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windfighter · 2 years

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On the road

Satomi woke Kouji and Kouichi up. Kouji checked his phone for the time. 4:30. Early even for him. He yawned and sat up. Kouichi looked absolutely miserable at having to be up that early.

”Excited for the trip?” Kouji asked, just to say something.

Kouichi covered his face with a hand and yawned before nodding. Kouji stood up. He felt a little cold, but it was probably just the night air. He changed into sweatpants and a sweatshirt, wanting to have comfortable clothes for the 6 hour long car ride. Kouichi did the same and they headed down for breakfast.

Kouji couldn’t sit still, but not in a positive way. This was the first time he and Kouichi went on a trip together, not including the digiworld, and he was worried. For what, he wasn’t entierly sure. Would Kouichi get tired of him after two days? What if they got into a fight? What would they even fight about? Kouji made a list in his head and tried to figure out how to solve those arguments before they happened.

Having people around you that you could just beat up and never talk to again was a lot easier than having a brother.

Satomi and Kousei had prepared a real breakfast – soup, fish, rice and tamagoyaki instead of just coffee and sandwiches – so they wouldn’t feel hungry for a while. It didn’t settle well in Kouji’s stomach. He could never eat directly when he woke up, and the anxiety wasn’t helping. He still tried to eat a little of everything.

Kouichi was a lot better at eating when he woke up. Kouji watched in fascination as Kouichi finished the second serving.

”Helps me stay awake”, Kouichi answered a question Kouji hadn’t even asked.

Kouji felt nauseous just watching it. He pushed his own plate away and leaned against the table. Satomi looked at him.

”I’ll pack some for you to eat when you get hungry”, she said and Kouji nodded.

He waited while the others finished their breakfast, and then he and Kouichi went upstairs again. They packed some last minute-things in silence. Kouji knew he should talk, but he still felt nauseous after breakfast and the closer they got to departure-time the more anxious his body got. He sat down on his bed and closed his eyes, forcing himself to breathe deeply.

”You okay?” Kouichi asked and sat down next to him.

Five answers tried to come out at once and it turned into a verbal keysmash. Kouichi looked at him and Kouji tried again.

”Body’s not used to eating this early”, he settled on. ”Other than that I’m fine. Just excited.”

”Hm.”

Kouichi absolutely did not believe him, Kouji could tell. He took another deep breath and grabbed his bag.

”Time to leave!” Kousei called from downstairs.

Kouichi stood up as well and they headed to the car together.

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One hour into the car ride and Kouji was still feeling nauseous. Kouichi had fallen asleep shortly after the left home and was sleeping really soundly for someone who had trouble falling asleep. It was good, Kouji assumed, because otherwise Kouichi would have noticed the way Kouji was shivering and that he was way less irritating than usually when they took the car somewhere.

Kouji pressed a hand against his mouth as they took a corner and his stomach threatened to empty itself. He swallowed and it didn’t help.

”Dad, can we pull over?” he asked.

He just needed some fresh air.

”We’ll reach a rest stop in another hour”, Kousei answered. ”There’s not really a good place to stop here.”

Another half hour and the nausea was overwhelming. Kouji’s stomach had started cramping and saliva constantly gathered in his mouth. He could tell he’d throw up any second.

”Dad”, his voice trembled. ”I need you to pull over.”

Kousei opened his mouth to protest and glanced into the rear-view mirror. Kouji wasn’t sure what he saw but about ten seconds later the car pulled to a stop.

Kouji unbuckled and opened the door at the same time, stumbling to the side of the road. He leaned over, half-digested food and stomach acid forced itself up his esophagus and out his mouth. It burned and Kouji’s eyes teared up.

Satomi appeared at his side, put a hand on his back and rubbed circles on it as he tried to gather himself again. Kouji took a few shaky breaths and threw up again.

”Better now”, he said when his body was done.

Kouichi got out of the car as well, handed Kouji a bottle of water and Kouji rinsed his mouth to get the taste out. He still shivered and Satomi put a hand to his forehead.

”Why didn’t you tell us you were feeling sick?”

”I’m not sick”, Kouji answered. ”I just had breakfast too early.”

He couldn’t be sick, not on the first vacation together with Kouichi.

”Do we need to turn around?” Kousei asked from the car.

Ice wrapped around Kouji’s core. The vacation hadn’t even started and he was already destroying it for everyone. He shook his head.

”I’m fine. Just remind me to never eat breakfast immediately again.”

”Do you want to sit in the front?” Satomi offered.

”I’m not car sick”, Kouji said. ”I’ve never had trouble with the car before. I’m fine in the back.”

”You do look kind of sick”, Kouichi said, the tone of his voice mixed with amusement and worry.

”I’m fine”, Kouji repeated and headed back to the car.

He waited for Kouichi to get seated before climing in himself. Satomi sat down in the front and Kousei started the car. Kouji curled up and leaned against the window. Maybe if he fell asleep the nausea would go away.

