#+1 hour researching about

[skitskatdacat63]

Fernando Alonso & His Relationship With Cards

I'm sure we're all familar with the cards on the back of Fernando's Vegas GP helmet by now, but did you know his relationship with cards goes a lot deeper?

I. Magic Tricks

You've probably seen or heard someone at least mention Fernando's propensity for card tricks. As far as I can tell he was doing them(publically) as far back as 2003 all the way to as recently as 2018. Even once performing a card trick, with a condom and a teddy bear(!??!?!??!!), in front of Valentino Rossi who said "How was that possible?"(x)

But how did this start? According to James Allen, "Fernando admits to having been heavily influenced by his grandfather, a mercurial figure, who taught him magic and card tricks, still one of his passions away from the race track."(x) And I'm not sure the validity of this one, because I couldn't find an actual source, but apparently he once said: "My parents are responsible for the two things I like doing most - driving and magic tricks. They bought me my first go-kart and a magician's kit."

In several interviews he described it as his hobby off track, and that he loved learning new tricks and surprising others in the garage with them! So clearly cards are pretty important to him both as a hobby but also to who he is as a person since they've been with him just as long as racing has.

II. Card Symbolism in His Helmets

This is the reason I originally made this post, but I thought I should also explain the origins of his card fascination first. As I said, we probably all remember the cards on the back of his helmet in Vegas, but did you know that wasn't the first time he had cards on the back of his helmet?

From 2008-2013, he used to have a pair of cards on the back of his helmets. The symbolisms of the cards themselves as well as the evolution of their design is really fascinating to me! Even more so with the recent development of the card choice in 2023.

Fernando said he wanted to reference his two titles in some way on the back of his helmet and after his friend sent him several ideas, he decided on having two cards(an ace of clubs and an ace of hearts, sometimes pictured with 05 and 06 on them as well), saying: "I picked the cloverleaf [the ace of clubs - Ed] to give me luck, but the only pity is that it doesn't have four leaves!"(X)

2008.

Here's the very first appearance of the cards! They're displayed flat, with the 05 and 06 clearly visible

2009.

Very similar to 2008, but with a slightly different design, and they're maybe a bit more straight with less shadow?

2010.

This is the first major change! I was sad they didn't have the years on them anymore, but then I realized they're sparkly to match with his signature lightning bolts on the top of the helmet!!

2011.

Honestly I'm still somewhat unsure if this is the actual 2011 helmet? It's pretty difficult to find clear photos of the back of helmets from older seasons. It's easiest to find them on replica sites or auction sites so I'm not 100%? But anyways, I like that this has the championship years on the underside of the cards

2012.

This is when I started getting weirdly emotional about the helmets. Do you see how they've progressed from being a centerpoint to being curled up and sad at the bottom of the helmet? Not listing the year anymore??

2013.

Same thoughts as 2012. And after this season, they cease to exist (just like his ferrari chair in the garage, WOAH CALLBACK), until cards make a reeappearance in his Vegas helmet, albeit in a different form

2013 Monaco(Honorable Mention):

For some reason 2013 helmets were easier to find proper pictures of, so I happened to witness this absolute beauty. The creativity of this helmet genuinely blows me away??? Wanting to keep the card motif, but making sure to incorporate it into the rest of the puzzle piece design?? Mwah! There was another special 2013 helmet but they didn't change the cards at all so I really applaud this one

2023 Las Vegas(The Return of The King):

The magnificent return! But look! The cards are different cards! Instead of being two aces, it's now an ace of hearts, a four of hearts(his driver number of course!) and, the, now iconic, representation of himself as a Joker. I literally could not believe my eyes when this helmet was released and I saw the Joker card, what a fucking silly old man....I really wonder if he felt nostalgic having cards on his helmet again or if he didn't think about it all and was just like, "ah cards because Vegas!!!"

III. Why Does This Matter?

*The rest of the post was factual, this is moreso my personal thoughts on the symbolism of the cards/designs

This post spawned from me recently watching the 2010 Bahrain gp and noticing "hey wait a minute...are those CARDS ON THE BACK OF HIS HELMET!?" It's a really tiny detail that's unfortunately covered up by the HANS device pretty much whenever he's wearing the helmet, so it's really difficult to spot! But I became fascinated with the fact that he had cards on his helmet before that recent helmet, and now here we are!

There's something to me about how the design of the cards evolves over the course of six seasons from the cards being front and center to being smaller, more folded up and closer to the bottom of the helmet. As I said, the 2012-2013 ones genuinely made me depressed because it feels, symbolically, like his hopes for getting another Ace are becoming more and more unlikely and falling away until they eventually fall falt and fade away entirely after 2013 and disappear for basically a decade.

