#CAN I LEARN THINGS AND ALSO HAVE A JOB AT THE SAME TIME

[nicksbestie]

Kittens (part two) - M. Sturniolo

READ PART ONE FIRST!! YOU CAN READ IT HERE!

Summary : One specific person becomes a regular at the animal shelter you work at, always visiting the cats <3

Warnings : mentions of anxiety but nothing graphic!

Word Count : 1146

Pairing : Matt Sturniolo/Reader

A/N : part two!! this won't become a series but i felt it deserved a little more!! it's written in a later time, a epilogue scene, if you will!

The cats being in a different room that day had been one of the best things to ever happen to you.

You hadn’t known it at the time, but that conversation with Matt, starting by leading him to a separate room, had blossomed into a relationship. Matt had started coming back every day, coming up with stupid reasons to talk to you, claiming he needed help finding a cat that had run away, only for the cat to walk right out from under the tower when Matt walked back in, but you let him do it every time. You felt like you couldn’t resist the opportunity to spend time with him, and if you weren’t busy, why should you?

He spent hours there every day, which made you wonder what he did for work, because how could he afford to not be at his job? After a couple of days where he came in one after another, you finally asked. It felt like a fair question because he clearly knew where you worked, so it was an eye for an eye, or something like that. He told you he did content creation with his brothers, and you looked him up later that evening, eyes nearly popping out of your head when you noticed just how famous they were. You weren’t someone who lived in the dark, but you didn’t keep up with every new thing going on, so there were a ton of famous people you didn’t know about. 

You weren’t going to lie, you stalked him that night. One thing hit you like a truck when you noticed it, though. Matt had told you that he came into the shelter when his anxiety was getting bad, and he had been coming in every Wednesday and Friday per week, and as you scrolled through their shared YouTube, you noticed that’s when videos were posted. You wondered how much he enjoyed his job, or if he did it because it made good money, or if the posting just really got to him because he worried about what people would think. Later you would ask, and you would learn that the latter was the reason, and that he really did love his job, it just got to him sometimes, knowing that so many people would pick apart everything he had done or said in a video. 

After about two weeks of him coming back to the shelter every single day, talking to you whenever he could, he finally asked for your number. He waited until you were off of the clock, making sure that he could never be accused of being unprofessional by anyone. He waited until the shelter closed, like normal, and you thought he had left, but he waited until you both stepped outside, and the door was locked, and then he asked. You let him have it with no complaints, and he texted you for the first time as soon as he got home, asking if you had also made it home safe. You responded much quicker than you would like to admit, letting him know you were home and safe. 

He would text you before he would come into the shelter, letting you know that he was on the way, and you two became incredibly close. Hanging out outside of work, spending time while he was at the shelter, if you were in the same vicinity, you were practically attached at the hip. You met his brothers, and they were so different from him that it was refreshing. You loved how they all got along so well, and even their banter in videos wasn’t coming from a true point of anger, but all lighthearted. You watched every video as they got posted, and sometimes all four of you hung out together before or after filming. You loved being in their company, and you had found a wonderful friend in Matt, but you had no idea that it would eventually become more than that. 

You’d hung out so much on your own, you knew you two worked together, you both knew that the other was attractive, you both knew that you liked the other. But you had no idea that it would eventually end up working out. Nick and Chris knew as well, being able to see it in the way that you interacted with each other. They kept it to themselves, allowing you two to navigate the developments of your relationship with each other by yourselves, but both of them were hoping that you would just get your head out of your ass already and get together. Matt was the first one to say anything. 

You knew he found love gestures sweet, you’d seen that in a video, and you’d seen it in the way that he interacted with people he loved platonically, being a gift giver, but when he showed up at your door with flowers, you were still in shock. He’d stayed the night that evening, soaking in the fact that the person he felt so strongly for had the same feelings for him. It had only snowballed in the best possible way from there. You did everything together, you went everywhere together, and sometimes that could cause codependency problems, but you were lucky to not have to deal with that. You were used to him leaving for a couple of hours to film, but he always came back as quickly as possible. 

It was refreshing for Matt to fall in love with someone who didn’t love him for the numbers, for the following, for the money, for the fame. This was someone who saw him off guard, who actually loved him for the person he was off of the camera, for all of the good in him and all of the bad. He wasn’t sure that he would ever find someone like this due to his popularity across the Internet, but he never took you for granted, not for a single moment. And those were the words that spilled out from between his lips, when he was knelt in front of you, ring box in hand, just three amazing years later, and the same ones that he would repeat at the altar six months after that. 

You didn’t work at the animal shelter anymore, but you and Matt were regular visitors and volunteers. Some of the people that you used to work with were still there, and shortly after you were wed, you picked out a kitten together, from the same Cat Cottages that Matt used to sit in for hours every week. Glancing over at the man you’d fallen in love with, sitting on the couch with the now one year old black cat in his lap, you knew that had been the best job you would ever work, and it brought you something much more rewarding than the money.

taglist : @blahbel668 @mattsgirlfrieeend @69isabella69 @mayhem-72 @iculdstealurgf @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 @sturnioloslife @heartsforkarina @nervousrebelglitter @sturniclo @elliegrace-7 @mattsturnioloisbae @strnilo @dazsha19 @patscorner @hailee22sstuff @tworosesblackthorn @h3arts4harry @getosuckers @knhxa @scoobydoosnack @tapesmatts @st7rnioioss @st7rnioiossblog @jamiesturniolo @sofie-1

~ if you'd like to be added to my taglist, click here!

