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#Dan's Grandma Explains the Internet
goldenpinof · 5 months
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so soft for @swiftlydnp
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foreverdjh · 1 year
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wasn’t expecting a dan upload today AT ALL, and certainly not a video with his GRANDMA???? but i’m so happy oh my god
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danielhowell · 1 year
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NEW VIDEO - Dan’s Grandma Explains the Internet
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iiworldtour · 1 year
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absolute icon!
Dan's Grandma Explains the Internet
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lesbiandanhowell · 4 months
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Sam reacts to: Dan and Phil React to Every Phil is not on fire! #3
- Literally ran away from my mum for this video, we were watching tv on the couch and I saw the notification and fucking RAN.
- Shaking with anticipation they look so, old school in Dan's shirt and the denim jacket. This is how I remember them from when I first became a fan of them and just that brings up so much nostalgia.
- NOSE TOUCH TEXTURE. Someone on tumblr called that Phil would do it again and they delivered.
- hear discourse (what the heck was I on about with this one??)
- Why did he just fully show his underwear on the internet, like they really already didn't give a fuck anymore back then did they?
- Their sensory icks coming through with the mushroom, like I know that is not a neurotypical reaction.
- Phil hitting dan adorably when Dan says phulge.
- The ladders song appreciation, they do just like their silly compatibility do they?
- "Natural talent for duet improv song writing" cute
- The photo phil took of dan on the couch is so cute somehow I can't explain. It's so, intimate and so, domestic it makes me feel all giddy.
- The salsa and nacho laugh were SO uncomfortable they hated that, like Phil's laugh is not one of finding it actually funny I am sorry.
- "Uhh gif it" FUCK YOU PHIL
- Grandma Lester is THE icon, the more we learn about her the more I admire this woman and everything she did in life.
- PINOF 7 really is very good
- SOFTLAUNCH OF THE GAY HAHAHA
- PHIL CAN NOT STOP POINTING OUT THE TOUCHING IS DRIVING ME INSANE. lIt doesn't feel like he is doing it anymore to make fun of us, his tone is different and he isn't mocking us anymore... it feels like he is doing it for his own fun and almost appreciation of how they have become more comfortable with it.
- The discussion if Yuri On Ice was gay, Dan has much higher standards than I do (or Phil for that matter) and not everything is about sex daniel.
- The only thing I have to add at this point is how much more comfortable they are with touching and being close again by PINOF 8. You can tell they are out of being paranoid af about fans analyzing everything and coming more into just, being themselves again and not avoiding each others space.
- Phil not knowing his own diss track but knowing Dans is the most whipped behaviour I have ever witnessed.
- The nightstand exposure, like Dan just fully naming everything (almost I'd say) that Phil has in his night stand haha.
- They skipped some good parts big sad times, I get why because there simply isn't enough time to do four videos in one but still sad.
- "Sometimes I slept in it" WHAT DO YOU MEAN SOMETIMES This deadass confirms what we thought about the bedroom being a filming set and not actually their his bedroom, which is wild to me.
- PHATASS mention, Dan we know you love Phil's ass by now but thank you.
- "How did the floorplan stalkers even survive this era" oh Dan...
- Soft gay, they are acutely aware of all the things we picked up on as 'gay proof' and are not acknowledging that we weren't all that off really, they were just deeply closeted.
- THE AMOUNT OF NEW SELFIES WE ARE GETTING. The couch one, the ice deep throating... also the ones of Phil are so much more tame than Dan's.
- Dan is a PINOF 9 truther, interesting
- THE BUTT RIBENA FLIP. Glad they included this in their reaction because we were waiting for it.
- Dan can't stop looking at Phil, like this is so fascinating to me but we know Dan's side profile so much better than ever because he genuinely can't stop looking at Phil
- I think them ending it at 10 was perfect, it really is so sacred now.
- PHIL HAS DISCORD (I am so tempted to sent him a friend request. Update: I did and he doesn't take friend requests lol)
- Have these seen the our discussions about who would win a fight?!
- They really look so fond of their past selves, it makes me happy that they can actually appreciate their journey.
I can say that this journey through the 10 years of their career made my chest swell with fondness because they really have grown and been through so much. Being able to look back on this and see how much they have grown since then makes me so honored that we have been able to share their journey for this long.
See you tomorrow for another #sam reacts!
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pinof · 1 year
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dan's grandma explains the internet
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best-phan-video-poll · 6 months
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Round 3, wave 6
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manofmydaydreams · 1 year
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Dan's Grandma Explains the Internet
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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astradyke · 26 days
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have the courage to exist
mare • they/she/he • 18
asexual lesbian who would risk it all for phil lester
dan + phil sideblog, courtesy of my recent & abrupt hyperfixation
first video: daniel & depression (2018)
(current) favorite amazingphil videos: what dan and phil text each other 4, making whipped tiktok coffee - easter edition, dan is leaving me, keeping or yeeting my entire closet with dan, doing a makeup tutorial inspired by my fish
(current) favorite daniel howell videos: dan's grandma explains the internet, viewers pick dan's outfits, my bahamas travel disaster, dan takes quizzes about himself, i nearly blinded myself
(current) favorite dan and phil games videos: forcing dan to watch all my tiktok likes, halloween baking - slime and sadness cinnamon rolls, dan and phil's traumatic golf incident, dan and phil are getting divorced - it takes two #1, dan and phil's raging trombones
i follow from violexides
banner // icon
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lonespektr · 7 months
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OCTOBER 14TH (day late) HORROR WATCH
Something in the dirt (2022)
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This is Justin Benson and Aaron Moorhead if you haven't heard of these guys strap the frack in.
