#this was all I did today please be nice

[moeblob]

Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.

Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.

#my characters #waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit #deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee #and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name #deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c #man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while #he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair #ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so #its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons #but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me #and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not #fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew #and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable #while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts #and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed #so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en #so you know maybe its that idk #and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now #and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it #and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad #that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal #and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it #the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer #anyway story time in the tags again #im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note #its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him #he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times #and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea #and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you

[st0neddew-valley]

EEEEEEEEEEE GETTING A STARDEW TATTOO IN A WEEK⭐️⭐️⭐️

this poll will end in the wee hours of the morning before i get it, reblogs are appreciated !!! ;P

#st0neddew-valley #stardew valley #sdv #stardew valley tattoo #i don’t wanna spoil anything about it but it’s not original at all lmao #that’s ok though #i’m so excited #i sent the sketch outline thing to my artist today and they’re down to do it #gonna blast my inner elbow :’) #jk i’m using numbing cream #bc FUCK being super uncomfortable during a tattoo #ramble: #i used numbing cream on my last tattoo (sternum) and i shit you not i didn’t feel a thing for 3 hours #it was so fucking nice folks #highly recommend if you are super duper nervous about needles #or honestly if you’re worried about it being too painful #PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ASK YOUR ARTIST BEFORE USING ANY NUMBING CREAM #THEY MAY NOT LIKE TO WORK WITH THE SKIN WHEN ITS EFFECTED (read it makes the skin tighter ???? idk) #they also might have really good recommendations #mine sure fucking did :) #ramble: done

[horrorwebs]

why are men literally the fucking worst

#theres a guy in one of my uni friend groups who has a crush on my friend also from the friend group #and she feels so so uncomfortable plus she hasnt done ANYTHING thatd give a hint that she likes him back. bc she doesnt #and now she doesnt feel ok around because hes so attached to her and so so needy and its like. well. way to fuck it up dude. fuck you #he has been acting so strange lately and not in a good way. strange awkward and needy and like. possesive. #her and i also have another friendgroup where frankly i feel much better with and she does too. and its like. well the guy is always like #butting in but now really being part of anything? like its not like he comes over to the grouo to be with all of us hes just sort of . there #talking only to her or sometimes me but its like not nice its weird and annoying #ALSO HES SO PATRONIZING TOWARDS HER ITS AWFUL #AND hes like. a bit older.... where its not like. the weirdest age gap i dont think so. but it IS a bit weird considering some of the things #he has said. like the other day he made a comment about how my friend 'well shes so young like people her age sometimes dont get [x]' like? #if you think she is SOOO young and SOOO out of touch with people your age well why the fuck are you asking others if you have a chance w her #get away from her really #sidenote: today she was telling me and a different friend about this problem and my other friend said it was really uncomfortable and bad + #that he used to think the guy had a thing for ME BEFORE??? and i dont know if he also thought -i- had a thing for him but please god no. #even the hypothetical made me feel super uncomfortable. also i used to feel like that a bit like he might like me and it was bad and gross #so i dropped a comment that let him believe i was a lesbian i think? also got much colder towards him . like. thats what you get fucker #about the lesbian thing i meant that he told me about a friend of his that had it hard coming out as a lesbian and i said like oh yeah being #like that was hard for me also. finding out i was not straight was tough etc . #dont remember if i said the word lesbian i dont think so but i did say i like girls and i didnt mention boys at all so i hoped itd be enough #also people dont really -get- what being asexuas means + didnt want to tell him im ace + techically i Can like boys bc romantic attraction #is undefined to me but i was definetely not going to tell him that bc 1. im much more prone to like a girl and 2. not trying to get his hope #up. #so anyway it was gross to realize other people saw it too so i mightve actually not been insane to think he had a crush on me but it was bad #and also. i really need for my friend to be comfortable in class so i might have to kill him who knows. well see #spikeposting #personal

[rox-of-iu]

@ the people saying kind words and offering me english alternatives for the czech in my last post

first of all, I know you mean well and I love you to bits and I'm giving you a little kissy, ok? But... guys I do know English phrases... hahhah

Listen,,,, I am chronically online and I do actually have a certificate from C2 exams that is just 5 points shy of being 100%. I Know it absolutely doesn't look that way but that's just because I'm the laziest guy around and I don't feel like fixing it after myself when I have the excuse of being a foreigner- sahdjsd

so when i use czech words it is not out of the necessity of not knowing any substitutes but just me goofing around and going haha funny word go brr

