#terra just trying to keep a part of himself alive that whole time hurt me

[scalacaelumx]

I will return to this land...and protect...my friends!

Day 7 of KHtober

#kh #kingdom hearts #khtober2023 #khtober #terra #extremely experimental I just kind of slapped things on it to see what stuck #terra just trying to keep a part of himself alive that whole time hurt me #but at least he had some help! #scala art

[sincerlypadfoot]

Maledicite Terrae (12)

Word Count-1993

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I quickly shut my alarm off and jumped out of my bed, grabbing the clothes I had set aside last night when Sirius and I had gotten home from the beach, intentionally late because we chased each other in the woods.

“Good morning,” Sirius croaked walking into my room, covering his eyes as he walked in. “Sorry,” He said turning around, I slipped my other leg into my jeans and tossed my shirt on.

“It’s fine, what's the plan today, i’m pumped, and i’ve never been this pumped before,” I chuckled walking over to Sirius and uncovering his eyes.

“Well, I was thinking kitten,I liked that better than Jellybean,” Sirius winked walking over to my snowglobes and turned it on in entertainment. “You could be just a little baby kitten, my mom has a soft spot, and i’ll just sneak into our garage and take my motorcycle, I have the key and all,” Sirius said placing my snowglobe back down and pulling the keys out of his pocket.

“I agree,” I chuckled grabbing my bag and tossing it to Sirius. “Small enough to fit in that leather jacket pocket you think?” I said turning myself into a tiny kitten.

“Perfect,” Sirius said picking me up. “I like it better when you don’t talk,” He joked placing me in his pocket, I stuck my head out and watched Sirius walk down the stairs. “Truth me, you’ll wanna hold on, we’re going for a jog,” He whispered tossing my bag on his shoulder and walking downstairs.

“Is that Joises bag? and where did you get a cat from?” My mom said looking at me then connected the dots. “Where are you two going?” She smirked.

“To get my motorcycle, if that's fine, I won’t ride it around and it’ll just be-,” Sirius started mumbled but my mom stopped him.

“Be back by dark, and Fleamont will adore your motorcycle, it’s no problem dear,” My mom said to Sirius then looked to me. “Can never keep a secret huh,” She chuckled stroking my head.

“I’ll bring her back by dark, she’s in good hands Mrs. Potter,” Sirius said smiling and darting out the door, I turned back into myself pushing myself out of Sirius’ pockets just before.

“I wanna jog,” I chuckled brushing myself off. “And I can’t go so long without talking, it’s impossible,” I said making Sirius chuckle, we both started running, Sirius looked at me with his eyebrows raised.

“I didn’t picture you the runner type, wanna race, I know a shortcut to my house,” Sirius said pointing to a forest path just up ahead.

“Sirius Black you’ll know i’ll win,” I chuckled jumping in the air, four paws fell onto the ground, I looked at Sirius, we were both identical black dogs.

“Copycat,” Sirius barked making me laugh. “I pull the dog tail off better,” He growled making me chuckle.

“You with Sirius,” I laughed pushing myself to go forward, coming near to the path I jumped again landing on my feet, Sirius hadn’t turned back but just looked at me. “What are you doing Sirius?” I asked putting my hands on my hips.

“Nothing,” he chuckled turning back into himself. “Come on kitten, we’ve got plans,” Sirius said tapping my shoulder, I fell to the ground becoming a kitten again, Sirius picked me up from the ground and carried me towards his house. “I’ll knock on the door and run away, you just lay there and be cute, well you don’t have to try but you know,” Sirius whispered placing me at his doorstep, I laid down and looked up at the door, Sirius crawled into the garage.

“Hello?” A older lady said, I looked up at her and blinked my eyes. “OH what a cutie,” She cooed picking me up. “Curse whoever would just leave you like this, are you hurt?” She asked. I pulled my paw out and started liking it, blinking again.

“Regulas grab my wand!” The woman shouted, the sound of a motorcycle started up and the woman looked down at me. “What the hell?” She asked looked at Sirius who came flying out of the open garage. 

I jumped down onto the cement I had just been laying on and turned back into my brunette self. “Sorry!” I shouted running towards Sirius, he tossed a helmet at me and I jumped on. “We hate you!” I shouted making Sirius laugh, we zoomed out of the yard.

“Wanna go for a ride?” Sirius yelled, I slipped my hands around his torso and leaned my helmet on his back. “Hold on tight!” He yelled, Sirius sped up and I started laughing nervously.

“Sirius i’ve never been on a motorcycle before!” I screamed out of excitement, I watched the trees and building around us zoom by.

“Truth me Josie, i’ve never crashed this thing, thought i’ve only rode it twice!” Sirius shouted back.

“That’s very reassuring,” I chuckled tightly my grip. “Where are we going!” I shouted leaning my head off of Sirius and actually looking around me.

“Just a place, I told your mom i’d have you back by nightfall, it’s not nearly close to nightfall!” I heard Sirius say, I smiled taking my hands off of Sirius and tossing them in the air.

“I feel so alive!” I screamed, Sirius let out some howls. “I’ve never felt this alive!” I screamed tossing my hands into a T position.

“Okay enough, put your hands back I need to get you home in one piece,” Sirius chuckled, I smiled and tossing my hands back around him. “We’re here,” he said turning to a clearing and a hill.

“That was amazing,” I smiled jumping off of the bike. “How does the hair look?” I asked slipping the helmet off.

“Beautiful, i’ve tamed mine to not get helmet hair,” Sirius chuckled tossing his helmet off. “Come on,” Sirius said grabbing his keys and slipping them into his pocket. “I wanna show you something,” He smiled grabbing my hand and dragging me forward.

“Sirius Black I don’t run,” I chuckled running with him. “Where are you taking me?” I asked running up a hill now.

“We’re gonna watch the sunset, it’s the best view, and we can see almost all of London from here,” Sirius let go of my hand. I smiled and looked at the sight that was infront of me. “I hope you’ve packed a blanket, we’re gonna be here for a while,” Sirius chuckled tossing my bag down on the ground.

“I brought everything Sirius,” I chuckled looking around. “This is a amazing view,” I smirked watching people, they had looked like tiny ants from here.

“Your hairs pink,” Sirius chuckled walking over to me and running his hands through my hair. “It looks good like that,” He said looking down at me, his hand slowly went from my hair to my face.

“I can see the future,” I whispered. “I knew you were coming to my house because I had a dream about it, and my dreams are always right,” I admitted nervously smiling. “I’ve actually seen you in a lot of my dreams,” I said looking away from Sirius.

“It’s okay Josie,” Sirius said turning my head softy to look at him. “I’m glad you were the one who find me that night, i’m sure if James had found me I don’t think we’d be this close,” He smiled making me smile. “Tell me about them will you? Am I still has handsome has I am now?” Sirius asked making me giggle.

“Sit down Sirius, i’ll tell you everything,” I said moving away from him and towards my bag. “For your information you grew a very nice mustache,” I chuckled making Sirius gasp.

I placed my blanket down and laid my head on Sirius’ lap, I had told him everything, from my frist vision, to my latest, skipping the part were I had seen him die, I had pushed that moment in the back of my head. Hours passed by and Sirius had his hands tangled in my hair.

“You know that doesn’t make you a freak,” Sirius said taking his hand out of my hair. “Your perfect,” He said then looked up. “The sun is setting, look,” I sat up and turned towards the sun, the sky had colors of pink and purple settled across.

“It’s beautiful,” I whispered smiling and admiring the sun and the moment we were in. “We should be getting back now, you promised my mom you would have my back by dark,” I chuckled turning to Sirius who was looking at me and not the sunset. “Sirius,” I said waving my hand infront of his face.

“Yeah, yeah your right, come on,” He said standing up from the blanket and helping me up. “Tonight was good, it was nice, and i’m glad you trust me enough to tell me everything,” He said gathering and folding the blanket up. 

“Sirius I trust you like I trust James, maybe a bit more because I hadn’t even told James about some of the things I had told you,” I chuckled grabbing my back from the ground. “I’ll race you,” I said punching Sirius playfully on the shoulder and darting down the hill.

“You cheated!” Sirius yelled running after me, I could hear him laughing but I didn’t stop until I was at the motorcycle. “I demand a rematch, I wasn’t ready,” Sirius said out of breath.

“Another time, come on I wanna get home i’m freezing,” I said wrapping my arms around me.

“Take my jacket, it’s fine, I insist,” Sirius said taking his leather jacket off and wrapping around me. “Feel special, I don’t just let any girl wear my jackets,” He chuckled tossing me my helmet and jumping on the bike.

I leaned my head against Sirius the whole time, watching the sun go completely down as we rode home, the sky had turned dark and Sirius slid into our driveway.

I took my helmet off and looked around, turning my head to the house and feeling my heart drop. “Dean?” I muttered jumping off the bike. “Shit,” I whispered forgetting about our plans. “I am so sorry, I forgot we had plans and I was helping Sirius with something, I am so sorry,” I said again walking over to Dean.

“Really Josie, i’ve been here all day, when your mom said you went out with him I didn’t believe it, this is unbelievable, your the one who made the plans Josie,” Dean said standing up, I backed away and looked at him.

“I said i’m sorry, I had forgotten and you never really confirmed, we can do it another time Dean, it’s only the begging of the summer,” I said in disbelief.

“No, I don’t think so Josie, I can’t compete between him and me, you’ve gotten choice, him or I,” Dean said looking at Sirius who stood beside me.

“Dean you can’t be foreal,” I said looking at him. “Sirius is my best friend, i’m not gonna choose between you and him, that's just ridiculous!” I shouted, the front door opened and James and my parents all came up, my mom stopped the two from coming any closer.

“Josie there's your choices, it’s him or I,” Dean said walking passed me hitting me in the shoulder, James went to come out but my mom held him back.

“Hey man,” Sirius said, I turned around and looked at a pair. “That’s not how you treat a lady,” Sirius muttered, I watched his fist ball up, everything happened in slow motion, Dean had punched Sirius, my mouth dropped and arms wrapped around me, I watched as Sirius punched Dean and the pair dropped to the ground.

“Inside now!” My mother whispered pulling me in, I looked back at James and my father untangling the pair. “Go up to your room please, just please Josie, i’ll talk to you later,” My mom said walking away from me before I had time to say anything.

I looked back outside, Sirius and Dean were both equally covered in blood, my dad and James both standing beside Sirius. I took my eyes off and ran to my room locking the door and falling to the ground.

#Sirius Black #SiriusBlack #JosiePotter #Josie Potter #JamesPotter #James Potter #Remus Lupin #RemusLupin #marauders fanfiction #the marauders #hp marauders #Maraudersera #young marauders

[mimiplaysgames]

stay awake. love, sirens

Terraqua Week Day 5: Dreams

Summary: Dreams are made to be had, broken, and mended. Terra finds he still has his own, even in the thicket of his nightmares. @terraquaweek

Read on AO3

***

Just because the War is over, it doesn’t mean that everything is fixed. 

The Land of Departure may look like it’s in pristine shape, and for the most part it is. It’s missing one body, but all in all, it looks like everything has stayed in place, almost like it couldn’t exist without its proper inhabitants and therefore never aged. Like magic, it comes back. Like destiny, it sits there waiting for them to come home.

Things are only broken because they’re slightly different. Terra and Aqua are not equals anymore. 

In certain ways, they still are of course. She doesn’t want him to think of her as his superior. In all personal matters - in the kitchen, in bed, in friendship - they’re equals. 

Not with matters of the Keyblade though, and he remembers it every day. 

