#and my dad isnt even like oh im so sorry or anything he literally just. oh lol if it makes you feel better i gave half to the dog 🤪🤪😋!!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

malinelle · 3 months

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the thing with the breakdancing dad thing is like . for clarify i am in almost the same situation as ppl think shes in i was raised by my mom who was financially neglecting me and cutting my dad off from me when he wanted to see me and she was taking the child support money he was paying her to spend on herself i am the person who is the most in a position to sympathize with him but like i just dont. bec okay

that wasnt that many videos and the fact that its all holidays and special events isnt at all contradictory with 'he was there for some big events but he wasnt There in our lives', and the fact that this is also just like how home videos tend to work makes them really not convincing "evidence" of a happy childhood. like were u expecting to see videos of her saying she fucking hates her dad and hes never there for her To The Camera. when i was with my moms side of the family obviously you smile for pictures and act cute in front of the camera bc they get mad at you if you dont! also hes REALLY invading their privacy by posting videos that arent even of her and are instead of his other kids who literally have nothing to do with this. ALSO childhood evidence is always going to be skewed in the parent's favor bc the kid straight up isnt old enough to rly be able to advocate for themselves. notice how the videos switch to photos as she gets older meaning we have no idea how they interacted when they talked and the one text message she shows is them interacting rly awkwardly like two distant acquaintances

man fuck this dude for calling it "brainwashing". like Again it literally happened to me my mom was lying to me to steal money that was meant for us but he could just. say that. the concrete thing she did wrong. instead of being like It Was The Genders.

theres no proof that he paid anything. he said millions but like he just said that. people can lie. very silly and quirky that he has video evidence of his 10 yr old kid talking about youtube as definitive proof he was a loving father but he cant figure out how to censor one of the bajillion emails they send you when you pay medical bills. tbc i dont rly think he shouldve posted either bc again sensitive information but if youre gonna doxx your kids at least do it in a way that looks less like youre trying to use unreliable footage to make an emotional appeal over the Factual Innacuracies. same thing with screenshots of all the insane bitchy things your daughter and wife are totally saying

the most damning thing: dude you have your daughters phone number. if you really had a good relationship and she was exaggerating to make a story funnier you wouldve messaged her like "??? we made lasagna together last week why didnt you tell me i abandoned you at your mothers doorstep" and she wouldve been like "im sorry father i sold you out for views" and then she wouldve made a video breaking keyfabe. personally i dont believe women are insane gender-brainwashed lunatics so i figure she had her reasons

he stresses their politics differ a lot so my actual projection is that i figure madi as a kid was fine with her dad only showing up for holidays and not really being around and wasnt really thinking about money stuff but then as she grew up she started re-examining their relationship and drifted away from him as he became a sexist bitcoin breakdancer and so eventually she had a negative enough view of him to make a pretty uncharitable video bc if you and your dad had a huge argument over him being a sexist bitcoin breakdancer and then you saw a tiktok challenge about funny trauma you might very well think "oh man. the fact that my dad divorced my mom and then started a breakdancing career is funny as hell. im going to flatten this fairly complicated family history to fit into a tiktok" and then when her dad who she doesnt like anymore made a public response she doubled down bc fuck that guy he hates women. its not like shes sending hitmen to his front door she made a mean tiktok. ppl are acting like this has destroyed his reputation but im gonna go out on a limb and say that the ppl making fun of him for being a deadbeat dad are probably not ppl who otherwise wouldve been fans of a sexist bitcoin breakdancer. i think his core audience was never gonna be shattered by this which i am more sure of bc even before he posted a reply bitcoin bros were gathering around him like protective mother birds. if he didnt want his daughter to disrespect him and re-examine his treatment of her as an adult with a more critical eye, personally i would suggest he be nicer to his daughter and not call her brainwashed or talk about how its all genders fault. i think that would really help convince her to have a more positive view of him

#泳帽

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lilicohirukoma · 1 year

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vent post. underage mutuals pls dont read and interact w this, its not necessarily 18+ but yall are kids and shouldnt be concerned/bothered by my issues, I’m an adult.

fuck my mom, she KNOWS i dont like her new ‘boyfriend’ (he wont commit to her but she keeps trying to appease to him, even after going on a whole ‘spiritual journey’ and learning she needs to stop catering to others) but she still tries to force me to get along with him. like she made by birthday a whole ‘everyone meet my bf’ party when again she knows i dont like him, she was like ‘sorry but he wanted to’ LIKE ITS MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY BITCH. i know that makes me sound entitled and i dont fucking care.

ive tried to be nice about it, like when she is gone every night to be with him i dont complain and even say its okay but she also bring him here which basically forces me to wait until the early am’s to be able to eat dinner/drink anything that isnt tap water. also i have to piss in the shower if I dont want an UTI. w force i mean i have to do this to avoid a confrontation which i am doing at all costs.

and now shes just being malicious. ive been a fan of this band she introduced me to for a year now and the lead singer has invited me (and her) to come see him live and he said he’ll meet me and talk w me, i am of course super excited about it and now she’s saying her ‘bf’ has to come too. first she asked me if I would be okay w that and I said no, I literally told her I won’t go if he goes so what does she do? FUCKING INVITES HIM ANYWAY.

im sorry what the fuck is her problem, we had such a good day today and she just has to fucking explode it, it’s like she can’t accept when things are going well.

also while i’m at it stop fucking smoking in the house bitch, ive been asthmatic SINCE BIRTH, remember? you were literally there. shes all talking about ‘oh its my process/my way to deal with stress’ and its fine if it only involves you but your behavior is affecting multiple people.

where did she get all this fucking audacity from man, like she knows i have gone full no-contact with my dad’s side of the family, what makes her think she’s immune?

#vent #tw #idk for what but just incase ig #prob being a bit dramatic and over the top but i just need to get this out

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starlight-starwings · 1 year

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The Adventure Zone: Ethersea, Dust 2, and live shows quotes:

• Trees don't grow on trees!

• - Look at this stuff isnt it neat?

- Yes I think that your collection is complete now.

• - What I will also give you with a nat 20 is... harmarbahbahbahbah

- Excuse me what? I missed that last part

- Harnarbarbarbarbar.

- I dont see how that helps us but, thank you?

• - Zis has nothing to do wiz us!

- Okay. Tel me why. Then you explain it.

- Okay zo the magic coming from the zingularity, that we are going to collect, with, with this crystal, yes? Zis worm, uhh is not, by its nature, ze zingularity! Yes?

- Right but its probably got magic... all over it.

- No! No Ze water... zis water dat we are in, right? It is... it is... Okay. Zink if it like this: Imagina a glass of water. And you drop some uh, coloring into it. Some dye in it. Yes?

- Alright. Alright.

- So zen you are going to put objects into this water, yes? Zey will um, become covered in ze dye. Because it is in the water, yes? Now if zey are zings that abzorb things, if they are different colors when zey go in, ze differences between the objects will make ze dye in ze water affect zem differently. Yes? Zis is how ze Ether, in the Ethersea works.

- Riiiiight.... so he should just try talking to it-

- No! Zey worm is just zoaked in ze magic! And so

- Whys the worm here then?

- Why are- why are we here?!

- Whoa... whoa... that may be... might be even beyond my-

- No iz cause we fell into ze clam! That waz not a metaphysical question! We are here because we vell into ze clam. Listen. Listen. I know this is weird right? Giant worm! An uh, we're very small, and we're looking for the giant, ya know zing that makes things small and giant, right? But zis is not it! Zis building is not it, zose screw things are not it, ze worm is not it. Zey have all just been affected by ze same magic we are trying to find, but zat magic is not here. I have studied magic literally all my life. And zis is not it. Uh zis is like- Amber, I would not tell you how to uh punch a shark with your uh uh furious fists; Zoox, I would not tell you how to swim with the farts that come out of your feet. So I need you to trust me that I know that zis- the only thing that can happen here, is that zis worm sees us, as food like it sees zese, uh, things in ze wall, and eats us and poops us out as this white uh, tree gross stuff that comes out of its butt. Right? So...

- Ah yea that's fair.

- I love it when he's compelling.

• - Uhh it's a 6 and a 9 dude, heh heh heh

- Oh I get it.

- (fake laughter)

- Yea so if it-

- Dad um, theres uh... sex number, uhhhh I guess. Sorry its so (unintelligable) young thing for us young bucks

- I think it was invented in like 2005

- Yea thats pretty recent. We just came up with it. Hey dad if you try to follow up on this gag at all, I will hang up

- (loud, real laughter)

- This is not a "yes, and" situation

- No no no no

- It's not a "yes and" it's a "no thanks."

- I'll just open another window, lemme see

- Im about to close all the windows on my computer, and then...

- (gasp) oh my god

- (laughter)

• The problem with being lied to and manipulated iz that now, in retrospect I can not tell what waz a good day and what seemed like a good day because zis is how you wanted me to feel. Zis is the problem that I have. It iz not that I hate chu, it iz that I do not know what iz me, and what iz you. And what is ze church, and what it is that I want. Because for so long, you and the other teachers only saw me as a vessel to be filled with your ideas, and your beliefs. And you would do anything to have me accept those. I am afraid of every other feeling because I do not know if they are yours or if they are mine, but my resentment is my own. And zis is the anger I will keep coming back to, to understand who I am. And what fuels me is knowing that I am not you. As- I do not want to be only resentment, yes? But when I see your face and the symbol, and the church, it's all that I am. Pleasure doing business with you.

• - Amber who is zis fellow over here? He seems... I dont know, important? Weird?

- lemme think about it (out of character) do I know him?

- Roll uhh an investigation check.

- Kay. Sixteen.

- Plus anything?

- Nuh clean.

- Um they look familiar but you can't quite put your finger on it.

- (back in character) Well they look familiar but I cant quite put my finger on it. Ah well!

• You might be different, ah but uh different is not bad. It just means that you will have other strengths and other challenges along ze way. But I have seen you handle yourself very well in several different um, absolutely difficult and terrifying situations. And I think the only thing that is wrong with you is the same thing zat is wrong with everybody else, which is we are all just trying to understand ourselves, and understand who we are and uh what we are doing.

• - It's one of the jobs that was offered to you

- noooo which one? Was it one of the good ones?

- Make uhhh

- Perception?

- Yea perception or investigation, she just flashed it at you real quick.

- That's uhh wow a natural 1 I dont even know if that's paper. Hey! Whats with that banana you got!

• - Well is it coloquial or is it irrelevant?

- It's actually pronounced the cloaca, is where hes at

• - Do you have a jacket zat I could have? Zis is unrelate-

- They will cover your whole body

- No its unrelated, I just needed a new jacket

- Umm no! What are you talking about?

- I just thought that I would ask

- Have I ever come to your domicile and said like "hey! Selling any pants today?" That's a wild thing to do!

- Oh I did not say selling I was hoping you would just give it to me.

- Have I ever showed up at your domicile and said "gimme pants! Its me ya pal uncle Joshie gimme pants today!"

- We haven't known each other this long.

- No we haven't! Thats exactly right! We wicked have not!

• We don't want your boomerang dude

• (in deep voice) I agree, lets continue on our sacred mission

- Oh shit, Optimus Prime is here?!

- Autobots, transform!!

- Sam Witwicky

- Sam Witwicky!

- Sam Witwicky!!

• - Sam Witwicky did you bring the robot weed?

• - You know hes kinda squiggly and uhhhh wiggly... he is an octo- holy shit.

- What?

- Squiggles was ze smiley face!

- What?

- Squiggle- Squiggles- Squiggles! Skittles! Was ze smiley face!

- Travis is broken!

- Squiddly diddly?!

- Skittles? Squiggles.... was ze smiley face avatar at ze auction.

• Griffin trying out different voices for Nermal made me laugh. It doesnt really work to do in text because he does the same line multiple times in increasingly ridiculous voices.

• I could being your face down to a steak, cut it into nice strips for my brood

• - Im going to throw the uh, chance lance at the laser eye

- Okay. You didn't say it was an eye, but I like that. Thats cool.

- Well it is!

- Where else is it gonna go its not a laser belly button

- Well wait wait wait a minute! Im the one that came up with it, so I oughta say what it is.

- Yea what is it?

- It's a laser eye! Were you not listening?

• - Tell me about its smooth endoplasmic reticulum, Travis

- It's sexy as fuck!

• Point at the face that looks like your face. For pain I mean.

