#wow i need to go back to school

[1o1percentmilk]

feeling so empty tuesday

#wow i need to go back to school #or like #go to the library or smth #take a walk somewhere different #when things get too quiet around my brain i get the insane urge to [redacted] #life is too boring right now #kicks a pebble #it's too quiet #milk isn't this peace what you always wanted and strive for #well yes but #it doesn't feel right #wait holy shit did they add another bus to my city that runs at 8pm instead of ending at 7 pm #post cancelled moping cancelled we r going to the library to work on smut fic

[cxlandine]

extra courseload is too much for me but killing a god and reviving some ancient force of rage??

im a sick puppy and this excites me.

#bow wow bow wow #i was genuinely worried when ally got that nat 20 like 10 minutes in #like nooo pls scary god lady come back i don't wanna go to school #and then they all proceeded to roll absolute dogshit for the rest of the fight #this is my comfort zone #also ngl im glad kristen didn't just get to leave it at that deadbeat apology #she needs a big change ok #she's made that same apology several times now and not done shit #girlie needs to kill a god idk #dimension 20 #fantasy high #fantasy high junior year #fhjy #fantasy high junior year spoilers #fhjy spoilers #kristen applebees #d20 #d20 cassandra #fhjy mall madness

[problemcore]

been real cloudy here, without any rain

#halfway thru this i realized i was drawing myself and not gumi and i had to take a moment and re-gumi-fy the drawing #cant help being a gumi kinnie i guess U_U #dnoodles #vocaloid #i guess? idk i dont think a lot of people will reblog this. i actually kinda hope not. #hello dear followers #yea wow i have um. not been drawing at all lately. #not even simple doodles. i couldnt even pick up a pen. #so i sat down. turned on my favorite music. and drew what i wanted. #not what i wanted to see as the result #but what i wanted to let out of my system. #i dont really care if this looks good or bad. i dont care how messy the lines are. i dont care about the colors or the background #i just wanted to have a good time drawing again. and have a good time i did :) #i have a big drawing ahead of me i need to do. that i Want to do. #im scared of it not turning out good. especially since its for a friend. especially since im being paid for it. #but. im gonna let myself enjoy it. sink into the feeling and let the pen move on its own. indulge in the joy of creation. #i missed art. i missed posting. #sometimes i think about how i was able to crank out so many drawings in high school. #not without extreme determent to my grades of course. but still. i was drawing So Much. and i utterly loved it. #i still wish i could go back to that. perhaps i will. perhaps i wont. #but i want to let that wish go away. and. i guess. start a new chapter. #reinvent my relationship with art. #its going to be bad. its going to be messy. its going to hurt your eyes. and its going to be fun. #WOW okay that was an essay. thank you for reading. #im gonna go eat something and. actually get back to drawing. hehe

[ox1-lovesick]

hi

#life update nobody asked for lol #I missed you guys my pookie wookie dookies #I deleted all my social media and life is so great wow #still a lot of mental health problems but I'm finally learning to deal with my emotions and not hate life (wow) #is it bad for me to say I'm so glad I left blr #I will probably never come back here lol but I think (?) today is txt's debut anniversary and since I am the self proclaimed empress of moa #downgrading to a flip phone actually #I unstanned txt and all the kpop peoples too (SHOCKER) #I do feel really nostalgic and sad when I think about them but I think it was the thing I needed most #delulu is infact not the solulu #daydreaming about beomgyu being the new student at my school and being soobin's bestie was never the greatest idea hey #it's so freeing to not care about them and focus on what's infront of me #if you need a sign to start growing out of kpop and start worrying about your own life here it is babe 😭 don't let anybody give you shit #Not to say kpop is bad or anything I just think for me it was getting a bit out of hand #As much as we all make fun of the delulus it's so easy to fall down that spiral when these idols constantly tell you they love you #The parasocial relationship was REAL istg these people felt like my friends #Hueningkai does not give a FUCK about me and he is so real for that #Thinking about deleting this blog but I'm logging off after this so I very well may forget it exists again #But I just wanted to share what's been going on #And I miss you guys a lot #I may have outgrown kpop and tumblr but you all still have a special place in my heart #I miss the good old days 😭 when discord let's me back in I might visit wme #Not much has changed with me but mentally I feel like a whole new person #But I hope you all are doing GREAT #Living your best lives and doing things that make you happy #You owe it to yourself more than you owe these celebrities anything #xoxo savie 😝🤟🤟🔥🔥🔥

[loose-leafstudy]

22:59pm

monday, january 16

hi, i've started school again :) i've been working as a cna, and i enjoy patient care. but i also wanted to use my biology degree. so i'm working towards going for an accelerated nursing program

i'm taking pre-requisites that my bio degree didn’t cover (developmental psych, nutrition, and pathophysiology), and all of the classes are online. it’s been a transition to get back into school while also working. but it’s a new year and i'm trying to be optimistic haha

✿ wishing everyone the best in the new year (over two weeks later!) 

