#this has haunted me for so long | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

iridescentmirrorsgenshin · 2 months

Text

This is an analysis of Kaveh and Alhaitham’s argument posted on the Port Ormos bulletin board!! Because it is crazy actually!!

I think this exchange of theirs out of the three posted throughout Sumeru is particularly interesting, and this is due Alhaitham openly expressing that Kaveh does not understand what Alhaitham is really trying to say to him: “I have never denied what you meant, but you don’t understand what I am saying to you at all.”

This exchange is relevant in various ways in exploring the motif of communication. As according to their usual rapport, the two disagree over their differing philosophies, as in sensibility versus rationality, however, Alhaitham’s particular concerns in Kaveh spending his money on “nonsense” highlights the underlying reason for this exchange. From this comment, the argument is recontextualised through Alhaitham’s intention for getting involved, as Kaveh prompts the workmen to take his money in order to help them out.

When Alhaitham states that this is a meaningless action due to the inevitability of people rising or falling on their own accord, rather than solely critiquing Kaveh’s “impulsiv[e]” altruism, as Kaveh interprets, Alhaitham is directly contradicting his own comment – as he is interfering on Kaveh’s decisions.

As concern is evidently the intention behind his interference, Kaveh cannot perceive this, and instead attempts to critique Alhaitham’s perspective in return, although Alhaitham states: “Make no mistake. I have never denied what you meant…” This response asserts that Alhaitham does not deny, but rather agrees with, Kaveh’s statement of “mutual assistance, fairness, and righteous anger” driving the world.

In lieu of this, rather than continuing the argument, Alhaitham claims that there is no point to it, as Kaveh does not understand what he is saying, as in, Kaveh does not understand that his intentions in interfering are out of concern. He follows this up, regardless, by criticising Kaveh’s handling of his budget, as, evidently, Kaveh has offered to give his own money to these workmen, and refuses to pay for Kaveh’s drinks for that month.

For Alhaitham, Kaveh’s lack of self-prioritisation leads him to impulsive altruistic acts which serve to jeopardise his own position, particularly regarding money. If Kaveh can afford to give away money, he can afford to pay his own tabs, is the takeaway from this exchange. Although, similarly to the exchange between them posted in Puspa’s Café, this applies to one particular month, insinuating that Alhaitham will continue to pay for next month’s tabs of his own accord.

The main argument, as well as the disagreement over the speaker of Kaveh’s quote, serves as a humorous exchange, but as a motif for communication it acquires a new meaning. The two hold perspectives which contrast the other which puts them on unequal footing, demonstrated within the argument over the speaker of Kaveh’s quote. Although it is not disclosed who is actually in the right, both are convinced of their respective viewpoint. There is an element missing here, a potential solution to this problem, and it lies within the idea of “correctness” established within A Parade of Providence.

The omission of there being an objective, correct answer to this particular debate serves as a parallel to their conflicting viewpoints, with the basis of their exchange being to “prove” to the other their “correctness” – here, it is in regard to Kaveh.

However, “correctness” being the basis of their exchange, and thus, relationship, is challenged with Alhaitham shutting down the initial debate due to Kaveh’s misunderstanding of his meaning. Correctness, then, and its importance, is called into question within this exchange, with Kaveh being the one to chase it; his last message being that he would “prove” himself to be right.

At the core of this bulletin board exchange is the idea that Alhaitham harbours an alternative ‘meaning’ than the one that Kaveh assigns to him: “… you don’t understand what I’m saying to you at all.” This is a meaning which Kaveh cannot perceive due to his current understanding of Alhaitham. This represents the standing of their current relationship, where Kaveh believes Alhaitham holds him in disdain, although this belief is incongruous with Alhaitham’s actions which show his care for Kaveh.

In these instances of communication through the Bulletin Boards, it is interesting to note that Kaveh is revealed to have been drunk and “scribbling” on these notice boards, and hopes that Alhaitham does not know.

Although this is a humorous detail, it adds another layer to the unreliability of their method of communication, as Kaveh has no recollection of these exchanges with Alhaitham, and therefore could not have properly interpreted Alhaitham due to an altered state of mind. It is uncertain whether Alhaitham is aware of Kaveh’s being drunk whilst responding to him, or whether he is believed to have been lucid, which creates another element of unreliability in their exchanges.

Alhaitham understands Kaveh’s thinking and the reasons for why he acts as he does, but he cannot articulate his concern in a way that Kaveh will understand, both out of Kaveh’s incapability of receiving goodwill, but also due to his logical manner of expression. Kaveh perceives Alhaitham’s concealed expressions of concern as personal gripes and criticisms of his beliefs, and therefore believes that their relationship is based on the scholarly principle of proving the validity of one’s philosophies.

The Port Ormos Bulletin Board reinforces the core essence of their relationship: Alhaitham is invested in a personal regard, whereas Kaveh cannot see this due to his perception of Alhaitham and Alhaitham’s inability to communicate in a way Kaveh would understand.

