#there is no sense of self without you

[hydrachea]

Do you think god lives in fear of what they've created.

#i like to think so #honkai star rail #hsr #hsr stelle #hsr nanook #i should make one for yaoshi too because yaoshi is ALSO extremely fine #but then i'd have to go down the entire list of gilfs (gods i'd like to f-) #and we'd just never be done then would we #especially since the trailblazer is canonically thirsty for a couple aeons without me even needing to do anything #we all know they're super normal about lan #per a certain swarm disaster occurrence #who would win: the godly incarnation of the concept of destruction or one feral human with a bomb in their body and zero self-preservation #i spent way too long making this #we commit to our bits here #even against all common sense #ray's records #nanook please show up in the simulated universe again i miss you

[goodmorningnona]

yo can we actually talk about harrow's blood face paint and veil at the beginning of htn for a sec. i know a lot of people poke fun at it but for me as someone who grew up in a veiling religion with the constant threat of that veil being taken away it's like... not being able to wear that veil IN FRONT OF PEOPLE? that's like being naked before god. it is terrifying and traumatic to not be able to wear a veil or other religious garments. at the end of the day it's not even about god specifically, like i could meet god and even if he said to take off the veil i wouldn't, because it's for me. it's for her before it's for god. i felt for harrow so hard at that part of the book and i get that she's just a scrungle but i would love if we could portray occasionally the nauseating forced vulnerability and sense of injustice you would feel at your religion being stripped from you.

#it is really the worst feeling in the world #religion isnt actually about god it's about the internal understanding of self/morals being externalized etc etc #the locked tomb #tlt #htn #harrow the ninth #htn spoilers #harrow the ninth spoilers #i dont know how catholics feel about it but considering she's a nun she might be more similar to muslims in this sense but #for us (i converted later but i was raised muslim) literally being seen without hijab ESPECIALLY by men is like being naked #AND ESPECIALLY before god you wouldnt want to de veil #lessons of the hand and the mouth

[beanghostprincess]

Luffy not knowing about Zoro promising Sanji to kill him if he ever ends up losing himself makes me go feral because that's something they can only know about. Because Zoro's respect for life and death goes beyond anything, and Sanji knows he understands. Sanji knows that if somebody has to kill him, it's him.

And I don't even think it's because Sanji assumes Zoro's opinion of him is hatred and it would hurt less for him to do this, but because Sanji knows only Zoro would be able to treat the promise as it is. Because he would put Sanji's wishes before any feelings he has for him. It's not that Zoro doesn't care, but I think he respects people's ideals and decisions to the extent of being able to kill Sanji if he so desires.

That being said, he'd do it if there's no other way to fix it. If it's either dying or living as an emotionless machine, which is the same as dying for Sanji, Zoro would fulfill his promise. And there is just... Something about Luffy not knowing. Their captain. The man they're devoted to the most as if he were their God. Luffy doesn't know. It's something only the captain's wings are aware of and the thought of these two keeping this from Luffy until the end is just insane. Not even trying to make it romantic here, but the bond and respect these two have for each other is crazy.

Maybe it's the poetry of it all, too. Somebody like Zoro, who has looked at Death in her face multiple times and said "no", ending Sanji's life, who wants to give in to death to not experience a fate worse than death for him.

#bean posting zosan this is so rare and weird don't get used to it sweeties #kind of tired of people jumping to extremes with these two btw like- #they don't hate each others but they're also not best friends-- respect is something they value even more than those things #they're not good for my mental health they make me go insane #this wasn't meant to be in a shippy way but idk if you wanna see it as romantic you do you bc it could def be #it depends on my mood #i consider myself a zosan shippers on random days #you could also say sanji thinks zoro doesn't give a fuck about him and that's why he tells him bc we know this guy's self-worth is awful #but i also like to think it's because zoro's views on life and death are exactly what sanji needs #luffy would try to look for a way to fix this and they others wouldn't be able to do it tbh #i mean if it ever got too serious i think luffy could do it but do you really think sanji's gonna make him go through that #if zoro has to die he wants to die by luffy's hand but if sanji has to die he wants to die without involving their captain #idk if that makes sense okay i haven't slept at all tbf #one piece #black leg sanji #roronoa zoro #zosan

