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wanderlust-in-my-soul · 9 months

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Do you know any thai/korean/all BL dramas with sad ending?

Thai/Korean/All BL Dramas With Sad Endings

Okay, let me get started. BL in general is not really created for sad endings. It is a phantasy land where all kinds of dreams come true. And originally it adressed a specific audience. So, some of the dramas I am listing here are more queer media in general and not specifically BL. And some of those dramas have an open ending, that does not mean it is not a sad ending, and some might have a beautiful ending, which was kind of sad. There are so many ways of reading those endings.

Two of the shows I haven’t watched yet, but I know that those have sad endings… And please be aware, there will be spoilers after the read-more-dash.

Let’s get started!

Egoist – based on a true story, this Japanese movie is heartbreaking. It is a beautiful story about the love between two people and how they manage their life together until, yeah well, until fate f*ed everything up.

Eien No Kinou (Eternal Yesterday) – another Japanese title. From the start of this series, you just know that this won’t end well. It just can’t. And at the same time, it is so beautiful, you can’t stop watching it. So good!

History 3: Make Our Days Count – I guess people would come after me, if I don’t mention this Taiwanese bl. Yeah…I wasn’t that impacted by the ending, but most of the people who watched it were devastated. I understand why, so have fun 😊

Kissable lips – the first Korean one. This series wasn’t my cup of tea, but that wasn’t the question. For a sad ending, this is your series!

The Miracle of Teddy Bear – this is such a complex thai series as is the ending. Many didn’t watch it because of some weird elements of the series and the episodes are long, but BUT it is so worth a watch! The ending? I kind of liked it? But it was very bittersweet and considering the use of the Little Prince source it is really good...but sad... I am confused... still...

Dark Blue And Moonlight – a Taiwanese series…I wouldn’t recommend it. I can’t really remember the ending… I know it was bad sad.

180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us – a thai masterpiece. I love this one so much and I analysed the sh*t out of it! It is so good and I was devastated in the end! Such a great storytelling and cinematography and story and the characters...perfection.

Dear Doctor, I’m Coming For Soul – this is a thai series, which got very little attention when it aired (I don’t know why, I really liked it) and the ending was just a sobbing fest for me. I mean I liked it and it was just logical, but I was very sad!

Don’t Say No – also a thai series and I don’t focus on the main couple… I couldn’t care less about them… but the side couple! Oh the heartbreak I felt and the betrayel!

He She It – To this day I still ask myself what I have watched here. All I know is, it is confusing and kind of sad…the whole story, not just the ending.

The Best Story – it is Thai and it is YinWar… so it is good. Nevertheless, it has a very bittersweet ending, and I didn’t feel good after finishing this miniseries. I was very sad!

Once Again – one of my favorite series of 2022. This Korean series deals with a lot of trauma. It has some supernatural element and is really really good! And I was sobbing for the whole f*cking last episode!

When The Waves Rise – in this Korean short film, it is all about the feeling you get from it. It left me devastated. I was really not doing well after finishing it. It touched a part of my soul and it left a sore spot there.

Your Name Engraved Herein – I haven’t seen this one, because I know it will break my heart and I am still not ready for that. It is a Taiwanese movie and I know that I will love it, but I also know that I will cry my little eyes out.

Grey Rainbow – haven‘t seen this one either. This is a Thai miniseries and it is said to have a very sad ending.

The Untamed – the king, the queen, the emperor of sadness. I love this 50 episodes long Chinese masterpiece of a series to death! It doesn’t have a bad ending imo and it is quite open, but the amount of tears I shed during watching this fantasy epos was not funny anymore. I was ugly crying for like 15 minutes straight at one point. And I felt empty after I finished it. I miss it so much! I wish I could watch it again with all the emotions I had during my first watch!

But yeah…this is my little list 😊

If anyone wants to add more dramas, please feel free to do so 💜

Anon, I hope I could help a little bit and this list is useful 🌼

#anon ask #josi answers #bl with sad endings #egoist #eien no kinou #history 3: modc #kissable lips #180 degree longitude passes through us #the miracle of teddy bear #once again #your name engraved herein #the untamed #thai bl #taiwanese bl #japanese bl #korean bl #bl drama #bl series #listing things

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akkrosu · 9 months

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Thai BL Favorites List

Thank you for tagging me, @ellaspore! It has taken me a while to finish this, but if you’re making me choose this harshly between my favorite shows and characters, my choices have to be well thought-through. Which doesn’t mean I’m capable of narrowing down pretty much anything to just one per category, so expect me to cheat a lot here.

Favorite Thai BL: I have too many Thai BLs I love, and I don’t really have one favorite that tops them all, so let me use this chance instead to rectify the fact that I forgot about one important show when I was asked about my nine favorite shows last time: KinnPorsche. My beloved.

Current Obsession: I’ll go with Be My Favorite here. But I have to say, Laws of Attraction is climbing the ranks fast and, after only two episodes, I have just about reached the same level of obsession I have for Be My Favorite. I’m still on the fence about Hidden Agenda, but this could easily become a favorite too.

Favorite Pairing: Oh no. Don’t make me choose. This might honestly be the hardest question on this list. One of the first couples I thought of was Akk and Ayan from The Eclipse, but my heart is also screaming at me to say Kluen and Daonuea from Star in my Mind, or Tinn and Gun from My School President. I can’t possibly narrow this down even more, three is already too few. Can I skip this question? 👀

Most Underrated Actor: I don’t know if he’s underrated in general or I just personally underestimated him for the longest time, but Gawin is doing really, really well in Be My Favorite (I also substantially underestimated his singing abilities). Other than that, I’m really impressed by how phenomenally Film is portraying Charn in Laws of Attraction.

Favorite Character: No. I refuse to answer this. You can’t make me. Everything in me is hurting at the idea of choosing one. Let me just dodge this question by listing like the first dozen people that come to mind (my brain works in mysterious and non-comprehensible ways, just don’t question it): Gun (My School President), Akk (The Eclipse), Kluen (Star in my Mind), Jeng (Step by Step), Yai (Big Dragon), Mark (Love Mechanics), literally everyone from Moonlight Chicken, but especially Alan (he is the most understandable and human and complex antagonist I’ve ever seen, and it makes me insane). I said what I said.

Favorite Side Character: Honestly, right now I’ll give this to Tien from La Pluie. There are so many other incredible side characters that deserve to be here, but I’m particularly in love with him right now.

Favorite Scene in a BL: I have a particular obsession with this one scene in ep 10 of Never Let Me Go where Palm returns to Nueng and they reunite in that abandoned building and promise each other eternal love and support. It’s the look on Nueng’s face when he sees Palm that gets me—all that longing and hope and unadulterated happiness and relief of getting to see him again. Then there’s also this one scene in ep 8 of The Eclipse where Ayan is the most patient and loving person ever in trying to coax out Akk’s feelings, which leads to one of the softest kisses in BL history (in my personal opinion). Oh, and I also frequently rewatch the one in Not Me where White runs away from Sean after Sean finds out about the twin thing, and Sean says all hurt and in love and confused, “I don’t even know what your name is”, and White tells him, and Sean immediately repeats it and hugs him like he finally has the right to his real identity, to the real him, and he’s in awe. And the soundtrack, ugh, it’s so good.

Favorite Line in a BL: Cake saying “Nobody’s hurt just because we love each other” to See-Eiw in My Only 12%. That line struck me so hard. Oh, and Akk and Ayan telling each other they are allowed to be weak with each other in The Eclipse. The way they promised each other weakness wasn’t something to be ashamed of, ugh. And then there’s the end credits of 180° Longitude Passes Through Us saying (amongst other emotionally devastating things), “To you who call yourself a parent: you can only give birth to them, but you don’t own them.” The way I wept when I read that. This show tried to destroy me, and it succeeded.

