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evermore-fashion · 3 months

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Did I make a mistake?

As you're all well aware of I said goodbye to my blogs and Tumblr thinking my decision was final. However after reading all your wonderful messages I started to have doubts about my decision. So for the last few weeks I've been trying to pinpoint why I thought I had fallen out of love with high end fashion as well as Tumblr itself and the answer has been in front of my face for the best part of four years. A broken down friendship that has been plaguing my mental health… until recently and I'm going to finally explain why. I had a best friend for the best part of 15 years that went downhill both slowly and unexpectedly. We met on a forum back in 2005 and hit it off instantly. We then met up and went on various holidays, attended concerts together, did mini weekend breaks away and got to know each other's families really well. More importantly they were the only person in my life who knew about this blog and shared my love for high end fashion. Like most friendships though it had its ups and downs but no matter what we always gravitated back towards one another, until March 2020. A week or so before COVID and lockdown took hold of our lives they told me they had met someone. I was genuinely happy for them, except for the fact they had let slip that I was the last person to know. This broke my heart and their trust as they continued to let slip more details that indicated that I was being pushed out in favour of a new crowd (aka university friends who they had told me they disliked a few months beforehand) alongside their new partner. They stayed with their partner on and off throughout COVID and I was either pushed out the door or let back in depending on their relationship status. The relationship came to an end for good towards the end of 2022 and as always I was let back into their life with plans for 2023 being made. However I held back knowing the hurt it would cause me if things suddenly changed again. This was also my breaking point with them as I wanted to protect my heart from anymore hurt, and I believe this is where my love for creativity began to faulter. Whilst I found my love for gaming I felt this mental block around Evermore-Fashion and Evermore-Grimoire which I thought was down to my passions changing. I was clearly wrong. The friendship was up and down for another six months, until last summer. They had got back in contact with me despite the fact they had started acting cold towards me which manifested in a crap Christmas and Birthday. Yet I was still willing to hear their side of the story, but it never came as they ghosted me and I haven't spoken to them since which hasn't been fun to deal with both mentally and emotionally. Although I now fully believe this is what was killing my spirit and everything I had loved for so long. Anyway fast forward to January 2024, I've said goodbye to my blogs and Tumblr when lo and behold I come across a social media post that changed everything. The ex friend had written something personal that contradicted everything they had told me (over their relationship break up) which not only angered me but it lit a fire under my butt to stop stewing in the "what ifs?" as well as holding on to a small bit of hope that they'd finally apologise for treating me like a piece of shit on the back of their shoe for so long. Not only that but I started to miss why I enjoyed being online in the first place. I checked out Vogue to see what was occurring during Paris Fashion Week and I yearned to share the Spring 2024 Couture collections on Tumblr (even though I still think it's still a toxic cesspit). Yes I could easily start this up on Wordpress or Instagram but let's face it, Tumblr is still the easiest place to start blogging creatively. So here I am. The fog surrounding my love for fashion has lifted alongside the mental and emotional baggage I've been holding on to for far too long. There's just one thing I'm still wondering though… do you guys forgive me (as I feel like I've messed you all around ) and is it okay to come back? 🥹

#Personal #Hello again

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inkskinned · 1 year

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we really didn't get violent enough about roe v wade being overturned. but and also - you're one person. you donated money. you went to the protest. you did what you could, which felt like doing basically nothing.

recently some big paper published an op ed (why did you even read it? you knew you'd get upset) about how it's gross that men can't find a partner because women don't want to suffer bad dates - they'd rather go to yoga class. you actually laughed - well, yeah! and it was funny until it wasn't, because something about it made your stomach churn. this is the thing, you want to say, but you don't have the words for what the thing is. just that men being bad at dating is your fault.

the thing is also on instagram. you don't know if it's a setting or algorithm thing, but these days, the most hurtful comments always seem to skim the top. simple reaction is don't read the comments but - you're human, so you're curious. you want to respond to every weird, sanctimonious one with replaying something a million times to find evidence they're lying about their gender is literally sexual harassment you shouldn't be proud of this or maybe get a fucking life you absolute dickhead but you've gotten into enough of these battles as a kid. nothing ever resolves. it just makes you upset.

your father was radicalized. the thing is - you go to therapy about it and yet never find the words for exactly the way that one hurts.

the other day your sister predicted that a commercial that aired during the superbowl was going to cause trouble. you wanted her to be wrong about that. this morning, while scrolling, you saw someone post exactly that - he got so angry i had to leave. it was terrifying. it reminds you, however bleakly: there are entire swathes of people who do not worry about domestic violence. who have no idea why you would put keys into your fist. who do not understand "it's better to be rude than dead." who have never googled am i being gaslit.

the other day you found out there's a bill that would make it so if you have a uterus and are braindead, you could fulfil your cattle purpose and carry a fetus to term. you think about the fact that the leading cause of death for pregnant people is murder. you think about ongoing and informed consent. you think about how, out of fear, if your ex boyfriend had pressured you, you absolutely would have said yes to it. in the comments, you write there is no way that these documents wouldn't be immediately forged. this is going to be misused. and then just delete it, sighing. get up and go to work.

the other day they overturned roe v wade. we weren't nearly violent enough about it. somewhere, a clock is ticking. it's been ticking a long time. you want to say it's time, but it's been time for a while, hasn't it.

#<3 time to get cancelled on the internet #btw this is trans inclusive author is nb #writeblr #i had a kind of argument with someone about that bill bc he was like ''oh but we do this for other organs'' and im like #okay so like the time it takes to safely extract an organ #versus NINE MONTHS of not having consent . not being able to bury the body.#my family unable to mourn. being used a host.#even if ALL OF THAT was NOT the case.#i do not believe for a fucking SECOND this would be use safely. i cannot imagine a world in which #it was not immediately and with gusto. used to abuse others

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yawnderu · 4 months

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hi, i've only discovered your writing recently but i can't even explain how much i love it 😭 it's like that one anon who i think said that it feels very real, like you're getting 4k ultra hd 8d view of the scene lol 🩷

i really like your bimbo reader posts but i also sort of enjoy seeing them from this point of view that's like.... "this is not his gfs """"constant"""" style but he just lets her be in this kind of persona sometimes because it's relaxing to let him do all the work and thinking for her from time to time".

i hope this makes sense 😭 thank you for writing something that's this cute and wholesome i just love it

Thank you so much sweetheart, this is really lovely!! 😭😭😭<3

Yeah!! I totally get where you're coming from!! She's not exactly dumb, it's actually quite the opposite. I'd like to hc her as a girl who managed to get into a very good university and is studying astrophysics simply because she liked watching stars as a child. She's not dumb— just a girl who grew up extremely sheltered and hasn't seen the world through the eyes of someone who has had a difficult life, like Simon.

There's certain naivety that while it can be dangerous, she's been learning more and more about with Simon's help about stranger danger and trusting her instinct, but the girl is always surrounded by people who enjoy seeing her thrive and always teach her the things that her parents didn't.

I'd say in general she has a very good life, and now paired with Simon, someone whose entire soul wants to see her thrive?? She gets to turn off her brain and simply let him take control— he sometimes picks her clothes for her, dressing her up to the best of his capacity even when he's not a fashion guy.

This man has studied all her Instagram pictures because she's mesmerizing and he loves her that much, yet it also gives him the chance to more or less know what combinations she likes to wear. He still remembers the time she looked at him like he grew a second head for trying to make her wear dots and lines— but he never made that same mistake again.

They work surprisingly well together despite basically being on complete opposite sides of a spectrum, and at the end of the day, they work this well because they're both equally in love with the other.

Simon is level-headed and that gives her the chance to simply be herself without worrying about anything, he gives her a sense of security that she's never gotten with anyone else, while bimbo!reader gives Simon the love and affection he never even dared to think about. The main thing is that she looks and treats him like he's worth something how good of a soldier he is. Hell, she doesn't even know he's a soldier, she simply found the most brooding and intimidating guy and fell in love with him before she even knew it.

They both spoil each other a lot. Simon buys her things, treats her with patience and love, and generally treats her like the princess that she is, while she takes care of Simon like no other. She does face masks with him, gives him massages, does his manicure (trimming and cleaning his nails, putting lotion on his calloused hands), and is overall as patient as they come.

They're a pretty wholesome pair and quite honestly I enjoy writing about them a lot, the love they have for each other is fully pure and it makes me happy. :')

Sorry for going off here HJBEFJBHKFEHBKJEFHBJK I wrote too much but God, I love this pair SO fucking much

Bimbo!Reader Masterlist

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redclercs · 11 months

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DELICATE✰ CHARLES LECLERC.

viii. 'cause I know that it's delicate

— the one where he is rooting for the anti-hero.

❝𝘉𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘮𝘢𝘤𝘩. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢 𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘳. 𝘔𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘴.❞ —𝘉𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘊𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘴

warnings: did somebody say charles-centered chapter? third person pov, hate, mention of last chapter's panic attack, misogyny (i'm sorry!!! i'm going to let y/n have peace eventually i swear!!!) foul language, cheesy taylor swift references, 2.4k words (+articles as always!).

masterlist ✢ next

Can we stop proving Taylor Swift right for once? When she wrote 'My reputation's never been worse' back in 2017 we thought that would be the end of it. But in more recent times (2017 was AGES ago, guys, come on) the lyrics are still relevant and being applied to actress y/n y/ln's life. Her reputation truly has never been worse.

One thing is being called bad at your job. Which, okay, she is not (I am not biased, I'm just not stupid). y/n is great at being a RomCom actress, she has a stylist that sells her well and has good social media presence. Or had, since that's all gone now.