(Update: For more analyses like this, the essay this is taken from is now uploaded! It can be accessed here and here as as a pdf <3)

#i have analysed the other two bulletin exchanges as well!!#but this one has stood out to me the most ever since i read it #alhaitham has expressed to kaveh at least twice that kaveh misunderstands him #this occassion and in a parade of providence with: the issue we’re debating has long since moved on from whos right or wrong #or something of that accord #but will kaveh ever hear this if alhaitham doesnt express this in a way that cannot be misunderstood #also i love the incessant mention in all of the sumeru posts that alhaitham pays for kavehs tabs #not just his drinks but everything on a bill #and whenever they have a clash like this alhaitham drops a month and then picks up every other month #kaveh how are you seeing that he really doesnt have to do that #the line: you dont understand what im saying to you at all is so CRAZY to me and it HAUNTS me because isnt that it??#isnt that the core issue???? or one of them at least plsss they have so many #the essay editing is coming along!! thank you for your patience!! its the longest essay ive written :((#alhaitham #haikaveh #kaveh #kavetham #haikaveh meta

176 notes · View notes

wildflowercryptid · 6 months

Text

the surviving pointer ladies

#wanted to draw some more of the tt cast so here we are #poppy's hair was so fun to draw i love playing w long willowy hair hehe #and oooh miss penelope *sighs* you're haunting me #tried going for a mix of a 50s noir femme fatale and carmen sandiego for penny's on the run look #i actually wanted to give her shorter hair but i couldn't figure out how to make it work well #but the design i just reblogged from otto has opened my eyes god bless #there's... actually some more main character looks that go with penny's that i've been working on #but i can explain that later bc i don't wanna ramble too much lol #detective grimoire #tangle tower #poppy pointer #penny pointer #🎨 : mj draws #tangle tower spoilers

282 notes · View notes

lispenardst · 2 months

Text

sun bleached flies – ethel cain

yes i did make a 6 minute long ethel cain x ft edit

no i am not well

111 notes · View notes

northernfireart · 6 months

Text

if I had a nickel for every time I was hyperfixated on a man with sideburns who wears suits I'd have two nickels which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice

#i am now free that i have drawn this #this thought has been haunting me for so long #david would actually make a good lupin #a great one #they both have a stuck no bitches face #doctor who #tenth doctor #10th doctor #dw fanart #lupin iii #lupin the third #lupin the 3rd #nf art

178 notes · View notes

simcardiac-arrested · 10 months

Text

an understanding [2/2]

(part 1)

#posting this in the middle of the day with no warning or anything. yeah whatever #get this thing out of my sight it has been haunting me for way too long #but i desperately needed to get it out before july so i could actually focus on artfight #i need my ocs erased from my brain. forever #myart #oc: no way back #oc: needless separation #umm don’t know if i should tag the ancients. they’re barely there #whatever. falls on the ground DEAD and UNMOVING #mycomics

202 notes · View notes

basicallyjaywalker · 3 months

Note

Wanna ramble about a moment/character in ninjago you think people need to talk about more?

I don't know who you are anon, but I'm glad you asked!

I am desperate for people to character-analyze Wu. I'm desperate for a lot of character analysis including Nya but since I got a lot of my Nya feelings out with some lovely folks the other night (edit: the other night was a month ago dw about it. this took a minute) I'm going with Wu this time

Master Wu to me is such an interesting case of a character who it is so easy to ignore the bits of the show that hint at his wider issues and traumas. He is a man defined heavily by his family and by his past. A lot of criticism he gets, I think, is due in part to that.

I've mentioned before that I've been rewatching S1 with a friend of mine and intermittently pausing to infodump on them about interesting character things I notice from that season. A lot of that has been Wu-focused because despite having seen RotS dozens of times throughout my life (watching it on CN, watching it on Netflix when only it and Legacy were around, rewatching it with friends) I have only just started noticing the seeds of character written in.

I might also just be reading too much into things, but hear me out

In S1 (and by extension, the pilots), Wu is characterized as your typical old wise teacher. In the first few minutes of EP1: Rise of the Snakes, he is chewing out the Ninja for playing video games instead of training. The line he uses? "Never put off until tomorrow what can be done today."

It's a line that gets repeated throughout the series. In fact, it gets repeated that very episode when the ninja go (pun not intended) to fight the Hypnobrai and a literal pre-teen. At first, it seems to just be a piece of wisdom. Some old proverb Wu's picked up over the years, possibly one he even coined himself. However, in EP7: Tick Tock, Wu tells the story of who, possibly, first told him this.

(Source: Tick Tock/Transcript | Ninjago Wiki | Fandom, highlight added.)

It was Garmadon. Now, I'm not gonna dwell too long on Garmadon, if you spend five minutes talking to me you'll learn he was the first character whose story I obsessed over and I want this essay to be about Wu, but I think he plays a role in Wu's overall story, as does Wu's family as a whole.

Prior to this, Wu and Garmadon's relationship has been more of a sibling rivalry taken to a good vs. evil extreme. We didn't know why Garmadon was evil and we didn't know about Wu and his relationship as kids. However, this scene establishes the backstory. They were, as Wu puts it, "the best of friends." That is, until Garmadon gets bit by the Devourer going to get the katana Wu lost.

Now, I know the Devourer bite was destined to happen because of the Overlord or some shit, but Wu doesn't. As far as he's concerned, Garmadon getting bit was a direct consequence of both his mistake and his cowardice. He lost the katana. He was too scared to get it. Garmadon went over instead. Garmadon got bit.

The scene goes on to show the FSM tending to Garmadon in the aftermath. Wu is watching from behind the door, likely told to stay back, but concerned. And in his POV, we get this intense moment, where Garmadon turns, looks directly at him (his eyes turning bright red for the first time), and says "It's all Wu's fault!"

(This clip should begin at the start of Wu eavesdropping. If it doesn't, skip to 0:58. I highly recommend also paying attention to Wu's body language during this scene.)

The camerawork does a great job of showing how this probably felt for Wu. It zooms in, Garmadon's voice echoes, and the background blurs. We see in the flashback that this is a moment Wu has etched into his memory. Not to mention, he was likely a very young child when this happened. LEGO characters' ages are weird, but Wu in this scene has the Big Eyes, which always seem to be used for characters under 12. We don't know exactly how much older Garmadon is to my knowledge, but he doesn't have the Big Eyes, so he's probably closer to 12 and a few years older than Wu for sure.

