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athenasgotu · 27 days
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I LOVE THIS SM!!
dare to fuck this up
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summary: ever since your last game of truth or dare ellie's been avoiding you and it's time for an intervention
tags: NSFW, tlou au, college!ellie/reader, mentions of drugs and alcohol (not used), oral (e receiving), fingering (r receiving), finger riding (r receiving), little bit of angst, afab reader, the knee thing
a/n: this took me 2 months cause i work full time and it's 10k words so. enjoy (thank u for all the love on part 1! <3) also for anyone who doesn't know the tiktok dance i mentioned i linked it. don't look under the sound you'll spend way too long watching hot women dance
part 1
You hadn't talked about it. 
You had woken up the next morning, the sun blinding you from the window that was still left open. A cold autumn breeze ruffled your curtains, pricking at your bare skin. With one foot still in a dream, you'd groaned, turning over and pulling your blanket over your head. You had burrowed your head into your pillow - it still smelled earthy, rich with cologne and the faintest smell of weed. It had made your nose wrinkle only briefly, before you had reached out, searching for the warmth of another body - but your fingers only landed on the sheets, now cool to the touch. 
You sat up with a gasp, the blanket pooling around your lap. But you had fallen asleep on top of your blankets, hadn't you? 
The comforter was laid neatly over you, the pillows on the other side of the bed propped against your headboard, unbothered. The sun was streaming through the window, filtering through your curtains and shining in splatters of light against your own bare skin. Your small room was deafeningly quiet. 
That had been three weeks ago. 
For three weeks, Ellie avoided you. You hadn't seen her when you left to take your exam that morning. By the time you got home - after classes and after your part-time job - it was dark. The door to her bedroom was firmly shut, the muffled sound of music leaking into the living room - you wanted to smile when you realized she was listening to that song you had recommended. You thought about knocking on her door; not even to talk about what happened, really, but just because she was your best friend. Instead, you ate leftover takeout - cold because you were too tired to microwave it - and went to bed. You could hear her quietly singing to the music through your flimsy wall, falling asleep listening to her voice. 
At first, you honestly thought you had dreamed it. You thought maybe you had fallen asleep, sleep deprivation and vodka drawing out this fantasy in your dreams to torment you when you woke. But when you looked in the mirror, the bruises were still there. You ran your fingertips across the one on your collarbone, pressing at the one left behind your ear; you could still feel the warmth of Ellie's mouth against your skin, her teeth grazing across your hips. The phantom feeling still sent a shiver down your spine, heat creeping in your stomach. 
Ellie was trying her best to avoid you, but she still lived with you. After three days of not speaking, you resorted to a different approach. She didn't seem to have any plan to speak with you anytime soon - certainly not about what happened - so you let your body do the talking. You began wearing primarily v-necks and tank tops - ignoring the fact that it was still fall - simply to broadcast the line of lovebites she had left, her signature written all over your skin. They had faded slightly, but the purplish bruises still blossomed along your collar. You began wearing shorts around, short enough to show the bruise on your thigh; you let the fabric sit low enough to show the one at your hip, a pretty blend of colors that made you ache. The few times you did see her - when she was scavenging for food in the kitchen or right when she got home, before she could scurry away back to her room - you could feel her eyes lingering on you, gaze like a brand against your skin, burning all the spots she had marked. 
And she would hurry back to her room, locking the door behind her. 
Fine. 
If she refused to talk about it, you thought, you'd just have to make her. 
Which is why, three weeks after your original game - three weeks after that stupid fucking night - you bought a new bottle of vodka (by the time you had found the old one, it had spilled the last of its contents into your rug. Your room still smelled of it). When you got home, Ellie’s door was shut, just as it had been every day for three weeks. You kicked off your boots, leaving them in a pile in the hall, and knocked on her door.
“Sorry, I’m busy,” she called - just as she had every day for three weeks. 
You pursed your lips and knocked again, harder. 
“I’m busy!” she called again, her voice hard. It might have stung if you didn’t know her so well.
So, you knocked again. And kept knocking, a steady, continuous rhythm that echoed against the walls. You heard Ellie curse under her breath, could hear the scrape of her chair and her footsteps, and you kept knocking. You didn’t stop - didn’t even slow - until she opened the door in a huff, your hand falling against open air. 
“What the hell are you-” 
You shoved the bottle of vodka against her chest, cutting her off. She gripped it hastily before it could shatter against the floor. 
She looked frazzled. You had seen her during several exam seasons, during harrowing projects and infuriating essays. You had seen her in the hospital, two years ago, after breaking her leg skateboarding to work. But there was something in the way her hair was disheveled, sticking up at odd angles as though she had been running her fingers through it over and over and over again. There were bags under her eyes, purplish splotches like watercolor. 
And her eyes…. Her eyes were completely shattered. 
So you hesitated - briefly, just long enough for her to see the stutter on your lips - before you said, “Truth or dare?”
And the game began. 
Ellie looked at you, staring for several moments that stretched into infinity. You wanted to grasp it, to wrap your fingers around that stretched thread of a moment and hold it there where it couldn't hurt either of you. You weren't ready to let it go. But Ellie was looking at you with those broken eyes, and before you could say or do anything - before you caved and took the bottle back, fleeing back to the safety of your own room - the thread snapped. 
Ellie shook her head - and kept shaking it, as if doing so would rid her of this… whatever this was. “No,” she murmured, avoiding your eyes as her grip around the bottle’s neck tightened. “No, I’m not doing this. I’m busy, okay? I have an exam tomorrow-”
She moved to close the door - shutting it right in your face - but you kicked your foot out to stop it. 
“When somebody asks the question,” you said, reciting the stupid little agreement you both had written out two years ago, the night you established this tradition, “you have to play the game to its conclusion; when you run out of questions or pass out from alcohol poisoning. Those are the rules, El. Remember?” 
And still, she just looked at you, her brow furrowed like you were an equation she couldn’t solve - couldn’t even read, really. Her knuckles were white around the bottle’s neck, and when you looked down, her hands were shaking. You wanted more than anything to put your hands over hers, to still them - to bring those hands to your lips and kiss the white knuckles until she released her fists. Instead, you dug your nails into your thighs. 
You watched as Ellie took a deep, steadying breath, clenching her fists tighter before releasing the tension, her fingers relaxing around the bottle; her hands stopped trembling. She smiled at you, but it was tight, her eyes empty of their usual mischief. “Alright,” she said, and her voice was just as tight as her fists had been moments ago - the tension not gone, only transferred. “Okay, I’ll play. But you only get an hour - I really do need to study.” 
Ellie’s bedroom was the same layout as yours, only flipped, the two a mirror of each other. Strings of lights hung crookedly along the walls, the bulbs casting a soft, warm glow amongst the room, the same hazy hue of a dream. An easel leaned in one corner, a canvas propped against it; there were only the barest scribbles of an outline, incomprehensible to you. You thought it may be a profile, the gentle slope of a nose and soft lips sketched in pencil, but you weren’t sure. 
You ran your fingers over her desk as you passed; it was in absolute disarray. Two different astronomy textbooks lay open, covered in highlighter markings and Ellie’s sloping writing in the margins. There were three different cups on the surface in varying levels of full: a mug half full of coffee, still steaming; a glass of water that was completely full, untouched; and a cup filled with murky, grey liquid. A few paintbrushes had been left to sit in that one, and in large writing along the cup was written PAINT DO NOT DRINK. You almost laughed, remembering all the times you had watched your roommate spit water out after she had picked up the wrong cup. 
It felt strange when you sat gingerly on her bed. You had sat in this spot so many times before, more than you could count. You had spent so much time lounging on this bed, your laptop open in front of you while Ellie worked at her desk - on homework or her latest painting or nothing at all. There were days laid out before you where you both at lain in a crumbled heap, eating takeout on top of the covers because Ellie didn't give a shit about crumbs, an open laptop playing whatever horror movie she wanted to show you (she was always more scared than you, hiding her face in your shoulder). God knows how many truth or dare games you had played in this room, a bottle of alcohol passing between shaking fingers. When Ellie bought it, it was cheap whiskey and you hated it; you drank it anyway. 
Now, sitting on her bed - carefully, as though you thought it might break - your skin felt aflame, a fire burning in your muscles. When you ran your fingers over the messy sheets, you could only remember how it had felt to have your fingers clutching the ones on your own bed. 
Ellie sat at her desk across from you, folding herself so that she had one foot propped up on the chair with her, her knee folded to her chest; her other foot tapped anxiously against the floor. She was looking at you, her face strategically neutral, but it was like she was looking through you; her eyes kept shifting away, unable or unwilling to settle on you. Her voice gave nothing away when she said, looking at a spot above your shoulder, “Dare.” 
You sighed, feeling the questions wanting to claw their way from your throat with nowhere to go. You knew what you wanted her to do - what you wanted to dare her to do - but the words would only cause her to withdraw further. You felt like you had to approach Ellie as if she were a scared animal, ready to flee at the first sight of danger. 
Wracking your brain for something mild, you said, “Try to recreate one of those dumb popular TikTok dances.” 
You didn't miss how Ellie's shoulders relaxed, her hands noticeably unclenching. She looked at you and it was almost like nothing had happened; like she hadn’t been avoiding you for three entire weeks, becoming a ghost in your apartment. Like you both hadn’t made what had obviously been a drunken mistake. 
The beginning of a smirk tugged at her lips as she dug in her back pocket for her phone - its case had an astronaut on it, because of course it did. The screen illuminated her face, flashes reflecting minutely in her eyes as she scrolled. She bit her lip absently - she often did when she was thinking. You tried not to stare and failed miserably. 
“This’ll be easy,” she muttered to herself, half laughing. She scrolled through a few videos, and she had the volume down on her phone, but you could still recognize the song that kept playing on repeat; you were going to fucking die. 
There were several minutes of quiet, only the music playing from Ellie’s phone. With nothing to do but wait, you brought your legs up onto the bed, tucking them under you; your eyes wandered around the room, taking in the stack of paintings by her desk, both finished and unfinished. The figurine she had of Kassandra from Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey had toppled on her desk, her spear falling in a glob of paint, the tip smudged bright yellow. You investigated the posters she had hung up of her favorite bands - almost all of them with female singers; she had a very specific taste. On her nightstand, in a frame made of macaroni, there was a picture of her and her dad, taken at the zoo when she was quite a bit younger, the blurry image of a giraffe in the background. She was holding up a peace sign, smiling so wide her eyes were practically shut. 
You turned back when Ellie stood up from her chair, placing her phone on her desk. Shoving her hands in her hair, she said, “Can’t promise this’ll be anything amazing, but you get what you paid for.” Even as she said it, she was smirking, a dangerous twinkle in her eye. 
You watched as she rummaged in her closet, shoving aside probably half a dozen flannels and at least 10 different band t-shirts. She rummaged through a bucket with a few beanies in different colors, and you couldn’t see her face, but you already knew she would be wrinkling her nose like she always did when she was getting frustrated. 
You jumped, startled, when she suddenly exclaimed, pulling her head from her closet and turning to you with a triumphant grin. She held a black belt in her fist, holding it up like a trophy. 
You shook your head at her, even as your throat closed up with anticipation. “If it took you that long to find one, it’s no wonder your pants are always hanging from your fucking ass.” 
“Hey,” she said, picking up her phone again and looking at you with mock offense; she was still smirking. “I don’t exactly hear you complaining when my ass is out.” 
You heard the stutter, heard the way her breath caught after she said the words. It was so stupid - a stupid little remark that she would have made any other day three weeks ago. She wouldn’t have even thought about it, wouldn’t have batted an eye. You would have rolled your eyes and said something mean in response - something like, “I save my complaints for when I see your face instead.” You would have laughed and then watched a fucking movie or something. 
Instead, Ellie only coughed awkwardly, ducking her head to fiddle with her phone. In the dim light, you could see the flush of her cheeks behind her bangs. You looked anywhere but at her, your eyes darting around to find something to focus on that wasn’t how pretty she looked when she was flushed pink - how pretty she looked with her cheeks red from alcohol and exertion, her lips shining wetly - 
Your brain short-circuited when Ellie started the music - only the bite-sized sample that was trending on TikTok. She set her phone on her desk and took a deep breath, waiting for the song to loop again as she positioned the belt by her hips. She didn’t look at you, instead casting her eyes to the ceiling and muttering, “This is gonna be so stupid.” 
When the music looped again, you were forced to watch as Ellie thrust her hips to the beat, pulling the belt slowly away from her hips. When she brought it up to wrap the piece of leather around her neck, pulling it taut, you were surely convinced you must be paying for some sort of crime, that this was your eternal torture. Her movements were janky, stuttering and unsure and off-beat - she had only watched the videos for a few minutes and was relying solely on memory to guide her limbs. When she tried to tie her wrists into the belt, she got stuck, her hands ending up in a knotted mess. Still, her eyes met yours when she raised her bound hands above her head - coincidentally or purposefully - and you couldn’t look away. 
This was definitely Hell. It had to be. 
When the song started to loop again, Ellie hastily tried to pull her hands from the knot. The belt clattered to the floor, abandoned, as she scooped her phone up, fumbling with the buttons to cut off the music. She nearly dropped her phone in her haste. 
When the room was silent again, Ellie sat back down at her desk. Last time you had played, you had asked her to do something ridiculous for her first dare, and she had grinned with pride, practically preening. Now, she wasn't smiling; she hardly even looked at you, fiddling with one of the many paintbrushes on her desk. You compartmentalized the image of her thrusting her hips with her hands bound over her head, saving it for later. You always did torture yourself with these things. 