But when they return? They're not the same cards! Instead of representing Fernando's championships, they now represent him as a person, displaying his driver number and his persona of being a Joker!! Though I do think it's interesting he happened to keep the Ace of Hearts, even though he talked more about the Ace of Clubs before. I'm not sure it's actually this deep in reality, but I like to think that it's him not letting his championships(and the lack thereof) define him, but rather letting who he is as a person shine and be the centerpoint instead! But on a sadder note, as @suzuki-ecstar said to me, maybe the Aces aren't there anymore because he's lost all hope for a chance at a third Ace entirely :(

#yes its finals week and im up to my eyes in coursework but instead decided to spend like 5 hours researching and writing this post #nah bcs i actually genuinely put more work into this then I think I have all semester dsfjdskjg #that thing about him using a condom and teddy bear in a magic trick genuinely had me crying with laugher. actual tears rolling down my face #<- HOW!?!? WHAT WAS THE TRICK?? its literally inconceivable to me what he did. oh if only there were pics UGH #anyways!! this post was a lot of fun to make!! i really really love the symbolism and design of helmets so this was a rly fun project #and i also went down a lot of rabbitholes while make this and saw many very weird articles from yore #i feel like i make an equal amnt of deranged posts abt seb and nando but i dont know why nando is gifted w all my well researched projects #<- i.e. chair post. that was the same level of research as this one but at least this one i could find actual sources about.... #idk theres smth about the extremely long history of nando's history that evokes research posts like this KLAJSLSKDJ #theres just so much that i dont think I ever really see people discussing! so i must create. #haha what was that joke tag i wanted to make abt my researched posts? I think: #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion #<- one day ill go back and actually tag posts w that. bcs the amtn of research compared to my actual schoolwork is so unwell #fernando alonso #fa14 #f1 #formula 1 #catie.rambling.txt #we do a little bit of f1

[adanaac]

love to do wiki work. hate doing it. love hating it. hate loving it.

(my fun little js project that im way too proud of. i love to click buttons)

#i have to keep stopping myself from going on 2 hour research tangents on what exactly byakkos fit is #and when exactly china invented the four gods (somewhere between 2000BC and 1 kajillion BC) #“why do u do this stuff if ur always bitching about it” well u see i love loving it. #also “well someone else will probably do it” was also the attitude i had in 2018 about both translation and the wiki #and then fuck all happened in the next 3 years which is why im here now #and also bitching about it is my love language <3 would never bitch about something i dont love #anyway my life has just been working on the wiki for the past month i think im a husk of a human being

[hdtv34]

So, a while ago in the middle of the night, I wrote the beginning of a shitty Hannibal fic. I decided to post the parts I have rn on here to see if it’s good enough to continue!

Carnival of Venice AU inspired by the Cask of Amontillado

- Blood, hannigram, main character death, m/m, murder, stabbing, drinking, masks, etc. I don't know how to do this. Alt universe, Will Graham POV, 1st Person POV, grammar mistakes, unfinished, the beginning of the story and then a small snippet of the end at the bottom of the post, and probably some mistakes in characterization. I mean I was half asleep when I wrote this. I would love ideas for costume ideas for characters if anyone has any!

Quick summary of the basic idea if you don't want to read it all:

Will goes to the festival with his friends for the first time, borrowing one of their old masks. There he met this man with a gorgeous mask; one as extravagant as an elk. He wouldn't normally be able to go up to the man with the intentions that he has due to society’s expectations to love a woman, but there he has freedom. They talk for a while and eventually, the man invites him to dinner. He told him to wear a mask with no bottom half but still hide your identity so that he’d be able to eat without taking it off. They meet again the next night and they have dinner. It all seemed pleasant and peaceful at first with the meal being like that of which Will had never seen much less tasted. It was all wonderful. Eventually, he realizes that the man nor the meat was as they seemed. The man was a serial killer and a cannibal. He had done the same thing with Will with that of many others. Yet in the end ‘I truly am sorry, William. You’ve been like no other…. For you, I think that I'll eat your heart first.’

Actual fic:

I was invited to a carnival in Venice by a friend of mine, Dr. Alana Bloom. Alana typically moves between Venice and Florence, so I wasn’t initially startled by her offer. However, I was very tentative. But, in the end, guilt weighed me towards the idea. I must admit, I’m not used to events such as this. The activity was… suffocating. She gave me a spare mask, a simple one that hides the entirety of my face. It was a golden knight.

As I found myself surrounded by a crowd of sharks, I heard the laughter of her voice grow further and further. At least she finds happiness. Eventually, I find refuge from the inane and mad near a few barrels of rum, wine, beer, juice, etc. Their unmarked property assures that it is not of a soul’s awareness, which barrel contains what. It was a gamble, but wasn’t also being at this carnival? A place to be whomever and act however without discomfort or fear.

I pour myself a handle of the second barrel’s contents. With a sip, I’m pleased to find myself consuming wine. As I stand near the stand, a stag walks over to me. His mask was black with golden accents and showed the lower half of his face. The beauty and detail left me in awe. I’ve never seen someone with such a mask. I nodded softly, readjusting my hood and mask as I stopped drinking.

“Tell me, what are you drinking,” the stag asked with an accent that left me feeling confused as I attempted to pinpoint its origin.

“Red wine.”

“I see. Which barrel? They never mark these barrels for some idiotic reason.” A scowl formed on the man’s face as he looked at the barrels with distaste.

I smiled under my mask, appreciating the stag’s scowl. “The second.”

“Ah, thank you. I appreciate your help.” He pours himself a wine glass of the drink before moving to stand next to me. “Have you come to the festival before? You seem… out of place.”

“No. This is my first time. I was invited by Dr. Bl—… the um… the woman in the bluejay mask.” I shifted uncomfortably, tilting my head towards her direction.

“Dr. Alana Bloom?”

My head perks up at the mention of her name, tilting lightly.

“She’s a friend of mine,” he explains instantly, “I would rather not provide any other details as they would hint at my identity, but please be reassured that I do know Dr. Bloom quite well. Do not hesitate to converse about her with me.”

I nod, although the fact doesn’t console me fully. I continued, “She asked me to come here. Provided my mask and everything.”

“Do you enjoy it here?”

