but is forced to accompany Nadja to a promotion in England that happened because the SVC was impressed with her Council work. Laszlo's new closeness with Colin, incited by what he found in the Council library, led to him finding the baby version of Colin after his death and parenting him for a year.

Nadja's frustrations with Council work lead to her starting the nightclub. The Guide's attraction to Guillermo becomes the key to unlocking her memories. Colin receives actual care from Guillermo that allows him to grow from a toddler to a child. Guillermo's encouragement of his interests leads to Laszlo second-guessing his desire to dismiss them, and Colin's performances are what allow the nightclub to thrive. Guillermo taking money from the club and being able to show monetary success is part of what leads to him inviting his family over for dinner, which leads to his coming out (belated eta and possibly the activation of his family's slayer powers?).

Nandor decides to get married out of loneliness after traveling without Guillermo for a year. Guillermo learning the right way to rub the lamp (the lamp Nandor got in Al Quolandar, during his world travels) is what finally summons the Djinn, leading to the wedding itself. Nandor's disappointment with his marriage plus Guillermo's new happiness in a relationship leads to Nandor trying to duplicate Guillermo's boyfriend (who he met in England, during his own travels), which leads to him giving said duplicate up - along with a two-year renewed quest for love - because his relationship with Guillermo matters more.

Guillermo invites a lonely Derek to the wedding - Derek who is alive because of him, Derek who is a vampire because of him - and learns he needs money. The kind of money Guillermo stole from the nightclub. The money that will make Derek turn him into a vampire.

Because nothing will ever change in the house unless he changes it. Because he's been the catalyst for every growing thing, every bit of forward movement, that has happened to the vampires for the last four years now. He's just grown enough that now he knows it.

#fandom: wwdits #what we do in the shadows #i am a meta gremlin #guillermo de la cruz #char: guillermo the relentless #i'm convinced he's going to get turned and march straight back home to show them #'surprise bitches i unlived' #'so what's next?' #that thing he says in s2 about the universe - dude's got something fated about him #he's a rock thrown into still water and i love that for him

[xoxoladyaz]

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Stranger Things (TV 2016) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington Characters: Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley, Dustin Henderson, Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Eleven | Jane Hopper, Will Byers, Mike Wheeler, Lucas Sinclair, Erica Sinclair, Gareth (Stranger Things), Jim "Chief" Hopper, Joyce Byers, Jonathan Byers, Argyle (Stranger Things), Nancy Wheeler, Billy Hargrove, Tommy Hagan, Vecna (Stranger Things), Henry Creel | One | Vecna, Sam Owens (Stranger Things), Corroded Coffin (Stranger Things) Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Female Steve Harrington, Smut, Rock Star Eddie Munson, Eddie Munson is a Mess, Eddie Munson is Whipped, Jealous Eddie Munson, Oblivious Steve Harrington, Strangers to Lovers, Corroded Coffin Concert (Stranger Things), Love at First Sight, More Like Love at First Blow Job, Blow Jobs, Hook-Up, Sex, Oral Sex, Cunnilingus, (eventually!) - Freeform, The Upside Down is Happening in Modern Day, TikTok Famous Erica Sinclair, Cinderella-ish, BAMF Steve Harrington, Corroded Coffin isn't from Hawkins, Hints of Past Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington, Team Give Robin Buckley a Supermodel Girlfriend, Crack Treated Seriously, That Is America's Ass Summary:

In which Stevie Harrington unknowingly hooks up with world-famous rock star Eddie Munson once, pulls a runner on him twice, and in turn inspires Corroded Coffin's record-breaking single and a global, fan-wide search for Eddie Munson's Cinderella and - hey, is that Eddie Munson's Cinderella cutting apart a monster with a chainsaw?

(Or, Stevie tries to not fall in love and fails, Eddie wants to put a ring on it but needs to find her first, Erica Sinclair livestreams The Apocalypse Version 5, and Chris Evans gladly agrees to give Stevie the title of Captain America if she agrees to go on a date and starts a blood feud with Eddie Munson in the process.)

#surprise bitch #it's me hi I'm the problem it's me #back again with yet another wip #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #rockstar eddie munson #stevie harrington #female steve harrington

[mikussabbath]

Three years after Advent Day, Sephiroth Returns.

They fight, Cloud wins, it's the same song and dance as always. But does it have to be that way?

