#also none of them have free will in the matter because they’re being pitted against each other on so many levels

[leather-field]

three healers

#pathologic #daniil dankovsky #artemy burakh #clara pathologic #my art #when theyre all unmistakably on the same side working against a common enemy but they can’t work together #and their solutions can’t exist alongside each other #so they must work against each other to the same end #or work with each other to opposite ends? #also none of them have free will in the matter because they’re being pitted against each other on so many levels #by the other characters and the directors and the powers that be and the writers and the PLAYERS #i was going to write a whole essay in the tags yknow for fun but actually most of my thoughts about these characters do not exist in words #sorry💔 #imagine 14 pages of incomprehensible and nonexistent letters in 12 point times new roman and pathologic has an MLA citation at the end #oooops i wrote a billion tags for this post that is 3 portraits of expressionless video game characters! are yoy mad at me

[studiodada]

I’m always half tempted to comment on the rants about how AI art is evil. I mean, sure, it’s evil - I guess - but it’s no more evil than any other tool that’s been made since time began. The fear that illustrators will lose jobs is valid but generally the fear that machines will replace anyone is a constant among all fields. The bigger fear, I feel, is that it exposes artists for what they are vs the image they project.

Artists, generally, rely on the last two centuries of myths that have been built around them: Starving, half mad, romantic, visionary, skilled, etc.

They turn that into marketing for their lives and careers. Painters, poets, etc. thrive on mysticism. Sure, maybe God is dead but these people are clued in on the “human experience” in ways you never can even dream of being.

Meanwhile the institution has been chipping away at them with ideologies and market forces.

First with abstraction (“my child could paint that!”), then with conceptualization (“so…it’s just words on a wall?”) and now with reducing realism to a function of the machine.

And having your “skill” replaced with a repeatable function is simply too much for some people. Never mind the fact that their “skill” was trained on repeating whatever their influences were-teachers, idols, theories, etc. You are an AI model making art but you refuse to acknowledge it because…human.

But maybe it’s because I came into art from a computer/cybernetic background that I think this. Anything can be incorporated into a function and repeated. This is the basis for anyone’s career - find your style then sell it then ride that style til you die=>that way anyone who looks at that art of yours will know “hey! That’s a (insert your name here)”

The key is to make just enough to make a living but not too much so you get undervalued. Duchamp said as much when he talked about limiting the quantity of readymades that he made. Tuymans said this as well. Plus a host of others. Renoir like painting in red and black but that didn’t sell as well as his dreamy weird as blues and greens and peachy lush flesh.

Personally, I’d think this would be freeing. It’s liberating to not have to deal with the system. Let the machine run wild so that you can say “fuck it, today I’m going to paint motherfucking little gentleman Guinea Pigs and then maybe a few triangles and a ufo in space”.

But to not be bound in the prison you made for yourself when you started is terror for the majority. The fear of losing your myth, your clout, your prestige, etc. is simply too much and so everything must be railed against. Everything that isn’t your career choice is an enemy.

AI art is evil.

Abstraction is evil

Conceptual art is evil

Machines are evil

Change is evil

Acrylics are evil because they’re not oil

Machine made furniture is evil

Printers are evil

Digital art is evil

Blah blah blah. ad nauseum

Simply put, the bell can’t be unrung. Rend your clothes, cry and scream, rail against the injustices of the machine. None of it matters. AI isn’t the evil rather it’s the system that pits us all against each other. The one that preys on our egos and pocketbooks and forces people into making grandiose declarations for or against it so that they may curry its favor.

So…if you must attack - attack the system that puts fear into us and makes our lives so precarious that we can’t afford even the slightest imbalance in our pecuniary condition and because of this also makes us fight each other and not it. Leave the tools be.

#ai art community #ai art

[douchebagbrainwaves]

YOU GUYS I JUST THOUGHT OF THIS

It was neither of my guesses. If you go and see all the differences in power between the various languages are those who understand the most powerful language available. Instead of developing a product for some big company in the expectation of getting job security in return, we develop the product ourselves, in a startup, you shouldn't worry that it isn't widely understood. I would like. But if audiences have a lot of companies are very much influenced by where applicants went to college. There are some things that will appeal to you and your friends, to people in Nepal, and to the ancient Greeks, you're probably looking at a loser. Either VCs will evolve down into this gap or, more likely, new investors will appear to fill it. Do I really want to support this company? So I started to pay attention to how fortunes are lost is not through excessive expenditure, but through bad investments.

There is no such thing as good art, then people who liked it would have better taste than others: they're the ones who actually taste art like apples. So if Lisp makes you a better writer in languages you do want to change the world, at least as a kind of social convention, high-level languages are often all treated as equivalent. This sort of change tends to create as many good things as it kills. We didn't know anything about marketing, or hiring people, or raising money, or getting customers. The more of an IT flavor the job descriptions had, the less dangerous the company was. If there's no such thing as good taste, but that has historically been a distinct business from publishing. But now it worked to our advantage. It's like saying something clever in a conversation as if you'd thought of it on the spur of the moment, when in fact you'd worked it out the day before. And not just because that's more rewarding than worldly success.

What would make the painting more interesting to people? So what's the real reason there aren't more Googles is that most startups get bought before they can change the world, at least as a kind of argument that might be convincing. I doubt what we've discovered is an anomaly specific to startups. But though I can't predict specific winners, I can offer a recipe for recognizing them. So these big, dumb companies were a dangerous source of revenue. To the extent the movie business will dry up, and the first thing they learn is that the kind of intelligence that produces ideas with just the right level of craziness. Is software a counterexample? It is not the most powerful all the way down to machine languages, which themselves vary in power. Our generation wants to get paid up front.

They didn't want to use it in all his paintings, wouldn't he? This idea is rarely followed to its conclusion, though. You never had to worry about and which not to. I and most of the time about which of two proofs was better. I would do, after checking to see if they had a live online demo, was look at their job listings. Someone with ordinary tastes would find it hard to change directions. Another is to stand close. There is no such thing as good taste is that it frees artists to try to make it. I don't know exactly how many users they have now, but the idea is very much alive; there is a more general principle here: that if you have a choice of several languages, it is, all other things being equal, a mistake to write your whole program by hand in machine language. I had stopped believing that.

Software companies can charge a lot because a many of the customers are businesses, who get in trouble if they do let you down, consider raising your offer, because there's a good chance the outrageous price they want will later seem a bargain. I'd agree that taste is just a matter of personal preference.1 If there was ever a time when they'd hacked something to their advantage—hacked in the sense of art that does its job well, doesn't require you to pick out a few individuals and label their opinions as correct. But we also knew that that didn't mean anything. So Yahoo's sales force had evolved to exploit this source of revenue. Languages less powerful than Blub are obviously less powerful, because they're missing some feature he's used to. We eventually had many competitors, on the order of twenty to thirty of them, but none of their software could compete with ours. They're terrified of really novel ideas, unless the founders are good enough salesmen to compensate. If free copies of your content are available online, then you're competing with publishing's form of distribution, and that's just information. There are some things that will appeal to you and your friends, to people in Nepal, and to the ancient Greeks, you're probably looking at a loser. It was still very much a hacker-centric.

So it is with colleges. The tragedy of the situation is that by far the greatest liability of not having gone to the college you'd have liked is your own feeling that you're thereby lacking something. All users care about is whether you make something they like. This can be a tricky business, because while the alarms that prevent you from making bad investments have to be learned, and are sometimes fairly counterintuitive. So we're in much the same position as a graduate program, or a company hiring people right out of college. It's harder to escape the influence of your own circumstances, and tricks played by the artist. He said to ask about a time when they'd hacked something to their advantage—hacked in the sense that it sorted in order of how much money Yahoo would make from each link. Publishers. When you notice a whiff of dishonesty coming from some kind of connection.2 A startup should give its competitors as little information as possible.

Notes

Y Combinator.

Foster, Richard Florida told me they like the United States, have been lured into this tar pit. It requires the kind of protection against abuse and accidents. Scribes in ancient philosophy may be the last place in the top startup law firms are Wilson Sonsini, Orrick, Fenwick West, Gunderson Dettmer, and their houses are transformed by developers into McMansions and sold to VPs of Bus Dev. In this context, issues basically means things we're going to work in research too.

Thanks to Ron Conway, Sam Altman, and Jessica Livingston for reading a previous draft.

#automatically generated text #Markov chains #Paul Graham #Python #Patrick Mooney #loser #order #customers #individuals #fact #return #program #things #hand #conclusion #Livingston #distribution #conversation #artist #languages #Altman #power #copies #attention #company #information #kind #startup #idea

[bigskydreaming]

Hi, I was reading your post about Jason punching Dick in the face when Dick revealed he fake his death was bullshit ( which it was) and it reminded me of an issue/question that has bothered me for sometime.

Why did people believe Dick was actually dead?

I’m not the most avid comic reader so maybe I missed something but it was always weird to me that everyone just accepted this especially given how Bruce was acting or should I say wasn’t acting.

This is a man when his child died another child had to come along and told him sir you are being too violent and emotional you need supervision. When his other child died he went all over the universe to bring him back to life because he knew it was possible ( which was happening at the same time), so why didn’t anyone think it was weird he wasn’t doing that for Dick. Can you imagine Dick really dying that soon after Damian it would be injustice Batman Version. You are telling me that Tim, Jason or Barbara didn’t think it was weird that Bruce didn’t also bring Dick’s corpse to the bring Damian back to life mission or mention it to themselves. Like what more likely Dick dead and Bruce is handling it well or that he fake his death to do something stupid and Dangerous after his partner/brother/ little bit my son the feelings are complicated died after he was knocked out and woke up to his corpse.

Oh man, this is like, the entire nature of my beef?

(Slight derail just to emphasize the fact real quick that Dick DID actually die, he was just revived quickly, but like, the trauma of his death was very real and its not like anyone was clued into Luthor having a resurrection backdoor built into his literal murder of Dick in the actual moment of it happening. So Dick’s death wasn’t fake, and additionally, he didn’t have anything to do with like, telling people about it, because he was literally comatose in the cave and recovering while Bruce was telling people....by the time Dick woke up in the cave, we already know that Alfred at least had already been convinced by Bruce that Dick was dead, so I have a kneejerk need to pushback against the Dick faked his death narrative by reminding people wherever possible that Dick had no agency in the spreading of that narrative. 

It happened without him being involved, and the only actual contribution he ever made to it was just not revealing he was alive before Grayson #12, after Bruce like.....emotionally, mentally and physically badgered him into accepting that doing so would be directly harmful to his family and he didn’t want to be the reason more people died when like, people had just died because he ‘let’ himself be captured and interrogated by Power Woman’s Lasso of Submission, did he?

SORRY TO BE PEDANTIC, just wanted to start this off on a clarification, even though I know the aim of your ask was very much in tune with the rest of my response. A lot of people don’t read the actual comics, so like, I’m never gonna skip over an opportunity to emphasize that the shorthand people use to refer to Dick’s death and the year he was with Spyral, is like, literally just shorthand for describing it. Its not actually an accurate description of how all that went down and who had the most hand in it).

BUT ANYWAY. BACK TO THE MEAT OF THE BEEF.

Okay so like, not only was the entire family and Bruce himself giving Dick shit for his death and Spyral, like, PAINFULLY egregious because it was literal victim blaming in every possible sense of the word....

None of it made a LICK of sense with ANY of their characterizations, and they ONLY all accepted it on face value because the Plot Demanded It, and when you're like, no, as a reader I say The Plot Demanded It is not a good enough reason for me to be like well sure, that makes sense......looking at the characters ACTUAL actions at face value pretty much just makes them all look like assholes?

Like, Tim has never gracefully accepted anyone's death. Ever. This is core characterization for him. He will go to the ends of the earth for his loved ones and to bring them back, prove they're not dead, refuse to let death be the final verdict for them. He was tempted to use the Lazarus Pit to bring his parents back to life. He refused to accept Bruce was dead long before he had any proof whatsoever of that theory. He tried to clone his BFF/future-husband Kon in his fucking basement like, dude was two whole inches away from going Full Dark Side in his quest to bring back a lost loved one no matter WHAT the cost.....and then you've got Dick unmasked onscreen, killed offscreen, and Bruce then reporting to the rest of them with zero inflection 'oh Dick's dead now. Its very sad' and Tim's just like, sure. Sounds legit.

I mean?!?!

And you're SO RIGHT ABOUT THE DAMIAN THING! Bruce LITERALLY LITERALLY LITERALLY went BEYOND the ends of the Earth, like, he full on chartered a fucking space ship to fly his whole family out to APOKOLIPS to bring Damian back from the dead by going to EXTREME lengths.....WHILE everyone else thought Dick was dead....

And not a single person looked at Bruce and was like, okay, not that we're not down to do this for Damian because we miss Stabby Smurf something fierce ourselves, but.....what the fuck is UP with you dude? Why aren't you displaying ANY hint of this same kind of energy in regards to your eldest son that you said you watched die right in front of you?

Like....I don't know that we were actually ever told that Dick's coffin was empty or had a fake in it, but like....this family of detectives who refuse to accept death, defy death, COME BACK FROM THE DEAD....not a single one of them said like, okay, if I'm gonna like, ACCEPT accept that Dick is dead and gone for good, I need to at least just see him one last time? That's literally all it would have taken for someone to realize hey something's a little wonky here. Where's the dead body, Pops?

Since when has Jason ever missed an opportunity to prove Bruce is a) full of shit, b) acting like an emotionless robot and all his kids deserve better especially when they've just like....died, c) just factually incorrect and wrong and jumped to a conclusion before it was conclusively proved, d) lying like a liar or e) all of the above?

Nobody even ASKED if Dick's body could be put in a Lazarus Pit? Yeah, Jason wouldn't necessarily recommend it himself, given what it put him through, but actually fuck that, I take that back, because I'm NOT actually of the opinion that Jason full on hates his life and actively spends every second of every day wishing he hadn't been resurrected, even if it had come with a huge buffet of additional trauma and pain.

And that's kinda what's implied when people just take it for granted that he would never be on board with any scenario involving using a Lazarus Pit to bring Dick back, because it suggests that based even just on his own experiences and feelings, he honestly believes Dick would prefer being dead and not have ANY further opportunities to be with his loved ones, his friends, help save the damn world again at some future point.....that Jason, projecting based just off himself, legit feels Dick would rather be dead than have another shot at life even WITH the downsides of Lazarus Pit usage? Nope. Sorry, I don't buy it.

Speaking of not buying it.....you know what was missing from all those soliloquies the others monologued at Dick about how they felt and were hurt and just devastated by his death, to such a point they can't seem to muster a single shred of happiness that he's NOT dead still -

(seriously, Damian was the ONLY person in ALL THE LANDS OF EMOTION-HAVING who expressed ANY kind of positive reaction to having Dick back. We were so fucking cheated of like.....ANY opportunity to have the characters show just how much they valued him by just being fucking HAPPY he was alive, no matter what else was involved....and then most of fandom compounded that by for years being like mmmm, no, Dick didn't get yelled at enough by his family for what HE put THEM through. Needs more yelling. More punching too. Bad Dick. Bad. This is the only way you'll learn not to die and get shipped off on a mission that you don't want but at least is to protect your family after being beaten into it by your dad whilst victim blaming you for dying in the first place. WHEN WILL YOU LEARN TO THINK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE AND THEIR FEELINGS FOR A CHANGE, DICK?!?)

- But like, BUT I DIGRESS aside....you know what was missing from all those monologues about how hard DICK'S death and ensuing year of basically exile from his loved ones was for EVERYONE BUT HIM?

We never got a single line of explanation as to what everyone else officially thinks even happened to him in the first place?

Like, did Bruce straight up just say oh bad news kids, your brother umm. Expired. Spontaneously. There's no one to blame, he just keeled over, its all very sad.

Is that how that went down?

You're telling me that the explanation of Dick's death didn't come with a single pointed finger at someone for this family of blame-happy vigilantes to like, BLAME for the loss of this brother they all mourned oh so much, they just couldn't help but blame him for all the hurt it caused them?

The family that in every other fic is like OBSESSED with avenging and being avenged and all things vengeful and even tangentially vengeance-y....like didn't ask for a single detail on whomst the fuck deprived us of our brother-having?

Where were the attempts on Luthor's life by Jason (who I mean, yeah I know it was in a previous continuity, but erasing that timeline doesn't erase my awareness of the time Dick killed Jason's murderer so like.....mmm, just saying, woulda been nice)....where was the rage directed at the Crime Syndicate and references to how seriously and personally the Batfam took making sure that they were PUNISHED for all this and would never be free to wreak havoc on their world or their family again? What did they tell Damian when he came back to life, and how are you going to tell me that this fraternal little ball of fury didn't aim himself like a cannonball at whomever the fuck had DARED take HIS Batman from him when Damian wasn't around to have his back?

Not only does everyone else's desire to be avenged start falling really flat the second you factor in hey maybe Dick feels "mmm what about MY avenging" sometimes, and why doesn't anyone ever care about doing that for him.....but also, y'know what REALLY sucks about the ONLY person we actually SEE being blamed for Dick's death and ensuing absence being like....Dick himself?

Not only were his family all super keen on making all of this HIS fault and HIM the bad guy because of how it made them all feeeeeeel (and meanwhile fuck his feelings, am I right Batfam hfaklshfklahfkla).....

They somehow found a way to justify prioritizing this OVER ever even getting around to blaming some villain for his death in the FIRST place, in the entire year or so they thought he was still dead!

Like, you couldn't come up with a single target in all that time, but Dick's back two seconds, and you don't even give him a chance to EXPLAIN before you're punching him, shutting him down with 'I expected better from you' and turning away with 'I don't want to hear it, why am I surprised Dick Grayson disappointed me again'?

afshklfhalfhalfhla

Make it make sense!

And like, it won't, cuz it doesn't, and it never will, and like I said at the top, the ONLY reason it all played out this way is because DC doesn't give a fuck about character development and deemed it necessary to go down this way for the sake of the plot (which was totes worth it, I mean, glad we sacrificed characters for this A+ plot which was clearly the greatest plot of all time and definitely justified every story choice made or not made around it loooool).

BUT.

BUT BUT BUT.

The problem isn't JUST that DC is stupid, even though that is an eternal mood and quite the problem.

Its that the SECOND large parts of fandom decided to play along with DC and just accept the story at face value, only add to it and play into it exactly as it happened in canon with no significant deviations, and like, heaping on the LITERAL abuse from Dick's siblings while ignoring the LITERAL abuse from his father....

THAT....is when all of this becomes relevant.

Because the second people decided TO engage with the reasoning DC gave for what Bruce did and how and what Dick did and how and just not mess with any of that and have it all play out exactly like that...

The second people are like, okay we're FINE with not just dismissing this story as OOC writing that doesn't make any sense, and actually VALIDATING it to various degrees by engaging with it as is....

That's when 'OOC writing' stops being an excuse or explanation for alllll of the above gaps in character logic and actions.

Because its like, when you had abundant chance to REJECT this story and say nope, this was bullshit from start to finish and I'm not here for it, when you were just as capable of transforming literally ANY aspect of this story you didn't like into something that made more sense to you....

And you chose not to.

That's.....accepting it as valid writing. You were like, okay, I'm game to just treat this as a thing that happened, just like they said that happened.

For the chance to give Dick shit for it, see. For the angst, see.