“As you mentioned, this is not my scene.”

“Then pray tell, what is your scene, my dear?”

I hesitate for a moment looking in the stag’s mask. It was as black and dark as a nightmare’s soul or as a raven’s death. “What’s yours?”

He stays quiet, turning back to the crowd in front of them.

It stays like that for a while. The two of them together watching the others dance and drink. For a moment I see a moth attempt to court a red dragon before the dragon declines and turns away.

“Ballrooms.”I snap my head back to the stag upon hearing his newly sincere voice harboring a new emotion or maybe lack of one. “Or my kitchen,” he continues.

“Your kitchen? Do you cook? A stag like you, I would’ve assumed you to afford many maids and cooks,” I say, looking into the mask. I’m sure that the fortune it must’ve cost to make would’ve sent me to the slums.

“I can, but I prefer to make my own food. No one else would make it the way I prefer.”

I hum in understanding. “I see. I’m sure you are a wonderful cook.” He hums and nods his head.

“Would you like to find out, my knight?” My head whips around towards him, his words taking me by surprise.

“That’s impossible, stag. The masks.”

“We can eat with masks. Ask Alana for one which leaves the bottom half of your face open. We can meet again here, at the same time, tomorrow night. I will be wearing the same mask. If you do not wish to, then do not show up.” The stag looks within the crowd spotting a jester walking further into it, pushing a woman butterfly along as he laughs at her. “I’m afraid I must part. My hunger is only growing, and I must prepare dinner. I yearn to meet again, my knight.” The stag bows before making his exit, walking towards where the jester was previously, going after him. They must know each other, I conclude, watching as he leaves.

The festival was nearly closed, and the crowds had almost completely dissipated. Nearby, a bluejay waves goodbye to a woman in a pig mask. She began to trot over upon realizing my location. “Will, I’ve been looking for you. Where did you go?”

“Alana, I just went to get a drink. Who was that?” I walked over to meet her halfway.

“I don’t know, but she was nice. I wish I managed to get her name. Shall we be off?”

I nodded as she led me back to her abode. The building was in one of the many lantern-lit alleys. The walls only further reminded me of my home in Florence, causing an itch to form where the heart beats and the bones grow.

As we arrived inside, we stripped off our concealing attire. I laid my mask on the table and hung my coat on the coat rack. I studied her as she took off her costume. “Alana,” I hesitantly began, “could I attend alongside you again tomorrow night? Maybe in a mask that allows me better access to my mouth?”

Alana gave me a suspicious glance. “Oh? And what would you need it for? Don’t tell me you plan a night of pleasure for yourself tomorrow with some handsome lady?”

I felt my face tense as I turned towards the fireplace. I managed a quick shake of my head as I spoke, “No, no. Nothing of the sort. I just got hungry. It was difficult to get nourishment and quench my thirst with this mask; although, I do marvel at its beauty. It was just a little-“ I paused, trying to find the word, “suffocating.” would greatly appreciate a more appropriate mask.”

Alana nodded and went to her bedroom before coming out with a gorgeous mask in hand. It was detailed with a bone-white coloring and two things that looked like ears on the side of it. She handed it to me carefully. “I went to it as a lamb a few years back. It was…enjoyable. I hope you find the same outcome.”

I attempt to hand it back to her after feeling the hills of the lines and the cannons. “Surely you can hold onto it for me until morning.”Yet, she hands it right back.

“Keep it. You never know when you might need it.” She smirks and takes her stuff as she heads back into her bedroom. “You best be leaving for your inn. I hear that it will rain before morning.”

-

As I lay in my bed for the night, my mind kept trembling with restless moths of thoughts, crowding the lightbulb of my sanity. In the pitch of my room, my eyes kept trying to identify the white lamb mask on my dresser, but they were left to only imagine its curves and indents.

Eventually, I shut my eyes. My mind drifts off to the darker place it usually finds residence. The woods crackle and live soundly around me as I look past black, stretching trees. In it, I see a familiar suited man with a familiar black mask. He huffs as red coats his figure. A sickening cut is heard causing me to stumble on a branch, breaking it. He spins around to face me. The mask…isn’t a mask at all. It connects to its person, merging into an overwhelming beast. A black, tall, lanky stag-man stands before me covered in blood. He was something out of children’s horrific nightmares and warnings. It creeps towards me before offering a long, lanky hand. Its fingers were twisted like tree branches and as sickening as bloody organs.

“Would you care for a dance, my lamb in knight’s clothing?”

-

The next night I hesitated at the entrance. The sounds of laughter and enthusiasm were overwhelming to hear as he studied the grounds.

“Will? What’s wrong? You look nervous. You weren’t nervous last night.” Alana looks at me with a furrowed brow, rubbing her soft palms over my coat. I remember a time when I used to fawn over her touch, and frequently find my gaze drifting back to her, now I just enjoy the company.

“I didn’t- I didn’t have plans tonight. I may leave tonight without you.”

“You will?”

“I might,” I correct immediately. She raises a brow. “I’m ok.”

“You were just hyperventilating.”

“I’m- I will be ok.”

“Will, tell me what’s going on.”

I hesitate, glancing into the crowd, and catching sight of the barrels. They appear alone. A frown crosses my face without apparent reason.

“Will? Are you ok?” She takes ahold of my shoulder, trying to ground me.

“Yeah, yeah. I just-…I’ll be ok. I’ve got this. I’ll be seeing you.” I leave her standing aimless and confused as I make my way through the crowd towards the barrels.