Even if she was lucky enough to really start making it in Hollywood, we can't ignore the fact that for the past two months y/n has been exposed as a really bad person. AND SHE'S LETTING IT HAPPEN!

While a lot of people in social media have come to her defense in the rejected marriage proposal topic, saying she doesn't have to say yes if she doesn't feel like it, others say it's what she 'owed' to Aidan Kim.

Sources, who are still yet to be revealed, have talked to magazines and celebrity sites about her romance with the guy she only sees as a toy. Does y/n have feelings at all? I guess Charles Leclerc didn't like what she said about him, since there were no pictures of them together at the Spanish Grand Prix. Losing your boyfriend and your reputation in the same week must hurt.

But that's not even the main issue here, why is y/n letting all of this happen right in front of her eyes? Hello, girl, speak up! Does she really have nothing to say in her defense?

People are eating her alive and what she does is post her luxurious breakfast in Monaco, Elix cans and Ferrari Special Edition merch. y/n doesn't care what is being said as long as people keep talking about her. You're going to regret this, girl. That's all I'm saying.

For now, let's say goodbye to the 'Queen of RomComs' reputation (2019-2023).

By Bridget Garcia

Matilde Bassi comes in the defense of y/n y/ln after last week's new discoveries on her breakup, a turmoil that has followed y/n for months now.

"She owes nothing to Aidan Kim. She's a self-made woman, and it's frankly disgusting how people want to give her achievements to some man." The former Broadway star said in an Instagram Live on Sunday June 4th.

After comments asked for her thoughts on the rejected engagement, Bassi didn't hold back: "y/n, just like every woman, has the right to say no. It's a proposal, not a sentence. Good for everyone who is brave enough to know what they don't want in their lives anymore."

Matilde hasn't walked away unscathed after such brave statements, people have started to crucify her on social media. Comments go from how she doesn't deserve to keep playing Juliet to how they're glad she lives in Italy now so they can't come across her on the street, Bassi is suffering similar repercussions to that of her beloved friend.

Let's remember Matilde and y/n were seen together in Europe in May, enjoying a short break in Rome before attenting the Monaco Grand Prix, where y/n went to see alleged boyfriend Charles Leclerc.

What do you think? Is Matilde Bassi right, or should she have kept her comments to herself and held on to whatever amount of love the public still had for her?

FROM CHISMETIFOSO ON TIKTOK: "THE FERRARI BOYS TALK ABOUT Y/N Y/LN" PT.1 & 2

[female voiceover in spanish]: ❝Charles went back to Monaco for the week off before Canada, and stopped to take pictures with fans like he usually does. Someone was brave enough to ask him what was up with y/n, besties, you won't expect what he said.❞

[Charles Leclerc, in english]:❝I am lucky to have a woman like y/n in my life, she's an amazing person and a great friend—[cut off]❞

[female voiceover in spanish]: ❝The Carlos video was sent by a fan that met Carlos in Spain, she also asked about y/n and Charles and Carlos assured she's loved by everyone.❞

[Carlos Sainz, in spanish]: ❝y/n is friends with everyone at Ferrari because we spent a lot of time together, I like her a lot she's fun to be around.❞

[female voiceover in spanish]: ❝Well, what do you think besties? Are our Ferrari boys on a PR stunt or do they really like certain actress that has brought nothing but drama to the table since they met her?❞

June 7th, Maranello, Italy.

Charles was already having a bad day before they told him about the PR meeting. Although it seemed impossible, this season's car got shittier every time and it made his confidence drop a little more every time he got on it and failed to drive properly. Was winning Monaco really just a lucky strike like everyone kept saying?

Spain was definitely a whole weekend to forget, not only for the shitshow that the Grand Prix had been. He couldn't stop thinking about y/n's panic attack and the way she had cried in his arms that same night.

Charles is not oblivious to everything that is happening around her, and how it did seem to get worse every time. When he first met her, he didn't think it would get to this point where people who didn't even know her would inflict torture and mental abuse on her all day every single day. And although Charles has been through a fair amount of online bullying as a professional athlete and public figure, it's not in the same way that what y/n is being subjected to right now.

"Are you listening, Charles?" the Ferrari PR manager asks, tapping her fingers in front of him, a few drops of coffee jump from his red styrofoam cup and into the white surface.

He nods, uninterested. Charles couldn't care less about whatever the Elix guys have to say. He sees the way the worst of them, Stuart Schaffer, looks at y/n. Lascivious, filthy. Charles has thought about punching him more times than he would like to admit.

There was a whole presentation on how Ferrari is being perceived by fans all over the world right now, touching on several points starting with Carlos and him, the last three races and finally, the people that surround Ferrari.

"Elix is experiencing a drop in sales, and we believe this to be due to a certain public figure that has been seen around the Paddock..." the Elix representative is saying, pointing at a graph that ends at the bottom of the page.

"Maybe it's just that your drink is shit," Charles' mouth is quicker than his brain, and he knows he's completely fucked himself over by the gasps that run through the table. Except for Carlos, Carlos has to hide his laugh with a cough. "I don't know."

The only reason he drank it so often, even when cameras were off, was because he didn't know what to do with his hands when talking to y/n.

"Charles!" the PR manager hisses. There have been several times in which he has earned that hawk-like look from her, but it still fazes him.

Yet, he doesn't back down.

"If you were going to talk about y/n and blame her for whatever disaster is happening with your company, you should have at least asked her to come. Talking behind her back is low."

y/n's absence didn't surprise him, she was back in L.A. first thing Monday. And although he's glad she's not here to listen to these bunch of assholes blaming her for their mistakes, he wishes she was just to see her, to make sure she'll be okay.

His name is passed through the table again in hisses and warnings, and finally he lets go.

"This is your fault too, kid," Stuart Schaffer has his hand in a fist on top of the table, red blotches coloring his face and neck.

Charles loathes the word kid coming out of his mouth. Him and y/n are of similar age, and she's not a 'kid' in his eyes.

"If you weren't fucking that bitch while she had a boyfriend, this wouldn't be happening."

His ears are ringing and he knows it's his face now that's tinted red.

"Get out, please Charles," the manager intervenes before another word can come out of his mouth, or worse, before he reaches Stuart Schaffer with his hands. "Now."

Charles' veins feel on fire as he gets up from his seat and walks out of the conference room. Biting the tip of his tongue so as not to curse Stuart in every single language he knows.

Carlos makes eye contact with him as Charles closes the see-through door and shakes his head. 'They're going to give you so much shit,' his eyes say. And he's right.

The meeting takes an hour more and he's in one of the offices, buzzed with caffeine and bored out of his mind. He has, regretfully, scrolled down the hell that is Twitter. He's even more pissed off than before, and the caffeine is making him desperate to get out of his seat.

“How bad is it?” Charles asks when Carlos crosses the door.

“A little bad,” Carlos isn’t stressed, he even smiles. “For you mostly. But looking at the bright side, no more Elix.”

No more Elix also means no more money from them. Which won’t make a difference, he thinks.

“Thank God,” Charles lets his head fall down the back of the couch. His nape hurts.

“It also means no more y/n,” Carlos’ tone has changed and he’s looking at Charles with that puzzled look that means he wants Charles to expand on his thoughts.

“She can still come if she wants to,” Charles replies, still feigning tranquility. “I’ll give her a pass.”

And he really hopes y/n wants to. Because all he's done lately every time he goes back to the Ferrari Suite during race weekends is look for her around the room, hoping that she'll be looking at him already. It’s like pieces fall into place when it does. He knows he'll miss her if she's not there anymore.

"Yeah, me too," Carlos plops down on the couch next to him, putting his hands behind his neck. "Do you think she's okay?"

Charles shrugs, an impassive gesture that doesn't reflect the turmoil inside his brain and heart. He is worried about her, and has been for a while. "I'm sure she is, she's back in Los Angeles." They have texted often since he left right after the Grand Prix, but it isn't the same as hearing her voice tell him it's alright.

Carlos stares at him for a few seconds more, thinking his next words through. It's not like he doesn't notice the way Charles looks at y/n every time they're in the same room, he also isn't ignorant to the get-together they shared in Monaco—the one Charles shared zero details about—or what happened in Spain when neither made it to dinner.

But he wonders if Charles is aware of how hard he is falling and what kind of a mess he's getting into.

Carlos likes y/n too, although it took them some time to become acquainted. y/n knows how to throw the exact words at him to tease him, she's brilliant, and when people aren't putting her down, her good mood is contagious. She's like sunshine coming through the curtains on a warm morning.

Yet, it's obvious he'll feel more protective over Charles. He knows it's a mistake to spend so much time on social media, not only looking at what people say about himself, but about Charles and y/n, the cruel lies and twisted truths. He has thought about asking Charles whether he's really aware of the way things look to the outsiders, or how they're tearing him down too.

"What is it?" Charles asks, frowning.

Carlos shakes his head. It's not his place to say anything about his infatuation, if that's what this is. "Why don't you give her a call?"

"Yes, I might." Charles nods absently, looking at his lock screen. Pierre has sent him another link to more news about how he's a homewrecker. Pierre calls him 'loverboy' and makes fun of every new article that comes out about y/n and him. Charles hasn't found it entertaining once.

"Charles," the PR manager doesn't have to raise her voice in the silence of the room. "Come here, right now. Please."

"Told you," Carlos mutters, crossing his legs.

Charles groans and gets up. A reprimand isn't the end of the world when his car gets progressively shittier and luck left him a while ago.

And when he's not sure of when he'll see y/n again.

Charles knows he doesn't need to 'fight' in the name of y/n, or that she even would like him to. She warned him weeks ago that he shouldn't get into the nightmare that this situation is. But he'll be damned if he's going to continue letting people put her down at his expense.

y/n is not a damsel in distress, he knows. And standing up for her doesn't make him a knight in shining armor. It makes him a decent human being and a good friend.