Most Anticipated BL (& Why): Only Friends, which will come as no surprise to anyone who has talked to me about it. I trust P’Jojo with all my heart and I trust these actors to create the queerest, messiest story in GMMTV history or even Thai BL history.

Healthiest relationship in a BL: Oh, I’m also really tempted to say Tinn and Gun from My School President. And for a bit of an underrated relationship—Fuse and Ana from Future.

Most Toxic Relationship in a BL: Korn and Knock in Together With Me. Mostly because of how Knock treated Korn like he was disposable and only for him to play with.

Guilty Pleasure Series: I will not answer with Star in my Mind like you did, @ellaspore, simply because I do not feel even remotely guilty for the love I have for this series. I’ll go with Big Dragon, instead.

So that was a wild ride full of conflicting feelings. Thanks for inviting me to try this! Not really sure who to tag here, but I’ll just go ahead and invite @recentadultburnout or anyone else who feels like it! And just for funsies, let me also ask @respectthepetty since I want to know if my theory on what they would pick for some of these, like favorite side character, are correct.

#bl tag game

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chelseacatgirl · 11 months

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*SPOILER ALERT*

I just came to announce that I finally got all 11 Endings in Brok the InvestiGator, I got the following endings in order, starting with the 10 non-canon endings:

Drumer *Second favorite ending even though it was bittersweet*

Till the End of Time *The ending where poor Ott died, it really made me cry*

Fight Together

Broken Detective *A bad ending*

Rupture

Fall *WORST ENDING EVER*

Slumer *BEST ENDING EVER*

Diary *A very emotional ending*

Out of Loop *Least favorite ending*

Cynical *A hilarious joke ending featuring characters from a previous COWCATGames title Demetrios - The BIG Cynical Adventure*

I got the Canonical Ending last, the ending itself is very bittersweet and tragic, started with Brok and Graff's heated argument about the former's past actions that he can't remember and the latter's future being shattered, then afterwards, after Brok got a farewell letter from Graff that left him devastated, he then solved clues from Shay's envelope before going to her garage and discovered her time machine and uses it to go back 5 years ago, a week before the fire in an attempt to prevent Lia's death that will also fix Brok's past mistakes, he be doing it for his stepson Graff because he loves him. This I hope would come true.

---

Inspired by that ending and to celebrate this occasion, I drew this fanart about how Brok misses Graff and hoped how the altered timeline be like if he did prevent Lia's death. Oh, this is also inspired by the song "Somewhere Out There" from one of the Don Bluth films I grew up with "An American Tail".

Meanwhile, I could imagine Brok and Graff singing this song:

Brok:

Somewhere out there beneath the pale moonlight

Someone's thinking of me and loving me tonight

Graff:

Somewhere out there someone's saying a prayer

That we'll find one another in that big somewhere out there

And even though I know how very far apart we are

It helps to think we might be wishin' on the same bright star

Brok:

And when the night wind starts to sing a lonesome lullaby

It helps to think we're sleeping underneath the same big sky

Brok and Graff:

Somewhere out there, if love can see us through

Then we'll be together somewhere out there

Out where dreams come true

Oh, here's the song itself from An American Tail:

https://youtu.be/2jzlSeFLr7A

https://youtu.be/1rHZTOpqv9c

Here's the Ending Credits version:

https://youtu.be/5jl8mzCaCr0

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Meanwhile it is my first time drawing Lia.

Still, I'm looking forward to what the future of Brok the InvestiGator has to offer, while I hope one day, my fanart would appear in the game itself. Thanks COWCATGames for this really good game.😺

Drawn on ibisPaint X on my Samsung Galaxy Tab A.

Brok, Graff, and Lia (c) @cowcatgames

#Brok the InvestiGator #Brok #Graff #Lia

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septembersghost · 1 year

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Made me think how I think shows had to use older or available songs because of licensing issues. Probably why investment companies have been buying UP catalogues. In a way it drew in and retained an audience. New (& old) generations (re)discover them via media via TV (like singing or performances shows like American Idol or Glee), movies, plays & shows. Emotions are tied to moments- for some it becomes a classic. Longevity. Ex. Mariah Carey’s Christmas song, Holidays songs (4th of July), etc.

i was reading the other day about when the beach boys' masters were lost and how devastating it was to brian wilson, and of course famously frank sinatra founded reprise on the principle that artists would have full creative freedom and ownership of their masters and publishing rights, which he did not have at capitol, and he recut a bunch of his biggest songs (i don't consider them re-recordings in the same sense as what taylor is doing because his intent wasn't to replicate and thus replace them, which he couldn't do anyway considering the vocal changes he'd experienced, having to use entirely different session musicians and arrangements, etc, but he did do that to gain back some control). it reminds me of how paul was very upset when mj acquired the beatles' masters too. what's astounding to me is how many massive artists ARE choosing to sell off their work to these investment companies for massive sums. i just could never do that, i understand why losing her albums gutted taylor and why she's been so strident in talking about the connection between an artist and their art, and retaining your own work. it's certainly lucrative for those firms, though, and i'm sure we'll see many licensing deals come from those sales.

licensing songs out for films/shows/commercials can for sure sure bring a new/wider audience to the music! (it's funny because my mom asked me the other day if i thought people knew that my way, currently in a commercial, was originally a sinatra track, but the irony is frank hated that song. another notable one right now is the car commercial using everywhere by fleetwood mac, they'd been using it before christine passed away, but every time i hear it now, it squeezes my heart a bit.)

not having licenses also presents a headache - the first season of supernatural has all the wrong music on streaming because back in 2005, the wb didn't secure the rights for their classic rock in perpetuity, and it's a detriment to that season of the show. moonlighting doesn't exist anywhere on streaming because that show was so music-heavy and they didn't secure the rights in the 80s either, so whole deals with many, many artists would have to be done to get it on a platform. this has happened with a number of shows (dawson's creek didn't even have its own theme song for ages, until they worked out a deal with paula cole a year or so ago, and i believe she re-recorded it, idk if they've ever restored any of the other music). the streaming landscape has caused networks/producers to be more vigilant about this and make sure they retain the usage rights for their series ahead of time.

"Emotions are tied to moments- for some it becomes a classic." very, very true! like i've said, there are scientific studies on this! music so directly connects to our emotions and core memories.

#anonymous #letterbox #typing this as the brasil 66 cover of fool on the hill pops up on shuffle feels like such a vibe

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akajustmerry · 2 years

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There is a show with a ship that even after 5 years fans are totally conviced is going to happen, and im like good for you but even if it dos happen, i think they totally overvalue the competency of the creators/writers. So i wondered what would actually be a good written and developed "slow burn" relationship?

Without really knowing the show/ship you're talking about its hard for me to refute the example in your head. So, I'll just give examples of shows/ships that I personally think did/do the slow burn really well.

Belle and Freddie (the hour, tv) - this theeeeee slow burn of all slow burns. It's excruciatingly good to the point that you hang on every word, look, touch. They're unparalleled, unmatched and indescribable. You have to experience it.

Harley and Poisin Ivy (Harley Quinn Animated Series) - these 2 kill me, their slow burn is so well thought out and considerate and lovely and devastating and tied into their individual character development. Their romance is one of THE best wlw romances on TV right now.