Ellie was looking at that same spot over your shoulder when she said, “Truth or dare?” She sounded pained, her words strained against some invisible weight. It was like your very presence in her room - on her bed - pained her, but you couldn’t bring yourself to leave and give her relief. 
“Truth,” you said, hoping against hope that she would ask you fucking anything about that night three weeks ago. 
But she had never been that easy. Ellie had never been one to give you straight answers and she wasn’t about to start now - especially not now. So instead of saying anything - asking anything - about that night that she seemed keen on forgetting, she asked, “What’s the worst first date you’ve been on?” Before you could protest that you always told her about your worst dates, she added, “One I haven’t heard before.” 
So for the span of one question, you let yourself believe that you were still talking to your best friend. That she hadn’t been avoiding you for three fucking weeks and this was only your typical truth or dare game in between studying. You believed that you were simply gossiping with Ellie, who had been your best friend for several years and nothing more. In the space of one question, you let yourself believe that this was still only a game and not an intervention. 
So, in the spirit of pretend, you thought for a moment, rifling through the index of all the shitty dates you’ve been on. Ellie had already heard most of them, had been there whenever you came back home; she was there whether you were heartbroken or relieved that you wouldn’t see the person again. There were a few times where you had come home laughing, and she had passed you a joint as you told her all about the horrible date - you would take twice as long to tell the story because you couldn’t stop laughing. 
Finally, you said, “Okay, this was before we came to college. We weren’t close enough friends in high school for me to tell you, so I don’t think you’ve heard this one before. Stop me if I’m wrong.” She waved her hand for you to continue, twirling a pencil between her fingers. “I had just graduated high school so I was dating around before I left for college - nothing serious, just casually looking around.” 
“Window shopping,” she interrupted you with a grin - that same easy grin she always had with you. Your heart tugged embarrassingly at seeing it again. 
You swallowed the lump and continued, “Yeah. So, I went on a date with this guy - he was some friend of a friend’s, I didn’t know much about him. We went out to dinner at some local dive bar - which was already fucking weird because, like I said, I had just graduated high school.” 
“Was this guy a fucking cradle robber?” Ellie said, wrinkling her nose. 
You shook your head. “He may as well have been. He was either 21 or he was just really good friends with the bartender because as soon as he came in, he got two beers - the cheap shit, too. It tasted like musty ass.” Your stomach twisted when she laughed. “So we sit at a booth and I finally get a second to really look at him.” You leaned forward, bracing your hand on the bed so you wouldn’t fall, and made sure she was looking right at you when you said, “And this motherfucker was wearing a shirt that said Black Rifles Matter.” 
You reveled in the way Ellie’s jaw dropped, her eyes widening. Her lip turned up in disgust, and the only thing she could say was, “No.” 
You grinned, nodding, and you had to focus really hard to not start laughing. “Yes. And I rolled up to this dive bar, fresh out of the womb, with bright pink hair freshly dyed and a crop top that literally said Femme on it in bright pink letters - which, okay, maybe not the choice to wear on a first date with a straight guy, but still. I was in this booth with a baby face looking every bit as queer as I am, and this fucking dude with a patchy mustache and a shirt that has more problems than I care to admit opens up by telling me he doesn’t like when girls dye their hair.” 
Ellie was rolling her eyes, on the edge of her seat. She leaned closer as you continued, “But fine, whatever, everybody has preferences I guess. But this guy gets three beers in, and he’s already been talking about weird shit - conspiracy theories and telling me how kids today are too soft - one of those fucking guys, right? But then he stops,” you hold up your hands for emphasis, leaning even closer, “and he leans into me over the table, and he looks me straight in the eye - you wanna know what he said?” 
Ellie groaned. “Tell me he didn’t ask who you voted for or some shit.” 
You barked out a laugh; it echoed on the walls. “God, I wish. No, this bitch looks me dead in the eyes, his breath reeking of bad beer, and he says, ‘Are you on your period? I have this weird talent for smelling when girls are on their period.’” 
You watched, delighted, as Ellie slapped a hand over her mouth, muffling a choked gasp. “No!” 
You couldn’t stop laughing, pressing your hand to your stomach as you fell back against the sheets. Her laugh filled the room like helium, making everything feel lighter - easier. Even now, you couldn’t help but marvel at how easy it was being around Ellie. And for a moment, you did forget what had happened. You forgot about the string pulled taut between you waiting to snap. You forgot that this was anything more than simply another dumb game of truth or dare.
Until you looked up and saw the press of Ellie’s lips again, the way her eyes darted away, and you could feel yourself sinking again. 
And that’s how the hour went. Ellie - infuriating Ellie - did every single dare you asked of her. She did a handstand for a minute straight, her face turning so red you thought she might pass out. She called the local pizza place you often ordered from and asked for one hundred sardine pizzas, laughing when the poor teenage boy on the other line started stuttering. Last time, she didn’t take all the liquid in the fridge and make a nauseating cocktail; but this time, she did go and find four different liquids of her choosing - apple juice, almond milk, an old flat Dr. Pepper, and the remaining vinegar in a Kimchi jar - and downed it in front of you. She tried her hardest to hold a straight face, but only ended up scrunching her eyes closed, clapping a hand over her mouth to muffle a gag. She never chose truth. 
For your part, you never chose dare. You answered every pressing, embarrassing question she asked, ignoring the flush to your cheeks. You told her the most absurd dealbreaker for a relationship. (“What do you mean you’ll break up with someone if they don’t like garlic?” Ellie asked, smiling even as she shook her head.”) You went through the original Wiggles band and said which you would fuck, marry, or kill (“There are four of them! Do I choose to have a threesome?”) 
And you waited. Each time you chose truth, you held your breath. You watched Ellie mull it over, her eyes darting around as she thought, and prayed that she would just ask you something. You knew it was an unrealistic wish, but you still watched her lips and hoped against hope that she would give you some kind of acknowledgement that this wasn’t all for nothing. You just wanted her to stop being such a pussy and fucking talk about what happened. 
But the clock kept ticking. 
After about an hour had passed, Ellie looked at her phone and sighed, standing up. “Okay, I really have to get back to studying. I have this dumb astrophysics exam tomorrow and I can’t wrap my fucking head around this shit, so I have to -”
“One more,” you cut her off, standing up from the bed. You followed her as she walked to the door, one step behind her when she put a hand on the doorknob. She paused, her hand frozen there as she looked at you - actually looked at you, not through you. It was only a moment, but it was there; you could feel the way her eyes had branded your skin even after she’d looked away. Your voice was rushed, breathless when you added, “We haven’t even opened the bottle, so what’s one more? Just for fun.” 
Ellie looked behind you, back at the vodka bottle on her desk with the seal still intact. She sighed, but she never could say no to you. 
“Fine,” she said, and her voice was so quiet in the dark room; the word felt like a secret between you, soft against the tension stretched thin. “One more.”
You nodded, taking a deep breath. You tried to sound casual - you really did - but when you spoke, you found you couldn’t speak any louder than a whisper, afraid to disturb the air around you. You ducked your head, trying to meet her eyes when you said, “Truth or dare, Els?” 
She looked at you, meeting your eyes, and she seemed to deflate, sighing out a breath that ruffled your hair - you hadn’t realized how close you were. Her breath smelled of canned ravioli and weed; it was almost enough to make you laugh. 
Ellie took a step back, clearing her throat, and answered for one last time, “Dare.” Because she was too afraid of the fucking truth. 
And fuck it if your heart didn’t stutter in your chest. You felt your fingertips buzzing, your stomach twisting nauseatingly. You felt like you were going to be sick, but you forced yourself to look up at her. You squared your shoulders, feeling like you were preparing for fucking battle, and said, the words familiar on your tongue, “Kiss me.” 
A moment of silence passed, the words suspended between you. They were tangible, and part of you still wanted to snatch them back - to swallow them and leave, to pretend this never happened - but you didn’t. You held them out to Ellie - you weren’t sure if they were a threat or an offering. 
Ellie didn’t recoil, and you weren’t sure if that was more insulting. She looked at you for a long moment before turning away, shaking her head and turning the doorknob. “I really need to study, okay? I don’t have time for thi-” 
You put your hand against the door, holding it there so she couldn’t open it. Your stomach was a mess, tying itself into knots that you would never be able to undo. And you knew - you were far too aware - that this could ruin everything. It could drive her further away, pushing her further into this little cocoon she was hiding in. Ellie might hate you for it. 
But this was too important to ignore. 
“Kiss me, Ellie,” you said again, and you could feel the bite of it on your own tongue. When you had said it three weeks ago, you had been so unsure. It had been a rush of words on a breath, tinged with alcohol and desperation. The words had been so careless, a sober idea that had made its way from your drunken mouth. 
Now, Ellie was the one who couldn’t look at you. She stared at the spot where your hand pressed to the door, willing you to let go. Her knuckles were white around the doorknob. Her voice was a rumble that you felt in your chest when she said, “I need you to leave. Please.” That last word - please - made your heart break. 
You swallowed around the lump in your throat and said, “No.” 
Ellie finally turned her whole body towards you, but she was wearing a mask; she had schooled her face into a mockery of nonchalance, her eyebrows raised expectantly as she watched you. She crossed her arms, leaning against her hip, and watched you with measured expectancy, shaking her head. She shrugged and said, “What do you want? I really need to study.” 
And it was the lack of care that broke you. 
You slapped your hand against the door in frustration, feeling the sting in your palm, disappointed when Ellie didn’t so much as jump. You shook your head at her, and you were so fucking angry you could feel tears stinging at your eyes. You blinked them away and snapped, “What’s your fucking problem?” 
Ellie’s eyebrows shot up, her mouth opening in indignant shock. “What’s my problem?” 
“Yeah,” you cut her off before she could even continue. “What’s your fucking problem? You know what happened - what we did - but ever since that night you have been so determined to act like it never happened. You haven’t even talked to me in three fucking week, Ellie!” She closed her eyes when your voice broke on her name. “You’ve hardly looked at me all night. And look,” you sniffled, feeling some of the fire in you die down, “if you regret it - if you want to act like it never happened and go back to how things were before, I get it, okay? But can you at least have the balls to fucking tell me?” 
Your voice echoed off the silent walls, filling the space between you until you couldn’t breathe. You wiped a hand roughly over your face; your cheeks burned and you hated yourself for it. The room was so quiet you feared Ellie could hear the sound of your racing heart. 
It felt like hours before Ellie spoke; her voice was so heartbreakingly quiet, tip toeing on eggshells that were already broken. “I don’t regret it.” 
You huffed out a breath, shaking your head as she still wouldn’t meet your eyes. She couldn’t even look at you. When you took a step closer, you could feel the heat radiating off of her body, could feel the warmth in your chest. Your voice had lost its fire, your throat cold and raw and broken. You could only murmur, “Then kiss me again, Els. What are you so afraid of?” 
“You,” she snapped. You jumped, taking a step back; your heart lurched when she finally looked at you. Those shattered eyes were watching you, so open and vulnerable you wanted to look away. You forced yourself to watch, to bear witness to it when she shook her head, blinking tears from her eyes. Ellie pressed her lips together, blinking several times before releasing her held breath. She held your gaze like it was a lifeline and said, “I’m scared of you.” 
And just for a moment - so filled with silence it might pop - you saw it. You saw how Ellie had run from you like an injured animal, hiding away. You saw the way her hands shook around her biceps. You saw the way she bit her lip to keep it from quivering. 
You shook your head, feeling so incredibly small underneath those eyes that had avoided you all night; now they were vividly, overwhelmingly focused, broken in the hazy light and so green it was dizzying (and you couldn’t even blame it on the alcohol this time). You didn’t recognize your own voice, so small and vulnerable that the words themselves ached: “How can I fix this, Els? You want me to-” You huffed out a heavy breath, choking on your own voice. “Do you want me to act like it didn’t happen? Do you want me to leave you alone? I’ll do whatever you want, Ellie, I just… fuck. I just want my best friend back. So just… tell me what I did wrong.” 
You jumped when Ellie barked out a laugh, so dry it cracked. It may have been a trick of the light, the soft string lights making everything feel unreal, but when she looked at you again, she went impossibly soft. 
“You,” she said, so softly it ached, “haven't done anything wrong.” She sighed, leaning back against the wall; it was like all the fight suddenly drained from her, her shoulders sagging against the weight of three weeks. She looked away, her lashes casting shadows over her cheeks, and said, quiet as a confession, “You were drunk.” 
You furrowed your brow, shaking your head. “What?” 
Ellie ran a hand through her hair, making it even more disheveled. Pathetically, you wanted to fix it; you knew how soft the strands would be under your fingers. 
“You were drunk,” she repeated, as though it pained her; as though it explained everything. Her voice broke, the shattered pieces falling at your feet. “And I…. Fuck, I shouldn’t have pushed you. I shouldn’t have… forced myself on you.” She heaved in a shaky breath, her words tumbling from her, broken glass cutting her throat, leaving it raw. “I couldn’t even… wait for you to wake up after. I just fucking ran - I couldn’t even look at you, and that’s even shittier! And for three weeks, I’ve been trying to figure out how to fucking talk to you when I know that we - that I shouldn’t have done that.” 
Ellie pressed her hand to her mouth, taking in a shaking breath - her entire body was trembling as she fought to hold it all in. She looked ready to burst, struggling to take in a deep breath. You reached out to grab her hand - to hold her together - but she flinched away. 
“I don’t-” you started, unable to find the words. You watched your best friend dissolve, and you couldn’t seem to fit all her pieces back together. “Ellie… Els, are you saying you’re avoiding me because - because you thought you took advantage of me.” The words tasted ridiculous on your tongue, a foreign object.