It’s time to address the elephant in the room: What are their futures going to be like now? 

Are there specifics? Does Aqua solely become Keeper of the castle? Can she share that with Terra or does he have to be a Master first? Should they consider Terra a Master already?

They stand in the entrance hall, where three wooden thrones sit patiently, in silence. 

Here, the awkward question is Who takes the middle seat?

“You should take it,” Terra says. 

Aqua immediately shakes her head, giving him a look of sympathy. “Terra, you knew him longest.”

“You’re still Master.”

“I honestly…” These words are going to be the hardest to hear, because they’re the easiest to deny. “I think the Master would have wanted you to sit there.”

Ventus stands by her side, shooting the both of them side glances because Yes, approaching the subject of who the Master favorited (Terra) will always be awkward.

For the favorite, he sure has had the most difficult expectations set onto his shoulders, and it’s a good twelve years of believing that he really fucked up last time. Aqua’s right but still - Eraqus was incredibly proud of her, and would still be, and would have wanted her to take his throne.

“Technically,” Ventus drawls out, “the middle is my seat. I’m the only one who bonded with it this entire time.” 

“So do you want it, Ven?” Aqua asks, like she wants to be rid of it.

“No way.” He crosses his arms. “I never want to sit there again.”

Dead end. 

Terra goes ahead to take the seat to the left, ultimately ending the discussion. Gestures over to the middle.

When Aqua takes it, she’s very hesitant. Ventus, usually the last one to decide, has no other choice but to sit on the one to the right. 

Ventus wiggles and stretches, like he’s trying to see if it fits him even though they’re all the same. “S’not bad.”

Aqua keeps her hands folded on her lap, like she has the proper regal formality for such a grand seat - if only she wasn’t looking so defeated. 

“You know, Aqua,” Terra says, playing with the marble texture of the arm rests. It’s not a comfortable seat by any means. “I never got to congratulate you.”

“For?”

“Becoming Master.” He wants to reach over and take her hand, because he needs comfort to deal with what he’s so ashamed of. But this isn’t about him, it’s about her. So he smiles. “Congratulations.”

Ventus brings his feet under and sits on his ankles, swinging over to face her. “Congratulations!” 

She doesn’t want the praise. “Please, don’t-”

“Why not?” It’s hard to be happy when she’s like this.

“This isn’t what I wanted.”

Terra nearly does a double take. “What are you-”

“The point was that both of us became Masters,” she says with conviction. “That was our dream.”

Again, such an awkward conversation, and Ventus sinks back into his throne, bringing his knees to his chin to shy away from it. Most of the time, it’s about the three of them, always, an unbreakable connection. There are certainly times when he’s the third wheel, though, unintentionally eavesdropping into matters that have really nothing to do with him. 

Terra knows she doesn’t mean what she’s implying. He knows it. He knows it, he keeps telling himself. “I’ll catch up with you.”

“That’s not what I meant.” She sighs, glancing over at Ven. She really hates leaving him out of conversations. “I was thinking maybe I’d renounce my title-”

“No.”

“I fell to darkness, too, Terra.”

“You deserve to be praised for your hard work.”

“What does it mean anyway?”

“It means you’ve survived things I could never have.”

He could never have, not the Realm of Darkness. He doesn’t have that kind of strength. 

It’s not that he feels necessarily insulted by the thought of her holding herself back for his sake, but that he’s guilty because she’s done too much for him. Not on any single fiber in his entire body would he ask her to suffer hell for him, but she did it anyway. She keeps telling him that she’d do it again if it meant he’d be safe. So yes, to hold herself back in a way is a slap to the face, because on some level he needs to get his shit together. Enough has to be enough, and he wishes that she’d let him pick himself up.

Of course, none of what she’s doing is meant to put him down… twelve years separated means that the both of them still suck at elaborating what they mean, and in these sticky situations, the best thing to do is to give the benefit of the doubt. 

“Besides, it fits you very nicely,” he says, forcing himself to smile. It’s only difficult at the first try, then it settles into his face and relaxes. He gets up from the throne, outstretching his hand for her to take. Glances at Ven as well, thinking of anything that could get him involved. “Maybe throw a small celebration for you, too.” 

Ventus stares at him wide-eyed, like he’s too scared to say anything right now.

Aqua doesn’t take his hand. “Why won’t you let me name you Master, then? You’ve been through a lot, too.”

“I want to do it the traditional way.” His hand stays in the air, waiting. 

“Terra,” she says softly, “you know you don’t have to prove anything to me.” 

“It’s not to you.” It’s to himself. 

She sighs - it’s been a strife to get her to agree and actually give him an exam, since she believes he’s putting himself down. In his mind, he needs the opportunity to stand up. 

Aqua takes his hand and rubs it with her thumb, her gaze falling to his knees. 

“I promise you,” he says sweetly - they may both be hard-headed, but the need to make her smile always trumps. “That dream is closer than you think.”

She scoffs, and he swears that whatever breath Ven has been holding this entire time is finally set free. 

~*~*~*~

If you really think about it, dreams don’t have beginnings. They just happen. 

A chessboard, mix and match black and white spaces, sprawled for miles under a purple sky with no clouds. 

Chess pieces at chest height. 

Black against white.

White is her, all of them, moving past him, approaching him, dodging many hims, in fact. 

“No,” he says.

But he moves anyway. He has no other instinct. 

Sword in one hand and a shield in the other, he’s a knight.

A knight is what she is too, a spear cradled in her arms. 

She’s sleeping as he approaches. 

She only opens her eyes when he stops to her left. 

“No,” he says.

But it doesn’t matter, because he swings that sword.

She wears the mask of despair but she doesn’t cry, like a satire.

Watch her as she blows up into a million dusty pieces.

Terra has a nasty habit, who is he to kill her when she’s the one he loves the most?

Many hims killing many hers because whoever is playing him in this game is pretty good. 

The white queen comes, twice as tall as him, with a staff held high like she’s a saint leading a crowd.

She holds scales on the other, and the feather in one of them is too heavy.

“We’re supposed to be on the same side,” he says. 

She opens her eyes. White on white on white, no irises.

“You spoke?” she asks before she strikes him down. 

Chess has only one hit point.

Dreams don’t have endings, either.

~*~*~*~*~

“It’s a bad dream,” she whispers to him before he finally allows himself to breathe. 

Shivers, headaches, sobs, and stiff muscles - so much that his whole body hurts. 

Not to mention the fear of being alive and all the other damned symptoms that come with the nightmares.

She waits to hear his breaths slow down into a crawl before she wraps his fingers in hers - they both know, from experience unfortunately, that accidentally scaring him is a bad idea. 

“Welcome home,” she coos into his neck, her fingers brushing his hair. “I’m happy you’re safe. You’re here with me. Whatever it is, it can’t harm you here.”

Reminders. He needs them, and she needs them. 

He groans. He can barely remember what the nightmare was except for the nauseating suspicion that he has done something terrible.

“You’re okay?” he asks her, like he’s expecting her to be hurt.

She chuckles, stroking him arm. Her voice is hoarse with exhaustion. “Of course I am. The question is, are you?”

He doesn’t answer her. 

Usually after his nightmares, his needs are random and yet, predictable. A walk in the woods. Some water. A bath with her. To be read a story. To beat on the pillows. Yell. Cry. Tell some jokes.

She doesn’t question any of his whims, choosing to stay by his side for whatever he needs.

Tonight, he wraps around her, feeling the softness of her skin, which he’s glad is nothing like porcelain. Keep her close, keep her locked tight. He takes the blankets and layers them on top of her, and she has this amused grin on her face as he does so - if this is what he needs, she’ll play along and not ask what on earth he’s doing. He wraps her enough that if anything were to strike, it’d hit his arms first. Intertwine her legs with his to keep her extra secure. 

She replies with soft kisses on his cheek and deep sniffs of his hair, and he waits until she’s asleep first to be extra sure.

~*~*~*~*~

He feels better in the morning, when he runs laps in the courtyard, still so early that the sun hasn’t yet broken through the fog.

He feels better after a shower and some coffee, even though it still doesn’t make him feel like that much of an adult.

He feels better when he sees Aqua still sleeping in his bed - she normally likes to wake up early too, but when he has bad nights that interrupt her, her body demands its rest. It’s good knowing that he hasn’t ruined everything for her - she looks so comfortable bundled up in those layers. 

He feels better when he gently kisses her cheek and leaves her to dream, finding someplace in the library to spend time reading books.

Being a Keyblade Wielder is not just about knowing how to fight with it; that’s what all these books are for. Who knows how many are in here, maybe thousands? He’s read most of them but these days he still needs answers. 

He sifts through ones he’s read before, to see if all this experience might give him a completely new perspective on the battle between darkness and light (white and black). He’s also looking for ones he’s never seen before, hoping that there is some answer in there to help him sleep at night. 

No luck.

It’s only when footsteps approach that he realizes he’s been obsessing and lost track of time. Again.

“Look what I found,” Aqua announces, displaying a long wooden box with a rusty brass lock. 

Keyblade Wielders believe in light. They believe in the stars, which teach them that light will shine down even among a dark sky. Sometimes, their wise lessons are rough, heartbreaking, confusing. 

Sometimes, the stars think they’re funny when they’re trying to be serendipitous. 

“The Master’s old chess board,” Terra answers.

She sets it down on the table, and with the careful way she’s opening it, Terra can tell that she had waited until he was with her before peeking inside. 

It’s in surprisingly good condition, the spaces clean (with one side chipped, Terra can’t remember who did that), and the pieces pristine in each of their unique designs. It smells musty, very much like the Master if he was close enough to hug. 

“It makes me really miss him,” she says and she might as well speak for the both of them. 

There’s so many good memories over this game - the Master never allowed room for any arguments, any disagreements. This game was strictly a test for analysis, for nerve, for patience. Even when playing opposing teams, this game is and will only ever be made for friends. 

Terra and Aqua of course played against each other but their favorite version is when they tag-teamed against the Master. 

Young children would break the rule that banned arguing, ordering each other which piece should go where, but with enough vigilance (and enough years), Terra and Aqua learned to trust. Don’t tell the other where to go, watch for clues of what they’re thinking, let it be and have faith that their partner has a plan and if it changes, hopefully it’s for the best. 

Besides, if they sat there discussing all of their strategies in detail, then the Master would know (not that it helped, he always won). They used to hope that one day, they’ll finally beat him.

Eraqus was a man who kept his personal life very private, and it’s one of their lingering questions - who taught him to be so good? They’ll never know.

“We’ll never be able to tag-team again,” she says to Terra, setting up the game and putting the pieces in their proper places. Twelve years did not make her forget. 

“We could on Ven,” he says, before realizing how dumb that sounds.

“We’d pulverize him.” She shakes her head compassionately.

The board is prepared, and she spins it, giving Terra the white pieces.

“That means you’ll go first,” she says.

Every game of chess, at least to him, starts off pretty plain, but she’s an aggressive player. A sinking feeling in his stomach burns when he takes one of hers, but she always comes around to show him who’s boss.

Not that he particularly cares about winning this time.

“We used to pretend to be the pieces when we were little,” he says, a memory coming to defend him from the more gruesome images from the dream last night. “Remember?”

She’s about to put down a black rook but stops herself to laugh. “We did, wow, I completely forgot.”

“That would put you today as… I guess the Queen? Queen and Master of the castle,” he announces, using a bishop to take her pawn.

“And that would make you…” she makes a condescending face. “The King? You sure you want to be that one?”

Even pawns are better - he can sacrifice one for the good of many, and sometimes they can become Queens themselves, like a backup. 