Cairo Time (2009, film) - Patricia Clarkson and Alexander Siddig emotionally scarred me with this movie and I thanked them for it. Their desire for one another is SO PALPABLE but their individual situations complicate it so painfully well. I cried through the last 5 minutes of this film purely because the longing of it was SO MUCH. usually it's hard to do slow burn in film, but not there.

JANE AND RAFAEL (Jane the Virgin, tv) - slow burn ROYALTY, these 2. their slow inevitable soul matery (is that a word idk who cares) is BAKED into the premise and every character in the show. Nothing did slow burn like Jane the Virgin

Emily and Sue (Dickinson, tv) - again it's all about the CIRCUMSTANCES and how they complicate the character's longing and God damn it Dickinson made me feel like I was on fire watching these 2.

Henry/Eliza, Selfie (tv) - alas it was cancelled so we never actually get to see the flame, you know? But the love is there brewing beneath the friendship and mutual respect, tied intricately to everything in the show.

Max and Fran (the nanny, tv) - King and Queen of the slow burn sitcom romance. They're icons in the genre honestly, and yeah it's a bit dated in places but they're the BLUEPRINT.

Moonlight (2016) - I don't rlly wanna be reductive and reduce Moonlight to a slow burn because it's far more beautifully complex than that, but the slow burn romance weaved throughout Chiron's story is a holy one.

Basically, for a slow burn to work imo, it has to be baked into the character's individual development and the circumstances of the story. Like the audience needs to understand on every level why it's not the right time until it is. If they don't, then it's not a slow burn, it's an after thought (*coughs* ang and katara *coughs*).

#Anon

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twstheadcanons · 3 years

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Self-Indulgent TWST Geography

A long post of generalised geography headcanons for the world of TWST complete with continents for my own personal needs. The post divides locations by Continent.

Anyway why is there a homeland whose name is just the definition of a desert.

Continents (and ocean)

Errant - a western continent in Twisted Wonderland. Mzunguko - the second largest continent in Twisted Wonderland. Yalmae - the largest continent in Twisted Wonderland. Abíní - a continent West of Errant. Tridente Ocean - the largest ocean in Twisted Wonderland.

Errant

Rose Kingdom – a country in the western region of Errant. It isn’t a particularly large country, and traveling from it to its neighbouring countries is possible via buses or car. Crownsshire – a county in Rose Kingdom Crowns – the capital of Crownsshire. It is the town Riddle, Trey, and Che’nya live in.

Land of Pyroxene – a large country in Errant. Known for its cold, snowy winters and history with legends pertaining to five of the Great Seven. Waldburg – province Vil’s family is from. Largely influenced by another country within Errant. Argent – a province in Land of Pyroxene. Verre – a city in Argent. Trein and Cater are from here. Félicité Cosmetics originates here. Miroir – a province in Land of Pyroxene. Has a large outlet mall popular with fashion-lovers and shopaholics. The Ténèbres brand originates here. Enchantée – a town in Miroir. Jack and Vargas live here, whilst Vil and his father move here. Scharlachrot - a province in Land of Pyroxene. Epel’s Village of Harvest resides here, and is famous for its widespread organic produce.

Isle of Lamentation – island country, its popularised global name is a translation from the isle’s original Nísos Thrínos. It has robust technological advancements and is the homeland of the popular idol group On the Edge, known for having concerts with elaborate imagery and visual effects from some of the best technicians available. Due to legends of the God of the Underworld, dogs are extremely popular on the Isle of Lamentation. Kapnós – capital of the Isle of Lamentations where the Shroud family resides.

Valley of Thorns – an isolated country small in population, largely consisting of a large mountain range. The closer one is to where its Queen resides, the colder it gets. It is said the Valley of Thorns can go weeks with nothing but moonlight. Geimhreadh - technically the name of the forest near the Valley of Thorns’ mountain range, where the Queen makes her home at its peak. Its name spread to the residential areas nearby.

Mzunguko

Afterglow Savannah – country in Mzunguko, ‘Afterglow’ acts as a loose translation of its name, Baadaye. It lies in eastern Mzunguko. Famous for its royal guards and leading role in nature conservation. Kiburi – a county in the east of the Afterglow Savannah. Mwamba – capital of Kiburi, where the Kingscholar royal family lives. Maisha – a county in Afterglow Savannah, with its capital sharing the same name. Jioni – a town in Maisha. Ruggie and his family live here.

Manyoya – county in Afterglow Savannah. Well-known for a famously expansive library and a high population of avian beastfolk. Uzuri – a city in Manyoya, where Rook is from.

Yalmae

Land of Hot Sands – one of many countries in the continent of Yalmae,. Within the country, it’s referred to as Aldif’. Rich with its magical history and origins of astrology, Aldif’ nurtures Magicians skilled in divination. It has a vivid musical scene as well. Misbah - governate of Aldif’. Yatamanaa – capital of Misbah, a largely lucrative city within Aldif’ and city where Kalim and Jamil live.

Abíní

Port of Jubilee - a diverse nation where Sam’s family lives, owning an extensive emporium. A vast amount of cultures reside in Port of Jubilee, many sharing common ancestors and languages with one another. Nanm - province in Port of Jubilee. Sekrè - port town in Nanm that Sam is from. His family owns an impressive emporium popular with locals.

Tridente Ocean

Coral Sea - a sea within the Tridente Ocean. Many of coastlines range across countries within Errant, Mzunguko, and Yalmae. Beneath its waters lies a kingdom sharing the same name as the sea.

Name Trivia

Continents (and ocean)

Errant - the continent of Errant has the homelands based off movies such as Alice in Wonderland, Snow White, Hercules, Sleeping Beauty, Beauty and the Beast, and Cinderella. The name stems from certain scenes in the movie marking a particular moment the protagonists feel out of place or stray off the expected course.

Alice in Wonderland: Alice’s misadventures begin when she makes the decision to follow a strange rabbit, straying off the course of simply reading and studying as her sister wished, where the curious and at worst annoying strange creatures and nature of Wonderland take a turn when she meets the Caterpillar, who questions Alice’s place and identity, and the stress of her situation and being unable to return home overwhelms her emotionally.

Snow White - the horrific moment Snow White, in a state of panic, rushes through a dark forest, where her fears envision hidden horrors within the trees and wildlife.

Hercules - after refusing to listen to Phil’s warnings about Megara being in cahoots with Hades, Hercules faces the devastating fact that Megara (reluctantly) deceived him, and loses his superhuman strength and faith in himself.

Sleeping Beauty - shortly after meeting a man she falls for, Aurora becomes devastated and resigned to her fate being betrothed to a complete stranger out of responsibility for her future and country.

Beauty and the Beast - Maurice’s ventures through a mysterious forest consequently leads him to the Beast’s castle in a desperate attempt to escape cold, only to be imprisoned by the Beast for intruding, ultimately putting the story into motion. After Belle makes a deal to swap places with her father and free him, Belle starts off terrified and in over her head despite saving her father’s life.

Cinderella - after the mice’s hard work creating a fitting ballgown for Cinderella to enjoy the ball, her stepsisters ruin the dress and Cinderella’s chances of leaving her oppressive family’s home. Her distress and tears lead her to meeting the Fairy Godmother.

Mzunguko - “circle” in Swahili, the language prominent in Lion King’s names, lyrics, and Rafiki’s dialogue, as well as the official language of Kenya, where much of the movie’s settings take inspiration and blatantly feature. Taken from the iconic “Circle of Life” song.