I have never fully understood any one of their films without at least a second watch
... maybe synchronic
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Already on tilt
OCD?
Looks like a morel mushroom but with spikes??
Do not expect an explanation
Ok well guy apparent derelict no furniture sleeping on floor daylight
Helicopter
No subs are
Oh they are okay
The two have been lead actors in their films more than once
Neighbor meet and greet
Divorcee tells him that the apt had been vacant for a decade
Told a big bloody fib about a death
Doesn't explain the vacancy like that's even creepier man
Said something else weird and drove off on a scoot scoot
It was a squirrel omg
Shot of the electricity meters
And a bunch of other things in quick sucession power lines etc then chimes
Ok interview suddenly
Meta about their films lolz
Somebody died
Guy friendship makes me seeth with envy and wrench my clothing
They are best friends now,?!!! U movin furniture??
How??? U just met??? That could be a serial killer an asshole! That's a literal stranger
I hate men
They are chatting like they have known each other for years (they do)
Fish story
They both at each time appeared wary of the other at least
sharing wifi??
That is a STRANG-ER
Behold the promise LAN
First uh tension
Kinda told him after he helped gotta kick u out
Except rolled right into compassion AA convo
Lol 😂 till he said ok cool
Lol housewarming plant dude why would u think he brought a rando plant to a new place obviously
His grandma runs a nursery
Already talking weird, cult vibes
The prism crystal piece he found on the ground just started floating and prisiming
Divorcee saw it and honestly told the new move in guy who was already trying to kick him out but graciously instead of doing the whole wait until it happens later bs as divorcee is leaving it happens again
And unlike the white men they are the bolt out of the apartment
They are literal shots of the text of what is being said randomly interspersed cut into the dialogue
Fights keep passing over head
Three birds just hit the divorcee guys door , dead
They agree that they have to document legitimate supernatural stuff and get rich/ successful
Youth shelter person comes to pick him up
Dude pretty sure that's his PO and he's court mandated
Back to interviews
New guy had stashed the birds in a cardboard box just to make sure they weren't just knocked out
One bird was gone when he went back to check
Lord of heat coming from the closet
Anti title drop??? Cute
This is very meta
Debate about titles they are both rejection sensative like prickly about critiques
He said i guess it waits for you (new guy) but the first time we saw it it was only the divorcee
This is very nope at this juncture
They are tooling up, my Internet is very slow
The chimes are Russian nesting Dolls
Address the obvious P.O.
He said he's on the sex offender registry for peeing in public
The thing is actually moving ( i should clarify it looks like the og big ass crystal ash trashs
Although it's obvious cut in half orb and prismy
They have digital and film cameras
They may have a shot
The geometry of magnetism - rando book that divorcee knows
Lol why was it written in esperanto i mean obvs why but 😂😂
Oh the weird shape that prsim makes is on the cover
Lol divorcee just asked do i sound unhinged and new guys like oh no nono psychologic breaks are totally different 😂😂😂
Lol he just yelled at the paper weight if you are a ghost do something
Now they are like??? Not a ghost
Coulda told you that boys it's very scientific
It's scientific because this is your film and you always do science shit 😂😂
The guy says he has seeing the symbol all over town now
Most of the shots were of old buildings that symbol would have been there for years
Lol new guy said u goin dan brown on me
He's like no man it's just a math thing like the fibbinocci sequence
When a rectangle expressed as a ratio
(how the fuck does one do that #dyscalculia)
It is that irrational number
Lol he said this better not be about Stonehenge 😂😂
This dude is smoking inside like a fucking 1950's film JEEBUS
the whole time there's s discordant plunk in the sound track
(They do this)
This is the third time he has crossed the threshold out of the room and it drops the new guy im googling their names cause im getting irritated
John and levi
The city scape looms large
Planes sirens
They are both a hot mess
Door knob to hot closet that never shits is shaking
Pause for the cause
(the cause being my bedtime)
Gonna switch to something with a better signal and finish that first
OMG wtf the light refractor is floating why was it in the closet?
Omg plot point i couldn't hear
Gravity?
Soil samples (documentary)
High chromium
Earthquake
Wait is the inside of the closet glowing
Now the light is communicating with them
Quartz deposit
More meta
Why did you play youselves reenactment
I love that's is just a series of conspiracy theories
I read this ted talk, i saw this reddit post
Cyotes again
Ace
Pulling random unexplainable things weaving them together
Snake skin
Just random things
Found an old ass recorder like old ass
With sacred number tape on it
Pythagoras
The rose croutons?
Dream logic
Numerology crystals
City planner 1908
Like full ideas of reference
Literally just picked up a rock at 1908 coordinates that had a strip of paper with w website in it
The guy with hx of mental illness ace is uh keeps trying to back out - John new guy
Crystal resonates with sound
There's the symphony conspiracy theory
The crystal almost fell on his head when he was asleep but did why do you sleep in that room with it
Let alone the apartment at all
Levi
Not they are full on literally every single idea of reference
Now they are talking about simulations after seeing a glitch in the stop crosswalk
Mind control cat parasites - which i just heard about
This month
The phenomenon is dried up
John wants to leave as planned
The levi guy made up a bunch of shit and broke in somewhere told john some kies starting to fabric stuff
Lol this tablet was used to design the city
Now my plant is alien in nature ,(from my own grandmas nursery)
Eat the cactus fruit
Inside the cactus fruit is morse code!!!!!!