Take the King and it’s over. 

“No, he’s completely useless. I’ll be your other Queen.”

She lifts a black knight into the air, above the board. “We wanted to be knights together.”

“That’s right.” He holds up a white knight, crossing it with hers. “Knights that would save the worlds and all other Kings and Queens out there.”

“What do you think? We’re still knights?”

“Hm.” Sometimes, more than he likes to admit, he thinks of her as his superior, like he isn’t good enough and never will be and there’s no telling why she would settle for him. But this is a horrible thought, and she’s his partner. Always, they said to each other. “We’re still knights.”

Her eyes sparkle. “Good.” She uses her knight to take one of his pawns - putting his own Queen into a precarious situation. “Now we just have to prepare your Mark of Mastery exam.” 

Terra takes a sharp inhale - layers his arms over the surface of the table and for some odd reason, he’s nearly moved to tears. “Thank you,” he whispers. 

“You’re very welcome.” She waits for his move.

But he bides his time. “How do I know I’ll get a fair assessment when I’m sleeping with the Master who’s conducting it?”

She bites her lip, watching him knock her knight out of the board with his trusty white bishop. “I’ve thought about that and… I’ve decided to invite Riku to help me run the exam. He’ll watch you and promised to give his honest opinion.”

For a moment he forgets what his gaming strategy is supposed to be as she moves another knight. “That’s honestly a great idea. He’s better at this stuff than the both of us really.”

“He is, the little prodigy.” 

Aqua’s now distracted and has neglected to really protect her Queen. He moves a knight in. “That has to be the easiest checkmate I’ve ever experienced,” he proclaims leaning back as his hands interlace behind his head. 

“Well, you’ve cheated.”

“How?”

“Because I wasn’t at my A-game.”

“You’re such a sore loser.”

“Takes one to know one.” She leans on her hands, biting her lip and it makes him want to bend over and kiss her. Thinking of doing that over the Master’s ancient, precious chess game seems violating, though.

But it’s moments like these where it gets him to think that there’s not a definite timeline for dreaming. Some will wait, others will pass, and there are some that morph and become different.

Here is Aqua though, in her grace, companionship and loyalty to him, making dreams come true. He feels better.

#terraqua #terqua #terraquaweek #terra #aqua #kingdom hearts fanfiction #kh fanfic #terraqua week #OMG #i'm so excited to release this one!! #my fic

[plumedesimili]

Merged - Vanqua Week

Challenge: #VanquaWeek Day 3 Word Count : 1500

When Aqua opened her eyes again, she felt helpless.

“I see that Ventus is going to be completely useless… Not that I’m surprised.”

She was panting, down on one knee, staring at Vanitas. She was losing, and there was no way out of this. She was too tired to run. She was out of magic. Her HP was running low. Terra was somewhere up there fighting Master Xehanort, and Ventus was… He was…

It hurt to admit Ventus was in such a bad shape, but she could see his motionless body in the distance, behind Vanitas. She knew she would lose because no matter how much she worried about him, her body wouldn’t let her go back to her feet and run to him. His helmet was crushed, his face pale behind the shattered glass. And Vanitas would kill her before she could check on him.

“He wouldn’t believe we’d need a backup plan”, Vanitas snorted, walking slowly to her. There was no need to rush, after all. She wouldn’t go anywhere. She was too weak for that, he made sure of it. “Now, Master, it’s time for you to lend me that Light of yours.”

“My… Don’t… No…” She could barely fight back with words. She was worn out, conscious and alive thanks to her will only, and keeping her eyes open took all the strength she had left. He kicked her and she fell face on the ground, and she could feel the taste of blood in her mouth. He kicked her once more, flipping her to her back as if she was just an inanimate object. She was fighting to stare at him. She refused to give him the satisfaction of passing out. All she could see was her own reflection in his helmet, and she wondered if he was smiling, or looking angry. What did he even look like? Was it really the best time to wonder about this? Was there any better time to wonder about this? She was about to die anyway. She didn’t like the idea of dying without seeing the face of the one taking her life. She didn’t like the idea of dying, either. She was too young to go. How old was Vanitas? If she had killed him, would he think that he was too young, too? It didn’t matter anymore. She was the one dying anyway. He was about to stab her with his keyblade. The last thing she’d ever see was that disturbing blue eye staring back at her.

When Vanitas opened his eyes again, he felt sick. He didn’t know what to expect from merging with someone, what having another heart inside his would feel like ; he didn’t like it.

What… What is this place?

He cursed. That wasn’t part of the deal. They were supposed to forge the X-Blade, but he couldn’t see it anywhere.

I’m… Lonely.

Had the old man lied? Or was Ventus really the only one? Vanitas thought he only needed to fight someone with a Light as powerful as his Darkness ; there was no one shining brighter than her.

No… You’re lonely.

Was there any way for him to go back? He didn’t get what he wanted. Instead, he got this voice echoing in his head, a soft, gentle voice without the hate he was used to hear.

Is this your heart?

He wanted to go back to Ventus. To try to merge with his, to cancel his poor choice. He wanted her out. He wanted Ventus back in.

Is this pain all yours?

He wanted to go back to the one he used to be. The one he sometimes remembered. He had been foolish to merge with someone else - hadn’t his name been Ventus all along?

All this suffering… Is it all you can feel?

He just wanted her to shut up. He just wanted to go back five minutes ago, to never merge with her, he wanted her to stop existing in the world, to stop existing in his heart.

Vanitas… I understand.

He didn’t want her to understand.

You just wanted to be complete, don’t you?

He didn’t need her to analyze him.

I can feel all your pain. I can feel what you feel. I can feel what you want.

He didn’t want her to feel anything. He wanted her to feel pain, but not his.

This place is crawling with unversed. They are scared. They are not attacking me.

He wanted them to attack her. He wanted them badly to do so, but he could barely control them when they were outside his heart, let alone inside it.

Is it why you attacked me? So that you could pretend you were not scared?

Why wouldn’t she shut up? Why wouldn’t his Unversed attack? Why couldn’t he even release a single one? Did being complete mean he couldn’t set them free? Did trapping her Light mean trapping his own Darkness within as well? That was troublesome ; but not as much as her voice inside his head.

It’s strange. I should be angry at you. But there’s so much anger around me already, it would feel pointless. I’ve never seen anyone so angry before.

He was angry. Angry at her, mostly.

I’ve never met anyone so sad before. So lonely. So desperate. Your Unversed… Were they a cry for help?

Of course they weren’t. He didn’t need help. Especially not hers.

There was something weird. It felt a bit like a pain in his chest, except it didn’t hurt. It felt warm, strange, unusual. But not bad. Which was exactly why is was weird.

So they do like petting!

Was that a giggle he heard? A giggle? Inside his OWN heart? That was a huge no. And what was she doing to his Unversed? Petting them? What did she think they were? Cute little animals?

There, there. I’m sure there were better options for you, but I’m all you have now. You’re not alone anymore. There’s someone by your side, now, for better or worse. So don’t be sad. You’re not alone.

Was she even talking to him, or just to his Unversed? Was she dog-sitting inside his heart? He wanted to be disgusted, he wanted to be angry, but she was doing something weird to his Unversed, and all he could feel now was being slightly annoyed. It wasn’t who he was. He didn’t want to be soft. And he didn’t, really didn’t, want her inside his head forever.

There was only one solution left. He had failed. There was no X-Blade. Xehanort would never let him come back to him with such a failure. Vanitas was as good as dead. So it was either death, or a life with an annoying conscience trying to teach him to be a better person. He never wanted to be better. He just wanted to be whole.

He grabbed his weapon with his two hands, and gulped. He had come prepared to die, anyway.

Don’t be afraid. I’m right here.

He turned the weapon against himself, and stabbed his own chest, in a quick, determined motion, before he could regret it.

When they opened their eyes again, they were both in the Keyblade Graveyard. They were both alive. And they were both shaking.

“You are… Why?”

“You freed me.”

So not only did he fail to forge the X-Blade, but he also failed to take his own life? Wasn’t his life just a succession of failures? He fell to his knees, despair invading his chest.

That warmth, again. This time, it didn’t come from inside, but from outside. She had thrown her arms around him, squeezing him gently. Was she trying to choke him? She would have to squeeze tighter. He didn’t even feel threatened by her move, but then, what was she doing, if not trying to kill him?

“It’s okay. Don’t be sad. Don’t be afraid. You are not alone anymore.”

Why? Why wasn’t he angry at her? Why did her words tightened his heart so much? Why did his vision get so blurry? All he wanted to do was to hold her tight. All he wanted to do was to put his forehead on her shoulder anymore. But that wasn’t him, that wasn’t who he was, so why did he want all of these stupid things?

“I’m here now. You’re not alone anymore. You don’t have to be alone anymore. Vanitas.”

Who cared about why he wanted these stupid things? He wanted them. He wrapped his arms around her body, his helmet vanished, and he started sobbing against her. She didn’t say anything, she just held him tighter, gently rocking him.

Xehanort would kill him for failing.

Ventus would kill him for laying a hand on Aqua.

Terra would kill him for existing.

He didn’t mind. He never cared about living much anyway.

Even though she might have taught him that there were things in life that were worth living for.

#fanfiction #kingdom hearts #aqua #vanitas #vanqua #collection #vanquaweek #vanquaweek2019 #merging with the mum friend #any longer and she would have told him to eat his greens

[ravenaveira]

Who’s most likely on the chopping block SPOILERS AHEAD

Ok in the latest trailer we see literally everybody's getting bodied and it looks like pretty much everyone's gonna die or at least a majority of them will but realistically speaking I dont think KH3 is gonna be THAT dark

HOWEVER I do believe there will be SOME deaths as KH3 is supposed to be the darkest kh game I dont see Nomura letting this be a and they all lived happily ever after ending, but I believe its going to be a more bittersweet ending where the good side wins but at a great cost

So the next question is, whos actually gonna die? well I have some theories on whos the most likely to die and whos most likely gonna survive

For starters Mickey Donald and Goofy are pretty much set in stone they’ll be fine, its not TOTALLY impossible but I highly doubt Nomura or Disney would kill off those iconic characters so lets just mark them off right now to the SAFE list

Aqua, Terra, Ventus and Lea are more unknown, they could die or they could not but I’ll explain why its so up in the air

Aqua can and will be saved so it doesnt make much sense for her to die after we go through all this to save her, that being said she could die trying to protect everyone just like she did in the past but I still think to bring her back only to kill her off is highly unlikely so IMO Aqua is safe

Terra is a gamble, hes been on thin ice since BBS and I always assumed he would eventually die anyway I just didnt know when but I always figured he would eventually muster up the strength to free himself and die to protect his friends, I felt like Terra would possibly end himself to prevent Xehanort from using him to hurt any more people, in this case, I see Terra possibly doing that in this situation and I feel like Terra’s ‘death’ is long overdue since at least to me its been hinted thats where his arc was heading since the end of BBS, so IMO Terra is marked for death

Ventus is also a high possibility, if it wasnt Xehanort it was Vanitas trying to kill Ven although in Vanitas case his reasoning is alot more complicated but the fact remains they have both tried to ‘kill’ him in some way shape or form and have been searching for him for years and now that they’ve finally FOUND him the chances are pretty high that Ven is gonna die, he is in a VERY vulnerable position and unable to fight or defend himself and thanks to Aqua nobody knows where he is or how to save him so Ven is definitely in the danger zone and thats why IMO Ventus is hanging by a thread