Tridente Ocean - “trident” in Italian. Yes, I hear you. The author is from Denmark. The statue is in Denmark. The movie references the statue in Denmark. However the surname Ashengrotto and Azul’s mother running a ristorante screams Italian and there’s the overall edgy mafia vibe the Octatrio has going on. I win this one.

Yalmae - “shine” in Arabic (يلمع). I wanted a name that illustrated the vibrant, lively diversity of the continent’s many countries, cultures, flora, and fauna. Something akin to a name that inspires a welcoming feeling.

Abíní - “morning” in Navajo. I wanted a name that inspires energy and enthusiasm, like a sunrise in summer.

Homelands

Rose Kingdom

Crownsshire - just the most painfully English name I could think of. “Crown” refers to, naturally, the crown of the Queen of Hearts. Also decided to make the Rose Kingdom its own, smaller, more limited country, instead of allowing its apparent monarchy to leech off 20+ different countries Crowns - do you have any idea how genuinely shocking it is we don’t actually have a town here named this.

Afterglow Savannah

Baadaye - “afterglow” in Swahili. The official and native name of the Afterglow Savannah. Interestingly, my findings found translations of it meaning “future” as well, which I consider fitting. Kiburi - “pride” in Swahili, can refer to a ‘pride of lions’ or confidence (often overconfidence). Mwamba - “rock” in Swahili, alluding to the Pride Rock that Mufasa’s pride resides in. Maisha - “life” in Swahili. Jioni - “evening” in Swahili. This refers to where anywhere the sun doesn’t reach, Simba shouldn’t wander, because it’s too dangerous. Originally, I wanted to go with “Kivuri”, which means “shadow”. However when I went to double check that ‘shadowland’ was a thing in Lion King, referring to where the Elephant Graveyard is, it’s actually a song from the Broadway musica called “Shadowland”, sung by Nala (Heather Headley). It both mourns the desolate state of the Pridelands under Scar’s tyranny, and narrates Nala’s resolve to leave and find a way to save her people and their land. The song is absolutely gorgeous, solemn, and powerful, and contributes more than any live-action CGI Disney movie could ever come up with. Its instrumental composition features the melody lei-motif prominent in the animated film (yes, That song. the heartbreaking one). It’s one of my favourites in Lion King alongside “He Lives in You” and “Not One of Us” because I like the ones where the chorus goes off. Please just listen to the Lion King Broadway soundtrack it makes me cry with how gorgeous and heartfelt it is. Anyway in their money-grubbing ways I hope Disney puts the Broadway on Disney+ so some brave soul takes one for the team to pirate it Manyoya - intended to mean “feather”, but to my understanding it also encompasses “fur”. Uzuri - “beauty” in Swahili. Nothing too deep here, just something pertaining to Rook.

Land of Hot Sand

Aldif’ - “warmth” in Arabic (الدفء). Meant to allude to a comforting warmth, kind of hinting that the popularisation of “Land of Hot Sand” more or less leaves the official name lost in translation. Misbah - “lamp/light” in Arabic (مصباح), naturally referencing the magical lamp sought after throughout the movie. Yatamanaa - “wish” in Arabic (يتمنى). Meant to be bit a bit of a cheeky play on words. The “wish” inside the “lamp”.

Land of Pyroxene

Waldburg - Wald is "forest” in German. References the forest that Snow White runs away into after being warned of the Evil Queen’s intentions. Argent - “silver” in French. References Cinderella’s silver dress. Verre - “glass” in French. References Cinderella’s glass slipper. Miroir - “mirror” in French. References both the Mirror of Snow White and the enchanted mirror Beast gives Belle. Enchantée - “enchanted” in French. Ties into the theme of enchantments, curses, and charms prominent in French fairy tales, and specifically makes me think of the Enchanted Rose from Beauty and the Beast. Scharlachrot - “scarlet” in German. References the red colour that hides the infamous green of the poison apple’s true nature.

Isle of Lamentation

Nísos Thrínos - Greek for the isle’s name. Kapnós - “smoke” in Greek. References Hades’ iconic appearance surrounded by black smoke.

Valley of Thorns

Geimhreadh - “winter” in Irish. References the winter court of Unseelie fae in Celtic folklore.

Port of Jubilee

Nanm - "soul” in Haiitan Creole. References the importance of determination and drive prominent in Princess and the Frog.

Sekrè - “secret” in Haitian Creole. References Dr Facilier’s ulterior motives.

#twisted wonderland #worldbuilding headcanons

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marlborodean · 3 years

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here’s my analysis of a 14-yr-old supernatural episode

so remember that episode where sam fucked a werewolf? because he related to her unwilling monstrosity? well that episode is actually just about dean starting to come to grips with his childhood and his sexuality.

if you ship w/ncest do not interact. this post is not anti-sam either btw.

content warning: discussions of childhood trauma, internalized homophobia, guns, killing.

does include some images with Image Descriptions following them.

[ID: An over-the-shoulder close-up shot from the episode, focused on Madison, the werewolf, as she cries. Dean is standing behind her. They are both looking at Sam, whose shoulder is on the edge of the frame. End ID.]

Brief episode recap just in case u don’t remember. This ep is 2x17 “Heart.” Sam and Dean are hunting a werewolf. They discover that the woman they interviewed, Madison, is a werewolf (not THEE werewolf, but one of them). Sam develops a lil crush on her <3 I wrote the majority of this after watching it for the first time in almost SIX years, so i was just vibing the whole time UNTIL the last shot changed it all for me. So let me explain!

Three important points that i will refer back to:

1. The episode begins with Dean being excited to hunt a werewolf because "what about a human by day, a freak animal killing machine by moonlight don't you understand? I mean, werewolves are badass. We haven't seen one since we were kids."

2. Then the episode centers on Sam and his relationship with the werewolf woman and his own monstrosity: "[Dean: Sam, she's a monster and you're feeling sorry for her?] Maybe I understand her."

3. BUT THEN the last shot of the episode is of Dean crying as music plays (see below for the specific lyrics) and then Dean jumps at the sound of the gunshot. That's it! That's the end of the episode!

[ID: For all three screencaps, Dean is looking torturously sad. Each one is zoomed a little bit closer to his face than the last. In the last image, Dean sheds a single man tear. The captioned lyrics for the first one say "Relax, child, you were there." The second says "but only didn't realize" and the third says "and you were scared." End ID]

Even though the story is supposed to be about Sam and his monstrosity, and partly about his relationship w/romance since this is the first person he’s slept with since Jess died (at least with what is shown on screen)...the Dean Sandwich tells us otherwise. We're supposed to be taking away something about DEAN here. Like, that's the whole purpose behind the last shot focusing solely on Dean instead of Sam who is AT THAT MOMENT, KILLING THE GIRL HE HAS FEELINGS FOR. It's literally a heartbreaking, devastating, super traumatic thing for Sam to be going through, but instead we're watching Dean as a single tear slides down his face lmao. It's because this episode is about DEAN, and furthering his story.

Let’s not queer this just yet. The death of the werewolf is about/representing his loss of innocence. It's a violent disconnect from his childhood. Point # 1 shows that he is fascinated by werewolves because since he was a kid he thought they were badass, not to mention all the werewolf films he references throughout. Then, through the music lyrics over that last scene, they mirror that theme of childhood. They’ve done this before, having the diegetic music directly reference what the characters are going through. No different here: Dean is the child they’re referring to.

I have to reiterate that that's the last thing we hear before the gunshot cuts the music short and then the cut to black. "You were scared" is the last thing we hear before the gunshot, as Dean cries. ALSO I have to reiterate that Dean was looking forward to killing a werewolf and shooting it himself. So it's super fascinating that, not only is Sam the one that kills the werewolf, WE DON’T EVEN SEE IT HAPPEN.