Imagine that. Being in elementary school and your older siblings gets hurt. They're acting strange. They're lashing out at your father. Then, they blame it all on you. They're hurt because of you. Wouldn't you internalize that?

I could go on about Wu's relationship with Garmadon, but again, I think I've spent enough time on it and I don't want to only focus on that. It's an important part, but there are others.

Let's talk about Wu's relationship with his dad.

Now, I have not yet read the Spinjitzu Brothers series. I cannot speak to any development of Wu and the FSM's relationship in there. I have, however, read The Book of Spinjitzu and blogged some of my thoughts on it here, including some of what it says about Wu.

For those who haven't read it, first, there is a Google Drive folder floating around with all of the canon spinoff books/graphic novels in it. Here's the link if you wanna read them!

The FSM is an... intriguing figure. I mean, in the series he's basically god? He made the entire world. That's already a very high bar to live up to. Then, in Book of Spinjitzu, there's a few specific parts that, when I read them, signaled that Wu internalized a specific message when he was young.

(Source: The Book of Spinjitzu, Page 3).

Wu does not want to disappoint his father. It is up to him (and Garmadon until he turns evil) to "uphold the legacy of Spinjitzu" and, by extension, his family. He says he was "very young" when this was explained to him. Considering he seems to already be training at an elementary age, "very young" means VERY young.

(Source: The Book of Spinjitzu, Page 16).

Here, we again see Wu being very aware that he has some large burden to carry. Something else interesting here is that the thought of the Green Ninja Prophecy is already weighing on him too. His considering if he might be the Green Ninja is of extra interest because of how the Green Ninja Prophecy and the--I wouldn't call it obsession, possibly fixation?--with who it is factors into his later actions, but we'll get to that later.

(Source: The Book of Spinjitzu, Page 19).

This one in particular gets me because it comes after Wu mentions Garmadon becoming more evil. It is a statement of power. Wu knows that the legacy of Spinjitzu now rests in his hands alone. He cannot let himself fall the way Garmadon did. He cannot disappoint his father. Whether or not the FSM intended it, Wu always knew the fate of the world rested, at least in part, upon his shoulder. He knew this from the time he was a young boy and it remains in his mind to this day.

Now, these quotes are indirect, but they all point to one clear idea: As a child, Wu internalized the idea that he alone is responsible for keeping Ninjago safe. He will play a pivotal role in its history.

There's not evidence in this book that the FSM's was a bad father, per se. However, just because one doesn't set out to harm their children, doesn't mean they won't. I often say Wu has an "Atlas complex," which I have no idea if it is an actual concept but use it to refer to this idea. Wu feels as though he is responsible for holding up the world, much like Atlas. He must keep the balance, he must solve the Green Ninja prophecy, he must make his father proud.

(Source: The Book of Spinjitzu, page 61).

I'm going to get further into what this means for Wu as a teacher to the current Ninja Team, but for now let's look at Wu's first foray into teaching.

Morro. Wu's Biggest Mistake.

That might seem like an overstatement, but it's not.

(Source: Ghost Story/Transcript | Ninjago Wiki | Fandom)

Okay he says regret, not mistake, but I was paraphrasing.

Let's turn back to his quote about his destiny. Wu writes, "Is my life's mission to be the Green Ninja? Or maybe it will be to find the Green Ninja and protect him (or her)??"

From a very young age, Wu was not only aware of the Green Ninja but prophecy but also thinking about his place in it. We see this again when he takes Morro in and trains him.

(Source: Ghost Story/Transcript | Ninjago Wiki | Fandom, highlight added)

A big thing Wu is criticized for here is making Morro believe he is meant to be more. That he is the Chosen One. And Morro, being a young homeless orphan just now given some semblance of power and protection, latches onto that. And I can see it, but when you take into account the above that he was trained from (likely) a younger age than Morro and given a similar level of responsibility, it becomes more understandable. Wu is just doing what he was taught. He doesn't believe that he is harming Morro until it is too late.

youtube

This is the entire story, but I'm specifically going to be discussing 1:36 onwards here. I also wanted to add that rewatching this scene made me lay down on the floor! What the fuck! But I digress.

There's a lot going on in this scene. For one, Wu washing his hands of Morro in some ways, but not others. He turns his back on Morro when he tells him that destiny has decided, but looks at him again when Morro storms out. He goes to save Morro from the Grundal, but decides that he cannot "teach those who would not listen." Most importantly, when Morro leaves to go find the Tomb of the FSM, Wu leaves the door open. He waits for Morro to return, but never goes after him. And Morro never comes back.

Wu gives Morro's fate a dismissive response at the end of his ghost story ("I am saddened he was banished to the Cursed Realm") but it's clear he still cares deeply about him in the finale of the season.

youtube

Wu's VA in this is phenomenal btw. That "Please Morro!" and "MORRO!" make my heart ache.

Morro believed Wu stopped caring, but he didn't. Even after all he's done, even after trying to destroy all of Ninjago--destroying what Wu had spent his life trying to protect--Wu tries to save him. He begs for Morro to come with him. Morro refuses, Wu watches him perish.

Someone else Wu is close to is gone. Wu again considers himself responsible. Everything is his fault.

And finally, we reach Wu today. A cautious, secretive man. He loves his students, this much is clear. Even as early as the pilots, he drops his wise teacher persona to joke around with them.

youtube

As with Morro, he trains them like his father did him. He even uses the same methods his father used when he trains them.