Lea is a gamble too, he’s already ‘died’ once, became Axel, died again and became Lea again, to have him die a 3rd time seems excessive but it would be heart-wrenching if he is killed by one of his former friends Saix, Xion or Roxas which although having Lea die AGAIN as I said would be excessive this would DEFINITELY be a dark and tragic ending for Lea and the impact would be much bigger than it was the previous times and it’ll hold that much more weight to it seeing him suffer from the loss of Isa and then keep remembering Xion and Roxas as well only to have one of them be the one to take him down for good is just beyond sad, so even though it may be excessive the impact would be massive which is why IMO Lea is marked for death 

Now to move on to the main two, Riku and Kairi

For starters even with my personal bias against Kairi Im not stupid enough to think shes gonna die infact I think its the opposite, Kairi is HIGHLY unlikely to die and here’s why

She’s part of the main trio that we’ve followed from the start, she’s Sora’s love interest, she’s technically the main female, she’s a princess of heart, she’s a keyblade wielder, in other words she’s too tightly woven into the story that for Nomura to take her out would not only be bold af but also extremely unexpected, its not often that you see a member of the main cast killed off but if they are its almost never the love interest which is why I believe Kairi is safe

Their also hyping up the romance way too much for them to just kill her off, unless this whole ‘oath’ and ‘dont think twice’ is just one big red herring and they pull a 180 not only would that be risky af but also pretty danm genius cuz nobody would see that coming but I will not be mad at it and infact would appreciate Nomura even more for takin such a huge risk that not many others would take, although I already know majority of the fandom wouldnt agree with me on that and I think Nomura is aware of the shitstorm he would get if he did that aswell so yea Kairi is definitely safe

Riku not so much, unlike Kairi, Riku is not a love interest or atleast not the one Nomura intended, true Riku is also a part of the main trio but the rival/best friend always has the higher chance of dying to protect the MC than the main female/love interest does

You also have to look at Riku’s character arc, his growth from giving into the darkness and doing horrible things to his journey of redemption, I believe his final atonement would be giving his life to protect Sora who in the past he had hurt so much, this and it leaves Sora still alive to save the world and defeat Xehanort since in the scene we see Sora doesnt have his keyblade and hes on his knees about to be attacked by a swarm of heartless and Riku being the last man standing protects him and if not for Riku, Sora would have died there, but Riku despite all odds against him, gives his all in protecting Sora

Someone made an interesting comparison of when Axel was fading away after ‘putting his whole being into an attack’ from the looks of the trailer Riku is DEFINITELY giving his all in this attack, Riku is ready and willing to die for Sora which is why Riku IMO is marked for death

But I also dont think Riku is gone for good, I think he might become a nobody and he IS the only one in the main trio who hasnt had a nobody, granted because he’s never been in a situation TO have one but now is the perfect time with the perfect setup for this to happen and come into play

How exactly this will play out in the future? I have no idea and until we play the game I cant think of any theories BUT I dont think Riku’s gonna be gone for good, I think he’ll have a Lea situation where he becomes a nobody, ‘dies’ then returns to being his somebody again, or in other words is revived/reborn

Anyway thats all for my theories on who’s most likely to die on the heroes side but what about the villains?

Saix is definitely marked for death, same for most of the seekers of darkness, Vanitas and Ventus MIGHT actually make peace and accept one another and reunite so in a way you could say Vanitas ‘dies’ or he could go tragically and be killed being separated from Ven forever once again

And of course Xehanort is definitely gonna die, he’s the only one I am atleast 98% sure is going to die because at this point he has to unless they go the Iron Blooded Orphans route where literally almost all of the good guys DIE and the bad guys actually WIN with our heroes just having to live in hiding defeated Xehanort is almost gauranteed to die so IMO Xehanort is dead

Now to explain my ranking before I end this post so some of you who may be confused understand what I mean

Marked for death - means they have a target on their back and are within the enemies crosshairs and are highly likely to die unless they are saved by some deus ex machina and a miracle happens

Hanging by a thread - means that they are close to death but not quite sure if they’ll actually die hence why their hanging by a thread, maybe it’ll snap maybe it wont just gotta wait and see how things play out

Safe is self explanatory and the same applies for Dead

Thats everything, let me know if you agree or disagree or you think someone else will die that I didnt mention and why

#kh3 #trailer spoilers #kingdom hearts #theories

[bowandarrowgirl]

You’re Not As Lonely As You Think You Are (I’m Trying to Tell You) - Chapter 8: Golden Girl (I’ll Keep You Forever)

Read on AO3 

A/N: Sooooooooo, I thought about if they were all teenagers in real life, which actors would portray them. To be honest, I couldn't really come up with any for Drax, Rocket and Groot are both CGI anyways so they're good, Shuri and Little Peter are already considered 'teens'. So I came up with Megan Nicole as Gamora (yes, I know she has kind of a higher-pitched voice than Zoe does, but I still think she'd make a really cute Gamora), Madilyn Bailey as Nat, and imagine Nat Wolff WITH STRAWBERRY BLONDE HAIR, as Peter?! Idk, it was just an idea! XDD Anyways, enjoy! <3

They run. They leave Homecoming and run. They had managed to wake Drax from his unconscious state, but Gamora was still in a state of shock before they left, causing Peter to pull her to her feet and hold her upright as they ran.

Peter digs around in the pocket of his pants for the keys to the performing arts building. Once he finds them, he unlocks the front door, immediately guiding the group to the choir room.

After everyone is safely inside, Peter locks the doors and turns on the lights. Luckily, the only windows in the room are attached to the doors.

Nat and Shuri guide Gamora to one of the chairs, Peter's maroon, leather jacket loosely covering her bare shoulders. Her arms are still wrapped around her abdomen, trembling slightly.

"Gamora, what is going on?" Nat asks in a tone in what seems like she had asked for the hundredth time.

"It's my sister-she's insane." Instead of looking at the girl in crouched in front of her, her gaze is towards the dirty floor.

"Gamora, you told me Thanos-"

"She's adopted." She snaps, immediately regretting it and finally giving Nat an apologetic look. Her eyes rip away from Nat's and shift back to the floor. "I'm not the only one Thanos took from their homeworld."

Shuri crouches down besides Nat, resting an assuring hand on Gamora's bare knee. "Your sister-what does she plan to do?"

"I don't know exactly what she's up to, but I know she's after this orb. I was on a mission to find it before I crashed here. She thought I had it-" Gamora takes a deep breath before standing up and walking towards the piano. "If it's anything like I think it is, we might be in trouble."

"Then, we need to stop her." Peter chimes in, slowly approaching her.

"It's not just her we need to stop-she joined Ronan."

"Wait, who's Ronan?" Peter asks with a raised brow, the rest of the group watching their conversation intently.

"A Kree fanatic who works for Thanos."

The mention of the name sends chills down Peter's spine. Gamora has told him of the pain Thanos inflicted, not only on her, but millions of innocent people around the universe. She has told him what he's capable of and his one and only goal: to eradicate half the universe.

"Ronan may have killed my lover, Hovat, and my younger sister, Kamaria, but Thanos is by far the strongest being in the universe. I will accompany you on your quest to find this orb. Then, I will kill Ronan and avenge my family's deaths." Drax was very silent until that moment. He crosses the room to join Peter and Gamora near the piano.

"What exactly is this orb?" Peter asks, completely brushing off Drax's entire speech. "From what it sounds, it seems like some kind of weapon."

"I don't know what it is."

"If it's a weapon, we should use it against Ronan."

Gamora's head whips around to Drax. "You fool! You'll destroy us all!" Maybe snapping from a comment as small as that wasn't her best move, but it was too late.

"Or just you, MURDERESS!" Drax steps closer, pissing Gamora off even more so.

"I LET YOU LIVE ONCE, PRINCESS!" Gamora finds herself looking straight up at him, baring her teeth.

"I AM NOT A PRINCESS!" The tattooed boy stands up straighter, glaring at the smaller girl in front of him.

"WOAH, WOAH, WOAH! Nobody is killing ANYBODY in my CHOIR ROOM!" Peter puts himself between them as they continue to glare at one another.

"It ain't your choir room, dumbass." It's that stupid raccoon and giving tree whom always manages to find themselves in the same room as him.

Peter rolls his eyes and turns his head to said duo. "Can we help you? What are you even doing here?" The raccoon doesn't reply, giving Peter a vexing smirk instead. "Let me guess? Profit?"

"Oh, hell yeah!" Rocket crawls off Groot's shoulder and scales up the piano to gain the attention of the others. "I know someone who's very trustworthy and is willing to pay a whole lotta units for that orb."

"How much?" Peter asks in curiosity, oblivious to Gamora's annoyed eye roll.

"Four. Billion. Units." The emphasis on the three words captures Peter's attention as his eyes widen.

"Holy shit!"

"Yup! About a hundred thousand times the amount of Yondu's bounty on you. Groot and I were gonna go after it, but when we heard Greenie over here mumbling somethin' about the orb, we thought we could use a few extra humies."

"And what makes you think we'll help you?" It's the first time Gamora speaks up since Rocket started talking.

"Cause', I have a big gun that could disable your mods and kill you in an instant."

"I am Groot."

"Shut up, Groot."

"I. Am. Groot." The tree says with more force.

After a few moments, Rocket crosses his arms and rolls his eyes. "Fine. Groot says we'll split the profit between everyone who gives us a hand."

"If I gave you my hand, it would require me to sever it off, disabling the ability to be helpful with it still attached." Everyone's jaws drop at the amount of stupidity they had just heard.

"It's an expression, dipshit." Rocket explains with another eye roll.

"I will never understand Terran sayings."

"It's not exclusively from Terra. People say it all the time."

"We're getting off track!" Gamora interrupts, watching as Drax and Rocket exchange a look and shrug their shoulders in unison.

"Are you in or not?"

Gamora's brown eyes find Peter's. He looks at her with the same grave expression, subtly nodding at her. There's that look in his eyes. The same look he had when she came out of the dressing room at Forever 21 in the outfit he picked out for her. The same look he had when he noticed she was finally able to start reading paragraphs on her own. The same look he had when she finally joined in on the choir ritual. The same look he had when he finally had the guts to ask her to homecoming. The same damn look he had when he kissed her. That genuine, caring look in his hazel eyes that she trusts more than anything in the universe. There's nothing selfish in them either, meaning he has a ethical reason behind agreeing, and he would explain later. She knows him and she trusts him.

With that, she turns to Rocket and sighs. "Yes, but if you do not undertake your part, I will be sure to skin you alive, Rodent. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Greenie, I do."

"If you guys are really considering this, you better make sure this buyer is trustworthy. If something happens that this 'orb' is a weapon and it's in the wrong hands, who knows what could go wrong." Nat states, putting a hand on Gamora's shoulder. The green girl nods in unison with Peter.

"How do we get off this dumb planet without confronting the director?"

"Well, Big Guy! I have a plan-"

Although Nat is training to be a spy for S.H.I.E.L.D., she has very awful plans, which is why Gamora, Drax, Peter, Rocket, and Groot are fully equipped to leave Earth and are on their way to headquarters. The entire building is built underground as a bunker at the edge of the city. The only section visible is a small dome-shaped structure made entirely of one-way glass, and the secret hangar roof behind it. Two men in S.H.I.E.L.D uniforms, guard the steel double doors to the structure.

It was a long drive from their dorms to headquarters-approximately four hours to be exact. So, yeah. It was a long drive. Not to mention being in a small Volkswagen van with seven people, three of which were not as friendly as the others (well, the tree's okay). It's a miracle to get out when they arrive.

