#which was fine! I’m glad they’re comfortable talking and asking my questions about this

[radioactiveswampmonsters]

Florida trip went well! For the actual purposes, my mom’s birthday, yeah no it went really great, it was wonderful

For my whole anxiety leading up to all of it, it went better than expected! The people I was most worried about didn’t say or do anything, but more than that I was able to have some candid conversations with my mom about trans stuff which was really nice, and I told my aunt I started hrt! She was the first person (outside immediate family) I came out to forever ago (cause her daughter, my cousin, also came as trans before I did) so I knew it would be totally fine, but still her reaction and support was still so kind and nice ❤️

#Dorian is on t #my mom and great aunt were both surprised to find out I’d have to take t my whole life #which was fine! I’m glad they’re comfortable talking and asking my questions about this #my aunt (different aunt lol) did say something that I Think About now tho #I mentioned I started hrt (i said it in conjunction with bragging about zab and how great they are and I love them) #and she said yeah I wondered - I didn’t wanna ask cause it’s your business what you wanna share but I was curious cause I noticed changes #and like she’s fine! I appreciate her very much #but now I’m curious if anyone else DID notice as well but just didn’t say anything?? #which is also fine like I’m more than okay with that. I didn’t wanna deal with comments from People #but I Think About It

[larphacks]

Ten Tips for Crewing your First LARP

LARPHacks, my friends have convinced me to try LARP and I’ve decided to crew my first event so I can get a feel for the game before diving in as a character. How do I make sure it’s a good experience?

Glad you asked! This is geared primarily at people crewing small-medium “minifest”/large-linear games, about 40-100 people, based at sites like scout camps in the UK; but I think and hope plenty of the advice will be applicable more widely.

1. PACK YOUR STUFF

Crewing starts a week before the event. Check with other crew what you should be packing and make sure it's together. There's an example generic LARP packing list here, but as a bare minimum you should pack:

Comfortable footwear with ankle support

Sleeping gear, unless you are SURE the site has bedding

Warm & waterproof clothing sufficient to comfortably stand still in the rain in winter at night for >30 minutes

Washkit, including any medications and a towel

Plain dark trousers and top

Phone charger and power bank

List of emergency phone numbers (partners/friends/relatives) in case you damage your phone or get stuck out of signal

2. READ THE BRIEFS

Crewing starts a week before the event! There should be some material available to help crew understand the backstory to the event, roughly how it will run, what the PCs are trying to achieve and what obstacles they will encounter. You may have the opportunity to volunteer to play NPCs in advance, and those NPCs may have briefs. You should revise the rules so you understand what calls and mechanisms you'll encounter in play.

Sometimes you'll find there is too much of this material and it's overwhelming. If that happens, you should ask for a one-page summary, or a priority order of stuff you "must" read vs "could/should" read.

Sometimes you'll find there isn't enough of this stuff and you don't really understand what you're meant to be doing. If that happens, you should find a member of the game team or a more experienced crew member and ask them questions!

The rhino has a complex and intricate set of character motivations which the player was revising for weeks in advance.

3. LISTEN TO THE REFS

When you get to site, the refs/game team become your bosses. You should keep an ear out for when they're trying to talk. Good crew rooms are noisy, chaotic places, full of people enthusing about the encounter they've just come back from, or revising their brief for the one they're going out on next - all while trying to put on a chainmail shirt and find an appropriate weapon in the pile and glue the extremely important cardboard crown prop back together. This is fine - embrace the chaos! Get excited! But keep one eye on the refs and shut up when they start talking.

It's always okay to say "no" if the refs ask you to do something, but try to make it "no but":

"No, I don't think I can manage to fight again right now, but I could go in again as one of the non-combat restless ghosts we had earlier."

"No, I'm not ready for another role now, but I'll be good in 30 minutes, I’ll wait here until then."

"No, I don't have the brains to absorb a complex brief, but I'm happy to go in as something like a thug or bodyguard if someone else plays the Prince."

4. ASK THE REFS

At the same time, while the refs are busy, they would rather know if you're having a problem or don't understand something. Don't suffer in silence. There are always lulls in game time, so if you need help, collar a ref and ask them. Even better, ask a more experienced crew member - they'll be able to read the room and find you the right moment to speak to someone; they might even be able to fix the problem themselves.

If you're really keen to do something, make sure you communicate that to the refs - ideally before the event - so they have the chance to find something. Whether it's making kit, wearing a particular costume, playing a particular type of role - always worth asking!

A crew tent with all the essentials: bottled water, electric light, queer pride.

4. THROW YOURSELF IN

No matter how well organised the game LOOKS, it will have gone off the rails approximately two hours after time in. This is normal and expected. You will end up being asked to play roles you didn't prepare for: this is also fine and expected.

Try to play as many different roles as possible within your physical, mental and emotional capacity. Expect a big variety of different things to do. Throw yourself into the world and have a go at everything. You will not enjoy it all equally and that's fine - you're here to learn what works for you

Even if you have been given a single "big name" NPC with an important plot role, be prepared for them to arrive on screen late, leave early, or fall down a flight of stairs onto some PC knives thirty seconds after they appear. Getting keen for an NPC is great - getting overinvested in one is a recipe for disappointment and bad feeling (on your part or the players’).

Look around you at what the other crew are doing. If a role looks like fun, join in! If a ref asks for volunteers, stick your hand up! The louder, more interesting roles will go to more experienced LARPers who are "known quantities" unless you volunteer for them. Often those more experienced LARPers are itching for someone else to volunteer and will be delighted to coach you through being a squad leader, an evil magician, an angry space knight or whatever else comes up.

If you feel anxious in a complex or high energy role, ask if you can have a more experienced crew member as an IC servant, second-in-command or bodyguard. This gives them an excuse to stick close to you and whisper in your ear if you stray off track.

5. YOU ARE NOT A PLAYER

You are at this LARP to help create a living world for the PCs - the protagonists - to inhabit and affect. You may have a very important NPC with complex motivations and great kit - and you should immerse yourself and play them to the hilt! - but their concerns and goals must come secondary to the players.

Here are a few ways to reinforce that:

No NPC-on-NPC Action. NPCs should talk to each other as little as possible, only ever with players present, and ideally only ever at player instigation. If the players have worked all night to get the Margrave and the Duchess to negotiate a peace treaty, then of course they can negotiate. (Though it would be better if they each empowered a PC legate to negotiate on their behalf....). But it should be a big public negotiation with lots of opportunities for the players to observe and interject. If you find yourself talking to another NPC in private, then stop, walk away, find a PC and do your business in a way which includes and centres them instead. NPCs talking to NPCs with no player engagement is sometimes called “Facewank”, and is one of the three cardinal sins of bad LARP design.

Fight Generously. In combat roles, try to "sell" every blow the players make by flinching, rolling away, shouting in pain. It's good to give the players a challenge, but it's even better to challenge them AND make them feel heroic and badass when they defeat you.

Spot the Quiet Ones. Every time you go in as a “talky” NPC, look for the players who aren’t running to greet you, playing leadership roles, or pushing themselves forward. Give them an opportunity to engage with your role.

So, tell me about... It’s great to deliver your brief; it’s even cooler to give the players a chance to deliver their unique stories. Ask players about their kit, their customs, their names and deeds. There’s no quicker way to create the sense of a living world and culture than to have a fully IC reaction - and it can be anything! Approval, disgust, awe, curiosity - to something you already knew OC about a PC.

An NPC is there to fulfill a function - note briefing notes tucked into belt!

6. LOOK AFTER YOU

Self care is important for two reasons: you’re at a physically, mentally and emotionally demanding hobby, and you want to keep yourself safe; and if you don’t look after yourself, then it’s going to be one of the other crew or ref team taking time out of running the game to look after you. It isn’t big or hard or clever to forget to drink water or fight so hard you feel faint. It isn’t cool to wear uncomfortable kit (no matter how great it looks) which exhausts you to the point you’re incapable of participating in the game, or to keep banging your head against a role you’re really not enjoying.

Ask for help before you need it, not after; make your accessibility needs and limitations clear to the game team in advance; give yourself enough food, water, sleep and decompression time between intense roles. Looking after yourself isn’t selfish, it’s part of being a responsible crewmember.

A social role can make a great break between more physically active roles.

7. LOOK AFTER YOUR BUDDIES

Even if you’re new, you can still keep an eye on your fellow crewmembers. Check in on them if they seem down or subdued, and make sure they’re remembering to drink enough water and get some rest. A great way to cheer someone up is asking them what their favourite moment of the event has been so far, or to ask them to tell you about a highlight of a previous LARP experience - getting people to tell war stories is a good way to get perspective on the game.

And what friendly souls all of these crew seem to be!

8. IMPROVE YOUR FOXHOLE

Crew rooms are always chaos, particularly crew rooms for medium-sized combat games. Work out where things are meant to live and anytime there’s a break, gently tidy things up. Wash out cups, put the swords back where the swords live, throw rubbish away.

Go one better and improve the conditions - are people unsure of where the costume/weapons get stored? Grab a Sharpie and some paper and duct tape, and start making signs. Is there an obvious trip hazard? Tape it down or move it. Refs have left radios scattered over the desks? Put the spare ones on to charge.

If you don’t keep the crew room tidy, you’ll be left wearing the chicken wig.

9. PACK DOWN

Everyone is very excited and frothy at the end of an event, and it can be really compelling to catch up with the players you’ve only ever seen IC all weekend! But there is plenty of work to do to get the site collapsed, kit packed away, and everything cleaned and tidied. Make sure you leave enough energy to pack down your own and the event kit, and if you can’t see anything obvious to do, grab a mop or a cloth and start cleaning part of the site.

10. FROTH AND SELF CARE

Be prepared to look after yourself in the days after the event. Take a day off to recover.  Sleep, eat and rehydrate. You will be more drained than you realise. Carefully clean and disinfect any little cuts or grazes you picked up - the outside is dirty and they will infect quickly.

If it’s gone well, you’ll be on a big emotional high! If it hasn’t, you may feel a bit rotten. In either case, engaging in after-game froth on social media can be a great way to maintain the good memories of the event, as long as you’re sensible. Try to be generous with your engagement - give other people compliments on cool stuff you saw them do, tell them their kit looked cool, and try to think of something nice to say at least once for every time you’re complimented.

You may get a bit of low mood ("event drop") after a day or two. That's okay. It will pass. Write down the good frothy memories now while you're hyped about it and re-read them when you're low.

If some things didn't go so well, it's absolutely OK to talk and vent about them, but it’s courteous do it in a place the game team can't see it (e.g. personal Facebook, on a filter) for the first week.

Write down what worked well (roles/interactions you enjoyed, kit you liked) and not so well (things you should have packed, things you'd have liked to do but missed the chance) while it's fresh in your mind. Review the list next time.

I liked the bit where I died!

(Credit to Jessie for this bit:) When you roleplay a character getting emotional - you are likely to be using your own real emotions to physrep that. Those don't always go away just because you have stopped playing the character. So be gentle with yourself for how you feel for the next few days, and watch out for any responses that come from the character and not you. This is called "bleed" and its normal, basically everyone gets it. But you might feel, eg, weirdly close to or angry with a player or fellow crewmember, or like you've let people down or similar. If that happens it is worth pausing on the reaction and checking where it comes from before acting on it. In the same way that while your kit isn't actually covered in blood you still need to put it round the wash - you weren't actually in a life or death situation with your mates but your brain might need a gentle clean up as if you were.

#process hack #larp #larp accessibility #accessibility #larphacks #crewing #larp crewing #packing list

[wearequeer-andwearehere]

I am so sorry if this may sound ignorant (I have been doing online school for about 3 years now and havent really been around many people my age for a while so I don't know if this plays into my question or not)

I have 2 questions

1. I use the pronouns she/her (it's just what I have always been comfortable with) but I prefer to were more masc or boy stereotypical clothing I guess you could say. Now I do like girl clothes but not as much. I think im just confused if it's a body thing or a gender thing because I like masc clothes so much since they just fit my body better I definitely feel more comfortable in them, but I also like to wear fem presenting clothes as well that may be more form fitting. And you know sometimes I want to put on a suit and strut around in it and sometimes I want to put on a dress it just depends.

2. I am very confused about my sexuality lol. I don't think I realized people could even be more than what society had already deemed as normal and around the age I would have probably began to explore my sexuality covid hit and everything went online. (For reference I am about to turn 16 and would have been 13 when the pandemic hit) I feel the same when I see an attractive female as I would an attractive male (this goes for anyone really if I find them attractive I can feel attraction to them, whether it's a platonic, romantic, or sexual attraction genuinely don't know) I also am fine reading sex scenes but whenever people talk about it in person or if I watch it on tv that's when I get uncomfy and I genuinely can't see myself having sex with someone (idk if that will change or not) but im fine with seeing myself being in a relationship and cuddling expressing my love for a person and sometimes kissing (it depends)

I am so sorry that this was sooo long and all over the place my brain is all messy when I don't plan things out before I write or say anything, and you don't have to answer of course this was just me ranting about how I have no clear thoughts as to who I am yet and it feels good to get it off my chest lt even if you don't answer or even see this.

Thank you genuinely it feels good to talk.

No need to apologise!! I’m here for u :] That’s good, I’m glad writing this ask helped you feel better—try and write shit down sometimes, even if it’s just hastily typed into a google doc and immediately deleted. Shit’s magic honestly.

Preferring or liking masculine clothing doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re transgender. Like obviously it’s a possibility but it’s not like, oh I like pants instead of skirts that means I’m a guy!! You could be trans or you could just be a girl who likes different types of clothing.

My advice is like, don’t sweat it too much, and just do what makes you happy. If you like masculine clothing, fucking go for it!!! I’m sure you’ll slay 100%!! If you wanna wear form fitting stuff, go for that too!! Just. Do what makes you feel like yourself, and do what makes you feel happy, don’t worry about labels and am-i-trans-am-i-cis and all that, kay? Just Vibe!!!!!!

I’d suggest you consider mspec labels, which means attraction to multiple genders, labels like bisexual and pansexual, or just plain old bi and pan might be good for you!!

You can look into the asexual spectrum, which is basically all sexualities that aren’t like 100% allosexual (allosexual means like. most of the population and how they experience sexual attraction.)

Yes, attraction can be confusing. And yes, it’s possible the stuff you feel might change. Maybe you’ll feel sexual attraction someday, or maybe you never will!!

But go with what you like *now.* If bi feels good, go for bi! If asexual feels good, go for it. If you wanna change it later, that’s okay!!

I’m gonna give you my standard new shoe advice—yknow when you have rlly shitty old shoes but you’re used to them, and when you get new shoes you’re like wtf these are really weird, but then you eventually realise they’re much more comfy and you were just used to the shitty old ones?

New labels can be kind of like that. So like, if u try a label and it feels Weird, ask yourself if the weird is a “this is the wrong shoe size” weird or a “i need to break this shoe in” weird.

Hope I could help you out!! Sending my love, and I hope you find what makes you feel happy and feel like yourself!! Have an amazing day <333

#ask #helping out a questioning person

[casspurrjoybell-20]

Sky Twizzlers - Chapter 5a

*Warning Adult Content*

Paranoid Much? - Part 1 - Aaron -

No, a night, however brief it was seeing as we'd stayed up so late, of sleep did nothing to ease my paranoia. Aubrey and I passed out quickly once we laid down in Evander's bed.  It was just as comfortable as I'd imagined. It also helped that I had a natural heater that quickly lulled me to sleep and, of course, the exhaustion from the day had to catch up to me eventually. The nymph snuggled up to me the entire night. 

When I woke up, our legs were intertwined and his head was on my chest, his arm thrown over my body. After reaching over to check my phone, I noticed that I had a few missed calls from Wren. Made sense; it was almost noon. I quickly redialed his number, pressing the phone to my ear as I stared up at the ceiling from my position on the bed, still trapped by my mate.

"Hey, are you okay?" Wren asked the moment he picked up.

"I'm fine," I said. 

"I met with my mates and we went... the dark haired-stranger’s apartment."

I should probably introduce their names to Wren but that could come at a slightly later date. It only mattered that he understood what I was saying, especially since I had to keep my voice low, Aubrey was still sound asleep on top of me.

"Good," he sighed. 

"Well, the mission was a semi-success. We rescued all the captives, but we weren't able to get anyone in charge."

"Hopefully the captives can give as much information as possible."

"Yeah... oh..." the line went silent for a moment before he came back again and said, 

"Erin wants to talk with you."

I sighed. Of course, he would. Wren no doubt told him that I found my mates and now he wants to either tease me about it, question me, or do both. 

‘Probably both.’ 

"Put him on."

"Aaron, why didn't you tell me you found your mates? I feel like I've been blindsided," Erin complained the moment he was handed the phone.

‘Drama queen.’ 

"I had more important things on my mind than telling you about my mates, like... oh, I don't know... my mates."

"That's no excuse. I'm your best friend," he countered as if that justified anything.

"Well, I'm telling you now, right?" I pointed out.

He hummed and I could practically see the nod behind it. 

"So, tell me. What are they like? Wren said you had two, which, by the way, is so cool."

"They're nice," I stated, not sure what else to say.

What more could I say? I barely knew them. Not to mention, I still felt a bit on edge when it came to Evander. Aubrey and I had gotten along so well right from the beginning but Evander was so... closed off. And I wasn't nearly as open as Aubrey was, so breaking past Evander's walls seemed even harder. Or maybe they were mine...

"That's it? 'They're nice?' You gotta' give me more than that, man."

“You sound like Ryder," I pointed it out, scrunching up my nose.

Erin laughed loudly. 

"Well, you've been so active in this attacking thing and Wren is only around for a few days at a time, so Ryder and Marie are pretty much my only company."

I hummed. It was nice knowing that Wren was mentioned. I'd worried they'd still be awkward I hadn't kept much track of their relationship but they seemed to be doing fine. I was glad. Even if Wren wasn't our packmate anymore, he was still our close friend. A soft groan broke me from my trail of thoughts. I looked down as Aubrey shifted around before his eyes blinked open. He looked up at me with hooded green-brown eyes, a questioning look on his face. 

"Aaron?" he asked, his voice quiet from sleep. 

"Who are you talking to?"

"My packmates," I answered, pulling away from the phone so Erin wouldn't hear and try to mess with me.

‘Didn't work’.

"Aaron... who's that? Introduce me," he said.

"I think I'll pass for now," I snorted.

‘Ryder was really rubbing off on him... though he was always an idiot. Ryder didn't need to influence anything on that front.’

"You're so cruel, sometimes," he said. 

"Fine. I'll wait until you're back to demand introductions. When are you coming back?"

"Hopefully soon. I'll call back to confirm when," I responded.

"Okay. I'll leave you to it, then," he went silent but didn't hang up, then cheekily added... 

"I know you must be eager to get it on with your mates."

"Erin," I snapped but he hung up after laughing again.

I wanted to let out my frustrations with that idiot through a groan but luckily held it in. Erin's final words kind of pissed me off but how was he to know that sex was the last thing on my mind? He didn't know about... that.

‘You can barely admit it in your own thoughts. How pathetic is that, Aaron?’

"What's happening soon?" Aubrey asked me once I'd put my phone down.

He sat up and my heart melted at how cute he looked. Evander's shirt was sliding off his thin shoulder and his brown curls were all messy from sleep. I reached up before I could stop myself and tried to smooth down the loose curls but they refused to stay tamed. Aubrey hummed, leaning into my hand when I settled for petting his head.

"We need to head to my home base at some point. Check in, discuss the mission and whatnot," I finally answered.

Aubrey peeked his eyes open, as they had been previously closed, to look at me carefully. 

"How soon?"

I shrugged. 

"Eh, we're not in that much of a rush. Maybe later today? Tomorrow? They understand we all just got together and would probably want some time to figure it out."

The nymph nodded. He then laid back down, resting his head on my chest and closing his eyes again with a tired hum.

 "I've never slept so well before."

"Me neither," I admitted.

We laid there for a bit, silently enjoying each other's company, when I heard the stairs creak. Aubrey must not have heard because he didn't open his eyes again. I watched as Evander emerged, already dressed in new clothes. When he did that, I had no clue. 

"Good morning," he greeted.

"Morning," I answered, feeling awkward all of a sudden.

"I heard that you have to leave soon," he commented, moving to sit down at the end of the bed... farthest away from me.

‘Maybe his option to sit there had nothing to do with you, Aaron. Stop over-thinking everything.’

"We do, yeah," I said, emphasizing the first word. 

"Wherever I go, I want my mates to join me. Besides, Aubrey might be able to help us."

At the mention of his name, my mate sat up again and looked at me. 

"Help with what?"

"We need more information. Since you lived in that place for so long, I'm sure there are some things you've heard before, maybe seen. Any information at all would help us a bunch," I explained.

Aubrey nodded, offering a small smile. 

"Yeah, I'd love to help."

"Awesome," I said, returning the smile.

"We can go tomorrow," Evander commented, breaking the small moment Aubrey and I seemed to be having, it was very easy to get lost in his smile.

I wanted to question why we couldn't go today but I kept my mouth closed. He'd probably suggested tomorrow to remain cautious, we did just ransack a cult slave-trade or whatever they wanted to call it.

"So, what should we do today?" Aubrey asked, looking between the both of us excitedly.

"I don't really care, so long as we stay safe," I answered with a shrug.

Evander watched my movement before slowly standing up. 

"I think that, for now, I should make some breakfast for the both of you. Feel free to use my bathroom to shower and whatnot."

He left after that. Curt and efficient. I didn't get what his problem was. It felt like he was barely even trying to get to know us. Yeah, it'd been only a day, not even that but still. Was he going to be this dry the entirety of our relationship? 

T’hat didn't exactly sound fun.’

[read-watch-listen-17]

RHAPSODIC (THE BARGAINER SERIES 1)

SPOILERS

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Wow, that’s one way to start a book. 😳

“That is one dead man” 🤣 then he goes on to say he’s not quite dead and it reminds me of The Princess Bride. 🤣🤣🤣❤️❤️❤️

Awww he doesn’t deal with minors. Good to know he has at least one line he won’t cross. Awww and then he does it for her anyway.

I get the feeling he knows something about her. Besides the fact that she’s part Siren.

322 unpaid favors! 😳😳😳 What the hell did she ask him for?!

“One day I won’t give you a choice.” Oooooo, ominous, foreshadowing. I like it. I also get the feeling that he won’t give her a choice because he already knows what he needs her for.

🤣 traded a bead for sobriety. I mean if she drinks in moderation I bet she’d be fine.

🤣 see, he even admitted it himself.

Okay, if she hadn’t already dumped Eli’s ass this is where I’d be screaming for her to do it. Awww he rescued her.🥰

Interesting. Okay, so she’s asked him for 322 favors, but he can pick and choose how many beads a favor costs and how many beads he cashes in for what he asks her to do. So my question right now is, did he choose to give her a bead for every little thing he did for her on purpose so he had a lot to cash in later on? Because she even mentions that he normally doesn’t let anyone get more than like 3 or 4 and she has an obscene amount more than that. Did he have an alternative motive for allowing her to collect so many beads?

It sounds like they hung out a lot during her first year at the academy, haven’t quite gotten to when things ended, but she wracked up her 322 beads in a year if I’m understanding so far. And now after 7 years he’s back to collect, and I get the feeling the first few were just to warm up and that the big ask, at least one is going to be to help him solve what’s happening in his kingdom.

The past makes me feel like she had a crush on him, obvious she even admits it, but it also seems like he enjoys being around her. I’m wondering why.

“Who do I have to hurt?” Awwww 🥰🥰🥰, he’s gonna bust someone’s balls for hurting her

Awwww he comforted her AND he went after the guy who abused her. 

WHAT DID THE PIXIE SAY?!?!?! I NEED TO KNOW!!! Wait…they perched on the crown of her head. Is that hinting that the pixies asked if she was going to be his queen?!

Also does he call her cherub because she was a minor the first time they met? I can’t think of another explanation. At least not yet.