(Source: The Book of Spinjitzu, page 32)

youtube

While he is hard on the Ninja, wanting them to succeed and training them to help defend the Realm, he lets his guard down more than it seems he did with Morro. He also learned a valuable message from his experience with Morro when he hides the Green Ninja Prophecy from the Ninja, getting angry when they start to push themselves in the same way Morro did upon learning about it. It's clear he doesn't want a repeat.

Now, I can't speak for later seasons (I will eventually) but this fear of repeats, his students going down a dark path because they're tempted by power or greatness, losing someone else, likely drives Wu not telling them other important information. That is just a passing thought though.

Final notes:

I'm currently in the process of rewatching S7: Hands of Time. I actually got this ask right after finishing EP68: Scavengers, which opens with Wu having a nightmare. In it, he and Misako are walking outside of Yang's temple. While walking, Misako delivers this line in response to Wu reminiscing about the time they've spent together:

(Source: Scavengers/Transcript | Ninjago Wiki | Fandom)

This line, to me, is Wu's subconscious trying to tell him something he needs to hear. It's hinting at what might be his greatest flaw. Wu is haunted by his past, by his mistakes. He finds it difficult to tell others because of both his guilt and his desire to not put that worry upon them. In this very season, he makes the mistake of trying to face his past on his own, and he nearly dies for it.

In the same episode, you see Wu trying to make sure Lloyd doesn't make the same mistakes.

(Source: Prev)

Wu stresses the important of the team. It's as if he sees Lloyd blaming himself for what happened to Wu, sees him doing the same thing Wu has, and is trying to prevent him from doing the same thing. This is further emphasized when, after Wu falls asleep (well, fakes falling asleep), Lloyd says "Wu's mistake was going in alone. So was mine."

Master Wu is, like many characters in this show, someone who is more complex than meets the eye. He is not just a wise, old teacher. He is a man who, throughout his life, has made mistakes and carries the weight of each of them on his shoulders. He is a man who tasks himself with making up for those every day. He is a man who wants better for his students, his family.

Until the day he dies, he will guide and protect his students. And possibly? Even after death too.

#ninjago #lego ninjago #master wu #long post #anon tag #this made my day i looooooooooooooove character analysis #i know a lot of what i post about it may not encompass the full series but i just think that makes it more fun tbh #i'm working with what i have and later i may come back to this and add even more things #i'm also very passionate about wu analysis as a former wu hater because i think the fact that his character stuff is so buried #leads to a lot of the hate #Why didn't he tell the ninja things? well he told morro things and look how that turned out #he grew up believing the weight of the world was on his shoulders #in one way or another #i won't lie and say the man does not make mistakes #but like i mention in s7 when he does he is fucking haunted by them #he is not breaking the generational trauma but he is damn well making an attempt for someone who probably doesn't realize he has it #p.s i tried to add image desc to each ss to make it more accessible but if i messed it up please let me know!#i spent way too much time on this #somebody do a word count i'm curious but too tired to copy this all into docs #falls over #part 2 of this is just the dark island trilogy but i think i'm gonna wait to do that #this took so long and the words are now refusing to words #thank you for reading #i need to take a nap after writing this I feel physically spent #please enjoy another rook branded ramble disguised as a comprehensive essay #other essayists bring you professionalism and academic vibes #i scream into the void and put way too many links o7 #happy birthday ninjago!!!! i finished this in honor of you hopefully it is worthy

63 notes · View notes

brother-emperors · 1 month

Note

Could I ask for your thoughts on why you say that Cassius should have been Crassus' political heir ?

so largely I’m half referencing this collection of quotes and the various attempts to fill in the space/grave with a body (like Cicero! Cicero was a contender for this!) and I’m sort of taking shots at Antony for fun and whimsy.

like in sports!! I gotta root for my man Cassius over Antony, especially because no one can actually fill the space left by Crassus after his death (literally, the political landscape makes this impossible), but Cassius assumes a command position due to everyone else (notably, Crassus) dying (so: inheriting Crassus’ leadership position) and wouldn’t be a bad follow up to Crassus in the realm of military command since they have a similar (strict, as opposed to friendly in a way is commonly associated with Antony) relationship with the men under their command.

& also bc Marcus Crassus jr seems to be disinterested in taking up space in the political spotlight on his return from the Gallic Wars otherwise I’d be advocating for him on the basis of family tragedy compounded. it’s time to fill the space/memory/grave of your father and brother, buddy!

#no one can actually fill the role of Crassus and after the death of Pompey it’ll be impossible for a Crassus-like figure to exist #because Caesar has redrawn the lines and you can’t achieve the tris homines dynamic with those lines #ALAS. shoutout to Caesar for making things fucking boring. The world got smaller and worse for it and that’s something #you can share with Alexander the Great! along with your allies forming a conspiracy against you. that’s another parallel #I do appreciate Antony as a terrible body substitute for Crassus tho it’s extremely interesting from a Roman Memory standpoint #and also maybe as an examination of Caesar. but also I don’t want to think about any of that for too long bc I have to start #breaking out the olde notebook with all the political alliances and dynamics written down with highlighters and etc #it does make me wonder what Antony’s opinions on things would be but i’d have to construct them from his later behavior #it’s almost compelling enough that I’ll probably do it for a couple of one shot comics focusing on Antony actually. get haunted buddy #a non linear haunting specifically. I’m so mad that once again Crassus has me thinking abt comics for people I do not feel otherwise #motivate to do comics of. AUGH #ask tag

31 notes · View notes

quietwingsinthesky · 23 days

Text

“least favorite” isn’t anywhere close to bad. it just shows how damn hard the competition is going, but we’re talking about gold medals all around for each actor i’ve seen portray the doctor so far.

