#you dont understand the emotional damage he specifically is doing to me :(

[autism-corner]

augh look at my wife Y-Y

#some officials from twitter (i think) #PLEASE. #PLEASE.... #im on my knees begging ....... #theres NO food on ao3 sadly and :((( #augh you would NOT understand. #please. #piercings................. #from madness with love #please why is no one in this tag anymore i need people to talk to :( #sillyposting #I LOVE HIM SM OML. #you ever look at a man and just giggle because of how pretty he is??? <3 #AUGH. #you dont understand the emotional damage he specifically is doing to me :( #i need to print some pictures of him to put up in my room i wanna look at him 24/7 #augh if only i had a good bit of cardboard hed be such a good cutout... #WAIT maybe i do o.o... ooh.... #hed fit so well next to my seiko cutout theyre basically the same person.... #but unforts theres already a big poster i cant move so somewhere else'll have to do.... #WAIT. yes. i found the perfect spot. YAYYAYYAYAYYA #AUGH. AUGHAGUHAGUH. #insufferable pain bc my husband is too pretty.

[is-the-owl-video-cute]

I know personally as someone who was in my mid-late teens when I watched su, it really mattered to me to get to see a show that said parent figures aren't just right because they said so, and you DO deserve an apology when they hurt you, but one that also had the nuance to show that while you deserve reconciliation and apologies for being hurt by them, they also act with their own reasons and not usually out of a callous disregard for you. Like yes it obviously doesn't flat apply to full on abusive parents, but to parents who were neglectful without really meaning to be or being unable to do anything about it (like, parents who needed to always be at work or who couldn't be there for you) it's actually very relatable and well calculated. Ngl I think some people just dont know what to do with media they don't directly relate to or immediately understand. I did also see a lot of su criticals who tried to claim the show was about forgiving abusers for this exact reason, but I think you only really get that interpretation out of it if you think all media should be about you specifically

In all honesty, the diamonds really did show three different types of parents who are incredibly toxic and damaging to their children without meaning to hurt them.

Yellow is a workaholic, and holds a very strict no-nonsense attitude. She didn’t make time for Pink or treat her problems as legitimate until it was too late, but she did still very clearly care about her. She didn’t let her emotions show to anyone, least of all to herself because she saw them as an obstacle to what needed to be done.

Blue is her polar opposite, she suffered greatly from a loss and (in this case, correctly) blamed herself for every part of it while never actually processing or overcoming her grief. By not taking care of herself, she lashes out at others and cannot move forward. Before Pink was shattered, Blue was indignant, disdainful, and quick to take out frustrations on Pink when she felt “embarrassed” by her not conforming to their expectations.

White was condescending and more dismissive than the other two. Quick to belittle and intimidate to get her way. She loved Pink, yes, but more in the way one might love a nice coat. She was a perfectionist and projected that need to be right and perfect (literally) on every other gem, the other diamonds most of all as they are implied to be of her own creation. Her ego and inability to accept being wrong (or by extension, those she created doing what she decides is wrong) cause her to force Pink to fall into a role that she was never really suited to. She saw Pink as one of her greatest failures and something she needed to either fix or hide away.

All three of them together formed a very deeply toxic and emotionally abusive relationship towards each other and to Pink most of all. A few people take issue with Steven “forgiving” them as they misconstrue it as a victim forgiving abusers, but at the end of the day Steven is not nor was he ever Pink Diamond. He was mistaken for her and felt some of what she experienced because of that, but he was not a long-term victim the way Pink was, in a lot of ways he was an outsider who had context of the situation and wanted to step in to keep them from hurting anyone else.

More to the point, he doesn’t forgive any of them. He calls them out on their toxic behavior and tries to get the point across to each of them that the way they’ve been living isn’t healthy for anyone, and is actively traumatic not only to them but for everyone they hold power over. The end of the series sees him teaching them how to atone for some of what they’ve done and to help others heal, but he doesn’t stay with them, nor does he invite them to stay on earth despite extending that offer to just about every other gem he encountered. It’s established in the movie that he almost never visits any of them outside of his activism and subtly making sure they aren’t regressing into dangerous people again. In the epilogue series he is shown to be (rightfully) distrustful of Blue and Yellow as well as being openly afraid of White. He helped them feel closure for Pink and repaired the relationship the three of them had, and that was it. Even if he had been in that abusive environment for as long as Pink was, that isn’t an unreasonable response. Some victims of (unintentional!) emotional abuse do find catharsis in confronting their abuser once safely out of that situation and expressing the way that behavior harmed them. Some victims genuinely do want their abusers to become better and healthier people when the abusive traits stem from their own trauma or lack of emotional intelligence. There are other victims in the show who completely sever ties with their abusers and never interact with them again, so this wasn’t trying to push a narrative that victims MUST do that, it was giving people language and strategies to approach these conversations if that is something they want to attempt.

This was another of my famous rambles, but I suppose in conclusion I would say: whether SU crits liked it or not, the final arc of Steven Universe was absolutely helpful to people in toxic home environments. It also served as an allegory for queer children not being accepted by their parents for who they are, and how changing your perspective as a parent and accepting your child is legitimately a healthier option for everyone because to do otherwise just ensures you will lose them in every way that matters.

There’s just a lot of important takeaways from that arc, especially for children. I’m incredibly tired of seeing grown adults whining about it because they chose to take it literally. Well done on missing the point of a show for middle schoolers I suppose, but idk if you really just want to see all villains get killed for their villainy just go watch Breaking Bad or the lion king or something. There are plenty of shows where violence is the answer, there’s not any real point getting furious over one of the few that don’t use that as the ultimate conclusion.

#SU #it’s a show for queer children #the entirety of the Gem Society is meant as an allegory for queer people learning to accept themselves and to show #that society accepting queer people is a good thing for everyone #Steven Universe #Anti SU critical #Rebecca sugar #steven universe future

[nwarrior777]

another life blogging thoughts. it starts with me thinking about changing my username, but its much more than that. pls sorry if i write smth not clearly i really not in perfect mind condition

tw: life crisis, identity crisis, sad thoughts, stream of thoughts

advice ONLY if you have something really similar. support commentary is encouraged but only if they are specific (like "giving you some cookies!!! or giving you yellow blanket!! or "sending you a frog meme" etc etc)

iiii think i maybe want to change my username. is this a fckin middle crisis they were talking about.

like. nwarrior was ment that i am fighting against stereotypes against shitty normis Norms, homophobia, transphobia, fatphobia etc etc and shit and etc, to society, to myself. and like my fight is my art. buuut

last time i think more about that. i dont want it to be fight. like. i don't want it to prove something to these fuckers who do this awful evil things to us. why would i care about them? they will not stop doing their shit because i drew bodypositive art. but. then i draw representative art my followers will feel happy (i mean, i read comments so i can assume you do).

so i don't want to make a point of my representative art on fighting. it's not about showing evil guys that they are (shock!) evil, i want focus of my work to be on. spreading warm and positive and giving positive emotions. i mean, it doesn't change anything in my content itself, but more. of my attitude to it? i just always thought about it as my little contribution in an endless fight for our rights? but like.

as i said long ago, we, oppressed people, are always were are and will be the winners because we have the most great power of life itself - love. and oppressors can't steal it and it's so, so powerful. stealing is their trademark, but Love. you can't steal Love and make it into something bad. it's Love. they can lie, try to fake it, try to buy it. yk it's so funny, i just realize. they think they can do everything but they can't do the only thing in life that really matters (and no, i am not excluding aroace people from narrative here, Love is like. is something more here than sex or dating, try to understand me pls.)

so yeah i... i am sitting here and thinking that it's something more than a fight. it's a strange fight if we already have a winner but looser don't know about it and think that he is on the top and treats a winner like shit and a winner constantly need to prove that little fucker that prize is in their hands and looser think that prize is something different.

and so, yeah, i know that it is in fact a fight and we are fighting for our rights. but i am so tired of fighting. i recently figured out that i need to fight myself a g a i n because i thought i was much better at being good person, but no. i mean i have some progress but turned out i am so so so not enough and i am crying and have that thing in trout first time since idk then. and i thought, omg, do i have to fight myself again, like, feeling literally like i stubbing my heart (for people just thinking "lol that heart bit that edgy lol" - yeah, edgy, can i be """edgy"""" in my mental breakdown middle life crisis fckin letter feelings which i type without script, okay thanks!)

and i thought like.... maybe i can make something more

my trademark was a sword, like, warrior.... but now i am thinking more about... something warm. a cup of tea, spreading through your body, flower, fire. something like this? it would be nice like.... and it's really more helpfull to use to urself symbols of cup of tea and flowers and warmth then a sword. it's so much more calming and comforting.... yeah... i think i will think about it

my sword is like a toothpick to that evil voide around. my sword against that void in me - it's big damage. but. if i will give someone, including me, a nice warm cup of chamomile tea... the world will really become better.

[anti-katsuki-lounge]

Not sure if you are interested in receiving these sorts of asks anymore but I have lots of takes about missed potential in MHA because Hori IMO has a lot of good ideas but instead of developing them - leaves things half baked or takes questionable choices with them.

The Todoroki's - more specifically Todoroki Rei and Todoroki Fuyumi.

Todoroki Fuyumi - she had to basically act as mum to her younger brothers when her actual mum had a mental breakdown due to her father. That HAS to create some complicated feelings both with Rei (which is never explored) and Endeavor (which again is never explored bar Fuyumi's want of a happy family.) It also should be shown to have an affect on how her brothers see her (which is also rarely touched on.)

Todoroki Rei - It should have taken her WAY more for her to forgive Endeavor bar remembering her favourite flower. It comes across as seriously unhealthy that Hori put this in and it leaves a bad taste in my mouth that he's using this and her as a way to uplift Endeavor - especially when abusers acting like this IRL are usually doing it to manipulate you . IMO it would be more understandable for her to have an attitude similar to Natsuo or Shoto considering what she went through at the hands of Endeavor. It would also support that this facility is trying to make her get better rather than influencing her to think in a way that benefits Endeavor (letting those flowers through from someone who they know abused Rei is wrong IMO.)

It seems like Hori doesn't seem to want to show his women going through complicated or 'ugly emotions' like anger or hatred and this is a key example of that.

Additionally I feel like this storyline particularly as it is around such a sensitive topic should have been handled with more care. Particularly in regard to the "everyone is at fault" and the "Shoto is our families hero" sentiment Hori had Rei say.