Nat's plan was simple: she and Gamora will gang up on the guards and knock them unconscious. Then, they would all sneak into the docking bay and board Peter's ship.

Therefore, they put the plan into effect. Within seconds upon reaching the small structure, Gamora and Nat sneak up behind the guards and kick them square in the back of their heads, watching as their bodies fall limp to the ground.

Peter flinches a little as their bodies hit the pavement. "Ooh, that's gotta hurt." He whispers as Nat grabs a key card from one of the guard's pockets and unlocks the door, following the group inside.

They all scuttle into a confined elevator, uncomfortably close to one another as they ride down to the docking bay. As they exit, they are spotted by two more S.H.I.E.L.D agents, who immediately get swept off their feet, due to Gamora's quick reflexes.

"What does your ship look like?" Shuri asks as they spread out, scanning each of the unique aircraft.

"It's the Milano-the blue and orange M-ship."

"The Milano?" Nat asks with a raised eyebrow. "Like the cookies?"

"No, Alyssa Milano, duh!" Nat pinches the bridge of her nose.

Gamora crosses her arms and glares at Peter. "So, who's this 'Marissa Milano'?" She asks skeptically. Of course, it wasn't out of jealousy. Gamora wasn't the type to be 'jealous'.

The boy gives her a small smirk, notching the hint of jealousy in her brown eyes. "Alyssa Milano." He corrects.

"Whatever."

"She's an actress. I had a huge crush on her when I was a kid."

"You're still a kid." She points out, glaring at him more intensely.

"No reason to be jealous."

"I'm not jealous."

"Okay."

"Can you makeout later, Lovebirds? We found your ship." Rocket announces, rolling his eyes.

"This is your ship?" Peter nods his head proudly. "No offense, but it looks like a piece of shit."

"Wow. Thanks Nat." Just then the alarms start blaring, meaning that somebody spotted them. "Hurry! Get on the ship!" Peter yells over the alarms as he lowers the ramp. Groot, Rocket, and Drax quickly obey, the original four staying behind for a moment longer.

"Go." Shuri says, gesturing to the ship with her head. "We will stay behind and cover you."

"Thank you." Gamora wraps her arms around their necks as Peter makes his way up the ramp, not completely entering the ship until Gamora follows him. The ramp closes behind them as Nat and Shuri start running for the exit.

They arrive at the temple on Morag, only to find out that Ronan's right hand beats them there. Luckily, it seems as if they haven't exited their ship yet.

Gamora whips her head around to the group. "Korath is here."

"Lemme guess? Ronan's henchman?" Rocket asks, crossing his arms.

"You could say that."

Peter eyes Gamora again as if they read each other's minds. "Okay." He says, staring her in the eyes a moment longer before focusing on the rest of the group. "Here's the plan: Gamora and I will break into the temple and steal the orb. Drax, you'll follow and cover us. Rocket. Groot. You two will stay here, protect the ship, and get ready to take off as soon as we get back. Got it?" Everyone nods. "Good. Let's go!"

It's eerily easy to obtain it, only requiring the use of a gravity mine. However, there's never any sign of Korath or his Sakaaran soldiers. That's what puts Gamora on edge. "Peter, something isn't right." She states, reaching for her Godslayer.

"Okay, well, let's go!" He begins to walk out of the temple bumping into a Sakaaran soldier. "Oh, shit."

"Drop it!" A deep voice booms as a man, who looks partially like an android, enters.

"He will do no such thing, Korath!" Gamora spits through her teeth, extracting her sword and charging towards the man with a loud war cry. Drax follows suit with his daggers. "DRAX! PETER! GET TO THE SHIP!" Drax jabs one of his daggers into one last soldier and obeys almost immediately. "PETER!"

"NO! I'M NOT LEAVING YOU!" Peter shoots another Sakaaran that had entered the temple.

"GO, PETER!"

Peter hesitates. "Shit." He mutters under his breath, shooting one last soldier before bolting to the ship. With one last cry, Gamora drives her sword into Korath's abdomen, immediately following Peter. The boy pulls out another gravity mine, throwing it at the Sakaaran soldiers running after them. Gamora ducks and rolls her eyes as Peter yells back an apology. As soon as they have boarded the ship, Rocket turns on the thrusters and flies them to safety.

After the coast is clear, Peter meets Gamora on the lower deck. She watches as he places a small box into a weird contraption built into the Milano.

"What is that?" Gamora asks in curiosity with pursed lips.

"It's called a cassette. It plays music, see?" Peter presses a button and turns a dial as music begins to fill the ship. A huge grin creeps onto his face once he notices the corners of the green girl's lips twitching up. It only grows when she begins to subconsciously bob her head to the beat.

"What?"

It doesn't take long before Peter realizes he's staring. "Nothing." He scratches the back of his neck. "Um...just-do you trust them?"

"The only one I trust in this ship, is you."

Peter glances up at the stairs leading to the cockpit before focusing back on Gamora. "How much you wanna bet they'll ditch us after we receive the payment?" He asks almost inaudibly.

"As long as they don't give us a reason to be suspicious, we shouldn't worry too much about it."

"So, we're partners then?" Peter closes the distance between them.

Gamora crosses her arms and stares up at him. "We had an agreement, but I would never be partners."

"Does that include me?"

The green girl leans in as if to kiss him. She pauses, lips only millimeters away from his. "Especially you, Peter Quill."

He feels her breath against his lips and opens his eyes to see that she had snuck away before they could kiss. A slight chuckle escapes from him as he turns around to see her walking up the stairs with an extra sway to her hips. "Oh, it's on."

Knowhere is practically a place for outlaws, or so Gamora says. It's a grungy place and highly polluted. The streets are packed with aliens of all species, most of them looking homeless, mean, and dirty. They pass a building with a colorfully lit-up sign as a bouncer throws a patron out.

"The buyer's in there?" Peter asks staring as the patron slowly gets up.

"He told me we have to wait for his representative or whatever." Rocket explains as they continue walking.

"This is no respectable establishment. What do you expect us to do while we wait?" Drax asks with a hint of a pout.

"The museum is inside of a bar." Rocket states, stopping in his tracks and turning towards the group.

"There's no way they're going to allow us to drink. We're underage."

The raccoon bats a paw at her. "Psh! They don't care as long as they get units." He starts walking back to the bar with Groot following closely behind.

Drax shrugs and follows suit, leaving Gamora and Peter alone. "I'm gonna fill up the Milano. You coming?"

A sigh escapes the Zen-Whoberian's mouth. "I would, but I still don't completely trust those three. I'll keep an eye on them and meet you inside." Peter nods and plants a quick kiss to her temple before walking back in the direction of the Milano.

It's barely half an hour when Peter returns to the bar, finding her out on the balcony as she cleans her sword. He walks out casually and stands next to her. "Man, you wouldn't believe what they charge for fuel out here. I might actually lose money on this job."

"Doesn't surprise me." Gamora says dryly. "They're making us wait." She sheathes her sword and turns towards Peter with a perturbed expression. "Why did we agree to this, Peter?"

"You wanna escape from Thanos. I wanna escape from Yondu. We're gonna want to leave the academy eventually." He takes a deep breath and sets his forearms on the top of the balcony railing, leaning against it. "I also thought maybe we could leave together." He mutters it under his breath, hoping Gamora would hear it as much as he didn't want her to. He stares out into the void and snaps out of his thoughts as a green hand is gently placed on top of his. Turning his head slowly, he realizes that Gamora is gazing at him with a soft smile upon her lips.

"I-" She was cut off by the sound of a rousing bar fight, involving Rocket, Groot and Drax.

"Oh no." Peter moans, walking past Gamora and entering the bar. She follows suit, noticing Drax being strangled by Groot.

The muscular teen rips himself free of Groot's vines as Rocket powers up his gun. Before he can go after Groot again, Gamora pulls him up by his arm. "STOP IT!"

However, it doesn't stop Rocket from aiming his weapon at Drax. Peter steps in with a defensive hand, blocking his view. "WOAH, WOAH, WOAH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

"THIS VERMIN SPEAKS OF AFFAIRS HE KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT!" Drax yells trying to push out of Gamora's grasp to get to Rocket.

"THAT IS TRUE!"

"HE HAS NO RESPECT!"

"THAT IS ALSO TRUE!"

"HOLD ON! HOLD ON!" Peter steps closer to Rocket as he starts to aim his gun again.

"KEEP CALLING ME VERMIN, TOUGH GUY! YOU JUST WANNA LAUGH AT ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE!"

"Rocket, you're drunk, alright? Nobody's laughing at you." The Terran does his best to calm the raccoon down, but the small creature continues.

"HE THINKS I'M SOME STUPID THING! HE DOES! WELL, I DIDN'T ASK TO GET MADE! I DIDN'T ASK TO BE TORN APART, AND PUT BACK TOGETHER, OVER AND OVER AND TURNED INTO SOME...some little monster-"

"Rocket, no one's callin' you a monster."

"HE CALLED ME VERMIN! SHE CALLED ME RODENT!" He screams, pointing to Drax and Gamora respectively. "Let's see if you can laugh after five or six good shots to your FRICKIN' FACE!" Rocket starts firing up his weapon again, causing Drax to try to go after him again.

"NO, NO, NO, NO! FOUR BILLION UNITS! ROCKET! Come on, man. Hey! Suck it up for one more lousy night and you're rich."

The raccoon hesitates for a moment, finally lowering his weapon with a sigh. "Fine." He says with a slight crack in his voice. "But I can't promise when all this is over I'm not gonna kill every last one of you jerks."

Peter rubs his temple until he hears the last part of the sentence and throws an accusing hand in his direction. "SEE! THAT'S EXACTLY WHY YOU THREE DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS!" He looks around at the other two, finally giving Gamora a sympathetic glance. "Five seconds after you meet somebody, you're already trying to kill them!"

"We have traveled halfway across the quadrant, and Ronan is no closer to being dead." Gamora pushes him away as he pulls out of her grasp.

"Drax!" Peter calls, watching as the musclebound teen walks away in anger.

"Let him go." Gamora says, placing a gentle hand on his arm, not taking her eyes off of the direction in which Drax was headed. "We don't need him."

"The beings they call Rocket and Groot," A pink Krylorian calls from a doorway near them. "I'm here to fetch you for my master!"

#starmora #starmoranet #Stamora #star lord x gamora #gamora x star lord #Starlord #peter quill x gamora #peter x gamora #gamora #Guardians of the Galaxy #gamora x peter quill #peter quill

[angel-with-a-pipette]

Title: Sleepless Night

Summary: Sleepless nights were something Aqua was accustomed to now. On her usual trip to the kitchen in the middle of the night, she finds out that she isn't the only sleepless person that night.

This is a story for @terraweek ‘s prompt “free choice”. I hope Aqua doesn't steal Terra's spotlight too much :/

Rating: T (for canon violence mention)

Also available on: ao3

Please enjoy!

A silent gasp escaped Aqua as she set up instantaneously, her whole body trembling. She intuitively roamed the ground beneath her, grasping at the sheets that were wound tightly around her legs, breathing heavily until her eyes picked up a tiny light in the corner of her eye. She turned to it.

It was a small, flower shaped night light Ven had brought into her room to help her sleep. It did help; she progressed from sleeping less than two hours at a time to being able to sleep for up until five hours. It helped remind her that she was back in the Realm of Light and not stuck in the Dark Worlds anymore.

Her breathing evened out as the rest of her surroundings reappeared: Books and their bookshelf slowly took shape again as well as her small work desk in the other corner of the room. Aqua’s hand twitched slightly at the movement behind her chair until she recognized the curtains, swaying softly in the warm summer night. She raked her fingers through her hair, tousling it up even more, and  breathed heavily when she reached for the alarm clock with her other hand.

