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gumballavocadoharry · 7 months

Text

A white house with a picket fence:

*MerylStone is a made up town in Vermont, Woodstock*

The sky skirted itself on the horizon of nightfall, emitting glints of stars; beaming like mood lights wrapped around the headboard of a teenage bedroom. Even the mellowness of nature, couldn't halt the clamorous roars of the incessant debate over your son, Lincoln's curfew. "Lincoln, for the last time! You're only 18 years old! You don't need a midnight curfew." Harry shouted from across the couch. Lincoln huffed and stormed to his bedroom without saying another declaration. Harry plopped down, hands smacking into his face, his breath huffy and shaky.

The faded ghosts of your husband's slipper marks bored a loud tense firmament throughout the living room.

"Why do kids think once they're 18, they're adults?" He sighed, "Don't they know how hard it is out there?" You swallowed gasps of breaths that you always held inside like gas in a balloon during tense engagements; something that you've learned in your youth. You squished next to Harry on the couch; almost on cue, started rubbing his shoulders and back. "He'll come around honey....it just takes time."

"Yeah, well too much," A gulp escaped Harry's throat, "What's out there that we can't give here? I mean....we gave him so much freedom...what is it that he wants?" Even you had to shrug to that. "I don't know. Maybe he sees his friends with their own apartments, going to college, being away from their parents and...." You stopped yourself. "What, you think he's tired of us?" Harry's voice sprung more hostility than he wanted. "I think he just needs some space." A correction to your first thought is what Harry wanted to hear in this moment.

You didn't want the thought to echo in your head for too long; Lincoln has his own job, money, he just saved up and bought a car and not to mention the legal status of his age had given him a birthright advantage.

It petrified you and you knew it did Harry as well; just the inkling of Lincoln's moving away from home, your only child stuck something unpleasant in you. All the time, energy, emotion and love that you invested into your best investment would now crave something more than the walls of his juvenile home; something better, better relationships, ones he would devote endless time to. Not even batting an eyelash to his parents, but to the friends who could only show him desire vs the worldly wisdom from his parents. The realization was gut wrenching in itself but the duplicitous fantasy that this was all stemmed for parental love ate away at the truth.

You knew deep down, what haunted your thoughts, what made your blood run cold was the idea of Lincoln forgetting you and Harry; other relationships would cloud his mind, leaving nothing but hollow postcards of updates from his life. Picturing the unruffled but customarily greeting written in black cursive ink, with only a memo of his life so far with a picture flipped to the back of an older version of your son, black sweater, coffee cup, kids curling on his lap, wife positioned only slightly above his shoulders, would highlight a missing piece of his life; once forgotten and discarded like old news clippings with no purpose.

Little did you know, Lincoln had been listening to the conversation you were having with Harry. The boy's blood boiled, mind caviling at the thought of being chained here the rest of his life. Like a house arrest without an official seal of proof. Chafing at the lack of support for his own liberty, but aiding to their own selfish whims gritted Lincoln's teeth. Years of protesting to this very moment, to these years....were finally coming to an end. Tonight, Lincoln would self free from his sentence and he would finally grapple things differently. His foot moved patiently across the hallway, like he was in no hurry to challenge his stone locked mind. He had a car, money and the night to guide him through this plan.

Sitting at his desk was the first things his eyes scanned to. The desk lamp illuminated the circling dust particles that would land invisibly onto the grainy dark maple desk top. Lincoln's eyes stood for a long time at the the second drawer; neighboured bellow the first tall skinny one. It carried his notebooks, packs of pencils and unopened highlighters, varying in every color of yellow, pink, blue, green, orange and purple. He took shy steps towards his chair, carefully pulling on the fringes of it and sitting down in it, adjusting himself to a comfortable writing stature. Lincoln's fingers gripped around a pen, snagging a notebook from a drawer and inched only a few centimeters away from the page. Holding the pen in his thumb and pointer strictly, he wrote out a small introduction.

The sound of his heart beating echoed like a drum throughout the bedroom. Ballpoint making its way across the paper, scattering out years worth of pent up angst. The sudden open of Lincoln's bedroom door reflexed him to crumbling up the paper and shoving it into bin under his desk. An easy investment against walking across the room or slingshotting a paper only to miss and have to pick it up in the first place. "Lincoln.." Harry stuttered on his words, "It's time for bed." His voice, guttural and his eyes scanning the dark room for anything that could spark an argument. But nothing: the bed was made perfectly, the floors were spotless, desk was clear and so was Lincoln's face; calm, relaxed and deadpan. Lincoln gave a simple nod, settling himself up from the desk and walking out in the middle of his bedroom.

He waited till the door closed and Harry's footsteps grew father and father away. Lincoln grabbed his robe, pulling the strings and using it as a clasp for the door by tying one end to the leg of the desk and the other to the doorknob. He tore another piece of paper from his most used orange notebook. It was a study one he had picked out himself, wanting to make the most of its use for his notes on binary and coding. The ballpoint of the pen positioned itself onto the paper before writing a carefully crafted goodbye. The once diluted blossom sky mixed in a orange powder now was a somber cloak of dark maroon blue. Looking out the window were only half appearing house silhouettes and the faded glow of the end corner streetlights. Something Lincoln would rely on once it came to moving fastly out of the driveway.

Sealing the letter on the desk, lying lifelessly, Lincoln now turned his attention to his closet. Grabbing his duffel bag and shoving shirt after shirt, jeans after joggers, sneakers after loafers and even the small accessories; watches, wristbands and rings were all sealed into sandwich bags. The closet was empty. Only a few hangers swayed silently in the shadow on a vacant little rack that held dress shirts, t-shirts with crazy designs of cats and lightning bolts and pants of all types shoved into the little drawers above.

Next, the hidden piggy bank. It was really a jewelry box his mother gifted him as a purpose of hiding all his action figures. But now filled in it was hundreds of dollars. Maybe even more than that. Lincoln didn't hesitate to shove the rolls of hundreds into little sandwich bags and stuffing his wallet with 500 dollars, sliding it in perfectly as if the wallet had carved out spaces for the thick stacks of paper to be slickly slid in without hesitation. The dust particles zig zagged around as the body of Lincoln was all over his bedroom, gathering every possible and necessary thing to show with him on his journey. His backpack, filled with textbooks and his notebooks from his desk.