Here they are
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Lol he's been lying from the jump even about the book
Coordinates
Old ass radio on a loop
Redacted script
Very convenient
John tried to do another idea of reference but lim? Levi shut him down
About his spearfishing
Radiation?
Old ass raio
Levi in an effort to fabricate more stuff erased the original stuff
Melted the hard drive
Just when john wanted to go again
The phenomenon started back up
And the guy keeps digging into his criminal history
Even then he wants him to stay
They are fully fighting and dragging each other
Oo literally dragged his sister into it then when he broke he smiled
Like a sicko
It's a full scale read fest very intense
WHILE THE MOST PHENOMENON THAT HAD EVER HAPPENED IS HAPPENING
and they are ignoring it fighting each other
There's an earthquake and not they are drawing a truce
Levi is floating the crystal went high and cracked
John ? Was floating too?
But off the balcony???
Fin
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goldenpinof · 1 year
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🥺🥺🥺
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glitterrhowell · 6 years
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Title: The Cutest Pumpkin in the patch
Series: Spooky week 2018
Pairing:  Daniel Howell & AmazingPhil (Phan
Word count: 1.3k
Warning/Genre: fluff, cute, adorable, Halloween, carving pumpkins,bants, boyfriends
Every time he does a video with Phil, Phil always feels the need to make it extra challenging. The thing is how do you make carving pumpkins more challenging? Dan's not so sure he wants to know the answer to that.
Read on Ao3
Read on Wattpad
This is part of a collection of eight stories I have written over the last few months for Autumn/Halloween. I am titling this series spooky week and will continue to update every day up until Halloween day!
A huge thank you to my other half Christy (Fadingcrystalvoid) for being with me since the start of the series listing to me rant and proofreading for me. Also for last minute betaing all these stories for me!
“Hello, Dan and Phil game pumpkins!”
“Phil, Phil no! Wrong channel.”
“Oh yeah. Umm Hey guys! So today Dan and I are going to be” Dan rolled his eyes as Phil waited for dramatic effect, “carving pumpkins!”
“Yes I know what you're all thinking, can we trust Mr. clumsy over here with a knife? And the answer is no. So we're probably going to die,” Dan quickly interjected him.
“Come on I’m not that clumsy!” Phil said rolling his eyes.
“Phil you literally tripped over your own foot yesterday,” Dan teased him.
“Anyway as you can see we’ve already been to the shop and picked out our pumpkins!”
“Phil, what the fuck kind of pumpkin is that?” Dan laughed pointing at Phil’s oddly long shaped pumpkin.
“What?” he exclaimed.
“It looks like a dick!” Dan howled with laughter.
“Dan you can’t say that on my channel! There might be grandmas watching! I’m gonna have to edit that out.” he playfully glared at Dan.
He whipped the tears from his eyes, “Ok Phil tell us exactly what we're going to be doing?”
He turned back to the camera, “So I thought we could throw in a challenging aspect in while we carve out pumpkins!”
“Phiiil! Why does everything have to be a challenge with you?” he whined.
Phil shushed him and chuckled, “Ok you ready to hear the challenge?”
“Might as well, go on.” Dan sighed looking at the camera.
Phil smiled once again to the camera, “Well I thought we could try to do this…” he paused again for dramatic effect, “blindfolded!”
“Phil! Are you fucking crazy?” Dan screamed. “We can not do that!”
“Language Daniel!’ Phil chided him again. “And why not?” Phil asked pouting.
“Well, we’ve already established how clumsy you are. What if you cut off your finger or something! I’ll have to drag your lifeless body to A&E and explain how you did it. They’d be like, ‘how did this happen laddy?’ and I’ll have to be like ‘he decided it would be a genius idea to carve pumpkins blindfolded.’ We’ll look insane you realise.”
“Oh come on Dan, don’t you think you're being a tad dramatic?” he asked, rolling his eyes.
Dan glared at Phil and then turned to the camera and give it his signature “Can you believe this guy” look.
“I guess you're right…” he trailed off apparently, give what Dan said a second thought. But quickly his eyes lite up “But we could try doing it one-handed!” he grinning at the camera.
Dan rolled his eyes and turned to the camera, “Well this is it, everyone, the last amazingphil video ever.”
“Shut up!” Phil slapped him lightly on the shoulder. “So what do you think?”
Dan sighed, “I guess we could try it-”
“Yay! “ he was cut off by a victory yell from Phil.
Phil turned the camera off and started moving their pumpkins and tools to the table where they planned on carving them.
“Phil are you sure about this?” Dan asked him sitting his own pumpkin down.
“Come on Dan it’s going to be so much fun! And think it would make the video extra long.”
Dan smirked at him, “Yeah and that means more ads, Ok capital Lester,” Dan snickered at him.
“Hey! That’s not what I meant! I meant the fans enjoy the longer videos.” Red spreading across his cheeks.
Phil positioned the camera so it would get both of them in frame before he turned it back. “Hi, guys! So we’ve moved to the table now,” he said explaining why they had changed locations.
He turned to Dan, “Alright Dan you ready to go?”
“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Dan said sending one of his fake help me looks at the camera.
“Ok on the count of three!”
“One”
“Two…”
“Three!” Phil shouted.
Dan put his right arm behind his back and dove for the knife with his left eager to get to work
It was extremely difficult with one hand behind their backs but eventually, they got into the groove of it and worked in silence every so often sending insults to the other about their carving skills or pumpkin.