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

it does something incomprehensible to my little writer’s soul whenever alex articulates a phenomenon of the writing process i’ve always picked up on and then goes on to describe it in exactly the same way

#when i first heard him say this when i was watching the interview i legit had to pause the video for a moment #because it was like he’d actually taken my words straight out of my mouth #literally for years i’ve been fascinated by the little timeless pocket between dusk and dawn where there’s so much freedom #to explore creativity uninhibited and unobserved and without fear of consequence #the way it allows you to create things almost as if they don’t really exist #or like the rest of the world doesn’t #and the magic of that freedom #like if you create things on the cusp of dreams it’s almost as if they don’t count #they’re liberated from any usual self doubt or self criticism that invades the imaginative space during the daylight #why am i making myself sound like a creative vampire 😭 #i’m going to stop rambling in the tags now sorry #i fear absolutely none of this makes sense #kudos to anyone who’s read the whole way through this #the gist of what i’m trying to say is that it’s such a special feeling when someone whose writing you adore and connect to so much #puts into words elements of the process that have always resonated with you #and this is just one example too #right i’m going to stop rambling now #but one last thing before i go #on a more superficial note: can we appreciate how softly spoken and soft fluffy haired he is here?? 🥺 #alex turner #humbug era #arctic monkeys #alex vid #lulu posts

[uncanny-tranny]

It's really freeing when you learn that rationality isn't going to be feasible in the long run, not because rationality is this thing that only Truly Enlightened people get the privilege to experience, but because humans are just irrational.

You can know when you're being irrational, and sometimes, it is in big ways. But pretending like that irrationality doesn't exist or can only exist if you're "stupid" only sets you back from growing. Irrationality is part of the human condition - it is impossible to actually be this enlightened person people like to project themselves onto.

#positivity #gentle reminders #inspired because i started feeling disgusted about my HEART BEATING #but irrationality sets us apart from many other species of animals. the contradiction of the human condition is woven into us #what you do about that is recognize it and then seek to expand your world #like... it is irrational as hell to be disgusted about your own damn body and the way it functions without your dorect input but here we ar #i used to feel this pressure to never be contradictory in Any Way and to Always Be Intelligent... #...but that intelligence didn't come from a genuine understanding of the world. it came from what was just a façade... #...what did i have if not Intelligence (but not true intelligence; just the bullshit people THINK is intelligence) #in my quest to be a Better Person i ended up only dehumanizing myself and partitioning myself off into tiny little boxes #it's weird to experience that - to experience your own self being dehumanized BY YOU because you buy into what is essentially propaganda #if this doesn't make sense consider that it's Way Too Late right now and i should have been asleep over seven hours ago

[limonjarritos]

The wine bottle and symbolism

this is personally my take on the symbolism of the wine bottle/bottle opener as based on a post by galaxitic

The wine as a symbol for obsession for a loss of control. For how Vincent feels about his fixation with Rody. Of even in a way a symbol for Rody himself.

The wine opener being Vince's semblance of control over that obsession. That he believes he has control on his feelings about Rody. But when he goes to open that bottle its not in a semblance of control but that of panic, that of impulse but he still tells himself that it's something, not realizing that with a sip of the wine he's consumed back. His rational is consumed. Just like how this whole time Rody has made him drunk with impulse.

How the wine is admittedly what does him in.

Vince breaks the bottle, breaks 'Rody' through a lack of control. He uses the bottle opener to try and open the real thing, drunk and searching for more, willing to truly give into his impulses and be intoxicated.

Vince has for the most part up until this point been bottling up his feelings, playing the part of mild mannered and in control (though his control isn't perfect. The rat, the watching through the peep hole-)

Rody taking that broken bottle in hand, takes said obsession and kills Vincent with it. Because a broken bottle is going to hurt you. Because Rody is so broken right now, shattered, reeling from the revelation that Manon has been killed. The love bleeding from his body and a hot demand for revenge coming to him that results in the burning of Vince.

