#two quotes! one from etho’s and one from grian’s

[theminecraftbee]

> check social links

(Which Social Link should I check on...?)

0 FOOL School Rescue Committee Should this really be an official school club? The group of Persona-users that I'm in now, whether I like it or not. At least I'm helping people by doing all this weird magic nonsense...

I MAGICIAN Scar A fellow Persona-user a year below me, although my senior in fighting Shadows. He's dragged me into his scam crystal-selling operation, which is actually weirdly fun.

II PRIESTESS Beef Pretty large and muscular for a priestess, but sure, I'll bite. A volunteer EMT who is trying to decide whether to follow his family's wishes for university.

III EMPRESS Gem A fellow Persona-user in my year. She wants me to help her study for entrance exams, apparently. Not sure why she's asking me, I missed an entire semester? But it's good enough study for me as well.

IV EMPEROR Impulse A fellow Persona-user in my year. He has a single-minded devotion to overworking himself, despite the fact he seems to be trying to prove it's fine for some reason.

V HIEROPHANT Xisuma An older man who hangs out in the local tea shop. Keeps trying to parent me for some reason, although it seems like his relationship with his actual family's a bit less good, so maybe that's why.

VI LOVERS Etho My lab partner. The whole school's obsessed with him for some reason. My only solace is that he seems to be just as disconcerted by that fact as I am.

VII CHARIOT Skizzleman A fellow Persona-user in my year, and my first friend in this town. I'm helping him find a part-time job. He's sort of ridiculously cheerful, but I know he understands me better than most people.

VIII JUSTICE Grian A fellow Persona-user a year below me, although my senior in fighting Shadows. Keeps dragging me into his pranks, although for such a gregarious guy, he's weirdly isolated.

IX HERMIT Joe Hills One of my teachers, and the head of the School Rescue Committee. He's, frankly, the most bizarre guy I know, and I don't know what to make of any of the "wisdom" he tries to impart on us.

X FORTUNE Tango Apparently, he's a bit of a prodigy in the robotics club, but he first came to me to confess he's considering quitting. I have no idea why this is my problem, but Impulse frowned at me about it, so here I am.

XI STRENGTH False A local martial artist who's been decorated with a number of titles. I just wanted her to teach me how to fight better, but apparently, she's starting to doubt her own fighting ability as well.

XII HANGED MAN Jimmy Igor's assistant in the Velvet Room. He's a bit of an idiot, but he's also my idiot. Mostly wants to request I escort him to places in the human world, although he wants specific fusions sometimes too.

XIII DEATH Cleo A "florist" in town who can source us weapons and fence goods from Altered Space. I'm pretty sure she's actually Yakuza, or at least criminal. She and Joe know each other, although strangely, she doesn't seem to remember from where.

XIV TEMPERANCE Iskall and Stress Two priests at the local shrine. I work for them occasionally to help them with odd jobs around town. They share some common past they don't like to talk about.

XV DEVIL Ren The student council president. He's bizarrely mad with power on a good day, which is weird, because he's also bizarrely kickable on a good day. Keeps on trying to rope me into the Student Council.

XVI TOWER Doc An inventor trying to invent a safe new clean energy source. According to rumors, his last try exploded, killing his lab partner, which constantly makes me question why I'm here.

XVII STAR Zedaph Proprietor of the famous local "Mystery Stir Fry Extravaganza". Frankly, his creations terrify me more than Doc's do. I have no idea why this is Impulse's favorite restaurant.

XVIII MOON Mumbo A fellow Persona-user in the year below me. Apparently, he still gets bullied a lot, but he has a scheme to, and I quote, 'learn to be something scary, like a horse.' Good luck with that, mate.

XIX SUN Pearl An artist that I've always admired. Recently, she was in a terrible car accident, and her hands now constantly shake because of it. I still think she can draw organic shapes better than me, though.

XX JUDGEMENT Soul Reappearance Committee Judgement. Hah. I guess you'd call this Judgement Day, sure.

XXI THE WORLD ... It's me.

#smallishsona au #a bee fic #WOO I HAVE THE FINAL LIST OF EVERYONE! #some of joel's descriptions here actually give away the social link plotline #but a FEW of them actually do not. #but WOO HERE ARE THE SOCIAL LINKS! :D

[lectern-fullcauldron]

do you know your hermistory? hermitcraft debuts in order

Short ID: an infographic illustrating each current hermitcraft whitelist member's hermitcraft debut date by season. Each hermit is illustrated next to an abridged tfc quote that reads 'a great big dysfunctional family'

Long ID below cut

Image ID: a long single panelled infographic on a rainbow gradient background. Down the right hand side reads "a great big, dysfunctional family". The infographic has the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 8 down the left hand side, each with a corresponding colour on the gradient.

Section one: down the left hand side of this section are the following stats: 'April 2012: Hypno, Xisuma', 'May 2012: Keralis, Joe Hills' 'Jan 2013: Bdubs'. All of the above hermits are illustrated in the section. Keralis, Xisuma, and Hypno stand at the top as founding members of the server. There is an illustration of a leaf block on a two high fence next to Keralis labelled 'booshes' and an arrow points at Hypno reading 'website admin'. Below them, Joe Hills reclines in a Uno wildcard themed bubble reading a book called 'scam'. An arrow points to this bubble that reads 'the original new guy'. Bdubs' appears waving in a small white circle below Joe with the caption '2 eps in S1. Coming soon!'

Section two: a neon green arrow bridges this section to section one. It comes from Joe Hills and reads 'coup!'. Down the left of this section are the following stats: 'June 2013: Cleo, Mumbo', 'Oct 2013: TFC', 'Dec 2013: iJevin', 'June 2014: False', 'July 2014: Tango', and 'Sept 2014: xbcrafted'. Cleo and mumbo sit together with an arrow pointing at them reading 'both too shy to talk to people' - this text also has an arrow pointing at falsesymmetry. Tfc is depicted carrying a pair of binoculars and has an arrow pointing at him that reads 'branch mine advocate' of which the branch is underlined. Ijevin carries a stopwatch and False a diamond sword. Tango holds a minecraft oak door and has two bits of text pointing at him. The first reads 'early iron farm visitor' and the second reads 'redstone genius'. This second text has arrows that also descend down to impulse, doc, and etho in section three. The final hermit in section two is xb, who is lying on his stomach, kicking his legs and looking up at tango.

Section three: the stats down the left hand side of this section read 'Jan 2015: impulse', 'march 2015: etho, doc'. Impulse is depicted falling into a yellow pentagram with the caption 'summoned to help with quad witch hut'. Below this, doc and etho stand side by side (doc a head taller than etho). Doc has a pen and a clipboard and the pair are labelled 'mindcrack refugees'.

Section four: the stats down the left hand side of this section read: 'Feb 2016: Welsknight, Iskall, Scar, Ren, Cub', 'Sept 2016: Beef'. The five hermits for Feb 2016 are depicted in a line with a box grouping cub and scar with a note that reads 'do not separate'. Below them is the caption 'kingdomcraft'. Beef reclines alone below them, with a note beside him that reads 'mesa-ing around' (title of cub's first hermitcraft episode).

Section five: the stats down the left hand side of this section read: 'April 2017: Stress, Bdubs, Zed'. This section is relatively small. Stress is in a GG get gorgeous t-shirt, holding an allium. Bduds is asleep on Zed, wrapped up in his moss cloak. Above him reads 'NHO time!'

Section six: the stats down the left hand side of this section read: 'July 2018: grian'. This section depicts grian t-posing with white wings and orange goose feet. He has two captions, the first reads 'started a war' and has an arrow pointing up to stress as well. The other reads 'horrible goose t-posing to assert dominance'.

Section 8: the stats down the left hand side of this final section read: 'June 2021: Gem, Pearl'. Gem and pearl are depicted hugging with the captions 'moon big' and 'gem is great'. Pearl's face is depicted as a moon and her eyes are craters. She still has blonde hair to match her minecraft skin.

End ID

#good to reblog #hermitcraft #joe hills #zombiecleo #didn't show up with tags with the old tags so maybe redoing it will fix?? #described

[mcyt-enthusiast]

MCYT incorrect quotes my beloved:

Tango: WHO ATE MY BREAD?!

Tango: I'M GOING TO K-

Zedaph: I did?

Tango: Kiss you and buy some more, you haven't been eating anything today Zedaph.

*walking away*

Zedaph:

Zedaph: He's gone Impulse.

Impulse, coming out the closet with bread stuffed in his mouth: Twankh uh!

Jimmy: I can do anything I put my mind to. I once figured out Joey's phone number just by choosing random numbers.

Lizzie: Joel likes to win. When he was 8, a little Club Scout friend of his bragged that they could sell the most cookies.

Lizzie: Damned if Joel didn't walk the neighborhood till he got blisters on his feet, and won by 10 boxes.

Lizzie: Best part is, Joel wasn't even a Club Scout.

BDubs: What's the straightest thing you've ever done?

Etho: *sighs*

Etho: I killed a man.

Doc: You either buckle down and do your work or you'll end up at McDonalds.

BDubs: We're going to McDonalds if I don't do my work?

Doc: NO-

Doc: So are you gonna explain how the hell you crashed my car?

Grian: Well we were driving and there was a deer in the road, so I said "Scar, deer!"

Doc: ...And what did Scar do?

Grian: ...He said "Yes, Honey?"

Scott: I don't want to fight you!

Jimmy: I wouldn't want you to fight me either!

Teacher: Your child was in a fight.

Scar: Oh no, that's terrible!

Grian: Did they win?

Shelby: So, are you two friends?

Joey: Yes.

Katherine: No.

Jimmy: I'm in love with you.

Scott: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.

Jimmy: I know.

Scott: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

Oli: Can I offer you a nice stick in this trying time?

Shelby: Ooh, somebody has a crush

Jimmy: Pfft, I don't have a crush on Scott I just think he's cool, it's not like I stay up at night thinking about him.

*Later that night*

Jimmy, very much awake: Uh oh.

Jimmy: Where is Tango?

Etho: I'll do you one better, who is Tango??

Scott: Here's a better question, why is Tango?

Xisuma: Y'know, maybe things aren't so bad. I'm here. I got the nice ocean breeze. Just alone with my thoughts.