Thief of Souls, sounds ominous, but would explain the catatonic like state of the babies and women. At least I think it would. Only afraid of Des, but only because he’s not unstoppable yet. 🤔🤔🤔

Well that wasn’t at all creepy. So, the children are all connected. The Thief of Souls now wants Callie, and somehow she’s been taken to him? Not sure yet.

Awww he didn’t want her to stop fighting 🥰🥰❤️❤️

Okay so it was just her mind that went to the Thief of Souls. Guy with antlers is a clue for Des? Also he seems very, like VERY protective, maybe possessive of her right now. Which gets me thinking about other books I’ve read where the male acts like that when the girl is his mate. So I’m thinking they’re this worlds version of mates. I’m super glad that he reigned in his anger to make the wise decision to take her home instead of forcing her to stay.

Do Sirens have feathers? The only ones I’ve ever heard about were always in the water and feathers wouldn’t make sense. So what’s with the feathers? Unless there’s something else to her, and I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s something even she doesn’t know since she doesn’t know who her father is.

Also Des mentions she’s been under his protection for a very long time. So even after he left her she was under his protection? He cares SOOOO MUCH!

Okay so somehow they have a deeper connection if he can sense her nightmare. Or maybe it’s because he’s the King of night and that includes dreams/nightmares. 🤔🤔🤔

Ummm, is this hundred-thou client Temper is talking about, possibly the Thief of Souls trying to get to Callie???

OH. MY. GOD. He’s too much. I don’t think I can take any more adorableness from him. He felt like his soul was ripped in two 😭😭😭, and the 7 years were a nightmare. Then the thing he has always wanted to do with her is finish the Harry Potter movies! 🥰🥰🥰 He calls her love. This whole scene just makes my heart giddy. ❤️🥰❤️🥰❤️🥰❤️

Not me imagining later on when Des will make that oath to Callie and make her his queen. 🥰🥰

Well that wasn’t creepy or anything 😅😅😳😳

Awwww he kept sketching her, wait no go back, ignore the knocking, keep looking at the sketches, nooooooo ❤️

Awww he asked her to take him to the ball 🥰🥰

How the hell did Eli find her?

Okay I don’t hate him as much now.

What’s with the nod and the staring at the wings and the I didn’t know the situation? WHAT SITUATION? WHAT DIDN’T HE KNOW?

OH. MY. GOD! How are they betrothed? Like when did that happen? 

OH, OH DAMN. Not betrothed, soul mates. Does that count as me being right? And is it soul mates from his side or from both sides? Is that why she’s so comfortable with him even though he’s “scary”?

So, did he know eight years ago when he started hanging out with her that she was his soul mate? Is that WHY he did it? Because he admits that he couldn’t stay away. Why did he look horrified and in wonder after she said the binding thing? Does that have anything to do with the soul mates part?

Well, damn. If she hadn’t made that final wish maybe they would’ve gotten together sooner. Her wish and his magic kept them apart for 7 years as payment for the wish to come true even though they were already soulmates, and he knew it the whole damn time, but he didn’t want to force her. Where have I heard that before?

And just as everything is right in love land the other shoe drops. Is he the Thief of Souls or just the guy trying to get her to work for him? Des is gonna be so pissed when he finds out she’s be napped. That guy’s gonna be in big trouble.

“Fuckity fuck” Funny, that’s exactly what I was thinking. The King of Fauna is behind all of this? Really? I guess he is mad.

He is the Thief of Souls. He’s gross. I’m curious to find out why his magic either isn’t working on Callie or working differently on her

Holy shit! She’s got claws, scales, and wings now?!

YAY!! Des found her!!

Well shit. He aint gonna be in the next book.

The other women didn’t wake up. Interesting. Does that mean that the King of Fauna was only a henchman and that the big bad is still out there?

More importantly why did it take Des so long to find her? She literally had a nightmare of the antler guy who I’m assuming Des knew was the King of Fauna so why was that not the first place he went to find her? 🤔🤔🤔

Anyway on to book 2!

#the bargainer series #rhapsodic #book 1 #laura thalassa #callypso #callie #the bargainer #desmond #des #road to 100 #july reads 2022 #45/100 #thief of souls

[musecaravan-info]

About Me

I’m actually not all that comfortable sharing stuff about myself with strangers on the internet.  I come from a generation where we were taught that wasn’t a good idea (and I still prescribe to that.)  

If you need a name to call me, Mira is fine.  So is Jo, I guess.  But I’ll answer to ‘Hey there, you!’

Just to give you a teeny bit of info:

I’m old - well, older than most of you, at least.  If that weirds you out, jump ship NOW.  I don’t have the time (or the grace) to deal with people who can’t handle having friends that aren’t the same age they are.

I’m a librarian by trade (yes, I have a Masters degree and everything) and a writer by hobby.

I like fantasy (especially urban), and anime, and cartoons, and audiobooks, and casual gaming, and all kinds of music.

Now that you know as much as any stranger really has a right to know - let’s cover a few RP-related things.  These are also in the guidelines, but because these are probably the ‘deal-breaker’ type things, it can’t hurt to go over them more than once (and in more detail.)

These are good ways to decide if we’ll work well as partners.

My replies are slower than dirt.  No, really.  While I try to keep it to about 3-4 months between, I’ve been known to go 6-9 months.  I’m a ‘slow burn’ kind of gal.  If you want to stick with me for that, then awesome.  If not, I understand.

I am not a fan of constantly dropped threads.  I don’t mind a thread that takes YEARS to finish, but if we are ALWAYS starting things and you are always dropping them, then I will eventually stop starting things with you.  It’s that simple.  My time is limited (which is WHY it takes me so long to reply) and if you’re consistently dropping our threads and our replies never go anywhere, then you’re wasting my time.  I know that sounds harsh, but I’m tired of having it happen.  If you do this, and you have partners that don’t care, then I’m glad for you.  However, I DO care and we aren’t going to make good partners.

I rarely (if ever) approach first anymore.  This really only applies to people I haven’t written with yet.  No, I’m not shy or anxious or whatever.  I’m just tired of approaching people and having them act like they want to RP, and then having them drop the thread two replies in (or never replying at all.)  I’m basically tired of people saying yes because they’re afraid to say no.  If YOU ask ME, then, when I say yes, I know we’re both interested in doing something together.

I need partners who can COMMNUNICATE with me.  If you’re too scared or anxious or shy (or whatever) to do that, then we probably won’t make good partners.  I’ve been ghosted in the past by a partner who was too afraid of her own shadow to have an adult conversation, and I’m not interested in being in that situation again.  I am an understanding and down-to-earth person, and if you treat me with respect, I will offer you the same in return no matter what we’re talking about.

I don’t like being constantly passed over.  If you’re the kind of RPer who’s always playing favorites, then we’re not going to make good partners.  And I’m not talking an ‘every now and then’ sort of thing.  I get that some days you just want to write that one thing.  Or some days the short stuff is easy and the long stuff is hard.  I’m talking about if we’ve got RPs going and you reply EVERY day to other people, but ALL of our threads sit on your back-burner for months at a time collecting dust.  That’s not okay with me.  Again - this is tied to some poor treatment I’ve received in the past.  I put up with it back then because I thought the person in question was a friend who would talk to me if there was an actual issue.  Turns out she wasn’t a friend.  She was just a coward.  I refuse to put myself in a similar situation again.  Treat me this way on a regular basis and I will drop our threads and not look back.

I’m not very chatty.  Not in real life and not online.  If you talk to me, then I will talk back.  I will never intentionally ignore you.  And I promise you’re not being annoying or a burden or anything like that.  I like hearing from people, I’m just crap when it comes to instigating conversations.  I rarely go out of my way to have non-RP related conversations with people.  I’m sorry; it’s just how I am.  :(  

I know these things may make me seem bitchy and stand-offish.  I can’t really help that.  I’m sorry.  :(  I’m just tired of dealing with issues related to these things over and over again.  If I say it in the beginning, then we can both avoid wasting each others’ time.  If you don’t like any or all of what you see here, then it just means I’ve saved us both a lot of time and frustration.  If you think you’re okay with all of the above, then please proceed to my guidelines to learn more.  :)

Also, please be aware - if you’re a current partner and your anxiety has you worried that you might be doing something from the above list, please don’t worry.  <3  If you were (and it was bothering me) I would politely say something.  I believe 100% in communication, and if something is wrong I’ll come talk to you about it.  If I haven’t said anything, you’re fine - I promise.  :)  If you’re still worried about it, and would like to come talk to me, please do!  Communication goes both ways, and I’m here to listen and to reassure as best I can.

Return to Mobile Links

[cjsinkythoughts]

The Conversation

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Word Count: 7661 (Don’t come at me - you guys asked for it)

Warnings: !FATWS Spoilers!, Cursing, Fluff, Feelings, I Dunno What Else, This One’s Pretty Chill, Except The Ending, But You’ll See When You Get There

A/N: Here it is! I was hesitant about posting it because that means we’re getting closer to the end and I’m such a nostalgic bitch! I’m definitely gonna cry next week when the last episode comes out! Anyways, I’ve got a few things to talk about:

I think this is one of the most important chapters I’ve written and I’m excited to see your reactions to it. It is longer, but you guys asked for that, so you got it! Also, I’m loving the Asks, Comments, and Reblogs. I try to respond to all of them. I have work in a little bit, so I won’t be able to until after, but I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. Ask me anything; about my series, the show, any of the movies, personal stuff, I really don’t care. If you’re not comfortable, that’s totally fine! Every like means so much to me!

I know it’s not the end yet - we’ve got one more episode and a list of One Shots to get through - but there’s a definite feeling of this series coming to an end, and I just want to thank you all for the support and love you’ve been giving it! I’ve really enjoyed writing these characters and this story! It’s very, very special to me and I’m glad I’ve been able to share it with you lovely people!

On that note, be kind to yourselves and others! Thank you again for reading! Excuse any mistakes - this isn’t beta’d! Enjoy and stay tuned!

FATWS Masterlist

cjsinkythoughts Masterlist

!SPOILERS UNDER CUT! (Sorry for the gifs I just love them so much and he’s so pretty and this part is technically two parts so...you get four!)

“Louisiana.” Bucky hummed, looking around the airport.

You rolled your eyes. “You’re not gonna find anything interesting about Louisiana in here, doofus. Let’s call an Uber.”

“An Ooper? What the hell is an Ooper?”

You giggled, shaking your head and grabbing his hand and pulling him towards the luggage carousel. “Uber. It’s like…a taxi service. But there’s an app on your phone to get a driver instead of waiting for one on the street.”

“Oh.” He blinked, tilting his head. “That’s…helpful.”

You laughed again, stopping in front of Carousel 3, where your flight from New York was assigned. You went back to New York to grab a bag with clean clothes and other necessities, along with taking a real shower for once. It was nice to be back in the States, as much as you loved traveling. It’d been a crazy few weeks and you were ready to just relax.

“Do you think there were any problems with Sammy’s present?”

Bucky shook his head. “Nah. Especially considering they know who we are.”

You snickered at his slight grumble. They had had…problems at the other two airports - first the one in Sokovia then JFK in New York - considering Bucky’s entire arm was metal. It’d taken a full hour before they actually let you go, and by that time they had to give you a new plane because yours had left.

“Seriously. Who else has a fucking metal arm and has 1917 listed as their birth year on their Driver’s License?” You giggled again. That was also true. They thought he was messing with them. It wasn’t until you stepped in a few minutes after they asked Bucky to step to the side, seeing Bucky get frustrated, that they realized Bucky wasn’t pulling their legs.

“Well, we’re here now and that’s all that matters.”

He nodded in agreement, watching for your bags, his hand finding yours when he realized how many people there were. “Do you know where he lives? I didn’t even think about it.”

“Yeah, don’t worry. He invited me over once. I declined, but I saved the address.”

“He…invited you over?” Bucky frowned.

You gave him a look. “I’m sure he invited you, too. You just never checked his texts.”

He licked his lips, tilting his head. “Yeah, no, I know, but I mean…why didn’t you go? Weren’t you two just talking about how you wanted to meet his nephews the other day?”

“Yeah, but I had gotten a tip on Wanda at the time and I didn’t want to miss the chance that she was there. He told me it was fine. I still felt really bad. I could tell he was a bit disappointed. I think it was one of the boys’ birthdays. Or something. I don’t remember. Is that bad? Yeah, probably. I really should remember. Maybe I should keep track of birthdays on my calendar or something.”

“Doll.” You looked up to find him giving you a magnificent smile, teeth and all. “You’re rambling.”

“Oh. Am I? Sorry. I didn’t realize.”

He shook his head quickly, squeezing your hand. “Don’t apologize. It’s cute. I’m just not used to you talking so much. You kinda did on the phone sometimes.”

You shrugged, pushing down the heat crawling up your neck at his words. “I rambled a lot to Steve.”

“Oh.”

His face fell, making you scrunch your eyebrows up in confusion, nudging him slightly to grin at him. “It’s nice to have someone to ramble to again, though.” There was that smile again. You were stopped from saying anything more when you noticed some kids pointing and chattering excitedly at a gleaming silver box coming around the corner on the conveyor belt. “There it is.”

He looked over his shoulder, dropping your hand and stepping over to grab it, lifting it effortlessly. You didn’t know what was in it or how heavy it was, but you were sure it felt like a feather to him.

“Alright. Got our bag, sweetheart?” You lifted up the duffle in answer and he jerked his head towards the doors. “Let’s get outta here, then. Call that Booper or whatever.”

“U-B-E-R! Ub-er!” You threw your hands up, following him as he started walking towards the exit. “What’s so hard about it?!”

He just gave you a little smirk over his shoulder.

***************

Bucky kept asking the Uber driver questions about his job. The guy was super nice and patient the whole time, a thick southern accent lacing his answers. Southern hospitality was no joke and apparently had no limit as Bucky asked about his experiences, listening intently and telling him his own stories of taxi drivers in NYC.

When you got to Sam’s sister’s house, Bucky, being Bucky, tipped the driver half of what you paid for the ride, thanking him for his time and energy, before getting out.

“You’re so adorable, you know that?” You teased him as you stepped up the porch stairs and knocked on the door.

He rolled his eyes, a tint of pink dusting across his cheeks. “He was nice.”

You hummed at his defense, the smile never leaving your features. After a moment, Bucky raised his fist to knock again. “Jesus Christ! Don’t fucking knock their door down!” You grabbed his wrist and lowered it.

“Sorry. I forget sometimes.” Bucky informed you absentmindedly,  tilting his head to peek in the window. “I don’t think anyone’s home.”

“They’re probably at the docks, then.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow. “The docks?”

You nodded, gesturing for him to follow you. “Yeah. They have a boat, remember? He talked about it last week.”

“Oh right. The one he’s trying to convince his sister not to sell.”

“Yeah.” You confirmed. “I’m pretty sure it’s that way. I don’t know how far, but we can call the Uber back-”

Bucky scrunched up his face and shook his head. “Nah. I don’t wanna bother him again. We can walk.”

You gave him an incredulous look. “It’s literally his job to drive people around.”

“Well, yeah, but what if he’s got other people to drive?”

You lifted his metal knuckles to your lips. “Trust me, Buck, I’m sure he’d rather drive you than anyone else.”

“Thank you?”

Swinging your now linked hands, you gave a firm nod, letting him know it was, in fact, a compliment. “You are so very welcome.”

The walk was a lot longer than you thought it was, and you ended up on Bucky’s back after he kept complaining about how you “shouldn’t be walking this long” and you were “injured” and you “needed rest’”. You’re not sure how a shoulder wound affected your ability to walk, but you relented and let him carry you the rest of the way to stop his whining.

“You forget, you did pull your thigh.”

“That was, like, three weeks ago! Yeesh!”

You finally got to the docks, which were bustling with people. Bucky set you down and raised an eyebrow which you shrugged in reply to, before heading over to where you spotted Sam with a few other older men.

“How do we get it off the truck?” You heard Sam ask, pointing to a large boat engine part in the bed of a beaten up truck. Scoffing as Bucky lifted it up without breaking a sweat, you leaned against the truck. Bucky grunted and set it down, looking at Sam.

“You’re welcome.” What a punk. “Just dropping this off.” Bucky lifted the case and set it where the engine was previously, Sam coming to stand on the opposite side of the truck as you. “You can sign for it and I’ll go.” You snorted, shaking your head, making Bucky shove your shoulder - the uninjured one - playfully. “I called in a favor from the Wakandans.”

Sam looked at you curiously. You shrugged and shook your head. “Don’t look at me, Sammy. He wouldn’t tell me what it is. He’s all hushy hushy about it until you say so.”

Before Sam could reply, there was a squeak and hissing over at the boat where steam was coming from a few pipes.

“Sam!” You knew that was Sarah from pictures Sam showed you. You stayed up by the truck, pulling yourself onto the bed while Sam tried fixing the pipe, Bucky butting in to show him how to do it properly.

“Why didn’t you use the metal arm?”

You saw Bucky lift up said metallic limb. “Well…I don’t always think of it immediately. I’m-I’m right handed.” Letting out a laugh, Bucky turned around and scowled teasingly at you. “And what’re you laughing at?!”

“Nothing!”

“Well then get your ass over here!”

You rolled your eyes, hopping down from the truck as Bucky asked if Sam wanted help with the boat. You leaned against a wooden post, grinning when Sam looked at you.

“I don’t have any plans.”

Sam gave a small smile, jerking his head back. “Yeah.”

You jumped down onto the boat to follow him, looking over your shoulder and stopping with an amused eyebrow raised as Bucky introduced himself to Sarah. “I’m Bucky.”

“Ah…Sarah.”

“Sarah.” Bucky repeated her name, before walking towards you, a grin still on his lips.

“Careful, Barnes. That playboy Steve warned me about is coming out.” You nudged him with a smirk, ignoring the feeling of your stomach dropping.

He rolled his eyes, kissing your head as he passed you and Sam to go where Sam was gesturing. “Don’t worry, Y/N. You’re still my doll.”

Sam raised an eyebrow, falling into step besides you and lowering his voice. “Conversation?”

“Hasn’t happened.” You informed him through clenched teeth as he groaned.

Sam gave you a list of chores that needed to be done to clean up the boat, giving you a quick tour and letting you know where all the tools needed where. You set to work immediately.

Sanding down, replacing old parts, cleaning, polishing and painting over the things that didn’t need replacing. They didn’t let you do any heavy lifting because of your stupid shoulder, but you were still able to help.

Sam had turned on some music for you to listen to, so you danced around the boat while cleaning. Turning your head when you felt a pair of eyes on you, you smiled when Bucky snapped his head back down to the wood he was sanding down.

“Gonna dance, Barnes?”

He looked back over, shaking his head. “Nah. I’m good watching you.”

Rolling your eyes, you got back to work, continuing to bop to the music, fully aware that he was watching you now.

A little while later, you were repainting the edges of the boat orange, when you looked over and noticed Bucky playing around with a paint scraper…sitting right on the edge that you had just finished repainting a few minutes ago.

“Buck!”

He looked over, eyebrows raised. “Yeah?”

You bit your lip, trying to hold back your mischievous grin. Shaking your head, you waved dismissively. “Never mind!”

He gave you a confused sort of pout, before shrugging and continuing to fidget with the tool. It wasn’t until later when he got up to help Sam tear the metal plating off the edge that it came to light with Sam chuckling and raising an eyebrow.

“Sit in something there, Barnes?”

“What?”

Bucky craned his neck back, eyes widening when he saw the orange paint on his ass, contrasting with his jeans. You let out a cackle and he whipped towards you, pointing at you accusingly, although the small uptick of his lips let you know he wasn’t really mad.

“Y/N!”

“No, no, no!” You laughed, sprinting across the deck, shrieking when he grabbed your waist and spun you around. You gasped when he grabbed a paint brush and painted an orange stripe right down the front of your shirt. “James!”

“Justice, sweetheart.” He breathed in your ear with a chuckle.

You shook your head, wiggling out of his hold. “This is a nice shirt!”

“You should’ve thought about that before.” He smirked, crossing his arms. Your eyes caught sight of Sam behind him, who raised an eyebrow and the bucket of paint he was holding. You nodded with a little giggle, making Bucky’s eyes narrow. “What’s so funny over there, do - holy shit!

You guffawed as orange paint dripped down his head, Sam standing innocently behind him with the now empty bucket behind his back. “Samuel!”

“Oops?”

“I’m gonna kill you!”

“Try me old man!”

“Fuck!

“Doll!”

“Oh my God!”

Paint, orange and white since those were the only cans they had out, flew across the deck, paint brushes being used like fencing swords.

You found out too late that wet paint was a little bit slippery and you slid on a huge puddle, sending you, not onto the ground below, but over the side of the edge into the water. 

“Doll!”

“Cher, you good?!” 

The three of you looked at each other, stunned for a moment, before bursting into fits of laughter and you nodded. “I’m good!”

The boys helped you get back up onto the dock, Sarah appearing with towels she conjured up out of thin air. “Let’s get you into dry clothes. Do you have-?”

“We’ve got some. We got a bag.” You told her with a grin, facing the guys. “You two should clean up some, too. Sammy, you’ve got a little something right there.” You pointed to your cheek, his own having a giant white splotch from his temple to his jaw. “And Buck?” You sniggered, gesturing to the whole of him. “You’ve got a lotta something right there.” 

“Ha. Ha.” He looked down. His top was practically tiger print, drenched in orange with white here and there, and his ass still orange as well. His hair, which had been plastered to his forehead, was starting to dry now, and it only made you laugh some more thinking about what a pain it’d be to get it out. For him, at least.

“God. Can’t even have a relaxing day on the boat with you two.” Sam jested once you finished up and joined him and Bucky, who had just finished dumping out some water buckets. Bucky had changed his shirt and it looked like they tried wiping their faces, but Sam still had small lines of white down his face. “How ‘bout a couple of drinks? Surely you can’t ruin that too.”

“Ruin?” You gasped in mock offence. “Sammy! I just made the day more…interesting.”

Sam chuckled, ruffling Bucky’s hair, which still had orange streaks in it. “Let’s go get some beers.”

************

You chatted for a bit, mainly you and Sam with you asking how Sarah and the boys were while Bucky with your legs in his lap, just listening to you two and sipping at his bottle. You had his hand in your own lap, wiping it down with a rag due to the paint that got on it.

“You’re lucky this is vibranium, you know.” You commented off handedly. “If it was your other one, it’d definitely get stained.”

“And who’s fault is that?” Bucky shot back with a teasing grin.

“Sammy’s.”

Sam spluttered. “Wh-what?! You started it!” You laughed, shaking your head.

Falling into a comfortable silence with just the water and birds chirping as your soundtrack, you downed the rest of your drink, which Bucky took as finished. “Well,” you moved your legs to let him stand up. He leaned forwards to clink his bottle against Sam’s and you stood up and stretched. “Gotta catch our flight tomorrow. Get a hotel room for the night.” Sam gave you a look to which you rolled your eyes at as Bucky set down his bottle and grabbed his jacket. “Crash, you know?”

“So you’re just gonna set me up like that, huh?”

“Well I don’t wanna make it weird for your family.”

“Just stay here.” You laughed as Sam babbled on about how nice the people were here, grabbing the jacket Bucky handed to you. It was getting a bit chilly from the breeze on the water and the sun going down. Plus, that water was cold.

“But don’t flirt with my sister.”

You cackled at Bucky’s face, that turned serious, his head shaking. “No.”

“‘Cause if you do I’ll have Carlos cut you up and feed you to the fish.”

“Can’t hold back the dog, Wilson. It’s been stuck in a kennel too long.”

Bucky turned to you, grabbing your jaw and squishing your cheeks together. “You know what? You need to shush. You’ve been snippy all day.”

You just smiled as innocently as you could with your lips being held by his metal fingers. “You’re too fun to mess with.”

He pecked your nose. “As long as I’m the only one you’re messing with. I’ll be right back.” He let you go and spun around, maneuvering around the boat in a way only a trained assassin could do.

“Oh my God, please! Please just put me out of my fucking misery! You’re killing me, cher.”

“What?” You gaped at him.