Ellie was shaking her head wildly, her hands balled into fists. “You were drunk!” she repeated, like a mantra. She pressed a hand to her chest as though to keep everything in. “You were drunk, and you kept telling me no, and I just… pushed. I pushed and I didn’t know when to stop and, fuck, I still can’t believe I did that and I didn’t even have the fucking balls to face you or even tell you I’m sorry, and-” 
“Ellie.” You reached out and grabbed her wrist, cutting off her rambling; she flinched again but didn’t pull away. She looked up at you, her eyes wide and vulnerable and so impossibly green. “For one, do I need to remind you we were both drunk. And that I was the one who told you to kiss me?”
She watched you carefully, guarded; her bottom lip stuck out and, embarrassingly, you found you wanted to kiss it again more than anything. She took in a deep, shaky breath, ignoring the tears running down her cheeks; they mixed with her freckles like watercolor. “You kept telling me to stop - to leave it alone. And I didn’t listen.” 
“Els, I told you to stop because I was scared,” you admitted in a rush. Before she could respond, you continued, “Not of you. I was scared of how badly I wanted you, okay? And that’s fucking embarrassing to admit, but I’m saying it so you know it wasn’t your fault. I was scared because… fuck.” You scrubbed a hand over your face, feeling tears on your own cheeks. “Because you’re my best friend. And I knew that, as much as I wanted it, it could fuck everything up. But I didn’t want you to stop.” 
She shook her head. Her voice was raw when she said, “You couldn’t fuck anything up. You didn’t do anything wrong.” 
“Neither did you,” you practically shouted. “Ellie, I asked you to kiss me! Yeah, I had a few shots that night, but I knew what I was doing. You asked me how long I’ve wanted it - what did I say, Els? Tell me.” 
Ellie looked up at you, her cheeks splotchy from crying; she let you slip your hand into hers anyway. “A long fucking time.” It was no more than a whisper. 
“Yeah,” you said, gripping her hand to keep her grounded. “Not just when I was drunk. Not just when it was late. And definitely not just when you wanted it too. I’ve wanted you for a long fucking time, Els.” 
Ellie watched you, studying you like you were an equation she couldn’t figure out (she really needed to study for that astrophysics exam). She pursed her lips, nodding slowly, rubbing roughly at her damp cheeks. “Yeah.” Her voice broke again; she cleared her throat. “Yeah. Me too.” 
You took a step towards her; her body was so warm it was dizzying. You could hear her breath catch when you reached up and pressed your palm to her cheek. 
“What do we do now?” 
When she sighed, you could feel it on your lips. You felt the warmth of her hand at your waist, a steady anchor. “Like you said,” she murmured, her gaze soft; she reached up to brush your hair from your face, her fingers grazing the side of your neck. “This could fuck everything up.” 
Your heart lurched; you swallowed it back down so it could throw a fit right next to your twisted stomach. “Yeah,” you whispered, afraid to break the spell that made Ellie’s eyes watch the way your lips moved, captivated. “But….” 
“But,” Ellie repeated, leaning in so her nose brushed against yours; it was cold against your skin. 
You hardly had to move to kiss her, tilting your chin up to finally kiss that pouty bottom lip you had been staring at. You heard her breath catch again, her fingers pressing at your waist, drawing you closer so the warmth of her pressed against you. After three fucking weeks, you hadn’t forgotten how her lips felt against yours. It was just as intoxicating as it had been the first time; you were dizzy with the way she moved her mouth against yours, warmth spreading through your chest. 
Ellie broke away from you, but she didn’t stray far; she pressed her forehead to yours, and you could see that her eyes were still closed, her brow furrowed. She sounded impossibly small when she said, “Are you sure about this? I mean, what-”
“Ellie,” you interrupted; you twisted your fingers into her short hair and tugged lightly, delighting in the gasp it pulled from her lips. “Just shut up for once, okay?” 
You hardly even heard her replied Okay before her mouth was on yours again. Last time she had kissed you, you had felt lightheaded, floating with the weight of alcohol in your veins. Each press of her hands on you had felt unreal and distant, like she was touching you in a dream. 
Tonight, the vodka bottle sat unopened and forgotten on her desk, and Ellie was pressing against you with a sharp realness that made your breath stutter in your throat. When her fingers ran along your jaw, cupping your face and tugging you closer, they were lightning against your skin. She had the welcoming warmth of a bonfire, and you were like a fucking moth drawn to her. 
Ellie took a hesitant step forward, pressing you back, moving so slowly as though she thought you’d push her away. You let her push you backwards - encouraged her, really, entwining your arms around her neck and tugging her with you. You stumbled on the last few steps, practically falling back against the wall; Ellie braced her hands on either side of you to keep herself up, laughing into your mouth. You wanted to swallow the sound, to take it into your chest where it could curl up right next to your heart. 
The wall was cold against your back, but Ellie was quick to chase it away; her warm hands ran up your back, rucking up your shirt and scratching her nails lightly over your skin until you shivered. She was so gentle with you this time, running her fingers over your skin with such careful deliberation, as though each kiss and each caress was meticulously planned out. 
It was with this painstaking consideration that she lifted your shirt, pooling it around your chest; you raised your arms so she could pull it over your head. 
Ellie snickered, snapping the strap of your bra against your skin. “This is new.” 
“Shut the fuck up,” you said, batting her hand away. It was one of your nicer ones, and you couldn't tell her that, embarrassingly, you had worn it on purpose with the hopeless thought of just in case. “Sorry I’m not in my pajamas. I’ll be sure to fix that next time.” 
She grinned, ducking her head to press a kiss to your jaw. She hummed against your skin, “No, I like it.” 
You didn’t talk about the implication of what you had said - next time. But the way she kissed her way across your jaw, her teeth grazing over your skin and sending a shiver down your spine, promised a next time. As Ellie’s tongue darted out to lick along your pulse, you could feel the words in the breathy sigh that escaped your lips. When she ducked her head to bite at your collar, she branded the words into your skin. 
“You’re such an asshole,” she said, her laughter warm against your skin. She pressed a gentle kiss to your collarbone; the bruise had long faded, but the phantom ache was still there.  You could feel her smile when your breath hitched. “Just had these on full display. Drove me insane.” 
You huffed out a laugh that stuttered when she pressed a kiss at the edge of your bra. “I had to get your attention somehow, didn’t I?” 
Ellie lifted her head to meet your eyes. Her voice was barely above a whisper, her breath brushing your lips when she said, “You’re crazy if you think you’ve ever not had my attention.” 
When she kissed you again, it was with a new fire that burned bright in your chest. Her hands gripped your hips, pulling you closer so that you could feel her body against every inch of you. Her fingers dipped below the waist of your pants, pressing at the soft skin there. You felt her tongue press against your lips; when she ran it along the room of your mouth, she swallowed your moan. 
Ellie hummed against your lips, pressing you firmly into the wall and shoving a knee between your legs. You gasped at the sudden friction, heat pooling in your stomach when Ellie gripped your hips and pulled you closer, grinding against her sweatpants-covered leg. Her lips brushed against your ear and she murmured, “Tell me to stop and I'll stop.” 
She had said those same words last time, pressed drunkenly into your skin. There was an affirmation hidden somewhere underneath: Do you still want me? Before, they had been slurred, like a sloppy kiss against your lips. Now, her hands steady against your hips, her body warm from something other than vodka, it was whispered like a promise. 
You answered by pressing your hands to her chest; she didn’t fight you as you pushed her away, didn’t hesitate as you walked her backwards until the back of her knees hit her bed. She let herself fall backwards, but she wrapped her arms around your waist as she did so. You fell into a crumpled heap on top of her, knocking the air from both of your lungs, and you could feel her laughter against your neck. 
Lifting yourself up on your elbows, you glared down at her; she only answered it with a grin, lifting herself just enough to kiss you briefly. You couldn’t suppress your own smile when you said, “You’re infuriating.” 
Her eyes sparkled mischievously. She hooked her fingers in your belt loops and gave them a tug as she said, “Yeah, get used to that.” 
You kissed her again to hide your smile. You didn’t talk about the inclination of that either. 
Growing impatient, you swung your legs on either side of her, sitting up and straddling her hips. Ellie’s hands ran up your sides, captivated, as though refusing to keep her hands off you for even a moment. You idly ran your fingers over her stomach where her hoodie had risen up, the warm skin right above her sweatpants; you delighted in the way she shivered at your touch. 
“This doesn’t seem fair,” you hummed, running your hand higher up her abdomen, revealing the expanse of soft skin; if you pressed just a little bit harder, you’d be able to feel the muscles beneath. You smiled when you heard her breath stutter, chest rising just slightly to meet your touch. “You’re wearing way too many clothes.” 
Ellie - ever enthusiastic - wasted no time in sitting up just enough to tug her hoodie over her head, leaving her hair an absolute mess. She tossed it across the room; you thought you heard it knock something over, but you didn’t have a chance to look before Ellie was grabbing your hips, digging her fingers into the soft skin. You gasped when she used the leverage to pull your hips down, grinding against her. 
This time, she was the one not wearing a bra - she had been home studying all day, so you hadn’t expected otherwise - and your eyes raked over miles of fair, warm skin. You wanted to run your fingers over it and watch the shiver your touch pulled from her. You wanted to press your lips to every inch of hot skin and feel the way her body arched into you, chasing your tongue. 
But she was watching you with an intoxicating shade of anticipation in her half-lidded eyes. You realized you had been staring for a few seconds too long because she had that cocky ass grin on her stupid face. 
“Like what you see?” she teased, pulling your hips down again so you had to bite down a moan. 
“Shut the fuck up,” you mumbled. You couldn’t tell her how many times you had imagined what she would look like under your hands or how you had always wondered how far down her freckles went (you couldn’t keep yourself from running your fingers down her chest, tracing them like constellations). You couldn’t tell her how your eyes had tracked her anytime she walked around the apartment in a sports bra or, sometimes, in only a towel, your imagination running away from you. 
If you told her, she’d never let you live it down.
Instead, you let your hands drift across the small swell of her chest, feeling the way her body arched into your fingers. You had to bite back a grin when your thumb brushed over her nipple, feeling her body shudder beneath you. You wanted to record the way her breath caught in her throat to listen to over and over again. Her eyelids fluttered, her lip caught between her teeth; you knelt down to kiss her, hard and deep, smiling into it when you pinched her nipple gently and she moaned against your lips, fingers tightening around your hips. 
You needed to taste her, you realized. Your mouth watered with it. 
You bit her bottom lip between your teeth, grinning when you heard her hiss. You took a moment to kiss your way across her jaw and down her neck, open-mouthed kisses pulling sighs from her lips. You couldn’t resist sucking the skin into your mouth, feeling the way her pulse jumped under your tongue and loving the moan that rumbled in her throat, her fingers gripping your hips so tightly you were sure you'd have bruises - again. But when you pulled away and saw the red beginnings of a bruise on her pale skin, a thrill ran through you. She would have to walk around with a physical reminder of how you had made her feel. 
You loved revenge. 
But you weren’t like Ellie, who had taken her sweet time in unraveling you. You didn’t have that kind of patience - certainly not now, not tonight. You had spent far too long holding yourself back - too long averting your gaze, never letting your touch linger. You had spent so long schooling your own imagination, trying to ignore the way your heart stuttered whenever Ellie wandered too close. You had spent too many nights letting your mind wander, only feeling safe to let your imagination run when you could hide in the dark; you had spent far too many nights with your hand between your legs and the fleeting image of green eyes and that crooked fucking smile. 
So no, you didn’t have any patience left in you.
When you reached between your bodies and pressed your palm to her sweatpants, you swallowed her moan, drinking it in and feeling like you could survive on it alone. Maybe it would finally satiate your fucking thirst. 
Kissing your way down her chest, you pressed the words into her skin - “I can't fucking believe you though I didn’t want this.” - before pressing the flat of your tongue to her nipple. You could get drunk on the breathy moan that dripped from her lips, the way she arched up into you like her body ached to be closer to yours. She pressed her hips into your palm and you could feel the heat through her sweatpants. 
When you pulled back just enough to tug at her sweatpants, Ellie started laughing, breathy and hitched as she said, “Little eager, aren’t you?” Even as she said it, she was lifting her hips, pushing hastily at her pants to get them off faster. 
The fabric was damp when it dropped to the floor, pooling around her ankles. Stepping off the bed, you placed your hands on her knees, pushing them apart. You dropped to your knees and pressed an open-mouthed kiss to the skin above her boxers. Her skin was hot under your tongue when you said, “Haven’t I waited long enough, Els?” 
Ellie only responded with a moan as you sunk your teeth into the soft flesh of her thigh and pressed the heel of your palm to her underwear. You grinned against her skin when she cursed, grinding down into you. You soothed the bite with your tongue and backed away to admire the red beginnings of another bruise. 
Ellie groaned, twisting her fingers in the sheets when you ground your palm into her. “Fuck, I’ve waited long enough too, right?” 
You couldn’t hold back your grin, tugging at her boxers so she would lift her hips. With her underwear around her ankles, Ellie lifted herself up on her elbows so she could look down at you. Whatever she saw - you on your knees between her legs, lips parted so your hot breath fanned over her - made her groan, another breathy curse falling from her lips. She reached down and carded her fingers through your hair, fingers soft against your temple. 
You smiled, blinking coyly up at her, and said, “Little eager, aren’t you?” before pressing the flat of your tongue to her clit. 