Grian: Hey, Xisuma.

Xisuma: GODDAMNIT!

Mumbo: Did it hurt when you fell-

Grian: From heaven? Wow, I didn't think you were such a flirt-

Mumbo: No, I meant when you fell down the stairs.

Grian: ...

Mumbo: You just laid there for 15 minutes.

Tango: What's your biggest fear?

Mumbo: That I'll never be good enough for anyone.

Scar: Everyone hates me and talks about me behind my back.

Grian: Zombies.

Mumbo: ...

Scar: ...

Grian: BUT they can open doors.

BDubs, rushing into the room: It's terrible, just terrible! I am so upset!

Impulse: BDubs, honey, sit down! Sweetheart, tell us all about it. Etho, would you get BDubs some water?

Etho: What is he gonna do with water? Has water ever made you feel better when you were upset? Have you ever heard anyone say, "Thank God, the water's here!"?

Tango: Jimmy likes to say 'you can be part of the problem or part of the solution,' but I happen to believe you can be both.

Ren: Where are you going?

Etho: Hell, eventually.

Lizzie: *Talking to Joel* Oh, hi. I didn't see you there. Welcome to my abode. I'm glad you could join me.

FWhip: But this is my abode.

Lizzie: ...

Lizzie: Welcome to my abode, I'm so happy to have you, guest.

Impulse: I think we can all agree I'm the ten amongst these threes.

Jimmy, very tired: Can I sleep in your bed?

Scott: *half asleep* Jimmy, this is a queen-sized bed. That means it's for *gestures vaguely to himself* queens.

BigB: Hey Cleo, can you give me the opposite of these words?

BigB: Always, Coming, From, Take, Me, Down.

Cleo: Never, Going, To, Give, You-

Cleo: The satisfaction.

Martyn: The next time I open up to someone, it'll be my autopsy.

Martyn: Hey, do you know the password to Cleo's computer?

Scott: Screw you, Martyn.

Martyn: Hey!!

Scott: No, you misunderstood, the password is "screwyouMartyn".

Martyn: Oh, no numbers? Not very safe.

Pearl: Real life should have a search function, or something.

Pearl: I need my socks.

FWhip: So you like cats?

Sausage: Yeah.

FWhip: *tries to impress him by slowly pushing a glass off the table*

FWhip: My life is a little too much panic and not enough disco.

Scott: My life is a little too much fall and not enough boy.

Jimmy: My life is a little too much chemical and not enough romance.

Oli: My life is a little too much imagination and not nearly enough dragons.

Doc, about Etho: He's speaking some kind of French.

Ren: Let me handle it. I speak Spanish. It's the same thing.

Impulse: You call yourself my soulmate, but where were you when my meme only had four likes?

Tango: Making four accounts.

Impulse, tearing up: Really...?

Jimmy: *yawns*

Scott: Yeah, being that pretty must be tiring.

Jimmy: Then you must be exhuasted.

Joey: Will you two shut up? Some of us are lonely.

Scar, to Mumbo: If BDubs doesn't say "I'm King of the world" within an hour on that boat, I will give you my next pay check.

BDubs, within 5 minutes of getting on the boat: I'M KING OF THE WORLD!!!

Lizzie: Joel annoyed me today so I told him that I can't wait to see what he has planned for our special day tomorrow.

Gem: There is nothing special about tomorrow.

Lizzie: But there is something special about watching the color leave his face as panic takes over.

#ldshadowlady #geminitay #BDubs #bdoubleo100 #MumboJumbo #goodtimeswithscar #smajor1995 #dangthatsalongname #solidaritygaming #impulsesv #TangoTek #rendog #EthosLab #Docm77 #theorionsound #oli orionsound #FWhip #MythicalSausage #pearlescentmoon #InTheLittleWood #ZombieCleo #bigbst4tz2 #Grian #Xisuma #xisumavoid #ShubbleYT #Shelby Shubble #joel smallishbeans #SmallishBeans #Zedaph

[sleepy0s]

the trio

This is like YHS was transported to hermitcraft! Quotes as you go.

It's midnight, I am so close to kicking my cat out of the room.

~~~

A bit of Narrating? IDK

~~~

Okay, so.. Current situation! Grian is gone..? No one knows where he is. But there are three young kids on the server! Maybe young.? They're like 16, we think. Either way, two of them have very heavy Japanese accents, the third has a mix of a british.? And the Japanese accent.? They keep whispering to each other in Japanese.. God if only Etho were here. 

~~~

Okay! Update! They know english. And, we’ve learnt their names! Sam, Taurtis and Grian. Now, even though all three of them seem very cute, Grian is very secretive about his past so it can't all be that good.

Talking about Grian! He is so cute! He's got cute little white dove? Wings, overly fluffy brown hair and so many freckles! He’s like a little bundle of joy! (Why isn't he like this anymore?)

~~~~~~~~~~

To the fic!!!

~~~~~~~~~~

YHS!Sam: If you were my husband, I'd put poison in your drink.

YHS!Grian: If I was your husband, I'd drink it.

~

Okay, lesson learnt. Don’t talk about relationships. 

The topic had come up between Pearl, Scar and Iskall. Unfortunately, Grian, Sam and Taurtis were nearby and started talking about it.

“Hey Sam, who do you think is most likely to get together from school?” Taurtis asked, skipping ahead of the two. “I dunno. Don’t think about that much.” Sam shrugged, looking towards Grian, “What about you Gree-on?”

“Not a clue. But I hope i dont get with either of you. I want a calm life in the future.” 

“Hey! I'm Calm!” Taurtis protested, gasping with fake offence.

Sam had stopped walking and was just standing on the path, a smile on his face, “You good Sam?” Grian asked, stopping to look at him.

He took a second, thinking about his words before talking, “Gree-on, if you were my husband, I’d put poison in your drink.” Taurtis was shocked. Not because of his words, no, no that was a normal thing for Sam to say. But because he had the guts to say it on hermitcraft, who all seemed to be very protective over Grian.

Grian, who walked over to Sam, his white wings twitching. He leaned in close to Sam’s ear before whispering, “If i was your husband.. I drink it.” Before he smiled and skipped over to Taurtis

~~~

Scar: Life could be a lot worse Taurtis

Taurtis: Life could be a whole lot better too!

~

Forced therapy, ah. Everyone's favourite thing.

Cub was currently sitting in a locked room, Taurtis sat opposite him. The teenager seemed.. Displeased. Their conversation had been going well, Cub had managed to get Taurtis to open up a bit.

“Just remember Taurtis. Life could be a whole lot worse.?” Okay, now that he thinks about it, maybe that is not the best use of words. This was obviously proven when Taurtis started yelling.

“IM SORRY? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME!?” Cub tried to speak, but was immediately cut off by Taurtis, “Did YOUR best friend stab you!? Do YOU live with a psychopath? Are YOU threatened with a knife almost EVERY day?”

“I-” 

“YEAH sure life could be worse. BUT IT COULD ALSO BE A WHOLE LOT BETTER!”

~~~

There you go c:

ALSO! By the time this is read it's probably gonna be christmas eve c: that just makes me happy

~~~

#grian #hermitcraft #pearlescentmoon #samgladiator yhs #avian grian #sleepy0s #gtws #goodtimeswithscar #iskall85 #cubfan135 #yhs taurtis #taurtis

[blocksruinedme]

Extended flower husbands wip clip cause ao3's down

Final fic - Can't Take My Eyes Off of You

This is 2k and rated T, i think? It's the beginning of the fic, though i'm adding a cute bit about Jimmy's hair, so just know that he has a red streak in his hair he feels silly about. The fic will be rated E and something like 18k-20k long. It was going to be for the final round of Driving After Dark, the 18+ traffic life event, but it just kept getting longer. I won't quote the prompt here, but it's transmasc (but mostly labelless) jimmy at a rave full of LARPers. Here's a link to part of my author's note, explaining LARP and the concept of bleed (player/character emotions bleeding over). Credit to @toasted-cricket for describing outfits and a countertop. <3

(also, smallidarity (and bad boys) post-limited life wip on empires s2 and a silly smallidarity emp s2 one. and a modern SmallEtho fic that is "joel fretting cause he doesn't have a label for his relationship with Etho")

"Can't Take My Eyes Off of You" by BlocksRuinedMe

Jimmy had complicated feelings about clubs, raves, anywhere with heavy drinking and strangers dancing or being boisterous. Jimmy loved to party, he wanted to party, and tonight, like every time, he told himself that this time he’d have a single drink and get out and have fun. He’d take up Joel or Grian or Lizzie or Martyn on their gentle but persistent offers to stay with him, to make sure everything was okay. Or maybe he’d work up the courage to go dance sober.

And as always, Jimmy had gotten to the party, looked at the length of the line at the bar, and sent his friends away to have fun. (Though he didn’t know where Grian was tonight - he’d promised to show up. Must be late again.) Years ago it had been harder to convince people to leave him alone at these kinds of parties, that he wouldn’t rather be dragged out onto the floor by a group, or be at home, alone, when everyone else was having fun. Sometimes he was in a mood to just chat with anyone who wasn’t too close to the busiest parts of the crowd - and sometimes he really did want to hang out on the edge of things, drinking soda and possibly bar snacks. He knew it didn't match his personality at other events, but giant parties were hard. 

Tonight he had a lot on his mind, and kept to himself. He was pleased to be eating a lot of candy and snacks; he had eventually realized this party, or rave, or whatever this was, was in a warehouse people actually lived in (as unlikely and probably unsafe as that seemed). The kitchen – which only had two real walls and was to Jimmy less a ‘kitchen’ and more a ‘weird area with kitchen things’ -- seemed like a reasonable place to hide out. He knew people did that, they hung out in kitchens at parties, and it was full of candy, in bowls that were very… trippy? A lot of things here, especially the walls in the tiny bathroom next to the kitchen, looked “trippy” to him. Jimmy had no plans to ever do trippy drugs, but he couldn’t imagine looking at such intense images while tripping being any kind of fun.

