#why is it calming if it can kill me

[act-more-like-a-dog-sirius]

HP Rants: Things Fandom Gets WRONG

The Dark Mark (tattoo)

where oh where is the reading comprehension??? did y’all really not read any of GoF??? not only does the minister of fucking magic not know about the Dark Mark tattoos, as snape has to explain and show it to him (which just ????? astounding incompetence from the ministry of goddamn magic and the wizarding world at large) but sirius literally says in response to the kiddos telling him that Karkaroff showed snape something on his arm, “'He showed Snape something on his arm?' said Sirius, looking frankly bewildered...'Well, I’ve no idea what that’s about." despite the fact that he KNOWS for a fact karkaroff was a death eater. (and his own goddamn brother was a death eater. And his family was super pro-voldemort).

The whole fucking point is that no one knew.

Otherwise it would have been obvious who was and who wasn’t death eaters, or at least, inner-circle death eaters. Sirius would not have gone to Azkaban. The Malfoys and literally every other free death eater would have.. but this didn’t happen because the wizarding world is complete shit at handling things and disseminating EXTREMELY IMPORTANT information.. that’s the whole fucking point.

#every time i see a fic say that regulus “took the mark” #or that sirius' parents wanted to make him “get the mark” #i want to scream in rage #and i immediately close the fic no questions asked #and then have to take at least 5 minutes of deep breaths to calm myself down and remind myself people are allowed to be wrong #i can be mature and let them be wrong #i am a mature adult and can let them be wrong #i don't need to start a fight because i am a mature adult and i can just let them be wrong it won't kill me #but seriously #why the FUCK is everyone so fucking wrong #ALL THE FUCKING TIME #WHERE or where is the fucking reading comprehension???? #salty hp rant #hp rant #hp meta #harry potter #sirius black #dark mark #salty hp takes #marauders #harry potter meta #i hate being the only correct person in this fandom #lmfao #god please help there is no reading comprehension in this fandom #it is so diseased and sick #marauders fandom #literally the fucking worst

[swamp-chicken]

sub top impulse and dom bottom bdubs. easy peasy

you are entirely correct and this is the sane answer. but why does the Dominant and Support accusation feel so much like etho grinding his teeth imagining the virginal innocent bdubs being ravished by impulse every night

#why is etho approaching bdubs like impulse is some rotten abusive boyfriend that bdubs fell head over heels with and now theyre engaged #and bdubs is knocked up #and etho feels his life spinning further and further out of control #bdubs slipping further and further away #and all he can do is try to stay calm. how's impulse treating you? you can tell me. #and maybe offer to kill bdubs' boyfriend? i'm good at these things. if you've got any problems with him...

[kindheartedgummybears]

you wanna know what??

I am

TIRED

of overmasculinized werewolves!!!!

I WANNA SEE A

WEREWOLF

WALKING AROUND IN A CVNTY LITTLE OUTFIT!!! WALKING THE STREETS!!!! DISEMBOWELING CREATURES!!!!

I WANNA SEE WEREWOLVES COVERED IN BLOOD AND GORE WHILE WEARING A SHORT SKIRT AND CROPTOP WITH HELLO KITTY ON IT!!!!

I WANNA SEE A WEREWOLF WALKING AROUND IN COTTAGE AND FAIRY AND PRINCESS CORE OUTFITS!!!!!! WITH A DEAD MANGLED RABBIT IN ITS MOUTH!!!!

AND MAKE THE WEREWOLF

D I S G U S T I N G ! ! !