~ my inbox is open, come chat!!

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #matt #matt sturniolo x you #matthew sturniolo smut #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo smut #matt x y/n #matt x reader #matthew sturniolo headcannons #matthew sturniolo x y/n #matthew sturniolo oneshot #matthew sturniolo fanfic #matthew sturniolo imagine #matthew bernard sturniolo #matthew sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo x you

[fvcking-fae]

Continuation/Part 2 of the Alien Scientists x Abducted Human

Here’s part 1

(CW; Reader is a female)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You’re woken up softly by the lights slowly turning from dim to bright and the alien you’ve grown to recognize steps into your room (more like a weird hospital room) with a few supplies on a hovering cart. He says nothing as he replaces your empty nutritional iv bag that’s hooked up to your arm with a full one. You still can’t quite tell his emotions because of his “odd” face. No wrinkles, no facial hair including eyebrows and lashes. Only dark grey skin and… freckles?

He finally meets your eyes and you look away.

“How are you? I’ve learned from another human that your kind don’t always prefer being nude. Would you like me to bring you a robe of some kind?”

You nod. “But also…” You surprised yourself by speaking up.

“Also?”

“If possible… I’d like some kind of entertainment. Like books, or movies- film,” You corrected yourself, not knowing if they would understand “movies”. “Or I don’t know if you have internet.”

“We do a lot of reading. But because we spend so much time researching other galaxies and universes, we don’t particularly have… interest in film. That’s not to say I can’t get you access to a television and a variety of films and television programs. And yes, “internet”. We call it something else and use it for different purposes but they’re the same basic thing. I’ll also get you access to earth internet since ours would be useless to you.” He spoke and explained all while adjusting your nutrition and monitors. He looked at you again. “Anything else while I’m here?”

“Um…” Your mind wandered. There was no use asking for food since they had you hooked up to those bags all the time and the other “needs” you had were being experimented regularly, but still.

“Could I… use that thing again?” You shyly pointed to the machine with the alien penis that pumped into you last time. You grew more comfortable asking about it since you knew he was a scientist and wasn’t exactly attracted to you. Just doing a job.

He looked over at it and smirked. “You’re asking this time. Interesting. Are you one of the humans I’ve heard of that’s “hyper sexual”?”

You felt yourself blush and shrugged.

“Hmm. I suppose I could let you use it for fun. Would you mind if we observed you while you use it?”

“I guess not… what’s the research for?” Now that you’re actually thinking about it, you’re curious.

“Well, we’ve found that the female human body is the perfect incubator besides our artificial ones. We prefer an organic incubator so we use humans.”

“You can’t carry the… fetus? Eggs?”

“Eggs. Usually two.”

“Your females can’t carry them?”

He was silent and sighed. “If I went into any more detail, I’m afraid it would upset you. But what I can say is, our research shows that if we use copious amounts of pleasure instead of all the needles and things that earth births require, humans tend to carry healthier eggs and deliver them with less pain.”

You nodded as if you really understood everything he said.

“I promise you it’s not worth your human mind to think about. Just know that your species is not being harmed or genuinely affected by our actions. And that you’re safe. You personally won’t be used as an incubator. Especially if you ask not to be.”

“Wouldn’t you just use that aphrodisiac on me again and change my mind?”

“I could…” He looked at you seriously. “But I won’t. That is exclusively used for human pleasure.” He stepped away from your health monitors and touched the restraints hanging from your bed. “That said, do you still want to use the machine?”

#L writes #monster fucker #monster fucking #monster kink #monster lover #teratophillia #terato #exophile #exophilia #alien kink

[ladypeonies]

"Acting is a dangerous profession."

credit.

Some people will watch this extract and just brush if off perhaps as fanservice and miss the point completely. What I like about Chris and Xuan it’s how candid and honest they are about the whole process.

The host says it all, “acting is a dangerous profession,” and both actors agreed. She’s right. So many fans don’t get it, and they focus on the superficial. It’s not just a dangerous profession in Asia. In my opinion it’s more challenging there because most of entertainment industries in Asia rely a lot on Method acting and immersion. You have notice how they call themselves by their character names, on and off set and it has several purposes. I won’t dwell on them here because this post would be too long.

And you have method acting which I have several issues with. It’s basically psychology. I’m not going to write an essay on it here, it basically means one can convince themselves of anything and you can become anyone you want. It’s becoming someone else entirely for a time, by changing your habits based on your environment. You study a character and become them, by assuming their point of view, mannerism, state of mind etc. If they drink you start drinking, if they love someone you love them too etc. Some actors are strongly against method acting for a reason and stick to use their imagination which is way safer. In a live Xuan talked about how physically and mentally it impacted him.