#and again on acting alone. i think i might prefer him over tennant in the long run.#which isnt saying tenannt is bad either its saying like. i just love them both but i love what smith brings to the table just slightly more.#i dont really put the war doctor on my rankings very seriously because he only had the one rpisode. and it was. a bad episode.#but his performance endeared me enough to him eith his haunted eyes and the weight he’s carrying that i would. possibly with a bias.#put him between ten and eleven.#and then first place depends on the day but i think twelve has pulled ahead of nine just barely. like damn. capaldi Gets It man. eccleston #also Got It in similar ways but obviously his shorter tenure did give him less tjme to show it off and twelve’s gotten three seasons to show #just how fantastically capaldi pulls together this grieving weirdo. this man who loves so hard it burns him up. who is so scared of his own #goodness and losing it. he’s so good guys.#god i cant wait to see where jodie falls on this list im really excited for her take. and mr gatwa too.#and the classic who guys obviously. i mean i already like the guy they get to play One in the audios and im really curious how he measures #up against hartnell(?)’s original performance #i know the vibes will be very different than those of nuwho but im excited :)

35 notes · View notes

carnivalcarriondiscarded · 9 months

Text

do you ever just sit there thinking about your favorite ocs while violently shaking. god. clenches fist. They're So.

#every time a song from their Joint Playlist comes on i go fucking feral #the betrayal the refusal to Let Go the haunting the persisting love the renunciation the resentment the abandonment the resignation #the overwhelming desire to do good vs the fear of admitting you were wrong vs the two people you love most tearing each other apart #AGHHHHH FUCK FUCK FUCK IM SUDDENLY DEEP IN THE ORIGINAL SAUCE #five seconds i was Normal. scribbling welcome home #then One Of The Songs Came On and now im losing my fucking marbles #perceived betrayals leading to real betrayals....#going too far and now its too late you're Committed you cant go back #he came to you thinking he could make you understand and you could work together to make things Better #and instead you ripped his heart out and left it bleeding on the floor for everyone to see #THEY MAKE ME MORE INSANE THAN LITERALLY ANYTHING #absolutely unprompted #the oc Unwellness comes and goes in waves but its the only true constant obsession with my life #god those three... my dearest darling Trio.... how old are they turning this year?#is it year eight of having them? year nine?#one of the two is for sure how long ive had My Specialest Boy Light Of My Life The Reason I Am Still Alive #the other two came after... maybe only mere months after but he was the first and he is just. i love him so fucking much #he is so so personal to me. he has a permanent place carved out in my chest #he sleeps on my ribs <3 #the other day i was reminiscing about his development over the years. his changes his different Versions #and fuck... he's really changed with me huh??#his past selves are echoes of my own self over the years #like he is Very different from me but at the same time. i created him with little pieces of myself sewn in #we hold the same views the same beliefs. im not him and hes not me but we're Kindred yk yk #i think i need to go listen to his playlist.... how long is it now... let me check... 15 hours 13 mins... 228 songs...#my gay 5'2 powerhouse of a guy. him <3 #maybe 'them' too he's played fast and loose with gender over the years. holy shit wait #his development echoes mine... i characterized him as 'fucks with gender norms' long before i realized my own gender fuckery #god damn. i love him even more now. i didnt think that was possible. im going to cry. hes so important to me #he has been with me through my worst years... and will be with me through all the hard times to come <3

97 notes · View notes

bulkhummus · 1 year

Text

do you understand how this rewired my fucking brain ….. they were grad students together…….carlos cant remember decades…we were both trying to prove ourselves… lubelle will march over anything and anyone…… cecils swiss cheese brain ….

#everyone worried about carlos……. enough to go looking for him #im was trying to find connections between dr. kayali in 55 and janet #kayali knew carlos as a professor who disappeared on sabbitical #lubelle knew carlos as a fellow grad student #dr blake knows carlos as someone who made an impact long enough at the university that his portrsit was both hung and taken down #he also took over carlos’ role as lubelles right hand man (implied by cecil stating it )#which means either carlos was not telling the full truth and extent of his relationship to lubelle (highly likely)#or its a time and memory weirdness #but i keep thinking about the line we were young and trying to prove ourselves……..#it sounds so unnecessarily foreboding to me like whatd they get up to what did they do #that made carlos question her ethics #i bet they were rewarded for it #i bet it ate him up inside sitting atop of an achievement that was ethically shakey for years #until he has a break down and dips #also so egotisical that she sets up a campus in town lol and makes herself the dean #on top of sacred ground #kayali said he was gone for decades…… so funny how decades keep haunting carlos what does it mean what DOES IT MEAN #wtnv #welcome to night vale

234 notes · View notes

mobosheep · 10 months

Text

Hellooo have some gay people :DDD

#qsmp #qsmp fanart #qsmp forever #qsmp maximus #this drawing has been haunting me for so long #two drunk gays 💔#the blorbos #they found cellbit's secret wine stash for context #by they i mean forever #he draged max into drinking with him #i wanna do a short comic or fic about this

73 notes · View notes

floofballsammy · 3 months

Text

So this started out as a joke, but then I did an actual drawing a while ago. Here is Purugly's alternate version Puretty.

I had a huge post with Lore I made, but not only is it not even close to finished, it also delayed me posting the actual picture for months. I just want to get it out there. Maybe some day I'll release the lore post, but idk.