#man this is probably coming of as mean and super defensive but its not supposed to be 😭😭 (tones still hard in any language) #it is genuinly super nice of you to try to help out!! and you couldn't have known so 💞 #but just throwing that out there....jasdhksdj #o(-( man #ykno like i said throwing in cz words is just me having fun with it #since its my scribble side blog and all that #because due to spending almost all my free time connected to english-centric internet my own language/culture took a bit of a backseat #like even in my day to day life which is very prevalent among lot of foreign people today #but i wont get into it now it doesn't rly matter #so me throwing in some funky words is me just having fun around and trying to bring some of it back while i doodle #but looking back at it it is prolly weird to do since ykno its Chinese so what is cz doing there and no one will understand it anyway #so ppl are probably left feeling confused or cheated out of something #so i should probably just stick with eng alternatives #oh well #idk why im even making this post this has completely derailed ashdk and again I'm not mad at beloveds who commented and left tags #it just made me think #and overthinking hahh bcuz im in the middle of stressful projects #plus tHE STUPIDASS UNI DOENST WANNA ACCEPT MY MONEY OK PLEASE TAKE IT I BEG OF U I WILL PAY EARLIER NEXT TIME (lying) #anyway thats all jhds uhh bye #wait im already having regrets about making this post in the first place man but i did spend valuable time typing it out so ughhh

[boyswanna-be-her]

Ok phew im pleasantly exhausted with this person, and relieved that there's a limit. I'm still second-guessing myself after manicgate and had been carefully asking myself "am i unnaturally 'funding' energy I don't have because someone is paying attention to me?" but today was a balanced day where I STILL spent ~7 hours with them, in addition to like working on other projects! Spending time alone! Developing my program for Saturday! Got a chip repaired in my car windshield (thanks for nothing louisiana) and went on a walk in a weird park. Took care of all my responsibilities, ate three meals, etc.

My friend slotted nicely into the other things I was doing. We had an extremely chill morning as a duo at the clinic with 3-5 protesters throughout the sessions, all of whom were intimidated enough not to talk to us OR approach any clients, which I've never encountered before. Wonderful. We literally sat in camping chairs with our feet up in my trunk reading for the majority, although I feel like when we both have the energy, we never run out of things to talk about. Then we co-worked this afternoon a few hours after the end of our clinic shift at their favorite spot to work (which I'd never visited before). I came back to the beach and resumed normal life. They pinged me after dinner to ask if I wanted to voice chat (??? idk, that's new) and I said thank you and that I was catching up on TV.

it didn't feel clingy or anything, it feels like when you're a child and your best new friend from class wants you to come over to play and how nice and validating that is. but I'm just like... respectfully, no, I'll be seeing you in person in <12 hours at the clinic again, and then we're coworking (finishing a major project together tomorrow! Phew glad to be done) and then after dinner (where im committed elsewhere), I'm going back to their place again for stronglifts.

I'm enthused that they're enthralled by my... friendship (or whatever??? If it's not something beyond friendship, they're intellectually very down to clown in a way that i've never experienced before without it leading to something distinctly non platonic) and it's nice to be where I'm at in this dynamic (an equal give and take of time and resources, reliance and support, jokes and down to work shit, and reassuringly i'm almost never the one initiating).

Anyway, I'm just like. Okay! I'm sated. We good. Would love to talk to you tonight but I'm also not at that "let's chit chat with irl voices while I'm sleepy" stage yet, although the potential for that is something I would've def hardcore jumped on before I was concentrating on centering and more eager to define things. I don't wanna do the co-dependency thing again any time soon, even when somone has planted many green flags, even with someone my community has verified independently as a good person who isn't just love-bombing me, even with someone cute and smart (and unexpectedly significantly stronger than me? holy shit??). Reaching an organic limit of energy I can set aside for them feels like a really healthy place to be with it right now.

