#this did not happen I don't believe it

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[schneiderenjoyer]

The reason the whole age discourse is confusing is that bluepoch keeps pulling shit like THIS.

#reverse 1999 #reverse 1999 diggers #either he's fuking over 103 years old or this event happens when he's already with vertin #but given how they don't state the era each Storm reverses into we're not even sure if this is accurate #and it's not a typo since london's first subway actually did get built in 1863 #so wtf bluepoch what are you implying? #this just makes me believe more that arcanists are long lived species compared to humans and thus the concept of time doesn't bother them #which would also explain how they'd adapt easier to a shift of era since they constantly live in such chaotic environment #that requires constant adaptation at all times #but no srsly bluepoch pls just tell us if arcanists live a long ass time so i can label everyone 500 years old idk

[ectonurites]

Byler Week Day 5 — Secret Identities

very loosely interpreting the prompt for today but i've had this idea for a while and... secret identities, Superheroes, that works. anyone who knows me well probably could have seen something like this coming LMAO

also trying to draw Robin & Superboy costumes that look thrown together and home-made when i have spent so much time drawing their actual designs was a challenge

#'sam this is 10 years after where canon is rn why do they look the same' because shhhhh #it had to be 1996 because that's when Worlds Finest Three: Superboy/Robin came out !!!!!!! #also yes specifically issue 59 of Wizard (cover date july 96 publication date may 96) is when WF3 got a mention/announcement #bylerweek2023 #Day 5 Secret Identities #byler #byler art #mike wheeler #will byers #stranger things #anyways listen timkon & byler are different ships in many ways however #i DO believe mike would carry tim's 'im gonna desperately try to clone him back to life 100 times' energy if #anything bad happened to will ever again #PLUS like. some theories ive seen about birthdaygate with like the idea of will getting slowly erased from people's memories........ #i don't want that to happen but IF IT DID. getting a detective comics 967 'he talked about a friend i should have.. someone named conner... #and i feel that name tugging on my heart but i don't know why' moment with mike about will........ oughghghghg #sam draws shit #<- almost forgot my damn art tag

[azaracyy]

a lesson on good karma digimon survive week 2024 day 4: supporting characters

#digimon #gomamon #digimon survive #survive week #survive week 2024 #rambling ahead. you don't have to read the tags beyond bc there's nothing that important tbh... you can just look at the art... #exhausted from being out and doing housework yesterday. then got a last-minute job with very urgent deadline today #finished everything but yeah basically i did anything but art so #irl do be like that aint it #anyway it's been a long time since i played survive and my memory isn't that good #but i always remember the part where we had to protect the gomamon #and later they showed us a path via the dam allowing the team to continue exploring #it reminded me of just how important it is to be nice and do good things whenever and wherever possible #and be mindful with the not-so-good things you do and say #be it good or bad. karma is real even if you don't know when it will get back at you #and you know in visual novel settings. whatever choice you make really determines what happens later on #yeah believe it or not i end up thinking stuff like that by helping a bunch of adorable seal mons... #mmm i'm officially behind now so i might as well take my time while also rest a bit haha ;; #this week has been fun with survive week tho fr. even though i came in unprepared (when will i change) #gotta keep surviving #png

[moonkhao]

#not me thinking they were gonna give us dunkphuwin lmao 😭

#summer night the series #gmmtv 2024 #gmmtv204 #dunk natachai #phuwin tangsakyuen #my edits #the trailer was so confusing tho #like i don't think i fully understood what was happening #but maybe i was just too distracted bc of dunkphuwin #bc i did believe they were gonna pair them up for this for a hot second lol #summernightedit

[screwpinecaprice]

She's on a hospital bed, amnesiac after an accident and she's having a crush on this man who is apparently her husband.

@dragonuva's part on an art trade with them from last year! 🥰 It's based on the first chapter of Chiptune by Newlense.