Once I arrive, the place is lonely. Not a mask in sight, much to my dismay. I pour myself a glass of the liquid in the second barrel. My face scrunches in disgust at the taste of beer after assuming wine.

A hollow laugh erupts beside me, making me whip my head towards them. “I suppose the second barrel isn’t red wine tonight, is it?”

It was the stag. His appearance brings a smile to my face. “Stag.”

“My knight, I love tonight’s mask. A lamb, yes?” I nod. “It looks beautiful on you.”

I turn back to my drink, wishing the mask covered more of my lower face. “I believe you promised me dinner, Stag.”

“I did. How could I forget?” He offers me his arm. “Shall we be off? My home isn’t far from here.”

Hesitantly I link my arm around his, letting him lead me to his abode.

—

Test for ending:

Pain seared and burned like molten lava as the blade began to carve a slit into the folds of my skin, tainting them scarlet. The blade lifted for a moment before moving to the next area for an incision. My hands wrapped the wrist, stilling the knife as it pressed softly against my skin, eliciting a small bead of blood.

My eyes blur as I look past him… at him… the pitch, lanky figure carving me like dinner. “I see you,” I rasp, softly. My voice barely evolved to a whisper. The wind brushing branches against the panels of glass windows almost hid my speech.

My hand fell slowly as I watched the eyes above me. Crimson eyes studied mine as we held each other’s gaze. “I let you see me,” he corrected quietly. His voice hid an emotion buried deep like a skeleton in a ditch. If I believed that he cared about me any more than a random stranger picked as a victim, then I would've mistaken it for remorse or regret.

I felt as he fixed his grip on the blade, pressing it in again slightly. I didn't realize that it had faltered, previously. “I truly am sorry, William. You’ve been like no other…” He pauses for a moment, studying my eyes again, a new hunger filling them. “For you, I think that I'll eat your heart first.”

#nbc hannibal #hannigram #hannibal lecter #will graham #fanfic #hannibal crack #hannibal nbc #i don't know what this is #test fic #hannigram but make it during the carnival of venice #i need to research #i barely know shit about the carnival of venice #i barely slept last night #was on 1 hour of sleep while writing this #should i continue? #slasher #hannibal #hannibal fanfiction #hannigram fanfiction #i feel like im dying #Will fr #alana bloom #will graham fanfiction #hannibal fandom #im on the 2nd ep of season 3 rn so yeah #cask of amontillado #should I be adding that tag? I'm doing it anyways #fannibal #maybe I will post my other test fic on here later #I don't know how to write dialogue

[magentagalaxies]

very curious if our society (youtube) has evolved to producing twenty-four-hour length video essays yet. bc ik on average the video essays i watch tend to be around an hour, some shorter some longer but this is my preferred length, 2-3 hours is on the longer side for me but if it's a topic i'm into or a creator i like i'm down for it, longest i've personally watched is 5-ish hours (tho that one was broken up into a lot of smaller segments and not meant to be consumed in one sitting) but i know for a fact there are much longer video essays out there. the longest i've seen in my recommended is eleven hours but i know there must be more out there. what is the video essay event horizon? have we reached "videos of nerds (complimentary) infodumping about niche topics which would take an entire day nonstop to consume"

#yes i am a video essay enjoyer if you couldn't tell #longest video on my ''favorite video essays'' playlist is ''understanding snapewives'' by biz barclay which is just under 3 hours #(10/10 recommend even outside of the fandom history there's a lot of fascinating stuff about religion and how we connect to media) #(and it's very well researched) #i think the longest i've watched is babbity kate's deep dive into the american girl doll ''kirsten'' #which covered every piece of kirsten media ever created and analyzed the historical accuracy #kate's planning on doing a series like this for every american girl doll in release order which i'm excited for #i didn't even like kirsten as a kid but the video was very well done and engaging even if you're not as big of a doll fan as she is #longest i've had recommended to me is ''a brief retrospective of the simpsons' golden age'' which is ELEVEN HOURS #but i'm very tempted to watch it bc i am a simpsons nerd and it seems to be divided into smaller essays season by season #i think i saw a tumblr post about a fnaf lore video essay that was ridiculously long but idk if that was longer than 11 hours #i should also make a poll about preferred video essay length bc idk if my opinion is the majority #most of my favorites are 45 minutes to 1 hour 30 minutes. if it's too short (like less than 20 minutes) i'll skip it #(unless it's a creator i like who wanted to put out something short between big projects) #and if it's too long (over 3 hours) i have to be in the right mood even tho it'll probably be multiple sittings to finish it #(again unless it's a creator and topic i like and it's something i've been waiting to hear their thoughts on)

[mejomonster]