The desk lamp, nick nacks, scissors, pencils, pens, markers, whiteout....everything that had a resemblance to Lincoln being on that desk was now gone. His whole bedroom with exception of his bed, comforters, and the desk and chair itself was empty and hollow. Like Lincoln was never there at all. The cell phone that had a tracker on it- installed by his parents- was now dead. Shoved into the same box where his action figures lied. He had gifted himself a new cell phone, new laptop, new tablet....nothing could make his parents find his empty tracks. There would be none. Only the lingering scent of his presence that now had vanished into the simple mist of air that his fan blew lightly into the mucky humid bedroom.

Lincoln turned off the desk lamp, closed the blinds, untied the door and hung the note in full view on the front door of his former bedroom. As he sighed, Lincoln glanced one last time at the childhood home he once knew and loved before closing his bedroom door quietly and tiptoeing down the stairs. He disarmed the alarm of the house and walked out without so much as a goodbye. The street was tranquil, only the sounds of crickets were heard. As Lincoln's eyes adjusted to the dark, the houses then appeared. The aromatic husky smell of the night sent waves of calm through Lincoln. He kept his feet solid on the pavement, taking quiet yet shattered steps from the walkway of the house, down to the garage where he kept his used dark gray chevy. The keys jingled slightly from opening the car door and then being plugged into the emission.

The sound of the car starting made Lincoln flinch. But nothing. No one woke, nothing but the sound of sleep and hollowness. Slamming the car door, Lincoln pulled from the driveway, swerving his tires to the main road and stepping on the gas, breaking free from the neighborhood. One last look to the house that sat so perfectly, so white, so big and sheek with its flowered bushes and fancy exterior that matched its neighboring houses styles. The hue that once glowed there had now burned out. Exhausted itself into just another house on a fancy road. Mom and Dad's house. Lincoln had already left mentally, but it was his physical appearance that would have to relinquish.

The morning was quiet. Peaceful. Like any other morning for a picket fence home. You were quiet, having already seen Lincoln's 'surprise' on his bedroom door and then opening it to see emptiness broke inside of you. You just didn't show it. You kept it hidden; festering it inside until it could explode at the right time. You let Harry sleep in as you did with keeping the note on the door for him to discover himself. Instead, you busied yourself with the morning dishes, cooking an English breakfast. The voice of the alarm blaring and the creak of the bed grew into a warm patch on the back of your neck that slugged down to your legs and back. It was numbing and heating in a juxtaposition way. You carefully listened to Harry's footsteps trail over to the right: Lincoln's room. The footsteps stopped for a few moments.

"He's reading the note." you thought. The jiggle of Lincoln's doorknob opening and the pattering of Harry's footsteps trailing into his room like a cave with hidden treasures. There was silence. The same one that smothered the clattery of Lincoln's midnight departure. Your face went cold. Eyes dazed and body in a stillness, not knowing the next step of your husband's reaction.

"Looks like the boy held to his promise." Harry thought. You, turning off the stove, setting the pans aside, goose stomped upstairs in jointace with your husband. But his face was just as casual as yours. No matter how hard you tried, the ringing of Lincoln still hung dry in the room. His bed, just perfect the way he left it. Except it was cold, straight...not one wrinkle in between the sheets of covers.

The desk lamp was still bended in its crooked position. Hunched over the desk counter, sitting alongside with the empty cubbies and dead pictures. Pictures that represented milestones in Lincoln's life. The sailboat Harry helped hang up for 3 year old Lincoln, newspaper clippings framed as a decor for his mystery phase of 12 year old Lincoln, 17 year old Lincoln- just a year ago- hung a lion picture. The only picture that was taken along with Lincoln but not the rest. They all stared at the broken pair of you. Like they grew eyes and taunted you like a buzzing fly that wouldn't leave the room no matter what.

The closet was empty. Any signs of Lincoln were dead. Like he never existed in this room. A sudden grown dread ran though you, leaping you from Harry's side and opening the bottom dresser drawer and snatching out the jewelry box. Opening it was the dead cellphone you had gifted him for his 16th birthday. You and Harry- like all the other cellphones you gave your son- had decided that the rule would be no different. It was never discussed with Lincoln, but always just there. Like it was attached to the cellphone when you bought it fresh from the apple store. He never questioned it, but somehow you knew he hated it. But there it was. Dead. Like Lincoln's bedroom. The life that was in it had dissipated with him. It was like a slap in the face. A reality check warning you were you were headed. Now its too late.

Lincoln was gone and god knows where he could be. What could you do? Call the police? Force them to bring a legal adult back home to his Mommy and Daddy? A gap of air went down with your tears. You swallowed them, ate at them and ignored them. But they still came out anyway. Your mascara smudging, traveling down your cheeks like a riverbank. You couldn't turn and face Harry. It would only make him mask more of his pain. A feeling you both hated to admit to yourselves.

"Well, I'm hungry." Harry walked past you, swishing a rampant of coolness past him. He was so nonchalant and aloof like he had just saw any old car scamper down the street. His son, his child was gone, nowhere to be seen, and this was his reaction. Broad fury infatuated you before dying down at the command of your mind. It just didn't seem like a battle worth fighting for. Walking down the hall now felt ominous and cleft. Like someone had ripped out a chunk of the house and planted a graveyard, burying Lincoln's body in it. Your stomach felt queasy yet empty. The wooden floors were cold and creaky, the stairs felt uneven and crooked like you were walking on floating rocks. The whole house felt dead. Cold, sterile and lifeless. The presence that once filled this house with chroma; giving complexion to the interior of it had bleed itself onto wherever Lincoln was.

Your feet stopped at the door frame of the kitchen. Harry was munching away on the toast that was set in front of him, sipping his coffee, catching up with the lastest on google news. Half of you wanted to slap him so hard that it would ricochet the sense of the matter into him. While the other half wanted to bungle up into his arms and cry copiously, choking on every breathe, gasping on every tear and squeezing some more out while he kissed the tiny stalks of hair on your scalp so deeply that you could feel his pointed lips puckering tightly, pressuring into your skin, whistling into a husky smooch once suctioned off.

But instead, you almost tripped on your own feet walking into the kitchen while Harry barely bat an eye. If he even cared enough to notice at all.

You turned your concentration towards the sink; eyes focusing on the single drips from the faucet, pulsing a beat on the sink floor with water beads lying all around it. It was the rolling sound your stomach made that made you grab a plate and plop the work of your family breakfast onto it. You sat directly across from Harry, staring down at your plate; bacon, two sunny side up eggs staring back at you, baked beans, fried tomatoes and toast just laying there lifeless onto your plate. Meanwhile, with the slithering glimpses of Harry just munching away at his breakfast like it was just any old morning. Like he had never ever known Lincoln, like he didn't exist was unpalatable in itself. You made it through breakfast barely, but upon stuffing your dishes into the sink, one of them slammed down harder then intended and broke a half of itself off.