Guys. This fanfic is my favorite FAVORITE connverse fic and I love it so much I don't care if the last update was in 2020 nor if it's never going to be continued. It's so tender and the angst whalloped my guts in the right places. 😭💕

#Yoo I can't believe I actually didn't post this. #There was a comment that described the fic as being like a dream and I agree. #connverse #Connie Maheswaran #Steven Quartz Universe #based on a fanfic #Pease ignore my own comment on the fic tho. I was so smitten by it it brought out the cheese in me. 😭😵 #There's something about the writing style that made me fall in love with it too. #Thank you for the art trade! #dragonuva #SU #Not my art #I will make my own fanart of this story. I swear. #Usually I don't mind that much if a fic is incomplete. I'm just glad I get to know and experience the story. #There IS one connverse fic that I actually did really hoped and was oh so curious to see what happened next. Last update on #that was on 2019 and it's marked ascomplete so I've just stopped hoping. ¯⁠\⁠_⁠༼⁠ ⁠•́⁠ ͜⁠ʖ⁠ ⁠•̀⁠ ⁠༽⁠_⁠/⁠¯ It do be like that. #I do have a guess about something in Chiptune. Because something about Connie's circumstance is a little odd.

[bonefall]

tall shadows line of "she was only a kittypet" kinda reminds me of the line "they were only slaves" from the prince of egypt.

What kills me about it is that like, at that point in the movie, the Pharoah Is Bad. Him saying that a billion babies where fed to crocodiles is A Bad Thing. It's the point where Moses realizes he can't be part of the royal family without being complicit.

But Tall Shadow says "calm down, Bumble was less than human anyway" and Gray Wing nods along (complete with the jiggly clicking noise that comes with shaking a can of spraypaint) and this is an example of them being reasonable. Level-headed, even, not getting swept away by the passion of the angry mob.

There are so many levels to how fucked up the Bumble Debacle is that you can't explore every floor all at once. It is an onion. It has layers.

#I don't take potshots at liberals too often but like. I have to here #Because GOD they are bad at defending their positions #They can't defend nonviolence because they don't actually believe in it #They believe in STATUS QUO #They're not antiracist. They're just pro-decorum and being racist/xenophobic/bigoted is rude #Very very rarely do they reach their position through introspection and thinking through their beliefs #So you see it in their art. #Unable to examine WHY bigotry is bad or what's so insidious they just repeat it #Or try to justify it #She was too fat/useless/not part of Our Bonds and thus her life is lesser #And thats why they have the theme of predestination making everything forgivable imo #And it not actually mattering what you did #It's the ultimate status quo. Change doesn't ACTUALLY happen because of people or our actions it's all just fate. #And this ironically makes them very susceptible to smooth-talking fascists #...also my lover told me im Bumble's Lawyer and made me an AA style talk sprite so I've got that going for me now

[stairset]

I think the portrayal of Spider-Man 2099 in Across the Spider-Verse is in-character in that aside from like Shattered Dimensions he's always been portrayed as a bit of an asshole who slips into anti-hero territory at times and generally has a "needs of the many over the needs of the few" mindset and given his specific circumstances in the movie it's not unreasonable to think he could take the actions he does. However it does kinda suck that since like 99% of moviegoers had no idea who he was before the movie came out their first impression of him is when he's in an antagonistic role and people think "antagonist" and "villain" are synonyms so now I'm gonna have to listen to people who've never read a comic saying he's a villain or isn't a real Spider-Man for the rest of time or at least until he inevitably changes his mind in the third one.

#hell you don't even need to read a comic just look up a let's play of spider-man edge of time you'll get what i mean #but yeah i saw a post that was like #''the first movie had a joke about how spider-man doesn't wear a cape and miguel has a cape they did that to show he's not spider-man'' #as if he hasn't had that cape since his creation 30 fucking years ago #he's not even the only spider-man to have one. spider-man unlimited is also a thing that exists. #even the first movie had that call-back joke where they see the peter from miles's universe had a suit with a cape #these movies have a lot of little details with deeper meanings but the cape thing just isn't one of them sorry #but yeah. play edge of time or find it on youtube it's good. #shattered dimensions is also good but miguel's personality in that game is closer to peter's for some reason #so edge of time is better for getting a feel of what he's usually like #but yeah i do think spider-verse miguel was probably more straightforwardly heroic like other versions before the whole dead family thing #and i think he and the rest of the spider society are just genuinely misguided about how the whole canon event thing works #cause like george and gwen don't die in every universe peter doesn't get the symbiote in every universe #even uncle ben doesn't die in every universe #but miguel THINKS those things always happen. that's why he got the others to believe it cause he genuinely believes it himself #and i think they all take comfort in the idea that these bad things that happen to them happen for a reason #i know that's josh keaton's interpretation for why spectacular peter joined and i don't disagree with it #that's also why i disagree with people saying that miles is The Only True Spider-Man There just cause he was the first to outright reject it #look me in the fucking eye and tell me spectacular peter and insomniac peter don't understand what it means to be spider-man #or actually don't cause i'll bitch slap you into next week if you do #miguel o'hara #marvel #shut up tristan