#student #back to school #post graduate #studyblr #lifeblr #trying to study #studying developmental psych #also omg sorry this post basically became a stream of consciousness diary entry #proceed ahead to the rambles #and this is the second time I've learned about freud erikson piaget #but i still struggle to take notes and stay focused haha #listening to glass animals new album #*new as in aug 22 lol #pretty cool noises going on #also in search of a new pfp but idk what i want #wow isn't that the story of my life lol #is this a lifeblr or studyblr post? #there needs to be something where it's like shouting into the void and hoping to connect with someone #from abby

[martyrbat]

im so considerate.... (<- guy not ranting about a thing it hates before its friend is done with the media)

#can officially say i finished the arkhamverse. didnt watch anything about that suicide squad one but i read all comics #a d watched the complete story & side mission gameplay for origins asylum city and midway through my refresher for knight #the biggest takeaway i have is wow these people are weird about convicts and addicts and love their toxic masculinity #but the gameplay and nostalgia impacts peoples opinions on it. maybe an enjoyable experience but for the story or universe itself #its a complete failure in every regard i can think of—only having glimpses moments of quality that makes the rest of it #be frustrating because the potential can be there. theres interesting premises occasionally but the execution and payoff doesn't make it #even worthwhile to get to those premises because of what you must wade through to reach them #<- thats me being my nicest and most spoiler freeabout it btw. #my other big takeaway is that tim is canonically older than jason and i think a grown ass man saying fuck that kid is really funny #[SPOILERS LOOK AWAY CJ] #<- tim currently works as a highschool science teacher while jason was shown to be adopted and made robin at 15 #where he was then promptly captured and kidnapped by joker. he escaped half? a year later during asylum and AK takes place 2 years afterward #i think. the entire timeline for this shitty universe is awful and confusing. dick was robin for like 2 years its ridiculous. #and i think primarily so they can go noooo see bruce is a hot late 30 year old instead because you become dust at any older!! #but. back to the age thing. hes about 17 maybe early 18 during AK but because tim is a private school teacher he needs a bachelor's degree #and most people get it at 22/23ish and then theres the actual teacher application and being hired (or not because hes a nepo baby) #so hes early mid twenties or so. compared to a (presumably dead) teenager who he called a loser more or less.

[mittenlady]

me when college is less in a day but also more in a day and also wow where did my free time go wow

#for the errrr 12 subscribers to CAYA. i am trying so hard #but i haven’t touched the doc in a while #this is so much dawg it’s my second week and im literally going insane when will i have free time #when i do im stressed and feel like i have none #me trying to join mock trial and seeing it is SUCH A BIG TIME COMMITMENT PLEASE. #wanting to do fencing knowing damn well i will be exhausted from 8-10 PM #me blocking out my classes to have free time but actually NO I DONT BECAUSE IM TOO STRESSED TO FOCUS #i need to look back at the doc it’s so overwhelming rn guys #to the handful of probably middle school and high schoolers. i will be ur big sister. Use ur time wisely bc u will never have it again dear #i am being melodramatic #but wow im so tired

[falled-over]

i need to speak to a man my age or i will kill myself

#back home i got a good mix of genders amongst who i have befriended. here its all girls. because i go to an all girls school #i did not want to. i am a pushover #the other day i saw a white dude my age at the supermarket and i seriously considered going up to him and asking if he spoke english #^he is the only other white person ive seen in my ward lmao #other day a kid of maybe 17 tried to get me to join his sailing team. i almost said i would #if not men i need to find some masculine dykes at leeeast #time to look up gay bars near me. because i guess i can do that now wow. #the gay bit not the bar bit ive been to my fair share of shitass pubs

[katierosefun]

i just need to brag to everyone that since the end of august, i've started this habit of just. waking up early to go to school but in that time, having the ability to read a little over breakfast and. 100/10 would recommend. excellent past-time. my brain feels much better.