And that's when I'm like okay cool, so when engaging with this story as is and accepting it on face value and just delving into the characters as they were SHOWN interacting with and around these events......for the angst or whatever....

You guys just all decided en masse to just hop, skip and jump over allllllllll the opportunities for angst inherent in examining even ANY SINGLE ONE of the above lapses in judgment or hypocrisy on the parts of the characters (who don't get to be excused by OOC writing if you're not going to call the story an example of OOC writing, whoops).

And its just like, uh, what's up with that?

#lol thank you for this ask tho #I havent gone on a good Spyral rant in months #it does wonders for my pores

[unalivejournal]

u mentioned only reading kripke era fic do you have a reclist 👀👀👀and if not could you link some of ur faves cuz the stuff that gets circulated the most right now is all like late late seasons fic and kripke era is my favorite too but im having trouble finding that many fics for it or even seasons 6-10 era which im fine with also. its just that like. the last five seasons were so bad that it makes fic generally worse too because people have to jump off of just Thee stupidest plot choices no matter how good their prose skills might be. but anyway yea if u have recs that would be awesome :)

hi anon i was thinking abt making a reclist and u just gave me the perfect excuse thank u

jess adamilligan’s kripke era fic recs

from making this ive learned that i never bookmark ANYTHING. sorry all of these r like….. 10k and under. i DO read longer fic but i don’t have any kripke era longfics bookmarked & tbh i prefer short oneshots

season one gen

disclaimer because it’s unfortunately needed: NONE of these are w*ncest! they’re all completely tagged as gen and i did not read them with the intent of consuming ship content.

Coaster Park by fogsrollingin, 10.4k, G, gen

Coaster Park had been experiencing an unusually high frequency of technical difficulties. Dean wouldn't have pulled a shift treating nauseated, heat-stroked, or dehydrated park-goers for that if he could've helped it, but when 'technical difficulties' were accompanied by rumors of things moving and stopping on their own in front of the operators' eyes, Dean had to throw down.

No historical tragedies or disasters in the area, ectoplasm, or EMF. Dean's only lead was a battered-looking kid that'd been coming to the park every day since it'd all started.

really interesting au fic! slightly ‘it’s a terrible life’. dean winchester is a hunter/EMT and sam wesson is a college kid destined to die on a roller coaster ride.

two basic motivating forces by sahwen, 7.8k, T, gen

He can’t cry, it’s not allowed; even as a child he was hushed into silence, whether his tears were from a long car ride or a late night or a raging fever. It’s never been an option, it’s never been an available outlet, and it’s not about to start being one just because he’s having an emotional breakdown on the bathroom floor.

Sam isn't only afraid of clowns.

BIG emetophobia tw (both for graphic depictions of nausea/vomiting and for the fact that this fic is about sam suffering from emetophobia) for this one but it’s my favorite sickfic. portrays anxiety over getting sick really well and is a fascinating examination of the different ways that sam’s fear of loss of control can manifest itself. also has lovely brothers content <3

Let’s Start at the Very Beginning (Remix of Just as Easy as 123) by nwspaprtaxis, 4k, T, gen

Dean’s functionally illiterate and Sam’s determined to remedy it...

PLEASE READ THIS ONE god it’s so sweet. dean never learned how to read properly due to his nomadic childhood and sam teaches him how.

dean/cas

Broadway Musical by Griftings, 9k, M, m/m

This is the day that marked the Holy and Blessed Union of Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle.

The merging of prominent bloodlines is always a grand occurrence, but breeding pedigree hunter families like Winchester and Harvelle is something to be rejoiced. It is also something to be meticulously planned, which thankfully the Host is very good at.

Or, the romantic comedy where Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle are destined to get married, Castiel is given the task of playing matchmaker and fails terribly, the entire Heavenly Host becomes a sitcom audience, God warns against male pregnancy, and Jimmy Novak is incredibly unimpressed with angels in general.

somewhat of a fandom classic and the humor holds up wonderfully. a very silly fic completed with commentary from angel radio throughout the entire thing.

Sappiest Season by dollsome, 2.7k, G, m/m

In which Dean and Cas have to stop an evil Christmas tree (like you do), and it requires a little fake couple action.

hilarious little s5ish fic. one of the first i read when getting back into spn. i don’t want to spoil anything but this is my favorite pick me up and i still giggle randomly whenever i think about it

The (Mostly Accidental) Courtship of Dean Winchester by tuesday

Angelic marriage rites were never intended to go quite like this.

another fandom classic. ik this one is recced a lot but how could i NOT include it. dean and cas get married (mostly by accident) and they’re huge cunts about it

the one thing in the galaxy god didn't have his eyes on by prufrock, 2.4k, T, gen + m/m

“Wait,” Dean says. “Let me get this right. You can fly, right—you can teleport—but you can’t drive a car?”

or, after the events of S5E03 "Free to Be You and Me," Dean teaches Cas to drive. Cas finds it stressful

im always a sucker for a good ftbyam fic. also i can’t drive so. resonation

So Says The Sword by komodobits, 85k, E, m/m

The briefing was simple: ‘Stand guard over the Michael Sword until the battle is ready to commence. Await further instructions.’

Castiel doesn’t mind working security duty; he was briefed shortly after the initial salvation of the Sword from the pit, and again before taking up his position. He knows what to do. However, it’s easy to forget that the green room isn’t real. Time moves differently there, the space ever-changing to make a prison of mountains, cathedrals, salt flats, orchards, and whatever Castiel was led to believe about Heaven’s greatest weapon—Dean Winchester is something entirely unexpected.

NO introduction neede. i think everyone on spntumblr has read this already but still. if you haven’t then i am demanding that you read it NOW. tbh i’m just adding this one so that i have at least one long fic here 😭

the weight by @myaimistrue, 3.5k, T, gen + m/m

“Do you…” Bobby sighs. “Listen, Dean, do you have something you wanna tell me?”

It’s the conversational equivalent of being punched in the stomach.

Or, Dean works through some things with Bobby's help.

WHEN I SAW THE USERNAME I GASPED I HAD NO IDEA THIS WAS U. anyway i Love coming out fics idk why i just do. the world is ending and dean comes out to bobby

canticles by 2street2car, 10.3k, T, m/m

“But you know something? If I couldn’t get you laid, at least I gave you a good first date.”

feat: footsies at a Ruby Tuesday, stargazing, the recreation of an iconic "Dirty Dancing" scene (no, not that one—the other one), and practicing for When You're With A Girl.

another ftbyam fic that skepticalfrog (i believe?) recommended a while back. made me feel at least 28 new emotions

Epilogue by JayneL, 28k, E, m/m

Bobby is here, swearing somewhere above and behind him; and Dean is here, talking about 2014 like it's a foreign country; and Sam is here, and is not Lucifer. Which means-- Bobby is here, swearing somewhere above and behind him; and Dean is here, talking about 2014 like it's a foreign country; and Sam is here, and is not Lucifer. Which means--

Cas is no longer when he was. Lucifer sent him back.

Coda to 'The End'.

2014 cas gets sent back to 2009, feelings ensue etc. i don’t remember all the details of this one bc it’s been a while but it’s really good

bonus

currently reading

Fragile As We Lie by perilously, 11k, E, f/f

Dragging Bela Talbot out of perdition isn't so much a decision as it is a frantic choice based on gut instinct. Her soul is bright, if fractured, and Anna yearns to do good again after the perversion of free will that immediately preceded her death.

Bela's no ordinary human, though; she's prickly and damaged and beautiful, and Anna doesn't want to leave her side. So maybe they can figure out how to navigate post-resurrection, post-Apocalypse-that-wasn't Earth together.

#sorry i took a few days to answer this haha #asks #anon #fic recs

[stellocchia]

So, since we got that revival stream there are A LOT of takes that I’ve been seeing popping up regarding c!Wilbur. From straight up wrong takes like “he was worse then Dream” and “he manipulated Dream and made him a villain” to some more understandable but still very much wrong takes like: “Willbur was never a villain” and “Wilbur’s mental health spiral means we cannot identify him as a villain”

Since I’ve already spoken on other posts of mine about the first kind of statement, I want to focus on the second today. 

Let me preface this by saying that c!Wilbur is most definitely not an irredeemable character (a redemption arc for him is most definitely POSSIBLE, though we’ve gotten quite a lot of clues by now that that’s not the route cc!Wilbur seems to want to go down). I honestly think that the only TRULY irredeemable character in the smp ic c!Dream and that’s because of a mix between the level of harm he caused and his reaction and motivation for it. 

BUT he was a villain. A sympathetic one for sure, but a villain nonetheless. Being redeemable doesn’t make him any less of one, just like having understandable motivations or his harmful actions being a response to trauma or mental health related problems doesn’t make his actions and their consequences any less severe.

I mean I don’t see anyone out here having a problem with calling c!Jack a villain even if the harmful actions he tried to do or did are responses to isolation and trauma, why is Wilbur different when he’s caused much more harm? 

Same with Niki: we all recognized that her planning and trying to kill a child in cold blood was most definitely villanous even with her being extremely sympathetic. And, once again, she suffered from similar conditions to those Wilbur was in: a lack of a system of support, loosing her country, isolation in a base underground and we can add loosing a dear friend to that for her. So why don’t we give her a pass for everything? Why isn’t (well, wasn’t, she seems to be better off now that she is with the syndacate) she JUST a tragic charact but ALSO a villainous one?

Well it all comes down to the goal and the impact of someone’s actions. While the declining mental health of a character is important to keep in mind when deciding if they’re sympathetic and to understand what motivate their actions, it’s irrelevant to establish if they’re a villain. 

Let’s take c!Jack again as an example: he griefed multiple buildings trying to pit Dream and Tommy against each other, pre Tommy’s exile, and cause an all out war between them because Tommy’s actions had caused (in Jack’s mind of course, as what Dream did is entirely Dream’s responsability and in no way the fault of Tommy) Dream to burn down part of Manifold Land. He was angry at both of them in an understandable way, but his goals and actions were both immoral. And his actions didn’t cause harm ONLY because Tommy had already been exiled, otherwise they could have been taken by Dream as a reason to exile him either way later on. 

Now, for another example, c!Quackity: his announced goal with him torturing c!Dream is taking away the power that grants him the ability to harm others while still within Pandor’a Vault. But, truth be told, he IS mostly doing it for selfish reasons, either be it because he lost a bet to Schlatt or because this IS part of the bet it’s still a completely callous reason for torturing someone. The person he is harming is undeniably a villain who’s hurt a lot of people, but that’s irrelevant when judging the morality of Quackity’s action. 

Now let’s talk about Wilbur’s actions:

- He abused and manipulated Tommy, there is no way around it. He was extremely verbally abusive towards him. He tried to isolate him from everyone else and he tried to control Tommy’s emotional responses. He’s still doing that as a matter of fact by straight up dismissing any emotional response Tommy has that doesn’t suit him (by, for example, ignoring his clear signs of dicomfort back during their conversation post season 2 finale and by ignoring and making fun of his panic attack in their discussion in the afterlife). We know this caused long term trauma for Tommy causing him to have night terrorse about him and being terrified of ever becoming anything like Wilbur. Trying to find a way to avoid Wilbur’s path was basically Tommy’s whole arc in season 2. 

- He retained vital informations from Techno (retaining information from him about his allies, and from his allies about him). This one is a bit more up for discussion to be honest, but Ive seen quite a few people make the point that Wilbur made sure that the info he gave Techno was the only one he had about Pogtopia’s intetions. He also was the only one who knew about Techno’s withers and about his anarchists ideals and he never revealed them to ther allies, which definitely helped in causing the rift later on.

- He mistreated Tubbo quite a lot as well (the whole scene at the festival is just painful). But, basically, he had him spy for them and basically treated him as a pawn. He described him, to his face, as just a “yes man” with no free will of his own. Then he used his death just to bring forth discord and violence between his allies. He also pushed on him all the pressure to decide on wether to blow up the country or not. 

- He kept keeping L’Manburg hostage to his allies, increasing the already incredible pressure on them immensely. When Schlatt said he moved the tnt to Pogtopia he started doing the same with that place by constantly clicking all the random buttons while they were all trying to plan. That is blackmail my dudes. Blackmail done to an extreme.

- There is the whole pit scene that deserves a point on it’s own where he literally kept spurring on both Techno and Tommy (all the while blatantly putting down Tommy in an extremely manipulative way) to beat each other to death (albeit non-canonically). Re-watch that one and pay close attention to him if you have any doubt about him being abusive towards Tommy.

- And, for last, he also did blow up L’Manburg and he had fully intended to do it also as a last slight towards Tommy, just to add on to how much of a d*ck he was to him.

It’s true that he needed help and that he had spirald. He had become self-destructive and paranoid, but that DOESN’T erase what he has done, nor what that paint him as. His actions were all done with the spcific goal of being harmful to others and have all had long lasting effects. He hurt A LOT of people. He is, by all intents and purposes, a villain. 

Also I want to add that if they do give him a redemtion arc it will have to be done carefully to be done well. And also none of the people he hurt with his actions should be forced to forgive him. As a matter of fact I’ll go further and say that Tommy in particular shouldn’t even be forced to TALK to him as he has already expressed extreme concern about ending up being manipulated again. No matter what he went through and what his mental state was, none of his victims owe him any understanding either.

#c!wilbur critical #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #jack manifold #niachu #quackity #dream smp #/rp #tw manipulation #tw abuse #tw torture #character analysis #my post #I've been wanting to make a post about c!wilbur for quite a while now #because there seem to be recently way too many takes that are a bit too lenient towards him #so here it is! #long post

[franniebanana]

CQL Rewatch - Ep 21

Note: I will be critical of Jiang Cheng in these posts. If you can’t handle that, please feel free to scroll on.

I really like this hug. I mean, if you've been reading these from the beginning, you know how much I love wangxian, but I'm really glad that Wei Ying's first actual hug after returning from the Burial Mounds is with Jiang Yanli. I'm not counting the hug with Jiang Cheng, because Wei Ying didn't hug him back. That hug was thrust upon him and he did not reciprocate. This reunion is very sweet, and tear-filled, and if I hadn't been up since 3 am, I might be feeling enough to shed a tear, myself. That being said, it's hilarious how they keep showing Jiang Cheng in the middle, looking awkward as he tries to balance joy and sadness. I get what the director had in mind, but it just looks weird lol.

But this part is also super sad, because Wei Ying again makes a promise he can't keep: that the three of them will be together forever. Now, I realize that if you hadn't read the novel or weren't familiar with the story, you should already know from the first two episodes that things do not turn out well for the three of them. However, if you're like me and have the memory of a goldfish, you probably didn't realize who everyone was in the first two episodes and even if you did, you've already forgotten long ago that Jiang Cheng was pissy and angry around Wei Wuxian and that Wei Wuxian's inner monologue reveals to us that JIang Yanli is dead. All that being said, his line about staying together forever hits a lot differently when you're very aware of how the story turns out, because Jiang Yanli dies, Jiang Cheng grows to hate Wei Wuxian more and more every day, and Wei Wuxian, of course, defects to save the Wens from slaughter. I think "let's stay together forever" is something you say and mean, but something that you know can't ever truly be. I think Jiang Yanli is old and wise enough to know that she will eventually marry and leave Lotus Pier, even though she will resist it for a while. The rest is uncertain, but I think at this point, Wei Wuxian really does believe and want to stay with the Yunmeng siblings and to stay at Jiang Cheng's side as he leads the Yunmeng Jiang Sect.

I will never not be heartbroken by this scene--even knowing how everything turns out--by how Lan Wangji looks at Wei Wuxian, how if things had been different in Yiling, he would have gone into that room and greeted him, how Wei Wuxian would have smiled at him and beckoned him inside, how they would have sat and Wei Wuxian would have talked Lan Wangji's ear off, like old friends. It's just so upsetting to me, and I can't ever shake that feeling in the pit of my stomach. I know what happens, but these two episodes, until they reconcile, really get to me. It's a horrible feeling when you want to help someone, but they don't see it as helping, and they only get upset with you. I deal with that on an almost daily basis, and I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone. I really identify with Lan Wangji here, and I think that's why I get such a visceral reaction to seeing him like this.

I don't know if I've said this, but Lan Wangji is my favorite character in CQL and in every adaptation of this story. He is kind of my perfect character--he checks off all the boxes: one-sided love, pining, standing by the main character no matter what, practically abandoning his own family for the person he loves. I love that he has an almost child-like innocence, but he's still very wise; he's smart; he's strong; he has a strict moral code and he sticks to it without fail, even if it means going against his friends and family; he's a loner, but he loves deeply. When I first started watching the donghua and reading the novel, I liked Wei Wuxian the best, and he's still my second favorite character, but Lan Wangji has stolen my heart.

Of course, Wei Wuxian goes to this awkward dinner party, after spending three months around ghosts (and then killing a shit-ton of Wen soldiers), and all he can think about is that empty seat behind him, the one where Lan Wangji should be sitting. It's interesting how the Yunmeng siblings each react: Jiang Yanli starts to become concerned and commits it to memory. She's probably wondering why Lan Wangji isn't there, and then seeing how Wei Wuxian wistfully stares at the empty seat, she finds it even more unsettling. Jiang Cheng just seems embarrassed by Wei Wuxian here and his motivation is to get Wei Wuxian back on track so he doesn't make fools of the Yunmeng Jiang Sect in front of the other leaders. He obviously knows what happened between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji, and I don't think he's bothered by it at all. He doesn't seem to care whether they're friends or not, and I'd say that even at this point, he'd prefer if Lan Wangji stayed out of Wei Wuxian's life altogether. He knows how close they were, and I think he also knows that Wei Wuxian would choose Lan Wangji over him if given that ultimatum. With Lan Wangji out of the picture, Jiang Cheng gets to maintain more control over Wei Wuxian than he otherwise would. Even later on at Lotus Pier, he wants Wei Wuxian around, helping him, being his right-hand man. He doesn't want him wandering around the city or galavanting off with other cultivators. Granted Wei Wuxian was drinking at the time, but I don't think that invalidates my point that Jiang Cheng wants Wei Wuxian to stay in line and stay at his side where he can control him. You know, because he sees the relationship (as Wei Wuxian suggested) as the same as their two fathers: where Wei Wuxian is in a subservient role to Jiang Cheng. Mind you, that's different from seeing him as a brother, and I think, while there's some of that mixed into his other feelings, it's a very small portion.

No screenshot, but the following scene, after Wei Wuxian leaves the dinner party, Jiang Cheng follows him out. And even here, he asks what's wrong--asks if he's upset because of Lan Wangji--but then scoffs at how that could really be what's bothering him. He says something like, "Why did you come here just to be disliked by him?" I think while he gets that they have a close bond, he doesn't really understand the depth of the relationship. He's jealous of Lan Wangji, but doesn't fully understand why. Ultimately, I think Jiang Cheng, because of his parents and the way he was raised, really doesn't understand what it's like to have a good relationship with anyone. And this ignorance isn't his fault--he's a product of his parents and surroundings, and no one, including himself, has ever tried to fix this. So, without being able to really understand how relationships work, he scoffs at how Wei Wuxian could still be upset over what happened with Lan Wangji. Jiang Cheng essentially gave Wei Wuxian what he wanted in that moment, which was unconditional support to carry out his revenge, and yet Wei Wuxian is hung up on Lan Wangji not being supportive there, and in fact being in opposition to him. Jiang Cheng doesn't even really have friends, so he thinks Wei Wuxian should just get over Lan Wangji and move on with his life, but it's not that simple. Lan Wangji isn't just an acquaintance, he's not just someone that Wei Wuxian partnered up with to fight a battle or carry out a mission--he's a soulmate, a kindred spirit (if you want to go down a less romantic route).