:/

I think about a query and a cover letter and how i need to look up what theyre called because i dont even know. Let alone know how to write them well and which things are required for what, and how i heard publishers only expect emails during calls for wubmissions so I dont know where to look for those but i also need to learn that from Somewhere i can learn such info. And how i know how to format a book for print, with mirrored margins and all the rest of that specific spacing stuff, but i have no idea the formatting requirements for a manuscript sent to a publisher (although hopefully that will be on their site as a style guide requirement directions and formatting IS something thankfully i'll be able to easily Look Up and Follow Directions to do). But the letter you send to pitch a novel and the length of manuscript expected (1 page? 1 chapter?) Or what kind of summary blurb they want, or if they want a summary or a "marketing blurb" that keeps some parts mysterious and enticing. And what's most frustrating, the reason i'm complaining, is when I look these things up the articles with advice do not say WHAT they are, basic requirements and basic expectations, it is IMPLIED the reader has as much familiarity with the definitions of these terms and when these items are needed as adults are expected to be familiar with job Resumes and standard Good Practice Format out of the gate. But with Resumes, high school and parents did provide some basic guideline directions and basic informafion like "include X, do not include Y, summarize Z" and "use keywords found in job description" and "keep it short such as one page or you may give a bad impression" and "do it in basic X fonts, basic colors, unless the job is particularly creative with unusual expectations of your resume" with similar directions about cover letters such as "state job you're applying for, summarize your education and some relevant experience, say you'd like the job and say why if you'd like, end with your contact information, keep it under a page ideally." I do not know the expected lengths of query letters, font expectations in the emails, if its an email or attachment, if it's submitted only during calls for submissions (i assume yes), how to find submission calls, what the title of the email should be, what the blurb length shpuld be and what it should Contain (summary? Marketing keywords? Your writing style or more technical key point information? Length/word count minimun and max? Should a summary be the whole main plot in a few key point sentences or be only the premise with the ending a mystery? Should it be entertainingly stylistic, or technical?) I look up requirements for publishing submissions and its so often expected the readers know what all these specific requirements and Norms in Writing them already are, so all the advice in the article is specialized like "you already KNOW what to submit, what the requirement is, now here's how to be Noticed Better." So it amounts to an equivalent to advice articles that do not state what a cover letter must contain or how to format it, but instead only focuses on specific ways of sounding more Convincing or Unique in your cover letter. Which is not super helpful if you... do not even know what a cover letter should contain to BE a correctly made cover letter to begin with.

#rant #what this amounts to is. im going to have to do a ton of research. which in theory is fine #but its so FRUSTRATING that its so hard to find basic information on WHAT DOCUMENTS ARE REQUIRED AND EXPECTED #AND WHAT THEY SHOULD CONTAIN AND HOW #like. i literally have looked up WHAT ARE THESE like for 20 hours this week #and about every 6 months i look it up and research for 20-40 hours for a month and just #i still have no fucking clue 1 #WHAT it is i specifically need to make for resume equivalents for submitting to publishers #2 what those documents should SPECIFICALLY contain and the formatting (in email? as attachment? title? summary or marketing plug? expected #keywords?) #because if i were a publishet yeah id simply THROW OUT submissions that do not contain the basic submission required documents #if the documebts werent included or were but contained totally irrelevant information and not the correct expected information #3 i cant find any guides that explain BASICALLY what the fuck all thid stuff is #i imagine maybe they teach ppl in college pursuing creative writing #but the articles im finding online are all skipping basic info. and basic info is what i need

[sydmarch]

spent months like I need prescription for my mental health give me prescription please please & now that I have it I'm like hm. do I want to have to take meds, actually

#part of it i think is just that typical anxiety that comes before any life change like s new job or whatever but also like #despite never having TRIED stimulants im familar w them i know people w adhd who are on them i had an idea of what to expect & thats what i #i figured id be getting but shes having me try this non stimulant option first bcus 1 apparently its good for people who also have anxiety #and 2 easier to get w the like Adderall shortages & shit rn #& im like ok i have NEVER heard of this drug before and didn't even know there WERE non stimulant options options. #like im doing all my research TODAY for the first time then pick it up tomorrow? #like me heslth anxiety girl just has to be like ok sure i guess. i had mentally prepared myself for stimulants & thats it!!! #i mean worst case i just try it & see if it works or if i have side effects but like. ugh. & i dont like that i dont like my np LOL like id #probably feel less uncertain about trying something i was previously unfamiliar with if she was someone i liked & trusted more #if i knew there were unfamilar drugs they might recommend to me i probably wouldve started over & found someone new to work with. AGHHH & i #didnt discuss any of this w her bcus it took me a couple hours after our session to think abt it & do my own reading & process my emotions #to really come to thia conclusion. & also i wouldnt have wanted to talk to hwt abt this anyway bcus i dont like her & have not felt at all #like cool w opening up to her beyond the minimum i had to do for the assessment #& my therapist is sick this week so im not gonna get to talk to her tomorrow!@ #texticles #anyway i know ive got fellow adhd bitches following me. anyone try guanfacine did you like it or nah

[quaranmine]

(Spoilers for the Fourth "Letters from the Outlook") Wait, so if Grian's hands are damaged, then does that mean he cannot go back to his drafting job anymore? What does he do instead when he does eventually regain some movement and dexterity to his hands?

I basically answered this in the chapter notes, which is just that I did not intend for him to have long-term damage that permanently affected his function in a massive way. That's why he has physical therapy and a compression garmet and in the scene he says his doctor is fairly confident it won't be forever. Yes, it will probably affect how fast he can go back to the job (but also his mental health is going to affect that too) and perhaps he'll have to rest his hands more often. But basically it wasn't my intention to keep him from being able to hold a pencil forever, so I don't see why he can't go back to drafting in a while. He just couldn't hold it during that still-fairly-early scene because he hadn't regained a lot of grip strength.