While he ate a handful of chocolate pretzels, Jimmy considered he must be wrong, given they were literally called “trippy”; that was probably the point, somehow. He was wondering if he could find Sausage later to get him to explain how it worked when he heard a very familiar, and welcome, voice close to his ear - closer than he’d let most people get. 

“What’s a handsome guy like you doing at a rave like this?”

Scott.

In real world time, on phones and watches and calendars, in every thing that the outside world could count, it had been barely any time at all since Jimmy had last seen Scott, but in LARP time it felt like years had passed, years since he’d heard the voice of his husband. Jimmy was still switching from one to the other, trying to get through all his lingering feelings (both positive and negative) and make the “default world” feel normal, like it was his only home. He’d never had a husband here, that was a game… but not one he’d be forgetting anytime soon.

Jimmy spun around, grinning and chuckling. 

Scott was… before he could see anything else, Jimmy saw Scott was wearing his flower crown, his red poppy flower crown that looks so perfect resting on his ice blue hair. He was stunned, but tried to not show it, to not stare at the crown, to take in all of Scott. (Everyone knew Scott loved being appreciated.)

Everything about Scott looked perfect, as always - he had a sense of style Jimmy couldn’t even dream of posessessing. Tonight Scott was dressed in a flowing light pink shirt that sparkled faintly in the flashing lights, the waist cinched and showing off his figure. His pants were, of course, too tight, and left little to the imagination. He was gorgeous and far sexier than was fair to Jimmy, and probably many other people. 

But the crown.

When they’d talked during debrief, after all the dead characters reunited as players, Jimmy had said he was happy with the idea of Scott taking the flower crown Jimmy had given him back into the rest of his life, integrating it into his normal wardrobe and life, not keeping it on a shelf like Jimmy had planned to do with his. He loved that it was something special, something he wanted to hold onto, though it was a surprise. When Scott asked about his own, Jimmy had said he wasn’t sure, that he wanted to get back home and decide. Scott had seemed fine with that.

It was good, it was sweet, but Jimmy hadn’t expected him to wear it  so soon , to wear it when they… well, maybe Scott had already put it all aside. Maybe he wasn’t having any emotional bleed from their days of being husbands 24/7, maybe it was just a random fun costume piece and not a costume piece that meant something, the way it did to Jimmy.

Why should it be anything else to Scott? It was just a larp love plot, after all. They happened all the time, they both liked playing them. Bleed happened all the time as well, even when people didn’t see it, roleplay emotions bleeding over into whatever was “normal”. Jimmy had never thought too hard about it, just tried to get back to “normal” as soon as he could. What if he  didn’t want to put those feelings aside, not fully? 

“--Jimmy? You with me?”

 yes of course, always

“Oh jeez, Scott, I’m really sorry, I’m just so tired still, what did you say?”

Scott didn’t seem upset - he simply leaned in and kissed Jimmy on the cheek, which was  not something they’d done before they played 3rd Life - though Jimmy was certainly not objecting.  

“The handsome prince needs his beauty sleep!” 

Jimmy chuckled - even since they’d started LARPing together, Scott never had any trouble making Jimmy laugh. Not that it was hard, and he wasn’t (yet?) as good at it as Martyn, but Martyn had known Jimmy much longer than Scott, and Martyn was the funniest person Jimmy had ever known.

“I said.. well, the moment’s gone.” Scott was mock pouting, wanting to be begged, or something like that to keep going. Jimmy was happy to play his part - it was always easy playing with Scott. 

“No, Scott, please? I’m really sorry, I genuinely promise I really want to hear. ”

Scott sighed in a put upon manner that Jimmy didn’t take at all seriously.

“I said, ‘what’s my handsome husband doing out at a rave like this?’”

Husband?

Jimmy tried not to sound awkward around the very handsome man he had just spent days roleplaying being in love with. (Those romantic feelings that of course were not bleeding through now, and definitely hadn’t been a bad idea to play given how he’d already felt about Scott. Right.) 

“Oh, heh, what’s, um, my husband doing in a place like this? In a rave like this, basically at a rave, I mean. Um, you know?”

Scott laughed, and Jimmy laughed, and Jimmy forgot about trying not to be awkward, forgot about LARPs, forgot about everything except enjoying Scott’s company.

—--

“Do you like the crown? Does it make me look cute?”

“What? Oh, yeah, of course! It’s lovely, you honestly look amazing, Scott,  I would never give you something to wear that I thought would make you – I mean, actually nothing could make you look, not good, right? It looks great, especially with your… Did you touch up your hair?”

Scott beamed at Jimmy’s somewhat awkward compliments, and his very awkward attempt to change the conversation away from the fact that Scott had caught Jimmy staring at his flower crown, probably many times, over the last ten minutes.

“You noticed!” Scott gave Jimmy another kiss on the cheek, and Jimmy resisted the urge to turn his face, to try and catch Scott’s lips with his own. 

 They’d probably just bump noses or something. 

“I thought it looked wonderful, barely any roots!” Jimmy was being honest. You couldn’t even see them in the pictures they’d gotten at Martyn’s little post-game photoshoot setup. Jimmy knew, because he’d looked at them an embarrassing number of times, starting on the drive home.

“Weeeellllll, I wanted to look pretty tonight, who knows who you might find in a place like this? And dressed so… appropriately.”

Scott looked up and down Jimmy appraisingly, apparently approvingly. Jimmy had been perfectly happy to wear a white t-shirt and black skinny jeans, like he always did, but his tendency to go along with plans without thinking too hard had left him in... raver clothes. His black tank top was 50% mesh, and his black raver pants… there was just  so much pants. They jutted out and flared at the bottom, giving the silhouette of an oversized, slouched triangle, while the black denim was decorated by crossing straps, buckles, rivets, and chains. This pair had allegedly been worn by several people Jimmy had met – in one case, two at once, by a pair of “terribly tiny twinks” drunk at a party. 

They weren’t uncomfortable, and Jimmy didn’t feel like he was out-of-place… but they didn’t make him feel in-place either. 

Scott, however, had instantly made Jimmy feel very at home. The problem was that Jimmy  knew Scott was flirting, but Scott was  always flirting. Was there any chance this flirting was different? Jimmy had no idea how to even guess, and he was unwilling to try the (unprecedented) “don’t let Scott flirt with you” option. 

To his own surprise, Jimmy decided to go with “try to flirt back for real”. He didn’t have a clear goal; he just… missed his husband. 

“You might even run into your own husband, how awkward!” 

Jimmy didn’t know if his words were any good, but he tried to pitch his voice and hold himself in a way that other people did when flirting. (The majority of flirting in Jimmy’s life had not been  Jimmy trying to flirt; it had generally been directed at him, and usually not noticed by Jimmy until someone told him, or in the most important case, just kissed him.)

Scott stepped in closer, absently putting his cocktail down on sticky vinyl paper that was doing its best to turn some plywood into a countertop. It was covered in gunk and rings from drinks; Jimmy would be surprised if the whole thing wasn’t actually made up of at least 60% spilled beer.

“Hmm, was my husband sneaking out to have fun without me? Looking so hot, off to find some pretty new boy? Honeymoon over, bored so soon?”

Jimmy had no idea what was going on, but he’d do anything to keep it from stopping. Scott was looking Jimmy in the eyes - so intensely, but always with that air of plausible deniability. Jimmy didn’t want Scott to deny himself anything.

He couldn’t think of anything clever to say, so he reached out, adjusted Scott’s only barely askew flower crown, gently pulled his hands back and told the truth.

“Never.”

[End Note: the rest is hopefully coming this month!]

#me #my writing #wip wednesday #on an ao3-less monday #trafficshipping #flower husbands fic #flower husbands #trafficblr #shipping #ao3 is down

[nightgamergal]

So, I decided to make Etho's Fragments.

I'm not the best at Art, so it's probably mediocre at Best. I tried tho lol.

Anyways, the Fragments.

___________________________________________

Fragment 1: 3rdLife

In the shape of a Flame Shape from being Trapped in Fire 3 Times, He lost his First Life Trapped Behind a Wall of Fire while being Shot at by Tango. He was also shot with a barrage of flame arrows by 5 people in the desert, which resulted in the loss of his 2nd life. Some of those same people Burnt his home and his special tree; With the Fragment being located on his chest, that is because he was betrayed by and Later killed by Impulse who also used Flame Arrows, this resulted in The loss of his Final Life.

(Etho's Main Enemy Was fire this season, All 3 of his Deaths Involved Fire in one way or another whether it was just present during them or the cause of them.)

Fragment 2: LastLife

This one is on his ring finger in the shape of a ring to signify his relationship with Bdubs. It also branches out, due to the struggles and strain on their relationship. Etho's time with Bdubs was a significant part of his season.

(And I imagine Bdubs might have a similar one for this season as well. I'm not too sure, tho.)

Fragment 3: DoubleLife

His Third fragment is in the shape of a heart just above his heart, Because he was Soulbound to Joel, and they Stayed together Till the very End, Where They Went up in Flames Together, and the reaching branch is to signify a memory of his fishing rod boogie kill on scar in last life which he regretted later, this flashback took place when Grian was using the fishing rod on Joel and Etho, which resulted in the loss of their second life.

(And I believe Joel Would have a Similar one on his heart but without the branch.)

{I hope this Makes Sense)

Fragment 4: LimitedLife

This one is located on his right hand because that is the hand that held the axe of which was used to kill skizz who sacrificed his time to Etho. It extends in as a branch along his arm as a way to symbolize the pain of losing a close friend and as a signature of the number of times he died in quick succession.

Fragment 5: SecretLife

And Final one Is on his Right Ankle/Foot because, I imagine that while he was getting shot at by arrows while in the tower during session 9, and the arrows that hit him threw off his balance and made his leg buckle beneath him sending him tumbling off the edge where he took about 20 hearts of damage when he hit the ground, and it's on the right because he fell to his right, off the side of the tower bridge, I imagine he also may have fractured/broke his ankle in the process which is the reason he Mainly used enderpearls to flee, and once he ran out Scar caught him in no time, and took his Final life. Another thing is while he was fleeing, he fell down two small caves, which kinda adds to the possibility that he could have fractured his ankle, which threw him off balance as he fled.

(Also, during Scar's POV, Scar quoted, "He sounds like a wild animal that's been wounded"^"Let's put him out of his misery" while he was chasing Etho.)