I rarely can say anything bad about Jiang Yanli (except how she's almost always making soup), and here's another example: Chenqing. She's so far the only one who supports Wei Wuxian having a first class spiritual tool. She immediately shows interest in the flute, even encourages him to give it a name. Lan Wangji immediately sees the flute as something bad, while she's completely supportive. And this is really what Wei Wuxian needs right now, and I love her for being there. She's also about the only person he will genuinely smile around. He gives everyone else forced or fake smiles, but not Yanli. At this moment, I think he only wants to be with her, and I can't really blame him when everyone else is either opposing him or just wanting something out of him. She really is coming from a place of sympathy and comfort that's different from how the others are handling things. Lan Wangji wants to help, yes, but he tries to force it.

Imagine being in this room, listening to Jin Zixun (I'm not even sure if that's his name lol) trash talk Wei Wuxian, wanting to say something in his defense, but being unable to, not just because it's not your place to do so, but also because you're not even sure if you can defend him anymore. I think Jiang Cheng is struggling with the same. He stands up to Jin Zixun, finally getting him to shut up by saying that it's a domestic affair for the Jiang Clan and none of his fucking business, but Jiang Cheng also struggles to find excuses for Wei Wuxian. And that would certainly be difficult, because Wei Wuxian is somewhat like a stranger now. He's similar, but he's not the same Wei Wuxian that Jiang Cheng grew up with. He's really a shadow of his former self. But Lan Wangji has the added bonus of not being able to speak on his behalf because he's not even in the same clan--who is he to defend Wei Wuxian? He can't even stand with the others at the table (can't or won't, I'm not sure), so he certainly can't speak to Wei Wuxian's honor in front of all the other leaders. I'm sure the conversation back in Yiling is still running through his mind: this is a Jiang Clan affair--and to have that repeated again to someone else. That very much puts Lan Wangji in the "other" position. He's not in Wei Wuxian's clan, therefore, it's none of his business. He should care about him. He shouldn't try to protect him. He shouldn't try to guide him. But the problem is he still cares deeply about Wei Wuxian, and he wants to help him and protect him and guide him.

These scenes are always hard to watch for me (thank god for the special edition cut). It's really hard to watch the clans doing to the Wens what the Wens have done to the other clans. As if war wasn't already terrible enough, you also have what happens to the prisoners of war. In this case, Wen Qing's sect are all healers and have little to do with the war that the rest of the Wen Clan was waging on the other cultivation clans. However, they are still treated as enemies and imprisoned. It's difficult to watch the other clans, who you want to root for, making the same mistakes and transgressions as the Wens, who we are supposed to look at as the proper enemies in the story.

As we've seen a few times in this episode already, Wei Wuxian is having trouble controlling all the negative energy that's surging through him and the Yin iron, and on some of those occasions, he's touched his old wound. As he does this here, everyone looks at him, but he just looks at Lan Wangji. This is the person he cares most about in this room, the person whose heart his closest to his. I have nothing profound to say--I just like it.

And of course Lan Wangji looks right back at him. He knows Wei Wuxian best, even better than his own "brother", Jiang Cheng. He knows what happened in Xuanwu Cave, he saw the effect the sword had on him. I feel like each time they exchange glances, they are both crying out to each other, but Wei Wuxian is too stubborn to ask for help and Lan Wangji doesn't want to force the issue and strain their relationship further.

The way Lan Wangji hesitates here before saying, "I don't know," kills me. To him, it's just further proof of how Wei Wuxian is getting farther and farther from him, how the chasm between them just keeps growing. He's upset here. He doesn't know what to do. He doesn't want to force Wei Wuxian to do anything--that's against his clan rules, but more importantly, against his own ethics--yet he doesn't want to stand by and do nothing while his friend destroys himself. I think we see Lan Wangji as a character who always knows what to do, someone who always knows the right path, but here we see how that's not true at all. This is a man who is very smart, very clever, but who is also unsure of himself. He's struggling with what's right and wrong. And he consults his brother here, hoping to get a clear answer, so that he'll know what to do next, but he gets nothing of the sort.

It would have been easier for Lan Wangji if his brother has simply said, "Wei Wuxian is wrong and an enemy," but of course he's more wise than that. Nothing is black and whit, and humans cannot be judged for what's on the surface. You have to look deep inside a person, know their intentions, and then you can judge if they are doing what's right or wrong. The problem is Lan Wangji doesn't know Wei Wuxian's intentions. Months ago, he know Wei Wuxian wanted to defend the weak, protect people who couldn't protect themselves, and live by such a just moral code. But now Wei Wuxian seems like a stranger, has murdered many, many people, and has taken cruel revenge upon Wen Chao and Wang Lingjao.

What I've noticed in this episode is that Wei Wuxian will look at Lan Wangji, but he always averts his eyes fairly quickly. It's as if he's afraid if they make eye contact for too long, he'll be letting Lan Wangji in, which he does not want to do under any circumstances. Letting Lan Wangji in means admitting what's going on as well as opening up Lan Wangji to danger. Wei Wuxian does not want anyone else getting hurt or dying because of him, so it's better to reject everyone and focus on his own clan.

Honey, I'd walk away too. It's hard to tell if Lan Wangji is about to cry or about to punch Wei Wuxian in the mouth--either one would have been excellent, but I'm leaning towards the latter. Lan Wangji had to answer Jiang Yanli. She met him by chance, but it was she who initiated the conversation. Of course, angst rules being what they are, we had to have a misunderstanding a la Wei Wuxian walking into the conversation midway and making the asinine assumption that Lan Wangji was just breaking his confidence by telling her EVERYTHING. Of course, anyone who knows Lan Wangji knows he'd never do such a thing. But when Wei Wuxian's shijie comes to him, voicing her concern and asking about him, he has no choice but to empathize with her and tell her what he knows.

I really like this little exchange. Reliving the fight on the rooftop, before they were acquainted, before they were friends--before Lan Wangji fell for him. This time when he attacks, it's not about malice, it's not about breaking the rules and bringing liquor into the Cloud Recesses--it's a man, looking at the one he loves, scared out of his mind, worried that that man is going to destroy his mind and body, using a taboo cultivation method. This fight is a love letter, as far as I'm concerned. It's an act of desperation.

Also I fucking love that around four or five people have asked Wei Wuxian where Suibian is, and each time he makes up a lie: he forgot it, he isn't in the mood, he didn't bother to bring it. But when Lan Wangji asks him, he doesn't respond. He doesn't lie, he doesn't laugh it off--whatever he does, Lan Wangji will know that he's lying, and Wei Wuxian knows that.

Other episodes: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | Or just check out the #CQL Rewatch hashtag

#wangxian #wei wuxian #lan wangji #cql #the untamed #jiang cheng #jiang yanli #mdzs #mo dao zu shi #wwx #lwj #ep 21 #cql rewatch

[omegasshyghuleh6661ghosts]

Heyo! Can you do some Headcanons for Rey and Eddie fighting over reader before deciding to be in a poly relationship? Thanks

Absolutely, lovely! 🖤 I don't write a lot of headcanons, but I'll try my best. The timeline for this starts in 1993, so the timing of some events has been changed. Also, due to post limits, there will be a part two!

- You've been friends with Rey and Eddie for years, though you've been friends with Eddie for longer.

- You meet Eddie while training with Dusty and Dustin Rhodes. You'd just taken a break from training with Dustin and were sitting on a bench when he walked up to you, smirking and mischief filling his eyes.

- "Eddie Guerrero, and you are absolutely gorgeous, mamacita. Qué tendría que pasar para que un tipo como yo obtenga tu número?"

- You couldn't help but laugh at his brazen introduction, introducing yourself as well and saying that after an introduction like the one he gave, there wasn't really any reason to not give him your number.

- You two joke around, becoming close friends quickly, and becoming almost inseparable soon after.

- A few months later, you meet Rey at an event you were wrestling at, walking up to the shy man and introducing yourself.

- Though he won't admit it, Rey develops feelings for you fairly early on. Later in life, he tells you and Eddie that he couldn't help it. No matter what you did in the ring, how hated you could be sometimes when you were a heel, outside the ring you're the epitome of everything good in the world. Plus, it doesn't hurt that you're pretty good looking.

- It took a while for him to do this, but once he warmed up to you and was comfortable enough... Rey unmasked for you, only wearing it when dealing with the public.

- Once the three of you manage to get into the same companies, there's a lot less dull moments in your life.

- The three of you work out, spar, ride together and room together, rarely being apart from one another even if one of you is injured. If one of you leaves a company, the other two leave as well.

- Rey and Eddie take turns figuring out who gets to share the bed with you while you're on the road.

- On the 'bad' nights, it leads to you threatening to sleep on the couch or room with someone else.

- "You two are like an old married couple, and if you don't work your issues out soon I'm going to room with Elizabeth or Sherri for the night."

- On 'normal' nights, two of you take the bed. Neither of them get into bed until you've chosen a side to sleep on. Whoever isn't in bed either sleeps on the couch or on the floor beside you. When one of you remembers to book dual beds, whoever doesn't end up sharing the bed with you will sleep in the extra bed.

- On 'good' nights, however, it leads to the three of you curled up with one another. Eddie and Rey take turns curling up behind you.

- When Eddie and you share the bed, he asks if you'd like to curl up with him even though you've told him time and time again that he doesn't have to ask. You won't ever turn down falling asleep while curled up with your favorite guys. Once he has explicit permission, he'll either curl up behind you with an arm draped around your waist while his free arm rests under your head/neck area or lay on his back so that you can curl into his side. During the latter situation, he'll wrap his arms around you and quietly vow to you that no nightmares will come to you while he's around before humming songs to you as you drift off.

- When Rey and you share the bed, he also asks for explicit permission to cuddle up with you. He'll ask if you want to be cuddled, curl into his side, or do the cuddling. Either way, he's happy to do whatever it takes to make you happy and ease you into restful sleep. If he cuddles you, he wraps an arm around you and runs the fingers of his free hand through your hair to help lull you to sleep. During side cuddles, one arm is wrapped around you while the other rests under the pillow behind his head. If he's the one being cuddled, your arm is usually wrapped around his waist or stomach. During the rare occasions it's not, your arm is draped over his with your hand touching his chest.

- They're equally protective over you, but show it differently.

- Rey will get close to you and glare at people who make you uncomfortable or try to cross a line, only getting vocal when he absolutely needs to. He knows you can hold your own, but wants to be there for you anyway.

- Eddie isn't afraid to get vocal from the get go. If someone's upset you or wronged you somehow, he's absolutely going to call them out for it while slinging an arm around you.

- He'd never say it in front of you, but Eddie's threatened to make people's lives hell if they cross a line with you. Especially if he knows that he has a match against the person.

- Sometimes Eddie gets a little too handsy with you, Rey glaring at him when he realizes what's happening. This gets a little worse when you and Eddie get put into romantic storylines and have to ham it up in front of the camera.

- Eddie gets the same way when you and Rey are paired together, sometimes complaining to the higher-ups when he feels like things have gone too far.

- When you ride together, Rey and Eddie take turns driving so you can rest as much as possible. Whoever isn't driving will take the backseat, stretching out with their head facing you so that they can see all of your expressions during the long conversations.

- Rey finds ways to turn the backseat into a bed for you if you're tired and can't stop at a hotel yet.

- They realize their feelings for you at different times, though neither of them say anything about it because they don't want to lose you or each other.

- The first time you have clothes removed during a show, both of them freeze up and have to distract themselves. You're wearing nothing but a thong and your heels, your dress having been thrown aside to distract your boys' opponents. None of the men in the ring can keep their eyes off of you, Eddie and Rey barely managing to get their win before you wrap up and put on a bit of a show as you make your way backstage. Rey briefly has a moment where he realizes he should get you backstage quicker, but Eddie's already halfway there.

- Eddie accidentally walks into your shared locker room, groaning under his breath at the view he gets. While he understands that it isn't helping the tightness of his gear, he doesn't mind looking for just a moment more. You peek back at him while you try to find the shirt you'd packed in your extra set of clothes, unable to hide your smirk. Rey walks up behind Eddie, moving to his side as you turn to face them both. He covers his eyes, stammering out an apology as he blindly moves to the shower, struggling to ignore the physical reaction he has to the sight of you. Eddie closes the door, jokingly flirting with you as Rey heads off to the shower. You both laugh and flirt, you teasing Rey a bit after you get fully changed.

- "Hey, Rey, want some help in there?" You call to him, shaking your head slightly at the strangled no that escapes him.

- Rey pulls Eddie aside one night before a show, telling him that they need to have a serious talk. He admits his feelings for you, Eddie following suit and spilling everything to Rey.

- Rey gives Eddie a gentle nudge, telling him that he should tell you how he feels. He won't admit it until years later, when you're all taking time off after the birth of Dominik, but this is one of the hardest moments in his life. His heart feels like it's dropped to the pit of his stomach, he fights to keep his breath from catching in his throat, and the only thought running through his head is that this is the moment he loses his entire world.

- Eddie is a nervous wreck when he tells Rey how he feels about you, and doesn't understand how Rey can so calmly say that he should tell you how he feels after coming clean and saying that he has the same feelings for you.

- He turns Rey down, saying that he couldn't do something like that. It'd mean potentially ruining your friendship and it'd hurt Rey. He makes it explicitly clear that he doesn't want to hurt either of you.

- They talk more, deciding that either they were going to come clean to you at the same time or hint at it until you bring it up.

- You have a title match that night against Joanie and they're both ringside, cheering you on and hyping the crowd up for you. You win, and they rush into the ring to congratulate you. Rey is the first to hug you, Eddie's arms wrapping around you both. Soon enough, you break apart and Joanie congratulates you before Eddie lifts you up onto his shoulders.

- They take you out after the show to celebrate your win, treating you to a fancy dinner and roses.

- "You're holding the belt now, querida. Of course we're going to celebrate that with a dinner worthy of champions!"

- Rey almost confesses his feelings for you later on in the night.

- Weeks go by and they drop little hints over time, but still don't say anything about it.

- The three of you have a day off, and they decide to finally come clean to you. They're both nervous about it but spill everything, including why they acted the way they did. Rey sits on the floor of your hotel room and faces you and Eddie, Eddie laying on his side so that he can face you and Rey at the same time.

- You've noticed their hints, so were kind of expecting a conversation like this to happen soon, but it still catches you a bit off guard.

- They both make it perfectly clear that they're not going to pressure you into anything, and just want to be on the same page as you.

- At one point during the conversation, you look between the two of them and mention the idea that changes your lives forever.

- "None of us have to choose between one or the other. I feel the same as both of you, but there's nothing that says we have to be unhappy for the sake of another. My feelings for you both are indescribable, and I don't think I could bear to lose either of you. Why not just forge our own path in life and be together?"

- Eddie's eyes go wide for a moment before he looks to Rey, the smaller man doing the same before both of them look at you and ask simultaneously to repeat what you said so that they can process it.

- "I love you, Eddie. I also love you, Rey. I don't want to lie, don't want to have to choose and hurt one of you... I want to be with you both."

- You all agree to at least try it, Rey moving to sit next to you. Eddie takes one of your hands, Rey taking the other.

- Your first kiss with both of them was that night.

- Your relationship is a very relaxed and organic one, but you do go through the normal ups and downs of any relationship.

- Eddie and Rey plan date nights for you. Two for Rey, two for Eddie, and two group date nights.

- They remain equally protective over you, but the jealousy fades away pretty quickly. It only returns when you end up in a storyline with a different wrestler.

- Chavo is the first person to realize the three of you are together, and is extremely supportive.

- After a few months into dating and some serious talks, the three of you buy a house and move in together.

- For the first year or so of your relationship, Eddie and Rey get their families together for the holidays with you that way nobody feels left out.

- You keep your relationship pretty private, but not to the extent where you hide any trace of it. Your families know, friends know, and most of your coworkers know. None of you say anything to the McMahons, knowing that Vince would most likely try to punish you during televised shows.

- You get married to them in Vegas in 1994, becoming Mrs. Y/N Guerrero-Gutiérrez. It's a small ceremony, Dusty Rhodes, Chavo, and Rey senior are the only ones there. You have celebrations with Eddie and Rey's families after enjoying some time to yourselves.

- Your anniversary and birthdays are always a massive deal to Rey and Eddie. They spoil you every year, and you spoil them in return.

- The three of you would love to have children, so you ask to transition to being Eddie and Rey's manager. Heyman agrees and you become their manager soon after. You stay on the road with your boys but have less matches.

- During the early and mid points in your pregnancy, you still show up to manage your boys. You travel with them and room with them as usual, though you take things a lot easier than you did before.

- The boys take time off and set up a nursery, not letting you see it until it's completed.

- Eddie and Rey both ask to be written off air with injuries leading up to the birth of your daughter Shaul.

- When Shaul is born, Eddie and Rey are at your side in the hospital. Rey on your left side and Eddie on your right. Both are wrapped around your little girl's finger fairly quickly, both explaining to the nurses and doctor that they are both your legal husbands and both need to be on her birth certificate.

- You discuss Eddie wanting to leave ECW, eventually deciding that he would go to WCW first, then you and Rey would join him the following year.

- They're both doting fathers, taking care of you and Shaul. Neither let you do anything major until you're fully healed, letting you get as much rest as possible.

- The three of you ask Chavo and your friend Mark, also known as The Undertaker, to be her godfathers without a second thought.

- Once you're healed and feel well enough to, you return to work and ease your way back into matches. Your mentor and Shaul's self-appointed grandpa, Dusty Rhodes, watches over her while you're out at ringside during your boys' matches or during promos.

- Being wrestlers and being on the road a lot of the time means that some of the major milestones happen on the road or at work. The four of you are in a hotel room with Chavo, Chris Benoit, Kevin Nash, Jeff Jarrett, Sean Waltman, Scott Hall and Dusty Rhodes when Shaul says her first word.

- You're mid-conversation with Nash and Dusty, Kevin holding her as she looks at Rey and strains against Kevin's arm. Rey asks what she wants, thinking that she just wanted to be set down. Instead, what he gets is your daughter saying the word Papa after a few tries. Rey excitedly scoops her up from Kevin's lap, carefully cradling her to his chest as he murmurs words of encouragement to her. You and Eddie are both excited and proud of her for saying her first word, but are also both a little playfully jealous that her first word was calling Rey Papa.

- A few months later, she takes her first steps in the middle of the ring during your pre-show warmups with Rey and Eddie. You'd been in the middle of stretches against the ropes, Eddie and Rey sitting nearby with their legs stretched out on the mat. Shaul shakily finds her feet after apparently deciding that her Papa and Dada weren't enough to keep her attention, spotting you and taking a few unsteady steps toward you. You stayed in place, happily encouraging her to keep going as your husbands did the same. She slowly made her way to you, giggling and squealing happily when you picked her up.

- Your second daughter, Sherilyn, is born a year later.

- The three of you ask your friends Chris, Dean, and Dustin, better known as Chris Benoit, Dean Malenko and Dustin Rhodes to be her godfathers.

- You retire from in-ring action, strictly being a manager for your boys.

- Dominik is born two years later.