#caroline talks #i forgot that i used to actually read at least a half hour a day back in high school #and how that used to calm me down and get me started for the day #and now that i'm doing that again. i feel calmer. #there's just something so delicious about slowly revisiting old habits that you know are actually good for you #like ngl there are still some bad habits i need to shake off #but like. reading books. going to the gym. forcing myself to go outside once a day. #planning out my day via my many many calendar apps. wow my brain feels more adjusted. #anyways i think for the first time in literally seven years i might finally meet my reading goal

[borvooven]

After procastinating for two years I finally listened to the gay pirate rock opera (aka The S.S. Krill) and... I think I'm not aromantic anymore. THIS is the kind of relationship I'd want and feel comfortable with, THIS is what I need NOW!!! Like I didn't know this was possible but this is the first time I've ever been cool with romantic media AND even managed to imagine myself in this kind of relationship. The ocean is the solution! I need to go on a ship and fall in love with one of my crewmates, preferably not someone who prefers to stay at land while I'm at sea, and get married by the captain and breathe the salty sea air with him and secretely lie on the beach under palm tress shirtless while the other men collect provisions and bring them on board and I need to live in the 18th century but it doesn't matter that the law is homophobic because our crewmates are the only people we ever get in contact with and they don't give a shit because they've literally seen sea monsters twice as big as the boat and mermaids and their mates being swallowed by whales so they can't be bothered if two guys kiss and

#guys i took an autism test with my therapist today and after i was done he was like wow okay uhm this looks positive #can you tell? #i feel the need to write a poem #help the ocean has captured my soul if i dont get to go back to the sea soon im gonna kill mywlef #ok not even joking i feel like i might start feeling worse because of having to go to school instead of being on a boat and kissing men #billy cobb #gay #i cant do this anymore i need a bf

[gideonisms]

burnout is supposed to end at some point, I have read this. However, how do you know when it has ended and you should gradually force yourself through more activities to get used to living a life again, and when doing that will send you Directly back to an even worse ring of hell. Is there like a guidebook or

#in some ways it sucks i've never had one massive breakdown just like small ones that didn't really justify lying in bed for a month #like when i say i'm doing that i'm also usually doing bare minimum reading eating exercise #in addition to lying in bed and scrolling for 5 billion hours #i'm still making plans and attempting to get better it's just at a glacial pace #it's not working i'm not feeling better i still feel like if i find a job or try to make a decision i'll probably break in a million pieces #then any time i try to work harder the rebound of that hits me even worse #every job i feel like i can deal with less and less masking. until one day i just won't be able to hold down one for more than 2 months #i kept trying every strategy i knew and it just wouldn't keep me from having to go to my car and scream sometimes #feels like walking over coals trying to apply for internships rn but schoolwork is the only task i like some of the time #need the internship to graduate if i don't graduate i'll just be stuck doing things i hate even more #ik you shouldn't apply to grad school just to go but if i can put off dealing with living a life outside of academia for even 1 year longer #worth the mountains of debt #like even if i drop out and everything goes horribly that's a year i didn't spend saying thank you have a nice day #god. i'm going back to thinking abt lesbian necromancers now. wow that brief look into my mental state sucked

[ban-joey]

sending laser beams to my professor with my mind. kenneth you said midterm grades would b up by this afternoon. it is officially TONIGHT and guess what? kenneth i would love to not be clenching my teeth in my sleep tonight. kenneth i will be sending you a bill in the mail. yes i know its probably a TAs responsibility but i blame you personally. i hate school

#i dont im having a lot of fun (genuinely) but it is often pretty stressful #did find out there are a few folks adjacent to my program doing zoonoses & climate change research so im very excited to chat w them next w #possibly directing my thesis towards one health. social epi gradually becoming less interesting #plus i think my strengths do lie in applying epi to biological concepts so. one health works there #my brain continually trying to get back to lyme disease :( sometimes i really do miss the east coast tbh! #not lying actually i think the number one thing i miss is the amt of vector borne disease research LMFAO #i do unfortunately kind of have a crush on a classmate so that's fine but whatever. grad school. men are nice to me and i lose my mind ig #need to go make out w a hot trans person i think that would solve my problems rn #but also it's nice to be so excited about someone deciding to sit next to me in every class :) #like wow how isolated have i been the last 3 years to be so delighted by like. active signs i have Officially Made Friends. #even if he does live like a block away from my dad and jokes every goddamn day like 'so i saw your dad yesterday' no you DIDNT shut UP #idk yesterday he sat right next to me in a class he usually sits w other people in and it sort of sent my brain off the edge and now im jus #yeah. sitting with this one. it's fine like it's normal. but wowie i do think it's my first time having a Big Ol Crush since (redacted) #a little scary for my animal brain i think but it's okay! #im 25 in like 3 ish weeks and i still get embarrassed about this stuff somehow? stupid. #he's just really nice and always really fun to talk to! i think i had to officially Sit With Myself today bc epi is doing a holiday party #and there's a baking contest and we were talking abt it in class and i was indecisive abt whether i want to participate #and he like fully cut me off and was like oh you should bake something so i can have some :) #and. well fuck now i have to lmao. IM SO EASY IT'S SO EMBARRASSING #good evening everyone. guess this is my journal now. anyway ken rice you owe me twenty dollars and i aim to COLLECT

[maretriarch]

