#(do they even count as crack vids at this point?)

[ghostlyarchaeologist]

Mini Leverage Crack Vid #20

(Sound on!)

More here

#leverage #parker #ghostly's mini leverage crack vids #and it's a clash of the decades as a tiktok trend becomes a crack vid #(do they even count as crack vids at this point?) #(who cares about definitions i'm still gonna make them! 😆)

[just-some-random-blogger]

AHHHH

Can I request a Matt smith x reader where in real life theyre married and in the show theyre hot sibling lovers 🥵🥵 anyways 👀 theyre doing a bunch of press junkets, interviews, games, etc. and its sooo fluffy☺️ and domestic☺️ and I just want to envision my life with Matt smith 😭

+ some star points if an interviewer asks about their 😏 scenes and they get really embarrassed but cute 🥰🥰😫😫😫☺️

I Can't Help It

Matt Smith x (ME PLS I WANTHIM) Actress!Reader

Summary: The tumblr girlies were absolutely wrecked when they found out their resident girlboss was dating their superwholock tumblr boy.

Word Count: 1k+

Warnings: Crackfic, i use y/n im sorry im not that strong, head empty only matt, a bunch of made up stuff because plot!, fluff, typos, etc.

A/N: NAH ANON YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW EXCITED I WAS WHEN I SAW THIS I WAS LIKE I GOTTA ZOOM THROUGH ALL MY REQS FOR THIS IASFHASFAS. i swear my anons and i share the same brain fr we all just want the same loser dont we PLSSSSSS [foams in the mouth] Also, idk if you've ever read any of my chris evans fics, but what you want me to do for matt is what i did for him & IM ABOUT TO HAVE A FIELD DAY IM ON CRACK HELLO ALSO ALSO, i get you probably meant they're targaryen sibling/lovers, cause otherwise ALFHKAFA MISS ME W THAT BS, but i decided on doing something different all together so lolol i hope you like it nonnie <3 idk what you feel about matt smith but im still going to tag you anyway holla Tagging: @pinksirensong what do you feel about matt smith HAHAHAHAAHHA

It all started with this tweet that was prompted during a brief interaction at a movie premiere:

@fannygurl007: yeah but matt smith and y/n interacted for 20 seconds and i want them to get married and have babies [clip attached]

being liked by Matt's mom.

Then all hell broke lose.

And hell hath no mercy.

It lead with intense investigations of:

@ihave100problems retweeted: AWFHASL:FHAH WHAT THE FUCK DID THEY WHISPER TO EACH OTHER?!?!? 👹👹👹 @thedoctorswife retweeted: IN FRONT OF MY SINGLE ASS?? THEY FLIRTED IN FRONT OF *MY* SINGLE ASS??? JAIL @mattsmithbithc retweeted: "Oh, I think you look so pretty ------- yeah, that's great -----" HELP WHAT ELSE DID SHE SAY @mattsmithbithc replied: I THINK SHE SAID SMTH ABOUT HIS SUIT BUT IDK WHAT SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP @tennantsmith1 retweeted: you really can't trust men look at the way he's looking at her. i bet it was love at first sight for him. was anything between us even real </3 @mmmyehs retweeted: what's that? my matt smith and y/n cutouts gon sleep outside? I HOPE YOU KEEP EACH OTHER WARM IN HELL @y/nloml666 retweeted: NAH NAH NAH BUT MY BISEXUAL ASS WANTS TO BE IN BETWEEN THAT SANDWHICH @datass00 replied: me watching that vid like [image attached below]

Then these things popped up on youtube:

proof matt smith and y/n have been dating all along 🤡🤡

Clip #1

I stick my hand in a jar and pull out a folded piece of paper. "Who's my celebrity crush," I read out the question, turning back to the camera, "I have long list," I refold the paper as I push it beneath my seat, "and the unfortunate king of that, currently, is Matt Smith."

*cut to a bunch of 🤡🤡🤡 and really loud background music*

One of the staff asks, off camera, "why unfortunate?"

"Well," I chuckle, crossing my arms, "if you know me, then you know when I like something so, so much, I end up hating it." I straighten up, "yeah, Matt Smith may or may not have been subjected to verbal abuse as of late."

I chuckle as I hear a few of the staff wheeze.

I raise a hand and cut through the air, "affectionately, affectionately."

Clip #2

There is an abrupt cut to a sound of a crowd cheering.

Matt leans in, scrunching his face as he brings the mic close to his lips, "sorry, love, what was that?"

*The clip is replayed twice and captioned [IM SORRY THE WAY HE SAID THAT WAS JUST SO HOT I HAD TO REPEAT IT]*

The crowd is gracious enough to quiet down, keeping their fangirling internal.

"Is there an actor or actress that you have not yet worked with but always wanted to?" the lucky fan asks her question again.

Matt hums, leaning back on his sofa chair, repeating the words for good measure. He pulls the mic away as he thinks, then brings it back, "you know what, I have been lucky enough to work with some amazing people," he starts, "but-"

The crowd cheers.

Matt smiles and releases a chuckle, waving the mic around, "but," he carefully says, "I have recently watched Vampire in the Locker for the first time."

The crowd cheers again.

"Yeah, and thought y/n was absolutely fabulous in it."

Someone in the crowd says loudly, "same!"

The crowd, along with Matt, laughs. He straightens up and points, "that person gets it!"

But what it really took was this Instagram post to destroy the internet:

@imthebesty/n: ok but you cant get mad a me, i was there during superwholock. at least one of us won!! ps, he's a horrible cook, i promise you don't want him. i took one for the team 😇

That paired with headlines like:

Y/N confirms relationship with Matt Smith on Instagram with hilarious caption

Matt Smith cooks horribly, according to girlfriend, Y/N, who confirmed rumors with Instagram post

"I took one for the team," Y/N says in Instagram post, referring to dating Matt Smith

Tumblr but all stayed sane:

winchester-pie: Are you normal, or are you losing your mind overthinking one of the superwholock girlies is secretly y/n 369,278 notes dont-talk3me: When I gaslight people, it's bad, when y/n gaslights people, it's taking one for the team? 16,586 notes uowbish: I'm gonna say it: I DONT CARE THAT YOU'RE DATING MATT SMITH YOU SHOULD BE DATING ME [image attatched] 99,345 notes sh3l0ck3D: thinking about how y/n once said that she wrote fanfiction that was popular online. i should have known it was superwholock, she unhinged as fuck. 836,084 y/nb00tyluv: OK but i genuinely think y/n and matt smith talked for 5 minutes then decided to date after that 74,670 notes prettyeyebrows: ok but tell me y/n doesn't look like the type to make memes like this [image attached below] 424,245 notes

The cherry on top was when Vogue magazine graced the world with this brilliant interview:

I introduce myself and turn to my side, smiling at the man next to me.

"I'm Matt, and today we-"

"Smith."

Matt turns to me, words going dry.

"You're Matt Smith," I correct, blinking at him.

Matt looks at me for a good moment then raises a hand between our faces, turning back to the camera, "and today, we're going to be-" he cuts himself off with a laugh when he hears me laughing.

He drops his hand and gives me a look before continuing, "we're going to be answering some questions for-"

Matt points to me so that I finish his sentence.

"Vogue magazine!" I say, making the man beside me clap his hands.

The most played part of that interview is this scene:

Matt is reading from a card, "if you could have something of the other's, what would it be?" He chucks the card away, turning to me just as I turn to him.

I mutter under my breath as I think, "something of the other's?"

Matt furrows pouts his lips out in thought.

A beat of silence passes.

We then simultaneously trail off as we both whisper, "like a baby."

I wheeze and lean into Matt, dying of laughter. He snorts and beams like a boy on Christmas, dropping his jaw low.

"No," I warn as I raise a finger through my chuckles, "behave."

Matt throws an arm around me as he lets out more deep laughs.

"The fact we both keep answering the same thing means me hang out too much."

He scoffs. "Clearly not enough though," Matt notes, making me glare at him and shake him off. He withdraws his arm, face still awfully pleased.

I give him a look, "your mother has been ingraining that ideation in your head too religiously."

"I mean," he grabs my hand. He looks at me for 3 whole seconds before sighing and saying, "you would make a great mother."

I purse my lips and sighing as well. I lean into him a bit as I softly admit, "and I think you would make a great father."

For a moment, the two of us look at each other.

I pull my hand away from him, moving to grab another card.

Here are a few of the most liked comments on that video:

Jason Stone: I have absolutely no idea who either of these people are and only watched this video because it autoplayed. Do I want them to get married and have babies though? Yes. Yes I do. 88.9k likes kpopinmybloodstream: matt the entire video:😍🥰😘 y/n the entire video: 😍🥰😘 me the entire video: 😍🥰😘 but single as fock 🤡🤡🤡 103k likes sowrr88: if i cant have what they have, i dont want it 94k likes

#matt smith #matt smith fanfic #matt smith fluff #matt smith crackfic #matt smith x reader #matt smith fanfiction #matt smith my nemesis #matt smith x you #matt smith x actress!reader #rpf fanfic #house of the dragon fanfic #daemon targaryen fanfic #im dead #dont wake me up #the delusion is real

[cupidsbower]

Debrief on the novel, The End of Happiness

A few days ago, I posted my Venom novel, The End of Happiness. It's been a pretty wild journey, so I wanted to decant it all from my brain. The EddieVenom BigBag came across my feed on Tumblr, right at the end of the sign up period in mid-March this year. The minimum word count was 10,000, and that seemed a bit of a stretch goal given all the real life stuff I had on, but doable. I had to make a quick decision, and so I kind of went -- I'm doing Health Stuff and it's getting me down, and I have that idea about the Symbiote Emperor kicking around, and it would be awesome to get some art! So I signed up, planning to write 10,000 words of silly space opera and get a bit of art, and finally explore the idea of the Symbiotes having names alluding to something other than murder and mayhem. Nice! I couldn't start writing straight away, as I had another project I needed to finish first -- The Star Trek story I wrote for Space Swap in April: When sorrows come. I'd already been writing that for a while, so I hammered out the end, and was kind of amazed it ended up being 6,000 words long. As soon as I posted it, I started work on Happiness, at last. The BigBang rule was that 80% of the work had to be completed, with an outline, by the check-in, in order to be assigned an artist. I managed to get around 8,000 words done, I think, and then put together the outline for the rest -- cool, cool, another 4 scenes, so it'll come in at 12,000 words. THAT'S FINE, I hammered out some more words and just squeaked by on the 80% rule. Phew. And then I put Happiness aside for a bit so I could made my VidUKon premiiere, Mind Fight. I needed a break from writing, and it was so worth it. I cackled the entire time I was making that vid. It still makes me laugh now. By the time I'd done that, I was put in contact with my artist, and I got so lucky, because ifer put their hand up for my story. Win!!!! That really put a spring in my step! I wrote another chunk of words off the back of my excitement for art, and realised I STILL had three of the four scenes in my outline to write. Hmmm. Maybe it was going to come in at 14,000 words. The project was starting to be a bit more than I'd planned on, but I could still do it. EVERYTHING WAS FINE. By this point it was June, and I had promised to run a mid-year Venom fest, so I put together Venom: Let There Be Chocolate, created the Ao3 community, set up the rules, advertised it a bit, etc etc.  And then realised - belatedly - that I needed to create something for my own fest - because the first year of a fest never has many entries. I cracked my knuckles and hammered out As the Asteroid Turns in about three weeks, which wasn't bad as it came in at 7,500 words. I'm super pleased with it too - it's another story I'd had in mind for a while and it was fun to get it written. I also used it to try out some of the techniques I wanted to use in Happiness, like Galactic Universal Sign Language, so even though it was a detour, I still felt like I was making progress. Through all of this, ifer was a trouper! Put up with my shenanigans and half written first draft with holes in it everywhere, and was full of enthusiasm for all the aliens. I hammered out the "turning point" scene so ifer could illustrate it -- the one with Eddie and Venom in the underground pool. I thought... Nearly done! and was so pleased with myself. LOL. Then I woke up in the middle of the night realising there was a scene missing, and went back and filled it in... and as a consequence realised that there was a whole B plot I needed to make the A plot work. FINE, EVERYTHING IS STILL UNDER CONTROL. Then I wrote the actual turning point scene -- the one between Eddie and Xan after the pool, which kind of came out of nowhere. My story-brain just does that sometimes and I've learned to go with it. It always makes the story better. ANYWAY, AT LEAST NOW I KNEW WHAT MY OWN STORY WAS ABOUT. Everything was FINE! Don't look at me like that! I was a little worried, to be fair. The draft was at 20,000 words and I still had 3 of the 4 scenes in my outline to write. But I figured things were properly on track now, and it would be a straight run to the end. And then. *internally screams* THEN... I realised I needed a C plot, to make the A and B plots work. Friends, at that point I was NOT FINE. The fic was officially out of control. It was not a fun little novella coming in at 10,000 words. It was a freaking full-blown novel. I'd be lucky if it came in at 30,000 words. I had birthed a monster, and poor ifer had done all that art, and I had to finish the fucking thing by the deadline because I could not let them down! I panicked a bit, read a bunch of Witcher fic to take my mind off things for a while, got sidetracked by my actual job and had to do a bunch of marking. And then realised the deadline was HORRIFYINGLY CLOSE. I was at around 28,000 words and still had two of the four scenes in my outline to write. I knuckled down and wrote 11,000 words in a week. NOTHING WAS FINE, EVERYTHING WAS TERRIBLE. But I had finally, at last, written all the scenes in my outline. Thank fuck for that. ifer swooped in and did the first pass beta and I submitted the darn thing for final check-in. For those of you paying attention, you'll realised there is still a pretty big discrepancy in my numbers. The actual word count of the novel is 46,000 words, not the 40,000 submitted for final check-in. Because, you see, I asked the wonderful maharetr to beta during the gap between submission and the posting deadline. This was a very good decision, as she looked at the final third - written in that whirlwind at the end - and immediately started whipping it into shape, which was sorely needed. The rough bits got smoothed, the jumps in logic were made sensible, the missing emotional beats were added. A few thousand words were added in the process. Great. Good. Things were once again fine. And then... I said, hey, maharetr, do you think there's a hole in this one place? Yes, maharetr agreed, there really was a hole where I had suspected there was a hole. Bugger fuck shit. I mean, no worries, 300 words would fill that hole. Piece of cake. LOLOLOLOLOL. The best part of a chapter and 3,000ish words later, the hole was finally filled, and the novel had gone up a rating from Mature to Explicit. Also, I had officially written some of the kinkiest sex of my entire fanfic career. A notable achievement to be sure. With that done, there was only one writing task left -- the epilogue wasn't quite right. The final changes to that were made on 6 October, literally the day before I had to post the fic. Thank you so much, maharetr, for holding my hand through that final terrible writing session. All the hugs in the world. It took me two days to get the post ready on the Ao3, with all the images, fake links, and other formatting. I was doing that in parallel with making final changes. I finished getting the draft ready at around 3am on the 7th October and pressed post. Then I collapsed into bed and slept like the dead. And here we are. Seven months later, a lot tireder, having written a 10,000 word novella in 46,000 words. FOR FUN. Don't forget that bit. I did it FOR FUN. It was a lot of work, but I'm super proud of my kinky romance-in-space novel. I know it's blowing my own trumpet, but my god it is really fricken good. You should definitely go read it. ;)

[If you’d prefer to talk over on Dreamwidth, this post is also there: https://cupidsbow.dreamwidth.org/467690.html]

#venom #the end of happiness #eddievenom bigbang #cupidsbow #ifer #artbyifer #meta #writing #fanfic #art

[nosleepwriting]

What WN means to me:

i watched it initially for Avatrice, ofc i did. one day during lockdown i randomly saw a crack vid of avatrice and decided to watch it. not even knowing if they end up together or if they kiss or if they become canon. i didnt watch the whole vid so i wont spoil everything, which was weird because ever since lexa, i dont watch shows without knowing that the sapphic couple would be together and happy.

did you know where i stopped? i stopped during the part where ava phased out of the wall, breathless and scared, and beatrice was there to catch her. maybe it was the way she looked, the way kristina's eyes shined as beatrice holding alba's ava in her hands that convinced me that yup these two are in love. or at least bea is. this isnt a crack ship. this is real.

so i watched s1. tbh, im one of the people who thought s1 was slow bec if im being rlly honest, i watched it for avatrice. but i wasnt expecting to love ava, that running on the beach scene loving life, alba's acting of laughing and crying and breathless under the stars with the sand below her and the ocean just in front, and watching THAT during the fucking pandemic ???? that saved me from a lot of dark thoughts swirling in my head. i wasnt expecting a family. a real found family that even when mary and lilith were fighting each other to death you can tell that there's love, there's history. there's sisterhood. i wasnt expecting that from a show with 'Warrior Nun' as a title. and not bec i thought it was silly but bec i thought it was one of those female-led show made for men.

long story short, i finished it. search tumblr for a bit for content, then twitter, then ao3, as one usually does and then nothing. i moved on, peacefully. even if that s1 cliffhanger was far from peaceful. bec i was sure there would be an s2 with that kind of ending. i went on with my life and continued to consume other media.

until october 2022. i didnt even knew they were filming s2. i saw the s2 trailer in yt randomly again. there they were. dancing. i was like how did these two go from fighting an angel?-jesus-like-incarnate in s1 to dancing casually in a bar?? i was scared at first, maybe this isnt the same show that i'll come back to bec lets be honest most s2 of a really good s1 most of a time is a let down. but then i saw the "your jealous" "that's absurd" part and i was like yup those two are in love and im going to watch this just so i can see how they do it.

for extra context (i know this is getting super long but i honestly dont care im doing this for me), im reviewing for the boards and getting invested in anything other than my studies would be really bad. i was catious with what media to consume because i need to focus on my studies. even so, i watched the final ep for context and carry the feeling before watching the first episode. the legendary fucking first episode. the hands behind teasing walk, the kiss cheek, the dance, the stare (i dont have to explain this, u know what im talking about) i replayed all of those moments 10 times bec WOW they weren't holding back.

then everything else. the little moments leading to the big ones were satisfying and so perfectly excuted that i cant even watch it with my girlfriend bec she gets mad that i keep repeating the scenes and slowing them down to take it all in. halfway through s2, i knew i was gonna watch it again. and i only really did that for 2 other shows (shera and the wilds s1, atla and tlok dont count bec i rewatch them periodically and not right after finishing) but u know what i didnt do to those other two that i did with warrior nun? i watched it a third time in a bigger screen just so i can see more. i watched in a 4th time with my girlfriend. i watched it a 5th time just so i can move on with my life and i watched it a 6th time because i missed them and i can't. i watched it a 7th time because i won't. and at this point i lost count at how much i rewatched the show. i would stream it during studying just so i could have them on screen and be inspired with finishing so i can watch them.

im just really heartbroken right now. with all this.