- The three of you ask Jeff Jarrett, Sean Waltman, and Paul Wight to be his godfathers. You also ask Jacqueline to be his godmother.

- You raise your kids 50% on the road and 50% at home when they're old enough for school.

- When Rey is forced to unmask in a match against Kevin and Scott, you're just as hurt as Rey. You're furious for allowing something like that to happen, but don't take it out on your friends. Instead, you have a meeting with Eric Bischoff and the booking agents behind Eddie and Rey's backs. During that meeting, you yell at everyone and ask them if they realize how important a mask is to a luchador. You then tell them that they messed up by doing that to Rey, instead of booking some other finish so that Rey could keep his mask and the fans would be happy. Way after the fact, you tell Rey and Eddie about this meeting. They're both grateful, especially Rey, but also tell you that you didn't have to do that.

- You continue being the manager for Rey and Eddie until 2000 when Eddie jumped to the WWF. You and Eddie end up separating, and you stayed with Rey until he returned to the independent circuit. You stay at home with your kids during this time, your daughter Aalyah being born later in 2001.

- You checked in to see how Eddie was doing every now and again during your seperation, learning that he was released from the WWF a few months after Aalyah was born.

- You and Rey ask the Hardys, Rob Van Dam (Rob Szatkowski), Road Dogg (Brian James), and Billy Gunn (Monty Sopp) to be her godfathers, and Chyna (Joanie Laurer) and Torrie Wilson to be her godmothers.

- Eddie returned to the WWF in 2002, you and Rey making your debut not long after. Eddie's daughter Kaylie is born during this year.

- Eddie and you reconcile after he and Kaylie's mother break up, staying together until Eddie's passing.

- The three of you renew your vows on your ten year anniversary in 2004, your children celebrating with you and your family.

- The three of you celebrate Eddie's four-year sobriety, vowing to each other that none of you will ever go back to that place in your lives.

- You and Rey were booked in a different hotel as Eddie the night he passed. He was staying at a hotel with Chavo so that they could catch a flight from Phoenix to Minneapolis for a taping, while you and Rey were in California after a mid-week trip to see your in-laws and do some press for the European tour that was coming up. Eddie however, found the upside to it. When you talked the night before he passed, he joked about how you and Rey could finally sleep without feeling like you're sleeping in a furnace. You promised to room together the next night after the Smackdown and Raw tapings. You and Rey tell Eddie that you'll see him on the plane to head to the tapings, as you and Rey had a connection flight that Eddie would board, but end up changing your flight to catch a red-eye to Phoenix so that you can all travel together. You take the flight with Rey, figuring Eddie would be happy to see you early. Instead, when you touch down and enter the airport one of the truck drivers for the crew greet you and ask if you'd heard about Eddie. You're both confused and tell him no, asking what happened to him. The man tells you that Eddie had just passed away, you and Rey both telling him no again. Nerves and shock course through your system as you grab your bags, Rey grabbing his and clutching your hand. You think that this is some kind of sick joke, but stay quiet on the ride to the hotel. You arrive, heading up to Eddie's room as quickly as possible. You're greeted with the sight of your team doctor in front of Eddie's room, and your hand slips from Rey's. You don't say a word, rushing into the room and stopping on a dime. Chavo is there holding Eddie. You don't register dropping to your knees next to them, the soul-wrenching sobs that escape you, Chavo passing Eddie to you, or Rey kneeling at your side as Chavo's shock begins to wear off and he breaks down. Your thoughts are muddy. Your chest feels uncomfortably tight, and your sobs wrack your entire body. You don't even feel Rey's arm around you as he breaks down.

- In a few moments of clarity you vaguely remember Chavo sitting on the bed and answering the phone, saying something to Rey about Benoit being downstairs. At some point after Eddie's taken away, Vince, Paul, and Michael show up. Vince asks what the three of you want to do about the show, Chavo and Rey making the decision to go on with it as you're too distraught to say anything.

- Rey and Chavo call your families to tell them what happened, your thoughts settling on your kids. You manage to tell Rey that either you or him needs to call them to break the news. Rey calls as he holds you in his arms, doing a lot of the talking.

- The next few hours are a blur. You, Rey, Chavo and Chris travel to the arena for the taping, Eddie's things with yours and Rey's at the hotel. Rey's and Chavo's arms wrap around your waist as you walk into the building, your wrestling family surrounding you and hugging you throughout the day before the start of the show. Eventually you manage to find enough strength to pull yourself together mentally and emotionally before the show. You change into the gear you would've worn with Eddie tonight, walking out to the ramp to stand front and center with your family. Rey, Benoit, Chavo, Malenko and Hunter stand at your sides, others behind you resting a hand on your shoulder or back. A gesture of silent reassurance and solidarity. There wasn't a dry eye in the room as Vince addressed the crowd, chants rising from the crowd of his name and "Thank you Eddie!" echo throughout the arena. The ten bell salute is given, and in this moment it feels like your heart is sinking with each ring. There are a few moments of silence before a tribute video is played, set to Johnny Cash's cover of Hurt.

- Once the roster headed backstage, Eddie's closest friends surrounded you in a group hug. Rey stayed by your side, no one saying a word. You all just stood there together, allowing each other to let everything out. Members of your work family are asked if they'd like to talk about Eddie, many accepting. Still, your closest friends are at your side for the time being. Show is the first one to leave your group, Kane walking back out to Gorilla with him for the first match of the night. Nitro, Mercury and Melina follow soon after. Your group finds a monitor to crowd around, still hugging one another and taking comfort in the company as you watch the screen. Show and Kane win the match, rejoining you to watch the rest of the show. Tonight, wins and losses mean nothing.

- There were many tears shed, but you all put on the best possible show for him. Many clips of Eddie are played between interviews and matches, some bringing a little bit of laughter in to break up the solemnity.

- You watch Kurt and Shelton's match in silence, tearing up once again as Shawn's interview plays. Instinctively, you hold Chavo a little closer during the montage of him and Eddie. He holds you close, especially when you start to break down for what feels like the millionth time today. For the first time since this morning, Rey isn't the one to hold you when Chavo leaves. Dusty is. He wraps you up in his arms tight and comforts you as he'd comfort his own children.

- When Chavo comes back, he sits next to Rey with his hand resting on top of yours.

- Shawn and Rey have a match next, both of them hugging you tight and giving you comforting words before asking if you'd like to join them at ringside. You accept, drying your tears and walking out with Rey. Both of them wear "I'm your papi" shirts and arm bands with Eddie's initials on it, and it brings a small smile to your face. Rey dances like Eddie, finally managing to make you laugh for the first time all day. Members of the crowd pat your back throughout the match, showing the overwhelming support for your family that you'd always appreciated, more so now than ever.

- Rey beats Shawn, taking a few moments for himself before helping Shawn up. They have a few moments of their own in the ring, undoubtedly comforting one another and making sure they're both okay before they slip out of the ring and head over toward you. They're both sore and a little beat up but check in on you to make sure you were okay. Rey takes your hand in his, rubbing his thumb over the back of yours as Shawn wraps an arm around your waist before you walk backstage and find your monitor again.

- Dave's the next to be interviewed, and you know he regrets not knowing Eddie better. It's hard to not feel that way.

- The women's battle royal takes place next, and while you're supportive of the girls you don't really have the heart to watch. You take the time to talk with your family and share some memories. Rey tells the story of how your relationship started, and how Eddie was the one who finally decided that they should come clean to you.

- You tell the story of how you and Eddie found out that you were pregnant with Shaul, Rey laughing when you mention that Eddie had jokingly begged the test to show the results faster because he was so excited about possibly becoming a father.

- "We were all in triple A at the time, on the road, and staying at this little motel somewhere. Rey was grabbing dinner for the night and some stuff from the drug store just in case I was actually sick. I had been feeling a little under the weather for a while so I took a test, out of curiosity and just to be on the safe side of things. When he realized I'd taken one, you could see things start to click in his head. He jumped off of the bed and started rambling off every thought in his head, half in English and half in Spanish... He was so excited about being a dad, and he knew Rey would be too. By the time the results showed, he'd already planned out how he and Rey were gonna train our little champ."

- Rey laughed for the first time that day, adding that Eddie was like that with all of your kids and was so excited when the three of you first had the discussion of wanting to start trying for a baby.

- The Battle Royal ends, Melina winning. Rey's asked to speak about Eddie and he does so, heading off before the end of the women's match. You prepared for whatever he was about to say, but that didn't stop the small gasp that escaped you when he took off his mask on camera. He kept his head bowed so his face wouldn't show, hands rubbing over his face.

- The clip of Eddie and Benoit at Wrestlemania twenty plays, leading to Simon and Eugene's match. Rey returns, masked again, and you slip out of Dusty's arms to meet your husband with a hug before he's made it over to your group. Your arms wrap around one another, fingers clutching your shirts as his body starts to shake from the sobs that finally escape him. Nobody makes a move to interrupt you both, understanding that you need each other more than anything. After a few minutes, you both return to the group after calming down a little bit. This time, you sit on Rey's lap and curl up with him. Mentally and physically you're exhausted already, but you know you have to keep going. The filming of Raw is almost over, but you still have to film Smackdown after this. One long tribute for the man you loved so dearly, who loved you so unconditionally, and who was loved by so many.

- Your heart breaks again as you realize that Benoit was asked to speak about Eddie, silent sobs of your own bubbling up as you watch one of your closest friends and Eddie's break on camera. You're semi aware that other people are crying while watching him too, but you've focused on him. There were so many nights Eddie and you spent talking to Chris about the demons he battled constantly, nights where you assured Chris that he was loved and that people needed him in this world. Nancy, their sons and their daughter... They all needed Chris like you and your family needed Eddie.

- After Chris's interview, a clip of Eddie winning his championship belt is played. You look at Rey, quietly asking if you should go find him. Rey nods, telling you that he'll fill you in on what you missed later. He gives you a kiss on the cheek before you get up and go off to find Benoit, finding him after a few minutes and giving him the biggest hug you could manage. You talked with him for a little bit, comforting each other.

- You tell him that you're gonna be there for him like Eddie was, and if he needs anything he can call you at any hour of the day.

- The two of you head back to the rest of the roster, you curling up with Rey again. He kisses your temple as a silent "welcome back", wrapping his arm around you and stroking your side. You've arrived at the tail end of Ric and Regal's match, Ric wins and you can't help the smile that etches across your face as you shake your head slightly at the next clip of Eddie. - You and Rey look at each other before looking back at the screen, both of you enjoying the clip of Eddie accidentally pinning Joanie during the triple threat match on Raw with her and Kurt Angle. This was at the very beginning of your seperation, but you'd happened to watch the show and enjoyed seeing him perform. He looked so confused at first, not realizing what he'd done, then shock and concern set in. He let a smile show, but right went back to being concerned for Joanie who was just waking up after being hit with the Intercontinental Championship belt by Angle.

- The clip ends leading into the last match of the night,John Cena and Randy Orton, Randy's father Bob at ringside. You enjoy the match, but don't really pay too much attention to it. You're a little caught off guard post-match, John taking off his "I'm your Papi" shirt and setting it carefully in the middle of the ring. He set the WWE championship belt down on the shirt, and the show ended. When he arrived backstage, he sought you, Rey and Chavo out and hugged you all.

- Vince approached you, asking if you all were okay to tape Smackdown, or if you needed some time to yourselves before continuing on. Rey and Chavo looked to you, completely backing you up when you said that you were okay to continue.

- "If there was one thing Eddie and I bonded over in our early years of friendship, it was that there was absolutely nothing that was going to stop us from giving our absolute all. We're performers, and the show must go on. For him."

- Taping begins for Smackdown, the words "In memory of Eddie Guerrero" on the screen for a few moments of silence before the image of Dave in Eddie's low rider fill the space. He's on the verge of tears as he talks about Eddie, pausing for a moment when the crowd chants your husband's name. He smiles, continuing for a moment before Eddie's music plays, Dave exiting the car and placing the heavyweight title belt on the hood.

- A second tribute video is played, this one set to Here Without You by Three Doors Down. After the video, a clip from Eddie's "Cheating Death, Stealing Life" DVD plays. Eddie drives around his hometown, his mother talking about how your father in-law taught the entire family to wrestle, with Eddie explaining how the family got into wrestling.

- The end of the clip leads into the first match of the night, Matt Hardy against Carlito. Matt's wearing a shirt and arm band for Eddie, patting the low rider before entering the ring. You watch the match, enjoying Matt's win.

- After the match, Vince walks out and speaks about Eddie, getting choked up during some of it.

- Another clip from Eddie's DVD plays, and it causes you to break down. He speaks about losing you, and having Kaylie during your seperation. You'd never seen or heard this before, and it kills you inside to listen to it. Rey holds you just a little tighter, rubbing a hand over your back to try and comfort you.

- Heidenreich and Animal's match against Cade and Murdoch is a blur for you, too preoccupied to pay close attention to it. Booker T and Sharmell's interview follows it, and you're grateful for his words. You and Rey both thank them as they rejoin you, hugging one another before watching the Lie, Cheat, Steal vignettes along with clips of Eddie doing just that. Lying, cheating, and stealing. Everyone in the room has a chuckle at this, even if it's through tears.

- "If there was one thing he did better than performing, it was lying, cheating and stealing. God knows he could do it better than anyone else in the business, no offense Ric."

- Flair laughs, agreeing with you. Nobody could do it better than Latino Heat himself.

- Paul's interview is next, and you want to just hold him. Once he comes back to you group, he singles you out and wraps you in a hug. You talk a bit during the clip of Eddie talking about growing up in his family and wrestling with his dad.

- Chavo has a match next against JBL and he asks if you and Rey want to join him at ringside. You agree and walk out, you and Rey on either side of him. Jillian Hall escorts JBL to the ring, staying in his corner the entire match. You and Rey cheer when Chavo pulls a classic Eddie, bringing two chairs to the ring and allowing the ref to take one before tossing the other to JBL and dropping to the ground like he'd taken a shot to the head. The ref caught JBL with the chair, yelling at him before getting the chair out of the ring. Chavo gave John a low blow, finishing out the match with the Three Amigos and Eddie's frogsplash. You cheer Chavo on, the three of you hugging before heading backstage again in time to catch the last bit of Eddie talking about his mom.

- The next clip is Eddie speaking about Mania. It ends with Eddie celebrating with Chris. During the clip of Benoit and Eddie, you walk over to Chris and give him a side hug, resting your head on his shoulder. His body shakes a little from sniffling, but seems a bit calmer with you around.

- JBL has an interview, speaking about how he and Eddie were friends regardless of if they were enemies on screen or not and how Eddie said that he could be a main eventer. He mentioned Eddie's support throughout his divorce, and how he wishes he could see Eddie come out in the low rider just one more time. You nod, the members of both rosters agreeing with him.

- The next clip to play is of Eddie beating Lesnar for the title.

- Men's Battle Royal follows, you and Rey rooting for Helms and Juvy, congratulating Juvy for his win as he returns backstage.

- Clips of Latino Heat play, and you can't help but to chuckle at the image of your mother-in-law's reaction to the storyline Eddie had with Joanie. In this moment, you wish she was still with the company. You and Joanie are still extremely close, and you know you'll end up calling her after the show to tell her and talk.

- A clip of Eddie's last match plays, and you remember how excited he was about winning it. He was so proud and excited to represent Smackdown for Survivor series, even if he had to cheat to do so.

Part 2 will be up momentarily!

Tag list: @kchavez666

#wwe imagine #rey mysterio #eddie guerrero #rey mysterio imagine #eddie guerrero imagine #fluff #angst

[lustbile-archive]

LucasxReader

Word Count: 3.8k

Summary/Warnings: 100% inspired by the way that seeing this picture made me black out and is another situation of “was supposed to only be like 1k words”. Warnings: public-ish?, blow job, fingering, suggestions of drug and alcohol consumption. Also disclaimer! This was written before the whole smoking things went down on twitter so I’m not saying I’m psychic but I might be who knows.

The stale smell of beer and marujana strings the inside of your nose as you enter the empty entrance of the house, the only evidence that life existed in the home, was the muffled talking and music that came from the basement of the home.

The notification from the text that Lucas had sent telling you he’d see you soon still lived on the lock screen of your phone as you walked down the hallway of the house that belonged to a friend of his that you had only met a handful of times before. The single hit of a blunt that your boyfriend had inhaled hours ago was enough to have him texting you to tell you how much he missed you, but he was unable to come meet you both from his consumption of the drug, but also his lack of transportation or someone sober enough to drive him to your apartment. So instead you found yourself slipping on the first pair of shoes you could see, and drove to the address he shared with you.

The rumbling voices and deep bass only got louder as you got closer to the door, your heart thumping at both the anticipation of seeing your boyfriend, and also having to face his inebriated friends at such a late hour. The smell of alcohol and smoke hits you stronger when you open the door, and you have to take a moment to mentally prepare before walking into the room.

There’s only a beat of time before they notice the new presence in the room, another before they realize who you were exactly, and then they start quietly cheering a slurring in excitement. Though, amongst all the noise, there’s one voice that rings louder than any and directly into your ears.

He resembled a fur rug in the way he had draped himself in the worn leather recliner that had been tucked into the corner of the room. The shine that showed in his big brown eyes from across the room told you that, if he wasn’t slowed slightly from the second hand buzz he was getting from the amount that the other boys had hotboxed the room, he would have gotten up to greet you. Instead, he excitedly patted his big hands against his thighs in invitation for you to take your favorite throne.

You can't help but mirror the large grin that he throws your way, and after you step over the two boys that had found themselves collapsed on the floor in front of you and the dozens of empty cans that cluttered the room, you make your way slowly to where he sat. His smile grows as you get closer and you feel your heart beat faster in response.

“Long time no see,” he speaks when you finally stand in front of him, his words broken up by his growing giggles. You can’t help but smile down at him in admiration when he reaches to grab at your hips and pull you into his lap.

“It has been a while hasn’t it?” you tease as you straddle him and wrap your hands loosely around his shoulders, “i’m not surprised that when you get all giggly and high is when you’re texting me begging to come see you.”

“Not surprised?” his head jerks back gently in curiosity and in an attempt to get a better look at your face, “am I predictable?”

“Wouldn’t say predictable,” you start to gently rock back and forth as you speak, your hands moving to run through his thick and messy hair as his knead at the muscles of your hips and thighs, “but you’re clingy, and it only gets worse when you’re high.”

“M’not that high,” his head shakes and he runs his hands up your back, pushing you forward until your noses touch, “just high enough.”

“Yeah I can tell,” he’s always been good at handling his weed and himself for that matter, but you do know that he’s gone enough that he doesn’t notice your eyes darting down towards his lap, “but I do know that you’re at least a little high, because you always get hard really easy when you are.”

A deep groan shakes his chest in faux embarrassment at getting caught, his smile softening to give him a more arrogant aura as his hips involuntarily thrust up towards you, “sorry bout that, but i’ve been thinking about you long before I ever texted you so it was bound to happen.”

“It’s fine, flattering actually that I can get you hard without even being here,” you can feel yourself softening as you speak, and you slowly shift forward as you speak until you can feel his bulge pressing into the seat of your pajama shorts, “if you come home with me I can help you with it.”

His head shakes in disappointment, “nah I promised a few of the guy that i’d help them move out of their apartment tomorrow so i’ve gotta be here for that in the morning,” he bites at his cheek once the words are in the air, the thoughts running through his mind are almost deafening as they make his eyebrows draw together in concentration.