It comes across as victim blaming and golden child (good victim- hero Shoto) vs scapegoat (bad victim - villain Touya). Something which a lot of NPD affected families have gone through at the hands of their NPD parents so no wonder those statements from Rei put a bad taste in peoples mouths.

A natural disaster didn't hit this family. The root cause (as Natsuo rightfully said) was Endeavor.

If Hori wants to redeem Endeavor (I dont think he should have - but not up to me) he should have let him take full responsibility and not retcon what had occurred to make Endeavor easier to stomach.

One of the greatest flaws in Endeavor’s arc is that outside of Shoto and Rei, we don’t really see how much it’s damaged the family. With Fuyumi, her desire to be a family again could be caused by Endeavor’s abuse but it isn’t explored nearly as much as it should’ve been. With Rei, this was a woman who couldn’t be in the same room as others, completely terrified of the world around her due to how Endeavor messed her up. Yet all it takes is one flower that she likes for her to suddenly be willing to forgive him? That’s just bad writing. In addition, like you’ve said, the series sometimes retcons actions of characters to make them look less bad, and one of those instances ends up being the moment where Endeavor hits Rei. All in all, compared to Katsuki’s arc, Endeavor’s is better written but still has extreme flaws.

#mha critical

[iceheap]

So it turns out that people are actually active her in Tumblr when it comes to the Aphmau fandom so wassup okay here's the thing.

I'm a veteran aarmau shipper. I know he messed shit up in MCD but I think that's the writers doing shit not Aaron's fault specific so uhhh hmu in the asks if y'all wanna hear my headcannons or rewrite or whatever. I've seen a few people around doing little rewrites and whatnot so I figured I'd do mine while staying true to the aarmau aspect. As much as I can anyway.

So yeah rewrite aspect 1: Aaron's cold and quiet and snappish because he's greiving, not because it's his personality. Give him a healing arc. THEN have him catch feelings. He's upset he's caught feelings. Wow, being in love is shit, fuck this.

Denial. Heavy denial. I'm not in love. Nope. I'm just learning how to feel emotion's again, yeah that's totally it lol haha

Anger. Wow I'm such a shitty person. My wife and son are dead while I'm over here pining over this random really pretty and smart and intelligent and of equal status to me girl who's a lord and understands my struggles. I'm such a bad person. Fuck me.

Bargening. It's fine! I can be a little in love, I just won't say anything! It'll go away if I avoid her. If I push Laurance and Garroth her way, she'll choose one eventually and I won't be in love anymore!

Depression. She's never gonna love me back. I'm a fuck up, why would she love me back. I don't want her to love me back, I'm just damaged goods, whats so special about me anyways.

Acceptance. I'm in love with her. I won't tell her because I don't want to be in love with her. I'll be happy with whatever guy she chooses. This is a passing crush and it'll go away, and even if it doesn't, that's okay.

They move in toghether. He makes her breakfast. He holds her hand when they go to and from their little training feild. He teaches her how to whittle wood.

Aphmau herself is less passive than in the series. She's serious and stands up for herself more, less of a damsel in distress, and he makes her laugh with sarcastic quips and quiet jokes.

Aaron knows how to knit and tailor. He used to in his spare time before everything went to shit, so he starts making Lilith Garnet clothes. He makes Aphmau a beautiful flowing dress for every day wear with leather accents to add on as armor and Aphmau treasures it greatly.

He can't cook for shit.

He only builds half their house because he's stupid and has no self preservation and almost breaks his back when he falls of the roof like a dumbass.

He finally wears a shirt after soneome gifts him one, having realized he doesn't wear one for the asthetic✨, it's because he's poor af and lost his mind to the lust for revenge and wasnt thinking of functioning for a while there.

He actually gets help when he breaks Garroth out of the Irene dimension and doesn't sacrifice himself for no fucking reason.

Garroth is salty but they learn to get along.

One day Garroth is like at least you treat her like a queen and Aaron is like wym and Garroth is like bro y'all are dating wym wym and Aaron is like we are. What.

He asks Aphmau and she's like Aaron you make me breakfast, do all the chores, kis my hand good night, every night, tuck in OUR daughter, make me breakfast in bed, and run our finances. I thought we were in a queer platonic relationship at least. We don't have to date if u dont want to but yeah I kind of assumed.

Aaron's like well shite. Did I accidentally seduce my crush. Wtf happened. What is happening.

They defeat Shad as a group toghether idk. Aphmau isn't Irene because that plotline and reveal was STUPID. She's a decendant of Irene and nothing more fuck all y'all.

There that's my Aaron. Hmu if u want more of him, might post more anyways because fuck man they did him so dirty.

#aaron lycan #aarmau #aphmau #aphmau mcd #minecraft diaries

[fratboykate]

I don’t know who I am more sad for. Ereka, Yelena, or poor chubby baby Wuss who just wants one of his mommies to hold him.

I’m sad for Kate, but for different reasons than the rest of them. She needs to gain some perspective for two minutes. I totally understand where she’s coming from, and like she must have the patience of a fucking SAINT because Tom would be on his ass if it were me, but she’s being so bullheaded in trying to protect Ri from future regret that she’s enabling present stress.

Either way, Ri is already going to have a little bit of trauma over all of this. And I think she’s just going to look back at Tom with resentment over the fact that he’s not ACTUALLY spending time with her. I mean, that we see at least, right?? Because in my mind he is just wasted off his ass 24/7. No amount of going over to my dads house asa child is going to make me less resentful toward him, dead or alive, if he’s so clearly choosing to use me as a pawn to get back at my mom or throw himself a putty party. Honestly not sure what Tom’s angle is anymore. Maybe he’s just fucking sad but like damn.

Yelena sure isn’t helping any of this but goddammit does she love that child. And hate Tom, but honestly she is so real and valid for that. I am probably the saddest for her in this specific moment because oh my god…how heartbreaking. She absolutely hasn’t been respected or prioritized in any of this, and Kate needs to understand how shitty she’s making her wife feel!!!!!! And for what!? Because it doesn’t really feel like it’s for Ri right now. It feels like she’s telling herself it’s for Ri but it’s at least partially coming from a place of projection and her own wishes and regrets.

You wound me. I’m also whipped for all this emotional damage you’re inflicting.

Also all this passive aggressive “she’s YOUR child”!?!? STOP IT MY HEART HURTS. Some of us don’t like eating nails for breakfast!!

"she’s being so bullheaded in trying to protect Ri from future regret that she’s enabling present stress" AND "it doesn’t really feel like it’s for Ri right now. It feels like she’s telling herself it’s for Ri but it’s at least partially coming from a place of projection and her own wishes and regrets" DING DING DING DING you found the daddy issues she's been hiding lol

once again, it's all about whose perspective you look at it from and one of my favorite things in character work is making characters who GENUINELY believe theyre doing the right thing and you could actually argue that they ARE correct...BUT when you take a step back and see it from a different angle they're also very wrong. i think that's obviously a great recipe for villains but you can also write really interesting flawed heroes that way.

clarke in CFAU is a great example of this. kate in MAU is another. i dont think either of them were ever wrong but they're not right either and i think that's what makes them and their struggles compelling.

i mean...ri does spend time with him and his family. they're a big, loud, tight-knit family (of drunks but...still lol). tom lives with his mom since him and kate got divorced (because he's absolutely one of those coddled momma's boy. part of the problem) and the entire family is always over at the matriarchs house so she DOES spend tiem with these people who - again, in their very flawed way - do love her and consider her an important part of the family. they're all just fucked up.

#kymau #anonymous #answers

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

do you think we should forgive people who havw hurt us? even if they aren't sorry or even aware of the hurt theyve caused? you dont hava to respond to this if you dont want to , but i am just thinking, is it actually wise to let specific people exist in my life , (a parent) when they are delusionally unaware of the lifelong damage theyve caused me (and will never understand), or anyone really. Is there a point in.. getting angry, when they oncr again show that they really dont know or care. Still, i enjoy talking to them. So im thinking that maybe forgiving would be better . but i feel like that way i might be gaslighting myself. Have you ever read anything on this?

there is a good book on this anon, "adult children of emotionally immature parents", u can read it online for free if u google the PDF. it is monumentally eye opening. other than that, i can speak from my own experience w/ my parents. i'll put it under readmore cus im bout to get a lil personal;

so, basically, i have one parent, my mom, because my dad has been dead for over 15 years. my parents were alcoholics who worked full time dead end jobs and we never had a close relationship, but i was closer to my dad. when he died, my mom absolutely lost her mind, like, maybe this is dramatic but i do pretty much consider myself an orphan because in 2006 i lost both of them. my mom chose booze, despite the fact that it made her act completely volatile and disturbed, she chose the liquor over me n my sister. my sister is an extrovert and she started spending All her time at other ppl's houses so i was constantly alone with my mom. the emotional abuse she dealt me after my dad's death i think are the wounds within me that truly can never be healed. worse than having to watch him die. my mother would berate me for everything i did, my appearance, the fact i was flunking school, my friends, and most of all, she would always remind me that i am a bad daughter who doesn't love her enough. once i started w the suicide attempts her abuse and guilt trips only got worse. i made a lot of reckless decisions just trying to get away from her. i still feel immeasuable guilt that she is my only living parent but i can't be her daughter. i havent seen her in 3 years..

now that the context is out of the way, here's how i feel about forgiveness: you HAVE to forgive. you have to. for your own sake. to free yourself. for me, when im so so belligerently angry at my mom, i imagine her as a child. i think of her childhood where she was born to a 16 y/o polish ww2 orphan girl and a 17 y/o fatherless boy who had already been thru several detention camps + was forced to join the navy to avoid jail time. i think of the stories she'd tell me from her childhood where she constantly moved from trailer park to trailer park, the caretaker of her 3 younger sisters while her parents worked, her dad often disappearing for months at a time w no explanation, her mother in and out of psych wards. she's always casually bringing up how her parents would beat her if the trailer wasn't spotless when they got home. she was mercilessly bullied at school for being poor so she's never had many friends. she never got any education and has worked retail/cashier positions her whole life. she had to watch her husband slowly waste away, then go right back to work so we could just barely afford to eat. i think of all these factors and it's so so easy to forgive her, despite it all. like if i could reach into her chest and grab her heart and pour all of the forgiveness inside of me into her body just so she could feel happy and light for one single day, i would do it. we are all so broken and forgiveness is the only way we can ever put things back together.

