heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

Follow your gut instincts...What this means to me is.................

over thinking ever little detail

always cancelling

never DOING ANYTHING

Physically it causes me pain to do anything.

I can't let the illness WIN!

The current rota of physical issues im tackling include.............

Exhaustion from the pressure of pushing myself to complete a task (could result in being in bed for days)

Extreme SWEATING

Dyhydration

Heart Palpatations

Stomach Cramps

Bleeding finger nail beds

Crazy bowels

Super TENSE muscles (resulting in pain 24/7)

Breathlessness

Random mutism or over sharing (causes way to much over thinking)

Being an absolute space cadet (staring at the same spot for hrs)

Acid Reflux & feeling sick

Clenching my jaw & chewing the inside of my cheeks.

Shaking

Being paranoid im being followed or someone is coming to hurt me

These are just the physical issues. How do people live day in day out like this? There is NO cure, NO end or RESPITE. Its 24/7

Today emotionally im angry and I feel let down by the people who are meant to be helping me. 3 cancelled appointments last minute so far. I have zero control over this.

Feeling deflated & defeated!

#lost #gad #lostintranslation #isolation #lonely #depressed #pls help #emotionoverload #anxiety #why

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

I wish to love myself as much as these pictures show.

#FakeOnlineLiving #lostintranslation #gad #lost #isolation #ocean #FakeItTillYouMakeIt #follow your own path

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

I made it outside! 1st time in 2weeks. ***With the safety of my sisters dog for company.

#outsidelife #lost #gad #isolation #goodlisteners #beach #soundsofthewaves #dogsarethebest #rainequalsnopeople

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

DO something creative. It'll help. Nope still feel like S***

#gad #lost #isolation #ffml #anxietysucks #painfulisnottheword

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

Art Mondays = a distraction of the gut churning annoying never ending pain. When will the pain end? When will enjoyment be felt again?

#art #lost #missingmynonanxiousdays #makingamess #creating #itshouldntbethishard #noenjoymentinanything

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

Animals make the best friends.

#lostintranslation #lost #gad #outsidelife #immature #goodlisteners #whathappensnext

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

I managed to venture to a new place today. Which has been proving difficult over the last 6months more so than ever.

New finds, new adventures & new furry friends

#celebratethesmallthings #lostintranslation #shoutingkidscanbetoomuch #lost #gad #outsidelife #goodday #families #babysteps #tortoiseandthehare

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

An example of many 1-2-1 feedback sessions ive had.

Harsh words to process.

Makes me think why try so hard

#lost #lostintranslation #immature #hurting #isolation #lifemakesnosense

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

Although its an enoyable game. The lack of accurate realistic map made this game HARD work and at time stressful! How are the countries of Ireland & France in the UK???

#Maps #gamesnight #ocd #gad #ifyoudosomethingdoitright #doesthisbotheranyoneelse #maybetheotherversionshavebettermaps #tickettoride #onlytravelicandoatm #lostinanxiety #meltdowncityisnotonthemap

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

Another form.

#searchtofeelnormal #confusion #willthismakesomesense #helprequired #lostintranslation #gad #questions #whoami

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

Playing with reflections in photography

#photography #reflection #smile #goodday #noeyecontractnoproblem #GAD

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

Abstract writing to try to understand ones thoughts.

Title....

Its OK as it is a dream destination. RIGHT???

The waves, the sounds, the smells, the feeling of sand between my toes. That place i go to for that brain fog to lift, to calm my erratic thoughts. That distinct sea air.

Swish, Swosh, Swish, Swosh!

BUT SUDDENLY This tranquille space is filled with PAIN. Someone elses. You feel it. It soon becomes yours. Love versus ANGER, Right versus Wrong.

I'm drowning, I'm suffocating until I am MUTE!

BUT its ok because im in a dream destination. RIGHT???

I need an escape, where to go. Swim. Got to swim, dive right in and just swim. I pause for a breather. I'm so far out now there is only a gentle bob in the water. I'm just floating, just breathing. Its so isolated & tranquille.

THAT PAIN is pacing the shoreline, no swimming for them. Its time for me to swim back. Another day, Another story. Love versus Anger, Right versus Wrong.

BUT its OK as I'm in a dream destination so what CAN go Wrong.

#domesticviolence #GAD #anxiety #writing #thoughts #healthyoutlets #pain #lonewolf #isolated

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

Waves, Waves, Waves are Life, Powerful, Beautiful, Consistently the same shapes, have Soothing sounds or thundering noise.

#waves #naturesnoise #abstractart #hobbies #GAD #Anxiety

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

It was suggested I write a VERY brief timeline of traumatic events in my life prior to an appointment so i can communicate better.

This is missing a few details.

The most influential in my family life I think is I told my dad i had been sexually abused, he cried and said he would get me the help i needed. It was never spoken of again.

#Notbelieved #lost #runaway #hurting #GAD #Anxiety #lonewolf

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

This world is AMAZING when you stop and take notice

#sunset #stormwatch #rainbows #waterfalls #nature #beautiful #travel #goodday #cloudwatching

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Do you share your cake???

#coffeeandcake #animalsmakethebestfriends #goodlisteners #outsidelife #cantmakethisstuffup #goodday #GAD

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

Just breath and take in the view.

#peaceful #mountains #homefromhome #snowsoftensthenoise #goodday #GAD #tbc