#Chapter 2 is so much worse

[beaulesbian]

I was once again thinking about this goofy Luffy moment after his Lucci punch™ and i had to see it frame by frame.

first the force of it throws them both away, and while Lucci is seen on screen tumbling for a long moment, Luffy is just away in a blink of an eye.

and then his funny scene - his legs are like jelly that he tries to get under control,

he stumbles, falls, rolls into a mix of all his limbs and eyes,

and then only the cloud behind him cushions his fall

- which would be interesting if he can subconsciously control that while he tries to regain the control over his movements - that the environment around him still adapts to his awakened Devil Fruit abilities and morphs to help him. Where others would probably fall through that cloud, for Luffy that cloud backs him up like a trampoline.

It's just fascinating!

#still thinking about this new ep? its more likely than you think #monkey d. luffy #monkey d luffy #one piece #one piece spoilers #one piece ep 1100 #luffy #mine #gif:op anime #long post #egghead arc #egghead spoilers #op spoilers #sun god nika #gear 5 #i guess something like that might have been already used in wano but its these new eps that im caught up with so its like. new for me lol #and something i can notice while waiting for a new eps #i wanna know more how much the DF controls luffy and how much he is able to control it.. . *thinking face*. #especially if what im thinking could be some parallels between lucci having worse control over his DF (in the current manga) than he thinks #if it changes his characteristics that much and if that could be used as storytelling point to see that either 1. yeah it could be potentia #danger for luffy too. or 2. luffy is that stronger that he can already control it better by now. even maybe subconsciously #i just love how this anime part aired during that interesting rob lucci manga chapter few weeks ago. like.. so many thoughts

[azenhawke]

More Berdly and Deltarune doodles because I'm normal about it

#deltarune #deltarune chapter 2 #Berdly #deltarune berdly #queen deltarune #q5u4ex7yy2e9n #susie deltarune #spamton #kris deltarune #kris dreemurr #How have I become so much worse at drawing Spamton #My art

[cassianandfenrysaremyboyos]

I'm sorry but this just pisses me off (Not Hunt obviously, but Bryce)

Bryce rant incoming which you can just ignore and I'll probably delete later

But Bryce just puts all the blame on the Asteri. And yes ultimately they are to blame in the larger sense of things. But Bryce plays a direct role in leading them down the path that results in Hunt, Ruhn and Baxian being caught. It was her need to find out Danika's secrets with no thought to the consequences, her idea to go to the Eternal City. And she takes NO personal responsibility for it at all!

Hunt is blaming himself for everything that's happened. Even when it's not his fault at all. When we're in his pov he's constantly drowning in guilt, thinking about how he should of done more, he should of tried harder, he should of been better, how it's all his fault this happened and that his friends suffered.

And then Bryce does none of that. When we're in her pov she doesn't really show any major guilt. I can't think of any times when she blames herself like Hunt does. And I'm not saying she should be wracked with guilt. But a normal person, a good person, will usually feel bad and will feel guilty and blame themselves to some degree when something bad happens and people they care about are hurt, regardless of how big or small they're involvement is, or even if they're not at fault at all, case in point Hunt being wracked with guilt even when it's not his fault.

And to make it worse she acknowledges that Hunt warned them, warned her. But that she disregarded it and would of done it no matter what.

And then she has the audicity to say she doesn't regret it. And she thought they were on the same page. ON THE SAME PAGE!!?? Hunt made it clear in hosab that he didn't want to go down this road again, that he didn't want to get involved. YOU just didn't listen Bryce. And yeah Hunt's an adult, he can make his own decisions and he could of said no and not gone. But of course, OF COURSE!! he wasn't going to let Bryce go down that road alone, because he loves her, and doesn't want anything to happen to her, and wants to protect, so of course he would never desert her. But that doesn't mean he wanted to do it!

For Bryce to be that unaware of Hunt's feelings, when he explicitly stated them. For her to be that disconnected from her mate's feelings that she's surprised that he wasn't really on board is kinda unfathomable to me. Just that complete lack of awareness really does make her look quite selfish/self centered.

Anyway sorry, this post is a mess but I just had to vent

And then when Hunt mentions the consequences he and his friends faced, Bryce makes it about her pain. She's hurt that Hunt mentioned that they suffered. And the worst part is, Hunt then regret's it, he regrets saying something that hurts Bryce, because he cares about her and feelings. And she does not consider his feelings to the same degree