Tears flooded your eyes; dropping the broken piece of stoneware into the sink and rushing to the phone. Your fingers, mucky, damp, thick with a bludgeoning adrenaline and fingertips dipped with humidity slowly dialed the numbers of Lincoln's number almost with the same carefulness a prisoner makes in calling the number of his lawyer or attorney. But it was just a hum of static on the other end. You dialed it again, static. Again, static.

No mistakes and no active number. Maybe more carefully.

"Hello? This is Parestake house, can I get a phone number for your order?" The lady's voice, dry and polite, but rather tired from the same busy rumination of answering with the same motto. But there was no response; hanging up without any apology for the wasting the time of someone completely oblivious to the situation.

Slamming the phone into its hook and sitting down on the couch to collect thoughts of what would eject Lincoln from this house so quickly, so quietly, yet so prepared. Like this wasn't a random thought....this was something that had been slithering through the depths of this house for a long time. Creeping through the brain of Lincoln for longer than you and Harry were led to believe. You and him both knew where you stood on Lincoln's heavily monitored independence. The words "I'm moving out" would've knocked a bitter drip into you. Like poison medicine in an IV drip. Springs of arguments would've poured out into the house, booming into threats, a fury of words that would have spilled from Harry's mouth and slapping Lincoln in the face with them. He knew that.

So he left quietly and quickly like a mouse of the night just like he wanted. No regrets and no returns.

Lincoln had settled himself nicely into his apartment. The space had been sitting empty for a solid month. The landlord didn't argue with the young and less experienced tenant upon realizing the boy was a lot smarter and prepared than his prejudiced mind had allowed him to comprehend. Lincoln being one of the youngest residents in the building was one of the mildest. Never throwing loud parties, no loud music, complaints didn't exist and above all, just a forgettable neighbor. Accompanying inside his new home was a calm iguana, Orb. Despite not having a couch, dining table or bed yet, Lincoln still made the small space a home; old bedroom pictures hung the walls of his bedroom, and the desk nick nacks were the new decor of the living area.

Taking his money and setting the groups of hundreds down on the table, organizing them into rent, electronics, food, lighting, furniture, and heating for those colds winters. Gas was complimentary of the landlord. Using a blow up mattress, Lincoln still made it up like it was the real thing. After all, he took pride in the freedom he now had. Despite being materially poor.

But that would soon change once Lincoln got his footing. A lot could happen in a years worth of time.

The blustery blossoms were rattled by the gusts of spring air that circled through the block. The white house sat empty, and you had sat emptier on the bed in your bedroom, watching Harry walk back and forth by you, straightening his tie for work. A voice in you broke; not knowing where it was coming from. "I tried calling Lincoln yesterday..." Your voice drifted to the fireplace, your glance finally turning your head there. Harry stopped for a moment before returning his attention to his tie. "And?" His voice, rasp with that albion accent, but still enriched with some sternness. "He didn't respond," You looked towards the fireplace again, "I think he changed his number in fact."

"He didn't call or text at all? No response from him whatsoever?" Harry questioned. His voice beckoned slight alarm. You shook your head. "Nothing." Harry bit the side of his lip. "Maybe...." Harry looked up to you. You took a deep breath and sighed, swallowing any rising fear because you knew what your husband's reaction would be to such a notion.

"Lincoln is 18...he's almost an adult. Kids leave for college around this age. If he did move somewhere, it was most likely with a friend or someone he trusts?" Even you and Harry couldn't deny that Lincoln was very trustworthy. A good kid, something you both took for granted. Lincoln cared just enough about pleasing his parents. That was it at the the end of the day....pleasing..not worshipping.

You could see Harry's anger through the collar of his shirt. His vein bulged out from his neck, throat pushing down a hard scoop of vile. "Maybe...but we're still calling the police if he doesn't want to respond." You couldn't deny the way Harry said it. He meant it to assert control. Something that he would never get in this situation. "We could...." Your husband turned to you. But you just sent him a shrug. Harry pierced his eyes into you like needles, before shaking his head collecting his suitcase. You swallowed your ideas and watched from the window as Harry's dark cherry red Honda left the garage and drove down the street.

You stumbled back over to the bed, plopping down and fiddled with the silver diamond studded band that held a decent sized diamond on your left hand, ring finger. How embedded it had been into your hand for the past 28 years. How hard it was for you to get it. Woodstock, Vermont. Your hometown, raised by your father in the sleepytown of MerylStone. The rich blanket of green grass that sprouted stalks upon stalks of it over the hills of the countryside, shining and echoing its sunny glow in the inaugural of summer. You remembered it there with some fond memories.

The big brick house on Swiva Street; its white window panes and shutters, the creaky swingset in the backyard, the arenaceous walkway -that was covered over in concrete that one summer- that led right up to the house and the shrubby bushes on either side of the house that your late mother's roses would spring out of every spring. Pa called it "heaven's little gift for taking your Ma." Your father worked as a workshop teacher at the local high school you attended. You had this allure towards books, science, biology. Potential to be something of your own credit. But Pa had his own idea of you; living in the house, baking cookies, feeding the children, catering to a husband freshly picked from the rounds of other 'good country boys' in the town.

"I'm not sure if biology is a major you can keep up with baby girl," Your causal sideway look eyerolls were a ritual whenever Pa's old fashioned aims vexed you. "Home Ec is more your speed, other girls would love to take this class! What's wrong honey? Don't you wanna learn how to sow a proper dress?" You would learn: by books, demonstrations or something else besides a dainty old class meant for girls. Only girls.

Stuffing the advice, you took the Home Ec classes to save face of your father's job. But college was different. You had your life set in stone; independent from you father's plans. "Yn, you don't need no college education. It's just a waste of money. You just settle yourself down with a nice boy, like Landon Pines only a few blocks up the street. You'll make a lovely housewife and mother...I'm sure of it." The thought of settling in this town is what thrusted your hands faster in packing away your clothes and everything else in between into two large suitcases, two duffle bags and a backpack. "Yn I-"

"Pa....look. I just don't want that for myself right now. Maybe someday in the future, but not now. I wanna be something more than that." And lord knew the backwards town would support a notion like that. How scuffling it was just to learn to drive. Pa lightened up when his heart started weighing him down. Driving him to the hospital quieted him just a little about keeping your 'little fingers' off the wheel. Pa looked into your soft eyes. His hands touching your cheeks, realizing this meant goodbye. Goodbye for good.