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The nausea did not go away. When they stopped at the rest stop Kouji had to throw up again. They had toilets there, so at least he could do it without his whole family seeing him being miserable. He sat down on the toilet and sniffled when it was over. They still had at least four more hours on the road, breaks included. Kouji wasn’t sure he could handle that. Should he ask if they could go home? He put his head in his hands and took a shaky breath. He couldn’t. That was two hours and even that felt too much.

Maybe he could just stay at the rest stop for the rest of his life.

There was a knock on the door. Three swift hits followed by a harder tap. Kouichi.

”Are you done in there soon?” he asked and Kouji groaned.

”Yeah, give me two seconds.”

”Satomi wants to know if you’re hungry.”

Just the thought of food made the nausea worse again. He shivered and rubbed his arms in an attempt to get warmer.

”Not really”, he said.

He sounded way too miserable even to his own ears. Hopefully Kouichi wouldn’t pick up on it.

”I found a ginger-drink if you’re still nauseous”, Kouichi continues.

Kouji got up from the seat and opened the door.

”I’m fine”, he said but he really didn’t know who he was trying to convince.

”You’re not”, Kouichi said and there was almost laughter in his voice. ”Ginger might help.”

Kouichi offered him the drink and Kouji let out a sigh before accepting it. He drank half and just felt more nauseous.

”Don’t think it’s helping”, he said.

He should not have said that. Kouichi snorted and Kouji realized he had just admitted to not being fine. He shoved Kouichi to the side and walked back to the car.

”Ready to get going?” Kousei asked.

Kouji sat down in the backseat and put the drink to the side. He wasn’t, but he would not be admitting that unless he absolutely had to.

”Yeah, we can go whenever”, he answered

He put the seatbelt on, closed the door and leaned against it. He’d try to fall asleep before the car started, maybe that would save him.

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A bump in the road woke him up and the nausea was bad. Kouji reached for the door with a groan.

”Dad”, Kouichi said next to him and the car pulled to a stop just as Kouji got the door opened.

He didn’t even attempt to get out, just leaned to the side and threw up. Kouichi moved closer and rubbed his back.

”Sorry”, Kouji mumbled.

”Don’t worry about it”, Kouichi answered. ”Everyone gets sick sometimes.”

Kouji glanced at all the sicktempber-stories the author had written.

”Tell me about it”, he said and rolled his eyes.

Kouichi snorted and kept rubbing his back. Kouji took a shaky breath and leaned back into the car. A blanket had been wrapped around him and fallen down while he was throwing up. He pulled it up to his shoulders as Kouichi leaned over him and closed the door.

”Ready to continue?” Kousei asked. ”It’s closer there than back home by now.”

”As ready as I’ll be”, Kouji answered.

At least he had managed to sleep past some of the travel. He shivered under the blanket and Kouichi buckled up again. The drive continued and Kouji closed his eyes.

”We could play car games, if you think that’ll help”, Kouichi suggested. ”Might take your mind of it, I mean.”

”Hm”, Kouji though about it. ”Maybe the association game?”

”I was thinking something that needed a bit more brain power, but sure, that works. Uh… I’ll start with school.”

School had teachers and homework and… Kouji’s brain felt slow.

”Takuya”, he said and rested his head against the window again. It was cool.

”Fire”, Kouichi answered.

A fire would be nice, if Kouji was honest. He shivered under the blanket.

”Camping”, he mumbled.

”How do you get from Takuya to fire?” Kousei asked in the front seat.

”He was fire”, Kouji mumbled and Kouichi poked his side.

”Have you ever met him? He’s so stupidly hotheaded”, he told Kousei. ”Like there’s always a fire under his butt.”

Kouji took a shaky breath and put a hand over his mouth. His stomach felt like it was about to empty itself again.

”Not helping?” Kouichi asked.

”Not helping”, Kouji confirmed. ”I’m gonna… try to sleep again.”

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It took another 5 emergency and one planned stops before they reached their destination. Kouji grabbed his bag, and then Kousei grabbed it from him. Kouji knew he should protest, he would have if he was feeling fine, but instead he wrapped his arms around himself.

”Cute cabin”, Kouichi commented.

”Two bedrooms, one for you two”, Kousei answered. ”A kitchen, if we don’t want to go to the town for food.”

Kouji’s stomach twisted at the thought of food and he put his fist against his mouth to battle the nausea.

”Think I’ll skip dinner”, he said.

His voice was rough and talking hurt a bit. Satomi put a hand against his back and pushed him towards the door.

”Let’s get you to bed.”

Bed sounded nice. Kouji waited as she unlocked the door and then headed straight for the smaller of the two bedrooms. He hesitated. It had a bunk bed and he was supposed to sleep in the top one, they had decided on it the previous day. He had been excited for it, but having to climb down every time he needed to throw up sounded like a disaster waiting to happen. Kouichi arrived as well.

”Take the lower bed”, he said.

Maybe twins could read each other’s minds. Kouji glanced at him.

”You sure?”

”I’d rather sleep in the top bunk than risk you vomiting on me.”

That was reasonable. Kouji laid down in the bed and curled up under the cover. Kousei put Kouji’s bag by the footend of the bed and Kouji looked at him.

”You can go do stuff”, he said. ”I can handle sleeping on my own.”