Eventually, Dan gave up and tried using his mouth to hold his pumpkin in place as he set to work making cuts and slashes into the pumpkin.
Despite the challenge, Dan’s pumpkin was turning out exactly as he planned. He grinned while he admired his work when he heard Phil next to him, “Oh no!”
Dan spun his head around, ”What happened? Did you cut yourself?” Dan asked starting to panic.
Phil hugged his pumpkin to his chest so Dan couldn’t see it, “No but I completely messed up my design.” he whined.
Dan laughed, “Come on Phil it can’t be that bad, let me see.”
Dan reached for Phil’s pumpkin but Phil yanked it back, “Wait, I think I can save it.” Phil set his pumpkin back down and went back to work making sloppy one handed cuts into his pumpkin.
Sighing Dan turned his attention back to his pumpkin to finish.
About five minutes later Dan was done and put down his carving tools, he smiled at his work. “Well I don’t know about you guys but I think I definitely did the better pumpkin,” he boasted to the camera.
“Hey, they haven't even seen either one of them yet!”
“Well, are you ready?” Dan asked.
“Hold on one more minute and it should be done.” Phil went back to his pumpkin.
Dan giggled, Phil was concentrating so hard his tongue stuck out of the side of his mouth.
“Ok, it’s done!” Phil said proudly.
“Ok, I want to show mine first,” Dan said excitedly.
Dan turned his pumpkin to the camera and then after a few seconds turned it to Phil to see.
Dan had carved or tried to carve what looked a dog. It wasn’t bad but it wasn’t the greatest thing Phil had ever seen. None the less Phil complimented it and excitedly picking his pumpkin up ready to show it off.
“Ok go on Phil show us what you have.”
Doing the same thing as Dan, he showed the camera and then Dan.
Dan bust out laughing, “What the hell is that?” he said pointing at the unrecognizable design on Phils Pumpkin.
“What do you mean?” Phil pouted, “Can’t you tell?”
Shaking with laughter, Dan shook his head no.
“Well can’t you see that’s a dragon.” he pointed to a blob on the top of the pumpkin, “And see that’s a dog.” pointing to a weirdly shaped dog that had six legs that sat on the dragon, “and see instead of blowing fire its glitter!” Dan squinted his eyes and noticed Phil had used a colored marker to make glitter coming from the dragon’s mouth.
Dan hated seeing the hurt look on Phil's face so of course, he told him that he could indeed see what Phil said was there. When it came time to decide a winner Dan gladly gave up any notion of winning instead saying he thought Phil’s was the best. His heart fluttered with warmth and joy at the excitement on Phil’s face when he complimented his work.
Grinning Phil turned to the camera, “Well that’s it, guys! I’m the winner! If you want to see more videos click over here and if you want to see more of Dan click over there.” he pointed to the appropriate directions on the screen.
“Bye guys!” Phil waved at the camera
“Goodbye internet!”
With that, Phil turned the camera off and turned to Dan, “So that was fun and I didn't cut a finger off,” he grinned.
His heart flopped in his chest, seeing Phil happy always had that effect on him.
“Yeah it was great,” he smiled back.
“Hey Phil, can you wait to start editing until later? I really want to order some pizza and cuddle on the couch and watch anime.” Dan turned his eyes away from Phil’s, suddenly growing very embarrassed at his request.
But instead of laughing at him, Phil put a hand on his shoulder. ”Of course! I would love that,” he smiled.
Grinning Dan started cleaning up the kitchen as Phil ordered the pizza. Tonight it was just going to be them and Dan couldn’t be happier.
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anotherfandomok · 6 years
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Interactive Introverts Richmond Summary! (Part two!)
We come back. The are so dramatic and extra oh my god the smoke and the lights and the wheel is revealed with Phil strapped to it and he's freaking out he is so good at acting you guys it's underrated. He's like help what have you done to me I didn't think you would choose me etc it's some Good Shit. Dan goes "well hello everybody" and does like a maniacal laugh, and then he says the outfits they have for this segment are their pajamas. Low-key I didn't even realize Dan was on stage too until he started talking bc I was so focused on Phil strapped to the wheel lmao.
Dan is like the point of this is to not hit Phil and Phil was like please don't! And then Dan said but if I do hit him and he dies it's all your fault because you wanted this etc. And Dan was like various projectiles and all that blah blah start with the slingshot ("let's see what Danny has in his trunk of fun" sktnrjeej) (the original - if it could kill a mammoth, it could kill Phil) sifbfje it came really close to Phil's leg. He got out the bow and arrow and called himself Dandiss Danverdeen and then he was like I don't actually really know how to work this and Phil was like oh that's great to hear and Dan was like I THINK ITS LIKE THIS YOU JUST PULL IT BACK AND FIRE BUT HE WAS FACING THE AUDIENCE SO EVERYOME SCREAMED AND DAN WAS LIKE OKAY CALM DOWN YOU WERE IN DANGER FOR LIKE TWO SECONDS OR W/E AND THEN HE WAS LIKE BUT I don't think you guys understand how intense this is let's get a little sideways motion in this wheel so THE WHEEL STARTS SPINNING BACK AND FORTH A BIT I WAS LIKE SJTBDJFNRJSDJ. The arrow came really close to hitting him in the stomach too (and I don't remember which one it was - I think it was the bow and arrow - but Phil was like two inches to the right and I'd be dead and Dan was like "that's OUR left Phil" oh my god I died). He brought out the Nerf gun and called it a bazooka and said I still don't think you guys are getting how dangerous this is LETS SPIN THE WHEEL ALL THE WAY AROUND. I was definitely not expecting that and I was scared Phil was gonna get sick all over the stage, but I guess they've been practicing it lmao it was INSANE. and Dan did not hit Phil, so it went alright.