You are still yourself but you can’t escape your character, their emotions bleeds into you. And you use it to play the best version of them by using your body. Of course, Xuan fell in love with his co-star and had all those “evil” thoughts. He learned to fall in love with him and make him the centre of his universe. The preparation for the role, to build a bond took longer than the whole filming.

So, any actor in their shoes will feel the same, if they say no well, they are either lying or just bad method actors, that’s it, no in between.

The trick is to use those emotions while filming and then to be able to let them go. And that’s the issue, because for many it takes time to do so and get rid of them. Notice how Xuan doesn’t say while they were filming NC scenes he had evil thoughts but he was sitting there, so before or even after. The thing is if you hold on to those emotions it can hurt your mental health. They can be addictive. Under those circumstances sometimes there is a co-pendency which appear between actors. I remember an actor explaining how he basically went through a heartbreak because he got attached to his co-star who was engaged to someone else and he was full of emotions for his on-screen partner. And those emotions weren’t there before they started filming. And they knew each other, they were friends before and he never felt that way about them. And his mind knew they weren’t a good match but he kept longing for them.

I talked here about the bubble actors found themselves in. And the best remedy to get rid of those feelings, thoughts are a healthy distance, and being back to oneself. I hear often, “they’re just acting, it’s their job…” etc. Actors aren’t robot. There is a process to play a role and they all have a process to get out of a particular challenging role. Obviously, all roles aren’t the same.

Another thing: Chris and Xuan are friends and were friends but under the circumstances, they don’t have the same friendship they had before filming, the one from a year or two years ago. Friendship 101 had specific boundaries, and now there are new ones in friendship 201. It’s not possible to know the taste of your friend’s mouth, their skin, and be in the same exact friendship. Actors are not robots there isn’t a reset button. Now there is a new set of boundaries. Perhaps before there wasn’t any skinship now because there are use to each other touch, there is more skinship. Before they wouldn’t talk about certain subject, now they can. I believe they gain and also lost some things. The only possibility MAYBE to go back to friendship 101 would be a complete separation for weeks, reset. But it’s not happening because there are promotions and also, you get use to seeing each other all the time, I guess.

Now method acting and falling in love, it happens of course, but has to go through the test of time and distance.

One has a girlfriend/boyfriend and start method acting with a co-star LOL. 9 out 10 people will break up with their significant other, the GF or BF will leave, it happens all the time.

PS1: I also took the opportunity to answer a couple of asks.

PS2 :Translation by Wava please be kind to your translators and grateful for the work they do, I personally hate translating it can be so taxing.

#unknown the series #unknown bl #chris chiu #kurt huang

[elwenyere]

What are some Cody-related headcanons you have? If you'd like to share 🙏

Hello Anon! Thank you so much for this wonderful ask. Cody is one of my favorite characters to write, and it's a joy to share some of the ideas and inventions that have come out of building stories for him.

I think one thing that's become crucial to the way I imagine Cody is that he's been thrust into this extremely high-responsibility, heavy-emotional-toll position at a super young age, and he's had to learn how to compartmentalize and repress pretty aggressively in order to keep doing his job. There are losses he just can't let himself fully acknowledge if he's going to remain functional (and he's very good at his job, so there will be more losses if he can't function), so I think of there being a distance - both deliberately cultivated and unconsciously formed - between what Cody's feeling and what he's saying, or even what he's thinking about consciously enough for it to surface in the narrative focalization.

That means that I see Cody as a character with an incredible strength of will and power of self-denial, but I also like to think about the small ways he might allow himself to blow off steam, and I imagine a lot of them would be sensory: extra spice in the food, a little flavored creamer in the caff, the ritual of smoking a cigarette, or of having sex - especially with someone with whom he's on the kind of footing that allows for eye rolling and shit-giving.

On that note, I also think of Cody as someone who derives satisfaction from solitude (which he hardly ever gets) and is maybe too good at bearing loneliness (which he gets more and more of as the war goes on). He has a fierce loyalty to his men, and he also has to order them to their deaths all the time. He understands that means he can't share the same kind of camaraderie with them that they share with each other. So he holds himself apart: someone many people respect, some resent, and few really know. But as isolated as that might make him feel, he's also got barely any time that he can truly call his own, so I imagine that maybe in a no-chip/Republic-wins AU he might decide to peace out for a while: go live by himself and do things that are low-stakes and build some habits that are totally his own.

I think he's so used to using anger - a kind of low-simmering, deeply saturating, furious indignation - as a substitute for fulfillment that he barely notices how much of his emotional apparatus is coated in frustration until he's struck by something that reopens the yearning - the curiosity and thirst and restlessness - that not even the brutal grind of being Marshal Commander of the Third Systems Army can crush out of him.

Also he's funny and he's sharp: that's important to me. Cody can absolutely read you for filth while sounding unremarkably polite, and you won't realize he's verbally shivved you until you're on the turbolift leaving the meeting.