#dead plate #limon.txt #i dont like to tag people unless i know them and they're okay w/ it #i wrote this like when i woke up 12 hours ago and like- i hope it makes sense. today just has not been the day for my language skills. #syntax who? #anyways. there's way more to it than this i wasnt able to fully explain without running in circles #but like- something about bottling feelings up too. about how that bottle has to break anyways and intoxicate you w/ the emotions #<- why didnt i say this from the start would have saved me a paragraph #and how the bottle is rody too. how rody's care is intoxicating. how vincent lead to the breaking of rody #how rody's care left his body when he was broken and drunken up like the bottle #also another side point #do you think rody would have killed vince if manon had not been killed? #do you think rody cares that much about revenge for wrongs done to himself vs those done to those he cares for #he has basic self preservation ill give him that #but i doubt he would have contemplated that revenge portion at the end

[novantinuum]

gnawing at the bars of my cage

can we please Stop telling SU blind reactors all the fandom drama and SU crit that came out of every episode so we can allow them to just enjoy the show like a normal person at their own leisure and make their Own opinions thank u

#anyways if i see a SINGLE person comment anywhere from SU s3 to s5 that 'warning the end of s5 is rushed' i will rush right in with #'IN YOUR OPINION' #bc like i know i've beaten this dead horse against the wall a million times but It's Not Rushed Honey it's literally just Fine #it's an Ending #it's Entirely Serviceable #rushed would be if steven pulled a deus ex machina out of his ass at Garnet's wedding and magically healed all corrupted gems by himself #with the power of uwu or whatever #but NO he has to work for his healed corrupted gems #the ones that caused the damage Fix the damage as reparations for the harm they perpetuated #steven learns he is Not His Mom and gains a more stable sense of self #that's all p good and thought out shit to me #i think the ONLY thing that i can remotely point to as potentially 'well damn that was a lot all at once' #was the new fusions one after another. but like come on. why you gonna be mad about that. just enjoy it and have fun brenda #they thought they literally had No More Story and wanted to leave the fans this one last gift #and instead what they get is fans whining that it's 'rushed' #rushed has a shit ass connotation these days #why can't we just say what we mean and call it 'lean storytelling' #it's all the story we needed to get a cohesive ending but without any fat #and like i LOVE me some fat sometimes #but like!! even non fatty meat tastes good! #my god #jen rambles #edited tags to clarify my meaning ahahah

[puppyeared]

ive made myself more wet and pathetic

#new icon because im SUFFERING. im in HELL #its so bad. i had to sign out of discord so now im both lonely and stressed #because i KNOW im still gonna get dstracted. i just did making this URGH #how good are brains at working around things. i once set a 7AM alarm on my phone with snooze cause i was so sure my brain would #be too lazy and keep snoozing instead of actually turning it off. but nay it either kept sleeping through the alarms and snoozing #or actually managed to turn off the alarm half awake that i barely remembered it and then waking up late #i actually have a track record of climbing out of bed and turning my alarm off without remembering. which is impressive bc i have a loftbed #the other thing is setting fake deadlines so make myself panic into doing things ahead of time. but unfortunately that doesnt work either #because if theres one thing my brain will put all its energy into remembering its self assurance. meaning i WILL be able to remember #the real deadline even if i try to trick myself. cant ask someone to give me a fake deadline either #the only things keeping me going rn is that i have deadlines due at least 1 day between each other and excitement being able to talk with #crow after break. but you can see how well thats going <- ignores long term rewards in favor of short term pleasure #BTW CROW IF YOURE READING THIS IM SO SORRY TURNING OFF MY DISCORD WITH BARELY ANY EXPLANATION #im a huge fucking dumbass and i had barely enough impulse control not to block everyone in my dms because i realized that would send a real #really bad msg. youre not distracting me im distracting myself and i promise youre not annoying me i just really like talking to you and #thats why im just barely stopping myself from signing in. I WANT TO TALK TO U LOTS BUT AT THE SAME TIME IM KICKING MYSELF FOR DOING IT #you can be a little mad at me btw cause i definitely could have done that better but i was all over the place abt how to do it without #making u think im ignoring you. IF THAT MAKES SENSE. SORRY #yapping #doodles #puppysona #edit but last week i tried to schedule and give myself work periods and break periods using my class schedule #and reminders on my phone to tell me when to start and stop. can you guess what happened

[akkivee]

Intensely Spicy Curry Training: Hypmic Curry Drama Track TL

Kuukou: Y’all sure took your sweet time getting here! I’ve already got everything prepared!