that being said anon...i still have an immensely hard time talking to her. every time we talk on the phone she immediately just starts dumping all of her problems onto me, like how she used to do when i was a kid and she was drunk. she refuses to acknowledge she could ever possibly benefit from therapy. she can't even begin to acknowlege the ways she hurt and abused me. she is deeply, deeply emotionally immature. when i talk to her it rly feels like im talking to a severely damaged child. our conversations are short. i dont tell her anything about my life, i never have. we'll never be close, i've accepted it. sometimes i have days where i'm so angry at her that im ready to send myself to the psych ward over it. but the damage is done, it cant be taken back, only moving forward. and at the end of the day, i forgive her. and i want her to be ok.

i'm not sure what's happened to you with your parent anon, but just know, you can forgive from afar, you don't have to keep engaging with them if they continuously harm you. i really really reccomend reading adult children of emotionally immature parents. its only like 200 pages and you'll fly through it. like i said, available for free as a pdf online. i wish you the best anon and im sorry you have to go thru this but you're not alone. #<333

[matches-is-meow]

Hello! I'm here to request a romantic MHA matchup if you could please! I'm a 16 year old female but I look and act mature for my age(due to trauma) so I often get mistaked as an 18 year old or even older sometimes. Some good qualities of mine are maturity, level headedness, and then I can be motherly. Some bad traits can include bluntness, coming off as cold, and stubbornness. I'm an introvert so i hate being around crowds and speaking infront of people I also have social anxiety so that doesn't help... I would much prefer staying at home watching anime and petting my pets than going out... More of my fun and loud side comes out around my friends or the right people. My hobbies or things I enjoy include hanging out with friends, swimming, listening to music, art, laying in bed on my phone, animals(I want to work with animals as a job), watching anime, the ocean(I love water if I could choose a quirk it would be water based), stargazing(I love galaxies, the moon and stars I find everything so fascinating), the colors black, blue, purple, then finally goth/emo style and aesthetic! Some dislikes of mine are bananas, P.E./sports(volleyball is okay tho), and men/father figures in my life-. My music taste includes the artists, The Neighborhood, Girl In Red, The Arctic Monkeys, Billie Eilish, Melanie Martinez, Alec Benjamin, Corpse, and Conan Gray! I'm bisexual/omnisexual so either gender could work but in mha I lean towards having a stronger preference for the guys compared to the girls so do with that what you will. Traits I dislike in others are immaturity, impatience, disrespect, pushing boundaries, and not listening. Traits I look for in others are respect, kindness, understanding, patience, and humor. A bit about my appearance is I have longish black hair, pale skin, freckles, i'm a bit chubby, and tall(5'8). Im also very insecure and I doubt myself a lot but I'm trying to work on that! Some love languages include words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch and sometimes acts of service. I have mental and physical health issues so I would need someone who could accept and be able to handle that. I would also need someone that would accept that I have trauma as well. I would want this relationship to be a two way thing so its very important that they give the same effort I'm giving into the relationship. I would prefer not to be matched with Denki, Bakugou, Iida, Tokoyami or any adult since I'm a minor. I think thats it... I'm sorry if I missed anything you needed or if this is to long! I understand if you don't get to me right away! I hope your having a nice day! Thank you!

alrighhhhtttttt girly pop thanks so much for asking, i really appreciated the specificity in the ask. and look, i know you said that you you leaned to the guys but i feel like you would mesh really well with Tsuyu if you didnt specify a dude. yall have similar vibes. But i eventually just decided against it, but uhhhhh heres your matchup!! i had a ton of fun writing this one.

and your matchup isss…… *drumroll*

Shoto Todoroki (yay!)

Todoroki made a very conscious effort not to get crushes on anybody, ever. He had seen how damaging relationships could get, and there was always an ambiguous fear that he would turn out like his father. Sooo very celibate he was.

until uh oh spegettio!! you dont choose who you are and what you love in this world!!!

He would not consider himself hot headed; he would not. He would not consider himself cold hearted; he would not. But somehow emotion flowed and ebbed easier with sensible, level headed you around.

or maybe…

maybe it was the time you sat him down and asked him how he was doing. What? Why did you ask him, what favor did you owe him? was this… just your nature? to care about people, care about him?

what probably reallllly did him in was the brief glimpses of affection you gave him. Little shoulder touches here, the touch of an arm there, barely noticeable to anyone not utterly starved of affection.

Todoroki is very starved of affection.

He would pine, long, and yearn for so long before asking you on a date. It would be weeks, months, years, even if he could wait that long.

He would ask you out in a carefully planned scenario with every variable double and triple checked.

he probably wrote a script of what he was going to say and deadass pulled it out to you in front of your face.

hes trying his best honey

He was very awkward at first, but after a couple of dates,,,,, oooh boy, he treats you like a queen.

he is so determined to not be like his dad that he will literally be the textbook definition of ”healthy stable relationship”

Mans opens the door, pulls out the chair, splits the check, after you beg for half of it, glares at mineta, remembers your birthday,, wow.

and. the best thing of all. is how he gets it. he knows how it is to just HATE. your father figure and to have a lot of trauma. he feels just such empathy because hes been there.

If you wanna rant, he's there.

you wanna pretend that father figures are just a societal hallucination, he’s there

if you wanna be held close, he’s there.

he thinks your so great, by the way. you ground him with your honesty when he feels like the world is drifting away a bit, and, not to be weird but he feels super happy on the inside that you have social anxiety because he gets a little scared that something bad might happen to you, and he loves quality time with his queen!

Also, sweetie, he has a sixth sense for when you feel insecure so just be prepared to be overly showered in love and affection when every you complain about yourself.

He is definitely a fan of nicknames, kinda gives darling and love kind of vibes.

oh, and one more thing.

he will kill for you.

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

hey hidey hey! I have no clue what possessed me with the kinda edgy ending there, but Todoroki would not date someone he is not prepared to risk it all for, sooooooo yeah. Tysm internet person, it was a really neat profile to work with.

#bnha matchups #mha matchups #shoto todoroki #bnha #mha #matchups open

[xalwaysagustx]

The Hearts Desire - Chapter 2

Summary:

When Van Helsing feels he should help a young girl who stood upon a bridge in the dead of night, he signs himself up for one hell of a ride. Can these two help each other heal from the emotional damages inflicted upon them from their past?

Parts:

1 | 2 |

Blue colored ceiling, like the sky but clear of all clouds, nothing to ruin such a perfect day. The first time she felt peaceful, in her life? Maybe, maybe not, at least from what she can remember.

"Agh.." She took a deep breath, groaning from the pain that filled her chest. Her thoughts were a mix of 'where am I?' And 'am I dead?' She'd imagine death would he peaceful, not this painful... She turned her head, sleepy eyes meeting a man sitting on a chair. His arms were crossed infront of his chest but despite that fact he looked peaceful and at rest. Who... where..?

She tried to move up in the bed but started coughing, that's when Van sat up, looking towards the bed where the coughing continued.

"Hey, easy." He laid her head up against a pillow so she was sitting up.  She looked up to him with confused eyes, Van thought she looked like a sad puppy.

"Who?" She asked sleepily. Van sat down gently on the edge of the bed,

"I apologize if I startled you, my name is Abraham Van Helsing." She looked at him, still confused.

"It's uh nice to meet you.." She managed to say back.

"I know you're probably confused, I am aswell. Do you remember anything?"

Thinking for no more than a second her eyes teared up and she started to panic,

"Oh, I have to leave!" She tried to get out of thr bed but tumbled as she started to her feet.

"Woah!" Van grabbed ahold of her,

"No, you need to rest." He sat her on the bed,

"Just lie down."

She struggled "You dont understand!"

Just then, the door opened quickly,

"Are you guys alright, I heard a bang- Oh she's awake." Lupin realized.

"Yeah, help me settle her down please!" Van asked, in what Lupin would describe as the most calm panic he'd ever seen.

"Alright." Lupin walked over to her and laid a hand on her back, "Just sit and talk to us for a minute, please?" She looked at Lupin endearingly, she felt like she had too listen, he seemed very convincing.

"Okay" She put her head down, Van loosened his grip on her shoulders and helped her back into an upright lying position.

He stood back up and looked down to her on the bed, she looked so distraught and upset.

She started,

"Truly, I'm grateful to you for saving my life, but I should have just died on that bridge..." Lupin and Van looked at eachother with concerned faces

"Don't say such a thing." Lupin replied. Her face was one of sorrow and fear, there was plenty she wasn't telling them and Van was certain she had a good reason. He laid his hand on her shoulder,

"Lupin is right, you shouldn't say such things." His brows knit together with concern.

She wiped the tears from her face, even though they kept falling into her lap.

"No, really! I'm nothing but a nuisance. You're all in danger just with me being here." She sobbed harder the more she spoke. Van Helsing sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed,

"If you can explain to us your situation, we may be able to help." She lifted her tear filled eyes and looked at him, full of fear.

"You don't understand..." the action he took was bold, too bold for him and far from what could be expected out of the "cold hearted, war hero."

He took her hand and looked directly into her eyes,

"Help me understand." Her eyes lit up with a spark of comfort, like no one had ever showed her such a kind gesture before in her life. Lupin sat idly by, secretly shocked, but hopeful he'd get through to her.

She took a deep breath, looking down to her lap.

"Well... since as long as I can remember, I belonged to a family in the Mafia." The room got reasonably uncomfortable at the mention of the Mafia. While London specifically had mostly pleasant Mafia activity, the bad always hid out in the shadows to not be seen.

"I don't mean I have a mom and a dad, I mean since as long as I remember, I lived in a Mafia family." Her body slightly shook, he could see it on her face, how rough her life must have been.

"My whole life, all I've known was that I was set to be with a certain someone. He was the son of the current Mafia leader while we were little. Recently, though, he took over the family. His father died sooner than expected." She looked up towards them,

"I'm sure you know where this is going. It was an arranged marriage. Of course I knew it would happen one day, but I hated it. I'm simply a slave to him, to do whatever he wishes whenever he wishes." She swallowed hard, nearing closer to tears again. Her voices broke as she spoke up once more.

"The reason we were at that bridge... It was my fault, I upset him. He decided he didn't need me anymore, he sent me along with those men. They figured no one else would be out, given it was so late." Van gripped her hand tightly, hearing this made his heart ache, he was thanking God he was made to stay out late at work.

"Of course, you scared them off." She smiled softly, maybe the first smile they saw from her. "But the thing is... If he ever finds out I'm still alive, nothing will stop him from killing anyone in his path to make sure I'm his or no one's." Her smile faded away. Here sat a girl doomed to never be free from the chains of what she was born into.

"And so it's dangerous for me to be here, its not safe for you guys!" She pleaded. "I don't want to hurt anyone else.." Her voice quivered.