#warrior nun #avatrice #tired #words #rambling #really really fuck this life #i dont want the next #i wanna watch s1 and s2 again bec i miss them #but im done with netflix so #ill find a more non-legal way #i always do #fuck i wanna cry #but im beatrice-coded so what are feelings

[avissapiens]

How to be a Bro Ch.6: School

(ID: https://www.instagram.com/xandore/)

You would never believe it, but the Bro is the one who’s really cracked the code on this whole school thing, bro.

You’d think he’d be a burn out with that dumb frat-titude. I don’t even think he’s been to class sober once this whole semester. But no. The Bro actually figured out the thing that all of the fucking nerds getting straight A’s don’t seem to realize.

School isn’t for learning. Of course it’s not. That’d be fucking ridiculous. Who would ever actually learn in an environment like that. Tested and restricted and prodded like animals. It’s fucking lame! And besides, in this day and age, you can get all your education online. Watch some youtube vids and you’ll be fine bro, chill.

No, what school is really for is Networking, bro!

Bonding with your bros. Forging those lifelong connections that’ll ACTUALLY help you in life. Getting to know the who’s who of the next generation of leaders, businessmen, Doctors, Burn outs, etc. By the end of your time in college you should have a Bro connection in every industry, bro.

If you think about it, you already knew that. When was the last time you used Calculus or needed to know the meaning of FDR’s New deal?? Exactly, bro. But I bet you can’t even count the amount of time’s you’ve relied on a bro to do you a favor or hook you up with a job, or just make your life better.

And that is what a bro spends their time at school doing. They do it with such skill that they might as well get a degree in Broing it up. Pledge a frat. Party with your bros every night. Get chicks. Get dicks. Get some nerd to do your homework. Workout. Look good in class. BAM! Out in 4-5 years with a useless piece of paper and lifelong Brotherhood that’ll actually get you a job at their daddy’s company or some shit. Or maybe you’ll just go and be a laborer. Put those muscles to use bro. Who cares?

Point is that you spent your time in the hallowed halls of Academia wisely. Knocking up sluts, Knocking back brewski’s. And hosting frat parties every night. Hell maybe you’ll even become prez! Now that is something to put on a resume, bro.

For resources to help you embrace your Bro-hood check out these files(1, 2, 3). If you’d like to support the creation of files like the one in this story, or you’d like access to exclusive files and files earlier than the rest of the world, then please, Support me on Patreon, And go and follow me on Youtube for more files. Also be sure to Join me and my community on Discord. And check out my own Site (https://avissapiens.com/)

#how to #muscle #jock #dumb jock #bro #frat guy #frat bro #caption

[stargaze-issei]

— 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐤 𝐭𝐨𝐤 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐝 + 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐫-𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧 !

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭; karasuno and fukurodani react to their manager doing the body count/bodyody audio tik tok ! [insp by this tik tok]

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞; crack(?

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬; suggestive themes, maybe a little swearing i can't remember ajaksjq.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞; the trend it's to put pictures of all the people you've slept with, in case anyone doesn't know!!

karasuno !

-> it was a joke, it wasn’t supossed to get out of the thrid year managers gc.

-> the girls found it hilarious and was a good conversation topic for hours, discussing who you put or didn’t put.

-> they knew, of course, it was fake. you hadn’t slept with oikawa, KYOUTANI, BOKUTO, tendou, atsumu, TERUSHIMA and OSAMU.

-> it was SO obvious it was a joke for them that nobody felt the need to point it out.

-> they just said things like “the most quiet are the worst ones” “OMG DETAILS ABOUT THE TWINS!!” “did terushima yk,, made a good use of his percing” because they KNEW nothing was real.

-> until tanaka and sugawara asked kiyoko for her phone to watch some videos of the new play they were trying.

-> and misaki, from johzenji, sent a “forget about teru— 🤢 can’t even say it,, Y/N I WANNA HEAR ABOUT BOKUTO!!! ik man’s  p a c k i n g”

-> tanaka looks at suga and suga looks at tanaka and they’re like .......tf

-> suga’s finger “slips” and they see the other messages until finally they reach your video.

-> you’re there looking pretty as usual and above your head reads “seems like were showing our body counts with this sound? here it’s mine 🤪”

-> tanaka is about to say “it can be what we’re thinking” but when OIKAWA’S picture appears both their jaws hit the floor.

-> nishinoya sees them and ofc he wants to know what’s so shocking, so he gets closer.

-> he drags hinata too, and shoyo’s like “that’s the great king!! play it again!! play it again!!”

-> fyi: suga paused the video because wOW and they don’t know who’s left in your video.

-> sugawara looks straight in the eye at nishinoya, going “keep hinata, kageyama and yamaguchi away and bring the team” with the MOST SERIOUS EXPRESSION

-> noya is lowkey scared??? like wtf??? but does as he’s told bc suga seems super intense.

-> kiyoko and yachi left to fill the bottles and pick some needed implements from the club room, you had classes for a few more minutes, therefore, there was nobody to stop them.

-> once the rest of the team, including tsukishima because everyone seemed to have forgotten he was a first year too, is together, suga plays again the video, while the littlest ones watch from afar in curiosity.

-> the silence, you will never hear them in a more tense silence.

-> they read what’s your tiktok about, daichi’s eyes go O.O, asahi goes RED, nishinoya seemed to be ready to FIGHT THEM ALL, ennoshita awkwardly laughs, even tsukishima blushes a little.

-> then oikawa appears. EVEYRONE’S EYES ARE FULLY OPEN AND NOYA LET’S OUT A GROAN???

-> but when kyoutani shows up they’re in SO much shock they kinda forget oikawa before, and daichi whispers an “oh god”

-> then it’s BOKUTO’S TURN and tsukishima just stops functioning. asahi is static on his place contemplating, withouth being able to form a coherent thought.

-> suga highkey wants the tea.

-> tendou feels like a betray to asahi, tanaka and tsukishima. noya, just for a second, wonder what was that like.

-> ATSUMU AND OSAMU FUCKING MIYA AND THEY EXPLOTE.

-> THE EXPLOTE LIKE WHAT????? WAS IT AT THE SAME TIME???? Y/N?¡¡¡¿¿1

-> they aren’t ready for the cherry on the top at the end, a picture of terushima sticking his tongue out, sweaty after a match, SMOKING HOT, and it’s not a picture he posted to his social medias or anything.

-> it’s only suga, and daichi a little bit, who realize that if that picture isn’t public, then either he send it to you or YOU TOOK  IT.

-> that’s when you walk in the gym, just to say hi before going to change.

-> the first year are playing among each other and you are like ????

-> they don’t even notice you’re there so you go nearer to see what they’re watching. and you see the picture of tersuhima yukie, from fukurodani, once sent asking misaki WHY her kouhais where that hot. it was also the only picture you had of him and the one you used in you video the day before.

-> the phone in suga’s hands seems familiar and... that’s kiyoko’s

-> “Y/N” screams asahi when he sees  you and the rest looks like they saw a ghost.

-> a second of silence goes before everyone blows in questions and you just hear names between bambling, “OIKAWA MNASNANPGDF” “MANASKL BODY COUNT ASLKLAS” “MAD DOG!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

-> and daichi makes himself heard despite the screams.

-> “y/n, i know you’re 18 and capable of making your own decisions, but we have to talk about... physical relationships, with our rival teams”

-> kiyoko arrives and quickly puts two and two together and asks yachi to go check on the first years.

-> she looks at you and sees you like WHAT TF DO I DO and nods and say “you shouldn’t have gone through my phone, no matter how curious you are, sugawara-san” COLD AS ICE ISTG.

-> AND SHE CONTINUES “what who y/n does or doesn’t do on her free time is none of your business, all of you, if she decides to get together with anyone it’s just up to her. you should be ashamed of yourself, specially the third years. you weren’t just violating y/n’s privacy, but mine, kaori’s, yukie’s and misaki’s. it may have been a joke, or not, but it doesn’t give you the right. if you ever do something like this again, we will be talking with coach ukai and takeda sensei” SHE GRABS YOUR ARM, TURNS AROUND, CALLS YACHI AND YOU THREE LEAVE LIKE QUEENS????

-> once you’re in the club room, both you and kiyoko start laughing because the team was FROZE in place. not even daichi was so scary.

-> the team then apologizes to both and send an audio to the groupchat too, and never bring the subject uo again.

-> still, they all wonder everyday if you really did or not.

-> and of course, they get so defensive when they see any of the boys in the video it’s hilarious to you and the other managers.

— fukurodani !

-> damn yukie making up dares that always ended up bad for either you or kaori.

-> mostly you doe.

-> at a sleepover, she was like let’s make fake body count vids and who falls asleep first has to show them tomorrow at practice!!! it will be fun!!!

-> you accepted because you usually fell asleep after one of them did but that time it was like they gave you a sleeping pill because you fell like a rock after a few hours.

-> as to why you were there, the day after, about to go ask the team if you should post it.

-> you list consisted on kenma, kita, sakusa, daichi, and just for the fun of it, konoha.

-> the girls call konoha aside so he doesn't ruin the prank, and you proceed.

-> "hey guys, should i post this?? i’m not sure if i look good enough to be seen by the world” bokuto practically yells at you that you always look pretty before taking your phone from your hands.

-> “why don’t you ask yukie or kaori?” asks akaashi, that was a question you hand’t thought about and by pure luck, you were saved by bokuto yelling at the team to come and see what you’ve done.

-> konoha is about to head their way and yukie just grabs his arm like “no ❤️"

-> and nobody can contradict yukie’s no so he has no choice but to stay.

-> anyways

-> the team gather around bokuto, who is about to press play. at first it’s just your face, and everyone agree you look pretty.

-> but then they read “did anyone say body count? ;)” and they look at each other like ......what

-> washio leans to stop the video because he genuinely doesn’t know what body count is, sarukui explains it a little too loud, grinning, and washio goes "oh–"

-> thanks to sarukui’s explanation bokuto confirms his idea because one part of him did think it was how many people you’ve killed.

-> they press play again and kenma appears and bokuto just stares, doesn’t react.

-> akaashi’s eyes widened and he GASPS, washio can’t hide his disappointment mostly because why would you make this video and then show it to them.

-> when kita shows up bokuto lets out a surprised squeak, along with washio that’s just question your and his whole existences-

-> sarukui is smirking, his complete expression yells “way to go y/n!!!”

-> sakusa comes as a shock to every one of them, even sarukui loses the grin for a bit.

-> “how did you manage to...?” whispers akaashi, half amazed, half grossed.

-> bokuto then has to pause it for a little to keep his composure, he looks at your like WHY WOULD YOU MAKE ME GO THROUGH THIS

-> but when they resume it and daichi welcomes him he thinks it just can get any worse.

-> washio is like “isn’t that karasuno’s–?”

-> “HELL YEAH IT IS” SHOUTS SARUKUI AND THE GIRLS BEHIND YOU LAUGH SO HARD BECAUSE HE IS SO PROUD OF YOU.

-> the rest is like 🧍‍♂️ while sarukui is SO happy for you LMAO.

-> it’s at the end when no one smiles. konoha’s picture smiles at them and bokuto just stops the video to look at him, only a few meters away.

-> he looks at the picture and then at konoha and so on.

-> can’t get his mind around it????? lowkey no one can.

-> akaashi isn’t even blinking and his eyes are concerningly open, washio is regretting all his past choices that led to this moment.

-> sarukui death stares at konoha. no more fun sarukui, he crossed the line.

-> kaori and yukie are wheezing WHEEZING I SAY and konoha is so confused.

-> his teammates look like dogs about to attack but he hasn’t done anything to upset them?? has he??

-> like robots, akaashi and bokuto get up and walk towards konoha. a part of you tells you to protect him but... what are they going to do tho...

-> “you’re out of the team” THEY SAY AT THE SAME TIME AND ALL AND KONOHA GOES WHAT

-> your co-managers can’t even breath istg NO HELP

-> you then intervine trying to keep konoha in the team lmao “IT’S FAKE GUYS!! A PRANK!! KAORI!!!! YUKIE!!!! BACK ME UP!!! I’M KIDDING DON’T KICK KONOHA OUT”

-> akaashi partially believes you, but bokuto?? nope.

-> you planted the seed on his mind.

-> the whole team acts weird when they see guys from your vid and are looking for chances to bark at konoha.

-> “AKAASHI HAS TO STAND BETWEEN YOU TWO ALL THE TIME” that’s the new rule he set.

-> just to see them freak out, konoha sometimes flirts with you at practice ;)

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #karasuno hcs #fukurodani headcanons #karasuno headcanons #fukurodani hcs #haikyuu manager #manager reader #haikyuu crack #karasuno crack #fukurodani crack #– star's; originals! [❀]

[wxnholy]

dream a little dream of me [lee hoseok]

warnings: none, slight angst, fluff

pairing: wonho x f!reader

request: none

plot: you stay up late to finish some work and hoseok manages to lure you back to bed (includes some kisses and touches here n there, nothing major)

a/n: i was just imagining wonho from that vid on his channel about his full day of work and he looks like the most magnificent cuddler,,i just couldn't help myself y'all sorry !!

hoseok loved you like you would never even know. the man was obsessed with your smile, the way you walked in his arm and talked to other people, the way your lips parted prettily when he kissed you, and how adorable you looked all cuddled up next to him when it was time for bed.

together, you were known for being quite the sleepers. hoseok was lighter than you were, often getting woken up by even the slightest shift in the bed, hence why you tried your absolute hardest not to move. but he mostly handled that himself, slinging his hand around your thigh to drape it over his waist and burying his head in your chest because you smelled absolutely heaven sent.

but he valued his rest more than anything, often taking naps if time permitted it even if he wasn't tired and most importantly, teaching you how to take them with him.

you were a workaholic. you were never tame unless your work was finished correctly and on time, and always found yourself in distress if it wasn't complete. hoseok never understood that about you, despising it ever since you two first started dating because whenever he begged to see you, you were busy at the computer. and if you weren't there, you were rummaging through paperwork or checking your email.

enough to make him nervous for you.

but he accepted that that was the way it had to be because at the end of the day, his drive and yours worked perfectly together. and you knew what was too much and when to sit back and relax. it helped when he'd come behind you and softly rub your back and kiss your shoulders, asking if you'd like him to cook dinner, or force you to take breaks so that you could sit on the couch and watch tv with him. it was the littlest things that reassured you.

but sometimes, there was serious work that needed to get done.

hoseok was in charge of dinner tonight, not only because it was his turn but because you were busy at the computer on a case that wasn't anywhere near completed. your law firm tried it's absolute best to give you work that acted in your favor sometimes, granting you breaks to spare. yet there were also the torturous weeks of sitting up during the ridiculous hours of the morning because someone needed your help.

and they knew they could count on you because you never rested until your clients were absolutely satisfied. you were special that way. hoseok loved that about you. you were a no nonsense kind of woman.

but he could admit to being just a little worried about how long you were sitting in the same chair since the afternoon. it was nearly eight o' clock and the thought of eating alone for the sixth time that week kind of broke him, but he knew he'd get his time with you because you'd have to come to bed at some point or another.

the man took his time in preparing the dinner that you liked best; a pasta dish with vodka sauce and a red glass of wine.

you continued to work through the hypnotizing scent of garlic and cheeses, noticing the way that your stomach growled but too busy to get up and go check on your boyfriend. your knee shook and by now, your back was starting to ache like nobody's business, but the way you were concentrated at the screen seemed to have dimmed any ounces of pain.