[romansmartini]

i think some people (especially on this web site) interpret succession the same way that people would interpret, like. glee. or bbc sherlock. or any media in the past decade-ish before queer characters and couples were more common in media. in the way that essentially boils down to “popular entertainment is so heteronormative, i need to hunt for clues that show the creators know gay people Exist beyond homophobic stereotypes” because that validates the queer person watching and any potential queer readings of the characters. and that period of time is still SO fresh, and queer representation in media is still not what it could or should be. 

but it’s just interesting and i think kind of unfruitful when people interpret the scenes of this show as clues or proof that greg is gay irl or something.

not only is that just patently Not The Point Of The Show, it’s also like. we don’t need to see a scene where greg comes out as gay. his dad who abandoned him was gay. logan calls every one of his family members a faggot if they do something he just slightly doesn’t like. tom asked greg the first day they met if greg would kiss him as a power play or plea for affection or a sign of his latent sexuality. etc etc etc. and all of these connect inextricably to the show’s actual themes and message. what exists in the show already is so much more meaningful and complex than any cumulative “proof” could be, and i think interpreting it as such undervalues the show’s thoughtful writing. 

#just seen some posts that got me thinking 🤔 #succession #don't get it twisted. i am still delusional and i want those guys to fuck and believe in my heart they will #i just think that we can and should interpret queer messaging in shows differently than we did 10 years ago #and having greg say 'im gay uncle logan' is just simply. unnecessary #the queer community does not necessarily get a win if that happens. hopefully the win is viewers analyzing the reality of homophobia #in rich/white/intergenerational places #and most importantly. the win is looking at those guys and thinking. yeah they are fucking silly style

[macadam]

Throwback to when someone referred to me as the matpat of transformers

#very few will remember this because it really happened so casually and also... almost 2 years ago now #in the era I like to refer to as this blog's prime #on a little post someone tagged me in #and I was such a champ about it. I was so normal and did not make a scene #but I think about it at least once a month #it really was so crazy. what did I even do #I still don't know if I should be offended or not. I know it was written to place me in high regards #but that somehow made it hit so much harder #it's the type of thing that happens and you gasp and talk about it in discord but it doesn't feel that crazy. and then you look back and go #I can't believe that was a real thing that was said to me #I can't believe.. if only for a moment.. that is how I exist in someone's mind #Mac mumbles #the titles I was given in 2021... the range #chill laid back guy #bug in a jar anon wants to study #uptight annoying prick #insane individual trying to pass off as a chill laid back guy #<- favourite one btw #and lastly #the matpat of transformers #what an era

[wistfulwatcher]

YELLOWJACKETS | 2.04 “OLD WOUNDS”

#yellowjackets #yellowjacketsedit #lottienatedit #mine #edit #* #scene* #otp: you keep coming back alive don't you #otp #i've been waiting for someone to gif this and haven't seen it yet so i felt obligated to lol #i still cannot believe this happened like??? this was so gay for no reason??? why did lottie need to be getting dressed??? #anyway stay winning lottienat shippers 🤣

[time-is-restored]

btw not to make everything about My Fucking Guy but i honestly think one of the things that seperates q!phil out from the other islanders is the approach he takes to dealing with the lack of agency + control all the islanders have over whatever the fuck the federation's doing.

it shows up most prominently whenever tubbo is excitedly telling him about the 'progress' he's made with cucurucho or various investigations (ie: trapping him into a corner with the 'do you have free will' questions), and phil always shoots it down w an immediate 'that doesn't mean anything. curucuho will say anything to mess with you. you can't take anything he says as true.'