Jyushi: But didn’t you tell us to meet you at the temple?

Hitoya: If we’re making curry, why the hell are we way out in the mountains to do it?

Kuukou: Because I just had a great idea. Check this out!

Jyushi: Ooooh, look at all this meat! So, we’re going to be using all of this in our curry?

Hitoya: Beef and chicken, huh? I guess it would make sense not cook these while inside your temple.

Kuukou: You’re half right, and half wrong.

Jyushi: What do you mean?

Kuukou: I don’t plan to make just any ol’ curry. Now it’s time for the both of y’all to mince the hell out of this meat!!

Hitoya: I didn’t know whether to expect if a corrupt little monk such as yourself knew how to cook, but I’m surprised. Instead of using something pre-made, if we pound and mince the meat ourselves, we’d get a far more superior product. Is that what you were thinking?

Jyushi: Oh, I see! That’s amazing, Kuukou-san!

Hitoya: So, where’d you put the food processor?

Kuukou: Ah?? The hell are you on? You’re grinding this meat with your bare hands.

Jyushi: …Eh?

Kuukou: Jyushi, you’re on beef! Hitoya, you’re taking the chicken! Punch it with everything you’ve got and make minced meat out of it!! This is a new training session I thought up!

Hitoya: What the hell is this fool saying??

Jyushi: B-But there’s so much meat!! Grinding it by hand is impossible!!

Kuukou: I don’t want to hear any complaints!! You don’t know that unless you try!

Jyushi & Hitoya: *reluctantly pounds the meat by hand*

Jyushi: *tearfully* …My body’s going to become minced meat before the actual beef!

Hitoya: Damn it, I can’t believe I let my guard down like this…! I shouldn’t have expected we’d simply make curry…!

Kuukou: You can’t expect to get anywhere with a weak spirit behind weak fists like that!! Lemme show you how it’s done!

Kuukou: *starts punching*

Hitoya: You bastard, those are vegetables!!

Jyushi: E-Even I could mince a tomato by hand!

Kuukou: It doesn’t matter either way!! Whether it’s vegetables or meat, all that matters is the heart you’re putting behind it!!

Jyushi: T-That doesn’t make any sense…!!

Kuukou: “Enlightenment can be attained through one thousand fists!” Don’t just keep yapping and put some energy into your hips and legs too!

Hitoya: Tch, I don’t see any way out of this… Then, I might as well get it over with…!! UWOOOOOOOOOAAAARRRRGHHHH!!!!!!!! *maximum effort punching*

Jyushi: H-Hitoya-san??

Kuukou: Hyahaha! There’s the effort I wanna see!

Jyushi: Guh… Because My God has unshackled the chains binding his true power, I, too, must unlock mine to continue alongside him…! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!! *maximum effort punching*

-------------------------

Jyushi: I-I can’t move another inch…

Hitoya: Ugh… I can’t even take the cap off my water bottle…

Kuukou: *sighs* It’s pretty pathetic to be that exhausted just from cooking.

Hitoya: You…!!!

Jyushi: But, I think it would be really nice if our training efforts could be felt by those eating our curry…!

Hitoya: …Well, I don’t think I’d say it like that, but I agree with the sentiment.

*the trees rustle and the birds chirp and there is peace*

Kuukou: The fuck are y’all talking about? There’s no point to this if the people who eating aren’t going through training too.

Jyushi: Eh?

Kuukou: Training can only be felt when you grow from the trials you’ve experienced yourself. Hopping off from other people’s efforts won’t mean shit.

Jyushi: B-but I mean, we’ll still be serving the curry to others once it’s finished cooking, right?

Kuukou: Yup. Which is why I’ve got…!

Hitoya: UWAH!! MY EYES!! IT’S IN MY EYES!!

Jyushi: That powder…!!

Hitoya: It’s red chili pepper!! Jyushi, run!! Move upwind so it doesn’t blow and stick to your mucous membrane!!