It just pisses me off

#honestly with bryce's lack of feelings of guilt her lack of consideration of other people's feelings and her lack of taking responsibility #for her actions i think sarah has unintentionally written her as kinda a bit of a sociopath #anyway like i said in a previous post *sigh* i miss hoeab bryce my beloved #hoeab bryce had gone through so much and had a lot of growth through the first book and had so much potential for more #but then it just stopped. went backwards even. in fact i think hofas bryce has gotten worse #she's had no development for 2 books now and the further i get into hofas more and more apparent it's become how flawed #and one dimensional her character is #her being in prythian and the acotar characters carried her early chapters but now that she's back in midgard her lack of growth and #maturity is starting to grate on me. literally every other pov character has had more development then her #in all the other character pov's they are constantly self reflection they feel guilt they blame themselves they consider the feelings #of those around them. they consider how their actions have affected those around them. they take responsibility for their actions #bryce's pov does not do that to the same degree. if at all #there's minimal critical thought. no self reflection. a lack of taking any responsibility for her actions and the consequences #she's really is a very flat character. what you see is what you get #and her 'sassyness' (that was fine at first when there actually was more to her character) which is supposed to come across as #witty funny badass who takes no shit ect. more and more is just comes across as annoying and immature #and often inflammatory in situations that require maturity sensitivity and tact #her disrespect for the ocean queen who is helping you and is super powerful and not someone you want to make #an enemy of was just unnecessary and not smart tactically #and this is super nitpicky but I'm getting so sick of bryce's clothes. please get her out of those ridiculous leggins and pink sneakers #they were fine when she was going to the nail salon and the gym but how am i supposed to take her seriously on a world saving #mission in those clothes. how am i supposed to take her seriously as a queen (ugh) conversing with the ocean queen #in those clothes #and I'm loath to say it because i love hoeab quinlar with my whole heart but hofas bryce doesn't deserve hunt #the devotion and consideration hunt has for bryce and her feelings is not returned to the same degree to him #anyway i was hoping to get my hoeab bryce back but it hasn't happened but hopefully the second half of the book #can turn things around for her #pleaseee

[trucywright]

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: DCU, DCU (Comics), Justice Society of America (Comics) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Salem Nader & Khalid Nassour, Salem Nader & Kent Nelson, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added Characters: Salem Nader, Khalid Nassour, Courtney Whitmore, Gloria James, Justice Society Ensemble, Other Character Tags to Be Added Additional Tags: Missing Scene, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Family Drama, salem has feelings but is a brat, No beta we die like Kent Nelson, Team Dynamics, Team Bonding, Family Issues Series: Part 1 of the saga of salem nader

Summary:

A series of "missing scenes" centered around Salem Nader.

Chapter 1: After the fight with the Childminder, Stargirl informs them that they'll be merged back into the timeline... in 2023.

Chapter 2 (coming soon): Salem waits with the other children outside Stargirl's house. When the JSA arrive, she spots a familiar helmet, only to be disappointed.

Later chapters will involve the JSA and Helena Wayne. Some tags apply to these later chapters.

#salem nader #salem the witch girl #courtney whitmore #dc comics #ive nearly finished chapter 2 #it was originally one chapter but i decided to split it apart #the title is a joke about how in greek myth the bronze age is so much worse than the golden age #shes having a bad time #my fanfic #my fic #my writing

[possiblytracker]

feeling normal (birthday in like 3 days that im not ready for) feeling normal (too artblocked and preoccupied to even think about finishing artfight and wrestling with guilt about it) feeling normal (-£600 in bank account) feeling normal (realised breaking my foot last year led to Lasting Consequences but cant see a physio abt my fucked up legs til january) feeling normal (has to learn to drive stick and the instructor is scary) feeling normal (stlil has no idea how to un-fuck social life after the great mental breakdown of april 2023) feeling normal (gross sobbing)

#'hows it going' yeah everything is happening so much its fine tho <2 #like im FINE im just. all over the goddamn place i need things to just settle down #i applied for a job thats like. actually the closest thing i can think of to my dream job. like. rare opportunity where i can suck up to th #employer as much as i want about the place having a huge impact on my life and mean every single word of it for real #(its at the bird park where i used to volunteer but this time doing flight displays animal training and education) #im slightly underqualified for it (no prior hands-on experience and no drivers license yet) so i might not even get the interview #so not getting my hopes up high yet #i can always volunteer there again on weekends while i work whatever retail gig will take me if i dont #but fuuuck it'd be nice. so so cool #'required qualifications: undergrad degree in fields related to animal behaviour' me rolling up with my shiny new Animal Behaviour BSc: #anyway. AUghrh #give things a few more weeks to shake out. ill be okay #having complicated feelings about one chapter of my life being over.. its a fucked up transitory period thats prolly gonna feel worse- #before it feels better #but ill settle into it soon especially once i get a job/my sister goes to college in september #....and i get the goddamn boxes out of my room so it feels more like a place i actually live again jgHJSDN #vent/ #its not Really but close enough

[floorpancakes]

#twitter repost #i guess its probably not THAT controversial i think i just really wanted to get that off my chest #xxxholic #i guess #no but like even tho mostly the quality was incredible the fact they basically were like HAHA ASSPULL and then dipped soon after is so.. #i think im even a couple chapters behind and im not even rushing to catch up on them cause it burned me so bad #also cause its clamp im like. they can and will get worse sometimes with their weird shit and i cant trust that they wont #in fact holic is a funny one cause altho im less familiar with other series i know full well holic is one of their least Messy™ ones #iykwim #obviously thats not an inherent metric but like holic is usually nonsense free but i will never stop giving clamp bombastic side eye after #parts of the og ending and MOSTLY the fakeout alt universe mystery arc turning into an irrelevant fetch quest like #how do u produce media so perfect and then do that #and its also so long past tsubaholis main writing period so its like who cares??? why now??? #especially cause it was like boom hiatus #anyway thats the main reason u never catch me rereading rei much at all #like i dont have an encyclopaedic knowledge of it solely cause the twist outcome pissed me off and made me so fckin nervous for the future #also im just worried now the movies done theyll be like oh we wrote 2 chapters ajd back to hiatus good riddance!! like #I've seen the digital fear struck into the eyes of x fans i wouldnt put it past them #anyway im still excited but god damn am i nervous and fucking suspicious as hell #sigh #why cant we live in a no fakeout more interesting arc ender world where also they decided to not pull a teacher student age gap 'ship' #ship in quotes cause they obviously dont fcking love each other #but clamp is SOOOOO addicted to that trope they wanted to mess with it a little like a cat with yarn even if its non romantic #like they were like we r a thirsty flower if we dont do something problematic even as a plot contrivance with no romance we will dieeeeeeee #one day i when holic is public domain (yeah im gonna live until like 500 im so cool like that) i will release hit doumeki movie #not trying to be a hater btw they do great work but damn if those ladies dont make me nervous as hell for where this whole thing could go #or if they even wanna finish it