#i am TIRED of seeing all these manly man werewolves that are all copy and paste white boys #I am TIRED of seeing all these woman werewolves being butch and masculine(also mostly white) or submissive!!! #I WANNA SEE SOME PLUS-SIZE WEREWOLVES I WANNA SEE SOME BLACK ASIAN LATINO MIDDLE EASTERN NON WHITE WEREWOLVES!!!!! THAT ARNT F3TIZIED!!!!! #I WANNA SEE A G I R L WEREWOLF THATS INTO “G I R L Y” THINGS!!!!! LET THE WEREWOLF BE A SLVT!!!!! #LET THE WEREWOLF BE IN THE TRADITIONAL CLOTHING OF ITS CULTURE!!!! #AND RIP AND TEAR AND MAUL AND CRY IN THE MORNING AFTER DOING ALL OF IT!!!! RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #no but fr can we werewolf fans like. actually sit down and reflect on the inherent misogyny of werewolves??? ESPECIALLY IN MEDIA #like. almost EVERY. SINGLE. WEREWOLF. in movies and shows and stuff are always a buff white man with anger and trust issues #and on the rare occasion that there *is* a woman werewolf shes always either over masculine or “weaker” than the “stronger alpha male” were #olf and only seen as a mate. AND shes always “calmer” and “maternal” and “calms the alpha male down🥺🥺”.AND she never has an actually good #werewolf form its always either wolf tail and ears or full wolf. or if it *is* actually a decent werewolf her transformation is offscreen. #like whyyyyyyyyyyyyy are people so scared to make women go ape shit?????? werewolves are NOT pretty creatures!!!! STOP MAKING THEM PRETTY!! #(lmao jk we know why they're so scared hashtag male gaze) #like yes. werewolves ARE pretty but not in the “dog show 30k$ poodle” kind of way i see some people making them(not that that's bad tho) #AND ALSO LIKE. ARE WE JUST GOING TO PRETEND WEREWOLVES LITERALLY WEREN'T MADE FOR WOMEN AND MINORITIES??? #like. once a month someone turns into a raging bloodthirsty unstoppable beast driven by the moon and instincts with an insatiable hunger an #need to hide away from people due to them wanting to kill you or fearing you simply because you're a werewolf. they don't know you. they ju #t see you as a creature that might hurt them. constantly being hunted down to be killed simply for existing. #WHAT PART OF THAT SCREAMS: “ah yes. White man.” #IK theres going be people(men and pick mes) that see this post and think “this bitch is overreacting” and tbh idc.the girls who get it get #the girls who dont dont. #anyways shout out to Ginger Snaps trick or treat and every other piece of media or fan piece with disgusting non-f3tiszied woman/poc werewo #i love yall #*smooch smooch* #Werewolves #Werewolf #Lycanthrope #Lycanthropy #Werewolf AU #Yeah. Im tagging that too. I see yall.

[90stvqueen]

my cat just went on a feral play aggression kick and scratched the shit out of me. i put him in time out for ten minutes and now he's lying on my legs grooming himself. the duality of man

#this fucking cat. he doesn't do this very often but when he does he's genuinely scary #and nothing i do will calm him down #no soft voice. no yelping in pain like a kitten. no hissing. nothing #i have to scoop him up and hold him at an arms length and put him in my room and shut the door before he can attack me again #i mean he ATTACKS me there's no other word for it #it feels personal. and murderous #i've wondered before if this cat wants to kill me. but now he's lying on my legs perfectly content to co-opt my body heat #i love him so much but right now i' #right now i'm so mad at him and just at my wits end. i thought we were done with this #and we've been playing with him! his litter box is clean and there's food in his bowl! #so what the fuck dr seuss #why #dr seuss the cat

[gazelessmenagerie]

( is it too much to lightly throw the idea that each time I have to throw earth #whatever once broly goes ballistic, that's essentially a timeline where that DOES happen instead of the 'soft reboot' that occurs bc I can't necessarily have earth be destroyed cause RP land etiquette for the other folks I write with. sdfjg )

#|| Tag: OOC #(... it just hit me bc I don't necessarily WANT to pretend him being an uncontrolled force of anger is meaningless ) #( when he's pushed to the brink of losing that control but I dont want to step on peoples toes or seem like im godmodding it ) #( like i do what I can to make sure he doesn't reach that point but ah.. ;w; it cant be helped in some cases ) #( so I'm just kinda pushing it to my own narrative that each time a timeline gets fucked up that bad. it just kinda “ends” there ) #( and the focus shifts towards either another Timeline where Broly DIDN"T do that thing and kill everyone/everything. ) #( so in short.. its like having a trial and error where there's at least one timeline of things going better ) #( but its not pretty and broly has a 90-99% rate of destroying shit bc he's an awful person. ) #( its why it kinda helps if he has people who can effectively calm him down but even they can't help him when hes lost his marbles complete

[miallurk]

In these days i realized i like art and writing and creating and shopping and taking walks and talking to people and cleaning and helping and studying and doing things but i'm just. too stressed, tired and burned out to do them. How great!