2.30 am.

Aqua sighed. She might me able to sleep longer at a time, but waking up in the middle of the night usually meant a very early morning for her. Reluctantly, she untangled herself from her stuffy bedsheets and stretched at the edge of the bed before getting up and scratching her neck. A cup of tea might be enough to calm her nerves a little and maybe it would help her at least take a short nap...

She left her bedroom and slowly trudged through the hallway. She arrived at Ven's door and stopped shortly before she cracked it open a little. She couldn't peer inside, but the soft snore told her it was one of the few nights Ven was able to sleep; thankfully, once he did fall asleep, hardly anything could wake him up until morning. Aqua closed the door gently with a smile on her lips, until she turned to the room that lay across to Ven's. Her heart fell.

It was Terra's room.

He had returned to them two weeks ago, after a long and grueling fight to get him back that left him unconscious for a few days. According to Aerith, physically he was mostly fine, but she saw that he had changed.

Terra had always been the silent type, but he seemed even quieter now, spacing out at times, not paying attention to his surroundings. He spent a lot of time in his room alone and while Aerith had told her that it was normal and respected for his recovery – after all, his mind was still coming to terms with handling four different sets of memories and life experiences in one body and it tired him out immensely – Aqua still couldn't shake the feeling that Terra was trying to avoid people – and mostly her.

And she couldn't blame him. She had messed up after the Mark of Mastery exam, she hadn't trusted him despite knowing him for the better part of her life and she helped pushing him even more into Xehanort's clutches.

Aqua sighed.

It did her no good to ponder about this now and it wouldn’t help Terra either if she woke him up in the middle of the night. She threw a last lingering glance at his closed door and continued down the hallway, not paying attention to the soft light streaming out from under the kitchen door until she had already opened it.

At the sight of those achingly familiar blue eyes, Aqua’s heart stopped.

Terra sat in the middle of the corner booth, a huge steaming cup cradled in his hands. He looked up at her in surprise, the dark purple bags under his eyes so much more pronounced than she remembered this morning. His hair was mussed up and despite the warmth of the night, a light blanket was thrown over his shoulders.

The sight of him was so utterly heartbreaking that she couldn’t stand it anymore. Personal boundaries be damned, time be damned, he couldn’t continue to keep his hurt to himself and –

Terra lifted his cup to her in silent invitation, an insecure smile on his lips.

Suppressing a relieved sigh and on the edge between walking and running, Aqua made her way across the kitchen, sitting down next to Terra, just as uncertain as him. Wordlessly, Terra handed her his cup and she smiled at him in thanks, bringing the edge of it to her lips. She relished he taste of the hot black tea with just the right amount of sugar to taste.

Terra didn’t utter a word and Aqua chose to keep quiet as well, the only sounds being their cautious sips as they drank from the cup alternatingly, and it felt surprisingly comfortable. Aqua threw a curious glance up to Terra from the corner of her eye. With a frown, she realized that the withdrawn expression was back on his face and letting her eyes travel down slowly, she noticed how his tank top stuck to his body with sweat.

“Nightmares?”

He gave a noncommittal grunt, but Aqua saw his eye twitch. She bit her lip for a second before scooting closer, their bare thighs now touching. She felt Terra tense up, but instead of backing off, she grabbed the edge of the blanket that lay abandoned on the bench and wrapped it around her shoulder to preserve Terra's warmth.

“I have nightmares sometimes,” she opened up to him. “I dream that I am back in the Realm of Darkness, with countless of Heartless attacking me. Most of them are small and rather harmless, but the big ones...,” she lowered her head. “I don't sleep well. It's hard to suddenly give up your instincts that helped you survive for 12 years. But Ven helped me.”

She felt Terra's shoulder shift – he had turned to her a little, listening intently. She smiled.

“He somehow got a hold of a nightlight for me. To be honest, I haven't even thought about the problem being the Darkness itself, I thought it was natural for me to process everything that happened with nightmares, but the first night I slept with the lamp plugged in? I felt like a new person. I'm not good, but I am better.” She licked her lips. “Maybe we can help you get a little better, too?”

They settled back to silence, tea cup long empty, and Aqua considered brewing a new one when Terra finally answered her.

“It's complicated,” he told her, and Aqua immediately reached for his hand that was resting in his lap to encourage him to go on. He gently squeezed her hand in response.

“Memories are coming back to me. From my time as Lord Ansem's apprentice, as his impersonator, as Xemnas.” His shoulders drooped. “It's exhausting. Sometimes it's so overwhelming I can't even sit straight and need to lie down. And in the night? I get nightmares. It always starts out with the most grueling memories of the day-” he swallowed, “and then I dream of a boy named Roxas. He was part of the Organization and looks just like Ven, you know? I dream about how Xemnas abuses him and I can't tell whether it's true or not because I still lack some of his memories.”

He took a shaky breath.

“And then the dream shifts and I see you.”

Goosebumps covered Aqua's arms and she felt Terra shiver distinctly, too, before he continued.

“We're in Radiant Garden. Xehanort had just taken over my body, but I was fighting against him. I was fighting so hard against him, and then you came. You ran towards me, I saw you, I wanted to scream at you to just attack me, but instead I reach out for you and grab your throat.”

Terra raised his hand to look at it incredulously and as he did so, an itch returned to Aqua's throat, the memory of his ruthless touch embedded in her forever.

“I know I let go in reality. Thank God I did let go. But I never do in my dream. I keep pressing on, watch your eyes slowly roll back. I see your limps go slack, your face turn blue and your head loll back. And I still keep pressing on.”

He furiously raked his hand through to calm himself.

“I keep doing it until I have enough satisfaction of watching you die and I just dispose of you. The moment your body hits the pavement with a sickening crack is the moment I wake up every night.”

“I'm here,” Aqua interrupted him, stroking his arm softly with her free hand, “I'm alive. Ven is safe, unharmed. He's sleeping in his room. He's actually snoring right now and probably drooling on his pillow.”

That finally seemed to loosen the atmosphere – first slowly and quietly, then openly Terra shook with soft laughter and Aqua saw him wipe away a stray tear from the corner of his eye.

“He slept 12 years and still needs more sleep. This boy burns way too much energy at day.”

“You wouldn't believe it,” Aqua chimed in and the two of them smiled at each other for a second before Terra let go of her hand. Disappointment shot through Aqua, having become way too comfortable snuggled up to her friend but instead of pushing her off him, he grabbed the edge of the blanket and lay his arm around Aqua, pulling her close and effectively pressing her against him. A small blush spread onto her cheeks, but Aqua embraced him with a smile on her lips, closing her eyes. She felt Terra place his other arm around her, too, and felt him sigh deeply as he gently pressed his head against hers.

“Thank you,” she heard Terra murmur into her hair and she squeezed him little.

“Don't hide from us anymore, okay?” Aqua mumbled as a small yawn escaped her, “It's easier when you're not alone.”

She felt him nod in response, but before she could continue, Terra's warmth and his soft breathing had lulled her back to sleep.

“Aqua? Aqua, wake up.”

Aqua didn't answer, instead she snuggled further into her pillow.

Some kind of light flashed behind her eyes. Confused and still groggy, she waved her hand in the general direction of the light, indicating for its cause to leave her alone, whoever this was.

“You know, I probably regret this even more than you, but it's 8 am already and, you know, Kairi and Lea are kind of waiting for you?”

8 am? Kairi and Lea?

With a start, Aqua shot up, but a pair of strong arms prevented her from sitting up fully. Only then she realized that she was still in the kitchen since last night, sitting on the corner booth and using Terra's chest as a pillow. Heat shot up her face immediately and another flash occurred. She turned her head to its source and saw Ven standing on the other side of the table with a cheeky grin, a camera in his hand.

“What are you – Ventus!” Aqua gasped and untangled herself as gently as possible from Terra's strong grip, sitting up and smoothing down her hair.

“Sorry,” Ven grinned at her, “Believe me, I would have let you sleep, but I know you wouldn't appreciate being late to your lectures –”

“I already am late, Ven!” Aqua puffed angrily, but relaxed a little when Ven's teasing grin morphed into a genuine smile as his eyes wandered over to Terra. She followed his glance and saw Terra sleeping with his arms crossed in front of his chest, head dangling forward precariously now that he didn't have Aqua's head to rest it upon.

“You two talked, huh?”

“Yeah,” Aqua answered, smile playing along her lips, “I think things will finally start getting better for all three of us.”

Another flash, and Aqua turned around angrily.

“Ventus, I swear –!”

“I'm done, I'm done!” he laughed with his arms up in surrender and started walking towards the door before he turned back to face Aqua again. “Kairi and Lea are waiting in the gym. I've told them to meditate until you're there. And tell this big doofus over there,” he nodded at Terra, “he's bad at pretending he's asleep. And he better be at lunch so we can finally catch up. See you later!”

Before Ven even closed the door behind him, Aqua turned back to Terra, her mouth open in shock. And indeed, Terra sat in the same position as before, only now, his eyes were open and a frown was etched on his face. Thankfully, the dark circles under his eyes weren't as pronounced anymore as they were at night.

“Since when have you been awake?”

“Since Ven entered the kitchen. He started laughing like crazy, ran out to fetch his camera, rushed back in and took at least ten pictures before he even attempted to wake you up.”

The slight blush on her cheeks from before returned twice as fierce, spreading down to her neck and chest.

“I thought you weren't going to avoid us anymore,” she huffed indignantly.

“I'm not, I promise,” he answered sincerely and finally got up from his seat, stretching a little and scratching his stomach before stepping up to her. Aqua's heart leaped up – she had forgotten how much Terra towered over her. “But I wanted to talk to you in private. It's the first time I was able to sleep peacefully. I can't remember having a single nightmare. Thanks to you.”

“Yeah, me too, even though the position was rather awkward, I haven't slept this well in ages,” she answered softly, then bit her lip. “I'm sorry, I really have to go and-”

“Can we-,” Terra grasped her shoulders in desperation and Aqua opened her eyes wide upon his action. He backed off of her immediately, looking to his side, but she wouldn't have any of it

“Yes?”

“Could you maybe...,” he looked at her out of the corner of his eye, “...stay with me tonight? To keep the nightmares away?”

Aqua felt her heart speed up, but she smiled and reached out for his right hand, just like she had years ago in the Dark Realm. This time, it was his real hand, it was warm and she could really, truly pull it close and cradle it to her chest while she looked up to him.

“Whatever it takes.”

#terraweek2018 #Terra #Aqua #Terraqua #Ventus #KH #Kingdom Hearts #Alja's fanfictions #terraweek

[stuckinmy-wonderland]

“So, it was you...”

Terrqua (Terra & Aqua) angst!drabble

A/N: In case y’all can’t tell, 0.2 is getting to me… [enjoy!]  I actually made Aqua aware of Xehanort’s presence inside of Terra (not, ‘oh terra!’ ‘I’m Xehanort’ ‘O.O *cricket*’) This was an inspiration from a “four-word challenge” that I reblogged some time ago. Good to know that one out of 40 is done... ^_^

______

      It can’t be…  How did I of all people manage to find him here… here in the realm of darkness.  How did I of all people fall...

      Aqua stopped, suddenly aware of some presence in the figure she saw before her.  She knew the familiar clothes, the posture, the armor gaurdbrace that ran all along his left arm… but the aura he emitted was not the same.  She summoned her keyblade in a quick flash of sparkling light.