Thank you again for this lovely ask, Anon!!! I hope this is close to what you had in mind by headcanon. <3<3<3

#star wars #commander cody #anon asks #thank you anon!!! #this was lovely to write

[fanficshiddles]

The Redbridge Hunts, Chapter 51

‘I did it because having you alive and hating me, is better than not having you alive at all.’

Claire’s heart broke at hearing Chris’ words. Judging by the look on Loki’s face, she had a feeling that his heart did too…

Loki said nothing at first, his mouth was open in shock at Chris’ admission.

‘You… you knew I didn’t want to be turned.’ Loki said gruffly.

‘You were dying in my arms, Loki. I loved you, so much. More than anyone else. When I first held you as a baby, I knew I’d do anything for my little brother. I was not about to just let you die.’ Chris yelled at Loki and turned away, his back to them.

Loki looked down, Claire saw the pained expression on his face.

‘If you just stopped killing innocent people, like dad did. You terrified me that day.’ Loki said quietly.

Chris turned around. ‘It’s not that easy. I’m addicted to the feeling I get when my victims are scared, the rush of power and the taste of their blood, it’s fresher and rich, I can’t help it. You’ve never been able to accept it, but I don’t care.’ Chris growled low.

Loki pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. ‘I get it, Claire’s blood is the most delicious thing in the world, but I can control myself. I can stop without killing her. You could too, you don’t need to kill them after!’

‘I don’t care about them. Their lives are just fleeting in comparison to us, it will happen sooner or later. Whether I’m here or not. Vampires will overtake.’

‘Would you say that if your soulmate turns out to be human?’ Claire asked.

Chris glared at her. ‘I don’t have a soulmate.’

‘You do, somewhere.’ Loki said. 'Every vampire has a soulmate.'

‘I’ve been to every single town and city in the world, spent weeks at each place, searched in clubs, bars, restaurants, everywhere. A soulmate for me doesn’t exist.’ Chris snarled, though his voice broke a little near the end.

‘Tell Loki what you told me about your job.’ Claire said softly.

Chris clenched his jaw and narrowed his eyes at Claire, then he looked at Loki with a sigh. He put his hands on his hips.

‘Fine. You want the truth? Look, I’m sorry for kidnapping Claire. For trying to hurt you. I was jealous when Claire first came along, that your soulmate literally just walked right into your life when I’ve spent centuries searching for mine. Then when dad told us about the school board wanting you to have my job, I snapped. I love that job, I love my students, vampires and humans. Seeing them thrive and grow, getting excited for being accepted into Universities or Colleges that they applied for, getting jobs that they’ve dreamed of. Helping the young vampires work their way through their first few years where their instincts are at their strongest. The thought of it all being taken away… especially by you, just made me see red. You’ve got everything I want, but you wouldn’t have if I didn’t turn you. Being a vampire isn’t so bad, is it? Better than being dead, surely? Yet you’ve never forgiven me for making that decision, to save my little brother in the only way possible.’

It was then Loki’s turn to get emotional. Claire saw the realisation wash over Loki’s face, his eyes began to water as he stepped backwards until he was leant against the table for support.

‘I… I didn’t realise you’d been searching for your soulmate. I also didn’t realise how much it affected you when I was hit by the car… I’ve been a fool… You’re not wrong, being a vampire is better than death. I just… I just didn’t see it at the time and was so angry and scared at the same time, it clouded my judgement. I’m… sorry, for not being thankful that you saved me. For not ever listening or giving you a chance.

I looked up to you so much, Chris. As my big brother. You were always there for me, looking out for me. When I was told about you and dad being vampires, I was crushed. Though I did come round to the idea, when dad explained about the blood bank… but then I learned that you didn’t agree with it. I was scared of you, the way you just drank from humans and killed them without care. That was a side to you I had never seen, didn’t want to see. I didn’t want to become like that, so when you turned me, I was terrified about doing the same. I've got your blood literally running through my veins, not just as brothers.'

Chris eyes widened a little at Loki’s words, his stance softened and he wasn’t quite as guarded anymore. ‘Scaring you was the last thing I wanted to do, I never wanted you to see me like that… I didn’t even want to tell you about us being vampires but dad was insistent about telling you the truth. That’s why my relationship with him dwindled even more, he just went ahead and told you anyway. I was scared of it causing a rift between us, and rightfully so. That’s exactly what happened.’

‘I would have found out sooner or later. I was beginning to wonder why you and dad never aged.’ Loki sighed and paused for a second. ‘I don’t want to take your job. You didn’t listen to me when dad told us. You are good at it, I know that. I was all for telling the board I didn’t want it and that you should remain the head teacher, until you went nuts and tried to kill me. That’s the first time I’ve genuinely thought you were actually attempting to murder me.’

Chris looked down. ‘I know. I’m ashamed to admit that I think I was, I just saw blind rage. I can’t excuse it.’ He shrugged and looked back up at Loki. ‘I can’t change who or what I am. But part of who I am, still cares and loves his little brother. Always has done. Always will. Even it that means being hated, at least you’re alive.’