[lesbianlotties]

everyday i'm choosing violence (forcing myself to sit in front of my computer and work on my thesis)

#kidnapping and torture (i dont let myself leave for an hour) #someone let me be free i'm dying over here!!!!!!! (almost done with chapter 1) #it's getting worse before it gets better (just thinking about corrections and then cHaPTer 2???? makes me faint) #i have no idea what i'm talking about anymore. i mean in this post but also in my thesis #i'm going to be so annoying about this the entire year besties #well hopefully not the WHOLE year like. let's all pray i finish much earlier

[chromatic-corrosion]

.

#so i wake up and find out that Escaping Virtuality got chapter 4!!! #very good chapter! #and theres sooo much to enjoy and talk about! #1) everyone still has difficulty remembering their past despite the familiar environment- #-and it seems that from Jax's part of the chapter theyd feel more familiarity with their circus names than real ones #2) who is the man ragatha found? who knows? but itll probably be revealed next chapter! #3) Caine's movement being eerie in his human body!!!! AMAZING!!!!!! #stiff and robotic. with a grin that seems too wide for a human. his unblinking eyes which stare a little too intensely. #human physically but moves in way that triggers uncanny valley #4) Caine Desdemona #Desdemona means 'ill-fortuned' or 'unlucky' #if you were implying that Caine is human then he got the worse end of the stick #he keeps his first name. but forgot everything else. #And if Caine was human then itd explain where he got his human body from! #this is more explainable than '' caine has a human body because it was made from pieces of the others' '' #...i wonder how Caine would react to seeing that document. jax IS carrying them so hes probably gonna give them to the others. #and how would everyone react to that file? they believe hes an ai so him being human would be shocking #or was Caine based off of Caine Desdemona and thats why Caine has his name? #and if there was a Caine Desdemona then was there a Abel Desdemona? #and what does C&A mean? #also pomni needs a russian name because 'pomni' is a russian word! :-) #who knows? who knows? #all i know is that is an amazing story and i cant wait to see how it goes! no matter how long i need to wait i have the peace of knowing- #-that itd release anyways eventually! #and caine angst is going to come soon enough! #seasalt speaks #EscapingVirtuality

[meganechan05]

So uh, should I ask what exactly was in the King-Ohger leaks for the next four episodes? I mean next week's 'Hilbil makes everyone turn on their own rulers and makes them want them dead, driving them into despair in the process' plot will definitely be emotional, but does Toei intend to top that that in the weeks to come?

Imma put it under the cut but I'd rather say take it with a grain of salt but I'm still terrified...

Basically in Episode 30, Karras would return and we would learn the truth behind Rita's eye.

This is claimed to be a leak while 31 is confirmed to have Jeramie backstory and the leak says that Daigo/KyoryuRed will appear in 32 (Oct 8)

But yeah

Eye lore

Karras returns

Rita Angst

#im not ready #so not ready #this week already fcked me up so i fear for Ep29 and 30's preview #nope #imma punch TakaMina if i could #that's just cruel to do this to us #i thought Kingohger Chapter 2 was gonna be fun but it's not #its so much worse

[trashbaget]

kyler strikes again with yet another offensively terrible love declaration!!!

#i have 2 chapters and an epilogue left good god #it just gets fucking worse #give me some bad smut #i’ve read so much of this godawful internal monologuing and dreadful dialoguing #i almost forgot i was reading a bad romance #raeding tag!

[glitchafton]

Vanessa: Sir?

William: I'm sorry to say you're still stuck with me.

Vanessa: I know, you kept saying "Why." whenever I'd look at the bedroom window too long.

William: It's between the bedroom and living room, anyone would be baffled by that.

Vanessa: Having no window to the outside in the bedroom lowered the cost so I didn't have to get a studio. Plus it gives the place character. There are more positives than negatives to the window thing.

Vanessa: But besides that you're okay? I usually don't keep my PC off that long...

William: Why do you think that would be a problem. As it is, I was fully with you the entire time. And the virus half to start with.

Vanessa: One of these days I'm going to need you to fully explain how anything about you functions from your side of things because I'm getting a bit over just nodding along when you say things.

William: Now that I think I've worked it out myself, I'd be glad to. It's...strange, even to me. Not the worst situation I've found myself in but still not ideal.

Vanessa: I'm too exhausted from hauling boxes for that right now, but this is important right now can you go between infected computers and people without internet?

William: No. Even moving between computers that aren't in the same network isn't as easy as I'd like.

William: So I'm trying not to fixate on being confined yet again...