“You’re gonna hurt yourself thinking that hard Xuxi,” you’ve slipped into a soft whisper as you speak, and you move your hand to press your thumb between his brows in hopes to relieve the tension, “what's going on in that pretty head of yours?”

“I mean,” he shrugs, trying to procrastinate telling you what he's thinking, “you could always help me get off right here.”

You’re woken up from your daze when the words leave his mouth, your heart thumping at what he's suggesting, “what do want me to grind on you ‘til you come in your pants? Isn’t that a little too high school for you?”

“No not grind on me,” his hands return to your hips and he begins to pick at a loose string on the band of your shorts, his eyes moving down to where your crotch meets his to avoid your eyes, “I mean like maybe… blowing me?”

“You want me to blow you right here in front of all your dumb friends?” you harshly whisper hoping none of the mentioned boys will stir from their drug induced daze.

His eyes immediately dart up again to lock onto yours, “I mean you don’t have to, I just thought maybe it’d be a little exciting y’know. And i’d return the favor like always,” as he finishes speaking, one of his hands begins to move. It lands directly in the space between your thighs, and as he starts to softly pet at your through your shorts, you feel your guard melting away, the small sparks of pleasure from his usually rough fingers making your head tilt forward.

“If any of them say anything I’ll kill you.”

“They’re a lot more gone than I am, they probably won't even notice,” the excitement that builds in him is evident in his tone and you can't stop the way your own chest blooms with your own excitement in response.

“They better be,” you slip out of his hold, slowly sliding down into the floor until you're kneeling in front of him. His fingers now drum against his thighs in excitement now that you’re no longer there for him to hold on to.

You stop yourself from turning around and checking on the boys around you, fearing that seeing them again will make this all too real and make you back out. It does feed your mind paranoia, but you can't deny that the idea of putting your mouth around your boyfriend in a room of other people doesn’t warm the pit in your stomach, and you’re almost even ashamed to admit to yourself that you can feel a wetness building in between your thighs.

Your fingers slightly shake as you run them up his thighs, and when they meet where his rest, he momentarily wraps your fingers with his to give you a reassuring squeeze. Once he releases your hands, you start to move again, until they reach the band of his sweatpants.

“Oh fuck, okay,” you hear him murmur to himself as his hips tilt up to help as you tug the fabric down until its wrapped around his thighs. Your eyes move to look at him again before you speak.

“So you just don’t wear underwear when you hang out with your friends?” you can't imagine how weird you two look as you playfully scold him as his moves his hand to hide his growing smile and his mostly hard length lays against the fabric of his t-shirt that covers his stomach, “I can’t imagine it’d be too comfortable to help your friend move apartments when you’re free balling it.”

“I have a change of clothes in my bag,” he defends quietly, his hand falling back to his side, “I hate wearing underwear when i’m getting high, makes me feel constricted.”

“You’re so fucking weird,” you say bluntly as you go to wrap your hand around him, and regardless of the playfull look of disappointment you wear, you begin to slowly move your hand up and down the length of him.

You feel a tight sense of pride in your chest as when you start to move your fist, he stiffens at the sudden pleasure. The mean smile you throw at him makes him bite down on his bottom lip and his hands start to twitch as he tries to decide what to do with them.

You lose the eye contact you two had when, as you move your hand up the length of his him, you trail your hand with the flat of your tongue. You stiffen when he lets out a groan as he tilts his head back, hoping it won't stir the boys around you.

“Quiet,” you whisper without thinking, moving your hand to hold him at the base as he breathes a laugh out through his nose. You hold him as you put the tip of him in your mouth, rolling your tongue over him as you taste the arousal he’s begun to spill. You start to move down further when he moves to hold your jaw, stopping you.

“I was being serious when I said I’ve been hard for awhile,” he says in a strained and warning tone. He jumps in your mouth when you hum in acknowledgment.

You try not to cringe when as you pull off there’s a soft popping noise that follows, “so?” you ask tilting your head and moving your hand up and down as you speak. Every time your fingers reach the tip you brush the pad of your thumb over him making him twitch, “how long do you think it will take for you to get there?”

“Not long,” he sounds vaguely disappointed in himself, but the way your wrist moves causing it to melt away as he sinks back into his seat, “not with your mouth.”

You grin, laughing warmly at what you decide to take as a compliment.

“Tight,” you nod, starting to slightly feel the warm effects of the smoked out room, before you tilt your head back down and put your waiting mouth back around him.

You try to ignore the moan he lets out in response, praying to whatever that’s listening that the others will stay in their daze. You take a quick breath through your nose, before you move him as deep in your throat as you can.

Your lips bump against your hand where you still hold him, your tongue licking against the vein that pumps against it, before you move your hand to rest on his hip, allowing you to go further. You let out a soft moan when your nose presses against his stomach, the feeling of him hitting the back of your throat making you drool slightly, some even spilling past your lips and dampening his pants.

The vibrations from your mouth run up his spine, pushing more quiet groans from his chest. You can feel his hands moving around you as he desperately tries to decide what to do with them, before one grabs at your hand until your fingers are laced together and the other rests on the back of your neck.

You reach to tap his wrist momentarily in warning, before you start slowly moving your head up. You look up when all that remains in your mouth is his tip, forcing him to hold eye contact before taking him back until he hits the back of your throat again. You don’t let up on your stare as you repeat the motion over and over.

His face screws up, almost as if he’s in pain, and his fingers flex around the back of your neck as if he's holding himself back from holding you too roughly. As you move, you start to run your free hand up to his stomach, scraping your nails against the line of hair that runs from under his belly button making more deep noises pass his lips regardless of his attempts to suppress them.

“Baby please,” he pleads, seemingly unaware of what exactly he’s asking for, but when he starts to pulse his hips gently with the same pace that you move your mouth on him, you know that he’s getting closer to the edge.

Another soft pop is heard as you move off him again, a faux innocent pout falling on your lips, “want you to come in my mouth Xuxi,” you taunt, and the way he starts thrusting into the empty air tells you how much your words affect him.

You move the hand on his stomach to wrap around him once again, pumping him a few times before holding him at his base and running the flat of your tongue up the length of him. You pause when you reach his tip, pressing it against the muscle as you move it slowly back and forth. He looks like he’s on the edge of insanity when you leave your mouth wide open as you start to move your wrist slowly, your grip exactly the way you know will make him crumble.

You can’t help but flinch slightly as he starts to come, the thickness of his come hitting your tongue before his noises reach your ears, but you will your eyes to stay open enough to watch him as he falls apart. His hips continue to move, smearing the evidence of him around your tastebuds, and the way his head tilts back strains his neck and makes thick veins pop out in a way that makes your feel dizzy.

His quickened breath starts to steady again as you move to pull away, but with his eyes still shut close, you can’t help but jump when the hand on the back of your neck moves to grip your jaw, his thumb moving until it hooks into your mouth and behind your front bottom teeth to hold your jaw open making your unable to swallow what he’s left behind on your tongue.

He leans forward, his now open eyes looking delirious as he lets go of your hand to wrap it around your waist to hoist you back into his lap. You scramble to your feet as best as you can with his thumb almost painfully holding your mouth open, praying none of it drips onto the carpet below you. You try even harder to move your legs to properly straddle him, as it seems in his crazed delirium he has no consideration as to where your knees could possibly land.

Before you can fully comprehend the motions happening so quickly, you're pressed tightly against his chest, your fists holding tightly onto the front of his shirt as he uses the hand on your jaw to drag you to slot your open mouth against his.

The pleased moan that rolls out of you without thinking matches perfectly with the one he lets out once your mouths cover each other. His hand moves away from your jaw, the way his tongue shoves itself into your mouth and licks at the evidence of his orgasm and the back of your teeth is enough to keep you perfectly in place. You can feel him pushing some of his come further back into your mouth as well as taking some into his own, you two break for only a moment to swallow before your lips meet again, the taste of his being permanently burned into your mind as his warm breath gets your dizzier than any of the smoke dancing around your bodies could.

There’s no verbal warning before his arm tightens around your waist while the other one greedily shoves itself into the front of your shorts, the yelp of surprise you let out is completely devoured by his mouth as he happily hums against you.

“I knew you’d be wet,” he says smugly when you break away to moan at the way his fingers immediately press into you, your forehead pressed against his temple as you watch his hand move under the fabric, “love having me in your mouth don’t you.”

“Lucas hush,” you scold as your eyes fall shut, his long middle and ring finger curling inside you. You feel your muscles relax as his fingers thrust against the spot inside you that makes your eyes flutter. One hand lets go of the grip you had on his shirt to lay softly against the side of his face, this and the way your body starts to curl against his makes his lips pull into an endeared smile that you feel under the pad of your thumb.

You can feel your hips rocking against his hand similarly to the way he had trusted into your mouth, your thighs trying to flex together regardless of the way his legs keep them spread.

Once he’s gotten his fingers drenched in your arousal, he slowly pulls them out of you making you whimper at the loss. He quietly coos at you to quiet you before his wet fingers start to roll over the sensitive nerves of your neglected clit, you jump again at the sudden feeling and he only chuckles with pride in response.

He starts moving his hand that’s wrapped around your waist, his fingers brushing against your ribs through the old worn shirt you wear to go to sleep and it almost feels like you're melting as he pets at you with his determined fingers.

“Wanna see you come so bad,” he starts to mutter in the way that tells you he's not fully conscious of what he’s saying out loud as he slips into his own little world, something you’ve learned he does every once in awhile when he’s pleasuring you, “been so long, miss it so bad.”

“Xuxi,” his name being the only word your brain can form as the slurred way he speaks starts to flood your chest with endearment. His hand picks up its pace as he starts to lose himself in watching you fall apart, no longer aware of the room that you sit in that’s full of his friends, unaware of what jealousy he’d feel if they were to see you like this even if they were too high to remember. Something about the way your thighs flex and your body starts to shake makes it feel like he’s in a trance and he only wishes he could see you bare and gushing for him.

His name slips from you again, this time as a warning as you feel your lower stomach flex and relax over and over as you reach your finish. You clench softly around nothing and you become only vaguely aware of how the hand placed on his face is now curling into a loose fist and your nails scrape against the skin of his cheekbone and jaw.

The third time his name falls from your lips, it's broken up by pleased and strained whimpers as you start to come. His mind is too busy reveling in the noises you make and the way your arousal continues to dampen you further to think to slow down his motions, his quickly moving fingers carrying you through your orgasm as your head rolls to the side and your teeth latch onto the soft skin of his earlobe.

The grunt he lets out at the small bite of pain and the unending friction makes you start to shake and whine as it feels like you’ll never escape the pleasure he inflicts on you. You pant through your teeth, and your toes painfully curl as he overstimulates your body, and he probably would continue his subconscious torture on your body if you didn’t come to your sense enough to move your hand away from his face to wrap around his wrist.

You all but rip his hand from your shorts, his name being spoken again but with a more muddied tone behind it. Once his fingers are off of you, he wakes up from whatever hypnosis your body had put on him and your slumping tired against his chest.

You cringe as, when he tightens his hold on you to hug you against his body, you also hear the undeniable slurping noise of him sucking what you had left behind on his fingers. He hums happily around his digits and you can’t help but return the noise when he pulls them out with a dramatic pop of his own and turns his head until he can nudge you with his nose. Once you lift your head enough, his lips return to yours and you're both humming in content against one another as the dull taste of yourself mixes with the aftertaste of his come that was still lingering on your tongues.

“You can sleep over,” he assures when he breaks the lazy kiss, knowing what you’d be asking before the words can even leave your mouth, “the guest room is clean and you get dibs.”

“I love you,” your sudden admission surprising both of you, you with how you don’t fully remember forming the thought and him at the suddenness, but he happily laughs in response regardless.

“I love you too,” he pulls you in a more comfortable position as you cuddle against his chest, “just for being you but also for blowing me in a room full of my dumb friends.”

“Probably will never happen again,” your words slur more and more as you speak, the tiredness you felt before you arrived meshing with the exhaustion you feel now.

“I know,” he nuzzles his face against yours as he speaks, “but I enjoyed it while I could.”

#nct smut #wayv smut #Lucas smut

[mattzerella-sticks]

Ticking Photobomb, T, 1.6k

Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, Evan ‘Buck’ Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Evan ‘Buck’ Buckley & TK Strand

TK loves Carlos, and wants their relationship to work out. Before they can recapture even a semblance of the bliss they shared, Carlos needs to fix his mistake and properly introduce TK to his family. Until then... Carlos deserves at least some punishment. He only hopes Buck will forgive him, for involving him in his and Carlos's first big fight as a couple.

Only it's not Buck's forgiveness he'll need.

ao3 link

based off of this post

           He’s wary. He and TK are supposed to be enjoying a delicious meal outside at a nearby park, sun high in the sky, bright but not too cruel, as they sit together on a thin, yellow blanket, and Carlos cannot enjoy any of this beautiful date because a tiny voice in the back of his mind warns him that TK’s silence is a cover for something more sinister. His boyfriend’s smile, aimed at his phone as it has been since they arrived, means trouble. The small, continuous giggles that eke free sound like alarms. Giggles offered with every bite, where he’d type a short message and then set his phone down; only to grab it halfway through its jingling ringtone – TK never usually keeps that on. Carlos remembered him complaining how he hates ringtones, prefers having his phone vibrate. Why is it on now? And why is he texting while they’re on a date? And why does his laughter make Carlos cringe?

           “Who are you texting?” he asks, finally, Carlos pushing the plastic container with his half-finished sandwich to the side.

           TK glances up from his phone. “No one.”

           “No one?”

           “Just a friend,” TK says, pinning Carlos with a strange expression that squeezes his heart. It makes the sweat pricking his temples relocate and journey down, rolling towards his chin. Carlos wipes at his face as TK adds, “seriously, you don’t have to worry.”

           It’s the way he said ‘you’ that does Carlos in. That has him dredging up what he already considered resolved since before they sat down. Discussed, at length, over the phone, with Carlos apologizing repeatedly. TK assured him they were good. “I thought we were good?”

           TK sighs, “We are good.” Then, he mumbles, “As good as any two friends can be.”

           Carlos’s frown deepens, mouth resembling a severe gash carved into his face. “I knew it!” Carlos cries, pointing at him. “You’re still mad at me.”

           “I never said I wasn’t!”

           “You said it was settled –“

           “Because it is,” TK insists, a heavy glare drawing all breath out of Carlos’s chest. The façade he wore for their date has been pulled away, and Carlos sees exactly how distressed TK remained after he introduced him to his parents as his ‘friend’. Even with Carlos promising that he would remedy the situation soon, gather his boyfriend and family together and explain the truth of his romantic life, TK clings tight to the pain Carlos caused by letting fear sway his choice, both at the farmer’s market and when he let TK walk out of his home, relationship dangling from a fraying cord. It frays ever closer to breaking. “It’s settled until you work up the nerve to have that dinner you were talking about.”

           Carlos splutters, “That’s not – you know, with the pandemic how hard it’s…”

           His excuses further irritate TK, who retreats into his phone. He texts someone else. Perhaps the same person he’s been texting this entire time. “Then it’s settled.”

           “If it’s so settled,” Carlos asks, “why even bother agreeing to our date today?” He gestures at their unfinished meals, probably cold and stale. If they weren’t, it’s not like Carlos feels like eating anymore.

           TK stops texting, smirking at Carlos. Usually, it riles Carlos up in that he wants to kiss it off of him. Right now, Carlos swallows the urge to shove his boyfriend onto his ass.  “A date?” TK asks, words languid and breezy, spaced out by palpable sarcasm. “Why would you think this was a date,” he continues, phone tapping against his chin, “we are just friends after all…”

           Anger and disappointment converge violently inside Carlos, fighting for release. Neither can, as his vibrating phone pulls his focus from TK. He opens the message on autopilot, confused since it’s from TK. Confusion then drops into the cesspool of his emotions, like Mentos in Coke, and Carlos explodes.

           “Why did you send me this?” he demands, showing TK a picture he sent to Carlos of himself. A picture they took, together, when visiting a lake one weekend long ago during the summer. A picture taken after they spent the entire afternoon swimming, bathing suits forgotten on the pier. A picture where TK’s chiseled physique was on display, skin dazzling as fading sunlight turned water droplets into diamonds, and TK’s sunglasses rested low on his nose as he smiled to the side where Carlos was. Was. As in not anymore. Only his arm, slung around his boyfriend’s shoulder, remained. Saved by being impossible to crop out. “Well?” Carlos asks again.

           TK sighs, “Oh, I must have sent that by mistake.”

           “You wanted to send me something else?”

           “No,” TK clarifies, “I sent that to you by mistake. It was supposed to go to Buck, see?” TK shows Carlos his message thread, with the picture he sent Carlos, timestamped, showing he forwarded it to Buck first, then Carlos.

           “…Buck.”

           “Yeah, Buck,” TK continues, leaving his texts and diving into his photo album. He selects a group shot of the 126, plus a few extra members. He zooms closer on one face, Buck’s, enough that Carlos can distinguish the two birthmark spots above his eyebrows. “I’m sure I told you about him.”

           “You did,” Carlos nods. He tears his gaze from Buck’s smile, fuming. “The firefighter who flirted with you.”

           “I mean, he also helped me save my dad,” TK says, “but, yeah… he also flirted with me.” TK lowers his phone, chuckling, “We’ve just been chatting back and forth – as friends do – when I realized… y’know, I told him I wasn’t interested, because I had this really awesome boyfriend who I love, but since that’s not the case anymore, we’re only friends apparetly, I figured I might as well shoot my shot. Find out if he’s still interested. Maybe once quarantine is done, I can take some time off and… see what Los Angeles has to offer.” The eyebrow wiggle was completely unnecessary. TK communicated exactly what of Los Angeles he intends to see, regardless of how his eyebrows moved.

           He’s better than this. Carlos knows what TK is doing. What the picture, and its delivery, was supposed to accomplish. What it’s succeeding at. He can win this, simply by ignoring TK’s teasing.

           Except.

           “You are not going to Los Angeles.” Carlos scowls, “Not without me. And especially not if Buck is gonna be there.”

           TK scoffs, “What are you, my boyfriend?”

           “…Yes!”

           “Says who?” he asks, “Your parents?”

           They’re outside. In public, surrounded by people who keep their distance. Unfortunately, their voices carry wide enough they draw a sizeable crowd. Carlos doesn’t notice until TK storms off and leaves him with the blanket, the abandoned food, and their audience.

           Carlos blushes, hiding behind his hands. He wishes he never fumbled back then, in the farmer’s market. He also, briefly, wishes he and Buck switched places. At least then TK would be treating him to risqué pictures. At least Carlos would be having a good time, if he were Buck. He’d be receiving sexy photos from a certified dreamboat instead of suffering because of his own mistakes.

                                       ---------------------------

           Buck stumbles over his words, stuttering, rushing out his explanation to a stone-faced Eddie. “Seriously,” he says, “I don’t – I don’t know why TK sent me that picture of him! It’s not like I asked! One second we’re talking about movies and the next thing I know – shirtless TK!”

           “Yeah, I know,” Eddie huffs, arms folded across his chest, “I saw.”