• Shrets not reaaaal. Its just a naaaame.

• - I got an 8

- I got a rock

• You can not call it a gift if it was not asked for or offered. You imposed this on us. This is not how a gift works. And second; your understanding that strengths come from- through suffering? This is not the way. This is not an acceptable... pathway for us to move forward.

• - Thats a 10!

- Yea... no

- How much defense could a chain have??

- It's not about defense-

- He makes a good point, Griffin

- It's not about defense! Its about you threading a chain-link with a crossbow bolt that you have tied a rope onto! There is no universe in which this-

- Well when you say it like that, Griffin, it sounds wild!

- Yea! It is wild! You see- Cambria laughs at you! The big worm monster laughs at you!

- Wait a minute wait! Wait a minute. Now when you make an attack roll youre rolling again somebodys armor class, correct?

(All talking over each other now)

- Did- you- dad-

- Now wait, wait a minute-

- Objection! The- the judges

- Can we talk about this?

- I don't wanna talk about anything else!

- All the jury members stand up and shout objection! At the same time.

- I don't have to win over a judge- a jury

- And the judge is like this isn't how court works, but I agree! Ob-

- I just have to win over you!

- Yea you're not gonna do that! Ive made my position perfectly clear. You can say you rolled a 10, what you did was you rolled a 2 plus 8. No way!

- Alright

- I wanna hear dad out!

- Yea!

- No no, let him speak

- Okay no no! Make your impashioned armor class argument.

- Now I'm just a simple fantasy lawyer, but my client

• stop rolling thunderclap damage!

• Herosim isn't some title that you earn for yourself and then you get to trot around. Its a thing that you do.

• If TAZ has a unifying theme, I've had a lot of thoughts about it, and if TAZ- The Tazmasphere- has a unifying theme, it is bullying people in administration positions.

• - If you have one of these, its called a map, and it will show you how to get to ze parlor, hmm?

- Uh okay. And she goes over to uh a- a desk, a small sort of information desk, and picks up a piece of paper and jots something on it and then hands it to you and its just a note that says "just fucking follow me!"

• - His name? Franz....ch.

- Franged?

- Frenched

- Sorry, Franche?

- Can you guys not make a big deal out of it everytime?? Im trying to- I don't have a billion names written time this time!

• - The more you lose, the more important it is to protect what you still have, you pessimistic asshole. Because there are children that are in Founders Wake that have never seen a fucking polar bear! And we have ze chance to save things so that- maybe you dont care right now. But maybe they will! Huh?? Maybe its not about you, you selfish piece of shit!

• You zink you are very special because you feel this way. You zink that you have a big picture kind of mentality and that you see things in a clear way that no one else. But I'm going to tell you a secret, Sir. I grew up surrounded by people like you. People who live their life and make their decisions because of some promise of a better zing coming right? And zat everyzing they do now is all worth it because of whats to come, right? But ze problem is when you are looking at ze big picture, ze the things that you often miss, right, iz ze little things. And so you become so focused on the big picture and working towards ze next thing, zat you lose focus on how you are affecting the world you are in now. You think the world will be better huh? The next one. Do you know how it got to be like that?? Because of assholes like you who focused on "better" and ze next thing. And growing and taking more and being more and having more and instead, maybe if you focused a little bit more on what was going on now, we wouldn't be in ze fucking predicament here under the ocean, surrounded by polluted water, zat we are. Did you ever think about this??

• But with her many arms she rips sun from sky and boils all the water- misbehavior

• That's why Gary Gygax used to say "this is my little nephew, Matt Mercer"

• It's a good point, but not relevant.

• I've always had the sneaking suspicion that when people aren't with us, theyre not really doing much of anything. Have you guys felt that ever?

• - Nah we, me and Dylan can handle it

- Whos dylan??

- Sorry??

- Uh, from- from deeper in the ship, the- the door to the bridge opens up, and you all see just this skeezy waistoid of a dude walk in and hes like "Hey what's up? What's going on?"

- Sorry who are you?

- Who is Dylan??

- This is my friend Dylan.

(Laughter)

• I- no! I don't think so at all! Im not with them. No I'm- I- Im- I like the mortal world! I like the- the I like the oceans, I like the- most of the people Ive met and I like all the creatures Ive met. I- I dont know why anybody would want to... get rid of this! I... I understand that people have lives and memories and- and all these things about the past, but, you know I recently learned that I'm not gonna live in it. I- I don't have that past to live in. So I don't wanna tunnel into... whatever Nirvanna or whatever these people wanna do. I just... I wanna enjoy this beautiful world that we have; this existence we have! I wanna appreciate it! I don't- I don't see any sense in trying to go somewhere else. Im! Not! With! Them!

• - My will

- What?

- My will

- Oh okay.

- Oh he did it in a scary voice. I hated that.

-Yea idk why..

- Like the devil-

- I can't hear it on my end, hows it sound?

- It sounds fucking scary man

- It sounds terrible

- It's the scariest-

- I'm trying to turn it off so please- please ignore me (demonic laugh)

- The volumes are too low and I tried to change this one slider and now I sound like this!

- It's wonderful to me that you got this fun new sound board in our penultimate episode.

- It's not- Ive had it for a little bit but I don't normally have these.

• - Your mind reels with a question as you blink away tears: where the shit am I? To which your own mind answers: I do not know

- Okay Griffin, but whats happening in the game??

• Yes! He's gained the power of literacy, and now he's unstoppable!

• - You have thwarted me again, Springfield

- Im walking away, I cant hear you actually Im walking away

- Wait

- Nope. Im not gonna! Im gonna walk away!

- Okay. I wish-a you wouldn't.

- Okay I'll see ya around. Bye!

- That's a weird thing to say after you said that cool shit about Siren

- I know but you keep talking to me and now its weird!

- You're not walking away!

- I want to though!

- You keep responding

- Okay now I'm definitely gonna walk away

- Doesn't sound like it

- Aw man.

-(Quieter) Okay I'm walking away

- Hey wait come back!

- Yea?

- What are you still doing here, man?

- God dammit!

• -You ask a fucking lot of questions. I get it, that its like-

- It's my whole deal!

- Yea but even so... it's... it's... tiring.

- What else would you have me dooo?

- You could just chill.

- I'm not The Statementer! Like I don't come when youre doing your job I don't-

- I've got a question for you.

- What is it?

- What did birds evolve from? (Out of character) and then I go

- Well the science-

- (dinosaur screeches) And a bunch of-

- No you didn't let me answer!

- Velociraptors jump through the windows!

• - Do you have a spectral pen, um?

- A regular pen that he can hold? When he's not-

- Yes it's fine I can man-manifest myself into a corporeal form. Please excuse me for just a second.

- Hang on just a second-

(Very loud obnoxious screaming from Justin)

• - Mr. Parsons? It seems a missive has come for you.

- Shhh. I hate this part.

• My name is Augustus Parsons; and I'm totally nuts.

• - That was a NICE ectoplasmic blast

- That's what she said!

#theadventurezone #TAZethersea #TAZdust #my posts

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heres-to-the-new-us · 3 years

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TTS Halloween special:

Varian:

-forgets the date and when its the day before halloween Raps is like "what are you gonna be" and he's like "holy- i FORGOT IT WAS HALLOWEEN I WAS BUSY WITH sCieNcE" *weird hand gesture thingy he does*

-but remembers that he predicted this happening and planned his halloween costume and trick-or-treat route 6 months earlier

-dresses up as Flynn Rider

-Eugene sees him and tears up

-Varian frantically tries to reassure him that no its not because he finds Flynn scary

-Eugene literally crying bc omg its ME i love me

-taking Angry and Catalina with him and generally having a good time but somehow 'losing' his candy every now and then ("candy? what candy? never heard of it in my life! have YOU heard of this thing known as 'candy', Catalina? no? i didn't think so. Sorry Varian, but whats a candy-")

Angry and Catalina:

-Catalina goes as a werewolf, Angry as a maniacal witch who has a werewolf familiar

-Catalina doesn't even need a costume, Angry just wears a pointy hat and normal clothing

-generally causing chaos everywhere and running away from Varian when they can

-have 32 different costumes Just In Case™️

-have only done it once before, but somehow still being so completely at ease with everything going around them (mostly bc its all chaos and they love chaos)

-Angry letting Catalina decide the route for trick or treating

-but she wants to go everywhere so they just go where Varian's going bc they know he planned how to get the most candy

-doing EVERY. SINGLE. ACTIVITY.

-luckily Varian planned for this as well (backup plan)

-and he knows his dad will get him candy and he'll share them with the girls

-so the three of them spend the rest of the night goofing around

-Angry and Catalina trying to lose him and generally being really chaotic and weird

-but Varian has trackers attached to their costumes

Eugene and Lance:

-dress up as each other

-dont even need to go trick or treating, just flat out steal candy

-being confronted by Rapunzel

-"it's a good way to practice being thieves without stealing anything actually of worth. besides, they're GIVING AWAY the candy, no one will miss it"

-ditch the candy halfway through bc even though they love candy, they love the haunted houses more

-randomly meets Angry and Catalina in some remote corner of the street, picks them up and takes them on a piggy back ride

-Varian not realising and then- "OH MY GOD I LOST THE GIRLS EUGENE LANCE I LOST THE GIRLS MY TRACKER ISNT WORKING IM SO SORRY-" "Varian. They're literally sitting on our shoulders." "oh"

-hosting some dangerous activities which Cass eventually comes to visit and criticise but can't because they invited her to play and she's actually have fun ("huh. you did one good thing in your life. i suppose, however dumb you are, you know how to have some fun")

-making a huge dramatic fuss because "oh my god. CASS. is having. FUN. ITS THE END OF THE WORLD AAAAAH" "shut up Fitzherbert"

The Brotherhood:

-Quirin not wanting to come but Varian convinces him

-"Whats a halloween?"

-Edmund being WAYY to enthusiastic about coming when he finds out what it is

-Hector sulking in his room bc bad memories from one halloween like 15 years ago

-"YOU STOLE THE COSTUME I WAS GOING TO WEAR, HOW DARE YOU CALL YOURSELF MY SISTER, THIS IS JUST LIKE WHEN WE WERE 12-" "IT WAS ONE TIME"

-Hector and Adira having a full on battle to find out who gets to wear the costume this year

-Adira winning and Hector sulking and just wearing his brotherhood armour bc "if i can't wear it im not dressing up in anything special at all."

-everyone loves Hectors 'costume' more than Adira and he ends up rubbing it in her face

-"why are you collecting so much candy" "for Varian, he loves candy" "oH DO YOU THINK I SHOULD GET MY SON SOME TOO" "yeah probably-" (Edmund & Quirin)

Rapunzel:

-"OMG ITS THIS THING AGAIN PASCAL WE NEED TO DO IT"

-dresses up as something stupidly optimistic like a flower (the sundrop)

-seriously who let this girl decide her own costume

-and why did it take her 18 tries to not look like a christmas tree

-does a whole theme of scary paintings the second October starts, probably one of those 30 day challenges, and displays them

-prepares a GIANT feast as a halloween celebration (none of the food was what she asked the cooks to make bc Eugene went into the kitchen and asked them to make something different)

-turns an entire floor of the castle into a haunted house (final surprise for Lance, Eugene and Cassandra to work together to escape, almost like a haunted escape room)

Cassandra:

-literally just dyes her hair blue and everyone is running away screaming

-"what? I dressed up as myself, and look how terrified people are. what can I say, Fitzherbert? I'm just better at this than you'll ever be." *smirks*

-Cassandra vs Eugene, who can get more candy edition

-Cass actually fighting people for bonus candy

-and winning ofc

-but she gives half of it to Rapunzel bc Raps was so busy setting everything up she didnt get much candy

-Eugene doing a puppy eyes at her and getting most of her candy, which means...

-"IN YOUR FACE CASSANDRA! I WON!"

-cue what Cass calls the 'Eugene (a.k.a dumbass) dance'

-sighs from everyone within 20 meters of him

-idk i also imagine her standing around eating like cotton candy and glaring at everyone who comes near her at some point

#here have a halloween gift #feel free to add on guys #halloween #rapunzels tangled adventure #tangled the series #tts #rta #rapunzel #cassandra #angry #catalina #varian #eugene #lance #the brotherhood #who i added for some reason #but hey they deserve to be here #original post

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calehenituseappreciation · 3 years

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Ive seen a lot of Dream (and usually Techno and Phil too) as gods au (i have one too dw) but all of you are sleeping on the funniest option.