Charles thinks really hard about this, way often. Is it okay that his friend makes his heartbeat quicken every time they're together? He feels like a teenager again, with butterflies flying around his stomach when he thinks about her. Not to mention the fact that he's tried to flirt with her several times, to no avail.

There are many things in the world that Charles wishes he could change. His luck, to begin with. But he really wishes things were different when it comes to y/n. He wants her to have peace, he wishes she'd never had to deal with panic attacks or anxiety induced by hate. He wishes they'd met in another time, when things weren't so fragile and the world could stay away from them, and wherever he knows he wants things with her to go.

And he wishes he knew if he's brave enough to deal with all of it.

"Hello?"

The wave of emotion hits him from head to toe and it takes him a moment to catch his breath. He's worse than a teenager, he knows. Charles has never acted this way before, and it makes him vulnerable in a way he doesn't completely dislike, but isn't comfortable with either.

"Hello y/n," he says, after clearing his throat. "I was um– I was just thinking about you."

There is a pause on the other side of the line and Charles looks at the clock on his nightstand. He did the math to figure out the timezones three times, yet he does it again.

"Hi Charles," her voice comes after a sigh of relief, "Were you?"

"Uh– yeah, I– I just wanted to know how you're doing."

Another prolonged silence and Charles adds: "Is that okay?"

y/n chuckles, "Of course it's okay."

"So, how are you?" Charles continues, anxiously pacing around the room. He wants to ask the right questions. "How's L.A.?" maybe that's not one of them.

"Well, it's Lalaland, what can you expect?" there is movement in the background and then a door shuts. "How's Maranello?"

"Well..." Charles isn't sure if Elix has called her already and he doesn't want to be the one to break the news. "The usual. Praying for improvement every week."

"That's something we have in common," y/n's chuckle comes without humor this time. "But I'm going back to New York in a few days, so that's something to look forward to."

Charles smiles. "Do you need any help with moving?"

"Are you flying from Italy to help me move back to New York?" y/n laughs and her genuineness is back.

"I could, if you needed me to."

He has never felt more awkward in his life, or giddier.

"Thank you, Charles. But I have two suitcases with me, I can handle it like a big girl."

It's Charles' turn to laugh, he has stopped pacing. “Just let me know if you need me, y/n.”

“I think I will.” y/n says, and after some consideration: “Can you stay with me on the phone? Just for a little while.”

And Charles is embarrassingly willing to drop everything and stay on the phone for as long as she needs to.

“Yes, sure,” he replies instead, “What do you want to talk about?”

And they talk about everything and nothing. Silly commercials, pet-peeves about airports, favorite colors and long forgotten songs. It takes more than a little while, but neither care about how much time has passed.

It’s not mental gymnastics realizing he likes her. Likes her, likes her. He feels like he’s inside one of her RomComs; already pining for her. What would the name be? Something cheesy and catchy, like 'Racing Hearts'. He likes it. And hates it, too.

“Y/n?”

“Yeah?” She interrupts her story about the nightmare that Paris was when filming Parisian Valentine, not minding cutting her story short.

Regret comes immediately because he doesn’t know how to fill the silence now, not with the words he wants to say.

That he knows how delicate things are right now. That he likes her for who she has shown him to be and how he is impatient to know even more about her. But he knows he’s probably going to scare her away if those silly words actually come out of his mouth.

“I like talking to you,” Charles says instead. The caffeine hasn't left his system, but he knows the new buzz comes from something else.

“But?” Y/n prompts, he can hear the change in her tone.

“No buts. I like it, I like you.”

“I like you too, Charles.” She says softly, and he pictures the small smile on her face. The one she saves for the times she's one hundred percent comfortable, like when they were at the lake in Monaco.

“And I want you to be okay,”

y/n lets out a shaky breath that makes the microphone crackle. “We are okay, though, aren’t we?” She’s thinking about the tabloids again.

“We are okay. We’ve been on the phone for two hours,” he laughs, and, regretfully, lets out a yawn before he can help it.

“Get some rest, Charlie,” y/n lowers her voice too. “Thank you for staying with me.”

The endearment, although common when people try to be cute to him, sends another wave of giddiness through his body.

"Anytime," he doesn't fight her goodbye because it's a lost cause, especially after he let on his tiredness. "I mean it."

"Thank you," she repeats, "You're a good friend."

Charles smiles, that's enough for now, more than enough for now.

"See you soon, y/n." Charles assures, a smile on his face.

"Goodnight Charlie."

─── team principal radio: ❝thank you for reading! are we loving charles or not? thank you to everyone who lets me know their thoughts and interpretations of Delicate, it's incredibly motivating for me to keep writing and it makes me super happy! if you're a ghost reader, i also appreciate you, but don't be shy to interact♡❞

✰ paddock club members: @sassyheroneckgiant @flowerchild-96 @fangirlika @shegotboreddsoo @roseamongthorns13 @cissyp @chimchimjiminie16 @saturnsrinqs @roni-midnights @gayyvodka6 @studioreader @its-ash-not-grey @lu-morningstar-2 @ferraribabe @reidsworld @feelslikestrawberries @celestialams @kosmosgalore @heeseung-baby @missenclod @buendiabebeta @mycenterfold @aces-tattooartist @burningrred @you-bleed-just-toknowyouarealive @rainybabe25 @ru-kru @lazybot @teenagedreams-cl @cool-ultra-nerd @kuskumu @formulakay3 @bisexual-desi @somanyfandomsbruh @icarus-nex @haziefairy @xjval @xoxoloverb @sainzleclercs @headinthecloudssblog @incoherenciass @bookophiliac @torrie421 @nooshytushie @azxula @steephanie07 @anonymous8462 @tbisloneely @pukklv @bn7921 @be-your-coffee-pot @fdl305 @lovely-blackinnon @landonorrizzz @ruleroftheuniverse @ivegotparticulartaste

want to join the paddock club? click here!

#charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 imagines #f1 x reader #formula 1 imagines #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 x reader #f1 x y/n #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 x you #f1 x you #cl16 fanfic #cl16 x reader #cl16 imagine

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thefallennightmare · 6 months

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Miracle-fourteen

Pairings: Noah Sebastian x Reader

Warnings/Tropes: forced proximity, slight enemies to lovers, slow burn, smut, angst, fluff, mentions of death, and swearing.

Summary: Reader is the merch girl for Bad Omens. It wasn't what she wanted to do with her life but when her mother got sick with Alzheimer's, reader took a job where she could to help with the costs. She thought it would be a one-time gig but the longer she was on the road with them, the harder she fell for Noah Sebastian; even if he wanted nothing to do with her. She needed a miracle to save her mom and her future.

Author Note: Whoopsie daisy.

Tags: @ada-clarence @nonamessblog @thescarlettvvitch @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @theoneandonlykymberlee @yumikitten @blackveilomens @cherrymedicine13 @thebadchic @notmaddihealy @jay02bo @beaker1636 @jakekiszkasguitarpick @punk-pr1ncessxoxo @er3nslovergirl @iamdesolate @lma1986 @jessitpwk @themodern-daywednesday @writethrough @bngurngheart @dreams-that-are-anwsered @loeytuan98 @omens-in-reverse @loverofagoodbeard @jay02bo @niicoleleigh

My eyes held firm on the laptop screen in front of me as I worked tiredly on editing some pictures I've taken the last few days. Bryan sent me over his own and I had plans on posting them all over the Bad Omens social media sites. It should have been done a few days ago but everything with my mom and Noah kind of halted my plans.

Noah.

I tried not to think about what he was doing right now, although I had a pretty good idea. Him and the guys were at their meet and greets. Ever since our fight on the bus about 5 days ago, I had avoided him as best I could. It was pretty easy because I started traveling on the crews bus again which as much as he wanted to know what happened, Davis didn't pry for answers. While Folio checked in on me a few times the last few days, Noah hasn't reached out once. It was stupid to be upset when I could have reached out but I told him I needed time yet he was the one that pushed me away.

Every time we were backstage for a show, I made sure I stayed out of the green room and when I was on stage taking their pictures; I took all of my shots of Noah from a distance. There'd been times our gazes would lock but with him performing, I knew I was safe and he wouldn't try to talk to me.

My phone buzzed on the couch next to me and when I saw the caller's I.D., I ignored it with a groan. This was the third time that Lana tried calling me today and each time I sent it straight to voicemail. She called every day which I only answered twice and kept the conversations quick. I was still pretty upset about everything I found out about my mom so the last thing I wanted was to talk about her. I threw out the excuse that since we were nearing the end of the tour, about a week left, I'd been swamped with work.

It wasn't a total lie but nonetheless, Lana's phone calls became less frequent; until today.

The quiet serenity of the green room was exactly what I needed to finish editing the pictures and uploading them to Instagram. Once that was checked off my list, I opened up another program on my laptop to edit another set of pictures. I was alone in here so I didn't have to worry about anyone seeing these.

As usual, money was getting tighter since I had posted nothing on Only Fans in a while. I was getting new subscribers every day but not enough to keep incoming steady. These pictures were the most risqué I'd done yet; completely naked but my face still covered.

It went against everything I said in the beginning but desperate times called for desperate measures. Lana's final paycheck would be due in a few days and this one was going to be the biggest yet. And that I needed to save some money in order to pay to put my mom in a facility. Even though I was furious with her, she still deserved to have help from doctors and people that knew what they were doing.

With a sigh, I uploaded the photos to my site before idling with my laptop, unsure if my next move should be worth the risk.

"Do you actually want to reach out to him or are you feeling guilty for not knowing about him?"