Jyushi: Eeek!!! *runs away sobbing*

Kuukou: HYAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Hitoya: Kuukou, you bastard, what are you doing? Are you trying to ruin everything we worked on??

Kuukou: I’m not ruining a damn thing! This curry will be spicy so I can provide a remote kind of training!

Hitoya: Stop fucking around!! There’s gotta be a limit!!

Jyushi: *runs back over* I think there’s more chili pepper powder than ingredients now…!!

Kuukou: Then it’s just right! Now try it.

Jyushi: NO!! I will not be eating!! I absolutely refuse!! Don’t even try me!!

Kuukou: Hey stupid, watch it, that’s dangerous!! Stop fighting me and just—Ahh??

Jyushi: T-The inside of the pot is pitch black……!!

Hitoya: Obviously. Chili peppers burn easily. Haah… Let’s just remake the curry.

Jyushi: But doesn’t that mean we’ll have to mince more meat??

Kuukou: Whatever, I was thinking our “Intensely Spicy Curry Training” was made too halfheartedly anyway!! Time to give it all I got and win this championship!!

#kuko harai #jyushi aimono #hitoya amaguni #bad ass temple #hypmic #hypnosis mic #til that you can make a meat paste at the very least by using a mortar and pestle LOL #the curry pissed me tf off lmao it was so spicy but underneath all that spice was a ridiculously flavourful curry #it's spicy enough that i can tell it's comfortably spicy for people used to eating spice tho!! #habenero is the worst experience with spice i ever had and it wasn't that bad lol but i got the sense it could have been #so i assume jyushi and hitoya talked kuukou down lmao or we didn't want a repeat burnt product lol #i decided to tone down how i usually write bat to try and not show my very obvious bias lol hopefully it worked #i remember slug mentioning sometimes a tl will come off vague in order to not get in the way of future developments #and i actually felt that tling this lmao like when hitoya was telling kuukou there's a limit for everything #i had to choose whether to make this about kuukou and training or kuukou and the chili peppers #the statement itself was a vague warning so my own interpretations of bat were getting in the way probably lol #statements without a clear subject usually default to the person speaking so kuukou saying give it everything and win the championship #is me assuming he's talking about himself and again i'm a little worried my own interpretations of bat are getting in the way #since kuukou's self reliance is blatant but also not if you're casually looking at bat SO IDK LOL I THINK TLING IS HARD #curry tl

[mitskijamie]

Jamiegender scholars should we discuss the recurrant emasculation by older men

#oc #also very interesting how much of this comes from Roy if you read Roy as a closeted gay or bi man #I actually read a really interesting article about the sharp left turn in attitudes towards homosexuality in men's sports #and how in the 90's (which wouldve been the height of Roy's career) <10% of male athletes surveyed described themselves as 'pro gay' #compared to 93% in 2022 #and how it's common for male athletes to kiss each other/share beds/outwardly express love for each other which didnt used to be the case #Roy was loved and valued his entire career for being angry and aggressive and soldiering through pain without help #('Your anger makes you the player that you are' Roy Kent will never leave on a stretcher' 'I played hurt all the time') #and Jamie (who he sees so much of his younger self in) is living in a much better world where that expection isnt nearly as heavy and I can #see the resentment there #I'm fine with him playing hurt I played hurt all the time. I had to suffer so should he. it's not fair it's not fair it's not fair #this makes NO sense im literally like a little girl playing insane dramas with barbies #jamiegender

[charismabee]

I love the New and Unending Dawn ending so so much. I love my little guys (the voices) and I want them to be happy and free to learn to be safe. I love thinking about them exploring their world, one free of pain and death, learning things. Perhaps even splitting off into their own gods, connected and 'us' but having discovered themselves. Able to develop past their lables like the contrarian did and learning how they interconnect and make a whole, never alone but still themselves. Just let them hang out and discover the beauty in the world together okay I'm cryign.

#slay the princess #slay the princess spoilers #the voices #sorry princess we're self actualising in your absence #without you there to keep us whole the cracks in us splinter and fracture into something new and brilliant #and our world is crafted from a softness that comes from knowing loss and suffering and empathy and sacrifice #we loved you and that is why we had to kill you and we will forever remain crafted in your image of us and that is what makes us good #if that makes any sense

[cassolotl]

Sometimes something puts me into my context as a queer born in the 80s and growing up in Section 28 England, and there's nothing else really to do except have a little cry about it.