Vanessa: I'm gonna annoy the landlord about it in the morning. Past Monday I go around her.

William: So just a few days.

Vanessa: Do you have something you want to get done or is it just being the whole confinement issue.

William: The 2nd.

Vanessa: Oh.

Vanessa: I don't know if I ever actually said that I'm sorry about the whole RabbitSnare thing. I didn't know it was going to hurt you, or that it could. Or that you have more than the normal level of issues with being trapped.

William: It's fine, a bit of pain was worth the long term of it, and at least it was feeling something. Just anything. Describing my normal state as numb is too strong for how void it is.

Vanessa: You say that now, but when I tried launching it again, you made it sound like I was torturing you.

William: Because felt like being repeatedly stabbed the entire time and the one benefit it had already done. That might even be a contender for one of the worst things I've lived through.

Vanessa: Both times or only when I tried containing you again?

William: Both.

Vanessa: Hid it well that first go. And still spent the entire time trying to claw your way out.

William: Why would I lie?

Vanessa: Sympathy?

William: I'm good without it.

Vanessa: I know, sir.

William: I'm surprised you and your ex didn't have more of a fight around the move.

Vanessa: You're not even going to try to change the topic naturally?

Vanessa: But I'm sure Abby realized we basically already broke up weeks ago. And it's better that it ended like this than with another fight, I hate getting into fights with her. But even if you weren't involved I doubt we were going to last much longer, we were already having problems before you made it more complicated.

William: Or you would have gotten bored, she was a bit of a ditz

Vanessa: Hey! Most of that is just that she's from the valley and sounds like it. I don't date people who are stupid or boring.

Vanessa: But you just wanted to watch us fight didn't you?

William: I only get so much entertainment in my life.

Vanessa: That's fair. You might still get it, I stole her favorite blouse and a little frog figurine that her girlfriend before me gave her.

William: But why?

Vanessa: I don't know. It seemed like a good idea in the moment ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Vanessa: Also probably just that I'm not used to breaking up with someone so calmly. Normally you would get the show you were looking for, screaming, fighting, scratching, throwing things, saying the exact worst thing possible thing they could ever hear someone tell them just because I want them to be left feeling worse than I was.

The best was when I was 19 I lit my ex-boyfriend's car on fire, and I wish I went further because he deserved it.

Vanessa: So I think I just needed to cause a very tiny issue.

Vanessa: And it's a really cute frog figure, I'd miss having him around.

#The Chat log semi fic #...........there is very much a part 2 to this one I'll probably also post today. #where they don't go sharply off topic mid way :) #since again it falls under very direct follow ups #and bla bla bla I don't like making these too long due to format #so even if I wanted to post a proper chapter worth of content it couldn't work #(and I need to add more things like the shrug emoji to just give the reminder this is text based in universe. #the original 2nd half was actually on that topic but also I needed something lighter to end this one on for reasons.) #(Also I swear every time I describe Vanessa's past she becomes more of a mess each time. #I think I'm going to have to reign myself in past this point even if there is a planned pay off #and not making her worse to start with before her slide into murder.)

[dirkxcaliborn]

I keep poly-shipping and then being upset there's no content... or worse, someone wrote it but they wrote it wrong

#coyo speaks #AxB is the most popular ship out of the trio... with AxC being second most and BxC being the least.... #so why in the miniscule amount of ot3 works is C at the center of their trio????? #even worse one of the works was tagged AxBxC.... but it was really AxB and BxC in two different chapters #I just Really think that B and C only work with A between them #the one that split them up even explicitly said A and C weren't together #I'm so upset #also very sad for another trio that I really only ship two of the characters.... but the other two combinations are so much more popular #that one's past valk with shu mika and nazuna #and like... I do kinda ship them as a trio #but only with Mika in the center #Shu is very rarely if ever allowed to put his hands on Nazuna #he hasn't earned the right back after everything he did #but ShuNazu is so much more popular than MikaNazu #crying on the floor (pt.2) #once I get my ipad maybe I will draw again #and I will force everyone to behold my unpopular ships

[birlwrites]

nope. nailed it. i know exactly what's bothering me about writing right now: the fact that i often feel like i'm less of a human and more of a Free Content Dispenser™ to the people reading my stuff

#i wonder if regular update schedules actually are making this worse #like clockwork. write 2 or 3 chapters per week. publish 1 chapter per week. next week it will be the same #but also i don't know how else to update #i want to write faster than i update so that i can edit in swathes #and i also want to post as i go so more people see it #obviously this varies from person to person #there are people who i actually talk to and feel like i'm friendly with #but the Fic Dispenser feeling is.... it's pervasive #i doubt it's just me #given the amount of posts that i see that are basically fic writers begging for more interaction #anyway this is ok to reblog #but of course not obligatory #one of the reasons that i include author's notes on every chapter and sign off with my internet name #is specifically to humanize myself a little bit #but idk how much it's working #anyway if i've ever had a conversation with you i love you