Also his days of drafting are numbered anyway—by the 90s, architects started to use AutoCAD for their work instead of manual drafting :)

#i hashtag believe in the power of physical therapy (and them starting PT immediately as soon as grian was healed enough) #when i had my knee in that brace i could not bend it at all when i got it out and within a month i had normal range of motion thanks to PT #some of this uncertainty about the burns and stuff can go back to the fact that i did not always plan to have grian go through the fire #there are versions of the plot up until me literally sitting down to write the scene that included him successfully running away #so when i finally took the leap and went 'no he HAS to go through the fire for it to 1) satisfy foreshadowing and 2) be realistic' #i then had to very quickly spend several hours researching burns because i hadn't researched it earlier and pivot where needed #so i didnt leave enough 'room' in the story to like. deeply and properly examine potential disability as an effect of the story #so i tried to find the middle ground of like. reasonable and realistic injury that ultimately has a good outcome #quara asks #hc_firewatch_au #like i'm not saying that i dislike the option of potential disability as a long term effect in this story i'm saying that i'd rather #be able to FULLY and properly explore the topic instead of tacking it on at the end? like oh yeah btw #and i just don't plan on doing an extension of the story like that. so. he has 2nd degree burns that will heal and just need PT

[kohakhearts]

cons of going to a “good schoolTM”: insane workload, unbearable classmates, next to no support when you have any kind of extenuating circumstances Including literal hospitalization, etc

pros of going to a “good schoolTM”: the 9-5 lifestyle is genuinely a major improvement

#taylor.txt #the extenuating circumstances point was not me btw. i know someone who had his degree delayed an entire year because of two weeks in psych #we’re in a co-op program or else maybe it wouldve just been one semester but. lol #i hate it here…i hate it #but hey…at least i have the world’s shittiest health insurance! #some of my classmates say they dont feel like working full-time is easier than going to school full-time but it so is #for me. anyway. even when i fumbled my time management bad on the field and make no mistake i was incredibly busy plus i chose a field #notorious for Unpaid Overtime and Taking Your Work Home. even then. it was still easier than this #i would never do undergrad again. i loved everything i learned. i took interesting and awesome classes #but i would never ever do it again. miserable overworked spent most of it friendless until i got on the field #i have a friend who keeps being like idk how you did 4 physics classes this sem and im like girl we are education students…thats an average #semester for a physics major. how must THEY feel #also i have to say just you know. generally. ive worked full-time while living with my parents #AND while living alone. and 50 hours a week was incredibly manageable in the former arrangement. i even wrote and edited an entire novel #in the beginning stages of a pandemic while working 50 hours a week of retail and fast food hell. 40 hours full-time with weekends off #while living alone though? thats hard. i still managed to go to the gym almost every day #currently? i cant get out of bed in the morning. i am putting in 12 hour days and then goinng to bed unable to sleep because im so stressed #i have dreams about school. tangentially theres a really good marxist poem i read last year about this phenomenon in workers #ANYWAY. i have just 8 more days 4 exams 1 research paper and video project #i think i can pass and then thats it. my next semester is hell but just because scheduling the actual classes will be easy #and then i get to go back on the field and actually want to wake up every day. lol #and 8 days from now i will have my christmas shopping done and my apartment will be clean and i will be a fanfic writing machine #also my friends and i booked a demolition room so im sure that will be beneficial kfldjfldndks

[comradecowplant]

so things are not going well with my new elderly socdem friend unfortunately.

#she said this RIGHT after talking about how bad yt misinfo is... which she followed up w SO I WAS WATCHING A YT DOC ABOUT WW2 & LEARNED THIS #youtube 'historians' are literally the most fascist breed of youtuber. avoid the vast majority like the plague lmao #i asked if the video was sourcing the hollow dahmer & the black book of communism & she didnt seem to know what those are lol #to her credit i told her straight up that she was incorrect & she at least faked being curious about doing more research but i am doubting #she also 'learned' that lenin killed trotsky lol get your propaganda right lenin was dead by then STALIN icepicked him <3 #anyway im making jokes bc the worst part was a different conversation where she spoke positively of israel #THAT'S gonna be the one to ruin our friendship. fuck you & your war tourist friend who fought in the 1960s landgrabs that youre now #telling me as if this is a cute story. nahhhh lmao i looked her straight in the eye & said i will NOT debate this #so she dropped it like the true enlightened centrist most socdem cowards are and i kept cleaning her house quietly #turns out You & Me We're the Only Ones Around Here Who Aren't Complete Fools was premature *kicks the poorly rendered gravel sadly* #shes otherwise a nice lady & i know i need to be more flexible in order to hopefully change ppls minds... #but also when people say awful & untrue things it makes me not want to talk to you 🤷‍♂️ srry 2 b a freak like that #also i know shes not transphobic but i havent sniffed her out well enough to know if shes safe to come out to #so its hours of misgendering (which isnt her fault she doesnt know) bc shes obsessed with neoliberal feminism and inappropriately brings #gender into conversations that it does not belong in #'did you know all the countries that handled covid best were ran by women?' 1) untrue 2) dont care finland still sucks #she also tried to tell me that european rich people learned to be nicer after the french rev & thats why europe is better than america... #girl shut up we learned how to be so good at racism and capitalism BECAUSE of europe. there is no such thing as a good rich person!!! #i pick my battles (genocide & anticommunist genocide revisionism) so i let her cook w that one & was not left convinced as you can imagine #ANYWAY rant about today's weird day done. gonna smoke weed & rim some skies 🥵 while listening to the Khrushchev Lied audiobook i found 😘

[connanro]

normal batfam authors: lmao i've never read a comic and i pray it will stay that way

me: i may be writing a crack fic but i am going to thoroughly research every character i use and create a comprehensive timeline taking into account all of the relevant crossover events and also check relevant current events for the date i'm setting the fic in as well as civilian technology to avoid anachronisms and i'm going to make a graph--