"baby," hoseok was quick to appear at the doorway with concern written all over his face, receiving only the quietest hum from you as your eyes remained fixed on the bright monitor at your desk. the man moved further into the office and caught how your eyebrows furrowed in concentration, typing like a mad woman before leaning against the edge of the desk to watch you.

you were still so beautiful to him.

even in the plain cotton of your shorts and a shirt, you had him hooked, and he thought it was a shame your firm had to be so hard on you. he missed you in more ways than one. by this time, the workload was consuming you, and yet he wanted you all to himself—lips clashed and all.

at the realization that you wouldn't stop your job for him, he grabbed your chin, forcing your eyes to his and seeming quite annoyed. "give me one good reason why i shouldn't put your boss six feet under the ground," you quickly smiled at him and pushed his hand away gently. "it isn't his fault, my love," you sounded exhausted, "this is my job," he let out a huff, clearly fed up with that excuse at this point even if he couldn't understand it.

yet he had it so much easier in comparison to you. he would go to work, come home, and have the rest of the day to himself. probably checking his email once or twice if he really, really felt like it. but the two of you were different. your jobs were different. and you would be lying if you claimed that you weren't at all jealous of the fact that he could come home and do whatever he wanted. but that was nothing to hold against him.

"yeah," hoseok muttered lowly, the dark look on his face telling you that he wasn't believing you or pleased with your state in the slightest. so you decided to prove it, finally standing from your office chair and grabbing him by the neck to pull him into a lengthy kiss that froze him. but he sunk into you as quickly as he regained his sense.

you had nearly forgotten how good his lips tasted after all this time, actually feeling relief from all the exhaustion and tension pent up in your little body. his arms wrapped around you in seconds, his warm, ready tongue meeting with yours as he locked your lips together for a second time.

you couldn't help smiling at him, sensing how needy he was feeling by the way he pulled your hips against him and sighed like he'd finally got what he wanted. but of course, he wanted more, growing disappointed the moment you pulled away, still holding him like a baby and watching him frown from the sudden lack of lip to lip contact. that twitch in his pants was slowly starting to bother him and what you granted was nothing less than a tease.

"this isn't fair," he muttered, dropping his head into the crook of your neck as you kissed his head gently.

"it's nothing we're not used to," the sigh he released just made you hold him tighter, "just give me a few more hours, hoseok. i'll come to bed with you, i promise. but let me work just a little bit more. trust me when i say that i'm almost done."

"but you're exhausted, y/n, i can tell," he countered before you kissed him again, smiling even though he was right. you did want to shut your eyes and fall into him. you did want to take his hand and follow him back into the kitchen to spend the rest of the night at his side and just be done. but you were strong. strong enough to say no even if your body was screaming otherwise.

"i'll be fine," you whispered beside his ear, your voice delicate and almost broken. but he trusted you enough to let you go—that you wouldn't work yourself to death because you had never, ever lied to him.

the grip around your body loosened as he straightened up and gave you a short nod, aiming not to waste any more of your time. he glanced at your full lips once more before brushing past your side to finish dinner, only to feel your cold hand taking his wrist on his way out. the touch made him spin around to look at you. but in truth, you just wanted to admire him. you blushed, realizing you deserved none of him.

"i love you," your hand tightened around his wrist as you spoke, basking in how relieved he looked as he took in the words; his favorite out of your mouth, even more than his own name.

"i love you more, y/n," you blushed again, pecking his lips sweetly before reluctantly slipping your hand from his wrist to return to your desk. the man's eyes remained on you for a while though, probably imagining how wonderful it would be if he could just take hold of something and make time stop just to kiss you again.

but he retreated, returning with a big plate of food and some wine to give you the energy to go on. you smiled beautifully at him as he tipped your head back to kiss you again, settling into the couch in the living room to catch up on all the shows you two couldn't watch together because you didn't have the time. he held a drink in his right hand, lightly circling the rim with his mind set on you and your lips, slowly feeling his body giving out as the night fell later and later.

the phone laying at his side read eleven o' clock at night, making it a full two hours since you two had last spoken to each other. he could see that you were still in the zone from when he came in to take your plate away earlier, asking about how much longer you'd be. but once again, you only promised that you'd be done soon.

so hoseok waited on you some more, fighting sleep to the best of his ability as midnight crept. he got another drink, and another, and another, until he realized that it was only making his exhaustion worse. to the point that staying awake felt practically impossible. so, he checked on you one more time, your eyes still glued to the screen though he didn't call for you this round. you weren't even paying attention to the time. he didn't need to guess to know that that was the truth.

but he didn't say anything.

he turned off all the lights in the house, made sure the doors were locked, washed the dishes, shut off the tv, and did everything either of you would've done on any normal night. though made sure to leave the light in your office on and the door open just a crack. he didn't tell you goodnight because that defeated the purpose. he couldn't fall asleep properly if you weren't beside him.

he attempted reading for a short while after showering and slipping some fresh sweats on but ended up drifting off within the first few chapters, comfortable as always in the bedsheets yet cold—which hoseok attributed to your absence, the lack of presence inevitably waking him up just a few hours later. the lamp at the bedside was still shining, and the clock below it read a bright 2:34 in the morning.

he grew pissed.

he tore the blanket off and stood from the bed, feeling even more cold air engulfing his body as he made his way over to your office for what felt like the millionth time that night. except now, he wasn't taking no for an answer. not anymore. this obviously wasn't healthy for you and if he could, he'd throw you over his shoulder and force you to come back to bed with him.

except the consequences would be movement. tons and tons of it because you'd be restless, thinking of all the outcomes of what a heap of incomplete work could do to you. and those were by far, the worst nights of his life. if you were coming to bed, you'd have to get there yourself. and hoseok hoped that the fuming expression on his face was enough to scare you into submission. normally, it's what did the trick.

hoseok quietly pushed the door back and saw you in the same exact position as before, slowly reaching over to flick off the light switch and almost sending you into a heart attack. your throat grew dry knowing the man was standing in the doorway probably furious with you because you had completely disregarded his wishes. "bedtime," he stated firmly as you sat in the dark, the monitor glowing against your skin and making you chew at your lip.

you glanced at the time in the corner and noticed the horrid hour, sulking in your chair and just for a second, thought of opening your mouth to speak. "i'm not asking this time," his statement had you quiet again. yet for some reason, you wouldn't listen. "i'm so close to being done," you whispered, practically pleading even if your eyes were burning and drained, probably even red.

"i don't care."

"hoseok–"

"i'm not repeating myself, y/n,"

you whimpered at how sore your joints were from sitting in your firm office chair all day, slowly dropping what you were doing and reluctantly pushing yourself away from the desk.

your boyfriend walked closer to you, whispering an apology against your ear and brushing a few strands of your hair away from your face to reveal the dark circles. "forgive me but i just can't handle seeing you like this," he carefully stated, kissing your head. "now go to our room. i'll be there in a second," you obeyed him this time without a second thought.

he straightened your work space and shut off your computer, saving whatever work you were trying to complete before finally feeling the pleasure of shutting the office door behind him, trailing back into the bedroom and doing the same. of course, you were a bit unsettled. not because of anything he did but because you hated when you couldn't finish something, understandably.

you tiredly glanced up at him from the bed, his cool skin soothing you instantly as he touched your face with the back of his fingers and kissed you. "tell me what you want," he continued to caress your cheek, hovering over your body and seeing how you beckoned towards the bathroom. and hoseok knew immediately what you meant.

he pecked your head again, gently laying you back against the sheets to go and get the bath ready for the both of you despite having already been clean. he dipped his hand in to make sure the water was warm enough for you and tested it over and over, using all your favorite soaps in order to make the bubbles. he delicately hoisted you into his strong arms and undressed you slowly, submerging you into the bath first before stripping and joining you in the water.

you fell into him in seconds, your nose pressed against the skin of his neck as he took his time in cleaning you off properly, dozing off quickly due to the warmth. he made sure to be especially gentle with the rag while kissing the crown of your head and listening to the way you breathed slow against his chest. like you were a child.

he kept mumbling apologies into your ear whenever he needed to move you, making his heart ache every time because whenever he rinsed you, you had no choice but to stay awake. to prevent you from getting cold, he wrapped you in a blanket and dried you promptly. he also allowed you to rest on the toilet and massaged the sorest parts of your body as he rubbed your favorite lavender lotion into your skin, kissing you even still.

after pulling one of his shirts over your head and helping you slip on some clean panties, you heard him whisper a 'you're all done' and carry you bridal style to the bed. the moment he finally set you down, it felt like your body sunk into a layer of clouds, growing a smile that hoseok could see as he got under the covers beside you. "thank you, hoseok," was all you could manage as you snuggled into his arms. though he began to hush you gently, wanting nothing more than for you to just sleep because you needed it.

"i love you so much," the last peck he landed to your temple almost had you in tears, bunching his shirt in your hands as you finally shut your eyes. more in love than you could say.

"i love you more, y/n," the lights went off and the rest after that was kind of a blur.

"dream about me," he muttered, smiling against your hair and feeling your heartbeat sync with his.

"always."

#wonho #monsta x #kpop #fluff #lee hoseok #minhyuk #kihyun #shownu #hyungwon #changkyun #jooheon #i love him #hes so precious

[biussworld]

Help

Here’s my first fic submission for the @bnhabookclub​ writers’ event! Click here if you’d like to apply for the server!

Also, just a quick lil’ message. This was a fic I whipped up after being stagnant for quite a while so everything’s pretty rusty and shit tbh but!!! I still kinda like it, because I do tend to gravitate towards light-hearted domestic stuff especially with my blasty Lord Baku.

I was inspired by a Bakugou cosplay vid on Tiktok but I couldn’t find the video anymore so,,, there’s that?

Lastly, huuuuge thanks to @lady-bakuhoe​ for beta reading! 

Relationships: Bakugou Katsuki x GN!Reader

Genre: Uh, fluff. Sort of crack-ish. 

Warnings: Slight cursing

Word Count: 919

Prompt #9 “Your lips are really warm” from the provisional license exam event.

"DAMN IT!"

Bakugou's loud voice hollered down the hallways of the supposedly quiet 1-A dorm, reaching even the lowest floor despite him being ways above. You and your classmates hanging out in the common area shared glances, silently nominating who's going up there to check on the class' resident gremlin. All eyes fell on Kirishima, the poor boy was just sipping on his juice carton as he raised both hands in the air in protest. Everyone let him off with a nod, which means...

It's gotta be you.

"No. No, I'm not going." You haphazardly dropped your plate onto the coffee table, shooting Iida an apologetic glance before walking off to the direction of your room.

"But you're the only one who could tame him, aside from Kirishima. And he's already said no, so... You really should do it!" Mina's cheery voice rang in your ears, her harsh grip on your arm making you wince in discomfort as she pulls you towards the elevator. You stare her down as she punches Bakugou’s floor number in, squinting hard when she waves teasingly as the elevator doors shut.

You sigh, loudly. Despite being dubbed the second-best Bakugou Tamer™️ in the class, you honestly have no idea how and why it even works on him. You've had your fair share of obnoxious younger relatives whom your aunts and uncles handed over to you during family reunions, so you did to him what you did to them. The first time was a gamble, but the moment Bakugou gave you a half-assed apology for being stupidly aggressive as fuck, that was when your class proudly designated you as his secret caretaker. Much to your resolve.

You knock on his door and call out to him, to which he screams back at you. "Just open the door, asshole."

It takes him a minute until he welcomes you in, and you stand in front of him as he sits on the edge of his bed. There was a short moment of silence before he finally speaks up, "I couldn't take a fucking shower because of this stupid band on my wrist." He lifts his left hand up to show you, and there it is. The villain of the night, the mastermind of all evil. The disheveled entry wristband from the hero convention he and Kirishima went to earlier today is clinging onto his wrist tight, despite being tinkered upon for minutes, you suppose.

"Why didn't you just-"

"Cut it off? No shit. Yeah, it's wrapped too tight and I'm sc- I don't want to cut my skin open, dumbass."

"You were going to say you were scared."

"No, I wasn't! Why are you here anyway?" He straightens up and shoves his palms threateningly towards your face, a signature move he pulls whenever he feels embarrassed. How cute.

"They sent me because we heard you scream. Let me help. Where are your scissors?" You waste no time questioning the agitated blonde and rummage through the stationery containers on his study desk for a pair of scissors but there was no avail. Somewhere in between your rather frantic search you heard him mumble under his breath, causing you to turn and look at him. "What was that?"

"I don't have scissors... I blew the last one to bits because it didn't cut properly." He explains, eyes looking at anywhere but you. You brought your fist over to your mouth to suppress a laugh. Does the mighty Lord Explosion Murder get triggered by blunt scissors? Cute.

You offer your hand out to him and he raises his eyebrows at you, so you bring it back to yourself and cross your arms over your chest. "I'm not helping you with that attitude."

"I didn't ask for it."

"But you need it, don't you?"

He pauses, eyes squinted and pissed and feisty directed towards your gorgeous shit-eating grin. He hates this. Hates you, and how you don't even need to do anything to have him on your feet simping for you. But you don't need to know that. Especially because he hates how he just admitted that in his head.

But he does need this wristband off his wrist, and he does want to look less like a fool.

"I need your help."

"Say it nicely~"

"Fuck- please."

The shit-eating grin on your face just got wider and he swears he felt the pits of his stomach fill with butterflies boiling hate. But he offers you his hand anyway, and you take it, and when you tell him you're gonna rip the wristband off his wrist it doesn't register in his head. Only when he's feeling your plump lips press against the skin on his forearm does he realize what had happened and just how painstakingly quick that was.

You lift your face and crumple the wristband in your hand while gently massaging his wrist with another. "See, that wasn't so bad, right?" You say to him, discarding the crumpled paper. He stares at you for a while, and you do too. You weren't sure if it's the poor lighting in his room or if you're seeing things, but there's a minute hint of red tinting the tips of his ears.

The silence and the staring is becoming awfully awkward and creepy, so you point to the door and motion walking to let him know that you're leaving. And as soon as you turn around, he speaks in the softest, most endearing way he's ever spoken.

"Your lips are really warm."

#bnhabookclub #bakugou katsuki #bakugou katsuki x reader #bnha imagines #bnha x reader #katsuki bakugou #katsuki bakugou x reader #bnha bakugou #sunbeam writes bakugou

[zeta-in-de-walls]

Ranboo, puffy, skeppy :D

(for the ask game)

Ranboo: Best actor on the SMP?

Uhhhh.... I can't really rank them. Especially as I don't want a lot of them regularly. My favourites are of course Wilbur and Tommy. I like how consistently they're in character even when doing more lighthearted streams. Tommy's stream today was in character for instance in spite of him mostly just talking to chat. I also really like how they both make great use of their facecams to great effects. Tommy conveying panic in the prison is brilliant, as is the way he uses music or the absence of it and he's done stuff like cracking his knuckles irl before planning to hit someone. Wilbur gets even more in character if anything, even using the meta such that he doesn't drop character even before he logs on or at any point in the stream and has been known to lie to chat frequently like claiming he was speechless from shock after Schlatt banished them. Plus how he was able to play Ghostbur competely differently. He's so good at his improv disalogue too. It's so compelling and immersive. Tommy's awesome as well, and he's actually improved a lot since I started watching, he's much better than he was during Pogtopia for instance. Their storylines are super interesting as well which helps. But yeah I like everyone and I really like the very natural feel of improv so I am not even like aware of a shaky performance because I'll always assume its in character or part of the experience.

Puffy: what part of being in the fandom makes you the happiest?

Oh, most of it I guess. I love the art and the gushing and the reactions to every bit of content. Love all the longer analysis posts, love the responses mine gets, love the positivity and appreciation. There's something really fun about watching a livestream and just watching things unfurl. I have a really good time in this fandom and I just love appreciating the Dream SMP and its CCs with all the other wonderful fans.

Skeppy: who was your favourite guest on the smp?

Drista, I think. Does she count as a guest at this point? xD If not then probably ninja. The stream itself wasn't entirely my thing but I still loved the experience and have really enjoyed Ninja and Tommy interacting and seeing both of them happy about it and collabing more in Tommy's mod vids.

Cheers!!!

#replies #heh quite long answers #i cannot resist gushing about wilbur and tommy #i tried to reign it in i swear #and its hard to choose one part of the fandom its the whole experience you know xD #cheers for the ask! #it was fun #tommy appreciation

[spaced0lphin]

Counting Stars

“Bailie is determined to count Jeff’s freckles.” - @virusq

This takes place post-TBMS, after the events of ME2 and before ME3.

The evening was blue with twilight. Humidity and the whine of cicadas spilled into the kitchen through the open patio door. Shepard was still out there, leaning on her arms and staring into the black pines. The opened letter on the table turned his stomach. An Alliance insignia showed through the envelope. In disgust, he turned it over face down. This was the thanks she got for spearheading the operation to save the known galaxy; a warning. The message was simple: Either show up in court voluntarily in a week, or be dragged there.

Joker's own eyes looked back at him, his image caught in the glass door. It felt weird, but also good to be out of Cerberus fatigues. Sometimes it seemed like his reflection looked a little wrong without them, but he remembered feeling like that after putting away his Alliance blues for the last time, too. 

A bizarre, almost musical croaking from outside caught his attention. It wasn't familiar - but Shepard, in all her stormy silence, didn't seem bothered by it. Dusk was settling fast. It was weird, this place. It was some little house on the far outskirts of the city Shepard grew up in. The warm, familiar rumble of the engine was traded in for wind in the trees, birdsong in the day, and whatever spooky noises the damn woods conjured up at night. Joker did not like the woods. Being so close to so many trees, all growing at once in strange, chaotic angles - it was unnatural. It and the nearby ocean smelled nice, though.

His Omnitool glowed, displaying the time. Two hours ago, she'd opened the mail and stormed outside. He picked up the offending letter and slid off the chair, putting the paper out of sight. This whole house in a familiar place thing was meant to be a break, a reminder for Shepard of what she was fighting for. Instead, all she'd found was this insult. He thought about hurling it in the garbage. It just wasn't fair.