Folio's voice rang in my mind from last night as I talked with him post show. I asked him if he thought it was a good idea or not to reach out to my brother James. Deep down I knew I wasn't going to reach out to him because I wanted to move on from everything. I wanted nothing to remind me of a past that was all a lie. As soon as I return home from tour, I'd look at some facilities with Lana and we'd chose the best one for me mom. Then I could start looking forward to a bright future.

With Noah.

Quickly I shook the thoughts out of my head. He told me not to bother, so I planned on keeping it that way.

Yeah right.

I placed my laptop back into my bag just as the door to the green room opened and in walked Jolly followed by Nick.

"Hey," I smiled. "How'd the meet and greet go?"

"Good," Nick sat down next to me with an exhausted breath. "I'm hoping to get a few minutes of sleep before we go on."

I patted his knee, understanding how long and draining this tour had been on everyone. "Nine more days and we can all enjoy the comfort of our own beds."

"Until Europe in a month," Jolly reminded as he sat down on the other side of me.

My shoulders fell, completely forgetting about another tour this time halfway around the world. I hadn't thought much about what exactly I'd be doing after setting my mom up in a facility. To be honest, there wasn't anything holding me back from going on the next leg of the tour. The money that I'd be getting would definitely help keep things afloat even when I stopped my Only Fans.

The only downside was seeing Noah for a prolonged period.

You can't avoid him forever, dumbass.

With a grumble to the voices in my head, I sat with Nick and Jolly as we talked for a while until the door to the room opened again, this time Noah walking in with Folio behind. From what I've seen over the last few days, their relationship hasn't soured or was ruined because of me.

Folio tossed me a smile as he ruffled through his bag for a change of clothes while Noah had his eyes glued to his phone. There was a slight tick in his jaw as he scrolled through something and with the way his cheeks reddened, I figured whatever it was, wasn't supposed to be seen by anyone.

But why did he look angrier than flustered? No, it looked like whatever he was looking at turned him on; shallow breaths, flushed cheeks, and I didn't miss the way he adjusted himself as he slid the phone into the pocket of his grey sweats. I did my best not to gawk at him wearing just a plain white tank. I was supposed to be upset with him, not horny.

When his eyes met mine, it was as if time slowed down and my heart hammered in my chest as I wondered what he was going to do. This was the first time in five days that we were this close to each other.

But of course, my stubborn ass had to add more fuel to the fire.

"What?" I raised a brow. "Are you going to accuse me of sleeping with Jolly and Nick now?"

Noah's eyes sliced into me. "I wouldn't be surprised."

"Fuck you!" I spat while rising to my feet. "You're back to being an asshole to me because I said I didn't want a relationship right now? Grow up, Noah."

"All I'm saying is that you seemed to move on pretty fast," he said with a shrug.

I stared blankly at him, utterly confused, however, I never got the chance to ask what the fuck he meant by that because my phone rang; again.

Lana flashed across the screen and I slammed my thumb against the red button.

"I'm going to get some air," I muttered while pushing past Noah, daring not to touch him.

"Try not to get lost in some guy's lap," Noah bit out just before the door slammed shut.

The walk around the block did absolutely nothing to calm the rage burning in my gut or stop the phone calls from Lana. I sent her a text to say I was busy with work and would call her later. I planned on doing another circle around the block but knew I had to get back to the venue because the guys were going on stage soon. I didn't want to anger Noah even more by being late so here I was, fake smile plastered on my face and camera clutched in my hand as I made my way towards the green room.

Previously, I stated I wanted to get a few shots of the guys before going on stage and although angry as I was, I still wanted that.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me," I cursed when my phone rang again.

I was ready to chuck it against the wall at this point however when I saw the unknown number; I gave pause. Something in my gut was telling me that this call was important and I shouldn't ignore it.

Just outside the green room, I answered the phone with a cautious tone.

"Hi, Y/N. This is Nancy Smith, your neighbor."

Oh yes. The good one that understands my moms diagnosis. But why was she calling me?

"Did my mom-."

Nancy's frantic voice cut me off. "Lana has been trying to reach you all day. Something's happened to your mother, and she's in the hospital."

My heart fell into my stomach, pulled down by the guilt.

"Wh-what happened?" I asked.

"She was driving and crashed; the car is totaled. It's not looking good, honey. Lana mentioned you travel for work?"

What the fuck. She wasn't supposed to be driving.

I nodded even though she couldn't see me. "Yeah, I'm in Oregon so it might take me a while to get home. But I'll get on the next flight as soon as I can."

Not bothering to say goodbye, I hung up the phone and stood for a moment to blow out a few deep, shaky breaths. Tears burned in my eyes as I blamed myself. Maybe if I answered Lana's first call, I could have been there earlier.

"Fucking idiot," I cursed myself.

In order for me to leave, I needed to talk to Noah since technically he hired me.

I'd rather chew on a brick of concrete.

With shaky hands but a stern face, I stood taller as I walked into the green room. Bryan, Davis, and Matt were there along with Bad Omens who were all dressed and ready to go on stage. Folio's eyes fell on me and knew instantly something was wrong but I shook my head, not wanting to go into it in front of them. I already decided that I would only tell Noah I needed to leave for a family emergency and wouldn't be able to work the rest of the tour.

Noah was slipping on his jacket as I walked up to him.

"Noah?" My voice was quiet.

Looking over his shoulder, Noah gave a curt nod.

"Uh," I faltered over my words. "I need to go home."

This made him turn on his heels as he scoffed. "What?"

"I have to go home," I didn't dare raise my voice because I didn't want the others to hear.

"Why? Because I said some things that hurt your feelings? Grow up, angel," He repeated my words back to me.

I was in such a state of shock that his pet name for me didn't even register.

"No," I said with clenched fists. "There's a family emergency. I have to go home."

Noah ran a hand over his jaw. "No."

I gawked at him, rage now spilling out every pore on my skin. "Excuse me?! Did you not hear that it's an emergency?"

"If you leave before the tour is finished, you don't get paid. You won't have a job," he shrugged before buttoning his jacket.

The fucking audacity of him. How did I ever have feelings for such an asshole?

An attractive asshole who looked amazing with his jacket undone at the top and silver chain glimmering in the room's light.

"I need the money, Noah."

He leaned in closer, lips so close to mine that I could almost taste the richness of him.

"Then don't leave."

I ground my teeth together. "Two days. Please, all I'm asking for is two days to get things shorted out then I'll be back."

Noah's eyes grazed over my face. "Are you going to tell me why you need to leave?"

With a hesitant shake of my head, I ignored the stares from everyone in the room.

"No, but please understand I need the money. I promise I'll be back in two days."

He chuckled darkly, voice raising to echoing levels. "Why? Is your Only Fans not paying enough? Not surprised with the content you post. I've seen better in amateur porn."

The sound of skin on skin rang loudly in the room as my palm collided with his cheek. His finger brushed along his lip where he bit it from how hard I slapped him.

"Fuck you, Noah!" I screamed.

All sets of us were on us and I knew without a doubt that they heard what Noah had said. His face was still turned to the ground but looked up at me through his lashes.

"My mom is in the hospital. She was in a car accident and might not make it. So do me a favor, keep your fucking money and stay the hell out of my life. I quit."

Not sparing him another glance, I stormed out of the room and away from whatever chance we had to make things work between us.

#noah sebastian #noah sebastian and reader #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian reader insert #noah sebastian smut #forced proximity #enemies to lovers #slow burn

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wavypotatochips · 1 year

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hey, can I request kylian's dating a supermodel and she's modeling for savage x fenty so when her pics and videos of the show get posted online, his teammates jokingly mess with him to try to make him jealous but instead kylian just gets all smug bragging about his gf 😏 he's still lowkey jealous tho but only hakimi or ney notice bc of how well they know him 😂

𝐉𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐥𝐲 | 𝐀 𝐊𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐌𝐛𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲

𝘗𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴: Kylian Mbappe x Female Reader

𝘈𝘶𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘴 𝘕𝘰𝘵𝘦: YAAAY FINALLY MBAPPE RECOGNITION !!!! Mbappe and NeymarJr deserves more requests !! My babygorls <3 Sorry if this is a bit short, as I wrote this specifically in response to your request rather than constructing a "story-like scenario" because I wasn't sure how to build up to this point. c:

I Hope you like how I represent your idea ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚!!

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ♥

Kylian Mbappe is a young and talented French soccer player who has been making waves in the world of sports for many years now. Recently, he has been in the headlines not just for his skills on the field, but also for his relationship with supermodel, Y/N. When his girlfriend's pictures and videos from the shoot were posted online, his teammates couldn't resist teasing him to try and make him jealous.

The team is currently unwinding and rehydrating in their locker room after practice, waiting for the team manager to arrive and speak with them as he promised to do later. Sergio Ramos stumbles onto a Savage x Fenty advertisement while relaxing and scrolling through Instagram. He smirks as he realizes that you, Mbappe's girlfriend, are the lady in the picture. Other than Hakimi, you haven't met the team yet because your modeling schedule prevents you from attending his games. Yet, he always shares pictures of the two of you online, so it's clear that he knows you exist. "Watch this," he murmurs, nudging Kimpembe. “Damn Kylian, is this what you'll be seeing when you come home?,” Ramos says while glancing at his phone. Kylian raises his eyebrow in confusion. Ramo flips the phone around so that the other teammates can view in addition to Mbappe. It's a picture of you on a bed wearing red lingerie for the brand. Kimpembe, who was aware of his plan, joined in by saying, "Y/N is fine as ever, why don't you let us meet her?" Verratti throws his arm around Mbappe and pokes his cheek while saying, "It's because he knows I can take her away,"

Mbappe felt a burning anger rise inside him as he listened to his friends hitting on his girl. He could feel their eyes lingering on her body, their words dripping with thinly veiled flirtation. It was enough to make him want to lash out, to tell them to back off and leave her alone. But he knew he couldn't do that. He couldn't let his possessiveness show, not in front of his friends. He had to keep up appearances, had to act like it didn't bother him, even though it did.

