#thats where i'd crumble personally

[nevarroes]

Can I survive gortash's diet for one day

like those youtube challenges?😫 With a person that forces u to finish as well? idk brother.... stomach pain from hell probably but at least it's mostly rich people food so enjoy🙏

#blakemail #lets not mention the #probably 2 meals worth of just desserts nd sweets for no reason at all #thats where i'd crumble personally

[matthewkniesys]

it was supposed to be a secret but we suck at secret keeping - jack hughes social media au

a/n: an anon requested a jack ig edit where you're cole caufield's little sister and you and jack start dating when you're at the beach house but you keep it a secret. eventually the boys realising you're spending so much time with jack that they start making joke instagram posts that you two are dating but little do they know they're right. so here it is :)

sorry for not having a cut but my pictures wouldn't load properly if i did

pairing: jack hughes x fem!reader

warnings: none i dont think

trevorzegras

Liked by @/ colecaufield, alexturcotte, jamie.drysdale and 80 569 others

trevorzegras - my best friends sister looking extra cozy with my other best friend

Tagged: @/ jackhughes & y/ncaufield

View Top Comments

colecaufield - not funny trev thats my little sister

↳ trevorzegras - i think its very funny

↳ colecaufield - i'll chop your dick off for posting this and if this ever becomes true i'll chop jack's dick off too

↳ trevorzegras - i'm very very sorry it's just a joke please don't chop off my dick

y/ncaufield - well isn't this just hilarious...

↳ jackhughes - its so funny...

↳ y/ncaufield - no it really is and no one understands

↳ trevorzegras - im glad some people enjoy my sense of humor *cough* cole *cough*

↳ colecaufield - im coming to find you right now trevor and i have some scissors

↳ trevorzegras - okay okay im actually very sorry please don't hurt me

alexturcotte

Liked by @/ trevorzegras, jackhughes, y/ncaufield and 65 937 others

alexturcotte - more pictures of y/n and jack...(please don't hurt me cole)

Tagged: @/ y/ncaufield & jackhughes

View Top Comments

colecaufield - this was a bad desicion on your part alex

↳ alexturcotte - oh shit, currently trying to find where trev is hiding from you so i can hide too

y/ncaufield - i looked so hot in that brown bikini and i was just trying to get a nice picture but jack had jump in too... so very rude of him

↳ jackhughes - i stole the show as always

↳ y/ncaufield - yeah you did you little thief

↳ jackhughes - and im the greatest thief ever i mean come on just look at me in that picture...and if we're being honest alex should've just cropped you right out and left just me

↳ y/ncaufield - you are the most insufferable person in the world and my brother is cole caufield so that saying a lot

↳ jackhughes - its okay for you to say that i know you could never really understand my true beauty

_quinnhughes - they're cute

↳ colecaufield - quinn... not you too

lhughes_06

Liked by @/ nicohischier, _quinnhughes, colecaufield and 78 325 others

lhughes_06 - had to add my own pictures since we're doing this

Tagging: @/ jackhughes & y/ncaufield

View Top Comments

colecaufield - i like you luke so i'll let this slide just this once since i know its a joke

↳ trevorzegras - are you saying that you like him more than me and alex??

↳ colecaufield - yes

↳ alexturcotte - jack im so offended

y/ncaufield - if i'd have known how bad at cooking jack was i never would've let him near the stove

↳ jackhughes - don't be a drama queen im not that bad at cooking

↳ y/ncaufield - i mean sure if you like it when the crust of your pizza is so charred that it's fully black and it crumbles into tiny pieces the second you pick it up

trevorzegras - look at me i'm a trend setter

↳ lhughes_06 - you could say that

jackhughes

Liked by @/ trevorzegras, lhughes_06, y/ncaufield and 145 908 others

jackhughes - didn't really have many pictures of me and y/n (that i could post) so just enjoy my appreciation post for her

Tagged: @/ y/ncaufield

View Top Comments

yourbestfriend - hottest caufield sibling not gonna lie

↳ jackhughes - i know right??

↳ y/ncaufield - ...

↳ colecaufield - firstly wrong but secondly JACK WHAT

trevorzegras - y/n > cole

↳ alexturcotte - y/n > cole

↳ colecaufield - cole > y/n

↳ jackhughes - nope the right answer is y/n > cole

colecaufield - jach hughes what the hell do you mean by pictures that you can post... what kind of pictures of my sister do you have??

↳ jackhughes - well um you know

↳ colecaufield - no i really don't please share

↳ jackhughes - i'm just gonna not answer this okay

↳ colecaufield - no actually not okay

y/ncaufield - in my lake house summer era and i love it

y/ncaufield

Liked by @/ jackhughes, colecaufield, trevorzegras and 193 857 others

y/ncaufield - and you all thought it was a joke this whole time (cole please don't come for jack)

Tagged: @/ jackhughes

View Top Comments

jackhughes - my one and only my life line

↳ y/ncaufield - can i go where you go, can we always be this close

↳ jackhughes - forever & always

colecaufield - oh hell no

↳ y/ncaufield - you know i love the brothers best friend trope

↳ colecaufield - didn't know you loved it this much

↳ y/ncaufield - what can i say i guess i do

trevorzegras - I KNEW MY SPIDEY 'S SENSE WERE RIGHT

↳ y/ncaufield - congrats buddy

colecaufield - wait...who took all those pictures for you

↳ y/ncaufield - quinn :)

↳ colecaufield - why the fuck did quinn know before me also it suddenly makes so much sense why you and quinn and jack were going on so many boat rides together

↳ y/ncaufield - he caught me sneaking out of jack's room one morning so he's know for a while

↳ colecaufield - WHY WERE YOU IN JACK'S ROOM OH NO ME AND JACK ARE AT WAR

↳ y/ncaufield - i will always be yours if we survive the great war

↳ jackhughes - your brother is scary i'm not sure i will

thanks for reading🫶requests are always open for fics, blurbs, ig edits and just thoughts!!

taglist: @woodruff-edwards @nicohischierz @makarhughes @cobrakaisb @huggy-hischier94 @boldysswld@cole-mcward48@kashee-h@kjohnson-91 @jackhues @corneliaskates @imma-mirrorball @hvghes @emptyflowerpots @h0e4fictionalme-n

join my taglist

#jack hughes #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes imagine #nhl imagine #fake ig edit #social media au #hockey #nhl #x reader #trevor zegras #cole caufield #alex turcotte #luke hughes #quinn hughes #claire tries writing <3

[definitelynotshouting]

OMG I TOTALLY FORGOT IT WAS CHRISTMAS I WAS SO TIRED LMAO MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

I actually had the BEST luck on the plane- no babies and NOBODY WAS COUGHING. I still wore a mask but that was the first time I've ever been able to sleep on a plane it was revolutionary. Never had a plane so quiet.

LOL Queen Jellie :3 She's exactly like my cat: spoiled and damn pleased about it. It's okay though because she's cute.

Also the "it's Scar's point, now,". Desert duo try and communicate normally challenge. These two CANNOT hold a conversation without trying to one-up each other or committing to some bit and thats why we love them <3 silly (affectionately)❤️

YOURE A CHEESE PERSON AS WELL?!?? Red dragon is SO good, excellent choice. The espresso one sounds interesting! I've never had coffee flavoured cheese-- im fond of one and not the other-- but if you you recommend it i might have to give it a go :o. My own favourites arent anything exciting; i just like a good gouda or smoked cheddar (i love smoked cheeses)

Anyway, ty for indulging my airport boredom haha :D. Im back home in Malaysia (where i grew up) for a couple of weeks before going back to Australia. Thoroughly ready to gorge myself on malaysian food and fruits AND ENJOY CONSISTENT WEATHER BECAUSE MELBOURNE CAN AND HAS HAILED!! AT 24+ DEGREES CELSIUS (75 F)!!!! NOT OKAY HADKDBSJSJ

-☀️

HI SUN ANON I HOPE MALAYSIA IS TREATING U WELL!!!!!! I was gonna respond sooner but holidays went and knocked me on my ass dkdbdjdnf. Also WIN THE TRAVEL BLESSING WORKED /SILLY 😌😌😌😌😌 glad u had a good flight king 🫡🫡🫡

I am indeed a cheese person!!!! Huge cheese fan, also i think you're the first person ive ever spoken to who has any idea what Red Dragon is right off the bat 😂😂😂😂😂 but yeah i love cheese so fucking much-- for xmas we had the aforementioned espresso, as well as several other bellavitano cheeses including a merlot, a bourbon, and garlic and herb. Plus a very nice and very soft, crumbly bleu. It wasnt Stilton, which is my personal fave, but it honestly held up really well when i made my traditional christmas snacks (petite toasts with bleu cheese, blackberry jam, and a walnut on top :] )

And yeah scarian truly cant communicate without making it a competition and its KILLING MEEEEEE DDJEHFKNFDKFNN im so obsessed with them and their dynamic, im glad you liked that moment!!! I was planning to post the fic the day after xmas but alas the holiday stress/burnout got to me before i could 😭😭😭 SOON THO!!!! Mayhaps even for the new year, we shall see!!!!

Hope ur having fun, sun anon!!! :D i'd love to hear more about the food ur having over there (also ur SO valid for the consistent weather comment, i grew up in Texas which can sometimes have crazy weather patterns so o7 about the hail in 75°F weather 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭) thanks for dropping by!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️

#shouting speaks #asks #my cat also had to go to the vet right before xmas 😔😔😔😔😔 so i was really anxious for him #hes alright!!! just had a very mild uti 😭😭😭😭😭 i jyst happen to be the world's most anxious cat mother in existence #so between that and the holidays and then scrambling to finish this secret santa ive been SAUR BUSY....... #schedule isnt clearing up anytime soon either bc of the zine #BUT WE STAY SILLY o7 #txt

[infinityroom]

[here's that summary of so far i promised !!

ok so: grian and impulse got stuck in the infinity room that grian made for impulse as his season 9 secret fools prank. we interacted with them for a bit, they tested a bunch of different things before they marked their starting spot with an x with the red dye grian had and started moving. (he also has blue dye and a stack of bread. impulse has nothing.) we see the first glimpse of a mysterious endermite person touching the red x after that.

they travel for a while before discovering that mumbo is here and we can /msg interact with him. the area around his text (no face icon, mc chat text) was glitchy and sometimes there was galactic around them, which we later found out were his thoughts.

a few other things we learned: if mumbo is displeased, angry or any other negative emotions he gets glitchier. he doesn't like being asked about the grian that came with him here. also mumbo mentioned "she" a couple of times. don't think we know who that is yet ?

mumbo proceeds to ring a bell to get impulse and grian to get to him, and although they are suspicious at first, upon finding out that this mumbo is from season 6, they immediately go. on the way we learn that grian and impulse have started to glitch slightly, though (thankfully) very rarely (for now). we also get our first old echo file, which contains different audio clips from hermits with some endermite noises mixed in. (there's another one with the same format, though they contain very different messages. i suggest listening👍👍 couldn't link them though sorry)

right after they reach mumbos little hut, we see the mysterious endermite person again, who is revealed to be tango. he speaks either partially in galactic or fully so and doesn't like noise (the asks). more about him soon.