and it's not that phil is... a paticularly pessimistic character? he's just EXTREMELY practical. like, he's yet to give up on anyone EVER finding ANY answers (he was the one who initially gave the federation that one week ultimatum w the cage for a cage stream), he just doesn't trust the idea that curucuho is ever going to voluntarily give them. they're uncontrollable + senseless - you might as well argue with the weather.

and like, if that's how he sees the one (1) and only point of contact the islanders HAD with the federation for months, it explains a lot abt his characters lifestyle! ofc he sits on the wall all day, talking to his kids, and keeping his head down. he believes that the federation wants nothing more than to drag the islanders into sick games + tasks just so they can fuck with their head (ie: curucuho revealing he was the one cellbit gathered all that information for). and while he can't totally PREVENT any of that from ever impacting him, he can make sure his kids are well fed, well protected, and as happy + comfortable as he can manage. this is objectively not a perfect situation, there is a guaranteed amount of suffering + fear that he can't mitigate, but he can at least account for it.

like, he REFUSES to engage. whenever curucho shows up, he treats them with total ambivalence. he's not going to get riled up by anything they do, he's not going to get super attached to the guy, he's just gonna laugh it off and irish goodbye it when things drag on. the ONLY time he's strayed from that general guiding principle has been since he's lost his eggs, and can no longer afford to let the federation's fuckery go: those are his fucking kids.

hence the completely unprecedented levels of outward rage and sadness and terror he shows throughout the birdcage streams - almost all directed directly to cucurucho. it's all a completely fair + proportional response to the horror the islanders are being subjected to, but it feels so different bc until now, q!phil has been so dedicated to not reacting, and not giving the federation any sign that they're actually getting to him.

#qsmp #q!phil #LIKE. does anyone else think this! i genuinely believe its like one of the major #traits of his character i feel like u can trace it through Everything. #the man lives with the constant knowledge that sometimes all it takes is a tempting ravine and a badly timed creeper to end a life #whether that life belongs to a stranger or someone you love more than anything else in the world #you COULD rage against that. you could scream and shout and tear your hair out and grieve for the futility of it all #but what does that change? the days march on. death waits either way #and that's not to say he's a laizesfair kind of guy. anyone who's seen him stress out abt chayanne's risk taking + freak out #whenever his kids don't have enough autofeed grist can see that he cares DEEPLY. which resolves into his very distinctive #defensive + protective playstyle. the goal is not to win the fight the goal is to *survive* the fight etc #but the only way that mindset doesn't spill out into unchecked paranoia + complete agoraphobia is with acceptance #'shit happens: the philza minecraft story' #i also think it even manifests in the nightmare sequence w his last words to chayanne? 'they didn't want us to live. we were never supposed #to survive' or whatever the exact wording was #he is FURIOUS and deeply hurt and sad abt the deaths he says so explicitly later #but at the time the first thing he reaches for is. exhausted acceptance. it wasn't their fault. it wasn't his fault. they did their best. #they could only do so much in the face of the federation's Overwhelming Hostility. y'know? #mine

[greenerteacups]

What do you think as Hermione's career would be post battle of Hogwarts? To me her being minister for magic really doesn't make sense. She does not have patience or tact to wade through murky waters of politics 😭😭

So hard to say! The Trio are so, so young when we leave them, I find it almost impossible to project their futures farther than a few years out. The job that suited me at 17 would be radically unsuited to me now. That's why of all the Trio, Ron's ending strikes me as the most realistic — he jumps straight into the save-the-world business again, burns out, realizes he's actually Done The Fuck Enough, Thanks, and pivots into a low-stress career where he gets to see his family a lot. Feels accurate! The others are weirder to me because they do seem to just... pick a lane and stay there.

With Hermione, you could spin her a couple ways. You could say that she leans into her bookish side and does research or teaching, which is not my preference for a couple reasons (namely, I don't think Hermione would like academia as a profession; she finds her classwork interesting and enjoys intellectual validation, but she'd be stifled and wasted in a DPhil program, and she'd be infuriated by the administrative politicking of your average higher-ed faculty). You could say that she gets disaffected with politics and ends up as a barrister or a lobbyist of some kind, but if anything that requires more political finesse, because you don't actually have institutional power, you're just handling the people who make decisions and trying to persuade them of your goals. This is not Hermione's preferred method of influence. She's not even particularly good at persuasion, she just happens to be smart enough (and right often enough) that people take her ideas seriously.