#Finally it's gone from my drafts #it has been sitting there for so long #haunting me #anyways here is Puretty #Puretty #pokemon art #pokemon #pokemon redesign #pokemon design #pokemon alternate design #purugly #glameow #my art #Sammy's pkmn art

26 notes · View notes

glowinggreeneyes-e · 5 months

Text

but what was in that ‘William’ letter?

what did the Captain write down, fold away, tuck into an envelope, gently brand with his fountain pen, then place into his breast pocket with the deepest affection and respect only afforded to secrets?

was it a confession? a plea for Anthony to stay? their plans, the Operation, a thinly veiled prayer to keep Havers in Button House? a warning, a reminder, a memoir? a playback of their closest, finest moments together, immortalised for two minds and one piece of paper? did you spill every drop of emotion into ink? or was it laced with that same sentiment as per your diary entries?

was it in your heart as he faded out of the grounds, into the night, into the war? was it on your lips when you saw him again, for that last time?

oh, Captain, what did you write in there?

#did you want havers to ever know what you wrote?#if anyone ever meets Ben Willbond please ask him #this has stuck with me for so long sorry if anyone’s written about this before #all the fanfics and meta can speculate but I need to know what mr willbond was thinking when he made that decision #it’s kinda haunting kinda sweet kinda tragic #bbc ghosts #capvers #captain #havers #writing #the letter #redding weddy #caphavers #s2e3 #james and anthony #s5e5 #meta

48 notes · View notes

pyrriax · 1 month

Note

your centurion anatomy sounds really cool :0! can you describe more in detail about them?

in your screenshot it stated they have a crystalline star in their hearts, does this have something to do with the seraphim? also by "tainted by gold" does that mean centurion blood or do seraphim also have gold blood? what are the different colors of centurion blood and are they all some matter of metallic? how do centurions connect to their seraphim?

you can also talk about seraphim anatomy if you want :3 (im also very curious about why they went extinct but im guessing thats spoilers)

also who are the other centurions and seraphim aside from clown and branzy? do they have some kind of hierarchal system? how do seraphim give their souls to creations since im assuming its literal? and what is the exact purpose of soul-sharing?

no need to answer all or any of these ofc just curious :3

Hello hello yes of course! I'm happy to elaborate more on them ^_^ I'll be pulling pieces from my notes, some screenshots of writing I've done relating to it, and just going into some Details.

(Fair warning this is going to be a LOT of words and a lot of this is subject to change, this project and world is a work in progress and I've been shifting things around as I start actually writing things!)

Preface (A quick rundown of the World itself)

Divided into two parts, the main one I'll be focusing on is The Vesper, Vesper is the name of the main Seraph city, and is also used to refer to the floating islands which are the main home of the Seraphs.

The other part of the world, The Fray, is the actual planet. This is the ground, and was once a lush place, but is currently... Not so much. Once upon a time, it had a handful of different names, but now it's nothing more than ruin.

So, Seraph anatomy (What the hell even is a Seraph?)

Seraphs are an organic bipedal species which are humanoid in nature but tend toward being less human in appearance; though one of the main differences is their many (varying number) of wings, along with having anywhere from two to four eyes. Though, all of these things variy from Seraph to Seraph! In general, they're a bit bird-ish, and though the main two that I'll be talking about look relatively similar, Seraphs have a wide variety of colors and patterns, along with the fact they're known to dye feathers the same as people dye their hair!

(Note: this is an older sketch, before I'd really fleshed out the exact origin of Seraphs. The halo isn't a standard thing, but this does somewhat convey general anatomy! This is a Seraph which is basically showing off what it is, and taking a less strictly humanoid appearance, though it remains bipedal. As well, this is a four-winged example, although its ears are feathered, which can give the appearance of an additional set of wings, depending on the Seraph!)

Generally speaking, Seraphim anatomy isn't too out of the ordinary, although one thing to note is their speech is much more adapted toward chirping and trilling for vocalizations, and most of what I write for the dialogue is more... A transcript of the conversation, than the literal things being said (since I'm already in deep with a worldbuilding project and I don't need to add a conlang on top of that, lol). Well, that's all bar the star in the room, but we'll circle around to that in the next section!

Long before they were known as the Seraphim, Seraphs were a flying creature, and have retained a few key aspects of that, specifically the wings themselves, and a lighter skeleton. This does lead to the high potential of bones breaking, and general injuries, but there are things that circumvent that from being such an issue, which is tied to magic in the world itself.

also by "tainted by gold" does that mean centurion blood or do seraphim also have gold blood?

That line is referring to Seraphim blood! Seraphs have a varied blood color, but the most common one is gold/brass-like, which is usually vibrant but when dried it's much more weathered looking (taking on a greenish hue).

Seraphs are one of two sentient species in their world, and are revered as Gods both for their appearance, and for their abilities. Although, this doesn't mean that they are peaceful, and they often will partake in bloody fights, often to perceived death. Though, these are frowned upon, it isn't outright disallowed, for reasons I'll be getting into! (I swear I'm not dragging this out on purpose I just want to explain what the fuck a Centurion is before we get into magic)

Okay, so what is a Centurion, then? (Centurion Anatomy)

Centurions are primarily humanoid in appearance, but an important distinction to make is that Centurions are not organic. In place of faces, Centurions have masks, which are typically undecorated, left blank to ensure they aren't viewed as expressive or of having emotions. There are few exceptions to this. As well, they typically will have all of their body completely covered, for similar reasons. It's established already in the screenshot you mentioned that Centurions are constructs, and generally speaking, they are made for temporary usage, rather than anything long term. This comes with the nature of their primary purpose, but let's put a pin in that for now.

Despite their status as constructs, they are given pieces which function much like their organs, which primarily exist to be like a siphon for energy and the magic which fuels them. Over time, these pieces wear down, and they will cease to function properly after their designated time is up. This time can be extended, if these pieces are replaced or maintained, but this is something that they cannot do themselves. It was a limitation put into place by their creators to keep them from self-perpetuating and as well to keep them from outliving their usefulness.