#i always wanna like be so balanced in reporting back #it helps me organize my thoughts abt things #but then i'll remember like 'oh lol they complimented my smile today in a picture we were looking at for business purposes' #like... come on #come ON #the messages are not even mixed is the funny thing there's like #no evidence to the contrary #i think we're both just insane baby birds and that's great and healthy #nice to be gentle with someone who is gentle with me in turn #who I literally had to ask to stop thanking me #after teasing them about it for two days they still did not get the hint #like please im begging you to stop saying thank you to everything normal i do #WE ARE TOGETHER ALL DAY I DONT HAVE TIME FOR THIS #i just stopped responding to it today tough love #bfr

[todayisafridaynight]

I genuinely can never thank you enough for the past year. I can't express how much it's meant to me to be understood and have my energy reciprocated with someone on the same wavelength. Although I've been in the fandom for quite a bit longer than most people writing in, and longer than you, even, I can't remember the last time I felt this welcome and motivated. A TRULY embarrassing amount of my work's just been fueled by "oh Snap's gonna wanna see that," and of course that circle's expanded since then, but it probably wouldn't have had I not met stream chat through you, aaaaaand if I'm honest you're still up there... lol...

It's always, always a highlight of my day to see your your work, your posts, and your responses, whether they're to me or to others, and it's always a highlight of my week to be able to make it to streams! You're a huge inspiration for me, particularly in terms of your work ethic across the board. I always come out of streams energized and feeling like I can actually finish things, and usually this is hubris, but it's gotta count for something.

Not to be dramatic, but you kinda changed my life, no exaggeration. I still really can't see myself the way I was two or three years ago not just calling it quits after some of my Gaiden experiences... lol... but I'm still around, and like always, I wanna be able to write in and interact as much as I used to sometime soon. Thanks for everything! I hope RGGS continues to deliver so we can stay in touch :3

i cant thank YOOOOU enough for the past Xsome months or so. feelins ABSOLUTELY mutual in that i wasnt sure anyone else would really be into talkin bout rgg as you and i have (or would be willing to read my. miles-long scrolls of bullshit LMAO) so it's been real fun gettin to know you an everyone and chattin !!

most bafflin thin to ever to think i have good work ethic, i feel like ive been behind everyone for the past couple weeks and even with the things i do make it's really not up to snuff. it's always nice to hear that's not supposedly exactly the case :) I Suppose :^)

rgg community (like any community lbr) can be. An Experience, esp for someone with a position like yours. so im glad i can make it worth to hang around somewhat LOL

regardless, i always look forward to you next ask or the next time you leave tags on a post i make. if i ever bother making a post again ☠️☠️

#fave #snap chats #I DID SIT ON THIS ALL DAY OOPS #i got a bit busy with some stuff...... also i always try my best to write a sufficient response cause ill feel bad if i dont </3 #mad funny youre stoked for me to see stuff And I Am Always Stoked To See Stuff cause i got a similar sentiment towards you #i mean i TRYYYY not to get too in my head bout it since then i get paranoid but i always do hope on the downlow like #'ah man. hope this is funny. hope masu likes it. hope im shot for this one' VERY NORMAL things to want :) #so funny tho. funny timin of this ask i feel like ive been disappointin people an particularly yous #which 'snap that doesnt make sense please be happy with yourself for three seconds' which. NO?? no. impossible #but i do get worried im disappointing or being too annoying or yk. just being a pest or not being adequate #so it's fun/ny gettin this ask today all that considered LOL #I MEAN I KNOW EVERYONE BEEN NICE THE PAST DAY OR SO YK SO NO REASON TO THINK IT #i cant avoid thinkin a it... my number one bully is myself he Will Not leave me alone no matter how hard i try to complain to the board #the board also bein myself. i cant excommunicate myself from myself-- #REGARDLESS. very cool that i give you motivation :) esp after streams :) #every time i finish a stream i feel like i made an ass out of myself. ALWAYS HAVE FUN. but i feel at the cost of bein obnoxious #tho i guess theres no point stayin round if i was. lest its like Last Resort kinda deal then TRULY i am sorry im The Last Resort #ILL STOP WHINING FOR FIVE SECONDS TO SAY thank you :) for everythin :) both just chattin with me an all the work you do for the community #it truly is a lot and indescribable and its very cool i have someone like that who likes what i do. you do be the beyonce in walmart to me #to reference that post i rb'd last night LOL its still hard for me to understand but ig i dont have to understand it #i think i mentioned this before but i remember when id draw for persona (cringe ik) id mostly draw adachi (this is relevant Trust) #and this one mate one day was just 'snap its really nice how much. love you bring to the adachi community' #which is a hilarious thing to say since adachi sucks but POINT IS im glad i. i THINK im kinda doing the same thing now still #thats the consensus ive gotten the past couple asks.. lol.. its nice bringin people together and havin a fun and welcomin space :) #ILL WRAP IT UP HERE THO before i make people throw up. i kept this ask hoarded long nuff.. ill just hoard it in my chest cavity instead #once more thank you forever and always :) when we inevitability branch off to other things i'll always treasure all you've done for me