“Don’t act innocent!” Sam huffed, giving you a pointed look. “If I have to watch you two make googly eyes at you one more fucking day with neither of you doing anything about it-”

You rolled your eyes. “Oh come on, Sammy-”

“Don’t ‘come on, Sammy’ me! And don’t come at me with that ‘he doesn’t like me back’ bullshit. If you think for a second that boy wouldn’t follow you to the depths of the fucking ocean, you’re blind as a bat, woman.”

You shrugged, pushing up the sleeves of Bucky’s too big jacket. “It just…hasn’t come up.”

He deadpanned, shaking his head and standing up. “That’s it. I’m done. You two are driving me insane. I’m gonna lock you in a room until you have the conversation that needs to be had the next time either of you does something stupid.”

“Yikes. That’s gonna be quick.” At his look, your smile dropped and you nodded. “Okay, okay. I’ll…I’ll bring it up later.”

“Tomorrow or nothing.”

“Sam-”

Sam tilted his head, brow creasing. “Is it still Steve? Is that what this is still about? Because he’s gone, and he’s been gone and you need to get over it-”

“No. It’s not…” You sighed. “It clicked the other day. When we were hanging out. Steve left and, yeah, I might always love him, but Bucky…God…I love Bucky, Sam.”

The man grinned proudly. “I’m glad to finally hear you admit it. So what’s the problem?”

“It’s still complicated, right? I mean…he’s his best friend and I’ve never dealt with stuff like this before and-”

Sam’s smile dropped and he groaned again. “Imma head out. I can’t take this. Dumbass and dumberass. I swear to God.” You sniggered a bit as he grumbled, walking towards the ramp to climb off the boat, just as Bucky reappeared.

“Hey-”

“Nope! Not right now, Barnes! I can’t handle it! I can’t!”

Bucky gave you a weird look. “What’d you do?”

You chuckled, shaking your head. “Nothing.”

“Well, c’mon, doll. Sarah said she’s gonna make gumbo for us, whatever that is.” He held out his hand as you walked over. 

“You’re such a city boy.” You teased lightly, taking his hand and letting him help you pull you onto the dock. You shoved the sleeves of his jackets up again since they slipped from the first time. “Let’s go get some dinner. I’m starving.”

******************

“We have the couch and a mattress we can pull out, I just have to make Sam get it from the attic-”

“That’s alright. The couch is fine.” Bucky waved dismissively while you nodded in agreement.

Sarah raised an eyebrow at you two. “For both of you?”

You blinked, exchanging a look with Bucky, before shrugging and turning back to her. “Yeah.”

“Don’t fight it, Sarah.” Sam peeked out from the hall. “They’ve got a weird relationship.” You stuck your tongue out at the man while Bucky rolled his eyes, dropping your duffle bag by the couch. “How mature, Y/N.” Sam mimicked your action.

“Uhm…okay. Let me set up the couch for you then.”

Once everything was set up, you and Bucky thanking her for dinner - delicious and you’d never seen Bucky smile so much, the boys having kept him highly entertained throughout the meal - and for letting you crash, Sam and Sarah headed to their rooms, the boys already having been tucked in for the night.

“Are you gonna sleep on the floor?” You asked quietly, sitting down on the couch and doing the things for your night routine you didn’t already do in the bathroom.

“I think I’ll be okay.” He sat besides you. “I’ve been doing fine the past week or so.”

You smiled at him. “That’s good. Alright.” You stood up and stretched. “Let me just make sure everything’s in the bag and ready-”

You yelped when his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you into his chest, shifting down to lay against the couch’s arm. “Do it in the morning.” He yawned, looking up at you tiredly. “I wanna go to sleep.”

“Then go to sleep, Buck. I’ll be right back.” He shook his head, his hold tightening as he sunk deeper into the couch.

“No. I fall asleep better with you.”

You rolled your eyes but grinned, settling down with your legs between his, your chin resting on his sternum so you could still look at him. He beamed, but you could see the exhaustion settling in, and he grabbed the blanket Sarah left over the back of the couch and draped it across your back, over both of your legs, before his arms crossed snugly under the covers at the small of your back.

“Dinner was nice tonight. I haven’t had a meal cooked like that in ages.” You hummed.

He nodded in agreement. “I think that’s the first time I’ve sat around a table with a family since the 40′s.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Did you like it?”

“Yeah...kinda makes me wish I had my own.”

“Your own what?”

“Family.”

You bit your lip, shyly avoiding his gaze. “You’re my family, Buck.”

A light kiss was pressed to your forehead, his fingers bringing your gaze back to his. “There’s no one else I’d rather have.” The room lapsed into silence again, the clock ticking on the wall, the low sound of crickets outside.

“You have really pretty eyes.” You mumbled, tilting your head slightly as you studied them. They always held so much emotion in them, especially in contrast to when you first met him as Soldat. They matched the water you fell in, and you wouldn’t mind falling over and over into them.

“Yeah, well, you’re just really pretty inside and out, so I think you’ve got me beat, doll.” He whispered back.

“You know who else is pretty? Sarah.”

He nodded with a hum. “That’s true. But I meant what I said. You’ll always be my doll.”

“So you’re not gonna ask her out?”

He gave you a weird look as you traced his sharp jawline absentmindedly. “Nah, sweetheart. It’s just…some harmless flirting. Except on Sam’s part.”

You gave a soft huff of laughter. “Yeah…he’s gonna strangle you. It is nice to see you like that, though. Flirty. Relaxed. Happy.”

“You make me happy, sweetheart.” He hummed, nosing your temple. “The road trip helped. I’m learning everything from you. Maybe not the flirting, but the carefree part.”

You blinked at him, finger stopping for a moment as you thought. “Oh…”

You felt his fingers dance up your spine, making you shiver slightly. “What I would give to know what’s goin’ on inside that pretty lil’ head’a yours, doll.”

“I just think it’s funny you’re learning how to be carefree from me…when I just started learning how to do it myself.”

“Oh yeah?”

You nodded, your finger continuing its path down his jaw. “I think it started with the goats.”

“The goats?”

You nodded again, resting your cheek on his chest, watching your finger move up from his chin. Once you got to the end of his jaw, you lightly scratched his scruff. “In Wakanda. Our goats.” You weren’t looking at him, so you didn’t see the way he physically melted at your words, his eyes going soft, his lips turning up slightly.

“Our goats, huh?”

But your tired brain wasn’t really processing what he said, instead focusing on the features your finger was now tracing - over his lips, up his nose. “You’re pretty too, Buck. Did you know that? Inside and out.”

He craned his neck to kiss your forehead. “Go to sleep, cuddle bug.”

Nodding, you nuzzled into his chest, finger feeling over the bumps and indents on the dog tags resting near your head. You tried going to sleep, but you kept shifting, your mind not shutting off.

“Hey, sleepyhead, I’m trying to, you know, sleep.”

“Sorry.” You apologized meekly. “I just…I dunno. I can’t.”

“Are you comfortable?” He peeked open and eye to look at you questioningly. You nodded. “Is it too hot? We can take the blanket off. I know I’m a walking furnace-”

You shook your head. “No. I don’t know why. I just can’t sleep.”

He licked his lips thoughtfully, before cradling your head and guiding you back down to his chest. “Lay down, sweetheart. Relax.” He stroked your hair, moving his head down to rub circles in your back muscles, pressing down harder when he felt knots. 

You hummed, your eyes closing. “That feels good.”

“Shshsh. Just go to sleep.” His lips pressed against your head once more, lingering a bit longer than they usually do, as you felt yourself drift off. You cuddled his side, throwing a leg over his waist, before nodding off, only barely hearing his words. “Attagirl. There we are.”

******************

“Doll?” You felt a shift underneath you and groaned, your eyes barely cracking open. “Hey, sleepyhead…it’s okay. I’m just gonna slip out from under ya, alright? Gonna go help Sammy with somethin’.”

You raised an eyebrow, letting him move you against the cushions as he sat up on the edge of the couch. “Sammy?”

“Yeah.” He bent over and kissed your cheek. You stretched out your limbs, about to rub your eyes, when he stopped you, kissing the inside of your wrists. “No. Not you, doll. Go back to sleep.” 

“Bu’...’m gonna help.” You slurred out, looking at him with confused, squinty eyes.

He chuckled, shaking his head. “It’s okay. Rest. You can help when you wake up again. Okay?” You mumbled out an “okay”, bringing the covers up to your chin and snuggling deeper into the cushions. “There ya go, cuddle bug. Good girl.” There was another kiss, one to your temple this time, before you slipped back into unconsciousness.

******************

The next time you woke up was because of a clatter in the kitchen. You yawned and sat up, stretching, eyebrows furrowing when you realized Bucky wasn’t with you. It took you a moment to remember your conversation, which you half thought you dreamt.

“Boys!”

“Sorry!”

You chuckled at the shouts, rubbing your eyes. “I am so sorry!” Sarah apologized, looking over at you from the stove. Trying to make the boys breakfast before school. Do you want anything? Eggs? Cereal? Toast?”

“Uh, cereal’s fine.” You stretched out your back again, before throwing back the covers and standing up, a little shakily.

“You wouldn’t happen to know where Sam went, would you?”

You raised an eyebrow. “Uh, I think him and Bucky went to fix something on the boat. I don’t for sure, though.”

Sarah groaned. “He probably went to fix the stupid water pump which doens’t need fixing. Dumbass.”

You chuckled, padding over into the kitchen. “Yeah. I just work with him. I can’t imagine growing up with him.”

“Trust me; some days you want to throw him in a box and send him out to sea. Bowls are in that cupboard.”

You snickered, moving over to grab a bowl from the cupboard she pointed to. “That’s how I feel with Bucky. Sam is less often, but when those two get together…it’s a full zoo.”

She laughed at that, nodding as she got out the milk and a few boxes of cereal for you to choose from, handing you a spoon. “That I believe.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course.”

You started pouring your cereal, watching in slight amusement as she got the boys ready for school. “Bus is here! Get out the door! Bye! Love you! Make sure you take those extra lunches to-!”

“Yeah, mom! We know! Love you too!”

You gave a slight smirk as she huffed, looking around the kitchen at the pans and dishes left out. “Kids, huh?”

She gave you a smile. “Yeah. They’re a handful, but I wouldn’t trade them for anything. How about you? Any thoughts of kids?”

“Me?” Your eyes widened, nearly choking on your food. “Oh God no. Not right now, at least. I don’t even have a solid house right now. My life’s too off the walls for that.”

“And Bucky?”

You raised an eyebrow as she leaned on the counter. “Bucky? What about Bucky?”

“Does he want kids?”

“Uh…I dunno.” You shrugged, clearing your throat as you remembered your talk last night. “Kinda makes me wish I had my own.” You quickly pushed his words aside. “He hasn’t told me.”

“Wait, wait. You two…aren’t together then?”

You blinked, your eyes widening again. “Together? Me and Bucky? No…why? Did Sam say something?”

Her expression morphed into one of disbelief, crossing her arms. “Sam didn’t say anything. You guys did. Are you seriously expecting me to believe you aren’t together?”

“We’re not! I mean - he was flirting with you yesterday-”

“Right, okay. Honey, that’s flirting. And it’s harmless. The way he follows you like a puppy and you look at him like he hung the stars? That’s feelings. And that’s a lot more impactful than flirting.”

You frowned in contemplation. It was really that obvious? You were really that blind? This whole time? You knew Sam knew - but you just figured that’s because he’s been there since it started. And Sharon knew for the same reason. But Sarah? The woman you just met the day prior and had barely had a conversation with?

“It’s, uh…” You chewed on your cheek, swirling your cereal around. “It’s complicated.”

Sarah didn’t look impressed. “Do you like him?”

“I’m kinda in love with him-”

She shrugged, not letting you finish your bashful statement. “Then I don’t see what’s complicated about it.”

And that was that. She turned to clean up breakfast, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

You thought it was more complicated than that. I mean…you were in love with your best friend. Who left you. With the guy you had feelings for who just so happened to be your best friend/crush’s best friend. And now you were completely in love with your best friend’s best friend, but your best friend still had a piece of your heart.

But…you loved Bucky. And he was here. And Steve was not. And when you put it that way…you guess it wasn’t so complicated after all.

******************

You snickered as you walked up behind Sarah, the woman berating the men for not leaving the water pump along like she asked.

“Hi, Sarah.”

Sam shot Bucky a warning look, who grinned, but you were surprised to see Sarah ignore him, sending you a knowing glance instead, before turning back to Sam. “I told you specifically that the water pump was not the problem, and yet, here you are.”

“Yep, Samuel.”

You chuckled, Bucky shooting you a wink. “Yeah, Samuel.”

Sam narrowed his eyes at you, turning to Sarah. “In our defense, you were supposed to be done long before you woke up.”

You nearly facepalmed at his “defensive” and you were trying so hard to hold back laughing as she told Sam off, sending them away.

“I don’t wanna hear a peep from you.” Sam pointed at you, but that only made your chortles come out, and you didn’t even bother hiding them. “She’s a very mean person.”

“It’s tough love.”

You giggled as they started arguing, slipping an arm around their waists, their arms instinctually coming up to your shoulders.

“Oh my God. A prowess?”

“Yes, Y/N. A prowess.”

“You know, maybe if you someone let me help-”

“Hey, woah! You were tired! I let you sleep! I was being nice!”

“Too late now. I’ll be lucky if Sarah lets me within a hundred feet of it!”

“She got you so good, Sammy!”

“I agree with Buck for once! You’re too snippy right now! And c’mon man! Stop flirting with my sister!”

“It’s my natural charm.”

“Charm? What charm?”

“Ouch, doll! That one hurt!”

****************

“Okay.” You stepped out of the bathroom, walking over to the couch and setting the bag down on it. “I’ve got everything packed. We’ve got a little over an hour until we need to head out which gives you two time to go set something up for Sammy and maybe even a bit or training before we leave.” 

Bucky frowned. “You’re not gonna come out?”

“I will in a bit. I just got a phone call I need to take.”

Sam narrowed his eyes. “Government call?”

You gave a mocking smile. “Can you guess what they want to talk about? It’s okay. I’ll survive. It’s only a phone call, so I can always hang up. Pretend I didn’t have good service. I do it all the time.”

“I’m sure you do.” Sam chuckled. “In that case, I’m gonna go grab some stuff and get the shield.” As he walked out, he made sure to mouth at you behind Bucky’s back ‘conversation’ making you swallow thickly. You were planning on talking to Bucky anyways, and with Sam’s insistence…

“Okay, so, I was thinking when we get back-”

“Can I talk to you?”

Bucky stopped digging through the bag, blinking at you in surprise at your sudden burst. “Uh…well, we already are, so yes.” He chuckled, straightening and crossing his arms.

“I wanna have the conversation.”

He was left stunned, once again, his mouth opening and closing and his weight shifting form one foot to the other. “Like…that conversation? R-right now? Are you sure?”

You winced at her nervousness. “Sorry, sorry. I know it’s kinda…I just…I need to talk about it. Now.”

“Okay, okay. No, that’s fine. Don’t apologize. I just wasn’t expecting it.” Bucky cleared his throat. “That’s all.”

“Okay…” You breathed with a small nod. You opened your mouth, but Bucky shook his head.

“I hafta say this first; I didn’t mean to hurt you by telling you about Steve. I-I dunno what I thought. That it’d give you closure or something. I dunno. But it hurt you and I’m sorry. That wasn’t my intention.”

“Buck-”

“I was jealous. And guilty. And mad. And upset. I still am. Kinda. I guess. I dunno.” Bucky shook his head, running his hand through his hair and all you could do was gape at him as he started confessing to you. “Remember when we danced? In Madripoor? Doll…I don’t wanna dance ever again if it’s not with you. I fucking love you, Y/N. And not in the way we’ve said it before. I’m in love with you. I have been for-for a while now. I just - you were Steve’s. Steve loved you and you loved Steve and that was that and I was just the broken childhood best friend. But Steve left and he told me to take care of you and I didn’t know what to do with that, because you still love Steve. I think. I dunno. And I didn’t want to break what we have because you’re all I have left of him. You and that stupid shield. You’re my family. My home. I really meant it when I told you that. And that’s why I couldn’t tell you. Because it means too much for me to break what we have because I fell in love with my best friend’s girl. You know?”

He looked at you with pleading eyes, begging you to understand, but your brain was still trying to process what he was telling you.

“Oh God…” He groaned. “And now I just told you everything and you’re looking at me like that wasn’t what you wanted to hear and now I’m thinking this wasn’t the conversation you were thinking it was going to be-”

You were moving across the room before you could stop yourself, pulling him by the teal Henley you knew was comfortable having worn it to bed before when you visited him in New York, and slanting your lips over his.

His breathing hitched and he froze, and for a hot second you thought you made everything worse, but then he was kissing you back and his hands were on your hips and he was pulling you closer and it felt so fucking good you didn’t want to pull back for air.

“Shut up.” You muttered when you finally did pull back, your forehead against his, your eyes clenched shut. “Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up.” You pulled back to look up at him, chests heaving against each other, your eyes prickling. “I’m not good at this. I’m not good at opening up. I only ever was good at it with Steve but Bucky…I’ve been doing it with you. This whole time and I didn’t even realize it until the conversation in the car.”

He reached up to cup your cheeks, wiping away the relieved tears that were falling from the weight you were finally getting off your chest.

“I love you. I’m in love with you. How could I not be? After all that time in Wakanda? I was never Steve’s girl, Bucky. I wanted to be. Dammit, did I wanna be, but I wasn’t. Not really. And he’s gone. But you’re not. And I don’t know why it took me so long to see that. That you’re the one in front of me. You’re the one who held me when I needed it once he left. You’re the one that would listen to my rambles that I’m just realizing was most of our phone calls. You’re not just the broken childhood friend. Don’t ever think that. I don’t pick up the phone at five in the morning after searching for a friend until two for just anyone. Even Steve’s best friend. And I’m such an idiot because I’ve been pushing away my feelings all these years for Steve and then I let them out with you at the wrong time, because I love Steve, Bucky, but I’m not in love with him. Not since I fell in love with you. And I know it doesn’t make sense, but Steve was the first one I cared about and that’s just how I feel and I can try to explain, but-”

His lips crashed onto yours again and you could taste the salty tears that were pouring down your cheeks, but you didn’t care. He was holding you and he was kissing you and it was even more perfect than you thought it’d be.

“You’re adorable when you ramble, but Jesus Christ, shuddup, doll.” He breathed. “Just tell me you love me. Tell me you love me just a fraction of how much I love you.”

You looked up into those ocean eyes, your own shining with earnest affection. “James Buchanan Barnes. I love you.”

“That’s all I need to know.” He murmured against your lips, holding your head against his, still wiping away your tears. It felt like with each one that fell, you felt lighter and lighter. Like they were taking away every fear and anxiety you held within you for the past six months.

“Alright! I was thinking we could just set up in these trees out here - holy shit! Is it done? Did you do it? Did I miss it? Has the conversation been had?”

Bucky chuckled as you giggled. “He has the worst timing.” The last two words were loud enough so Sam could hear, although the man heard the whole sentence. 

“I’m gonna take that as a yes!” Sam cheered. “Halle-fucking-lujah! Finally! I was that close to locking you two in the attic.”

You shook your head at Sam’s personal celebration, drowning the rest of his words out as you looked at Bucky, who swept his thumb over your cheek catching one last tear, before pecking your lips.

“I finally get to kiss where I really want to.” He spoke softly, kissing your lips again. “Are you mine, doll?”

“I thought you said I’d always be your doll.” You answered cheekily. He grinned, kissing you again, pulling you against him by the hips.

“Okay, okay! That’s enough! We get it! You’re in love, finally, but I don’t wanna see it anymore! Now will you come help me with this shit?”

Bucky left one more lingering kiss on your lips, before you pushed him away reluctantly. “I’ll be right out.”

He nodded, moving over to help Sam carry the things he’d gathered.

You watched them put it all up from the window, gnawing on your cheek as you spun your phone in your hands. Coming to a decision, you tossed your phone in the duffle bag and walked out with it just as the boys finished.

“That was a quick phone call.” Sam raised an eyebrow.

You shrugged. “Didn’t call them. If they really need me, they’ll find me.”

Bucky grinned as you set the bag down under a tree, pecking your lips when you got close enough for him to grab by the waist to hold you against him. You rolled your eyes, shoving him playfully away and giggling as Sam let out a groan.

“Alright. Let’s see what you’ve got, Sammy.”

~

><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><

Bucky knew he needed the tough love talk Sam was giving him. He needed to hear it. Because, deep down, he had known it all along, he just refused to believe it. He tried doing it. Making amends. He knew he wasn’t though. And of course he knew immediately who that one person would be.

“And hey.” Bucky looked at him. “Let me tell you what. Telling my girl all that you told her? That’s a good start. I’m proud of you. Both of you. You’re already happier. I can see it in your eyes.”

Bucky chuckled, shaking his head as he thought of the gorgeous woman he nearly let slip through his fingers. He looked over to the house, where she was inside somewhere getting ready after suddenly deciding she needed to shower before they left. “I was stupid.”

“Yeah you were. You both were. I’m so relieved it’s over.” Sam nudged him. “Treat her right, Buck. She deserves it.”

“I know…I just hope I can.”

Sam shook his head. “Uh-uh. Don’t do that. You were just starting to use that cyborg brain of yours! She chose you. And before you say anything,” Sam cut Bucky off from speaking as he opened his mouth to object. “She chose you before Steve left. It just took her dumbass this long to realize it.”

Bucky nodded, a small smile on his face. “Yeah…okay…” Before he could say anything, the goddess herself stepped out, jogging over, looking absolutely amazing in her jeans and his t-shirt. “Good talk.”

Sam laughed at his quick ending of the conversation as she came up besides them. “Talking about me?” She asked cheekily, eyes shining. Bucky couldn’t help but take her under his arm, pecking her lips. Now that he could, he didn’t think he could stop. He was addicted to say the least.

Throwing Bucky a wink, Sam shrugged. “Just all the things that get on our nerves.”

“Ha ha.” She rolled her eyes. “We better get going.”

Bucky and Sam clapped hands. “You know Karli won’t quit.”

Bucky smiled. “Ah. You call us when you have a lead and we’ll be there.”

Y/N stepped forwards to give Sam a hug. “Anytime, Sammy.”

“Eh. Anytime between noon and midnight.” Bucky corrected. “Or noon and ten. Noon and five…you better just call at noon to be safe.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Sure, sure.”

“Not necessarily as a team.” Bucky continued, grabbing the bag, getting Y/N back in her spot at his side under his arm.

“Nope!”

“We’re not that good.”

“Definitely not.”

“We’re professionals.”

“Definitely.”

“And, uh, we’re partners.”

Sam snapped, pointing at him. “Coworkers.”

“But we’re also a couple of guys with a couple mutual friends.”

“Ones now gone and you’re dating the other.”

“So we’re a couple of guys…with a badass to help out.”

“I can live with that.”

“Perfect.”

“Oh my God.” Y/N let out that laugh Bucky could never get enough of, shaking her head at the two of them. “You forgot dumbasses.”

Sam shook his head. “Nuh-uh. That’s your couple name.”

“Dumbasses?”

“Oh yeah.” The three of them came to a stop, Bucky and his girl - God he loved confirming it now - facing Sam. “Thanks for the help, guys. Meant a lot.”

Bucky patted his shoulder. “Of course.”

Y/N shot him a wink. “Until we meet again, Sammy.”

“Until then, cher.”

Bucky couldn’t stop his grin as she wrapped her arms around his waist, the two of them starting to walk to the main road where she already ordered an Uber. He looked down at her, kissing her lips for the nth time in the past hour.

“I wish I didn’t wait so long,” he told her seriously. “But I’d wait a thousands more centuries if it meant I get to call you mine.”

She giggled, shaking her head. “You’re such a sap! But…” she moved up to kiss him and his heart stuttered. He knew he had a goofy grin on when she pulled back, but he couldn’t help it. Especially when she laughed again. “I have to agree with you on that, Buckaroo.”