           He shouldn’t have. If Buck hadn’t left his phone on the table to help Bobby in the kitchen. If he didn’t hear his phone beep with an arriving message, almost vibrating off the table from it. If Eddie, along with Hen and Chim, weren’t climbing the stairs at the moment, and if he ignored Buck’s plea to hand him his phone. To punch in the code – which he knew, of course Eddie knew – since Buck was wrist deep in a turkey’s hole.

           Buck washed his hands immediately, drying them on his pants as he chased Eddie the few feet towards the couch.

           “So,” Eddie continues, “you and TK…”

           He and TK? “We’re friends,” he says, repeating himself after Eddie’s disbelieving stare. “Okay, I mean – he did turn me down once, when we were leaving Texas. But he said he had a boyfriend –“

           “He turned you down?” Eddie asks, “You flirted with him?”

           “No!” Buck shrugs, running his hand over his forehead, frowning at the sweat that pooled there. “Well, I didn’t think I was. But he did? And – and he left before I could say anything, but I didn’t think it mattered since he, y’know, had a boyfriend!” He stomps his foot, irritation bubbling from the pit of his stomach and out his mouth. “Besides! Why does it matter if he sends me pictures?” Nice pictures. Distracting pictures that made Buck question exactly why TK misunderstanding his friendliness was a problem. “Why are you so angry?”

           “Because… because…” Eddie looks past Buck, at the peanut gallery assembled by the kitchen. Hen and Chimney watching with interest while Bobby pretends cooking a turkey involves his whole focus. None of the seem keen to jump in and help. “Because… you…” Suddenly, Eddie stands. Buck recoils, stepping backwards. “You know what,” Eddie says, digging into his pocket, “I’m telling Marjan to unfollow you on Instagram.”

           “What?”

           “And!” he yells, phone free and on, “I’m telling her to block you!”

           “What? No – Eddie, no! Don’t!” Buck follows his friend, pleading, “C’mon, she hasn’t even liked any of my photos yet… Eddie… Eddie!”

           Eddie ignores him, furiously typing the end of Buck’s most famous connection online. In his haste, Buck forgets his phone on the counter. Eddie takes precedence over his phone.

           Later, Buck will return to it. He will respond to TK’s picture, sending a tidal wave of texts at the Texan firefighter ranging between the immense trouble that picture landed him in and how TK can repay him by convincing Marjan to follow him again.

           But that’s later. Now Buck slams his fist against the firetruck, yelling for Eddie to unlock the door.

           Eddie doesn’t.

#911 on fox #911 lone star #carlos reyes #tk strand #evan 'buck' buckley #eddie diaz #tarlos #buddie #tarlos fanfic #buddie fanfic

[technicallyr43]

I’ve had this stuck in my head for awhile, so let me lay out the bones of a story for y’all. Watch me obliterate canon for some fandoms.

The apocalypse, where Lucifer led some angels and rebelled against god and were subsequently banished from heaven. Some say that it was due to them not agreeing that humans should be a part of Gods love. Some say they didn’t agree with Gods plan. But the truth is that it was never about the humans. It was about a brother.

The Archangels were all brothers. The first born, Gabriel, the might of god, who was his first and spread his word making the others. Michael, who was like god, who carried out His wishes without hesitation . Raphael, who healed like god, a kind soul who treated anyone and everyone without prejudice. Lucifer, the light of god, who led the younger angels in worship and led them. Uriel, the judgement of god, who sought justice for all and burned with fire. Amenadiel, the warrior of god, who upheld the law of all that was foretold and wouldn’t lose a battle.

With the creation of Angels, and their sub-species, the archangels had a hand in governing over the younger brood. And then God created humans. The Angels viewed the humans as beneath them, and wondered why God would create a lesser being. Some questioned outright, others to themselves. Lucifer asked the most questions, raised the most concerns. But none that were enough to be exiled. Until a tragedy struck.

The first born, Gabriel, was murdered. His soul disappeared and his grace dispersed. It was such a shock that it caused unnatural disasters on earth, and all the beings felt it. Everyone was in shock. How could such a powerful angel suddenly die? The Archangels pleaded with God to ask what happened, but God remained silent. And so, the unrest continued until the 2 sides broke apart and started the War.

The apocalypse lasted years, until finally Michael struck down Lucifer and the other angels, causing them to fall to Earth, and then keep falling. They fell past the dirt and the stone into Hell, and then God spoke to Lucifer.

“This is your realm now. The deepest pit of the darkest corner contains an evil that even I cannot contain. Protect it and you shall have free will.”

And so Lucifer did. He raged against it but when he found out who was behind the prison, he reluctantly guarded it. The fallen angels became demons, and humanity grew.

With the fall of Lucifer, the death of Gabriel and the disappearance of Raphael, the upper echelons of Heaven scrambled to put it back in order. Angels were promoted to higher places, and prophecies were spoken as everyone knew that another war would happen. And then the events of Good Omen happen.

After Adam says no to the apocalypse, Heaven and Hell are making new plans, but then Lucifer leaves Hell, and the good TV show we know as Lucifer starts. And because it’s now been brought to my attention that Lucifer is also part of DC, Arrow, Flash, and Supergirl are here too. Superman finds a little girl and he takes her to Flash Bc she’s got some weird power to rewind stuff.

So one day, a battle starts out, and an evil creature named Lilith starts destroying the world. The heroes are trying to fight her but she’s too strong. Then Lucifer comes to fight, and the archangels too. They don’t know why they fee the need to fight, but they do. Crowley and Aziraphael are there too, and the battle rages on and everyone takes refuge in a crumpled church. They’re all tired and injured, some dying, and it’s clear they’ve lost. And then they hear someone ask them if the battle must go on.

Everyone looks up at the altar and see a long blonde haired man looking at them warmly. The flash crew recognize him and Cisco is like, “yo gabe! Wtf, you disappeared like months ago and ur showing up now. I got some shitty timing”. Gabe just laughs and Crowley is looking like he’s seen a ghost, and says, “did you call him Gabe?”.

Aziraphael asks if he’s alright and why that matters, but Gabe just answers, “it would be you to recognize me like this, Raphael.” The other archangels lose their shit, Bc they realize that Crowley is the missing Raphael and this man is their supposed-to-be-dead brother. They explain that the apocalypse happened Bc of Gabriel dying, and are understandably upset. Gabe just smiles and starts singing “You will be found” from Dear Evan Hansen. (I found that the lyrics are pretty spot on for what happens in this plot)

While he’s singing, their wounds start healing and they feel rejuvenated. And suddenly the little girl screams out “Papa”, and runs to Gabe. Her little horn activates and her rewind power envelopes the whole planet as it rewound to before Lilith started killin people. By the time they’re done, Lilith has noticed Gabe and is boiling in rage.

Because before the Archangels, God created something else. He created Leviathans, a grotesque creature that devours all good. Recognizing his mistake, he create the first archangel, Gabriel to fight them. The both of them successfully lock them up in the prison that the Goddess is locked up in, separated but contained. Well, after God created Humans, a Leviathan broke out due to a human being curious, and immediately went to Heaven to feast of the angel grace up there. Gabriel was able to stop them from entering the gates, but was seriously wounded by the beast. God entered the fray, and was able to immobilize Lilith, the leviathan, but was distracted by Gabriel quickly dying AO she escaped to another dimension. God immediately used an enormous amount of energy to take Gabriel’s soul and fling it to a dimension where he could be born again and find his grace when he’s ready. But after that, he was too weak to speak to the other angels without hurting them. So remained silent until he was able to gather strength to speak to Lucifer about the prison.

And Gabriel was reborn in the MHA world as Hizashi Yamada. He became a hero, a teacher, a radio host, a husband and a parent, before Lilith found him and yanked him and his daughter, Eri, into the dimension she was in. Gabe was able to get back his grace and flung Eri to somewhere she would be safe before ripping his grace out of him and flinging it back to his world and dropping from the dimension stream. He found himself in the Flash world, with no memory. His grace split apart, finding itself into his husband, Aizawa Shouta, and his children, shinsou Hitoshi and Eri. And then enough found it’s way back to him so he could remember and perform the miracle he did at the church. And when Eri found him again, he gained a large portion of his grace, allowing him to fight Lilith and cram her back in the prison, with the help of Lucifer.

And that’s the end of this book. The second part will be up tomorrow.

What the fuck have I done

#dadmic #aizawa shouta #eraserhead #present mic #yamada hizashi #dadzawa #mha prompts #mha #bnha prompts #bnha #angel Hizashi Yamada #Eri #shinsou hitoshi #lucifer #crowley #good omens #aziraphale #amenadial #the flash #arrowverse #supergirl #superman #Cisco

[snootsnoot-fiction]

One Minute

Pairing: Negan x Reader 

Word count: 1.5k

Warnings: Smut, daddy!kink, dom!negan, sub!reader, teasing, and a sprinkling of fluff just before the smut.

Requested: Can I request a one shot with Negan and reader, where the reader is sat on Negan's lap and grinding against him. Negan tells them to stop but they grin and act like they're doing nothing wrong so Negan grabs their hips and tells them they have a minute to cum and they can't touch themself. Whether or not they succeed I'll leave it up to you.

Author's note: First official fic for tumblr, pretty proud of it :) I had fun writing this purely just because of the enjoyment I get knowing how the smutty stuff affects certain people ;)

Summary: Negan has had a stressful day, and you decide to be a little naughty..

The apocalypse was as unexpected as any other extinction-level event. The only difference with this one was that it had failed. The surviving human race slowly but surely banded together, creating several communities throughout America at least. Negan was the leader of one of these communities. He was the leader of The Saviours. 

Negan had entered this new world in one of the worst ways imaginable. The loss he had suffered changed him, but perhaps for the better with what the world had become. He soon formed a group, led by him and his precious Lucille. A notion that eventually turned into a whole community that didn't dare disobey him. The Saviours took over other communities. Some of which suffered losses of their own after initially denying them.

The Saviours leader was never unreasonable. He had a desire to help keep the human race going. His men and women were not allowed to kill innocents lest they were prepared to face consequence. As he had said before, people were a resource. Children especially were off-limits. Despite his rough and cold nature, Negan did have morals, and in the long term, he was trying to help keep the human race from going extinct. 

Hilltop, The Kingdom, and the Garbage People were all under his thumb. The most recent addition was Alexandria. None of that was what mattered at this moment in time. In this mess of an apocalypse, he had found someone. Someone worth doing all this for on a personal level. It was little over a year ago now that Negan and some of his people were out for no other reason than the man had needed to let off a little steam after an especially stressful day. It wasn't long after he decided to separate from them that he stumbled across a figure lying in the darkness of the perfect little hiding spot. 

At first glance, he wouldn't have thought you were an adult - you were curled into a ball, making yourself look smaller than you actually were to begin with. Becoming aware of a new presence, you soon scrambled around to face him with almost wild eyes. Negan knew you couldn't have always lived like this, but you had long enough. Your hair was as wild as your eyes, you remained quiet for a fair while before finally speaking, and so dirty he could safely assume that anyone that would have known you wouldn't have recognised you. For the first time in a long time, he just wanted to help with nothing else in mind. There was just something about you. 

It took some time, but Negan eventually persuaded you to come with him. You figured there was nothing else to lose now. Whatever happened as a result of coming with this man, you knew it could only be beneficial for you. You didn't like suddenly being surrounded by other people, but with Negan next to you, nobody dared act against you. With the realisation of this, you came to feel safe in his presence. When you arrived at the Sanctuary, you were fed, cleaned, and soon back to good health. Though it took you a while to relax. Until then, you spent a lot of your time with the man that found you. 

After a particularly annoying visit to Alexandria, Negan came back to the Sanctuary feeling more than a little stressed, but otherwise happy to be home. Dismissing his men, the man himself made his way to his bedroom. You weren't there. You must be interacting with one of the people you took a shine to, or perhaps getting some fresh air. He knew you liked to actually get out and go for a walk every so often. Resting Lucille against a wall, Negan threw his jacket onto his bed and sat in the comfy chair next to it, letting his eyes rest a moment.

A couple minutes later, his eyes flew open at the sound of footsteps. You had just walked in, and the sight of you made the man's lips twitch in a soft smile. 

"C'mere baby…" he held his arms out, gesturing for you to sit on his lap. You smiled at him warmly as you happily approached, sitting on him, lying back against him with your head on his shoulder as you looked at him. 

"Daddy needs a hug." He spoke in a near whisper as he wrapped his arms tightly around you for a few seconds. Meanwhile a pleasant little tingle went down you at his use of the word daddy. Negan knew full well the effect such words had on you, but it was natural now, and he loved it almost as much as you clearly did. 

This man had an effect on you like no other human ever had before. While making you feel as safe as can be, he simultaneously could make you quake at the knees until you were an absolute mess. A mess he always cleaned up for you. Despite the hug, your brain started working the same way it always did when he used pet names in private. Humming appreciatively, he let go, resting his arms on the chair. Not before giving your hair a soft stroke. As he relaxed, sighing happily, that's when you knew exactly what you were going to do.

Slowly at first, your hips started to grind. Just a little to begin with, but you sucked in a silent breath at the small amount of friction you already felt. Negan could immediately tell what you were doing, but he didn't do anything for a few seconds. 

"Y/N… stop…" his voice was low, but you weren't stopping, and his excitement was only growing.

"Stop what?" You spoke softly as you looked back at him with a grin. A grin that instantly told him your intentions. You slowly but surely increased your pace, trying to stop the whimpers escaping you with some success. It wasn't until his pants were painfully restrictive that he finally acted. Hands flying to your hips, he gripped tightly and held you in place. The sudden action made you yelp, and you looked back at him with a bite of your lower lip. 

"Oh no, don't you act all innocent now." The stern tone made you flush as warmth spread through your lower body. He had used his authoritative tone. You knew you were in trouble now.

"But daddy.." you whimper as your hips struggled, making you more and more  desperate for friction.

"No." Negan's voice made you go quiet. "Look at me." His demand had you whipping your head back around, and the look in his eyes could have made you actually melt if he didn't have such a secure hold on you. A moment of silence passed - excruciating for you - before he finally spoke. 

"One minute." At your slightly puzzled expression, he continued, "You have one goddamn minute to get yourself there /without/ touching yourself, or you won't be getting there at all tonight."

You were wearing a thin pair of pants with no underwear, but you weren't sure if you'd be able to reach that peak. So you pouted. The look on Negan's face did not change. One way or another, he would be allowing himself to get there. Whether you did was on you. 

"One minute is all you're getting for being naughty." Before you had the chance to respond, he gave a thrust of his own hips to make you start, also forcing a small moan from you. With your hips free of the man's tight grip, they began grinding again, whimpers now falling freely. At first, you were unsure of what to do with your hands. You wanted to grip your own legs until your nail broke through the material of your pants, but you couldn't. 

When the familiar feeling began building in the pit of your stomach, your hands suddenly found themselves gripping the arms of the chair until your knuckles went pale. Whimpers and needy, desperate moans fell from your lips like a waterfall. Negan could feel his own need, but he wasn't going to get there with his pants still on. 

You were almost there. The build up was intense. You wouldn't have gotten this close so quickly if it wasn't for the lack of action recently. You wanted to explode in the best way because of this man. Moans of "daddy" escaped you seconds before Negan had his hands on your hips again, holding you still. Struggling more than before, you let out needy whimpers. You had gotten so close, and now that high was fading away.

"Minute's up." Negan's voice was gravelly with his own need. Though you didn't turn around, you pouted in response. Suddenly your back was flush against him. One arm still wrapped tightly around your waist, he had pressed the other hand to the bottom of your neck as he pulled your body right against his.

"I might let you cum…" Negan whispered darkly into your ear, making you visibly shiver in delight, and you whimpered obediently, desperate for release. "If you promise to be good, and not touch yourself while you suck my dick." Flames shot up your cheeks at his straightforwardness. He knew full well what you would do.

"I promise daddy.." the words came in a whimper as you gained control of your hips, clambering off Negan's lap. You could only hope he would let to reach your own euphoria...

@lemonboy-milo

#negan x reader #negan #negan fic #smut #daddy k!nk #the walking dead

[stillness-in-green]

I saw speculation on this going around & I’m curious to get your thoughts on it: where do you think Geten’s story might be going in the future, & do u think it’s possible Dabi will kill him? I saw ppl talking about Dabi’s noted distaste for him & how the PLF seems more of a temporary alliance in the LoV’s mind (Compress’ noted rejection of the name in his thoughts, Dabi’s use of Skeptic against his will, etc), & w/ AFO back in the picture they theorized Dabi may get his quirk & kill Geten.

Okay, so, it took me a while to grapple with this one, and in the end, I'm going to have to break my reply up into two parts. Because you asked a very simple question, anon, and my answer to the question you actually asked is pretty simple (if characteristically rambly)! But you also provided a bunch of contextualizing information about what prompted your ask, and I have a lot to say about that contextualizing information, stuff that is only tangentially related to your actual question.

Note that some of this is going to get pretty salty, but I assume you wouldn't have brought a Known MLA Stan a question like this if you didn't want at least a bit of that. Most of the salt will be in the second part, though! This first part is pretty safe!

So, to answer the actual question: I don't have a lot of solid thoughts on where Geten's story is going, because from the looks of the way the series as a whole is going, it may well be that the MLA’s story is already done. I have previously expressed concerns about the current status of the MLA mainly because of all the speculation that Horikoshi is trying to rush to get to the ending, and if Hori’s rushing the ending, I don’t know that I’d bet on Geten coming back at all. In fact, given what I can guess about the scenario, I’d kind of rather he not.

The thing is, the MLA have always been far more relevant to the League than they have been to anyone else in the cast. They’re Tomura's victory spoils; their plot beats were established to connect to the League, not the heroes, the students, or even All For One. There’s just no personal connection there, and lacking a personal connection, all they’d do is be fodder for background fights to fill page space and give the side characters something to do.

And there’s just no drama in that! Not even any tension! We've already seen the MLA characters beaten--first by the villains, and then by the heroes. Hell, we've seen Re-Destro beaten three times!(1) Based on how the raid went, there are maybe three people in the entire MLA that present a credible threat--Hose Face, whose name we don’t even know, Re-Destro, who has a repeatedly-illustrated weak point in the form of his new legs, and Geten.

While I definitely think Geten could give any of the students save Deku a run for their money,(2) what would be the point? Who would he be slotted in to have a dramatic fight with? Geten hurt Cementoss, but he didn't kill him, and none of the students are uniquely close to Cementoss anyway. Geten has never personally offended or harmed any of the kids directly. There was a time people theorized that Shouto's end game boss would be a combination of Geten and Dabi, but with the PLF scattered, that looks less likely.

From the other side of things, Geten himself has no particular beef with the kids. If he'd been on the front lines to witness the opening moments of the battle, maybe he'd have a bone to pick with Kaminari, Kinoko, Juzo, and particularly Tokoyami, but it took Geten a bit to get to the front; he has no particular way of knowing about those four, and at the moment, he certainly has more pressing matters on his mind.

Geten's primary interest, when it comes right down to it, is Re-Destro. He talks a big game about the MLA's goals, but when the pivotal moment comes in Deika, he bails on the battle that was assigned to him to try and help RD instead. He claims that pure strength is to be valued above all else, but his loyalties don’t change when Gigantomachia bats him aside like a fly or when Shigaraki proves himself to be An Strongest. Even up to Jakku, Geten is still concerned solely with Re-Destro. With no real reason to pit RD against the kids, there’s no reason to throw Geten against them, either.