[ID: A medium-close shot of Dean as he looks at Sam, who takes up the right half of the frame. The caption says, “Sammy, I got this one. I’ll do it.” End ID.]

Am i gonna have to say this now? The werewolf is a metaphor, okay? It's a metaphor for his innocence, which is long-dead, forever doomed. I mean, a lot of kids love werewolves because they ARE badass! It's a classic monster that anyone could easily obsess over, and with Dean's childhood it must've seemed even cooler, knowing they're real and having the power to kill this "mythical" beast. So the way he's looking forward to killing one is the way a child imagines themselves as a hero.

But what happens instead is a tragic mercy killing. It's flipping his fantasy completely on its head, and it makes Dean realize that.....his fantasies are just fantasies. They aren't real, never would be. There's nothing heroic about killing this werewolf. It's tragic as hell. When he offers to kill her himself, it's just to relieve Sam's burden, but he's reluctant still. Because, as he keeps saying, he doesn't want to be a hunter! He doesn't want this life! He's tired of killing! And that's also what he's mourning as he cries and startles at the gunshot. His fantasies will never be real and his childhood could never have been normal and he never got a chance to be a kid because being a hunter was thrust on him at such a young age. And now it feels inescapable.

[ID: A gif of the slow zoom on Dean’s face as the single tears slips down his cheek. He jumps at the gunshot, then blinks and his lip wobbles. End ID.]

So now we can queer it :-) Of course all monster stories can be easily queered, but werewolves are popularly queered. The first example that comes to mind is An American Werewolf in London (1981) isn’t an overtly queer film (though it is Jewish!) but it’s definitely read that way by a lot of people!! Anyway the film was directed by John Landis which JUST SO HAPPENS to be the pseudonym Dean goes by in this episode. hmm. (Also, interestingly, the BTVS ep where the first gay character comes out references this film too)

[ID: Sam and Dean are standing close to each other. Sam is in the foreground, not in focus. Dean, behind him, says, “Landis. And Detective Dante.” End ID.]

There’s this essay about the queer werewolf that you can read here (and they also talk about fandom in it! very fascinating), where they say in the intro: “the werewolf seems an obvious choice as a queer monster with its identity-disrupting hybridity, as well as its atavistic, and, thus, disallowable sexuality.” A lot like Kristeva’s theory of the abject body! which is popular in queer theory.

This episode is then queering Sam—his attraction to the werewolf makes him abject—but it also queers Dean thru the way his attitude towards the werewolf transforms (get it?) throughout the ep. His desire and eagerness to kill the werewolves is obviously ingrained in him from John’s parenting. Consider what he said in 2x03 “Bloodlust”: “And the way he raised us, to hate those things—and man, I hate them, I do.” In conjunction with the monsters in the show being seen as queer allegories (the gorgon, as an example of an explicit comparison), Dean’s excitement to kill the werewolf can be read as internalized homophobia and repressing any of his own feelings.

Remember, though, right before that line in “Bloodlust,” he also said, “What if we killed things that didn’t deserve killing?” He’s really beginning to question whether all monsters are bad, and what it means to kill them. Is he also questioning what he believes of queer people? What John believed of queer people? The loss of innocence and queering both slot together through that final shot, imo: he’s crying because he realizes his fantasies aren’t real, but he’s also mourning the fact that he never could have had the chance to grow up without John’s control, and now it’s forever tainted his worldview. What else could he have been without that? (The answer is evident in 4x17 “It’s a Terrible Life.”)

Dean was taught to hate queer people but he doesn't want to. He wants to get out of the life but it feels inescapable. He wants to kill a werewolf and then when he has the chance, he doesn't want to. He actually cries as it's killed. It scares him, having to confront that what he thought he knew was wrong, but he knows all the same that he’ll never have the chance to have grown up without that.

#is anyone up? anyone wanna read this? i finished this instead of doing homework #sorry the end is bad LMAO i'm notoriously bad at writing conclusions #also i want to say that the monster allegories in SPN more often have to do with race and not homophobia. but this episode sticks out to me #as representing queerness instead of race. especially because they set it up as compared to Sam's story which is SO queer.#spn #what do i tag this #ej.pdf #supernatural #bi dean #my professors would give me a bad grade on this #portfolio

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cnnamonrolls · 2 years

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i straight up just wrote (retold in a different pov) a story what is happening what the actual heck

the og story's a short film called 'missing halloween' if you wanna check it out :)

you found me

okay so in all honesty this is just to use pretty dividers, but i watched a really cool short film earlier and im just gonna try and re-tell it but in first person

10. 12. 2015. 10:20 am

dear diary journal

it's halloween!!! it's been too long. i'm so excited for later, i think ive really outdone myself on the costume part.

3:20 pm

dear journal,

there's this girl sitting outside on the sidewalk and she's all alone. she looks like she's around my age- should i say hi????

trick or treating starts at 3:30!!! maybe i should invite her to join me??

4:50 pm

dear journal,

im back from trick or treating! there is so much to say. where to start?????

okay firstly, remember that girl? well i started talking to her and she seemed nice; she wasn't much of a talker but we had fun. i gave her one of those candies with a message and hers said 'you found me'! i guess we're talking about how i found the candy? i dunno

secondly???? nobody seems to notice her? no one would give her candy even if she's right there beside me! and when i ask 'what about her?' they just go hm? then leave?- did she do something wrong??

6:15 pm

i. am. so. offended. everyones ignoring her like she's an ant!!!

even my own mum won't talk to her! they took it too far. they called a doctor and they diagnosed me with having imaginary friends???? is this some sort of joke???

shes kind. funny. simple. she makes me feel important. why can't anyone see that???

10:45 pm

dear journal,

..i have no words. i am confused and sad and surprised and devastated and i feel like jumping off a cliff. i just witnessed the impossible. i want to scream.

she led me into this.. forest. at first i thought she was playing tag; but then i saw bear traps on the ground. luckily i missed them all while trying to chase her. i was so exhausted. i didn't know what was happening. when was she going to stop running???

suddenly i saw her sitting under a tree- she looked tired. i sat beside her and she gave me a candy! my message said 'i found you' and her candy said 'you found me'. was it a coincidence? up to know i cannot be sure.

it was very peaceful- i heard crickets chirpping and we were just there under the moonlight. she told me she'd be coming back next halloween. i was a bit confused, i thought she lives near me.

it was pretty quiet for a bit when i heard.. a voice. i heard someone calling me?

it was my mum. she was with police too. i couldn't care to open my eyes. my senses weren't working properly. in my mind, it was just me and her enjoying the moonlight.

when i came to my senses though, i didn't see her anymore. my mum was shouting my name, and when i looked to my right i saw a dead body! i was so freaked out; i wanted to scream. but i didn't. that dead body was my friend. it was already rotting; and she was still holding her little candy wrapper that said 'you found me'

11:46 pm

dear diary,

the police took my mum and i home after a bit. i couldn't speak, they were asking me questions but i couldn't hear them. i couldn't process anything.

my mum explained that the police flipped out her records book and she saw that my friend has been missing for over a year. what? i know. have i been talking to a ghost???? i guess it wont matter since i'll see her next year but still :(

i mean it all makes sense now. she led me there; because no one has found her body. i'm going to miss her

but now i have to sleep. i don't think i'll be able to, but i'll try. night :)

#what the actual hell #what has gotten into me today #HHHHHHH #this is so weird #this is really weird #tw dead body #thoughts 💃#hhhh this is so weird #i. am. not. a. writer. lets make that clear #okay bye #ignore this actually i just wanted to try out dividers #:D

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pseudomenudo · 3 years

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I have decided to create a challenge for Pride Month.