Dan kept telling us to calm down and stop freaking out and screaming oh my god like ssjfbsjdjskdjs. He was like "you all screamed, Phil gasped, you need to call the heck down."
Phil asked Dan to help unstrap him and Dan was like I'm not gonna help unstrap you unstrap yourself! Sigbfjdej. Dan tried to talk about his serious thing about how they're real people, but everyone was distracted and laughing by Phil taking off the suit so Phil was like sorry I'll go back here behind the trunk but obviously we could all still see him so Dan was like I'll just wait until you're done.
It was wild you guys I did not think Phil would be on the wheel, and when they spun it all the way around I was SHOOK.
Also the number of times they called each other by their full names had me absolutely dead like every time they did it I just like cried a lil bit.
Anyway, then Dan talked about how they're real people and once we saw Phil was in mortal danger we felt remorse and stuff like that, and then I think he talked about their curated online personalities (or maybe that was later). He talked about how if you have this wide and individual of an audience there's no way everything you do will please everyone (even though they want to please us), and that makes it really hard because do you put your audiences wants over what you want and do you be an individual or just act.
Dan talked about wholesome Howell (he called it a spicy meme) and how "some people on the internet thought I was joking about death too much" and how he copes with bad things by joking about them and stuff, and he talked about making the meme and he did the pose and everything and did the sarcastic voice "I will always be wholesome from now on and I will never be sarcastic again 😇" etc. And he said most people were like yeah right Dan haha funny but then he said there were some people who were actually like thank God "this is so much better than the regular Dan!" finally Dan's gonna be nice or w/e. so he was like "if there's this version of me out there that some people want me to be, should I just be that -" and we all screamed no really loud and he looked shocked and happy and he kinda stepped back a bit and laughed a lil and I died I was like we did good we love you sjfbdndns.
Then Phil talked about his hair change and he and Dan talked about how he was genuinely scared that if he changed his hair people were gonna stop watching him/abandon him ugh ugh ugh bb no we love you but he had had the same hair for so long and just ah. We cheered super louldy when he was like when I changed my hair this year! Dan was like this was a big deal it was important news up there with the royal wedding man Dan loves to gas his boy up I'm fine. He was like but look all these people are still here and we all cheered super loudly bc we love our boy (and then Dan was like or it was just too late to get a refund on the tickets 🤷🏻‍♂️).
THEN THEY TALKED ABOUT ANOTHER OFF BRAND THING FOR PHIL WHEN HE SAID FUCK ON DANS CHANNEL I WAS LIKE AJTBCDJGJSKDN AND DAN WAS LIKE "and he's gonna say it again right now" I was like AJGBHHJDJS but he didn't obviously (they actually kept the show pretty pg 13 I was impressed like there were no f bombs - just a ton of innuendos).
TIME FOR THE PERSONALITY SWAP. DAN CALLED IT ROLE REVERSAL SJFBFDJ. So Dan talked about how they have these opposite personalities kinda thing, and then Phil represents "everything's that nice and sweet and wholesome in the world." AND THEY PUT THE PIC OF ANGEL PHIL UP ON THE SCREEN I DIED GUYS IT WAS SO PRETTY. I LOVE HIM. AND THEN DAN IS LIKE THE DEVIL RIGHT AND HOLY SHIT THE DEVIL PICTURE OF HIM THEY PUT UP HAD ME SHOOK IN THE WHITE SHIRT WITH THE DEVIL HORNS AND THE FUCKING LIPSTICK Y'ALL I DIED HE LOOKED SO GOOD AJRBFJDJSM. Dan commented on how he was rocking the lipstick. then they switched and they like crossed sides of the stage it was really gorgeous tbh I'm obsessed with them walking now so it was like well coordinated and just wow.
ANGEL DAN IS BEAUTIFUL AND I LOVE HIM. He's gonna have to explain why the things that we said on the interact website were bad are actually good (they played really soft music whenever he did his it made me really emo). AND PHIL IS GONNA HAVE TO MAKE THE GOOD THINGS BAD AND OH MY GOD WHEN THAT PICTURE OF DEVIL PHIL CAME UP ON THE SCREEN EVERYONE IN THE ROOM JUST FUCKING LOST IT THE LIPSTICK YOU GUYS I FUCKING CAN'T OKAY AJFBGJSEJSJ oh my god. Y'all when Phil was devil Phil he SWAGGERED he STRUT like I was like oh my god this man could kill us all instantly if he wanted to like he just exuded power and I was Afraid it was incredible. HE CALLED HIMSELF X RATED LESTER AND DAN WAS LIKE I HAVE TO SAY FOR THE RECORD I DO NOT SUPPORT THAT I WISH YOU HAD SAID LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE. AND PHIL GOES "I ONLY FEEL MORE DIRTYY" I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WE'RE ALL DEAD. ALSO HE WOULD ALWAYS CROSS HIS ARMS AND THEN STAND WITH HIS FEET SUPER FAR APART LIKE YOU KNOW THE WIDE LEGGED STANCE HE DOES LIKE THAT FUCKED ME UP I WAS SHAKING OH MY GOD HE EXUDED SO MUCH POWER AND TBH BDE I WAS SHOOK WHENEVER HE STOOD LIKE THAT SJTBDJ.