we see mumbo !! he's glitchy and kinda crumbling/falling apart. he looks like a pathetic wet cat (not in a bad way). he's not okay. but we get more revelations !! the void corrupts over time, but having less items speeds up the process. grian gives half a stack of bread to impulse to hopefully help. mumbo also doesn't like noise. (glitches more) he glitches way less when experiencing positive emotions :D

then we cut back to tango, who really isn't happy about all the noise (asks) and after listening to an echo traveling through the room, he sends us to another grian. this grian is the season 9 grian who was making the prank room for impulse and then got stuck. we dropped some real bombs on him, and thats where we're at now.

uh. sorry that got so long, i got carried away... it has the big plot points with some info mixed in :) hope it proves atleast some use :DD

also i'd be happy to write another one if ya need again. this was done kinda quick tbh so it isn't very polished... but i could do a better one when im not half asleep if ya need :D]

[We got DOUBLE summaries!! hell yeah!! i honestly love reading them! Thank you so much <3]

#author ask

[zarinthel]

dvd ask meme; nobody is asking about impel downer so clearly i have to. i think i’ve read this fic in it’s entirely three times so i’d wanna interrogate you about every chapter, but I’ll pick ch8 times up. there’s a lot i like in here, sybil and akainu’s “fight”, sybil’s last prophecy to akainu as they think they’re about to die (is it a prophecy, a threat, a hope, or. last fuck you, all of the above), canonizing oars death in a heartbreaking way that fits into your plot, more hints at sybil’s backstory (which i’m always dying over will we learn more) in her conversation with shanks and the doctor and their awkard silence reaction to just casual mention of how excessively fucked over sybil has been by the world government

ch8 of impel downer, Time's Up! what a throwback. i loved writing this chapter. now let's see what i remember of something i wrote (checks date) over two years ago lol.

one of my favorite things of shifting between povs in this chapter is that nobody is happy. not garp, not shanks, nobody. not a single person in this war except for blackbeard gained more than they lost.

shanks negotiations. the thing is, he doesn't want to fight. he's not actually interested in swinging the balance of the world any further, but he's also not willing to back down-- he wont let them have whitebeard's body. he won't abandon sybil to marine custody just because it would be "easier".

garp is actually helping him with the offer. but who knows if he'd actually go along with it if sybil hadnt broken their time clock while the arguement was still ongoing.

sybil and akainu. sybil has the strength of a properly made paramecia-- if you make the right circumstances, they can hit way above their level. but there's no way for them to actually hurt him, lol. sybil doesn't really have offensive skills. well, they could probably develop them, but they don't have them. so its a cat and mouse game where the most important things are this

they want to live

akainu wants them to die; its unthinkable to let someone ruin a marine admirals rep like that and live. the problem isn't that they didn't get clobbered but that they did in a way that made him look really bad and ineffective. Lol

"Everything..." They mumble, giving up on running as they focus all their energy into the venom of their voice. "Everything you build. It's gonna crumble. The seas will bleed red with the blood of your enemies, and it will be for nothing. The seas will part, the sky will fall, the---"

the prophesy/curse/fuck you.

sybil's got a lot of stuff their unsure of. a lot of memory problems. inconsistent recall. so maybe they don't know for sure, /memory wise/, that that will happen. but because they believe that they live in a world where Monkey D Luffy will become Pirate King, it's a prophecy. they say it and they believe it.

Oars Jr.

you know, i write a lot of tragedies, but i don't actually write a lot of death scenes. im the type of person who kills people off screen and then writes reactions. so, this one...

i hate when i kill off a character and its less impactful than the original canon. so i thought, this has to be at least as sad as when Oars died in marineford, and that scene was AWFUL.

but i was genuinely sad, you know. i saw the pieces come together, realized how sybil was going to get out, and i, the author, had to realize that oars wasn't going to live. even though i'd half thought he might. thats what happens when you put the puzzle together and then realize what it shows.

you can't save someone like ace and not lose /anything/. and not lose almost everything. you just have to think its worth it.

so, sybil's backstory. this is the first time they even lay most of it out-- we've met them at the start of their adventures in the grand line, but theyve been having a rough decade or so

a watchmaker in west blue, a bad, unlucky run in with a celestial dragon, a failure to pay the Heavenly Tribute dominoed off the original bad run in, a stay in Impel Down dominoed off that. and then, the part they've failed to explain after that of how a civilian who should have been floor 1 had ended up at floor 5.5. the circumstances around their devil fruit. a lot of stuff..

how can a seer not have contempt for the heavens?

how can a prisoner not despise their chains?

and despite all that, they saved ace not for grandiose reasons, but for personal ones. do you think your death would improve the world? Even if the answer is yes, it's fine if you still live!

oh, and then the bounty. that was fun. you know, i actually picked 99 million BEFORE i realized that was the same number as th rest of doflamingo's subordinates. lmao

#meta

[verminviscount]

ive been made aware that i have strong opinions on my personal ranking of percy jackson characters so im making a post about it. bc thats what we do here on tungle.hell. experiencing brain worms? spread the word. @garecc i invite you to include your own brain worms here

for those who may not know, which i expect is most of my followers here, Travis (garecc) and i go way back to the days of a trials of apollo discord server that has since crumbled under the weight of various discourse and does not exist at this time. so if anyone understands pjo brain rot, its him.

ONTO THE RANKING. ill be focusing on main characters bc if i include side characters we'll be here all day and Sally Jackson would be every character in this top 5.

1. Hazel Levesque. Deserves better in the eyes of fandom. Gained pretty good control over the mist within one book. Has a cool magic horse. Similar tragic backstory to Nico, but not sulking about it. No shame in sulking, but its cool to see someone go through bad shit and come out still feeling mostly okay.

2. Will Solace. Unfortunately for me, I haven't finished the trials of apollo series yet, so i dont know THAT much about Will as he's primarily a background character. But Apollo kids and medics both get my utmost respect and appreciation, always. and he's a little bit of a sarcastic little shit, but the kind where people dont get annoyed with you bc its almost always funny and lighthearted. i know from hearing people talk about tsats that he's also a Sad Boy (which is to be expected as a demigod, tragedy physically cannot leave you alone.), and im excited to read about someone with my personality go through a mental breakdown :D!

3. Frank Zhang. Listen to me. How can he not be this high up. I don't even know where to begin with this guy, he's so gods damned cool. He's just such a good character and a good dude too! I'd love to be his friend. What a sweetheart, iirc he was the only person at camp jupiter who wasnt freaked out by Nico? he's so nice. children of Ares/Mars are usually mean, and he's so nice. i love him so much. also his life force is connected to a chunk of wood, which is kinda neat. he's a legacy of poseidon. he's canadian. im pretty sure his first name is Westernized bc his grandma calls him Fai, my last name was westernized when my great grandparents came over so i sort of get it though not nearly to the same degree. I ALMOST FORGOT HE CAN SHAPESHIFT!!! DUDE what a cool guy. we gotta move on, i gotta cut myself off. give him more attention in your fan works

4. Nico di Angelo. obviously a fan favorite, but im talking canon Nico here. im not talking about an uwu soft emo boi. im talkin about a sarcastic, pessimistic, deeply insecure little dude. listen, im not gonna talk about the things i love about nico because its been said a million times. its nothing new. im just gonna say that i love reading about characters that go through awful awful trauma and still overcome and find joy on the other side.

5. Rachel Elizabeth Dare. so my impulse is to put Leo here bc i adored him when i first read HoO. and if i didnt really think about it, i wouldve put him. but... Rachel!! how can you not love her! a mortal lady who can see through the mist, she fought with a hairbrush, she's the liveliest and loveliest oracle of delphi camp halfblood has ever and will ever know, she’s from money and hates it, she's an activist, an artist, way more helpful than the last oracle for sure. the mummy in the attic just left you to fend for yourself, Rachel will at least try to help you interpret what a prophecy means. she's blunt and talks a mile a minute, i love seeing my "flaws" represented positively in media.

honorable mentions: Leo Valdez of course, easily my number 6 spot. Apollo/Lester, we love seeing immense character development. Grover Underwood, probably the first time i ever had a definitive favorite character. Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase, romance would be dead and we wouldnt have a series without them.

#percy jackson #pjo hoo toa #character ranking

[a-simple-imagine]

Hey, so I might need to reword this again to make a proper request unless you think this is okay, but could I request for Anne where one day she has a nightmare where she relives her execution, (and maybe sees yn in the crowd but shes cheering the executioner) so she starts experiencing phantom pains around her neck (I'd like think her and Katherine have a scar around their neck from that.) And feeling the scar throbbing and constantly either losing her breath or having trouble swallowing.

The girls def notice how different Anne is acting and are worried for her as she's never been like this before. I don't know how yn comes maybe its her day off work, and she wants to spend time with Anne, but she isn't responding to her texts or calls, or Katherine calls her to come over.

Throughout the day, Anne keeps seeing glimpses of things. For example, when she's walking backstage, she feels claustrophobic as she imagines the walls as the path she took when she was executed. When she's getting ready, she looks at the mirror and sees blood pooling down her neck and her eyes dead . Or someone she thought looked like Henry. And she's so out of it when she has to do reherseals she can't get the words out of her mouth. And maybe yn is there to watch, so when she sees how she acts, she's scared as well, never seeing Anne like this before either. So maybe they had to use the stand-in. And yn takes Anne back to her place or yns place (to which she's shy about as she's never invited her, and it's a bit of a mess, but Anne is out of it and doesn't notice.)

But maybe what really makes her tell yn is when she has another nightmare but instead of her being executed she's forced to watch from the audience as yn gets executed, and maybe even seeing Henry there and telling her she's the reason for this. Oh goddd imagine when yn does get executed, her blood lands on Anne and she can feel it/taste it and sees it on her hands, and conveniently theres a puddle or something so she can see the blood on her face. so when she wakes up she's so traumatised. Maybe yn got up and wanted Anne to rest a bit longer so was making breakfast, but when she hears the screams she drops the tray on the floor and rushes to Anne to see if she's okay but as soon as Anne has sights on yn she crumbles and latches onto yns neck, checking she's alright and she doesn't have a scar. And yn having to use the tricks Anne does for her when yn has anxiety problems to help calm Anne down.

I'm not sure what else to say, but maybe Anne shows yn the scar as she probably has it covered but trusts yn, and when she feels yn touch it, it's soothing. Of course they have a huge discussion about it all and anne ends up staying for like a week and yn is happy when Anne starts acting like herself again, but knowing Anne trusts her with a very personal issue she has. The girls probably work it out in the end, and Katherine probs visit to bring some of Anne's items and talk them as she, of course, gets it. (Bonus, can yn have a ginger cat if she does take Anne to her place, I can imagine the cat being super sweet with Anne ;_; and once she's feeling better yn sees her dancing with the cat one morning)

So, I'd be happy to actually to pay this as a comission as i feel like this is very detailed and won't be a small request. :D and I've always wanted to request from you.

Also could this be that yn is an introvert so the introvert/extrovert dynamic is what they have, so seeing Anne so different is def a shock to yn.

OH OHHH yn def has a little section she's dedicated for Anne, whether thats items Anne has bought yn or pictures of them together or of just Anne, and I don't know if you've seen it there's a pin badge of her dress as merchandise, so she def has that as well. She doesn't notice at first but def starts coming out of her shell when she finally notices and teases yn over it while at the same time falling more in love with yn.