The curious sound came again, this time from somewhere a little closer. Shepard hadn't moved an inch, nor noticed his approach. Not even the rap of his knuckle against the glass door, half-open to where she'd flung it a couple hours earlier could steal her focus.

He cleared his throat. "Hey," he said gently. "What was that sound just now?"

At the sound of his voice, she lifted her head as if snapped out of a spell. Her eyes were red and she sniffed. She'd been crying. A pang of guilt shot through his chest. He should have known. All this time he was sat twiddling his thumbs at the table like an idiot waiting for orders, she was out here, crying her eyes out with only the trees and mosquitoes for company. He slid the patio door closed behind him and leaned on the bannister with her.

"Uh, noise?" she asked, her voice thick. "Just now?"

"Yeah. It sounded like… uh." He screwed up his throat. "G-Ghauck," he tried. She recoiled, making such a face at the awful sound coming out of him he couldn't help but laugh. To his relief, she cracked a small smile, too. "No, no, wait, wait, hold on…" He did his best mimicry of the odd call. "Ghaaaawk. Like that."

"That's a raven," she answered, wiping at her eyes. "I think your first try was maybe a raven getting eaten by something."

"Heh. Maybe, I mean I don't know what's out there in… in that," he said, gesturing to the deep blackness in front of them. The little yellow light covered in bouncing moths could only do so much to illuminate even the first layer of branches. "It's so much worse than space," he grumbled. "At least you can see in space. Here there's things. So many things, and they all run and swim and bite, and… fly." He paused. Shepard wasn't looking at him - but up, at the sky. She tapped her Omnitool briefly, then all the lights went out.

They waited for their eyes to adjust. Stars separated out from the blueish darkness above. They looked so different beneath miles of atmosphere. Little swirling black dots blotted a couple of them out in patterns as tons of bugs did their crazy dance high above.

"You've never heard a raven before?" she asked with another sniffle, the sound a little loud in the darkness. He thought about her voice, and all the times he'd heard her be strong. In the course of everything, she’d yelled, commanded, screamed for her life, even laughed in the face of death. But never, never ever once that he knew of, had she actually cried.

"No, I guess not," he said. In the gloom, Shepard's shape started to materialise. She had her face tipped up towards the half moon, eyes closed against its light. He wondered at what she must be thinking. He couldn't imagine why she hadn't ordered a shuttle to Vancouver five minutes ago. How seeing that letter waiting for her hadn't sent her direct to HQ to scream in their faces about their ignorance and injustice. His own rage about it boiled hot in the back of his mind like the surface of a star. It didn't take much to picture himself cracking a rib telling them where to shove their trial. How dare they threaten her after everything? Where were they all this time to demand accountability now? Suddenly, he understood why she had been staring into those dark trees.

As she let out long breath after long breath through her nose, it hit him like a ton of bricks. Shepard wasn't on a shuttle right now doing those things, because Shepard had run out of fight. She had nothing left. She had given them everything already, and still they wanted more. They wanted her freedom. He knew that feeling, and in answer to it his throat grew tight.

"Hey," he said, nudging her arm gently.

She opened her eyes. "I'm sorry, Jeff. You were saying. Did you need something?"

"…C'mere." He pulled her close, tucking her head to his chest. She was silent. Her back shuddered a little, so he enclosed her in his arms as best he could. He kissed and stroked her short clipped hair. She carried the scent of vanilla, the sea breeze and everything good about the galaxy.

Shepard broke like glass. The sound of her wordless sob made his throat knot up so bad it was almost hard to swallow. Everything she went through, he was right there with her. Physically in only a few cases, but always in her helmet. Every hard decision and breath held in hesitation was a memory he shared, too. His way of dealing with it all was not to think about it most of the time. Always, he tried to focus on the next thing, and to give her someplace else to be when she was with him. But as her tears seeped through onto his skin, he knew she didn’t have that luxury anymore. He wanted to tell her it was okay, except it wasn’t okay, not at all. He didn’t dare shush her, the last thing she needed was to be told to shove it all back down inside herself.

After a little while, it felt right to sway, like when he was held once himself, a long time ago. Eventually, her halting breaths steadied, and tears slowly stopped spreading the wet patch on his shirt. He lost track of how long they stayed like that. He would have stayed the whole night like that if he could, but his left thigh trembled. Always the weaker of the two, his left had more extensive work done to the weak bones, and the muscles fatigued quicker. Just balancing on one wasn't an option.

"Mm, yanno, I didn't realise the fact I never heard a raven before would upset you so much," he whispered in her ear as he rubbed at a knot between her shoulders. She shook again, and Joker's heart sank to the pit of his stomach. But a second or so later, her quiet laughter made him sigh with relief. "Yeah… Okay. Hey, I need to get off my feet."

Her fingers curled around his as she followed him back inside. There was some long couch thing in the obscenely picturesque living room, and that would do just fine. He moved several of the fifteen cushions people always fill couches up with onto the floor and eased himself down, gingerly putting pressure on the twitching muscle. She reached over and pressed at it too. He kept waiting for her to speak, to address what just happened somehow, but kneading the muscle in silence was all she would do. 

“Been a while since you shaved your head,” he said, running his fingers through the fine growth. “You growing it out?”

She smiled and scratched his chin pleasantly through his beard. “The reason I left flight school used to have a thing for long hair,” she said quietly. “I’ve kept it shaved ever since.” 

“Oh. Right.” He took a second to admire the half-inch of rich chestnut brown. “Hey, only grow it out if you want to. Y’know, luscious vid-star locks or not, doesn’t matter to me.”

The weight of her head lay against his shoulder. “I think it’s time.”

“Because that doesn’t sound ominous.”

She smiled softly. Even red eyed, pale-faced, and her face wet with tears, Shepard was always beautiful. Dabbing at her eyes again with the sleeve of her sweatshirt, she said, “I shaved it all off the same day I left flight school. It was… kind of a statement, back then.”

“Well. Whatever statement you’re making now, I’m listening,” he said. Her green eyes flicked from point to point, studying him. “Ah heh,” he added with a grin, “That sounded a lot less serious in my head. You know something I’ve always wanted to do, though?”

“What’s that?”

“This,” he said, and traced from her forehead down her cheek, as if tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

Her arms slid around him. She sniffled, then grinned wide, in that way she always did before saying something stupid. “You say you don’t mind my hairstyle choices, but I’d dump you if you shaved.”

He laughed. “Listen, I’d dump me if I shaved.” He gave her a gentle squeeze. “I don’t actually have this killer jawline, it’s all just sculpted hair. I look like a yahg under this.”

She kissed his cheek. “You know, I’d never seen you in actual sunlight before today.”

“O-kay…? You say that as if I look different?”

“No, but stark light shows details, and I noticed something I never did before,” she said as she took his arm into her lap. “You’re covered in all these light freckles. The light from the displays washes them out and I’ve only ever seen you in dim light.”

“Uh… huh,” he puzzled. “There was that time your leg was all busted up and I took you to a café.”

“Yeah, but even in the day, the Citadel looks very different from Earth. Anyways. It reminded me of something from when I was very little.” Shepard turned his hand over and began drawing ticklish little circles in his palm. “My grandmother was a pretty interesting woman, from what I remember. She used to tell me that freckles were a kind of map,” she explained, squinting down at his skin in the darkness of the room. “She said they are a star chart, and they show a snapshot of the universe where a person’s soul was born.”

Joker lay his head back. Shepard’s little piecemeal memories of her family were always interesting, but very often bittersweet. If it had been anyone else’s anecdote, he might have made some kind of crack about such a sentimental idea, but as she curled up to his side, he couldn’t bring himself to wreck it for her.

“Well, let’s think,” he said. “I got a billion of these, all over, so clearly I’m from somewhere near Sagittarius. What about you, though?” It was hard to see much, but her skin tone looked smooth as ever. “I don’t think you have very many.”

“No. Just a handful, here and there. I remember wishing for a million of them, just like she had.”

“Ugh, you’re gonna give me a cavity,” he groaned. “Little baby Bailie at like five years old asking her gramma how to grow stars on her or something. It belongs in a cartoon.”

“Hard to tell, but I think you’ve got about sixty-seven right here… I need better light.”

“You’re… counting them?”

“I am,” she said. “It could be fun.”

“You have a weird idea of fun,” he said, shaking his head. 

Her lips travelled up his arm, from his wrist to his shoulder. “Do I? I think our sensibilities might be closer than you think…” “Oh?” “I’ve been thinking.” “That usually ends in explosions somehow,” he said. She smiled softly. “I think... I want to spend these next six days finding out where you’re from.”

“How are you gonna do that by just counting ‘em?”

“Oh, Jeff. Don’t bring logic into this. Just go with it.”

“No I mean, wouldn’t you wanna cross-reference them with known star charts? I bet EDI could do that. Maybe she’d burn out a processor… Y’know, you might actually be right, that does sound kinda fun,” he said with a snicker.

“I don’t need to do that. I can use the star charts up here,” she said as she tapped her head. “See this little arrangement? Looks like the Five Sisters in the Aurean Expanse, kind of…”

“Wait, what? Really?” he asked. His forearm looked the same as it always did. Maybe there were five darker spots among them, but it was dubious at best.

“Oh, definitely,” she replied, never breaking his gaze as she kissed the spot.

“Pfft,” he said, before recognising the glint in her eye. “Oh. I mean, uh. Yeah, interesting. Y’know, with this first pass at it, maybe just take a look, and uh… mark anything you recognise? To look at. Again. Later.”

She moved fast when she needed a distraction. Her chilly fingers made him shiver in the best way as she slipped her hands up his shirt. He followed her lead and just lay back. Of all the stars to be counted, he figured he had a few lucky ones, himself.  

#shoker #shoker pairing #tbmsfic #bailieshepard #bailie shepard #jeff joker moreau #hurt comfort #fluff #romance #this one was really emotional to write #i really needed this

[britishchick09]

my little pony: a new generation livewatch

what’s even better than livewatches being back after 2 months? mlp g5 being here!!! i haven’t watched g4 since the midway point of season 6, but i’ve kept up with all the pony news on equestria daily. at first i wasn’t too excited about g5, but since more clips and info have come out, i’m pumped to get the party started! :D

the orchestra is beautiful! very disney :D

IZZY BALL!!!! :D

HOLY FRICK TWI??????? :O

YAAAAAS!!!!! :D

i bet this is the show sunny watched as a foal! :D

twilight: “we’re the guardians of friendship! with the power of our friendship we will...” pinkie: “spread love!” flutters: “give hugs :)” rarity: “FRY BRAINS!” this is so sailor mo- WAIT WHAT DID RARES SAY????

did this just turn into a pony.mov video? or propaganda?

aww they’re playing!! :D

i didn’t expect sprout to be here!

OMG HITCH DEFEND SUNNY GEEZ

sprout wants to play pegasus bbq WUT

sprout kicked the rainbow dash doll RUDE

phyllis: ”you’re brainwashing their minds!” argyle: “it’s called research, phillys. and by the way, i leave all the brainwashing to you!” OHHHH NOT YET DEAD DAD JUST ROASTED HER!!!! :D

sprout wants to ‘keep everypony in line’ when he’s sheriff BOI

aww sunny wants her dad to see the unicorns and pegasi with her! :’)

OMG THIS IS SO CUTE!!!!!! :D

not even 5 minutes in and there’s feels!

twilight is ‘as bright as the sun’! :D

besties! :D

SUNNY SAID ‘PEGASUSES’ AWWWW!!!!!! :D

beautiful! :D

argyle: “one day, we’ll figure it out... together :)” OMG FEELS :’(

OMG THEY SAID ‘HOOF TO HEART’!!!! :’(

argyle: “good night, my little pony :)” roll credits! :D

sunny to her mane 6 toys: “good night, friends.” OMG!!!! :’)

things have changed around here! :o

sunny’s hair is like anna’s bed head! :D

:(

argyle’s death is sadder than most disney parent deaths and it’s just implied! :(

awww sunny said ‘wish me luck!’ to her dad’s photo! :)

ooh she’s a skater! :D

and this song is pretty cool! :D

sprout’s still alive :/

GEEZ HE JUST STOLE SOMEPONY’S DRINK!!! >:(

izzy? :o

;)

yay! :D

OMG THAT LONG NOTE THO!!!! :o

hey it’s hitch! :D

he’s sheriff! :D

aww he’s a critter magnet! :D

hitch: “give me some space.” the critters: *move half an inch* lol! :D

aww sunny and him have a hoofshake! :D

oh sprout’s a deputy :/

sunny tries to sneak into a show every year! :o

;)

canterlogic guy: “got any questions?” random pony: “where are the smoothies?” guy: “can’t answer that one.” lol! :D

it’s the show with propaganda devices! :o

rip balloon guy :/

hitch: “yikes, that’ll be a lot of paperwork.” omg lol!

THIS ISN’T YOUR DAY SUNNY

sunny: “let’s lend a hoof-“ *machine locks her in* “...that’s not what i meant.” lol :D

sunny trying to speak her mind while being trapped in a device tho!

DID SUNNY JUST SAY ‘EAT MY AAAAAAASS?’ :O

phyllis: “how do you think we should solve this? with hugs and cupcakes?” crowd: *laughs* pinkie pie’s about to go into a rage with that one...

omg sunny broke too many laws to count! :o

yeah sunny’s right hitch could be a good pony influence! :D

hitch: “all that unity stuff was just a foal’s bedtime story made up by your dad.” and a best selling tv show for foals in our world! :)

aww poor sunny! :’(

sunny: “...i wish you were here dad.” SAME :(

omg running ponies! :o

IZZYY!!!!! :D

izzy: “is everypony playing hide and seek? i see you!” aww! :D

hitch: “your kid is safe now ma’am!” pony: “...this isn’t my kid!” lol! :D

izzy’s never seen the sea! :D

sunny: “earth ponies hate unicorns!” izzy: “really? that seems a bit harsh!” yeah it does!

aww izzy’s skipping! :D

oh no she was captured in a box! :o

SHE PRESSED THE RED BUTTON! :o

izzy: “bye! it was nice to meet you all!” aww :D

hitch: “to the lighthouse!” sprout: *locks himself in the box* “oh no, i appear to be trapped!” hitch: “you’ve got to be kidding me.” lol :D

a smol bean! :D

aww sunny’s fangirling! :D

:)

she has so many questions! :D

izzy’s a great balancer! :D

hitch: “you’re completely surrounded!” *he and sprout are the only ponies there* lol! :D

izzy: *sniff sniff sniiiiiiff* sunny: “what are you doing..?” izzy: “you don’t smell!” sunny: “thanks! ...wait what?” lol! :D

izzy’s so cute!!! :D

ooh izzy and sunny have a song! :D

besties! :D

this sounds so 80s! :D

pretty scenery! :D (and balloon guy in the background!)

aww!!! :D

don’t arrest sunny, hitch!

sprout has pizza! :o

unimpressed :/

THAT SMIRK THO

hitch wants sprout to ‘keep the peace’ while he’s gone... hans much?

HITCH HAS ABS AND A PAID OFF MORTGAGE???

phyllis called sprout ‘sugarcube’! :o

sprout a literally foal child :/

omg sunny and izzy are in trouble! :o

and they’re in az! :o

zipp fab af! :D

wait how is she flying without magic?

she sounds kind of like rainbow dash! :o

zipp: “don’t tell them you saw me.” izzy: “there’s no way we couuuld we don’t even know your naaaame!” lol! :D

cuties! :D

so many moods! :D

the guard collects sneakers?

:D :D

check out the sony, cbs and t-mobile parodies! :D

ooh a royal celebration! :o

news host: “an excursive vid from pipp!” a news anchor saying ‘VID’???

look at those emojis! :o

aww izzy saying pipp’s slogan! :D

the queen’s...

a fluff ball???

there’s FAB, FAB AF and... fab phone addict!

cutie pipp! :D

aww cutie izzy! :D

zipp’s like ‘no no!’ and izzy just wipes her smile away lol :D

queen haven sounds like rarity!

queen haven: “nopony must know they’re here!” pipp: *INSTANTLY LIVESTREAMS IT* BOI

the guard took sunny’s book! :o

sprout calls his mom ‘mommy’... :/

sprout: *flings open the door* citizens! *door close* “AHHH!!!” lol! :D

somepony: “we want a real sheriff!” same!

ew sprout has a song :/

WITH HEAVY METAL YO

and NAZI IMAGERY WTF

BE PREPAAAAARED!!!!!!