#cjsinkythoughts #cjswriting #cjsspoilers #fatws spoilers #tfatws spoilers #falcon and the winter soldier spoilers #fatws #tfatws #falcon and the winter soldier #fatws series #fatws pt 6.3 #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x avenger!reader #bucky x avenger!reader #bucky barnes #❤🐦💙🦾 #💙🦾

[seijorhi]

Reminiscent

i’m (semi) back, y’all, and i come bearing a fic!! fhdjhfjdk it’s for oikawa i won’t apologise

Oikawa Tooru x female reader

TW non-con, drunk/drugged reader, forced infidelity, emotional manipulation, angst, past trauma, coercion, mild(ish?) smut, nsfw

“F-fuck, cutie! Just like – hah– just like that!”

You weren’t the clubbing type.

Not usually, at least – but exams were over and one of your friends was fresh off a bad breakup, one night letting loose wouldn’t hurt.

Walking is… difficult, your steps are sloppy – there’s an arm wrapped around your waist, your own slung over a stranger’s shoulders. Why are you outside? Where are your friends – they… they promised they wouldn’t leave you. 

“She good, dude?”

A soft, pretty laugh rumbles at your side, “Yeah, she’s gonna be just fine.”

And you remember the bar, the overpriced cocktails and the saccharine sweetness of strawberry liquor on your tongue. The dizzying lights and the bass that thumped so loudly you felt it reverberate in your chest. You knew the rules; they’d been drilled into you since you were sixteen years old.

Stick together, don’t accept drinks from strangers, and watch the one in your hand like a hawk - it doesn’t leave your sight.

A tongue between the valley of your breasts, long fingers curling up inside of you. 

“You like that, huh pretty girl? You gonna cum for me?”

They wouldn’t have just abandoned you, right? Maybe you told them to go. Maybe they thought you wanted it; to go home with the handsome stranger.

You never had the guts to ask them, never spoke about that night again. Not to anyone.

Pain. Something thrusting inside of you, splitting you open while he moans and pants atop you. It hurts so much and you want it to stop. 

Please stop. Please. Please. Please.

You’re begging, at least you think you are, but the words come out jumbled and wrong, and he just laughs, hiking up your thigh so he can fuck you deeper.

Why won’t he stop?

When you wake up, bruised and sore and all alone in your bed, it feels like a bad dream. You know it’s not – not with cum still seeping from between your thighs, the scent of the stranger’s cologne clinging to your sheets.

And you scrub your skin raw in the shower, but it isn’t enough to rid you of his touch.

—

It’s nothing like what they show on tv.

There’s no sympathetic detective to pat you on your shoulder while you break down, swearing that they’ll find the man who did this and you’ll get your justice.

You don’t go to the cops because you’ll know what they’ll say. You were drunk, drugged, and even if you could remember what he looked like (his eyes were brown, you think, and there’s a flash of a smirk in your head but the moment you try to focus on it it slips away like smoke) any evidence of rape washed down the drain the moment you stepped into the steaming shower.

At least… that’s what you tell yourself. It’s easier than admitting you’re terrified of judgemental eyes. 

Or worse; pitying ones.

So you pretend that nothing happened. You show up to your classes and throw yourself into studying, make the time to get coffee with your friends, you even pick up a part time job – it’s good to keep busy. 

The nightmares are just that; nightmares.

And things are fine, until they’re not.

—

“Baby, you’re here!!”

There’s barely time to drop your bags before she’s pulling you into a warm hug. “Hi mom,” you reply, squeezing her back.

When she draws back to take you in, one hand cupping your cheek, she frowns, “You look tired sweetheart. Have you been sleeping enough?”

“Yeah, just tired from exams and stuff.”

She looks unconvinced, but mercifully doesn’t push the issue. Of course, you don’t tell her that you missed your last two exams because you’d walked past some guy wearing that same cologne and just choked – that instead of finishing off your semester strong, you’d spent the day alternating between throwing up and crying in bed.

She doesn’t need to know that, because of that, you’ll probably fail both classes and have to retake them again next semester on top of an already full course load. It’s fine; you’ll figure it out.

For now, you work on matching her enthusiasm at having you home, grabbing your bags to bring them inside and into your old room.

“Oh, wait–”

Abruptly, you pause, gazing in confusion from the doorway of your bedroom. There’s a duffle bag lying open and empty atop your bed, a tangled jump rope, some weights, an empty bottle, a sweat towel – even what looks like a spare workout tee scattered haphazardly across the sheets.

“… I didn’t take you for a gym junkie, mom.”

She stops behind you, sighing. “It’s not mine it’s– Tooru said he was going to tidy it up, sorry sweetheart.” She sweeps past you to start tidying it up, but not before you catch sight of her wide eyed, deer in headlights expression.

And you can’t help the lone eyebrow that rises, falling back against the doorframe, arms folding across your chest. “Tooru, huh?” you grin, “And who might Tooru be?”

The flustered, almost guilty look she sends you makes you want to laugh – this is easy, comfortable, this you can do – but you restrain yourself. Just. “Tooru is… he’s– well, he’s the man I’m… seeing.”

She admits it like she’s confessing to a crime, eyes all wide and nervous; anticipating your reaction. And you suppose it’s not unwarranted. As far as you’re aware, she’s been alone ever since the day your dad walked out on you both – raising you was always the priority, or maybe the excuse. But you’re not fourteen anymore, you don’t need another father figure or every spare bit of her time and attention, and she doesn’t need your approval for this.

So you smile at her, “Is he nice?”

She lights up, her features – almost a mirror image of your own – softening as she beams, “He’s amazing, honey. I honestly don’t know how this whole thing really happened, or why he’s even interested in someone like me but… I lucked out with him.”

And so it goes, you prying little bits of information about the mysterious Tooru as the afternoon passes.

She tells you that they met a few months back, at the bakery she likes in town – and how she kept running into him; at the grocery store, and then at the park, and then on her way back from yoga that one night.

She tells you that he’s a terrible flirt, all smooth and charming with warm, pretty brown eyes, but he’s a good man beneath it all and she’s never met anyone like him. 

It strikes you, as you watch your mom animatedly talk about him, that you’ve never seen her look like this before. 

Happy. 

She can’t stop smiling, and when you look at her, really look, she’s almost a different person – younger somehow, a bit more care-free. It suits her, and you wonder with a slight pang in your heart how you never noticed how lonely she was before.

And she’s adamant that they’re taking things slowly, that he still has an apartment of his own in town – which to be honest, you really aren’t gonna judge her on either way – but it is kind of funny simply because whether your mom realises it or not, it’s clearly a lie.

The subtle reclaiming of your bedroom aside, there’s traces of Tooru scattered all around the house; the extra toothbrush and aftershave you’d spotted in the bathroom, the men’s  shoes and the jacket by the door, red wine in the cupboard when your mom’s only ever indulged in white.

You haven’t been into her bedroom, but at this point you’d hazard a guess that there’s at least one drawer full of Tooru’s clothes, probably half her closet cleared out for him as well.

“He’s coming for dinner, but I just wanted today to be just us,” she says, reaching across the couch to squeeze your hand. And you’re grateful for it, because you’re happy for her – you are – but you’re not so sure how you would’ve handled meeting the stranger holding your mother’s heart first thing. At least, not after the last few days.

Not when you still feel all… brittle. 

—

Tooru arrives a little after seven, and to say that he’s not entirely what you were expecting is kind of an understatement. 

She’d gushed about how tall and handsome he is – though personally, you think pretty’s the more accurate word, what with his soft, delicate features, perfect cupid’s bow lips and all. What she’d neglected to tell you was that the man in question, stepping through the front door with a faint smile on his face, has to be at least ten years younger than her, mid-thirties at most.

Suddenly, your mom’s initial reluctance to bring him up starts to make sense.

“Hey, sorry I’m late,” he murmurs, stopping by your mom to drop a fleeting kiss to her cheek before warm brown eyes turn to you. 

Your heart stutters.

“Sweetheart,” your mom begins, slipping an arm around his waist and relaxing into his side, “this is Tooru– Oikawa,” she corrects herself.

He smiles at you, friendly and charming, “It’s great to finally meet you, your mom’s told me so much – all good things, of course!”

You force yourself to smile in return, “Yeah, you too.” 

There’s nothing overtly wrong with Oikawa, age difference aside – your mom’s clearly head over heels in love with the guy and on a surface level he seems nice enough, but you find yourself glad for the fact that he doesn’t make a move to step closer, try to shake your hand or god forbid hug you or something like that.

He’s nothing but a gentleman as your mom steps back into the kitchen to finish off dinner, setting the table without being prompted, pouring a glass of wine for your mom and one for himself before he offers a glass to you. 

“Oh, no I’m alright, thanks.”

You don’t drink so much anymore. He shrugs, like it’s no big deal but your mom pouts at you from the kitchen. “C’mon, sweetie. We’re celebrating tonight! One drink won’t hurt.”

“We’re celebrating?” you ask.

She throws you a wink, gaze softening as she turns to glance at Oikawa, already diligently pouring you a glass, “Of course we are. It’s not every day my girl comes home, and it’s nice having you both here with me.”

Oikawa’s fingers brush against yours for a fleeting second as he passes you the glass, and you have to fight to keep yourself from ripping your hand away. It’s nothing, you just– you’re not good with strangers touching you, and as nice as he is and as much as your mom might be infatuated with him, he is still a stranger.

“Absolutely,” he agrees, a playful twinkle in his eye as he clinks his wine glass against yours. “So you’re at uni, right? What are you studying?”

Uni’s the last thing you want to be thinking about right now, but whether or not Oikawa genuinely cares, he’s obviously trying to make an effort to get to know you. For your mother’s sake, grinning innocuously in the kitchen as she adds the last little touches to dinner, you suck it up, plaster a smile across your face and ignore the twinge of discomfort in your gut.

You can handle one night of small talk.

—

You wake the following morning to the sound of voices carrying down the hall.  

Not your mother’s – both are too deep, and your mom left a few hours ago for work. Figuring that one of them at least is likely Oikawa, you pull on a thin, satin robe over your pajamas, tying the sash in a loose knot before you slip from the room.

Those suspicions are proven correct; you round the corner to find Oikawa sitting up at the kitchen counter, a warm cup of coffee in his hand. There’s another man, a touch shorter, but imposing with dark, spiky hair and olive green eyes standing on the other side, hands braced on the marble top, glaring at Oikawa.

They both look up at the sound of your hesitant approach, the stranger abruptly straightening up, while Oikawa merely grins.

“Ah, you’re up,” he observes cheerfully, taking a sip of his coffee.

Your eyes flicker between him and the stranger – clearly comfortable enough in your home and with Oikawa, despite the faint, lingering irritation still visible on his face – and as your cheeks warm, you find yourself wishing you’d put actual clothes on before coming out to investigate.

“I- I heard voices…” you trail off, awkwardly folding your arms over your chest. “Is mom–”

“At work,” he supplies. “Do you want some breakfast? Coffee, maybe?”

You risk another glance at the other man, watching you now with an unreadable expression, dark eyebrows furrowed. You swallow uncomfortably, shifting slightly as you shake your head. “No, I-I’m okay.”

And in an instant, a flash, something like recognition passes through those olive eyes. 

 Oikawa chuckles smoothly, finally tearing his eyes away from you to address his friend, “Iwa, stop being so rude. You’re scaring the poor thing.”

The stranger, Iwa, just scoffs. “You’re a real piece of shit, y’know?”

If he’s bothered by the scathing insult, Oikawa doesn’t show it, merely shrugging before turning his attention back to you with a smirk. “Ignore him, he’s just pissy this morning.”

You’d have to be a complete idiot not to sense the uncomfortable tension between the two of them – and now you. This is your home, but it feels like you’re intruding, like you’ve stumbled into a conversation you have no business hearing, but even if you wanted to leave your feet are rooted to the ground. 

“Besides,” Oikawa continues, “he was just leaving anyway, weren’t you, Iwa?” It’s almost a purr, the way he speaks, but even the silken words can’t entirely mask the razor sharpness that lies beneath. 

Goosebumps prickle along your arms.

Staring at you, Iwa opens his mouth like he wants to say something, but seemingly thinks better of it, snapping it shut with an audible click. He huffs, shaking his head. “Yeah, fine, whatever.”

He spares you another glance on his way out, standing frozen by the hall. For a split second he slows, his scowl softening just a fraction–

“Iwa.”

It sounds like a warning, but he only rolls his eyes and huffs again. You think he’s going to walk out without another word to either of you, but he pauses once more, lingering by the entryway.

“You look a lot like your mother, anyone ever tell you that?”

He’s out the door before you can even think to reply, letting it slam shut in his wake. And you flinch at the harsh sound, something uneasy settling into the pit of your stomach–

“Hey,” Oikawa’s there by your side, his fingers entwining with yours. You hadn’t even heard him move. “Come sit, don’t worry about Iwa. He’ll get over it.”

His voice is soothing, you don’t pay attention to the words themselves, the implications there. You forget for a moment that you’re still in your pj’s, that you really don’t know him that well either, and mindlessly follow when he leads you to the couch and sits you down, taking the seat next to you.

And while your head’s still spinning, an uncomfortable feeling gnawing in the pit of your gut, Oikawa seems entirely unbothered by the turn of events, sighing contentedly as he stretches his long legs out, one arm sliding along the back of the couch behind you.

“Do your… friends usually just drop by like that?”

You don’t know where the words come from, or why that’s the first question on your mind, but when you glance over at him, Oikawa’s just watching you, an odd little half smirk playing on his lips. “Sometimes.”

His answer does little to soothe your unease. It’s really not a big deal, you know it’s not. Officially or not, this is his home too – you’re the one out of place. And if he wants to have people over when your mom’s not around, that’s fine, he can do whatever the hell he wants, but… 

You came home for peace. To hide away for a few days and pretend that everything’s just fine and you’re not one breakdown away from shattering entirely. You wanted your mom and the comfort of your old bedroom and safety and it’s fine – great, even – that she’s found somebody who makes her happy, but this– him and the weirdness with his friend and everything is just too much, and–

You don’t realise that your leg’s bouncing until Oikawa’s hand comes to rest on your bare thigh. It’s enough to make your stomach flip, an icy chill trickling down your spine as his thumb slowly strokes across the soft, plush skin. “Relax, cutie,” he coos, chuckling softly when you visibly flinch and squeeze your eyes shut.

“P-please don’t call me that,” you choke out, fighting against the wave of nausea rising up your throat. And it’s just like last time, his cologne, notes of vanilla and cedar and spice, swirling thick and heady around you. That phantom touch, the warmth of hands gripping too tight, unwanted kisses hot and eager against your skin. 

“No?” he asks, cruel amusement dripping from his tone. “Why not? I think it suits you, cutie.”

You want him to stop, to push him away, slap him – do anything really, but you’re frozen in place, shaking as the memories you’ve fought so hard to shove down come bubbling back to the surface. You can’t think straight, not with his hand sliding between your thighs, the warmth of his body pressing too closely against yours.

“Iwa was right, you know,” Oikawa murmurs, smoldering brown eyes drinking you in as you childishly shake your head, willing him away. His other hand catches your cheek, drawing your face back to him as tears well in your eyes, stubbornly clinging to your lashes. “She does look so much like you, the same eyes even.” 

He whispers it like a secret, nuzzling his nose against yours like a lover would as he sighs sweetly, “It’s the only reason I could stand it.”

And then he’s kissing you, the tenderness of his lips belied by iron fingers digging into your jaw when you whimper and try to wrench yourself free. 

It’s not like the nightmares that startle you awake in the middle of the night, gasping for air; hazy, broken recollections that fade the moment you try to reach for them. No, every touch, every moment of his assault passes in stark clarity.

The feel of Oikawa’s mouth as it trails greedily down your neck, his hand sliding under the cotton of your sleep shorts, even his pleased little hum when he realises you’re not wearing panties. “Such a good girl for me. Fuck, I’ve missed this.”

This time there’s no drugs in your system keeping you pliant and helpless, but that doesn’t make a difference. Not when his words echo in your head, playing again and again until every awful, sickening piece falls into place.

Long, nimble fingers stroke at your folds, and you can’t help the shivery gasp that leaves you when the tip of his middle finger sweeps over your clit. 

“Please– please don’t do this,” you sniffle.

Oikawa presses another fleeting kiss to your shoulder, “Shh, none of that. Let me help you, baby.”

“N-no, I don’t, I don’t– Stop!”

Knocking away the hands that try to push him back, he hooks his fingers over the hem of your shorts and slides them down your legs, your pitifully weak struggles only making things easier for him. It’s only when Oikawa reaches for his own zipper that panic truly strikes home.

You can’t just lie here and let this happen again. You won’t.

And like a switch flipped, you start to trash like a wild thing beneath him, the scream you’ve kept buried inside of you for months ripping itself free from your throat–

Only for the fingers that had been toying with your pussy to be shoved down your throat, cutting you off with a choked gurgle. As you gag, fruitlessly try to tug yourself free, Oikawa leans in nice and close – except this time there’s no gentleness to his expression, nothing but viciousness as he grins and bares his teeth. 

“You wanna yell, pretty girl? Want the neighbours to come running, let them see me fuck you?” He grinds his hips against you, his breath shivery as he pants at the friction of his half hard cock against your side. Nausea twists at your gut, acrid and bitter – you want to be sick, to cry and beg with him to stop but with his fingers still stuffed in your mouth, his thumb digging into the soft underside of your jaw all you can manage is an unintelligible whine. He hums, kissing away the single hot tear that spills down your cheek, “You think if you cry loudly enough, mommy’ll come home and save you?”

And it’s like time stands still as he laughs, cruel eyes glinting when he presses down on your tongue, warm saliva pooling around his digits. “Such a little whore, trying to seduce her poor, innocent boyfriend the very moment her back’s turned. Tell me, cutie,” he coos, “who do you think she’d believe?”

Your breath hitches, another sob catching in your throat – even if you wanted to answer, you can’t and he knows it. “She’s in love with me, you know. It’s almost a little pathetic how easy it was to manipulate her into bed – so lonely… desperate for love, for somebody – anybody – to pay attention to her, take care of her,” he sneers, distaste curling at his lips. “Wouldn’t it just break her fragile little heart to know she’s fallen for the man who raped her baby girl?”

Another garbled cry slips past his fingers and you can only watch in frozen horror as his other hand drifts back to his zipper. “You want to protect her, don’t you?”

His grip relents just enough for you to jerk a shaky nod.

“Pretty girl, so good for me.” Another kiss pressed to your cheek as the quiet hiss of his zipper fills the air around you. “It’ll be our little secret, hmm? She doesn’t need to know just yet, let her be happy a little while longer…”

Sliding down his briefs just far enough for his cock to spring free, he strokes it for a moment with slow, leisurely movements, his tongue darting out to wet his lips as he watches your eyes widen. 

And when he pulls you forward, guides your mouth towards it, pre-cum beading at the tip, withdrawing his fingers so you can quickly gasp for air, you just… let him.

The fight’s gone, as quickly as it had come. 

You let his fingers curl through your hair, use it as an anchor when your lips part to force his cock between them. And he moans, low and shivery as your tongue slides along the underside of his shaft and you try not to gag around the sudden intrusion. 

You think that there’s no room left inside of you for shame, but as his other hand creeps back between your legs, teasing at your cunt, you burn with it, clinging to the pyre of your own humiliation and disgust.

And still, you kneel on the couch, letting him fuck your mouth, letting those long, pretty fingers curl up inside of you – moaning around his cock when they stroke that perfect little spot.

“I wanted to – shit – take this slow,” he tells you as his hips jerk upwards, shuddering in breathless delight when his cock hits the back of your throat and it convulses around him. “I wanted to make you want me.”

Wet, messy, gags sound with every unwitting thrust – you’ve no choice but to swallow him down, let him fuck your throat like you’re nothing more than a toy for his pleasure. There’s saliva coating your chin, dripping down the length of his dick, pooling around his balls. You can barely breathe, a task made even harder when Oikawa decides to add his thumb into the mix, teasing your clit while he fucks you apart on his fingers.

It feels so fucking good, and you’ve never hated yourself more.

Your throat burns, hot tears stinging in the corners of your eyes, and yet he’s intent on driving you to the brink of your sanity with every calculated flick of his wrist. Something tightens in your belly, a spring coiled too tight, ready to snap, and you can’t help it when your hips chase his fingers, the needy, shameful little whimpers that leave your lips (still wrapped around his thick, twitching cock) as you search for the pleasure to temper the discomfort.

“You don’t have a clue what you do to me, do you? I could barely sleep last night–” 

You choke back a moan, your pussy clenching around his digits, sucking them deeper as white spots pepper your vision and you shudder out a moan.

“So pretty when you cum for me,” he pants, but you don’t care – can’t, not when you’re riding his fingers, tongue lolling out as he gives you a moment’s reprieve to bask in the rippling afterglow of your orgasm before everything comes crashing back down around you. 

Oikawa lets you fall back against the cushions, breathless, trembling and dazed. You’re not stupid enough to believe that’s the end of it, not when his cock’s still hard, throbbing against his toned stomach when he gives it a slow, cursory pump.

“Lie back, cutie,” he whispers, keeping his eyes fixed on you as he pushes himself up off the couch to shed the rest of his clothes.

And as you shuffle obediently downwards, heart hammering in your chest, you find you can’t tear your eyes away from him either.

Tall and handsome, she’d said, but the words truly don’t do him justice. A body corded with lean, powerful muscle, golden, sun-kissed skin, a light smattering of dark hair trailing from his navel down past the well defined V of his hips… 

“See something you like?” he teases, smirking when you squeak and childishly jerk your face away, cheeks burning. “It’s okay to look, you know. I don’t mind the attention.”

It feels too soft, too intimate for what this is. 

This isn’t how it’s supposed to go. He’s not supposed to be attractive, or to make you enjoy your own assault, and you– you’re supposed to fight it, fight him instead of just lying there and taking it… 

But when he climbs back onto the couch, easing your still trembling thighs apart to settle himself between them, his touch is nothing short of reverent, dark eyes wide and adoring as you squirm uneasily beneath him. 

With one hand braced on the cushion beside you, his cock resting just above your aching sex, he leans forward, easing your top up past your tits. “Perfect,” he murmurs.

And it’s enough to make a fresh bout of humiliated tears spring to your eyes. Your hands curl into useless fists at your side as he settles back onto his knees and takes his cock in hand, hissing in pleasure when he glides the flushed, leaking head along your slick folds.

“Fuck, cutie. I don’t think I’m gonna last,” he laughs, biting down on his bottom lip as he watches hot, fat tears slip down your cheeks. With an agonisingly slow pace, Oikawa lines himself up with your cunt and presses in – even with how wet you are, one orgasm already wrung from you, the stretch burns and you can’t stop the choked gasp that leaves you.

His eyes flutter shut, head thrown back back as inch by inch his cock sinks into your pussy until finally he bottoms out with a satisfied groan. “Perfect for me, so fucking good,” he pants, and you barely have time to drag in a breath before his hips are drawing back, another desperate, strangled mewl escaping you.

Bruising fingers dig into your waist, Oikawa cursing as your plush little cunt flutters maddeningly around him– before he eagerly slams his cock forward, stuffing you full once more.

And as you sob and whimper between every wet, obscene squelch of his dick fucking into your soaked pussy, that all too familiar, shameful heat begins to pool in your core.

“Gonna cum for me again, cutie?”

#yandere haikyuu #yandere oikawa #yandere oikawa x reader #yandere oikawa tooru #yandere oikawa tooru x reader #tw: noncon #tw:dubcon #tw: drugged reader #tw: infidelity #angst #pain #manipulation #fun times ahead

[thebeautyoffanfics]

Can I request Hanako (or Amane Yugi), Teru Minamoto, and Akane Aoi (the male) with a female s/o who is literally invisible to people. (This totally not based on events that actually happened to me-)

Like some people, even her close friends, won’t even notice she’s there and if she’s has to asks something she tends to repeat it or stutter. She also tends to get forgetting or lost on school trips, etc.

This has happened for as long as she could remember and she’s use to it by now but sometimes it still hurts when they forget her

Headcanons please!

hanako x f!reader, teru minamoto x f!reader, akane aoi x f!reader

a/n: sure thing!! I feel like Hanako would understand that as a ghost, so I think I’ll write for him in his ghosty form! I hope that’s alright :)) thank you so much for requesting, and I hope these turn out alright!!