I really hope this makes sense, please take your time in replying but I'd love to see what you think and what you'd add :)

hey there, thank you for the request!! i think this is the most detailed request i have ever received and i very much appreciate it.

now, my only worry would be being able to do it justice?? i’m not sure i’m gonna be able to live up to expectations… i have a habit of taking creative liberties. are you dead set on every single detail being in it?? is there anything you’d like to definitely be included?? i’m also slow so it might take a while (case in point; my katherine howard story taking like 4 months) i love the fanon idea of anne and katherine having scars on their necks. it’s one of my favourites. another question would be whose point of view would you want this to be from?? i usually stick to one so, y/n or anne’s?? it’d work better from anne’s but that may depersonalise the story a little bit since y/n no longer becomes the main character.

(also i have seen the pins. i own the katherine howard and anne boleyn dress pins as well as one that says the ‘the 10 amongst theses 3’s’)

#answered #xxxtwilightaxelxxx #take me back to december when i got to see six like everyday #request

[highonthought]

Single gorl

So danny broke up with me today, officially. He called me as I was on my way to an interview. I answered and let hime know that I couldn't talk just yet bc i was busy. So, I went to my interview, did awesome, got along well with hr. And I called danny after. Part of me was hoping that he would be apologetic, and sorry for his confuison, and for hurting me in the midst of his confusion. But, no. There was no confusion. He spoke with a meek certainty. "I dont think im in a place were i can be in a relationship" , "I think, I just want to be single right now."

I am split. I cried in waves today. Rolling waves, some small, some big where my boogers are running down my face, and i can taste the salt no matter how often i wipe my face. Im split between believing him at face value, that he doesnt feel any romantic feelings towards me, that i became just a chore to him. Im split between that and beleiveing that he broke up with me to not have to deal with a relationship in case he is deployed. The world is, crumbling. I hope for freedom to prevail. This scenario allows for him to be a martyr in his desicion to leave me. So that if he goes, really goes, I dont die from grief. I dont spend the rest of my life mourning him. Well, We mingled for almost two years. I'd say that gives me, mmm 24 weeks to sit in heartbreak. Thats 6 months. I love him still, even now. Maybe if I knew his real reasons. Maybe if he cheated. Maybe if he told me how unattractive to him i was. Maybe if he said i was gross to him. Maybe if he said he didn't like my traits, my mannerisms. Actually, I do have "I don't know if i love you anymore". Danny doesn't do anything irrationally. Thats one of the things i loved about him, he had such sense. Knowing this, I know he did not lie, no matter how desperately i'm hoping he did.

He was the only person to message me through ig. Now, every notification i glance at my screen with a small tug in my heart praying that its him, coming to his senses. I still cant believe it. He left me. Danny left me. It was supposed to be us. High school sweethearts, who found each other again. We were different, i thought that made us stronger, it was cute. I guess I'm the romantic. I have my career. I have my family. And ill always have the memories of us when He did love me. The man i miss and long for now, doesn't exist. I think he faded away long before danny actually wants to admit to me. But, ill choose to beleive it was after our one year anniversary, because the letter he wrote me was too beautiful to be fake. Thats what i want to beleive. Im gladd he was my first boyfriend. Because when there was love, the love was true, and innocent, and kind, and tender, and young. We will always be young in our love, in mine. I kept the pictures. When I am old, and sick, I know i will be happy to look at myself, young 20s, being happy. Because in all my memories and pictures with him, I am happy. Except today. But like i said, today he was not the daniel i once loved. The man I loved could not bear to make me cry and ache like this.

[honeyrisuke]

there is a distinct way in which amab people are taught flirting and romance works that absolutely irks me and it literally gets boiled down to "literally dont give a shit about what the other person says and keep going no matter what"

like, whenever I'm talking with an afab person in a date-y way and and I tell them I don't think we work out bc we are fundamentally different, they go "ok yeah i get that". like, when they say they go out drinking three times a week. I'd just die and crumble. and usually this is also so early on that they aren't even upset, its good we talked and then it's over.

any cis man and amab nonbinary person that has flirted with me so far has COMPLETELY IGNORED these things, down to fully ignoring things like "I don't want to go on a date with you" or "I don't think we click at all".

they will either joke about it and then continue or just refuse to react to it entirely. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

I just had another person tell me they're sex repulsed and asexual and go on and on about how they just need romantic love and if i rly needed physical touch they'd be ok with me going somewhere else for it-

so I went "oh, thats unfortunate bc I'm aromantic. I can't do romantic love."

and they went "aww we're gonna work it out :3"

no bitch we are NOT. there is literally no fucking touchpoint for us to have a relationship. We can be friends but that's it. I'm not gonna get myself roped into a situation where i'm forced to pretend I even remotely understand romance because you gotta have your fucking way

#and dont you dare read trans-misogyny into this shit #i know theres amab people out there who dont do this but unfortunately theyre not the kinda amab people who like me #the only ones i get are chasers and people who i need to YELL AT to get my 'no' across #and its the same fucking behaviour every damn time and im SICK and TIRED. #and this doesnt even touch on the fact yet that im not into men #rant #life

[prof-peach]

Have you ever had to deal with a pokemon that's actively hostile to humans? Stuff like the Black Tyranitar or the Black Fog, not just a regular mon with a violent personality.

We still talk about Black Tyranitar, thats stuff of nightmares. As much as i hate the idea of any pokemon being stuck in a ball, that one's proven to be notoriously destructive, the dangers it poses to others outweigh the pros of freeing it in any sense. At least until a suitable fix for its aggression is found. I was so young when the destruction of it all but demolished Cianwood City, they've since rebuilt the area, though some locations were left as crumbled monuments, to recall those who perished and fought to stop the Tyranitar.

As for Black fog, it was found to be a very old, very powerful Haunter, but it was before my time, i'd not know a lot first hand. It's said it was treated and revered like a god, and became angry when humans stopped giving it the attention and time they once did, it had become accustomed to a certain lifestyle. The statue it once was sealed in still lies under a great mound of grass out in the pains where it fell, patches of it still visible even today. An interesting thing to stumble across in ones travels. Apparently the rock statue is always cold, no matter the weather.

We get the odd pokemon here at the Island who's actively aiming for people, not even the pokemon they're battling, they bypass them entirely and go straight for the trainer. Nothing nearly as terrifying as the old legends of that Tyranitar or Haunter though. Those creatures are things of legend, stuff we don't really deal with.

Violent pokemon are one thing, whatever those were, totally different. I don't think i'd class anything we've handled in the same category. Plenty of very old mons who were powerful, and many individuals with a lot of bad energy, even pokemon who've killed humans, many in fact, but still, not legends. Here's hoping we don't have to either. I'm all for a challenge, but fighting something like those? Thats no challenge, thats a death wish.

#we have plenty of poekemon who hate people #but thats a whole other level #prof.peach #pokemon

[silverinia]

What do you think Kurt and Diane 's signs are ?? I think Kurt is Capricorn :D but i don't know what diane is she is not a water element thats what i know :D

Oh. Oh.

I’m. So. Glad. You. Asked.

I literally cracked my knuckles before I started typing out my answer because now Diane and Kurt haven't sat at the top of my phone notes page titled "comfort characters - zodiac signs" for over a year for nothing. I'll give you what I think their big three (sun, moon and rising sign) are, explain a little about why I've chosen each of them, and finish each section with a bit of compatibility talk to round up this rant outburst shitshow thesis. (You know what, yes, I'm calling it a thesis. The amount of astrology kitchen sink psychology knowledge I have is ridiculous and will be put to... well, a use of some sort. Buckle up and enjoy!)

First up, a small disclaimer/spoiler: I don't think Kurt is a Capricorn at all. I've seen a couple of people talking about his alleged Capricorn vibes on my twitter timeline before and I cannot see it for the life of me. Capricorns are stern and ambitious, organised, striving for authority and often materialistic (they’re basically the human form of the “it’s about drive, it’s about power” song). While Kurt is hard-working, he never comes off like a workaholic, and he’s very laid back, rather spontaneous and chaotic than anal and organised. Professional success doesn’t seem to be the leading drive in his life - on the contrary: he often sacrifices it for his beliefs and the loyalty he craves to be a defining part of himself. Sorry anon, sorry Twitter fam, feel free to comment on this post and try to lay out to me why you would ever view Kurt as a Capricorn, because I'd actually love to hear an explanation for it.

I’d also like to note that we each have our own interpretation of these characters, and that’s exactly the way it’s supposed to be. The Good Wife/Fight is not a sitcom, it never reduces the characters’ stories to what little it depicts on-screen. Especially with Kurt, the show leaves plenty of room for interpretation. But this is my answer (btw, I’m sorry, anon, I’m sure you didn’t know what you were getting yourself into) and while this post may not make anyone’s day but mine, it’s really, really making my day so much because yes, astrology may be scientifically incorrect bs, but it’s fun scientifically incorrect bs.

So, without further ado...

Sun signs:

Sun signs explained: ego, identity, role in life, centre of your personality, what motivates and drives you, who you are learning to become

Diane: Sagittarius

Sun in Sagittarius explained: idealists; crave freedom and self-improvement, do what they believe in; aspirational, generous, impatient; travel, philosophy, longing to understand the world; existential crisis in human form

Sagittarius is all about freedom, an everlasting longing for more and avoiding things that might constrict them. Sagittariuses are most likely to be interested in travelling and philosophy, but not just for the sake of collecting experiences and engaging in pretentious conversations at social gatherings, but because they feel like their experiences and the various impressions they want to collect are a part of who they are or what they long to be, almost like they owe it to the world to try and discover as much of it as they possibly can in the time they have, and in return, to themselves to become the best possible version of themselves.

Diane is very inquisitive. Her attempts to figure out the world, to try and solve it like a puzzle, and to find out where she stands in it are a huge part of her character and her struggles. She works in an environment that doesn’t seem to fit with her idealism, almost like she’s daring her belief system to cave and crumble and make room for her personal growth. She surrounds herself with people who are vastly different from herself, driven by emotions and impulse and often times even chaos (see Will, Marissa, and of course Kurt), and for someone who really seems to define herself through her views, beliefs and idealism, she keeps challenging those constructs by confronting herself with realities and opinions that don’t seem to fit into the idea of the world she has.

Diane is aspirational. She has lots of goals in her life that keep her driven, but that are also so vastly different from each other that they would interfere with each other if they were fulfilled. We’ve seen her wish to be judge, her wish to retire in Europe, her wish to be a good lawyer, to be powerful enough to make a change in the world, her long-buried wish to be a mother. The variety of her dreams and the various lives she can imagine herself living cause her to keep reflecting herself and in turn keep her from losing herself in stagnation.

Diane’s longing for freedom and her dislike for things she thinks would sacrifice her freedom determine the possibly life-changing choices she makes, like pushing away close relationships, may they be romantic or platonic, not taking leaps, and second-guessing her trust in others. She's an idealist and often crushed by her disappointment in the world, because feeling like she is still in control of her understanding is a huge part of not only her intellect, but also of her identity. Her view of the world and the role she plays in it are the core of how she defines herself. I just think Sagittarius makes a silly amount of sense for her.