"Miss, this the safest place possible" Lupin started,

"We aren't in any danger, I know you don't know us, but if you could trust in us right now we can help you." He smiled, again she felt compelled to believe anything and everything this man said.

“I just don’t think your guys understa-“ Van Helsing held his hand up and shushed her,

“Certainly, miss, you underestimate us.” He looked at her and she looked down.

“If anyone gets hurt I don’t think I could forgive myself.”

“You aren’t the problem here, miss. Just stay here for awhile, recover, we’ll figure everything out soon enough.” Van replied, standing up from the chair.

“Indeed, get some sleep for awhile, we’ll leave you be.” Lupin turned to exit the room, Van following behind. She felt herself relax, still feeling sleepy.

“Thank you!” She exclaimed to them, even after the door was shut. She felt so thankful to whoever was watching over her, to send such wonderful people into her life just before it was almost lost. She prayed deeply that they would be okay.

<-------------------------- ♧ ------------------------->

Van helping let out a rather loud sigh behind the now shut door, Lupin feeling the same way.

“We ought to stop bringing home lost girls or Saint will kick us out” Lupin joked, nervously laughing hoping it didn’t have any truth to it.

“Maybe he wont mind if we bring one back for him, heh.”

“Well, it seems this one is yours, hm?”

Van Helsing hastily tried to brush him off, he didn’t really think through his actions when he was trying to get through to her. After all he’d been through, he saw himself in her and knew how to help. This didn’t mean he was in love with her though, which is what Lupin surely was implying. No, he just met her, he’s simply helping her out, giving out a little hope to a lost soul.

“What- don’t just ignore me and walk away!” Lupin exclaimed following Van as he walked away.

“Why are you so good at ignoring me…”

“I’ve practiced”

Lupin smiled, pretending to not be annoyed. His mind was quickly again occupied with the girl in the room they has just left, they have already had a run in with the mafia once before. To put it simply, it wasn’t pretty. His now wife, Cardia had been kidnapped along side the daughter of another mafia boss, Shirley. The Gordon Family was a very kind, fair, mafia family and in the end everyone had worked together to get back the ones they loved. But everyone now knows how horrifying the mafia can be, neither of them wanted to think about this poor girls life growing up.

“we probably should have asked things such as her name, age, the name of the mafia… But i really wanted her to get some rest first, and shell be safe here. Im gonna go back up and watch out for anything.” Van spoke up as they made their way down the stairs. “I’ll let you deal with everyone’s questions, I’m going to grab more water and food for her.”

“Alright, always giving me the shit job, aye? You were the one who brought her home- oh bloody hell stop walking away from me!” Lupin cursed him as he made his way to the kitchen.

“Give me a break” Van yelled.

After collecting a pitcher of water along with some snack’s he placed them on a tray and headed again upstairs, turning the corner and landing back at the room where the girl stayed. He creaked the door open ever so slightly, to make sure not to wake her. But turning to set the items on the bedside table he realized she wasn’t sleeping at all, she was sobbing. Her face was turned away from him, she probably hadn’t even heard him enter. Van Helsing was never good at comfort, everyone regards him as “cold” and “emotionless” and would never expect him to care enough for anyone to offer emotional comfort. He himself, hardly thought he cared. Or maybe he tried to pretend not to care, but his heart had a dull ache for this young girl, and he didn’t know why, he had only just met her. Whether he was emotionless or just held them back, she made him want to comfort her and he didn’t know how to deal with that.

“Hey..” he spoke up, she visibly jumped and turned her head around.

“Oh! Im sorry I.. I thought you guys had left…” she hastily wiped the tears from her eyes and worked herself back onto the other side of the bed, to face him.

“I had, but I came back up to watch out for you. The mafia isn’t a joke for certain.” When he said that her face filled with worry, noticing he quickly too back his words,

“I mean, if someone was sent, not that they could know where we are, you wouldn’t be able to defend yourself in this state. But truly, don’t worry too much about it, that’s why I’m here.”

She relaxed, but still held the frown that she’d came with, yet to let go of it.

“Please don’t cry, everything will be okay.” Van let out, surprising himself. He didn’t look unsure of himself however, and she bursted into tears. He panicked,

“Wait I um!” He placed his hand on her arm and she grabbed ahold of him, bringing him into a hug. He gasped and fell into leaning on the bed. Sitting there in shock for a moment, he slowly and gently placed his arms around her. His expression relaxed into a soft, sad smile.

“I know…” He did know, he was under control once, too.

“God sent me such an angel.” She choked out into his shoulder. An angel? That’s the last thing he would expect to hear from anyone about him. He was more of a monster than an angel.

Slowly, she regained her composure and when she pulled away Van could see on her face that she needed that, she was the most relaxed she had been since she got there. She laid back down, Van lifted himself from the bed and pulled the blanket back up to her.

“Miss, may I ask your name?” He asked, sitting down in the chair beside the bed.

“Mhm, its Evelyn.” She sighed, still worked up from crying.

“It’s nice to have met you, Evelyn. If you aren’t up to it, tell me, but if you could give me more information I’d id like to ask a few questions? I’d like to know as much as possible, to keep you out of harms way.” He asked tenderly, in all honesty she has felt the best shes felt in a very long time, talking to him about all of this felt like a calming idea.

“I’m up for it.” She replied. Van smiled, very slightly. She noticed how his happy expression is always so light, like he doesn’t think he should be happy.

“First… Tell me about yourself, do you have any hobbies? How old are you?” Van smirked, she started laughing slightly.

“Hehe, hobbies? I wonder how that will help you keep me out of harms way.” She smiled, smiled, he liked that. When she smiled, it made him wanna smile. This is what Lupin would call love at first sight, but that doesn’t happen to Abraham Van Helsing. Not that he would believe in such a thing anyway.

“Well, I don’t want to run at you with all these difficult, hurtful questions to start you off, miss.”

“I really appreciate that. Um, what did you say your name was again? I apologize I’m terrible with names.” She asked him, with curious eyes.

“It’s Abraham Van Helsing.” He told her, expecting her to know the name. Hesitating because of it.

“That’s such a lovely name, your parent chose well.” She smiled. A name that people associate only with war, she saw it as lovely.

“I’m 18, by the way. I also enjoy baking and gardening. Before everything occurred, I would tend to the garden and work with herbs.”

“An herbalist, hm?” He inquired, impressed.

“Well, I’m not sure about that…” She looked away shyly “Thats a pretty formal title, for what I did.”

“Still, impressive.” She smiled, no one even appreciated her work when she did it. Van shifted, worried to ask the next question.

“Miss, might I ask the name of the mafia family who you were apart of?” He looked at her, praying this wouldn’t upset her too much.

“It’s Crudele.”

Van Helsing stared at her, confusion filled his features.”

“That… Are you sure? I don’t think that’s possible..” He asked, even if he heard it correctly the first time.

“Avido Crudele. He died recently, but he was the only leader who I have known. I don’t know any history, but its now led by his son, Percy Crudele.” She explained thoroughly, worried she said something wrong.

“Miss, Avido Crudele isn’t dead.” He stated firmly. She looked at him confused, that can’t be? He is dead, or else Percy would have never took his spot, he never came back from that ship so where could he be? Van Helsing sat back in the chair.

“This just got complicated…”

#code realize #fanfic #fanfiction #anime #cottagecore #my writing #writer #writers on tumblr #writing #van helsing #abraham van helsing #arsene lupin code realize #otome #otome guys #otomate #oneshot

[h2bakugou]

hello! May I please have a Dabi x fem reader in the lov who likes to draw? I think she finds his scars and stuff to be a work of art in itself and is like (oh heck I gotta sketch this). He glances at what she’s drawing and she gets all flustered! Maybe he even takes his shirt off at one point which can lead to some other things~ (I like smut but if you think fluff fits the prompt better that’s alright with me!) Thank you and I love your writing!

a/n: hii! of course love! this is super sweet omg i love dabi, i feel like i dont capture his character very well but imma try like hell😩😩this is probably ooc for him but it’s sappy and i love it

summary: dabi’s hard to read, but that doesn’t stop you from sketching him. you find beauty in his flaws, entranced by his scars, so much so that dabi can’t help but be interested in you.

key: (y/n) - your name / (f/n) - first name / (l/n) - last name / (e/c) - eye color / (h/c) - hair color / (y/q) - your quirk

warnings: swearing, fluff, sappy romance bc i love this man, some spicy themes, one mention of a slight(possible? idrk what counts) manga spoiler (e.g. dabi’s past/history) (manga spoilers in tags!!)

wordcount: 2k

;cut due to suggestive themes;

»»————-　★　————-««

»»————-　★　————-««

It’s never been a really big secret that you liked drawing. But when it comes to working for the league, specifically, the League of Villains, your line of work doesn’t allow for very much downtime unless you’re in the midst of planning some sort of attack or rebellion.

Whether or not the league keeps hopping from rendezvous spot to rendezvous spot isn’t up to you, but you never fail to get a little used to the eerily calming silence that falls upon the league during the first twenty-four hours of the new four walls that seem to keep you safe for the time being.

With a barely sharpened pencil in your hand, a small drawing pad in the other, you’re staring at Dabi as you sketch him.

It started as a bit of a joke, maybe just teasing him since he liked to tease you about being into him since you were the only one he was really super close, if you could call being the first one he spoke to every time he saw you or the one you sought out to be paired up with during missions, ‘super close.’

But now, it was something you enjoyed.

Dabi was one among the very interesting members of the league. Something about his scars just seemed to entrance you. Pulling you in further and further down a rabbit hole of questions that you had but never let leave past your lips.

It felt wrong to ask, not that it was a bad thing to be curious, but because Dabi was just so mysterious. No one knew anything about him, or about who he was, his past, even his real name was a mystery. 

It felt wrong to disturb the unnerving peace that was Dabi. The resting expression on his features balancing on a thin cable between anger and poor personal resilience.

Dabi’s scars were the highlight of your sketches, always standing out. What the others may have thought to be ugly, or unattractive, you thought were beautiful, and emotional.

There was a story behind them, one you wanted to know, one you wanted to uncover and read, page by page, line by line, and word for word, discovering just how truly deep Dabi’s past was. But only Dabi could show you that, only Dabi could open that book for you. And you were willing to wait. You’d wait an eternity if you had too.

His rough raven hair is messy and strewn about as you scribble down his facial features, the groggy lighting making it just a tad difficult to see as you lead the pencil over the warm white paper littered with graphite covered fingerprints.