      “You’re not Terra…” she said.

      She couldn’t believe it. Right after she’d thought she’d found him lost in the realm of darkness, it wasn’t actually him.  Just his possessed body.  And the heart of his that still lay fighting hard within.

      His figure spoke without turning around; the white, stuck-up hair slightly bobbing.

      “So, it was you.”

      Aqua’s nerves tensed at the sound of the voice, gripping her keyblade.  It didn’t match the original; as she knew what it sounded like.

      “It was you who has pursued me all the time through the darkness.  And for what?  To save a friend that is already gone?”

      Aqua burst to defense. “No!  Terra is not gone!  He still has possession of his heart.  I know he’s fighting the darkness in his heart in order to take it back!  So that way…” she stopped, clutching a hand to her chest.  “He can come back to me… and Ven.”

      That dark voice that was never Terra’s laughed loudly as he turned around and revealed gold eyes.

      “That may be true, but he’s still not strong enough to take it back and be in full control.”

      Aqua whipped her keyblade – Stormfall – in the air.

      “Stop telling lies!  I know what I know about my friends!  You know nothing about them!  Meaning you know nothing of Terra!  So stop trying to convince me of something that I know is not true!”

      She charged at him. Swiftly leaping into the air, Aqua raised her keyblade for a strike.  Then she realized what she was attempting to do.  The instant she hesitated, Terra’s body hastily summoned Master Xehanort’s keyblade – No Name – and blocked her high attack.  A futile attempt.  Their keyblades locked with sparks as did their eyes.

      “Give.  Me.  My friend back!”  Aqua yelled.

      The Xehanort part of Terra just smirked at the same time his eyebrows lowered a bit over his eyes.  That forbidden gold color that was never destined to be there. There was not a trace of his original bright blue hues.

      Aqua pushed off his keyblade with hers and leaped back a safe distance away.  She had to speak with Terra!  Even if just for a moment.

      Quickly, she peeked at her blue wayfinder in her other hand while whispering, “Ven, help me achieve this to bring Terra back.”

      Desperate to have just one moment with her best friend, Aqua aimed her keyblade towards his chest.

      “What are you doing?!”  He demanded.

      “GO!”

      Bright colorful lights burst forth from her keyblade’s end and rushed forward.  The lights enveloped him; circling around him faster and faster.  In pain, he clutched both his hands to his face.  Suddenly, he gave a cry when the array of colored lights all combined and sunk through his chest and diminished.

      At once, his writhing stopped and Terra’s white hair darkened back to brown.  Soon, his eyes blinked unbelievingly…and blue.

     Aqua had unlocked the light trapped inside Terra’s heart, if only for a moment, so she could speak with him.    

      “It was always you.”

      Terra’s voice.  It was Terra’s voice.  Not Master Xehanort’s half.

      Aqua froze.  Was she dreaming?  If it was, she didn’t know what to say.  She had too many things to express that would never all be revealed in whatever amount of time that she had at this moment.

      It almost seemed that Terra was ashamed to face Aqua.  He casually turned away.

      “It’s best if you forget about me.  It’ll make your journey easier.”

      “No!” Aqua cried, “If I do…then, the darkness will slowly creep in.  Terra, it’s been you and Ven that’s kept the light alive in my heart.  Because you and Ven mean everything to me.  You’re not just my best friend… you are a part of my family and I love you for that!”

      Silence.  Not even the slightest movement had come from his form.  Had he even heard her?

       “Terra…” her voice broke in time with the tears on her cheeks.  “I just can’t forget about you... I just can’t…” she involuntarily sniffled and looked down upset that her emotions flowed so easily out of her.  But he was that important to her.  There was no way she could not say it knowing that she might not ever see him again.  “I-It’s you, Terra.  No matter how long I’m here, trapped in this realm, somehow, I’ll find a way to bring you back.”

      Something soft and gentle embraced her wet cheek. Opening her eyes, she raised her head to see Terra’s face above hers.  His large hand caressed her cheek and pulled them together ‘til their foreheads touched.

      “Aqua,” Terra whispered.  “I’m sorry if what I just said hurt you.  I didn’t know that you felt like that.  I… also…” he faltered.

      Terra made a slight face at himself for messing up. Instead, he leaned down and lightly captured those lips that always formed the best words and wisdom for him. Aqua’s eyes fluttered closed as her hands searched for his.  She placed her left on his wrist still holding her cheek and grasped her right around his other hand hanging at his side.  Terra didn’t linger; he kissed her sympathetically for a very short time and then drew back, so he could look into her eyes.

      “I said I would pay the price, Aqua… no matter what.”  He began.  “But now… I understand that I simply can’t lose you or Ven.  The both of you make up my whole world, regardless of what worlds we’ve been to already or seen with our own eyes.  The only world that I want to protect is the one that involves both you and Ven.”

      “Terra–”

      “You’re what keeps me strong too.  Aqua,” here he took both of her hands in his, “Promise me you’ll resist the darkness.  It’s the only way you can save Ven and me, also… I couldn’t bear the thought of you falling down to where even I couldn’t reach you…even if I wanted or tried too.”

      Aqua brought her hand up to the back of Terra’s neck.  She pulled him gently down and he obeyed; bringing his ear to her lips.

      “I promise.”  She whispered.  “The darkness can’t hold you forever.  I know your heart is as strong as mine.”

      She heard his breath catch in his throat. Suddenly, with great force, Terra clung to her form.  His form bent down to hide his face in her shoulder to conceal the silent tears of pain and longing.  What he wouldn’t give to save her from the realm of darkness and be with her and Ventus again.  Aqua smiled and embraced him compassionately.  She constantly wished to live in this moment forever.

      Yet the words they had exchanged will always exist forevermore in their hearts.  Words that were etched into their very existence and onto the most important part of the body.

      “I’ll always be with you.”

      “I know.  We’ll exist in each other’s hearts until we meet again.”

~END.

#kingdom hearts #kh bbs #terrqua #terra x aqua #kh #writing challenge #so it was you #four word challenge #angst drabble #birth by sleep #i wrote a thing #kh 0.2 bbs #kh afp #a fragmentary passage #.2 got to me... #<3 #*cries after reading* #what did i write?!

[occasionalfics]

Cross the Stars, part VIII

part vii, part viii.i 

A/N: So the first two sections of this are short and the third rounds out the word count, but it’s very. Long. So I split the last section of this into its own section because the rest of it is almost as many words as this entire part is. Enjoy!

Summary: Indriza is more confused than ever before. Her heart yearns for one thing, her head for another, and nothing will work in her favor. But now the stakes are higher than ever, and she must make a decision, even if it’s not the easiest one.