You'd much rather prefer the busy nightlife of New York or Boston, California or London. No old dirt or grassy fields. Instead, being replaced with thick walls of buildings that would tower a shadow over the city. From there, it was London. The college you had accepted on first invite. Your last year was when you had met Harry. His adze emerald orbs, Clark Kent curls, deep crater dimples and bunny smile. A financial planning student, locked eyes with you in study hall. Harry's deep reasoning of the world drew you in like bee to a flower. Harry, would invite you into his dorm to 'study'; painting the walls of his first apartment, a honeybee yellow before curling up into his satin navy blue sheets. And even after graduation, Harry saw a future with you.

His company of boomed, exploding within the first couple months of his investment and savings. But Harry didn't need riches, he had them already planted into his family seed. Gemma, his sister inherited her share before taking off to her journalism passion. "Now don't you two get into any trouble." Harry's mother, Anne, would state. Although, delivered in a playful manner, the pair both knew exactly what she meant. The Styles family were of an aristocrat sort, priding their name with glory and perfection, to the best they could deliver. It was something codeded into Harry's blood. Into Gemma's blood, Anne's....and soon, Yn's. You had taken the family name at the tender age of 25. Harry scraping by only a year her senior.

Your acceptance into the Styles family uprooted uproar. Not from Anne, no. But Pa. "You're engaged! To him!" Was his reaction upon hearing of his daughter wanting to marry a one of the supercilious type. But Harry's cavaliering ways were non-existent. He showed Pa the upmost respect, even when the normally mellowed man would patronize him with the most derogatory and yokel allegations. "Yn, what's wrong with Bruce Candem or Holt Jackner?" You shrugged those suggestions off, "They're not my type."

"But this macaroni is? He's no strapping treasure. Is that how you are? Some little macaroni?" Your face grew hot and sweat dripped from your temples. The blazing sun was no way to discuss this manner. "I guarantee...he'll leave ya! Just you wait Yn...he'll find someone who will satisfy him and then it'll be over!" But you had already ran from the hill and into a taxi cab, shooting you straight back to Boston, where a new home was waiting for you and your new husband. The last you saw of Pa was when he made a debut at the wedding, dragging along country folk that you had outgrown years ago. Their bleak minded views were no longer holding reign to your now freed polished and worldly ones. It had fizzled inside of you since birth and being born in the wrong place was just a simple mistake.

Your face grew tomato colored, glancing over to see your rustic souvenirs from the past, give harsh glares to the modern world of Harry's family. You tried to pay no attention; settling your eyes on Harry's green ones before sealing your vows with a kiss.

The twinkle of the wind chimes from Mrs. Laundbary's front porch sent a cooling sensation through you. It was like you could smell from the glass of the pine from the trees, the dew of the grass and the tickle of the wind. The house; tranquil, capacious...silent. No one home. You were alone in the midst of a blank home. Paintings hung with shiny timber or aureate frames, vases sculpted from scarce stones and decor hanging over the white walls, shadowing their singular designs over the home. Your footsteps into the hallway echoed like those of an empty museum. Cold, tense, fragile; everything too expensive to touch. They all represented Harry's taste: the derelict of stabling a proper piece of sentimentalism.

Even in your morning gown, your body still couldn't tug the wrap of such lavish silk. Like a stranger's body had morphed itself into this home, the surreal life. A home you knew well from physical travel. The ins and outs of the kitchen, the walk-in closet you and Harry shared, the master bedroom; a lounge to you and Harry and the well sunlit backyard patio; barbeque roasts, pool parties and simple sunbathing while Lincoln cavorted away in the backyard. But all this, the white mansion, the sumptuous neighborhood...nothing felt like your own. Just Harry's. It could've been yours. Maybe better.

You still had your degrees; hung somewhere in the basement with nothing for it to live under. Harry was the CEO of, Styles Inc. The multi million dollar corporation that catered to cars, planes, buses, trains, lavish transportations. Once that had happened, why bother working? Stay home, tend to the house, care for the plants, cook the meals, maybe even bake a cake just for the sake of it...at least that's what Harry said. He didn't mean it to be a step down for you; putting dollar bill after dollar bill into your hard earned education, to prove to yourself and your lout old town that a woman could be something more than their society of bumpkins. But...it was a waste. Escaping the prison of MerylStone, only to land yourself back into what your father had envisioned from the start halted you.

It wasn't until a week after Pa's funeral; the testator had assigned for you to clear out the home of your father, which meant a plane ride from Boston to Vermont. The old brick house hadn't changed a bit. The dusty tan welcome mat had eerily saved its writing still in its bought condition. The old windchime had pieces missing like those of broken teeth. The country hillside, the lush blanket of grass was now just grass. An empty home sitting below the little hill wasn't so cute anymore. Now..abandoned. You'll never forget the chill of your spine that slithered itself inside of you, as you cleared away everything that coincided your father ever being here.

Your old bedroom, still had its shadows from your old posters. Being in the ghosttown of the house gave you the same feeling walking into Lincoln's dead bedroom. The moving men packed your father's old things into boxes, moving the heavy things like couches, beds, and heavy dresses into moving trucks with your instructions. But before taking the old grainy nightstand by Pa's bed, you opened it to find his old bible with the red page sides pressed together into this bulky red velvet line. Just the feel of the soft leather brought you back into your senses. Memories of college, woodshop class in highschool, Home Ec....they all marked you into this person of who you wanted to be. So caught in day to day life of being a housewife, that you had slowly sunken into this mold of a lie. Pa was right....despite marrying rich, despite all your biology studies, London college......you still became nothing more but just a housewife.

Slamming the bible down into the drawer, you husked yourself out of the house, over the hill and into the rental car, speeding off to the nearest airport. You foot heavily pressed to the pedal, mind flashing in different directions all afraid to go to the one that haunted you the most. Pa was dead...there was nothing more to prove. The ring somehow tightened around your finger. Maybe to yourself? Harry was the one you loved happily ever after right?

He was at the office, as usual. It was just business...it was always business. Signing checks, business meetings in Colorado, Canada, Ohio and whatever you could think of. But he was home before you; coming back in the evening, settling your sunflower hat down on the rack, ripping the heels from your feet, unbuttoning the first two buttons of your light pink dress shirt and running your fingers through your thick strands. "He's really gone Harry. Pa's dead," You looked toward the window, "If you could get hedges in the morning, that would be nice." Harry just stood there, washing his dinner dishes. That was all to be said about Pa ever again.