Kurt: Taurus

Sun in Taurus explained: loyal, calm, affectionate, practical, productive, stubborn, rigid, homebody, all or nothing attitude; embodiment of stability, sort of like a hardwood table personified; guided by practical knowledge and experiences; like sweatpants, food and peace and quiet

This, like pretty much all the placements I picked for Kurt, is one of the ones I expect to be the most controversial, but it just makes so much sense to me.

Taurus is practical and relies on logic, which grounds and calms them by basically tying a string to them that connects them with the physical world which kindly gives them a frame for their pursuit of stability. They can be materialistic but are often very minimalistic at the same time, able to feel comfortable with little as long as what they have gives them a sense of routine and consistency. They are great listeners and very dependable, but they also tend to be stubborn and set in their ways.

Kurt 👏🏼 is 👏🏼 such 👏🏼 a 👏🏼 Taurus 👏🏼. At the start of the show, the writers basically write out for us that he’s the most loyal person on earth. And even when that seems to change, it happens in a setting in which there’s basically no routine in his life due to Diane’s unreliability (not blaming Diane for being cheated on but this is a simple fact), almost like he loses himself as he loses what gives him his sense of security in this world (I really didn’t want to talk about the cheating storyline, but it’s fitting so nicely into the Kurt-is-a-Taurus-theory that I almost feel inclined to forgive Robert and Michelle on the spot. Almost.).

Kurt is the definition of practical. He finds out Diane is being threatened by an anonymous source, grabs a saw and a handful of wires he had lying around and builds a working security system for their front door (I mean what the actual fuck). He’s calm, like the rock in the raging waters that is Diane (this woman is a human tornado). He’s very all or nothing, up to the point where somehow every single question he asks Diane can only be answered with either “Let’s elope, flee the country and sip Piña Coladas and go skinny dipping together until we die” or “I’ll delete your contact info, forget we ever met each other and avoid ever talking to you again”. He invented being low maintenance; before he moves in with Diane, he has exactly two jackets, a pair of jeans and shoes, a sports coat, two flannel shirts, the suit he got married in, and a single hideous belt. And he has foodie vibes. I can’t explain that point, but he just does. What more could you expect from a Taurus?

(Honestly, somebody please explain the Capricorn theory to me, because I genuinely tried to see it, but all I see is a couch potato with a bowl of pasta in their lap, defined by their goodness and loyalty.)

Compatibility: Sagittarius sun x Taurus sun

If you look it up online, Sagittarius and Taurus supposedly have about the compatibility of lesbian English majors and their male Math teachers from school (haters gonna hate). But if you think about it, that actually makes a certain kind of sense. Because McHart literally makes no sense whatsoever on paper, until you’ve used said paper to write a stupidly time-consuming character study about them (but really, who in their right mind would take the time and energy to do that...), and/or have seen them fuck. Incidentally, that’s also why the pairing is always at its peak popularity in the fandom when there's regular fanfiction updates, because fanfiction was invented to cover both of those aspects.

Anyway... They’re basically laid out by the stars to be an opposites attract couple. They’re intellect, idealism and concepts vs. logic, realism and practicality. Sagittarius is at their best when they’re socialising and exploring, and they thrive on variety in their life. Taurus on the other hand is most content being at home on the couch workday after workday without their sweatpants ever starting to make them itchy. Sagittarius might start feeling bored by the dull Taurus routine and Taurus may feel overwhelmed and unsettled because of Sagittarius’ variety of interests and social-butterfly-ness. They’re the classic couple that has to put in a lot of effort and mutual understanding to find balance in a shared life, but the way they complement each other is all the more rewarding if it works well.

Diane finds variety and new experiences at work. Coming home to Kurt and the constant he brings to her life almost appears to ground her restlessness at times when it threatens to leave her feeling overwhelmed. On the other hand, she can always pick a fight with him when things start getting dull. Kurt, luckily, seems to be pretty content in most environments, as long as he has a stable job and a place to call home. Once those factors are covered, he - despite all his stubbornness - actually becomes very adaptable and even seems to enjoy the challenges Diane’s tornado personality seems to bring to his life, as long as it doesn’t touch those basic requirements (*cough* *cough* TGF season 5). God knows it has taken them ages and a lot of off-screen strategy talks (I’m just assuming those happened because it’s the only thing that puts the s2 to s3 TGF jump into place) but they’re figuring it out. It won’t ever be easy, but easy isn’t what Kurt wants, nor what Diane needs, as long as there’s stability and growth around them.

Moon signs:

Moon signs explained: rules your emotions, instincts and feelings; reflects your personality when you're alone or deeply comfortable

Diane: Scorpio

Moon in Scorpio explained: emotionally intense; crave deep connections but can be detached and obsessed with their privacy; intuitive, observant, rational, dramatic, passionate (h0rny); flirty but down to be loyal for life once committed to a partner; trust issues and fear of betrayal

I’m saying this with so much love: Diane is a piece of work. She won’t settle for anything less than someone who feels like the love of her life, but obviously in order to remain her posture, stay guarded and protect her stance as she who invented strong independent womanhood (the latter being her Sagittarius sun speaking btw), she’s going to put up walls that could tower over the Chicago skyline. Diane feels so much that she tries to battle the mazy tangle of her emotions with human kind’s stupidest response to any feeling ever: rationalisation. She just rationalises the hell out of her feelings until she can’t remember where the thought process even started, comes to either no conclusion or the most absurd one anyone could come up with (I’m being harsh. Reconciling with your husband after he’s almost split his skull hanging out of a car in some godforsaken Walmart parking lot, only to then ghost him for approximately four months is completely normal, mentally healthy behaviour).

She’s like a daydream dressed in a brick wall of nightmares. The right instincts and a craving for real, emotional bonds are all there, but she’s so painfully out of touch with anything internal but her intellect (and her Lockhussy) that she just walks the opposite way instead of letting herself be happy, may it be because she’s a clown or because she’s trying to protect herself (it’s probably both). Either way, she gives big water sign energy when it comes to the way she handles her emotions. The problematic kind (yours sincerely, a fellow water sign).

Diane is a control freak and she has trust issues for days. If those things were a currency, she still would have been able to afford the South of France house post Ponzi scheme, nay, could’ve purchased the whole of France altogether. (Remember when she had Kalinda spying on Matthew Overby to help her decide if she wanted to answer his “Do you want to be my girlfriend?” note with “yes”, “no” or “maybe”? Remember when she was upset about Kurt’s injury from the shooting range and had Marissa go through the Trump boys’ social media to search for pictures of dead zebras and giraffes, a task that literally did nothing for her except cost her about five minutes of Marissa-salary? Remember when she ripped the ointment out of his hands the episode prior? Idiot. I absolutely adore her.)

Diane is the woman who broods alone in her office in the middle of the night, nursing a glass of scotch when she's feeling down. Multiple times throughout both shows. She actually slams her head against a wardrobe one time. The slay. The pure drama. If that doesn’t give emo water sign energy, I don’t know what does.

Kurt: Aries

Moon in Aries explained: impulsive, hot-headed, determined; crave excitement, spontaneity and victory; strong emotions, sort of as though they have a raging toddler inside them who won’t stop screaming in the grocery store until their parents agree to buy them candy, but not because they're smart or manipulative, but because they just really want that candy and why shouldn't they have candy if they want some

Kurt is such an Aries moon and it’s easily my favourite thing about him. It has so much comedic value. As soon as he feels something, he completely unhinges, like a fully functioning door that suddenly just flops down to the floor with a bang that sound like someone screaming "Jesus, take the wheel". Vibing with the woman you used to date for a couple of months? Ask her to permanently move to Costa Rica with you (if she laughs at you because it’s fucking crazy, propose marriage to distract her). Cheated on your long-distance wife and feel terrible about it? Don’t tell her, instead sell all your belongings to the woman you cheated with and ask your wife to move in with you. She proposes divorce after you’ve been separated for a year? Wait out in the cold at her front door for hours until she comes home, then tell her you’re her friend (if she won’t relent, go to her office the next day and try yelling a little). Need a favour from her because she’s outspoken and you’re socially awkward? Bring her a thank-you-gift (so far so good). What kind of gift? Well, a gun, obviously.

I could go on like this for days. For someone who is super calm and practical and fairly reasonable, Kurt’s emotions turn him into a child with a temper. He feels something, he wants something, and he’s turning on the heels of his cowboy boots, determined to get it. And not even because he thinks it’s his right to get what he wants, but because he genuinely doesn’t reflect his emotions at all and therefore never even sees any reason why things could possibly not work out. And even if he did, his everlasting need for stability can easily be momentarily defied by his emotional craving for excitement. He wants to clash, he wants passion and leaps and challenge and fire, and why shouldn’t he have it? If it makes him happy, if it makes the people in his life happy, why shouldn’t they just end their separation and move back in together? If he loves her and she loves him, what is there to talk about? If he likes her and she likes him and work was a factor that used to get between them, and if the firm is stressing her out these days, why shouldn’t they elope and move to Costa Rica? Everything’s gonna be alright, what could possibly go wrong?

(Spoiler alert: You could be swatted for example.)

Compatibility: Scorpio moon x Aries moon

Kurt is very open about his emotions. If Diane upsets him, he immediately expresses his anger or pain to her. Diane on the other hand leaves a lot of her emotions open to interpretation. We’ve seen it clash, the result used to be another casual half a season with no Kurt-episodes. But if it works, it really, really works. If there’s one passionate couple in the world of fictional characters, it’s Kurt and Diane. They fight and fuck and they love each other so fiercely. Something that was a big theme in TGF’s season 3 is that Kurt seems to have found a way to get through to Diane when she tries to shut him out (something I’d like to call trust). He stays calm yet confrontational, he communicates to her that they’re a team, and Diane is learning to include him more. On the other hand, the way Diane tends to take rationality over feelings forces Kurt to find a more stable middle ground with her, which probably also gives him a little more peace than he used to have before he met her, keeping in mind how much he values stability. No, they won’t give up everything they have to move to Costa Rica together, but they will take nine months to travel the world or vacation in Italy. No, they won’t reconcile just because they love each other, but they will meet to talk and slowly start to work through their problems so they can do better for each other once they try this again. Their relationship was never all or nothing, which is Diane’s gift to Kurt. But having it all no longer has to be intimidating, which is Kurt’s gift to Diane.

The compatibility of moon signs indicates how people relate emotionally. Scorpio and Aries moons are both very emotional and passionate in two entirely different expressions. Aries is impulsive, impatient and aggressive while Scorpio internalizes and is prone to be passive-aggressive. Aries is very direct and confrontational, Scorpio holds grudges and tends to hide emotions behind the walls they put up around them. If both put a lot of effort into the relationship, the passion they share draws them to each other like magnets and can be very rewarding, but the dynamic has a tendency to lead to imbalance, with one of them putting a lot more effort into pleasing the other (I’m still convinced this is exactly what happened the countless times they tried being together pre separation. Kurt was much more emotionally available and Diane didn’t even notice how hard he was trying and how little she gave him in return, because that was just the way she always was with people. It was bound to end, and while I disapprove of the way it happened, it’s also completely understandable why he was the one to break).