Loki and Chris stared at one another for what felt like the longest time. Then, eventually, Loki stood up straight and walked towards him, Chris wasn’t sure what he was about to do at first. Though Loki opened his arms and hugged him tightly. Chris was frozen on the spot for a minute, his brain took some time to process what was going on.

Though the moment Chris put his arms around Loki in return, both of them instantly felt a relief of sorts, the love and bond they once had when Loki was younger came flooding back. All the good times and memories.

When they let go from the longest hug, they both had watery eyes. Though as they both took a step backwards, Claire was sat on the chair at the side, in floods of tears at the scene. They both turned their heads to look at her and chuckled.

‘You guys… That was… so beautiful.’ She sobbed and pulled her cloak round to wipe her eyes.

Chris rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. ‘Well… I’m away to go back to the hunt before it’s all over. I’m sorry, Claire. For kidnapping you and scaring you.’

Claire stood and walked over to Loki, still wiping her eyes. ‘I… I understand why you did. Though not to say it wasn’t scary at the start, but I’m glad that something good has come out of it in the end.’

Loki nodded in agreement, he put his arm around Claire tightly and kissed the top of her head.

‘Though if you ever hurt or kidnap her again, brother or not, I’ll beat the shit out of you.’ Loki growled at Chris.

Chris smirked and as he walked by, he patted Loki on the shoulder. ‘Sure you will, lil bro.’

Loki felt a strange sensation in his heart. It had been a long time since Chris called him that, he used to always use that nickname for him. It made him smile a little as Chris headed out the door and took off.

Claire wrapped her arms around Loki’s waist and hugged him tightly. Loki pressed his face into her hair and he breathed in deeply.

‘Let’s get you home.’ He hummed and squeezed her tightly.

#tom hiddleston #loki #loki x ofc #loki fic #the redbridge hunts #chris motionless #vampire loki

[gottagobuycheese]

Just 6-10 weeks and I’ll be able to taste a little freedom again...just gotta hold out until March/April......

#why did I pick one of the few professions that will give me tests and homework for the rest of my life #I hate tests and homework that was one of my least favorite parts of school #I miss drawing I miss reading I miss writing I miss Doing Literally Anything Else But This #(to clarify: I have not actually DONE any This but I have spent plenty of time dreading it) #Cheese's personal molasses #Cheese evaporates about...job?? #would LOVE to be able to just. sit down and Focus. #can I truly live my own life independently? #can I respond to emails in a timely fashion and complete my daily notes on time without someone else also sitting down and doing their work? #can I study for an exam without a study buddy?? without the promise of watching my brother play Spider-Man (PS4) after 10 PM???? #CAN I LEARN THINGS AND ALSO HAVE A JOB AT THE SAME TIME #asking the real questions here #imagine being able to multitask #I want to cook Real Food but unfortunately I have an email to respond to which is mutually exclusive to that #can only do one of these two things #oh and also studying #I'll need to take a practice test at some point but ughhhhh I don't want to know how far away I am from passing #I also don't know when I'm going to have like...9 free hours to take a single half of a test lmao #ANYWAY ENOUGH DREADING #I'LL AT LEAST FINISH THURSDAY'S OVERDUE NOTES/HOMEWORK AND THEN WHEN I GET HOME FINISH FRIDAY'S #and then...I don't even know there's nothing else I want to do right now except Not This lol

[curiosity-killed]

it feels a little silly to be so happy about something that, currently, just amounts to some free dance classes but I really, genuinely am just so joyful about getting this traineeship

#like #tbh it turns out i don't actually care that much about getting paid #when i a) have a solid full time job #and b) now can save like $54-60/week #(and also am being paid double that by the same org to teach?) #and most importantly get to dance and grow #idk i think i have had so many times in my life #where i've either seen the limit of dance in my life or hit it #from doctors telling me i couldn't dance anymore to the y'know #general crushing weight of Growing Up and Getting a Real Job #and now i'm not like. a Full Time Contracted Company Dancer the way i dreamed #but i'm part of the company and get to keep growing and learning and dancing #AND i get to have all the rest of my multifaceted life along with it #like shit dude #there was never a point in my life where i thought i could have all of this #a job that (while sometimes frustrating and stressful) lets me work on cool things that matter to me #and pays enough i can do all the things i love #and dancing ~professionally with people i rlly like and respect #and the art! and the music! #and the friends! and life in a city i've loved since i was 10 years old #i am feeling very grateful and joyful and also a little bit overwhelmed #personal

[choilproductions]

3am doodle page

(Plus sopping wet vent in tags read at your own risk)

#ive never been more proud of myself than i have been learning art the last couple of years #and i want to do it much more and possibly make it full time #but im scared to commit because of quitting my job and i think i want to do too mucj #theres alot of things i wanna do songwriting animating story writing directing designing things blah blah #and i think my vision is too unfocused to fully commit cuz it doesnt have a solid plan #at the same time i cannot stand my job i have no time for anything i feel like i have no real connections because of it im reaching my limit #i wanna be a real artist and i know its about risks but im terribly afraid of the risks like i have been my entire life i guess #bleraugh #if you read all that thank youre hot #if youre also following youre cool and hot #im very thankful people like my art and tings #i hope i can keep it up #ok goodbye