Let’s all reflect on the things that have shaped and affected us as LGBTQ+ individuals. I challenge you to answer this question: What’s an LGBTQ+ (theme/symbolism/mentions of LGBTQ+ anything!) song, movie, piece of art, book, poem, quote, ANYTHING, that you like? Why do you like it? Feel free to share it all in your response to this post! Even YouTube vids, spotify links, whatever! Anything that shows us your fave stuff regarding LGBTQ+. I’ll go first.

POETRY:

A poem by my favorite poet Walt Whitman: “Though biographers continue to debate Whitman's sexuality, he is usually described as either homosexual or bisexual in his feelings and attractions.” (reference: https://bookshop.org/books/poems-9781519702807/9781519702807)

Song of the Open Road:

Afoot and light-hearted I take to the open road,

Healthy, free, the world before me, The long brown path before me, leading wherever I choose. Henceforth I ask not good-fortune—I am good- fortune, Henceforth I whimper no more, postpone no more, need nothing, Strong and content, I travel the open road. The earth—that is sufficient, I do not want the constellations any nearer, I know they are very well where they are, I know they suffice for those who belong to them. Still here I carry my old delicious burdens, I carry them, men and women—I carry them with me wherever I go, I swear it is impossible for me to get rid of them, I am filled with them, and I will fill them in return. You road I travel and look around! I believe you are not all that is here, I believe that much unseen is also here.

A large part of my sexuality and my freedom to express my sexuality healthily is thanks to Walt Whitman. Not only did he save my life once, he helped me understand myself.

ART:

As for art. Frida Kahlo was a great inspiration for me in terms of female sexuality, loving both men and women, and thinking of sexuality as more than sex and attraction. I also have a strong desire to become a mother one day, as she did. I am also terrified of infertility, as she was.

“While many maintain she had sexual relationships with both men and women, what is true is that she considered sexuality as something that went beyond mere intercourse. It spoke of creation, life, and, of course, her wish to conceive and become a mother. This obsession was a constant in her life and was beautifully immortalized in the bright shapes and colors of her canvases.” (reference: https://culturacolectiva.com/art/frida-kahlo-sexuality-paintings)

TW: Blood, nudity, infertility, hospital bed, childbirth

MOVIE:

TW for the movie: sex scenes, some sexuality, use of the n word, drug use, brief violence, and language throughout.

I very much enjoyed the movie Moonlight. Not only was it filmed where I live, I also went to a showing for it near the place it was filmed. When it came out, I was overjoyed, and loved the themes it showed in the movie. The element of water has always been a recurring one in my own life. Moonlight handles difficult topics, such as incarceration, death, prejudice, racism, homosexuality, toxic masculinity, growing up in poverty, familial relationships, homophobia, AIDS, father-son relationships and dynamics, black culture, how black gay men are viewed, love and relationships, separations, machismo, anxiety, etc. in a beautiful, graceful manner. The main characters father is from Cuba, and speaks of black people and black culture in cuba. This is something that isn't spoken of as much as it should be. The afro-cuban culture in cuba is important, and a part of Cuban people's history and ancestry. As a Cuban woman, I was proud to hear about the experience the father shared, not necessarily because of the experience itself, but because people will hear it and learn. Things must change. Many of these themes are things I struggled with in my own life. I felt a sort of kinship with the movie and its characters.

Have some clips of the film:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7D0T4ivCsF4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z6yMItXePG8&ab_channel=T-Manfilm

MUSIC:

I think I heard this song when I was around eleven years old. I think so many people know it already, it's very popular, but it was the first song I heard that really expressed feeling love for someone of the same sex. When I tried explaining to my mother how I felt inside, in terms of my sexuality and attraction to the members of the same sex, I showed her the youtube video of the song. It was a very interesting experience lol. Some lyrics I felt I related to were:

"Mother looking at me Tell me what do you see? Yes, I've lost my mind Daddy looking at me Will I ever be free? Have I crossed the line?"

And

"And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed They say it's my fault, but I want her so much Want to fly her away,"

Spotify Link: https://open.spotify.com/track/4bJygwUKrRgq1stlNXcgMg

Music Video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mGBaXPlri8

QUOTE/BOOK

A quote that recently touched my heart was:

“In the darkness, two shadows, reaching through the hopeless, heavy dusk. Their hands meet, and light spills in a flood like a hundred golden urns pouring out of the sun.” from The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

When I read this, I thought, “This is what matters when you are with the one you love. This is all that should matter.”

Have a summary of the book from Goodreads.com (one of my favorite websites for organizing my books. If you want to follow me there, send me a message or ask and I’ll give it to you):

“Greece in the age of heroes. Patroclus, an awkward young prince, has been exiled to the court of King Peleus and his perfect son Achilles. By all rights their paths should never cross, but Achilles takes the shamed prince as his friend, and as they grow into young men skilled in the arts of war and medicine their bond blossoms into something deeper - despite the displeasure of Achilles' mother Thetis, a cruel sea goddess. But then word comes that Helen of Sparta has been kidnapped. Torn between love and fear for his friend, Patroclus journeys with Achilles to Troy, little knowing that the years that follow will test everything they hold dear.Profoundly moving and breathtakingly original, this rendering of the epic Trojan War is a dazzling feat of the imagination, a devastating love story, and an almighty battle between gods and kings, peace and glory, immortal fame and the human heart.”

And that’s it for me! I challenge ALL OF YOU to continue this and share your own. Feel free to reblog this and tag your own friends and mutuals to complete this challenge! Let’s share with each other the beautiful pieces of work that have inspired us as members of the LGBTQ+ community.

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laikuh · 3 years

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20 questions

I was tagged by @untoldblisses THANK YOU I LOVE BEING TAGGED.

1. What do you prefer to be called namewise? feel free to call me vin!

2. When is your birthday? july 9th

3. Where do you live? 'murica

4. Three things you are doing right now? filling this out, drinking an iced mocha, and listening to music!

5. Four fandoms that have peaked your interest? supernatural always, hannibal always, annnnd idk. ive been thinking of rereading the captive prince trilogy which always sends me spiralling in a good way. and im like blanking on a fourth fandom. it is largely spn central around here.

6. How has the pandemic been treating you? honestly, not terribly. im very grateful for the experience ive had bc i know its a privilege. i kept my job, as did my friends and family. the additional time has left more opportunities to pursue hobbies and interests, and i am a homebody, so my preferred lifestyle has been the norm. that said, there's also been the requisite fear, guilt, anxiety, and stress to contend with.

7. A song you can’t stop listening to right now? hmmmmmm....this is where it ends by alice boman.

8. Recommend a movie. i wish i could say i watched a lot of movies these days, but i just don't. in terms of general favorites people maybe haven't seen yet? christ uh...this is embarrassing i literally studied film. moonlight remains an absolutely devastating film.

9. How old are you? 30!!! and loving it.

10. School, university, occupation, other? i work in education! so looking forward to summer when things slow down.

11. Do you prefer heat or cold? cold for sure. but not too cold lol. i can't do snow, but right up to it with lots of rain and gray is ideal.

12. Name one fact others may not know about you. y'all don't know shit about me at this point so uh. if i were to release one fact i might say im bi!