Or you could say her brashness fades with the years into a softened flavor of tell-you-like-it-is honesty, which some politicians actually do successfully trade on; as we see in British politics today, you don't have to be all that charming or clever to get ahead, you just need to be really driven and well-connected (which Hermione completely is; she fought shoulder-to-shoulder with the first postwar Minister and her bestie, the Literal Messiah, runs the Auror Office.) But I don't know if Hermione especially wants to be Minister, after the war. She's just watched years of horrendous bureaucratic incompetence plunge the country into a violent civil conflict. She's had not one, but two Ministers of Magic try to bully or shame her friends into complicity with fascism. Her view of government is... likely extremely dark.

But Hermione also isn't the kind of person who sees her life as a quest for happiness. Babygirl has a savior complex that makes Harry look selfish. (She basically kills her parents — yeah, obliviating is a form of murder, #changemymind — "for their own good," and justifies every batshit, vindictive, mean-spirited move she ever pulls on the grounds that it "helps" one of her friends.) She is a mean, lean, dragon-slaying machine, and she needs a dragon. After Voldemort, the Ministry is the no. 1 threat to muggle-borns and non-wizarding Beings. As a war heroine with basically infinite political capital, I'd be surprised if she didn't try to do something there. That said, Hermione is so vivacious and dynamic that she could potentially grow in a hundred different directions; it's possible that all of this, while true of her at 18, becomes completely inaccurate by 22. That's why I'm not too fussed about any particular fanon interpretation.

#greenteacup asks #sidebar: I know Minister “of” Magic is an Americanism but mea culpa #Someday I might actually bite it and pay someone to britpick Lionheart but I can't do it now #because I have a ban on editing published fic unless it's finished. Otherwise I'll never get around to writing the actual ending #I have a Process #is it the best process? likely not! but it makes the words go. so here we are. #I also think the fact that JKR is Gen X makes a difference here. careers worked differently in the 80s and 90s than they do now #i.e. we have the gig economy and a lot more mobility and EXPECTATION of mobility in your early life #that means career changes & professional pivots through your 20s and 30s are increasingly normal #and in fact have always been normal — but the image of the 'true' or 'ideal' career has changed #so we look at those careers and go hm. really? none of them changed? #none of them even went to uni? do wizards... just not? #but again. I believe the epilogue was written almost completely without consideration as to what happened between the BOH and then #I really believe that JKR did not know what happened to Harry except a wedding and 3 kids. because that was the whole point #I don't think she even knew what his career was when she wrote that scene #It existed to marry everyone off and do a quick munchkin headcount #because of the understandable temptation as an author to keep your hand on the wheel. but it didn't even matter! #the epilogue changed NOTHING! it was the most useless chapter in the series! I just — GOD #you can absolutely accuse me of being sour grapes about my ships getting nixed. I AM sour grapes. I AM a hater. #AND I have plot/theme/craft reasons for disliking it. #I'm not objective. I just want credit for being a sophisticated hater. my grapes may be sour but they're still artisinal.

[anna-dreamer]

I had a night thought, i've never realised before, with all the dark parallels between Elwing's and Maedhros' fall, that Elrond and Elros potentially had two suicidal parent figures at different moments in time. It's just... For Elrond and Elros to lose two people who played such a huge and heavy and bitter and complicated part in their upbringing, to suicide. It's bad enough to be abandoned by their mother and then to be kidnapped by her pursuers, adopted and raised by them - only to be abandoned by them too. But to have this dreadful lingering impression that their guardians consciously chose death over them. It doesn't matter how true it actually is, it must be devastating anyway.