The moan that wracked through Ellie’s chest sent warmth spreading through your stomach, an ache pooling between your legs. You raised your eyes to watch her as you licked a slow, painstaking stripe over her slit, watching the way her mouth fell open in a choked gasp. The metallic taste of her on your tongue made your head spin; you moaned when she twisted her fingers in your hair, delicious pain stinging your scalp when she tugged. 
Ellie gasped your name like it was a promise. “Fuck - what the fuck -” Nonsensical words dripped from her lips with abandon, sweet as honey to your ears. When you ducked your head down to press your tongue inside her, a brief, hot pressure, her fingers tightened in your hair, her voice hitching when she cursed again, her words slurring together. 
You wrapped one arm around her thigh, feeling the muscle trembling as you pressed your fingers into the soft flesh. You ran your other hand up her stomach, feeling the way her breath quickened in the rise and fall of her chest. Stretching further, you flicked your thumb over her nipple and tightened your arm around her thigh when her hips bucked, holding her in place. 
You wrapped your lips around her clit, sucking it into your mouth and fighting back a smile at the keening whine it pulled from her. Her fist in your hair tugged you closer, guiding you exactly where she wanted you - and how could you resist her when she was chanting your name like a prayer? 
A shudder wracked through Ellie’s body when you flicked your tongue over her clit, lapping at her like you were starving. (After waiting so long to taste her, you might as well have been.) She groaned when you pinched her nipple between your fingers, her thighs clamping around your ears. Her legs shook when she came, your name on her tongue as though it were the only word she knew. You coaxed her through it, the flat of your tongue licking over her clit until she was gasping for breath, her hips slumping back against the bed. 
You peppered kisses over her thighs as she came down, your hand brushing across her stomach in soothing circles. Your knees ached from the cold floor, the carpet burning against your skin, but you couldn’t convince yourself to move just yet. When you glanced up at her, Ellie was looking down at you with glassy eyes; she had slumped back a little against her elbows, her limbs jelly - you tried not to let that go to your head - but she held out a hand to you, grasping for you. “Fuck, come here.” 
You both took the time to finally scoot further up the bed, Ellie's head propped on her pillow, her hair a messy halo around her. She pulled you on top of her, bracing her hands on your hips as you straddled one of her legs. When you leaned down, she tilted her chin up to meet you, kissing you lazily, licking into your mouth like she had all the time in the world - like she could kiss you forever and it still wouldn't be enough. With your elbows braced on either side of her head, it felt like you were both in a small bubble, the world left outside to wait for you. Fuck, maybe you did have all the time in the world. 
You gasped when Ellie raised her leg, pressing it between your thighs with an intoxicating pressure. She used her hands on your hips to push you down, guiding you as you grinded down against her. She broke away from the kiss, taking a moment to just look at you. Her pupils were blown, swallowing the green entirely. 
She grinned, endearingly lopsided, and murmured, “Now you're wearing too many clothes.” You whined a protest when she took her hands off your hips, but she only reached behind you to fumble with the clasp of your bra. It took her a few tries - you bit back a laugh when she cursed in frustration - and she threw it across the room when she finally got off. 
“Who the fuck designed those things?” she grumbled, fingers quick on the button on your jeans. 
You got off of her for only a moment, just long enough to kick your jeans and underwear off, but each second her skin wasn't on yours was agony. Your clothes hadn’t even fallen to the floor before Ellie was pulling you back in by the nape of your neck, her other hand guiding your hips back over her leg as she kissed you with a hunger that may as well have devoured you. You hissed when her teeth sunk into your lip, her tongue soothing over it before licking into your mouth. 
Your breath caught on a broken moan when she pressed her thumb into the dips of your hips, pressing you back to grind against her leg. The feeling of your bare pussy sliding against her thigh made you lightheaded, the dizzying pressure sending sparks through your stomach. Ellie's fingers still on the back of your head twisted in your hair, giving it an experimental tug; you felt her smile against your lips when you whined. You were pliable under her hands, your hips stuttering against her leg. 
Ellie pulled away, pulling you back by your hair just far enough away for her to look at you; her eyes raked over your body with a hunger that set you nerves on fire, looking ready to devour you. 
“God, look at you,” she breathed, raising her leg just slightly, the added pressure making your heart stop. Releasing your hair, her hand ran down your side, sliding across your chest. You moaned when her thumb grazed over your nipple, your hips stuttering; her other hand on your hip tightened, fingers digging into the bone. “So fucking wet for me and I've hardly even touched you.” 
“Shit,” you cursed when Ellie bucked her hips, her thigh grinding into you. You tried to glare down at her even though you knew your own traitorous eyes betrayed your growing desperation. Her cocky smile didn’t quite land, its impact softened by the way she watched your lips in fascination, her pupils blown - you couldn’t see the green anymore. Your voice wasn’t nearly as hard as you wanted it to be, your want softening the words: “Fuck off, Els, don’t be a dick.” 
“Am I being a dick?” she asked in mock offense, pouting up at you. “Good things come and all that shit, right?” Ever as she was teasing you, Ellie’s hand crept down your stomach, fingers warm against your hungry skin. She lowered her leg just enough to slide her hand between your thighs. You gasped, feeling lightning in your veins when those calloused fingers slid over your clit, already wet with want. Her eyes darkened, her lips parting. She slowly circled your clit, sending your hips jerking into her, and said, “Fuck, look at you. God, I finally get to see you like this….” 
You struggled to speak past the breathy moans beginning to drip from your lips: “Finally? How - ah - fuck - how long - how long have you…?” You couldn’t think of a way to finish that sentence, your thoughts clouding over when Ellie dipped just the tips of her fingers briefly inside you, gathering your wetness. 
“Like you said,” she murmured, finally pushing two fingers slowly inside you; even as she kept talking, she watched your face carefully, searching for any sign of discomfort, “a long fucking time.” 
Your jaw went slack when she curled her fingers, gasping when she found that spot that made you see stars. She paused, as though giving you a moment to adjust, unaware of just how many times you had done this with your own fingers. 
“Shit, Ellie,” you moaned, canting your hips down into her hand. She adjusted her arm, positioning herself so that the heel of her hand pressed to your clit, pulling another breathy moan from your lips. Her other hand was still on your hip; she pushed you back, guiding you to grind on her fingers. “Ah - fuck.” 
She watched you carefully, fascinated by the way your eyes rolled back in your head, your brow furrowed; you felt her own wetness on your thigh again. Her voice was so fucking breathy when she said, “How long have you wanted this, baby?” She hummed; releasing your hip, she ran her hand up your side to knead at your tit, her fingers so careful against you. You groaned low in your throat when she flicked her thumb over your nipple. “How many times have you come thinking of me? Did you imagine my fingers inside you, angel? Did you moan my name?” 
You couldn’t even think of a snarky response; you were too distracted by the way her fingers curled inside you as you fucked yourself against her. Her rough palm slid deliciously against your clit, grinding into her with a growing desperation that made your thighs shake. Your shoulders ached from holding yourself over her but it was only an afterthought as you felt a tight warmth building in your stomach. You leaned down just enough to kiss her, moaning into her mouth when words failed you. 
“Fuck, look at you,” Ellie repeated, groaning when your hips stuttered. You were lightheaded, fucking yourself desperately on her fingers, grinding down against her palm and chasing that intoxicating warmth spreading inside. “So fucking pretty for me.” 
She kissed you as you came, licking into your mouth and tasting herself on your tongue. You pressed your clit down into the heel of her hand, riding it out, feeling the way that warmth spread down to your fingers. Ellie broke away from the kiss to trail her lips down your neck, leaving wet kisses along your skin and saving every broken moan that was gasped right into her ear. 
Ellie didn’t move as you came down, letting you ride out your high, tracing gentle circles down your side. You slumped against her, your arms giving out; your weight landing on her forced all the air from her lungs. She only laughed breathlessly. 
It was several long moments before you were able to move again. Ellie ran her fingers through your hair as you gasped into her neck; she hummed absently and you could feel the vibration against your lips. 
When you were able to, you slowly lifted yourself off of her, wincing slightly at the sudden emptiness. With gentle hands, she guided you back down to lay beside her; you curled up against her without waiting for her invitation, resting a hand on her bare chest so you could feel the steady pounding of her heart. 
Ellie didn’t wait for invitation either before she wrapped her arms around you, pulling you closer; she was blissfully warm against the suddenly cold air. Something tugged pleasantly at your chest at the realization that you would no longer have to monitor your own movements so carefully - you could touch her, you realized, any time you wanted now. God, how were you going to ever stop now? 
Without anything else to say, you sighed against her skin: “A long fucking time.” 
Ellie hummed, giggling at your delayed answer. The fairy lights on her walls cast the room in a warm glow; with the hazy lights around you, you would almost believe this was a dream if Ellie wasn’t so solid and warm beneath your fingers. You traced the freckles across her chest, connecting constellations you had seen her chart before. 
Her voice was so quiet in the small room when she asked, “What do we do now?” 
You hummed, feeling sleep winning the war inside you. “We can figure that out tomorrow,” you said, pressing a kiss to her collarbone. Tilting your head, you leaned up just enough to kiss her, warm and deep and breathless, before moving away to meet her eyes. “Just don’t fucking run off again, okay?” 
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athenasgotu · 1 month
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minors and men dni !!!
title: you're all i need.
pairings: teenage!ellie x female!reader
summary: after so many things happening in your life. a break up, sister passing away, and then losing half of your friends. only one person stuck with you and it was ellie. she never left your side, and overtime you grew feelings for her. but you cant get your hopes up.
content warning: mentions of self harm, fluff, some angst, coming in terms with sexuality, swearing, mentions of vaping/smoking, mentions of suicide
i apologize if i miss anything !!
a/n: not proofread.. also, the reader in this is a small, submissive, type of girl.
part 1
it's been a few weeks, still missing your sister. but also missing ellie, a lot. it was quite unusual but you really wanted to be around ellie. she made you happy all the time. just her presence made you smile, how did she do it? she was just your light. all you wanted to do was play with her auburn hair, her fingers, her lips- wait. what are you saying right now? ellie is your friend. friends don't do that and you sure as hell aren't into girls like that. you've only had one boyfriend, he was pretty shitty though. but now you're getting off topic, all you want to do is be with ellie right now. but you don't want to bother her.. she won't mind! you hope.
you take your phone off the charger and go right to ellie's contact, you didn't even realize the amount of messages she sent you. you'd always have your notifications off and you were too busy sulking in your room for hours and cutting yourself but just a little so your mother wouldn't notice. you start texting ellie, asking her if it was okay for you to sleepover.. or maybe that's too much? maybe she wouldn't like that. but you had to stop overthinking and just do it. you finally hit 'send', sighing in relief. it wasn't long before ellie started typing, she sent 'yes! of course.' ellie's dad was very laid back, so he wouldn't mind having a friend of ellie's over. you went over to your mom's room. your mom was smoking as usual, the smell of cigarettes was horrid.
"mom, can i sleepover at ellie's?" you ask, keeping a distance from her. she looked over at you and she didn't care at the moment, or didn't care about you. "yeah, whatever." she grumbles. though, you didn't like the way she replied you were happy she was letting you.
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
after a quick bike ride to ellie's house, you knock on the door a few times. you were never so excited until now. you get to see her face, her smile. you felt really warm inside probably the nicest feeling you've had in a while. the door finally opens, you see her. tall, beautiful, ugh.. she was wearing baggy shorts with a tank. her muscles were visible and you looked in her eyes. they looked bloodshot. was she okay? "hey, y/n." she smiles, taking your hand to let you in. her hands were cold but firm and much stronger than yours. she leads you upstairs to her room, her room was a little messy but it was nice. she had an red electric guitar to the side and plushies. her bedroom was pretty edgy and dark. not typically your style. she closes the door and walks to her desk.
"um.. how are you feeling lately? you didn't answer my messages." she says while looking on her desk for something. "i'm sorry. i'm ok, don't worry." you say quietly as you put your bag down. you tilt your head to the side seeing ellie search for something. "what are you looking for?" you ask innocently. she finally picks up the small object and looks at you. "my vape." she takes a hit, blowing the smoke out slowly. you didn't know she vaped, even though you've known her for a while. maybe a new habit? "you vape?" you watch her walk to her bed and sit, you walk towards the bed but don't sit. "yeah," she looks at you, smirking. "you can sit down next to me, it's alright." you blush; not noticing. you sit down, she pulls you closer. she rubs your back slowly. "you don't look okay. you can talk to me, y'know?" she says with a reassuring smile, taking another hit. should you tell her? you didn't want to seem like you were looking for attention. you just wanted to be with her, look now she's basically holding you. "it's just.. my sisters death has done a lot to me. i just want to be with her. my mom doesn't really care about any of this i don't understand how? i don't know.." ellie listens, then takes a look at your wrist. she moves her hand off your back and gently takes your wrist, she sees the few small cuts. "y/n.." she mumbles. you feel your eyes watering, you didn't want her to really worry about that. ellie takes you into a hug, you cry on her shoulder.
she felt so warm. she looks you in the eyes for a moment before cuddling you in the bed. "i don't want you to do this." she says. "are you going to kill yourself?" those words hit you in the heart, you didn't know how to react to that. "no, no.. but i've been thinking about it." you admit. ellie holds onto you tighter, you look at her vape. "can i have some?" you look at her, your beautiful doe eyes. she takes it and looks down at you. "are you sure?" she asks, making sure you didn't want to regret this. you nod. she hands you the vape, you tremble a bit before taking a hit. coughing loudly, ellie giggles. "it's not funny-" you cough in between. ellie pulls you in closer before touching your throat with her pointer finger. you freeze. her touch felt so good. she gently rubs on your throat, she smiles at you. "better?" you whimper a bit then nod. "m' good." she sighs and lays back. "get the lamp for me?" you move a little and turn the light off, you put your head on ellie's chest and sigh. you felt really nice in this position. "g'night, els." you mumbled, then finally shutting your eyes. ellie looks down at you, admiring your appearance. she moves some of your hair away from your face and smiles lightly. "night y/n."