#i am losing my sanity day by day #drowning myself in the nearby lake seems better and better every day #why am i even writing this i have literally no mutuals or even people who'd care about #don't mind me crying myself to sleep haha #ooooh look at this pathetic baby. sitting in their little bed crying stupid tears. i should at least get tissues now while my crying isn't #fuck history fuck school and fuck me i quess #am i gonna start treating this as an actual blog and make a sideblog for reblogs? who knows! certainly not me; stay tuned for the story! #i'm gonna go and just let it all out into a pillow #vent ig #my mom is blasting holiday music in the other room lol #nice to have a whatever the fuck im having while “jingle bells” plays #at least i'm not hearing mariah carey ig #anyway i've probably hadn't been taking care of myself lately it has been worse despite me promoting it to everyone who needs #when i vented last time and it wasn't taken seriously so woop #anyway imma go try to calm myself and back to my notes i go #please gods what did i do to deserve thi s shit. fuck you #i hate it here i really do. i hate when these people talk to me i hate them. i at least can be sorta accquaitances with one but they just. #all stare and laugh? i actually can't. like i'm some fucking clown and laughing stock. just kill me at this point. i have been enduring this #for YEARS and suddenly i'm being a little bitch about it?? what the fuck. why am i so mushy all of a sudden. being shown an ounce of respect #and care made me expect it more? fuck #i'm just setting myself up for failure. i am just a giant loser and failure of a person. #everything seems so fucking hard. and pointless. i am tearing my rotten little heart apart with this. i am once again grieving things #long ago and things i never had. my everything has to be pleasing to an outsider #my value is my suffering. am i breaking enough? is this beautiful to look at #at my self destruction? i hate myself. i treat others so cruelly. i am a horrible fucking person. #my problems are not their burden - i forced it on them. wept like a baby because she left me. and what happened in the end? my paranoia got #to me. i left them. i fucking. i fid the thing i was afraid of being done to me. #this is showing so many issues. #so many things wrong with me. i shouldn't even be alive by this point - i wasn't supposed to survive past 12 #i am being forced to do this every day. someone please just end my fu king suffering

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#listen. sometimes. when i get emails pertaining to a specific project i worked on that nearly broke my brain. i just stop what im doing #and start playing Losing My Religion by REM. and i wish the person emailing me could see me face down at a table listening to thay song #mostly its fine. its just when someones trying to manage the data files so i kno im gonna have to go back thru and update my code #for a bunch of tiny stuff and its like: does this sound ok? and i just dont care so much that i want to start screaming #and then at the end of the day i hike up a fucking mountain going over what im gonna tell a therapist when my insurance switches #and im gonna say it in a way thats v calm and agreeable but i want to scream and tear my hair out. or maybe i wont b agreeable. i wasnt #last time i was in a therapist office but that guy deserved it and i wasn't being that bad #ugh. im just mad bc working on my stuff makes me so miserable that when i stop its like wow im no longer in agony. cool #coool. fun times. becoming increasingly apprehensive abt how im gonna try to b more healthy abt working while taking on triple #the responsibility with a phd project and being a student and being a TA. i mean. ill try but its gonna b fucking interesting #ugh. had to bust out the burnout playlist. which like. when u try to look at other ppls burnout playlists they all suck #theyre all like former gifted kid burnout Playlists and im like fuckkk offfff. why do u not have the incredibly specific vibes that im #looking for? i just demand the perfect burnout playlist and somehow nobody puts No Surprises on there #like what??? y not? its a song abt being so totally saturated that youve had enough. a heart thats full up like a landfill. a job that #slowly kills u. bruises that wont heal. how is it not THE burnout song? but whatever. i listen to too much radi0head. #ugh. but now my burnout playlist is becoming too much like my My Brain Doesnt Feel Too Good playlist #listen. i just need to curate playlist so that they can express the feelings for me #unrelated