As he releases Verratti's arms, Kylian makes a phony laugh, saying, "She has a height restriction, you have to be 5 '10." Verratti, who is barely 5 feet 5 inches tall, playfully pouts and walks away. The boys laugh as Kimpembe says, "6' 0 is better thought," and daps up Ramos as they are the same height. They were all taken aback by Kylian's response, though. Instead of being unhappy, he grinned from ear to ear and began boasting about how gorgeous and wonderful his girlfriend was. Kylian shakes his head and says, "She's so beautiful right? I can't take my eyes off of her that's why she hasn't come around during the games ," maintaining his phony smile. He tried to focus on other things, to distract himself from the uncomfortable feeling that was building inside him. He laughed at their jokes, made small talk, and tried to act as though everything was normal. But it wasn't. He felt like his friends were trying to stake a claim on something that was his, and that made him feel vulnerable. It was one thing to be jealous of a stranger, but when it was someone he knew, someone he trusted, it cut deep.

Once more, Sergio torments him, "You need to bring her next game so she can meet me. I'll show her what a real man is like."

“Trust me. You can't handle her like I can," he remarks, hinting at something sexual. Despite his smugness, Kylian was still secretly jealous of all the attention his girlfriend was receiving. He didn't like the fact that his teammates were constantly talking about her, but he didn't want to let them know that it bothered him. Only his best friend Hakimi noticed that Kylian was feeling a little lowkey jealous. Hakimi knew Kylian so well that he could see the subtle changes in his friend's behavior.

Hakimi tries to divert the conversation by saying, "You are so focused on Y/N like you did not get nut-megged and scored on by Neymar during practice." He did so successfully as everyone started to laugh and point at Ramos, some of the players even walked up to him and slapped his head. Mbappe was aware of Hakimi's actions and mentally praised him. Mbappe didn't want to seem possessive or insecure. He wanted to be the confident, easy-going guy that everyone knows him to be. So he kept his feelings to himself and tried to be the bigger person. He knew that his friends didn't mean any harm, that they were just being friendly and playful. But he couldn't help feeling like they were crossing a line.

You have always loved Mbappe's extreme possessiveness toward you. If you had been in the locker room, you would have been impressed by his ability to control his emotions.

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ohmyeyesmyeyes · 1 year

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beef with wasps

f!singer x andrei svechnikov

warnings: mentions of anaphylactic shock/severe allergic reactions, swearing, light joking of near death (to be clear: nobody dies in this), some fluff

liked by gracieabrams, rolemodel and 836,217 others

ynofficial: on behalf of y/n - she is conscious, well and in great hands. she told me to spare the details on what happened, but does want you guys to know that after suffering a wasp sting earlier this afternoon, she was rushed to the ER after going into anaphylactic shock. she gave us all quite a scare and will be in overnight for observations, but doctors are positive she'll make a full recovery

S x

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gracieabrams: thinking of you and wishing you the best recovery! <3

fan1: who tf is s?

fan2: that must have been terrifying, so glad she's ok now

fan3: sending love

reneerapp: ❤️❤️

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liked by olivia_dejonge, haleyluhoo and 921,375 others

ynofficial: they gave me so much fucking adrenalin i have a rocket up my arse rn and he's just gone to the vending machine bc im so hungry so im taking this opportunity to tell you guys that i almost died today but im ok and the reason theres no selfie is bc i look like a pickled dick rn and as charles boyle once said life is a party and im the pinata xxxxx and he did get me flowers without me even asking so im vv in love rn

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fan4: sorry you almost died?????

fan5: babe what did you think anaphylactic shock was

fan6: does the adrenalin also increase the meme usage

fan7: so she almost dies AND reveals she might be in a relationship??? my heart is breaking twice tonight

fan8: ok but the flowers???? she's got a real one there

fan9: i mean i'd like to think if you almost died your partner would get you flowers...

fan10: lmao you'd think so wouldn't you

liked by andrei_svechnikov37, madisonbaileybabe and 926,174 others

ynofficial: back home! i'm now on house arrest because "there aren't any wasps inside" (we have beef with their butts now). needless to say, it was scary for everyone, but as you can see, miley (the cat) is the only one unbothered. i'm currently typing this from under a human giant and i'm loving every second.

i'd also like to take the opportunity to apologise for my loopy instagram posting and let everyone who purchased tickets for the phoenix show know that they will be refunded. again, i'm incredibly sorry for any inconvenience!

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fan11: and you expect me to believe that human giant in the photo is NOT svech???

fan12: he also likes cats

fan13: and in her other post, it was signed off with 's'

fan14: girl don't apologise

fan15: is he ok?

ynofficial: bit teary but we're recovering!

fan16: NO SVECH DON'T CRY EVERYTHING IS OKAY

andrei_svechnikov37: ynofficial you almost died i'm not letting you go that easily

fan17: SVECH HELLO

liked by ynofficial, devonleecarlson and 57,931 others

andrei_svechnikov37: the family emergency has made a full recovery! (thank fuck) i also wanted to come on here and say that i'm unbelievably proud of this girl, and hilariously in love with her

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fan18: crying happy tears this is adorable

fan19: SVECH STOP RUINING MY STANDARDS

fan20: i love how she's wearing red in the last two pictures

ynofficial: shh he hasn't caught on yet

fan21: i've only had y/n and andrei for a day (officially), but if anything happened to them, i would kill everyone in this room and then myself

fan22: am i the only one who wants to know how long they've been dating?

fan23: no!! i do too

ynofficial: you're making me blush

liked by andrei_svechnikov37

fan24: y/n is so precious and idk who andrei is but i love him just for this caption

fan25: svech is definitely a cuddler

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liked by andrei_svechnikov37, sydney_sweeney and 1,028,285 others

ynofficial: i can't find the right words to express how happy and grateful i am to have you in my life, so i'm just going to settle with i love you so fucking much that sometimes i can't breathe because of it, okay?

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fan26: is andrei the inspiration behind out of my misery?

ynofficial: yes

fan27: you guys make me sick in a good way

fan28: wow you've got taste y/n

andrei_svechnikov37: saying you can't breathe is a bit too soon

ynofficial: LMAO I DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE

andrei_svechnikov37: i love the love though

fan29: y/n i can't-

fan30: how long have you guys been together?

ynofficial: one and a half years!

fan31: y/n not being overly mushy on instagram and casually announcing she's dating an nhl player is my favourite part of this year so far

#andrei svechnikov x reader #nhl social media au #nhl fic #nhl imagine #hockey fic #hockey imagine

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luvgavii · 1 year

Text

the damage is done. (part 2)

summary: almost one year after breaking up, you and gavi see each other again. did you two lose feelings completely or will you work it out?

!!!part 1 here!!!

365. It's been almost 365 days since you have last seen Gavi in person. Of course, you saw him on TV whenever Barcelona was playing, or when you scrolled your Instagram. Hell, you even imagined seeing him on the streets that you two once walked on hand in hand.

Now, when you were almost over him, he was standing in front of your door, begging to talk to you, his brown irises pleading you to let him in. And you were weak because you let him inside your apartment, and with this small act, you also let him back into your life and heart.

You sat at your small dining table, Gavi in front of you, studying you intensely. Pablo hasn't seen you in almost a whole year, so he started studying every facial feature of yours. Your hair was shorter now, he concluded, but your face was still as beautiful as he remembered. You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, unsure of what to say or do.

"So how is football going?" You asked him putting your chin in your hand and looking at him, but you knew how his career was going, you were still watching his team play, on TV, whenever you had time.

"It's going good." Pablo nodded and paused.

You would lie if you said that it didn't hurt you that he didn't call or text you for a whole year. You two still followed each other on social media, but after you saw him with that other girl in his apartment, he never reached out.

"I was in a few countries around Europe, some for The Champions League and some because I wanted to travel." Pablo continued.

"Really?" You lifted up in in your chair and leaned closer on the table. "Tell me more." You gave him a small smile.

Gavi was glad the tension had dropped and he leaned on the table as well, almost touching your hand if you wouldn't have pulled it away.

"Well, Italy was stunning. I think you would have liked it there the most. The people, the culture, everything was amazing." Pablo looked at you, you had your head tilted a little bit to the right, looking at him.

"Yeah, I've seen the pictures you had posted on Instagram while you were there." You nodded.

"You never liked anything, started thinking you unfollowed me on all social media." Gavi put a hand on his heart jokingly.

"Was thinking about it." You said with a straight face. "Can you blame me tho?"

"No." He admitted. He was aware he screwed up. "The whole time I was in England it rained so there wasn't anything to do except going to the match and then back to the hotel."

You let out a sigh that you didn't know you were holding in. "How do you even have the balls to come here and act like nothing happened? You didn't reach out to me for a fucking year, Pablo." The sudden change in your attitude took Gavi by surprise. But yet again, he couldn't blame you.

"There wasn't anything to say."

"There wasn't anything to say?" You started raising your voice. "You texted our mutual friends, maybe not daily but surely weekly. You spoke to all of them but me. Hell, did I mean nothing to you?"

"Of course you did. You still fucking do." Gavi raised his voice too. "I know you and Pedri have been texting. I asked him about you every damn time I got the chance."

"Oh, because that makes it okay." You crossed your arms and fell back on the chair. "You always were an asshole, Pablo Gavi."