[marklikely]

when i see a sequel trilogy i floor it

#if i had a nickel for every time i saw a beloved 70s-80s franchise i love get a shitty sequel trilogy id #avpost #actually my experiences seeing rise of skywalker halloween ends and it chapter 2 were all extremely similar #sit down determined to like it. see the beginning and think well. i dunno about that. but it could be worse. #watch like. half? of the movie. seeing a few things to like about it but being iffy on a few others. sitting slightly confused. #very suddenly at that halfwayish mark being hit with the realization of Oh. I Hate This. I Hate This Movie. #spend the last half thinking about how much i am hating this movie right now. weighing the pros and cons of just walking out. #leaves thinking well that sucked i hated it but it could have been worse. but over the next week growing to despise it #ALSO THOR LOVE AND THUNDER. same exact experience. #so its not just trilogies it can also be direct sequels to one movie i liked. #movie diary

[thefunniestguy]

OUGH

#vent #vent in tags #i genuinely wish so badly that i could go back just . 2 years w the knowledge i have now #current living situations are bad and im not being dramatic when i say that ONE decision made everything the way it is today (not good) #i dont care if id have to go through any of the bad days again - i would relive every single one of the bad days from these 2 years #if it meant i could change that ONE thing . im not even sure i could convince my family not to do it but id do anything to just TRY #ough deja vu doesnt help wh #anyway YEAH looking back at old pictures i donot care about any 'good' that came from it bc the bad is so much worse #i dont even care if i learn a lesson from this. i HAVE but its a lesson i already knew and didnt need to 'learn the hard way' #its stupid but . at this point my little brain is practically wishing on stars and wish fountains /hj #i just wanna . start over . start this point of my life over . rewrite this certain chapter yk #theres a lot i wouldnt do different but . those little things that had a negative domino effect yk ? #i know theres no going back seeing as my life isnt a movie so . i know i just have to move on and do what i can but #the frustrating part is theres so little that i can do . no matter how hard i try nothing i do to try and help this is even worthwhile #GRRRR and if i said the reason then it would sound ridiculous and dumb so im not gonna say but its genuinely not ridiculous and dumb to me #ive got one year until i can attempt to put this behind me but hhhhh ill feel bad bc im also leaving the people i actually care for behind #imean my friends are fine off- this doesnt affect them- but ive spent all my life trying to protect my mom and sister anddd #i wont be there to protect them #HHHHHHHHHHhhhh

[loganlermanstanaccount]

Show me where it hurts (part 1)

Miguel O'Hara x spiderwoman!reader

(AO3 Mirror), Part 2, Main Masterlist

summary: Miguel's acting weird, and you make it your mission to find out exactly what's going on.

warnings: no warnings for this chap, pg-13, swearing and canon level violence. smut next chapter xoxo

a/n: this is a combination of 2 asks and this post I saw on here a while ago: flirty/ snarky fem reader, Miguel during a ""rut"" (I don't know if it counts as a rut really, but its to do with his animal instincts/DNA) and Lyla playing matchmaker.  I had so much fun writing this, enjoy :D

(i wrote this pre seeing spiderverse 2, so i think characterisation is a little off, esp for Lyla, apologies! I'll fix it in my upcoming fics)

edit: I use the term "bichita" which I have been informed can be read not as I intended in Spanish. I'm not a native speaker so I want to apologise in advance. I'm doing more research for my future fics and leaving this up as a testament to my stupidity. Spanish speakers, feel free to correct me / clown my ass in the comments. My bad guys :(

wc: 3.6k

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You think Miguel is avoiding you. 

One of your closest friends, giving you the runaround for months, it seems. Calling the two of you close friends is a little extreme, sure. You've only known O'Hara for two years, and been in love with him for slightly less than that, thank you very much. And yes, he refuses to call you by anything but your last name. And the last time you saw him he wouldn't so much as look at you, but that was besides the point. 

"..the point," You tell Lyla, in between exasperated bites of cereal, "... is that aren't elite forces of spiderpeople supposed to, you know, have some spiderpeople kick ass once in a while? And where exactly is our fearless leader? I haven't seen O'Hara's scary ass in weeks, and I'm starting to miss it."

She gives you a look, one that says this isn't what I'm programmed for , but you pointedly ignore it. 

"His ass, by the way." You clarify. "I very specifically miss his ass. Remind me to get his routine. I know girls that would kill for…"

"How the fuck did you get in here?" A voice croaks. You turn behind you and see Miguel, not in his suit, but wrapped up in a blanket like he's just woken up. And he looks rough, like a train ran him over on the way here: puffy eyes, splotchy skin, tension kneaded into his brow. 

"Wow." Your spoon drops into the milk. "You look like shit.." 

He furrows his brow even deeper, if that was possible. " Mierda. You shouldn't be here." 

"This isn't quite the welcome party I was expecting, man. I'm the only one to actually turn up to one of your meetings, and this is what I get?" 

"I thought I told Lyla to cancel," He mutters, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

"Cancel? Since when do you miss a chance to talk about rules and protocol?" 

"I don't have time for this-" 

"-and I'm not leaving without a proper explanation. Is everything okay?" 

"It's actually way worse now you're here." He deadpans. 

"Haha ." You turn to Lyla. "You drop everything to travel halfway across the multiverse and this asshole won't even say thanks." 

"Thanks, but this asshole needs you to leave. Now." 

This is the most he's spoken to you in forever, and you hate that you like it. You just want his attention, however it comes. If that means dragging this out so maybe he acknowledges you, touches you, looks at you - then so be it. Squinting, you get closer to him. You scan his face for anything to latch onto. You put a hand on his shoulder, still searching. 

"You sure you're alright? You know you can tell me if-" 

"Si, si." He grits his teeth, looking away. "M'just fine. I'll explain…. later."