[marblerose-rue]

HI GUYS i am so sorry for the sudden drop in activity between allergies + college im just gonna clear off the rest of this week . i may do a big group type thing to catch up w/o giving myself too much extra work BUT i hope everyone is well!! <3

#not art #meandering #i did get a haircut today and every time i see myself in the mirror i startle myself a little bc i forget i got one AHBKJHDG #i have two exams next week . and a speech i have to give the week after and one of my classes is JUST NOW handing out assignments #OH YEAH my allergy symptoms r dealt with im normal again BAHBDJKFHGBDF when it gets bad it gets bad #this is my attempt at the fallen family guy pose without taking it too seriously #OH YEAH for a lot of you new followers: this is kaden shes my fursona of almost ten years (WELL she turns nine in november) #and i celebrate her birthday bc shes important to me shes my original meowmeow #also please keep me in your thoughts im on campus all day tomorrow and i really do not want to be i am no longer having fun/enjoying #my wednesdays . i only rlly enjoy one class on monday and its math . thats how bad it is BAHAHA no but rlly my stats prof is a sweetheart #hes very nice. he gave me an extension on a quiz i rlly didnt need but regardless :-)

[moregraceful]

Beryl recording our pod together aka my realization I wrote three separate languages in that fic, which i think sets a new standard for the absolutely unhinged things I've made my podficcers do for this challenge

#it WAS four then i was like no i cannot make beryl jump from italian to english to finnish to spanish to english theyll kill me #somehow thinking spanish to english to finnish to spanish to english was easier for them?? #our disclaimer this year: beryl did so much research trying get down the pronunciation of roope PLEASE be nice #i'm so excited tho. they sent me a snippet and i lost my mind robo and roope's interactions sound sooo good #fresno oilers.txt #if you're like why is kasper posting so much today its bc i am procrastinating on So Many Things that are ALL high priority lol

[gandreida]

hheeeuuurrgghppbbtttt

#my dad messaged me today sayin’ he hopes to see me soon and it honestly ruined my day luke #like please leave me alone :////// #then some general normal Every Day BS happened at work and I just had to dip I almost walked off the job no word to my sups #Just makes me think of my mom which #i feel more justified after it I guess ‘cause she’s the one who allegedly approves the messages her husband sent me when we had our fight #tbh life is better w/o her messaging me daily like I spent basically all of 2023 #wanting to cut her off and she gave me even the lightest reason to do it so i did and it’s been nice #the pointless guilt I felt for not wanting to see my family has turned into general resentment and annoyance #i don’t even miss her or him like I straight up just don’t want to see my blood relatives they’re not family to me they’re just people #i happen to share genes with like if you really wanted to build a relationship with the person #you forced into this stupid world then maybe you shouldn’t have been such insufferable assholes for the first 18 years #i spent most of my conversations with them over the phone last year basically just saying life sucks and that i want to kill myself #I need them to feel bad for conceiving me i need them to regret it #my cousin Aaron has the right idea tbh like last I heard he wasn’t talking to my uncle or anyone w/ blood relations really #following in his footsteps. I legit just got so full of rage and frustration when my dad messaged me it’s been like 3 weeks since we spoke #it was so obvious that I didn’t like my mom growing up everyone knew it and berated me for it like how am i supposed to accept that? #How am I supposed to take the hate and anger she exhibit and put out there in that unhappy home #and turn the hate and anger her and her family felt towards me for not loving her #and turn that into love? How am I supposed to turn unending anger and hatred and bitterness and just be like ‘yeah i love you’ #I love my parents in the sense that I am familiar w/ them and they have had a constant presence in my life up this point and when I was like #8y/o I had some pretty good times w/ my dad that were DIRECTLY related to my mom being out of the house #my mom was just so abusive to that man for 20+ years #and he took the love I had for him and made me hate him by just shoving jesus down my throat #We used to have CONVERSATIONS he & I but then he got his head stuck so far up his ass that he couldn’t see #how he was just ruining everything. Me: Hey so this thing thats goin on? #him: haha yeah that thing thats been goin on!! You know what tho #[starts pitching JC to me again] #that was all I could get from him from 12-18/19 #he killed whatever relationship we had together and now it’s a decade later and I have no interest in talking to him #I don’t care to try and rebuild. I don’t want to rebuild anything with him I don’t want him to want that either