“There’s a generation of queer people grieving for the childhood they never had,” Haigh says. “I think there’s a sense of nostalgia for something we never got, because we were so tormented. It feels close to grief. It dissipates, but it’s always there."

#queer #i was too small to know it was going on #and by the time i was old enough to understand it was too late #when i try to imagine a childhood without anti-queer and anti-trans violence as a cultural influence i just go totally numb and empty #like flipping a switch #you've all had a pandemic now right #imagine a pandemic that targets identity #imagine a pandemic that targets people like you #if you catch it you will die a slow and painful death and infect the people you love the most #and everyone else thinks that it's killing you because you are you #and 75% of the population thinks who you are is an abomination #and so no one cares that you're all dying #and then imagine that instead of it happening to you as an adult who can process that. it's happening to you as you develop a sense of self

[quorras]

every time i see someone call tron 'cyberpunk', i lose ten years off my lifespan

#note to self literally never read letterboxd reviews of movies i like i cant do it anymore kdjfgkdssd #say you saw the movie and the plot and visuals went right over your head without saying it #like. in what world is tron dystopic?? cyberpunk in itself is an offshoot of dystopian fiction. tron is not about an imagined future #tron is about an imagined PRESENT. thinking about our PRESENT relationship with technology in relation to the times each film was released #tron is in equal measures hopeful and critical about technology. that is NOT cyberpunk #the only CyberPunk that matters in tron is the Tron2.0 character of the same name #i will admit that tron's plot is cyberpunk derived but its. idk man its not the same thing #thematically its different. visually i think tron shares developmental artists with blade runner where the cyberpunk visual stereotype was #- established #but blade runner is more pure cyberpunk thematically than tron is. does that make any sense #and. and. listen to me. i am number one retrofuture fan. i love syd mead. i love moebius. but listen. just because they worked on tron - #- does NOT mean tron is thematically OR visually retrofuturistic either!! the visuals match the time it was made!! thats not retrofuturism! #thats normal scifi based on the every day!!! #tron is a sandbox and at the end of the day anyone can do whatever they want its all just for fun #at the same time. the entire story of tron is being severely misrepresented when labelled as cyberpunk. and it makes me sad #these are very shallow thoughts i just miss literary thematic analysis sometimes. my film studies classes cannot come soon enough #rex speaks

[not-available-for-comment]

“Image-obsessed celebrity can’t be struggling behind the scenes because being ultra-famous and almost pathologically protective of your public image is famously a very mentally healthy experience with no psychological downsides” is just as much of a dogshit parasocial take as “famous straight conventionally attractive if sometimes cryptic celebrity is leaving secret puzzles to prove to me specifically that she’s gay”.

You don’t know these people. YOU DON’T KNOW THESE PEOPLE. You can just like or dislike the music and it will be ok. I will not send the art cops to your house. Go to a coffee shop and put a tenner in the busker’s guitar case if you’re that exercised about it.

Also, not for nothing, being wealthy can be helpful with mental illness, but pushy stage parents and legions of obsessive fans historically Are Not. We’ve somehow blown straight past “money can’t buy happiness but it can pay for rent and doctor’s appointments which sure fucking help” to “no rich person has had a real problem ever” and I regret to inform you that that second statement is what the original platitude is about. It is, tragically, possible to have rent and groceries and doctors bills and cute clothes paid for without a second’s thought and still have a bad time of it, because even rich people are human beings who come from families of human beings and have human friends and lovers and staff and coworkers and part of the human condition is that sometimes some of us suffer.

I get the impulse to be resentful of someone singing about having a hard time when the spare change from between her couch cushions would easily save your life. I’ve been through a period of my life where I tried not to obviously resent my friends for *having food*. It’s ok if you can’t listen to her for that reason and in fact I’d argue that you shouldn’t. It’s painful, and it’s not the kind of pain that produces anything worthwhile, just more resentment. But “she’s making up alcoholism for clout” is such a deeply stupid way to phrase that. You don’t know her. What if she isn’t? What if she IS? Making up personas is literally part of her brand. Do you need a hug? Sincerely. I think a hug would maybe be more productive here. I’m sorry things are hard. It’s not fair. You’re right. It isn’t.