#tw sui #silmarillion #Elros #elwing #elrond #maedhros #maglor #earendil #kidnap family #for the record i don't blame elwing for what happened to her and her children #I believe she was a good enough mother #But that doesn't mean her actions did not leave any scars

[roboticutie]

It's a side-mission that I don't think many end up doing, at least from the lack of talking about it I see, but still. The figurines. If you succeed a check in the pawn shop, you can take a figurine of a headless soldier on a horse. If you've done that, when you inspect the stained glass Dolores Dei you can get the task to give her any and all figurines you can find. Perhaps you can one day. Even when you get this task, though, it feels odd- it confuses your Logic because Dei has long since passed, but... Maybe you can give her these gifts somehow? You can find another figurine in the unplayable Wirral expansion pack (I only found it bc I didn't know you couldn't play Wirral w Kim). There are only these 2, according to the wiki, and I have not found more.

This task is another moment where the writers really manage to emulate that feeling of not only loss, but lost-ness that you get a few times in the game. When I did this task I thought it would be something extraordinary, maybe vaguely supernatural as there are a few things confirmed to be unexplainable happening with and around Harry, y'know? I had hope and intrigue and didn't even realize how strange and rare it must be to get this task on accident bc after typing it out I realized the starting parameters were VERY specific and easy to miss, actually. And I was so excited to find who to give it to, maybe a lost shrine, or someone reaching through a spot of pale and time, maybe when I found 3 or 5 I could lay them at her shattered feet and look behind the glass, something odd and unexplainable.

Then I met her in the dream. And just before it ended I was reminded that I'm supposed to give Dei the figurines. And that's when it dawned on me what Harry had forgotten, and I knew what he'd done to his memory of Dora by combining the two, and... It was so sobering and desolate. It felt the same way the end of a party feels, when you're the last to leave. The balloons are still up, but there's streamers on the floor, crumbs on the plates, bowls of snacks emptied, walls that held and echoed laughter are silent. The after image of something amazing, left only with the memory and the knowledge that that moment will never, ever happen the same way again.

You fulfill this task by giving all found figurines to Dora in the final dream.

And it does nothing. It doesn't work. Nothing will work. She would have liked them once, but like Dei, that Dora is dead. She died years ago and the Dora that remains is far, far away now.

Just like when I had no idea the carriage was Harry's until Kim spelled it out for us 2 hours later after chatting and whistling and relaxing; the figurines made what Harry was feeling and going through dawn on me so personally. I can't explain it in words well enough. I was so disappointed the figurines weren't some greater purpose, I was sad this was all we were holding onto them for, I was disappointed in Harry for trying to use trinkets to win her back, I was upset that they didn't do anything good, she didn't even want them; and I knew that's what Harry felt in that moment, too.

It's a level of "Show, don't tell," that not many writers set themselves up to be able to achieve. Even in this game there are only a handful of moments that are able to put you into Harry's headspace so precisely, and all of them are very specific and rely heavily on context given or lost on the player. It's impressive. I think about those figurines a lot.

#disco elysium #long post #de spoilers #i didn't get the hints that my husband did irt Harry's MC bc my perception wasn't high enough to check the fence at first #so when it did light up i forgot i never checked it and just ignored it #and that's a pretty huge clue #i can't remember if i found the tyre tracks either. i think i did but i assumed they were Kim's bc he is a Speedfreak and #i believe i saw them after he took the body away #so it didn't even occur to me to ask how the hell Harry got to martinaise in the first place #i assumed he'd been dropped off or it was one of those things writers frequently don't explain bc it often is not explained! #it's just bam youre here! y'know? #so i was totally blindsided by the fact that that was MY mc and I/Harry had forgotten so completely what had happen to Tequila Sunset #and the dora figurines task was a more complex and saddening realization akin to experiencing that complete amnesia Harry is going thru #it is Really well done even if it is a hollow and sad feeling it creates. that's its intention and i appreciate and respect that a lot

[zo1nkss]

s3 opens with Stede walking into he and Ed's shared bedroom. Izzy's half-transparent ghost is sitting at the desk with his legs propped up.

"Christ didn't you die?!"

"I did," Izzy smirks. "Can't get rid of me that easily, Bonnet."

#Void Rambles #I'm sorry it's the last glimmer of Stizzy in me I can't stop putting them into situations together in my head #they don't even fuck at this point they just annoy each other in equal measure #ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #I refuse to tag this speculation #if it happens I will simply scream that I said it because I did and you will all believe me