[icewindandboringhorror]

oh my god.. a job for me.. historical pierrot beach performer lol

#also I'm obsessed with shows like this #I always forget about like 'people live in a fully historical way as a sort of half documentary half educational reality-tv ish thing' as #a genre but then every once in a while I remember and watch something like this and am so enamored #There was also one called 'manor house' or something where it was like normal people who aren't actually historians or anything #trying to live like how they did a while ago in some big manor or whatever which was interesting #not the drama really (there wasnt much but a few of the people on there were kind of annoying whenever they did get their #few little interview bits among the otherwise mostly explanatory nature of the show just focusing on how things #worked in mainatining a giant manor house) #though there's a lot of focus on edwardian and victorian times in these sorts of things. which is cool! #but I wonder if they have them for different time periods too. and different locations. what about 1500s france #1250s china. etc. etc. I dont know because like I said I always forget I like this type of stuff so I never look it up #omg.... guess what... (whispering to you as if we're friends and I'm gosspiing).. you will NEVER believe this.. #you know 'Edwardian Farm' right? well.. I just found........ 'VICTORIAN farm'! #it's literally the same people doing the same thing but a different time period. And you know what? I will still eagerly watch every moment #ghbhj.. They could do 'Victorian Farm 2' 'Victorian Farm 3: Yet Another Show About The Same Stuff' and I would watch them all #ANYWAY.. also I feel like that could be my niche. Like because I'm Very Mentally Ill And Have Very Much Problems and have difficulty managi #ng ''normal'' jobs. But I LOVE menial repetitive tasks epsecially ones I can do with my hands. Like I could peel carrots for hours. I love #sculpting. etc. If I were ever in a position to learn a historical trade I think that could be My Thing. on these shows they always have li #ke 'The One Single Guy In The Entirety Of England Who Still Weaves Baskets Like They Did In Shropshire In 1805' or whatever and they #call him on the show and he's like 'yeah this basket took me 16 hours to make and here's how I do it' and it's like.. god.. I could be that #guy.. Like old style jewelry making. shoe making. all of these little tedious tasks to do crafting sorts of things. #It's just that like... when am I ever going to be in a position to LEARN that? You'd have to know someone who already does it #and be like tutored by them or etc. Which my social issues are a barrier gghhj.. and lack of resources/money to buy supplies. etc #but.. THEORETICALLY.. the dream.. ANYWAY ghhjhj.. I've been very busy all week but will try to do new poll adventure and other #stuff soon. I've had like two appointments and More Things Than Usual so just.. zero social media posting energy whatsoever #I do HAVE posts though.. pictures.. cat things.. costumes.. polls.. it's just.. brain says I have to lay on the floor all day instead #but at least I can ponder the absolute glee of a theoretical life where I am That One Guy in england who can make old ass gloves or etc. #If anyone in the UK has a dying grandpa with a near-extinct skill and YOU yourself don't feel like picking up the trade to pass it to young #er generations.. hmu and help me get citizenship and I will do it for you. even if he's evil and mean. I will MAKE those shoes

[sakuhina]

i have a driving license exam tomorrow and am not ready at all

#i failed like 4 times already i hate it i know the things but i can't pass no matter what #this sucks man!!! 😂😂😂 #idk if other countries its the same but here you can only pass with only 3 wrong and i always go with 4 or 6 wrong it sucks man!!! #maybe its a sign i should give up #but mom would be disappointed :( #there's also a thing that happened where in my old job my boss wouldn't let me be absent so i didn't have classes for almost a whole year #before doing the exams so maybe that's one of the reasons who knows #maybe i'm just too smart for the code and they can't handle my brain #😌 #also i didn't want to learn how to drive it was my uncle randomly one day was like come to this school and lets see what you think #and then just signed me up without asking me or my mom lmao so it's not all on me.. #my mom also has trauma from driving bc my dad would always yell at her when driving so she hasnt drived for almost 30 years #so obviously she wants me to learn to not be stuck with public transportion #but alas #m.text

[girlvinland]

I saw a comment on a post that was like “I can’t believe people over 30 use this app!!!” and I’m like 🤔 ???

#by bug #not trying to be like ‘kids these days arrrr’ #idk it’s just funny like most of us have been here from 2012 or maybe even earlier it feels like #this should be one of the least surprising things #considering it feels like a very millenial website at times #it’s just kinda been here for a while sorta like reddit #also you guys gotta remember like. people who are 30+ grew up with internet too? we aren’t like. boomers?? #it’s weird lmao #i know it’s kind of crazy I can operate a computer and a phone and even discord #also tbh a lot of older ppl these days like 50+ can be proficient with technology esp when so many jobs require that #maybe it’s harder for them to learn some things bc it changes so fast and they DIDNT grow up with it the same way #but it’s not like everyone is mom looking at phone like winnie the pooh meme

[cinnabeat]

i really like my seminar class tbh like i didnt think a class where i had to do readings every week and then discuss them as a class was gonna be enjoyable but im a fool if i thought discussing anything even vaguely literary was not gonna be my favorite thing in the world