{I Hope This Kinda makes Sense, there wasn't much for me to go on during this season.}

___________________________________________

Hopefully, the Fragments Make Sense. I tried to take the significant moments and get creative to figure out the fragments. I Rewatched Etho's whole series to also try and figure out the fragments. My sister also helped.

Anyway, again, I'm sorry that the art isn't the best. I hope it's decent nonetheless. And hopefully, it makes sense. 😅

#eaefragments #etho fanart

[medusasstory]

3rd Life Quotes Week 6: The Week Of War

SmallishBeans: I’m gonna head home because I’ve got a project I’m working on.

ZombieCleo: Is it your roof?

SmallishBeans: No, Scar’s gonna fix that, it’s a secret project.

ZombieCleo: Yeah. Do you believe Scar’s gonna fix that?

SmallishBeans: Uh, no, but I like to believe. He’s my best friend. I’m very deluded.

__

GoodTimesWithScar: I have so much to tell you. Cleo’s on our side, Joel’s on our side, Tango’s on our side.

Grian: You actually made friends?

__

Etho: My bloodline was not meant to continue.

__

ZombieCleo: Red’s are almost dead anyways, so I don’t mind. How is that going for you?

SolidarityGaming: Oh, you know. I don’t like going outside any more.

__

GoodTimesWithScar: Alright, I gotta go burn down Etho’s castle, and I’ll be back in a little bit! Then we can go over our plans? Okay?

Grian: Don’t die.

GoodTimesWithScar: Oh no no, I won’t die, but I will inflict pain upon them who hurt my heart.

__

Grian: Don’t go in the base. It is rigged to instantly explode.

GoodTimesWithScar: Oh, do you want me to test it?

__

GoodTimesWithScar: I can sing you a song?

ZombieCleo: How about I give you five arrows and you never do that.

__

GoodTimesWithScar: Did you see my skill with a bow?

TangoTek: I did not see it, but obviously it was the shot heard round the server.

Smajor: It was actually, it was a shot from a distance.

TangoTek: Well give me the play by play! Cause I’m not gonna lie, I think we’re all a little bit shocked when Scar defeats Etho.

__

InTheLittleWood: Incoming, incoming.

GoodTimesWithScar: That’s right! We’ve got our own *long pause* friends.

Grian: Did you forget the name for friends?

__

Etho: Dude, I don’t know about you. You’ve been sending me mixed messages lately.

TangoTek: How, what— what mixed message? Other than the arrow that killed you, but I mean, come on, let’s let bygones be bygones.

__

TangoTek: You’ve got to be ready. If he comes back, you’ve gotta lay him out.

Etho: Scar? You’re gonna die. I’m telling you right now.

__

GoodTimesWithScar: We played 4d chess with Etho, he was playing 3d chess.

__

TangoTek: A red Etho is no joke.

GoodTimesWithScar: Do you think he’s mad at me? He’s gonna come kill me?

TangoTek: Well, let’s see. Hold on, step one, you burned down his castle. Step two, you put an arrow in his face. I’m gonna guess you’re not at the top of his list of friends right now.

__

ZombieCleo: I know, I know, we’re your secret girlfriend.

Impulse: This plan is perfect, as long as no one finds out about it.

ZombieCleo: And no one dies.

__

InTheLittleWood: None of us know, Grian and Scar don’t know, Cleo doesn’t know— I’m starting to think it was you.

SolidarityGaming: Me?

Smajor: He’s done it in a sleepwalk, burnt his own wall.

SolidarityGaming: Me? Do you think I’m capable of burning a wall?

InTheLittleWood: I saw you burn yourself when trying to burn a banner last week, you’re fully capable of burning a wall, even on accident.

__

Skizzleman: Give us the banner and we’ll go.

GoodTimesWithScar: I need something in return.

Skizzleman: Your life, that’s what you get.

__

GoodTimesWithScar: I left the banner in the base, leave me alone!

Impulse: There is no banner here, he lied.

Skizzleman: Shocking.

__

Etho: realistically, where we’re at, everybody’s pretty much on their last life. So we only need one more gear of armour, right?

Tango: That’s a good point, how long are the villagers gonna be useful?

Impulse: That’s true.

Tango: Just make a backup set of armour now, and then who cares, right?

Impulse: We could do a ton of trading and slaughter the villagers.

Tango: no no, don’t slaughter them, leave them here as bait.

__

SmallishBeans: I just wanted something to burn like I did.

__

Etho: This is why you don’t give lighters to kids, everybody, this is what they do.

TangoTek: Right. Right. Or, Etho, the lesson might be this is why you don’t build castles out of wool. Y’know.

Etho: Noooo, it’s totally on the kid.

__

Etho: Somehow the kills are more satisfying when the person trusts you. It’s weird.

__

Smajor: Why are we trying to murder you?

Etho: I don’t know! I don’t know!

Smajor: You did something.

__

GoodTimesWithScar: Quick question, just innocently. I think we can all— y’know the big powers of the server, big machos— who burnt down the fence over there?

RenDog: This is the question of the session.

Etho: I know it was you, Scar.

InTheLittleWood: No one knows. We’re starting to think they did it themselves, just to throw discourse.

GoodTimesWIthScar: I burnt up my flint and steel on Etho’s castle, which is probably burning again because I made a new one.

__

Skizzleman: What do you want, King?

InTheLittleWood: What do you want, my lord?

ZombieCleo: Oh god they’re actually calling him king. Oh that’s really sad.

Smajor: That’s upsetting, that is. Y’all need a hobby.

__

Skizzleman: There is a tremendous amount of TNT inside, guys.

GoodTimesWithScar: It doesn’t work.

__

GoodTimesWithScar: I got the banner, guys. If you want it you can have it.

Etho: I do want it. I want that TNT so bad.

__

InTheLittleWood: The rules of engagement kinda just went out the window there. I just sort of saw red— on names and the fog of war, and I just left it. I just went for whoever I saw atop the wall.

__

ZombieCleo: Are you frightened of me, Etho?

Etho: Well, I’m just saying we have to be careful.

ZombieCleo: Yeah. And I am quite willing to suicide bomb. So that’s fine.

Etho: That’s not what I want to hear right now.

__

ZombieCleo: What happened? Why are you all so stressed?

Impulse: Well. Somebody burnt down our wool fortress today.

Etho: Yep.

Impulse: So that kinda put on us edge a little bit.

Etho: Somebody killed me. Like five people, all at once.

__

ZombieCleo: That’s why I’m quite happy to take out my life, if it’ll take out Etho.

__

ZombieCleo: What I’m saying Impulse, is that you have— you’ve betrayed people at this point.

Impulse: Not everyone!

ZombieCleo: No, but all the people that you went after.

Impulse: Yeah. I’ve never shot at you though, you know that.

ZombieClep: Why did your arrow hit me then?

Impulse: Did it? Oh that was lag.

ZombieCleo: Okay, it was lag.

__

Smajor: My thought process, if we’re kinda on the same wavelength, was either that we trade with them, to get our stuff, or we murder them.

SolidarityGaming: *pause* Yeah. So. What’s the vibe? What’s the route you want to go down?

__

SolidarityGaming: If we use the villagers, will you say anything?

ZombieCleo: Only if you end up trying to betray me.

SolidarityGaming: No no no.

Smajor: Oh god no.

__

SolidarityGaming: Scar! What’s happening?

GoodTimesWithScar: Okay, huge issue, I should have come sooner— your base is burning down.

__

Smajor: I was trying to think who we could actually get as an alliance, and literally with you and the Crastle I thought that might be a hard sell, because the last three sessions they have tried to take down the Crastle.

ZombieCleo: So has everybody else. Etho’s tried it, and Joel. And now we’re in the Black Book with Ren. So y’know, the enemy of my enemy is my enemy’s enemy, but also someone I can do business with.

__

ZombieCleo: If they’re not at Dogwarts, what do we do? Steal? Cause I know where their gubbins used to be.

Smajor: See? Other people like to steal, it’s not just me!

__

SmallishBeans: Jimmy, do you wanna know something? Took the banner down myself.

Smajor: He took the banner down himself! He took the banner down himself! That’s embarrassing for you.

SolidarityGaming: You losers!

ZombieCleo: You lose, good day sir!

__

Smajor: Scar’s also great with a bow, as Etho can attest.

__

Smajor: Do I murder these villagers?

ZombieCleo: Yeah, go on. Leave them without resources.

__

Smajor: Thanks for the free anvils, you idiot.

__

InTheLittleWood: Do you like hot dogs? That’s what we’re serving up over here, dude.

SmallishBeans: Stop killing my dogs!

__

SmallishBeans: You should watch your back this episode, seeing as you’ve got no Bdubs to protect you any more, by the way. Be uh, very careful.

ZombieCleo: I’ve three lives to protect me. If somebody tries to take me down, I’m taking ‘em down with me. I’ve got suicide bombs. I’ve got this crossbow, and this crossbow, and this wisp—

SmallishBeans: OKAY, maybe you shouldn’t be messed with. Thank you for burning my house down, thank you for the bow, let’s be friends.

__

SmallishBeans: Now on my red life, I may just sew some random acts of chaos, such as burning that bridge. Because I can, as everyone is my enemy.

__

SmallishBeans: What’s the point of having a wall if you’re not gonna stay within its confines?

__

ZombieCleo: We’re arsonists! We’re arsonists, not liars.

__

SmallishBeans: Who keeps putting light grey stained glass in my furnaces?

__

Smajor: Hey, Joel! Joel Beans.

SmallishBeans: Hey Scott, how’s it going?!

Smajor: You realize your trap just gave me anvils?

SmallishBeans: It didn’t work?

__

Smajor: You’re forgetting, you’ve decided to make allies of the people that do have lots of enchantments, whereas you don’t.

SmallishBeans: Ah, it’s true, but what I do have is spirit, am I right?

ZombieCleo: Yeah, and no allies.

Smajor: No allies, cause you’ve angered the Dogwarts people too.

SmallishBeans: I’ve got Scar!

ZombieCleo: Yeah. We’ve got Scar. There’s more of us than of you.