[inkykeiji]

happy halloween everyone!!!（o ｀▽´ )oΨ i hope you all have a lovely day filled with all treats and no tricks <333

uhhh my dad fell again this morning, i literally just woke up to this news (some of the worst news to wake up to on halloween ._.) i have no further information right now so i don’t know how serious it is or if he’s okay or if he hit his head or what, but if i end up suddenly disappearing for a few days, you know why!!! please be safe out there my friends, i am sending you all so much love and health <3

#one thing after another with this family i swear to god we cannot catch a fucking break #but anyway #are any of u dressing up!? #/did you dress up over halloweekend!? #i did not :(((((( #i just wrote and slept and watched my boyfriend play persona 5 LMAO #please be safe today my friends <333 #treat yourselves to something nice!!!!!!!!! you deserve it!!!!! #if u can’t treat urself on halloween then when *can* you treat urself tbh #hahahaha #i love u lots <33 #happy halloween 🎃 <33 #i was gonna make this all pretty and aesthetic with the gradient words but our internet is out due to the rain so :(( i have to use my phone #& i can’t do html on the tumblr app obv hehe

[jedi-bird]

So because I'm on antidepressants now I'm apparently not allowed to have any bad days. Like, not sure how to explain that that's not how it works and that ignoring me and refusing to speak to me isn't going to help.

#vent post #personal #I'm just fucking tired today and need a distraction because yesterday sucked #i just wanted to go to a bookstore or a garden center for my birthday and instead i had to sit in silence while my partner played games #for literally the entire day while not speaking to me because they were concentrating #and half the time they wanted the lights off because the gets dark at times and they refuse to adjust the settings #so i couldn't even crochet or read without leaving the room which just made them whine about it later #and i know i don't expect anything anymore for my birthday but being ignored by the one person who promised to never do so hurts #it's like being a kid again and getting told that you're not important and that everyone else gets to dictate what you do on your day #when everyone else got treated like royalty on theirs #i sit at home all day every day with no one to talk to so it's not much to want to have some kind of interaction #and yeah I'm literally complaining about nothing but it hurts so much sometimes to be reminded that I'm not really worth much #i did get some presents and one way really nice #but to immediately after just be left alone and forgotten kind of makes me wish they had just actually forgotten #to top it off the night ended with my estranged family trying to text a different family member about how they forgot again to send a card #immediately followed by oops you weren't supposed to see that because we love and care about you #like please stop and just leave me alone #i don't want anything from you guys ever again because you expect too much in return #and i remember the shit you used to say about and to me and the blame you laid on me #just stop pretending like you care and leave me alone #so today is just hard for stupid reasons and i don't really have a reason for being super depressed but i am #and getting mad that I'm crying isn't going to help #i need a distraction and can't have one and just can't cope #might go buy myself something nice off ebay to try and feel better but also the present i bought myself got stolen so maybe i won't

[beholdthemem]

Well, on a positive note, I can at least say that I've finally started bonding with my sister's boyfriend as opposed to making awkward stilted small talk while we both wait for her to reappear and save the conversation.

#personal #he is a nice kid it's just that neither of us were ever quite sure what to say beyond just Generic Politeness #but there's nothing like a group 911 incident to break the ice and get you all to talk like normal people afterwards. #scared the shit out of him. i think this was his first experience with it poor dude. #when i left today he was still hanging out with taly because neither he nor taly wanted her to be alone and i ended up leaving him with #over 40 bucks for takeout because we have taly food here but the pickings for people without dietary restrictions #are slim and i was worried about him not being willing to leave to go eat and just skipping food altogether. #sweet thought but last thing either of them need. #just shoving him a wad of bills like 'here i gotta head out but please eat' #i think an ambulance has come to the neighborhood like. 5 times since I've lived here #and 3 of those times have been for us. #saw the older brother from the end of the block going back in without a word after coming out to see what was going on #and while normally i have no issue with that one- he's a bit of a hermit and put up with a lot from us neighbor kids when we were little #without bitching about it it's just tge younger brother i can't stand- i couldn't help feeling a little bit scathing about that. #okay there are you satisfied? did you get your look? your entertainment? you gonna go back home and be like It Was That Family Again 🙄? #gonna go back to your quiet life and your jackass brother? #ugh. I've gotten very mean lately. not to anyone in person i don't say anything that would hurt anyone's feelings #i just find myself... thinking them now. when i didn't used to. #it isn't nice. i wish i didn't.