Words: 3,530

~~~

For days after, Indriza is inconsolable, but she is good at hiding it. Or getting good at it, anyway. Allura does her best to help, but her attempts at brightening Indriza’s world are futile - which is far from her fault, Indriza knows.

“You can be happy with me,” Allura offers.

Indriza knows it is not an attempt to force a monogamous relationship, but to fill her heart and mind with love and attention. She smiles at Allura gratefully.

“I am,” she says. And she is, but she feels incomplete still.

“Then what is wrong?” Allura asks.

“I may have broken him.” Indriza thinks about how defeated Yondu looked last they met. He saved her, and her repayment was rejecting him, pushing him away based on prejudices placed against him by Stakar Ogord. She didn’t want him because he saved her anyway, but to have left him in such state only made her feel like a monster.

“He is Yondu Udonta. There is no breaking him,” Allura says.

She knows not what she says, Indriza tells herself. Allura, like most of the galaxy but certainly all but a handful of ravagers, sees Yondu as the captain of the Elector, a ruthless pirate that trafficks children, murders without a second glance, and has no respect for the man who saved him from Kree slavery. Indriza knows that he is much more than this stereotype, and that he deserves to be known for who he is and his true actions.

“He is as breakable as any of us,” she replies. “He is a Centaurian, not a Sovereign.”

“He is resilient. If he wasn’t, he wouldn’t continue to pirate the way we do. He will heal and be fixed.”

Indriza is not sure he will. She still hardly knows Yondu, but she knows enough to feel in her core that some part of him belonged to her, and vice versa. Sometimes she dreams of stars under her skin, lighting up whenever he is near, as if the galaxy itself is attempting to tell her that they are right. But that is all folly, she knows. The reality of their situation is that he is a disgrace, she is falling for him, and there is no looking back except with regret.

Such weight terrifies Indriza into extended periods of silence, like now. She is grateful for Allura’s warmth beside her, to remind her that she is alive and real, but most of her focus is on how she has hurt Yondu. By choosing honor, her family, and the Axion II, she has cast him out, perhaps for good. She remembers the pain in his face as he said Peter’s name at their last meeting, and wants nothing more than to punish herself for being so prudish. She knows the Terran child of Ego is not his prisoner, more his ward. She doesn’t blame him for keeping Peter, but it is the reason they cannot be together.

“I can’t stand to see you like this, Indi,” Allura says, rolling over to prop herself on one elbow. Her other hand reaches across Indriza’s tummy, grabs her hand, and laces their fingers together.

Indriza takes in a sharp breath, and upon releasing it, forces a small smile. “I will be fine,” she says, even though she doesn’t believe her words. “Eventually, I will forget him.” She knows that is a blatant lie, but she must say it. She must put him in the back of her mind, put on a brave face, and return to her life with Allura and Omara if she wants to avoid falling into disgrace as well.

Sometimes, though, she wonders if disgrace is worth it. In the late hours of the night, after Allura is snoring, Indriza allows herself to think about living on the Elector with him and Kraglin and Peter. She forgets the crew of rowdy, crude, dangerous ravagers and thinks only of their familial happiness - she and Yondu in love, Peter as their son, Kraglin her brother. They continue to ravage, steal, and pillage, but they are happy, even if the other ravager factions are after them. It can never happen, she knows. She must settle for the Axion II, for reality and structure if she wishes, at all, to keep her family together.

Besides, she knows, Omara will not hesitate to kill her and Yondu if she went to him. Her sister would hunt the Elector down to the ends of the universe if she had to, for revenge and justice. She would never understand Yondu’s motives, Indriza realizes.

 ***

 As the days go on, she thinks of Allura more. To be clear, she forces herself to think of Allura more. Allura’s happiness is key to her focus. She thinks of Yondu more and more infrequently, at least when she can control her mind. While awake, she refuses to fantasize any longer. She steals certain trinkets that remind her of him and the Elector, but she forces herself to look at Allura’s smile as they have their cargo appraised and bought. Anything more will be too painful or too much trouble, she knows.

Her dreams, however, are less controlled and focused. Some nights she talks to Peter in her dreams. He tells her how much he misses his Terran mother, how she was his best and dearest friend before leaving Terra. She tells him about her own family, now gone save for Omara. She even tells him about the brother she doesn’t know, the small babe that very well may still be alive, suffering the same way Yondu had before becoming a ravager. When Peter asks why she doesn’t search for him, she wakes, and is reminded that the conversations aren’t real. More fantasies.

Sometimes she dreams what she had once fantasized: She and Yondu as co-captains, Kraglin and Peter a part of their family. They laugh and have easy conversation, and she is happy and in love. She never wakes from these early.

And yet still, she dreams of what she really wants: Yondu and Allura on both sides of her, the Axion II and Elector crews working together. Omara is happy, she is happy, Yondu and Allura are happy. The universe practically smiles in those dreams, but they never last the whole night in this euphoric state. Sometimes she wakes herself when she comes to the close of happiness, but sometimes she walks into a nightmare of death, destruction, and absolute loneliness.

 ***

 One night, almost two months after Indriza had last seen Yondu, Omara calls her into her chamber. Indriza promises Allura she won’t be long.

When she makes it to Omara’s room, she is relieved to see that D’ithru is absent. Her sister is alone, seated at her comm pad, back straight to the point of almost being stiff. She turns when the door closes behind Indriza.

“Have a seat,” Omara calls.

Indriza does as she’s told; she sits cross-legged on Omara’s bed, then waits.

“So I got an interesting comm today, Indi,” she says, her face expressionless. Her dark hair flows around her as if it levitates - but Indriza knows it’s an illusion. Her own hair, sometimes flat and sometimes wavy, has about half the volume of Omara’s. It always looks as if it is floating because it reaches a wide girth.

“What about?” Indriza asks.

“Yondu Udonta.”

Indriza’s heart skips two beats. Thousands of things run through her head - Omara has found out about Contraxia; Yondu is hurt; Yondu is dead; Peter is dead, and Yondu is hellbent on finding the murderer. More, worse things occur to her, but she doesn’t allow herself to dwell until she hears Omara speak.

“Stakar Ogord has set an actual bounty on his head.”

“What?” Indriza asks. “Why now? It’s been almost a year and a half-”

“I don’t know,” Omara says. “But the bounty is too much to ignore. Stakar wants Yondu for some reason or another. It’s not our place to question his authority, but to comply.”

She shakes her head. “Dead or alive?” Indriza asks.

“From his brief comm, Ogord apparently wants him alive. He’s said nothing of the Terran boy or the rest of the crew, however.”

“We can’t kill a child, Omara,” she says.

“Obviously,” Omara replies. “Ogord knows that. He set the code in place, Indi. He just wants Yondu.”

Again, Indriza shakes her head. She says nothing this time, just feels her throat constrict slowly as she fights for breath.

“If we take him and the child, we can deliver the Terran to Ego,” Omara says. “We can negotiate terms and a price. Ego will deliver, I am sure.”

Indriza’s body wants to go into panic mode, but she knows she can’t. Omara will know everything if she loses control. She bites her lip and takes a deep breath to try to steady herself. It works. Mostly.

“Omara, there is a reason Yondu has kept Peter this long,” she says.

Omara raises an eyebrow. “You know this reason?”

She does, but she can’t say so. After everything, all the mental torment she put herself through in the last two and a half months, Indriza knows her sister will not believe her. She may even go so far as to turn Indriza in to Stakar Ogord as a traitor - but perhaps that would give her the freedom to find Yondu she so desperately wanted.

No, she thinks. This is not the time for that.

“I can’t be sure,” she lies. “I don’t know him well.”

“You know him better than anyone else on this ship,” Omara says in a flat tone.

Indriza sighs. She can either let herself be caught or come close to the truth without giving herself away. She has to be careful to pull the latter off, though. “Yondu has never once shown interest in trafficking children,” she says. “We would’ve known long before he was actually exiled. He is a former slave himself - what gain could he possibly see in selling more children into the same suffering he endured?”

“Units. Millions of units, Indriza.” Again, the flat tone. It made Omara sound angry without having to raise her voice or strain her jaw.

Indriza shook her head. “Former slaves don’t profit off of slavery, Omara. I have never known a slave to become a slave master.”

“You haven’t been paying attention, then.”

She felt her blood get as hot as her palms felt then, but she kept her face as calm as possible. “If he had planned on selling Peter into slavery, why is the child still with him?”

Omara’s eyes widen, but she stays silent.

“Yondu is keeping Peter to protect the child. I think.”

“From what?!” Omara asked, throwing her arms out in a wide question.

Indriza gulped. “Ego.”

“Impossible,” Omara says. “He’s a Celestial. If Peter is his child, he has a right to him!”

“But what if Ego isn’t what he seems?”

“What, like you insisted Yondu is?” Omara asks, crossing her arms over her chest then.

The bite hurts, but only because Indriza knows what Yondu has told her of Ego. She has no way of proving to Omara that Ego is despicable - a Celestial, a being of pure starlight. Still, she goes on.

“It doesn’t matter what I think of Yondu or how my opinion differs from yours. My point is that Yondu has kept Peter Quill, and not just because he’s looking for the highest bidder. Two years is a long time to wait.”

Omara, apparently, lets the theory sink in. She looks away from Indriza, at the floor just beyond the bed, thinking. Hopefully, Indriza has said enough to sew the seeds of doubt without giving too much away. She could only hope as the silence dragged.

After a while - Indriza can’t say how long - Omara finally looks at her again. “There is a chance your theory is right,” she says. “But there is also a chance it is not. And in any case, it is none of our concern-”

“Yes, it is!” Indriza replies. “If we can prove it, we can show Stakar Ogord that-”

“Indriza, it is not our responsibility to prove Yondu’s innocence or guilt. We are loyal to the United, and Stakar leads the United. We must do as he bids.”

“He is not our master,” Indriza says. “We are an alliance, not an army.”

Omara stands. “I wanted to have a conversation with you sister-to-sister,” she says. “But now I see I must have a Captain-to-Crew Member conversation.” She crosses her arms over her chest. “Stakar Ogord has placed a bounty - a generous bounty - on the head of your Centaurian Oath Breaker. We will find him, with or without you. We will bring him in, and we will collect the units. If we capture the child, we will deliver him to the highest bidder - if that happens to be Ego, then so be it. Do you understand?”

Indriza breathes heavy, her blood scorching inside her body. She hopes she doesn’t seem like an insolent child, but decides she doesn’t much care for appearances anymore. “No,” she says, pushing away from the bed. She leaves the room, heading for her own.

Allura is gone, which she is thankful for. Someone is going to be heartbroken tonight, Indriza knows, and for once, it won’t be her. She knows it's a selfish thought, but she continues to find a bag, shove her clothes and weapons into it. She moves quickly, making sure she has everything she could need. Then she locks the door to her room and sits at her comm pad.

The first message she leaves is for Allura.

She sighs. “My dear Allura, I am so sorry. You are the best thing about the Axion II, and I don't deserve your light, your warmth, or your love. I know you will think me a coward for running like this, but I have no choice. I have to save him, Allura. I am the only one who can and will. I want to bring you with me, and hope one day you will find me and join us, but I know right now, the Axion II is your home, and Omara your captain. I can never and will never blame you for that. I will miss you beyond words and look forward to our next meeting. I love you, truly, Allura. I hope you will understand and forgive me...someday. Keep my love safe.”

She sets a time for the comm to send the message, about an hour from now, and then searches the comm for Kraglin. He sent a message to Allura all those months ago, so he had to be in the system. She remembers that Peter had also come through on the comm with an encrypted message, but she hopes beyond hope that Kraglin had been in a hurry when he’d let on to Yondu being on Contraxia.

She searches, scrolling through past communications, going through the last few months until - at last - she finds him. Frantically, Indriza presses on the pad to call, and then she waits. And waits. The signal has sent. They must be far, she thinks, for it to take them this long to answer. Or maybe they don’t recognize the incoming info. She taps her fingers on the pad and jiggles her leg. Any longer, and she’ll have to go on a crazy search through the galaxy, hoping and praying she runs into him at some point - and then, breaking into her thoughts, Kraglin’s face appears.

“Ndriza Ombato?” he asks.

“Kraglin, thank stars.” She sighs, but knows she has only minutes to work. “Where are you?”

“Contraxia,” he says.

She sees the snow on the ground behind him now. Her heart sinks, knowing where he is. Yondu is probably off with a cyborg again, or drowning his sorrows in Xandarian Whiskey. He probably doesn’t want to see her, she thinks. But he has no choice.

“Stay there,” she says.

“Plannin’ on it,” the young ravager says. “Cap’n’s occupied, though.”

She pushes the pain out of her mind for now. She can feel it later, after she apologizes to Yondu. “I’ll be there soon,” she says, ending the comm before he has a chance to question her.

And like that, Indriza grabs the bag from her bed, unlocks her door, and swiftly moves to the loading dock. The Axion II has emergency escape pods that are only accessible by fingerprint, but the instant one is dislodged, the ship goes into lockdown. They are, after all, emergency pods. The pods have trackers in them, imbedded deep into the mechanics of their structure. She can’t remove one without setting off the alarm or entire taking the pod apart. They won’t work.

There is, she thinks, the Captain’s Smallship. She had driven it many times before. Only she and Omara have access to its navigation - or had. She’s not sure she can still get into the ship, let alone pull it away from the dock or take it to Contraxia. She has to try, though. The Smallship won’t set off alarms, or notify Omara of its departure unless she programs it to do so. They had purchased the Smallship from another ravager faction when they’d first joined the United so that they could have a way to depart, for a while, without causing the crew to worry or get in formation. It was once Omara and Indriza’s way to spend time together, away from even Allura and D’ithru.

But now, it was going to be her ride to Yondu. As long as she could still get into it.

She comes up to the dock, finds the Smallship’s pad, and lifts her hand to it. The scanner takes an image of her fingerprints. Her heart beats at a million lightyears an hour. The pad lights up green, allowing her entrance into the ship.

“Indriza,” she hears. She stops in her tracks and turns on her heel.

Omara stands below her, on the bridge of the Axion II. “You’re throwing everything away for him,” her sister calls. “You’re family. Allura. The United. He’s worth millions of units to Stakar Ogord.”

“He’s worth more to me,” she says.

“More than me?” Omara asks. “You protected me my entire life, Indriza. You’re my sister! What is he but a Centaurian ravager who can’t do his job right?”

Indriza walks to the rail of the dock and leans over it. “I love him, Omara.”

“You said yourself you hardly know him!”

She had, and it was the truth, but not the whole truth. “I know a lot more than I let you believe, to protect you.”

“From what?” Omara asks.

“Me,” Indriza responds, turning back to the Smallship.

“If you get on that ship, we’re done. Forever. You’ll no longer be allowed on my ship. You won’t even be a ravager anymore,” Omara says.

Better than threatening to kill me, Indriza thinks. She steps into the ship and raises a hand to shut the door, but Omara calls out again:

“You’re no sister of mine, Oath Breaker.”

The pain she feels then is akin to someone taking her heart and shattering a fourth of it. The most important fourth. The fourth that worked the hardest to sustain her for the last twenty-seven years. Indriza closes her eyes as a tear rolls down her face. She holds her head high, partially to keep the tear from falling onto her shirt and partially to show Omara that she is indifferent - which, for the record, she is not. Without a look back at her younger sister - the baby she carried off of Axion, the young girl she taught to hold a knife, her partner when their mother died, her co-captain up until a few months ago - Indriza shuts the door and heads for the navigation unit.

Tears fall freely as she directs the Smallship to Contraxia. She doesn’t care that she’s crying and showing emotion, but that she is doing what she dreaded the thought of only a few days before. She has chosen which side she is on, and now must take responsibility of that choice.

Stakar Ogord will denounce her. He will formally exile her once he receives word of her treachery, which is only treachery according to his word in the first place. If he knew the whole story, why Yondu had taken Peter and why he still had the Terran child, he would lift the bounty off of Yondu and make it so that this mission would not be life-shattering. But it’s not, she reminds herself. It is and it isn’t. Her past life - the life she had with Omara, her Axion life, is over. Her life as an exiled ravager with Yondu and the crew of the Elector has just begun, so long as he takes her. She wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t, given their last meeting.

But if he doesn’t, she is alone. Maybe she’ll seek out Stakar Ogord herself, beg of him a place in his ranks, and stay there quietly until everything blows over.

#yondu udonta #yondu fanfic #yondu x oc #cross the stars