Tommy is the god.

Tommy.

hes the only one in that galaxy (other than drista ofc)

Just imagine how fucking funny it is like

it would be so fucking hilarious

and tommy just doesnt tell them

so techno is just there making all these blood god jokes and jokingly telling tommy to serve him and tommys just laughing

imagine a god in the form of a chaotic 16 year old racoon gremlin just walts into your land commits arson and gets banned, only to come back with another person who he helps start a nation for drugs?

imagine how fucking funny it is

just

imagine tubbo banning a literal god from his lands and he just doesnt come back? he just plays by the rules? then goes and like sits in the corner all sad because some humans/dreamons told him to leave

ranboo, just joining the server: hi- a chaotic gremlin god: wanna commit arson with me? ranboo, just trying to vibe and maybe not disturb this god: sure

Phil and Ranboo recongnize Tommy as a god on sight.

Everyone else just refuses to believe it. hes Tommy. Tommyinnit. hes just weird lol

And Drista being a fucking chaotic blood god?

drista is open about her godhood and does not hesitate to spawn blocks

Drista finds Dream and decides she likes this small human, and dream just has to deal with it lmao.

drista and tommy are both born at the same time.

Tommy is a god of music, chaos, war and theivery (the last one bc he is a BITCH)

Drista is the blood god, chaos, deception, and theatre

okay but imagine the sbi interactions... like ig in this au tommy joins at like 12/13 years of age (in their minds) so he doesnt really grow much

and like tommy, a literal god, just claiming phil as his father???

phil, in his house making eggs, assuming one of his sons woke up and came to the kitchen, not looking: hey son tommy, from their couch, already deciding hes phils son now: whats up dad? phil: looks up at tommy who are you tommy: idk dad, who am i phil: *stares at tommy for a second* eh i made extra eggs you can stay

ASJIDGASUIOG IMAGINE TOMMY TELLING THEM HES A GOD BUT THEY THINK HES JOKING AND IGNORE HIM

everyone on the server: tommy is the youngest! tommy, as old as the universe: no im not!!!! im not a child!!!! he doesnt pout because pouting is for children and hes not a child but hes pouting tubbo: lol im older than you by a month tommy dont try to hide it tommy: im not a child!!!! techno: laughs

tommy doesn't try to hide that hes a god just its tommy

thats all the evedince anyone needs to think tommy isnt a god or powerful its like mcc hes good but only when he doesnt throw for content

quackity: sees drista written in bedrock lmao drista visited? tommy: yeah! i wrote that for her! quackity: snorts yeahhhh sureee tommy

imagine like how fucking funny it is jsut like

a fucking chaotic god breaks into your house androbs you makes a room under your house and decides to live in your floorboards

imagine dream like trying to manipulate tommy, and tommy a fucking anchient diety immeditly recongnizes what hes doing

but decides to play along for the angst and giggles and then actually gets mad when no one fucking cares for his theatrics

tommy, storming off to technos base to rob and build under: >:///// cant believe none of them acknoledged my deppression

i love that tommy stills robs everyone, he doesnt need to he can spawn in anything he wants

he just does it for the sport of robbery

JAKOGFSDOH

THE HOLY LAND

dream: im god actually tommy: thats so fucking funny lets make a cult about that :) dream: see! look! im god! and jesus! tommy: wheezing

imagine tommy getting stressed and letting go of his mortal form

Tommy, his human form peeling away, showing his actual form a bit: WH̸͘A͠T̷ ̶̢T͞H͢E ̡͘F̴̵͘Ù̧C͜K҉ ̶T͘͜͞E͟CHǸ͏Ǫ Techno: HAH?

tommy just saw tubbo and got emotionally attached

Tommy, a literal god: hello Tubbo: oh hi do you like my pet bee? Tommy: you’re mine now Tubbo: im okay with this

tommy, a bored god: gives techno shapeshifting powers techno, not even caring: changes into more human to pig-ishg forms as he wishes this is my life now ig

phil lets tommy do fuck all in exile bc he knows hes a god hes fine

phil: IDC IF YOURE A GOD! YOU WILL DO THE DISHES NOW YOUNG MAN! tommy: grumbles but does them

phil is the only one who can control tommy

god... tommy... with star freckles... on his human form... (as well as his god one)

tommy: f̷͛͠a̵̋t̵̒̑h̸̚e̶̓͝r̸͊ ̸̐̒i̴ ̸̅̿d̷̉͆o̵͂͋ ̵̛̆ñ̸̾ő̶́t̸̎́ w̶͆͘i̴͠s̵̓̈́h̸͗́ ̵̯͗f̶͋́ő̴͑r̷̐̌ ̶͝é̵̽g̸͊͂g̵̒s̷͂̃ phil: idc, eat your goddamn eggs tommy: pouts

tommy, despite being able to get supplies himself by fucking spawning them in: hey tubbo? we need supplies

In this au ig like if a god claims you you get a mark on your skin showing that. Drista’s would be like a green crown, Tommys would be a red and white disk (white as the outer ring and red as the center) (its different enough that if you don’t realise tommy is a god you wouldnt realise whos it is) (schlatt is the only one who never had one which shoulda been a sign dude :/)

Dream has two from the beginning, everyone else has only one, well until they meet drista. (sbi have had one since they met tommy, though they dont remember the first time they met tommy)

wait what if tommy like found them all as children one by one and later kinda pulled some strings to get them all in one kingdom. (he still joined sbi through forcing phil to adopt him)

OKAY BUT IMAGINE IF TOMMY MET TECHNO WHEN TECHNO WAS YOUNG ENOUGH TO NOT REMEMBER

tommy would hang out with baby techno and tell him stories

once he told him the story of a man named thesus

another time he told him the story of a blood god

like for example tommys first time meeting techno would be like

(for context techno lived in a shitty village and was an orphan and it was kinda a dog eat dog place, he learned how to be strong because of it)(he was young enough that he doesn’t remember this well, just like learning about the blood god and someone giving him gold)

baby techno: sighs tommy, appearing out of nowhere: oh heyyy whyre you sad? techno: jumps turning around with a knife up ready for a fight who are you tommy: im tommy! :) techno: what do you want from me! you dont scare me! tommy: whats your name! techno: i have a knife! i'll use it! tommy: of course, thats a given, but its rude not to tell people your name techno, confused: t-technoblade? tommy: smiles thats a nice name techno: so. tommy: hm? techno: why're you here tommy: i don't have a reason. im just a traveller! techno: then why hole to this terrible village! theres nothing nice here! everyone is terrible and so are you! tommy: hmmmm i dont agree techno: what are you? a child? i thought adults were supposed to know that everyone is mean tommy: mmhmm looks at the bruise on technos face where'd you get that? techno: fight. i won. i'll win against you too! so don't try anything. tommy: of course. i would never win in a fight against a blood god techno, putting down his knife a bit, stars in his eyes: blood god? tommy: grins blood. god. i think she'd like you. techno, muttering: maybe i can give the blood god some of your blood tommy: laughs yeah, she'd defenitly find you intresting tommy: here tosses techno a golden crown at techno, he spawned it in in the moment techno: whats this? tommy: a crown, thought it suit you screams in the distance tommy: huh. i need to go. have fun lil piglin. ruffles technos hair before running off towards the screaming unbeknownst to the pig the blood god was actually the one waiting for the god he met. techno: stares at the crown

Techno found a pouch of gold in his ‘house’ later that day. he didnt know who left it but it helped him get food for that night. (he kept the crown)

okay but imagine tommy not taking the war seriously at all, and only seeing it as a squabble between mortals, Like toddlers fighting

dream: SURENDER BY TOMMOROW OR WE'LL DECLARE WAR! wilbur: FUCK YOU WE'LL NEVER SURENDER AND JOIN YOUR SMP! Tommy: how cute

tommy doesnt realise that theyre serious until wilbur dies

tommy would usually go apeshit against anyone who dares messes with his humans, but what is he supposed to do when his humans are fighting Eachother?

wilbur: fucking goes insane and dies tommy: hey- hey can you guys let me talk to wil for a sec? everyone else leaves tommy, unsually somber: sorry i didnt help you i forgot how easily breakable mortals are tommy: this time you wont die, and i'll make it so that you dont break again, okay? tommy: brings wilburs soul out of its body and enters his mindscape ghostbur: wakes up what- where am i? tommy: hi there ghostbur: who are you tommy: i go by a lot of names all, one, you, the world, the universe, god, but you can just call me tommy ghostbur: oh okay. who am i? tommy: you're name was wilbur soot. you were the son of philza minecraft and brother to Technoblade, Tubbo and myself. ghostbur: was? tommy: well you see, you died. ghostbur: oh... well what am i then? tommy: a ghost! well actually its your choice. would you like to continue your existance or fade away with your body? ghostbur: i dont want to fade away! tommy: smiles thats what i thought you'd say stretches his hand to wilbur ghostbur: grabs tommy hand tommy: lets go home

ghostbur doesnt remember that though

he only remembers the good

tommy wont let him remember the bad, what if he breaks again? mortals are so fragile

phil realises what tommy did as soon as he sees ghostbur

drista, painting tommys nails (there both in god form btw) (after wilburs death btw): tommy shouldn't you of all gods realise how fragile they are? tommy: i know just... forgot drista: sighs and nods i get what you mean, especially with the ones we found... they act a lot like gods sometimes i forgot they arent tommy: ikr? wait- drista here gets drista's hair out of her face you were gonna get it on my nails, anyways, don't judge me. we all know if dream died you would turn him into a ghost too drista: smirks not if you do it first, we all know you would tommy: you say that as if you wouldn't fight me to do it first drista: .... tommy: ... drista: both of us when he dies? tommy: nods tommy: anyways my turn to do your nails

or like tommy with ghostbur like

ghostbur: i don't like this :( tommy, a worried brother and god: whats wrong? ghostbur: everyone is mad at me and i d-dont know why- why are they mad at me tommy: theyre mad at something alivebur did ghostbur: b-but im not alivebur sniffs it hurts. i dont like it. tommy: spawns in some blue here ghostbur: whats that? tommy: its some blue! it'll help you not hurt anymore! ghostbur: how does it work? tommy: see how its blue? ghostbur: nods tommy: well its blue because it sucks up all the bad feelings! it'll help ghostbur: !!!!! ghostbur: presses the blue into his chest ghostbur: !!!!its working!!!! :D tommy: smiles good

wilbur fucking died and tommy went from annoying little brother to caring older brother

tommy just wants to help his brother :) though he doesnt realise that not letting ghostbur remember bad memories isnt good

*at logsted shire btw* ghostbur: who are you? tommy, chuckling: did you forget me already ghostbur? ghostbur: i didnt forget you! i think! you're tommy! i just... you're different tommy, looks over at ghostbur: different how? ghostbur: you're not normal are you? tommy: grins whaaaaat? you think im weirdddd? how heartbreaking... my own brother thinks im weird, this is terrible ghostbur: giggles tommy: but really, don't worry about it bur. ghostbur: you sure? tommy: yeah, dont worry about me ghostbur: smiles okay! do you want some blue anyways? tommy: giggles sure! ghostbur: grins

ghostbur isnt worried about tommy

he knows hes strong

phil having to tell tommy that he cant just not let wilbur remember the bad memories

and tommys like "what if he breaks again!" and phil hugs him and tells him to at least ask ghostbur if he wants to remember and tommys like ‘fine’

tommy: hey bur? ghostbur: yeah? tommy: do you like you're memories? ghostbur: i mean, yeah its hard not to when you only remember the good tommy, quietly: would you want to remember the bad? ghostbur: w-what brought this question on tommy: answer the question ghostbur: no- alivebur was badi shouldn't want to- tommy: but what do you want bur? wilbur, silent for a moment: yeah- yeah i do. not that i like the bad memories! they hurt... but i wish i could remember tommy: ... ghostbur: hey tommy? tommy: yeah? ghostbur, with tears in his eyes: do you think they'd be less mad at me if i could remember, maybe then i could repair my relationships, what the hell am i supposed to do when i dont even remember hurting them? tommy: what if they dont? what if you break again? ghostbur, saltily: we'll maybe i'll be able at least be able to say i know why everyone hates me tommy: i know how to get all of your memories back ghostbur, looks towards tommy in shock: you do??? tommy: nods ghostbur, voice wavering: for how long tommy: since the beginning ghostbur: and you didnt tell me tommy: i did what i thought was best. i just didnt want you to hurt anymore. ghostbur, angrily: WELL THAT CLEARLY WORKED DIDNT IT? tommy: sorry wilbur, sometimes i forget how to handle humans ghostbur: what- tommy: sighs and taps ghostbur on the forehead and ghostbur does the ghost equivilent of passing out tommy: wont hide any memories this time

ghostbur doesnt wake up, instead wilbur wakes up weither thats good or bad we'll see

wilbur, waking up with all his memories: HOLY SHIT TOMMY WASN'T KIDDING phil, who was reading beside the bed tommy placed wilbur into, which was in technos house. yes he broke into technos house with a passed out wilbur. move on.: hm? wilbur: holy shit phil: huh? yeah. wilbur: wait you knew? phil: yeah i recongnized him as soon as i saw him about 5 years ago now? wilbur: excuse me while i freak out because my little brother is an actual god

it really hits wilbur that tommy is a god later

wilbur: hey tommy? tommy: yeah? wilbur: how fucking old are you? tommy: snorts of course thats the first thing you ask wilbur: well? tommy: i dont really know the exact years since years are kind of a human thing that were invented recently wilbur: they were invented thousands of years ago- tommy: but it was around the beginning of this galaxy wilbur, softly: what the fuck

tommy telling wilbur stories about different heros and villains and different humans he met during his life.