"...because I'm your right hand man?" You grin, poking at his brow. "Stop frowning so much Miguel, you're gonna ruin that pretty face of yours."

He flushes, nervous, and swats you away. "-what? N-No. You're not my right hand man and I like my face just the way it is. Now, leave. "

Making your way to the door, you tap your nose teasingly. "You know where to find me!" 

When the door closes with a click, you make your way down the corridor, and stop in your tracks when you hear it. It's muffled, but with the strain of your supersenses you can make out Miguel's voice just beyond the wall. 

"I just…. don't want her to see me like this… Lyla, it's not happening… I can't tell her…." Tell her what, exactly? 

Resolutely, you make up your mind. Miguel O'Hara's got a secret. And before you leave for home, you're gonna do everything in your God given power to wear him down and find out. 

~~~

Despite his insistence otherwise, you liked to think of yourself as O'Hara's right hand man - and most of the other spiderpeople thought so too. You were one of the very first he recruited, after crash landing onto your earth like a spiderman-shaped meteor; the two of you were inseparable. Miguel was stubborn and headstrong and thought he was right all the time. Infuriatingly, he was, but that didn't stop you from telling him to get his head out of his own ass when his ego grew too big. 

He was different around you, you think. Softer, sometimes. Harsher, other times. He told you what you needed to hear whether you wanted to or not; the result of mutual respect and agonising persistence. Slowly, you had chipped away his hard exterior; the one he built because he thought he needed to push people away. In that regard, you were similar, but this need manifested in you like a weed - an awful, awful compulsion to joke and laugh at your own expense, to keep others at an arm's length. You had spent your whole life picking and pruning away at yourself, looking for perfection. Even after all this, multiverse-hopping and fighting alongside people who were the closest things you had to friends , it wasn't enough. There was still something missing. 

Ironically, Miguel had told you something similar the one of the last times you had spoken. You had fucked up a mission, well and truly. In the aftermath, all you can remember is coming back to base, limping on Jessica's arm. 

"She's hurt!" She cries out. Lyla materialises and leads you both to the med bay, inspecting any visible wounds. There's a deep laceration, sticky with blood, at the base of your stomach. You shift onto the bed and hiss with pain. 

Miguel is quick to follow, face twisted with confusion, pain, sadness. Even in your haze, you feel the tension radiating off of him as he drags over a cart of supplies. 

"What happened?" He strains. 

"I don't even… it happened so fast. We got ambushed, and all of a sudden I'm on the ground. I wasn't thinking straight and… " She sobs. "...she jumped in front of me. God, she saved my life-" 

"-wasn't your fault, Jess." You croak, trying to sit up. "And I'm fine. Just need to walk it off…"

"Sit, bichita," His nickname makes you frown, despite yourself, and you settle back down. "Lyla, what's the damage?"

Your vision goes spotty, and Lyla's voice barely registers. All you can feel is searing pain in your side, but Miguel is warm, oh so warm. You clutch his arms, and force him to look you in the eye. 

"M'ready, Miguel." He nods weakly, but you don't think he understands. "I mean it . I can lead, j-just need another chance and I won't let you down… Jess, tell him that I can-" 

"It's okay. I believe you. You just need to relax for me, hmm?" He clutches at your hand, tight, and it's like you're the only two people in the world. "You did good. I promise."

Faintly, you nod. You feel a pinch at your arm, and Jessica's there, with an empty vial of something in her hands. The pain washes over you, and you fight to keep your eyes open. In those last few moments of light, you swear you feel a shaky kiss pressed to your temple. 

"Sleep, mi bichito amoroso. Sleep."

When you come to, you're still in the medbay, moonlight streaming through. Well, artificial moonlight. Time worked a little differently here, something Miguel explained to you a while ago - God knows what about dilation and quantum interference. It makes you smile now, remembering his frustration as he tried to explain to no avail. You were the only spiderman this side of the multiverse without a degree in quantum tech, you had said with a lopsided smile. 

You move to sit, and pain shoots up your side. Groaning, you push through it, determined to get out of this bed and find the others. As if on cue, Miguel walks in, almost leaping towards you. 

"You should… mierda ! You should be resting in bed."

You pout as you stumble into his chest. He hooks an arm around you and leads you back. You clamber in, sighing. "M'fine, O'Hara."

"Your guts were halfway out of your body less than 24 hours ago. So stay put, or you might give me another heart attack."

You scoff, incredulous. "You were worried?" 

He shrugs. " 'Course I was."

"Why? You know I'm practically indestructible." You give him a shit eating grin, and poke the frown appearing at his brow. He doesn't bat you away like he usually does. 

"Famous last words, bichita." He sighs. You can't speak a lick of Spanish, but you know he only calls you that word when you've frustrated him to his limit. So you take it as a win, for now. 

He drops into the chair next to you. "How are you feeling?" 

"Just peachy, dollface." You wink, and he doesn't so much as groan. 

"I'm being serious. You went through something pretty traumatic…"

"You want me to tell you it hurts, so, so bad, daddy? " You pout and flutter your eyelashes mockingly. Miguel shifts in his seat, unable to make eye contact. 

"That's not what I meant."

"What did you mean, O'Hara? I feel fine. And in a couple of days, I'll feel even better, and I'll be up and about. I can finish what we started and-" 

"-no, absolutely not." He frowns. "A couple of days? I'm sending you home-" 

"You can't do that! On whose fucking authority?"

"On the authority of you almost fucking died ! Keeping you safe is our priority right now-" 

"God, is this my punishment? This is a low blow, O'Hara. You know how hard I've worked for this: months of surveillance and intel a-and I did everything by the book, just like you told me to." You croak. "I fucked up . I know that, and I feel terrible. Give me a chance to make things right; that's all I'm asking. I can do it, I know it. "

He looks at you for a moment, something heavy in his expression. His face contorted, he strips you down to the bone with just his gaze. His voice is so quiet, you almost miss it. 

"....you're still trying to prove yourself, aren't you?"

Honestly, it catches you off guard. You don't even know what the fuck that means, let alone why he said it.

"I don't… I d-don't…?" 

"They all love you. Respect you. More than me I think, sometimes." He chuckles at that. "You're good at what you do. The best . What else are you trying to prove? What else do you need ?" 

Your throat goes dry. You couldn't speak if you wanted to. 

"I'm not punishing you. You made a mistake, but you don't need to be crucified for it. I just want to keep you safe. I can't… we can't lose you."

"Miguel-"

"-this isn't a discussion. And I'm not trying to argue, although I know how much you like to argue." He inches closer, cupping your face gently. You try to move away, blinking back tears. But his hands are steady and he strokes your jaw with so much tenderness you think you hear your heart break. He's pretty, so pretty. You don't deserve him, you think. "There'll be time to fight, bichita. Rest. That's your mission right now."

"C-can't sleep." You breathe. "It hurts." 

Miguel pauses, head tilted like he's thinking. He taps your shoulder. "Scoot over."

You do as he says, and he slips into the bed with you. It's a tight fit, but he manages, placing you on his chest with an arm gently around your shoulders. You bury your face in his hoodie, sniffling and hoping he doesn't notice you choking back sobs. Absentmindedly, he settles into a rhythm, gentle breathing and playing with your hair, soothing you softly. He pretends he can't hear the tears. 

"M'gonna stay here until you're asleep. For as long as you need."

You nod, unable to speak for fear of breaking down. 

