#yes it's not perfect but by fucking god is it an improvement lol

[hella1975]

the harsher parts of mental illness are always treated so so badly in media and it's genuinely very special to see someone handling them gently - especially because you've said it's very personal for you and that makes it so much easier to like? live in i suppose? because like you said the guilt can be overwhelming and the crushing weight of knowing KNOWING that you're one bad day away from wrecking an important relationship just out of pure FEAR can be so debilitating to live with especially bc people do fundamentally view that as just. a bitch response. knee jerk malice. but it's not half the time it's sheer fear (which doesn't excuse it but it does explain more) so it's nice to see that being treated like the actual complex response it is <3

yes omfg i need to stop getting surprised when taob winds up being incredibly cathartic for me bc i put a bit of myself in it and (shocker!) there are people like that who actually get it. like there are multiple people that to this day ACTIVELY dislike me because i not only said something bad to them but because i ON PURPOSE took the thing i knew would hurt them most and said it in the harshest way i possibly could. like that was a conscious effort on my part i went out of my way to think about what would hurt them and i just went for their jugular. but i wasn't doing it for the sake of meanness any more than i was doing it because they deserved it. like i said before there are two instances when i do this and that's as a defence mechanism or to self-destruct. i dont really do the former anymore - and that took YEARS to grow out of bc that was my Main Response to literally ANY conversation i didnt want to have. people are significantly less likely to ask you personal questions if you immediately try and make them cry when they do lol. this is where 90% of my 'i was a bitch in secondary school' posting comes from - but ironically the less i gave into the former the more it translated into the latter, so i lost either way and so did the people around me. i really dont think im that bad anymore bc i found ways around it and now i cant think off the top of my head anything even CLOSE to what i used to do that's happened recently, but i have YEARS OLD guilt from long dead friendships that i will - and deserve to - live with forever bc regardless of the reasoning behind it i still said terrible things. and like. it never gets talked about bc from an outside pov im very obviously being a complete cunt and who would want to sympathise with that

#like when i get a certain way my go to response to it nowadays is to isolate and typically that would be a bad thing #and a couple weeks ago actually boom noticed me doing it and naturally bc they're a good friend #they were worried and wanted to figure out a way around it bc isolating during a depressive episode is generally considered a Bad Call lol #but the reason i isolate is bc ive now learnt my own tells to figure out when my self-destructive behaviour is gonna start lashing out #like i literally remove myself from people now bc i KNOW if i dont regardless of if they're trying to help me #that dumb voice in my head is either gonna want to get them the fuck away #OR i'll want to like. 'prove' to them that im fundamentally this awful person and they're better off without me #and either way it doesnt end well for anyone involved #like the damage i deal myself by doing that is significantly higher than the damage i deal myself when i isolate #even if neither are particularly enjoyable #and it's got a twisted reassurance to it too like id rather hurt myself alone than take other people down with me #and i like to think that proves that - regardless of how rough around the egdes i am and the hurt ive caused - im actually a kind person #and like. that's what growing up is about! im learning coping mechanisms and ways around it! im getting better! #yes it's not perfect but by fucking god is it an improvement lol #ask #taob asks

[untoldsoup]

Something scary about drawing fan comics is when you're faced with a pose, or a background, or a color scheme that is needed to move the plot forward but you *know* is beyond your skill.

Or even just a character that's hard to draw (looking at you, early versions of bowser lol).

You know it's not turning out and it's not going to be perfect. And it won't be perfect for a while as you figure things out slowly, and the fear everyone else can see you struggled with that one panel, or that one page. Just feeling like everyone can *tell* this is where you faultered and the scope of your story was bigger than what you could do but you pushed forward anyway.

And then I read other artists comics and I wonder if they are having the same struggles. And they *must*, I can't be alone in this, but I don't see those struggles in their work. So surely If I'm reading their comic and I can't see where they faltered or struggled or feel that 'this is the worst page I've ever drawn' then no one else can see it in mine, and we truly are our own worst critic. We judge our own work on a scale we wouldn't judge others by.

You got to remind yourself the viewer most likely won't see those mistakes. And if they do they are already reading the next panel and moving on. They didn't stop to analyze and judge that one mistake that you agonized over yet couldn't properly resolve.

Sometimes when I'm struggling, when a panel is just...not how I want and I realize I've spent so much time trying to fix small things no one will give a shit about I hear that meme in my head, the one that says "fuck it, we'll do it live!" And I move on. It's just gunna be like that. I gotta keep the momentum going. I can't be hung up on one thing.

And the momentum is crucial with comics. You gotta keep moving. Every panel or page you finish helps the next one be better, because soon things you once struggled with are second nature. You gotta use the tools in your toolbox. References are not cheating and every person who ever said that to an artist held that person back from improving. You're never going to fully know how to draw that angle if you don't *look at it*. It wont become second nature to draw if you just hope you can guess right through sheer force of will.

And coloring is fucking hard. It's tedious. Its boring but god when you finally get it right it's so rewarding. When you learn a new thing that makes your work pop.

And you gotta just accept your art will not look the same from page one to page 50 if you're learning as you go. You got to stop being embarrassed. Because it shows you were *learning*. It shows you improved and yes the early pages wont look as good but look!! Look at what you can draw now. It's a visual representation of every new skill, every new technique you learned on the way and we gotta stop cringing at our old work and instead thank it for getting us to where we are now.

#rambling after waking up at 3pm #just working on some really hard panels rn

[quietwingsinthesky]

Ninerose (and/or tenrose if you have different opinions about it)

ninerose

how do i put this. i dont think it's an exaggeration to say that ninerose taught me what love looks like. like yadda yadda broken childhood home and all that, but whatever, i had my doctor who discs. and these two. oh, these two. there's so much about s1 and them that i return to again and again because it's so messy and so sweet and so. hopeful? you know? like here's the doctor, broken, and here's rose, glowing like the sun. and he becomes a better man for her sake. he makes himself worthy of being saved, yes, but she would have saved him anyway. because she loves him so, so much.

like, i know people get annoyed nowadays about how much rose there is in the fandom, how she can get a spotlight other companions never can, but like. god. she really did show up and rewire my fucking brain, and i can't even be mad about it. she's all that and more. and nine, obviously, nine's my. second favorite now, but the doctor closest to my heart forever. there's nothing that can improve my day like watching an episode from s1 and seeing the two of them interact, there really isn't.

tenrose

i do actually have different thoughts on these! simply because all variations of the doctor get slightly different thoughts. i mean, i don't really ship specific doctors with specific characters, if that makes sense? if they win the hearts of one doctor, then to me, they've won the hearts of all of them. so, i do ship rose with every doctor lol. but ten we got on screen so let me talk about that.

i think tenrose, the way it's written, is a perfect follow up to how ninerose set them up. you know, you've got a kiss on the doctor's side that killed him and only he remembers happening, and on rose's side, her doctor just exploded into a twink. i love how upset rose is by it. i've seen people talk about how unfair she's being or how unreasonable she is, crying because she thinks the man she was falling in love with is gone when the doctor's right there but. he exploded in front of her. she has no information on this, except to hope that it really is her doctor. god, the children in need special where they reconnect immediately post him regenerating is so important to me for this reason. this is upsetting! this isn't something that we should judge rose for not simply rolling with it! but in the end, that is her doctor. changed, slightly, to be loved is to be changed. but it's him.