Harry typed away at his computer, the usual smell of lavender hitting the edges of the office. There sat a tilted slightly mahogany framed picture of you and Lincoln. No sight of himself, but on purpose, as this was just something to remind him of those long work hours. The sight was a refreshing reminder to "not get into any trouble." The grayish colored room was nothing new to the CEO. Harry had been in and out of these rooms for as long as he could remember. There was nothing special of it as he knew this is where he would be. There was nothing else. His only partner that filled him day to day was empty hidden bottle of vodka under the desk. It helped him focus on some days when his hours just didn't numb the world out enough. Something he justified with layering the evening drink with his usual morning cup of joe.

He picked himself better than to be just another ritzy boy to snag off his parents loot without earning his name, his keep. Anne and Desmond boasted to him and Gemma to always make a name for themselves. Of course, they were entitled to as much money as their desires could carry, but nevertheless, it always thumped within the siblings to be their own Mr. or Mrs. Styles. The depths of their castle like mansion spoke volumes of its own. The posh interior of the house matched the cultivated taste of the family. The light gray walls were accented with light tealish blues and silver powdered with white. Those summers where the branched tickled the windows of the terrace and the lush poofy bushes looked like a painting hanging in a museum. The light gray house with a curve on the tip of the roof; racking its color in blush dark peach held the proper expectation to the public as did the inside.

Toying with the silver band on his finger, Harry finally racked up some numbers and matched them a check before clicking out for lunch. His breath was thick, eyes lumpy like they had been glued to a bright screen for days. They side eyed the picture, focusing closely on Lincoln. His preppy boy smile with his father's dimples and his mother's chin.

Those eyes, green and wide like his, but his nose and cheeks were rosey tinted like his mother's. Harry had underestimated the innocent little 8 year old he had known all his life. Those games of catch in the backyard, mushy bedtime stories and well calculated tactics of getting little Lincoln to eat half of his vegetables. The day Lincoln learned to crawl was when Harry's back was turned to the stove, heating up water in the boiling pot. He turned to see the giggling baby take rickety steps to his dad, before falling back down on the tiles to his little hands and knees. "Oooh!" Harry squealed, taking him in his arms and looking into his big eyes. "Did my little boy take his first steps?" Harry cooed, puckering his lips and kissing Lincoln's chubby cheek. Looking deep into his sugary eyes, not wondering what his little eyes were grasping, but more of what he was hiding from his father behind those cuddly looks.

It was shortly after you had lost Pa, the funeral had been now a solid 4 months behind you. Harry had been in his home office, figuring out the latest code for an account. The traction in the house was cabled. It was this thin wire of pondering looks and gagged words between the pair of you. Those stomach aches and backaches were nothing more than stress pins from what you were carrying in between. It wasn't until those 3 missed periods that you wheeled yourself to the doctors.

Sitting the cold unblemished waiting room of the obstetrician's office sent shudders through your gut. Goosebumps and raised hairs sprouted despite it being the dead of fall which prompted a sweater with slide on blue jeans and ugg boots. You tried to focus on the chipped white paint of your fingernails that had been wearing the color for almost a week and a half, instead of the fancy lab coats that swung by in the harmony with the nurses. Dr. Katz, your doctor swung by in her white lab coat, currant red blouse that was neatly tucked into the gray dress pants she donned and the clickety black high heels that clicked with every sophisticated movement. Grabbing files- your files- handing them off to nurses in their varying scrub designs with loose stethoscopes dangling around their necks, silver watches around their wrists, rolled up undershirts....the aesthetic was dreamlike. This was what you wanted....you remembered shadowing Dr. Hawke around the hospital before you had married Harry. The dream of being an established individual with a husband to side part you, not him just to show for your success.

Those sacrifices....were not something easy to let go of. Harry had promised to provide for you....but it wasn't enough. No, you needed the thrill of working, the smell of sterile hospital rooms was a second home for you, possibly a first one.

"Yn Styles?"

The name is what brought you back down to earth. A name that wasn't yours, only a jagged extension of something you had realized long ago. Those seven letter words flashed through your mind like a strike a lightning. Was it too late? Those years had become dull, hardened and pinching when understanding this was not what was expected from the vows of a man and woman. You kicked yourself for thinking of such an easy way out.

Pa was dead and the townsfolk were not completely eradicated from your memory. Word back home would be of a wiseacre from everyone who watched you walk away from their illiterate sleepytown and ram into this big city with better opportunities. Coming back to it, would confirm a thought you had shoved yourself to distance from. You had only yourself to prove to at this point.

But, on the call of the name, you still rose from the chair and walked to the exam room, taking a seat on the table.

"Well, Mrs. Styles..the reason for your missed periods is," Dr. Katz turned to her clipboard, grabbing a long paper and handing it to you, "You're pregnant." A pin dropped. "What?" You wanted to hear those words again. "You are 5 weeks pregnant." She pointed to the little indefinite fetus that had formed in your uterus. A smile transpired and you found yourself more animated. Once leaving the building, in the car, you took one last look at the hospital before throwing the ultrasound pictures to the passenger seat.

"No use for that now." You thought before turning the key and starting the engine. The light of the cloudy afternoon sky shined a glimpse of light onto the black and white picture of you and Harry's 18 year long project. Maybe...just maybe....it could spark something in between the pair of you again. You hoped.

Harry upon getting the news he would become a father delighted him. He questioned the wait of it, wanting to impose another name into the Styles inheritance. The nursery was all set, pictures of balloons, a bouncy yet firm crib, styled in the corner was large teddy bear, tied with a blue bow around his neck. The little detailed decor had come only after discovering that your baby was a boy. Lincoln Styles, was to be his name. Harry insisted it, the social plucking of someone with such an adjustable yet polished name suited someone of his variety.

The countless hours sitting at his desk, windling away at his computer, matching up number after number for accounts, upgrades for his machines and meetings discussing the latest car or train or bus. Following in Desmond's footsteps of being a businessman, Harry knew the unpalatable hours and the sharp work ethic he would have to acquire himself to. But he didn't mind. Seeing his company expand; rapid with his unsalable ideas and adroitness of the workplace. Fumbling over his pen, he caught a swift smell of Luna's, his secretary's perfume.