His arms are positioned on a counter, the art work resembling how he was sitting sloped against the kitchen table, elbows pressed against the dark mahogany wood, hands resting by his mouth as his cerulean eyes peer off at the cracked cement wall in front of him, occasionally glancing back at you.

The other members of the league were scattered about but it didn’t bother you. Toga asked you a couple of questions, wondering what you were doing, if you were excited about the new plans and such.

You replied quietly as to not disturb the peace.

But soon some of the members left, going off to go eat or find something to do. And soon you were among the few left behind, along with Dabi, Shigaraki and Mr. Compress.

Having almost finally finished your current sketch, you were stopped by a pair of hands picking up your drawing pad. Rough and calloused fingers drew your pad away and your attention away.

“Hey I’m not finished.” You glanced up at Dabi. Dabi just admired the talent poured into the sketch. Dabi couldn’t wrap his head around why you drew him so often, but he didn’t mind. It was kind of touching in a way.

“Is that really what I look like?” Dabi joked, handing you back your sketch pad.

“You have looked in a mirror once before, right?” You titled your head to the side, adding a bit more detail to his scars as you began to draw again. 

“A few times. But I’d rather look at you, doll.” Dabi’s hands reached down again, this time pulling at your hands. Leading you out of the room where the other two members sat, finding a way to entertain themselves, Dabi lead you up some stairs in questionable condition.

Picking a random room, he sat down on the rickety bed and waited for you to sit down.

“Why’s that?” You tease, returning to drawing, looking up at him every few seconds to reference. And to admire him.

“You’re easy on the eyes, beautiful and-”

“Are you saying you’re not beautiful, Dabi?” You stopped him, not pausing to look at him.

“I’m not beautiful, I’m gorgeous.” Dabi chuckled, shaking his head jokingly as he laid back against the bed, his head dangling off the opposite end.

“You are.” You confirm. Finally finishing up your sketch. You get up and walk over to him, handing him the finished sketch. 

“You add so much detail to my scars. They’re just scars.” The tips of Dabi’s ears flush as heat floods to his face. He’s flustered but he won’t admit it. He can’t understand why you think he’s so beautiful.

You don’t speak. For the first time, you’re speechless. You sit down beside Dabi, and now that he’s sitting up, he faces you.

You reach your hands out and gently lift one of his arms, holding one of his hands in your own. You run your fingers across the scarred flesh, gently caressing his skin. 

His hands are cold compared to your warm fingers. He’s getting chills all down his spine as you touch him. It’s not meant to be anything out of the ordinary, but he’s still shocked that he’s letting you touch him.

“Your scars are beautiful. I’m sure there’s a story, something about them that might make you hate them, but I love them, and I think they make you that much more beautiful. You are a masterpiece, every scar a carefully calculated brushstroke on a beautiful canvas.” Your words finally come out, overflowing with love. You can’t sit quietly anymore.

“Dabi you are beautiful.” Your eyes lock with his, and you can tell he’s unsure of what to do. 

Dabi no longer felt he had the ability to cry, but if he’d let himself, he would’ve done it in that moment. Being so open and vulnerable around you just happened. It came too easily, and he hated it, but he loved you.

Pulling his arm away form your warm touch, he tossed his jacket off and to the side before tearing his shirt away from his body, allowing you to see his chest, and more of his scar covered skin.

Sitting quietly with a faint blush on your cheeks, you couldn’t look away. trying to avoid staring directly at his toned chest and his nipples, you raised your hand and allowed your fingers to sink down across his sternum.

Soon your fingers were met with his abs, which the heat on your face noticed far too well. 

“Say it again.” Dabi mumbled. You lifted your head to look into his eyes again, your hand still resting against his chest.

“You are beautiful-” The moment the words left your lips, Dabi’s own lips were pressed against yours. Kissing you roughly, more than he intended too, his hands mangled into yours, pushing your arms over your head.

His heart was pounding and it felt like it was going to beat right out of his chest onto yours. Pulling away for a few seconds, Dabi’s hair covered his eyes as he looked down, finding interest in the collar of your shirt.

“I want you.” Dabi’s words were simple, but they didn’t have to be complex. You knew what he meant, and you knew what he wanted. You wanted it too. A chance to see him in a different light, with deeper meaning.

A chance to connect with him, one on one. 

“Then take me.” Your fingers intertwined with his, your arms still resting above your head. It didn’t take long for his lips to magnetize back to yours, sticking to them like glue.

When Dabi thought about sex, he didn’t come anywhere close to making love. There wasn’t that sort of option when it came to him. He didn’t think he was at all capable of love, let alone a relationship that was going to have any sort of emotional connection strong enough to make him feel stable.

But you, you were so vastly different from anyone he’d ever fucked. So different from an excuse to get his dick wet, to get his mind off of league business or heaven forbid, his past.

But you, you were what he needed, what he wanted. It was far from therapy, but it’d work. Having you around was like a drug, addicting, and he’d be going through withdrawals if he couldn’t have you.

Feeling you, touching you, fucking you, kissing you, it was fuel to his fire. He was damaged goods, broken and shattered, impossible to put together, but you were doing your best, working on the smallest parts, exercising precautions, and opening your heart to him.

Hearing his name in the form of your moans as he rutted into you, your legs wrapped tightly around his hips drove him wild, much like the way your hands tangled into his hair, forcing his head into your chest where he kissed and sucked on your skin, leaving marks.

Your moans and his own grunts of pleasure were spewing from the locked room. Dabi didn’t care if the others heard, he was enjoying the moment.

Every part of it. Every part of you, every part of your body, your words, your love. And before he knew, Dabi was at his highest, his face flush against your naked chest, breathing heavily as he inhaled your scent.

Still inside you, he didn’t move, allowing the two of you to catch your breath. It was in this moment, if Dabi allowed himself to cry, he would’ve cried a second time. He was so infatuated with you, so attached.

“I love you.” Your words scared him, causing his cerulean eyes to peak at you through locks of his noir hair.

“That’s stupid.” Dabi kissed your sternum, kissing up your chest, stopping at your neck to leave a little mark, only to meet at your lips in the end.

“How?” You ask softly, your hands massaging his scalp as his lips hover over yours.

“I can’t explain it, it just is.” Dabi frowned, trying to understand what your eyes were saying as they clouded with emotion.

“Love is complex, and I think that maybe you’ve never really had good experiences with it. If you’d let me, I could show you just how beautiful it can be.” You offer, a small smile on your lips.

“If you feel the need-”

“I do. I love you, and I want you to know love.” You kissed his forehead. Dabi eventually pulled out, not minding the mess, he’d clean up later. 

“I want you to know why I love you.” You whispered, hugging him closer to you.

“Why I love your scars, your hands, your strength, the rasp in your voice, all of it. I love.” Dabi’s arms are strung over your waist as he lays, face nuzzled in your neck. It’s a bit of a stretch for him, and he feels out of place, but it’s oddly comfortable.

The next couple of times you draw Dabi, you ask to see him shirtless again. And with every new sketch, there’s something new to be learned, for Dabi. He’s learning about love, and loving you. 

He finds that you still draw him incredibly cute, and though he won’t admit it, he loves when you draw him. He’ll pose for you if you ever ask, and you always tease him a little about how it was like he was born to be a model.

It’s a long road ahead of you, but it’s one you’re willing to take, to show Dabi just how important love is.

»»————-　★　————-««

masterlist

#dabi #dabi x reader #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #mha #bnha #my hero academia x reader #boku no hero academia x reader #mha x reader #bnha x reader #touya todoroki #touya todoroki x reader #touya #touya x reader

[ceiling-painted-white]

OOO ANOTHER ONE sal x reader fluff or hurt/comfort it doesn't matter just any type of fluff

i live for some fluff ahhh. i went with hurt/comfort on this one bc it seemed fun! also, i believe you were 🐱 anon in another ask? pls correct me if im wrong!  e3

important note before reading: i didn’t know what specifically to make the “hurt” be, so i went with two lists. one for a physical injury and one for a mental/emotional kind of hurting. i didn’t specify what the injury was in either one of the lists, so any situation works for this!!

CONTENT WARNING : unspecified physical and emotion pain/distress/injury. please read with caution :)

hurt/comfort with sal, both physical and mental pain -

gn!reader

physical injury 

✧if you were at school and you went to the nurse and were gonna go home during school,

✧ he would be the one to bring you your stuff :)

✧ idk thats just kinda sweet to me

✧ if you got hurt in front of him/with him around he would rush to get over to you

✧ like pls my boy would spRINT

✧ (she’s a runner she’s a trackstar)

✧ if it’s a smaller injury, he gets u an ice pack and brings you over to sit down 

✧ lisa (larry’s mom) definitely has a first aid kit so you bet he’s running downstairs to get it (i cant do this today im soft-)

✧ he bandages any cuts you have so gently (im gonna cry)

✧ YOU CANT TELL ME HE WOULDN’T WANNA LIKE 

✧ KISS THE BANDAGES AFTER HE PUTS THEM ON

✧ “KISS IT BETTER” TYPE BEAT 

✧ makes sure you take your medicine if you need to take any 

✧ gets things for you so you dont have to move too much 

✧ you can pry this entire hc from my cold dead hands fr 

✧ now lets talk about if the injury was severe enough for like hospitalization

✧ he’d visit you everyday 🥺 

✧ gets you balloons probably 

✧ and maybe flowers 

✧ updates you on what’s going on with your friends and school and such 

✧ cares for you sm istg 

mental illness/pain 

✧ he understands mental illnesses and trauma a lot

✧ he’s experienced a lot of his own unfortunately. 

✧ is always there if you need to talk or vent, he tries to give good advice

✧ or if you just wanna rant to him without him responding, just listening

✧ he’s good with that too :) 

✧ hugs 

✧ like a shit ton of hugs 

✧ he affirms and compliments the hell out of you 

✧ feel free to cry in front of him, he’s totally cool with it

✧ (might cry with u if you dont mind-)

✧ i feel like his love languages are between words of affirmation and physical touch

✧ if you’re not feeling up for it, he would definitely clean your room for you if you asked

✧ since sometimes having a really dirty room can damage your mental heath even more

✧ but you cant clean it bc of said damaged mental health

✧ he’d bring you food if you’re having trouble eating

✧ and would def remind you to drink water

✧ encourages your self care :)

✧ i feel like he would be the type to like

✧ wash his face with you as way to 

✧ encourage/support(??) you within that aspect of self care (pls i hope that makes sense)

✧ or something like that idk

✧ plans lil things to do (like dates almost) to get you out of bed more 

✧ you’ve helped him a lot, and he wants to return the favor :)

#sally face x reader #sal fisher x reader #sal fisher x y/n #sally face hc #sally face x y/n

[colourful-void]

Supporting Satoshi - an examination and comparison of JN36 and XY121

Part One: Snowballs do not cure depression but it was worth a shot

You know that episode of Pokemon where a gym leader beats Satoshi in a battle so hard that one of his pokemon gets mildly hurt (though there's no long term effects) and because of it he becomes depressed, closing himself off from his friends before someone comes along to pull him out of that mental state, and also severe weather phenomena is involved and a reflection of a persons mental state? Or rather, the two episodes?