and yeah, can we talk about the whole ten literally rebuilt himself to be for rose and how that fact fucks him up forever and ever <3 literally a disaster of a man, you can't do that, sir. that's not healthy!!! but i love him for that. it's so doctor-ish of him. in the wake of her becoming a goddess of time and space to save him, how could he not remake himself in her image. to be someone he thinks she will love, that can love her better. i just. sorry going to speak briefly on nine again, but i think about how the majority of the bad wolf scene is framed with every shot of him on his knees, looking up at her. how he only rises back up at the very end to kiss her and save her life in return. that's what i think ten is born out of, more than anything. that moment of terrifying, awestruck devotion, and then the choice to rise again and hope he's enough, know he's enough, to save her life.

and that is always ten. that's him in the satan pit jumping without knowing where the bottom is and then yelling in the face of the devil that he only knows of one goddess, and it's her. that's why when rose is in danger, nothing on this earth can stop him. that's why he burns up a star to say goodbye to her, because that's the only thing in the universe that could be worthy of being exchanged for even a glimpse at her. and it's him when he tries to snuff himself out during the runaway bride, and it's him when he spends so long not being able to see martha for how fantastic she is because all he can do is mourn rose, and it's him when he's so distracted by her finding him again that he gets himself shot by a DALEK.

insane to me, actually. he was literally born wrong out of love.

and not even to mention rose. let's not pretend she's not equally on this train. hello: woman who would have been okay with being trapped with him on the other end of time and the universe from home? woman who was going to ditch all the people she knew and loved in another dimension to stay with him? woman who started blasting herself haphazardly across dimensional barriers with a cannon to find him again? she's as bad as he is. i love her.

[put any ship in my ask box and i’ll give my brutally honest opinion]

#ask #tenrose #ninerose #im realizing. see the thing is the appeal of 'brutally honest opinion' might be to some people for me to tear shit apart #but like. there's only about four ships in the history of ever that annoy me enough to hate them. #and everything else im easily invested in or don't care enough to hate. #so like. i hope yall like gushing <3

[shirubiaowo]

I JUST FINISHED THE EPISODE OH MY GODS HELLO???????

i wanna know more about heaven tbh. they didnt know about the exterminations??????

i feel like the reveal about vaggie was like kinda predictable tbh but it was still cool to see. i hope it doesnt cause miscommunication issues though

THE REPRISE OF HELL IS FOREVER WAS COOL and seeing angel improve was like aaaaahhhh love it

idk why i didnt think the exterminators' faces were masks though lol

also the angel designs are cool but it was like so much sensory overload i need someone to hold my hand and be like "there are the people and these are the angels" LMAO

also i loved how angel handled nifty it was so cute lol

YES THAT WAS A SURPRISE THAT ONLY ADAM AND THE HEAD ANGEL BITCH WAS a surpiseee like fuck I guess the angels up in heaven are in hella bliss

Omg I was totally watching a vaggie is an angel theory the other day

NO THE REPRISE WAS LIKE SO GOOD,, WHEN I HEARD THE MOTIF I WAS LILE GUAD DAUMNNN

Tho like me too I thought the masks were faces,, that makes me wonder what Adam looks like 😭😭

Ouuuu did you see Angel dust’s sister in the welcome to hell song!!! So cute,,, and all the designs were so pastel but yes yessss sensory overload

Angel dust has come so far he is such a perfect baby 🥺💛💛

#xen!! #EPISODE SIX WAS SUCH A BANGER #I NEED MORE EPISODES NOWWW 😭😭

[bigdsgirl]

Live thoughts of Doctor Slump Finale

Because I don't I have the capacity to do anything else

If you open the cut and go "damn heidi chill", here is a summary of my reaction:

Warning: this will not be coherent. :)

THEY MAKING ALCOHOL TOGETHER! He wants to celebrate every moment with her!!! I am in LOVE!!!

HE MADE HIS OWN NOODLES!!!! Ba-da!! I am so proud of you!!!!

Lol Jeong woo, you know how to be too honest

omg y'all reliving the magical evening - same girlies, same

Ba-da's first PAYYYYYYYYYYYCHECK!!!! Proud of our lil worm <3

he wants to buy her meat!!!!!! stop!!!! as an elder sister, this is a MOMENT! and the photoshoot is everything. a plus.

boy time boy time! these two crack me up. truly besties forever

let's fight! fight to the death! ah yes, never change

I've been watching too much dune, that's all I could think about when I saw the patient

look at our girl! being a supportive professor <3

thoughtful boyfriend (husband of my heart)

oh no this man thinks she is gonna say yes

the HAIR FLIP I LOVE HIM!

oh wait wait wait so what was she gonna say if she found out about the US stuff AFTER talking about their date!!!

he is so babygirl <3 my PRINCESS i luv him

the honesty about his nerves! let's communicate!

SO SHE WAS GONNA SAY YES AJGKFLGDJALKGJd

oh fuck that's an amazing opportunity - she's gotta do it! she's gotta!

I want you to always follow your heart - I am deceased they are so amazing together

most mature drama (in the best fucking way ugh this makes me so happy)

and I know he is still stressed and freaking, but that his first move is to make sure she goes! gah!

LOL the VASE! THE STEAK! this man is dying a bit inside

he was made for this role, his monologues kill me! every time!

the worming on the bed LOOOOL

bestie cheer jeong-woo up! right! now! <3

the leave and let me be in the elevator and Dr. Bin's response -- i am in stitches!!

LETS FREAKING GO HONG RAN!! Baddie of the century!!! fuck yeah! the wink agjdlkfgjalkdfg

wait! girly! please! don't resign! where you going I love you putting Dr. Bin in his place! wait never mind she wants to travel, I support this <3

I am leaving to pursue my happiness! that's RIGHT!

sad puppy jeong-woo is everything to me. i just wanna squish his cheeeeeks!

oh the perfect words, just what he needed to hear.

these two are just giving me cavities LEFT AND RIGHT!!!!

they are so supportive of each other! they talk it out! they love each other! i LOVE THEM SO MUCH!

my dramatic prince - omfg they are sobbing together already lkajfgaldk;fgjadfklgj

oh wait they TOOK BACK THE OFFER???? oh wait that did not go where I thought it would.

oh girl you gotta blurt it out. TELL HIM NOW.

Jeong-woo is a water sign right ? as a big three triple water sign, he's GOTTA BE!

THE PARTY JAKLDFJGLKAF - this is gonna be hilarious. i love the flower on uncle's head hehehehe

the sad singing oh my god this is so funny

wait he SAW! omg! what! and the dramatics, silly gooses

I am so glad she advocated for herself - even if she didn't go her way and she was just expressing her frustration.

god they have grown so much, it's so beautiful to see

he took classes! my beloveds!

oh she's taking the test! and it's improved! oh I am so happy for her. what a beautiful journey we have been on together.

i love the message that getting better is not being happy again, it's about building strength and confidence that you can step through the difficult moments

oh Dr. Bin, don't dig yourself into a hole ya dumb dumb (love you though)

mother son bonding! love this

I am going to miss Ha-neul's mom so much. she is such a beautiful soul. 😭😭😭😭

I was wondering when my Kopiko ad placement would arrive, and A+ work

Hong-ran please, I can't take this romantic speech now. I am weak.

omg! Jeong-woo is opening his own clinic! omg HE TOLD HIM TO GO! I adore you sir.

these two have my heart.

FANCY CAR FOR MY FANCY MAN! Love it and him. ooooooooo sir you look fab in the fancy suit. bahaha, i love the switch to reality and how much happier he is! <;3

oh my, what a gorgeous clinic (working at a FQHC, our clinics so different lol)

WAIT WHO IS THIS GIRL???????????????????? omg. omg uncle get the girl let's freaking GO. wait. wait. oh my fucking god he opened this for HER? someone hold me, I am going to faint.

the little wave at her husband's grave, I am unwell.