PIPP PERFUME AD???

wowza! :o

and it’s playing on a big tv in the jail room! 101 much??

more like room 202 wowza! :o

zipp is here! :D

sunny: “i’m sunny!” izzy: “and i’m izzy moooonbooow!” lol! :D

the unicorns losing their magic ‘changes things’! :o

zipp has the journal! :D

their smiles though! :D

aww it was sunny’s dad’s journal! :/

zipp recognizes the star! :o

here comes pipp!

pipp’s here ‘for the content’ BOI

only royals can fly? zipp doesn’t seem so sure about that...

yay zipp unlocked them! :D

eyyy! ;D

aww hitch is beloved! :D

hitch is such a detective! :D

cutie bunnies!!!!! :D

BELOVED!!!! :D

hitch LOOK BEHIND YOU AT THE AWESOME MUGS!!!!

hitch: *smirk* “gotcha ;)”

zipp: “watch your step!” sunny and izzy: *fall* lol! :D

zipp found maritime bay and bridlewood maps! :o

wonderbolts! :o

zipp’s been faking flying? :o

WIRES AND LIGHTING???

wheee!!!! :D

she’s so happy! :)

omg twilight! :o

sunny: “oh my stars!” oms! :o

there are crystals!

beautiful lighting! :D

izzy: “we’ve gotten, like, a bazillion crystals in bridlewood!” wowza! :o

queen haven sings her own version of the mlp theme in the shower! :o

zipp is a spy at a pasta store! :o

press: “princess zipp! are you wearing-“ she’s not wearing anything tho...

press 2: “where’s the bathroom?” lol! :D

ooh a crown swap! :o

zipp: “swapping the crown will be easy breezie!” breezies! :o

zipp is gonna be queen since she’s older!

lies = safety in modern equestria... :/

pipp sounds like a modern pop star!

oh no the doggie suspects something! :o

OMG HITCH! :o

pipp’s song sounds like a blackpink song now! :o

aww hitch is wiggling! :D

oh no the power flickered out! :o

i think pipp was lip syncing since her voice cut out a bit!

lol hitch is singing! :D

oh no the wires have been exposed! :o

save her zipp! zipp: *doesn’t save her sis* ...oh :/

izzy: ‘her mom is the queen!” hitch to zipp: “you’re a princess?” zipp: “oh so the sheriff just became a detective.” lol :D (and how does she know he’s a sheriff?)

QUEEN HAVEN’T BEEN ARRESTED FOR BEING A PHONY PONY BALONEY!!! :o

and they lost the crown? NOOO-

oh thanks pissed off pipp! :D

oh no the princesses are gonna be arrested! :o

pipp’s voice crack is so cute! :D

the mane 5 is here!!! :D

hitch: “but i’m a sheriiiiff!” but you’re a mr. whiny pants!

construction isn’t going well in maritime bay...

OMG SPROUT SOUNDS LIKE DARTH VADER WHYYY

oh he’s just sipping a soda :/

phyllis: “oh dear. somepony’s getting a big head.” yeah you think?

zipp and pipp aren’t going through a good time right now but at least the scenery is beautiful! :D

hitch lost his badge! :o

izzy: “if you ask me, that badge was creating an unhealthy power dynamic! *sings guitar music*” lol :D

omg! :o

sunny: “once we find the crystal, you’ll get your magic back, you’ll have your fans and you’ll put me in custody!” lol :D

izzy knocked down a tree and saved the day! :D

it’s him! :D

zipp: “need some backup, sherrif?” hitch: “i’ve got it!” *barely makes a spark with some twigs* lol :D

cuties! :D

zipp called hitch ‘dude’! :D

aww izzy doesn’t want to leave her friends :(

OMG IZZY FOUND SUNNY’S MESSAGE!!!! :D

aww ‘hoof to heart’ :’)

hitch wants to do his part! :D

hitch: “the unicorn forest sounds pretty magical!” the forest: “is dark and scary* lol!

izzy’s house is stunning! :D

aww she calls it ‘la villa izzy’! :D

what a cool house! :D

the music machine plays the mlp theme!! :D

woah! :o

pipp: “i so wish i had livestreamed that!” sigh... :/

izzy’s song!!! :D

cutie!! :D

this song is so catchy! :D

smiley gals!!!! :D

lol! :D

hitch tho! :D

izzy rap!! :D

epic! B)

‘if we fail we’ll go to prison’ is really a line in the song lol! :D

the scenery! :D

izzy: “crystals! crystals! cryyystals!” lol! :D

people are depressed af around here! :o

british foal: “yoooou said a bad word! bing bong bing bong!” lol how random! :D

why is mayo a bad word tho?

they’re doing to a crystal dealer!

rubik’s cube! :o (it was also on the sheriff’s desk in maritime bay!)

and that pony is named alphabittle!

alphabittle: “deep talk for a little pony.” sunny: “you’ll find i’m average height,” lol! :D

omg he wants a dance off! :o

pipp: “feel the rhythm take you over! you feeling it?” sunny: “i’m feeling it!” DO YOU FEEL IT NOW, MR. KRABS???

epic! :D

yay she won! :D

OMG NO SHE DOESN’T GET THE CRYSTAL???

OMG hitch just said mayo! :o

they escaped tho! :D

QUEEN HAVEN???

and hitch’s badge! :D

queen haven wants them to ‘spin the story’ BOI

oh no queen haven and alphabittle are fighting over the crystals! :o

alphabittle threatens to use his powers but he doesn’t have magic?

sunny: “stop! you don’t have magic!” random pony: “bing bong!” lol! :D

omg...

aww cuties! :D

aaaaand......

it doesn’t work :/

maybe because there needs to be an earth pony crystal or a twilight star?

aww poor sunny :(

she’s about to cry!!! :’(

:’(

hitch: “i guess this is goodbye... friends.” zipp: “better hurry... sheriff.” :’‘(

sunny didn’t fix the crooked photo of her dad!!! :(

no she put her mane 6 figures away!!! :(

circle??? :o

the lights!!!! :D

CIRCLE??? :O

!!!!!!!!!

maritime bay hasn’t been treated too kindly i see! :o

oh no evil fireworks! :o

everyone has the unicorn mind hats on! :o

sprout is being treated like royalty now GREEEEAAAAT

and there’s more nazi imagery with that big mural of him!

sprout: “citizens of-“ *mural of him falls* lol! :D

the citizens didn’t want to fight in the first place! :D

OMG HE HAS AN EVIL LAUGH NOOOO

OMG ROBOT???

even phyllis thinks this is overdone! same mommy!

yay they’re reunited! :D

queen haven: “we need to get home!” alphabittle: “before we’re all jinxed!” queen haven: “excuse me, do you see my mouth still a-talking?” lol! :D

queen haven called sprout a ‘big robot pony’ lol :D

they need to stop it with magic! :D

sprout: “OH NO YOU DON”T” sassy man!

aww zipp has hitch’s back! :D

OMG SPROUT CRACKED THE LIGHTHOUSE??? :o

omg pipp and izzy fell! :o

queen haven saved alphabittle! :D

phyllis: “sprout! let’s put the toy away!” sprout: “mom, i’m in the middle of something!” lol! :D

HE WAS ABOUT TO RUN HIS MOMMY OVER!!!! :o

OMG THE LIGHT HOUSE IS CRUMBLING!!!!

omg! :o

aaaand it didn’t work! :o

magic of friendship it’s your tur-

OMG THE CRYSTALS ARE FALLING!!!! :o

THE LIGHTHOUSE IS FALLIIIIING!!!!!! :o

:(

everyone’s still alive though!

sunny: “it’s not the crystals that need to be brought together...” it’s us?

“it’s us!” knew it!! :D

yay choose friendship and love! :D

aww queen haven fixed the picture!

and so did alphabittle!

and phyllis!!! :D

uh guys what’s that over there...?

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YAAAAS!!!!!! :D

SONIC RAINBOOM!!!! :o

magic is back!!!!!! :D

they can fly!!!! :D

sunny’s flying with the princesses! :D

the unicorns are back! :D

the pegasi’s wings have such a pretty glow! :D

beautiful sunny! ♥

alphabittle says ‘hi there buddy’ to a little foal! :D

sprout: “mommy, was i a good sheriff?” phyllis: “oh look a flying dog!” lol! :D

hitch: “you did it sunny.” sunny: “no... we did it... together!” yas!!! :D

the gang’s all here!!! :D

izzy: “now we never have to be apart!” yay!!! :D

aww they all did ‘hooves to hearts’! :D ♥♥♥♥♥

balloon guy is back! :D

balloon guy: “hey guys! what did i miss?” *turns around and sees the mane 5* *SCREAAAAM!!!!!* lol! :D

and that’s the end! :D

besides the end credits scene...

;)

so that was the mlp g5 movie! i loved it a lot more than i thought i would and it wasn’t kiddie like g3. it was a lot like g4! the connection between that and g5 is awesome! the characters were fun and the story was really interesting despite it being a typical hero’s journey. it reminded me so much of disney! i can’t wait to see what adventure sunny and her friends have in store! :D

#livewatch #i've loved most of what i've seen so far! #g5 let's gooo!!!! :D

[strawbewwysamurai]

ok soooo yknow weird yt recs at 4 am right?? and basically i got a whole load of fish spicies vids recommended to me n i watched them all soo how about some hcs about watching fish together w sanji, law and paulie ?? id think itd b quite lovely hah (ALSO NO PROBLEM UR SWEET TOO!! HAHAHA)

OH WHAT THE HECK THAT’S SUCH A CUTE REQUEST-- And with 3 of my top faves as well, oh boy thank you so much!!!! :D Hopefully I get this right and proper. but if not you’re free to req again ! <33

Lets see if any of these strike your fancy !

Sanji:

Fish nerd fish nerd--

I mean, he’s a chef of the high seas with a specialty of seafood, of course he is.

It does not matter if you are at an aquarium with this man or sitting on the edge of a pond, he will prolly know exactly what little fishy is swimming near you in the water and also knows a dozen different little facts about the species at hand.

He has a little pocketbook on species of fish in the area, so if he forgets anything, he can just flip through it and give you a little spiel from there.

Usually one of the facts he gives is a dish it would be good in, but it still counts, and it’s funny as hell to hear him spouting off a recipe description in between facts like it’s totally normal.

It becomes half of the fun- pointing out any fish you may see to ask if Sanji knows it’s species or any little facts about it, low-key waiting for the day he gives a confused expression and says no, he doesn’t know that particular fish!

The day has not come yet but it will someday, you hope. For no other reason than it’d be cute to see him flipping through his pocketbook to no avail and then watching it closely with you in wonder.

Also, he’s really big on little details. Quietly sits hugging his knees up to his chin on the bank and marvels about how that little fish’s scales sparkle rainbow-like in this particular lighting, or mumbles about how fluid the others’ tails move in the water with simple flicks and darts.

It also helps that he likes to bring along snacks for both you and the fish alike. Something that gets them practically swarming the water, and is plenty healthy for them to boot.

You could be sat there for hours and not get bored honestly. Between the pretty and relaxing fish, and nice conversation, Sanji’s really a joy to go watching fish with.

Law:

The man lives in a submarine. It's like going to an aquarium whenever it submerges and you peek out some of the larger windows.

Needless to say, watching fish with him is fun as all heck, especially once he comes out of his shell a bit more.

The Polar Tang could be stopped near a reef and he’ll pretend to be disinterested and like it’s something he’s used to, but the second a golden colored fish comes swimming near the window and you point out it looks like the submarine itself, he can’t help but crack a little smile.

He REALLY loves when tropical fish go by especially- The bright colors make him happy and he likes to look at their markings as close as he can through the clearer blue waters until they swim out of view.

He WILL find the strangest looking fish and deem it ‘you’, and you will have no say on this subject.

You may, however, find the next strangest fish, and deem it ‘him’, and he will no say on this subject.

This will proceed to go on for about twelve more fish until both parties are smugly grinning like idiots and also pretty much half-scaring the fish outside the window away in their loud but lighthearted banter and joking.

Between all the bright colors of fish through the clear blue water with sun shining down into the water, and the snarky big idiot making comments and starting fun back-and-forth, it’s a really fun thing to do together. Both silly to no end, and relaxing as heck somehow.

Paulie:

Whenever he has a lunch break at work, he takes that as an opportunity to go sit on the edge of the canal and watch fish while he eats. It became so much of a habit that even on days off, he likes to just chill and watch fish during lunch or having a snack. It’s even funner and relaxing with someone to share the time with, so there you go.

You will quickly find that he has affectionately named many of the fish, and can surprisingly spot a new or different one fairly easily since he’s seen them all every day, even if many are of the same species and look extremely alike. He can tell the difference.

He’ll point them all out too ! Calmly tells you their names, and a little fact about that fish.

“That’s Reginald. They won’t eat anything but pricey bread. That’s Talluhlah. She owns the canal pretty much, and won’t let you tell her otherwise. And that’s Jacka*s. He stole my sandwich once.”

If there’s a new fishy face in the water when watching with you, he’ll let you do the honors of giving them a name of your choosing. He’ll suggest ideas until you decide on something, and will from then on never call that fish anything different than what you named it.

He does not know anything about fish species or the actual types that swim by him whenever he’s eating lunch or watching fish with you, and he’s never had much of an interest in learning enough to make the names stick.

He does know, however, that he likes it when blue ones come by, since they blend in fairly well in the canal until they come closer to the surface. He thinks it’s funny how they ‘sneak up’ on the both of you and gets a handful of snickers out of it.

You know those little moments you experience and don’t think too much about in the moment, but think back on and remember it as nothing but vivid fun and happiness, even if it didn’t seem like much, even now? That’s what watching fish in Water 7 with Paulie feels like.

#one piece #op #one piece headcanons #trafalgar law #black leg sanji #paulie #peachywrites #I HOPE THIS IS SOMETHING YOULL LIKE YOU'RE VERY NICE #ALSO ITS 1 AM SO IF THERES ANY TYPOS PLEASE EXCUSE ME #ask #anonymous

[border-spam]

Maw

Troy inspects his latest body modification prior to a planned reveal to his followers in a horrific LetsFlay, and considers how heavy the price he’s paid to change his appearance may really be.

Part of my Leech Lord AU series, some OC mentions. Long post. TW - Terminal illness, body image / mental health issues, gore, violence, death

He hissed sharply inwards, then held the breath in his lungs. Futilely willing his heartbeat to calm as he began to mentally count down from 10 like the surgeon had taught him. Every session had been a little better than before, he’d get through it. Stay focused, stay calm, and count from Ten...

Nine… Same as he’d had to do twice a day for the last month, knuckles turning white as his grip tightened on the rim of the stone basin. Eight… Same seemingly endless 10 seconds he’d endured over and over. They would end, keep breathing. Seven… Eyes screwed tightly closed and brow furrowed as the burning pain shot through his gums and jaw. Six… Slowly exhaling through his nose as the fire traveled down his throat and into the root of his tongue.  Five… The surgeon had said this would take weeks, not a month. Four… Lower lip trembling as the pain faded into a throb, faster than last time, good. Three… He’d known it would need this care. He’d researched. He’d known. No regrets now. Two… He’d just overestimated how fast he would heal, that’s all. It was major surgery. It would be worth it in the end. One … It would be worth it.

It would be worth the pain.

Letting his head drop forward as he shuddered in a slow breath, Troy slowly opened his watery eyes and took in his reflection in the mirror he faced, softly illuminating him in the dark comfort of his ship’s washroom.

He looked haggard. Cool blue eyes bloodshot and beginning to spill over with the tears he’d held back as the pain subsided, normally rich sepia skin faded to a sickly pallor and glistening with sweat. Some king he was.

“F-fuck..” He sputtered, watching in disgusted fascination as the antiseptic wash gushed over his lips and into the sink under him, leaving strings of blood tinged saliva trailing under his chin. Deep crimson swirls mixing through the blue medical fluid as it splashed up the sides of the basin.

The reaction to the cleaning was a little better than last time, he thought with a sigh as he turned the faucet and watched the medical fluid swirl down the drain. It was healing, and he probably only had another week or so to go before it was fully functional, but shit. It hurt still. A lot.

Running a thumb gently over the swollen reddened seam in his lip, he decided to remind himself why he’d done this as he stared at the dribble of fresh blood it had leaked onto his finger.

Why he’d spent months researching, contacting body mod experts, surgeons, flaunting his name and infamy to reassure them that yes, he was serious. Yes, he had given this plenty of thought. Yes, he understood how major this would be. Yes, he appreciated how much of his jaw and tongue wouldn’t actually be him anymore. That things may not taste the way he remembered after. That his mouth would never be the same.

He had done it, because he didn’t like his mouth in the first place.

It was too soft. Too big, lips too full. It smiled too wide and drew the eye to his delicate cheekbones, he was so sick of being delicate. Troy had been delicate enough his entire childhood, he didn’t want to be as a man too. He wanted respect. He wanted power.

He’d never given it much thought before Pandora. Never really thought about how he looked at all. It had just never been something that required any attention. Why would either have them had even considered their appearances? How they looked had no affect on how well they scavenged, or helped his twin on the nights she was overwhelmed with the reality of her gifts, or change how Pop had acted around him..

It just had never mattered. They were them. They were each other. Why would they need to ever look different? How could it change anything?

He hadn’t cared till Pandora, till other people started to care. And comment. And they had commented plenty in those first few months he and his twin had spent trying to form what was now the planet consume behemoth known as the Children of the Vault. Tyreen had quickly been accepted after he’d designed her imposing outfit and she’d started styling her appearance, but he hadn’t been.

The tattoos had helped for a while, the gauges and piercings he got after too, but he’d had those years now, and he still wasn’t intimidating enough. He was still pitiful. That quiet, stammering, gut wrenchingly gentle voice in the back of his mind reminded him of that often enough on nights when he’d be unable to sleep. When he’d lay in bed staring at the dark ceiling of his bedchamber for hours, and feel his skin crawl while he pretended he couldn’t hear the whispers.

Their rapidly growing follower count had been plenty vocal about which of the twins was the more impressive. Which of the twins they mocked more. Which of the twins had fail collection echo vids of stumbling and looking sickly, and devoted fan forums offering pity and love for the clear underling.