I just think one slightly overexposed pop singer is maybe not the main reason it’s hard.

#I’m probably not making any sense #but the utterly unhinged fanfic that just crossed my dash while masquerading as cultural analysis made me see red #I don’t even particularly care about tswift #I own 3 of her albums and don’t keep up with new releases #she’s done several things i deeply disliked #but i don’t think she’s a bad person #just young and out of touch #but the idea that having nice things is the same thing as being mentally or even physically healthy is rancid #it’s the cornerstone of the self-care bilking machine #and a way of making you miserable without giving you any tools to actually make your life better #HUMAN. CONNECTION. IS. HEALTHY. MONEY. IS. NOT. #that’s an oversimplification #rent obviously is healthy #abusive family isn’t #but your guiding principle needs to be forging strong healthy connections #not accumulating so much stuff that god can’t touch you

[wavebiders]

Thinking about how most of the time when you have the option to stay quiet during a companion quest you get approval for letting them handle it and sometimes even get disaproval for talking over them

And then with Shadowheart's quest speaking up with Viconia not only gives a +5(while *keep silent* gives nothing) but also if you don't do that she will look genuinely scared when Viconia asks you to hand her over

#girl just wants someone to love her and stand up for her😭 #I've been choosing to stay silent for all my pt's since I'm so used to letting the companions handle their own quests #so I always get the scared look at Viconia's offer #which is heartbreaking but makes perfect sense #she's spent most of her life being used and abused by her caretakers whose love was so desperate for #of course when confronted with that trauma she's gonna have a moment of doubt in regards to the person she loves now #but turns out just standing up for her beforehand cuts that panic short! #anyway I just think it's a very interesting character detail that having someone vocally have her back #is more important than leading the confrontation herself #bg3 #shadowheart #also not to get overly self-indulgent #but you know that one poem about how to the author being butch means this feeling of chivalry towards other girls? #that feeling is part of why this romance works so well for me #Shadowheart isn't weak and she is the hero of her own story #but you do kinda get to be her knight in shining armor so to speak you know? #larian did a great job of balancing that with still making sure she has enough agency and stands on her own #and without ever making it feel like the romance is mainly geared towards men #I appreciate that

[oozeandgoo-art]

had an odd dream that i was reading a comic book. sketched a couple of the pages i could remember.

#i might adapt this into an actual story because i am SO SO SO mad that it isn't a thing i can go back to reading #oc #im definitely keeping the concept of save-bot i fucking love save-bot he's just doing his best. i love a robot who wants to help people #im not equipped to be writing about underground rebellions with any sense of real tact though #besides its in a superhero universe/story so you know it would just be so sucks lol #sketch #god the colors were so interesting. the teal parts were all very precisely crosshatched and the fire was this gorgeous brush pen looking #colored inks that just seemed like they were MOVING #and i mean some of that was because i was dreaming but god even in my halfhearted copy you can see some of the movement #it was a bad scene but a really really REALLY fun dream. i love when a book can *get* to me so i was really enjoying it #put it aside so i could take a break and woke up. instant fury at the universe for not having it be a real book instead #ill reblog with details if anyone's curious. i can explain this scene but i dont feel like it #the green people are in a secret basement though. hiding from the government. blue jacket guy is a speedster robot named save-bot who does #rescue stuff with every fire department so fire suppression technology is not very good because save-bot "can just save you'' #however they're badly over their legal occupancy and the secret basement has One (1) exit so everyone is like really fucked here. #includinig save-bot who is going to do his job until he dies because he is an ai without any sense of self preservation and he cares #which i didn't even CATCH until i woke up and started tryin to frantically note everything down #and then i was like wait. the glitter on that last page before i realized i needed a glass of water to keep reading... what WAS that... #(it was tears suspended in midair because save-bot goes so fast and also knows he's so fucked LOL) #seriously i'm so mad someone else didn't make this.