Dr. Bin -- i'm sorry but oh my god what are you doing. his daughter just staring at him, i love it.

oh my god the photo of the four of them on her desk!!!! *screaming*

is the anesthesiologist gonna be a private detective?

aw man, he's gonna go work for our king jeong-woo, still dope tho.

WELL GO SEE THE SUNRISE NOW YA CUTIES!

*sobs at all these beautiful moments*

Jeong-woo, you are a better man than I, I would be spitting on that grave : )

what a gorgeous sunrise, what gorgeous beans!

WEDDING PHOTOSHOOT IS NEXT WEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!! JGKLDAGFJDLAKFGJ

he's so excited to get his answer i love them

running on the beach??? bye. I will be dying now from all this love.

oh my god the photoshoot at all the spots important to them AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

in conclusion: i love them and i adore this drama.

#kdrama #doctor slump #WHYYYYYYYYYYY MUST IT BE OVER #my joy #ugh i love them #yeo jeong woo #nam ha neul #bin dae young #lee hong ran #heidi watches doctor slump #heidi watches

[amoebab22]

Out here writing post game Galemance dialogue and Gale is the biggest lesbian I've ever met I adore him. Sapphic energy with pansexual attraction. Uhaul is packed and ready. He has a cat and a library and loves to cook and will tell everyone how perfect you are at the slightest provocation.

A snippet (lol if something this long can be a "snippet") of the fic (exists in the same universe as Fenstarion content):

Making his way through the stacks, Gale soon came upon the section he was looking for. Truly the library here was so intuitively organized. Perhaps he should rearrange his own to match? Though he could nearly hear Tara and Astarion grousing as they helped. For a later date, then.

As he rounded a corner into the bookshelf-lined enclave, he was met by the sight of an unfamiliar tiefling woman sitting in a circle of books on the floor.

“Oh, pardon me, I was-”

“Hold on,” she said brusquely, holding up a hand. Well, that was rather rude, especially given it was her that was blocking an entire section of books.

The woman frowned, flipping a page, and cursed, before waving her hand casually and sending every book back to its location on the shelves.

Her movements and lack of incantation puzzled Gale, until it dawned on him.

“You're a sorcerer?” He asked, quite surprised. He ran into sorcerers so rarely.

The woman stood and looked up, her expression icy. “Yes, I'm a sorcerer. What, did you expect me to be eating crayons in a corner?”

Despite her rather diminutive height, the woman stood as tall as she could, arms crossed and tail swishing like an angry cat.

Ah, a sore point for her, then.

Gale smiled, trying to remember how exactly to be charming. He'd gotten out of practice after the orb, but he'd been improving since the Absolute business. He was absolutely certain he was capable of charm; he'd charmed the goddess of magic, hadn't he?

He had, hadn't he? She'd liked him for more than his command of the Weave...right?

“Oh, I think that's a bit more in a warlock's wheelhouse, don't you?” Gale raised a conspiratorial eyebrow. Yes! That was quite charming. He still had it!

He saw the reluctant twitch of a smile.

“Suppose so. Not exactly a smart move to tie yourself to a mercurial patron.” She studied him, and Gale noticed her eyes lacked the typical black sclera of a tiefling. They were, however, a very lovely shade of purple. Purple always was Gale's favorite color.

Apparently deciding she approved of what she saw, the woman held out her hand. “Velanna Milthor.”

Gale took her hand and shook it, giving a slight bow. “Gale Dekarios.”

Something flashed across Velanna’s face, and Gale felt a pit in his stomach. Please don't let her bring up Mystra; Gale was very sick of discussing his ex and his colossal fuck up with the Karsite weave. He really felt that saving the entire world should have overridden the other, but he supposed it was far less salacious to simply defeat an Elder Brain.

“The new illusion professor? I haven't seen you at any of the faculty get-togethers; I assumed you were an illusion, too.”

Gale was confused. What get-togethers was she talking about? Was she faculty? He'd never heard of her; perhaps she was in another department.

Come to think of it, he hadn't really met any of the other faculty save the professor that taught after him in the lecture hall.

Velanna’s face twitched in what was probably very well contained rage. “No need to look so confused about a little sorceress teaching; I promise I'm fully literate.”

“What? Oh! Oh no, that's not it at all-certainly it’s less common, given your innate ability, but really-” Gods, he was butchering this. He sighed. “I apologize. I was confused about the faculty meet ups. I... didn't realize they existed.”

Velanna's face softened to what was nearly a look of pity. “No one told you?”

Gale put on his best optimistic smile. This definitely didn't remind him of his extremely isolated childhood...or his extremely isolated adulthood. It was not yet another slight in a long string of slights that wore him down slowly.

“Oh, not to worry; I'm sure it just got lost in the shuffle of things. In fact, I'll go check my mailbox. Or maybe Tara-”

Velanna put a hand on his arm and patted it. “Look, they're mostly assholes anyway; you're not missing out.” She paused for a moment, seeming to weigh her options. “Let's get something to eat. The other professors are about as fond of a tiefling sorcerer as they are the chosen of Mystra.” She looked off to the side, thinking. “Or...former chosen? Are you one of her Chosen again? Eh, whatever. Come on.”

Gale thought about saying no and going about his research but the truth was, after the weeks on the road with his tadpole cohort, he found himself rather lonely with just Tara in the tower. Oh, certainly Fenora and Astarion had visited, even Shadowheart when she'd been in town, but not since the party a month or two ago had he really felt...accepted by a group. Velanna wasn't a group, but he'd be one person closer to it if they got on well.

And being invited to lunch did take a bit of the sting out of finding out the other professors weren't inviting him to their parties.

______

“So then, I figured, well I'm already in trouble so I might as well just go for it.”

Gale leaned forward. “No!”

Velanna gave him a wicked smile. “Oh yes.”

“You didn't!”

“I most certainly did.” She leaned back, looking smug. “Anyway, that's how I got banned from the Yawning Portal when I was only ten.” Velanna let out a nostalgic sigh. “And they're still enforcing that ban 25 years later. Tried to go in the other day and the bartender yelled ‘Oh no you don't, you little shit. I remember you!’ Bouncer came towards me and I turned and scuttled out the door.”

Gale was laughing so hard he nearly choked on his drink. “My gods! And I thought my magma mephit incident was bad.”

Velanna grinned. “I mean, that one was pretty good, I won't lie, but sorcerer kids have the advantage of unlimited imagination and the questionable ability to make it real on the fly. At least you all get slowed down juuuuust a little by having to put in the effort to learn. I have no idea how I'm not dead, honestly.”

“A disastrous combination, truly. Though the need to study never did seem to slow me down enough to make good choices.” Gale shook his head slightly, remembering all the foolishness he'd gotten himself into. “Ah, youth. What a time.”

“Excuse you, I'm still young.” Velanna appeared to be feigning offense, so Gale kept his tone light. Look at him! Bantering like it was completely natural! Perhaps he was back to his old self.

“Oh, forgive me. Far be it from me to imply a lady is anything but eternally young and beautiful.”

“Thank you, thank you.” She smiled, taking a sip from her drink. They'd finished eating some time ago and were simply enjoying the lovely weather on the tavern’s patio. Gale hadn't had this much fun since...well, probably since the get together Withers had arranged. Velanna was quite funny, and quick as a whip, too.

And...rather pretty, if he was honest.