Both signs like to be in charge, Aries liking the leadership and Scorpio seeking out the feeling of always being in control (a point that we’ve rarely seen leading to any trouble between them because one thing they’ve done right from the very beginning is that they’re very equal in their relationship and always staying at eye level. They have endless amounts of respect for each other and neither of them seems to try to dominate the relationship). Aries emotions are generally more superficial, like outbursts, while Scorpio is very deep. It’s overall a very challenging pairing that doesn’t usually last very long due to too many differences, but if it works long term, it’ll be all the more passionate and emotional.

(Well... that and the gun.)

Rising signs:

Rising signs explained: the mask you present to people and the way you protect yourself; personal style, first impressions, and experiences needed to make your life meaningful

Diane: Virgo

Virgo rising explained: appear organised, put together and reliable; composed and intellectual aura; can be intimidating due to their perfectionist vibes; communicative and curious; often the ones sought out by their loved ones for advice; care deeply for other people

Diane’s rising sign is basically what we see of her in The Good Wife, sans her interactions with Kurt and a couple of moments with Will and Kalinda, because they’re basically the only people that made her take down her guards in that show and because its psychological focus was so rarely on her.

Diane is regal. She’s classy, has a no-bullshit attitude and she very much gives off “that one teacher that’s everyone’s maternal figure” vibes. She’s the one you respect, because she holds herself in that certain way that just seems so in control, so well put together and smart. She’s the person you meet and instantly want to impress and your worst nightmare suddenly becomes disappointing her or letting her down. She’s also much less distant and impersonal than she lets on.

I think Diane is one of those people who still are very much defined by their rising sign, even though most of the time, rising signs become less important the older and more mature you get, because her Virgo traits are not a simple self-discovery-arch of her story, but basically her coping mechanism and safety net. And I think that actually makes a lot of sense. Her mask is what people have always expected, even relied on for her to be (organised, communicative and caring, like her mother probably wanted, and focused, intellectual, academic and perfectionist traits her father laid out for her), and therefore, what she herself expects to be. The firm runs best when she’s there to solve everyone’s messes. Her Virgo mask is what keeps shit running, and when she’s in doubt, she pulls it on because the validation she’s always gotten for it must be linked to a huge boost of self-assurance, the absence of it in turn linked to chaos and disappointment. Diane’s rising sign is everything she has to protect herself, but - thinking of her Sagittarius sun - it’s also what tightly limits her room for the personal growth she craves so much, which is probably why she’s losing it around the people she trusts and loves enough to define them as a real part of her personal life, and in circumstances where she feels like her understanding of the world is slipping out of her hands (which is super interesting, because while I don’t necessarily think that she always makes the best decisions when her guards are down, there’s a lot of bravery behind it that I think most people don’t really appreciate. She puts her guard up when she feels like she’s losing control, but when she’s at her most vulnerable, she lets it down because she knows she has to in order to put it into place and grow on it).

I don’t know if any of this makes sense, but I also think Virgo rising for Diane is the least controversial take of this post, so I guess it doesn’t really matter anyway.

Kurt: Cancer

Cancer rising explained: often described as “traditional” or “nurturing”; like routine and value their homelife, and with it their personal space and the people they allow inside; hard exterior, more sensitive than they appear to be

Cancer is the perfect choice for Kurt’s rising sign, because he just has so many cliché Cancer traits. Kurt lives and breathes tradition (I don’t want to talk about his politics in this post so this is as far as it’s going to get), and sometimes even tends to value them just because things have always been the way they are, not because they have any kind of emotional value to him. Speaking of emotions, Kurt is a perfect example for someone who seems all no-nonsense and practical (which he is, but:), until he goes on a date with you and pep-talks you through a full daddy-issues-infused identity crisis. I don’t have any evidence to back this up, but I think that because he’s so much more observant than communicative, he’s really good at reading the room, which is the kind of sensitivity I absolutely would link to a Cancer rising.

Long story short: Kurt has soft dad vibes and there’s no better astrology placement to express that than Cancer rising.

Compatibility: Virgo rising x Cancer rising

Again, because we know so little about Kurt, I have no factual evidence to back this up, but I was always convinced that Kurt has or at least had a very close bond to his family, while Diane’s upbringing has been much colder. The first and pretty much only two times she mentions her parents at all in the span of twelve seasons are when her idolisation of her father is crushed when she finds out how he betrayed one of his best friends and then proceeds to propose to Kurt (50% lovesick clownery, 50% spiting her dead dad, we gotta stan), and when she drunkenly tells Alicia that she was a disappointment to her mother. That’s a whole lot to unpack, but in my opinion, it’s enough to assume that Diane didn’t really grow up having a lovey dovey family dynamic that accepted her for who she wanted to be rather than what was expected of her, which I’m guessing Kurt did, because it’s the only thing that would explain anyone’s obsession with traditions and old ways to me. Someone who grew up without a stereotypical, heteronormative “America’s sweethearts” style family dynamic and still turned out okay cannot have had a bad relationship with their stereotypical, heteronormative family, right?

The compatibility of rising signs indicates how people get on socially. Virgo risings often come off as reserved and distant, while Cancer risings seem warm. Cancer risings really value their close relationships with friends and family and are the kind of people who tend to have a smaller number of people in their lives that are very very close to them, rather than a Virgo rising, who often has numerally more people around them, while their bonds with them often aren’t unconditional.

Anyway, I like this for Diane. I think it’s really good for her to have someone who brings that kind of warmth into her life, someone who gives her the unconditional love and affection, the safety net a family should have given her, even though the two of them make quite the non-traditional family. And it’s good for Kurt to have Diane because she gets him to leave the house and try some pasta salad recipes every now and then that haven’t been in his family for 376 years, but she also agrees to leave soon when the introvert wants to go back home. Remember that scene? I just love that scene.

---

Sooo, this was very long and I don’t have a real conclusion other than I love and miss McHart. Thank you to everyone who read this till the end, because while astrology is very much bs, this is also my bs and I did spend a ridiculous amount of time on it when I should have used it on my criminal law paper. Hope you all enjoyed this, and let me know what you think!

#mchart #diane lockhart #kurt mcveigh

[fandom-blackhole]

Greek Tragedies- Ancient Greece AU

AN: Alright! Here is the first of my fics im posting for @maybege 's, May's Birthday Bash! If you ask where I got the idea for this I will tell you I don't remember....because I really don't lol. This is actually the last idea I came up with for the fics I'm posting for this bash, and I wrote it first because I thought I'd be the shortest....well I don't think thats gonna be true. Anyway I hope you all enjoy! Please consider LIKING AND/OR REBLOGGING because it helps me out a ton! Love you all!!

Pairing: Hunter!Paz Vizsla x Goddess!f!Reader

Words: ~4.5k :)

Rating: Teen?

Summary: Living alone in a forgotten temple never bothered you, you liked the quiet that came with it. But that doesn't mean that when a kind and gentle hunter stumbles upon you home you're not going to fall for him.

Warnings: death, lots of death im sorry, bow and arrow being used as a weapon, descriptions if panic and dying, blood, description of arrow chest injury, loneliness, ANGST because I cant write a happy Paz fic apparently sorry not sorry, food eating (let me know if I missed something, I usually do)

Masterlist

The hunter was back. This time you watched as warmth bloomed in your chest as he stood in the overgrown temple and filled the small wooden bowl he had brought on a previous visit with wine. Gently he looked up to the face of the marble statue, now hanging with vines and crumbling, as he whispered out your name before looking back down and pulling out a loaf of bread and cheese. The bread he tore in half and laid next to the bowl, while the cheese he gently cut through before placing it on the other side of the bowl. The entire time, his deep whisper flowed throughout the room.

    “Goddess divine, goddess of bounty, please accept my humble offerings and forgive me for not being able to bring you the best. These were all I was able to obtain this week. Next week the woman next door should have ripe olives, and I will bring you what I can. Goddess divine, goddess of bounty, please bless my hunt again this week.”

    He finished with his head down, paying respect to the once shining altar. You ached watching as he gathered his bag and bow from where he had set them at his feet. You watched as his eyes danced around the overgrown pillars and dulled carvings. How you wanted to reach out to the hunter, to assure him that he had been heard, but years of solace and loneliness have left you timid and unsure. So you just stayed hidden from the hunter’s gaze and watched as he left the temple, and smiled softly when he stopped and looked back, looking where you stood hidden almost as if he could see you and said, “Until next week my goddess.”

---

You did not know much of the hunter, and his appearances at your temple were fairly new. You knew he had stumbled upon the ruins you called home only about a month or so prior, and even though the temple was in disarray, he stepped and treated everything with great respect and softness as he explored through the small building. You had been curious, he was the first person to come to your temple in decades, and with the gentleness he used to clear the altar you couldn’t help yourself from being slightly taken with him. 

    That first visit he did not pray, but he did leave behind half of his loaf of bread. He continued to come with each passing week, and  each time he appeared he would leave a new offering, most of the time breads and cheeses but the occasional fruit or portion of meat being added to the mix. The prayers didn’t start until his third visit when he took his knife to the foliage covering the carvings on the altar room’s walls. You had watched as his fingertips traced over the stories depicted in the carvings, your stories, your life from birth until the point of the temple being built. Your breathing stopped though when his fingertip stopped and traced along the cheek of your depiction on the wall, you swore the ghost of his fingertip could be felt on your own cheek and jaw as you heard him whisper your name. It was then at that moment, that you assumed the hunter finally figured out whom the temple was built in honor of. Before he had left that day, he had knelt infront of the altar and asked for your forgiveness for his ignorance of whose home he was in, but you knew he did not need to be forgiven, because his touch had done more for your home, and for you, than any others’ had in a very long time.

    You would not say you were a forgotten goddess. You had other places of worship, none of them large by any means, but you did have a handful of priestesses who maintained your goddesshood, but you were never a big goddess, never one that the people sought out specifically, most turning to the goddesses Demeter or Persephone, though that didn’t bother you, it only meant you had to deal with fewer mortals, and you were always one to prefer solitude. 

    Once you had had your own gleaming temple that brought forth many visitors and offerings and prayers. You’d loved that temple, your priestesses gowned in deep greens and blues, each caring for the small community that surrounded the temple and the woods that covered the land. The place was full of life and you made sure that this place, your home, would never want or need. You were happy, and you watched over them lovingly. But as everything goes, that could not last. 

    You never much cared to converse with your fellow gods or goddesses, not that you disliked them, well not all of them, but you just never cared for their antics. So having one of them show up in your village, to make a show of walking into your temple, you could not say you were happy about it.

    As it was, Apollo had always been a pain in your side even as you got along with his twin sister, and so having him show up in your little haven was less than ideal, but you came from where you stayed hidden most days and greeted him with a terse smile. Your people were wary of him, and they were smart to be, especially after noticing how tense his appearance had made you. Apollo was always easy smiles and hidden truths behind twisting words. As you tried to lead him away from your people, away from the temple, you did not expect him to stop you in front of the building, and cheerfully announce that the people should hold a feast and dedicate it to the two of you. 

    Angered by his unannounced visit and then demands of a feast, you turned to him and told him that your people would not throw a feast because it was unnecessary and demanded as to why he had shown up and disturbed your peace. Emotions flickered across Apollo’s face for only a moment, before his charming smile had come back, and with ease he grabbed your hands and turned to face you, saying, “I have come for your hand in marriage, I want you beside me up on Mt. Olympus. I think our union would be fruitful and bear many strong children.”