Sefikura Week 2024 Day 1 - Surrender

#sefikura #sefikura week #sefikura week 2024 #I'M BACK BITCHES! #insert gif of surprise bitch scene from ahs coven #you know the one #anyway big comeback nyello i missed it here :) #sefikuraweek

[roxyandelsewhere]

"I'm not a damn thing but this time that lasts between running from finding myself and finding myself while running." (x)

SPN moments but abstract [17/?] - The ouroboros of Carver era Dean, aka "what if Dean's present had been presented as connected to his past"

inprnt.| society6 | ko-fi

#SURPRISE BITCH! BET YOU THOUGHT YOU'D SEEN THE LAST OF ME (i feel like it's not the first time i say this) #spn #spnart #spn art #spnabstract #mine.caro #i keep having art hiatus i'm sorry. but i refuse to make art feel like a chore so sometimes my brain says NO and i say Okay :( #anyways i'm back babeyy #ok so. what do we have here this time #this post has so many links posting it feels like a whole thing. i'm gonna add this one to the stores now uwu #this was motivated by my frustration with carver era dean having all these things happen to him that feel like punchlines to his whole life #but they're not presented that way. he becomes a demon after All That in previous seasons and the connection isn't made #hence the FMI line. i did josémáriobranconatural again but i had to #i wrote a list of bullet points when i was trying to figure this one out and it says: #'Hunting monsters while running away from becoming one and becoming a monster by how he hunts them in purgatory and with the mark of cain' #'Running from becoming a demon until daddy's little girl breaks in thirty and is pulled from the rack by an angel #and then is killed by an angel and becomes a demon' #'Black eyes and branded arms pointing death at the family he's become a monster out of the vow to protect' #and lastly you can't have a visual essay on performanceboy without touching on that part so this is supposed to look #like we're seeing it all through a window. suburban house window even #i thought it'd be more visually interesting if the lines of the window weren't there but you can also see it as the window not being there #and there you have it folks. finally a new one!! #pros: i'm drawing again. cons: i'm still in the spn pit

[georgipopovich-voiceblog]

The Next Best Thing: Celebration

"You be safe." Georgi strokes a thick curl out of Sergei's face, only for that same stubborn lock to find its way right back to where it was. "And you be good for Uncle Vitya and Uncle Yuuri. If they tell you to stay with them, you STAY. Got it, moya zoloste?"

"Yes, mama." Sergei says, his soft voice a contrast to his larger frame, despite being eight years old. He's much bigger than the other kids in his class, though one may not guess by his tender nature, or by his sweet acts of friendship when first meeting him. He has his father's big genes.

Georgi lets go of his shoulders, his free hand settling on Serik's arm. "We'll call if something changes, and you do the same, alright?"

@aiotabek

#SURPRISE SHORTY #bitch I'm back by popular demand

[elizaxspears]

I’ve just gone through and watched all the Black Butler musicals pretty much back to back and I have to say, my only biggest gripe with all of them, is the lack of William in his PJ’s during the Circus arc. He wore them for such a brief time, I feel robbed! Give me more content with Will in PJs damn it!

#black butler #kuroshitsuji #william t spears #william t. spears #I'm on a William kick again #No surprise there #I litterally almost started crying just thinking about him #He's my comfor character like no one else is #I'll keep crawling back to William #It's been 15 years and this bitch is still living in my head rent free

[fuckmeyer]

i like to think that anything i put in a post is Fuckmeyer Lite™ & for y'all to see all the premiere batshit content i manage to shove in the tags you gotta smash that like & subscribe button. call that Fuckmeyer Pro™

#no tags here besties #this one's a freebie for all the vanilla users out there #see this is how you nab 'em #they look at these innocuous tags & they think 'oh THIS is Fuckmeyer Pro™ PLEASE i puke in a post and hit send this is nothing' #but then why would i say it? with a name like fuckmeyer you would think one has to be a little unhinged right? quel mystere.... #so the curiosity niggles at them. like 'hm maybe there's something i'm missing here' #they scroll through some of my posts. surprise bitch i powerwashed these bad boys before posting this #you think i don't know how to play 4D chess???????? rook to d7 how bout that #i am GNAWING away at you like flesh eating bacteria #that's how i weed out the incurious anti-intellectual weaklings #the strong ones know. they hear the whispers from the moots. 'gotta go back & read fuckmeyers tags so raw so unhinged so profound so sexy' #they follow. they stick around. they hear nothing from me. i am a rock. i am an island. i am a simon & garfunkel reference. #weeks later. BAM. 2-line post with a 1k-word shitpost essay in the tags. surprise motherfucker. bet you thought you seen the last of me #welcome to the circus fellow clowns #honk honk bitch

[nyerusnova]

TGCF having the return of the Audio Drama and announcing the next season of the Donghua on Qixi, which is basically like Chinese valentine's day.... 🥺❣️Ah, Hualian!!!🥰 They deserve that!