These organs appear like they've been made of wood, metal, and wool. This isn't exactly the case, as much of what makes them up is organic material, specifically that of grown stars. (There's worldbuilding and flora explanation I'm not going to drag this out with, but if you're curious I can talk about it more ^_^)

Centurions are nothing more than machines. Or, at least, that's how they were supposed to be, but this isn't how it always remains.

what are the different colors of centurion blood and are they all some matter of metallic?

Centurions have blood much more like humans, though not always. Being variably red or gold, depending on their function. While they are constructs and don't have so much of a need for a circulatory system, this is a bit more... Cosmetic. Centurions with gold blood are more often than not the ones that are made for jobs within Seraphim cities, though this doesn't mean that they always remain there. Although, in rare cases, Centurions may be made without any blood, and instead their organs will be made to replace the few functions it does have.

But, focusing on if all of their blood is metallic, it isn't always the case. Centurions are much more varied, and even from one to another major pieces of anatomy can be wildly different. So, it isn't a far stretch to say there's quite possibly a handful of Centurions with non-metallic blood out there.

Centurion Origins & Purpose (With a little sprinkling of magic!)

So, if you hadn't already guessed it, Centurions were created by the Seraphim! At the beginning, Centurions were made to fill in odd jobs, taking care of things which were necessary and being generally a stand in for workers as the Seraphs progressed. They were modeled after the other sentient species, which are functionally humans but not quite. This was something which caused a fair bit of outrage from them, but the Seraphs didn't exactly care.

Eventually, though, the Centurions took on a much different, and much more... Important role. They took the place of Seraphs in slaughter, in petty squabbles or fights which would've otherwise been an inconvenience. This turned into Centurions no longer being made for small jobs, and instead they were being made as machines of war. They were mindless and soulless soldiers, following orders without a doubt or question.

Although, some Centurions are different from the others: they have a soul, one of the stars. These are the main leaders, and they are the ones which remain for the longest. (This is what Clown is, which is the reason he is the way he is!)

Centurions made for fighting are the only remaining residents of the Fray, and have been the reason for its destruction, after the fall of the Seraphs.

Stars, Magic, all those little things (An some creature details)

Magic in Seraphim is an innate thing, something that everything in the world possesses, but uses in different ways. Some creatures use it for shapeshifting to quickly adapt, others will use it to hunt, meanwhile a handful of species will consume it rather than hunting or scavenging. Although, creatures which consume magic are known to be short lived, and reproduce a lot like how puffball mushrooms do. It's a little horrifying when all of the sudden there are sharp spores flying everywhere, but it's the reason most avoid the main pools of the magic. Seraphs are a species which primarily consume magic, but, unlike the much more nudibranch-esque creatures which are prone to exploding due to the magic they consume, Seraphs have harnessed it for their own purposes.

The Vesper are floating islands which are suspended above vast lakes (which are almost oceanic) and have been held there by the Seraphim. As a means of storing the excess energy they've taken in, they developed a way to use it to continue to suspend the Vesper. These stores could last for several thousand years, assuming they're properly maintained.

But, onto the burning question of the night: what are those stars?

in your screenshot it stated they have a crystalline star in their hearts, does this have something to do with the seraphim?

The star is a key part of the Seraph's anatomy, and is the place where magic tends to remain within their bodies. This is a piece of their heart, the place where their soul resides, and is also their tie to this Godhood they have. Much of the reason they're revered as gods it due to the fact that if the star remains in place, and remains unbroken, it can make them... Somewhat immortal. It greatly heightens their ability to heal, a little like a regeneration potion, if you think about it.

Seraphs are notoriously hard to kill for this reason, given the fact that if given enough time, they're known to be able to sort of regenerate limbs. Not perfectly, and not without several years of time and a high risk of infection, but it's possible. And that's because of the stars. They're almost entities in and of themselves, keeping the Seraphs alive to not die themselves. Although, these stars can survive in other bodies, most notably being placed into Centurions.

So how do you kill the supposedly unkillable, then? What could cause such a mass-dying if they can regenerate?

The easiest and most straightforward way to kill a Seraph is to rip out their star. Although, that involves incapacitating them to some degree (usually via fatally wounding them, as that's generally the most accepted method. This is why it's so greatly frowned upon, as that leaves the Seraph who's been wounded to most likely be killed.) It's recognizable for its shape, which is the origin of its name (for a more visual reference, they're a little like konpeitō, but with a spikier appearance), and though they have varying tones, they're more often than not a pearlescent white. At least, that's when they've been cleaned of blood.

Without their star, the Seraph will die. Even if they we're fatally wounded prior, they will only survive a handful of months at most.

So, this mass dying. While I won't go into all of the details, since that definitely spoils some things, but magic is a finite resource, but even more, Seraphim stars became... Valuable as a weapon. Without the proper maintenance and constant in and out flow of magic, they'll accumulate energy, storing more and more until finally they just explode. Much like the nudibranchs, an excess of this magical energy leads to explosive properties.

This also means that Seraph corpses are dangerous if the stars haven't been removed, which is why in the carnage, there aren't many bodies left to lie and rot. The few Centurions remaining in places like the Vesper cleaned the place of these bodies, and some even took the stars for themselves.

So what do the stars have to do with souls?

In an earlier draft of a concept, I detailed a Seraph getting decapitated and surviving due to its star. The stars are a place where the Seraph's memory, personage, and in the most fantastical sense, their soul, is stored. This Seraph lives, and while it never quite has the same senses as it did before, it is still fundamentally the same person, as its star wasn't harmed in the process.