So when I was watching Journeys, I noticed an episode that had a similar-- but distinctly different-- plot to an xy episode I had seen before. And what was particularly interesting was that while I couldn't stand the xy episode, the journeys episode was one of my favourites. I won't drag this out for you guys, I love the journeys episode and re watch it a LOT and the xy episode sort of just leaves me with a sour taste in my mouth. and don't go claiming its solely ship bias, because i saw the xy episode first and disliked it then.

This will analyze both of these episodes, comparing them against each other. Specifically within the context of how Goh and Serena both help Satoshi through a similar situation There will be some discussion of AmourShipping and Satogou in this analysis. I'm going to be a bit negative regarding Serena's actions and the potential "romantic" weight of them here, but I want to be clear that I Do Not dislike Serena as a character. Personally, I wish the writers had given her more room to grow outside of her romantic interests, but I do not hate Serena as a character. I do, however, disagree with her actions in this episode. Please don't take this out of context and dont be ship fighting in the comments, it's boring. This is a comparison of These Two Episodes, not of Goh and Serena and their respective ships as a whole.

This part mainly focuses on the xy episode and the second will focus mainly on the journeys. It's only divided into parts because of the tumblr post limit.

(If you like the xy episode or hate the journeys episode, awesome! having your own opinions is great. these are mine though, so i hope you'll listen to them)

With that out of the way, let's start. And I'm going to use mostly japanese names here because I'm taking screencaps from the subbed japanese copies.

The set up for each of these episodes is eerily similar as pointed out in the gag at the start.

Xy has a bit more set up before the episode in question though, with the initial loss and retreat into the forest by Satoshi taking place the episode before. The episode opens up proper with Satoshi taking time to breathe to himself, alone in the forest.

Emphasis is placed on him taking a deep breath, aided by the visuals showing them (thanks cold air) and the silence of the rest of the soundscape, with the only other sounds being the wind and some bird pokemon, plus some falling snow.

Journeys Satoshi starts off in a better mental state than Xy, with the episode starting off with him jogging along with his pokemon.

However, we can still see that he's been affected by the last battle he lost, against Saitou, as he's putting a lot of effort into training and doing better.

Which, doesn't go well for him, as he loses his next two battles as well, and drops in the World Championship ranking as a result

And he's pretty upset about it too. Same thing as over in xy. In both cases, a respective friend/love interest notes that Satoshi is upset and expresses concern.

He's got support from his friends in both situations! But that support comes across in very different ways.

But, to understand how that support manages to affect Satoshi, we need to understand the problem at play.

Now, I wanna make something clear here. Satoshi's problem is not that he is a sore loser. I'm not arguing that's not a contributing factor, or that he's not upset about the loss (particularly in the world championships), He's still bitter about the lost part, but the root of the problem is not losing, he's been shown to be fine with losing (if not a bit more motivated to win now) in prior episodes.

Satoshi's problem is that his pokemon are getting hurt. Satoshi's problem is that his pokemon are getting hurt, because they're losing battles. Satoshi's problem is that his pokemon are losing battles because he's not training them well enough. And to clarify, that's not my viewpoint, it's his. Satoshi's problem is that he's not good enough for himself, and he feels that that's something he has to fix on his own.

So how do we help him?

Our weather event in question is introduced in separate points in the episodes, but I'll cover them both now.

In xy, it's this snowstorm, which conveniently becomes a problem directly after Serena returns to the Pokemon Centre.

In journeys, it's a sandstorm! That's in near direct contrast to a snowstorm! Incredible.

Heading back to xy Satoshi, things aren't going great in the forest. Luckily, Serena's run off to find him.

I think it's of note here that Serena runs off with the best intentions, she wants to help Satoshi, plain and simple. It just sort of goes wrong along the way.

It's worth noting that Xy Satoshi tries to bring himself out of being sad by the tried and true method of "stop being sad"

Despite telling himself this, he doesn't get anywhere. Which makes sense, because it's not getting the the root of the problem. It's not even addressing it at all. He's just trying to 'be better', which isn't even a battle strategy. However, it is something I can see him saying, so this isn't a critique of Satoshi's thought process, but me pointing out that this isn't really effective. Which is supported by the narrative, because again, he doesn't get anywhere, he doesn't even move.

I can't show it in screencaps but the lights in Satoshi's eyes are shaking here, something that they consistently do throughout the series when he's feeling a particularly strong emotion. Keep that in mind. It couples well with another trait of his, and that's his hat!

And by that I mean how he hides his eyes with the brim of it when upset, something he does exactly as Serena shows up and calls out to him. Now, he's not upset that Serena is here. He's upset about the pokemon stuff still. He's trying to hide the fact that he's upset from Serena.

Serena starts off with her speech well, trying to appeal to Satoshi to let her in and talk things out. And maybe it's because he wasn't ready for it yet, or because of the way she phrases it (a lot of 'i' and 'me' language which can be helpful but can also come across as though she's making it about her. not her intent i don't think, but a possible interpretation.), it's not her fault for how Satoshi reacts regardless.

But how Satoshi reacts is not good.

Now it's really interesting to note that before this, Serena was standing while Satoshi was sitting, putting her above him in terms of active power, when it comes to how the shot is presented, but when Satoshi stands up, the camera tilts with the movement so that they're on equal level. Neat!

And Serena yells in return, scolding Satoshi for not talking about it. Not the best move, since pushing someone to talk about something that's upsetting them isn't really productive, but she's trying here and she's frustrated.

Satoshi continues to withdraw and self isolate, claiming it is his problem and that he wants to be left be. Now, this is the mindset of a clearly upset person and isolation may not be the best option, but he did make the explicit request to be left alone here.

He's clearly upset as he turns away from Serena's eye and slumps over a little.

And then Serena throws a snowball at him.

Angry as he is, you can see Satoshi's expression change when he sees Serena's reaction.

Serena tells Satoshi that she's not like the Satoshi she knows, who is always full of energy and positive and a leader, and a bunch of other positive traits. The problem here, is that Serena's looking at an idealized version of Satoshi. And while the intent here was probably meant to be something more like "you have so many wonderful traits about you I know you can do this", coupled with the snowballs and the phrasing, it seems as though Serena is scolding Satoshi for being sad.

Or rather, being angry with him for not living up to her idealized version of him, and not wanting him to express any negitave emotions.

Which is sort of a really bad mindset.

The snowballs continue, never once does Satoshi fight back. In fact, he stops arguing entirely after the first one. Serena knocks him off his feet and tells him he's not being himself, before running off. (In the english dub, Serena claims that Satoshi isn't being "the real satoshi" and then demands that the real Satoshi be "given back", so it could be worse)

Satoshi decides to literally run his problems away, because it will help him reach some kind of conclusion, and immediately trips and falls down a large hill. No, I'm not making that up. Something like this just isn't like him. He's just gotta stop being sad!

Now personally, I really disagree with the idea that "being upset" isn't "like a person". That's because based off of my own experiences, I know it can be really damaging to hold the mindset that any negative emotions you feel aren't a part of you and that you shouldn't be upset because you're usually a positive and happy person. Not the case with every person, but I personally really have a problem with shows telling children that they just shouldn't be upset instead of processing their emotions in a meaningful way. (The journeys episode doesn't do an outstanding job of it either, but this is a bit of a tangent anyway. A show that does do this right is "OK KO! Let's be Heroes" which actually deals with this problem in greater depth and does a fantastic job of it.)

But the snowball scene ends here. Now I'll get back to Journeys in a moment, but since Serena has finished her part of the comparison for the most part, I'm going to summarize a bit more of the xy episode.

Satoshi decides to literally run his problems away, because it will help him reach some kind of conclusion, and immediately trips and falls down a large hill. No, I'm not making that up.

The snowstorm kicks in, Serena get back annoyed, then similarly groans and yells, and the whole xy gang + pokemon go running off in search of Satoshi. Pikachu appears the most concerned.

Now Serena tells the others she lost her cool and said something horrible to Satoshi, but explains its because Satoshi is someone she admires. Cool motive, I get it, still kinda bad.

and in the end, it's not Serena's words that get he message across to Satoshi. The solution to this problem was Satoshi finding a way to reaffirm his abilities and instinct.

In the xy episode, he helps some pokemon out of the tree, and when his very cool frog friend shows up, they're able to work together with their bond to save this one from falling off a cliff.

Here's the point. Satoshi learns by doing, by actions. He needs to see first hand that there are ways of getting past his problems, and that it's worth having the courage to keep going. The lesson is about valuing pokemon as equals and partners, and specifically that trying to be better as the trainer alone isn't going to help.

This is essentially where this plot line ends, team rocket is there for a bit as well but as much as i love them they're not relevant here, and some fun stuff with the league, love it not important right now its like 3am and I'm not sleeping until this is finished so we gotta keep things moving.

This was no doubt Serena's intent to get a similar point, but she goes about it the wrong way. She tries to convey this with words, as conversation and motivational words have helped her in the past (Elle's words of praise stick with her, Satoshi's words from when they were kids, etc). It's a good idea, but their different ways of learning and growing from a similar situation are incompatible, and that's why things don't work out in Serena's favour. There's also still the problem of "pulling yourself together" not being helpful in this case.

There's also a very similar line in this scene to the one at the end of the journeys episode, as Satoshi says to his frog that they should start over from scratch. It's essentially the same phrase with different wording. It's great. The Storm ends as he realizes this as well! Wonderful in terms of pathetic fallacy.

The gang all reunites, its nice. Satoshi thanks Serena for what she said after apologizing to everyone, which contradicts what he said earlier but I've already established that I dislike this message here so I won't go over it too much. I guess he's right in a literal sense in that in response to her words he went and ran until he tripped off a cliff but the emotional growth here was because of his own actions (and the frogs), not Serena's. Sorry Serena, you'll get em next time.