Adsjbffsg what if Tommy made himself blonde and blue eyed and white bc thats hyow the first human he met looked like asjfhsd

and just didnt change that, despite meeting new humans, its just his defult settings.

he would totally do this tho im crying.

drista just based her human form off dream because she is his sister now. he must deal with this. trying disowning me when i look like you BITCH.

thats my take anyways later might continue this

#tommyinnit #dsmp #dream smp #drista #god au #technoblade #wilbur soot #ghostbur #dreamwastaken #tubbo #philza minecraft #long post #just needed to say this

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girlnikolai · 2 years

Text

Judging you for your bsd kins except im a fucking cunt about it also im not including images because im in chemistry fuck yourself if that bugs you

if you point out the fact that these get longer as they go on then die pls <3

Dazai

Well arent you Unique. not like 90% of the fandom kins him or anything, cant say i dont kin him myself of course but i dont Kin Him i just kin him seriously tho if dazai is your top bsd kin stay 500 feet away from me and maybe take a bath while youre at it. your sense of humor is probably just uncensored depraved sexual posting and its fucking annoying shut up please. hardcore dazai kinnies suck so so bad but god damn you are all so annoying and i want to fuck you so bad (derogatory) i can make u worse babygirl please dm me. you need psychological help and not in a omg ur brocken way.... in a you should be lobotomized and pushed off a bridge way (affectionate)

Atsushi

do. do atsushi kinnies exist i thought that was just another word for furry. idk ill try my best um embracing my inner akutagawa kinnie pls kill yourself and kiss me on the lips. man seriously tho i didnt know atsushi kinnies were real are they just akutagawa kinnies in anger management. idk um. whore. bet u have an awful haircut. is that why you kin him fucko did you see the gay little tiger and his awful haircut and go hes just like me fr fr. is this your truth. your backstory. bitch.

Akutagawa

starting this off by saying if u kin him and ur ablebodied u should die. i dont think his disability is that relevent to his Angst but i love to be a hater. if u are disabled then cmere baby lets kiss im self loathing too hows ur relationship with ur dad. i bet ur bangs r why he left u. yeah i said it fuck you and your bangs. self callout i havent cut my bangs in 288485 years but its fine. i think we dont talk about the fact that akutagawa is canonically hot. as an akutagawa kinnie im allowed to say all akutagawa kinnies are hot unless ur one of the following. 1. ablebodied 2. have never lived in poverty 3. cis 4. idk fuckin. from michigan my akutagawa headcanon is that he hates michigan fuck yourself if ur from michigan

Ranpo

ranpo kinnies are such a mixed bag bc half of them are actually cool people who are probably autistic and the other half are the kids who thought they could genuinely solve the kira case. if u interpretat his lore as oh hes gifted kid burnout i think u need to sit down and tell me one time when hes burned out ever except the one part with mushitarou (is that how u spell his name idk hes ugly (affectionate)) yes honey i understand that youre too smart for this world and above everything but please go to bed you have school in the morning. if youve ever made an edit of ranpo to one of those like. little miss perfect type songs or averager or something please stay the fuck away from me. those songs fuck but god u are annoying

Yosano

ok real talk what is her backstory not even in a pretentious oh the writing is bad way i mean it in a i cant fucking read this is a cry for help someone please explain it to me. ok onto making fun of you. sterotyping is bad but also literally no yosano kinnie ive ever seen hasnt been nmlnm (non man loving non man) like this isnt even me being like haha ur a lesbian this is just a fact you like women dont you. seriously tho what is there to say about yosano i dont think i can comment on this shes property of the gays im sorry live laugh yosano ig

Chuuya

just spilled energy drink in my tits anyways if you were one of those kids slash still are one of those people whos like omg im so short and chaotic im a smol angry bean ill take ur knees out than im revoking your chuuya kin card 'oh but lucien you cant-' dont care didnt ask plus you only care about chuuya in the context of dazai. if you havent read stormbringer and u kin him shut up the adults are talking. i technically havent read stormbringer but my babygirl @chaotictransmess mansplained it to me so im infinitely hotter than all of you. please god please dm me if u kin chuuya and arent fucking annoying my legs are spread please baby

Fyodor

oh so ur a dazai kinnie (individuality complex edition) and youve read edgar allen poe wow.....ur one of those people who shits on others for saying crime and punishment is too long. NO ONE CARES THAT YOU READ THE WHOLE THING ITS LONG AND BORING AND YOURE A VIRGIN KAY WHY ESS SWEATY. this isnt directed at my beloved rowan ofc you can do no wrong /p fyodor kinnies are an unholy intersection between the worst dazai kinnies and the worst ranpo kinnies please shut up no one cares how fucked up you think the world is you live in suburbia shut up shut up shut up shut up. you absolutely used to lie on the internet to say you were french or russian or something in like 7th grade.

Nikolai

do you actually kin him or are you an XD crackhead. you probably go oh yeah my music taste is pretty wild and then its willwood and the cats the musical soundtrack. if youre an actual nikolai kinnie and not just an edgy 14 year old please stay away from me. not in a oh em gee ur so twisted way no u probably just smell bad and dress ugly and i dont want to be seen with u. you probably jokingly hit on your friends and jokingly make fun of them and no one finds it funny. dont worry babygirl i'll appreciate you like they never could please give me a chance. nikolai kinnies are hot as fuck until they arent. not saying anything else nice bc any validation you fucks get goes straight to your cock.

Kouyou

...mommy? 🥺

Poe

do you kin poe or do you wanna fuck ranpo so bad but you have too much internalized cringe to read x reader fics. ive said this 7 times but jesus fuck bsd fans shower challenge. you were one of those kids who got mad into those like. talking animals series but not like warriors and animorphs kids no im talking guardians of ga hoole. you wanna write so bad but anytime you fuck up you cry and bash your head against the wall and listen to mitski again i am sneaking dog anxiety meds into a hot dog for you. i cant even be mean on this one yall r like dying puppies who live in allies jesus yall bum me the fuck out

Kyouka

i havent seen anyone else kin kyouka so im doing this for myself ig. suprisingly enough despite being a massive cunt i kin the uwu smol bean of the fandom. kyouka isnt a smol bean ofc bsd fans just cant read i think. guys shes murdered people all she did was cry about it a few time guys pls shes not ur poor meow meow shes a traumatized child

Kunikida

the token Bsd Fan That Showers. guys pls kunikida kinnies this is a cry for help no one here has even read the light novels Heple. seriously tho i cant think of anything mean to say about kunikida kinnies. not like any of you would admit to kinning him publicly bc u think kinning is below you. ik being like omg ur 'insert sex thing' is cringe however no kunikida kinnies fuck its part of the job description please get laid

final thoughts

ok so basically like. 1. tell me if u want me to make fun of any other kinnies 2. yada yada yada this is all in good fun i didnt mean any of this pls dont spam report me badly dressed 15 year olds of tumblr 🥺🥺🥺 3. before one of you failed abortions decides to come in my notes like 'oh man does making fun of people make u feel better about yourself. we're just having fun ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️' the answer is yes it does make me feel better about myself i am a hater first and a person second and also i dont care if ur just having fun guess what fuckwad im having fun too now shut up <3

ok but in all seriousness i dont give a fuck who you kin and why and you shouldnt care about my opinions i want to fuck monty gator from fnaf and i kin the little gay elf wizard from the adventure zone and one time i ate gum off the floor cringe culture is dead girl if wearing an ugly trenchcoat and a amazon body harness over a death note t shirt makes u happy go do it. but in a genuine note a word to the bsd fandom PLEASE LEARN READING COMPREHENSION JESUS FUCK FOR A FANDOM REVOLVING AROUND A SERIES ABOUT DEAD AUTHORS YOU GUYS LITERALLY CANT READ ANYTHING EVER SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP anyways xoxo girlie pls like and subscribe like i said give me requests for other bsd characters making fun of people is my passion

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prelovednikaidou · 3 years

Note

I JUST HAD THE CRAZIEST IDEA LIKE🤯🤯🤯

Okay lets imagine MC is alive after all them fiasco right? The baby is safe right? so heres the thought. What if MC got divorced with Toji and still keeping the baby. Lets leave it at that. Oh yeah Toji doesnt get killed in this thought, that mf doesnt deserve anything and even death. So why stop the suffering there right?.

Fast foward to many years later, The MC died, Megumi and Toji doesnt know, the rejected child get a hold of MC like idk a diary, MC wrote everything like from her happy self on the wedding day, to how the fushiguro treated her, RC(rejected child) felt how broken she was, how sad she was, and how she still suffer about it all, the way it traumatized her and all. Now RC know why their mother sometime called out a name (megumi or toji), how she would call the RC tge wrong name, how often she would stare into nothing( shes still there like care for the RC and everything but like its not the same shes traumatized here people). That is where the feeling of hatred grow. Heehee.....

Now fast foward again(lets aged up the jujutsu first year too second year kay?), RC are cursed okay, so they attended the jujutsu school in tokyo, they met megumi, theyre like "wow this you?, no wonder she left..i couldnt even look at you" ya know this type of attitude but just like purd hatred but still RC like care for megumi but it just doesnt show and denied it just like how mwgumi to MC.

Megumi doesnt know if RC is his half sibling, but i imagined the scenario where megumi know because he notice when RC like gasligthing him in a spar or something and megumi have a moment of realization like "your my brother", i imagine that the RC hit him so hard till he fell to the ground, imagine it was raining as RC stand above him like i dont holding a weapon or like stick or something, megumi thought RC is going to end him but instead RCs weapon stabbed the groud beside megumis ear which makes it bleeding and RC like looking a down a stunned megumi and said "im not your brothe. Not now and not ever".

Then megumi like try to talk to RC about their mom right and one day RC just said " SHES DEAD ALRIGHT? SHES GONE. now get lost and dont fucking bother me" megumi maybe broke down in the middle of the hallway and cry or like he sits in his room looking through the sticky notes that MC gave him when hes a child and cry his eyes out. RC came back and sees megumi, sits besides him and tell the story, how MC loves him and his dad, how sometime she mistake RC as megumi and all that stuff.

"Thats why i hate you.i despise you. I wanted to kill you that day, i wanted to kill you for everything you put her through, but i didnt because i know for sure mom could have comeback alive just to kill me. She left this for you-" RC gives megumi a letter and like "she may forgive you for everything that youve done. But i dont. So dont even try to get close to me, fushiguro. Or i will literally kill you"

"She wouldnt let-"

"Shes not here now is she? Brother."

Now move along to toji, i think RC would like find him ya know?, hunt him down or something like that and toji knows who RC is and hes like "where is she?" "come with me"

RC took toji to MC grave "i have nothing to say to you, fushiguro. But i hope you suffer for the rest of your life hating yourself and blaming yourself." RC threw MC diary to the ground beside tojis feet.