[unnamed-atlas]

Why did every ad on tumblr become very loud video ads that autoplay as you scroll overnight

#crying. killing. maiming. ect. #hitting them with hammers and so on #literally wtf though why in the world would you make that decision #it's all text to speech tiktok voice and shitty mobil game noises. except for the one ad that involves loud crying babies 💀 #I can not do this. the calm silence of a tumblr scroll should not be interrupted so abruptly and without warning every few minutes #actually scared me so bad the first few times

[anotherpapercut]

I'm seriously having to resist so hard the urge to block everyone on this website over that math color post. if you think math is red I'm sorry but you're wrong and you're going to math hell also. forever.

#i have a degree in math #if you have ever in your life said 'why do i need to learn this? ill never use this in real life!' youre not even allowed to talk about her #(math) #THATS MY WIFE AND SHES BLUE AND I AM WILLING TO FIGHT KILL AND DIE ON THIS HILL #you people disgust me #man i want to say slash jay but to be totally honest part of me is like..... maybe its a slash srs................. #literally the idea that math is red has always bothered me so much bc i feel like its just bc it makes people mad #but really math flows and swirls and connects like a system of rivers. shes blue like the water and the sky. like the space between things #blue like calm and cool but sometimes harsh and dark. its the most familiar blue of a loved ones eyes #but its also a deep blue thunder clouds obscuring the sky‚ steeped in mystery #blue as in primary. a foundational building block. blue makes purple and green. math makes physics and chemistry and statistics and and and #just trust me on this one #actually fuck this im blocking some of you #ugh also no different maths arent different colors. math is one thing. all of the different maths are split somewhat artificially #they literally all build upon each other and work together as one massive apparatus #its the exact same things. you can do calculus with algebra. you use algebra in trigonometry. calc is algebra and trig. which is geometry #she is one person with many facets and sides not many separate people

[autistic-katara]

i need to read some fanfiction before i actually kill myself

#cant even get into why bcz holy fuck #this is way more complicated than it needs to be and no one’s told me anything except the person whos supposedly in the wrong #god i hate mentally ill 13 year olds theyre the worst ppl to be around #and i’m saying that as someone who was one a couple years ago #no one’s telling me anything but whatever the fucks going on here’s making you assholes mentally worse on all sides #and jesus fuck none of u r communicating with eachother either and all i’m hearing is one side of the story but apparently there’s more tha #i’m not being told for some reason #and i really wish i could stay out of this but i can’t bcz one of the ppl involved is my sibling the other is either the problem or being #gaged up on depending on who u ask and the other others trying to kill themself over this and i had to be the dick who called their mum at #10pm and just jesus christ guys what r ur fucking problems every one of u get therapy bcz u seriously need it #ok i guess i did get into it nvm #cw suicide #vent #(?) #what was this post about again? #oh yeah gonna go read fanfic to try nd calm myself down after my go-to unhealthy coping mechanism didn’t work #then maybe i can FINALLY finish writing #ryan shut the fuck up

[rosykims]

THE LADY INQUISITOR

Roughly translated, Asha Fen’an - the latest of Lavellan’s many epithets- means ‘woman of the wolf’s heart’. The name appears to be a direct contemporary to the adversarial Fen’harel of Dalish mythology - the wolf trickster. Some say Lavellan herself has lended credence to recent reports that this trickster has resurfaced, and has in fact declared him the newest enemy of her Inquisition. While the threat remains heavily disputed by those outside her innermost circle, those of the Dalish still sympathetic to her cause use the title as a hopeful one – that it shall be one of their own who will finally slay the wolf and cut out its traitorous heart. Others, less charitably, use the name Asha Fen’an in mockery – no doubt referencing the wild claims that the Lady Inquisitor was at one point the lover of this very same Fen’Harel. This remains unfounded speculation, but its mere existence has inadvertently cast Lavellan’s loyalties to the Dalish into question. [template]

[Except from ‘Faces of the Dragon: Figures of Fame and Notoriety Throughout the Dragon Age’ by Brother Genitivi]