#i'm finally working on my magical girl!tim drake fic and am having a Whale of a time #conpost #fic stuff #batfam #dc #throwback to the time i spent two days researching interwar polish-german relations for one (1) scene in a 50k fic #and the time i spent hours learning about different artefact archiving systems so i could give a number to some artefacts mentioned briefly #and also the time i spent over an hour looking up common british vehicles and related terminology so i could accurately refer to a car #that was in a single paragraph of a fic #its the autism innit

[capyclub]

dude i am really going through it rn

#trying to wrap my head around all the things im stressed out about to make it make more sense to me and idk where to even start #i genuinely dont know how people do this. i get stressed and my instinct is to curl up in a ball and freeze. i dont understand how people c #can be getting 8 hours of sleep a day and go to school and study and still stay on top of everything outside of school #i applied to one (1) research program a few weeks ago and it dominated my entire week and i still havent caught up on lecture material #dude idk how to navigate the professional world im not cut out for this i wish i could go herd sheep in iceland #ramblings

[skitskatdacat63]

Vettonso x Similar Helmets

SV Germany 2012 x FA Monaco 2013: Gold & Dark Red

I think a lot about Vettonso and their mutual relationship witn gold. They're both golden boys, they're both seen lit gold by the sunshine on many podiums throughout the years, both have worn golden boots, and as you can see here: both have worn golden helmets. The parallels in these particular helmets makes me feel insane. Both are: gold with dark red accents, both have their birthplace's coat of arms(Bergstraße and Asturias), both have team animal motifs, and both have symbols to represent their two championships(You by now know the signifigance of the ones on Fernando's helmet, but I think the ones on Seb's are actually a callback to his Formula BMW days when he used to put the smiley stickers on his car for every win.)

And did you know both of these helmets were designed by the same helmet design company? Yep, both of these are JMD helmets. I know JMD helmets are/were pretty popular, but still, there's something to me about Fernando commissioning the same designer that Seb has been using since he was a literal child. Parallels, am I right?

SV Japan 2010 x FA Japan 2023: White with Black & Red

Haha I remember @protocolseben and I discussing this a bit back in September when Fernando's helmet dropped. I honestly think Seb is such an innovator and trailblazer in terms of helmet design, and you can see his influence in helmet design as recently as this past season. I'm not sure if he was the first ever driver to don a matte white helmet with red accents as a representation of the Japanese flag, but it certainly envoked him in my mind when I saw Fernando's!!

I think Fernando's is pretty similar to all of Seb's 2010-2012 Japan helmets but I like this one the most so! I think if Seb wasn't restrained by the Red Bull logo, he def wouldv'e put the red circle where Nando put his so I think Fernando did a really good job, even if unintentionally, at emulating Seb's sense of design.

SV Singapore 2012 x FA Singapore 2012: Sparkly!

Like I said in the one above, it's crazy how much Seb influenced helmet design. He was pretty much the pioneer of sparkly helmets for Singapore, right? It drives me absolutely insane that there's actually pictures of them together in such similar designed helmets. It's kinda funny actually that even though they're pretty deep in the championship fight at this point, and Seb just got one up on Fernando; Fernando is wearing a helmet that is a direct influence from Seb!!! Is that not insane???

Also, Fernando trying to be camp with trying the now in vogue sparkly Singapore helmet, and Seb accidentally completely blew him out of the water with his outrageous light up LED constellation helmet. But god yeah....to have pics of them in matching helmets from this era particuarly makes me emotional ;;;

SV Hungary 2021 x FA 2022: Pink with Dark Blue

I really could've picked any of Seb's 2021 helmets, but I thought this one matched the best with Fernando's main 2021 helmet(with the color pallet.) Also one thing, it's crazy how much control BWT has as a sponsor, I don't think I've ever seen another sponsor go so hard at having a chokehold on individuality. I like that we got pink liveries and pink helmets, but I don't think they should have that much control.

I'm almost kinda sad there wasn't any Miami GP in 2021, because I think that was the only unique helmet Fernando had in 2022. But these match pretty well! Pretty in pink!! It's crazy that their parallels in the 2020s are ongoing even before Fernando actually takes over Seb's seat. Thanks BWT I guess?

SV Abu Dhabi 2022 x FA Abu Dhabi 2022: Fernando's Seb Tribute Helmet

AND HERE WE HAVE THE PIÈCE DE RÉSISTANCE!!! The ultimate conclusion, it literally couldn't get better than this!! This is still unbelievable, like how is this an actual thing that happened!? Fernando intentionally branding his helmet, the only symbol of individuality in F1, with his rival's flag colors, HIS FLAG!!!!! Not to mention the literal "Vettono Best Moments" collage he posted alongside it....and the hand-holding....and everything that happened with them at Abu Dhabi 2022....

But god, after years of incidentally making parallel helmet designs, Fernando decided to officially tie the knot of the red string of fate, and make a helmet directly referencing Seb's. I think it's funny because as I said with two of the previously mentioned ones, those Fernando designs are pretty much inspired by Seb's, and here he is openly making one directly inspired by Seb. I don't really have words for how this actually makes me feel because it's just. Yeah. The most open and clear declaration of love and respect and admiration one could ever make. TO ME.