I’m really sorry if these are shorter or poorer than normal, and if they’re formatted strangely- I’m doing my best to get requests done on my phone (´ε｀”)

warnings: none?

word count: 1,414

Hanako <3

He understands, he understands more than anyone- so he thinks. I mean, he’s a ghost. He literally cannot be seen by anyone who isn’t an exorcist, near death, a fellow supernatural, or bound to him in some way.

Still… honestly, he gets pretty defensive over you-

They can’t hear him, but you can. (They can’t hear you, but he certainly can.) It’s honestly somewhat humorous, Hanako standing behind you, shouting that they’d better listen up!!

“IF YOU GUYS MAKE (Y/N) REPEAT HERSELF ONE MORE TIME?? Are they deaf, (Y/N)?? I think they’re deaf?????”

His reactions like that are half-joking-half-serious. He’s genuinely upset that they treat you like that- but he hopes that all his ranting and going on helps you to feel better somehow?

He can’t exactly follow you on trips, but! He makes Yashiro “Honorary (Y/N) Defense”! Meaning, since he can’t, she’ll defend you in his place!

You get interrupted or ignored? Hanako tells Yashiro to help you out, and (though she would any way) she’s raising her hand somewhat shyly- explaining that you were trying to talk.

Getting left behind on a field trip? Yashiro is sticking by your side! She turns around constantly, making sure that you keep up with her, and especially making sure that you get on the bus with the rest! As per Hanako’s request, and her own care for you, she’ll let you sit next to her.

Hanako is always very talkative, but he’s still very patient with you- he loves to have conversations with you, which is a big reason he doesn’t get why they treat you like that. You’re such a great person-! You’ve got such a cute voice-!!! Why don’t they listen-?!!!

To be honest, he finds your stutter kind of cute… he’s quite bold, so you being timid is something he doesn’t mind! Hanako doesn’t mind listening out for you- even if the other people aren’t in a relationship for you, isn’t it… basic human decency?? What happened to that???

“It’s really alright, Hanako. Things like this have happened since I was little- it hurts sometimes, but I’m mostly used to it.”

Hanako would then grab your shoulders gently, looking in your eyes with some determination!

“You shouldn’t have to be used to that!! I’m used to it because I’m dead, but you’re… alive. You can be heard and seen by everyone, yet they choose to not listen- it’s… ridiculous. I’m sorry that you have to deal with that, (Y/N)... really.”

Uncharacteristically soft moment, but it simply hits different for him due to personal experience. I’m sure as a human, the only time people saw him were when he was bullied, and now he’s- obviously- not seen by nearly anyone. It’s such a lonely feeling, and he genuinely hates that you can relate to it.

Teru Minamoto <3

It’s hard to not garner attention as Teru Minamoto’s girlfriend- so, people certainly acknowledge you once your relationship is made public/becomes obvious.

But! Before the entire school knew about the Prince having a girlfriend, Teru was… quite defensive over you- even before the two of you were a couple, he’d notice the way others seemed to step all over you. Ignoring you, interrupting you, forgetting about you.

Like Hanako, he doesn’t get it? You’ve got his attention, how do you not have anyone else’s? You’re so cute… and really do have a lovely voice, appearance, and overall are really pleasant to be around?? If anything you deserve more praise than he does-

He also doesn’t get it due to the fact that people acknowledge him a little too much-

Anyway, he tends to give that praise he thinks you deserve to you!

Meaning, he brags on you so much. Compliments you to your face, telling you how nice it is to converse with you- telling his family how lovely of a person you are. He even mentions it to classmates, which does start to earn others being more noticeable of your presence.

Not afraid to stick up for you in the least!! Who wouldn’t listen to Teru?? The moment someone interrupts, he’s politely making his way into the conversation- offering an “I’m sorry, I don’t think (Y/N) got her chance to speak.”

“Th-That’s okay, Teru. I appreciate it, but I’m used to things like that,” You told him after class, slightly embarrassed.

“Used to things like being ignored?”

“Yeah..?”

“...you shouldn’t have to be. I’d never be upset with you, but it does upset me that people have been so willing to pretend you aren’t there? I think you’re lovely, and nearly impossible to ignore. It’s simply confusing, I suppose.”

BRO if he, for some reason, isn’t on the field trip and you get forgotten- it’s game over for the chaperones will get their heads chewed off. Except he’ll be calm and collected while doing so- however, on the inside, he can’t express how upset he is.

“Is it not your job to make sure all the students are accounted for? What if (Y/N) had gotten lost? Do you not realize she could have been kidnapped? Should some low-life had decided to try anything strange, the blame would have been on you, and therefore our entire school. What would that do for both your’s and the school’s reputation?”

If he’s on the trip? You won’t be getting forgotten <3 Even you were to get distracted for a moment, he’s grabbing your hand and making sure you stay caught up with the class. Sits with you on the bus, and makes absolutely sure that you’re safe and with him!!

Akane Aoi <3

He worships the very ground you walk on. We all know how he treated Aoi? Well, now that’s how he treats you- maybe a bit less exaggerated and dramatic, but all that love and more is there!

So, he’s admiring you, and sees that you keep opening your mouth in an attempt to speak- only to have someone interrupt you, not even acknowledging that you’re there??

“Hey, (Y/N), what’s up?”

“O-oh, I was just trying to ask them something…”

“Oi, you heard her. Shut up for a moment and let (Y/N) get her question in.”

Most are somewhat aware of how scary Akane can be, so they’ll certainly listen whenever he’s there. Heck, people occasionally keep an extra eye open if they know he’s around- making sure they don’t unintentionally look past you.

If you dislike his very direct method, he’ll try to be nicer to others about it. But, he can’t help but get defensive- like our other boys, he admires you so much, and enjoys talking with you so much, that- by this point- others are simply missing out?? Like, it’s basically their loss for treating you like that. And it’s his mission to shower you in love and admiration to a point where others do the same- platonically of course, and boys better rethink anything that isn’t strictly “wow (Y/N) is cool, it’s cool that she’s taken by Akane.”

Cos, as we all know, if someone even says “oh, (Y/N) probably makes a cute girlfriend” it’s game over. RIP unknowing student, he had no mercy bashing their skull in </3

“Akane, it’s really fine, you know? Things like this happen been happening since... forever. I’m just not easily noticed, I suppose. I’m used to it!”

“Hmm... well, get un-used to it. You’ve got the most beautiful presence and voice of anyone I know! And, I want the class- for everyone- to be able to acknowledge that. You shouldn’t have to repeat yourself constantly, nor be ignored like that. Not on my watch, at least.”

You won’t be getting forgotten. He’s ahead of Teru, ahahahaaaa!!! If he isn’t on the field trip, he’s telling someone who will be to keep an eye out for you “or else <3”. The person wouldn’t even bother to question it- just nod and keep an eye out for you constantly. They even offer to have you sit with them! How sweet! Glad to know they value their skulls!!

If he’s on the trip, like the others, he’s keeping an eye out for you constantly. He’ll hold your hand the entire time, stopping as you pleased, but keeping an eye out for the group. He wants you to see what you want, so you will- all while staying with the class, or at least close to the class. If he, for some reason, were to lose sight of the class, he takes comfort in the fact that you wouldn’t be lost alone.

#anon #request #headcanons #x reader #f!reader #x f!reader #tbhk #jshk #toilet bound hanako kun #jibaku shounen hanako kun #Akane aoi #teru minamoto #hanako #tbhk x reader #jshk x reader #toilet bound hanako kun x reader #jibaku shounen hanako kun x reader #akane aoi x reader #teru minamoto x reader #Hanako x reader #akane aoi headcanons #teru minamoto headcanons #Hanako headcanons

[frostedfaves]

Dark Paradise

Masterlist

Pairing: dark!WandaNat x fem!reader

Summary: You meet the infamous Avengers on spring break with your best friend Peter, and two of them seem to adore you more than expected. Requested here by my lovely 🐞anon.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY!!! dark themes, manipulation, mind control, blackmailing, age gap (reader is 21), dubcon (saying this just to be safe because Wanda uses her powers for evil a lot here), smut: oral, fingering, penetration/sex toy use, voyeurism (kinda), edging, overstimulation (if I forgot something please let me know!)

A/N: hi this is 6k words, which is the longest single fic I’ve ever written/posted here haha. also the end is not technically the end, if you know what I mean. anyway this took forever to write so enjoy this super far from canon fic and please tell me what you thought!! (also if you’re on my taglist and you weren’t tagged it’s because your age wasn’t in your bio)

-

“Here, let me take that for you,” Peter offers when he notices you headed toward the car, and you hand your suitcase to him with a smile.

“Thanks, P.”

You close the car door behind you after getting in on the passenger side, instantly reaching for his phone resting on the dashboard once you were buckled in. The two of you had an unspoken rule that you controlled the music whenever you traveled together, so his library was filled with various playlists you’d created simply because you didn’t trust him not to listen to the same five songs for the rest of his life.

“This is different,” Peter comments as he gets in on the driver’s side and catches the opening notes to an upbeat song. “I thought you were going to go with something calmer to help you sleep, like you usually do.”

“Well, I’m not usually going to meet the Avengers, so I’m too nervous to sleep.” You turn to pout at him as he drives off. “Is it too late to cancel?”

“Don’t even think about it. If I show up without you, everyone will think you’re imaginary.”

“Do they think you can’t make any friends outside of Ned?” you question as you open a bottle of water. “Because they’re not wrong.”

“I can make friends!” Peter whines and a quiet snorting sound escapes you. 

“You can’t use me as an example.”

“Why not?”

“Because we’re not actually friends.”

He picks up on your teasing nature and rolls his eyes, causing you to laugh as you lean back and settle into your seat more. You had well over three hours to stress about spending a week with the world’s most popular superheroes, and you’d rather be comfortable while you do so.

-

“Wake up, we’re here!”

Your eyes fly open at the sound of Peter’s voice, and any of the nerves that left long enough to let you sleep made a U-turn and hit you again, full force. Sitting up straight in the seat, you practice breathing properly while stretching and taking a look around as he pulls into the garage.

“Are you okay?” Peter asks once he parks, placing a hand over yours as he meets your gaze and you smile.

“I’ll be fine, P. I’m not gonna miss out on hanging out with you just because your super family is super intimidating.”

“Good. Besides, it won’t even be that bad! I’m willing to bet $1 million that they’ll love you.”

“I appreciate your optimism,” you tell him as the two of you get out of the car. “But you’re going to regret that bet when I use your money to retire early in some faraway rural town.”

Peter carried both suitcases as you made your way to an elevator, and you jumped when you suddenly heard a male voice.

“Welcome, Mr. Parker and Ms. L/N.”

“What is that?” you questioned as you faced Peter with wide eyes and he chuckled. 

“You’re hearing Jarvis, Mr. Stark’s AI. Hey Jarvis, can you take us to the common room, please?”

“Right away, Mr. Parker.”

“This is so cool,” you comment as you look around the suddenly moving elevator. “How does it know my name?”

“Knowing everything is kind of its job, I guess.”

“Underoos!” a voice calls as soon as the doors open, quickly revealing itself to belong to Tony Stark as his gaze lands on you next. “So she is real.”

“I told you!” Peter defends as you step off the elevator together. “Mr. Stark, this is Y/N.”

“Nice to meet you, kid,” Tony greets you with a shake of your hand. “I’m glad he found you. I was starting to worry that he’d build a robot to spend the rest of his life with.”

“I’m just his best friend, so it’s still possible.”

“Is this your friend, Peter?” Steve cuts off Peter’s response as he enters the room, moving to shake your hand next. “I’m Steve. Nice to meet you.”

“Okay, I’m going to show her to our rooms and then we’ll be back for dinner,” Peter tells everyone once you’d been introduced to Pepper, Bruce and Clint as well, and you’re about to head for the elevator again when someone interrupts.

“How about we take her down to her room instead?”

Your eyes widen as you watch none other than Natasha Romanoff and Wanda Maximoff enter the room hand in hand. Natasha’s hair seemed much longer than the last time she’d been in the public eye, but her all-knowing smirk was just the same and her green eyes were even more piercing in person. You noticed a bit of red glowing in Wanda’s eyes, which faded as she probably realized you’d seen, and you couldn’t help but wonder if that meant she hated you already.

“I know what you’re up to, Red.” Tony seemed accusatory as he pointed a finger at the pair. “You can’t bribe her into helping you cheat tonight.”

“Maybe I planned on giving her tips for surviving this testosterone filled tower.” 

Natasha steps forward and grabs your hand with her free one, and with a flick of her wrist, Wanda has your suitcase floating in front of you as they lead you into the elevator.

“Sorry to whisk you away like that,” Wanda apologizes as the doors close with her head tilted to see you past Natasha. “We’re just excited to meet a new woman here.”

“No, it’s okay!” you insist breathlessly, your nerves slowly returning as Natasha lightly squeezes your hand. “I’m actually really excited to meet the two of you.”

“You know who we are?”

“Well, I wouldn’t say that I know you personally, but I know that you’re one of the original team members.” You make eye contact briefly with Natasha before turning to Wanda. “And because the news stations somehow get ahold of everything, I know you joined after you helped everyone stop Ultron before he could create that indestructible body and destroy the world.”

“Yes, that’s true. Although I wish I could’ve saved my brother, too.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you lost him...or that you even had a brother.”

“It’s okay,” Wanda assures you with a smile as she lets go of Natasha, shifting to the other side of the elevator to grab your free hand. “I asked Fury to keep Pietro a secret because I didn’t want to see or hear any negative opinions from people that never even met him.”

“And we have plenty of time to get to know each other,” Natasha chimes in as the doors open to reveal a new setting. “This is our floor. We set up a spare bedroom here so we can spend time together away from the boys...when you’re not with Peter, of course.”

“Yeah, that’d be great!” 

They lead you past their living room and kitchen, and you shamelessly admire the simple decor with little personal touches spread about. Turning into a hallway, Natasha walks ahead of you and Wanda to open a door to a bedroom.

“What do you think?” she asks with a smile that widens upon seeing your expression. “I’m guessing it’s good, then.”

“It’s perfect!” you cry out as you walk past to enter the room, immediately noticing the eggshell colored walls trimmed with your favorite color along the borders. “Wow, this is four times the size of a normal bedroom. Wait a minute.”

“Do you like it?” Wanda asks when she sees you pick up the glass figurine on the nightstand. “Peter mentioned your love of this animal and I have a whole collection of them from different places.”

“Like it? I love it! I have the same one in my dorm room!”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I can get you a different one.” She steps forward as she brings your suitcase to the floor beside the bed and you hug the small object close to your chest. 

“Like I said, it’s perfect,” you assure her with a grin, which brings one to her own face.

“Well, I’m glad you’re happy with the set up. When you’re ready to head up to dinner, we’ll be waiting by the elevator. Also, if you ever need anything, our room is right across the hall.”

Natasha points to the closed door a few feet away, and you acknowledge her statement with a nod before they leave the room, closing your door nearly all the way behind them. You flop down on the bed with a dreamy sigh as you gaze up at the ceiling with a night sky painted on it.

“I don’t think I’ll ever want to leave this place.”

-

On the elevator ride up to join everyone for dinner, Natasha and Wanda take turns asking you questions about your classes and any friends you’d made, what you liked to do when you weren’t studying. You had to admit that the level of interest they had with you was shocking but flattering, especially when they insisted you sit between them at the table to continue your conversation.

“You don’t seem to be nervous anymore,” Peter acknowledges as you sit down, and Wanda faces you immediately.

“Were you nervous about meeting us?”

“Well, yeah,” you answer timidly, avoiding catching anyone’s curious glances by directing a glare toward Peter. “You might be normal people in here, but to the rest of the world, you’re portrayed as powerful and untouchable beings.”

“Maybe when they’re not talking about how much damage we’ve caused,” Bruce mumbles under his breath as the elevator doors opened again. 

“I’m here, I’m here!” a voice calls as footsteps hurry toward the dining area, and Sam Wilson is revealed as he rounds the corner. “Sorry, I’m late. I was--”

“On a date, we know. You only told us that 500 times.”

“Don’t be jealous, old man. You’re married.” Sam grins at Clint as he sits next to him before his attention turns to you. “Do we have a newbie?”

“No, Mr. Wilson. This is my best friend, Y/N.”

“Call me Sam, kid.” He smiles at you as he goes for his silverware, and you’re just about to acknowledge him when his expression suddenly turns serious. “I’m sorry. You’re not a kid. You’re an independent and capable adult, and I should address you as such.”

“What the hell was that?”

“I don’t know.” Sam clears his throat and shakes his head as if he was clearing his mind. “I just suddenly felt the need to correct myself…You have any powers we should know about, Y/N?”

“No!” you quickly respond with widened eyes. “I wasn’t going to say anything, actually. I’m pretty used to older people calling me kid by now.”

From your left side, Natasha asks Clint to recall an embarrassing tale for you and the table livens up again, but you can’t seem to move past the unsettling way Sam shifted gears from calm and casual to uptight and disciplined. The image stayed with you through the rest of dinner even after he seemed to fully recover, until dishes were cleared away and replaced with games, and you suddenly had a lot more to focus on.

“I just don’t think it’s fair that he gets to be on your team again when I haven’t had him once.”

“Is anything fair with the guy who could use his personalized AI to cheat for him?”

“Could I do that? Yes. But have I done that? Maybe.”

“Wanna grab some fresh air with us?” Natasha suddenly asks you, causing you to frown.

“Aren’t we about to play another game?”

“It’ll take them another half hour before they finally decide something,” Wanda assures you as her fingers thread through yours gently. “We have plenty of time, and they won’t even notice we’re gone.”

They lead you by the hand to the elevator once more, going up a few floors before leading you out onto a balcony. Because you were so much higher than most of the surrounding buildings, there was an incredible view of the sun that was probably minutes away from disappearing to the other side of the world. The air is chillier than when you’d arrived, but you had to admit that standing in the cool breeze is worth a few goosebumps on your skin. Your hands are released as you reach a bench near the ledge, and you climb over it to sit as the other two women settle on either side of you.

“Why did Peter decide to share his secret with you?”

“Technically he didn’t,” you recall with a laugh. “He’d gone out to deal with something that activated his spider sense or whatever and I came to his dorm room to sleep after an exam because I was too tired to walk all the way to my place. Anyway, I walk in at the same time he’s coming back in through the window, and I swear we both sat there for a full two minutes before either of us could think of anything to say.”

“It’s still very nice of you to keep such a big secret for him,” Natasha praises, and your laughter quiets down as you take in her words.

“I guess I just know what it feels like to not want your life to change drastically because of one thing.” Your gaze shifts between the women for a moment. “That reminds me, I wanted to ask--”

“Wait, look at this!” Wanda quickly cuts you off with an enthusiastic grin. “You’re about to witness one of my favorite things about living here.”

She directs you to lean over and look at the streets as the sun finally disappears over the horizon, and you can’t help the small gasp that escapes you. Street lights begin turning on at what seems to be the center of the city and quickly spreading, increasing the radius of well-lit neighborhoods by the second. It was a mesmerizing sight that--until every lamp was on--nearly made you forget the question you were building toward.

“That was so cool!” you express honestly before clearing your throat awkwardly. “So I wanted to ask if the two of you were dating...or in a relationship or whatever. I mean, I don’t want to assume anything of course, just wondering because you share a room and floor, and you seem to be really into holding hands.”

“Well, I’d never really been into holding hands or a lot of other forms of affection before I met Wanda, but she seemed to flip some switch inside of me.” Natasha admitted with a bashful chuckle as she glanced at Wanda before turning to study you. “And your hands are so perfect to hold.”

“To answer your question, we are together.” Wanda rests a hand on your thigh and casts a sweet smile in your direction when you face her again. “Natasha was the first to give me a chance after everything with Ultron, and initially I thought I was just feeling grateful to receive some type of positive attention from someone other than Pietro. It wasn’t until Tash called me out on staring at her lips that I realized I wanted more than friendship.”

“The only reason I did was to confirm she was feeling the same things I’d finally come to terms with myself.” Natasha chuckles as Wanda sends over a bit of red mist to squeeze her own thigh. “What about you, love?”

“What about me?”

“Do you think you’re feeling more than friendship for Peter?”

“Oh no,” you quickly denied with a chuckle. “He’s the perfect example of a great boyfriend, but not my boyfriend. Plus I’d rather not have the same experience as MJ did.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know, the ‘close friends to a relationship that ends with each person pretending the other doesn’t exist’ experience. I’d rather not.”

“Yeah, that does sound messy,” Natasha sighs as she subtly rests her hand on your other thigh. “So you’re not looking for a great boyfriend. What are you looking for then?”

“Nothing really, at least until I finish school, but having a girlfriend would be nice. I’d like to be with someone that respects me and can take care of themselves when I’m not around, because I tried the ‘caring for someone’ thing and it sucks when they don’t put in the same effort that you do.”

“Maybe you should try someone older, more mature,” Natasha suggests as she shifts to squeeze your knee lightly, and you start to feel a bit nervous about where she’s going with this. “Maybe two people that already have their shit together and would go to the ends of the earth to please you.”

“Okay, um…” You push both of their hands away with a bit of difficulty. “You both seem great and you’re incredibly attractive, but I’m not really interested.”

“Don’t worry about it, detka.” Natasha pushes your shoulder down as you try to get up, and Wanda cups your cheek with her hand.

“You may not be interested now…” She stands with Natasha and leans in to kiss your forehead, letting her lips linger on your skin as she continues. “But you will be.”

She pulls away and winks before lacing her fingers through Natasha’s as they leave the balcony, and you gasp in air as the tension they’d built seems to exit behind them. You finally decide to head back once you’ve taken a few minutes to catch your breath and calm your shaking limbs, but you wonder how long the calm will truly last.

-

You found yourself waking up suddenly and practically flying into a sitting position as if someone had pulled you up, but luckily the room is empty. You sit for a moment to catch your breath and survey your surroundings to assure you’re truly alone, and you notice your door is cracked right before you hear an unidentifiable sound.

“Fuck.”

Despite every fiber of your being screaming at you as one would do to a character in a horror film, you decide to climb out of bed to investigate what you were hearing, justifying your actions with the excuse of seeing if your floor-mates were in danger, as if you could save them. A few seconds after opening your door fully and peeking out made you realize that they were more than okay.

“Fuck! Right there, please don’t stop.”

“Such a dirty mouth, malyshka.”

You’re quick to return the door to its cracked position, leaning against the nearby wall with wide eyes as you attempt to process the image across the hall. The bedroom door sits wide open, giving you the chance to examine every inch of bare skin of the two women spread across the bed, Wanda resting on her arched back with her hands in Natasha’s red hair buried between her legs. Her moans seem to raise in volume, pitch and frequency as she’s brought closer and closer to the edge, and you ignore the warm feeling in your lower abdomen as you hurry back to bed and throw a pillow over your exposed ear.

-

“Good morning.”

Your free hand quickly shoots upward to catch your water glass as it slipped through your fingers in your moment of shock, and you try not to make a deal of hearing two sets of footsteps headed toward the kitchen.

“How’d you sleep last night? I know how scary it can be to rest your eyes in a new place.”

“I think I did pretty well,” you answer quietly as you step away from the fridge and lean against a section of the counter that faces out into the rest of the room. “The bed’s really nice.”

“You’re lying,” Wanda accuses as she crosses the room, eyes turning red and hands lifting toward your face.

“What are you--”

“Couldn’t sleep because of us, right?” She chuckles when you go limp under her touch, and Natasha ducks between the two of you to save your glass for the second time. “Did you enjoy hearing us that much?”

“You did sound really good,” you tell her with a drowsy smile as she pins you against the counter to keep you from falling.

“I bet you wish you were in my place, don’t you?” Her tone is light and teasing at first, becoming a bit stern as she shifts to push her thigh between your legs and you instantly roll your hips against the pressure. “Or maybe you want to taste me while Natasha fucks you?”

“No.”

“No?!” she fires back immediately, leaving a red mist around your temples as she grabs your waist with both hands to keep you grinding against her. “You mean you don’t want to cum right now?”