"She was happy you know." And then he just left

KmskkabaknakajKJBSJSHAKBAKWN😭🙏😭🤧🤢🤯😵😱😡🤬☠

IM SO SORRY ANON. It isnt within my attention to not reply as fast as I could but I took my time to read this one and PLEASE GIVE ME PERMISSION TO LINK THIS UP AFTER THE LAST PART BRRRR THIS IS SERIOUSLY LIKE A WHOLE PLOT 😩😩☝🏻☝🏻 YALL READ THIS

#nik; [asks] 📤#nik; [his new wife] 🌦

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moonlit-imagines · 4 years

Text

Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s stepkid

Tony Stark x Potts!child!reader

warnings: alcohol mention

a/n: i rushed these so bad i just wanted to post dhhshsnsna

prompt: y/n is pepper’s kiddo!

it was just you and your mom for a long time

pepper and y/n potts

she couldn’t keep up with you sometimes, too busy dealing with the manchild that was mister anthony edward stark

speaking of—

“uh, who’s this?” -tony, pointing at you

“mr. stark, i am so sorry, the school closed because some kid set fire to the science lab and i didn’t have time to find a sitter—”

“no, it’s fine, no need to apologize. hey, kid, you wanna sit in the boss’s chair? i’ll let you run the company for the day!” *cue you nodding* “sweet, would you mind that, ms. potts?”

“oh? no, not at all” *mouthing* “thank you”

“so, uh, what’s your name? no, don’t tell me: ketchup.”

*giggling* “y/n”

“no way! that was my second guess!”

tony wasn’t used to being around kids

he had no idea that he was actually kind of good around them

despite a few minor hiccups

“you sit in my chair and im gonna spin you around, sound like fun?”

he spun you around WAY too fast and you were diiiiizzy, also you fell off the chair

“don’t tell your mom that we did that. she may be my assistant, but she scares the shit out of me. also, don’t say ‘shit’”

dude he just thought you were a cool kid!!!

“hey, you know, ms. potts, you dont really need to hire a babysitter anymore. y/n’s doing just fine hanging out here”

“how am i not surprised you befriended an actual child?”

she still took him up on his offer, you seemed pretty happy

when your mom worked late, you passed out in tonys office

tony and you had your own little secrets (like falling off the spinning chair), tony showed you around stark tower, and you practically lived there

“i got you a happy meal from mcdonalds!” -tony every day after your school

in all honesty, you weren’t the “popular” kid at school...not even close

but tony made up for it

“y/n! i found this old racecar toy in a box of old stuff, you wanna hold onto it for me?”

you kind of grew up in stark tower tbh? it was pretty cool

and as you grew up, you started to notice more

“mr. tony, do you have a crush on my mom?”

“do i what? no, no, i do—who the hell am i kidding? you caught me”

“called it!”

after that you did everything to try and get them together

when your mom was talking to tony, you would stand behind her and wiggle your eyebrows and just taunt tony endlessly

no! tony cannot remember your mom’s birthday for the life of him! you are his calendar now

“dude, why dont you just ask JARVIS to remind you?”

“i may be a genius, but that doesn’t mean i have common sense”

“wise words, sir” -JARVIS

when tony disappeared for 3 months you were so sad???? like you were not okay at all

and when he came back, he literally exited the plane saying “WHERE’S ‘T-POTT??’”

(your wonderful nickname. ‘t’ for ‘tony jr.’ and ‘pott’ for ‘potts’)

“my mom missed you”

“oh, i bet she did”

“you turned my child into you, tony. i will never forgive you for this”

“well, at least y/n was here to fill in for me, huh?”

tony wanted to show you the arc reactor but he was actually afraid of scarring you lmfaoooo

but he did let you in on the iron man secret (he knew you wouldn’t snitch)

and just to make sure:

“if you dont tell anyone, i’ll buy you a car when you turn 16”

“man, that’s like, forever away”

“good, maybe you’ll forget by then”

ur mom kinda maybe sorta found out abt iron man :/ she told you that tony was a bad influence

“mom! no, tony’s cool! he’s like a superhero”

“no, sweetie, he’s a rich guy with issues. we’re leaving”

that didn’t last long

not long at all

and soon they FINALLY got together

“jeez, i thought you two would never stop pining after each other”

“couldnt have done it without my wingman” -tony *fistbump*

“as thanks can i have my own iron man suit?”

“yes.” *pepper glaring at him* “no.”

sooner or later your mom and you moved into tony’s house and you got a really big room!!!!

it was completely decked out

king sized bed, flatscreen tv, mini-fridge, microwave, computer, your own bathroom with a smaller tv, a poster of tony??? (you vandalized it and put it in his workshop), and more!!!

okay you were spoiled

“do you like it here? are you sure i made the right choice?” -pepper

“are you kidding, mom? this is awesome! plus, you’re happy, i’m happy, tony’s happy, i think JARVIS is even happy!”

“i am, mx. potts. simply ecstatic” -JARVIS

pepper was really happy!! it was a pretty cool family

you started giving your school tony’s number if you ever got in trouble, you knew he’d cover for you

“mr. potts, is it?”

“sure”

“your child, y/n, punched another student in the face today. we’re very disappointed in their behavior”

“why’d they punch the kid?”

“well, the other student punched y/n first”

“HAH! thank you for wasting my time. send y/n back to class and call me back if something important comes up”

he literally gave you a high five when you got home

“i gave him a black eye!”

“i couldn’t be more proud. i mean, i dont condone violence, but self defense is a whole other story”

a little help in the workshop, tony asks you to hold the flashlight

“why don’t you get one of your robots to hold this for you?”

“are you kidding me, you’re complaining? we’re having stepdad/stepkid bonding time! and dum-e can’t do anything right, i dont trust him”

youve had a few theme park trips as a family ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

also tony has 100% told you to wait in the car and then left you alone for 2+ hours

“i’m not like a regular dad, im a step-dad. want some beer? you can have a little sip. i’d rather you do it in the house”

your mother actually does love how he actually cares about you!

“y/n is 12% my responsibility” -tony

“tony, you are impossible” -pepper

no avengering for you! pepper said no!!!!!!

disappointed but not surprised

iron man 3: y/n potts is put through the wringer

Text Message to Mr. Tony: bro you better come get your girl, me and happy are watching this other guy flirting with her. he’s showing her pics of his ‘big brain’

Mr. Tony: HE WHAT

Text Message to Mr. Tony: Tony he looks creepy i don’t want him to be my new stepdad do something!!!

anyways ur house kinda blew up and ur mom and you kinda got kidnapped and u were right abt that guy being creepy and thankfully no experiments were done on you but like your mom kinda almost died and her and tony were fine!!! all good in the end

you met mr. col. james rhodes that day

“aw, you’re the kid ive heard so much about” -rhodey

“you mean the coolest kid in the world?check.”

“you cant tell me you aren’t tony’s biological child, good god”

you got to meet the avengers later on too! (you’d already met natasha tho, only briefly)

“i know it can be a little overwhelming, right? meeting all these heros, legends even—” -rhodey

“oh, my god, is that thor? thor!!” -you, leaving rhodey in the dust

literally why does pepper trust you around tony something always goes wrong there were literally robots attacking, you were only at avengers tower bc your mom was busy with the company and she thought you’d be safe with the avengers. the AVENGERS.

“please dont tell your mom that i created a bad robot that tried to kill us. the robot will be the least of our problems” -tony

he made happy pick you up and you had to miss out on FUN and it sucked a lot

“it’s okay, y/n! i’m fun, too!” -happy

then your mom and tony took a break and your life got mega-boring for a while, but they weren’t separated for that long. you try not to think about it. it was brutal

Mr. Tony: Does she miss me?

New Message to Mr. Tony: I think so. Either that or she’s crying and drinking wine in the dark for no reason.

Mr. Tony: Damn it, now I feel bad. I miss her a lot. Oh, also, the Avengers say ‘hi,’ I’m in Germany with some bad news, I’ll explain later if you don’t see it on TV first, and I found you the perfect friend! His name is Peter and I think you’d like the school he goes to, it’s in Midtown. Smart kid school.

New Message to Mr. Tony: I’ll look into it, thanks. Also, I don’t like how those all connect. Please update me asap

watching the news to see several avengers arrested, cap on the run, and more!

“maybe it was good i didn’t fall in with the avengers”

tony and pepper finally got back together and you actually transferred to midtown high! peter and his friend group accepted you quickly, it was great. you and flash unfortunately had the most in common

you’d literally text happy right next to peter and he’d immediately reply to you. it hurt peter’s feelings

Momma: Sweetie! I’m working in the office late, leftovers are in the fridge, hope you have a wonderful day at school! 💕

👉👈the vulture tried to kill you for being tony’s stepkid, tony made peter promise to protect you

“y/n, you gotta stay out of harm’s way. mr. stark gave me an actual mission and it’s terrifying, i have to make sure you stay safe”

legit why the fuck was this old man tryna kill you bro grow up

anyyyywayssss your mom and tony got engaged!!

“wow, i thought the day would never come!!” -you

ppl told you tony isnt your stepdad bc ur mom and him werent married but who tf asked

why is the earth always in fucking danger

you and peter were just vibing on the field trip bus and all the sudden: space donut

“go! i’ll cover for you...FRIDAY, call tony”

“...hi there, little one”

“what the fuck”

“oh, so you see the aliens, too? well, at least im not crazy”

tony stark has left the atmosphere

you and your mom were kinda......not chillin tho

she and you didn’t sleep for a few nights, then ppl just straight up disappeared

plot twist: you survived the snap and your family was lucky to be alive, you even got a little sister who became a big handful!

only bad thing was all your friends dusted and you were pretty lonely

but watching morgan grow up kept you busy

“ahhh, shes so big!”

happy times in bad times

bad times!!!!! bc after five years thanos came back as thanos from like ten years ago. outdated thanos. obsolete thanos.

but you made your first and only appearance in the suit tony actually designed for you many years ago

you should have just stayed home tho bc that fight didnt pass the vibe check

“please dont tell me he...no, no, no, no, no”

you and your mom latched onto each other in tears, tony was one of the best people in your life, he made you and your mom two of the happiest people on earth

best stepdad a kid could ever ask for

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @lokihiddles // @frostedgiantfavs // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisbisexual // @teenwaywardasgardian // @pappydaddy // @captainshazamerica // @freya-xo // @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm // @ofthedewthesunlight //

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nikrangdan · 4 years

Text

cafeworker!ni-ki

pairing: cafeworker!ni-ki x female reader

genre: fluff, comedy

description: the cashier at the new coffee shop was so adorable you just couldn’t resist visiting just for him

**did not proofread

————

contrary to popular belief, you were NOT a social person

whenever you were around friends and family, you were always the loudest person there

like SHUT UP Y/N!!!!!!

anyways although you were loud, people still enjoyed being around you because you had such a sweet soul and interesting humor

everyone close to you knew that you hated talking to people you didnt know

but to all the strangers? no

they would think you were an outgoing ready-to-meet-new-people extrovert

which was so, so wrong

but ALAS, you had to talk strangers almost everyday living in 2020

(well lets pretend we arent in the middle of a pandemic right now)

moving on......

so you were in high school at the downfall of your existence

you used to have so many friends when you were younger ..now you only have like 3

and those three were always busy (busy making up excuses thats for sure) so you never really hung out with them outside of school

and on one fine evening after school you decided to visit the new cafe 5 minutes from your house

u were really excited because all the cafes were 15 minutes from your house so now u could just walk to this one if u wanted to !!!

but yeah it was in the middle of a small plaza that had cute buildings

you pulled up to the parking lot and was just about to get out the car when u remembered..

u have to talk to the cashier :/

who’s a stranger! even more ://

it was always so weird to you.. whenever you went out you always had someone else order for you because you just hated talking to strangers

you just felt uncomfortable and you couldnt help it

its not like you have never ordered for yourself but you would always prefer not to

and now that you think about it

this is the first time you have gone out by yourself

you did text one of your friends beforehand but they said they “had homework to do”

LIES!!!!

but you really wanted to try the coffee so you just ran with it

time to face your fears!

you opened the glass door to reveal a cute looking cafe, like the ones you’d see in movies

you loved it already

glancing to the cashier you’d have to be talking to—

hold on

you had to do a double take because WOAH.....

the cashier...

he....

wow..

you have never seen a boy like that in your life

you stood there for like 3 seconds before coming to your senses and standing infront of the menu

that was infrONT OF HIM

“hi, what can i get for you?”