__

ZombieCleo: So we’re all in agreement— kill Martyn.

__

SmallishBeans: <64 dead bushes to the person who brings me InTheLittleWood’s head>

InTheLittleWood: My lord! I’ve got a bounty! That’s how you know I’m dangerous!

Smajor: <I’ll add ten diamonds>

SolidarityGaming: <+ a stack of iron>

InTheLittleWood: They want me, dude!

ZombieCleo: <and a stack of emeralds>

__

Grian: There’s enough TNT in there to blow up most of the lower floor.

GoodTimesWithScar: Is it a little tempting just to throw something at it, for fun?

Grian: It is very tempting, but don’t.

__

Grian: I’ve been gone 20 minutes, and that’s the longest I’ve ever left Scar on his own.

GoodTimesWithScar: Red alert! Red alert!

__

SolidarityGaming: He must be low— he’s going!

Etho: Oh dear.

Grian: Get him!

SolidarityGaming: I’ve hit him! I’ve hit him once!

Smajor: He must be low. Cut him off!

Chat: <Etho was shot by GoodTimesWithScar>

Grian: Yes! Yes, Scar!

Smajor: Yeahhhhh!

Grian: King! King! King! King!

SolidarityGaming: The new King!

GoodTimesWithScar: We did it, we did it!

__

InTheLittleWood: I’m a little bit exhausted, I kinda want to cool the jets this week.

__

Skizzleman: I’ll tell you right now, I started to feel a little bit bad about the murder of Pizza. That lasted like two seconds, then I was gleeful. I’m glad we did it. I’m glad we did it, gentlemen.

__

RenDog: Me mama once told me, on the beaches of the Black Isle, that if ye fail to prepare, ye prepare to fail.

InTheLittleWood: Oooooo. That’s actually really poetic.

RenDog: *laughter*. My mother didn’t actually tell me that, I heard it on some crypto channel.

__

BigB: Ten cookies? You guys are amazing. *sniffles* Finally I’m part of a team!

InTheLittleWood: Alright, you’re milking it now, you’re milking it. I know milk needs to go with cookies, but you’re milking it. Get out of here.

__

InTheLittleWoods: I saw a green name over here, who was it? I saw a green name over yonder.

RenDog: I did see a green name— why have I switched me accent?

InTheLittleWoods: What have you become?

ZombieCleo: Why have you switched your accents?

InTheLittleWoods: We’re having a bit of an identity crisis happening over here.

__

InTheLittleWood: Go on, make it a show, I dare ya.

ZombieCleo: I mean, I’ll give you a hint— it’s piercing. So your shield means nothing to me. And you guys mean nothing to me.

__

RenDog: Cleo with the fire!

ZombieCleo: Always with the fire.

__

Chat: <Etho was shot by GoodTimesWithScar>

RenDog: Dude!

InTheLittleWood: Oh my god, Scar just got a kill?

RenDog: Etho was shot by Scar?

InTheLittleWood: I’m more surprised that Scar killed somebody else, rather than himself, that’s unreal!

RenDog: That is unreal.

__

Etho: I’ve got some intel, by the way. Their bows were doing five damage to me. They are geared up.

InTheLittleWood: And that was through diamond armour.

RenDog: That’s Power V. They have Power V.

Etho: They also had Flame.

__

Smajor: Also, Joel, speaking of burning stuff down. Did you happen to have a meeting with a flint and steel and our wall?

SmallishBeans: Uh, no. I saw it burning though, as I was walking past.

Smajor: Why did so many people walk past and not decide to pop a message in chat? Like hey, by the way, your wall’s burning? Twice? Twice! Do you know how long it took me to make that wall?

SmallishBeans: Do you know how long it took me to make this roof?

Smajor: Less than the wall!

ZombieCleo: Look, look, look, we discussed. We discussed.

Smajor: Whoever— when I find out who it was, by the comment section ratting someone out, you’re in for it, by the way.

__

Skizzleman: What’s that thing called when you get close to your captor?

InTheLittleWood: Oh, uh, Stockholm Syndrome.

Skizzleman: Yes, Stockholm’s, that’s what’s going on.

InTheLittleWood: Grian has that BAD.

__

InTheLIttleWood: Wait, what’s that sound?

Grian: That’s Etho with a note block.

InTheLittleWood: Jeez. I thought that was some kind of precursor to doom.

__

SolidarityGaming: I did not burn the wall! Not a chance.

InTheLittleWood: There is literally one player left unaccounted for now, and that’s Tango.

SolidarityGaming: Yeah but you could have lied. Any of you could have lied!

__

Skizzleman: Martyn, make this promise to me: before we die, you and me play paint ball together.

InTheLittleWood: Absolutely.

__

InTheLittleWood: I looked em dead in the eyes and I said “2v1, let’s go”.  They both got scared and they logged off.

__

BigB: It probably would be smart if I made my own enchanting table, because then I technically won’t need anyone else’s enchanting table.

__

InTheLittleWood: Where were you during all the fiasco of last week? You must have seen the chat filling up with death and destruction.

BigB: Dude, I didn’t see anyone the whole time. I found so many emeralds and diamonds though. Everyone was dying up top, I was down below just chilling.

__

BigB: I don’t have any other options, so I guess I’m in?

InTheLittleWood: Fantastic. I mean, to be honest, we are the Blue Sword Boys. Don’t know what we’re doing about the third Blue Sword Boy, I think we’ve lost him for now.

BigB: He’s on the dark side.

__

BigB: The end of this series, this is how I envision it playing out. It’s going to be like that movie, I Am Legend. Everyone’s gonna be like, crazy angry, and red and infected— almost like zombies, it feels like— and I’m just going to be the only survivor, here.

__

ZombieCleo: I brought you an apology present.

SmallishBeans: Eh, you’re playing with fire here Cleo. Like you were last time, but now I’m the fire.

__

SmallishBeans: I might change my mind, I am a bit chaotic like that.

ZombieCleo: I mean, you’re speaking to me. I understand chaos.

__

ZombieCleo: Impulse is kinda a friend to everybody. Because he cannot make up his mind.

__

ZombieCleo: You’re going to try and kill me, is that what you’re saying?

InTheLittleWood: Not today, not tomorrow— because we only record once a week— but maybe next week!

__

GoodTimesWithScar: Cleo! Are you interested in becoming friends at no cost to you? Up front?

__

Smajor: See, now that I’m aware— don’t get me wrong, I’m glad Joel is on our side. But also at the same time, he did betray them very easily, which does worry me.

ZombieCleo: Oh yeah. There are alliances that you can trust, and there are alliances that are convenient.

Smajor: Yeah.

ZombieCleo: So for example— you guys I trust.

Smajor: Yeah! And Joel is convenient.

ZombieCleo: So is Grian and Scar. They’re quite convenient.

__

Skizzleman: Are we all gonna stand here and learn from nothing? It was Scar!

GoodTimesWithScar: This isn’t Among Us. Just because I found a body doesn’t mean I murdered them!

__

SolidarityGaming: I feel bad for Scar, we just bailed and left him. Grian, you’re supposed to be helping Scar!

Grian: I can’t! Sometimes Scar just can’t be helped.

__

ZombieCleo: Stop it, Etho! The next time that happens, I dump the lava bucket and we both go.

__

GoodTimesWithScar: When a British person says “honestly”, they’re lying, by the way.

__

InTheLittleWood: Pizza wasn’t real, but he did deserve it.

__

Smajor: I’m Merida with a bow, why are you trying to fight me with this?

__

Smajor: We are here, ready to do whatever happens today. Could be murder, could not be. I don’t know. I’m just hoping I don’t die.

__

Smajor: If you wanted to trade with our villager, you could just say. That’s fine.

GoodTimesWithScar: I could have just said?

Smajor: Yeah. You’re an ally, Scar.

GoodTimesWithScar: I’m used to hostility.

__

ZombieCleo: What do you say the Hobbits and the Crastle form a side alliance?

SolidarityGaming: Alliance!?

Smajor: Oh, Jimmy.

SolidarityGaming: Did I hear the word alliance?

ZombieCleo: Okay, okay. You’re really frightened about red, aren’t you.

SolidarityGaming: Yeah, I’m pretty sad. I’m pretty yeah.

ZombieCleo: See, Bdubs is all “I’m going to kill people!”

Smajor: Yeah, whereas Jimmy is more like a lost puppy.

__

Smajor: I just don’t understand why he’d burn down the wall though, he doesn’t gain anything.

Impulse: Maybe he just had like a lust to burn things today?

ZombieCleo: I mean, that is a thing. That is a real thing.

__

GoodTimesWithScar: Obviously I could never have set the fire, because I used up my flint and steel burning down Etho’s castle. Look, my bucket is empty of lava, and my flint and steel is no more!

__

Smajor: The one thing I’m getting from this, is that Dogwarts is left currently unprotected.

Grian: Oh yeah. Oh Yeah! That’s so true!

SolidarityGaming: Let’s go, let’s go!

ZombieCleo: Let’s burn this bitch down.

Grian: Let’s wreck the place, I’ve got TNT on me.

__

SolidarityGaming: Do you want some of this?! Want some of this?!

Smajor: Jimmy, you’re gonna die. Jimmy, you’re on two hp.

__

#3rd life SMP #3rdLifeSmp #3rdlife #3rdlife quotes #TrafficBlr #Traffic Series

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

3rd life Villain!Impulse perhaps? Reasoning because he's been so nice to all factions and appears very harmless...until he kills Tango in the firing squad scenario. Do with that as you will :3

honestly i think the villain 3rd Life AUs are some of my best writing. also i’m pretty sure i’m gonna end up writing everyone as a villain at some point lol (villains so far: Scar, Etho, Tango, Grian, Ren, Martyn, now Impulse. Joel too if you count that fic where he kills Jimmy)

…

A feeling of dread hangs over Impulse as he makes his way up to Tango’s base. Getting a private message from his best friend, simply saying “we need to talk”, has highly unsettled him. He has absolutely no idea what Tango could want to talk to him about.”

As he gets to the hill Tango calls home, he spots Tango himself standing at the top, arms folded, clearly watching him. A shiver running down his spine, Impulse slowly climbs up the hill. Tango watches him all the way.