[an-aura-about-you]

sandwich places are good, but nobody makes a good veggie sandwich like a good pizza place.

#food #all the other sandwich places in town want what US Pizza's veggie sandwich has #look I know everyone's got their opinions on which veggies are the good veggies #just know that US Pizza's veggie sandwich was built like it was made for me #everything I love nothing I hate and they'll put it on rye bread if I ask nice #Subway comes close with their level of customization but it's not the same #but shoutout to the Subway who made my food today because Bitesquad doesn't list bell peppers #so I put a note in there asking them if they'd please put bell peppers on my sandwich and they did

[theyarebothgunshot]

my friends were trading funny stories about me flirting with women last night. how dare they make fun of me during pride month, the biphobia of it all!!!

#i'm jk of course it was all in good fun #though it can be a struggle to have straight friends ngl lmaoooo #but they are still the best so it's all good #one of them was like 'did you last have a crush on a man or a woman?' etc etc #anyways another friend said she and her boyfriend are gonna binge the boys today #and i was like omggggg yes please do and let me know your thoughts and also jensen ackles is in it #she knows about my spn obsession so that was fun shfsh she had no idea #ok enough rambling hope y'all have a nice day <3

[dapper-nahrwhale]

Hard out here for your local aroace who just wants friendship & family fics not ship fics :/

#i have been scrolling for HOURS for good gen stuff and no!!! there is NOTHING aghhghh biting. ahhg. sick of this. #b.text #idont mind ships but like. LIKE. cmon. i JUST. want like 1 nice gen one please. #last time i check out stuff for 2017it. ahhguuuhghhuhhhg...aahaahg. #i want stuff abt the like. things they did ans went through and dealing with that together and stuff ect ect ect. #but nooooo. #unbearable. to just. ahgggh. #yeah this is incomprehensible but like. sometimes i JUST want romance free stuff. and like no. no. #this is all me just being mad abt little things but like. sick this. #ill say this. the dnd.ads has absolutely spoiled me for good family gen stuff. literally. very good. #this is. alot. but idk man. just annoyed at everythibg today :/ #and its not even like oh theres a few that are good no its literally none. been so i to dnds tuff for the past few years id forgot. #most fandoms dont haveva ton of gen stuff. but alot of dnd is fphnd family based ig. idk im rambling..

[earanie]

so.

#first of all ive already been told exactly how stupid i am by my dear friend so i know #im dumb #But stiiiilll #remember how last week while i was having an all around breakdown i wrote to Them™? #it was just a stupid text like how you doing #But I mean stupid!! stupid!! so stupid! riiight? #what was i hoping? idk. I just wanted to hear from them and so well i took the matter in my own 2 hands #I missed them and I wanted to hear from them since I think about them 24/7 anyhow #and guess what? they answered me #(we're supposed to be friends of course they did) #and alright we were having a nice convo #i was kinda afraid they'd be kind of stand offish #not bc of anything but probably not to try and lead me on yk? #that's what id do probably - kind but not too involved as not to give any false hope #and im so glad bc they arent doing that! we really did have a nice convo #ok at some point they answered kinda weirdly but that's probably just them being a v bad texter #which - fair - im not that good myself #thing isssss... the convo is still going on. 6 no 7 days later? #they're offering info that they don't need to. asking questions too! it's like they're actually enjoying talking to me! #I want to cry of happiness okay #and ik this doesn't mean a thing - i know it. i know how things stand. I am okay with it. #But to know they still enjoy talking to me and sending their precious little time chatting with me - i mean. fuck #and each time the convo was kinda dying down they still managed to keep it going 😭 i could cry #and today we've really been going back and forth and it's the best thing that's happened to me all month ok? ok. #and they've just asked me how was my morning. totally unnecessary question. im so happy i could die #yes im delusional but im in love so please god please universe - just keep thing convo going a bit more #just let me have this - it's such a small joy and such a small hope - just let me have this for a little while more #I wont go crazy - or i will but it won't hurt me worse than ive already been hurt so the danger is worth it #god I love them that's so awful