HIS VOICE OH MY GOD..!?!?!

“oh um.. can i get a second to .. look..?”

“yeah of course,” he gestured to the menu on the wall above him

hes so nice u almost cried

your eyes shakily traveled up to the chalkboard menu and u began to ‘read’ the options

its like u could feel his eyes on u WTF!!!!

um um um *internally keyboard smashes*

you couldnt even think

the words on the menu were like gibberish

the ONE time u go out by yourself

this had to happen.. of course! someone had it out for you, you were sure of it >:(

picking a random drink you gave him your order

“uh can i have an iced caramel macchiato?”

ITS LIKE YOU CANT SAY A SENTENCE WITHOUT UH OR UM

u cant help but think hes judging you

he looks like that while u are standing there in old sweatpants your dads tshirt

“sure, what size?” he looks into your eyes after putting your order into the machine

god you felt your heart stop

his Eyes..... theyre so beautiful

“oh um regular” you attempted to give a small smile

hopefully it looked like one

“okay that’ll be $5.12.”

you dug out some cash from your bag and handed it to him

he gave u your change and gave u a small smile

“your drink will be out in a minute”

AAAAA

he went :)

he is so CUTE.....?!?!

he looked around your age too

sigh... you knew he was way out of your league though

you were gushing over him but he probably thought you were just another boring customer

while waiting u sat at one of the 2 person tables on your phone

and u IMMEDIATELY went to text your groupchat

‘GUYS’

‘AT THE CAFE NEAR MY HOUSE’

‘CUTEST BOY IVE EVER SEEN EVER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE’

‘WTF IM GONNA CRY HOW DOES HE EXIST’

‘WAIT BRB HE S COMIBBG’

you tried to quickly put your phone down without looking suspicious when you saw him walking towards you with a drink in his hand

“here you go, enjoy” he said before swiftly making his way back to the counter and talking to the other worker there

wow... hes so mesmerizing

you’d steal glances at him every now and then while taking sips of your drink

you were sitting there for like 20 minutes before you noticed you finished your drink

you totally forgot you came here to see how good their coffee was

it was good by the way

sadly it was your time to leave

taking one last glance at him, you threw away your empty cup and walked out the door

wow

u cant believe you got to witness the most beautiful human being ever

in your small town?? crazy

you were sitting in your car just thinking

WAIT

U DIDNT EVEN KNOW HIS NAME!

you mentally punched yourself but then you started laughing

what does knowing his name even matter, its not like u were ever going to talk to him anyway

LOL

*sad emoji*

but the coffee was good so you definitely planned to go back

and not just because of the cute boy

...unless....

*time skip*

the next day you went there was a week later at the same time in hopes that he was working the same shift

AND HE WAS!!!!

score! 1 for y/n, 0 for umm... any other person who had a crush on him too i guess

the cafe didnt have too many people since it was fairly new and also in a small part of the city

so when you went in, you were the only one there along with the two workers

“welcome, what would you like to order?”

NOT THIS AGAIN

he looked even cuter today

his messy blond hair almost covered his eyes

you shouldve forced your friend to come with you this time

you ordered the same thing as last time but this time he asked for your name

hmmm

“um y/n” you answered

your heart was always beating 2 times as fast whenever you had to talk to him

he wrote it down on the cup and after you paid, you went to sit down at the same spot as last time

looking at him is literally the highlight of your day

the same thing happened as last time, he came over and gave you your drink without giving u a second glance

>:((((

boooo look at me cute boy

nonetheless u continued going to the cafe at the same time as much as u could which was like three times a week

literally over a month later and u dont think anythings going to happen

u punch yourself for thinking the boy would somehow find interest in you

hes still indifferent to you which isn’t surprising since you’ve never made any kind of move

ever

but

he should know u by now

hopefully..

*time skip again*

it was a saturday

at this point you’ve basically given up on having a crush on him and now since its become a routine u just say you go for the coffee

not really paying attention to your surroundings you dont notice that the boy at the cash register isnt the normal one you see almost everyday

“hey, what would you like to order?”

woah WHAT

you look up from your bag to notice a boy that was definitely not the one that normally stood infront of it at this time

and you also noticed something on this new cashier

a name tag

how come your old little crush didnt have one????

this new boys name was ‘jay’ and he was fairly cute too

looking around the corner at the other worker u noticed he has a name tag too

you recognized him because he was always working when the cute boy was at the cash register

his name was ‘heeseung’

after taking in these new additions you answered to jay

“oh um.. can i ge-,”

“she gets an iced caramel macchiato. her name is y/n”

??!<_|#%[>~€\£~

you whipped your head around so fast to see who said that behind you

was it who you thought it was ??!??!

YES IT WAS!!!!

OH MYGOD

ITS HIM

you widened your eyes at the boy who wasnt wearing his normal black and white uniform

instead he was wearing black ripped jeans and a gray hoodie

wow....... and u thought he couldnt look any better

BUT OMG?? HE REMEMBERS U

“oh wow ni-ki, you know her?” the boy named jay asked him

“uh yeah.. shes a regular” he said before walking to stand next to you

NI-KI

HIS NAME IS NI-KI OHMHGOD

u thought his name fit him perfectly its so CUTE

“are you gonna get something too?”

this whole time you were silent because.. what is going on

your heart was being SO fast you thought that everyone could hear it

“yup, can i get the same thing? also im paying for both of us”

WHAT??/):)/$;##\%|

ur eyes widened even more it looked like they were gonna pop out of its sockets

u unconsciously leaned towards the boy next you and kind of put your hands up

“w-what?? oh um no, you dont have to do that” you nervously said to him as he looked down at you

he kind of had a smile on his face

“i want to.”

there is no way this is happening

“oiiii ni-ki” jay chuckled while punching in numbers on the cash register

“ill have both of your drinks out soon, you two kids have fun!” jay said before turning around to face heeseung

WHAT??!!??!

your jaw almost dropped from shock

millions of thoughts ran through your brain and you couldnt even process anything

u cant believe this was happening

it was like a wattpad story or something.. is this how u meet ur soulmate

your thoughts were interrupted by a hand on your back momentarily and u look to see ni-ki shyly grinning and gesturing u towards a table

no way...

you awkwardly follow him to a 2 person table next to wall and sit down

you literally could not hear anything except for the pounding of your heart

“uh sorry about that...” he rubbed his neck and sheepishly smiled

“im ni-ki by the way”

“y/n...” u felt so awkward u wanted to cry

“agh, im really sorry if that was weird.. i just didnt know how to ask you out.....” he trailed off

*passes out*

IM JOKING

Ok but u felt ur heart stop bc NO WAY

“wait what??” u ask, ur eyes bigger than the moon

“um yeah... haha i took the day off today to try to talk to you.. sorry if that was weird..”

HE WAS SO AWKWARD JUST LIKE YOU IT WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER

“no its okay!! im glad actually...”

“really? so is it okay if we hang out?” he asked excitedly

u did not think u could handle HOW CUTE THIS BOY WAS O M G...

“of course! sorry if im kind of awkward though” you gave a small smile

“its okay, i think i am too”

you two began talking about the cafe and where you went to school

turns out even though you two lived in the same town (literally 5 minutes away from eachother) u went to different schools for some reason

u talked for like 2 minutes before jay walked up with your drinks

“hows it going guys?”

“its doing good bro, now go away..” ni-ki lightly shoved jay and laughed

you giggled at the sight

jay looked offended and came right back

“that is not how you talk to your elders ni-ki! y/n do you see this?!” he scoffed

ni-ki just rolled his eyes and turned back to you

“do not ignore me young man!” jay joked

“oh y/n, ive heard all about you from ni-ki over here by the way.”

ni-ki’s eyes got so big you almost got worried

he turned around so fast and gave jay one of those ‘i swear if you say anything ur dead meat’ looks

jay obviously did not care

“hes always like ‘y/n this y/n that’ blah blah im glad he finally got the balls to ask you out because im honestly sick of hearing it!” jay laughed

u were blushing so hard

NI-KI LIKED U????

this felt like a dream

ni-ki pushed jay away so hard and turned back with red cheeks

awe

but yeah that was the beginning of the cutest relationship ever

u and ni-ki were so cute together <333

you’d always visit him during ur free time

it took like 2 months before u two made it official tho

and he was the sweetest boyfriend ever

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juststrugglingwithstress · 4 years

Text

Siblings in Writing

(edit: this was not supposed to be as mean/angry as it sounded! this is really just one type of sibling relationship, albeit a type of relationship i often see underrepresented in writing. my experiences are not everybody’s experiences, and i’m sorry for the parts of this post that make it sound that way. use whatever kind of sibling relationship you’d like--just make sure your siblings have fought (small or big disagreements) at least once!)

ANGRY INTRO

yall. PLEASE. NOT ALL SIBLINGS CALL EACH OTHER “sissy”, “sis”, OR “bro”.

I DON’T CARE HOW CLOSE THEY ARE. ANY AND EVER SIBLING PAIR HAS FOUGHT. and TWINS?? a lot of twins aren’t as close as you think they are. i know like 3 pairs of twins and usually they are TEARING EACH OTHER’S THROATS OUT.

me and my brother???? we have our nice moments where hes like “hey adele look at this thing i drew, do you like it? i don’t think i did a good job but--”

“i think it’s really cool”

but most of the time???????? he calls me bitch and i insult him TO THE MAX.

PLEASE EVEN IF THE SIBLING PAIR YOU ARE WRITING ABOUT IS CLOSE, THERE IS NO POSSIBLE WAY THEY ARE AS CLOSE AS YOU THINK THEY ARE.

younger siblings do things they would never, ever do with anybody else solely for the purpose of annoying their older sibling. older siblings, at times, will go into homicidal rage.

ALTERNATE GREETINGS:

“what’s up?” “go away” “no”

*silence*

“hey” “hi” *separate ways*

“hey full name other doesn’t usually use” “I literally hate you so much”

older: “NAMEEEEEEE! mom/dad/other wants you!” younger: “fuck off” older: “i’m going to break your nose” younger: “with mom/dad/other standing right there? yeah sure”

younger: “why are you here” older: “cause it’s my room, fuck nugget, get out”

older: “WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU IN MY ROOM” younger: “oof someone had a bad day” older: “IM GOING TO KILL YOU”

“i hate your face” “cool, i have food” “give me some”

“NAMMMMMMEEEEEEE! dinner’s ready!” “yeah yeah okay give me a second i’ll be right down”

“why did you have to come here?” “this is,,,, our house,,,,, that i too live in” “yeah but i was hoping you’d get run over by a bus” “why thank you, i was too”

MORE ABOUT TWINS

i dont care if you want your siblings to be close or whatever, do you know how INFURIATING it is to have a twin????? especially an IDENTICAL ONE???

if you have identical twins, they are going to hate each other’s guts for 3/4s (or more) of the time. having somebody who looks just like you, living in the same house as you, probably going to the same school as you, who has the same birthday as you, and most likely sleeps in/super close to the room you sleep in? actual hell. especially if they have a lot of the same interests/friends as you do. this experience is horror in it’s rawest form. nobody wants this. they want the “close, happy twins who do EVERYTHING together and have since they were born!!!”

IMAGINE A SIBLING RELATIONSHIP, BUT THEY LOOK J U S T L I K E Y O U AND ARE A L W A Y S W I T H Y O U.

remember what i said about hell?

(possibility: if the one identical twin is better at something or more liked than the other, it fuckin sucks. imagine this experience in the school halls: “eva???? what are you wearing???? oh my god, did your mom mix up your clothes with jasmine’s again? i feel sooo bad for you!!”

“actually this is... jasmine. eva has spanish right now.”

“oh. whatever.”

sucks, right?)

forcing that kind of relationship on your fictional twins is both unrealistic and tbh kind of scary.

now, twins who don’t look the same. everything i just said, but minus the appearance. yeah. i can see the shitshow now!