Dan said color being sucked out of the world was a good thing bc BLACK IS THE BEST COLOR AND EVERYTHING WOULD BE BETTER IN MONOCHROME THATS A WORLD I WANT TO LIVE IN "spell funeral without fun amirite" and "everything would be fashionable!" and we were all shook and cheered really loudly and Phil was like I don't want to live in that world and Dan said "well Phil you weren't invited anyway!" I was like sjgbfndjss.
Phil said "time for me to get... A little bit evil" and he STRUTS to the middle of the stage and starts gyrating his hips oh my fucking god we were all dead like what the fuck. Dan was like "sToP gYrAtiNG!!1!" (Dan added that to the list of forbidden movements that had been growing throughout the show that mainly including thrusting and other such movements oh my god). My favorite thing about this segment is the audience and other person would see the thing they had to defend first, so we would all just burst out laughing and then the person who had to defend it was always like "what??? What is it why are you all laughing what is it??"
Phil said community service would be a bad thing bc what if it's a community of cannibals right lmao and then afterwards he was like I think I would taste pretty good and Dan was like yeah whatever pure sugar tastes like ew gross ajfbfjwjd.
Dan said grandma seeing your Wattpad was good but we didn't give that one to him he was like we have to bridge the generational gap and share our interests and the internet with old people and then he was like plus she'll probably be like oh yeah I wrote when I was younger about the Beatles in a bathtub AND SOME MILK. DAN NO STOP OH MY GOD NO. NO. he kept being like but I'm sure someone probably wrote that about the Beatles. I was like no please no oh my god we were all like no.
Phil said sitting in a field of flowers is bad bc you pick up the flower, give it a big sniff, and then you hear... Buzzing? THERES A BEE IN THE FLOWER AND ITS IN YOUR NOSE AND NOW ITS BURROWING INTO YOUR BRAIN so we definitely gave him that one lmao I think Dan said something about him or us being traumatized, but it was SO INTENSE when Phil was saying it like they played that hardcore music that had me dead on the floor and Phil was so into it and I just. Died.
Dan said his square hair was good bc everyone has to have a lowest point in their life and now he can look back at pictures and be like well at least my head isn't shaped like a square lmao he was like all of you go out and get your hair cut like that tomorrow I promise you there'll be nowhere to go but up I was like sjgbjdjfdj it was good omg. But he flipped out when he had to defend it he was like oh my god no sjfbfje.
Phil said a double rainbow was bad because apparently there's a double rainbow song and it always gets stuck in your head?? So Dan was like oh my god you got it stuck in my head and he was like there are like five songs permanently stuck in my head it's that one and there's Chandelier by Sia I'll be doing anything and my brain is like *he sang part of chandelier I was shook help my emotions god I love it when he sings* and he did a lil acting about the anger and frustration when it's in his head LMAO.
EVERY TIME PHIL GOT ONE RIGHT HE WOULD DO THE CUTEST LITTLE JUMP UP IN THE AIR Y'ALL I CANT HANDLE IT IT WAS SO ADORABLE IM DEAD IM DEAD. AND THEN WHEN HE WAS JUST STANDING HE WOULD LIKE SWAY HIS HIPS BACK AND FORTH/SIDE TO SIDE WITH HIS ARMS CROSSED. AND Y'ALL. Y'ALL????? MISS BAYLEY??? MISS BAYLEY?? OH MY FUCKING GOD SHE FUCKING DEAD. I CANT.
Then Dan "time to stop this before we get arrested." What did we learn from that experiment? Phil: "that I have a dark seed growing in my soul" y'all he said it in his really low voice I was s h o o k. Like Phil Lester had officially graduated to 'looks like they could kill you and could actually kill you.' Dan: "somewhere in the dank cave of my soul,,,, there is a single beam of sunlight that broke through the ceiling." --- happy middle ground between doing what you want and what other people want aw.
They were like you guys want to know about Dan and Phil's real relationship. Fast forward to we secretly hate each other and Dan was like I'm just an actor Phil hired ten years ago and it got quickly out of hand and I was like ajfbcnsjd. You only know the good side of Dan and Phil when we're happy and loving and having a good time. "But there's angst, and tension, and cereal stealing related betrayals." To know the real Dan and Phil you have to see the dark side. "Time to push our little bond until it breaks. In,, the DAN VS PHIL EXTREME FRIENDSHIP TEST."
Time to test their friendship to the max! Buzzer time ladies, gents, and nonbinary friends. I'm dead. They had the prettiest background on the screen for this where they had their fists up and were pretending to fight each other I can't deal with it. "The easiest way to cause each other pain - electrocution" I sjtbfjdndjw. "We will literally be punishing each other for being bad friends."
Psychic connections first (they think of the same thing from a category, or else "zappy zappy ouch time") their category was dairy products, they beamed it to each other, and Phil said STRAWVERRY MILKSHAKE. LMAO DAN GOT SO MAD HE ROASTED HIM HE WAS LIKE WHY WOULD I SAY STRAWBERRY MILKSHAKE PHIL WHAT THE HECK WHY DIDNT YOU JUST SAY MILK. it was hilarious oh my god. HE CALLED HIM AN IDIOT AND PHIL WAS LIKE STRAWBERRY MILKSHAKE SOUNDS NICER. AND Y'ALL EVERY TIME THEY GOT SHOCKED THEY WOULD JUMP AND SHAKE THEIR HANDS AND HOMESTLY ITS THE CUTEST THING IN THE ENTIRE WORLD ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY BOTH GET ZAPPED AT THE SAME TIME LIKE WHAT THE FUCK IM OBSESSED WITH IT.