    The disgust must have shown on your face when you pulled away from him. Your only thought being, he came here to my home to make a statement like that and demand your people create a feast with their food for him? Aloud though, you only told him to leave, glaring at him and crossing your arms. Apollo, though, was not happy with your answer, having never been good with rejection, he pulled his bow from where he had been keeping it and sneered, “If you will not go with me then you shall be alone. I will make sure of it.”

    You couldn’t stop him, you were only a smaller goddess with lesser powers, and you were forced to watch as he brought your home and its people into ruin. No one survived, and in your grief, your powers seeped into the ground making the plants grow and cover everything you had once loved, covering your happiness from view. The temple became overgrown with vines, and the marble cracked under the pressure of heavy tree limbs extending. Over time, these plants and broken pieces only grew in number, the marble lost its shine, and the bronze accents turned dull. But you never left, you stayed in solitude and mourned the people you cared for and avoided interactions with anyone but the few creatures that would stumble upon your crumbling temple.

    Then came your hunter, and slowly you found that smiles were more common than frowns. You found yourself looking forward to his next visit, looking forward to hearing his voice whisper out prayers to you. You should have known you were going to fall for him, being alone for so many years, so to only to be met with praise and kindness was bound to make you stumble.

---

    He was back, your hunter was back, and like he had promised the week before he had brought a small cloth full of ripe olives and laid them on your altar next to the newly filled wooden bowl. Like every other visit, he whispered out a prayer. This visit though, you had grown impatient, you were tired of watching and not talking to the man your heart yearned for, so carefully, you disguised yourself as a priestess before slowly approaching the hunter.

    “Why do you come here each week,” you spoke quietly, no malice in your voice, only curiosity, but your sudden appearance startled your hunter, as he jolted a little and turned to face you. 

    “I...I am sorry, I was under the impression that the temple was abandoned, priestess.”

    His voice was smooth and deep, and hearing him speak freely without whispering had your heart fluttering, but you simply smiled at him and cleared your throat, “I did not mean to startle you, and you really need not apologize. Your offerings are welcome, as are your prayers, the goddess is welcoming to all who seek her.”

    Your hunter eyed you for a moment, before leaning down to grab his things, holding his bow nervously almost he looked you in the eyes. He didn’t say anything for a few minutes, but eventually, he sighed and spoke, “Next...next week I will come earlier. I have questions about this temple, but unfortunately, I don’t have the time today. I am sorry to rush off, but I wish you and your goddess well.”

    You nodded, somewhat disappointed in the quick end to your first meeting, but warmth bubble inside you at the prospect of him coming earlier next week just to talk. So you smiled and stepped to the side to allow him to pass back out of the temple. Before he could disappear though, you called out to him, “Wait! Hunter, what is your name? I wish to put a name to a face.”

    He smiled fully, and replied, “Paz, my name is Paz Vizsla.”

---

    The week could not have passed any slower. You paced about and fretted over little things, wondered over the things that you said, if you should have stayed hidden and not approached the hunter, approached Paz. But you couldn’t find yourself regretting what you had done for a second. You worried over it, but you also cherished how for the first time your hunter had actually spoken to you, looked at you, and with all the same softness that he used with his prayers and careful touches of your temple. 

    Finally, true to his word, Paz did show up at your temple, and much earlier than his past visitations. The sun had barely kissed the sky when you heard his footsteps approaching, and with a smile you jumped from where you were sat on the front steps of the temple and greeted the hunter.

    “Vizsla, you came back.”

    He laughed, and nodded before motioning for you to sit back down, as he opened his bag and started to dig through it. “Of course, my lady. I said I would come back, and I have been coming here for at least the past month. I hope it is not too early for a visit? I am just curious about this place, this temple.”

    Your smile brightened, when he pulled out some grapes and goat cheese from his bag and chuckled quietly, before saying, “I thought I might bribe you with some fresh grapes and cheese that come from my village.”

    Stunned you took the grapes he passed you into your hands, rolling one between your fingers, before turning back to him with a small glint of teasing, “Well, since you have brought such a tempting bribe, I think I will answer your questions.”

    Pleased, Paz settled next you, cutting off a small bite sized piece of cheese with his hunting knife, passing it to you before speaking again, “This temple, it is for the goddess of bounty correct,” he glanced at you, and you replied with a small nod, “I get the feeling that this temple was once beautiful. That it was held in great regard, but something happened to result in it being left to ruin, and to be forgotten.”

    “You are not far from the truth, hunter. This temple was among our goddess’ favorites at one point. In fact many say she called it her home, I believe she still might,” you bit your lip and paused, twirling a small fruit between your fingers. You wanted to tell the hunter everything, but the fear of his rejection should he find out who you were was too strong, so you knew you must spin a truth that would answer his curiosities, but not reveal the whole picture, so you continued, “Our goddess, she is the one that hid this temple from view, these vines, trees, and bushes are all her handiwork. I find that this temple is still beautiful, especially since it has been touched by the woman that it praises.”

    Paz nods, and looks around at the tall grasses and sprinkling of wildflowers, passing you another piece of the goat cheese, which you gladly take after having the first piece delightfully melt in your mouth. “That answers one of my other questions, I guess. I was going to ask, if you were still here, taking care of the temple, why you had never thought to clear the foliage or remove the climbing vines, but if they themselves were placed by the goddess they are sacred and should not be removed. I apologize for harming the plants that had overtaken the altar room...I...I thought I was being respectful, that the goddess may appreciate the care, but it seems I have been wrong.”

    Gently, you laid your hand on his forearm, only taking a second to take in how his muscle there greatly dwarfed the size of your palm, before you looked up catching his gaze, “Do not apologize, please. The goddess, she has been happier… in better spirits since you have started to visit. Your care for this temple, your gentleness in prayers have made her feel… better than I have seen in decades. She likes you Paz Vizsla, you carry her blessings,” with a smile growing on your face you ask, “Have your hunts been more fruitful since coming here?”

    He laughed, the deep baritone catching on the trees and echoing through the temple rooms. With a smile, he turned back to you and said, “Yes, the first time I had thought I had just had luck on my side, but with each week’s visit the pattern has continued. I thank the goddess gratefully, now the children and elders of my village are fed well, and I have yet to come back from a hunt empty-handed in weeks.”

    “Good, our goddess has always cherished being able to provide, and hearing that your village is happily fed will bring her great joy.”

    The two of you were quiet for a spiel, sharing cheese and grapes, before Paz spoke once more, breaking the silence, “You said the goddess favored me. How do you know this? And why, me?”

    You sighed, and stayed quiet for a minute, thinking over your response before you turned on the step and looked at him. “You ask how I know, but is it not obvious? Your hunts have been more successful because she has willed them to be for you. The goddess preens with joy whenever you visit, as her priestess, I can feel her happiness seep into my chest when you visit. As for why you, well there really isn’t a good answer for that. The gods and goddesses are fickle beings, much like we are ourselves. I think the closest thing to answer I can give you is that you visit her here, at her favorite temple. You take great care of how you treat her home, and you leave her gifts and offerings, which are what you can give. She never cared for those who went out of their way to gift her the best things, she always preferred that her people keep the best and just gave her what they could spare. And you never ask for outlandish things in your prayers, only for her to bless you hunts, never anything selfish.”

    Paz stared at you for a long moment, ruminating over your words as you just smiled at him and took in his emotions passing over his face. Then he met your eyes, a look of curiosity in them, but he only said, “I beg your pardon, priestess, but the sun is getting high and I must be on my way. First I need to visit the altar room and pay my respects.”

    You nod, and give a small disappointed smile, “Go on then, I would hate to keep you.” 

    With that, Paz stood and nodded to you before making his way into the temple. Instead of following him to watch, this time you stayed seated on the steps, smiling when his prayer echoed through your mind. Not long after you stood from the steps, and started to make your way into the temple, only you were stopped, as Paz was leaving he reached out and grabbed your hand, kissing the back of it, before saying, “I will come early again next week. I look forward to speaking again with you.”

    Then he started to leave, only at the entrance of the temple, much like you had done the week before, you heard him turn and ask, “Priestess, I have forgotten to ask your name.”

    You smiled and shook your head, saying quietly, “My name has not mattered in years, Vizsla, priestess will do,” and with that, you turned into the altar room, and hid yourself from view as Paz stood for a second before leaving.

---

    Your meetings early in the morning continued for weeks, and softly you found yourself falling more and more for your hunter. Every visit he brought food enough to share a small meal with you and to leave back on the altar as an offering. Some mornings he would ask you about the temple or about the goddess and you would share stories with wistful smiles and the occasional faraway look in your eyes. He had tried asking about you and your past, but you had managed to dance around those questions, instead of shooting them back at himself. You much preferred the mornings when your hunter would sit next to you on the crumbling and cracked white steps and tell you stories or myths about his small village. You learned that he and his adopted brother, Din, were the main hunters for the village, and the two were a bit competitive, and having your favor on his hunts had put him in the lead on their little contests, much to Paz’s pride and Din’s frustration. He told you of their matriarch, the armorer of his village, who in his words could take the dullest of bronze and spin it into gold. He also said that it was rumored that with her skill set they all believed her to be a daughter of the great Hephaestus, to which you only laughed and agreed.

    The two of you seemed to get closer, both physically, often sitting close enough that your arms and legs would brush together, and emotionally, goodbyes always ending with Paz leaving a lingering kiss on your hand or most recently your cheek. Each meeting and discussion seemed to last longer and longer, both of you not wanting to end your talks, and to the point that Paz was not leaving the temple until the sun had fully risen high in the sky. You were happy again, and your heart once again was full of joy, unlike it had been in a very long time. It showed too, the lands nearest to your temple bloomed and produced life like it had done before you had hidden it away. Birds and animals were now commonplace, and they even started making their homes along with the temple. Hearing the chirps and singing made you feel less lonely, and you felt at peace, the aching heartbreak hidden and now healing. 

---

    You were out front of the temple when Paz came to visit again, having decided to pick some of the flowers blooming around making a colorful bouquet by the time the hunter crept up beside you and kissed your cheek in greeting. Feeling heat rise in your chest you turned to look at him. Paz’s happiness seemed to seep out into the world around you, not unlike your own has, and you felt the ease of safety that followed your hunter spread through you once more. 

    Gently, you let Paz lead you over to the steps, to the spots you both had claimed for sitting during your talks. He cheekily took one of the smaller blue flowers from your bundle and placed it behind your ear making sure it would stay before he pulled back and opened his bag. 

    “I have a treat for you today, cyare. A merchant came through the village, and I must admit I splurged a little on these, but I thought we must try them. The man said they were called Strawberries,” gently, Paz untied the string wrapped around a cloth to reveal little red fruits dotted in little seeds. Carefully, Paz took one and removed the stem and leaves at the top, before holding it out in front of your lips. “You try it first.”

    You laughed, and said, “Want to test if they are poisonous on me before you eat one?”

    Paz laughed, and you gently took the fruit from his fingers into your mouth, gently kissing his fingers before your bit into the berry and hummed at the gentle sweetness. “These are good. You must try some.”