This is essentially where this plot line ends, team rocket is there for a bit as well but as much as i love them they're not relevant here, and some fun stuff with the league, love it not important right now its like 3am as I write this so we gotta keep things moving.

So. What about Goh?

Well...

(Part Two here on account of image limit!!)

#pokemon #anipoke #pokeani #pokemon analysis #pokemon xy #pokemon xyz #trainer ash #trainer serena #trainer goh #i dont wanna use the amourshipping tag to put negtivity in it that seems mean #analysis #this was written in the 2-3am area but the next part was written 12 hours later so thats a neat fact #long post

[autisticlenaluthor]

hi hello goodmorning!!

i’ve been wondering something (genuine curiosity rory your majesty your answers can’t disappoint me)

have you ever watched atypical and if so, what are your thoughts on how they handled representation (both regarding neurodivergence and queerness)?

i have watched it and omg i have thoughts

in my opinion atypical is one of the better shows when it comes to autism representation. i like that sam has a realistic special interest and it’s something specific rather then the stereotypical trains or math.

i also like that it doesn’t showcase meltdowns for the sake of shock value and that because it shows sams thought process, a lot of the cognitive/emotional elements of autism are shown like echolalia (getting a word stuck in your head) or trying to figure out the thoughts of those around you. i also like that he does have a close friend and that he values relationships with those around him. i feel like a lot of times autistic people are written to be heartless and completely anti social so it was refreshing to see him and zahid together (tbh zahid is my favorite character)

other then that tho there’s a lot of stuff i really hate about the show. and this is just my opinion but yeah

the big thing is that how sam does SO many harmful and selfish things that are played off as him being autistic. sam is 17 or 18 yrs old in season 1, he’s an adult. when he locks paige in his closet or yanks that girls ponytail at casey’s track meet, he gets off without any consequences. the reasoning is he was overstimulated, he can’t control it, etc. but being overstimulated isn’t an excuse to do physically harmful things like that and i feel like the show pushes the narrative that autistic people can’t control themselves in that headspace.

the reality is that maybe some can’t in that moment, but they should still be told that that behavior is wrong and given the resources to handle overstimulation in another way. autistic people aren’t babies and pushing the narrative that we won’t understand when we’re doing something wrong is very harmful.

i wouldve much rather seen sam learn coping skills or something like that rather then just taking out his stress on other people. he does it over and over again and it’s really annoying.

another thing that irks me is that Sam is written to be very selfish- he never thinks about how his actions will impact others and he always puts himself as the center of attention, even when the situation isn’t about him. ex- making casey’s birthday all about himself because he was afraid of losing edison or ignoring zahid when he found out about his tumor. i definitely understand why he did those things and i don’t think it came from malicious intent but again, i think it would’ve been way more meaningful to show him learning actual coping skills so that he isn’t taking away from the people around him.

i dislike the narrative that ‘it’s so hard to be a parent/friend/sibling to an autistic person’ and i think this show pushes it a lot. especially with casey- her experience with an autistic brother didnt have to be hard, her mom forced her into a caretaker role while never ever pushing sam out of his comfort zone. casey is like the definition of a parentified child of an emotionally immature adult.

something i feel very strongly about is that white autistic boys who are never told ‘no’ by their parents and have all their harmful, even dangerous behaviors brushed aside by their diagnosis, turn into entitled and dangerous men. specifically- white autistic buys who are never taught boundaries or consent or coping skills so that their wants and needs dont become damaging to the people around them. i feel like sam is kind of an example of that. it isn’t until he does something extreme that he actually has to face consequences for his actions.

in that sense, i see a lot of accuracy, though, i don’t think it was the shows intent. to me, sam represents all the autistic boys who were never told no as kids. i also don’t like the way the show includes the puzzle piece symbol or constantly pushes for the use of person first language.

but yeah i feel like there are a lot of really great elements, like i find a lot of sams character to be very relatable. there are a lot of elements that they got right with him but i don’t think that it should be the show that people use to learn about autism or whatever. sam is also played by a neurotypical actor which is sketchy to me lmao

in terms of queerness i would die for casey, i love her so much. izzie is kinda problematic lmao but i still love her and casey together and i love the development that they had together

#atypical #no hate to anyone who likes the show or anything bc i enjoyed watching it and think it’s overall a good show #the representation of autism in it just isn’t great

[sheepprophet]

/rp obv and /lh for the most part!

My thinking out loud for who Ranboo could trust with the enderwalk state, in no particular order:

A. Tommy. Probably one of the most obvious choices imo. He's proven to Ranboo specifically that he can be trusted to protect him in a similar situation (the trial about George's house being griefed where Tommy took the fall for him). I think Ranboo knows that Tommy can keep a secret. And Tommy isnt really on any sides at the moment - apart from his friendship with Tubbo which would probably his one loose end that could end up being a deal breaker for Ranboo. I legit think Tommy is objectively the best choice for this job (and i wanna see akward duo reunite as much as the next guy), but we gotta keep in mind who we're dealing with. Ranboo's likely not going to be think of Tommy as someone who's divorced himself from basically all conflict and is just trying to better himself. He's so paranoid about this exact issue, he's probably going to default to thinking Tommy is essentially just between sides right now. Plus, like I said, Ranboo didn't say he needs someone who "isnt on any side", he said he needs someone who's "detached". While Tommy definitely fills the former, he definitly doesn't fill the latter.

B. A lot of chat was suggesting Techno and/or Phil? Which?? My dudes??? No???? Yeah sure they probably wouldn't care, but Ranboo has made it pretty clear that he's really cautious about telling them things like this in fear that one day, they might care. Plus, when they say they don't care, they really mean it. To be honest, I dont think c!Techno or c!Phil are good people to be that vulnerable to? Mainly because this is something that Ranboo is going to need unprompted reassurance with and I dont really think either of them would think to do that? Plus, they're very much on a side, that being their own. When Ranboo says detached, I think he means really detached (or at least as much as humanly possible on this SMP).

C. Fundy. This one is odd because I could totally see it happening, but I can just as easily see it not. Ranboo and Fundy established a pretty strong bond throughout December, but after Doomsday it completely fell through for them both. They clearly still care about each other and that bond is definitely still there, but its been damaged and they've both been afraid to be the first to make an effort to mend it. I genuinely believe if they would just talk, they'd be back to normal in like 10 minutes. But they'd need to talk first and in this case I think Ranboo would be the one to start the conversation, which he's shown discomfort in doing before. However, if they could bridge this gap, l think Fundy would be a very good choice (as long as he could take it seriously). Obviously, Ranboo can trust Fundy on an emotional level and we know Fundy can keep a secret (almost too well) because of the whole A Spy's Diary situation. Fundy also said himself that he currently has no alliances on the smp, aside from probably Ranboo and Ranboo knows this. Additionally, Fundy is one of the only people, along with Puffy, and of course Dream, who have canonically seen him in his enderwalk state. (Tommy did notice him wandering around like he was in it once, but Ranboo hasn't acknowledged that time as canon, so idk). Anyway, I think Fundy would be a pretty solid choice if they can just get their shit together and finally make up.

D. Karl? I see where y'all are coming from with this one and listen, I would also love to see these to interact and bond over their respective memory issues, bookkeeping, and disrealization problems. But, I hate to break it to you that c!Ranboo literally has no clue about any of that. No one does. Karl hasn't told anybody about his ability to time travel and atm doesnt have any plans to. Granted, Ranboo could choose him for other reasons, but I highly doubt it, honestly?

E. Wilbur? I know what i just said, but Hear Me Out. He's not revived right now and we don't know when he will be or what he'll even be like when/if he is. But, a few things we can guarantee is that when/if he is he'll be one of the most detached people on the server (both politically and probably emotionally), he'd have no qualms with helping out Ranboo even if he does turn out to be some awful war criminal, and, based on his interactions with Ghostbur, I think Ranboo might be willing to trust him. And probably my biggest argument for why i like this crack theory: If Wilbur remembers all of the shit he did, that means he'll be one of the few people who would be able to relate to Ranboo. He knows what it's like to have Dream take advantage of your poor/deteriorating mental health and talk you into commiting acts of terrorism. Wilbur also would know what it's like to feel like you can't trust anyone, including yourself, and he could relate to Ranboo's disrealization he's been experiencing. Plus, I just think getting to see these two interact like this would be neat idk. Definitely not going to happen, but I thought I'd inculde the idea here!

F. Eret. Fuck dude, I really want Ranboo to go to Eret about this. Like first of all, Eret is functionally detached from everything right now (I mean that's why Dream has put them on the throne twice now). All Eret cares about is helping those who need it, which would include Ranboo. I also think Ranboo knows he can trust Eret and we all know Eret would be such a sweetheart about comforting the kid, while also understanding the seriousness of the situation and treating it as such. Something that I also thought was interesting was Ranboo emphasizing that it would be ideal if the person has "kept a secret before". Now, Fundy has also kept a big secret before (again, A Spy's Diary), but ya know who was the one other person who knew about Fundy's spy plan and kept the secret (which was someone else's) just as well? Eret. And of course, the reason Eret was the first person who came to mind for me: Eret betrayed L'manberg all that time ago and, obviously, had to keep it a secret and did with ease, even at a time when the writing couldn't protect it for them. Point is, Eret checks this box multiple times over and gets a gold star on it. On the note of Eret's betrayal, what I said about Wilbur knowing what it's like to be used by Dream to commit terrorism/war crimes, also applies to Eret. It's often forgotten that Eret was actually the first person to be used and manipulated by Dream. Eret wanted respect and power and when Dream found out, he promised it to them in the form of a flimsy title and fancy crown in exchange for turning on their friends, Eret took it. They then regretted it almost instantly. Point is, Eret can not only help Ranboo through this with the care and respect he requires, but can also do so by being able to relate to Ranboo on a personal level, which I think Ranboo would respond to. Eret is sort of the closest Ranboo could have to having someone represent what he's afraid he could become - someone who's seen as a filthy traitor and nothing more, never able to earn back the love and respect of their friends. But, Eret could show him that, with time and a lot of effort, he's worthy of forgivess just like they were. I also really want this for Eret. Let Eret be able to use the experience that they view as their biggest mistake, followed by months of paying for it, as a way to be able to help this kid that's grappling with some pretty heavy problems. It would be so healing for the both of them.