“Well, now that you mention it…”

A breathy moan escapes you as your eyes flutter closed, and if your head wasn’t being forcefully held in place, it would’ve tipped backward. You feel what must be Natasha’s fingertips grazing along your jaw and tracing a line down the side of your neck and toward your shoulder, repeating the gentle motion as goosebumps appeared all over the exposed skin.

“Is everyone decent?”

The fog behind your eyes seems to clear in seconds, and you blink in confusion when you open your eyes to see Natasha and Wanda making coffee nearby. You try to recall even coming into the kitchen, but everything from the moment you stepped into the bathroom to get ready is a blur, so you shake your head and reach for your glass of water on the counter as Natasha responds.

“Come in, Peter.”

“Morning, everyone,” Peter greets cheerfully as he enters the kitchen, his grin falling when his eyes land on you. “Are you okay?”

You open your mouth with the full intention of telling him that you are not okay, not when you were missing at least an hour of memory, and bits of last night were slipping away from you too. But before you could speak, a cold feeling seems to pass through the back of your skull to slip into your brain, and a switch flips.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” you respond with a chuckle. “You worry too much, spiderling.”

“The world’s a stressful place,” he grumbles when you playfully ruffle his hair. “Anyway, are you ready to go soon?”

“Where are you headed?” Natasha quickly asks with a frown. “Y/N hasn’t even had breakfast yet.”

“We’re meeting Aunt May, so we’ll eat with her.”

“I just have to grab my bag,” you explain before heading down the hall to your temporary room, feeling the chilly sensation leaving you as you get further away from the kitchen, and it thankfully doesn’t return when you head back. “Ready.”

“Have fun!” Natasha calls as Peter heads for the elevator again, quickly grabbing your wrist once he’s out of sight. “See you tonight, printsessa.”

Her hand quickly shifts to grip the back of your neck as she leans in to kiss your cheek, and the two women are wearing sweet smiles as you turn away from them to catch up with Peter, attempting to shake the shell-shocked expression from your features.

“You sure you’re good?”

“I’m fine,” you insist as the doors close, in hopes that you really would be fine.

-

Meeting Peter’s aunt was much more of a pleasant experience than you expected, and it was obvious she adored you by the way she spoke to you, although part of you felt she was just happy Peter had more people around to love him. Your day was cut a bit short when MJ unexpectedly approached Peter, requesting to talk to him, and Aunt May offered to drive you back to the tower so you both could escape that awkward mess of a conversation.

“It was so great to meet you today,” you tell her with a grin as you take off your seatbelt.

“Likewise, honey. You have my number so just call me if you ever need anything, okay?”

She pulls you into a hug over the middle console and you thank her again for the ride as you get out of the car, trying not to seem too nervous when you notice Natasha and Wanda standing in the lobby. Your plan was to walk past them without speaking, but you should’ve known that wouldn’t work.

“Why was she hugging you?” Natasha asks coldly as you enter the building and you sigh.

“She was just saying goodbye--wait. Why am I explaining myself to you?”

You keep walking until they’re no longer in your peripheral, stopping abruptly as a red mist surrounds your legs, and your eye-rolling is cut short when Wanda appears in front of you and grabs your chin harshly.

“If Tash asks you a question, you answer.”

“Without attitude,” Natasha adds, which makes you want to roll your eyes again.

“Sorry, I didn’t get the rules handbook when I arrived. Can I go now?”

“You know what?” Wanda cuts off Natasha’s angry response with a smirk. “You can go.”

The red mist surrounding you disappeared, and despite the suspicious feeling that washed over you, you continued on toward the elevator with your head held high. You refused to let them get to you.

-

It was subtle at first. A slight tingling between your legs that you couldn’t seem to get rid of. In the very beginning, you were worried that something was wrong until you realized where the feeling was coming from when it turned into slow circles around your clit as you caught up with Peter in his room. By dinner, there was the added sensation of fingers curling inside you at a steady pace, and you hoped no one would notice your hips slightly bucking under the table as you attempted to repeatedly chase a release that never came.

A movie follows dinner today, and you make sure to cover yourself with a large blanket because you were still being edged and you couldn’t stop moving at this point. You even try to slide your hand into your sweatpants to finish the job yourself, and your jaw clenches in anger every time your fingers lock up because you know who’s responsible.

“Okay, you win!” you announce as you walk into the kitchen on Natasha and Wanda’s private floor, not missing the look shared between the two women. “I’m sorry I was rude earlier. Can you please just stop teasing me?”

“How about we help you finish instead?”

You should decline. You should just say ‘no’ because letting them finish you off tonight will turn into an attachment that you know you don’t want, nor are you ready for. Inviting them in will be equivalent to selling your soul, and you’re not sure you want to put a price on it. But the ache below your stomach is persistent, and if they won’t let you touch yourself, someone has to do it.

“Fine.”

“Don’t be so grumpy about it,” Wanda teases as she grabs your hand and starts leading you toward their bedroom. “I promise you won’t regret it.”

She pushes you back onto the surprisingly large bed as soon as you’re close enough, instructing you to take off your shirt and bra while she watches. Once your top half is completely exposed, she leans forward to run her hands from your shoulders down toward your nipples, circling them with her thumbs until they harden.

“I don’t like being teased.”

“Oh, you don’t?” she asks in a mocking tone as she reaches for the band of your sweatpants and pulls them down, placing her palm over the wet spot in your panties. “Then what’s this?”

“Please,” you beg through a quiet moan, bucking your hips again when she presses her thumb against your clit through the fabric. “Please just fuck me already.”

“Patience, detka.”

You watch with wide eyes as Natasha and Wanda both strip away their own sweatpants, revealing the toys tied to their legs. Natasha goes to untie hers while Wanda uses her powers to rip away your ruined panties in one fluid motion.

“There she is.”

Natasha puts her hand on Wanda’s back and forces her to bend over, and you bite your lip as her eyes flutter closed and mouth falls open while Natasha thrusts into her. You’re just about to grab Wanda’s hand to lead her where you want, when her eyes open suddenly with a glowing red surrounding her pupils, and your wrists are bound together over your head by an invisible force.

“Did you forget who’s in charge here?”

“Don’t get too cocky, malyshka,” Natasha reminds her as she grabs a fistful of her hair and slams into her, causing Wanda to moan and giggle at the same time.

“My apologies, Tash.”

You couldn’t help your sigh of relief as Wanda finally slid two fingers inside of you, her thrusts deepening each time as Natasha fucked her toward you with her hands on her hips. The sounds coming from your mouth and between your legs were embarrassingly loud, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care as she brought you closer and closer to the edge, until a loud whine escaped you as she removed her fingers and delivered a slap to your glistening folds.

“Tell me who this belongs to,” she orders through her own moans, holding you down when you begin grinding into her hand. “I’m gonna cum regardless of what you do, so you’d better answer. Be a good girl like I know you can.”

“Yours!” you cry out finally, sighing when Natasha leans into your line of sight with a brow raised. “It’s yours and Natasha’s.”

“That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

She slips back into you without warning, and your back arches off the bed as she finally brings you to orgasm. She continues to thrust into you as you whine and squirm away, luckily slowing down and finally stopping as Natasha makes her cum a minute later, leaving the strap inside of her as they both catch their breath. Wanda pulls out of you and sits up to lean against her, holding her hand up between them as they both clean your cum off her fingers with their tongues, and you sit there clenching around nothing as you watch.

“You seem tired,” Natasha comments as her eyes land on you again.

“Too bad we’re not done.”

Wanda flips you onto your stomach with a quick motion of her fingers, using her hands to pull you by the waist until you’re on your knees at the edge of the bed, and she holds one side of your waist as she delivers a slap to your ass this time. Her touch lingers as she pulls away to free her own strap, and you nearly fall over when you feel the tip of the toy rub against your clit.

“Wait, let me fuck her this time.”

You hear their soft laughter as they switch places, sharing a kiss in the process, and you gasp when a hand wraps around your neck and pulls you up against Natasha’s chest.

“I like having you this close to me, printsessa,” she whispers in your ear, chuckling when you melt against her as she pushes the tip of her strap into you. “How many times do you think I can get you to cum?”

Her grip on your throat is loose as she allows you to adjust to the size, tightening suddenly when she slams into you once, twice, until every thrust is at a rough pace that you wouldn’t be able to handle if she wasn’t holding you against her by the waist. You feel that same tingling circling your clit again, occasionally traveling upward to tease your nipples as well, and it wasn’t long before you were releasing a strangled scream as you climaxed.

Natasha eventually stops thrusting into you as your legs shake, and you breathe out another sigh of relief when she allows you to fall onto the mattress. However, the relief is short-lived when you realize that she only paused to let Wanda push into her from behind, and it wasn’t long before the two of them found a rhythm that was pleasing them and ruining you.

Your wrists are freed as Natasha pulls out of you some minutes later, and you collapse onto one side of the bed with your body aching a bit from a third orgasm, your eyes only halfway open as you watch the pair. They remove the straps from their waists and set them aside, and you become a bit more alert when you notice Natasha grab what seems to be a double-ended dildo.

“No more. I can’t,” you mumble tiredly as your wrists are bound by Wanda’s power again.

“One more, and you can,” she tells you as she flops onto the bed beside you, and that red mist surrounds her fingers again as she guides you onto your knees to hover above her face. “You wanted to cum, so you don’t get to run from this.”

Her hands grab your waist and pull you closer, and you release a shuddering moan as her tongue runs past your hole and over your clit, teasing it a few times with the tip of her tongue before diving in to wrap her lips around it. She alternates between sucking your clit and slipping inside you as Natasha climbs on the bed behind you to position herself with the new toy. 

“Fuck,” Wanda attempts to say once Natasha begins thrusting, and you fall forward as the vibration of her moans become too much, whining when Natasha slides her hands over your breasts and pulls you back up again.

“Take it all like a good girl.”

She keeps pulling until your head drops against her, and she moans against your neck while she kisses and sucks on your skin, bouncing faster on Wanda who groans loudly in response as she attempts to match each thrust. The hums of her voice has you grinding against her tongue, and you yelp when Natasha bites down just as Wanda brings you over the edge. She keeps going despite your protests, managing to get you to cum once more before they finally do.

You lie there with your bones feeling like jelly as you’re covered with a blanket minutes after everyone’s bathroom trip, too tired to even fight for sleeping in your own bed as Natasha and Wanda slide in on either side of you.

“You did so well tonight, detka,” Wanda praises as she strokes your cheek with a loving stare. “I can tell you’ll be a great addition to our relationship. I knew it from the moment I saw you.”

“I’m not doing this again,” you insist as the smile fades from her expression. “I’m not getting in a relationship with two women that don’t take ‘no’ for an answer, and I’d prefer sleeping in my own bed.”

“You’re already in a relationship with us, printsessa,” Natasha growls as she shoves you back down when you try to get up, and you push her hand away.

“There’s nothing you can say that’ll make me want to be with you.”

“It’s not about what you want to do. It’s about what you have to do.” She grabs your phone from the nightstand, and you’re somehow not even surprised when she unlocks it on the first try. “Because it’d be a shame if someone was to tell Peter about all the nudes you have of him.”

You snatch the phone from her grip, eyes widening as you scroll through your camera roll, finding naked pictures of Peter scattered throughout it. You check the date on the oldest one and began to feel nauseous when you saw it was taken not even a month after the two of you met.

“Don’t think you’ll be deleting those either, because we can replace them and make things worse.” Her smile was falsely sweet and troubling as she grabbed your chin to force you to make eye contact. “We’ve gone this long without having you, and we’ll do whatever it takes not to lose you.”

-

Tags: @cordeliaswhore @egotisticalstoner @muralskins @natasha-danvers @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @madamevirgo @teenwonder @honeyvenable @slut-for-nat

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[phoenixyfriend]

Time Travel ft. Leia and Vader

(Helped by @atagotiak)

I was reading a bunch of different time travel fics, and my brain slotted in that one "Vader hands over the Empire to Leia and is now her most devoted sycophant" dynamic and mixed it with the "Luke and Vader time-travel and Vader does the right thing but only because it would make Luke sad if he didn't."

I landed on "Leia time travels to prequels era, but her least favorite family member has also traveled with her, though it takes him a few months to find her because he has less resources without the entire Imperial Navy, but he's still a scary Sith in all black with a breathing mask and intimidating cape."

"Tiny angry lady who wants to force democracy and her giant Sith father whom she hates but has resigned herself to pointing at threats like a tank who inexplicably loves her" is a delightful dynamic.

The first few months included a lot of concern about "why do you know so much about Sith if you're not trained or looking to be one" and then Vader shows up and calls her 'daughter' and she insults him and it's like "Oh. That explains it."

Council Member: We have a Sith in the Temple. Vader: Former Sith. Leia: Listen. He is your best chance against Sidious. Also, do you want Dooku dead? Vader can make him dead. Council Member: Your father i-- Leia, scrunching up her face: Don't call him that.

Like Leia is deep in conversation when the Temple starts panicking because Vader just. Showed up? He snuck in, somehow? So Palpatine wouldn't catch him on video entering through the front door? And people try to keep her away from the trouble, because there's an entire array of Jedi Masters to deal with this Surprise Sith, except she can sense exactly which Sith it is and once she shouts "oh you have got to be kidding me!" she just starts running and, well, it's Leia. Nobody can stop her.

(Leia does have less combat training, at least less force-assisted combat training, than the Jedi. But then the Jedi don’t want to hurt here here. She's not fighting her way down, either, she's just running really fast and all the best fighters already left. They had a head start. So Leia's mostly running past random padawans and the like.)

She shoves her way to the front of the group of Masters who. Well, they're certainly ready to attack. But Vader is just standing there. Doing nothing. Still intimidating as fuck but he's not doing anything.

And then Leia bursts onto the scene like "You motherfucker."

She hits her head on a clipboard and whines because UGH he's a walking WMD and they could REALLY use him against Palpatine but also. She hates him so much.

She tries to hand him off to the Jedi council but he insists that he will only take orders from Leia herself.

Jedi: Wait, what. Leia, completely ignoring them: Did you follow me here? Vader, through the mechanical wheezing: I have no loyalty to my master and no empire to serve. You are all that I have left. Leia: Me? Me? I'm all that you have left? You committed a genocide that killed all the family I had except for the twin brother you later mutilated! Jedi: Wait what Vader, going to one knee: I pledge my loyalty and blade to you and only you, daughter. Leia, ready to explode: I. I just. Jedi, some of whom really want to say things but are slowly realizing that they just accidentally acquired a Sith Lord by proxy: What. Leia: I hate you so much but I can't even get rid of you, you're too useful. Vader: I live to serve. Leia: Yeah. Got that. Fuck. Someone get him a full medical rundown, I don't know the last time that mess of a life support system was updated. Jedi, agitated again: WHAT Leia: Listen, I don't like him, but I'm not stupid enough to throw away the second most dangerous person in the universe when I can point him at the most dangerous person in the universe. Especially not if he's going to listen to me. Jedi: But... he's a Sith. Leia: Please trust me when I say this: you might be able to take him down eventually, but he will take dozens of you down with him, and right now he's... honestly, I'm pretty sure he's more depressed than malicious. Jedi: You hate him. I can feel it. Leia: Yes, but I can be professional about it. Vader: They have not yet d-- Leia: Nope! No talking! Not until I've had a chance to process this mess!

There is a whole lot of Leia snapping at Vader to stop it whenever he starts giving off vibes like he wants to take the most violent shortcut possible.

She is not the gentle hand that Luke would be.

Leia isn't a Jedi or working for them but she's wormed her way into being an ally. They don't 100% trust her, especially not with Vader just showing up and declaring her family but like

How do you say no to a WMD walking into your house and saying "I will fight the monster you cower from at night."

There's a lot of Leia snapping off an admonishment that sounds just a little too odd and then when questioned she just says "He knows what he did."

tbh I'm not sure how long it takes for them to tell anyone that Anakin is Vader. They might hold it off in hopes that Anakin can just retire to be Mr. Amidala after the war is over.

Well, Leia hopes. Vader just lets Leia make that call and then glowers at his younger self every time they're in the same room.

I do feel like Leia tells Obi-Wan the truth first

Imagine. Imagine a Vader who’s past still isn’t known. But has gotten somewhat comfortable around the Jedi (not really but the bar for what counts and comfortable for him is low). And Obi-Wan habitually banters with darksiders, right? If Vader’s guard is down for a moment and he, without thinking, references an inside joke...

Might be the most fun in terms of ways to tell Obi-Wan "We're time travelers and Vader is what happens if you let Palpatine drive Anakin off the edge"

If Vader has decided to pledge himself to her orders after destroying her planet, then fine. She can work with that. She's not going to be happy about it, but she can make it work.

The Jedi Temple hates having Vader anywhere nearby but he is actually very good at hiding himself from people, including Palpatine And for all that Leia seems perpetually irritated with her apparent bodyguard, he does seem to listen to her.

Jedi council: We still haven't figured out how to handle Dooku Leia: Do you know his location? Jedi council: Yes. Leia: [sigh] Leia: Vader, deal with it. Alive if possible.

(Leia does need to clarify an acceptable level of violence against the people protecting Dooku.) (She needs to clarify... many things.)

Leia always says "Vader" and one time a poor fool just asks why she doesn't call him dad and she snarls out "He is not the man that raised me, and I am glad for it."

Someone less foolish later prods more compassionately and she lets them know she was adopted and didn't properly meet Vader except in passing until she was nineteen.

"And then he tortured you." "And then he tortured me, yes." "Damn." "Didn't even find out we were related until a few years later when he chopped my brother's arm off." "You... wow." "I know."

At least one exchange that is L: You mean when you tortured me? A: He did what. V: I was not aware of our relation at that time. L: Not the point! I am fully aware of your interrogation methods and I refuse to let you be the one to acquire the evidence for-- A: Wait no go back he tortured you? L: Move on, please, we already have. A: That means I'm... oh Force, I'm going to torture my own daughter what in the actual fu-- L: We're moving on.

(“I end up torturing my own daughter” If Leia’s feeling especially spiteful I can see her saying “you mutilate your own son too”)

Concept: Leia is very free with traumatizing details of her past re:Vader and Anakin thinks that it sucks but doesn’t think much of it bc Sith. And then some time later he finds out...

(I love characters who use the traumatizing details of their past to shut down conversations.)

It's such a wonderfully horrifying concept for him to try to awkwardly comfort this girl he kind of knows because having a Sith for a dad sounds like it would suck and Leia seems nice, even if she's kind of weird and uncomfortable around Anakin, but he saw her flinch around a few other tall people wearing black robes the way she stiffens around Vader so maybe it's just that!

It is not.

Vader does get a significant amount of medical treatment. Including a bunch of "holy shit, that's a lot of drugs" and similar. There is so much lightning damage.

hnnng I'm just really in love with the image of Tiny Tiny Leia sitting behind a desk for some fancy negotiation, the picture of professionalism, while Vader just stands behind her shoulder, looming, glaring expressionless death at whoever came to speak with his baby girl.

Not that he would call her that, because she'd just hate him more and he's really not sure how to fix that problem, other than doing whatever she asks with no complaints and hoping she appreciates it.

Vader: [looks at children wandering by, has complicated emotions] Leia, tired of his shit: What now? Vader: I killed them, once. Leia, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath: And you're not going to do that again. No killing children. Vader: I know that. Leia: Great. I am... regretting asking. I am so very much regretting asking.

I do really like the idea of someone asking Leia once if she wants Jedi training and she says, no, actually, she's fully aware of the fact that she's angry little ball of hate sometimes, especially towards her bio father, and she'd like to refrain from putting herself in a position where she knows enough about the Force to Fall. She wouldn't Fall. But it does make people shut up.

#leia organa #princess leia #Darth Vader #Anakin Skywalker #obi wan kenobi #star wars #time travel #Phoenix Posts

[folklorelise]

Squad Leader Mom gets badly injured.

After Kuchel’s birth, Levi and you had an agreement. There would be no expedition until Kuchel had her first birthday. You did not want to leave your new-born either yet. For an entire year, you would move between your parents’ house and the survey corps headquarters. It was tiring, but you quickly got used to this lifestyle.

Kuchel’s first birthday was spent at the survey corps headquarters with your parents and your brother there as well. (it will probably be in another story) When the day of your comeback arrived, your parents came to take care of Kuchel.

“Be careful out there.” your mother told you.

“I will, don’t worry about me!”

Everyone was getting ready, putting on their gear, preparing their horse. You were so excited about this that you were one of the first ones to be ready to leave. Your squad quickly joined you.

“Squad leader Y/N! It’s really great to see you again.”

“It’s good to be back.”

The night before, Levi told you that since it had been a while since you were outside, you would have to stay close to him and his squad.

“I already talked about it with Erwin.” Levi told you after Kuchel fell asleep.

“Levi I–.”

“I just don’t want–.” Levi paused. “I want to be able to protect you if it’s needed. Which I hope it won’t happen.”

“It won’t.”

When the gate opened, and your horse started to gallop, your heart started to race. It had been a year since you went outside the walls. Thankfully, a week before the expedition, Levi made you get used to riding a horse and using your gear which made you more comfortable. However, your mind kept thinking about Kuchel – you were starting to get worried. Fortunately, the situation outside was not a getting too problematic. There were only a few titans. The night came rather quickly since it was winter, so everyone had to set up their tents.

“Mom, Armin and I are going to bring some wood.” Jean screamed before leaving.

“How are you?” Levi asked you once you were both in your tent.

“Mmh… not so great.” you tried to laugh, “I thought it would be easier.”

“I know. Leaving Kuchel the first time was terrible.” Levi admitted to you. “You just have to think about the moment you’re going to get back and hold her again.”

“I like that thought.” you put your head on his shoulder.

“Are you going to stay at home after that?”

“I like my job; I just have to get used to this.”

The rest of the cadets were sitting in circle outside, waiting for Jean and Armin to get back, but after thirty minutes of waiting, they were still not back. Then very soon, Levi and you joined the cadets.

“What if they’re lost?” you asked.

“Maybe we should go and look for them?” Sasha suggested.

“I’ll go.” Mikasa stood up.

“No, sit down.” you said which she did. “I’ll go.”

“I’ll come with you.” Levi said.

“Should we tell Erwin first?” Sasha asked.

“You go and tell Erwin that Levi and I went looking for them and that there is no need for any of you to come after us. If Jean and Armin come back, you just wait for us.” you told them putting on your ODM gear.

“Be careful!” Connie shouted when Levi and you walked away into the thick forest.

As Levi and you took Jean and Armin’s path, you quickly grabbed his hand.

“We should split up. We will find them more quickly.” you said.

“No. I’m not leaving you alone there.”

“Levi it’s fine. I promise.”

“Y/N…” Levi sighed.

“Pinkie promise then?” Levi started at you, but still shook your pinkie with his.

Levi then went to the opposite side of yours. You were screaming their names, but there was no answer. You quickly went on a high tree so you would see better thanks to the full moon.  After a few minutes of intense research, you finally found two silhouettes standing on a lower tree. You rested a minute without moving so you could catch your breath. But when you saw a titan rising up from the bottom of their tree, you immediately flew toward them.

Armin and Jean were slightly injured, and they did not have their gear on — they climb the tree when some titans started to show up. As the night came, titans started to disappear, but they were lost so they stayed on their tree. The titan beneath Jean and Armin started to shake the tree, trying to make them fell down – it was an abnormal one. It moved quickly.

When you saw the titan raising its arm toward Armin, you did not think twice and instantly flew where he was and pushed him out of the way – the titan grabbed you instead of Armin.

“MOM!” Armin yelled horrified.

The titan threw you away. Your body was thrown away against a tree, yet you were still awake when your body met the ground. The abnormal titan stared at where your body was, and it suddenly started to run toward you. You could only watch it run to you without moving, so you closed your eyes, ready to go. But nothing happened.

After Levi and you went separate ways, he searched the surroundings swiftly and then went back where you went earlier. When he saw from afar a body being thrown away, he used a lot of his gas to get to there as quickly as possible and killed the titan. Levi looked up on the tree and when he only saw Jean and Armin trying to get down, he knew whose body was lying not too far from he was. Levi dropped his swords and run to you.