He didn’t want pity. He didn’t want love. He wanted fear, so he changed it. He changed his face.

Troy Calypso is not Troy DeLeon. He does not make rash decisions and be hopeful for the best outcome, everything is planned, everything is schemed. A month out of public eye while he healed? That was fine. He preferred to not be in it that much recently anyway, not while he knew he looked soft…

That had changed now, he reminded himself, watching as his reflection slowly split its lips into a wide, vicious grin that didn’t quite reach its exhausted eyes.

His mouth was razor sharp now.

As the smile melted away, he let his jaw drop open, angling his head slowly from side to side to check the alignment with his skull. Perfect, so much better now that there wasn’t any swelling. Even and balanced, with no lingering stiffness like it had in the last week. If he didn’t know better, he’d think the seams that ran along the center of his chin and the width of his cheekbones were cosmetic, and man... he couldn’t wait to show the galaxy that they weren’t.

Bracing himself with a deep exhale, he lifted his arms, hooked his flesh fingers and prosthetic’s metal digits over the line of teeth on either side of his lower jaw, and snarled deeply as he pulled downwards. The sensation of this exercise had changed dramatically over the weeks. The agony of tearing apart the healing tissue had originally been so bad that the intensely powerful painkillers he’d been doped with for the first few days couldn’t mask it, but now it was more just.. strange. Like the tension of stretching a thick piece of elastic, but inside him. Muscles complained as they shifted unnaturally, despite weeks of training with them daily, but it didn’t hurt anymore. It just felt intimately wrong. Almost arousing in a way, and he noted with an amused snort that this could be a lot of fun in bed once healed up. Well, fun for him. Then again, he was all that ever mattered in that situation anyway. He stored it away as something else to look forward to after the reveal. Slowly easing the jaw downwards, he felt his upper lip curl into a smile as the latches on either side of his cheeks popped open, responding smoothly to the downwards movement on cue. No pain, no stiffness, an improvement at last. It really had been worth doing these exercises. Tilting his head back slowly to allow the jaw to distend fully downwards, he counted to three, a deep breath through his throat for each digit, and slowly… gently… began to pull outward.  The shuddering crack that ran through his jawbone as it disconnected at the front seam reverberated up though his skull just like last time he’d done this, and he winced at the sharp jolt of pain. Bad, but nothing unbearable. He’d been through far worse. It still wept blood as it split apart and stretched to either side, but it was clean, and healing, and it looked monstrous.

It was perfect.

Holding each part of his split mandible outwards, he let himself relax, focusing on the muscular movement needed to force the modified tongue out from the depths of his throat and to hang beneath the open maw. This had healed really quickly, he’d been honestly surprised, but the damage in his neck had taken time. The torn and reattached muscle at the connection to his original tongue’s root in his throat still burned and ached like a healing bruise as he forced the slithering length outwards to lol between the jaws, and he slowly removed his hands from them. Keeping the jaws open like this with just muscle control had been something he’d only managed a day ago, and the difference in strength already was incredible. He watched the undulating waves of the extended tongue as it coiled, drool rolling down its writhing length as the mandibles above it twitched with the effort of holding them open without any support. The modified row of secondary teeth hidden inside the line of his natural jaw bone were exactly how he’d wanted them, serrated fangs pointing inwards like barbs. They knit together into a solid plate and rested under his tongue when the mandible closed, but open like this? Beautiful. Terrifying. His mouth looked like a weapon. It looked like he could eat you alive. Let’s see them laugh at him now, let’s see them call him soft when he could crunch their bones between his fucking teeth.

Troy gargled a crackling laugh over the pooling drool in his throat, smile creasing his eyes in the mirror’s reflection as the light caught his distended golden canines, inhumanly long tongue curling at the end in mirth. This was his mouth now. No one else in the universe had a mouth like this, this was unique! This was - “b-broken.”

That voice again...

“… Kkrrokennn... ” he slurred against his palate, tongue grotesquely twitching towards his chest as it attempt to form the word.

Now there was a memory he’d prefer to have not surfaced right now, swallowing the tongue slowly back into his throat as the mandible began to close.

It had been a long time, huh. Long time since he’d first noticed. Long time since he’d last asked why… He lifted his left hand and carefully pressed the lagging right mandible upwards, feeling the click as it connected and realigned with its twin. His eyes locked on his mouth in the mirror’s reflection, and absolutely not on the shape his peripheral vision insisted was standing in the darkness behind him. The one that he was aware was now speaking once more…

“Maybe it was j-just easier for her to not say the truth. Maybe you were less of a burden on her that way, huh. She m-must have been so tired of looking after you, Pop too. They must have been counting the minutes…” He heard it whisper in the back of his mind, that sickening, gentle voice it was getting harder and harder to tune out recently.

“Shut the fuck up.” He muttered under his breath, slowly leaning over the sink and resting his elbows in the rim, watching the water spiral down into the darkness of the drain. He’d made himself.. he’d made himself even more different now. Hadn’t he. Even more broken. What would she think now.

He treasures the memory of Leda. He loves her completely, and he knows that’s true, because damn.. the feelings never changed. He’s never stopped. When he thinks about his mother, he feels the exact same way he did last time he saw her. He was what, 8? Yeah. They were 8 when it happened, that’s right. They were 25 now… They had decayed from children into monsters and still, the exact same warmth blossoms deep in his core when he thinks of her now as it did when he was a little boy.

He feels the twinge of a smile pull at the seam on his lip as he focuses on letting his mind wander back to when he last saw her, but he wishes, in a festering way, she could see him now. Not because it would make her proud, no. God no. He knows she would be repulsed by what he sees in the mirror now, the thing with the metal fangs and hatred inked into its skin, but because he could show her how broken he really had been. 

That he knew all along when he’d asked over and over as a child. That she should have just told him and not wasted her love and care on something that would become so disgusting.

He closes his eyes, listening to the running water gargling down the echoing pipe below him, and leans heavier onto this arms. Remembering.

God. He had been so sick.

-----

Day after day, unable to leave his parent’s bed, watching Tyreen’s tantrum’s towards Momma and Pop because Troy couldn’t come explore, or Troy was coughing too much, or Troy got to sleep with them when she didn’t, and it had really hurt to see her sad because of him. It had been his fault she was lonely.

He remembers the guilt, wanting so much to get up and go play with his sister, but not being able to stand for too long before the shakes would start, and then the seizures... Remembers being bundled up in Leda’s arms and bouncing against her hard shoulder as she ran back to their home, screaming at Typhon for letting Troy out of his sight. Troy was sick. Troy needed to rest. But he rested for so long that he forgot what it had been like before, and he never got any better.

He remembers the endless questions, and that they never gave him real answers, even though deep down he knew it was just because he was...

“Why do my stripes not glow, but Ty’s do, Pop?”

“Ty-die, how come you can make those sparks but I can’t do anything?“

“Momma how come everyone else has two arms and everyone else isn’t sick and I’m...“

“Broken broken broken BROKEN”

He remembers the gentle jostle of Leda shifting over onto the bed with him, the heat of her big strong hands against his ribs as she helped prop him up against the pillow as he weakly reached for the little wooden Knight he had left behind on Nekrotafeyo when they escaped. The one Sparrow had made for him. He remembers the frustration of not being able to hold it tightly enough to lift it, and how that seemed so very important at the time. Like it was the most unfair thing in the world. He remembers the comfort of her long fingers sweeping the hair back from his feverish forehead as he glared down at the faded wooden Knight with it’s snapped leg and peeling green paint, and the exhaustion in her voice as she wearily answered -

“Well.. not everyone is the same, Moonbright. Some people are sick sometimes, some people have shapes that might not look like other’s. Some people can sing, some people are clever, some people are kind, some people are terrible. Everyone’s different, babe. ”

And he remembers how dumb that answer sounded, trying not to be angry as he frowned, rolling the little wooden Knight on his lap as he stared down at the dull red markings across the fingers that gripped its broken leg.

“Yeah but Momma.. Why am I so different. ”

---

They never answered it. They never just said the truth. "Everyone is different" is obvious, of course he knew that. Kids aren’t stupid, and he had been a clever kid.. he had spent so many days in that bed wondering why they never just told him the reason he was so.. wrong. So many more as an adult wondering why did it take 13 more years of thinking back and questioning for Tyreen to matter of factly state “...Cuz they were waiting for you to die.” while filing her nails one evening in their shared quarters.

He knows now that they did it out of love, but he also knows he harbors some deep, toxic frustration with his parents because of it. He knows they were trying to keep him happy, that they thought the truth too cruel, but… he spent so many nights sick and alone and in pain, wondering that same question over and over as a child.. and they never told him.

Ty did. Ty does. Ty knows he’s just fucking broken.

They had tried to lie, to keep him from the cruel reality, but it had been true, and he wishes Leda could look at him now, see him hunched over a bloody sink having defiled his face, just so that she could turn away from him in disgust. Then he could know she hated him. Then he could stop holding on, just give up. Just let it go. Become this thing he’d crafted himself into, instead of holding on to dying threads of who he wished he still was inside.  He lifts his hand to his face and presses his fingers into the bridge of his nose, pinching, the swirling water background noise now against the pressure inside his head.

How much of him was even left, really. How much of him was metal now, how much of him was the God King.

Years ago, when they had first arrived, Seifa had said he could become anything he wanted to make himself on Pandora, that he had a fresh start. A life. That it could be his choice, and that he had as much a say in it as Tyreen… and look at what he had made himself into in the end.

Exactly what she’d sworn to him that he wasn’t.

Less than 6 months since she’d dropped him like the burden he was, and he’d done this. He’d betrayed them both. Would Mom cry, or not have the tears to waste on what he’d chosen to become after everything she did to try and hide it from him.

A broken, monstrous thing.

He sighs, squinting at the faucet before reaching out and turning it off,  then rubs at his eyes in the quiet of the dark washroom, smearing eyeliner further across his cheeks. He’s tired. He could have done without remembering this. It’s hard enough to sleep nowadays without getting stuck on shit like this all night. He stands slowly, stretching his back with a series of pops, and touches the tender side of his jaw gingerly. He still had a few of those painkillers, he remembers with a sniff. Couple of those should knock him out. Keep the nightmares away for one more night. He’d be making his big reveal soon anyway…  With one last glance at the mirror, confirming he was alone in the room, Troy turned and walked towards the door to his bedchamber. Sleep now. Emotional bullshit later. That was for tomorrow him, he’d fix it then. He could fix everything, after all. Fixing problems was his forte. He only ever needed time.

---

The LetsFlay numbers looked gooood.

3 billion concurrent viewers and rising according to the stream data flickering in the inner forearm of his prosthetic, they were hungry for this. They were hungry to see him, he gloated, easily sidestepping the frantic stabbing of the heretic who’d been unfortunate enough to find themself face to face with God King Calypso in the wild melee of this raid.  3.5 now he glimpsed, grin wide enough to strain the clips at his cheeks as his sword crunched through the man’s torso, the weight of his prosthetic arm enough to make its downwards swing render solid bone to wet fragments. They didn’t even have time to yelp. Shame, that would have been great for the fans watching from home.  He’d planned ahead to get the hype built around this specific raid, his media team working around the clock to spread articles and social updates that the King would be making an appearance, the first in the public’s eye in 2 months, and that he had a fun surprise to unveil for his followers. That he would be leading this raid, just him, all him. No Tyreen. She wasn’t needed this time. 

The chaos around him is deafening, screeches shrieking over gunfire as COV marauders scream litanies to the Twin Gods while tearing the camp and its inhabitants apart. Heretics, idiots, they brought this on themselves. They should have taken the offer, joined the Children of the Vault when approached, not attacked a protected caravan in response. He laughs viciously over the raucous, grabbing a panicked bandit who’d dropped to their knees to beg for mercy in front of him, stuttering that they were a true believer as his retinue of crusaders slaughtered other heretics around them. Bullshit. Now they were just fodder, fuel for the media machine, playthings to tear apart on livestream and rile up the followers, get those sweet donations coming in, and mannn were those donations coming in, he noted with a chuckle, barely registering the wet popping of the man’s ribs puncturing his lungs as he ground him into the dirt with the monstrous robotic fist.

This was a great score. This was a game now, and he wished she could see him, blood spattering over his bare, toned torso as he marched onwards, pausing only to rip another piece of screeching meat in two, or sink metal teeth into a limb and tear it from its joint, and each new kill made the score go up:

--- 4 billion viewers. ---

His eyes burn with laughter as he crushes another throat, skin flushed and breathing heavy.

--- 4.5 billion viewers. ---

He sensually smears the blood dripping from his gilded mouth over his chest and abdomen with a obscene caress of his hand, maintaining eye contact with the floating cam circling him as he sneers, the adoration of billions of rabid followers flowing back through the flashing lens.

--- 5.5 billion viewers.

25 billion dollars in donations and it was all for HIM, for God King Calypso. ---

He wished Leda could see him now. 

She can’t, but if she could, she’d really see. She’d know what he was all along. That she’d been wrong, and she should had killed him when she had the chance. Then he wouldn’t be here now, doing this to these filth.

His heart is pounding and he can’t fill his lungs quick enough, the insanity of the camp being slaughtered around him is just a blur of viscera and violence. It’s a bloodthirsty high he’s not felt in years and he’s lost to it, the carnal pulse of snapping bone and screaming faces, he’s invincible. He’s immortal, a God tearing through paper thin flesh as it laughs through bloodstained fangs. He’s Troy Calypso, Twin God, God King, he’s perf- Breath rushes out of his chest in a forced bellow as fire erupts through his ribs, and everything stops.

No sound, no movement. Just a heretic to his left, a crude bayonet, and a lucky stab. His retinue guard missed the open flank. A crusader is screaming his name but it’s not reaching him, he can’t hear them now. All he can see is this disgusting, meaningless, mortal thing staring into the eyes of a God, and the raw terror in their gaze as they realise they’ve missed anything vital. They whisper something, perhaps an apology, but it’s too late.

In one fluid motion, Troy’s maw splits and engulfs their entire head as he whips to the side.

There is a single second that feels like an infinity as the entire camp seems to draw in a silent breath, as every marauder, every crusader, every piece of bandit scum looks on in silent, horrified awe. Billions of eyes across the echonet watch in shock in that moment that seems to last an eternity. Watch as he feels the man’s muffled scream start against his tongue, as the serrated fangs lock into his flesh, watch as with a guttural roar, Troy bites down…

… and the heretic’s skull is crushed in his jaws.

Bone shards and pulped brain matter burst between the mandibles in a spray of gore, and the bloodcurdling screech that rises up from the followers throughout the camp is like nothing he has ever heard. It’s like a dream.

It’s a swelling hymn from the mouths of hundreds, all to him, to his glory. They shriek his name in a fervent prayer to their hallowed God King, and he closes his eyes as the chanting swells to a cacophony around him, blood streaming down his chest as he lets the mangled body drop from his hanging maw to the ground.

The hysterical screaming rises to fever pitch, and he stands, unmoving. Their God. Eyes closed and arms held open in triumphant welcome as the deafening noise engulfs him, heart pounding through frantic ecstasy as viscera drops from his twitching jaws.

A towering monster standing amongst the corpses of insects.

He glances down, panting, at his stream data. Letting his mind focus on the blinking panel as he yanks the bloody bayonet from his heaving ribs with a grunt.

--- 8.5 billion live viewers. 

“God King Calypso” trending across all major social media.

55 billion dollars in donations to the LetsFlay stream. ---

He wishes she could see what he is now, so he could stop pretending to himself she’d still love him.

He just hopes the camera isn’t picking up the tears he can taste as they drip from his cheeks and run down his squirming tongue.

Check out the #my hcs and #my writing tags on blog for more content if you enjoyed this! Comments and reblogs appreciated. :)

#borderlands #borderlands 3 #bl3 #troy calypso #tyreen calypso #calypso twins #my writing #my hcs #ocs #seifa

[kaydeefalls]

Tagged by: @andrea-lyn​, and obviously I’m currently procrastinating, so it’s meme time! 

Name(s):  I’ve been kaydee falls on the internet since 1998. Not gonna change it now. :P

Fandom(s): Primarily The Old Guard at the moment, if you couldn’t tell by the... *gestures vaguely at my entire tumblr since July* ...but also still active this year in X-Men and Star Wars (must finish WIP, goddamn it), and once I’m in a fandom, I almost never truly leave it.

Where you post: AO3 exclusively at this point.

Most Popular One Shot (by kudos) 
this year :  life is very long, my first Old Guard fic, which holy SHIT leapt up into my top five fics by kudos of all time TERRIFYINGLY quickly -- I know it’s just luck, I got it posted like a week after the movie hit Netflix and right as the fandom boom hit but before there were very many fics to read, so very much a right-place-at-the-right-time situation there; Overall: Logical Deduction, a very silly old Remus/Sirius fic, and it cracks me up that this ridiculous little fic from 2006 somehow climbed to the top of my stats. It’s not very good, but it’s funny, so...I guess?


Most Popular Multi-Chapter (by kudos)
 Overall: Huh, this one surprised me, but apparently The Rose of Jericho, which was my Jack/Ianto COE fixit fic. I don’t often break fics into chapters, although I’ve started picking up the habit over the past year.

Favorite story you’ve written so far:
 Depends on the time of day and my mood. ;) But usually I land on either Boden’s Mate (X-Men/Inception crossover) or she's the one that they call old whatsername (always-a-girl!Kirk and still my only Star Trek fic to date). I have an enduring fondness for those two in particular.