"I had a career to focus on and things weren't good with us. I couldn't focus at training because we were always fighting and I was always tired to give you the attention you needed, I know what I did was wrong. But all I needed was time to sort shit out in my head. I never stopped loving you, Y/N." He grabbed your hand and put it between his, making you look at him. "Leaving you was the hardest thing I have ever done. But leaving you taught me that there is no one else I would rather be with."

"I know that we weren't in a good place. But it really hurt me to see you with someone else, in our old apartment, so soon after we broke up." You pulled your hand away from his, one more time.

"Look, I don't know what to say to make this okay, alright? But even if I would have texted you, both of us know you would have been salty as fuck."

Gavi was right.

"Fine." You put a piece of your hair behind your ear. "You're here now. Let's try and be friends."

"Me and you? Friends?" Gavi laughed. "Amor, me and you will never be just friends." You wanted to wipe that smug look off of his face.

"Well, we will be." You crossed your legs.

"You know that's impossible. I did think a lot about you for the past year, Y/N. After you saw me with that girl, I couldn't get myself to date anyone because I kept looking for you in every girl. I wanted to come to your door every time you posted a selfie on your story or whenever you posted something."

You didn't know what to say, you just looked at him. Your heart and brain told you two different things, but you listened to your heart and went up to hug him, nuzzling your face in his chest while he held you close against him and smiled into your hair, thinking how much he had missed having you so close to him.

"I missed this." You sighed not wanting to let go, but you were ready to have him fight for your love, because he wasn't going to get you back so easily.

"I missed you." Pablo said back.

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little-cereal-draws · 5 months

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Details I noticed in Nimona pt 5

It was mentioned in this post on Instagram that Nimona was there in the crowd before the knighting ceremony. A person blocks her from view for a second and she emerges on the other side as a rat

In the video clip the news anchors play of baby Ballister hopping the fence, the Queen is there. She's sitting in a booth on the bottom right of the screen so she's slightly blocked by the crowd watching the news but she sits forward as Ballister runs in. The Director is in the upper right as she leads the class

During Ambrosius' introduction, there's a clip of him taking a selfie with a kid in the Glorodome. There are two men wearing red coats behind them who hug/lean into each other in a very couple-y pose. Are gay relationships ok here?

Ballister smiles when Ambrosius calls him "thinky face." At this point he hasn't even looked at him yet but Ambs can still make him smile

The knighting ceremony must have been done in alphabetical order by first name because that's the only way you would get Ambrosius and then Ballister right after each other

Ballister is definitely bleeding after the jumbotron falls. It looks like dirt in the shadows but he's got a huge scrape on his forehead that is red in the light

There's a reflective piece of glass or metal right by Ballister's work bench. You can see his reflection in it as he makes his arm and then Nimona's reflection as she sits in the chair, playing with the knife

The papers Nimona drew her "resume" on have the Institute logo on them. Somehow she got ahold of Institute letter paper lol

Everyone likes to talk about the symbolism of the eye highlights so here's something interesting. In the scene where Nimona declares herself his sidekick, Ballister's eye highlights are the same shape as hers. His highlights go back to squares in the next scene

A nice bit of character acting- Ballister holds his wounded shoulder as the knights shove him in the holding cell

I know people have already pointed out that you can see Nimona as a rat as the Director leaves his cell but there are also normal rats and you can hear them squeaking

Ballister's prosthetic has a ball at the top of it that mimics the ball and socket joint of the shoulder. That means that it would need something to attach to. He’s probably got a metal bit on his torso that the ball has to go into to be able to have the full mobility of a shoulder. Meaning… Ambrosius took off his arm and a chunk of his torso

As they’re walking past all the knights Nimona beat up during the jailbreak and she says “They were like this when I got here,” there’s a knight stuffed inside the vending machine and a sword sticking out of the filing cabinet

When Nimona’s cooking the mushrooms for the breakfast tacos, she breathes fire on them but her back is to the camera so that ability is still a surprise to the viewer later. You can tell it's her though because her fire is orange and the fire from the stove is blue

When Ballister takes the arrow out of Nimona's leg, she's sitting on an old car seat(?) and he's kneeling on the ground next to her with one leg up. He's got her injured leg resting across his knee. Idk maybe ppl already knew that but I always thought he was sitting on the seat next to her

The knight that Nimona points to when she says, "He just peed his armor, he peed his armor!" is the otter knight with the cast on his arm (rip that guy lol)

The Institute has a motto that's four words in Latin. It's on the Insitute's logo but is most visible when the Director does press conferences. It reads, "Trad?m?? Securitas ???????? ???????" (The bottom two words get cut off by the podium) I'm pretty sure it translates to "Keeping our way of life safe" which is the tagline on the picture of the Director Ballister has on his murder wall

After the Kingdom rebuilds, there's a shot of hover cars going in and out of the wall. On the wall, they've laid the stones to make a phoenix pattern

When Ballister hangs up Nimona's headphones when he's cleaning up the tower, her sunglasses are hung above them

pt one, pt two, pt three, pt four

#nimona #nimona movie #nimona 2023 #ballister boldheart #ambrosius goldenloin #the director #queen valerin

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ego-meliorem-esse · 1 year

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Public Figures AU

The fantastic and very fuckin funny @sunnylolli reminded me of my own au where the countries are public knowledge and people have known about them for a while.

In my au the countries have been public knowledge forever. In my humble opinion it's very hard to hide immortal being from humans. There would be too many questions, too many stories and too much effort in hiding such a thing. The public is used to them and treats them like any B-list celebrity

ALFRED IS MADE FOR THE SPOTLIGHT! That boy is so comfortable in the spotlight its actually an issue. He posts so regularly on social media that one could consider that one of his hobbies. Being that famous of course, he can't really work for NASA or have a normal engineering job (like in my regular universe) so he has a big social media presence. Be that instagram, twitter, tiktok, youtube or even twitch.

Alfred streams on twitch with Gilbert. They play some FPS and talk about some historical event completely unrelated to the game.

Arthur has a personal instagram account where he only posts pictures of his garden, his books an his kids. Every once in a while he posts a picture of Zee or Jack while they were younger during the victorian era in those frilly dresses and one of them will just be like: "dad delete this or im rebelling"

Arthur is active on facebook and so is Francis

Francis only follows cooking channels, fashion blogs and philosophical content. He constantly endorses brands and takes part in commercials for Vogue, LV, Dior... He is a sort of sponsor/face for some brands and is asked to promote them online. You'll see his face in every third magazine and fashion articles follow him on a regular basis.

Matt is the one who avoids the spotlight the most. He will answer interview questions and do a QnA on tv or youtube but will hybernate for the rest of the year afterwards. He is also the one who is most secretive about where he lives. De has a huge fear of doxing himself and wants more than anything to keep his privacy. In my universe Matt is still a doctor and has a clinical doctorate in medicine but can't work as one due to being a sort-of celebrity. That's why he still gives lectures on college campuses and publishes papers regularly but doesn't work in any clinic or hospital.

Smaller countries have an easier time with fame and being public knowledge. They can walk around in their own countries on the street and pass of as a normal human being while, for example, Alfred has a harder time doing the same. Being himself, he is lucky he hasn't doxed himself yet and doesn't have paparazzi follow him from his home to work.

There are some meetings held by personifications that are broadcasted to the world to see and people online make compilations of cringe and funny moments during those meetings. (That would be my fat ass in that au)

"10 minutes of Francis being himself at the UN" the youtube video

Countries are often asked to help and aide with the makings of history books and are often cited as a source at the end.

Countries are legal citizens and have rights. Not all rights but the ones that the do have include: right to life, right to freedom from torture and inhumane treatment, the right to equal treatment before the law, the right to privacy, the right to freedom of thought (religion, opinion and expression), the right to work, the right to education, the right to social services... While not having certain rights like the right to marry but all the while having a right to have a family.

Gilberts diaries are considered a valid source of historical information unfortunately for us

I have so many more hcs for this au holy shit

#hetalia #meli speaks #hetalia au #hetalia public figures au #historical hetalia #hws america #hws canada #hws france #hws england #hws prussia #another universe #god damn i cant tell you how long ive had this au in the making #this might be lame but it came straight from the heart

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kaksparkz · 7 months

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𖥻 REDRAW of my fav bisexual videogame men trio 🩷 (its true btw capcom and konami told me themselves)

RAIDANTELEON NATION RISE UP‼️‼️

redrawing this made me realize how much my art has developed since i posted the og one. hell, it hasn't even been a full year yet!! (・・;)ゞ

i know there's still a lot to get better at, but i'll get there. maybe i'll make redrawing this a yearly thing so,,, i hope y'all stick around to see the next one 🫶

my Instagram / Twitter in case u wanna check those out (´ ∀ ` *) i'm way more active over there!!

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shiroyamaberserk · 8 months

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Making a fan manga of Locus

Almost all of Berserk fans would have once had this question; "How this guy became an apostle?" Yes, so have I.

Locus is my favorite villain from Berserk. He is noble, loyal, and one of the strongest apostles. He hasn't lost his spirit as a knight even after becoming an apostle. That's why I love him.

His backstory is still hidden. We don't know how he became an apostle. I decided to depict what I imagined for his past life in manga. This is not an official, but I believe it has a reality as one episode from the world of Berserk.

I started this manga around the end of 2021, then have been posting the panels on Instagram. It has not been finished yet, but you can read all the pages I drew until now in my account; https://www.instagram.com/shiroyama_berserk/

When it is completed, I will post all the pages in tumblr too.