You were really glad to see Levi. When he kneeled down, you could see that he was trying to hold back his tears.

“Y/N, hey.” Levi sobbed, putting his hands around your face, “It’s ok, I’m here.”

You wanted to tell him that it was ok too, but the only sound that you could make was coughing.

“Don’t try to talk.” Levi warned you.

“Mom? Mom!” Jean was the first on to arrive.

“I’m so sorry mom.” Armin cried when he saw you.

“Jean, help me get Y/N’s gear off and you’ll take it to get back and get help.” Levi ordered.

“Mom,” Jean kneeled down before leaving, “please don’t leave. I’ll be back really quickly ok?”

When he saw you nodding slightly, he flew off where you and Levi came from. Levi put his cloak around your head which was bleeding. He had put your head on his knees so you would be more comfortable. Armin was holding your hand, still crying. You squeezed his hand as hard as you can before you felt like passing out.

“Mom?” Armin called you when he felt your falling out of his. “Mom! Wake up!”

——————————

When Jean arrived at the spot, he run to where the commander was.

“Commander Erwin! You– you have to follow me!” Jean sobbed.

“Kirstein, Sasha already told–.”

“NO!” Jean yelled.

“Jean! Calm down.” Hange stood up. “Why–.”

“Mom. It’s mom, and she’s…” Jean mumbled.

“What happened to mom?” Eren asked with the rest of the cadets around him.

“She’s hurt… there was a titan and– and he just– he grabbed mom…” Jean explained still crying.

Erwin and Hange put on their gear right away, as well as your squad and the cadets. Jean showed them the way, and when they arrived Hange was the first one to be next to you. They quickly took out the emergency kit and cleaned your wound and sutured it.

“She’s still breathing which is good.” Hange declared out loud. “But we have to bring her back now.” Hange turned their head to face Levi. “You did a great job – putting pressure on her head so she would not bleed out – it was great.”

With the help of Erwin, they all gently put your body on the trolley.

“Are we all going to go back?” Mikasa asked.

“None of you will be able to continue in these conditions.” Erwin stated. “Neither can I so yes, we’re all going back with Y/N.”

On the way home, Levi constantly had his hand on your chest to make sure your heart was beating. The minute the trolley went inside the gates, the medical squad took you in charge.

Levi, Hange, Erwin and the kids were all waiting at the mess hall together. The doctor’s first news was that you had a violent concussion, as well as a few broken ribs. Your left leg was in bad shape — they were still operating.

Your parents were immediately informed about the situation and came with Kuchel as soon as possible. When they arrived, Levi took Kuchel in his arms and hugged her tightly. When Kuchel saw the cadets crying, she started to cry too.

“Ma-ma?” Kuchel cried.

——————————

When you opened your eyes, you found yourself in a house you did not recognise.

“Is there anyone here?” you asked. When you opened the door, it brought you on a vast field full of colourful flowers. You could not find anyone, but after walking around for a bit, you finally found someone sitting on the grass.

You quietly walked toward the person and sat down.

“I have been waiting for you.” the woman told you.

“Do I know you?” you asked.

“We’ve never met.”

“You look familiar though.”

“Do you know why you are here?”

“Mh… I think…”

“You had an accident remember?” the woman tried to help you remember.

“Right. The titan. Wait, am I dead?” you panicked. “I can’t be! I’m not dead right?” you turned to face her, but she only stared at you. “I can’t be!” you repeated yelling.

“Why?”

“I can’t– Levi is probably worried sick now! I can’t leave him. I can’t.” you started to cry. “And then there’s Kuchel and the kids. What am I supposed to do now?”

The woman suddenly stood up and took you in her arms, trying to calm you down.

“I don’t have an answer for you, I’m sorry.” she told you. “Let’s go back to the house, ok?”

Once you were in your bed, you closed your eye for what it seemed like a second, but when you opened your eyes again, it was already morning. The longer you stayed here, the more suspicious you got. That woman who helped you was acting weird around you – always dodging your questions. Instead, she would ask a lot of questions about Levi and Kuchel, without any reasons, but you were glad to talk about it.

As time passed, you felt weaker and weaker. You could not run anymore; you could barely wake up in the morning.

“Am I dying again?” you asked her.

“No, quite the opposite actually.”

“What does that mean?”

“Your body is getting healthier, so you’re going to go back soon.”

“Where?”

“To Levi.”

“So, I’m leaving you?” you asked to be sure.

“Yes.” she smiled.

“Does that mean you’re finally going to tell me who you are? And why you have been obsessed with Levi and–.” you then stopped and realised, “You’re– you’re Levi’s mother, right?” you guessed, “I thought you looked familiar on the first day because you look exactly like Levi.”

“I am.” Kuchel smiled at you.

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

“You had to rest.”

“But this is all probably just happening in my head.” you said. “Right?” but she did not answer.

“It might be.” she nodded, “I want you to know one thing before you go. I want to thank you for everything you did for my son. Levi was everything to me,” tears appeared in her eyes, “and now that I know he has someone like you, to love him, I can rest in peace.”

You did not know what to answer so you just went and wrapped her around your arms.

“Thank you for taking care of my Levi.” Kuchel thanked you again, “and for naming your child after me. You are just too pure for this world.” she backed away, “There’s someone else who would like to see you if it’s ok with you.”

“Oh. Mh… sure.” You agreed seeing another woman walking toward you.

“This is Eren’s mother.” Kuchel whispered before leaving you alone with her.

“Y/N, it’s really nice to meet you.” Carla greeted you smiling.

“Hi.” you answered timidly. “It’s–.”

“Thank you. I was really worried Eren would have to grew up lonely, without a motherly presence around him, but seeing you with him makes me feel better. I know you have your own child now, but–.”

“I love Eren.” you reassured her. “I love all of them as if they were my own. You don’t have to be worried anymore.”

Then, you suddenly felt your strength leaving you body and collapse on the floor.

——————————

Levi never left you. He would occasionally leave to shower, eat, feed Kuchel and put her to sleep, but as soon as it was over, he would rush back to you.

“Levi you should sleep a little bit.” Erwin said during one of his visits.

“Every time I close my eyes, I see her lying on the ground, with her blood everywhere. Except in my dreams, she is not alive. I can’t sleep like that. I– I can’t sleep without her.” Levi explained.

“I’m sure she’s going to wake up soon.” Erwin tried to comfort Levi.

The cadets were lifeless too. None of them wanted to get up in the morning, a lot of them could not sleep at night either.

“I can’t lose another mom.” Eren told Mikasa one night.

“You won’t. We won’t.”

Armin stayed at the library very often. It was the place where you first talked to each other – where you two bonded together. Jean would just overwork himself, trying not to think about you. Which was not successful – he would secretly visit you every time Levi went to put Kuchel to bed.

“Please wake up soon, because I miss you a lot.” Jean would tell you every night.

Connie would help Sasha taking care of Kuchel when Levi could not. Hange and Erwin stayed with Levi most of the time. Your parents and your brother visited when they could, helping as much as they could, but everyone just wanted you to wake up.

Mikasa tried to be strong for her friends – she would be comforting them if they cried or if they needed to talk. But she did not talk to anyone. Two weeks after the accident, during dinner, Mikasa broke down crying without any reason.

“Mikasa! Are you ok?” Sasha quickly took her outside, with the rest of her friends following them.

No one knew what to do. So, they just all sat around her, waiting for Mikasa to calm down on her own.

“Don’t follow me.” Mikasa said when she stood up.

She rapidly walked to your room and sat next to you.

“I miss you, mom.” Mikasa sobbed quietly. “I really miss you a lot.”

Mikasa stopped her crying when she saw Levi with Kuchel entering the room.

“It’s ok.” Levi said. “You can cry.”

“I’m fine.” Mikasa responded.

“Do you want me to leave you alone for another minute?”

“Yes. Thank you.”

Most nights, Levi would just rest his head on your bed, and hold your hand and then talk to you.

“Kuchel comes sometimes to see you because she misses you. I do too. A lot.”

“This week I slept for five hours in total, which is better than last week.”

“Please wake up. I miss your voice, and I feel like I’m going to get crazy talking alone.”

“Please, don’t leave me alone.”

——————————

You spent three weeks without waking up. When you first opened your eyes, it was night. And it was one of those rare nights where Levi would be asleep. You could see how tired Levi was with the dark bags under his eyes. You really wanted to let him sleep but you were also really thirsty.

“Levi.” you grunted which just made him turn his head around. Then you tried to shake him a little, but you did not have any strength in you. Then you suddenly started to cough loudly which immediately woke up Levi.

“Y/N?” Levi asked astonished. “Am I dreaming again?”

“No. Please,” you continued to talk with a low voice, “I want water.”

“Ok. I’ll be right back, just don’t go back to sleep ok.”

“Ok.”

Levi came out of his room and took a deep breath before going to take a glass of water. After drinking water and eating the food you parents recently brought, you felt so much better.

“Do you want some?” you asked Levi.

“I’m ok.”

“You should sleep more, you look tired.” You told him once you were done eating.

“Are you sure you’re fine? I can go and wake up the doctor.” Levi asked you again ignoring your statement.

“Levi, I’m fine. You on the other side–.” but you stopped when you saw Levi started to cry again.

Levi quickly lay down next to you, hiding his face in your chest.

“Let’s sleep and talk in the morning ok?” you said.

In the morning, Levi was the first one to wake up. He thought that he dreamt about last night, but you quickly woke up after he did. Levi helped you take a real shower, and changed you before letting you lay down on your own bed. It was more comfortable than the one in the medical spot.

When Levi went to lay next to you, his bedroom door flew open with Jean out of breath.

“Mom she disappe–.” but stopped instantly after seeing you. “Mom?”

“Jean!” you opened your arms so he could hug you.

“You’re here! You’re– you’re really here, awake, alive!” Jean shouted happily. “I have to go and tell the others!”

“Where’s Kuchel?” you suddenly asked Levi.

“She’s still sleeping, she never wakes up early.”

Your conversation was cut short when all the cadets barged in. There was a lot of crying. Very soon after, Hange and Erwin also came in.

“I’m so glad to see you again.” Hange hugged you.

“It’s good to you too. Erwin come give me a hug too!”

After a morning of catching up with everyone, you and Levi went to see Kuchel. She was already up when you entered the room.

“Hello.” you picked Kuchel up.

“Ma-ma!” Kuchel laughed.

“Oh, I missed you so much.” you hold her tightly.

After seeing Kuchel, you had to leave and meet your doctor to check on you. But Levi decided to bring Kuchel with you because as she saw you leaving, she started to cry.

“She definitely won’t be leaving you any time soon.”

The doctor advised you to continue to rest for another month before going back to any kind of activities. For dinner, the kids insisted on eating with you which you agreed to obviously.

“You should eat more.” Mikasa told you, giving you half of her meal.

“Here, you should take my bread too.” Connie said.

After a lively dinner, the kids spent the evening playing with Kuchel while Levi and you just sat there and watched them.

“Aren’t you tired?” Levi asked you.

“No. Stop worrying about me. I would tell you if I was tired.” you said taking his hand.

“Mom, can we sleep over tonight please?” Eren asked.

“No.” Levi answered.

“Of course you can, just bring your sleeping bags and join us in our bedroom.” You quickly added.

“Why?” Levi complained.

“I can’t say no to them.”

“I can.”

“Just this once, I’m sure it’ll be great.”

At night, everyone fell asleep rather quickly except for you. You tried to close your eyes and sleep, but you could not.

“Why aren’t you sleeping?” Levi whispered.

“Sorry, I can sleep elsewhere if–.”

“No, if you’re not there I won’t sleep. Just tell me what’s wrong.”

“I don’t know…”

“Do you want to go and take a walk outside?”

“You should sleep instead of doing this.”

“I won’t be able to sleep now that I know you can’t.”

Levi put on his long coat and you did the same before leaving quietly the room. You both sat down outside on the grass.

“I–.” you started, “I almost died.” you said out loud laughing dryly.

“Y/N, if you want to cry, it’s ok. I’ll be here.”

“N– no.” but then immediately started to cry uncontrollably.

Levi immediately took you in his arms and let you cry for as long as you needed. You calmed down after fifteen minutes of crying but stayed in Levi’s arms.

“Are you feeling better now?” Levi asked you.

“I don’t know…”

“It’s ok too. Do you want to go back and try to sleep?”

“Yes.”

Levi took your hand and you both walked back to your bedroom. Once you were both comfortably set in bed you put your head on his chest.

“I love you Levi Ackerman.” you said looking at him blush slightly.

“I… love you… too.” Levi responded trying to avoid your gaze.

“Ew my parents are being disgustingly in love.” Jean commented looking away.

“Why aren’t you asleep?” Levi asked him.

“I was thirsty but I’m not anymore.”

“Goodnight Jean.” you told him before closing your eyes.

“Goodnight mom.”

After that incident, the kids started to be more and more protective of you outside the walls, by always being behind you. Levi would never be too far away as well. Eren was always ready to transform into a titan to protect you. But nothing too bad happened after this.

—————————

—————————

I have a tiny part 2 where Levi gets nightmares about that incident, but never talks about it sigh Y/N. Reader eventually found out and Levi finally talks about it. It would probably be short though.

Have a nice day!! And remember, you are incredible!

MASTERLIST

#attack on titan x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman angst #levi x reader #levi ackerman fluff #levi ackerman #squad leader mom au #eren yaegar #jean kirstein #armin arlet #mikasa ackerman #erwin smith x reader #hange zoe #hope you liked it #and yes there will be more of squad leader mom :)

[pennylanefics]

First Meeting - Jacob Black

a/n: sorry i haven’t been posting many fics. still so caught up with school and i know these next two weeks are going to be STRESSFUL. also i’m not super proud of this :/

•••

“So, you’re a werewolf?” You confirm, glancing towards Jacob. He nods, shoving his hands in his pockets, continuing to walk beside you.

“It’s something I was born with and I couldn’t help imprinting on you,” he explains a little more.

He had taken you on a walk on the Beach at La Push to tell you that he had imprinted on you the other day, and to inform you of the history of his tribe and what it meant.

“Well, it’s certainly lots of new information, but I’m glad you told me,” you smile. He returns the gesture and wraps an arm around your waist.

“I really wasn’t supposed to, but there was no way I couldn’t. I love you and I hate not telling you things, so the pack will just have to deal with it.”

“The pack?” You wonder.

“Yeah. All of us that have the shapeshifting gene. We’re kind of like a big family. Sam’s the alpha, and the rest of us have to follow his orders. Paul, Jared, Seth, Leah, Quil, and Embry.”

“Quil and Embry are like you too?”

“Uh huh. And I want to introduce you to them. All of them.” You stop in your tracks, causing Jacob to walk a few steps ahead before stopping as well.

“What?” He asks.

“You want me to meet the pack? The people that are like your family?”

“Yeah. I think it’d be great for you to get to know them and be close with them, considering you’re going to be around for a while,” he chuckles. You, however, were still very nervous.

It shocked you a bit. Sure, you’ve known each other for a while, and you’ve been dating for a short while, but the whole imprinting and werewolf thing was new to you. You weren’t sure about this all. It all happened so fast.

“Uh, maybe it’d be better if we wait a little bit. I mean, I just learned about all of this, can I have some time to process it?” Jacob sighs and nods his head understandingly.

“You’re right, I’m sorry,” he whispers, pulling you in for a hug.

He waited about a week until he asked you again. The following day, the pack was going to be at Sam and Emily’s all day, so he thought it would be a good time to meet them, relaxed and lounging around, better than a fancy, uptight dinner.

As much as you were dreading it, you agreed, knowing it would make Jake happy. You dressed in a casual, comfy outfit, and hopped into Jacob’s car to ride over there. The entire drive, though, your hands were fidgeting in your lap. Jacob eventually reaches over and holds your hand in his to help calm you.

Walking inside, you felt the atmosphere change. Everyone was staring at you, pausing whatever they were doing. You suddenly felt very self-concious and shy, which makes you curl into Jacob’s side.

“Hey guys, this is (Y/N),” he introduces. Everyone gathers around in front of you, introducing themselves one by one. You offer a shy wave to every one, and the tension in the air is awkward.

“Why don’t you settle in, (Y/N), would you like a muffin?” Emily warmly offers you.

“Sure, thanks,” you smile softly, plucking one from the plate. Jacob guides you into the living room and takes a seat on the couch with you. The pack suspiciously watches from the kitchen, not knowing what to think of you yet.

“I don’t think that went well, Jake,” you whisper, keeping your head down. His hand comes up to rub your back.

“We still have the rest of the day, everything will be fine.”

It was, for the most part. You were still quite shy and not exactly interactive, your mind racing, overthinking every little thing you said and did.

When lunch was ready, you all sat around two small tables, you and Jake at a table with Embry, Quil, and Jared. They asked you about yourself, which you answered shortly and softly.

You could tell you weren’t making a good impression, and that thought only made your anxiety worse.You were trying hard to socialize, but your brain was so clouded. At one point, you get very overwhelmed and take a step outside, Jacob watching after you, worried.

He can hear the other’s thoughts when you do.

What is she doing now? Jared

What’s so hard about answering simple questions about herself? Paul

She seems...boring. Embry

Jacob growls at every one of them and stands up, storming outside to find you. Yet you are no where to be found. He searches the entire perimeters of the house, but he finally notices you in his car. Climbing into the driver’s seat, he’s hesitant.

“What’s on your mind, baby?” He softly questions. Your heart skips a beat from his gentle tone.

“I can’t...I can’t stop thinking about what they think of me, and it’s making this all worse and I want them to like me, but with how today’s going, I don’t think they do,” you ramble. Jacob shifts in his seat, scared to tell you what he just heard from them.

“(Y/N), it doesn’t matter what they think about you. If they don’t like you, that’s on them. You’re an amazing woman, and I love you so much. You’re my imprint and you’re not going anywhere. No matter what they think.”

“But you said they’re like your brothers! What am I supposed to think or do if your own brothers don’t like me?”

“Deal with it. Let them come around to see it just takes time for you to get used to new people, and especially get used to this life. I know they’re going to love you as soon as you start spending more time with them.”

“But-”

“No buts! I’ll go back in there and tell them that you’re not feeling well and we can go home, see them another day, but in a smaller group. Maybe getting to know them one by one would be better.”

“How are you going to lie to them when they can read your thoughts?” Jacob chuckles and shakes his head.

“Oh yeah, I forgot I told you that,” he says.

“So, what are you going to tell them?”

“That you got a bit overwhelmed with everything and are still trying to deal with it all, and that you need a bit more space. I’ll tell them it was my fault.”

“Because it is your fault,” you laugh. Jacob scoffs playfully and opens the door.

“Okay, okay, sassy pants. Just relax and I’ll be back. I’ll pack up our lunch and take it home.”

Jacob returns minutes later, Sam walking out with him to chat with you for a moment.

“Hey, we know this isn’t going to be easy for you, and trust me, it took Emily a while, even after what happened. But I know you’re going to fit right in,” Sam tells you. You smile gratefully and open your door to hug him.

“Thank you. I promise to be back soon, maybe when there’s less people.”

“Why don’t you and Jake come over for dinner one night? Just you, him, Emily and me?” He offers.

“That’d be great.” Sam looks to Jacob and nods.

“We’ll find a day maybe next week or the following,” Sam says.

“Yeah, we’ll talk and work out a day,” Jacob replies. Sam heads back inside and Jacob starts the car up, driving home in silence.

He puts your leftovers in the fridge for later as you settle into your couch, eyes falling shut.

“Come here,” Jacob whispers, pulling you into his arms after he takes a seat. You are pulled flush against his chest, inhaling the scent of your favorite cologne of his. “I love you.” His voice is just as soft as before.

“I love you too, Jake. I’m so-”

“If you apologize in any way, I’m not going to accept it,” he chuckles. You sigh and smack his arm.

“I really am, though. I know how important it is to you for me to meet them and get to know them. And the fact that I got caught up in my own thoughts to do so-”

“It makes you human. No one would be able to act normal around a group of people that they just found out are shapeshifting werewolves. I don’t hate you, I’m not upset with you, and trust me, I would much rather have a lazy day in with you than listen to them yell and scream and fight with each other.”

You don’t respond, and instead stay cuddled up against him, his warm body comforting you, along with his hand stroking your back.

“I’m so grateful for you,” he mumbles against your forehead.

#jacob black #jacob black imagines #jacob black x reader #jacob black imagine #twilight #twilight new moon #twilight eclipse #the twilight saga #imagines #fanfiction #fanfic

[obeythedemons]

Request trans ftm MC

Lucifer

Makes sure he gets the proper pronouns down and MC's name

Ensures that MC takes pride in who he is

Buys MC pride flags, anything that says pride on it with the trans flag - it is his "sin" after all

Let's MC tell him whatever MC's most comfortable with

Will make sure MC receives proper medical care if he needs it to transition if he decides to transition

Will kill anyone that gives MC a hard time, if he's against killing, then another form of punishment will make do

"I want you to see the way I see you, you should be proud of yourself. That includes this."

Mammon

Will make sure to not steal any binders, meds, or anything that makes MC comfortable

Gets MC "manstrating" products, as he calls them, without complaining if MC needs them - gets some that look badass. Like a pad with flames or tampons that look like bullets? He doesn't know, he's trying. Uses Lucifer's card and buys himself something while at the store

He is great at affirming MC's gender, but may go a little overboard, see above.

Will fight anyone if he even thinks they did something wrong, like misgender MC

Brings back clothes he wore on photoshoots and gives them to him

"I-it's 'cause I'm great man, your first man, that you should look like me. Not like I want ya to match any of my outfits."

Leviathan

Like everyone else, I think Levi's trans in some way - genderfluid, nonbinary, ftm, something

Gets it, totally does

Is a bit relieved when MC comes out, because that's something he can use to bond with him.

Gives bits of advise on what to expect if he decides to transition

Shows him anime of different trans characters

Also shows MC different games that are gender neutral or allows him to pick which gender the character should be - bonus points if the character can be trans

Can sew MC new clothes if he wants, will be super flustered with it, but also really happy

"I-I want you to know I'll be here for you, whenver you need me to. You're my Henry."

Satan

Possibly not the most familiar with trans issues, but will immediately do more research on it

Has to take a break from it

Becomes enraged by how humans treat other humans and thinking of how they might treat MC

Satan will be quick to lash out at anyone looking at MC the wrong way and possibly black out doing so

"If anyone treats you terribly, I'll deal with them."

Asmodeus

Creates an entire fashion line to make trans individuals feel more comfortable

Asks for your opinion and gets in touch with others on what would work well to get a more diverse point of view

I think he's gender fluid or doesn't care about gender, but knows how it can be important to others

Both him and Levi are the best ones to go to when MC needs to rant about something

Will most definitely help MC with his skin if he goes on hormones, second puberty can be a bitch

"Oh, I'm so happy you trusted me with this my sweet MC! We'll make sure you look so cute with a new wardrobe!"

Beelzebub

Doesn't really appear like he understands, but he does

He's listened to Levi and Asmo talk about gender before

He doesn't personally understand it, but it's not for him to understand and he accepts that

Will protect MC from anyone that he thinks might cause trouble - prefers to stop it before it happens

Gets MC food that is supposed to boost testosterone

Will also know which exercises boost which muscles if MC wants to gain some muscle mass

Gives MC a hug if he's okay with it when they come out

"I'm just happy you're you."

Belphegor

Has the best baggy hoodies that he's fine with sharing

He'll take them back because it smells like him and helps him sleep

He hopes that his scent also helps MC to relax and feel better with how he appears

Makes sure he has nice dreams and appears how he wants to appear in them

Is completely judgment-free - he's more judgemental on him being human than anything

Diavolo

Transgender? Oh! Humans have gender! He nearly forgot

Is very excited to learn more about gender, what it means, and what being transgender entails

May ask too many questions or too personal of questions - it's coming from the right place, but Dia. Please. Stop. Luckily, Barbatos will make him stop

Ensures all of the proper measures are taken to change name, pronouns, and bathroom use (if they have gendered bathrooms in Devildom???)