#tgcf #hualian #like it's so 'and they're THE lovers of all time' lmfao #but actually the audio drama is INSANE for just straight returning without any warning and dropping the new episode too like #surprise bitch bet you thought i was dead but actually i was just waiting for them most possible dramatic return 😎 #once more fuck censorship tho the AD shoulda never gotten pulled in the first place smh #but I'm very glad that it's back and 😳 featuring some... spice!!!! 😳 #hopefully everyone and everything is safe 🙏

[legendary-alliance-stance]

honestly kaineng city, both old and new, are so fascinating to me. the old city had literal layers upon layers of buildings, and beyond the area surrounding the palace, it was all... honestly really shitty. just a rough place to live from what i recall of the quests in the city in factions

and you might think new kaineng is better! but it still has so many issues.

i know that theoretically the in-game maps are not Exactly To Scale accurate to what places are like in-universe, but like. grub lane is literally right next to where there's risen literally crawling out of the woodworks. and sure the eyes of the ocean apparently protect the area from the risen but like

imagine living right next to where there's risen. just. all the time.

kaineng city, both old and new, fucking suck to live in unless you're high up the food chain lmao

#it's honestly really interesting to see how the new city still has the exact same problems of the old city #of the areas where the 'lesser' citizens live just. being absolute shitholes. #sure new kaineng is all high tech and fancy! but the lower wards get shitty tech. #the cobble ward canonically is a rough place to live because of it. #and what a surprise it's where basically the entire city's tengu population is!!! #man. i'm so mad we moved on from cantha. there's so much going on. #even with bitch fuck outta the way the purists are still such an underlying issue in cantha #the way that the city is set up is PROOF of that #rRRHGH. anet let me back into cantha. i'm going to fucking lose my mind.

[blackbirdffxiv]

.

To the people who knew me back in WoW I would like to issue a formal apology because Ellie from WoW was an absolute twat who, if given the power to, I'd punt into their next life.

Because today I was reminded just how much of an ass I used to be under the guise of "being real".

Like you ever just look back at how you used to be and wonder "who tf is that?" Cuz right now that's me. And I had people tell me "oh everyone was like you back then, you were barely into adulthood" (cuz I was only 19-20 years old when I started getting into the RP community in WoW full-time instead of raiding) and I can't help but look back and go

"God damn, why was I such a dick? And why didn't anyone call me out on it?"

#OOC #Mun Rantings #Today is just one of those days where I am reflecting on who I used to be #And whenever I look back I just can't help but hate myself even more than I do now #because good god back then I was INSUFFERABLE #Like people think I'm mean NOW they didn't know how I was back then #And back then my justification for being a bitch was literally me saying I was being honest #I was being honest alright just an honest asshole and not the good kind #Anyways thanks to folks who knew me back then and stuck around for the character growth #Because I sure as hell am surprised still to this day that I changed so drastically

[butnobodycame627]

hhhhhhh I can't have nice things

#well I can but I'll face the consequences #oh what's that? you wanted to have a nice day and fun times? well you are now cursed with horrible stomach pain and nausea!! #go die in the bathroom and try not to wake up your mom because it's midnight #okay she wouldn't mind if it's for this but I'd feel kinda guilty #I did wake up my dad because I needed. someone. to help me. I might cry fuck #surprised I'm not already crying my eyes out but maybe I'm just too tired #anyone else get that? we're you're too tired to spend the extra energy crying? idk #I think it's mostly over now maybe?? but fuck man it might come back #I guess I ate a lot today so maybe it's from that maybe? or maybe my illness is just being a little bitch for no reason #it could maybe be an allergic reaction I guess but I was just with family and my family is usually careful enough to avoid- #-cross contamination so idk #guhhh I am. dying. I am dead actually. this is my tortured ghost soul haunting my sad little tumblr blog

[torgawl]

okay but gege has the opportunity to be really funny this week (bring nobara back it's a threat)

#or next week because it would be actually hilarious if he let us mourn her and then said surprise bitches #yes i'm still being delusional idc nobara isn't dead she can still come back and on this hill i will die #jjk spoilers

[marminko]

Y'know I never expected angst from u lol

Its come to my attention that peeps don't know my content creation history

#Bro.... #i dunno how to tell you this but uh #angst is my bread and butter #like ive made some really sad shit over the years #honestly I'm surprised with how little starry has in his back story #regis is jus my favourite old man to make suffer #Cygnus is the one causing the angst #like a bitch #answer

[lil-artist-blog-fandoms-ocs]

Experiencing the desire to knock out the door to the batim discord server and show folks my WIP because it looks epic to me

But I'm a coward, so everyone interested may look under the cut

I'm trying to think of the way to redo these flowers, but for now I have this

#mun talks #I haven't been there for...a year maybe? I'm not sure #the folks there were nice and chill #but it was so long i feel like if i come back there I'm gonna look like a yeti or smth #just a cryptid that was thought to be not existing #surprise bitch #I'm alive