Finally, he gets to the top. Keeping an eye on the sun, which must be about an hour away from setting, he gives his friend a wave. “Hi, Tango. What’s… What’s going on?”

Tango’s looking at him with a narrow-eyed expression of distrust. “I know your game, Impulse.”

“Huh?” Impulse blinks. That’s not what he was expecting. “What?”

“Your little game of pretending to be allies with everyone so nobody will ever turn against you. Etho, Dogwarts, the crastle folk. You’ve got them all wrapped round your little finger.”

Impulse frowns. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Tango rolls his eyes. “Uh huh, ‘course you don’t. You change the sheet music for everyone, don’t you? Everyone believes they’re the only one getting your support. Well, not me. I know what you’re up to and I’m gonna make sure you stop getting away with it, starting today.”

As Tango turns to start walking away, Impulse grabs his wrist, stopping him from leaving. “Please don’t, Tango,” he says calmly.

Tango scoffs. “Let go of me, Impulse. I’m gonna expose you whether you like it or not.”

Impulse hangs on to Tango’s wrist. “I’m giving you one last chance to back down. You’re red; if something happens to you, you won’t come back.”

“You’re not gonna stop me,” Tango retorts. “I know you. Your niceness has always been your biggest weakness, and in this case, it’s gonna be your downfall.”

“You’ve misjudged me.”

Impulse abruptly seizes Tango’s lapels and roughly swings him closer to the edge of the cliff, holding him dangerously close to the precipice. “I‘ll do anything to survive,” Impulse says coldly. “Anything.”

Tango’s eyes widen with shock. “Impulse-!”

But Impulse shoves him off the top of the cliff.

He waits for a few seconds, listening to Tango’s screams get quieter and quieter, until they’re abruptly cut off.

Tango fell from a high place

Taking a deep breath, Impulse takes off running. He doesn’t know if there’s anyone nearby but he can’t risk it. If anyone sees him here, he’s done for. Absolutely done for.

The chat is filling up with confused and concerned messages but it doesn’t matter now. Tango is gone forever. Nobody ever needs to know what happened.

Impulse dashes back towards the wool castle but as he passes Tango’s still-gushing lava minigame, he bumps into Etho, who’s running the other way.

“Impulse!” Etho breathes. “Gosh, you scared me. What happened?”

Despite internally panicking quite hard, Impulse manages to stammer, “I-I dunno, I was just going to Tango’s base to talk to him when I saw the message. I thought he might have been somewhere around here but I couldn’t find any dropped items or anything. He must’ve been somewhere else when he died.”

“Tango doesn’t just fall from a high place like that,” Etho says. “He’s careful. Impulse, I’m worried that someone might have murdered him.”

“What?!” Impulse gasps. “Who would do that?!”

“I don’t know for sure, but my prime suspect is the crastle alliance. Bdubs had it out for Tango for some reason so I’m sure he knows something.”

“Oh no…” Impulse stares at his friend with wide, innocent eyes. “Bdubs wouldn’t have taken TWO of Tango’s lives… would he?”

Etho slowly shakes his head. “I don’t know. I thought I knew our friends really well but lately, I…” He sighs quietly. “Let’s just say I wouldn’t put it past him. But it’s getting late; I’ll go talk to him tomorrow.”

He turns back towards the castle. “You coming?”

“I‘ll be there later. I’m just gonna go check on my villagers.”

“Gotcha. And Impulse…”

Impulse pauses as Etho glances back at him. “Thanks for being the only person on this server I can really trust.”

Impulse smiles back. “No problem.”

…

Under the cover of darkness, Impulse makes his way to the crastle. He can see Cleo up on the roof, aiming a crossbow at him, but thankfully, she lowers it when he gets close enough for her to see who he is.

Cleo and Bdubs let Impulse into the crastle. “What’s going on, Impulse?” Bdubs demands. “Nobody seems to know what happened to Tango!”

“Nobody’s owning up to knowing, anyway,” Cleo adds. “I don’t suppose you do?”

Impulse shakes his head. “I’ve no idea. But I’ve heard rumours going round the server and I thought I should come to you directly to let you know.”

“Let us know what?” Bdubs says.

“That Etho suspects you guys had something to do with Tango’s death.”

“What?!”

Bdubs and Cleo exchange a shocked look.

“Why would he think that?!” Bdubs snaps. “He has no evidence!”

“That’s why I thought I should come over and warn you,” says Impulse. “He’s gonna come over here tomorrow to confront you about it.”

“Oh gawsh…” Bdubs groans. “Thanks for telling us.”

“Oh, but this is just to give you some warning to prepare. You can’t let Etho know I told you, okay? Otherwise he might not tell me other stuff that concerns you guys.”

“Don’t worry, we won’t,” Cleo says. “If we’re your secret girlfriend, does that mean Etho’s your… uh… spouse?”

“I don’t really have a singular “spouse”,” responds Impulse, making air quotes over the word “spouse”. “More like the rest of the server is my “spouse” and I can’t let them know that I favour you over them.”

“Riiiight, gotcha. Guess you’d better head home before your “spouse” misses you.”

Impulse nods. “Yeah, I gotta go back to Etho. See you guys later.”

As he leaves the crastle and starts to head for home, he spots a figure watching him from next to one of Bdubs’s tall spruce trees. When the figure comes forward, Impulse recognises the person as Joel.

“Hi,” he says, giving a friendly smile. Joel isn’t one of his official allies at the moment but that doesn’t mean he can’t be nice to him. “What’s up?”

“I heard Tango died,” Joel says, eyes sparking with interest. “Do you know what happened?”

“No, I don’t. I just saw it in chat.”

“I think you’re lying.”

Impulse blinks. “What?”

Joel grins as he senses he’s caught Impulse off guard. “I said I think you’re lying. I think you’re manipulating everyone into believing you’re their friend when in actuality, you don’t care about any of them. And I think you killed Tango when he confronted you about it. Am I wrong?”

Impulse stares at him, unable to say anything in his defence.

In the ensuing pause, Joel takes a sudden step towards Impulse, who backs up a few steps, his hand automatically flying to the hilt of his sword. But he pauses. He has to be extremely careful here; Bdubs and Cleo may be watching him. If they see him put a single foot wrong here, it’s over. He has to let Joel make the first move.

“Would you kill me?” says Joel challengingly. “Would you kill me as callously as you killed Tango?”

Impulse carefully turns his back to the crastle and narrows his eyes. “Come and find out. Or would you rather die stupidly and pointlessly because you forgot about FIRE DAMAGE?”

That does it. Impulse knew exactly how to rile Joel up and it works. Eyes flashing red, Joel growls and lashes out with his fist.

Impulse allows himself to be hit in the chin, narrowly avoiding biting his tongue. Joel’s second blow, this time to the stomach, winds him and causes him to drop to his knees, vulnerable. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Joel drawing his sword. This is it; this is the moment. Either his position on the server will elevate… or he will simply die.

He holds his breath and squeezes his eyes shut.

“GET AWAY FROM HIM!”

An arrow flies out of nowhere and buries itself in Joel’s chest, causing him to stagger back a step. A split second later, a second arrow hits Joel in the neck, and that’s all it takes.

SmallishBeans was shot by BdoubleO100

Impulse stares at the ground where Joel had landed, a second before he died. He can’t believe his plan worked so well.

“Impulse, are you okay?” Bdubs appears at Impulse’s side, discarding his crossbow. “What happened?”

“He… He was gonna kill me,” Impulse chokes out. This isn’t entirely an act; Joel’s unexpected hit to his stomach has completely snatched the wind from his sails.

“Why? Why did he wanna kill you?”

“Did he really need a reason?” Cleo says. “He was red and Impulse is green. Nuff said.”

“Wh-Whatever it was, you guys saved my life.” Impulse gives them a smile. “Thanks. If Etho or anyone else asks what happened, you guys spotted me getting attacked by Joel on my way back from checking on my villagers. Okay?”

“Ooh, good story,” Bdubs says approvingly. “But are you sure you’re okay? You’re not hurt, are you?”

“No, no, I’m fine. Thanks to you guys. I should probably head home, though.”

Bdubs pats him on the shoulder. “Yeah, go get some rest. Thanks again for… um… coming past and not visiting.”

Impulse nods, knowing exactly what Bdubs means. “No worries.”

…

“Joel just attacked you?” Etho frowns. “Why would he do that?”

“He doesn’t need a reason,” responds Impulse, recalling what Cleo said earlier. “He was red. I guess he just saw an easy target and couldn’t resist.”

“So he attacked you on your way back from the villagers, huh. And you’re okay, right? You’re not hurt.”

“No, I’m fine,” says Impulse. “A little shaken and tired from everything that’s happened, though.”

“Oh yeah, you should get some sleep.” Etho smiles at his friend. “See you tomorrow.”

“Night, Etho.”

As Impulse gets into bed in his room, he can’t help a small smile. He took a big risk today but it has really paid off. Getting rid of two red lifers in one day is enough of an accomplishment in of itself, but doing it without arousing suspicion on himself AND managing to turn Etho and Bdubs further against each other? That’s something he can be proud of.

All he needs to do now is make sure he’s in the right place at the right time for Etho’s confrontation with Bdubs tomorrow and perhaps he can be there for another red life death. Bdubs may be one of his strongest allies but if Impulse sees a chance to get another player out of the game, well…

He’s going to take it.

#3rd life smp #3rdlifesmp #impulsesv #etho #ethoslab #bdubs #bdoubleo100 #zombiecleo #smallishbeans #tangotek #vaunna’s requests

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

[COMPLETE]

Hrrmitcraft AU (Hermitcraft villager AU)

...this started as a throwaway joke, but I guess we're doing this for real now! Might as well go with it. (I'm going to put summaries instead of direct quotes this time to help with length)

- The Hermits all live in or near a large Minecraft village

- Xisuma is a wandering trader who stops by every few days to trade and share stories of his travels. Nobody really knows where he lives, and they've never seen him actually sleep.

- Cleo was zombified a while ago and cured only partially. She is safe to be around now, but she still looks like a zombie and has occasional thoughts of attacking her neighbors.

- Stress is a witch who got lonely and moved into the village with her cat.