13. Are you shy? i hate meeting new people but i'm pretty good at it all the same. so i guess no. i prefer to talk to nobody ever but when forced i can socialize fine.

14. Preferred pronouns? she/her

15. Biggest pet peeves? fandom tomfoolery tbh. like i've said befor,e im trying to keep this actual blog free from fandom-specific wank (i think show wank is okay, like we can have opinions) so i won't get into the specifics, i just think fandom needs to chill out. we're all a lot more alike than we think. that alongside people who refuse to take accountability for mistakes are the biggest thorns in my side these days.

16. What is your favourite “dere” type? lol i know what this is in reference to but idk enough about it to have an answer, apologies.

17. Rate your life from 1-10. i agree with untoldbliss. probably an objective 7.

18. What’s your main blog? a ~secret.~

19. List your sideblogs and what they’re used for. i actually don't have any sideblogs here! this is my main in terms of this account and the only one here. i don't imagine i'll ever have sideblogs here.

20. Is there something people need to know about you before becoming friends? lol i guess just know i want to be friends. it's been one of the nicest parts of creating this account, actually talking with people. im bad at initiating, so i guess that's the biggest thing. but if we're mutuals, im here to chat!

insert spiel about tagging giving me anxiety, and actually untoldbliss tagged the folks i probably would have lol! so im looking forward to your answers. @decadent-prince if you haven't done this yet and would like to? literally anyone tho pls say i tagged you if you want to do this! consider yourself tagged!

#shut up vin

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chaneilkular · 3 years

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HELLO so finished happy together a little bit ago and hmm lots of thoughts definitely very 🥴 first of all i should probs read movie summaries because i didn't think it would be so sad KSJDKS esp cuz of the title yk. i really liked the coloring & cinematography and how it started out black and white but became colorful i THINK when ho and lai touched or smth..... also chang what an angel loved his friendship with lai and the recorder scene and lai crying gosh (parallel to ho crying!!!!!! there were a lot of parallels actually which i really enjoyed). didn't love the ending tbh like the music was so upbeat and didn't really fit imo????? but also i was so scared when lai was at the falls i thought that was gna be the end 😭 overall it was good though i appreciate how complex their relationship was but ugh wish they could've communicated and been together it was a bit frustrating they couldn't when they so clearly liked each other yk?? but also there were a lot of signs of toxicity..... lowkey feel like i missed smth i didn't realize ho was doing sex work till i checked wikipedia halfway thru my brain is 😬 OH last thing loved the song at the falls the first time it was italian and also in moonlight!!!! which also have u seen moonlight??? i feel like u def have but i just realized i'm not totally sure. ne way would love to hear ur thoughts on this hope you're sleeping well & have a good week :-) <3

hello! yes yes yes. I thought you knew happy together was sad af otherwise I would’ve warned you, my bad. I feel like this film is so devastating. this feeling of being lost and never being able to return home is honestly so fucked up. also like, the imagery. I don’t want this to sound mean or bad but this film is so depressing... in a good way shgkgshks. it’s been a while since I’ve last seen it but I think the toxicity is somewhat the point. maybe some things cannot work out and it’s best to move on from them because they will hold you trapped. no romantic place (apparently the film has the alternative title buenos aires affair), no romantic feelings will fix that. so in a way, they were happy together but this happiness came from this messy place they were in and only lai was able to move on from it in the end... also yeah, I’ve seen moonlight, even before the whole acadamy award win and everything but I probably should’ve rewatched in higher quality because very little people seemed to care about it when it first came out and there were only low quality uploads online (film pirates are homoph*bic, there we said it), so most of the cinematography I’ve seen was actually in gif sets sghksghks. it really is important to not watch films in bad quality, trust me on that. your first impression will be completely different. I have to say, I had a feeling moonlight was somewhat close to wong kar wai films in tone and imagery (despite clearly dealing with different topics... maybe) but I only realized that when I saw people make comparison posts and videos on it. anyway, I think wong kar wai films are good if not the best inspiration for films including romance and love, barry jenkins got that right. and moonlight is an amazing film in its own right but for me personally, seeing a little bit of wong kar wai in it, really makes it. especially when I think about my blueberry nights where wong kar wai tried to translate his work into an american setting and that really just sucked, so don’t watch that sghksghks

#glad you liked it :)#my keysmashes all look the same sghksghks #... and again #hm let me think about some recs though #answered

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letterboxd · 4 years

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Pride: 25 Queer Films To Love.

Dating Amber writer and director David Freyne introduces our London correspondent Ella Kemp to 25 of his favorite LGBTQIA films.

A coming-out, coming-of-age film, David Freyne’s Dating Amber follows “baby gays” Eddie (Fionn O’Shea) and Amber (Lola Petticrew), who act as each other’s beards in order to stop speculation about their sexualities. Released on Amazon Prime Video in the UK for Pride month, it’s winning praise from Letterboxd members as a “charming” and “gentle” comedy-drama “full of loveliness that extends beyond the Irish accents”.

Lola Petticrew and Fionn O’Shea as Amber and Eddie in ‘Dating Amber’.

As the number of films by and about the gay and trans community expands, we asked Freyne if he could narrow down a list of ten favorites for us. The answer was no—instead, we got 25!

“There are so many extraordinary queer films beyond this list, but all of these films just really affected me when I saw them. Some were the first time I saw queerness on screen, while I deeply identified with others. And, as a filmmaker, each of them makes me braver to fight to tell stories that aren't always easy to get made.

“They are in no particular order because I don’t want to bump into Barry Jenkins (which is obviously going to happen) and have to explain that he is number five on that list (that he will definitely read) for no specific reason. It’s just a technicality.”

David Freyne’s 25 Favorite LGBTQIA+ Films

My Summer of Love (2004) Directed by Paweł Pawlikowski

Paweł Pawlikowski’s film feels like a dream that sweeps you up along with it, helped along by incredible early performances from Natalie Press and Emily Blunt. The hypnotic use of Goldfrapp's ‘Lovely Head’ is probably my favorite use of a song in any film ever. Their drug-fuelled dancing was a massive inspiration for Eddie and Amber’s baby steps into Dublin’s gay scene in Dating Amber.

Weekend (2011) Directed by Andrew Haigh

I never fail to cry buckets at the end of this heartbreaking gem. It’s small in the best sense of the word. Two people fall in love over one intimate weekend. Their gayness is both incidental and totally fundamental. It’s so delicate and moving. Andrew Haigh is a master.

But I’m a Cheerleader (1999) Directed by Jamie Babbit

Jamie Babbit’s debut is a brilliant, campy comedy about a cheerleader sent to a conversion therapy camp. I love it for all the reasons many critics (at the time) disliked it. It is subversive, quirky and defiantly upbeat. And it stars Natasha Lyonne and Clea Duvall. Enough said.

Paris is Burning (1990) Directed by Jennie Livingston

I’m not saying anything new when I say that Paris is Burning is necessary viewing. It’s a hilarious, moving and eye-opening look at the (mostly) Black trans women in New York’s ball scene. It is a glimpse into the lives of these extraordinary people who risked everything to live authentically, for themselves and each other. And at a time when our trans family is so under attack, it is vital to see such iconic figures from our community. You’ve probably seen it. Re-watch it. Also those end notes will make you cry.

Happy Together (1997) Directed by Wong Kar-wai

As with all Wong Kar-wai’s work, it is jaw-droppingly gorgeous. It’s a tough watch, a portrait of a toxic, failing relationship. But it looks beautiful. They’re miserable and co-dependent. It’s abusive and awful. But it’s great. It really is a great film. I’m not selling this one well. Just watch it.