╰┈➤ end of part 2 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪
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athenasgotu · 1 month
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masterlist
ellie williams:
forbidden love
╰┈➤ part 2
╰┈➤ part 3
you're all i need
╰┈➤ part 2
you and i ・❥・ holiday special
drunk in love
╰┈➤ part 2
vox:
yes, sir.
guidelines
rules 🤍
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athenasgotu · 1 month
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﹥*:ꔫ:*+゚🐇
hey dolls !! i've been meaning to ask, i need some requests for fanfics or wtv you ppl have in mind.
i've been wanting to write more hazbin hotel fics now that i've finished watching the series, and i loved it.
but here's the rules with this.
no pedophilia
nsfw is allowed
nothing involving abuse
wlw or mlm is allowed
i can't think of any other rules, but you all should know right from wrong. i really wanna do more vox fics so give me tons of requests for that please !!
that's all, bye dolls !! 🤍
┊ ┊ ┊. ➶ ˚
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athenasgotu · 1 month
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title: yes, sir.
pairings: vox x fem!reader
summary: you were pretty well known in hell, you weren't an overlord (yet). but everyone knew not to fuck with you. you were the 'i get what i want' type of girl. vox noticed your confidence, he wanted you for something. but he wants you to obey.
warnings: swearing, obsession, aggressive vox
minors dni !!
it was a normal saturday. you only had a few things planned and that was to have a meeting, with him. you didn't hate vox.. but he definitely wouldn't stop leaving you alone.
constant calls, messages, and you saw his drones flying around. he definitely knew what you were up to. it didn't bother you, you weren't scared of him. but you didn't want to disappoint him either. you had to meet with him at a restaurant.. what was this a date? god. you looked in your closet, there you found your red dress. you always wanted to look sexy, even if it was to impress this tv man.. but, it was worth it.
◇─◇──◇─◇◇─◇──◇─◇◇─◇──◇─◇◇─◇──◇─◇
as a few hours pass, you have your makeup done, your hair is curled, and finally your dress. you look beautiful. you sprayed some rose perfume on.
you couldn't walk in heels, how funny. so you wore your sneakers instead. hopefully, vox doesn't make fun of you. you took a cab, in the car you checked your phone. so many notifications. but one stood out to you.
vox: hey, beautiful. i'll be waiting.
beautiful? he called you beautiful? this guy must be a flirt. or maybe you're overthinking this. as you finally made it to the restaurant, you got out and paid the driver before walking in.
"name?" the person at the front desk asked.
they seriously don't know your name, lord.
"y/n. i'm actually with someon-" before you could finish you feel pointy fingers on your shoulders, feeling it push your shoulders down in a way.
"she's with me." vox said, smirking. he looked down at you. you were quite short. he drools red just for a moment while looking at you. his presence made you uncomfortable but comfortable? it was so hard to explain.
"oh shit! vox! yes, um.. go find a table.." the person said in quite a shock.
he smiled and took his hands off your shoulders and began to walk. you followed. he took you to the back with windows showing pentagram city. you sit down and he sits across.
"nice to meet you, y/n. you've made quite the show recently, hm?" he smirks looking into your eyes.
show? if he means how i literally killed a ton of random ass sinners, yeah.
"oh, um.. yeah. so, you've been really messaging me a lot.. and uhh-" you paused, you were nervous for the first time and it wasn't because he was an overlord. it was something else..
"oh! well, yes. i've just been dying to meet you." his voice gets more digital for a moment, his eyes look down at your cleavage for a moment. you clear your throat, he looks back up. "sorry.. you should really.." he leans over the table and pulls up the slit down your chest up. "cover that up. don't want anyone seeing that.." he smiles.
was he implying that only he could see or something? his touch did make you feel something though..
"are you going to explain why we are having this meeting..?" you ask. he nods.
"well, yes. i wanted you to actually work with me. or.. the vees to be exact." he smirks.
work with the vees? is he letting me join?!
"before you think, no you're not joining the vees.. at least not unless i consider it." he sighs, taking a sip of the glass of water.
right..
"okay, well what is that you want me to do?" you ask, tilting your head.
he leans back and smiles, showing his teeth.
"just do some small favors for me.. is that okay with you, y/n?" he stares straight into your eyes.
you weren't sure what you were getting yourself into, but you knew this is a big opportunity.
"yes-" he cuts you off.
"sir. say.. yes, sir."
you look at him a little shocked in a way. you nod.
"yes sir."
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athenasgotu · 2 months
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title: forbidden love. (part 3)
pairings: knight!ellie williams x female!reader
plot: ellie is one of the best knights in the whole kingdom, the first female one as well. you, the perfect princess. your mother has no clue you have a crush on ellie. but, your marriage is assigned. you couldn't get what you wanted.
warnings: eventual smut, little bit of angst, feeling unwanted, homophobia, negative thoughts, swearing, sexual desires
a/n: this chapter does have just like the smallest bit of smut. chapter 4 will most likely have smut. now, i don't usually write smut so bear with me 😭.
minors dni!
part 1 & part 2
MEN DNI❗❗
≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫
why did blair have to see this? she's going to tell mom for sure.. oh my god. my arrangement? what will happen to ellie? to me? you sigh and let go of ellie.
"blair.." you mumble. blair looks at you and ellie in complete shock. she never expected such disobedience from you. you knew the guidelines, and you broke them? out of all people. blair clutches the top of her gown and walks to you and ellie.
"sister.. you know better." blair looks at you. ellie was embarrassed and rubbed the back of her neck. you looked down feeling ashamed for your actions. you should've never fallen in love with her. why couldn't i just be normal? why does it have to be like this? your thoughts spiraled. you almost were completely distracted that your sister had to nudge your arm.
you jumped a bit, realizing you zoned out. "please.. don't tell anyone." you take your sister's hands and grasp on them tightly, begging her to keep this secret. if anyone knew, you'd be banished. ellie on the other hand.. executed. you couldn't let that happen to her. she was all you had, being forced to leave your home wasn't something you wanted either. why can't things just go back to how they were before? you and ellie, simple childhood friends. playing in the royal garden every once in a while. she'd talk about her training and show you her skills. but even before.. it was never "normal" you loved her, just didn't know it yet. why did you have to be like this?
"i.. i can't promise you-" you immediately cut your sister off. "i could be banished! do you really want that?" you were fed up with blair at this point. did she really want you to be cast away? thrown to the enchanted forest for good?
she lets go of her hands and sighs. "of course not," she turns around and was just about to walk away. right when you think she's done, she continued. "i have to follow the rules and so do you. i don't want you to end up like, him." she walks away, you hear her heels click-clack on the floor. ellie turns to face you, seeing the worry on your face.
"i'm sorry." she says. why was ellie saying sorry? she didn't do anything wrong. this is all your fault. if you didn't fall in love or be into girls.. everything would be normal. you'd be normal. "don't apologize." you say quietly. "you have absolutely nothing to apologize for. this one is on me." you grasp onto your dress and walk off. suddenly, ellie grabs your arm.
"let's go to my room, ok?" she says with a reassuring smile. god, that smile. who could say no to that? being in a room alone with her is probably all you need right now. you nod, letting her guide there.
・❥・
you wore ellie's clothes. her oversized grudge band shirt and a pair of flannel pants. pretty comfy than your dress. you laid down on the bed and she sat next to you. she gently rubbed your thigh. her touch was immaculate. her rough hands on your soft legs. it felt so nice. you feel her hand glide up to your waist, gently squeezing it. you felt a sort of arousal from this. wanting more. knowing ellie, she doesn't back down. she gets more aggressive as time goes on. this was just the beginning. the squeezing gets harder. she leans closer to you. "is this okay?" she whispered right into your ear. her hot breath on your neck. god. you nod. "yes- it is." ellie smirked at your nervousness. it was cute to her. just when was about to put her lips against yours, a sudden knock occurs.
ellie quickly moved away from you and yelled out. "who is it?" your heart was beating loud. please.. don't ruin this moment. "its the queen." fuck. your mom, of course. ellie puts the covers over you and gets out of the bed to open the door. "yes? what do you need, your majesty?" ellie asked. the queen looks down at ellie. "is my daughter in here?" ellie rubs her nose, it was a habit of hers. a cute one at that. "uh, blair?" the queen smiles a little and shakes her head. "don't act inarticulate. y/n, obviously." her big words confuse ellie in a way. ellie's usual language was just swear words. "ah- well, no." ellie smiles nervously. the queen looks away for a moment. "you certain?" she says again. ellie nods. "certain indeed!" ellie clears her throat, trying not to act so "enthusiastic". the queen nods and takes a step back. "very well then. sleep well, knight." the queen walks away and ellie shuts the door.
you uncover yourself and look at ellie. ellie sighs in relief. she walks back into the bed and lays down. she smirked again. that damn smirk. she patted on her legs. "c'mere." she said. you crawled over and go on top of her, ellie held your thighs down so you could straddle on her.
"now, where were we?"
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athenasgotu · 2 months
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source & source
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athenasgotu · 2 months
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I LOVE THIS SMMM!!!!
✦ MARLEY AND ME →【ELLIE WILLIAMS】→ CHAPTER FOUR
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pairing: modern!ellie williams x single mom!reader
summary: you’re a single mom just doing the best that she can to make ends meet. ellie can’t help but think that you're the kindest, most beautiful girl that she’s ever met. compared to taking care a little girl that's in her terrible twos, coming to terms with the fact that you’re a lesbian is a walk in the park. awkward first encounters, ellie’s broken gay-dar, and her overwhelming urge to take care of the care-giver. . . the road to domesticity is a long one, but it’s well worth the pining that it takes to get there.
warnings: eventual substance use, no use of y/n (you have nicknames/petnames), the reader is marley’s biological mother, talk of coming to terms with ones sexuality, mention of a shitty baby daddy ( though there is no co-parenting between them), ellie is a total girl mom, lots and lots of fluff, ellie is an anxious dork in this fic, reader is broke but happy, ellie takes pride in being a provider, this is going to be a multi-part fic, ellie is an absolute simp for the reader since chapter one and will remain her #1 fan.
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The knock on the door is to the tune “Head Over Heels”- or at least you think it is. Ellie doesn’t have enough time to fully get through the chorus before you’re yanking it open, cheeks flushed all pretty and eyes wide. They glitter in the dim sunlight like jewels, staring up at her like she was the one that hung the moon. Ellie’s got that same dumb look on her face; mossy eyes wrinkled at the corners from the force of her smile. You would never know that she’s been up since seven o’clock in the morning, cramming for an exam that she had aced. She’d talked to Joel for the fifteen minutes that it took to get to your house, bragging on and on about how much easier it had been than she’d initially thought that it would be.
He let her brag. Of course he did. She wasn’t quite as talkative as she had been when she was a teenager, but she was still famous for her little tangents. Joel was good at listening, and Ellie? Well, she was a professional yapper. It was a match made in heaven.
Ellie smells like lavender, musk and patchouli incense. The scent of it clings to her hair and clothes. She’d mentioned a couple of times that she was a daily smoker, but she made sure to go out of her way to never smell when she was over at your place. The thought of your daughter cuddling to her when she smelled. . . funky made her cringe.
There’s a moment of appreciative silence as she stands on your front porch. The two of you just stare at each other, breathing the scent of each other in. The novelty still isn’t lost as far as your courting goes either. You can’t imagine the nervous butterflies ever going away. They’ve made a cage out of your ribs, fluttering away madly in your chest.
“Hey,” She breathes through her smile, her eyes dancing over your features. “Did I miss anything exciting?”
You look absolutely exhausted. Gorgeous, but exhausted nonetheless. Ellie has noticed that you do a very good job at putting others' needs before your own. You’d been at work for two whole hours before Ellie had even woken up this morning, and now you felt like you were on autopilot. You’d walked to your mom’s to pick Marley up, gotten her bathed and dressed in little play overalls and now the two of you were spending some quality time together. You could barely keep your eyes open, and yet you knew that you wouldn’t be able to get your screaming toddler to sleep for at least another three hours.
“Marles and I are making homemade play-doh right now,” You opened the door wider, tempting her into the house with a sweet smile. Who was Ellie to deny you of all people? “She’s been excited ever since I told her that you were coming over.”
Marley had taken to Ellie like a bee to honey.
The college student hadn’t had too many opportunities to be around children- especially ones as young as Marley was. She was unfamiliar with the tiny sticky hands, drooly mouths and unpredictable attitudes. Still, she was a natural. Marley gravitated towards her. Ellie was sure that the constant presents and sweet treats buttered her up, but she would be selling herself short if she claimed that those were the only reason that your daughter loved her so much.
Your three year old babbled from the kitchen, excitedly trying to piece together a sentence. Ellie closed the door behind herself, only to sweep you up into a bone crushing hug. Your laugh was muffled by the fabric of her soft cotton button up as you nuzzled your face into her neck. Closer, closer, closer. If she could absorb you into her body she would. It was hard to describe the level of admiration she felt for you. It was too early to classify it as “love”, but she supposed she did love you and Marley. Being in your house, as small as it was, felt right to her.