#dream smp #dsmp #dream smp analysis #dream smp theory #sorta #im more spitballing here lol #ranboo #tommyinnit #wilbur soot #fundy #itsfundy #fundylive #fundy why are you like this just pick some branding #eret #i just noticed this tag ive apparently used before that feels relevant: #hot take: eret was the first person to fall victim to dreams manipulation and has been paying for it ever since #im so big brain /j

[soup-du-silence]

If you are comfortable with it, I'd love to hear your critiques of the finale, ESPECIALLY with how they handled Webby and Lena's final interactions with each other. I'm seeing you talk about it a bit on twitter, and I'm vigorously nodding my head to much of what you and others are criticizing the finale for. Obviously, if you'd rather just ignore this whole fiasco, I completely understand, and I look forward to the stories you continue to make about Webby and Lena!

god. okay.

ducktales spoilers below

SPECIFICALLY the weird webby and lena moments -- Lena calling team magic sisters and Webby snapping at Lena for her strong reaction to getting her string on the board cut -- mean absolutely nothing to me. i simply reject them. i dont know where they came from. Lena and Webby havent called each other sisters since their first episode together. It feels...unlike Webby to snub a Lena apology like that.  

And then they didnt really....interact again much, after that, right? unless im forgetting. there was a lot to be mad about.

and I guess, like. Here’s the thing. aside from some really powerful moments in season 2, the romantic subtext surrounding webby and lena was EXTREMELY dialed back. we had Lena’s hyper-powered jealous freak out in friendship hates magic and...what Ive always counted as an indirect kiss in nightmare on killmotor hill, but there were no more leslie-knopisms. Far less of Webby waxing poetic about lena’s virtues. Adding Violet meant less shared capital-L Looks or hugs or hand holds. So By the time season 2 wrapped up and a lot of that stuff wasnt as apparent, and they never bothered mentioning Lena ONCE before she came back, it became kind of clear that this was not a thing that was happening any more.

Then we got Penny’s “outing” which was not at all an outing. And seeing that penny not wanting to date earth men was a “compromise” that needed to be “fought for” really nailed that coffin shut for me. If we couldn’t get an openly wlw totally original tertiary character, we weren’t going to get it from Webby.

I dont know if they got unhappy executive notes about season 1 or if there was someone around championing the relationship early in production who left to work on other things, or if they just decided it wasnt important, but any hope held out for it after late season 2 was just me being delusional. I wanted to believe, I really did.

maybe I was delusional all along. Had my shipping goggles on. I dont know. I mean, it happens. it wouldnt be the first time and it wont be the last. 

I just really, REALLY wanted it, you know?

we couldnt have gotten like...one last ...something? Something just for them, to harken back to the energy they had in season 1?

sigh.

i havent written in a long time because i dont really have any stories left to tell, but I do brainstorm many projects with PCS. while I, and especially he, have often taken canon reveals in stride (when he first started writing Longest Shadows, we did not yet know about Violet. He was able to add her in fairly seamlessly, i think) I dont think we’ll be paying attention to any of this, ESPECIALLY some shit about Webby being Scrooge’s clone. (dumb dumb stupid dumb) I mean, you can ask him about it, but I know we’ve already shared some choice words, lol. Even if I operate under the assumption that the clone thing is and has been true all along, I’ll simply be working in a universe where it never came to light.

i can’t believe we would take this story about found family and make it about genetics in the 11th hour. what the holy fucking fuck is this nonsense. ugh.

I dont want to say I cant believe i wasted the last 5 years of my life on ducktales, because I didnt. It meant a lot to me. I had a lot of fun, i met some really awesome people, and in particular one person I can count among my very best friends in the whole world. so it wasnt a waste. And im not going to go on one of these weird tirades against frank where I try to hold him accountable for my emotional damages or whatever because Im an adult and not delusional. Thats the story he wanted to tell, for some reason I will never understand. We’re going to keep writing and daydreaming our own. And maybe, if Im lucky, I’ll live long enough to see the next reboot headed by some queer kid who grew up seeing themself in little baby gay webby vanderquack and makes it canon. N...not that we need another reboot. But i would watch that one. Just saying.

#ducktales #ducktales spoilers #weblena #Anonymous

[sunriseseance]

please,,, even if you dont answer this publicly i wanna know your In Depth Thoughts on fanon klaus and the issues w him bc i also have issues w fanon klaus but i cant put it in words

This got SO LONG, so I hope you meant it when you said you wanted in depth! Holy shit I sorta lost my mind on this.

In my early days as a bear-poker in this fandom, I described fanon!Klaus as that person who gets resurrected in a horror movie and comes back different. As an audience member, I can tell he's wrong, but nobody interacting with him directly seems to know this. I've also talked a little bit about Klaus and intelligence before, which plays into any discussion about fanon!Klaus, but I'll be more specific here. Before I get started, I wanna say that fandom is a fun space and I don't think anyone is *bad* for creating/enjoying fanon!Klaus, especially not for the third reason I lay out. I just think he's awful, and has some harmful roots that I doubt the people writing him even know about on a conscious level.

Okay, let's get into this. Because I'm me and Wittgenstein's early work that he later disagreed with has changed my entire way of interacting with the world, I'm gonna define my terms. Let's talk about what fanon!Klaus is LIKE before we talk about why I REALLY DON'T LIKE HIM. Fanon!Klaus is a happy, stupid, sweet, childish, bubbly, luminous free spirit. He wears bubblegum pink skirts and he cries when Diego eats his cookies. He doesn't know what numbers are, he can't count, he can't walk and chew gum, he thinks that Africa is a country, he forgets that homophobia exists, he doesn't know that drugs are bad for him, the list goes on (These are all real examples. Can you tell what part of fanon annoys me the most?). He cries at the drop of a hat, and doesn't understand his place in the family. He'd move heaven and earth to help the people around him, and he'd never be mean to anyone but Luther (and even then just barely) He constantly needs attention, supervision, etc. He makes jokes about modern memes and listens exclusively to pop music. He's really damaged but it's only because nobody Took Care Of Him and he needs someone to Rescue Him.

Canon Klaus is mean, and quick, and sharp, and miserable, and hiding, and funny because you're laughing WITH him, and an old soul, and a goth, and chronically apathetic, and selfish, and so fucking smart, and acutely aware of just how much he matters to other people. He makes rape jokes, he figures out how to get info on the eye while high out of his mind, he speaks like 10 languages, he listens to Nina Simone, he uses people's inherent fear of the dead to buy himself time, he finds the perfect story within the dead to cause a rift, he tells Luther TO HIS FACE that he doesn't care if the world ends. Klaus is a fascinating study in queer trauma, and robbing him of these traits is a complete disservice to yourself AND the character.

I say this often about fanon!Klaus, but WHO IS THIS??? Like…. Okay, if I gave you this list and you didn't know it was about Klaus, would you think it was? I think he's literally unrecognizable. He's not any of the things I know or love about Klaus. He's nobody to me, except a nuisance wearing the same skin suit and clogging the tags. He is also, weirdly, the most popular character in the entire fandom. I wanna think about why, and I have 3 theories that I think can all be true separately or simultaneously instance to instance.

First, fanon!Klaus exists because of internalized homophobia, classism, and anti-addict rhetoric. I think that on some level people don't believe addicts, feminine queer men, or homeless people are capable of intelligence. I think people see Klaus's canonical positive traits and they sort of throw them out the window because they don't make sense with their world view. A queer addict is a helpless tragedy, and he's someone that needs rescuing by Kind Strong Dave. A queer addict can't be smart, because then he wouldn't be an addict. A queer addict can't be wily, or interesting, because then he wouldn't be an addict. Fandom sees a feminine queer mlm and knows he should be in a sparkly bubblegum pink skirt, and saying "dahling" or "wig" or whatever else all the time. They know he should be bashful and submissive and always falling into the arms of Kind Strong Dave who protects him from Evil. They also know he should really, really like Britney Spears, and not give a shit about Nina Simone.

Second, fanon!Klaus exists because people want to excuse negative behavior in their favorite characters. Klaus is selfish and mean and apathetic. He just is. These are flaws that haunt him, and define a lot of his interactions. These are, also, pretty tough flaws to excuse (which… Hey…. I have a solution for that). I think that fanon Klaus, who just doesn't GET that he's being mean, and is too stupid not to become an addict (I don't think addiction is a flaw, but I do think that addiction plays into this), and is too out of touch and childish to understand that he shouldn't just fucking leave, comes from a place of wanting Klaus to be a good person who does good things. I'm sorry, but he isn't. Not always. I think the impulse to make him constantly sweet and constantly stupid comes from wanting Klaus's actions to be fundamentally excusable. He can't help it! He's just too much of a useless twink to know that it's bad to lie! (also, side note, fanon!Ben comes from this side of fanon!Klaus. In canon, Klaus is self destructing on purpose and Ben's presence helps…. Maybe, possibly, twice. In fanon, Klaus is just stupid and he needs a babysitter and that is Ben, the motiveless, endlessly loving but Exhausted braincell holder. This is fucked up on many levels. Ben is an asshole, and we all need to get used to that idea quick).

The third and final reason is that fanon!Klaus is… More fun, in the traditional sense of the word. Fanon!Klaus seems like he comes from a very emotional romcom or sitcom or something. He's like a barbie. He's fun to play dress-up with. He's fun to make incorrect quotes about. He's fun to write about, especially when it's about his siblings herding him or coddling him. Good ol' useless, loveable Klaus. I think this is partially because Klaus is a pretty fucking heavy character. He's a traumatized homeless queer drug addict, and that's sort of hard to make jokey fandom content about. Not impossible, I don't think, but not easy. This isn't to say that angsty fandom content isn't guilty of fanon!Klaus, though. It absolutely is. Often when Klaus willingly shares his feelings, or cries in front of someone, or asks for help for something more intense than tying him to a chair, it's fanon!Klaus. Hell, any time he GETS rescued it's teetering into that territory. He's still completely devoid of all of the grit and intrigue of canon, but he's fun to write about, and fun to project onto, and fun to rescue. He's also EASIER to write. People know that Klaus is a funny character, they know they laugh when he's on screen, but it is WAY harder to write a character you're laughing with than it is to write a character you're laughing at. It's WAY easier to write a character who moves your angst plot on by asking for help, or necessitating rescuing, than it is to work out how these things would happen without initiation. I get it, and in spite of the length of this, I don't think it's the end of the world.

I guess as I close this out, I would remind everyone that Klaus is smart, and mean, and over 30 years old. He's not a babe in the woods, or a damsel in distress, or a useless silly junkie twink. I promise that the real Klaus is worth the time and effort it takes to engage with him.

#the umbrella academy #klaus hargreeves #Answered #Um #Fandom criticism #Rape cw