~~~

The days after felt like a blur. You woke up to Miguel gone, and an ache in your heart. Jess visits as much as she can, and Ben calls you a couple times, to see if you're okay. Peter B brings Mayday, and she clambers all over your bed, bringing some life into the room. Miguel doesn't visit per se - you hear whispers of him, Lyla visiting in his stead for comprehensive status updates. Once, you wake up in the night to see him on the adjacent chair, head lolling in deep sleep. He looks peaceful, calm - one of the first times you haven't seen his brow furrowed with worry. Of course, he's gone by the morning. 

The very last time you saw him, he opened the portal home. It was weird, after everything, but if Miguel felt the same you wouldn't know. Talking at a thousand miles a minute, he alternates between assuring you they'll be fine without you and situation reports from spider people all across the multiverse. Things you'd missed whilst bedbound, asking for advice before you left. He trusted your judgement and the thought warmed your heart, almost making you forget that he completely brushed past the previous nights before. 

You still remember the last thing he had said to you, which would've been weeks ago, now. 

"...and if you need anything, and I mean anything, you call me directly. Not Jess, not Ben, and certainly not Peter B. Call me, and I'll answer, I promise. You need help, you need advice, you just need someone to talk to, then-"

"-I call you. I get it, O'Hara. Will do." He opens the portal, watching as you walk towards it. He can't take his eyes off of you, even though you can't see him. At the last moment you turn, and run towards him. You almost knock him over with a hug. Burying his head in the crook of your shoulder, he hugs you back, ever careful of your injury. Separating, your smile almost knocks him over again. Weakly, he smiles back as you head through the portal, back home. 

You're left with that feeling, of his arms around your body - warm, so warm - as you putter about by the switchboard. After careful deliberation (you were really, really bored ) you'd taken to manage the Multi Modal Multiversal Switchboard - as aptly named by Miguel. Everyone else called it the Big Red Phone of course, but he had insisted on calling it by its proper name . Every. Time. 

The thought makes you chuckle as you call up Peter B. His icon flashes on the screen in front of you. With a click, he picks up the call, his face materialising holographically in front you. A little hand reaches up and tugs at his ear. 

"Ow… ouch … Dad's on the phone, honey."

"Aww! How's my favourite Parker doing?" 

"Not bad, actually! MJ just made us probably the best burger this side of New York-"

"-sorry, Peter? Me and May are trying to have a conversation." You hear her giggle in the background. Her gap toothed grin pops into frame and she babbles excitedly. "...yeah, exactly May. That's literally what I said."

"Okay, okay, that's enough." He puts the toddler down and watches her scurry away. "You're feeling better, I see."

"Yeah, back in action. Thought I'd check in."

"All good here." He squints, trying to take in your surroundings. "You're at HQ?" 

You hum.

"Could've sworn Lyla cancelled…"

"Yeah, didn't get the memo. But I think something's wrong with O'Hara."

He gives you a weird look. "Uhhh, what makes you think that?" 

"He won't even look at me. Was it something I said? Something I did?" Your eyes narrow. "...what do you know, Peter?"