“I missed you.” You mumbled, arms fastened tight around her waist.
She barely had enough time to brush a gentle peck to your lips before Marley was bounding around the corner, bare feet slapping against the linoleum floors. You’d recently learned that wearing socks wasn’t a good idea. Your poor little girl had slipped and fallen far too many times for your liking.
Marley had become more comfortable in her body, which meant she was now running, jumping and climbing. Just a year ago you had been relieved that she could walk by herself without you holding her hand, and now keeping her off of your furniture was an impossible task. Nothing had prepared you for the constant changes that came with motherhood. You blinked and suddenly she was sassy and genuinely funny. She complimented you when you were wearing something unusually flashy and wanted you to put blush on her while you were getting the both of you ready so that she could “look like mommy”.
You never expected anyone outside of your family and close friends to appreciate your daughter in the same way that you did.
But then there was Ellie.
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Self indulgent. Waking up this happy felt sinful.
Your fingers gently glide over her gentle planes and curves, making a map in your mind of every inch of her. Each freckles a continent, each line a river.
You didn’t want to wake Ellie, too frightened that you might break whatever magic spell was currently suspended in the air between the two of you. This moment between you felt too good to be true, and that scarred little voice inside of you that you loathed so much was begging you to enjoy this while it lasted.
You were always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Happiness was fleeting. You felt like you didn’t deserve whatever was going on between the two of you. Your entire identity for the last three years has been summed up in a singular label: “ a mother”. You were a sexless, wantless, selfless creature meant only to teach and please. How dare you need a night off. How dare you choose yourself over an abusive relationship. How dare you need, want, desire, change.
But this? This was nice.
No, it was better than nice. Great? No. . . It was perfect. She was perfect. And that terrified you. Ellie scared the absolute shit out of you, and yet you couldn’t take a step back. It was like you were falling head first for a very, very long time. The ground is nowhere in sight.
You were free falling and you had no clue where you would end up when all was said and done. It felt selfish to put so much effort and care into so many new things at once. Especially since those new things could shatter your heart into a million pieces at any second. You knew that Ellie didn’t owe you anything. She was nice enough to give you a chance despite all of your faults. Your baggage had become too heavy for you to hold at times, so how could you ever expect someone else to help pick up the slack?
You weren’t even sure what the two of you were doing together. The two of you hadn’t put a label on your relationship, but she’d brought you flowers yesterday when she popped by for a movie night. She’d even gotten a small bouquet for Marley, who was far too small to appreciate them for longer than five minutes.
Ellie wasn’t your girlfriend, but she’d slipped Marley’s shoes on for her before you’d all left the house last night to pick up dinner. Ellie wasn’t your girlfriend, but she’d spent the night with you last night in your bed. Ellie wasn’t your girlfriend, but she’d held you all throughout the night.
She didn’t even try to get handsy at all last night, probably having seen the exhaustion written all over your face. She kissed you because she wanted to show you affection. She held you because she wanted to be close.
What you didn’t know was that Ellie felt the same way that you did. She was lost as to when to ask the dreaded “what are we?” question. The thought of pushing you away or losing you was agonizing, so instead she had deluded herself into thinking that she didn’t have to define things. It was clear that she liked you, right?
She’d never felt this way about anybody before. This wasn’t like any other crushes she’d had in the past. She felt fresh and new. Ellie even felt like she looked a bit different when she looked in a mirror. There was a glow to her; a sense of happiness that wasn’t just rare for her but something that she had once deemed an impossibility. She felt changed for the better.
It was easy to love Marley. It had happened naturally- like breathing. You don’t have to remember how to breathe. . . it just happens. With you it was different. Obsessive, maddening, all inhabiting affection. You’d wrapped your dainty hands around her heart tight, tight, tight. Every skip and butterfly is a gentle reminder that this was something. The both of you are something, and that is enough.
She smiles before she even has her eyes open. She can feel your fingers on her bare arms, and for a second she ponders whether or not she’s in heaven. . . or perhaps still dreaming. Waking up in your bed, the scent of your shampoo on all of the pillows and your soft hands on her- she could die right there, your room, her tomb. The headboard, her headstone.
“Are you real?” She whispers, her voice hoarse and still thick with sleep. She’s looking at you with those great, big green eyes. Your eyes are glued to the small collection of freckles just above her top lip, but you hear her.
“M’ real.” You mumble out a confirmation, propping your head up on your hand so that you can lean over her. You know your hair is a mess. . . but she’s studying your face with a silent sort of appreciation that has your throat feeling thick with emotion.
She’s soft. Ellie’s soft and wants to take care of you. She showers you and your daughter with affection without ever having to be asked to. Why? Because she wants to do it. You find it hard to believe that anyone would want to go out of their way like this. Especially for someone like you. You were a young mother who hadn’t gone to college. You lived in a tiny house, operated paycheck to paycheck, and had a few stretch marks on your tummy. You weren’t perfect. Not like Ellie deserved.
So why was she looking at you like that?
Oh god, how she stared at you. Her eyes were velvet soft as her eyes flickered over your face, taking in every feature. She’d never woken up next to you before. Your bedhead and glassy eyes had her heart blooming with warmth. The ceiling fan had a few strands of your hair falling into your eyes. She took the opportunity to tuck them behind your ear, feeling the softness of your skin. She committed that to memory too.
“I really like this.” Ellie finally admits, bottom jaw quivering a bit. She fiddles with her fingers under your comforter, a nervous habit.
“What?” You ask her incredulously. If Ellie’s eyes weren’t open she’d still know you were smiling. She could hear it in the way you spoke, and it had her seeing stars. And Ellie really, really loved stars. “Looking at my bedhead? You better not take any pictures.” You were already smoothing your hair down with your hands, brushing through a few tangles.
She caught your arms, shaking her head the best she could with it still resting on your pillows. “Waking up next to you. Being here with you two- this is really nice.” It was more than nice, but she didn’t want to scare you away by coming on too strongly.
You opened your mouth, getting ready to agree with her, but the familiar sound of tiny feet had you sitting up fully so that you could turn and face the doorway. You shot Ellie an apologetic smile, but she merely shook her head, sitting up as well with a small smile. She didn’t seem burdened by the existence of your daughter, which was something you weren’t used to.
Marley’s hair was an absolute disaster, per usual. It looked like she’d been caught headfirst in a tornado,wispy hairs bobbing as she shuffled closer to the bed in her footie pajamas. She had insisted on wearing them last night despite the fact that it wasn’t exactly cold enough for them. Her cheeks were pink and it was obvious that she had sweat in her sleep last night. You felt a tinge of guilt for letting her get her way, praying that Ellie didn’t think you were a bad mother for giving in so easily to her sweet demands. Sometimes it was impossible to say no to her.
She stood at the side of the bed for a few seconds, eyes still half lidded and dazed with sleep. For a second she just stared at you and Ellie, as if trying to connect the dots that someone else was in your house. It was incredibly unusual to have guests over at the house. . . well, that was before Ellie. Marley climbed up onto the bed, pushing away your eager hands when you tried to reach out for her.
Your little girl was headed straight for Ellie. You bit the inside of your cheek, feigning a look of jealousy when Marley wrapped her tiny arms around the other woman’s neck. Ellie’s eyes widened as she held the small girl to her chest, cheeks growing warm when she realized just how much your daughter liked her. She wanted to blame the constant presents and sweet treats, but that wasn’t the case. Marley loved Ellie because she was patient with her. She took the time to sit down with her, ask her questions- hell, Ellie even played with her, which your own mother often wasn’t in the mood to do.
“I can’t believe you, Marles.” You gasped out, nose wrinkling in faux dismay. You rubbed her arm up and down, trying to gently get her attention. Marley looked up at you through her long lashes, plopping her head down on Ellie’s shoulder in a very dramatic, very Marley fashion.
“She chose me fair and square.” Ellie boasted, using her hand to try and smooth down her crazy bedhead.
You took a mental picture, eyes pinching at the corners with the force of your smile. Marley had curled herself up into a ball and didn’t seem prepared to budge any time soon. Ellie didn’t even attempt to hand her off to you. Instead the woman stood up with a small groan, her black sweatpants hanging low on her waist. You tried not to stare at the exposed flesh of her stomach as her tank top rode up but failed miserably. The brunette turned her head to face you, having felt the heat of your gaze, and the both of you exchanged a knowing smile.
“She has her legs pulled up to her chest,” Ellie said with a chuckle, her arms secured tightly around your child. “You’re like a little potato.” She pressed a quick kiss to Marley’s hair when the tiny girl started giggling at the comparison.
“M’ not!” Marley squealed, sticky hands tanging into Ellie’s cropped hair. You watched as she gave her hair a tug, your stomach tensing in panic.
You started to stand up, ready to scold your daughter for her rough treatment, but Ellie was already walking down the hall. You sat in disbelief for a second, questioning whether or not you should go in and check on the two of them. You so rarely had time to yourself like this. It felt wrong to take advantage of this opportunity, but you had a feeling that Ellie had done this on purpose.
Was she trying to drop hints that you looked bad? You were absolutely exhausted last night, so you wouldn’t be surprised if your face was a mess and your clothes in disarray. You anxiously raked through your hair, kicking the tangled sheets off of your legs so that you could run to the nearest mirror.
“Are pancakes for breakfast alright?” Ellie had ducked her head back into the bedroom, a beaming Marley still propped up on her hip. You jumped at the sudden voice, glaring in her direction as she chuckled at your expense.
You weren’t used to being so hard on yourself as far as your appearance goes. Impressing people, these days, was the last thing on your mind. Ellie felt the same way though. She’d be a liar if she said that she hadn’t checked herself out in the mirror you had in the living room, anxious that she looked like hammered dog shit after drooling all over your pillow.
The weight of your head on her chest had her sleeping like a damn baby last night. Marley had acted as a wonderful distraction from her own embarrassment, especially when she realized the back of her hair was practically sticking straight up.
What you didn’t know was that she’d never spent the night with a girl. Not romantically, at least. The both of you were in the exact same anxious boat, and while Ellie knew that she was your first, you had no inkling that you were a lot of her firsts as well.
“Pancakes?” You parroted back to her, wetting your dry lips.
You began tallying up totals in your head, trying to figure out whether or not you had the cash to grab breakfast. You would like to treat Ellie and Marley. . . but after paying the water and the power bill two days ago, you barely had enough to put gas in your car. You felt your cheeks heating up as you tried to come up with a nice way to say “I don’t have the money for pancakes” without sounding like a shitty adult and an even shittier mother.
Ellie could see the way you were over thinking things, her eyes nervously flickering to your closet. You only had a few articles of clothing for yourself, and yet she’d never seen Marley wear the same outfit twice. She’d seen you with your calculator at the grocery store, nervously staring at a total. She knew that you weren’t financially secure- you were a young single mother. The brunette smiled at you, shoving her hands in her pockets as she leaned against the doorframe.
“I make really good pancakes, and it looks like you have everything I need. Marley would be an amazing help too. She’d make my job a lot easier.” She rocked back on the heels of her gray socks, biting the inside of her cheek as she looked at you.
You looked nervous, tired, and adorable as hell. Your band t-shirt was rumpled with sleep and you were standing in tiny white socks, all self conscious and overly critical. She wanted to kiss you… but she hadn’t brushed her teeth.
“Let me go ahead and take her to the bathroom first,” You ran through your daily checklist in your mind, though not forgetting to flash her a thankful smile that nearly had the girl’s legs buckling. “Oh! Uh. . . I have an extra toothbrush. You can have it. Do you want to use the restroom first? It’ll give me some time to get her outfit together for the day.”
Ellie wanted to be selfless and tell you that she didn’t want to go first, but her breath was probably stale and the last thing she wanted was for you to be grossed out by her. She couldn’t fuck this up. She refused to.
You found Marley in her bedroom, having already strewn toys around the room. You let out a small huff of breath, realizing that today was probably going to be a rough one. Each day was different with your little girl. One day she was a perfect angel, only doing what she was told. Other days. . . well, rambunctious didn’t fully encompass her level of energy. Today was going to be one of those days.
“Alrighty, Marles! Let’s pick out a pretty outfit, alright?” You started to walk to her closet, but froze as she began shaking her head. “You don’t want to put on a dress? Or what about some overalls so you can play better?”
“No!” She screamed, running to the other side of her room so that she could grab a few more stuffed animals off of her bed. She tossed those on the ground too, even going as far as to plop down on the floor.
You had hoped that Ellie wouldn’t see this. At least. . . not so soon into the relationship. If she couldn’t accept Marley on bad days like this then you knew she wasn’t the right person for you, but still- you had hoped to slowly introduce this lifestyle to her. Not flat out throw her to the metaphorical wolves. Or. . . to Marley. You felt your bottom lip quiver, but you caught it between your teeth, giving it a few nervous chews before you sat down next to her.
“Do you want to stay in your pajamas?” Your tone was nothing but loving and patient. You were used to this, but Ellie wasn’t. You could only pray that she could accept you. All of you.
“Yes! Please, mommy.” She was getting better at articulating her thoughts and feelings. You found it impossible to deny her when she spoke to you like this. Especially when she asked politely.
So you found herself nodding, flashing her a megawatt smile that she happily returned. You could make a special day out of this. Pancakes and pajamas? It sounded heavenly.
“You’re so polite, baby girl! Alright, we’ll stay in our pajamas today. How about that? And Ellie said that you’re going to help her make breakfast. Are you going to be a big help?”
“Yeah.” She replied, already focused on the baby doll in front of her.
Her hands were still stained a little pink from making the play-doh last night. Once she remembers that she has that to play with too, you can only imagine the mess she’ll make on your dining room table.