#dai #oc: ashara #the diff between charisma and sociability is so important here. bc when i say shes charismatic i mean shes good at intimidating people <3 #actually having a conversation and coming away from it looking good ? not so much #shes a good person really. and she tries SO so hard to protect her people. thats why shes so intense and harsh on ppl #bc failure gets people hurt or killed and she wants to protect everyone she can even if they hate her in the process #anyways shes my baby my fucked up miserable baby #if u havent heard me talk about her lore before just know she is firmly on the redeeming solas train. she just. doesnt know it yet lol #i think she's allowed to be homicidally angry for a few years and shake her fist at him from the rooftops. then she'll calm down

[i-am-a-fucking-nerd]

have a horrible headache and usually headaches are a combo of things (esp not eating/sleeping enough) which could be the reason i have one today but. also i smoked thu which was 2 days ago and usually i get a headache 2 days after smoking. and im just. i already wrote a diary entry talking abt it and how i feel guilty and bad for like a million different reasons but now i'm also just incredibly frustrated w myself bc why do i do this!!!!!!!!!!!! i can go weeks and months w/o smoking i don't NEED to do this!!!!!

#smoking #tw smoking #havilah's thoughts #addiction #tw addiction #nicotine #like i feel like i Know that i can just not smoke idk why i sometimes do it anyway bc it's literally only negatives #i've never had a.... i guess a 'strong' smoking habit? like usually it is weeks and v often it is months btwn cigs #i just sometimes get mad and wanna do Smth that will make me feel more bad but also kinda better????????? it doesn't make sense i know #this time i felt Particularly guilty bc just a little bit ago i was hanging out w my friend and he hugged me and told me he's glad i haven' #been smoking a lot lately and a buncha nice things i'll keep to myself but. i just. and then i got home and had a letter from my grandma #that was so so sweet and my grandma used to smoke and she quit before i was born and she used to tell me when i was a kid how horrible it i #and now i have a headache and i /hate/ headaches and it felt dirty and i felt slimy for hiding it from my roommate n for feeling like i was #lying to ppl that care abt me #i know i felt calm too. i know it somewhat feels nice. the sensation is diff from anything else and i like it. i know i sometimes need to d #smth that feels. like. drastic and like it's gonna kill me w/o killing me #but it just. i KNOW that it's not worth it later!!!!!!! i know that i feel horrible and the negatives outweigh the positives by a lot!!!!!! #but i never throw away the pack. it's like. idk. idk what to do to just Not do it. #anyway uh. lemme put additional warnings for what i ended up saying in the tags #suicide #suicidal ideation #depression #i guess idk. just covering my bases i guess so ppl don't see smth they don't wanna see

[grimbeak]

I see you’re experiencing some Kevin wtdb brainrot <33 I have nothing to offer you. Congrats or I’m sorry that happened ummm have you considered how he genuinely didn’t get what he was doing wrong in mudstone abyss and grew so disconnected from his community without even realising and have you considered that he is the voice of Desert Bluffs and so that realisation whenever it hits him funky is gonna HIT. And have you considered how him and Lauren have the dynamic of people who really did care at some point but grew to blame each other for their situation. Sorry I heart them. Also I think it’d be pretty funny if Donnie and Esteban became friends and Kevin and Cecil had to sit at park benches like moms who hate each other but are forced to get along decently for their kids sake? That’d be funny I think. Okay! Have fun I hope you don’t die from the thoughts!

I've thought b4 ab the sports games since desert bluffs does has a team there and how cecil usually goes to report, it would only make sense that kevin did the same- also if they held it in desert bluffs too he'd also be there to chaperone/get everyone there since he's been there the longest, so just. in any sports situation cecil's just trying SO hard to focus on the game while kevin's just having the Best Time grinning at him horrifyingly while giving him the double bird from across the field. esteban n donovan both doing lil kid soccer and their dads going to their games and just. them making Instant Friends and donovan dragging esteban over to meet his dads and kevin is trying so fucking hard not to laugh while cecil has to be restrained from finding a gun and shooting him