”It’s been a long ride”, Kousei answered. ”We’ll relax in here today and get out on the slopes tomorrow.”

Kouji raised an eyebrow, then decided he didn’t have the energy or voice to argue. Kousei patted Kouji’s shoulder.

”Let us know if you need anything.”

He left. Kouichi hovered and Kouji closed his eyes. He wanted to tell Kouichi to go hang out with Kousei and Satomi, wanted to tell him sorry, wanted to tell him they could still do fun things.

”Getting sick was not on my emergency list”, he muttered and yawned.

”...you have an emergency list?”

Being sick was the worst, Kouji decided, since his brain had decided to betray him. He pulled the cover over his head. How was he supposed to explain all the scenarios he’d gone through before they left home?

”...was afraid you’d get sick of me”, he just answered.

”Instead you got sick”, Kouichi said and laughed.

Kouji curled up under the cover and Kouichi sat down on the bed.

”I won’t get tired of you, okay? I just found you after 10 years of loneliness.”

”I’m not… used to people staying around.”

Kouichi put a hand on Kouji’s shoulder.

”You’re not getting rid of me that easily though. I promise.”

”Hm”, Kouji said. He wasn’t sure he could believe that. ”I’m gonna sleep, okay?”

”Okay”, Kouichi answered. ”I’ll put a trashcan by the bed for you.”

Kouichi stood up again. Kouji pulled the cover down and watched Kouichi grab the trashcan and put it by the bed. He hoped he wouldn’t need to use it. He rubbed his eyes and yawned.

”Want me to stay in here?” Kouichi asked.

”I’m fine, go hang out with mom and dad.”

”Alright. Just call if you need me.”

Kouji nodded and closed his eyes. He heard the door close and took a shaky breath. Hopefully he’d feel better in the morning.

#my writing #sicktember 2022 #digimon frontier #kouji minamoto #kouichi kimura #sick kouji #prompt: 'I need you to pull over'#this took two days!#aslkgf #sometimes words don't come easy to me #feeling nauseous myself didn't /help/#anyway I'm somewhat happy with it?#well obviously #all my stories are amazing #my favorite part was Kouji breaking the fourth wall #no actually kouichi jokingly saying 'instead you got sick'#I laughed SO HARD when I wrote that #I hope the rest of you appreciate Kouichi's joke as well #and don't worry #kouji'll feel better in the morning and then Kouichi will find out that Kouji absolutely cannot skii to save his life #apparently it only takes maybe 4 hours to go from Tokyo to the skii places #I didn't know when I started the story so that's why they take 6 hours to get there #let's say they add an extra two hours to the travel time because they're travelling with kids and need to take more breaks #yeah that sounds good #I'll go with that

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inkskinned · 8 months

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hey btw if you're in the USA at 2:20 p.m. ET on Wednesday, Oct. 4, they're testing the emergency broadcast system. your phone is probably going to make a really loud noise, even if it's on silent. there's a backup date on the 11th if they need to postpone it.

if you're not in a safe situation and have an extra phone, you should turn that phone completely off beforehand.

additionally, if you're like me, and are easily startled; i recommend treating it like a party. have a countdown or something. be surrounded by your loved ones. take the actions you personally need to take to make yourself safe.

i have already seen mockery towards any person who feels nervous about this. for the record, it completely, completely valid to have "emergency broadcast sounds" be an anxiety trigger. do not let other people make fun of you for that. emergency sounds are legitimately engineered to make us take action; those of us with high levels of anxiety and/or neurodivergence are already pre-disposed to have a Bad Time. sometimes it is best to acknowledge that the situation will be triggering for some, and to prepare for that; rather than just saying "well that's stupid, it's just a test."

"loud scary sound time" isn't like, my favorite thing, but we can at least try to prevent some additional anxiety by preparing for it. maybe get yourself a cake? noise cancelling headphones? the new hozier album? whatever helps. love u, hope you're okay. we are gonna ride it out together.

#watching ppl go from being like ''support neurodivergent ppl~~!"#to being like ''if this is going to give u a panic attack ur fuckken stupid''#like..... gets me #yeah man. i know im going to be triggered by it . in the old fashioned term. it is GOING to give me a panic attack. it's pretty much certai #and i shouldn't have to tell u about what i have survived for you to be okay with that.#you can just trust that i ALSO don't want me to react to it. i'm not gonna be having a FUN time.#dismissing that bc you think it's stupid.... like is the whole problem.#these sounds are workshopped by entire teams of people to get you to pay attention and move quickly.#they arent meant to be fun and exciting.#OBVIOUSLY it's gonna set ppl off.#but yeah there's something so fuckken demeaning about ppl being like. well that trigger isn't valid bc u haven't undergone X #dude i have ptsd bc i was abused as a child. like plain and simple. the fact im 30 and afraid of the dark tells you how bad it was.#i shouldn't have to ask u for permission to be mentally ill.#the reason it's a fucking disorder and not a fucking choice is that I DO NOT CONTROL IT.#like how is it any different from when ppl are like ''oh public speaking isn't that scary'' like FOR YOU #for YOU this isn't scary. now if i could fucking eat my own amygdala...

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