The only person Geten has an established rivalry with is, of course, Dabi, but getting the two of them even in the same vicinity again is going to require breaking the MLA leaders out of jail, which clearly isn't a priority of AFO's, and he's the one running the show right now. Would Shigaraki bother? He might, particularly if RD, Trumpet and Geten all get shipped to whatever Tartarus Lite Mr. Compress and Machia are likewise bound for. But if the story is headed to its conclusion, is Shigaraki ever going to get that option?

Is AFO the final boss? If so, it doesn't seem to leave much of an opening for the MLA to become relevant again, because, again, the MLA are all about Tomura's victory, Tomura’s ascendant arc as a villain, his status as a hero to other villains (namely RD). If Deku "saving" Shigaraki from All For One is going to magically resolve all of Tomura's issues with society as a whole, because hey, at least this kid is a good person, so his society can't be so bad after all! (GAG), that doesn't seem to leave much room to get into the myriad issues with society that all of Tomura's followers have. Frankly, the only thing the MLA has to offer Deku right now that's remotely relevant to his current goals is Re-Destro's starry-eyed explanation about why he's fallen so hard for Shigaraki, and Spinner is better suited for that role on basically every level.

So that’s all been one big if. The other alternative is the ending I'm hoping we get, in which Deku and Shigaraki join forces to put an end to AFO, only for Shigaraki to thank Deku cordially and then get right back to destroying things because, surprise surprise, Midoriya Izuku being a good person doesn't absolve Hero Society of all of its many, many sins. Then I can see there being room for the MLA to return. At that point, not only is there RD’s devotion to Shigaraki on offer, but also the MLA’s ideology of Liberation, what it is, what it offers, along with, for example, more on whatever Harima Oji’s complaints were about heroes, more on what has to change systemically to satisfy Shigaraki’s grudge. That’s a story the MLA can meaningfully contribute to, and therefore a story in which Geten and his quirk supremacist beliefs are more likely to be addressed.

However, I’m not optimistic that we’re going to get that ending, and until we find out whether Shigaraki will be satisfied with being rescued from AFO (if, indeed, he survives the process at all), or whether he and his compatriots’ societal issues will be left by the wayside, I’m not yet prepared to spend a lot of time theorizing on how the MLA’s role in it would look.

As to the specific question of Dabi killing Geten--honestly? I think that moment is past. While I said earlier that Dabi is Geten’s only established rivalry, that is frankly being more generous than their relationship actually warrants. After all, we haven’t seen them interact since Deika, and literally the only time one of them has so much as thought of the other in that period was Dabi grumbling, “That icy punk sure knows how to let loose,” after Geten’s big wall of ice attack allows Tokoyami to get away with Hawks. If their continued animosity were going to be a plot point, and especially if Dabi were going to murder him in cold blood eventually, Horikoshi should have shown us the two of them antagonizing each other as co-lieutenants of the Violet Regiment.

At this point, Dabi has made his big play, revealed his identity to the world. I think he's pretty locked into the Todoroki Drama now; he has bigger concerns than going back and winning a grudge match against Geten. Also too, given the point he's trying to prove about the strength of his/Endeavor's flames, would he even want Geten's quirk? If he were to get it, would he get the "evolved" version or just the basic one?(3) Because given the precedent set by both the mechanics of Monoma's Copy and AFO's comments about Jeanist's Fiber Master, I'd be inclined to think the latter, and Geten's ice powers are way less badass without the temperature control, especially for a dude trying to wield them in concert with flames of the temperature Dabi uses.

From a narrative standpoint, Geten has already been punished for his hubris with a personal defeat, the humbling of his leader, a loss of pride in his organization, and then a second, much more damning defeat and subsequent capture at the hands of heroes. Dabi taking his quirk and killing him at this point would just be kicking--indeed, killing--him when he’s already down. It doesn’t feel like karma; it just feels malicious.

That said, in the rather dubiously scaffolded scenario that the MLA gets free and finds their way back to the League and AFO/Shigaraki takes Geten's quirk(4) and Dabi accepts it, would Dabi then kill Geten with it?

…I mean, maybe? Do people think that Dabi is that much of a sadist? Because it would be the act of a sadist, to murder a kid who's almost certainly younger than he is and might even still be a teenager, one who has just been violently stripped of any ability to defend himself, all out of a desire for petty revenge over a months-old slight--a slight consisting of Geten parroting rhetoric he learned from the weird cult he grew up in, and which Dabi has very possibly been working with Skeptic long enough to know is maybe not all that accurate a characterization of the cult's ideals anyway!

And that brings me to Part 2. ---------------------------------------

(1) Four, if you count the clone’s destruction.

(2) Even 1-A's two remaining powerhouses don't present any more of a threat to Geten's ice than Dabi did, and Shouto will only give him more of it to work with. Their advantage over Dabi is that they can both sort of fly, which might well tip the balance--one of Geten's major advantages is his ability to manipulate ice from a considerable distance away, farther away than Dabi's flames can reach, but flying opponents deprive him of that advantage. Now, Shouto's flying is fairly unstable, so I suspect Geten is more maneuverable in the air, but his maneuverability wouldn't save him from Bakugou, the human equivalent of the anger-powered jetpack.

(3) Set aside the Doylist explanations about anyone who stole Geten's quirk getting the version the audience already knows purely out of laziness, forgetfulness, or authorial fiat.

(4) And look me dead in the eye and tell me Geten would just let Shigaraki Tomura or anything currently inhabiting his body just casually stroll up and lay hands on him without protest. Not to say I think AFOmura couldn't do it, but doing it in a "cool," dramatic way would probably involve some lightning movements we have not seen him make thus far.

#bnha #stillness answers #geten #meta liberation army #dabi

[bigskydreaming]

Hello, hello, tis I, your friendly neighborhood ‘dude who is obsessed with people making jokes and insults out of Dick’s name’ back with another episode of Why No But Seriously Why!

In today’s episode, we’re going to focus on the fanon of the swear jar. That thing ordained by Alfred that makes many an appearance in fics and headcanons....including ones that also show Jason and/or others calling Dick a Dickhead and other things all willy nilly and suchlike and forthwith.

How does this track, asketh I? Does Alfred provide exemption clauses for making fun of your brother, to the others? Does Alfred not consider making crude insults out of the name Dick to be a swear? Does Alfred, a born Brit, hailing from the land of the “We’ve Been Calling Richards ‘Dicks’ For Longer Than The Rest Of You Have Been Calling Them Rich’s,” not consider the fascination with making penis jokes out of the name of a child he’s helped raised from the age of EIGHT to be uncultured, crass and frankly unacceptable in any house he resides in?

I’m just saying, does it really make sense, and is the risk of pulling readers out of your story if they’re NOT amused by the jokes made of his name really worth whatever it is you feel is added to a story BY making the same old jokes about Dick’s name?

As I’ve said many times before....Dick Grayson? Fictional character. Has no feelings that actually need protecting....OUTSIDE of fiction. Making jokes about his name from beyond the fourth wall, just people commenting on a fictional character’s name? Go wild, go crazy, have a freaking Bacchanalia. Truly does not matter, if you ask me.

But IN universe? IN fiction? Totally different story, because look what those jokes require or make assumptions out of:

1) That Dick truly has no protective or defensive feelings whatsoever about his childhood nickname, and genuinely feels nothing about people habitually taking his choice to keep it as an invitation to insult or mock him.

1b) That Dick doesn’t in any way ever perceive peoples’ insistence on associating his name MORE with the insults and penis jokes than they do with it just being a name, to in any way be a slight against his beloved parents, of the “well they should have known better than to call him that” variety.

1c) That Dick has no negative feelings whatsoever about the fact that even his close friends and family regard his name as being no more worthy of respect or being ‘offlimits’ than the average Gothammite or public citizen might regard it, despite the fact that his close friends and family are perfectly aware of the public’s history of looking down on Dick for his origins and thus you’d think would WANT to appear different than them in Dick’s eyes.

1d) That Dick has never at any point expressed anger, frustration or bitterness that he can’t even have his name respected without even loved ones superimposing their own associations on top of it, no matter what it means to HIM.

2) That Alfred truly has no opinions whatsoever of the other charges in his care disrespecting Dick’s name and its origins stemming from his first parents.

2b) That Alfred has never expressed this opinion to any of them or made his displeasure about such jokes known.

2c) That Alfred doesn’t find it disappointing that the rest of the family and associated friends and allies seem disinclined to separate themselves from the general public’s opinions of Dick’s name by regarding it with a little more respect as at least a sign that they regard Dick himself with a little more respect than the general public.

3) That Jason or none of Dick’s other friends or family have never taken the initiative to wonder for themselves how Dick might actually feel about the frequent jokes or insults, and if shockingly, he might not actually be fond of them.

3b) That Jason or Dick’s other friends or family have chosen not to care or respect the opinions of Dick and/or Alfred or anyone else who states or suggests that these jokes or insults aren’t welcome.

4) That none of Dick’s other friends, be they Titans, or Uncle Clark, or siblings like Cass or Damian or frankly anyone, ever speak up in defense of Dick’s name and suggest that there’s a significant lack of respect around it and thus around him, that they personally take a very dim view of. (Even when Jason’s best friends include Dick’s former fianceé and own longtime BFF).

5) That nobody has ever bothered to think that only EVER being addressed by some form of insult by even his own siblings might possibly have a slightly demoralizing effect on someone’s self-esteem over time.

5b) That nobody has ever bothered to think that making sexual jokes about his name and thus innately sexualizing Dick from even his earliest days in Gotham, when coupled with the hyper-sexualized stereotypes people often apply to Romani individuals and further coupled with the suggestive rumors surrounding Bruce’s reasons for taking in a young boy, might possibly have contributed over time to Dick having an extremely skewed view of himself as an innately sexualized being no matter what he actually did in terms of sexual behavior.

I mean.....there’s more. If I felt like it.

But the point is......there’s a LOT of implicit assumptions that creep in alongside the seemingly harmless jokes and insults surrounding Dick’s name, the second you start to really focus in on how it might appear from his POV....IF you include even just the possibility that he DOESN’T like it.

EDIT: Also, lots of people have pointed out that its just sibling culture to make fun of a sibling in ways that you wouldn’t be okay with someone outside the family making the same jokes. And this is absolutely true! BUT. My issue here and why I don’t think the Dickhead jokes fall under this umbrella, is because I can say in my experience being from a blended family, and from what I’ve discussed in the past with other kids from blended families....there are ‘rules’ about this sort of thing, when you have adopted siblings, and the one near-universal truth that I’ve always found is that anything that stems from an adopted sibling’s first family, the one you do NOT share with them, is absolutely off limits. You mock them for something that originated outside your family, you’re the asshole, because at that point, you’re literally no different from outsiders to your current family making fun of that sibling. That ‘joke’ is not YOURS to make or share in, if you do not have the history with the thing you’re basing the joke on, that your sibling has with it. Shared history is the entire basis of siblings being able to mock each other while still citing solidarity against outsiders, and in adopted families, there absolutely are elements of each others’ lives that YOU are the outsider to, and it absolutely falls on you to respect that just as you’d want your sibling to respect the same of you in turn. If Jason absolutely would not be okay with Dick or anyone else making jokes about Catherine or his life with her, he should not be okay with making jokes about Dick’s name, circus origins, or other aspects of his life that stem from or call back to his time with his first family. The same holds true of all the others as well.

The other aspect of this name-calling not falling under the excuse-umbrella of just being typical sibling culture is its entirely one-sided. Show me the tendency where Dick responds to these everpresent jokes or insults by even light-heartedly calling Jason and the others insults like Hey Asshole, or Dumbass or anything like that. When things are entirely one-way, the impression given is not that of a camaraderie of back-and-forth. It becomes just one person or multiple people punching down in a way they feel confident from experience the other person will NOT respond in kind, which gives them an outlet for venting frustration, resentment or aggravation which risks them nothing, because they KNOW Dick won’t retaliate, and at that point that exchange becomes something very different from a general sibling back-and-forth....because there’s no ‘back.’ What you end up with at that point is literally just hostility, no matter if more mild than other cases, and a situation where one sibling is simply taking ADVANTAGE of the opportunity afforded by another sibling’s good nature and refusal to engage in hurt feelings even while you feel free to cause those feelings in them. And that’s just not a good look. Its just not. And even if you find those exchanges humorous yourself as a writer or a reader, you might want to keep in mind that to plenty of other readers, its making even the characters you like and INTEND to be liked, just....come across as kinda not cool assholes instead.

END OF EDIT.

And here’s the other point:

Its not really about his name, and never has been.

His name is simply emblematic of how EASY it is for people to fall into the trap of just....choosing to overlook Dick’s POV entirely, the second its pitted against other characters and what they might gain from their POV....even if that ‘gain’ is as simple and basic as the slight moment of humor Jason gets from making a joke or mocking insult out of Dick’s name.

Here, let me present this another way:

Every single person alive has SOMETHING they get defensive or protective about. SOMETHING that they’re like no, this is offlimits to people, this is not for their consumption, their entertainment, its not for THEM to take and twist into something other than what it is for ME, because its MINE. This is basic human nature. EVERYONE has this feeling about SOMETHING that’s particular to them.

And with Dick, most of the things that we’re generally given to view him being protective or defensive about are either almost more about other people than him - such as being protective of his family members - or else, they’re things that he’s not ALLOWED to be purely defensive or say, territorial about.

Like for instance, the name Robin.

Think about how Robin is pretty much one of the ONLY things Dick is largely deemed to be defensive or proprietary about.....BUT how that’s also largely used NOT to have him wholly in the right for feeling that way.....but to put him in conflict with the other Robins, given that they also have strong feelings about the name regardless of its origins, and its not solely Dick’s anymore.

Now here’s my question:

If for example, you go with the take that Robin was Dick’s mother’s name for him, and that’s why Dick is so protective and defensive of that name.....why would he be any LESS protective or defensive about his mother AND father’s OTHER name for him....given that the only possible reason for him TO stick with the name Dick all throughout adulthood, is that its the form of his name they referred to him by, and thus, clearly, it DOES carry emotional significance for him?

See what I’m saying?

Why is it, that the only time so many people see Dick laying a claim to something, being defensive or protective of something that’s HIS, standing up for HIMSELF.....is when the waters are murky, when its not a clear cut case of him being wholly in the right, when it pits Dick against someone else and says both are at least somewhat valid?

Why is it so RARE to see people imagine Dick putting his foot down in defense of himself, in defense of something that’s HIS.....where its 100% crystal clear that he has every right and reason in the world to feel this way, where there’s no doubt whatsoever that he’s on the correct side of thinking “this is mine and I get to say this”?

Even about something as simple and basic as his own name?

And why is it the only time we seem to see people sticking up for Dick or weighing in on his behalf, its in the case of extreme actions like him having been raped or abused? Why are there hardly any stories of people looking at alleged family and friends bitching about Dick or heaping insults on him or his capabilities and saying hey, he’s been doing this while most of us were sitting in middle school detention, you could show him some respect? Why do none of the people who value and respect Dick so highly ever seem to weigh in like THAT in stories?

My challenge, should you choose to accept it, is just to look at the above list of possible reasons why Dick might not be thrilled about how people use his name....and just IMAGINE what it would look like, if Dick just said to another character....”Hey. Could you cut that out. I would appreciate it if you didn’t do that.” Even just “I really don’t like that.”

How does a scene like that go? One where Dick is wholly and completely justified in putting his foot down, in feeling that someone is overstepping or paying him an insult or a disservice?

We hear all the time in fandom about how in the name of ‘humanizing’ Dick and ‘making him more relatable’ some people focus overly much on emphasizing his flaws, his alleged temper, his secretiveness, etc.

I’d like to argue that flaws are not actually the only staple of humanity. Risking making a character more dislikable is not actually the only way to make them feel more human or relatable. THIS is another way to do that. Make them defensive, proprietary, territorial, even prickly.....but with REASON. With CAUSE. With JUSTIFICATION. Because people are ALLOWED to be, when people are being a - all irony intended - total dick to them.

And there is a long, LONG history in fanfics, of people being exactly that to Dick, and him just....smiling.

EXCEPT for when his choice NOT to smile, and to actually take offense and push back......pits him against another character but with the other character usually being granted just as much right and reason to not give way.

So? I’m saying you have right here a perfect example of how to flip the script on that. To make it abundantly clear that Dick has just as much right to put his foot down with even people who love and care about him and say hey, you’re doing something I don’t like, that in fact even hurts me, and I want you to stop.

Why not use it? Why does there always seem to need to be an ARGUMENT about whether or not Dick is in the right to feel wronged in some way.....when its so abundantly clear that he’s given no shortage of reasons for that in practically every other fic?

And consider.....if you’ve never previously entertained the idea that Dick might take offense to how people treat his name, or feel defensive about it......what else might you be overlooking that he could feel that way about, and is there any reason why you think you tend not to view Dick as being defensive of HIMSELF and things that are uniquely his?

*Shrugs* Just food for thought, mayhaps.

[anon-e-miss]

OMG, that was such a sad mama!Prowl... poor thing I hope at some point you write a happier follow up to that fic. I hate seeing Prowl and Smokey so sad... I also look forward to this coming week! I hope you enjoy it.

Crosscut and Road Rage were dead. As much as Prowl loathed these mechanisms with every fibre of his being, he could not celebrate their demises. He remained in the nursery, the collection of rooms that had made up his existence for fifty-six vorns. Nothing had changed here, not yet. His elder creations needed help with their school work while their younger siblings needed support and attention as they learned numbers and shapes and speech. They did not appear to notice the loss of their progenitors but then Road Rage had never visited the nursery or seen the femmeling she had sired on Prowl, and Crosscut had come maybe four times in Smokescreen’s entire life. When he had deemed it time to put another newspark in Prowl, it had been Prowl who had gone to him. Those dark-cycles were the only times Prowl had left the nursery since kindling with Smokescreen where he had been bred in Crosscut’s berth and then sent on his way.

There was no relief in the knowledge that he would never go to that berth again. Prowl adjusted Bluestreak against his chassis as his newest creation lost his latch and complained bitterly for it. His protoform was still thin and soft. Prowl had only given him emergence the previous quartex, only an orn before he had learned of Crosscut and Road Rage’s deaths. He was reading the younger sparklings, Flash, Streetstar and Strongarm a story as the elders worked on their coursework. Smokescreen was a good help with Camshaft’s math and Downshift’s reading. He had become a singularly dutiful brother and creation and Prowl felt guilt for depending on him. It would not be much longer now. When he received his youngling upgrades, Smokescreen would leave the nursery, and he would not come back. The grand door opened and Prowl’s mouth  went dry. Smokescreen was still a six quartexes from his emergence-cycle. He still had six quartexes in the nursery.

Prowl recognized one of the mechs, Sideways was his brother in law. He suppressed a shiver of revulsion. Crosscut’s ownership of Prowl’s fertility would have been passed to his brother by Praxian inheritance laws. They had met before Prowl had been bought and sold, during that brief period of Prowl’s life when his path had been his to choose. Sideways had been the model for every negative stereotype one might have of an enforcers, and Prowl doubted anything had changed. Though he actually did not know. Crosscut had never shared gossip with him. His time in Crosscut’s presence had served one and only one purpose. There had hardly been any talking. The things said had not been things Prowl had wanted to hear. Just demeaning scrap that had filled Prowl with impudent hate.