Moonlight (2016) Directed by Barry Jenkins

Definitely worth watching after Happy Together. Not just because it will make you feel better, but because Barry Jenkins has noted it as a big influence. Also, Moonlight is a masterpiece. You know that, of course. Side note: I realize I’ll never be able to create a hand-job scene as powerful and tender as Jenkins did here, but, in Dating Amber, I made three comedy hand-jobs. Take that Jenkins!

God’s Own Country (2017) Directed by Francis Lee

You can feel Francis Lee in every frame of this film. It’s personal filmmaking at its very best, with wonderful performances from Josh O’Connor and Alec Secăreanu. And it has the most beautifully romantic ending that you only realize we lack for LGBTQ characters when you see it laid out so wonderfully. When we were trying to finance Dating Amber and people suggested it was too Irish, I’d just reference God’s Own Country, which is so defiantly Yorkshire, and they’d shut up. Also, Secăreanu’s jumper with a thumb hole is my style icon. Bring on Ammonite!

Can You Ever Forgive Me? (2018) Directed by Marielle Heller

Marielle Heller is such a brilliant filmmaker. This film is based on the memoir by Lee Israel who forged letters by famous people to sell. It’s a genre piece that feels like it could have been made in the 70s. But what I love about it the most is that it is a rare example of a film that centers the friendship between a lesbian and a gay man. Why do films usually treat us like we exist in totally separate worlds? Anyway, it’s a joyous watch.

Tangerine (2015) Directed by Sean Baker

I’m obsessed with tightly plotted films and Tangerine doesn’t waste a frame. It’s 88 minutes of pure wit, charm and entertainment in line with the best of old-school Hollywood. You instantly forget that Baker’s film is shot on an iPhone and just get swept up in the extraordinary performances of Mya Taylor and Kitana Kiki Rodriguez. It’s such a mystery they don’t work more. (Reader: it’s not a mystery. It’s because they are Black trans women, and the industry is shit.)

Portrait of a Lady On Fire (2019) Directed by Céline Sciamma

We all bow at the alter of Céline Sciamma. This film is perfection. The sparse-but-powerful use of music, exquisite photography and extraordinary performances that burn beneath the stillness. The final shots of Adèle Haenel will feed your soul for a year. (Side note: face masks have never looked so stylish.)

Sunday Bloody Sunday (1971) Directed by John Schlesinger

This was John Schlesinger’s follow up to his best-known film, Midnight Cowboy. A middle-aged gay doctor (Peter Finch), and a divorced woman (Glenda Jackson), are both in an open love triangle with a younger, bisexual sculptor (Murray Head). It’s quite low-key and far tamer now than when it was released, but it’s a beautiful film and Schlesinger’s most personal. He was one of the few openly gay directors of his time. And Jackson’s performance steals it.

Far From Heaven (2002) Directed by Todd Haynes

Todd Haynes’ stunning film will make you immediately go out and discover all of Douglas Sirk’s glorious technicolor melodramas. Julianne Moore’s performance as a wife who discovers her husband is gay will break you. Dennis Quaid is also terrific as her closeted husband.

The Watermelon Woman (1996) Directed by Cheryl Dunye

Cheryl Dunye’s low-budget debut is a seminal queer film. A video store worker and documentarian (played by Dunye) starts a new relationship while becoming obsessed with ‘the watermelon woman’, a Black actress forgotten by history. It’s lo-fi, funny and a, far too rare, film about race and sexuality.

My Beautiful Laundrette (1985) Directed by Stephen Frears

It may have been the first time I saw gay characters on screen and, at the time, it petrified me. But what an amazing film about love, acceptance and the power to change. Fun fact: Daniel Day-Lewis spent a year as a tumble dryer in preparation for his role.

Beautiful Thing (1996) Directed by Hettie MacDonald

Hettie MacDonald’s coming-of-age film is so lovely, honest and tender. James Harvey adapted it from his own play of the same name. The soundtrack is almost entirely The Mamas and the Papas. I am surprised some cigar-smoking West-End mogul hasn’t attempted a musical adaptation. Or maybe they have, I don’t know.

Pride (2014) Directed by Matthew Warchus

Such a purely entertaining film while being urgent, political and deeply moving. Beresford’s script is a masterclass in plotting and if you don’t cry at the end then you are dead inside. Sorry but that’s just science. Also it has the most emotional postscript coda since, well, Paris is Burning.

Love is Strange (2014) Directed by Ira Sachs

Ira Sachs is one of my favorite current filmmakers and criminally underrated. I mean, he’s appreciated, but he needs to be lauded. Love is Strange is such a charming and quietly devastating love story about an older gay couple who lose their apartment and have to couch surf with relatives. It’s one of the most effective films in dealing with the rental crisis in big cities, something he does equally brilliantly in the follow-up, Little Men.

A Fantastic Woman (2017) Directed by Sebastián Lelio

Sebastián Lelio’s film is a beautiful story about one trans woman’s grief after the unexpected death of her older partner. But what makes this film so spectacular is the captivating performance by Daniela Vega. We need to see more of her on screen.

BPM (Beats per Minute) (2017) Directed by Robin Campillo

It’s a film about the AIDS activism of Act Up in 1990s Paris. What makes this so incredible is how joyous it is. Strobe-doused dance scenes punctuate this film that will make you want to take to the streets and fight for your rights.

The Queen of Ireland (2015) Directed by Conor Horgan

This documentary by Conor Horgan follows Ireland’s most famous drag queen, Panti Bliss (aka Rory O’Neill). It’s about his life, a legal battle (a bunch of homophobes sued Rory for calling them homophobes on national TV) and the staging of a show in his hometown. Central to all this is Ireland’s historic vote on marriage equality, something that Panti was a powerful figure in. If you want to laugh and have your heart soar in seeing confirmation of how a once painfully conservative country moved to love and equality, watch this.

The Kids Are All Right (2010) Directed by Lisa Cholodenko

Lisa Cholodenko’s feature is a warm, witty and realistic look at a lesbian couple and their children. Every performance is pitch perfect. I can’t believe it’s a decade old and that we have had so few similar films since.

Booksmart (2019) Directed by Olivia Wilde

We need more joyous films with queer leads and Olivia Wilde’s debut is just that. Set over one night of belated partying, we follow best friends Molly and Amy (Beanie Feldstein and Kaitlyn Dever), one of whom happens to be a lesbian. It is just so much fun to watch.

All About My Mother (1999) Directed by Pedro Almodóvar

I mean this list could just be an Almodóvar filmography, but All About My Mother just happened to be the first of his I saw and it blew my little gay mind. It’s simply about love in its truest sense. Almodóvar said it best with his dedication, “To all actresses who have played actresses. To all women who act. To men who act and become women. To all the people who want to be mothers. To my mother.”

Female Trouble (1974) Directed by John Waters

You can’t have a queer film list without John Waters, and this 1974 classic is my favorite of his. It follows Dawn Davenport (played by the legendary Divine) from teen delinquent to the electric chair. It’s hilarious, irreverent and distasteful in the ways only Waters can be.

Saint Maud (2019) Directed by Rose Glass

Rose Glass’s debut film isn’t out yet and so technically shouldn’t be on the list. But I saw at a festival last year and loved it, so there. It’s a horror film about a private nurse (rising star Morfydd Clark) who tries to save the soul of her deviant and lesbian patient (the always-brilliant Jennifer Ehle). It’s eerie, stylish and the sort of debut all us filmmakers wish we had. Shut up, you’re jealous!