#berserk #kentaro miura #japanese manga #berserk manga #behelit #apostles #god hand #slan berserk #locus #locus berserk #ロクス #sir locus the moonlight knight #月光の騎士 #fan manga #berserk art #berserk fanart

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louscartridge · 10 months

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⇢ ˗ˏˋ Hannah bahng x fem reader

Cw- angst if you squint, kissing (nothing suggestive), reader and hannah say 'ily', reader calls hannah 'love' and 'baby' once. Not rly much at all tbh, just fluff <3.

Summary- hannah doesn't want anyone to hear her song until it's out, including you, and you just can't leave hannah alone about it when you're supposed to be sleeping.

a/n- someone please send rhis to her on twt or something 💀. I wrote this the day hannah announced her song but I just haven't posted it until now. Idk why 😭 also some of this was written on a phone and some was written on a computer so sorry if it looks weird.

God do you love Hannah. You love everything about her. Literally. Especially the small things. Details, stuff that any other person wouldn't notice about her.

Physical things, mental things, emotional things.

You obviously love the things about her that the average person crossing her on the street would notice about her too,, But there's just something about being so close to her, knowing things about her that no one else does. Being able to notice things about her that no one else does. Being able to notice things about her, without her even telling you things. You love knowing that you will always know her more than anyone, no matter what.

She's so cute. the way her eyes and cheeks puff slightly when she laughs or smiles real hard, the way she side eyes you when she sees you hanging out with Chan or berry over her, the sarcasm that you guys share, even if over the smallest of things. and while she claims to be the mean sibling, she swears she's the nicest girlfriend. You could confirm both of those. However, it then makes you sound like you're a mean girlfriend. It's not that you're mean per say, you just aren't good with your feelings and Hannah's always been better at expressing them to you then you are to her, or anyone, for that matter. If anything, Hannah's the easiest person for you to express your feelings to.

You're also insanely proud of her. Proud of her for everything. She dyes her hair? "oh my god, it looks so good baby!! Good job." she makes food? "oh my god, this is so good. Good job, for real"

You were especially proud of her music skills.

Shes pretty humble about it, which is cool, but sometimes you just want everyone to know how actually talented your girlfriend really is. Scream it. Scream it together.

However, you haven't heard her official, original, one and only, debut song yet.

Of course you've heard her sing other songs and play the guitar, piano, and what not. between her YouTube covers and what she does for you, you'd argue that you hear her music abilities more than anyone.

But you haven't heard this one.

None of it. Not the lyrics, not the instrumentals, nothing.

At first you were kinda upset that she won't let you hear it, but you respect her boundaries. Plus, knowing that Chan hasn't even heard it yet either made you feel better.

She's told you that it's nothing personal, especially with you. she just doesn't want anyone to hear it until it's put out. And anyone just so happened to include you and her brother. Plus, she valued yours and chans opinion greatly. She figured that if either you or Chan didn't like her song somehow or something, that she wouldn't go through with releasing it. Which she really didn't want to do, considering how long she's spent on making just this one song.

Once she knew when it was going to be released, she told you when right away. You and Chan were the first to know that, along with her parents. Or maybe she would make you wait, let you see the timer she posted on her Instagram story, and watch you go insane. Until then though, you would be the most impatient little fucker ever.

It's was now around the time you and Hannah usually end up falling asleep during a move or something, but tonight you just would not leave Hannah alone.

"I'm actually so exited. I'm not even trying to be funny, but I don't think I can wait like a month." you said, laying next to Hannah on her bed.

She was laying on her side, facing away from you, and you were laying next to her on your back. The two of you originally started out with spooning, but you soon got relentless and started moving, which ended up changing your original position.

"well your gonna have to." Hannah sighed.

You sat up so you were now leaning back on the headboard and looked over Hannah's shoulder. You can see a slight smirk on her face, but you can also tell she was slightly annoyed.

"yeah but like what if I CAN'T."

"you will. You'll be with me for the whole time, and we're going to a concert soon. Time will go by fast." she tries to convince you.

You bring your finger up motioning as you speak. "yeah, OK, but you see-you say that, but really-"

"oh my god" Hannah groans, knowing that you would just keeps going on and on in continuous circles. you frown and her words and tone of voice, upset at yourself for making her annoyed, especially when she's trying to sleep, and you feel bad for your obnoxious behavior.

she turns her body around so she’s facing you and leans up so she can kiss your lips. “Shut up” another kiss. “and go to sleep” another kiss.

Your mood quickly goes up again just from feeling the touch of her soft lips against yours, and the fact that her voice has softened again. Her voice is teasing and you can tell she's slightly annoyed still, but she's more in awe of you then annoyed.

Hannah scoots back down into the bed and clings onto your leg and your waist/hips.

Hannah looks up at you and says “Goodnight. I love you” with a smile on her face, teeth showing slightly and the underneath of her eyes get slightly puffy as she smiles at you. Because of you.

you look down to her and reciprocate her smile and words back to her. “Goodnight. I love you, and I’m beyond proud of you.”

Although it's dim in her bedroom, you can see from the slight light that Hannah blushes at your words. “I try my best to make you proud.”

“hannah, you don’t even have to try.” “I’m beyond proud to be able to call you mine too”

Hannah’s blush gets more intense in response to your statement. “Always love.”

Reblogs are greatly appreciated ♡

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thebroccolination · 3 months

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Make Sure to Double-Check Labels

I've seen this phenomenon a lot in Thai BL fandom over the years, so I just wanted to make a very gentle post to encourage people to always check their sources before using a sexuality label for anyone.

If someone hasn't given a label, I think it's best to respect that. Please don't give them one.

If your favorite actor is a cis man who presents himself with a feminine flair and has previously dated men, you may see people referring to him as gay. But before you follow suit, please look into whether he's actually used that label for himself.

There's a very fine line you can walk thinking, "Oh, but I can tell," before you jazz-hands yourself into the world of stereotyping.

My go-to example for this is Earth ("Cooheart"). My information might be out of date, but the only label I've ever heard directly from him was on an Instagram live where, if I'm remembering correctly, someone asked if he's gay. He said he's "LGBT." Yet, there are scores of fans who have been casually calling him "gay" for years ever since before I joined the fandom. Maybe he is, maybe he isn't. Maybe he used that term at some point. But as far as I know, he hasn't, so I just call him queer. (And that's only because calling a person all four letters of "LGBT" isn't something we do in English. It's more commonly used in Thai as a loan word to mean "queer" from what I've been told by friends who speak Thai.)

A more recent example is Supanut. In an interview, he said he dated a girl he met online when he was about thirteen or so, then he dated a boy when he realized boys could feel attraction to each other, and then later a man. Supanut didn't use a label for himself, and yet people have started calling him "Bi King." There are plenty of gay people who have dated other genders for various reasons, there are ace and aro people who realized their orientations later. The point is, unless Supanut himself gives a label, the fact that he dated a girl, a boy, and a man only means that he dated a girl, a boy, and a man.

On the other side of the labeling, Krist is called straight pretty universally, likely because he blew up on an IG story once and denied being gay after people kept harassing him to come out as Singto's boyfriend. However, as far as I or any of the long-term fans I've spoken with about it know, Krist has never used any label for his sexuality. The closest I've seen are when he answers "what's your type of girl" questions and the time he said something like, "If I ever date a man, I'll be open about it because I want my fans to know that part of my life," so he seems openminded more than anything specific.

Then you've got Prem who once said in an interview (paraphrasing) that he never thought of dating men before he worked in BL, but now he doesn't care about gender when considering romantic partners. But, as far as I know, he's never used a label.

I've noticed that a lot of Thai actors are private about the labels they use—if they use any! There are a fair number of queer actors, and friends living in Thailand have said that that information is more commonly known among domestic fans, but whether or not it becomes information for the global public to have is up to each individual actor to decide.

Years ago, Fluke Natouch used the label "gay" for himself in an interview about his casting in Until We Meet Again. If I'm remembering correctly, he asked New (the director) if him being openly gay would be an issue when promoting the series. Presumably he was concerned because the agency he'd just left wanted him to be more discreet about his sexuality, and he's been independent ever since.

Even now, sexuality is still a very difficult thing to navigate, especially if you're young or in the spotlight or part of a widely conservative culture. The internet is rife with misinformation, so always, always make sure to check your sources. Unfortunately, we can't just trust that everyone is doing their due diligence, and I think it's an act of true kindness and deep respect to make sure your facts about people are in order before you speak of them. Especially when you're in someone else's cultural backyard, and especially when their safety and mental health can be so easily compromised by what people say about and to them.

NOTE: I used the above examples based on what I know. It's entirely likely there's additional nuance and context in every case, so if you have additional resources, please link them! It can be difficult to stay on top of things in a language you're still in the very beginning stages of learning, so if we can help each other, we'll be better off than trying to keep up-to-date on our own.

#thai bl #thai actor #thai actors #sexuality

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kagiura-akira · 6 days

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my ASMR boyfriend

Rating: PG for Hirano's vocabulary

Words: 2100ish

Still a wip, so this is absolutely a placeholder title. This is likely going to be a long one-shot, so it'll be a bit before I properly post. But I wrote some stuff and wanted to share cause the kghr asmr AU has been plaguing my mind for a few days now and I had a productive write or die session this evening and I liked the sasawarano friendship interactions.

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Hirano Taiga has never been very good at thinking. Or rather, he's too good at thinking. Doesn't know how to stop. Now in his second year of high school, every possible thought plagues him late at night. What should he do about his paper due for English next week? He hasn't decided a topic yet. What is he going to write for his summer reflection homework? What would he even say? That he studied at the library all summer? It's not like he lives a particularly exciting life, despite how active his mind is.