    Grinning at your approval of his trade, Paz removed the stem and leaves from another berry before trying it himself. You looked up at his face as he tasted the flavor and he nodded, smiling down at you, “I think they were worth the trade….especially if you liked them.”

    You felt heat rising in your chest once more and you looked down. Only to hear Paz kneel in front of you and reach out and cup your cheek to look at him. When your eyes met again, you felt the care he felt for you in the softness of his gaze, the care that you returned so much that your chest ached. You should have known at that moment that your happiness was too great, you should not have forgotten the anger that was directed to you decades prior, but at that moment all that matter was your hunter kneeling before you with a soft smile, and yearning in his eyes as you both leaned closer to the other. As Paz whispered against your lips, “I think I would like to taste something sweeter than those berries, cyare.” And in the next second, you found yourself melting into your hunter’s embrace, his lips dancing with your as your heart filled completely with love and happiness, moaning slightly as he parted your lips and pressed his tongue into your mouth with a rumbling groan.

    But happiness was not meant for you, even if you craved it more than anything. As your hunter’s kiss deepened, and the two of you were caught up in your love for one another, another being watched in hatred and disgust as he pulled back an arrow before letting it fly with a whisper of, “I told you I would make sure you were alone forever.”

    You felt as Paz’s breath was forced from his body as the arrow pierced his heart from behind. You felt as he tensed, before pulling back, panic in his eyes, before you both looked down and you screamed out in horror as you saw the head of the arrow sticking out through his chest. Slowly, Paz seemed to slump forward as you repeatedly said his name and pulled him tight against yourself, cradling his head in your neck, feeling as his breathing became labored and slowed. You could feel the heat of tears streaming down your cheeks, and the heat of your hunter’s blood soaking your once blue dress. There was no mistaking the arrow, or who it had come from, and your heart only screamed at you for allowing yourself to let this happen, but then breathlessly Paz was whispering to you, and you moved him to lay on the ground. You looked down at him apologizing over and over, not realizing in your grief your priestess disguise was slipping, and instead, you were showing your true form. Paz smiled at you, and weakly reached a hand up, cupping your cheek as your own hand held his in place, and he whispered your name and said, “I had a small suspicion that it was you, my goddess….my cyare.”

    “Please don’t leave, Paz, please. I have been alone too long. I need you!”

    “You will be fine, I know you will. Look at how long you survived without me?”

    You shook your head, and pressed your forehead against his own, closing your eyes, whispering, “No, I can’t do that again. I can’t. Not after knowing what it was to love you.”

    But Paz only smiled, pulling you down for a soft gentle, chaste kiss, barely whispering, “Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum,” before letting out a final soft breath and going limp in your arms as you cried out his name.

    It is said in myths and retellings of your story, that you let out a scream so loud people of other cultures heard its sorrow and felt your pain. It is also said that the king of the gods also was rocked by your sorrow, and took pity on you by taking your fallen lover and changing him to take the form of a large brown bear, as a companion to follow you. Now, as people pray to you, symbols of bears are included in your depictions in statues and paintings, each knowing that you go nowhere without the man you once loved. Offerings and gifts, now include strawberries, as they are known to be the last meal of the doomed lovers, and in front of that decrypted temple, still overrun by plant life and crawling with vines, the ground has become a large patch of strawberries, which are said to be the ones from that fateful day to which the goddess of bounty herself blessed to grow and thrive as a reminder, and they are often seen being eaten by a large bear, who, if you watch carefully enough, will carry a mouthful into the temple, before disappearing as if he’d never been there. 

Mando'a Translations:

Cyare- beloved, loved

Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum - “I love you,” but the literal translation is “I will know you forever.”

Everything Tags: @mysticalgalaxysalad @phoenixhalliwell @moodsare @perpetual-fangirl900 @night-snows00 @dumbass-simp-for-fredweasley @stargazingthenightaway @meabravo @just-here-for-the-moment @masteracewindu @litakino

Paz Tags: @bunny-fair @elinedjarin @shellyc9 @blackmarketmummy @djarin-junk

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[flowerflamestars]

I'm in a very angry-with-the-IC-and-Rhys-in-particular mood, and since I'm just rereading Daylight I was wondering, what is going through Rhysand's mind throughout the events of Daylight? Because it's basically his entire life CRUMBLING around him and I'd love to see the mental gymnastics he does to fit it all into his "I'm the good guy, actually" narrative. Or just his general reaction.

this is a FABULOUS question, thank you!

Daylight! Rhys is, in my opinion, the closest to a canonical (pre-acosf) character representation that I go for. He's so SO fucked up, and sublimating and burying all that trauma has, of course, failed, and it's all manifesting, in all these different directions.

To understand the level on which Rhys is losing his shit, it's important to go back to the very beginning: Rhysand, to Rhysand, is always, always the hero of the story. The down on his luck knight with truth in his heart. The struggling, just man.

He CANNOT seeing beyond himself for even a second. He casts himself in the most important role, as the only person whose personal consequences exist.

His mother, at probable great risk, takes him to Illyria to be trained- the precious, first-born, godly son of Night. To learn to fight- to learn, presumably, her culture- to see what that culture is reduced to, a harshness he will on day have the power to change. Rhys had to be, at some point, a great hope for Not High Fae denizens of the Court.

What does Rhysie learn? Illyria is harsh. Illyria is bad. Backwards and cruel.

He hates his father for...presumably, the crime of being a pretty traditional High Lord? Rhys hates the cruelties! the Court of Nightmares! the broken system!

So what does Rhys do when he has power? he fires everyone. He doesn't like them, he doesn't like whatever they did under his father...so instead of hiring new people, he removes himself entirely from a potential role in changing/mitigating those policies. See also: the Court of Nightmares, cowed occasionally, but not in any way governed by Rhys.

But he's the hero! He's destroyed the oppression! His Court of Just his Bros is made of women and Illyrians!

(Rhys removed the terribleness from his direct experience...because only his experiences matter)

So, Rhys in his head: the struggle, the hero, the man just trying to do it right.

Which brings us to Daylight....and Feyre. I know we can attribute the way the characters stop even remotely being sympathetic between acomaf and...everything else...to poor writing, but I also think there's some (maybe accidental but PERFECT) character work there: in acomaf, pre-acknowledged bond, Feyre is an important possession/ally- she's on the same level as the other members of the Court of Dreams, if the jewel of the collection, a high point in the story Rhys tells himself: HE saved the HERO OF PRYTHIAN

(which...let's not even touch on the fact that the deal he makes in acotar is CREEPY and he can only justify it later. she wasn't someone he wanted to work with in acotar- she was a vulnerable, hot young woman he fully took advantage of)

And then they're mates.

And then, slowly but surely, Feyre's personhood disappears. For two reasons: 1) Feyre is on a pedestal so sky-high it blots out everything. Good, pure, true hero Feyre whose adoration Rhysand needs like air. the happy end of his story, the prize and the salvation, the one who sees him.

and 2) ultimately, to Rhys, Feyre is an extension of him. A symbol: his happiness, his peace, his endless power, what he fought to keep.

She's his whole anchor staying sane, which isn't great, considering...ya know, everything. But the Story is Over. They are Happy.

Except- except- nothing is over. Post fifty straight years of torture, a freefall into war and fuckery, teen marriage and literal death, the consequences for all those things AND THE SHIT RHYS WAS PULLING LONG BEFORE AMARANTHA TURNED HIM INTO A CHEW TOY, are still present.

But now, he has something to protect. His golden future. His puppy Mate.

Because Feyre's safety is the safety of his power and vice versa. Anything he does is justifiable because the loss of Feyre is Not an Option. She is Happy. They Are Happy.

It bleeds into everything- and then it intensifies, because this is the breaking point.

The Az/Lucien thing and Feyre incredibly hurtful blindness? No Rhys isn't going to interfere- Az is so private anyway- if Feyre believes its a romantic bond, Feyre is right, she knows her sister, not that it matters because Elain is totally out of her mind.

Sending Cassian to Illyria? Illyria is a backwards shithole right? They're fierce fighters and that's what Rhys values them for- as the hammer of his power- and nothing else? why would there be anything else? Look at them fighting and hurting each other.

Nesta runs and Cassian is left throwing himself in battles actively trying to die and Rhys? Rhys is totally smug. A problem that hurt Feyre and his brother is GONE.

But it's not gone. Az isn't talking to anyone- and Rhys thinks this probably means Lucien is probably, finally fucking him- but even Feyre understands that Azriel knows where Nesta is. When this is proved (when Elain surfaces and they have the very fun kitchen fight) Rhys isn't happy- but he understands. Azriel has always felt responsible for broken things.

But thats not his job, it's Rhysands job, and Rhys has already made that tough choice for the safety of his own: Nesta has no place here. When she resurfaces inevitably, broke and wanting something, Rhys will stop her before she gets close enough to upset (hurt) Feyre. It's his job.

Cassian goes missing, and Rhysand sets upon what will become his eventual move: Illyria's value is strength. (a martial strength that belongs to RHYS). But they think they can take from him? They can destroy their own best chance? (Rhys recognizes Cassian's value to Illyria even while, you know, ordering him to slaughter Illyrians) They would threaten his power? hurt his family?

Rhys will not allow a world to exist where Feyre can be hurt.

If Illyria can't be controlled, Illyria will be put down, like the rabid creatures they are. (They were always backwards, Rhys thinks. Freeing my mother was the one good thing my father ever did)

But Cassian lives.

Rhys asks Azriel if he's been cursed. Az laughs in his face.

And Cassian is a terrible enemy to have. The strategies the loyalists are using? His, filtered through Rhys. The magical contingencies? Cassian and Az, trying to prevent bloodshed.

Feyre thinks, for a long time, that maybe the rebels have Nesta. What else could compel Cassian to even care? these people keep trying to kill him. they want to kill Rhys. the brothers suffered in the frozen mud at the hands of these monsters, what is Cassian doing?

And then the massacre happens.

And Feyre sick to her stomach, cries when she hears. Rhysand thinks about a little hazel eyed boy who'd never had a bed, a present, who'd been nothing until Rhysand plucked him up- a little boy who'd grown into a dangerous man, who'd just killed every person who ever contributed to his pain. Rhys thinks, knowing he'll have to punish Cassian for this, that it's over.

The camp lords are dead, it has to be over.

(Azriel hears and understands- because he knows damn well Cassian was something before Rhysand, and after despite him. That beneath those repeatedly broken ribs is a heart that was once so big so save him, grown strong enough now to save everyone who was like them: forgotten, abandoned, used.)

It's not over. The mountains are burning. Banners fly on northern wind in a language long dead. They're singing, the spies say, they call him dawn. Loyal-heart-as-dawn.

It's Cassians name. Not that Rhys, who never knew more than a few vile insults in the language of his mother's ancient, proud people, understood it then.

Rhysand, the long-suffering hero of his own story, has been betrayed.

He can risk no more- it's time to end this madness. It's Feyre's idea to use Elain- it's Feyre who is left crying, a betrayal Rhysand will never forget- when Elain, who they've given everything, Elain, perhaps just as broken and wretched as her eldest sister, refuses to help keep Feyre safe.

(Elain refuses to participate in what she sees as genocide, but as we've established, what consequences exist? the ones Rhys feels right in front of his face)

Azriel, Elain, and Lucien run.