He'd never spent much time with tieflings other than Karlach and, to some extent, the tieflings they met at the Grove. As Karlach wasn’t really his type (though a delight to travel with, certainly, and striking in her way), he'd never really thought about a tiefling through that lens.

Gale had to know someone a bit before he could judge whether or not they were attractive. Fenora, for example, was handsome, but Gale was relatively certain he'd only found them intimidating at first. They were so very tall and angular, after all. Their partner Astarion was by all outside accounts an Elven god of sculpted marble, but Gale thought him more...cute than anything. A bit like a puppy. Of course he'd never tell the man that; it would crush him.

Velanna, at first, had simply been short and a dark teal color. Having spoken with her for...gods, a few hours! How that had flown by. Anyway, having gotten to know her a bit, Gale was inclined to find her pretty, with her dark blue-green braids and purple eyes. But more importantly, she was intensely charming. He supposed that came with the territory for sorcerers.

“You know, the other professors are missing out. You're a fun lunch buddy. Way more fun than any of them. They're ungodly boring. I don't think a single one of them summoned a Tressym out of spite.”

Gale smiled a bit at the praise. “Well, if that's your idea of fun, I have to warn you: I've calmed down a bit since childhood.”

Velanna shrugged. “So have I, mostly. Still, at least you've done something other than sit around debating whether it's better to cast a confusion spell clockwise or counterclockwise.” She grimaced.

“I suppose I have, though my most recent escapades were not by choice.” He smiled. “And the answer is counterclockwise, clearly. I don't even know why they'd bother to debate it.”

“Oh, obviously.” Velanna rolled her eyes. “Wizards.”

Gale noticed Velanna's tail swished behind her, almost playfully, the same way Tara’s did when she went after a pigeon. He wondered if it meant the same thing for tieflings.

“Would you like to make this a regular occurrence?” He blurted, before gathering himself. “Lunch, I mean. It's nice to have someone besides Tara to talk to.” Oh, that sounded pathetic. “About magic, and such,” he added, trying to save the invitation from sounding too desperate. Hopefully it worked.

“I'd like that. I've got a full schedule for the next couple days, but after that, sure.”

“Most excellent. It's lovely to be among peers again. There were other casters in our group-namely a warlock and a cleric-but it's not quite the same as another wizard. Or sorcerer, of course.” Damn, he was going to keep messing that up. Velanna knew the intricacies of the Weave far better than any sorcerer he'd encountered. Though, really, how many had Gale encountered? Very few.

“And I enjoy talking to someone who's actually left their creepy little tower in the last 50 years.” She took another drink. “No offense, but the tower thing is weird. Why not just have a normal house? Why a tower specifically?”

Gale smiled. “Tradition? Efficient land use? A large number of stairs to keep us in shape?”

“I think I'll stick to my cottage. Not a big fan of heights.”

“Hmmm, that does sound rather nice. I assume you have a garden, perhaps a few chickens?”

“A garden, of course. What's a cottage without one?” She smiled. “As to animals, I actually keep bees, so if you're ever in need of honey or beeswax, I've got both in droves. Sometime we'll have to have lunch there and I can unload a bunch of bee products on you. I'm not a great cook, but fresh vegetables cover a multitude of sins.”

“Well, not to worry! I quite like to cook. You'll have to come to my tower some time as well. You would quite like Tara, and I'm sure she would like you. She's always encouraging me to have more guests over; nearly like having a second mother.”

Did that sound pathetic? Gods, it did, didn't it?

Regardless, Velanna laughed. “Well, I can’t possibly disappoint a Tressym. I'll send you a note once I've got my teaching schedule figured out for next week.... unfortunately, sorcery students are often as chaotic as you'd expect. I have several wild magic sorcerers I'm trying to help. My classes got canceled today because one of them turned himself into a sheep and was too embarrassed to let me fix it.”

Gale let out a surprised laugh before tamping it down. “Oh my, that is... unfortunate.”

Velanna grinned. “Oh, it's exactly as hilarious as you'd expect. You should sit in some time.”

“I may just have to do that.”

#bg3 fanfiction #fanfiction #bg3 #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #gale x oc #tiefling oc

[thymechaos]

okay but i think the aspects should just be summed up with bullet points and ~vibes~ and no one is allowed to tell me i’m wrong. here’s my GREAT ANALYSIS.

blood:

okay fine but you’ll complain the whole time

always having a headache is definitely a personality trait

“if i almost kill myself trying to help to help you, will you finally shut up?”

the hot takes will continue until morale improves

this power nerfed empath character will not stop getting in trouble and putting everyone else in danger (not clickbait)

space:

you will never stop being underestimated

(watching everyone else fuck up) “clearly i should have prevented this”

usage of deadly force is a great way to get the plot to actually pay attention to you, keep it up!

you are tired of trying to fix people, and desperate for someone to make you worse already

being so fucking funny but people think that you are sincere: a tragedy

hope:

everything happens so much oh god

you are trying your best (performance varies wildly)

(two seconds after doing a thing) “oh this is bad, i should not have done this”

“PLEASE PERCEIVE ME” “okay” “NO, NOT LIKE THAT”

in the right circumstances you are stupidly OP. in the wrong circumstances you are STILL stupidly OP, and you’re about to make it everyone’s problem.

life:

if everyone would just listen to you, they would still get in trouble, but you’re pretty sure it would be BETTER trouble

“you either die a hero, or live long enough to decide that you do what you want (you will probably still die)”

anything you can’t solve with flow charts and color-coded markers, can DEFINITELY be solved with a large enough crowbar and plenty of duct tape

it’s not that you don’t love your friends, it’s just that they could occasionally work a bit harder at deserving it

level of cheerfulness directly proportional to how close you are to hauling off and stabbing someone with the nearest implement, and that’s very sexy of you

light

literally the opposite the of “not good, not bad, just nice”

(watching everyone else fuck up) “lol amateurs”

it’s not that you don’t have crippling insecurities, it’s just that you have decided that those are just as awesome as the rest of you

hating you is not a personality trait, but if that’s all some people have then who are you to stop them?

everything about you is GREAT for getting shit done, but TERRIBLE at parties.

void

you will never stop being misinterpreted

wanting something all the time sounds exhausting, this is a Vibes Only zone

you could literally tell people that you are manipulating them and they would still actively claim that you are not. you are mystified by this.

i was reborn as a pivotal plot instrument that is almost never recognized as such: the anime

this would be such a long list if we included ALL your different & highly convenient personalities, and we don’t have time for that

time

“yes, but can i fight it” is not a coping mechanism. no, really.

either learn that self-sacrifice is not the same as selflessness, or be unbearable forever

(watching yourself fuck up repeatedly) “there was literally no way i could’ve avoided this”

being aware of your main character syndrome doesn’t change what it is

fatalism is not a personality trait, but if it was it would be a terrible one. pick something else. nihilism, on the other hand, looks super cute on you and matches all your shoes. slay.

mind

“mom friend” “grandpa friend” ok but has anyone considered the benefits of a “deranged cousin who probably has mob connections friend”

(watching yourself fuck up repeatedly) “lol amateur”

you’ve found the perfect balance between being too plot relevant and not being plot relevant enough, and this is what makes you terrifying

is it spite or is it affection? yes.

assigned manic pixie dream girl at birth, and about to make it everyone’s problem

doom

your relevance to the plot is inversely proportional to your own personal well-being. just… stand still and try not to breathe too loud.

if you loved your friends less, i might be able to talk about it more. or, you know, talk about anything except how profoundly stupid all of their decision are <3

you have decided that being too tired to dress properly is a fashion statement

your ability to JUST WALK OUT is truly inspiring, people should be more like you

“that’s rough, buddy”

breath

your ability to JUST WALK OUT is a problem, people should consider not being like you

(two seconds after doing a thing) “okay this is bad, but it could obviously be a lot worse so i’m fine”

either learn the difference between optimism and outright denial, or be unbearable forever

you think that you’re a Vibes Only person, but if you were to stop wanting things all the time you would in fact die

“not today satan” is not a coping mechanism. it’s literally the opposite of that.

rage

everything about you is TERRIBLE for getting shit done, but GREAT at parties

everyone would like it if you stopped going apeshit and tried being nice instead

learning the difference between nihilism and just stabbing people is an important part of character development. it’s also very hard. it’s okay.