Fic you were nervous to post: I don’t really get nervous about posting fic? I guess because I’ve been doing this shit since I was thirteen years old. And I’ve been lucky in that I’ve only VERY rarely gotten nasty comments, which is the only thing I can think of to be nervous about. My fics might land with a thud sometimes and get very little response, which makes me a little sad because I’m a writer and I like feedback, but that’s not something that causes me anxiety.

How do you choose your titles?: I raid song lyrics and poetry for titles like 95% of the time. Titles are the WORST.

Do you outline?: I tend to bulletpoint once I get into writing a fic, just to keep track of where I’m going. Sometimes it gets detailed; more often it’s just stream-of-consciousness. Or laying out the scenes I know I need to write as a way to gauge my own progress and feel like I’m getting somewhere, eep.

Complete: 7 works posted so far this year (including 1 vid), 1 of which is still a WIP; I should have two more by end of year, since I’ve got two challenge deadlines right at the end of December. 195 total works on AO3. This year I set myself the goal of posting 100k words, and I’m already at 121k, so I’m quite pleased with that! I’m not a super prolific writer, but the fics I post tend to be in the 10-40k word range, so.

In-Progress: Right now I’ve got:

-When It Alteration Finds, the Poe/Finn soulmark WIP AU that I desperately need to fucking finish already, I have ONE CHAPTER LEFT, what is wrong with me.

-Old Guard Big Bang fic, actively in progress and already MUCH longer than I ever intended it to be, oh god make it stop

-Old Guard Holiday Exchange fic, which I have not actually started yet but it’s due in a few weeks so I’m actively THINKING about it at least, that totally counts

-Festivids! I have a vague idea for my vid -- already know the song/fandom I’m going with -- but need to finish the fics first because the Festivids deadline is later.

-...I’m not allowed to think about any other WIPs until the two Old Guard fics are done because those deadlines are fast approaching.

Coming soon/not yet started: Who even knows at this point. I’m fairly confident that the TOG fandom is gonna be stuck with me for a while yet, though. And honestly, I tend to hyperfixate on one fic at a time, so I don’t usually have much planned out in advance.

Prompts?: You know, I’ve never really done prompts? Apart from fandom challenges like Yuletide (which I’m sitting out this year and it’s WEIRD). I’m always open to prompts but don’t like to make any promises, because either an idea hits me or it doesn’t, and if it doesn’t, it’s not a reflection on the prompt itself, but I’m not gonna force myself to write it.

Upcoming work you’re most excited about: TOG Big Bang! It’s already blown up into a WAY longer fic than I planned, so dear god I hope it’s worth it. I am SUPER excited for the art, though, because my artist is freaking awesome.

Tagging anyone who wants to play!

#ask me anything #always a sucker for an askmeme

[ma-sulevin]

WHOA it’s here. It’s not finished because there are going to be like two more chapters, but GOOD NEWS that’s more smut for you. There’s also, like, actually a little plot this time.

Pairing: James Vega/Avery Ryder Rating: E Warnings: No warnings, just smut. Check out the tags on AO3. Word Count: 5969, chapter one of three.

Read it on AO3 instead, or catch up on their story from the beginning.

---

Avery’s halfway through her third reading of an article her doctor gave her about why the new synthetic DNA that had been found mixed with most humans after the end of the Reaper War had made the most popular contraceptive implants less effective when her omnitool chimes with James’ special chime. She jumps and drops the datapad. It clatters to the floor and Jonesy opens one eye to glare at her from where he’s napping on the other chair.

The orange interface pops up when she lifts her wrist to display James’ message: I found the perfect hotel for when you visit! Dec 30-Jan 5 still good??

Oh, James. She’s going to have to tell him before January. It's a few months away, but… she's going to have to tell him.

Another message comes through as she’s considering the first. I know you’ve been sick so thought I’d cheer you up. And then: Whatdid the doctor say?

She closes her omnitool without replying. She can’t talk to him right now. She can’t. She needs to talk this out before she brings him into it, needs to weigh her options and have… she needs help. She would have talked to her mom about all this, before, would have called her up when she first felt sick and gotten a ride to the doctor and then had someone to comfort her when she wanted to cry after.

Every unsafe encounter they had plays out behind her eyelids, in vivid detail: the broken condom, the drunken fuck behind Sam’s house, the sober but ill-advised condom-free sex the rest of the weekend before he shipped out.

One of those times did it.

They’re not goddamn teenagers. This was stupid, and they should have known better. There’s not any fucking excuse for this.

Her omnitool vibrates as James calls her, and she answers out of habit before she realizes what she’s doing.

“Hey, birdie!” His voice is optimistic, almost aggressively so, and she realizes he’s probably convinced she’s dying and doesn’t want to tell him. “You home yet?”

“Yeah, I’m home,” she says, and then… shit.

She chokes on a sob as her vision starts to swim, and she claps a hand over her mouth to stop herself from making any noise that will out her reaction to James.

It doesn’t work.

“What’s wrong?” His response is immediate, his voice low and comforting, and when she doesn’t respond right away she hears him shuffling around over the audio connection. He says something she can’t hear to someone she can’t see, then a door clicks closed and he’s speaking to her again, “Talk to me, Avery. What did the doctor say?”

She clears her throat and wipes at her eyes. “I, uh. I’m pregnant.”

His response is slower this time. It gives her enough time to take a few gasping breaths and for Jonesy to drag himself away from the sun and drape himself over her lap instead, a spot of comfort for the human who took him in after the reapers left.

“What?”

“Yeah, uh… I guess I’m due at the beginning of June.”

She can hear him sighing over the connection, a long exhale that makes her eyes well with more tears. She didn’t mean for this to happen, she thought she was preventing it, even if she wasn’t being as careful as she should have been.

“Birdie,” he says, still kind of sighing, “I thought you were going to tell me something awful.”

“I wouldn’t say this is great news.”

“But you’re okay, you’re not sick.” There’s more shuffling from his end of the line, more mysterious noises she can’t put a name to since he’s on the other side of the planet. “I’ve been worried about you.”

“I’m sorry,” she says, miserable, voice on the edge of cracking again.

“It isn’t your fault—”

“It kinda is, though.” Avery’s not ready to let it go, but James doesn’t seem to be either.

“If anyone’s to blame,” he interrupts, voice a little louder to get her attention before it returns to the lower, more serious tone he’s been using, “it’s me. I wasn’t being careful, and I’m sorry.”

Avery groans and pulls Jonesy up to press her face into his fur. He chirps a little and lets her, starting to purr under her attention. “We can do this all day. I know, I know we said we’re going to try the whole long-distance boyfriend-girlfriend thing, but… this isn’t something we talked about, and I’m not asking you for anything. I don’t want you to feel, like, trapped or anything.”

“We did talk about it.” James doesn’t quite cut her off again, but it’s a near thing, and her temper starts to spark and then fades right away at his words. “You told me you wanted a family, and I said we’d make beautiful babies, and then we started making out on your sink.”

“That’s not really, that’s not really talking about it,” she protests, ignoring the warmth in her cheeks at the memory. “Not, like, ‘what if this happens this weekend,’ talking about it, it was more like ‘generally in the future we have this in common.’ Right?”

“Sure, but…” He trails off, muffles a groan, starts again. “I told you before, I’m not Alec. You don’t have to doubt me. I know this is, uh, way sooner than we thought it would be, but if you’re in this, I’m in this. All the way.”

Avery starts crying again, quietly this time. She hadn’t really had enough time to think about how James would react, but this is more than she could have hoped for. He doesn’t even sound worried or scared or any of the other emotions that have been swirling around in her mind since she found out.

He just sounds… supportive.

Here for her.

No matter what.

“If you still can, I still want you to visit in January. I found a great little house on the beach, it’s new construction obviously, but it’s in the old style. You’ll love it.”

She wipes her nose with the back of her hand. “January?”

“Yeah, birdie.” He sounds hopeful now, more relaxed, and she smiles despite herself. “It’ll be nice and hot, and I have a few days off between training. It’ll be perfect. Just the… just the three of us.”

She laughs, just a little, and James does too.

“Come on, we’re in this together, right? I miss you.”

“I miss you too.” A pause, as she considers, tries to figure out how pregnant she’ll be in January, decides it’s probably okay. “I’ll come see you.”

“Fuck yeah,” he says, and she can hear the smile in his voice, can picture it so clearly in her mind. “I can’t wait.”

And, despite the tears still threatening to come back, she can’t either.

—-

James is fucking terrified. He’d never ever tell Avery that in a million years, absolutely unwilling to freak her out or make her worry for even a second that he’s going to leave her or treat their baby like Alec treated her, but he’s terrified about the future.

Sam gets an earful about it every time he comes up with a new concern, and she calms him down or calls him an idiot, depending on what the problem is, at least once a week. With her on his side, he’s able to listen to Avery’s worries and excitement (depending on where her mood has swung) and calm her down or gas her up, whatever she needs, whatever support he can offer her from the other side of the planet.

N-school is tough, and he’s exhausted so much of the time, and he misses her with every fiber of his being. He wants to be there with her right now, he wants to be home in her apartment, but every time he casually mentions putting off N-school for a year or two, she yells at him.

She’s not going to be the reason he puts off his dreams, even if his dreams are keeping them apart.

They’re starting a family at the worst possible time, and he can’t be with her, and he’s in love with her and she doesn’t even know it yet because he’s too much of a fucking coward to tell her.

He keeps trying, wants to tell her when they’re video chatting, staying up way too late to share their secrets; he wants to tell her every time she sends him an ultrasound, every time she sends him a picture of her belly as it grows (he still thinks it’s pretty small, even though she insists she already feels big), every time she sends him a dirty picture when he’s in class, and every time she smiles at him, flushed and happy, over a late-night vid call that ended in yet another round of phone sex.

He wants to tell her, but he’s a coward, and he’s afraid of her response, and anyway, shouldn’t that kind of confession be in person?

That’s what he’s been telling himself at least, and so he’s kept his mouth shut, and he’s fucking terrified because he’s going to be a dad and he’s in love with his girlfriend and he’s standing at the shuttleport with flowers clutched in sweaty hands because he wants to give her every good thing in the world.

He’s not prepared to see her being pushed in a wheelchair by a put-upon employee, looking absolutely murderous as she slouches with her shoulders up around her ears.

She catches his eyes and her face flashes as red as her hair, but she still points him out to the man pushing her. They change course and head straight for him, the employee looking at James with something like pity before he manages to smooth his expression back out into something politely neutral.

“What the — what happened?”

He looks from Avery to the man helping her and back, completely torn, flowers forgotten in his hands as he lowers them to his side.

Avery hauls in a deep breath. “You get a little motion sick—”

“She passed out, sir,” the man says, obviously done with Avery’s bullshit if the interruption and somewhat dead expression in his eyes is any indication. “It’s company policy to assist ill passengers to either medical help or to their destinations.”

“Okay, uhh, thank you.” James stares at him for another minute before moving a little closer and offering Avery his free hand. She takes it with a mutinous expression and stands up mostly under her own power, stumbling a little before she’s fully upright. She flushes red again, this time, he thinks, in embarrassment. “Do you have — oh, thanks.” 

The man hands James a duffle bag and takes the wheelchair with him as he leaves, and James stands staring at Avery for several seconds before he manages to find his words.

“You passed out?”

She shrugs and avoids his eyes. “Just a little.”

“Birdie—”

“I just get motion sick anyway and the baby makes it worse. I promise I’m okay. Hey.” She finally looks up and meets his eyes, reaches out and puts her hands on his waist. “I missed you.”

The little knot of terror and worry relaxes a little when he sees her smiling at him, a soft expression aimed at him, close enough to kiss… so he does, leaning down and pressing his lips to hers in the softest kiss he can manage as she tries to push herself closer and hold him in place with her fingers tugging at his shirt.

He forces himself back up to his full height and smiles widely at the little pout she gives him.

“C’mon, let’s go to the house. Here.” He hands her the flowers he brought with him, excitement briefly overwhelming the anxiety that’s been plaguing him. She smiles and gives the bouquet a tentative sniff before inhaling again, more deeply.

He waits for her to pass judgment — on the flowers, on him, on the trip in general — and he’s still staring at her when she opens her eyes and offers him a wide, bright smile. She looks more like her old self, the one he remembers from London, color coming back into her cheeks and something playful in her expression.

“Get moving, soldier. We have a vacation to start.”

He grins down at her and slings her duffle over his shoulder before taking her hand. She lets him pull her outside to flag down a taxi, then she snuggles up against his side and slips her hand into the back pocket of his jeans.

“I’m glad you could come.” He wraps his free arm around her shoulders and squeezes, and when she giggles, the noise is pressed against his ribs. He glances down and all he can see is one of her eyes as she peers up sideways at him.

“You’re going to be extra glad when you see what I brought.”

A taxi pulls up and the driver pops the trunk for her bag. James detangles himself from her, taking a second to enjoy the sight of her smirking at him with one hand resting on the bump that her shirt mostly hides.

“Oh? You bring something fun?”

She shrugs one shoulder and then somehow manages to look up at him from under her lashes without moving, and his heart does a funny little flip in his chest that has nothing to do with the promise written on her face and more to do with the confession he wants to make.

“A few things I think you’ll enjoy. You have to wait.”

He opens the door for her and snags a lingering kiss before she climbs in, swiping his tongue against her lower lip just to see the way it makes her eyes go dark and her lips part a bit.

Dios, she’s beautiful.

He loves her.

She climbs in the taxi with a wink, and he follows her without another word.

—-

He’s a little disappointed but not particularly surprised when she falls asleep on the way to their little rental house, her head tucked against his shoulder and her fingers tangled up in his like she never wants to let go.

She snores a little bit the whole way there, earning her several amused looks from the driver. James just keeps her hand tight in his and the warmth locked in his chest.

He can’t stop himself from smiling, though, not with her resting against him.

It almost makes him wish he hadn’t come to N-school at all.

She’s groggy when he wakes her up, rubbing at her eyes and smearing her mascara without noticing, and he ushers her into the rental without stopping to point out how close they are to the ocean, how private it is with the closely-growing foliage, or how he came out early and stocked the kitchen so they’d only have to go out in public if they want to. He just points her in the direction of the bed and takes off her shoes when she drops onto the blankets without undressing at all.

He putters around the house, looking for something to do to give her space. He puts the flowers in water, puts her bag up next to his, then eventually settles on the bed next to her with the datapad he wasn’t supposed to bring to work on reports for N-school he isn’t supposed to start until after she goes back to London.

He wonders if she’ll be willing to ask for a transfer to Brazil, or if she’ll want to stay in London where she has more friends, something of a support system for when he’s too busy or gone.

At least in London, she has Sam.

He decides he won’t ask.

At some point, she rolls over and shifts higher up the bed, opening one eye to stare at him like she’s not sure who he is or why he’s in her bed, then she blinks and a slow smile stretches across her face. She reaches out one hand for him, and he wraps his fingers around hers until she falls back asleep about ten seconds later.

It’s the cutest fucking thing he’s ever seen.

She finally wakes up after a couple hours and staggers to the bathroom without saying anything. She pops back out a minute later, all smiles, shaking out red hair that’s almost down to her elbows now.

He puts the datapad away and moves to sit up right at the edge of the mattress.

“Feel better?”

“Mhm…” She comes to stand between his knees and he lets his hands rest on her hips, easy as anything, like it hasn’t been nearly five months since he’s seen her. She stops playing with her hair and runs her fingers into his the best she can with most of it so short. “You shouldn’t’ve let me sleep so long.”

He slips his hands up under her shirt to rest against her skin. “You needed it.”

She makes a quiet little humming noise, not really agreeing or disagreeing, and leans in close like she’s going to kiss him. Their noses brush together, but she doesn’t press her lips to his, and he can’t help but tighten his grip on her.

“You know what else I need?”

He thinks he has a pretty good idea, but when he tilts his head up to kiss her, she stays just far enough away so he can’t.

“Birdie…”

She dips her head and he tilts his chin up, but she refuses to come close enough, her fingers tightening on his scalp in a way that sends shivers of pleasure down his spine.

He loves when she’s like this.

He loves it.

“I believe I was promised a nice, big, delicious —” He tries to pull her closer mid-sentence, but she resists as her grin grows, “—fruity drink, and a white-sand beach, and a chance to show off the little bikini I bought.”

She nips his lower lip instead of kissing him and slips out of his grip as he groans. He can hear her giggling to herself as she grabs her bag and disappears back into the bathroom with it, leaving him to sit on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands.

He’s been waiting so long to get his hands on her and he can’t even lie to himself to say he’s annoyed with her teasing.

He loves that too.

He’s still sitting on the bed when she emerges from the bathroom once more, this time in the little bikini she’d promised, the one he’d requested be held together with strings. It’s tiny and black, and it shows off her curves, and all he can think about is tangling his fingers in all that red hair and refusing to let her out of the house all week.

He doesn’t realize he’s just staring at her with his mouth open until she starts to laugh, walking closer with an exaggerated sway in her step to stand between his knees again.

She tips his chin up with her fingers. “See something you like?”

“Uhh… can I…” His hands hover in the air on either side of her stomach, a swirl of confusing feelings washing over him. He wants to yank her into his lap, roll them over on the bed, absolutely devour her; he wants to take her to the beach, take her to his favorite restaurant, show her off to the world; he wants to hold her and tell her she’s beautiful, that he loves her, that he can’t wait to meet their baby. He wants. 