So; for a Seraph to give a Centurion its soul, that is an act like giving up itself to that Centurion. The Seraph will not exist in the same sense, and as shown with Clown and Branzy, even that will diminish over time.

Although, there is one thing I've avoided mentioning: the humans. Our outliers, as one of the least magically inclined species, they've tried to get ahold of this magic, as well as attempting to use the Seraph's stars for their own. This lead to a few people who've remained, but aren't quite human anymore.

how do seraphim give their souls to creations since im assuming its literal? and what is the exact purpose of soul-sharing?

Seraphim can take out their own star, an act which is painful but to be done for another is a little bit of a profession of love. To give their star to a Centurion, under regular circumstances, it is a way of prolonging the life of their soul. The star is "consumed", a thing which is looked down upon by Centurions, as it's viewed as becoming one with those who've condemned them to their hellish lives.

There are two things that can come of a Seraph's soul being placed into a Centurion, and they go as follows, with few exceptions:

The Centurion is Soulless / a Husk: The soul will continue to live on, but they will start again. It removes all but a few traces of the Seraph's memories, and they will learn to live as they now are. [Example: Ro, who we'll learn more about in the next section]

The Centurion has a Soul / Star (Even if it is one that was grown / artificial): The pre-existing soul will be slowly consumed by the Seraph's, a process which results in one or both of the stars shattering. This can only happen is the Centurion has agreed to it, and it is a thing which became more common as more Seraphs died. [Example: Clown, whose visions of shattering stars are that of his own, and not Branzy's]

Last but not least, an incomplete list of character I've given story to for this AU

Starting with our Seraphim:

Branzy is the most notable as he's the only Seraph who remains a Seraph for his entire existence, even after giving his soul to Clown. Although he's used his magic for shapeshifting purposes, appearing much more akin to the Centurions, as he's been enthralled by them since he was young. Roshambo, although I'll be elaborating more on him in the Centurion section for a few reasons. He was one of the first Seraphs to give his soul to a Centurion, and it had some... Interesting effects.

Onto the Centurions:

Clown is the obvious one, being one of the most perfect example of what makes a Centurion, and being one of the "leaders", his star (his soul) is artificial, one of the ones which was grown, and thus, he's a bit different from Seraph-souled (or, star-eating) Centurions. [Appears a lot like his typical canon appearance, as he was one of the few Centurions who were directly associated with a Seraph, and despite the fact of his origin, he doesn't have the blank mask which is typical of these Centurions. His mask is also carved into a shape which is much more like a horned owl, a little heart-ish; this doesn't affect him.] Zam, a lovely odd case who shows up long after the fall of the Seraphs, but before the Vesper as a whole collapses, who becomes one of the residents of the Vesper's grand library [At least at his introduction, Zam is much like the typical soldier Centurion, dressed in a way which is very impersonal. This changes as he spends time in the library, and by the time of the fall, he's adopted a palette of darker amber hues and white, along with the occasional gold or brass accent. While his mask remained generic for a long time, he eventually allowed Ro to help with adorning it, ending up with a smile and some filigree which matches Ro's own mask.] Roshambo is the last on this list as of currently; although he's fully convinced he isn't a Centurion at all, having been around the other residents of the library since his creation and not knowing himself to be any different from them [Previously being one of the few Centurions who was designated to a space where he would be viewed, Ro is dressed in a way which is almost painfully fancy for him. Unlike the typical blank white, the base color of Ro's mask is an iridescent black, adorned with lavender stripes and laurel patterns. His appearance is a little less decided, compared to the others.]

And last but not least, our... Humans?:

Mapicc is the closest to a normal human of those given one of the Seraph-souls in order to grant him the almost-immortality, this has lead to him having several inhuman traits, including the appearance of seasonally shed feathers, which he's more annoyed by than anything. Spoke is about the furthest from human someone can get while still being so, and this is because of the fact of the star he was given. He was given one of the artificial stars, as a part of a test. He's only become more... Bizarre as time goes on, body twisting and morphing as the magic doesn't know where to go, and he can't fully contain or control it.

The roster is pretty small, since I've been focusing on two different eras, and these two sets don't interact much. Clown and Branzy exist long before the extinction of Seraphs, but Branzy's giving up of his heart does mark the true beginning of the end. Roshambo, Mapicc, and Spoke (later as well including Zam) are the last living beings on the Vesper after the fall of the Seraphs, and are there until the day the sun doesn't set, and the Vesper itself falls from the sky.

... So that's the world of Seraphim, from relative start to end, with much of the fluff, character centric pieces and a bit of the more out-there magical elements cut out to save my damn hands because this is almost 3k words 👍 There are things I'm not sure will remain canon, more proper worldbuilding and flora / fauna exploration I need to work on, and some things I most definitely missed, but hopefully this answers some questions and raises others! there is a lot more to explore post-fall but i have to leave a couple of mysteries, as a treat.

#ask a ghost #asker: citrusinicake #au: seraphim #haunted bookshelf #ALSO i elected to not let myself talk about what disability looks like for Seraphs because i would be here for way too long #just because magic healing and regeneration is a thing doesnt mean that there arent seraphs who Dont recover like that #its actually more common for it to just heal over and instead it's pretty common for those spots to be adorned with symbols and such #lore and worldbuilding things i cannot even start getting into right now i am sending this post and staring at a wall #also please please please if anybody has questions or thoughts let me know i swear i dont bite but i might write an essay in response #ALSO I DIDNT MENTION THE WISPS ACK there are SO many things i didnt include but . auvbnfdjkld #also conclusion this whole post is about 3.4k. erm. youre welcome 👍

14 notes · View notes