(two seconds after doing a thing) “ooooh this is bad… but how can i make it worse?”

chaotic dick energy

heart:

paradoxically, the ONLY way you are good at manipulating people is by convincing them that you are manipulating them.

wanting things all the time is exhausting and you would like to stop. but you cannot.

you are trying your best (performance varies wildly)

the fact that the previous point was identical to someone else’s means that you’re not totally unique in every way, and you’re having a crisis about it

being so fucking sincere but everyone thinks that you are funny: a tragedy

#homestuck #classpect #but actually just #aspects #homestuck aspect #homestuck analysis #such analysis #much serious #wow #important discourse #if people that this seriously i’m going to implode #oh wait shit i need to cite sources #source: trust me bro #source: i’m a knight of hope #source: i’m the worst person to listen to #long post

[btnclmrttn]

Hello! AH I've been wanting to send a request but don't know what to say xD Been wondering if you could do a four horsemen x singer fem!reader? Kida like how they act towards her and in the concerts, fans or backstage that kinda stuff. (You can do it if you want to of course! Will always adore your works for this fandom <3)

yes yes ofc my dude I'm loving this ask 💕 sry if it took too long

Fem!Singer!Reader

~~~~

Saitama

You never fail to amaze homeboy over here with your talent

He does ask you to sing him songs, anything you make up or write is perfectly fine, mostly when he's falling asleep. Being baby n shit

Dude is a menace with instruments. Says "hey babe look I can play too" and bust out some god awful ear-ache of a tune. Completely as a joke, thankfully.

He doesn't stick around backstage much but he will sit with you if you're having some make up done or doing some sound checks. Mostly because it's very noisy and it can overstimulate him easy

That doesn't mean he won't attend your performance granted if he gets a free seat lol he's a pretty chill hypeman but hypeman nonetheless

He'll try an keep a distance from you but not too much. He's more private with congratulations and praise so you have time with your fans. Makes you a nice dinner too.

Damn, though, the fact you would be recognized more than him might bruise his ego but he won't admit it because you deserve the spotlight

If you get any hate mail he usually just tries to toss it before you read it. Stuff doesn't get to him like it might you unless it about u and he doesn't want you to have any doubt in your mind how special you are

Genos

I feel I shouldn't have to say but will anyway, definitely #1 hypeman out of the other three

Bro got perfect pitch he can throw you a note of help out if you need it. Or play an instrument for you if needed. Would be determined to teach himself all you can play to help with your efficiency and improvement

Half his notebook is now full of music theory and he's constantly trying to make a logical formula for this form of artistry

Dude is always backstage and will go out of his way to make sure everything is perfect. Ppl might get annoyed by him but others really appreciate his assistance with sound checks and what not

He would also rather stay backstage/helping any tech crew if needed when watching you perform. Mostly to avoid any screaming that drowns out your perfect voice. Best seat in the house

You could probably make a whole botanical garden with the amount of flowers he gives you. All at fucking once

High alert when you're around fans. Has quite the face if they get too close. He doesn't want any perv creeps trying to have a way at you.

Respectful tho and steps away if ppl come up and ask for a photo/autograph. He's so proud of u bro

All hate mail is incinerated. All haters are damn near the same.

Sonic

#2 hypeman over here, to say the least. He comes with musical talent

(HC) His village had their own traditional instruments and styles of music. It's a nice perspective when expanding territory and a sweet bonding experience trying to teach each other your respective skilled instruments

He is a busy guy but he always tries to at least stop by to wish you luck. He's great to have around if you might have forgotten anything, as he's quick to fix it/get.

Sometimes he chips in with any stage makeup you may do (lemme tell u, he'd be great at any alternative or gothic subculture makeup)

Also tries to attend a full concert but if he has to go he'll try and be back for the end. Always has a flower for you

He doesn't have a problem with fans at all. He's happy you have people that you inspire and that look up to you.

Of course he is on standby for creeps. He's quick to trip them on their ass and nobody would know what happened. Or a smack on the back of their head

Has a personal hit list for haters (stop him he's srs)

Garou

He is such a simp it's rediculous. He LOVES that you can sing

Doesn't know shit about music though, sorry. He sucks to say the least. Would probably fuck up playing a triangle

Could also be sung to sleep but he's too embarrassed to ask. Even humming works. It could knock his ass out cold

He is always following you around (from a distance) backstage. Doesn't say much, just observing. He's trying to learn some idea about how things work so he doesn't feel completely ignorant

Also hangs around during a show but WAY on the side. He stands out from the crowd though no doubt. He looks like a body guard and would probably be there for you before your actual body guards

The concept of your fans threw him WAY OFF at first. Might experience jealousy. Strangers just basically toppling you for your attention? Thinks they need a life secretly. He can handle it after shows but surprises in public makes him him a little bratty

His praise is subtle, and a little awkward. He just gives a blunt "Nice job" while avoiding eye contact. With enough awkward silence he'll tell you what he liked about it. He's really trying but he has no idea what to say if you've heard it all before. V proud of you tho

Put this man on a leash or he'll tear every hater/hate mail to pieces. It won't be pretty

#one punch man #opm #opm x reader #opm headcanons #opm hcs #saitama #genos #garou #sos sonic #saitama x reader #garou x reader #genos x reader #sos sonic x reader #saitama hcs #saitama headcanons #saitama x y/n #genos x y/n #genos headcanons #anime #genos hcs #sos sonic hcs #sos sonic x y/n #garou hcs #garou headcanons #garou opm #garou the hero hunter #caped baldy #blonde cyborg #the four horseman of opm

[narrators-journal]

Silence is golden V.2.0

Ah yes, a whole sleepless night is the perfect time to rewrite a scenario! I see no issues or flaws in this logic.

In all seriousness tho, I’ve kinda been wanting to go back and rewrite some of my older works that just. Embarrass me to look back on. And, while this one wasn’t exactly EMBARRASSING, I also wasn’t super duper proud of the itty bitty, rushed three paragraphs I put out the first time. I still don’t know much about the kyoto trip, but I wanted to try my hand again at injecting some life into this idea and not copping out as much lol. Hope it’s an improvement~

Kyoto was a beautiful place with plenty of places to visit. Minato knew that first hand, as Junpei had spent the first two days of their stay in the gorgeous place. So, for the first night, Minato had crashed the second he’d been allowed to lay his head on his pillow for the evening. But, on this night, after another full day of being drug around and pulled every which way by his friends, Minato was simply too wound up to crash that way a second time.

So, with Akihiko’s snores in the air, and Aigis’ permission to risk an encounter with Ryoji in the hotsprings, the wildcard trudged into the men’s locker room to strip down for a dip. Which, was where he spotted the first signs of possible company in the hot springs in the form of a cubby with the privacy curtain pulled shut. Fuck it. If it’s a girl, she can see me naked. I need a god damned soak.

With that, the blue-haired man stepped out into the steam-warmed air of the dark night. The gentle clouds of steam on top of the pool created by the clash of cool, crisp winter air with the hot water that almost melted Minato’s muscles into butter as soon as he slipped a foot into it. It was peaceful. The whole setting was blissfully peaceful. With no well-intentioned best friends to talk his ear off, no Aigis to loom over him like a hawk on the look out for her nemesis, and no hyper-active brunettes to yap at him for affection. Minato could simply soak in the warm water and let the miles he’d walked wash away.