Lying wide awake, thinking about school, life, his future, Hirano doomscrolls through his phone for probably a good hour or two before he decides he should try to get some sleep. It's just after midnight, and he has to wake up early to tutor Sasaki and Ogasawara tomorrow morning. So he lies there, tossing and turning, trying to shut off his brain, but all he can think about is everything he needs to remember to do in the morning.

Did he include everything he was supposed to in the flashcards he made for them?

Did he remember to pack his statistics notebook?

What about his summer break homework?

His mind won't shut up. Hell, he doesn't even think about the same topic for more than 30 seconds.

While he’s used to scrolling through his social media feeds endlessly, he doesn’t find anything particularly intriguing or thought provoking this time, so his mind starts to drift again. He can't concentrate on any one thing in particular, and he's not even conscious of the way he switches between apps — it’s just muscle memory. Twitter feed? Garbage. Instagram? Great for a few reels and not much more. Facebook? Nah, that’s mostly full of his relatives bickering or posting complaints about their neighbors. Without any real aim, he opens the Youtube app on his phone. Then, as he's scrolling through some random Youtube shorts, a handsome guy with brown hair and deep chocolate brown eyes to match catches his attention. He’s advertising a full length video for his channel.

"Can't sleep? Listen to this video to fall asleep instantly," the caption says, emphasis on the “instantly.” There’s a brief preview in the short, and Hirano is intrigued but hesitant. It seems kind of odd. Is this that ASMR thing he’s heard some people talk about? His classmates always referred to it like it was the most cringeworthy content in the depths of the internet, so his finger hovered over the link for a bit. Best case scenario, it’s exactly what it says it is, and Hirano falls asleep before 3 AM for the first time in weeks. Worst case scenario, it’s some weird video from a creepy dude on the internet and it doesn’t put him to sleep, but realistically, he’s not sleeping anyway, so giving it a chance seems like the right thing to do. What could possibly go wrong? Hirano doesn't know what to expect when he opens the full video, but it starts off simple enough.

"Hi, welcome back to my channel," the boy whispers into an expensive-looking microphone with a fluffy wind muff, gently cupping the side of it. "Tonight, we'll be reading the tale of Peter Rabbit by Beatrix Potter," he says. He opens an old picture book with an English title and a couple of rabbits on the cover: a mother rabbit dressed in a full-length dress and apron and a little rabbit in a blue sweater and rainboots standing next to her.

‘Guess we’re reading a children’s book tonight, then,’ Hirano thinks.

When the guy opens to the first page, the text is in English, too. Hirano wasn't expecting to listen to an English bedtime story told by a Japanese Youtuber tonight, but realistically, he hadn’t expected to end up on this side of the internet at all.

“Once upon a time, there were four little rabbits, and their names were Flopsy, Mopsy, Cotton-tail, and Peter...”

Hirano gets the jist of the story if he closes his eyes, but he has to focus hard on the audio for even a vague understanding. There are Japanese subtitles, though, so rather than struggle to follow, he reads along with the captions. He’s fluent enough in English thanks to the fact it’s compulsory at their school, but he’s unfamiliar enough that he only catches key verbs and nouns without the subtitles.

The guy’s voice is soft-spoken, yet still animated — a sweet and mellifluous timbre with a slightly low pitch, but not any lower than Hirano’s own voice. Half asleep, he thinks about how aptly titled the video is. This guy really knows his stuff. He’s probably one of those professional voice actors or something that does the recording for audio books. His voice is nice enough that he surely has to be.

"Peter never stopped running or looked behind him till he got home to the big fir-tree," he starts to round out the story. “He was so tired that he flopped down upon the nice soft sand on the floor of the rabbit-hole and shut his eyes...”

It only takes the words “shut his eyes” for Hirano’s own to close, like he’s obeying a subtle instruction.

About thirty seconds later, he closes the story book, but the video doesn’t end there. Hirano is barely clinging to consciousness as the guy talks a little bit about the book and the four little rabbits, commenting on how naughty Peter was for not listening to his mother. While the reading of the story itself was somewhat formal in presentation (likely due to it being in English and being read by a narrator whose first language is probably Japanese), the talk afterward is incredibly candid. His voice is a little bit muffled by his mask, but he keeps his face close to the microphone, so while his voice isn't crystal clear, it’s still audible.

“The moral of the story is, ‘listen to your mother if you want blackberries and bread for dinner and don’t want to be sent to bed without food,’” he laughs softly. “I was a little scared for the rabbit, myself, since his dad had an accident in the garden. And it’s too bad he lost his little coat and shoes. They were so cute.”

He leafs through the pages of the book again to show his favorite illustrations as he talks about it, analyzes it a little bit. Maybe it’s a bit much for a story written for the sole purpose of entertaining a sickly child — there shouldn’t be too many hidden metaphors or intentional symbolism — but Hirano enjoys the rambling.

"I hope you enjoyed this story. It's one of my favorites," he says, starting to close out the video. Hirano can’t see him smile behind the mask, but his eyes are expressive enough that he can read his face well enough to know he is. The corners of his eyes crinkle as he smiles sincerely. His voice is airy, like he’s mildly hypnotized by his own video. In the end, he’s just as relaxed as his viewers. Meanwhile, Hirano is somehow still awake, although just barely. He’s too fascinated by this boy and his voice.

"Good night," the brunette whispers over and over as the video gradually fades to black. And seconds later, Hirano's eyelids, heavy and tired, finally flutter closed. He drops his phone on the mattress next to his pillow, and just like that, he’s out like a lamp.

Probably the first time he'd slept more than five hours in a night, Hirano wakes up the next morning feeling more rested than he has for the last four years. He didn't have to walk too far to get to school, since he lives in the dorms, but he’s determined to leave early just in case, anyway. Not that Sasaki or Ogasawara would beat him there, but he has to get their notes and mini lectures ready.

If one didn't know better, they'd think Hirano was their teacher rather than a fellow classmate.

"Morning,” Hirano calls to Ogasawara as the latter pushes open the classroom door, dragging himself over to their desks near the window.

“Morning,” Ogasawara mumbles. “You're awfully chipper for 7 AM.”

“Guess I just slept well last night,” Hirano says. It’s just as Ogasawara says, though — he’s never been one for mornings, so to see him awake and not homicidal at such an early hour is a rarity.

"Sasaki’s on his way. Had to stop and take a piss since he didn’t roll out of bed till right before we got on the train," Ogasawara says with a yawn. "Thanks for doing this for us.”

Hirano laughs. "No problem. How long have I been helping you two now, anyway? I'm used to it."

“Yeah, I know, I owe you my life or something. Or at least, you can have Sasaki’s. I don’t want to think about what Eimi would say if I told her I sold my soul to you just pass my midterms.” Ogasawara shudders in response to a deeply buried traumatic thought resurfacing — a feeling that can only be understood by a fujoshi’s boyfriend.

Hirano pushes a stack of flashcards across the desk toward his friend, hoping it’ll keep him from going on about their latest fight. “Score above 80% and you can keep your soul,” he says, half-joking.

And when Ogasawara shuffles through the neatly printed and thoroughly organized deck of flashcards, he’s certain that he has, in fact, just made a deal with the devil.

“Let’s get to it, then.”

Later that night, as Hirano’s getting ready for bed, he opens up Youtube instead of his usual timelines. Looks up and down his suggested feed for the page of the guy he listened to last night, though he would easily find it if he would just look at the history on his phone. He’s surprisingly slow for someone with grades in the top 20 of his class — not exactly technologically savvy, despite his habit of looking through social media every night right before bedtime.

He scrolls through his feed, phone propped on his chest as it illuminates his face in the dark room. Desperate to find the channel, he searches, "bedtime rabbit story english japanese guy,” which does him no favors at all. Then, as if the algorithm gods have had enough of watching him struggle, it pops up as the first suggested video when he refreshes his suggested video feed for the 30th time that night. He makes sure to note the username, kgurbskt11. He isn’t sure how to read that, but at least he can’t forget such an oddly cryptic username.

First on the agenda: subscribe to the channel and bookmark it for later. He’d hate to have to go through all of this again next time he wants to watch his videos. Completely throwing caution to the wind, he scrolls through the videos for less than a few seconds before randomly tapping on one without looking at the title or thumbnail. He doesn’t know what he’s looking for — he just wants to hear something that’ll put him to sleep.

The random video is just a simple talking one, and rather than soft spoken, he spends much of the video whispering. The sound causes a tingling sensation to form at the back of his head, which then spreads over the rest of his scalp, and then down his spine. He jumps a little from the ticklish feeling it gives him, but once he’s used to it, he starts to unwind. The guy wasn't talking about anything spectacular, to be honest. Just the time he spends with his friends. There’s a story about his summer vacation and his younger sisters, and then a story about playing suikawari* at his family's estate with all of his extended family. He’s bubbly without being overwhelmingly energetic. A nice bit of rambling that has Hirano focused, but he isn't focused so much on the content of the story, this time, as he is on this boy's eyes.

Like last time, his eyes are expressive in a thousand different ways as he cycles through several emotions while recounting his summer vacation. The deep brown irises captivate Hirano, and soon he finds he isn't even listening or comprehending the words of the video anymore. And within 30 seconds of his eyes slowly starting to flutter closed, he’s abruptly awakened when he drops his phone on his face.

“Fuck,” he curses, rubbing his nose. When he returns his attention to the video, it’s a little easier to concentrate, but now he has to spend a little more time watching this channel now that he’s been awakened so abruptly. So he watches another video, only making it about five minutes in when he fell asleep for real (without dropping his phone on his face, this time).

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*Suikawari is a traditional Japanese game that involves splitting a watermelon with a stick while blindfolded

#hirano to kagiura #kagihira #hirano taiga #kagiura akira #hirakagi #my wips #hrkg asmr au

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