You’re beautiful and patient. Ellie watches the two of you interact from the hallway, her breath all minty and her smile all wide. She thinks that she can live like this forever.
And she prays that she gets to.
@viswifetotallyreal​  @lillysbigwilly​  @overtrred28​  @corpsebridenightamare​ @jokerpokimoon @macaroni676 @eveshyper @lil-elliesgf @fuckingstarellie @gold-dustwomxn @madislayyy @moonbluz @vianna99 @sawaagyapong @mrsromanoff @glory-grl @sadeyedsugar @inf3ct3dd @teatimedisaster @laucalo @ellieswilliamsgf @machetegirl109 @moonchild184 @onlinelesbo @lasting-lover @luvrrcharr @koremis @elsmissingfingers @whoreshores @crxmxnzl-c0rpzes @circe-is-struggling @cqrrnts @elliewilliamsmiller0 @harrysslutsstuff @shewantstoknow @laundrybag29 @darkerstarsstuff @elliesdesperatewife @rulerzreachf4n44 @eviestevie-14 @deliriousrn @diddiqueen @bready101 @felsweb @jaeminpookie @elliesswearjar @2012wannabe @abbysbae @boobabietch @amorqts
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athenasgotu · 2 months
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i love them sm omgg
I've watched Hazbin and I'm already obsessed with Charlie's dads ❤️❤️
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📻🍎
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athenasgotu · 2 months
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title: you're all i need.
pairings: teenage!ellie williams x female!reader
summary: after so many things happening in your life. a break up, sister passing away, and then losing half of your friends. only one person stuck with you and it was ellie. she never left your side, and overtime you grew feelings for her. but you can get your hopes up.
warning: mentions of suicide, swearing, and lots of angst. (minors dni!)
authors note: part 1 is more on y/n story and how she feels. ellie will be there to comfort her.
MEN DNI❗❗
part 2
╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗
one more month. one more month and no more school, no more stress, no more fake friends. how could someone possibly be this sad? mom is over it, why aren't you? your boyfriend calling you a slut? no biggie. just act like you don't care then no one will notice.
you walk out of your room to brush your teeth. numb. that's all you felt. you have no one. no friends. no love. no sister. wait.. ellie. how could you forget the one person who hasn't done one thing wrong? god, she's an angel. she hasn't left me, yet. you can't even dress nice for school, just sweats. your mom tries to get you to be happier. therapy, not working. quality time, making it worse. talking to her.
communication was never good with her, will it ever be? how can you tell her how you've been craving death? wanting to be with your sister. she was your light. she made you smile on days you couldn't. i mean sure, you had your rough times. but that's how siblings are, right?
or did she secretly hate you?
faked it all?
faked her love?
no. she couldn't have, hah. its funny to think i even thought of that.
suddenly, the time changed late. twenty minutes in the bathroom? jesus. time passes, you're in school.
you see your old friends, teachers, then her. she smiles at you and waves.
"hey! you feeling ok?" ellie asks.
am i? i spent twenty minutes in my own thoughts earlier.
"i'm good." you smile. great acting.
ellie nudges your shoulder and hands you a plastic bag with a cookie, she baked every once in a while even though it wasn't the best. she knew i like sugar cookies. she's so sweet..
"thanks els." you smile, but it was real.
ellie was the only one who could get you to smile. not even your own mom could make you really smile. ellie was special. really special.
as you two walked in the crowded halls, she makes it to her class.
"see you later?" ellie smiles at you again.
gosh, that smile..
you nod and smile back at her "mhm." you mumbled.
you walked to your class, attempting not to be late again. but it was math, you were already failing horribly in math. school makes everything worse for you. tears your soul down. not always though, your sister made those long eight hours fun and exciting. too bad she's gone. you groan under your breath. these thoughts weren't helping. you take your earbuds out and put on a song.
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you sigh in relief. finally, you can relieve some stress.
╭──╯ . . . . . hours later . . . . . ╰──╮
you were finally at home, alone. your mom was still at work, she wasn't coming back until midnight.
long shift, as usual.
you laid down in bed sighing. everything is going to be ok. you kept telling yourself. was it though? your life was already fucked up enough. how could it possibly get better?
⇢˗ˏˋ beep beep !! 📞
you pick up your phone to see a message from ellie. you smile, she always messages you.
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she worried so much.
she's so nice.
you put your phone down and turn off your light. hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day.
╰┈➤ end of part 1
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athenasgotu · 2 months
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forbidden love. (part 2)
pairings: knight!ellie williams x female!reader
plot: ellie is one of the best knights in the whole kingdom, the first female one as well. you, the perfect princess. your mother has no clue you have a crush on ellie. but, your marriage is assigned. you couldn't get what you wanted.
warnings: swearing, little bit of angst (minors dni!)
part 1 & part 3
୨⎯ ballroom ⎯୧
it was late at night, you were in your room as the helpers and maids tightened your dress.
you couldn't help but think about that one night you spent with ellie. god, she's so perfect. you thought. but you can't think like this. arranged marriage, remember? you can't be with ellie.
"ow!" the sudden tight pull took you out of your thought process. you sighed, and then looked at yourself in the mirror and grabbed your tiara.
this was it. the night you will see your ideal prince.
you put your tiara on, and walked out. the castle was quite silent due to everyone being in the ballroom, including ellie.
she always looked so nice in her uniform. hopefully, she'll think you look nice in your gown.
after ages of walking, you open the door and see people dancing. as you were about to go join, your mother pulls you back.
"you know the rules." she hissed.
you sigh in disappointment. why can't the rules change? just once.
you sat down on the throne and saw ellie standing on the sides, she smiled at you.
you blushed slightly, smiling back. your mother notices and taps your shoulder to get you to pay attention.
you quickly looked away, but then you saw the sudden pout on ellie's lips.
oh how i would want to kiss those lips..
dammit! enough with these lewd thoughts.
music suddenly began, you noticed your sister going up to her prince.
now, yours.. but where? as you stood up to shift your head to see.. you see a hand in front of you and then see the prince.
lord.. he was not your type at all. then again, your type isn't boys.
you took his hand and glided with him on the dance floor, the feeling of his hand on your waist made you sick. why couldn't this be ellie's hand?
ellie watched the uncomfortable look on your face.
"you are very pretty.." he whispered.
"thank you..?" you replied.
then, he pressed his lips against yours roughly.
your eyes were wide and shoved him away, causing him to fall.
everyone stopped and looked at you. the embarrassment..
you couldn't help but run out of the ballroom in tears. normal princess behavior..
you cried in the halls, wishing no one saw that.
then felt a hand on your shoulder.
"y/n.. are you ok?" ellie said.
you looked at her and hugged her immediately.
"i'm so stupid.." you mumbled.
ellie shakes her head in disagreement.
"no."
she slightly pulls away from the hug to look at you, she wipes your tears and smiles.
"you're perfect, remember?"
those words strike you in the heart, you feel it thump harder. she was too nice, too beautiful, too..
ellie puts her hand on your cheek, reassuring you in some way.
this is it.. tell her..
ellie slowly leans into you. is this it? will she..?
she then stopped.
"it's going to be ok." she smiled.
just tell her..
"ellie.. i.."
you groan, and just kiss her.
she kisses back without any hesitation.
it lasted what felt like years, then you two slowly separated.
"wow.." she chuckled.
you smiled at her, then heard the door open to the halls, seeing your sister behind ellie.
shit.
╰┈➤ end of part 2
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athenasgotu · 4 months
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title: you and i
pairings: modern!ellie williams x female!reader
word count: 353
summary: it's christmas eve, you and ellie spend it with each other.
warnings: swearing, inappropriate jokes/comments, mention of sex
a/n: this is just a short story, not a series !!
ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-
it's finally christmas eve. you girls decided to spend christmas alone this year at your apartment. it's 10pm, the lights from the houses are glowing from the windows and the tree is shining bright. you took christmas very seriously, ellie on the other hand didn't think much about it.
ellie is sitting at the couch, watching a cute holiday film while you're mixing up cookie dough.
"hey, els." you call out her name, she turns her head around to see you.
"yea, what's up?" she rests her arms on the top of the couch, she lays her chin down. you weren't looking at her. your back was faced to her, ellie had a great view. she smirks.
"can you taste this cookie dough for me?" you turn around to look at ellie, you smile.
ellie straightens up, making sure you didn't notice what she was staring at. "oh, yea sure." she gets up from the couch and walks over to you. she takes a small church of cookie dough and chews on it slowly, you look at her.
"so?" you smile. "how does it taste?"
ellie smiles, she kisses your cheek and licks her lips. "delicious, babe." she gets behind you and wraps her arms around your waist, she kisses your neck slowly.
you giggle from ellie's sudden touch. you begin to roll the cookie dough into little balls. ellie watches over you, she smiles. she loved watching you bake like this. she was glad she decided to spend christmas with you.
"you know.." she kisses your neck. "we could celebrate christmas.. differently.." she kisses your cheek. "y'know.. like-" you interrupt ellie.
"no, i already know what you're thinking. let's just have a fun christmas.. without the sex." you snicker and chuckle a bit.
ellie grunts, she tightens her arms on your waist.
"oh c'mon.." she sighs. "you promised me." she whines.
"oh, yea i did." you sigh, you put the rolled cookie dough down on the pan. "fuck, let's do it-"
"yes!" she exclaims, she kisses your cheek on and on again.
"but, let me finish the cookies first.."
happy holidays !!
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athenasgotu · 6 months
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title: drunk in love (part 2)
pairings: college!ellie williams x female!reader
word count:
summary: after your recent encounter with ellie, you avoided yourself from her. a friend of yours throws a pool party, inviting ellie. what could happen now?
sfw/warnings: (minors!dni) swearing, drinking, smoking, inappropriate actions, sexual thoughts
a/n: finally finished part 2 !! there's more "spicy" things going on in this one.. (but there's no porn) still isn't recommended for younger readers !!
part 1 !! ⬇️
ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-
it's been a few weeks since your last moment with ellie. you had to leave after that, she touched your chin?! you thought she was going to kiss you right there.. but of course, wrong again. all you could think about is what it would be like to kiss her. her soft lips on yours. the aggression it could've been. the way it could've gone to kiss, to full on sex.
that's what's really twisted your mind. the feelings of lust, wanting ellie to kiss you. wanting her to do certain things to you. the feelings took over, it was a lot to take in.
what if you kissed her? what would happen then?
suddenly, you hear a knock on your door. you really hope it's ellie, you open the door and see your friend fiona.
"oh." you didn't mean to say this out loud, but you were a tad disappointed it wasn't ellie.
"hey! haven't seen you in a minute." fiona smiles, she puts her hand on her hip.
you smile back. "hey, whaddya need?" you chuckle nervously, trying to act like you weren't thinking the most unspeakable things.
"just wanted to let you know i'm having a pool party tonight at my parents house. i tried calling you yesterday, but you wouldn't answer."
yea, of course you didn't answer. you had so much going on in your mind.
"oh! yea, cool.. but i don't think i can go. i have to study and shit.."
fiona groans, she shakes your shoulders.
"c'mon!! you never do anything fun. plus, i'll be there.. some of your friends will be there-"
you stop, some of my friends? as in ellie? is ellie even my friend..? oh, shit.
"will ellie be there?"
nice going, dumbass.
"ellie? ellie williams? yea, of course." she says, she smiles and looks you up and down.
"why you askin'?" she giggles.
"i just- y'know i just wanna make sure- why does it matter?!" you exclaim. fiona laughs slightly, you look at her slightly irritated.
"chill, i was just asking." she gets a notification on her phone, she looks back at you.
"alright, i have to head out. see you there?"
you think for a moment. maybe you should go, you and ellie won't be alone but it will still be fun. you guys could get drunk, do stupid shit. whatever..
"yea, i will."
fiona smiles, she is just about to walk out.
"see you later." she waves, she walks from the door and you close the door.
you walk to your closet, looking for the best bikini you could wear. something ellie would like..
a couple of hours have passed, you had a pink bikini with some white sandals. it looked pretty cute, really cute. you put some of your cherry lipgloss on, puckering your lips a bit in the mirror.
you go and grab a white cover up, you put your hair up in a high bun a little messy just how you like it. you spray some strawberry scented perfume on yourself, just enough.
you walk out of your room and go to the elevator, you see several people that were clearly invited to the pool party. they all had their bathing suits on. you sigh and wait for the elevator to move down.
finally, the elevator makes it down. you walk to the parking lot and get into your car and begin to drive.
˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚
eventually, you make it. you open the gate and see the glowing pool and all the people.
you grab your phone and take a quick picture for your Instagram.
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damn.. it was so crazy. but you only tried to look for ellie. you walk over to a bench and sit down, you suddenly feel those same strong hands on your shoulder from behind, you feel that hot breath on your neck, slowly moving down your cover up off.
"need help with this?" she says, she rubs your shoulders slowly.
you look over, you see ellie with a sly smile on her face.
"shit- ellie.." she sighs and looks at her.
ellie smiles and pulls your cover up off of you, exposing your bikini.
she sits next to you and looks at your bikini.
"soo.. how you've been? y'know.. since our little moment.."
she smiles.
that damn smile, it always got you.
"fine. you?"
"great." she puts her arm around you.
you shiver a bit from the cold water from her skin hitting yours.
"you gonna sit here lookin' pretty or hop into the water?" she smirks.
should I? I mean.. what if something happens when i'm in the pool.
fuck it. i'd do anything for her.