THE YOUNGER SIBLING DILEMMA

coming from an older sibling, younger siblings are satan.

they will:

annoy the older sibling at all costs

never do anything the older sibling says

“why does SHE/HE/THEY get to be in charge!!!!” whines the sibling who is literally four years younger and still can’t spell phone without replacing the “ph” with “f”

snitchin little bitches

older sibling: *flicks younger lightly on arm* younger sibling, tears of lies and deceit running down their face while they grin, knowing they will be believed: MOOOOOOOM NAME PUNCHED MEEEEEEEEEE

eat all the sweets

then they will blame it on the older sibling

literally, they will blame anything on the older sibling

watches an r-rated move -> name said it was alright!!!! (i most certainly DID NOT)

“MOOOOOOOOOOM NAME ISNT LETTING ME HANG OUT WITH HER FRIEEEEEENDDDDDDSSS” “YOU HAVE COME WITH US 16 TIMES THIS WEEK”

admittedly, they can be cool 1/324532 of the time. make sure to include these cool moments once in a blue moon bc sadly they do happen

POSSIBLY will feel like older gets more attention sometimes

DEFFINETLY feels like the older gets more freedom

OLDER SIBLINGS

i, as an older sibling, am biased. ill do my best tho

insults the younger sibling (SOMETIMES unfairly actually a lot unfairly)

ill add this to younger in a moment but on the flipside the younger sibling probably feels like the OLDER sibling gets more attention instead

takes out problems on sibling/family (to be fair when younger grows up they do this too)

“pshhhhhhhh, TRUST me, you do NOT want a sibling”

*to friend* “i literally hate him/her/them/other so much. i would kill him/her/them/other if i had the chance” “no you wouldn’t” “are you sure”

“nah man, you can’t talk shit about him/her/them/other, only I can talk shit about my sibling” *immediate fist fight/verbal decimation*

if a younger child is talking shit, they will be BLACKLISTED AND DESTROYED. probably more than is fair.

probably has hurt the younger sibling pretty badly at some point, most likely by accident but if it doesnt fit you storyline,,,, i have done despicable things

underestimates their strength when dealing with younger sibling

“WHY WONT YOU JUST FUCKING LISTEN TO ME” “YOURE NOT MOM” “YEAH BUT MOM PUT ME IN CHARGE DIPSHIT”

“i am not his/her/their/other parent, why do i have to do this”

younger sibling, to older: “son of a bitch” “we literally have the same mother”

“I SWEAR TO GOD CAN YOU EVEN DRESS YOURSELF???? CAN YOU???? CAN YOU????????????”

“haha ur scared of the daaaaaarrrrrrrk” older says, as their brain is in a panic about whether or not there’s a serial killer in the dark room waiting to kill them

so yeah. i have so many metas i need to write about so many things

#writing #writing siblings #siblings in writing #writing tips #do not have your siblings call each other sis or bro #PLEASE IT DOESNT HAPPEN #i need a nap #how to write #how to write siblings #meta #writing meta #siblings meta #my meta #metas

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polandspringz · 2 years

Text

gen:lock S2 Twilight Liveblog:

here we goooooooo

should i pull the bingo board up

i saw the thumbnail seems like henry is too excited about committing war crimes

wait does henry think he'll be spared or is he just going to sit and die

skipping intro bc it is using battle tapes' corpse

thank god migas isnt dead

HOLY SHIT BLOOD

HBO MAX THATS UNNECCESARY

cute we got the it me again

"we;re so happy you're okay." BUT YOU JOINED THE UNION

OH we dropping odin? giant sinclair

so thi-

sorry why does sinclair need to be fucking naked in the mindscape

someone get the spirit halloween nemesis some toothpaste god

im guessing Yaz and Val are going to near die in the plane and thats why they ascend to save themselves

my family get home and i got distracted during cammie's heart to heart w/ chase but im sure it was good

if i have to see that FUCKING KOALA AGAIN

WAIT WHY IS BRONX FLOODING

ok i guess everyone is just DEAD

i literally cannot understand brother tate im sorry

im sorry what rosetta stone

I love how genlocks one floor was that it didnt explain the polity or union's motives at all and so this season they decided to dive into it but somehow didnt explain anything at the same time

im sorry why does sinclair run that slowly its so FUNNY

GOD MRS CHASE WITH NEMESIS WAS SO FUCKING FUNNY "CAN YOU GET THE DOOR" COMEDY GOLD

ALSO I GUESS she's kind of sentient in the mindscape? i liked that detail of the small smile as nemesis walked off

Cammie is just god now okay like good for her but also why isnt anyone else in the flow able ot do this, is it because she's GL compatible that she was able to take over the flow

OH okay cammie dead

Rooting for Dr. Jha to take down the Union from inside

if they kill this other union guy then this show has killed 2/3 of their east asian cast

'AND YOU ARE AN ASSHOLE" IM DYING

genlock s2 may not be good but at least its funny "i cannto believe that worked"

OH ARE WE LOGGED INTO THE NEMESIS CHASE NOW

OH that's why chase has been going crazy has his memories of his mom okay things are coming together FINALLY

Glad chase's father figure now is Nemesis who is also HIMSELF this show is weird

IM SORRY THAT ANGLE OF CHASE CRYING ON THE GROUND IS SO FUNNY BC ITS JUST ASS SHOT SO IM THINKING OF THE "WHY IS EVERYONE SO MEAN TO ME" PHOTO OF MEN SHOWERING

migas help a girl out

OMG KMIGAS????

the flow wants to FEED

glad cammie has more trauma now

HENRY!

So somehow Cammie is still uploaded to the gL network or she can just link up to all technology

they are giving me so many good frames of my boyfriend Dr. Weller in this season at least

I still believe dr. weller is alive i refuse to believe he's dead

oh so we just have

NO THEYRE KILLING HIM AGAIN WHAT THE FUCK NO I CANT DO THIS WHAT THE FUCK DONT DELETE MY DAD nevermind david tennant probably just wants out of this trainwreck of a show

okay by Val

WHY IS THIS EPISODE JUST EVERYONE BONKING INTO THE GROUND

KAZU?!!!

KAZU??!!

oh its the part of kazu left in Val that's painful

BABY CALIBAN

**should i take the upgrade- NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW!**

Well Chase is finally whole again that's cool I was sick of his blood shot eyes

They just crashed the ship into Odin im losing it

I DONT NEED TO SEE SINCLAIR'S DICK

I DONT EVEN NEED TO SEE THE OUTLINE OF WHERE IT WOULD BE

why did they model it. does that mean they planned on using it for something in a deleted scene or a future scene or another season

So I guess by losing Kazu we will gain Sinclair in our party

wait why is he calling holcroft. henry i dont know whether to trust you or not

wow everyone just got EATEN

so i guess next episode is inside the flow

#genlock #gen:lock #gen lock #gen:lock season 2

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thompsborn · 3 years

Note

do you have any spare ironhusbands or sambucky headcanons?

ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY

oh my god okay i’ve been so fucking wrapped up in both ironhusbands and sambucky and absolutely nothing else for WEEKS because of tfatws (obviously if you have seen my endless spam of reblogs but can you BLAME ME) and the portal closed has ironhusbands so i’ve been just. oh my god i am happily drowning in this and them and i do not need nor want air. ok.

also these are all hc’s based just in canon not au, and lol warning this got so long help me, though my brain is so scrambled from tfatws finale that all sambucky thoughts are scrambled and jumbled so i wasn't able to coordinate them as well as ironhusbands so the ironhusbands section is definitely longer pfighf i'm so sorry i'm like this

ironhusbands:

when they met at mit tony didnt know shit. like. like nothing. he didnt know a single god damn thing about anything. like he was a genius he could solve any equation given to him and baffled professors when he was handed like two supposedly impossible equations to this fuckin fourteen year old and he just looked at them with like a mcdonalds burger or some shit hanging out of his mouth and just answered them no problem, but he was still such a hopeless idiot, and rhodey, also a genius attending as a sixteen year old, had to teach him the basics of life, like. making toast. tony how do NOT know how to make toast. its TOAST. you put it in the TOASTER. have you NEVER SEEN A—OH MY GOD HOW DID YOU FUCKING CATCH IT ON FIRE—

he does not perfect the clearly impossible task of making toast until he is 17 and rhodey buys him a cake to celebrate the momentous occasion even though tony went though 528 toasters

you are gold by the national parks. thats it. thats all i have to say. listen to the song and look up the lyrics. you’ll get it.

and also paper planes by jon bellion but specifically for after rhodey tells tony he’s gonna join the air force and tony is worried but doesnt know how to show it and they have like a chill night in and all tony can think about is how stupid he is and how he’s such a coward because he cant get himself to tell rhodey that hi!! i love u!! and im scared to lose u and that you’ll get hurt and maybe die or smth!!

when rhodey finds out about how tony was raised (going with mcu, where tony wasnt physically abused but more emotionally neglected and ignored by howard and always talked down to and compared to others and wasnt treated like he was worthy and never was told he was loved and everything like that) he gets PISSED. like he is MONUMENTALLY angry. and it takes YEARS for him to find out about this too. and it actually puts a bit of a strain on their friendship for awhile when they meet too

like rhodey knows about the starks obviously and he assumes tony is going to be this obnoxious arrogant rich boy asshole and is so not looking forward to being roommates but he was raised to have an open mind and give everyone a chance, but tony was raised to be wary of everyone and keep his walls up and his emotions in shackles because whatever he shows can be used against him, so they clash, you know? they dont fight or anything but theres tension bc it isnt right and they dont get each other.

rhodey tries to be nice and tony doesnt understand nice because his only example of nice is jarvis and his mom and even then his mom and jarvis are always off with his dad so he barely sees them so its still rare for him to experience the nice of them so he doesnt know how to be around someone nice all the time, and so he gets defensive and thinks about how howard drilled it into him to be wary and he thinks maybe rhodey isnt ACTUALLY nice but someone PRETENDING to be

and rhodey starts to feel justified in assuming the worst about tony stark because tony is all cold and distant and rude and is about to stop the keeping an open mind thing about a month into their first year but then he comes back to their dorm early from class one day and tony doesnt come in so rhodey is just standing there and watches for a minute as tony sits there staring down at his twenty sixth attempt at a letter he wants to send his mom becauss he knows his mom likes letters even though he could just call but they havent really called him (howards fault but he’s fourteen still and its hard to rationalize that howards busy life and controlling thumb extends past his son) and rhodey is just confused because tony just suddenly sighs and sniffles a bit and murmurs “this is so stupid” and crumbles up the paper and throws it in the garbage and rhodey cant help but peer into it and barely sees the words hey mom scribbled at the top and that. that. hm. okay.

so rhodey keeps trying because he wasnt supposed to see that but he did and now he kind of has a feeling that maybe tony isnt all that cold and distant and rude as he seems, maybe he just doesnt really know how to be any different, so he thinks about all the subtle little ways that his family has shown him they care about him and starts to invite tony to go get food or to study together even though neither of them really need to study or to help each other with assignments or just anything thats mundane enough to not raise suspicion but still starts to open the door and make tony relax around him just that little bit and then before tony realizes it the end of their first year is there and theyre like friends or something and it hits him that he’s gonna miss rhodey.

for the first time ever there’s someone other than his mom and jarvis that he’s actually going to miss.

rhodey grins at him and says that they’ll be roommates again next year because they have to be and that the summer will be over before they know it and the sentiment is nice but tony spends the summer alone wandering around a house too big and empty after being in a dorm that’s small and has a friend.

but rhodey doesn’t know this. like he knows that tony isn’t the kind of guy he originally assumed but he doesn’t know that he’s literally ignored and neglected and like emotionally and sometimes verbally abused so he’s kind of surprised when the next year begins and they DO end up being roommates again (because tony kind of asked his mom, on a rare day when he got to see her and howard wasnt around, to get mit to make sure they could be) and tony just HUGS him like its been years and they’ve known each other forever but he goes with it and hugs him back because maybe tony’s just more affectionate once he gets to know someone and rhodey is okay w that.

they get closer as the years go by and they graduate from mit together and they’re BEST friends and at the end of the year rhodey invites tony to spend new years eve w his family but tony cant bc howard is having some kind of gala starting at 5 because hes weird and dumb and tony hates it and he also isnt given the option of not going even though he doesnt want to but the entire way there howard drills into him about not fucking up and berates him for all the times he has in the past and when they get there tony is already just not feeling it so he’s like nope!! no!! i simply cannot!!