At least, that’s what the shaggy-haired man thought for the first five or so minutes of his soak. But, after that, something began to feel off. So, he lifted his head to scan over the misty pool and the fencing and bushes that lined the tastefully rock-decorated space.

There.

With his back against the large rock in the middle of the water, someone wasactually in the water with him. Barely above the surface of the water and nearly hidden by the combination of moonlit shadows and steam, was Ryoji Mochizuki. The ever popular transfer student who the wildcard had last seen with a gaggle of girls chasing him through out Kyoto. Though, now that their classmates weren’t around, and only the round moon was there to play witness, the gorgeous brunette looked...exhausted.

His full, round face was usually aglow with a constant, golden retriever-esque happiness that shone from his vibrant sapphire eyes at all times. Yet, as he sat, sunk deep enough into the hot spring water that only his eyes and nose were shown, that lively energy seemed to have drained into the water. His blue eyes looked dull with the dark bags beneath them, even from Minato’s distance, and his skin, always teetering into a nocturnal paleness, seemed almost sickly in the silver light of the moon.

Should I say hi to him? Make sure he’s not about to drown? Minato asked himself as he watched the pretty man soak. But, when Ryoji’s tired eyes met his own, he instantly decided against it.

Ryoji looked like he’d been run over by a semi-truck. The weight of his extroversion having somehow squeezed every last drop of the energetic man’s social battery from him more aggressively than Junpei had managed with Minato’s own battery. Though, both seemed to recognize their mutual social exhaustion. So, neither said a word. They both simply let the warm water of the hotspring melt away their troubles in silence. Peaceful, glorious silence.

#Persona 3 #Ryoji Mochizuki x persona 3 protagonist #persona #persona 3 reloaded #Ryoji Mochizuki x Makoto Yuuki #scenario #ask rewrite #Ryoji Mochizuki #rewrite #Ryoji Mochizuki x minato arisato #Male!persona 3 protagonist #makoto yuuki #minato arisato #no sleep #I'm just running on vibes

[doomedblade]

20 questions for fic writers

I was tagged by @applepi00!! I'm also crossposting on Dreamwidth, because you know how reliable the tungle is. :')

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

35!

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

391,557

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Right now? Baldur's Gate 3 while clearing off some Genshin fic.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

unsurprisingly, IWAK [soukoku genderswap fic]

wet eyed [skk omegaverse fic]

i know the grass beyond the door [hades game thanzag]

lightless miles and miles [soukoku genderswap ANGST]

Moonsung [skk royalty AU, abandoned]

Honestly, it's hilarious looking at this list because bar 1 and 3, I feel very little affection for any of these fics. The curse of writing for a popular ship and then only writing for rarepairs 😩

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Eeeeh. I tend to respond to comments on fics that are WIPs or I feel a particular affection for; otherwise, nope.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

100000000% The World Aflame. Albedo/Venti destroying a city together??? Yeesh.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Uhhhh.... maybe my P5 Ryuji/Akira fic? But that's just shameless fluff all the way through, so...

8. Do you get hate on fic?

I've had a few death threats, but they've disappeared since I made all my fic archive-locked.

9. Do you write smut?

Sometimes, yeah--but I definitely feel more comfortable in M-rated fic. :')

10. Do you write crossovers?

Nah--but I do write a lot of AUs, if that counts.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

HAHAH SO. I wrote a Danny Phantom fic back in 2010 when I was like ~12 and someone stole the premise and wrote it better than me. I was so furious I locked the FFN account and it sits there, immortalised forever--or until FFN dies, which may be soon tbqh.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Several. It never fails to make me incredibly happy. I've also had podfic written, which is also hugely !!!!!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yep!

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Kirk/Spock.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably won’t?

And By Morning, my Albedo/Aether American Gods AU. It's delicious, but I also wrote it ~3 years ago so I'd have to start again from scratch because I now think the prose is kind of trash LOL. It's such a sexy concept though.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I... like writing? Does that count? LOL. I'm not sure what I'm good at, really. I just hope I make it enjoyable to read.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Plotting--although this is something I'm actively working to improve. Also, not editing as I write.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Has to be a really careful balance. I personally am a hater on the Google Translate translation, where someone just dumps a sentence in English into their target language and pastes it wholesale into their fic--unless it's something you can reasonably expect folks to know, like using mijo/mija in a fic about Spanish speakers.

I think it can go into cringe territory super fast, though, depending on the level of slang. But if you're looking for cringe, then go ahead!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

God, fuck. I don't even know?? My memory is shocking. I definitely wrote and posted Sherlock fic on my old AO3 account, and I wrote that Danny Phantom fic mentioned above. Maybe it's Danny Phantom fic ?????

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Short fic: talk to me (talk to yourself), which I wrote in a fugue in like an hour. It's SO perfect I can't even be mad at it.

Long fic: cross the rivers of my mind, which I'm gonna finish next year!! 😤😤😤

If anyone else wants to play, feel free, and feel free to tag me! >:)

#writing tag #many thoughts...

[velvethopewrites]

Happy

@practicecourts and @dontwant-dontcare (many thanks!) both asked me for five things that make me happy and I wasn’t going to answer because honestly? I couldn’t even think of two this morning but after getting lost inside a lovely fluffy bouncy story, my outlook has improved (! Behold! The power of Fic!)  So, without further adieu:

1) coffee, coffee makes me happy - it’s the ritual of it - the flavor I pick, the type of cream I want, the little nudge with my automatic milk frother and then that first taste….*smacks lips* ah, yes. Happiness in a cup. I have often said I am a tea drinker that drinks coffee out of necessity, but I can admit, after all these years, that I do enjoy my first cup. Tea owns me the rest of the day, but that first hour belongs to the bean.

2) my cat - in so many ways, but specifically the way he stretches and meows at me as I pet him - he gives me this look like, oh, please, oh please? And I get sucked into giving him an all over body rub that he just…luxuriates into and it never fails to make me smile. It’s such a tactile thing - petting animals is one of the simplest, yet happiest things…

3) Music- music makes me happy - from punk rock to soft cello to 80s new wave to jazz to back again - it’s all connected and we form memories with sound and some songs can just suck you back to where you were when you heard them - like when I think of R.E.M, I think of being in college and hearing someone blaring it over their speakers across the quad during one perfect-the leaves-are-changing autumn day, or when I hear Nina Simone crooning I Want A Little Sugar in My Bowl and I immediately remember all the nights I spent listening to it on repeat, singing it in my bedroom pretending I was wrapped up in satin and silk and smoky bars…yeah, music makes me happy.

4) Laughter - always, but specifically, laughter I’ve caused. I love making people laugh. Like, throw their head back, forget who and where they are-laughing. It’s a joy, a gift, and a pure pleasure that makes my toes curl. Sometimes, I even think it’s better than sex. LOL but don’t tell my bf that. Smirk.

5) Reading - All kinds, of course - but lately,  I just love reading about the same two idiots falling in love. How will X and Y get together this time? - I wonder as I start a brand new fic. There is a certain kind of spark that ignites when I settle into a good story about my two favorite characters that is fucking unparalleled. And people who don’t get fan fic will never understand that and it makes me sad for them, in a way. But god! Finding a good fic that hits all your buttons and puts a big dopey grin on your face?! True joy. And what a gift it is, truly.