What r ur thoughts on the mlp infection au stuff going around TikTok

I made this post about it and while it's definitely getting to the point where I feel like this uh. dead horse is about as beaten as it can get like there's nothing new or interesting coming out of it anymore and more r absolute garbage than anything even mildly good, there's only so much you can do with zombie stuff. the walking dead phase of mainstream media proves it. but I'll still look at that garbage!!!

my only wish is less like r/childhoodruined r/imsorryjon eldritch garfield boring body horror and more LORE and world building.....I tried finding it but i can't BCS there's literally a million of these fucking things but my favorite is this one that starts out w granny smith and it's a fake like point and click adventure style, where it's a slow creep of sickness and grief and futileness that's way more unchilling than any like. final page of the slideshow "jumpscare" that u know is coming with hyper realistic eyes and a broken jaw.

#weird how ive seen no equestria girls versions #feels like zombies and high school kind if go hand in hand lol #probably bcs its like. the main appeal is WOW what if this thing for LITTLE GIRLS was FUCKED UP and SCARY would that be fucked up or WHAT #same reason why i dont like weed mlp jokes not funny didnt laugh weed is boring go back to spongebong #asks #also...they need kore cute survival outfits......like the cutie remark... #at least back when bronies did mlp but edgy they gave rainbow dash cute military outfits and horse armor!!!!

[dandelions-fly-in-summer-skies]

help it would be really great to have time management skills rn

#i’ve got to do guitar #and songwriting #and record said songs #and facetime my friend #and do the celebration asks #and do this art project for my wall #and i’ve got a bunch of things i need to text ppl abt (cannot remember what but there’s things) #and i’ve got like 6 hours bc i also need to fix my sleep schedule yay #except i’m going out rn and probs won’t be back for ages #actually it’s fine bc i’ve got like a week to do most of these #until school starts #ew #why is school starting in a week #that is not okay #why is FEBRUARY in a week #THAT IS NOT OKAY #it has not been a month of 2024 i refuse to believe it #its still 2023 actually #i have not processed #wow that’s a lot of tags shit maybe i should process #just dandy thoughts

[undyinglantern]

being closer to your 30s than 20s and having nothing to show for it is so

#personal #cannot finish college/uni cannot find a job bc poor mental health being dependent on parents still how pathetic #sometimes im like wow i should be grateful i havent been kicked out yet and then its like i need to be as little of a burden as possible #like gee wonder why i still struggle with an eating disorder after over a decade. if i cant fucking off myself might as well take up as lit #le space and use up as little resources as possible #even if i wanted and could afford to go back and get a degree i still wouldnt know what to major or get a degree in #they tell you in high school its okay to be undecided youll figure it out but what if its been 9 years and i still dont know #i know. i guess. also i understand why communication courses are required for a degree but i have failed or dropped out every single class #failed interpersonal communication one semester bc i kept fucking forgetting to take the weekly online quiz and never stopped kicking my ow #ass over it ever since #tried retaking it another cemester and stopped showing up half way though bc i couldnt deal with it anymore #tried taking public speaking another and literally panicked and didnt show up anymore after the first week/class #and that was when i was 18-20 like when its okay if you dont really have anything major to share about your life #imagine being 26 having to go up and say something about yourself and its like. ive been a depressed homebody for the past 5+ years idk wha #else to tell you

[snekdood]

mfs cant even dress. fuckin. wearing basketball shorts and a nondescript t shirt and short ass hair and have the gall to make fun of other people for dressing different. okay background character

#ok least memorable guy in the room #oh? oh what josh? do you play sports? you real good at your sports ball? #you smoke weed after school n shit? listen to rap music? #and thats your entiiiiiiiiiiiiiire personality. lol. lmao. #oh and its mainstream rap too. like wiz khalifa or somethin. and you never listen deeply to the lyrics or what they say #you only listen to it to feel cool while you smoke your weed. #oh and i bet you make having a care a personality too since theres literally absolutely nothing else remarkable about your character #car* #do ya go fishing? maybe like guns? maybe you just got a dog recently. wow. a real step forward for you and your empty ass soulless life #do you ever volunteer for things? do you ever actually. give a fuck about things? #do you have a hobby outside of sports? do you spend literally any time alone introspecting? #do you cope with life by drinking and vaping with your pals to avoid having to ever have a thought or feel an ounce of regret for being a #piece of shit? #crazy how i can read you like the back of my hand tyler josh stevenson #and by golly do you never question the ethicality of owning a lawn either. thats never crossed your mind. because giving af about anything #has never crossed your mind besides yourself #wonder how dissapointed your mom is in you but never tells you outright #she prolly hoped you would become more. stay a nice sweet little boy. but naur #ya didn't. and now you're pinning after celebrities who wear designer brands. because your life is empty and soulless. #too mean? eh. he needs to hear it.