DAN PHIL OR A RAT I DIDN'T KNOW THIS WAS GONNA BE IN THE SHOW DAN SAID PHIL WANTED TO PUT IT IN AJTBJDEJS OMG YES. Phil thought his was his hair, but it was a rat so he got zapped (they turned up the power/volume between each challenge sjrbfjs), and Dan thought his was Phil but it was actually himself so he got zapped. WHEN PHIL GOT ZAPPED HE WAS JUMPING AROUND AND HE WENT WHAT THE FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUU- DGESICKLES AND EVERYONE IN THE ROOM DIED. After Dan saw his was himself he goes "who submitted that photo" lmao.
Dilemma time! They have to save each other or sacrifice something for the other. Phil is being attacked by a shark, but to save him Dan has to have his square hair for a year. Dan called the person who submitted it a sadist lmao. But y'all Dan is so whipped Dan would do anything for Phil at first he was like you don't really need one of your limbs you don't really use them for anything and Phil was like what?!? yes I do I'm so clumsy I need all my limbs and Dan eventually was like yeah it would suck and you guys would all laugh at me, but I would do it to keep Phil from being eaten by a shark. (The shark is a big shark and it likes a nibble on British boys, as Phil said.)
Dan is being abducted by aliens ("the Dan mpreg story you all want," as put so nicely by Dan himself), but Phil has to give up both his arms to save him (lmao very common limb losing theme here). Phil is not going for it "I need those to do things!" he's clumsy etc Dan is like just make a decision already and Phil goes "it's only a little probing, they'll return you to earth, you can go on one of those mystery weird science tv shows and make loads of money from that!" (capita£ester strikes again) is that your decision Phil yes and he prepares himself to get shocked and Bam aw haha.
Phil lost, Dan gets a point. The loser gets the HIGHEST SHOCK POWER BITCHES. they turn it up from red to blue. Phil holds out his hand with the shock thing in it, Dan says "Any last words?" And PHIL GOES "Dad." WHAT. akrbgjebejdjejsb. Then he gets SHOCKED.
They've been keeping track for the whole tour of who wins and who loses. Dan has 18 wins but Phil has 21!!!!! Clearly the better friend.
My phone was getting low on battery so I don't have any videos or audio for like twenty minutes but I remember most of it.
That zapping was intense, time to chill for a bit, the audience doesn't really want to. They put the shock things away, and Phil goes and sits on the front of the stage ;-; look at his legs help me guys he's so long and adorable help. He has his notecards they turn off all the screens and effects except for two lights, and Dan sits on one of the benches it's cute af I love him. Phil is like I have some questions from the audience we're gonna get a bit more intimate (send help).
They say hi to all the people who ask questions really soft (or Dan does) but Phil says the first like three pretty intensely/seriously and Dan is like Phil that is not casual! It's cute af.
Someone asks whether to get a moon or star tattoo - they ask the audience and the audience chooses moon. How to get their mom to accept it? Dan: "wait until you turn eighteen and then speed out of there bye! No I'm kidding don't do that." Phil says tell Mom you got an enormous back tattoo of a three legged horse, and when she's freaking out tell her JK it's just a little moon on my ankle! Dan laughs but he's like or you could just say this is really important to me and I want to appreciate things that are pretty and blah blah blah he gives actual deep and good advice he says it really fast I love him I love him I love him I'm gonna cry and they're like but the horse thing would probably work too haha.
Questions about Dan and Phil! The AmazingPhil video??? They talked about how they filmed it on the tour bus and how weird their texts are and how they have their alien language "ice cream, BLURRRGHHHH" etc it's cute, and Phil's like editing on the tour bus but he hopes it'll be up tomorrow or the next day (so that would be today or tomorrow since I'm posting this so late) and Dan's like as long as he doesn't vomit on his laptop editing on the tour bus hopefully tomorrow or day after. It's soft I'm so excited for the video guys :').
What have they experienced that they wish they had filmed? Not a lot they value living life without screens sometimes, Phil especially says he likes just having memories in his head. They talked about how weird it would be to have like the contact lens cameras where you can just see everything you do all the time, but they wouldn't like those. But Dan talked about how at Phil's (old) house up in the mountains they once saw (green) ball lightning even though everyone says it doesn't exist they saw it during a storm (were they watching a storm together at Phil's house I'm 😭) lightning hit like this building and then they saw the ball floating there for a few seconds and then it exploded and caught a tree on fire or something and they looked at each other and were like did you see that and y'all it was v soft none of their friends believe them but I believe them that's soft.
Then Phil says once when he was in Florida with his family they were out on a dock and a family of manatees swam under the dock and there were two babies and he saw them really closely and help me that's adorable they were both talking about how cute the babies were ah it was so sweet and soft.
Then it's the end of the segment and the question and Dan stands up and goes "alternately, the Vegas video" WHAT THE FUCK I COULDNT EVEN SCREAM I LITERALLY WOULD NOT HAVE IN A MILLION YEARS GUESSED THAT HE WOULD HAVE MENTIONED THAT. My soul left my body.
Ok! Back, and time for the golden I awards!!! They had talked about the set and the phallic i s on the sides of the set when they first came out, and what they stood for and all that stuff, but now they were like this show is for you so we have the first ever Richmond golden I awards I was shook.