- Cub and Scar are villagers who were turned into illagers (1/10 chance of happening when a villagers health is brought low enough). It is unknown whether this was an accident, or if they orchestrated the incident in an effort to gain Evoker powers.

- Grian is a nitwit who spends his time pranking the others

- Joe works two jobs as a leatherworker and a librarian. Why? So he can have both a lecturn and a full cauldron.

- Beef is a butcher

- Impulse is a workaholic carrot farmer who just. Doesn't. Stop.

- Zedaph is also a farmer, but he spends most of his time 'farming' things that aren't actually farmable in the hopes of discovering a new crop

- Doc is a cleric, and so was Cub before becoming an illager. They take a scientific approach to potion brewing, and they developed the potion that cured Cleo. (Cub is still pretending to be a cleric after becoming an Evoker to blend in. Doc hasn't noticed yet.)

- False is a reformed pillager who now guards the Hermit village, crossbow at the ready.

- Iskall is a weaponsmith

- Bdubs is a mason. He really likes fancy and interesting blocks, and he's one of the first and most excited to greet Xisuma when he comes back with new trades

- Mumbo was originally an armourer, but he switches jobs a lot. Nothing really seems to fit, and he's a bit distracted by trying to mess with the redstone Stress gives him sometimes. He hasn't managed to create anything usable yet, but he's heard players can, and he's determined to try.

- Mumbo likes to help out when the others are overwhelmed with their own jobs, since he doesn't have a set profession

- Zedaph lives next to the sheep pen and has an understanding with them. He's figured out how to lead them with wheat and he uses them in pranks sometimes.

- in his experimenting, Zed discovered how to farm mushrooms in caves. He now gives them to Beef for making stew.

- in addition to being a cleric, Doc is also an armourer and the only one mentioned so far with the ability to make redstone work. He uses this skill to make cybernetics for anyone who needs them. He must have made some deal with something powerful to get his abilities extended like this, but at this point it's unclear who or what that might be or what the cost of the arrangement was.

- Beef isn't actually a shepherd, but he really wants to be. He spends a lot of time with llamas, getting them to trust him. He especially likes hanging out with X's llamas when he's in town, even if it makes him run a little behind on his travel schedule.

- Doc got his arm when a player found him injured after a creeper accident and decided to fix him up. He learned redstone using the arm as an example, but was missing the ability of a player to actually make it work. He made a deal (implied to be with Herobrine) at great personal cost to recieve this power. (Unclear exactly what that price was)

- there is at least one player in the Hrrmitcraft world, but the Hermit village is very far from spawn so the player has never been there. Doc and possibly Xisuma are the only ones who have seen the player.

(edit: there are two players in the world: the more compassionate one Doc encountered, and a much more efficiency-minded one who imprisoned Wels in a trading hall)

- Bdubs goes around the village every night making sure everyone is indoors and safe from mobs. He ends his rounds each day with the long, excruciating task of trying to get Impulse to stop farming and actually go to bed. He is hilariously and annoyingly persistent.

- as a consequence of his deal, Doc is very slowly developing creeper-like traits (an aversion to cats, slight gunpowder smell, green veins creeping up his arm). He hides it from the others and tries his best to deny or ignore it. (This may not be the only or the most severe consequence, but it is the most immediate)

- Grian has a pet parrot that X brought him from a far away jungle. He talks to it and has trained it to do simple tasks like pulling levers.

- Cleo used to be a leatherworker before her zombification, but can't do it now

- Tango is an iron golem who was accidentally given the ability to speak. He protects the village with False and hangs out near the farms with Impulse and Zedaph

- Keralis is an ex-wandering trader who got tired of life on the road and settled down. He used to travel with Xisuma sometimes, or at least their paths would cross often. Now, Keralis is a mason who spends his spare time trying to figure out bees.

- Etho is a cartographer who keeps to himself, often going days without seeing anyone other than Beef, Bdubs, and Doc. Xisuma uses his maps on his travels, and is willing to overlook how impossibly accurate they are in spite of Etho never being seen leaving the village.

- xB is a fisherman who's heard tale of Guardians in the deep waters. He wants to go find them, but Xisuma won't let him, fearing for his safety on the open sea and on the journey to get there.

- Wels uses his experience of being zombified and cured over and over again to help Doc and Cub cure Cleo

- Hypno is a fisherman, and he has a rivalry with Jevin the leatherworker. They argue over which is the smelliest after a long day of work.

- Hypno and xB talk on the docks sometimes while mending nets and lines. Hypno claims to have traveled the sea before, but won't say what happened. The hope of hearing the story gives xB a reason to stay, and the way Hypno gets when he asks about what happened gives him a bit more caution about following the horizon just yet.

- Ren is a shepherd. He's named all of his sheep, and his house is the first place they go for shelter in a storm. He has multiple outfits that he makes out of their dyed wool, and he loves to try out new colour combinations. He may or may not have taken some of Jevin's dyes for this....

- Joe picked up leatherworking after Cleo's zombification, since her fingers are now too stiff for delicate tasks. She's still very knowledgable though, so they work together a lot. Being able to keep doing her job with a friend is one of the main reasons she was able to accept and adjust to her new way of life.

- Evil X is a pillager captain who tricked Xisuma into leading his patrol to their village. They camped out on the edge of town and started launching raids on and off for several weeks. Tired of the attacks and feeling guilty for his part in causing them, Xisuma eventually lead the patrol on a chase after himself and trapped them in a cave.

- Scar was a cartographer before he became an Evoker, and he still does some of the work. Etho is the only one who knows his secret, and he's agreed to keep it if Scar helps him with mapmaking. Scar is the one to research for the details of the maps, since hostile mobs see him as one of their own, so he can leave the village safely.

- TFC is a (technically) retired weaponsmith who moved to the Hermit village after his own village died out. He makes weapons to help False guard the town, and he has a friendly rivalry with Iskall.

- TFC started out as a toolsmith, changing jobs after he left his original village. Before that, he made pickaxe after pickaxe and dreamed of exploring the caves, even though he knew it was far too dangerous.

(this AU was created by multiple lovely people through asks! I encourage you to scroll through the #Hrrmitcraft AU tag to see more details)

#hcraft #hermitcraftheadcanons #hermitcraft #hermitblr #mod shade #Hrrmitcraft AU #i still don't really know why this is happening but I'm here for it #long post

[hermits-that-craft]

Night AU - Chapter 52 - Arc 2 - Relost

AO3:https://archiveofourown.org/works/23509375/chapters/66540838 I’m sorry it took so long!

“You two are idiots.” Tango laughs breathlessly. “I can’t believe you got away with that.”

“But they did!” Zedaph cheers, smiling.

“Dude shh you’re going to wake up the hermits!” Scar stage whispers, and Cub snorts under his breath. Etho hums a song to himself, listening to Impulse and Scar play catch up with the others. 

“I can’t believe Scar has a god mode but I don’t.” Zedaph whines playfully. “I think I deserve a god mode.”

“I don’t know how to activate god mode though.” Scar says, hanging upside down off his bed. 

“Void nerfed you because you’d be too powerful” Cub says sagely, nodding his head as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“They nerfed you!” Tango cackles, falling off the bed as he laughs. Zedaph and Impulse soon follow suit, either sitting on the floor with Tango or getting dragged off the bed by the other two.

“We’re coming for you Cub!” Zedaph cackles, shuffling towards Cub’s bed. The older men quickly jumps onto his bed, standing on top of it as though his life depended on it. Etho snickers in the corner, watching as Scar is dramatically dragged to the floor by Tango.

“The floor is lava.” The words barely leave Etho’s mouth before the hermits are clinging to beds and fences as though their lives depend on it, all shooting half hearted glares at Etho.

“I thought you were asleep!” Scar says, hanging off of the fence post that the lantern is held up by.

“I didn’t think you could jump that high!” Etho counters, and the group laughs, Scar slowly lowering himself to the ground.

“Well sometimes you just gotta up you know?”

“‘Well sometimes you just gotta up.’” Zedaph quotes. “Wise words from mister GoodtimeswithScar.”

Everyone pauses, dread replacing the joy as their communicators hum in unison. Scar and Impulse both immediately shake their heads, not willing to find out if Doc or Ren are dead, or worse. No one wants to look, to find out the terrible news. To find out if a friend is dead. Killed and respawned, or their body found somewhere. Cub pulls Scar into a comforting hug, though nothing on his face could be described as anything but horrified. Zedaph taps Impulse’s hands gently, grounding the man. Tango looks at Etho, pleading with him to check with his eyes. Etho nods, and Tango lets out a relieved sigh as Etho pulls out his communicator. Horror fills his stomach, fear overtaking his common sense and brain as he reads, and rereads, the notifications. Tears slip out of his eyes, and vomit threatens to force its way out of his throat.

TheJungle has entered the server.

TheJungle: Night, I want the nHo back. I will join you if you give them to me. TheNight: I already have 1/ 4 ready for you. TheJungle: Omw

“Good news and bad news, everyone.” Etho says, his voice soft. “Night doesn’t have Doc or Beef anymore.”

“The bad news?” Tango’s voice sounds like it's traveling through a wall of honey, but Etho swallows, trying to force the fear and tears down his throat.

“The jungle is back.”

---

Iskall and Etho walk along the edge of the shopping district, Iskall quietly testing his new robotic arm. It’s been painted white, and it responds well to his movements, though he leans towards it as he walks. Etho keeps an eye on his, helping him adjust to the new weight.

“It’s kind of funny,” Iskall murmurs. “I just got used to not having the weight of an arm, and now I have to get used to the weight of one again.”

“It’s heavier than a norm- a non-robotic arm.” Etho catches himself, reminding them both that this arm is Iskall’s new normal. “So you’re going to have to get stronger.”

“Are you saying that I’m not strong.” Iskall jokingly asks.

“Yes.” Etho depans, before dodging a punch from the ex assassin. “Am I wrong?”

“Yes! Yes you are wrong!” Iskall pushes Etho gently. “I am amazing and strong and you all are weak compared to me.”

“Yessir.” Etho nods, pushing Iskall back. The pair laugh, turning around the hill before they freeze.