I tag: @katherinewilliams221b, and @thetruthinesswillsetyoufree and @readysetjo 

#five things that make you happy #personal

[arklayraven]

I checked out the drama on twitter and the whole thing is blown out of proportion. That person only left one comment on the artist's post and then also apologized for any misunderstanding. I personally see the relationship between Asmodeus and Solomon as abusive after the screenshots you posted. It's not queerphobic to not want to see abusive relationships and I think this kind of representation does more harm than good.

God I really wish I could ignore this but can't...I hope I get my words out right here because lol feeling emotions high rn.

Blown out of proportion? The person literally is queerphobic clearly and transphobic at that too by the looks of things.

I'm keeping this person's identity hidden because I have some kindness still even in such situations...but how can you see this as not a issue? Take note as well, these are AFTER the apology they gave to the artist...

They say 'differing opinions' but what they are clearly showing is just pure queerphobia at best here.

Also, if you have a issue with someone's art. ship art or not. DON'T. COMMENT. ON. IT.

Keep it to yourself, or post your personal opinion on your separate post. Don't respond with negative comments over anyones art.

Also their apology is pointless to me at this point if this is how they responded afterwards.

As well about the whole damn Solomon and Asmo situation. Yes, their relationship isn't perfect. god I still don't support them as a ship personally myself much. Because of my clear reasons I stated many times before.

But I ain't gonna personally go after people over it and post shitty comments on their arts or fics involving them as a ship. Yes, you, and anyone, is allowed to dislike them as a pairing. But actions like, like this person has shown, when it comes to a damn ship, one that is very queer. Is just not excusable, even if you personally don't like the ship. Just blacklist, block, ignore and move on. Simple as that.

Also...God I've seen this talk many times over.

Not every display of queer relationships in fiction or media is gonna be perfect or has to be. Any relationship in such media can often come with their own issues and problems in story telling. But to say every display of queer pairing has to be just pure and good to be counted as 'good' rep. Really isn't okay? Like yes we'll like to see some queer relationships in media be shown in positive lights only. But some of us also like some dark, complicated and just fucked up shit too. Because that's the beauty of art and fiction. It can be either bright and sunny, or dark and stormy in story telling.

This of course, won't be for everyone, no duh, but its good to have different interpretations and options to explore and see. Freedom of creativity pretty much. Even if not everyone will be in agreement of some of those expressions of creativity.

Also its kinda harmful to want to see just queer relationships in media in just a pure light. I get what you're aiming for, but that's like saying characters like Deadpool, Loki, Harley Quinn, the whole damn cast of WWDITS, etc. Are all not valid queer rep in media because they are all complicated or show problematic stuff compared to the just happy bubbly queer rep pairings in other media.

All queer rep is valid rep. No matter if they have problematic stuff or not.

And even tho Asmo and Solomon relationship, if you see it as a pairing, isn't the perfect display of positive queer relationship rep in OM. It's still damn valid and important to a lot of people in the fandom and community.

For out of all the brothers, Asmo, is by far, the only on to truly show his queerness more openly than others. Yet because its not a perfect interpretation to some people when it comes with Solomon...Some want to see that now gone. And honestly...that's not okay. It's just censorship at that point and I'm against that shit.

Their relationship can be improved and fixed in time, I want to cling to hope it will in time. As og OM has apparently shown they did improve things between them in time...

So I hope in NB it turns out the same, even tho the writers clearly messed things up with writing from canon past information to present...

But no matter if its still a messy display for relationship. This is a rep that shouldn't be thrown away or seen as not valid, just because it doesn't fit some peoples personal likes and standards.

#;answered

[lunapwrites]

three knocks: 2 3 11 15 😍

Ahhh, three knocks my beloved <3 <3

2: What scene did I first put down?

So I did in fact write this in order, no jumping around. So the first scene -- Tonks describing the brutal murder of Lucius Malfoy -- was the first one I wrote. :D

3: What's my favorite line of narration?

EASY!

The escape itself was a blur of moonwashed stone and screams. She remembered the copper-sweet tang of blood on the air, the sucking rasp and rattle of dark cloaks, the icy wisps of her breath as she whispered curses into the dark. She remembered the guards falling before them, thinking these are my brothers. She remembered fangs flashing against Black fur, thinking this is my blood and blood will out.

Like I wrote that and I was like I HAVE PEAKED. I WILL NEVER WRITE ANYTHING THIS GOOD AGAIN. (I know, logically, I can only improve BUT it felt that way at the time lol.) I still read this line though and I just get so fucking hyped.

(My next favorite is probably the bit where Remus makes bad jokes about mauling people and immediately calls himself out like "ah, too soon." Like YES TOO SOON MY DUDE but also no babygirl, you have never done anything wrong in your life ever.)

11: What do I like the best about this fic?

LILY. Good god. I love the way I wrote her here. She is soooooo !!!! UGH! Like I know that I tell people that her entire cadence and way of speaking in this fic is based off of Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs version) but like... just this polite, restrained malice. This logical madness. She is a tiger in the grass with blood in her teeth. She is beautiful and terrifying and she knows it. I fucking adore her.

15: What did I learn from writing this fic?

Honestly it's that the limit doesn't exist. Have thought, put it on paper. Go chewing-drywall levels of insane over it. SOMEONE else will love it, I promise. Don't get caught up in the "well I don't know if people would--" no. Don't worry about people. Don't worry about getting it perfect. Once you let worry beta for you, you've started digging your fic's grave. Just write what makes the brain go brrrrrrr. The rest will follow.

Disclaimer that I do often need to take my own advice here lol

Thanks for the ask!

From this ask game! Inbox is always open. :)

#ask games #fanfiction ask game #responses #three knocks #lily evans #nymphadora tonks #hp

[doublesidedgemini]

11/15

It was a good day :) not too bad, at least. I went to the barn and had a great ride with my horse! It wasn’t perfect, but we’re making improvements and that’s what counts. Someone who’s never seen her before said she’s beautiful and has beautiful musculature and I was like YES!!!!!! punching the air!!!!

Literally I’ve been trying to get her to gain weight + build muscle since I first started working with her three years ago!! It’s always going to be a lifelong process with her, she’s always going to be in a state of “physical rehab” due to various medical issues, but I’m just so happy we’ve made it this far :,) I honestly can’t believe it. She looks and moves like a completely different horse now. I’ve legit been through hell and back with this horse and seeing her improve so much??? Literally over the moon.

Idk where this burst of energy has come from but I’ll take it <3

tw: wiaiad, cal log, ed after the cut

Breakfast

Celsius, dragonfruit like — 10

lightly salted rice cake w/ 1/2 tbsp of vegan butter & seasoned w/ tajin — 85 (Ummmmm let me tell you the gods fucking sang as soon as I tasted that butter, oh my god…. I think my body must really be craving fat 😅)

chocolate vegan protein shake — 110

Lunch

1 serving of nasoya vegan dumplings w/ one packet of soy sauce — 155 (these dumplings are SO good btw)

FOUR fucking double stuf Oreos lol rip — 280

Dinner

1 more serving of those vegan dumplings, but this time I put them in a mug of vegetable broth and made makeshift soup dumplings hehe — 165