"Nothing! Absolutely nothing!" He scoffs, a little too quickly, clutching his chest like you've offended him. He's stared down some of the scariest villains around, but the look you give him is truly chilling. "Just… uhhh. You didn't hear this from me." 

"Naturally…"

"We tracked 'em down, the guys that ambushed you and Jessica."

"The Sinister Six? From Earth-215?"

"Yeah, but by the time we got there, it was just Kraven and some of his goons. Miguel got there first, and…." He gulps. "He was pissed. Trashed the whole place looking for the rest of 'em. Beat Kraven half to death and we had to pull him off."

"Shit."

"Yeah, it was pretty rough. Never seen him like that before. And just generally? He'd been weirdly quiet, a little grumpy, more aggressive on missions. I don't know what's gotten into him."

"Hmmm. Thanks, Pete."

"No problem, sweetheart. And if the big guy asks… "

"...this didn't come from you, I know." Weakly, you smile. "Say hi to my favourite Parkers, for me." 

" 'Course I will. We should celebrate, if you're back officially. Mine and MJ's is always open."

"Good to know. I'll see you around."

He waves goodbye, and the hologram clicks off. Sighing, you try to piece together what you've just heard. 

Miguel: acting weird. Well, you knew that already. Aggressive was new. And Lyla? She had canceled, but not for you, for some reason. An honest mistake, perhaps. But Lyla doesn't make mistakes… 

You stew for a couple of hours, puttering about the switchboard, twiddling your thumbs. Something's wrong, and for some reason you're afraid to see him. To have him look straight through you, again, when you ask to do the same. Show me where it hurts. Tell me how to make it better.  

On the way there, you chew your lip in anticipation. In the corridor, you're outside the door to his place, hand hovering above the door. To knock, to call. In the harsh fluorescent light, you hesitate. 

"Lyla?" Nervously, you sink down onto the floor. It's hard to explain, but you don't expect her to actually come; to materialise in front of you. 

"How can I assist you?" She says with a ding. 

"Uhh… hi. Just wanted to talk." You pause, clicking your tongue. "Can you be honest with me?" 

"I can only be honest with you. It is not in my programming to lie, unless specified by my owner."

"Sure. Cool. It's about him, actually. Is Miguel okay?" 

She tilts her head, as if processing your request. "Okay is a subjective term. Is Mr O'Hara alive? Yes. Is Mr O'Hara physically well? Yes. By those terms, he is okay ."

Too vague for your own liking. "I guess I meant more… his emotional state. To the best of your knowledge… in your opinion , Lyla: is Miguel okay?" 

"...I believe Mr O'Hara is experiencing some emotional turmoil."

You frown. "Oh. Do you know why?" 

"Mr O'Hara has instructed me not to disclose that information with you."

"Fair enough. But you don't have to tell me… I could just ask questions?" 

She nods. "There is nothing in my programming that prevents me from answering some questions within certain parameters." 

"Did I do something? Not just today but… last time I was here. Did I say something to hurt or upset him? Is that why he's acting weird?"

"No." She says blankly. "And yes. I suppose it is… complicated." She gestures around that word. 

"I'm a little confused, Lyla."

She sits next to you, on the cool tile. Not that she could feel it, but it feels more intimate - like two friends talking. The extent of Lyla's consciousness, you weren't sure of. Was she alive? To you, she might as well be. Could she think, feel, emote? Maybe, maybe not. You weren't smart enough to understand the nuances of her programming. But you were human enough to see it in her - something glittering beyond the surface. 

It could be projection, but you swear her voice is softer. "He has a name for you. When he speaks about you, and to you. I have it logged in my memory database. Do you know what that is?" You shake your head. 

Lyla opens up her palm and projects videos and images - little Miguel's popping up in her palm, tinny and gruff voices ringing through the hallway. They say your name, shout your name, whisper it. Some say other things in Spanish. Curse words had always been your assumption, and he had given you no reason to think otherwise. Now, having it played back to you, you hear a tenderness in his voice you would've missed. Words and phrases that come up again and again…

"Bichita." She repeats. "Bichito del amor. Mi bichito amoroso. "

You shake your head, still confounded. "...I don't speak Spanish, Lyla." 

"Little bug. Sweetheart. Lovebug. My little lovebug." She clears her throat. "I believe they are terms of endearment."

Steadfast, she directs you towards her palm. Another small Miguel appears, and you think it's him from this morning. 

"I thought I told you not to let anyone in, Lyla?" 

"I did not let her in. She let herself in using the code you previously gave her, Mr O'Hara."

"Yeah, for emergencies. Fuck. Mi bichita, too smart for her own good."

"...If you are in distress, I believe she would understand, Mr O'Hara."

"I just think it's too much. I don't want her to see me like this." 

"According to Alchemax files, previous subjects showing this kind of aggression benefitted from-"

"Lyla, it's not happening, no chance. I can't tell her."

The figure blinks out of her palm. "Mr O'Hara has forbid me from telling you about certain things."

"...but not from showing me." Your eyes meet hers. You give her a watery smile. "Thank you." 

With a hint of a smile, she nods and is gone from the corridor. You are left alone, with nothing but your thoughts of little lovebugs rattling around in your brain.

_

_

_

#miguel o hara x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara #spiderman 2099 #spiderman 2099 x reader #across the spiderverse #kat_writes😼 #this gif is fucking crazy btw