Of course, if both Feyre's sisters are capable of betraying her, of course, both of Rhysand's brothers would as well. They are one in the same, aren't they? Marked by destiny, by fate for this hard and terrible work- of course it hurts. Of course- but Rhysand will stop it from hurting Feyre any more.

There's one force in the world that can stand in truth against Illyria. The Darkbringers- their ancestral, ancient conquers.

(Yes, I do think Rhys knows the shitty, shitty history of his court! He just doesn't care! He didn't do it. He's different. He's in Velaris with the common people. He has wings. He's not his father.)

(He is, in fact, far worse)

When he thinks of it, it seems perfect. Illyria will be destroyed- a loss, but a safe one. Keir, will, almost certainly, also be destroyed or at least critically weakened.

Rhysand will stand alone, the man who was willing to do anything for peace. He will rule over an emptied playing field, secure in a world where Feyre is safe.

The Hewn City empties, the armies march- Rhysand holds tight Feyre's hand, says nothing about the fact that nothing, nothing, will stop Keir from killing anyone in front of him when battle starts, and reaches once more for Cassian's mind.

His brother, his friend, his loyal right hand- he begs him to come back. To come home. That they can put down this rebellion and in his love for Cassian everything can go back to how it is meant to be, all of them together.

It does not occur to him to address the hundreds dead. The system he was complicit in and responsible for that ground a culture to dust and ash- what matters is brother against brother should never have turned, and Rhys, in his kindness, will offer Cassian this last chance for honor.

Rhys doesn't want Cassian to die- he wants Cassian by his side- but he will drown the world in blood before he'll lose his crown and hope and Feyre.

And when Cassian dies, falling to the earth in Rhysand's arms, Rhys thinks of penance.

A circle closed.

But of course- Cassian wakes. Death is not done with her right hand anymore than the contract between Lordship and land in immutable. Cassian brought the magic back, brought Illyria back.

Rhys is fighting for something personal- Cassian is fighting for a whole world and future, with everything in himself.

When the new border is drawn, Rhys doesn't despair- sure he's shaking, he's covered in Cassian's blood, his twelve thousand year old walls are smoking and the whole world smells like fucking Nesta Archeron- he's been the victim of curses before.

He won't let it keep him down. He'll be fine. He has Feyre, they're safe. Illyria is going to implode- and maybe, maybe, he'll save some of those that remain when the violence is too much, when they need a real High Lord.

They'll come home. Just like Feyre's sisters will. Rhysand's brothers. They fought for peace and Velaris has it- it is their home.

It's what they fought for, the happy ending, and it's all worth it.

It has to be worth it.

#Rhys is deadset a huge narcissist #and in the middle of a breakdown the entirety of daylight #he's SO HURT #But's turning all that hurt into anger #and an even stricter paranoia #its all catching up to him #everything from imperialism #to the shitty way he treated his friends #to the Winter Massacre that yes was absolutely him #this is more of a Shoreless Concept but all of feysand can be summed up #by Feyre making teary BUT WE'RE FAMILY demands and Rhys immediately committing a literal warcrime #and like #I do think Rhys hates himself too #but for wildly the wrong reasons #and never more or in a real way that overcomes how much he thinks everything he does is right #Cassian's death was a cost to them #as Nesta tells Feyre: what's done cannot be undone. Rhys chose wrong #the truly bonkers Rhys thing in canon #will always be that he's both represented as Most Powerful Ever #and the wrongly ignored underdog #when in fact he throws around power constantly for petty shitty reasons

[violentviolette]

So I was on your fandom blog and I saw that you believe Bakugou (at least in assuming) to have ASPD. Is wondering if you could expand on that? I personally see him as NPD but I'd love to hear your side of things

first off anon bless u for being on my fandom blog that takes courage cause it’s a wicked hot mess over there lol and secondly to everyone else yes im about to spend an embarrassing amount of effort overanalyzing an anime man, no u shouldn’t apply this logic to diagnosing real people u don’t know or urself, no its not that deep but yes u can fuck right off if u wanna cry about me headcanoning ur favs with “shitty” illnesses. eat my dick.

But now down to the good shit! So I actually think bakugou has comorbid aspd/npd. But for this since u said u already see him as having npd I’ll just focus on the aspd criteria but im totally down to talk more about npd as well if u wanna. (the rest is under a cut because frankly mobile users would have drawn and quartered me otherwise)

So first im gonna go thru the dsm v criteria that are required for diagnosis that bakugou fits/exhibits (leaving out the few things that don’t pertain to him just for length and also because not every person has to fit every single criteria to qualify)

1. Significant impairments in personality as manifested by

a. identity (self esteem derived from power, pleasure, or personal gain), self direction (goal setting based on personal gratification, absence of prosocial standards and culturally normal ethical behavior)

katsukis entire sense of self is built upon his ability to “win” and to always be number one and come out on top. He absolutely cant stand to be viewed as less than that because if so, his entire sense of self begins to crumble. Part of the reason he’s so antagonistic towards Izuku in the early chapters is the fact that Izuku challenges that identity. He (unintentionally and intentionally) challenges katsuki and wont give way to him (which is the right thing to do, but we see how “well” katsuki handles that). He also doesn’t have a good sense of “prosocial standards.” katsuki has created his own internal sense of morals and values, he’s decided whats worth his time and effort based on his own opinions and not on what society deems worthwhile behavior. He’s constantly getting admonished that his attitude “isn’t that of a hero” because his values are different than the ones of the society around him. But he doesn’t care, as long as he “wins” then everythings good. And its not until he stops “winning” and his behavior begins to get in the way of his goals does he begin to realize that he has a problem.

b. impairments in interpersonal functioning as manifested by lack of empathy (lack of concern for feelings, needs, or suffering of others) and lack of intimacy (incapacity for mutually intimate relationships, use of dominance or intimidation to control others)

I could frankly write a whole essay about just this bit alone but I’ll try to condense my thoughts. So. Lets talk about katsukis lack of empathy. This boy wouldn’t know another person’s emotions if they walked up and punched him in the face. Which they do. On multiple occasions. But I digress. Katsuki is known for his shitty bedside manner, his lack of concern for the feelings of others is literally what cost him his provisional license, but aside from with Izuku (who we’ve established is a source of Baggage for katsuki and shouldn’t be counted among his normal behavior because at the start of the series they BOTH bring out the worst in one another and overcoming that is part of both of their character arcs and growth and a main theme of the damn story. Win and save. Save and win. Ahem. But again I digress) katsuki isn’t vindictive or cruel in an unnecessary way about other peoples emotions. He doesn’t use them against people, it just doesn’t occur to him that they exist. But as we see katsuki grow and begin to try and change his unhealthy behavior, we see that he’s not oblivious of others emotions in the same way todoroki is (who I headcanon as autistic along with izuku (who also has adhd), but that’s a whole nother post lol), he just doesn’t know what to do with them. He can handle things like kirishima feeling insecure, because he can logically talk to him about how strong he is to encourage and support him, but really struggles with more intimate and open forms of emotional support, like with Izuku.

He also struggles with forming prosocial bonds and friends. At the start of the series katsuki doesn’t have friends, he has lackeys he controls with intimidation and fear because he doesn’t know any other way to be. He has trust and intimacy issues and doesn’t like people getting too close to him because he feels displays of vulnerability are what makes someone weak (see those asocial morals and values we talked about earlier). After his time at UA, a few large helpings of some humble pie, and the diligent and hard work of a small group of fearless idiots (aka kaminari whose literally too prosocial for his own good and has zero self preservation instincts, and kirishima who has an endless supply of patience and understands empathy and other peoples emotions to a degree that’s baffling to me) he is able to start deconstructing that idea and realizing that u can be vulnerable and let people close to u and still be strong. That the mortifying ordeal of being known isn’t actually the worst things ever. Also that when confronted with people who aren’t actually afraid of him, he doesn’t know how else to deter them from getting close to him. The fact that none of the other kids in 1-A take katsukis shit and even go so far as to pick on him and mock him and call him out on his bullshit is a MAJOR turning point for his socialization skills.

2. pathological personality traits in the following catagories

a. antagonism, characterized by hostility (persistent and frequent angry feelings, anger or irritability in response to minor slights or insults, nasty mean vengeful behavior), callousness (lack of concern for the feelings and problems of others)

I mean. Do I even have to expand on this point? I feel like no

b. disinhibition, characterized by impulsivity (acting on the spur of the moment in response to immediate stimuli, acting without a plan or consideration for outcomes, difficulty establishing and following plans), risk taking (lack of concern for ones limitations and denial of the reality of personal danger, engaging in potentially risky and self-damaging activities without regard for consequences)

this is a criteria where u have to adjust for the world these characters are living in. but even then, by hero standards, katsuki is still impulsive. His teachers are constantly admonishing him in the early series for charging headfirst into a situation, loosing himself to his emotions and anger, and letting things get the better of him because hes not taking the time to properly assess the situation, this also bleeds into katsukis inability to work with others or ask for help. He charges headfirst into a situation by himself, blows up anything in his way, and then asks questions later. His teammates are often left totally in the dark to his plans, motives, or other moves and have to just play catch up to him the entire time. In the deku vs. kacchan 1 fight we see this behavior come out in full force. He has no plan, he blows up half the building with zero regard for their goals, and leaves iida completely in the dark. Momo pointing this all out and dragging him for filth during the recap is another wakeup moment for him, having to confront the realities of his impulsive and negative behavior whereas before he was only praised for it.

so if we take a look at even just that, which is still about ¾ of the diagnostic criteria, I think u can see where this really starts to explain his personality. Katsuki is hot headed, angry, impulsive, stubborn, selfish, he gets in his own way more often than not, he struggles with prosocial behavior, making friends, and relating emotionally to others. He has a hard time comforting people and usually does so in a blunt and logical way, he isn’t great at sympathy and being soft, kind, or gentle with other people. It takes a considerable amount of effort for him to realize where his world view and his morals and goals are warped and doing him more harm than good, and he absolutely cant stand to be vulnerable or honest about his feelings with others. 

All those things, imo, as someone with aspd & npd, are what make me feel like hes a good character representation of what the complexities of living with these disorders is like. Katsuki isn’t inherently a bad person, and as we see him grow and change, we see the ways in which hes becoming better, but its still hard for him. And despite what a lot of fandom thinks, if u look at the canon, the main person katsuki hurts with his behavior is himself. And I think that’s really important because people with aspd & npd are so often catagorized as abusive villians whose only goal in life is to hurt others. Whereas with katsuki we see where these things and this kind of thinking gets in the way of his goals and ultimately hurts him. and thats what I think makes him the most relatable and makes his growth all the much more satisfying. Katsuki is both fundamentally the same and an entirely different person from when we first meet him. his personality didn’t magically completely change, hes not just a tsundere whose suddenly all mushy feely and hyper empathetic, he’s just learning how to deal with his emotions and the world and getting better at being a healthy person.

So yea, those are my thoughts! There was apparently a whole 1600 words of them so my apologies for writing u a literal dissertation on this lol I just really love this fucking character

#bakugou katsuki #katsuki bakugou #bakugou headcanons #bakugou katsuki headcanons #bnha headcanons #jack.speaks #anon #god i really did write a novel #im almost ashamed #almost