#all of my posts subheading should be: 'its probably not that deep BUT-' #i can't believe ive made two deeply researched and beloved posts in a row one day after the other #posts sponsored by: 12 am red bull consumption. my all-consuming devotion and love for vettonso. and my unwillingness to do schoolwork #i mean i felt a lot of emotions and had fun making it but like. hey. could you put this effort into school? #anyways feeling deeply emotionally affected about helmets and their symbolism #i think in the entirety of f1 seb and fernando are two of the most dedicated and passionate about helmet designs and symbolism? #so this post is very special to me :] helmet fuckers unite <3 #again: they say they aren't friends and don't share any hobbies and im just staring at them like YOU IDIOTS!!! #its just that spongebob meme of him pointing out the trashcans. like guys. be fr rn. you totally share hobbies #both like helmet design. paddel and pingpong. sustainability. cars. racing. european football. THE LIST GOES ON AND ON #well im glad they swapped helmets at some point(i think nando gave seb two pretty old ones as well. now thats dedication!) #if they werent cowards i bet they couldve also had a 5+ hour long discussion about helmet design ;;;;;; #thinking also about how fernando has one of seb's in his museum >:) but if only it were one of the ones on this list. sigh. #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion #well lmk if theres any other vettonso helmets you think are similar!!! im pretty blind to seb helmets that arent rbr era tbh #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #f1 #formula 1 #vettonso #we do a little bit of f1

[silentreigns]

Whenever I see people repost f1 content from here to Twitter, a part of me just wants spam the reposters with messages about getting permission. But I haven't done that too much because idk the gifmakers on here. Some people may be completely fine with reposting their work because the watermark. Honestly I don't wanna be a snitch, but I am seeing reposts of gifs with thousands of likes and nobody is saying anything over there. Which is WILD to me, like how did this become so normalized

#f1 #formula 1 #does this make sense? i don't want to be the center of attention when the situation doesn't involve me #but at the same time if i don't start calling people out they're going to just continue which is not right at all #tumblr is the backbone of the f1 community #I've learned so much about f1 on here as the content is easily accessible #and to see work that people researched / worked on for hours just to be reposted by someone who took 5 minutes to copy and paste is jarring

[violentdevotion]

I had multiple dreams last night.

I had a bf </3

someone in my family got bit by a zombie </3

some guy made me explain narrative structure to him </3

#ameera speaks #1 expanded) it was someone ik in real life 😔 which sucks soooo bad anyway he was at mine and we were watching a movie in my bed on my #laptop < (loser behaviour) and okay so im lying by referring to him as my bf bc we were just friends in the dream but then he started like #acting well intimate and i wasnt not into it so i was like hey whats going on here and we had a talk and then i had to sneak him out of my #house. dream 2) zombie apocalypse im in my room my nephews and nieces come in and i usher them out. the world is the samw just + zombies. #like think covid when it was dire but schools were still open? (my dream was a commentary on the countries failures to manage covid) so i #usher my neohews and nieces out and i make a comment to my sister in law like ooh im scared one of them got bit and my nephew was like some #girl bit me at school today and i told his mum and i stayed in my room and like an hour later i rang her like whats the update #and she was like oh yeah and came into my room to find my journal on zombie stuff and sge was like should i just cut off his arm and i was #idk try but if that doesnt work youre gonna have to... and she was SO CASUALLL !!!! and as she was leaving she started like picking things #up off the floor and i made a comment like your sons dying and youre sweeping and she was like way harsh tai and i woke up #that one was a commentsry on covid and also how i might be too mean to my sister in laws sometimes #3) i was in a library with friends researching smth and some asian guy sits on our table turns his back to us and talks to his friends. #then he starts playing music loudly from his phone and i move back to my table and as im walking he stops me and starts talking to some #girl on the table next to mine who he knows and is like hey i have an assignment due where i have to write a compelling narrative from my #own life ur clever can u help and she was a stem girly and went highschool with me and she pointed at me like ask her she does english #and he was like no u just tell me and she started helping him but i felt the advice she was giving was.. bad. so i interrupted like dont #you think that you should do __ instead and we had a discussion about it till i woke up. < that dream was a commentary on how useless my #degree is and how i wish it wasnt useless

[brown-little-robin]

going to visit parents & adopted uncle & aunt for the weekend. is this a wise decision, given how much work I have to do? NO. Will it be good to see them? YES.

#meanwhile: #fighting the urge to tell my mentoring research professor 'no thoughts head empty' #I'm working on transcripts for some interviews she has done #and she wants me to share my thoughts about what I'm hearing at the next meeting #but I Have No Thoughts y'all... I am too tired #We Have Said Everything Before. I Have Nothing To Add. Also I'm only 15 minutes into the first transcript b/c cleaning up the captions #is really time consuming work #I'm gonna be SO BUSY for the next. week. #2 papers to write. 8 discussion posts to make. & only a few hours to do it in #hnnnng #I almost think I should delay it by a week #just because next week I will have far less to do #I have this awful habit of delaying my actual decisions till the last minute. I need to stop doing this. #how horrible would it be to delay my monthly visit by 1 week at the very last second

[chronal-anomaly]

I have a lot of muse tonight, so like this for a lil ic ask

#( ooc. ) #I think just being back outside working really helps my muse #Because there's nothing to really think about for 10 hours a day when you're just doing manual labor #Compared to something like school or research where I use 130% of my brainpower just to complete 1 assignment so #I have to sleep soon since my body is SORE but I wanna get at least a few things done beforehand #might be a long thing might be a meme who knows