#the readings every week are annoying especially bc sometimes i just dont have time/dont feel like doing it #but the readings are interesting and relatively small bites and its nice to discuss other peoples thought processess #and also criticize how it was written bc not a day goes by where im not being a hater abt something #and its just really interesting to discuss things like this like its making me actually interested in art history #or at least past art movements which is kind of the same thing but not really #idk what my past art history classes were doing but i wish it was more like this #maybe bc it was more like actual history (and architecture genuienly my least fave thing) instead of more art focused? #you cant separate history from art but like. theres only so many times you can go through the roman fucking empire man #that 19tg century photography class i took was genuienly the most interesting art history class i took and it was such a shame that it was o #on zoom if only bc it presents a barrier for genuine discussion #but otherwise i learned so much lmao #but going thru artists artist statements and interviews is really interesting in getting that actual real time perspective of art and the #movements that came from the time periods #its just a shame i dont know the art movements very well off the top of my head otherwise itd be a more worthwhile class #i mean its already worthwhile but its a little hard to understand when we start discussing movements as a whole but it doesnt deteact too mu #much #anyways #was talking to my brother abt the art critic thing and his response was basically yeah you WOULD do well with a job that requires you to cri #criticize #he knows me so well lmao <3 #michi tag

[be-good-to-bugs]

the world isnt so bad

#the bin #i think ill be ok one day #i feel like i need to change a lot of my lofe and relationships for that to happen but ill do it and ill be better for it and ill be ok #i feel like the big thing thats been fucking me uo these past years besides not having friends is my sister #i just. dont like her. shes mean and unpleasant to be around. she seems fine if u only spend a little time around her but shes so negative #and its not enougj to just not talk much. like. i need our relationship to stop existing in its current for in a tangeble way #not enough to just talk less bc then shes like why r we talking less. but i dont have the option of just saying hey ur mean and i dont #wanna be kinda-friends anymore. we can just have the same kinda relationship i have with the rest of our siblings #because i have literally nobody else here and if she gets mad im kinda fucked. i need her to take me to work. i cant compromise that #its just. idk it sucks. i think itll be healthy to jave distance from her when i move away so that ohr relationship can do the thing quietly #idk. i would have no problem with just changing things immediately but she always has reacted badly to that stuff sooo #ive felt yhis way for many years now but i felt like i was the problem and that shes actually fine but thats not it #and i keep trying to fix it but idk. shes just unpleasant. shes not horrible but we do NOT work. i need to talk to my other older sister #more cause shes really nice. probably gonna help her get a job and stuff when i move. maybe we will move in together #only for like a temp time but just so she can get a handle on living on ur own. and she would need a ride to work n stuff #shes very loud so id rather not live with her. i wanna live alone. but i wanna help her out also bc nobody is willing to do that for her #and also treat her like a capable adult. how can she learn how to be an adult if nobody treats her like one? shes perfectly capable once #she learns but its not stuff u just know on ur own. well. without other ppl getting in the way we communicate very well #idk. thats way future stuff tho. but maybe will do that in the future. im trying to be optimistic and think abt my oter siblings to talk to #i have 3 who are old enough to have regular conversations with and the other 2 r a bit young. 2 of the 3 r kinda mean tho #well. me and my other older sister can live in the least fav children club and talk abt how rude the other 2 are lol

[kaijutegu]

Aug ABSOLUTELY deserves the praise, @ryukikit. St. Augustine Alligator Farm is one of my favorite animal facilities, hands down. It's a pretty zoo, doable in an afternoon if you kinda like crocodilians, or an all day affair if you REALLY like crocodilians. Here are my favorite things about it and why I think it's worth supporting.

1. They keep animals in interesting social groups.

Crocodilians are heavily involved parents, but most places that breed them don't have the enclosure space to let the babies stay with the parents. St. Augustine does. One of my favorite groups was their crèche of slender-snouted crocodiles. They had the parents and then a yearling cohort and a new hatchling cohort. This aligns with how these guys live in the wild- the babies stick around longer! They have the space for it, and they are very in tune with the social needs of their animals.

Very, very few zoos can keep their baby crocs with the adults and still perform maintenance and animal health checks safely. This doesn't mean these facilities are bad- it just means that they have different management practices. And frankly, a lot of these species aren't frequently bred elsewhere. Your average zoo doesn't need a setup where you can have a multiyear crèche for slender-snouted crocodiles. Some species have better success when the young are pulled early, and some zoos are better set up to raise out any offspring separately or behind the scenes. Every facility's practices are different, and this just happens to work well at St. Augustine and be really enjoyable to see as a zoo patron.

Crocodilians are exceptional parents and very protective. It's a sign of incredible animal management practices and animals that feel very comfortable with staff that St. Augustine can do this with nearly every species they breed.