lightly salted rice cake w/ 1/2 tbsp plant based butter and seasoned w/ tajin — 85 (see I told you I was having fat cravings lol. I want this again sooo bad. I guess today is the day of repeating food 😂)

2 tbsps white rice — 26

1/3 cup vegan locro — 62

Snacks

caramel rice cake w/ 1 tbsp peanut butter & 1 tbsp jelly — 190

1/2 peppermint stick — 25

ANOTHER Oreo Lmfao — 70

Exercise

100 squats — -32

Walked up and down stairs for 10 min — -86

Horse grooming + riding for today — -496

Total: 667! 😱

Honestly I’m shocked by this! I guess I must have gotten my impulses back under control since vacation last month :) I want to be strict + disciplined so that I can eat around thanksgiving w/o being a complete weirdo. And there are things I want to cook and bake!!! So I want to try to keep things as low as possible, but days I go to the barn I’m letting myself eat more. And if I have a super strong craving and I’m fighting with myself over it for several minutes… fuck it I’m just eating it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#gem’s personal ana diary #tw ana thoughts #tw ana diary #disordered eating thoughts #wiaiad #high cal restriction #cal log #anor3x14 #ana trigger #tw ed diet

[bbugyu]

omg it’s totally fine, luv! answer the asks whenever you want~ hope you’re getting some rest too, bff!

HAHAHA i have so much on my list as well! i just finished watching he’s just not that into you and i loved the film sm it tugged at my heartstrings i can’t even explainsjdhskdjdk 😭 and oh i finished ld+r yesterday and watched a lot of films and can i say i’m so glad i finally have time now T___T alsoooo do you have film or series recos??? would love to start another show!

shua best bf ever we love to see it 🤌

btw i wanna share this with you… my ults are 95z now!!!! i hate them and their talented ass and their pretty faces istg </333 cheol being a new addition to my bias line just proves that there should be someone to balance the jihan dynamics 🤕

- 🐰 <3

congratulations on ulting 95z!!!! ur taste is... *mwah* yk like truly they are so deserving.

omg!!! i have soooo many recs since we are talking abt tv i'll stick to shows i've been enjoying lately!!! any show or movie i mention in any of my fics is immediately a rec, btw. i'm always trying to reference things i love on my writing LOL

the last series i watched was only murders in the building (on hulu), which i had heard a lot about and had heard from a few people that it was pretty fun, but this show was so VASTLY undersold to me. i literally put it on because my stepmom had bugged me about it recently and i was like, "it's steve martin, martin short, and selena gomez. like, worst case scenario, it makes me laugh sometimes." YALL. THIS FUCKING SHOW. this show is so INSANELY well directed, so perfectly cast, and i have literally gasped and slapped the space bar at reveals (guest star reveals, too, bc WHAT THE FUCK **** ***** IS HIS STUNT DOUBLE??). it's SO compelling, SO funny, and there is so much genuine chemistry in the main cast. i'm all caught up on season two, i can't believe i have to watch it week to week 😭😭 it's shaping up to be just as fantastic this season, too!!!!

i also recommend what we do in the shadows on fx!! the new season is about to start (streams on hulu i believe) and i am not lying when i say this is the funniest ensemble cast on television today. taika waititi is a fucking genius (we all know this) and has literally perfected my career trajectory dream (which supposedly means i still have time to do it too bc he was 30 when he wrote and directed for flight of the conchords... hmmm), and he is so deserving of the praise because he creates these morally gray annoyingly idiotic characters in these fantastical and absurd situations and makes you SIDE WITH THE EMPATHY LACKING VAMPIRE???? the characters are incredible the fashion is on point the gothic castle vibes always hit and then they are just like. in new york. GOD ITS SO FUNNY

on the reality front, trixie motel on discovery+!!! oh my god TRIXIE MOTELLLLLL i love this show so much i grew up watching food network and hgtv so i love a good home improvement show and this just takes that extremely heteronormative genre of reality television and. puts it in drag. like, its so gay, its so well put together and organized and the ROOM DESIGNS??? ARE SO FUCKING GOOOOOOD LIKE MY DREAM MANSION LOOKS LIKE THE TRIXIE MOTEL OKAYYYY yes im a gay architect lets move past it. the 60s space bombshell room really blew me away i loved i soooo much. so much.

another one of my absolute faves recently has been the world according to jeff goldblum on disney+!! it's a docuseries where jeff just pursues information from experts on weird niches that he finds interesting, like sneakerheads, or roller derby, or practical magic. such a feel good series, super informational about fringe culture, and accurately represents bipoc creators and influencers. it's soooo fun! and jeff is such a charming weirdo, i adore watching him talk about anything at all. he reminds me of my history loving story telling human rights protector gramps (probably bc they're both jewish and truly wonderful men).

#ask #🐰 anon #me ranting about shows HELP #personal

[bonesandthebees]

Haha I'm back! I hope I don't need a third part.

But yes besides all that, Greek mythology is love and I was so happy to see you picked Apollo as a name :'D

Hmm, what else. Tubbo and Ranboo as well were fantastic to read, I'm glad you wrote their emotions as actual reactions and not idealistic scenarios which most people couldn't actually cope with as easily. This applies to Wilbur, Tommy and everyone really, their actions and reactions aren't always perfect but it makes it that much more intriguing to read through and immersive.

Aaa I lowkey want to go reread this all over again and fall into clinic brainrot. Have I mentioned I write as well? I don't think my writing is nearly as polished though, so this was like, such a huge piece of "oh my god this is making me want to write" inspiration for me. Your writing is legitimately wonderful ahaha

Final thing, for now I think? Is that I love how you wove in the simple notes from the smp into the story as well, subtle but not really at the same time. They're like little nods to the characters and I love them. I love this.

Ok, now I sign off! (For now, I'll be back to annoy everyone soon enough)

Remember to hydrate and take care of yourself <3

- ❄️

dw snowflake anon the long messages are so fun to read through

i love taking inspo from greek mythology for names. i knew i didn't want tommy's name to be Theseus for this because it just didn't make sense thematically. I considered Asclepius given he's the god of medicine and all, but gonna be 100% honest, I struggle to read that name in my head and I didn't feel like giving tommy a difficult to pronounce name lmaooo so I figured Apollo fit just as well. not to mention, Apollo is also the god of the sun, which i felt just fit tommy better anyway

the conflict with tubbo and ranboo was one of my favorite things in clinic. I love love love writing arguments, it's so fun for me to bounce between the characters at rapid speed and having them shouting at each other and balancing how far they can go before i have to tone it back or risk permanent relationship damage. plus, stories are more interesting when they have conflict. if tubbo and ranboo were just magically okay and communicative what would the conflict be? it just wouldn't make for an interesting story. and wilbur as a character is so complicated, of course he made a lot of fucked up decisions and that's the fun part of his character. he's flawed in so many ways but it comes from a place of love. it also just adds more weight to the resolutions in the end because there was actual struggle between the characters. much more impactful imo

snowflake my dear don't feel you need to self depreciate by saying your writing isn't as 'polished' as mine. I've literally been writing on a near daily basis for roughly 7 years now. my writing skill is the result of a LOT of practice, because that's the main way you get better. your writing can 100% get to the point mine is at, it just takes time and effort. but don't knock where you're at now. you have to start somewhere, and all writing you do is going to help you improve. no matter how 'unpolished' it might seem, you're still building those skills and it will lead you to getting to a place you're very happy with. just focus on having fun with it!

i love sliding in little easter egg references to dsmp stuff, it's one of my favorite parts of writing fanfiction lol

ty so much for the kind words snowflake!!

#ask #snowflake anon #clinic