#you've given me an oppurtunity to rant and I thank you for tha #t #kevin n lauren r just....ughhhhi think ab them Often #in my fics/aus they either despise each other or they're legally married for tax reasons (neither of them pay taxes) #they're each other's work wives #charles tries to propose and kevins like omg yes hold on i needa divorce lauren first #they do their best to screw each other over but when one is genuinely hurt the other will stop at nothing to avenge them #smthn happening at the station that is Traumatic and b4 charles can even get there lauren's already holding him n helping him calm down #they're the only living people/people who are physically close to one another that knows what the other has gone through #they trust each other with their lives in the sense that #if there's a Big Scary Monster and one runs off seemingly out of cowardice #it's so they can find their Big Scary Weapon and kill that mfer #lauren bullied him as a kid but like. in a friend bully way and in the sense that no one else could bully him otherwise she'd kick their as #s #she almost shanked his dad once #also like. in the arc where everyone knows night vale is a real place now #and there r podcasts and there's one with janice where it's like is the mudstone abyss acsessable #1: girl why are you going there. like. that is in a whole other dimension do u have friends there? #and 2: i hc kevin as having prosthetics and having had back surgery both as a kid and strex attempting to fix him so its like #boi. how did you fuck up this badly. #you cant even make it down there now you just have to pretend you went down #hes a guest on the podcast at one point and janice asks him that and he just has his head in his hands #also: he janice dana tamika michelle and maureen all have girls nights together #its not bc he's gay cuz cecil isn't allowed #even they arent even sure why they allow him #he gives off girlboss energy and i love it #kevin wtnv #he either has a rivalry with michelle or maureen for no reason

[boethiahsboytoy]

Ivrasi got her first Dragon Soul everybody say congratulations Ivrasi!!

#i'm miraak and you're watching disney channel #stars plays skywim #Ivrasi Playthrough #ivrasi's like 19-20 btw shes definitely scared as fuck right now #she probably goes 2 irileth like MA'AM. WHAT THE FCUK JUST HAPPENED 2 ME. #like u kno how u gravitate towards ppl of ur ethnicity or like other queer people #irileth being like Okay. First Of All youre a warrior Calm Yourself #second of all i dont know what the fuck that weird glowy shit was. but u killed a dragon so i like you. #third of all go sit down you look ready to faint also your daedra is scaring everyone #she looks at vulon like 'hey why did you summon That out of any daedra' ivrasi's like MA'AM I DONT KNOW IT JUST KINDA. CAME HERE. #vulon is like trying to pry a bone off mirmulnir 2 bring home as a souvenir for vyrthaal #everyones like 'hey can u. not.' n vulons like 'FUCK OFF im getting my princes kid a PRESENT. ASSHOLE '

[perenlop]

ive seen get out the movie now... goddamn

#spoilers for the movie in the tags bc u should watch it urself #it was very different from the screenplay like more than i thought and i like the changes that were made #like fun fact rose and jeremy swap places in the climax and i love the movie version wayyyyy more #like originally it starts w rose trying to wheel him into the surgery and chris kills her first #and jeremy literally shows up to kill him 3 times. yeah i like that hes not that in the actual movie #bc in the screenplay i was like ''wtf why wont he go down why is he the main threat'' #and in the movie jeremy goes to get him and hes attacked. comes back and THEN gets blugeoned #which i like better bc we get the scene where rose is trying to find her next victim andshes like cold and calm throughout the climax #which is infinitely scarier and more thematically fitting bc SHE did this to him SHE sethim up SHE is the main antagonist #idk its very different but a REALLY good change that i really really like #the one rose related change i didnt care for is that they took out the bit where she manipulates him with a fake pregnancy #tho ig i get why it was taken out. ig ppl wouldve gone ''omg he killed a pregnant woman'' and that wouldve been annoying #idk if youve seen the movie i recommend reading the screenplay the changes are really fascinating #also the gore didnt scare me as much as i thought it would. i think i psyched myself out too much #+ its more descriptive in the screenplay. huh. maybe i CAN handle breaking bad. just if i read all the scripts beforehand #if anything like that is possible tho idk #echoed voice