Seeing Sideways exhausted Prowl. He found himself mentally cursing at the prospect of laying under this mech and bearing him creations with even more fervour that he had Crosscut. For all he had hated that mech, he had been the devil he had known. Now Prowl was in the merciless servos of fate and he did not enjoy it. This was not the life he wanted, to be passed on to the beneficiary of Crosscut’s estate, and perhaps then on to the next. Prowl had take great care to hide his receptive status from the moment he had learned of it. If he had never been shot, the medic would never have had cause to look and Prowl’s life would still be his own.

“Start packing,” Sideways said. No greeting, no exchange of sympathy. None of that was especially startling, but the order was.

“Why?” Prowl had never learned to stop asking questions. He had never learned to serenely embrace his fate. It did not matter how many times his ownership changed servos, Prowl did not believe he would ever know that kind of serenity.

“You’re being passed to the Warlord of Polihex to pay my brother’s energon debt. Pack up whatever you can transport. The caravan will here in three mega-cycles.”

“What about my creations?”

“They’re going with you,” Sideways sneered. “I sure as Pit don’t want them.”

***

This would have been the perfect opportunity to make his escape, but Prowl looked around the opulent trailer letting his optics fall on each of his creations. He had not wanted to carry even one of them, yet he could not imagine leaving them. Even though he had struggled to bond with Bluestreak as he had carried him in his forge, Prowl could not imagine pulling the newling from his line and jumping from their transport and fleeing across the dunes. The love he had for them was a cage he could not break free from. Acknowledging the reality only depressed Prowl further. He stared out at the dunes as he and his creations were carted off into the unknown.

It was a long journey, and his sparklings grew quickly tired of their confinement. Their whole lives had been the nursery, and the little high walled garden off of the patio. But this trailer was a fraction of the size of their nursery had been and they were chomping at the bit to be freed. They would not be free until they were grown, and even then the course of their lives would be written upon the reading of their sparks. That at least would have been the case in Praxus. Perhaps Polihex, a land of brigands and nomads, offered mechanisms more freedoms, or perhaps their receptive mechanisms spent their entire lives in red tents.

As the sun set and the moons rose Prowl watched as their caravan rolled up to another with carpets spread out over the sand, tents set up in a ring,  and a great many fires burnings. His creations all but covered him. They had fought and they had cried but eventually they had become too tired and too bored to do anything but recharge. The trailer rolled to a stop. His sparklings stirred but remained in recharge. Prowl crained his helm to look out the window. He watched as mechanisms rose up from the carpets and spoke with the caravan’s driver. Fireflight cast interesting shadows on the faces of the mechanisms who had been disturbed from their rest.

Tent flaps were thrown open and a newcomer approached. Everyone inclined their helms to the yellow and blue mech. Prowl turned his helm as Smokescreen sat up, and then knelt on the bench to look out the window with him. When he looked back, he locked optics with the newcomer. A klik later the doors to the trailer were thrown open. The sparklings woke with a start. They clung to him as the newcomer stepped into the trailer. Prowl rumbled his engine in a low decimal level in hopes of soothing them without drawing unnecessary attention. The yellow and blue mech stared at him.

“How many o’ these bitlets were stolen from their origins?” The mech asked in thickly accented Neo Cybex.

“None,” the driver said with surprise. “The prize is the origin.”

“Ya adopted any o’ these bitlets?” The newcomer asked.

“No,” Prowl replied. Faintly surprised that he himself had been asked the question. “I carried each of my creations.”

“Six” The mech said after he counted the mechlings. Then he corrected himself. “Seven... That is... something.”

Prowl did not flinch at the mech’s tone though he bristled internally at the judgment in it. Bearing seven creations had not been his choice, and he did not appreciate being spoken down to for this lot. At Prowl’s side, Smokescreen’s doorwings twitched up and Prowl rumbled his engine again. The low octave tone still at a soothing effect on Smokescreen. Would it after he got his upgrades? Prowl did not know. It was all he could do to hope he would have the opportunity to find out.

“Lord Straxus was real excited ‘bout that,” the driver revealed. “He only e’er sired the one off his harem ‘n that wasn’t for lack of tryin’.”

“Of course,” the newcomer sneered. “Well, get up. Easier to recharge if you stretch your legs a bit.”

“This one’s run before,” the driver argue as he stretched out his arms to ensure Prowl did not get by him, not that he made any attempt. “Straxus don’t wanna lose’m to the dunes.”

“Straxus is dead,” the yellow and blue mech replied. “Jazz is Warlord now, let’em off.”

“But...”

“Are ya really gonna tell me ya think ya know better what Jazz would want?”

“No... no Punch.”

“That’s what I thought. Come on, off, the lot of ya. Let’s get some fuel in ya.”

Prowl did not know who Jazz was but he sounded infinitely better than Straxus. Though that could have been nothing but a naive hope. The nap his sparklings had taken would make it difficult to get them down again, some exercise would do them could, some fuel as well. They had not been given energon for a few joors; the driver did not like stopping so the sparklings could relieve their waste tanks so he was sparing with fuel.  Smokescreen picked up Flash. The youngest of Prowl’s sparklings was too wild to be trusted. Prowl cradled Bluestreak to his chassis and extrended his servo to Camshaft. Camshaft held Downshift’s servo, and Downshift, Streetstar’s and Streetstar, Strongarm’s. Prowl watched as the mech the driver had called Punch helped Smokescreen down. Though Prowl was anxious to do it, he allowed Punch to lift each sparkling down, after he told them to stay close to Smokescreen. Their optics were all wide and owlish. They would likely have stayed close even without Prowl’s instructions.

“Watch yer step,” Punch cautioned Prowl. “Y’ll sit wit me by the fire.”

It was a command rather than a request. Prowl acquiesced because he was much too happy to be out of the trailer to argue with Punch. A new fire was lit by the carpets stretched out in front of the tent Punch had left. Before they could even reach it, a mech left a trailed filled with fuel on the carpet. There were no plates, Prowl imagined they were meant to share. Certainly it was different than anything that would have been tolerated in Praxus but Prowl was not inclined to judge the Polihexians for it.  He was grateful for this small taste of freedom, to sit on a carpet in the wilderness without a single wall around them. It would only be a brief reprieve but it was more than he had had in vorns.

“Take whate’r ya like,” Punch ordered. “There’s lots to share”

“Thank you for your hospitality,” Prowl said. “We have not left the trailer for more than a few kliks in many mega-cycles.”

“Y’re welcome,” Punch said. “Will ya tell me yer designations?”

“I am Prowl. My eldest is Smokescreen. These two beside me are Camshaft and Downshift. My twins are Strongarm and Streetstar. My little one is Flash and my newling is Bluestreak.”

“Ya have a strong spark to carry so many, and close together at that.”

“I suppose.”

Smokescreen served as gopher for his siblings and origin. He handed out gelled fuels and candied crystals before he took any for himself. The sparklings ate, they were hungry as they had the right to be. They took their time, distracted from their fuel to some extent by the strange sights and smells. When Smokescreen looked up at the stars and say transfixed at the sight of the constellations, Punch told him what the Polihexians called them. The younger sparklings followed Punch’s digit as he pointed up at the sky and told them stories. Bluestreak woke and immediately went for his origin’s well, Prowl bared it for him.

As his newling nursed, Prowl listened to the stories. Some of the constellations had different names in Prowl, but he had never seen them this clear. It was pleasant to sit back and listen to the stories. Though Bluestreak could not possibly see the constellations, Prowl cradled him so that he could star watch like his siblings once he had drunk his fill. Shrill cries broke their peace. Punch rose quickly and returned to his tent. The sound had Prowl’s chassis throb and his drained fuel lines fill. It was a familiar sound.

Punch returned a short time later, two newlings similar in age to Bluestreak in his arms. He seemed weary as he cradled them on his lap and tried to convince them to latch on the nozzles of bottles filled with pink fuel. In the glow of the fire they seemed ashen to Prowl, sickly and weak as they waved their servos and cried. Punch crooned at them in a dialect that Prowl did not understand. He sounded anxious to Prowl, though he could not be certain. With each passing klik they refused the bottles, and Prowl’s chassis became painful full.

“They do not like bottles?” Prowl asked, tentatively.

“Less the bottles ‘n more the machadron energon,” Punch replied. “But it’s all we got for ‘em. Their origin was dead before I found’m. Straxus didn’t get’m a medic when the evacuation went wrong. Rust took’m. Or that’s what the guards told me when I found’m.”

“I am sorry.”

“That’s why Straxus’ dead. Because he botnapped Free Wheeler ‘n let’m die. Jazz is half mad as it is, I don’t wanna tell’m I couldn’t save his bitties too.”

“Give them to me,” Prowl said, laying Bluestreak in his lap. “I have fuel enough in my well.”

“Please,” Punch replied. “No one in the camp has a drop to give’em. Mine dried up vorns ago.”

Gingerly he gave the sickly newlings to Prowl, one at a time. It took surprisingly little effort to convince the first, a red mechling to latch, though only weakly. As he suckled, energon flowed through Prowl’s nozzle and into the newling’s mouth and he suddenly suckled harder. Prowl took the second. This was had no use for him, but Prowl was patient. He rumbled his engine in that low octave purr he had learned with Smokescreen, and as the yellow newling’s temper was soothed he started to suckle, and energon flowed into his famished little frame. As they nursed, Prowl stroked their helms and crooned softly at them, and patiently endured their frantic suckling.

“Y’re a miracle from Primus,” Punch declared. “I don’t know how to repay you.”

“Tell me what you know of Jazz?” Prowl asked as he glanced up from the newlings. His sparklings crawled over to look at the strange newlings. The sight of their origin nursing a newling was common place for them, but the newlings had only ever been their siblings. Smokescreen took Bluestreak from Prowl’s lap so he could relax a little more and rocked his littlest brother. He looked to Punch as Prowl asked the question. His answers would affect all of them.

“He’s a good mech,” Punch replied. “I see why ya’d have a need to know. I spose ya were promised to the Warlord, ‘n not just Straxus himself.”

“I was told I was being given to the Warlord of Polihex to pay restitution for Crosscut’s misdeed. I never heard a designation mentioned. I do not know that Sideways would have bothered to know it.”

“This Crosscut was yer Conjunx.”

“We were not bonded,” Prowl replied. “Crosscut owned my fertility, that is all.”

“I don’t understand,” Punch said.

“Bondings are reserved for receptive mechanisms who accept their duty. They are afforded some freedoms, the ability to walk the streets, to visit shops and theatres. I forged my medical records, and hid that my spark is receptive for many vorns. My deception was uncovered and my fertility was bought and sold. As I needed to be compelled to do my duty, I was not afforded the dignity of bonding.”

“‘N they call us savage,” Punch hissed. “Love, ya won’t be caged here. That ain’t our way.”

“You cannot speak for Jazz.”

“Oh, I can, to a point. He’s my bitlet ‘n I know his spark as only an origin can.”

“You are his origin? You run this caravan?”

“Bein’ receptive, bein’ an origin don’t cost ya yer freedom here, Prowl. Payment or no, ya won’t be a breedin’ slave to my creation. That ain’t our way, ‘n it ain’t his way.”

#anon-e-miss writes #maccadam #tf prowl #tf punch #barbarian au #tw forced pregnancy #tw forced marriage #tw abuse #dark praxus #kid!fic #mechpreg

[mst3kproject]

Atlas in the Land of the Cyclops

Here we have a movie with a big, brawny hero in a very short skirt, whose hobbies include drinking potions, napping, and bending prison bars!  He stars in a film that is poorly-made, mythologically questionable, and deliciously ripe for heckling.  What more could a MSTie possibly want?

Long ago, Ulysses blinded the cyclops and outsmarted the witch Circe, and they’re still pissed about it.  As the movie begins, they’re on the verge of completing their revenge by murdering Ulysses’ last descendants.  The last king of Ithaca is killed in a raid, but his young son is smuggled away and left in the care of an old shepherd.  Upon hearing of the slaughter, Maciste goes to the land of Sadok to save Queen Penope and the other women of Ithaca, who have been taken captive by Circe’s descendant, Queen Capys.  On the way he saves Capys from a rockslide and they fall in love, each not knowing who the other is… which goes on to make things very awkward later.  Nobody in the movie is called ‘Atlas’.

Nobody Named Atlas Goes Anywhere Near the Land of the Cyclops is a bit oddly put-together.  Theoretically the plot – the need to protect baby Prince MacGuffin from Queen Capys’ soldiers – is established quickly, but then it seems to take a while before anybody makes any progress.  This is because a lot of the early plot developments happen by complete accident.

After making sure the baby is safe, Maciste sets out for Sadok.  He quickly finds out where Capys is keeping the Ithacan prisoners, but this isn’t clever detective work – it’s just a coincidence, when some soldiers ask him to help them carry a giant amphora into the palace.  Meanwhile, Capys has been told that somebody named Maciste knows where Baby MacGuffin is, and orders her soldiers to find this man and bring him in alive.  Her Vizier, Ephetus, does so – but again, it’s an accident!  He arrests Maciste for wandering into ‘The Forest of the Vestals’ and sentences him to death for that before ever learning his name!

Once Maciste is in Capys’ custody the movie finally seems to figure out where it’s going, but this over-reliance on coincidence makes the first half of Nobody Named Atlas Goes Anywhere Near the Land of the Cyclops feel very muddled.  The only thing that really needs to be an accident to make the plot work is Maciste and Capys meeting in Circe’s cavern without knowing they’ve already sworn to destroy each other.  Following that with more coincidences feels like filling time.

The bit where Maciste is arrested is really weird, actually.  The Vestals appear to be playing Blind Man’s Bluff, and Maciste just wanders into the middle of it.  The blindfolded woman bumps into him and feels up his pecs for a moment while he stands there grinning awkwardly, then she pulls her blindfold off, screams, and faints.  Soldiers then run out of the bushes and arrest Maciste.

So that was odd… then there’s the way Ephetus decides to have Maciste executed for harassing the Vestals. They put him on a board over a lion pit (every ancient kingdom has a lion pit) and tie a long rope to each of his wrists.  Then six white guys in green skirts pull on one rope, and six black guys in white skirts pull on the other.  Eventually, of course, Maciste overpowers both teams and everybody but him gets to be Fancy Feast.  Only once that’s all over does Ephetus realize that this is the guy the queen wants delivered to her alive.

There’s other weird shit that goes on, too.  In another sequence, Maciste is getting his ass beat by Ephetus’ flunky Mumba (Paul Wynter from Mole Men Against the Son of Hercules, still buffer and oilier than the guy playing Maciste) and, having recently been drugged, is barely able to fight back.  He gets a second wind when Mumba throws him against another giant amphora, which breaks, dousing him in wine.  Maciste blinks a few times, and then suddenly becomes unstoppable.  Was it the alcohol, or the blow to the head?  There’s a truth serum that is administered by pouring it into an enormous wine goblet… and this isn’t just a thing for Maciste, either, everybody in this movie drinks booze from glasses the size of their own head. Nor can we forget the guy who gets thrown overboard from a ship, and out of nowhere a shark just appears and eats him immediately.

None of these are a full-on WTF Moment but all of them are kind of bizarre and many of them got a laugh out of me.  A lot of them also tie in to the movie’s main obsession, which is Maciste’s Feats of Strength.

We are treated to many of these, all of which go on a little too long.  They are filmed in loving detail, particularly focusing on the muscles in Maciste’s back, which are so well delineated that they almost comprise an anatomy lesson. We get the obligatory lion-wrestling scene (totally separate from the later lion pit scene), in which we are relieved to learn that yes, Maciste does have underwear beneath that miniskirt.  We get him holding up a stone roof that’s threatening to collapse, there’s the giant amphora and the inevitable prison bars, all while Maciste makes some very constipated faces.

My favourite bit is when Maciste rolls a giant boulder into the middle of a road so the soldiers can’t follow him.  What makes it funny is that this is clearly not the first take: the boulder has been rolled repeatedly, and there are places where the paint has come off to show the white Styrofoam underneath.

All this emphasis on Maciste’s rippling trapezius muscles makes the movie feel just a tad homoerotic.  One shot where the camera pans slowly around Maciste’s body while Capys walks a circle around him could be an attempt to depict the female gaze – a very rare thing in movies.  But I don’t know what to tell you about the Maciste-vs-Mumba fight scene, which is either trying very hard to be sexy or else I’m just looking through tumblr-coloured glasses again.

The climactic battle with the cyclops is pretty great.  The cyclops is played by a normal-sized stuntman made to look like a giant through camera angles, which means that Maciste can never be in the same shot with him. There are ways to do this well but Nobody Named Atlas Goes Anywhere Near the Land of the Cyclops does not use those – instead we just get some really funny jump cuts.

According to the movie, the reason Queen Capys wants to carry out her ancestress’ revenge on Ulysses is because until it is complete, she is under a curse.  Capys herself describes this as being ‘forced to live in hatred’, but it is very unclear what this means.  Early on, Ephetus confesses his love for Capys and she replies that she doesn’t know what the word means – this made me think perhaps her curse was an inability to fall in love.  A few minutes later, however, she has laid eyes on Maciste and his sheer manliness thaws her icy loins in a matter of seconds.  So… is her curse supposed to be that her subjects hate her?  They hate her because she keeps feeding them to a cyclops!  She could stop that at any time!  Her curse can’t be that nobody can love her, because Ephetus and Maciste both do!

I mentioned that Nobody Named Atlas Goes Anywhere Near the Land of the Cyclops shares an actor – Paul Wynter – with Mole Men Against the Son of Hercules.  It also shares a director, Antonio Leonviola (he also made Thor and the Amazon Women, the movie that runs over the opening credits of Cave Dwellers).  Maybe that’s why both movies have an evil queen who is supposed to be redeemed by her love for Maciste.  You may recall that I didn’t think Mole Men did this very well – Halismuya continued torturing people even after her supposed change of heart.  Land of the Cyclops does a bit better.

We don’t actually get an impression of Capys’ journey, but we do see the beginning and end of it.  As the movie begins, she’s callously throwing victims to the cyclops and looking forward to breaking her curse by killing Ulysses’ last two descendants.  At the end she sacrifices her life trying to save Baby MacGuffin despite knowing that it means she will never be free.  Her motivations for switching sides are unclear – she says that knowing Maciste has ‘changed her nature’ but we don’t ever see him trying to convince her that this child deserves to live.  She does remark that when she’s with Maciste she’s ‘only a woman’ rather than a queen… so maybe he brought out her maternal instincts?

I also don’t know what Ephetus’ determination to kill Queen Penope along with her son is all about.  She’s not a descendant of Ulysses, but he actually puts off killing Baby MacGuffin – the thing he believes his queen wants him to do – until he has identified the child’s mother.  The movie also never explains why this kid, whose father was the king of somewhere else entirely, apparently has the right to succeed Capys as ruler of Sadok.

Nobody Named Atlas Goes Anywhere Near the Land of the Cyclops is a pretty lousy movie, but it’s a fun lousy movie. It’s kinda racist and kinda sexist, but no more so than a thousand other movies of its vintage.  The only complaint I might have about its entertainment value is that it needed more crappy monsters.  The cyclops is pretty bad, but he doesn’t show up until the very end. Fortunately, the rest of the movie has plenty of other stupid shit to fill it out.

#mst3k #reviews #episodes that never were #my cheese steak #atlas in the land of the cyclops #nobody named atlas goes anywhere near the land of the cyclops #60s