so he goes in and finds an exit thats in the back and he leaves and finds a fucking payphone of all things and he has rhodeys home number memorized for years now and he calls and someone he doesnt knoe answers and theres music in the background and voices and tony’s entire stomach is in his throat and his heart is sunken into his twisted gut because he just wanted one night where maybe he could smile next to his parents and feel like he fit with them but he couldnt have that and he asks to talk to rhodey and then he is and asks if its too late to accept his invite and rhodey is like yeah of course do u need my address bc its still only 5 pm and its a 2 hour drive between south philadelphia and manhattan so he’d make it with plenty of time before it got to midnight so yay

and tony is like. oh. hm. i dont know how to drive actually. that was a thing that no one ever thought to teach me even though i asked about it about ten million times. and rhodey is used to tony not knowing how to do things that most people their age can (see: the toast) and plus its not uncommon for people from new york to not drive anyway so he doesnt think anything of it and instead asks for tony’s address to come pick him up instead and they’d still make it back by like 9-9:30 so that would work too

and thats when tony is like. well.

about that.

he might be calling from a payphone.

on a random street corner.

and its kind of raining. and he’s cold. and he’s a bit dulled out from everything so he doesn’t really think about the fact that admitting this is going to lead to having to explain what happened and also why and that is happens often. but that doesnt matter because he kind of just wants to be with his best friend and not back at that gala with his dad right now.

rhodey is like,,, ok. ok. wheres a coffee shop nearby u can wait in. and tony thankfully is by a 24 hour one and tells him the name and the street corner its closest to and rhodey is like i’ll be there asap and tony goes and he waits.

a two hour drive turns into an hour and a half because rhodey is Worried™

but when he walks in tony goes from being all dulled out to being all HOLY SHIT because rhodey has a SPLIT LIP and he’s like WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED WHAT THE FUCK WHAT

and rhodey’s like no no its good my uncle was having fun and trying to wrestle with me and he accidentally elbowed me its all good man dont worry about it

tony isnt used to accidentally being hurt tho so he’s still like hmmm but he takes rhodeys word on it and they head out and tony wont say what happened or why he was calling from a payphone ?? which btw tony literally only was able to do bc there happened to be dropped change on the ground because boy would not have change on him ok, but rhodeys like alright lets go with this for now

so they gets to the rhodes house and it is in full swing with family and extended family and adopted family bc they are 100% the family that just adopts the neighborhood kids and the people who have no one else and like ex boyfriends and ex girlfriends even after the relationship ends bc they still are family despite not dating whoever it was they had been dating in order to be introduced to them so its a LOT of people and tony is like. this is semi familiar in terms a lot of people but this is NOTHING like what he has ever seen before holy fucking SHIT

rhodey is just like oh u have a small family then? so ur used to smaller gatherings?

and tonys like wtf are gatherings

and rhodey is starting to get a feel for what might be wrong but just takes tony inside to get him changed because he’s not spending new years eve at the rhodes house in a fucking expensive suit ok

tony is completely out of his element and like he’s not the only white guy there bc again the rhodes adopt people and those people are of every race and nationally you can imagine but he just isnt used to the vibe there are people laughing and sitting close together and playing games and theres music playing but not like classy music its music people can dance to and are dancing to and the food isnt the food he’s used to at galas and shit and nothing is what he’s used to and he just sticks to rhodey’s side like a fucking lost puppy and tries his best not to look like an idiot when rhodey introduces him to people and a lot of them know who he is but dont judge him or assume shit about him bc obviously if he’s friends w rhodey then he’s a good guy and they want to know him and thats enough

but tony is v overwhelmed bc what the FUCK IS HAPPENING this is nothing like anything he has ever experienced EVER

so eventually rhodey can tell he’s getting overwhelmed and takes him inside and lets him have a breather and then asks him about whats going in and thats when rhodey learns about what tonys life at home is really like and. anger.

SO MUCH anger

because not only has every single assumption he has ever made about tony been proven wrong, but now he knows that the best person he knows has never been treated the way he deserves and has never known a true home and comfort and love and safety and

and he’s gonna fix it

and this is the first step

so he takes tony back out and they’re still just friends but this is the day they both quietly realize they might kind of definitely like each other as more because tony is still so confused by the fact that what he knows isnt the normal and overwhelmed by how much there is and how different it is but rhodey holds his hand as a grounding point and whenever it might be too much they move off to the side where they arent completely gone but its less hectic and a bit more quiet and its just nice

tony goes to rhodeys house for every holiday despite whatever howard says

rhodey decks howard the only time they ever meet before tonys parents die and he has the most shit eating grin on his face afterwards that tony cant help but lose his shit laughing his ass off

anyway i didnt mean to ramble for so long about that specific idea so i’ll end the ironhusbands ramble with this one last thought, which is as follows:

rhodey gets hurt in the air force at some point, and it isnt that bad tbh but he does have to go the hospital and shit and gets stitches or whatever idk i dont know what specifically happens i just think it’d be just bad enough that it takes him a few weeks to be able to go back to work but he’s not like OH GOD HURT yk?

but like stated above tony was scared and worried when rhodey told him he was gonna go into the air force so he hears about this and they’re probably like almost 30 at this point because they’re dumb and it takes them forever to get their heads out of their asses (i say this even though in the portal closed it takes them even longer but i digress) rhodey has like his mon his sister his niece visiting him and they were worried but they know hes fine so theyre just talking and in a good mood and then—

door slams open. tony stark enter stage left. disheveled suit, fresh from a meeting he definitely was not supposed to leave, having flown in from maibu the second he heard and then had happy drive him and then got impatient because of traffic and ended up sprinting like ten blocks while happy was like what the FUCK

of course rhodeys family are well aware that these idiots are desperately in love with each other so they’re just like lol ok and just leave the room while tony starts fretting over him like he’s about to die himself if he doesnt know if rhodey is okay and rhodey is like tony tony dude tones stop tony im okay tony stop it

until finally tony just fucking breaks down like full on tears in his eyes voice cracking hands clasped as he leans against rhodeys bed and tells him that he was so scared and he is so scared all the time whenever rhodey is out there because all he can think about is losing him and him getting hurt or dying and it’s maddening and this is when they get their heads out of their asses and kiss for the first time

(irony at its finest bc later when they are married and tony becomes iron man rhodey refuses to not have a suit of his own because if tony is going out there in a metal flying tin can then he isn’t going alone and wow what a power couple)

sambucky:

firstly i’m going to go post tfatws, but i’ll make a bullet point before going into it so if you wanna read up until that point you can but most of this will be random little headcanons based post tfatws

also it isnt like a whole plotline thing like the ironhusbands ones ended up being these ones are more random and kinda all over the place but loosely connected

update from after writing this: i lied

let me start by saying my interpretation of why they are the way they are in civil war is because of steve

thats not saying steve is the bad guy i mean to say that they’re jealous of each other because they thought that THEY were steve’s best friend who the fuck is THIS guy i dont want him here go away

children. they are children.

which i find very funny to imagine from sams pov because he literally is a licensed therapist and would 100% recognize why he’s acting how he is but he’s petty enough to do it anyway

and also he literally was helping steve track bucky down but i like to imagine that sam didnt think they’d ever really find him again and it’d just make him and steve like super mega best friends or something because hes a CHILD

and then from bucky’s pov steve goes through all this trouble to find him and protect him and then this random guy is acting like steve’s best friend and gets to sit in the front seat ??? bullshit. absolutely bullshit. worst thing ever. so stupid.

its so funny to me okay its SO funny

its like that schoolyard thing where your friend makes another friend and you hate it so much that you do something stupid like color on their drawing or put gum in their hair or whatever but they’re adults with 1. super soldier serum or 2. a superhero reputation/avengers status and suit with wings. so thats a thing.

post civil war i dont think they get much yk. because bucky is out in cryo and team cap is on the run and i doubt theyre able to return to wakanda much, if at all, and then it’s infinity war and then it’s endgame and after endgame there’s the aftermath and the aftermath is a mess

i like to think they have some moments before tfatws though. not many but enough for that slight foundation thats we can kind of see in episode 2 yk.

okay NOW it gets into post tfatws so!!

SO post tfatws everything is different because now they not only have spent all this time together, but they understand each other in a way that they didn’t before. in a way no one ever has. not even steve, who may have known them before, but he isn’t here anymore and he wouldn’t understand who they are now vs who they were before and it’s different.

bucky finds comfort in sam’s home town. sam finds comfort in watching bucky find a home there and he doesnt know why.

also sam treats redwing like a puppy and lets him fly around on his own and gets pet and stuff and bucky acts annoyed but the longer it happens you can tell he’s like “oh my god why is this thing endearing”

bucky has nightmares and sam knows this but bucky doesnt know that sam also has nightmares until one night when they’re still in sams home town and they’re staying on the boat because sams nephews are having a sleepover with some friends and they didnt want to get in the way or smth idk i just want an excuse for them to be on the boat and somewhat secluded from people but bucky already woke up from his nightmare and is out on the deck to get some fresh out and then oop

sam havin a nightmare too

because fucking of COURSE sam has nightmares he has been through some shit too!! not being able to catch riley and everything that happened since meeting steve and thanos and he turned to dust alone in the bushes ok like yes everyone that died were traumatized undoubtedly (peter my baby boy baby im so sorry that you got the worst of it) but bucky was around people but sam was laying on the ground and probably just watched his hands as he disappeared and he was alone and like. jesus christ ok.

and then steve trusted him with every weight and everything that comes with the shield not knowing how much more the shield has when he gave it to a black man and just like he has nightmares everyone in marvel does its a fact

but bucky finds out like this and he is shocked even though he realizes he probably should have been able to guess that this is a thing and he knows so much more about sam now than he ever did but this is how he learns more. he learns about riley. he learns so much.

sometimes bucky has those like “oh shit” moments where he’s like “maybe i was kind of a dick to someone who didnt deserve it” and he already had one of those with sam about the shield but he has another one because he assumed shit about sam when they were being all childish and jealous about someone else being friends with steve but like fuck

steve and sam probably got it

the not catching someone. the way it felt to try and to reach out and to miss and to have to choice but to watch as they fell.

what’s different is that steve got bucky back. he got to have that relief, eventually, even if there was the pain of knowing bucky had been taken by hydra, but at least he knew bucky had made it.

sam didn’t have that. riley didnt make it.

therefore, bucky has his “oh shit”

and bucky was already going soft around the edges with sam (as clearly seen in the last two episodes of tfatws, ESPECIALLY the finale because like did tou SEEZ ALL THE HEART EYES oh my GOD) but it’s this that really makes something in him melt and he just. he loses the last remnants of whatever tension or resentment or whatever negative feeling he may have been clutching onto.

there wasnt much left. but now theres none. now its all washed away.

its gone, and he gets it.

sam is a licensed therapist and he knew the reason he was being all dumb and childish and jealous with bucky was because steve had another best friend but also because steve’s other best friend was the guy that had been a big factor in how him and steve understood each other and how they bonded and it

it had kind of felt like they lost part of that when they found bucky again in civil war and he kind of wanted to blame bucky for it even though he didnt actually blame him at all so all it translated to was that dumb kind of jealous thing instead

but now it’s just them. its sam and bucky and it isnt steve and it isnt about steve and it shouldnt be because its about them. its about the boat and the water and the way they sit and watch the waves while the silence settles over them and the way that bucky says, “im sorry.”

its the way sam says, “me too.”

and bucky says, “you dont have to be.”

its the way they stay there until sarah comes to get them for breakfast and sams nephews convince them to play with them and their friends and the world is still shit and there is so much to do but

but its this and its them and that can wait

it can wait

they can take their time if they want to

maybe they’ve earned that much, at least

(it isn't a fast development because they're a complicated pair and there's so much to the two of them that need to figured out individually before they can even realize how well they work together, but the steps are so much easier knowing that they have the other in their corner and bucky knows that sam's home town is a place he's welcome to go and sam helps him make his own dreary little apartment into something that feels real and tangible with a bed and a couch and when they've become something that resembles stable and they've found a balance and they're okay, that's when they realize that maybe they can try for the more that sometimes bubbles under their skin and that they started to think about the more they spend time together. the warmth that sam feels every time he sees bucky playing games with his nephew and the smile that bucky has to fight to hide and still can't fully suppress when sam stands tall and proud with the shield in its rightful place, and it takes time, it takes work, it takes carefully placed bricks to build the foundation they need, but they get there, and when they do...

when they do, they're already happy, and it just makes them happier, and that's what makes it so much better.

that's what makes it worth the wait.)

#ironhusbands #sambucky #headcanons #asks

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