Doc leans on the side of the hill, his eye wide and fearful as he watches Etho and Iskall. His metal arm is gone, wires poking out of the gaping hole in his shoulder where the arm should be. Redstone, or perhaps blood, covers what is left of his lab coat. It’s torn to shreds, there’s barely anything left of the fabric that Doc took such good care of.

“Doc?” Etho asks, his voice quiet. “Doc, are you alright?”

“I need to go back.” Doc sways in the breeze. “I need to get Ren out. Oh Void, they’re going to slaughter Ren.”

“Doc you’re not making any sense.” Etho says, slowly walking towards his friend. Iskall looks at his new arm, frowning as his gaze hits the claps. “I’m sure Ren is going to be-”

“Take my arm.” Iskall says, his hand undoing one of the claps. “Get Ren back.”

“Iskall-”

“Get my friend back, Doc.” Iskall struggles with the arm, Doc helping his detach it from his body. Iskall helps Doc to attach it to his arm, Etho spluttering in the background. Etho watches and Doc pulls Iskall into a hug, a tear falling from his eye.

“I will. I’ll get Ren back.” Doc promises. 

Iskall leans against Etho as Doc flies off, a stray tear falling from his eye. Etho gently rubs his shoulder, humming to Iskall as the man struggles to contain his fear. Etho doesn’t - Etho won’t let Iskall relapse, he promised the other hermits that this would be good, healthy for Iskall. He won’t let Iskall lose himself.

Rendog burnt to death fighting Docm77 

---

They footsteps echo down the hallway, bare feet hitting the stone floors. It’s angering, this base in their domain - Night control the End and the Nether, surely they could have built a base in one of those. In any case, Night has an offer that he cannot refuse. Her long hair is in a braid, and she prides herself on knowing that she will confuse her father's sibling.

“Jungle, welcome.” Night says, their mask cracked. They look deranged, perfectly matching Jungle’s emotions. “I assume you are here to collect your players?”

“I will work for you until I get all of them back.” Jungle smiles, making sure that it’s just too wide. They scan the room, spying Beef and Doc. Two of their players. “I thought you only had one.”

“I had to lull the hermits into a false sense of security. I wanted to make them think that Experiment escaped.” Night nods to Doc, and Jungle turns his gaze to the man. 

It’s so, so painfully clear he’s scared. They can smell it on him. But he isn’t fighting Night’s control - or maybe he’s too weak to escape it. The fear only serves to break the two men further. Fear radiates off of the two men, though it’s clear that the stars that Night replaced them with are confused by their hosts’ fear. 

Perfect.

They can’t wait to bury these men in bedrock and vines.

---

“Dad?” Grian asks quietly, his eyes wide. Builder reads over the notification. Once. Twice, before he sighs. “What are we going to do?”

“I need to get something from the godly realm.” Builder says, standing slowly. Xisuma blinks, watching the god with distrust. “Something to counter Jungle.”

“Oh!” Grian lights up a small amount, and Cleo looks to the corner of the room, her mouth open as though she’s going to ask it something, “Are you getting Althea and Ella?”

“Who?” Joe asks, sitting on the table.

“My sisters.” Grian says without second thought.

“His daughters.” Rose points to Builder. “The goddess of Mushroom Islands and the goddess of roofed forests.”

Builder nods, before disappearing into the air. Xisuma wraps his arms around himself, his knees hitting his chest. Scar pats his back sympathetically, and Xisuma sighs.

“I can’t keep anyone out of here, can I?” Xisuma mumbles.

“You’re trying your hardest.” Scar says, smiling. “That’s all that matters.”

Rose summons some magic, using it to clear some of the dusk off of the higher shelves in the room. Cleo starts mumbling to herself, and everyone except Joe and Rose give her worried looks as she addresses her ramblings to Amari.

Three buzzes echo from the communicators, and Builder enters the room with two women. One of the wears a red cloak, a white dress and a brown leather corset, knives and potions hanging from it. The other women wears a simple red dress, her hair in a bob around her head, though she wears sturdy leather boots.

“You must be Xisuma!” The one in the red dress smiles, shaking his hand. “I love how you used my domain for the shopping district, It’s always nice to see people settle here!”

“Uhh, Althea you might want to introduce yourself-” The other, Ella, says, patting her back. “In any case, I want to beat up our sinling. Where the fuck are they?”

---

Amari watches over the group, as everyone settles in for the night. She refuses to allow herself to show to the mortals, and though Etho, Keralis and Cleo are kind and promise that the mortals would get used to her, she refuses to give them another reason to fear. She leaves the barracks, walking over to a small room that overlooks the shops. They glow against the night sky.

“Hello Madam Amari.” Joe Hills says, and Amari turns her head, surprised. “I assume you’re here, this is the nicest view in the building, though if you aren’t here I assume I look insane.”

Amari smiles, knowing that Mr Hills says this as he enters every room. Perhaps she’ll give him the sight, for being kind to her and her wards. Void only knows that kind eccentric people deserve a power that is from an unknown blessing, and prophecy is so very over used.

#the night au #Night Au #hermitcraft #fic

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

The TRUTH about Cubfan135! The Science!

Hello Internet, welcome to GAME THEORY.

Cubfan has always been a strange entity with Hermitcraft. Is he human? Vex? A meme? Cryptid? A figment of Goodtimeswithscar's imagination? The ghost of christmas capitalism? I'm here to prove to you that Mr Cubfan 'Cub' 135 is actually none of those. (Or maybe some of those.) As I have done an immense amount of research and drank so much tea to bring you the theory to end all theories:

Is Cubfan135 a villager?

Let's look at the facts.

I spent 5 whole minutes googling Cubfan's skin. He has 2 pixels across, 1 pixel high eyes. Now, due to the limitedness of minecraft skin's, we're going to use the proportions of other hermits to help us.

There are a few types of eyes found on hermits skins.

1x1 - Mumbo

2x1 - Cubfan, Etho, Hypno, Iskall, Joe Hills, Rendog, Tango, TFC, VintageBeef, XBCrafted, Xisuma, Zedaph, ZombieCleo

1x2 - Grian

2x2 - Bdouble0100, FalseSymmetry, Scar, iJevin, Impulse, StressMonster

3x3 - Docm77, Keralis

So based on this data, we found that 1/26 hermits have beedy eyes that scare me, 1/2 hermits have short but slim eyes (almond?) 1/26 have no soul, 3/13 have round eyes and 1/13 have eyes so big that you can only look into their eyes and nothing but their eyes.

So from this, we can infer that hermits with 2x1 eyes are the most dominant eye shape.

I went back on google and lo and behold, our research proves right:

But what does this have to do with Cubfan? Well, you see, Cubphan is actually apart of that 2x1 club. Wanna know who else is? The minecraft villagers.

Of course, as we've established, this is a dominant trait in the hermitcraft continuity so I wouldn't be surprised if you aren't convinced.

But what about their baldness? We know from ingame breeding mechanics that villagers are born bald meaning they most likely can't grow hair on their head to begin with. But do we have evidence that Kubfan134 was bald as a child? Well, no.

But! We do have evidence of what Cub looked like in his 'youth!' As far as I'm aware, this skin goes unused. (Don't quote me on that, if it does get used, can someone please tell me where? I really want to know the story behind this one.) Also, we have no evidence Cub didn't have hair as a child so I win.

Wanna know who else has a hairless head? The villagers! (And also potentially Xisuma. Could you imagine?)

Still not convinced? Look above their eyes. What do you see? Eyebrows. There's only 7 hermits with eyebrows (some could be argued that it's actually eyeliner, bringing that down to 4 hermits if you really wanted to) meaning either EVERYONE COLLECTIVELY SHAVED THEIR EYEBROWS OFF or it's more likely a recessive trait. And Ckubfan has that recessive trait. But who else has eyebrows? The VILLAGERS! Well actually, it's a unibrow, but because Cub's are bushy I'm just going to say that maybe villagers grow eyebrows really fast and just keep them well groomed.

But here's one more connection. What was Ckubthan135 infamous for in season 6? No, not golf or vex, his capitalism. Kub was so capitalist he and Scar made money even after closing down Concorp shops and saying "stop giving us money, we're retired." The villagers are also very capitalist, being the only other mob to have a currency and trading system.

"But Mat Pat!" I hear you plead, "if Cub was a villager, where is his nose?!" And to that I say, Villagers are humanoid, right? And Cub has many traits villagers don't. For example, a lack of visible nose, placing and destroying blocks, being able to speak, being well liked by most hermits.

So here's my theory: Cub is half villager and half human.

"But what about the Vex?!" Well my dear viewers, that's going to have to be saved for a part two. I'm sorry, I really didn't want to split this into two parts, but this script is long enough as is.

Speaking of long scripts, let's make this script even longer! So Cub is half villager and half human. But let me tell you, I think one of the hermits may be responsible for his creation. Can you guess who? I'll give you a second.

...

Had a second? Okay, drum roll please! (Table smacking noises.) Mumbo! Mumbo is Cub's dad!

"But Mat Pat! Cub is older than Mumbo!" Or is he? Time travel is an established thing in the Hermitcraft universe, so is rapid ageing/de-ageing. Just look at Scar! If he can go from 30 to 60 between seasons, Mumbo probably can too! (In reverse.)

Let's look at the genetics.

Cub had black hair? Mumbo has black hair.

Mumbo is brilliant at redstone. Perhaps he passed that on?

Their eyes aren't similar at all. Cub's are 2x1 whereas Mumbo's are a single pixel. But villagers have 2x1 eyes. But they're green and Cub's are black. But aha! Mumbo's are black so we're okay!

Both have brilliant facial hair. Facial hair growth is actually reliant on the amount of testosterone you have and given that Cub and Mumbo's voices seem to sit around the same note of A or A#, I wouldn't be surprised if they had similar amounts of testosterone.

So, Cub is a half villager half human who's dad is Mumbo Jumbo himself.

But that's just a theory... A GAME THEORY!!! Thanks for watching!

#hermitcraft #hcraft #hermitblr #hermitcraftheadcanons #cubfan #cubfan135 #hermitcraft cub #mumbo #mumbojumbo #mumbo jumbo #TheScience! #long post #posted 22.04.20 #architech #concorp #convex