Luna herself was married with 4 children. Her husband, Hugh, a president of Sincomet, a rubber company, knew the ins and outs of CEO world, as he was tightly under one himself. But even more so, Luna understood the tough reign his job would contribute to the household. It was one Christmas party, an office one that was held at the Parkstor Community Center, she had revealed her upbringing was one of the same polished ave as her boss's. "My mother had old money, but my father ran this clothing design company. It was passed down to him from decades of other relatives." Her mention of this was brought up when Harry had shared his very much indistinguishable childhood himself. Hugh was of the same material; sharing knowing glances with his wife of how aware they were of each other.

Luna and Hugh connected like lego blocks of a puzzle. Both of the same refined culture they cherished near to their hearts..but it was the understanding of a certain way of life that fully brought perspective to them.

You stood by the punch bowl, glancing towards you husband, taking casual sips of punch. Harry looked down at his loosely laced shoe lace on his black loafer. Eyes squirming to you bleakly before gunning down to the floor again. Your beach style white dress was nothing compared to Luna's burgundy Ralph Lauren dress that hung elegantly above the knees that were covered by black sheer pantyhose. It was her apparel that made Harry question himself why she would be working such a banausic secretarial job, when she could be home enjoying the generosity of her riches. She had a strong work ethic. Busying herself with the day to day tasks of answering phone calls, scheduling meetings and lunches, rather than sitting in a dusky house all day.

The contrast effect of the two housewives was risible. Taking shattered looks to you and then Luna, sparked a quivering thought into Harry's mind. If it wasn't for your siren call in college; painting that old apartment, the effusive intimacy in those silk sheets, the way Harry traced those curves, remembering them like a map of a hidden path in the brazilian forest and those tender winter blue kisses on his lips and cheeks. If all that didn't' exist, then.....would he have married a Luna type?

Someone of the same social class, same upbringing- knowing the tight views of acceptable - or having a refined definition public. Never having to keep watchful eye of his spouses history in a hick town with her hillbilly of a community. She would fit right in with the Styles clan; having a well rounded view of society and money. Really, your own merit of sophistication is what united the two of you in the first place. Harry took a risk at 26 as did you; sealing in vows that wouldn't make sense only a year from when they first came about. It was the then, that he dragged you out of the party, mouth ajar like he wanted to speak, but suckled in his the last of his energy for the night. "Did Preston sign the account?" Harry, eyes steeled on the road, knuckles white and solid on the wheel, still managed to shake out a: "Yes darling, yes he did."

Putting his hand on your thigh, forcing a rush through his body like heroin. He pinched this tight smile together, showcasing enough of his little boy dimples, but his eyes were nuanced and dingy. It would remain that way until you both arrived home with different states of mind.

The hope didn't return until those faded black and white images of a fetus came into view. Finally, a son to show for the Styles family business. Harry still remembered that partially flowy cream sweater with stone washed jeans that bidded a flourish of appreciation in him. The way the sweater flowed over your bump but still hugged it enough to show how protruding it was lit his eyes like a child in toy store. Lincoln's birth was the best thing in the world for you both. Adapting your attention to your new addition wasn't at all a difficult. Glady devoting time to bottle feedings, late night diaper changes and playdates. Teddy bears filled his bed and toys filled his bedroom. You and Harry had developed your own relationship with Lincoln with an unspoken agreement. This was the heart of your marriage. A piece that brought it together.

But it didn't. Once the diaper days were long gone, and those preschool and kindergarten dreams fizzled, you were left with a newly independent pre-teen. One who finally saw all the cracks of his seemingly perfect life and was now on a countdown to escape. This parental involvement wasn't anything out of the ordinary. Just two parents of any only child that put them more on the overprotect radar. Didn't matter though; like all the other parents in the world who were well informed of the risks that came with children were not to been given an excuse for such lackluster discernment on their kids. But yours and Harry's was different of course, like always. Working hard to convince Lincoln that his cocoon was nothing mere than a close relationship with his parents and this was the requirement.

But....who were you kidding. The kid saw like glass on how proprietorial his parents were. The reasoning became clearer to him, seeing other kids and their parents affectionate relationship. You knew he would. One incident of Lincoln meeting Susan Blakely. The coffee color of her long hair that hung so effortlessly to her waist with perfect curls that bounced at the end. Lincoln had been invited to her party, seeing him as eye candy was a mutual feeling they shared. The quiff Lincoln styled his brown curls into, the leather jacket that studded sophistication into it and his dark blue jeans, not too snug or loose, but hung just right above his black sneakers.

"You look so handsome!" Lincoln, trollied down the stairs; eyes abstracted on the front door. Harry's car was nowhere to be found in the driveway or garage, the only way Lincoln could make such a hasty escape with a settled acceptance from you. Shortly after Lincoln made a route from the house to Sam's car- a friend who had a license compared to the rest of the group- Harry's honda pulled into the garage. The house, dim, throttled like the air had been sucked dry. The slow but base footsteps followed the shadow of light into the kitchen. It made you stomach burn into this knot, poking at it like jilted feeling of not being able to do something that had to be done. It wasn't until Harry spotted your figure standing over the sink, washing dishes, daring not to make eye contact afraid of the first words being garotted out.

"Where's Lincoln?" You gave a side eye back glance, not fully looking into those stiff green eyes, but only his shadow that stood peering only over the stovetop. "At a party," It was like a gun being held to your head, forcing you to spill a dirty secret of a close friend. "But, I told him it was okay. I knew Susan's mother so, it's fine." You bit your tongue, punishing it for speaking out of term. "Susan? A girl?" You finally faced Harry, dropping the cup into the sink. "You know how much trouble they could get into! Yn how could-" Harry jolted himself to the coat rack, grabbing the keys from his coat pocket. "Harry, stop! It's not a big deal! Isn't my word enough? You'll embarrass him." Harry only glanced at you before buttoning up his long black trench coat. "You know we both have to verify things Yn." He coldly stated before zipping out the door and into his car.

The waiting was the worst part. Fingers tapping against the arm of the chair, drumming up its own melody of anticipation. The same one you had sitting in the bathroom that one night to confirm what you had already knew from Dr. Katz. Those two lines appeared like magic across the test, still shuddering this surrealness into you like it was the first time. Like the ultrasound had somehow made a mistake in diagnosing your pregnancy. The booming of the front door opening rocked your attention towards a furious Lincoln and a concerned Harry. Lincoln glanced at you as if to say: "Why did you tell him? Did he really have to know?" Before storming up to his room, cold shouldering Harry on his way up.