2. They understand the social needs of their animals.

Some crocodilians are social. Some are solitary. Some can live happily with a member of the opposite sex but get territorial around members of the same sex. St. Augustine pays incredible attention to their social groupings to ensure that they aren't just meeting the animals' physical health needs but their social needs as well. They do continuous scientific research about social structures in crocodilians, taking blood samples to test stress hormones and observing stress behaviors to see how group dynamics change.

For example, St. Augustine is home to one of the world's largest known living saltwater crocodiles, Maximo. And his comparatively tiny mate, Sydney. During the educational presentations with these two, they point out that even their monster of a croc needs his social group- he won't eat if she's not around and he is calmer during medical checks if he can see her. These animal share a deep and special pair bond, and they make sure to talk about how the social aspect of these animals' lives is integral to their care. It's a unique aspect of the way they talk about these animals, because he IS a spectacle and he IS a sensation, but they don't talk about him like he's a mindless killing machine- they talk about him like he's a big, complex predator with social needs like any other animal. Aug is the only facility I've been to where the emotional and social needs of crocodilians is part of the education they provide guests- and speaking of education...

3. Their demos and presentations are extremely good.

The presentations at St. Augustine are some of the best I've ever seen, and I've seen literally hundreds of animal talks on everything from aardvarks to zebras. But as you... can probably tell from my blog content, I've spent a lot of time learning about and working with reptiles. I really enjoyed all of their presentations because they are very scientific about things and avoid sensationalism. They really want you to be fascinated by these creatures and love them- but more than anything else, they want you to respect them.

Also, they do a really good job handling their ambassadors. I really enjoyed something as simple as watching an educator tell us about snakes. Throughout the whole presentation she made sure that most of the snake's body was looped in her hand. The snake was always supported and was very calm. She gave the snake plenty of head room so that it didn't feel constricted- it was just good handling all around.

But also, the presentations made it clear how much the park cares about the animals' well-being. When they do the feeding and training presentations, they make it very clear that the animals' participation is entirely voluntary. They do things differently for their 9-foot saltie and their 16-foot saltie, because the 16-footer is so large and heavy he actually struggles walking on land sometimes. They adapt their programs and his care to ensure that he's completely comfortable- and he didn't actually participate in the whole feeding when I was watching! At no point did they try to push him into anything uncomfortable; they offered, he didn't engage, and they moved on. It was a clear expression of his boundaries, and I really appreciated how much his caretakers respected that.

4. Ethical Interactions

I've been to... a lot of tourist locations in Florida that have animals you can hold. Almost always against my will! Many of them are pretty terrible, and you don't actually learn much, if anything. But I really found that to not be the case at St. Augustine. Every single animal presentation and interaction opportunity was accompanied by education about the animal's biology, habits, and- crucially- their conservation status.

When I held a baby alligator at St. Augustine, the proctors- there were two, one to ensure I was holding the gator correctly and the other to educate- were very informative about the role alligators play in their ecosystem and their conservation history. The animals were all properly banded, and one of the two proctors was there to ensure that none of the baby alligators were uncomfortable. As soon as they started getting squirmy or tense, they were removed, unbanded, and taken to an off-exhibit area to relax. And when the babies age out of petting size, they just go in the lagoon to live with others of their species. I saw one upset alligator the entire time I was there, and he was clearly upset that his escape attempt was foiled by a keeper during my nursery tour.

Even though he's restrained in this shot, you can see that his full body and tail are supported, and the grip, while firm, is gentle. He's distressed, but after I took this picture, she put him in his enclosure and he calmed down immediately.

Sometimes when you have petting attractions with baby animals, those animals... don't have a happy ending. (See: cub petting.) But St. Augustine's program is fine- the gators are all aged out of wanting to have mom around, there's no declawing/defanging, and they're handled with care. And it's worth it, because people love what they understand. St. Augustine was integral in raising public awareness about alligators back in the 60s when they were endangered, and now they're thriving- largely in part to programs like St. Augustine getting people to care.

And speaking of getting people to care, let's talk about their research.

5. Shared Research Results

St. Augustine is also home to more species of crocodilian than anywhere else in North America- all of them, usually. (They didn't have a Tomistoma when I visited- that may have changed.)

Because of this species diversity, it's an incredible research resource. Having every species means that you can do a lot of work comparing their behaviors, their growth patterns, and more. They've been a major research site for crocodilian biology since the 1970s. Today, they're one of the key sites for studying crocodilian play and social behaviors. They actually maintain a blog where they post copies of papers that were written using their animals, meaning that you can actually see the results of the research your admission helps fund. You can see that right here: https://www.alligatorfarm.com/conservation-research/research-blog/

All of this adds up to a zoo that provides a unique experience, tons of actual education, and transparency about what its research and conservation steps actually are. St. Augustine's come a long way since its opening in 1893, and they really do want you to leave with a new respect for the animals they care for. Ultimately, if you're a fan of reptiles, you can feel good about visiting the St. Augustine Alligator Farm- their care and keeping are top of the line, they do a ton of innovative conservation research and support for conservation organizations, and you can see this animal there:

(Gharial from the front. Nothing is wrong with her that's just what they look like from the front.)

#long post #st. augustine alligator farm #alligator #crocodile #reptiblr