She’s smiling at him still, but it’s a little softer, something in her eyes he can’t quite identify. “Go ahead.”

He’s tentative as he finally touches her, hands running over her biotic-warm skin, over scars and skin weaves and the surprisingly firm slope that leads down to her belly button. He brushes his fingertips across her skin, just the barest of touches, and she rests her hands on the small of her back as she waits for him to finish exploring this new part of her. 

“Is she, um. Is she awake?” The question feels silly, he feels silly for asking it, but Avery doesn’t look like she’s laughing at him. 

She just looks happy.

She puts her hand next to his as she shakes her head, then she pushes hard against the bump. “Nope. Lazy little thing.”

“Hey, growing is a hard job.” He leans forward and kisses the biggest part of the bump, then just under the string of her bikini top in something meant to be little gestures of affection but that makes her inhale sharply instead. He rests his chin there and looks up at her, unable to stop from smirking when he sees her cheeks stained pink. “Give her a break.”

He slides his hands around to rest on her back and pulls, and this time she lets him tug her all the way into his lap. She settles with her knees on either side of his hips and rests her hands on his shoulders.

“She can have a break when I get one,” Avery says, voice prim, repeating something she always says, and then she finally finally kisses him.

Oh, he’s missed this.

She kisses him like she can’t get enough, like she’d devour him if she could, hungry and desperate and everything he’s been waiting for. He opens his mouth to her and lets her lick into it as he runs his hands up her back. She’s warm and delicious and everything he wants, and he pulls at the bow holding her bikini top together without thinking about it.

She giggles and bites at his lower lip, tugging as she leans back before releasing him to pull her top off and drop it to the floor.

“Guess we can look at the beach later?” She arches her back as she speaks, and he barely hears her words as his gaze is drawn, as she intended, to her breasts and nipples that are little darker than he remembers, but still beautiful all the same. 

He doesn’t bother to answer whatever she asked, choosing instead to let her figure it out by kissing down between the valley of her breasts and then over, keeping her in his lap with one hand on her back and cupping the weight of her breast with the other, squeezing, licking and sucking at the hard peak as she gasps and squirms in his grip.

The pressure of her body on his dick is getting to him, her restless little movements just making him harder, and he groans around her flesh in his mouth as she manages to hit him just right, grinding against the bulge trapped in his pants like she was always meant to do this.

“Fuck, I missed this,” she says, voice small and breathy. She digs her fingernails into his scalp and holds him close, like he’d ever willingly push her away right now. “Your tongue is amazing. I could come just from this.”

She gives her hips another strong thrust as she does, like she’s trying to prove her point, and he can’t help but peer up at her.

He’s never been one to back down from a challenge.

He braces his feet better on the floor and moves both his hands to her hips to help guide her, forcing her hips into a steady, rolling movement over his lap until he hears her shuddering little gasps each time he hits her clit just right. He keeps his mouth busy leaving little nipping kisses across her chest, giving both breasts the kind of attention he’s literally been dreaming about, letting her ramble about how good he is to her, just giving her all the attention she deserves until…

Her breath catches in her throat and then bursts out of her in a high-pitched whine, and her hips fight back against the motion of his hands, and her fingernails dig into his scalp.

She’s close, she’s so close he knows she just needs a little push, and so he groans against her chest and bites down just enough to change up the sensation, just enough to give his kisses that edge, and then she’s falling apart in his hands just like he knew she would.

A wordless cry falls from her lips and she shudders through it, holding him tight and pressing against him as hard as she can. It’s beautiful, and he can’t keep his eyes off her, off the goosebumps that flow over her skin and the red flush that reaches from her face down across her chest.

He wants to make her feel this good every single day of her life.

She pulls away after a moment, still panting, a wide grin on her face as she opens lust-darkened eyes and stares down at him. 

He smirks up at her, stupidly pleased, and then she’s pushing at his shoulders so he’ll fall onto his back.

“You have five seconds to get your clothes off,” she informs him, and then she stands up to follow her own command.

It takes more than five seconds, but he’s so ready to get his pants off that he doesn’t argue, jumping up and stripping in record time as Avery simply pushes her bikini bottoms over her hips and leaves them on the floor.

She’s already scooting back on the bed to get comfortable, her eyes on his dick where he’s stroking it because he can’t help but touch it to push back the desire to sink into her biotic-hot body and forget everything else in the galaxy.

He crawls over her, and she opens up for him, bracketing his waist with her knees and parting her lips to make their first kiss deep and wet, already trying to angle her hips up to meet his even as he keeps his weight braced up and well away from her.

She makes a little frustrated noise, grabbing for his dog tags like she always does. “C’mon, Jimmy.”

He lets her pull her close enough to kiss her, a teasing little swipe of his tongue across her lower lip. She releases him with a smile, then she squeals as he leans down and bites at her nipple once more, still reddened and swollen from his earlier attention.

He kisses between her breasts, down her stomach, across her hip, pausing to nip at her inner thigh when she spreads her legs further apart for the breadth of his shoulders.

She’s grinning down at him when he looks up at her, something smug on her face as she anticipates what he’s about to do.

“I missed that tongue of yours while you’ve been here.”

“That right?” He licks over the spot he bit and watches as she bites her lower lip. “Well, it missed you too.”

She huffs out a laugh and flops back onto the pillows, but her legs stay open and her hips cant up toward his mouth, eager like always.

He gives in, like always.

The taste of her bursts bright and tart on his tongue, and he moans against her as he licks up her slit. He presses his tongue in deep when she starts to grind up against his face, then moves a little closer in on his elbows so he can start up a fast pattern over her clit just to hear her—

She swears roundly, hands landing on the back of his head like they belong there, tugging him closer like he’d try to leave. 

He never wants to leave.

He holds her hips as steady as he can with his arms under her thighs, and doesn’t put effort into teasing her in favor of just giving her what she wants. She came all this way to see him, and he’s going to make sure she never forgets what he’s able to do for her, what he’s able to coax out of her body.

Her quiet groans become louder, cries of his name and little admissions that make his dick ache to be inside of her, unhappy to be pushed into the mattress for the time being.

“Fuck, you’re so good at this,” she says, voice breathy and rambling like she can’t help it, “I don’t know how I snagged you, don’t know how there aren’t girls lining up for a turn.”

His laugh is buried deep in her cunt but she hears it anyway, or she feels it, because she bites off a high-pitched moan that lets him know she’s close but not quite there before she picks back up where she left off.

“Mmm, yeah, you know it’s true just look at you, fucking hungry for it, couldn’t even wait until after we went to the beach.”

He’s not about to pull his mouth free to remind her that she’s the one who started teasing him, she’s the one who was talking about what big delicious things she needed, so he just tightens his grip on her hips and closes his eyes and focuses on the way his tongue is dancing over her clit because she’s so close and if he can just get her in the right spot…

“Fuck, right there.” She catches her breath, lets it out in a whoosh, and her thighs start to shake by his ears. “I’m gonna come, baby.” 

It’s the only time she calls him baby, right as she’s about to come, and he loves to hear it, loves to coax it or force it out of her, and he just has to wait one more second she’s so close—

When she comes it’s absolutely silent, her body going taught around him, her fingers digging painfully into his scalp, her thighs tense and shaking, blocking him in from moving, her feet pressed against his sides like she can hold him there.

He keeps licking her until she catches her breath and manages to wail, the sound ripped from her almost against her will, and then she’s pushing him away because she’s too sensitive now, but he needs to be able to breathe anyway.

He sits back on his heels and wipes his face as she tries to catch her breath, legs still spread obscenely on either side of him, one arm hooked over her face so she can hide her eyes behind her elbow.

“That good, huh?”

“Fuck you,” she says, absolutely no venom in her voice. 

He snickers and leans over her, bracing his weight on his elbows and knees, kissing her under her arm. She kisses him back and hooks her elbow around the back of his neck instead of holding it over her face. She licks his lips, into his mouth, moaning at the taste of herself like she always does, and he follows his instincts to sink down lower when he feels her legs come up around his hips too.

Her stomach bumps against his before he’s expecting it to, and he tries to push back up before she locks her ankles at the small of his back.

“Nuh-uh,” she says, fucked out and eloquent.

“You sure this is—” He trails off because she finally opens her eyes and looks up at him, moving her hands around to cup his jaw.

Her fingers trace his cheeks, dance over the scar that traces across his face, and his heart does that same little flop as before. “Perfectly safe. Recommended, even. I’ll tell you if something hurts, just, please, please for the love of god, fuck me.”

Well.

He can’t argue with that.

He kisses her again, then pulls away with a little smirk. “Yes, ma’am.”

She lets go of his neck and puts her hands flat on the headboard behind her, smirking right back, and he takes his cue to sit back on his heels.

He takes himself in hand and lines up, not bothering to tease anymore, slipping deep inside her with one slow, delicious thrust.

He can barely hear her whimper over his own groan at being inside of her again. It’s everything he’s been missing and somehow better than he remembered, tight and almost too hot and he never, ever wants to leave.

When he doesn’t move fast enough for her, too busy enjoying the feeling of being inside her again, she uses her leverage to push her hips hard into his, nearly knocking him off-balance

“Goddamn,” he says, forcing the word out through grit teeth. “Okay. You asked for it.”

He looks down to see her face break into a wide, dirty smile, her face flushed and hair sticking to her damp forehead.

And then he pulls out, and pushes back in, hard, and he grins at the delighted laugh that pushes from Avery’s throat.

He can do better than that.

He fucks her, hard, just like she asked, a punishing pace that has sweat dripping from his scalp and pleasure shooting up his spine faster than he’d like.

It has been a long time.

He puts his hands on her ass and lifts her hips onto his thighs, and the next thrust makes her howl and arch her back, a delighted sound that he wants her to make again, so he grits his teeth together against the mounting pleasure and keeps fucking going.

She’s going to come again.

She deserves it.

“This what you wanted, birdie?” His voice is rough, words forced out between sharp thrusts and harsh breaths, but they have the effect he wanted. She arches again, squirming against his bruising grip, face twisted in what he would think is pain if he didn’t know better. “This what you flew all the way out here for?”

Her “Yes!” is frantic, barely an answer to his question and more of a general exclamation of approval, and he smiles to himself as he shifts his grip on her so he can bring his right hand to her clit. She shrieks again when he presses his thumb against it, hips moving a little slower now so he can focus, but no less hard, and she absolutely howls with it.

She’s so close.

He is too.

“Come for me,” he says, trying to make it sound more like a demand and less like the plea it is. “Let me fucking feel you.”

She nods, fast, eyes squeezed closed and mouth open, chest heaving as she draws in ragged breaths.

He presses harder with his thumb, his orgasm threatening to overwhelm him at any moment, praying, praying, praying…

She begins to come barely a second before him, his name dripping from her lips as her cunt clenches around him, and then he can’t hold on for anything. He fucks through it, pleasure bursting through him and making his vision go white, and he curls around her to bury his face in the crook of her neck as he comes inside her.

When he comes back to himself, she’s rubbing circles on his back with one hand, the other cupping the back of his head. 

“Doing okay there?”

She sounds amused, so he just groans in answer, earning the giggle he was aiming for.

“You’re gonna crush me,” she informs him, still sounding amused.

He rolls to the side but doesn’t let go of her, tugging until her back is against his front and her hair is all over his face. It’s annoying, but he can’t make himself care.

She wiggles in his grip. “I thought you were taking me to the beach.”

He squeezes her tighter, presses a kiss to the back of her neck where he thinks her amp port is. “I’m just catching my breath. Give me a minute.”

He’s asleep before he hears her response.

#james vega #mass effect #x: say you won't let go #my writing #pregnancy #oc: avery ryder

[thisbluespirit]

Writing Tag Game

AO3 name: thisbluespirit

Fandoms: my main fandom has always been Doctor Who but I feel v weird about it right now, so: Blake’s 7, Sapphire & Steel, Star Wars Prequels, Spooks (MI5), Once Upon a Time, and a whole load of random other things.

Tropes: honestly, if it seems like a good idea at the time, but accidental marriage, hurt/comfort, time travel, crack-played-straight, crossovers, canon divergence, and no doubt other things I’m forgetting right now.

Number of fics: 576 on AO3 (although there are a couple of vids and 1 podfic in there, plus a handful of fannish origfics, but OTOH there are things on Teaspoon I’ve never brought over and meme ficlets from LJ and Dreamwidth I’ve never posted elsewhere.  It’s such a ridiculous no. of works, even though there are quite a few drabbles and ficlets, that I wind up not posting the other drabbles/ficlets out of embarrassment.  Like, who has time to read 576 works, think of my Remix authors!)

Fic I spent the most time on: Ha, well, I took 9 years to finish one called Strangers at Fairhurst, but that wasn’t time spent writing it.  Probably gift fic for exchanges (and longfic generally for obvious reasons) - many of those took a lot of extra time and research and betaing and things, because, well, it’s a gift.  You want it to be special.

Fic I spent the least time on: Probably some of those meme ficlets, because a lot of them were flash fic so speedy writing was part of the point.

I wrote So We Meet at Last for fan_flashworks in about 30 minutes - and then at some point it got recced somewhere and it was my most popular fic for ages, so the moral of the story is don’t angst over stuff, just write Miss Marple dusting Dracula and the world will love you.

Longest Fic: On AO3, it’s The Poison Tree (Dracula 1968, written for calliopes_pen in Yuletide 2016), which makes it look as if I’ve never got to 30k, but ha ahahaha.  I’ve been ill since 2011.  Before that, I wrote an epic 1980s UNIT series, the final installment of which was 80K +

Shortest Fic: My shortest fic is a drabble, of which I have around 45 on AO3 and while the word count varies on AO3, they were all 100 words exactly in Word, so take your pick.

Most hits/kudos/comment threads/bookmarks: These tend to be exchange fic - by and large that’s the only way anyone knows I exist.  (I really miss LJ/DW comms, because a fic announcement on a relevant comm was a really good way to do that and modern fandom has no equivalent and then everyone gets tunnelled into ship tags, all alike.)

hits - Not bad For a First Attempt  (actually this might have taken the least time - it was a Heyer double drabble I wrote for, er, wrangling reasons.  I’m not sure whether this is true or the hit count has been skewed, but the kudos count is also high, so it might be. Desperate Heyer fans are desperate?)

kudos, comments, & bookmarks - are all The Spirit of St Mary Mead, a Yuletide fic where Miss Marple is a genius loci, which has now overtaken the one where she dusts Dracula.  (The universe only loves me when I write Miss Marple!!)

Total word count: 1,371,543 (which does also include c. 300,000 words of origfic for Runaway Tales, although it doesn’t inc. the c.200,000 words of epic 1980s UNIT adventures, so I suppose it’s only c.100,000 out.)

Favourite fic I wrote: argh, idk, I do like quite a few of them still, but it’s all so dependent on mood and how recent it was and if people commented or not (because if they didn’t, I was obv. wrong about the quality). 

I usually answer this with Salt of the Earth, and I suppose it’s as reasonable as anything else and very me.  It’s about Mrs Tyler from Doctor Who’s “Image of the Fendahl” and how her life went, living by a time rift, fighting evil with folk remedies and rock salt and being 100% better than Torchwood while making a lot less fuss about everything.  So I think it’s still one of the ones I like.

Fic you want to rewrite/expand on: I don’t want to rewrite anything!  I have moved on.  I’ve written a lot of canon divergence AUs since somehow falling into SW Prequels this year and I think there are a couple of those where I thought a lot about where else they might end up, although the moment may have passed, certainly while I’m exhausting myself on exchanges!

Share a bit of a WIP or a story idea you’re planning on: Oh, my main WIPs at the moment are for hurtcomfortex so I can’t.  But, other things:

I do have a work that I need to check over a bit but which is otherwise a complete draft, which is something I originally wrote for (I think) NYR 2017 but either I was too tired to run with it or I wasn’t sure the original recip would like it, but ANYWAY, it’s Department S and sort of Annabelle/Stewart/Jason but also not:

“Yes, well,” said Annabelle, putting the book down away from her work, “perhaps I would have done if I’d been home any time in the last forty-eight hours, but you asked me to feed Auntie half the London Phone Book to analyse.  I’ve been up all night dealing with the ensuing attack of indigestion.”

Stewart perched on the edge of the desk and leant over to kiss her cheek.  “Sorry for the inconvenience.  Any results?”

“Smith is still the most common surname by a significant margin,” said Annabelle and then put her hand to her head and slumped back in the chair.  “The rest is just gibberish, I’m afraid.”  She reached out for the Mark Caine novel.  “As is this, I imagine.”

Otherwise, I am hoping to be done with hurtcomfortex soon, write my AU meme ficlet prompts from my Dreamwidth flist, and then maybe do intobar because that’s always one of the most fun ficathons. 

And somewhere in my notebook I have a crossover drafted out for genprompt_bingo where Barry Allen meets Henry Mills, because I thought that’d be a thing that should happen once (probably pre-canon for OUaT).

But, you know, I need to finish typing up this stupid exchange fic that has gone LONG again and I don’t even know if the recip will even want it...  (I love exchanges, honest, but... :lol:)

tags: @pers-books @allegoriesinmediasres and um I think @captain-aralias did most of the other people I know.  @luthienebonyx maybe?

#writing #fanfic #the secret to fame and fortune: write Miss Marple #apparently #idk