Barbatos

Already knew from looking into the future

Didn't say anything until he was comfortable with telling him

Very gentle in ensuring he understands when to use which pronouns - is he comfortable using he/him around everyone or just a select few

Will be standing silently near him and glares daggers with a sinister smile if anyone tries to mess with him

He'll give him little things so that MC knows that he's thinking of him and cheering him on

Simeon

Oh yes, Henry is trans, too

It's canon, not just after the fact Simeon wrote the series

He wants to make sure he did a good job at capturing a trans character and will at times ask for advice on how he should write them

Understand that it is a diverse community, though

Has the best words of encouragement and always knows what to say

Luke

Is his guard dog and puts himself in front of MC when needed

The best little brother MC could have

Doesn't really see why being trans should change how he views MC

But is really glad he has a big brother to look up to

Solomon

Is fascinated with how gender has changed throughout time

In fact, his gender changes depending on how society shifts

Will accompany MC and Asmo when they go shopping for clothes

Offers to use magic to help MC transition if he wants or brew a potion

The potion will taste awful

Is very accepting and will help protect MC when they're in the human realm together

#Obey Me! #ftm #Trans #Trans pride #Transgender #Lucifer #Mammon #Leviathan #Satan #Asmodeus #Beelzebub #Belphegor #Diavolo #Barbatos #Luke #Simeon #Solomon #Headcanon #female to male

[youn9racha]

I Know (Part II)

Pairing: Changbinxfem!reader

Genre: smut

Warning: mild stalking, stripping, phone sex???, mutual masturbation, semi-exhibitionism, a tiny bit of corruption kink, and an even tinier praise kink, switch!changbin, switch!reader

Words: 2.8k

Extra Notes: like I’ve mentioned in the last part, everyone is above the age of 21 (think senior year of college age), so thats that. I’ve also noticed that the lyric is not that related to the story, but oh well :’) anyways, hope you enjoy this

And baby, I know, I know whatever city you’re in, you’re still the boy that I’d pick…

PLEASE READ PART 1 FIRST BEFORE THIS !!

—————————————————————————————————

This is no way representative of the way Stray Kids act. They’re nothing but references of character, and in no shape or form is this how they act. And I am in no way romanticizing or glamorizing any toxic behavior exhibited, they’re just stories that is meant to be read. Readers discretion is advised.

—————————————————————————————————

Changbin’s calling me…

What in the world does he want to talk to me about in this ungodly hour? It wasn’t late, but it certainly wasn’t early enough for a call like this. I looked back at the window and I still see the curtains still closed, assuming he was out or maybe in another room. I answered and put the phone in my ear.

”Hello?”

“Hey, (y/n)! I just wanted to call to check up on you,” he said, “how are you?”

Damn, he only called for innocent intentions... Why is he so damn cute?! (y/n), you got two choices to respond back; you either respond give him a nice sweet response, or you give a sly yet friendly comeback. It can work—

“(y/n)?” The voice out of the phone took me out of my inner self’s debate.

“Yes! Yes! I am fine,” I said, embarrassed and mentally facepalming myself. This is not doing well, he already thinks I am a creep and a loser. Or maybe not, since its seems like I heard a faint chuckle and the word “cute,” followed by, but that could just be a figment of my imagination. “How are you?”

”Oh, I am good, just came back from hanging out with Chan and Han,“ changbin responded, there were shuffling in the background so he could be doing something while on the phone, but what is it? I wouldn’t know. I heard him and Chris mentioning a ‘Han’ in our conversation we had while preparing for my apartment, so that name is familiar, however the owner’s not. “You should meet him one day, I think you both will be good friends.”

”Woah there, you better take me to dinner first before I meet your friend,” I teased. Keep it going, (y/n), you’re on the right track, you’ve definitely caught him off guard, like you always do.

“Give me a place, time, and date, you’ll get that dinner, or maybe I’ll let Chris take you.” Changbin nonchalantly said, oozing confidence just by his voice. That bitch… Always makes it harder for me than it already is. As if he saw my blushing reaction, he began laughing.

“What’s wrong, princess? Cat’s got your tongue?” He said it in a low voice. Usually, I would gag if anyone—let alone a man—calls me princess, but with him, it felt different. It felt… arousing? No! No! (y/n), get a grip!

I rolled my eyes and laid on my back to be more comfortable, “What is it, Changbin?” I said, changing the subject, “What is that you wanted to call me at 10 p.m?” Yes, pretend like he didn’t just call you princess in the sexiest tone of voice you’ve ever heard. Totally would work.

”I told you, I just want to check up on you,“ he confessed but he also paused to say something further, “and also I am bored and I kinda felt like talking to you. I’m not wasting your time, aren’t I?” Although I couldn’t see him, he does however sound really sincere with his words. I don’t want to sound naive, but he sounded truthful.

“No,” I shook my head, “you really didn’t, besides I just got out the shower and was just scrolling through instagram.” I said, looking down in my nails.

”Oh, really?” He said, “were you going to sleep?”

”No, I stay on social media for a long period of time, I don’t sleep that easily“

”I see,” he said, but then he stopped talking. As the awkward silence has erupted between us, I started to think more about the first time I saw him and how I felt. While I thought it would be better for me to tell him later on and on person, but this balloon inside of me was getting bigger and bigger as guilt is inflating it. I sighed and started to speak, “Hey Changbin.”

”Yeah?”

“Can I confess you to something?”

”Tell me anything, doll, I’m all ears.”

Dammit! You’re not making it easier.

I bit my lips, “uhh,” I am glad he wasn’t looking at me, grimacing and slapping my head.

”You know hitting yourself isn’t gonna help,” as soon as Changbin uttered these words, my heart sank. My eyes widened as I got up and looked out window. His curtains were open, and it showcase a very, very pleasant show.

I see Changbin, sitting at the edge of his bed, facing me as his black shirt was fitting his form really well, especially with the semi-flexed arm that has his phone near his ears meanwhile the other arm was holding the elbow of the occupied arm. He was look at me straight at my eyes when we made eye contact, and fuck, was that an image to look at. As I looked like a deer going through a headlight, Changbin tilted his head in confusion, but he still had a smirk, “what is it you wanted to me?” he said through the phone.

”I-I“ I stuttered. At this point, I’ve lost all sense of dignity and my self thought, I am about to get called a creep by a good looking man I met not too long. Here goes nothing.

”I may have invaded your privacy,” I said, which caused Changbin to furrow his eyebrows in even more confusion, still having a slight smile to it. “What are you talking about?”

”Ugh, Changbin, I saw you half naked when apartment touring numerous times!” I yelled in frustration, as he kept pushing my button. I looked away, not bearing to look at him, as I closed my eyes out of guilt. “I understand if you don’t want to be friend, even though we met for only a week, but I just couldn’t bear the guilt that I—“

As I confessed, I heard a laugh coming put of the phone, I opened my eyes and looked at Changbin looking down, with shoulders shaking up and down. Now, I have the confused look that he had, “What’s funny?”

“Oh, princess, you have no idea,” He said, still looking down. Me still being bemused, he noticed my silence and looked up at my frowned face.

”I know…” He smirked, while my eyes were widened. Son of a bitch.

”W-wh-“

“I thought you knew that I’m doing all this on purpose, I’ve been trying to catch your attention every single way.” He leaned forward, placing both elbows in his knees, “I thought you were smart, only to be a gullible baby.” He whispered the last part, as I gulped at the last part. God damn, he’s so intense with his gaze. His eyes wandering all over me meanwhile maintaining a very dark yet exciting aura, which typically puts me off but now, I’ve never wanted to pounce a man so badly.

I smirked at him, the guilt I had had fizzled away, only to replace with arousal.

“So you’re not mad?” I looked at him, with innocent eyes, now laying on my side, facing him, as my robe slipped and exposed a part of my shoulder and the upper of my chest. He breathed in, as he was examining me, “no, why would I be mad at you?” He leaned back, as his head was thrown back, neck exposed, placing his free hand on the back of his neck.

God, is he so fine…

”I could never be mad at my precious baby.” He smiled a seductive smile at me, which made me riled up by rolling my eyes and looking up. “You like getting called that, don’t you?” He may have said it in a question form, but it didn’t feel like one, it was rather a statement than a question. “Hm,” I said, looking back at him, eyes half opened out of hunger for him.

We had an intense eye contact, where if it weren’t for the distant and the glass that is placed in front of us, we’d probably be all over each other.

”Has your hang out with Han and Chris worn you out?” I asked, decievingly innocent. Man, the power this man has over me is no joke. He scoffed, “so you’re just going to mention other men like that?”

Ignoring him, I got up, letting the towel that was loosely in my head fall onto my bed, and went closer to the window, “let me relieve you of your stress, if you don’t mind.” I shyly fidgeted on my robe belt. He looked at me up and down, licking his lips, “I wouldn’t mind, if you don’t as well.”

There’s nothing more sexier than mutual consent. (y/n), shut up, don’t ruin the moment.

I smiled and backed away from the window. I put my phone on speaker and put it on the side. I looked back at him, as I held onto my robe belt, he looked at me with a smile. I turned around with a slight sway on my hips, as I slowly undid my belt, slowly exposing my back at him, smiling as I heard a shuddering breath coming out of the phone.

As the robe completely fell off my body, being just in my underwear, exposing whatever secret flaws that has been hidden from the public. I silently gasp at the cool breeze as I held onto my chest, sensing my nipples getting hard. “Turn around for me, baby,” Changbin’s breathy voice echoed all over the room.

We may not be in the same room, and we maybe exposing ourselves to whoever is above and under us as well, but neither of us care. In our eyes, we only got each other, and we’re the only ones in existence.

I turned to him, letting go of my breasts and letting myself be bare, only to see him palming himself through his tight pants, groaning at his lack of full on skin-to-skin touch. It’s like he was waiting for me to tell him touch himself, which proved correct when he said, “please, let me touch myself.”

I smiled sympathetically, and also slightly astonishingly. I have never met a man with such switch like that. His dominating demeanor has faded and been replaced to a submissive cutie, which I obviously seem to admire very much. Pretending to thinking, I sat down, and looked at him, putting my hands behind me, “only if you give me a show too.”

I smirked at his state. He was disheveled, and adorned a beet tint all across his cheeks and nose. He looked beaten, but I loved it, and he does too. He put his phone on speaker too, quickly got up, and rapidly got his shirt.

“Ah ah!” I said, which caused him to freeze, looking at me, desparation was seeping through his eyes. Menacingly smiling, “slowly.”

Which he obeyed, surprisingly patient and sensual, I jokingly remarked that “he got dancer hips,” with the way he took off clothes while his hips moved in a way not many who can control their bodies can. He chuckle, “you should see how it works wonder,” his cocky attitude has made a comeback, which should piss me off but it made the whole thing hotter than it already is.

We’re both in our underwear, looking up at our eyes and looking down at each other’s half-nude bodies. Changbin wasn’t the tallest man I have ever met—not that it matters—, but he got many aspects that makes up for it, and its not just looks or personality. Just by the outline, I can tell that his little guy wasn’t little.

I propped myself with my elbows as I spread my legs, for him to see the wet spot that is stained in my underwear. He grunted at the sight, while I chuckle, “you like what you see?” I faux-innocently asked as I trailed my hand from my neck, making my head fall back, down to the valley of my chest, onto the waistband of my underwear.

“Fuck…” Changbin cursed, admiring the sight in front of him. He didn’t realize how lucky he was to see me in a state like this, not many have the privilege, especially not with men I met in a short amount of time.

I tugged my panties, took it off and exposed a part that he was dying to see, which caused him to gulp. He sighed with a smile, “god damn, (y/n),“ he shook his head in disbelie, “I’ve always thought you were gorgeous, but now I’m convinced you’re a goddess“

I giggle at his words, “and you, sir, are a demon disguised as a greek god” I teased back, tracing my two fingers around my lips, I noticed that he still was in his underwea. He still waited for my permission. How adorable.

”You can take off your underwear, Binnie” I didn’t even mean to give him the nickname, but I was too excited to even think straight. I looked at him, and saw him reveal his friend, and I gasped loudly, which made Changbin alert. “What? Whats wrong?”

”Nothing, its just,” I chuckle, “you have a nice dick.”

”Thank you,” He smirked as he sat down and looked at me, with full attention. I put my two fingers into my mouth, while maintaining eye contact. I then trailed my finger down to clit, which resulted in me letting out a blissful gasp. Meanwhile, Changbin was repositioning to a comfortable position as he began to touch himself, which caused him to let out a choked out groan.

”Binnie, as you touching yourself?” I half-whispered, but it was still loud enough for him hear along with my fingers movements that moved from my clit onto my slit, which made me moan.

”Ah-y-yes” Changbin groaned and nodded, as he was stroking his dick following the pace that I was going at.

After hearing Changbin’s groans, I began inserting my fingers at my slit, making me whimper in the process, “oh, fuck” I cursed, as I started to thrust my fingers in and out, noises coming out of my mouth along with the wetness of my pussy were getting louder, which excited Changbin, as his stroking was audible through the phone along with his beautiful groans.

“god, (y/n), if only I could touch you,” Changbin spoke through groans when he saw me fondling my breast and going faster. I was getting louder with my noises, in contrast of Changbin’s quite yet beautiful and audible noises. So much so, it sounds like Changbin was watching porn, rather than getting fucked at a distance.

“Ah-are-fuck-are you close?” Changbin asked through whines, his speech was getting difficult as he was getting closer to climax with his strokes going as fast as I was.

I nodded, out of struggle of speech, whining out, “Ah! Binnie!”

“Fuck, (y/n), I’m—“ Changbin grunted, as his strokes was started to get sloppy, he began to thrust onto his hands. I began to feel like something burning up in my stomach, moaning at the sensation, “Chang—I’m cummin— I’m cumming”

“Me too…” He choked on his words, as his groans and moans were also getting louder. Our phone voices combined was dirty but erotic, topped with the scene of two people masturbating to each other, now thats even a hotter view.

“Binnie!”

“Go ahead, baby... cum”

And just like that, I let out a squeal as I reached my peak, still playing with myself until I sensed an overstimulation. Not too long after, I was hearing a lot of grunt from the call and then I looked at Changbin, who ended up cumming onto his stomach, his chest raising up and down, letting himself catch his breath. Still out of breath, we both looked at each other, we both laughed at our fucked out state.

“Holy fuck, was that hot?” Changbin commented, taking the phone, putting it out of his speaker and back to his ear. I laughed at his sudden remark, nodding, “oh yeah, can’t wait to feel what you feel like,” I bit my lip.

”At least buy me dinner first,” He teased, referring to the remark I had at the time, which made me roll my eyes and him to chuckle. “You’re a dick,” I said.

”A big one, and a pretty one according to you,” He teased again. I started to jokingly groan at his words, causing him to laugh, “alright, alright, I’ll stop.”

I got up and picked the phone, looking at him, “I had fun, we should do this again,” him and I started exchanging a smile, this time it was more pure than the smiles we had earlier. He nodded, “for sure, but the next time is going to be in one of our beds, I really need to touch you.”

”The feeling is mutual.”

We began to talk a little more, until we both have felt that slumber was starting to sneak up onto our eyes. We both ultimately had to hang up, since we don’t want to raise our phone bills with our already long call. While facing away from the window, I couldn’t help but started admire Changbin in my head.

I typically hate men, but Changbin wasn’t just like any man.

He was Changbin, and I highly doubt that you’ll ever find a man like him.

#changbin fanfic #changbin scenarios #changbin smut #changbin imagines #stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios #stray kids smut #stray kids fanfic #skz imagines #skz scenarios #skz fanfic #skz smut

[wonlouvre]

Yayyy i absolutely love your writing!!

I would like to request a Hoshi × gn!idol! Reader angst+fluff imagine where Soonyoung cheers/takes care of his reserved s/o who has been having a hard time and has opened up to him about it for the first time. S/o is someone who can't say no easily and because of that their workload had increased a lot. But in the end they can't hold themselves any longer and breaks down.

strength | k. sy.

pairing: hoshi x gn!idol reader genre: fluff, angst, then fluff again warnings: mentions of anxiety, physical and mental tiredness (please tell me if i missed anything!) word count: 1.8k+ (i honestly don’t even know anymore)

💌: thank you very much for requesting! i made some tweaks here and there and i hope you still like it! thank you for loving my writing as well :’( it really means a lot that <3 i hope you like this!

Soonyoung was aware that you’d be coming from Japan for your collaborative magazine photoshoot. He just didn’t know that you’d be going straight from the airport at four o’clock in the morning. 

He thought he read your message wrong saying that you’re on your way to the assigned shooting location. As far as he’s concerned, the call time was at seven a.m. He had to do a double take while squinting his eyes over the brightness of his phone but when he saw another bubble pop out saying you’re already there, he immediately jumped off his bed to shower. 

He misses you. You’ve been going in and out of the country because of promotions and the chances of getting to see you has been slim to none. If he ever meets with you, it will be short because either one of you has to go back to work or has to go back to bed because there is a flight to catch the next day. It’s obviously tough. But your relationship perseveres. 

Soonyoung will do everything to make it work and you are together with him on that. So if it means he has to shower half-asleep and wear his boxers backwards just to see you, he’d never mind.

Your Japanese album tour started and ended successfully but work didn’t stop from there. You were just getting started. Before leaving the said country, you were fully booked for live television performances, interviews, variety shows and the like. It was exhausting but, it was an opportunity that you couldn’t miss out on for the world even if you wanted to. 

Soonyoung is proud of you and he will always be. Heart eyes were formed whenever he got the chance to watch your performances whether it be from a paid livestream event or from kind fans sharing and uploading their videos or photos on Twitter or Instagram. He’s even more in love when it’s in person and he gets to watch your performance plus enjoy it with your never failing supportive fans. 

However, Soonyoung is also worried because he knows you’re also tired. He knows how fulfilling it is to do what you love the most, but he’s no stranger to the physically and mentally tiring part of it. He wasn’t even surprised to catch you asleep on the couch when he arrived at your dressing room. 

Your manager’s eyes brightened when they saw him, quickly standing up from the chair to give him a hug. 

“They told me they just need a fifteen minute nap,” they whisper against Soonyoung’s shoulder as he hugs them back. “But we both know they need more than that.”

Soonyoung sadly smiles while his eyes never leave your curled form. He mutters a simple “I’ll take it from here” while your manager excuses themself to buy everyone breakfast. 

It’s a challenge to take you into his arms without disturbing your sleep because he doesn’t want that from happening. He just wants to hold you for the remaining time without interruption from other people. He just wants to hold you and share this moment of calm before the lights and camera get into action later. 

Soonyoung’s thankful you didn't, although he still felt your lips lightly ghost against his jaw, telling him that you know that he’s here. He brings your legs over his lap while he cradles your head close to his neck. He wishes to lay down, but the couch is too cramped for two bodies so he’d have to settle with this position. He guesses it’s fine with how you deeply inhale his scent and snuggle closer and closer, locking your arms around his waist with no intentions of letting go. 

Just like you, he falls asleep, completely comfortable and content in finally having you in his arms again. 

Your tangled bodies were shaken to wake up at least an hour later. Both of your managers have food in their hand, ready to energize the two of you up before moving forward with the hair and makeup. The agenda for today includes a photoshoot with several changes of outfit, a short shoot for an audio video presentation and lastly an interview or question and answer of some sort. 

Your relationship has been publicly known for two years already. Some fans have been supportive while some have been angry. It’s nothing new and it’s nothing the two of you could care about at this point. 

Countless projects have been offered to the two of you during the course of those two years whether it be a song or dance performance, a guesting on a famous variety show and even a three second cameo appearance on a drama. They’re all lovely offers and you would love to participate, but the two of you made a decision to keep the relationship private. Sure, you’ll accept it from time to time. But, it’s still very limited to one to two songs to sing or dance to together and some magazine photoshoots. Just like now. 

By far, this is the third time the two of you would be featured on a magazine cover. Your respective publicists already know how to communicate to the publishing company your terms and conditions. Questions about your relationship are allowed, but to a certain number only. The rest will be about what’s mostly seen by fans and the rest of the public which is automatically your music. 

The concept is not necessarily daringly romantic. After all, what you’re trying to promote here is the clothes. But your chemistry is maintained with a few fleeting touches here and there. In one shot, you two were holding hands and the other has his arm is loosely wrapped around your neck. 

You and Soonyoung are careful to not get lost in each other’s eyes during the short breaks in between because the cameras were still rolling. Although, his soft touches on your hand and arm still lingered. On the other hand, you help him fix his hair whenever he gets excited and jumps from time to time. You could kiss him right now, but again, you want to be careful. 

The shoot concluded faster than you thought and the next thing you know, the two of you are sitting side by side with a camera blinking red in front, ready to record the interview included in the contract. 

The interview consisted of questions that’s nothing out of the ordinary. The magazine asked about your favorite go-to styles lately, your look inspirations, a little bit of this or that, your recent music releases or favorite music releases at the moment and of course something about your relationship that you're comfortable and willing enough to share. 

But one particular question caught you off guard that you had to hold your tears and brave through the rest of the interview without showing any signs that you’re about to cry.

“How have you guys been lately, individually?”

“I’ve been great,” you quickly answer with a smile that didn’t even reach your eyes. The camera may not have noticed, but Soonyoung did. It took a lot of patience and restraint for your boyfriend to stop himself from cutting the interviewer off to ask you again how you really have been. 

Everything that was in store for the two of you today ends and when the cameras are gone, you and Soonyoung hand in hand walk back to your dressing room. It’s a relief that this is the last project for the day and you’re glad you could get some rest for the coming week.

Your body slumps on the couch while the staff pack up. You puff out a breath before closing your eyes. You wish you could yell out how tired you are lately. Work piled up over the course of six months and you couldn’t have at least two days away from the makeup and flashing lights. 

Soonyoung bites his lower lip as he settles beside you. He’s contemplating whether he should ask you now or later because he doesn’t want you to grow conscious and shut yourself away. He knows how brave and strong you are. But he also wants you to know that you can trust him and that if you ever need a shoulder to cry or at least lean on, his are more than welcoming. 

“You okay, babe?” He asks in the quiet as the staff leaves one by one. “Anything bothering you?”

You surprise him by sitting up straight and opening your eyes, welling with tears. That makes him shoot up and instantly hug you close. “Oh baby.”

You finally cry and set free the tears that you’ve been locking deep within you. You thought you could brave through this pain and anxiety without having the need to shed any vulnerability. You thought this shall pass soon. You thought you could do this. 

But here you are now letting go with sniffles and shaking shoulders as Soonyoung gently caresses the top of your head. 

He hates to see you cry. But it’s only right to let you. 

“I just feel like I’m going to miss out on everything if I turn down any project offered to me.”

Soonyoung pouts when he hears what’s been bothering you. It took a while for you to calm down and finally talk, but it’s okay. He doesn’t mind. He will never mind. 

“I understand, honey,” he assures you and wipes your tear stained cheek. “And there’s nothing wrong with feeling that way.”

Your lips shake again and crying makes you want to hide. Without hesitation, you crawl to your boyfriend’s lap and wrap your arms around his shoulder. Soonyoung doesn’t complain and just keeps you close, protective arms around your waist.

The dressing room is empty except for the two of you. The staff got the message once Soonyoung pleaded with them through his eyes to give you some time with him since you’re already done for the day.

“It’s also okay to work and work,” he continues, soothing hands rubbing against your back. “But at some point, it’s also okay to take a break for them.”

You pull away and rest your hands on his neck. “Even though I’m going to miss out?”

Soonyoung nods and leans his forehead against yours. “Yes and there’s also nothing wrong with that.”

“I seriously want to go on a trip with my family,” you say and sigh. “And of course, with you too.”

Soonyoung can’t help but giggle. “I’d love to. How about next month? Let’s go somewhere with your family or friends. Where do you want to go? What do you want to do?”

Your boyfriend’s enthusiasm puts a smile on your face and this time, the smile reaches your eyes. “Let’s go somewhere quiet first. I want to take a long nap before we proceed to do anything that needs an awake body.”

“You got it, babe,” Soonyoung promises and kisses your lips.

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