"oh! totally yea." you smile at ellie, looking into her eyes.
she snickers and pulls your hand, she drags you to the pool and walk in with you.
as you two walk in she holds onto your waist gently.
"you good?" ellie asks.
you nod, the feeling of her hands on your body felt so good. you wanted her hands all over your body, even the sensitive areas..
"yea.."
you notice ellie leaning closer to you.
"strawberry?"
you tilt your head.
"what?"
"strawberry. the scent?"
oh fuck, i'm so stupid.
"oh, yea. its just perfume."
ellie leans even closer.
why is she getting so close? damn, i must look so red right now-
suddenly, her lips are on yours.
her chapped lips on your soft lips, the rough feeling felt nice.
she pulls away.
"cherry lipgloss."
you were blushing intensely.
"uh huh.."
what the fuck just happened..?
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athenasgotu · 7 months
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title: forbidden love. (part 1)
pairings: knight!ellie williams x female!reader
word count: 1268
plot: ellie is one of the best knights in the whole kingdom, the first female one as well. you, the perfect princess. your mother has no clue you have a crush on ellie. but, your marriage is assigned. you couldn't get what you wanted.
warnings: swearing, a little bit of angst
a/n: new series most likely, part 2 will have more angst and serious topics. part 1 is just a quick summary of the story.
part 2 & part 3
﹥*:ꔫ:*+゚
sitting in your gorgeous bedroom, you write in your pink journal. ellie recently went out for patrol. you two were really good friends. there's nothing wrong with a knight being friends with royalty. unless, one has feelings for the other. that was your problem, you really liked ellie. of course, she didn't know. you didn't plan on telling her because you knew you'd have to marry a prince soon. it didn't matter if you wanted to or not. you had to carry on the royal tradition, whether you liked it or not.
your journal contained many writings of ellie, royal duties, family, etc. but mostly, ellie. ellie was on your mind 24\7.
without a warning, you hear the door open.
speak of the devil.
"fuuuuuck.." ellie groans while swinging her arms around in frustration.
before you look over at ellie, you sneakily put your journal in your drawer in your nightstand. you look at ellie, she seemed annoyed.
"what's wrong?" you ask, you pout a little. turning around on your bed, still sitting on it and look at her.
"i keep fucking up my aim with my bows." she crosses her arms and puckers her lips. "it's so damn annoying," she pauses and walks over to the bed, she looks right into your eyes. "i just want to be perfect."
those words hit you straight in the heart. hearing ellie say that broke your heart, because you thought she was perfect even if she was doing her best. "you are perfect." you hear ellie chuckle a bit. "nah, you're perfect." she smiles at you. "you're the definition of perfection."
you blush a tad from her response, smiling as well. "heh, thanks.." it was silent for a bit, you two just smiled at each other.
"um, so.. have you found your prince in shining armor?" she chuckles, slightly nudging your arm jokingly.
my prince? ha, in shining armor. ellie was in shining armor, but she was no prince. i had to marry royalty.
"oh, yes. my mother arranged me with someone." you sad. ellie makes that confusing face, she tilts her head.
"arranged?" she taps her foot. "your mom- the queen, arranged you with someone?" she walks towards you, she holds your hand.
you look down at ellie's hand holding yours, it made you heat up.
"have you even met him?" she scoffs slightly.
no, i haven't. but it's not like i even have a choice. i'll have to marry him one way or another.
"no.." you sigh. "it's fine. this is how it's supposed to work in royalty-"
ellie interrupts me, she seemed a bit more angry than usual.
"it doesn't matter! you should be able to choose who you want to spend the rest of your life with.. not just some random ass prince." ellie grips my hand even tighter.
she was right. i should be able to choose who i love. but what if i told my mother? imagine her reaction. what would be even worse if she knew you liked a girl, ellie to be specific. she would kill you. (not literally of course)
"well-"
a knock on your door occurs from nowhere. you pull your hand away from ellies and walk to the door, as you open it you see your mother.
fuck me. you thought.
"dear, what is ms. williams doing in your room? she's supposed to be doing watch duty." your mother looks down at you, then turns her face to ellie.
"oh, shit." ellie mumbles. "i'm sorry your majesty. i'll get right to that now." ellie quickly walks out the room, you hear her armor clash on one another. you tilt your head when you look at your mother.
"you should be in your dress. you have to sit on the throne with your father."
you moan in complaint.
"seriously? but i thought it was blair's turn-" your mother scoffs from you mentioning your older sister.
"no buts. get dressed, now."
your mother leaves your room, you shut the door and go into your walk in closet.
——————✧◦♚◦✧——————⋆
it's been a couple of hours, you sat on the throne with your father as you greet citizens from afar. but the only thing you could really think of was ellie. ellie was your spark. she made you smile more than your own mother makes you smile. she was basically your soul. unfortunately, you'll never find out if she feels the same.
knowing that you'd have to marry some random prince soon, made you ick. you didn't even know if you like boys in the way, the only female you've ever liked was ellie and to be truly honest, your crush on ellie wasn't ending any time soon. maybe, she really is your soulmate? or maybe it's all just a fairytale dream. fairytale or not, you loved her.
eventually, throne duty was over. you walked down the halls and making your way to ellie's room.
her room was at the very end of the castle, which was a lot of walking. all the special knights had their own small room in the castle. once you make it you knock on the door, you look down at the door knob turn and see ellie opening it.
"hey." she smiles at you, she looks at your dress. "dressed to impress, huh?" she giggles.
"yea, i guess.." you giggle as well, you smile. "may i come in?"
ellie nods, she steps out of the way. "of course, princess." you walk into ellie's room. it was small and cozy. she had a few posters on the wall of different bands, some comics on her shelf and two on her nightstand. then a small area with photos of her and a few of her friends, including you. her sword was on hanged on the wall same with her armor. you saw some of her artwork in a secluded area in the room.
"your room just keeps getting cuter." you chuckle, sitting on the edge of the bed.
ellie looks at your dress one more time, she smiles and walks towards you. "do you want something else to wear? you look sort of uncomfortable in that." she looks right into your eyes.
"i mean.. sure, i don't mind." you begin to get up from the bed. "i can go to my room and-" ellie pushes you back down on the bed, laughing.
"no, no. you can wear my clothes." she smiles at you.
wear her clothes? oh god, imagine the smell. it would smell just like her.
"oh, okay!" you seemed quite excited to do that.
ellie goes to her closet and finds an oversized shirt and some shorts. she walks towards you, handing you the clothes.
"here." she smiles.
you take the clothes, you look at Ellie. "could you help me unzip the back of my dress?"
she nods, you stand up and turn around. you feel ellie's cold hands on your back, unzipping the dress slowly.
once she was done, you begin to undress but see ellie is still looking. "could you-" she laughs, she turns around.
"i know, I know." Ellie smiles, you undress and take your dress off.
once you put on the clothes, Ellie turns back around. she gets on her bed and takes a comic book from her nightstand. she motions you to sit next to her.
you'll be so close to her. should you really do this?
you walk over to the bed, crawling on. you sit down on the bed close to Ellie. Ellie opens the comic and smiles at you.
"wanna read with me?" she smiles at you.
"yea."
╰┈➤ end of part 1
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athenasgotu · 7 months
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title: drunk in love (part 1)
pairings: college!ellie williams x female!reader
word count: 1183 (i've been writing this for three days)
summary: your friend invites you to your first college party. you didn't know she was going to be there. ellie williams, practically your enemy. you two HATED each other in highschool, why would it be any different now?
sfw/warnings: swearing, drinking, smoking
(disclaimer: this is sfw !!)
a/n: this will be a series this is just a quick start of it. sort of.. proofread.....ok enjoy !!
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩ ✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩
part 2 ⬇️
https://www.tumblr.com/athenasgotu/733724112939253760/%EF%BE%9F-%EF%BE%9F
after a few shots of God knows what, you feel relaxed, but everything was blurry as well. you put the plastic red cup down, leaning back in the chair.
"you good?" she says.
you look at your friend, you nod uncertainly, "yea, all good." you lick the liquor off your lips. looking forward, you see a familiar face. auburn hair, fair skin, small freckles spread across her whole face, the small slit in between her left eyebrow, that same arm tattoo. Ferns. holy shit. ellie williams? you thought. no, it couldn't be. you haven't seen that coldblooded face since high school. oh, fuck me. your intoxicated mind was thinking a lot.
out of all the people, it had to be her. suddenly, you see her eyes pierce into your soul for a moment. for some reason, your heart skips a beat, your chest tightens. you had no idea why your body was reacting to her glance like this. was it good? was it bad? it felt good.
you notice a small smirk appear on her face once she looks down away from you. of course, you continue to stare at her, admiring her. she doesn't notice, not until she looks back at you.
your pupils widen, you look down.
she didn't see right?
without looking up, you see the black converse the same ones Ellie wears.
she walked to you.
"didn't expect to see you here." she says in a raspy tone. she looks down at you.
still, you weren't making eye contact.
"look at me when i'm talkin' to you." she demands.
instantly, you snap up. you look right at her, feeling nervous and giddy, trying to not make it obvious.
"hey, ellie." your voice cracking slightly.
she smiles at you, she seemed nicer. why?
"you look good, cutie." she licks her chapped lips. you notice that, you take note on it. the way she did it was just attractive.
the new nickname caught you by surprise. not seeing her after a few years after highschool and this is how your first encounter goes? ridiculous. you were expecting her to be calling you names by now or teasing you. i guess not.
"so, how's life treating you?" she snickers. "still trying to impress people who don't like you?" she teases.
you spoke too soon. she hasn't changed, not even a bit.
"no," you pause. "i've been doing fine. you?" you look right into her green eyes, they were mesmerizing.
"what about me?" she smirks. "i wanna know more about you, cutie." she takes a chair, she pulls it next to you and sits down.
"c'mon. tell me more." she smiles at you.
more? what more could you say?
"oh, well-"
ellie puts her pointer finger on your lips, she shushes you. she smiles.
"actually, don't tell me. you'll bored the hell out of me." she blurted out. she smirks. as you scoff and you move her hand away.
"you're the one who asked, dumbass." you snap at her.
ellie pouts. she manspreads and puts her arms in between her legs.
"well, damn." she scratches her bottom lip and looks down. "i didn't expect you to actually start sticking up for yourself." she added.
you were shocked. she really thinks i wouldn't be sticking up for myself after all this time. sure, you were the quiet girl in high school but people change, you changed. maybe ellie can too?
"is that a bad thing? upset you won't be able to pick on me like you used to, hm?" i was having rather fun with this. being able to tease ellie back, it was enjoyable. maybe ellie liked it too.
"no-" she smiles. "it's a good thing. to be honest," she pauses for a moment. she looks right into your eyes and puts her arm over you on top of your chair. "i'm proud of you."
proud of me? she's proud of me? wow, ok. you didn't know why, but ellie being proud of you made you feel good inside. you felt important.
a smile creeps up on your face, you look at ellie.
"thanks." you said.
:・゚✧:・゚
it's been several days since the party. you're still thinking of ellie and what she said. i'm proud of you. it stuck to you. it made you feel good.
as you lay in bed, all you could think about was ellie. how she made your heart race, make you smile, and most importantly how she's proud of you. why did her pride make you feel so special? without a thought, you grab your phone and search for ellie's instagram.
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once you find it you scroll through. you see her in her jeans and sweatshirt. her half up, half down hairstyle. it was cute. you realize ellie's number is one of her posts, why the hell would she post her number? this was your chance. you could text her..
and that's what you do.
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holy fuck, you did it. she called you babe now? what is going on with her? it didn't matter, as long as she was good with hanging out with you.
once it hit 9pm, you got ready immediately. you were in the bathroom, you put on some lipgloss and did your hair nicely. you wanted to impress ellie and have a good appearance. you wore some jeans and a crop top. it looked cute, at least thats what you think. it all matters how ellie thinks about this. if she likes it, then its good. you hear a knock on the door.
she's here already?! it's only 9:30?
you quickly fix up your outfit and hair. your friend wasn't even here yet, then you get a text from her.
hey, can't make it.
you read. that little- she did this on purpose. she WANTS you and ellie alone. goddammit.
you open the door, you see ellie and your heart beat increases. your breathing fastens.
"hee.." you couldn't even get your word out. you clear your throat and smile. Ellie laughs a little by your reaction.
"heh.. hi." you said quietly. Ellie waves, she slightly moves you to the side to walk in. you didn't even care, her touch made you feel good.
she sits down on the couch, manspreading. she puts the joint in between here small pink lips putting her hand over to light it up. then, the smoke blows out slowly.
it was beautiful. she was beautiful.
you sat next to her, looking at her in the eyes. she looks at you too. the tension was real. it heated up in the room, or that's what it felt like. it was just your body. you felt so close to ellie.
"you good?" she asks.
you nod. "yea, yea.." you look down, trying to avoid the eye contact as always.
suddenly, you feel strong hands on your chin lifting your head up.
"you sure?"
ellie and your eyes lock with each other. you didn't know what to do or say. you glance at her lips, biting your own. you look back at her eyes.
what the hell do you do?
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athenasgotu · 7 months
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𓆩♡𓆪
˚ ༘♡ ·˚꒰ᥕᥱᥣᥴ᥆꧑ᥱ t᥆ ꧑ᥡ bᥣ᥆g꒱ ₊˚ˑ༄
i go by athena on here !!
my pronouns r she/her
i'll usually write stories, fanfics, etc.
and post random shit lmfao
i'm 17 and i'll most likely make sfw stories (w/ a lil spice)
i like tlou and i'm very much obsessed with ellie williams.
i take suggestions and ideas !!
masterlist
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