"I offered to take him to laser tag tomorrow afternoon." You shook your head, "He's a teenager Harry, he wants to spend time with his friends." "I'm his friend? Right?" Harry looked for any signs of agreement on your face. But your eyes, were just tired. Tired of the same broken record that played out not to poles apart from this. "What happened?" A deep sigh finally eradicated from your mouth, blowing out the wind from your lungs like you were too scared to even ponder the outcome of what you knew to be an explosive event.

Lincoln sat bitterly on his bed. His used up sneakers curled up on the floor by his closet, his leather jacket shot over to the back of his swivel chair and his glare still edging throughout the room. His father; downstairs telling his mother a stagnant version of the event, curveting over the little details that complete the puzzle.

Lincoln, making his move over to Susan, laughing, chatting and then kissing. Kissing her with passion, not daring to take a step in the wrong direction, but just savoring the touch of her strawberry lips. Pulling away, he spots this thick black coat walking towards him, mix matched with all the other shambles of kids circling around the party making this figure stand amongst them. Harry didn't yell, or scream or riot. But he simply looped his arm around his son's and dragged him out without a word. The flashes of faces staring out at this eccentric scene became spotted. Heat filled Lincoln's face: part with infused fury and the other with disregarded shame. The car ride was rigid; Lincoln faced the window, not speaking what ran so rapidly through his mind. Swallowing back any grimaces that could trace any more rebellion to him. Instead, Harry suggested laser tag which sent Lincoln shooting from the car and into the house.

He noticed how dry his lips were, recalling those last moments of innocence. The 16 year old would now realize just how twisted things would get and how this was just a mere act. An act of rebellion from his father as well. The wheels turned like car tires, rolling through a freshly paved road in the country in Lincoln's brain. His suspicions of his parents were just much more than to be brushed off with basic teenage angst....it was more sinister than that. The picket fence became discolored, chipped, cracked, broken....the lie couldn't be covered. Harry's fatherly concern was just a big six wheel game. His reputation, was a part of him. And with it, his lies. They're precious angel was just a fine line between the couple. A broken chance of coming together. They needed Lincoln. He understood. They needed him way more than he did. He was their last hope, without him, the marriage would just be a slash to the Styles clan, and hickey on your neck for MerylStone to be blasted long and wide for everyone to realize, you and Harry were just not the match made in heaven you both thought yourselves to be.

"I thought he'd be at work," Lincoln said aloud to himself, "I thought he was working late. He always does when it's Friday."

Harry and Lincoln wrestled on it the most, but you had this understanding. This knowledge of the whole view. You and Pa, working against his efforts to mold this housewife out of you and now Harry and Lincoln. Pacifying him, molding him to full dependence on you both. Making everything into a fool's paradise. Pa's only good reasoning was ignorance, but this was a well calculated, instituted masterplan. Lincoln became another life to you. He possessed this barrier between you and Harry; working together to keep the one lifeline of this family incased to his parents. Such a selfish plan was sure to face a humiliating defeat, but you didn't care. Neither did Harry. Plastering the name of good parents onto his reputation when he couldn't even get his own son to stay.

Willing to offer his son's life for his own was pure repulsive. You had realized that, the night Lincoln turned 18; a stabbing coolness in your back and sharp pinging kick told you this was it. Things were going to end and fast. And now, he's gone. Just like that into the night. No goodbye, no I love you....nothing. Because in the end, that's what you gave him. You and Harry....nothing. Those nights, hearing your panging yelling and Harry's screeching temper, seeped Lincoln under the dining room table. You knew the boy was smart, you knew he was fighting to survive, you knew he wasn't just this ungrateful brat who whisked himself away over some petty curfew hustle.

No. You and Harry were the problem. The toxic wasteland that threatened to rip the sanity from the only sane person in this house. Lincoln did what you and your husband could never....walk away.

He knew the truth, he didn't cheat or cover it. But simply left it out in the open and accepted it for what it was worth.

You grabbed the family portrait, looking it dreadfully in the eyes before slamming it down to the ground while a scream left your voice. Harry arrived back to see the broken glass and the disgruntled look on your face. Tears finally broke free, slashing their way down your cheeks. "You did this!" You yelled, practically spitting the words into Harry's face. "You drove our baby away! He was fine, he was happy! But you couldn't stand to let go! Now he's gone and you don't even care! You didn't cry or feel sorry, nothing! You're never letting go!" Catching your breath, "You know I didn't want this! I know what you think everyday going to work everyday! You know what I think and wonder!"

"Yes I do!" Slamming his suitcase down the the floor, papers scattering everywhere in the living room. "I am sad yn! I know why he left, I know all of that! He's my son! I love him! And you know that!"

"You couldn't stop being selfish! I wanted to let go! I wanted to take the parental controls off his phone, I wanted to let him drive at 16, I wanted to let him go to his friend's party! But you said no! Because he's your little safety net! You couldn't think about him as a person! For once, you couldn't see him as more than a boy! Now he's gone and I can't see him! He ran away from us! HE LEFT US BECAUSE OF OUR PROBLEMS!" Grabbing the stone washed vase, smashing to pieces on the floor. "I want my baby back!"

Harry silently grabbed your arm silently. Tears, falling like rain drops on a car window, wettend Harry's face. He went to the wet bar, poured himself a scotch before speaking. "I'm sorry." His voice, so quiet and collected, yet so broken and shattered. You didn't waste time running into Harry's arms, sobbing quietly into each other. He took your chin to his eyes. "We'll fix this. We have to try, no more beating around the bush if this is gonna be fixed." You nodded. "Of course."

"And maybe one day....he'll come back....and we'll be better." You added. You could feel Harry smiling into your scalp, kissing it gently.

And you prayed you and Harry could. And that you could be that happy little family in a white house with a picket fence.

This took me a week to work on!!! Hope you liked it!!!

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gumballavocadoharry · 2 years

Text

Rock bottom:

*Warning Harry acts like a jerk here. Mentions and actions of hitting and body image*

The relationship was rocky. And both sides were on edge. As it was feared, both sides were preparing for war. The chillness, piercing icy freeze within the communication. You and Harry had been spreading apart; you weren't as hopeful as you both once where. Feelings of inadequacy became more preeminent. On one half you hated how you and Harry grew apart but on the other end, you resented it. And Harry as well. At least you started too.

What went wrong? You wondered religiously. You always felt as if you had done something wrong to Harry and he never hesitated to let you know that. But how could he? You thought. He always hurts me and yet somehow he's on this pedestal! That still didn't answer your question as to what went wrong in your relationship.

He was more critical you would say. You were more uncooperative. That didn't solve anything. Instead you sucked it all in and put on a happy face for Harry's charity dinner tonight with some friends and coworkers. You practiced that face for hours until you finally got it to how it almost used to be during the two months when you first started dating Harry.

Everything was so perfect then. Now it's all in shambles and your only hope is to cling to the bigger parts.

"Yn come on we have to go!" Harry yelled from the bottom of the stairs kinda abruptly. "I'm coming, just wait!" You said in a sharp like response to match his. You came downstairs after 3 minutes from puffing on some of your expensive german perfume. The shimmery dark electric blue dress hugged your curves decently. Even Harry gave a little smirk seeing you walk downstairs, swaying side to side as your hair followed it's pattern. Oh yeah, fighting or not he couldn't deny your beauty. The same could be said for him.

"Ready?" He asked barley looking up from his watch. "Mm hmm." Harry ushered you to the car, and once you were both inside the atmosphere didn't change. The ride there was so quiet that you could hear each others exasperated breaths. Once at the charity event, you were so intrigued with the decoration of the inside. It was beautiful. The thick white roman pillars along with the chestnut colored fountain caught your eye and settled as your favorites. "Come on yn." Harry grabbed your arm a little rough than to your liking as he felt you were getting in his and everyone's way.

What was the big deal? You couldn't even enjoy yourself because he was so intent on being stuffy and pleasing to all his 'associates' that he forgot his proper etiquette with you, his escort and supposed supporter. But of course he didn't even bother to show that well-deserved appreciation. You were escorted to a table with people dressed very fancy due to the place of business.

Before you could introduce yourself, Harry did it for you almost as if he was rushing or ashamed that you would do something foolish. Since when did he care? After being shabbily treated, you should be the one ASHAMED of him! But none of that mattered now, you just put on that rehearsed grin and took your seat.

It was boring hearing the people that seemed to be above you talk about their company and jobs. "So how have you been yn?" One of the men asked you. "Oh fine, just trying to get in all the shopping before thanksgiving." You joked which seemed to arouse amusement from the table. However that didn't last long....one of the guys had to open his mouth.

"Don't forget to buy some fancy panties, you know how haz likes his woman." All the guys let out this haughty laugh like it was a comedy show. And maybe it was....you were the opening act. But what disgusted you the most was how Harry, your so called boyfriend didn't even defend you. He just laughed with those pig heads like nothing was wrong. But you were beyond insulted. To add insult to injury, another guy chimed in about how Harry just "adores" Abby. And that idiot laughed like he was drunk or living for the day.

"You're telling me, it took 15 minutes for yn to wax her eyebrows and upper lip."

A knife just pierced your heart, at least it felt that way. Fury filled your body as you wanted to splash that water in Harry's face for what he said. No you wanted to smash your whole glass in his face. That was a sensitive topic for you and if he actually loved you in the way he should, then he would know better then to make such a mockery of your body like that.

Harry looked at you as if to say that it would be a MISTAKE on your end to overreact. You gave Harry a cold look and hurt look before standing up and taking a stand.

"Look, I'm gonna go now, but you all enjoy your meal and evening. I hope your new team member makes you feel just as comfortable as he made me feel tonight. It's obvious that you shouldn't count on him for confidential matters seeing the respect he lacks for it. Goodnight."

You grabbed your purse and walked out of the restaurant. Suddenly the laughter was non-existent, anger and tension had replaced it instead. But that's what they get for using you as a clown like that.

You didn't bother looking back to see the guests reactions.

You had grabbed a taxi and made it home while you ordered pizza in the car. You felt that by the time you got home, you wouldn't have to wait for dinner. You ate your pizza and fancied a glass of wine while watching a movie to take your mind off of the hurt Harry had despicably caused you. After your bittersweet dinner, you went upstairs getting ready for bed. You expected Harry to not be home till later if at all. But he came home straight after his charity and a couple drinks, as you could smell it on his breath.

"YN! What the heck is your problem?! Walking out in the middle of dinner like that! You are gonna apologize to me and you're gonna apologize to everyone at that dinner!" "Like hell I will! You humiliated me and on top of that allowed those other guys to do the same! So yeah I walked out, I wasn't gonna let some donkeys at a table who probably go to strip clubs all the time as I could tell by their jokes, sit there and speak about me like I'm a dirty hooker or something!"

"So you threw a tantrum?" You scoffed. "You're not getting it. Stop putting words in my mouth, you'll just look more stupid than you already are." Rolled eyes followed after the outburst. Harry undid his tie. "You know sometimes I wonder if you're with me or against me." You turned around this time about to bubble over.

"I have supported you this entire time even when you've treated me like utter crap! So don't you dare say I didn't support you or tolerate any of your bull crap!" "I make money and support all your needs yn! But you can't sit and just at least take one more dinner?" You looked stunned. You were absolutely repulsive to the fact that Harry actually didn't care as to whether or not you were disrespected. As his girlfriend you had every right to walk away and he's saying that you that you should've stayed?!

"How dare you! Come in this house and make such a revolting comment like that! If I wanted to leave because you're pig headed team were acting like jerks, well then I dang well have the right to do so! Congratulations you're now one of them."

"Lemme guess? The upper lip comment?" You turned around sharply. "I told you that in confidence and you turn around and slap me in the face with my own trust? You bastard!"

"That was the least of your problems yn. And you know that."

You turned around to see a smug Harry looking at you in the same way he looked at you in the restaurant. He looked down on you like you were small. He made you feel small. "Do you know how hurtful that was?" You said with a lump in your throat. You spoke in a snivel way. Tears threatening to spill at any moment but held them back as to not show Harry you're weakness.

"You're gonna lose control again?" He said so arrogantly and condescending

No this is losing control.

You sent a hard, sharp, ricocheting slap to Harry's face So hard that it made your hand sting with satisfaction, shock and guilt all at once. You couldn't believe it. You just hit the person you loved. A Harry who was in shock and shame was still hunched over holding his left cheek with his matching hand. He slowly looked up at you, tears now fully waterfalling down your face.

"I'm so sorry...I just lost my temper I-"

"Get out. Right now." He said painfully. You didn't even argue, you just left You packed your suitcase as Harry ran downstairs. You packed up everything you owned and walked out that front door. And that was it. Closing that door meant leaving Harry forever. The last glimpse of him was him laying on the couch, eyes more focused on the Tv than on your goodbye. But that was the last time. Pulling out of the driveway you realized, you and Harry both hit rock bottom.

#harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles and yn #rock bottom #bad boyfriend #dysfunctional

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