Most inaccurate II predictions some nominees were "Dan and Phil leave the stage. We run the show now." And they talked about how we could all go up on stage and sing Welcome To The Black Parade (towards the beginning Dan apologized for g-noting us lmao wow). WINNER ISSSS Gerard Way comes out on an elephant and tramples Dan and Phil. They laughed and then they were both like honestly I'd be down with that I'd be okay with that. PHIL SAID "TRAMPLE ME DAD" WKGNJSJETHTS.
Pets! (Phil: "our furry friends!!" Dan: "not furry - fluffy! Fluffy friends. Pets!") Cute smol white fluffy dog in an II hoodie I think or maybe just a black hoodie as Dan in bed, and Dan was like wow that's literally me it was cute skskfksksk. A cat wearing askew glasses and a plaid shirt was Phil and Dan laughed and was like "I love how your entire personality can be summed up with glasses and a plaid shirt." It was cute af. Winner was a cat with an eclipse and a coconut on it's head as Dan awww.
Parents! I didn't know they did this, but they had pics of three parents and gave the winner to the best sour puss grump who didn't want to come we gave all the parents a round of applause for coming and all that good stuff it was nice and Phil/they used they/them pronouns for all the parents like 😭😭😭😭😭 I'm fucked up it was so good.
Also they wore THESE REALLY PRETTY AND REALLY SPARJLY JACKETS FOR THE AWARDS LIKE THEY RAN OFF AND THEN CAME BACK AND. WE WERE ALL SCREAMING AND DANS WAS SILVER BUT PHILS WAS GOLD LIKE THE TATINOF ONES AND THEY WERE SO SOARKLY AND SO PRETTY AND 😭😭.
Then one last award right we get Phil's diss track, Dan playing piano, OR a random video of a dog that has nothing to do with Dan or Phil. At this point I was very confused bc I had seen the spoilers and thought I knew both the first two things happened. So they said the dog video won and I was like sjfbsjsj what. It was a v cute dog slo mo running through snow and they talked about how cute and majestic it was and Phil said "trample me" akfbcjsj again. But then Phil went and got his hat AJTBDJSJD THE HAT HE MEANS BUSINESS AND BAM LAUNCHES INTO HIS DISS TRACK OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU GUYS I THOUGHT I WAS READY BUT I WASNT I THOUGHT I WAS READY TO HEAR HIM SAY BITCH BUT I WAS NOT.
Y'all honest to god he rapped really freaking well like he has the rhythm down he's practiced so much I'm so proud of him sjfnfje.
Then HERES DAN WITH A PIANO (I need to study the lyrics bc I videoed it but it was a lot to take in and kind of hard to hear the lyrics with everyone screaming.) Omg bb he looked so pretty.
And they sang together I love them so much and then they came back on stage and waved to everyone and we stood up and held up our signs and then they went back to be moved away from the stage with the piano and they crouched and waved really far down until they couldn't see us anymore 😭.
Also Dan said the super best friends and soulmates thing, and he said when Phil is a hundred wait no ninety he'll remember when we came to Richmond and talked about Satan and furries and sjfnfdnjdej my heart?
Towards the beginning we screamed super loud for something and Dan said we broke the sound barrier and we just screamed louder ;-;
At the beginning Phil said most of the internet is in cables under Virginia, which I didn't know, so Dan said all our Wattpad smut is stored underneath us. They did their research XD. Also the way they said Virginia had me shook, but I was one hundred percent expecting them to say it in their American accents and then make a virgin joke, but they didn't! I wish they had done their American accents more, but it was literally such an incredible show and I can't believe it's over.
During the piano bit Phil sang his part and then got down on his knees and Dan was like sorry sorry Phil you're in my light this is the Dan and Phil show not the Phil and background piano guy show and Phil was like oh sorry and Dan was like should we sing it together? And ;-;.
There was one point where I was so close to crying when they were talking about how important we are to them and how they just want to please us and shit and like. 😭
I'm forgetting so much stuff and this is so long...
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iiarchive · 6 years
Text
Denver June 29th
See anything wrong/missing? Please let us know!
Please click ‘read more’ to view the details from the show! It WILL contain spoilers from the show!
‘Props’/Opening of the Show
Starts with what they are not going to do
Mentions ‘erotic role play’
Dan as a criminal, Phil as a policeman, voiceover of implied smut
Dan and Phil ‘strip’
Truth Bombs
Dan: whats hidden in their browsing history?
A: are tears a good moisturizer? (winner), edgy fursuit ideas, sexy shrek fanfic 
Phil: what job would they have if youtube didn't exist?
A: unpredictable weatherman, support human for a distressed animal, pg stripper (winner)
D&P: How will they die?
A: Dan will kill Phil for stealing cereal, being eaten by the denver mountain wildlife, browse internet til they turn to dust
Ball & Mystery Box
Phil threw a ball into the audience to guess what was ‘inside’ the mystery box
Dan’s secret wattpad password, furry porn (pg-13 furry art), valuable memes.
Dan VS Phil
Psychic Connections - type of chocolate (Dan said Hershey, Phil said Milky Way)
Phantastic Phacts
this part has been removed from the show 
Dan, Phil, or a Rat?
Picture: Dan (Dan said rat, he got it wrong) 
Picture: Rat (Phil said Phil, he got it wrong)
D&P Dilemma
For Phil: Phil gets five billion dollars, but Dan leaves a trail of slug slime behind him. Phil chooses to take the money
For Dan: Dan gets to play with puppies every morning, but Phil's hair turns white. Dan chooses the puppies. 
Friendship Test loser - it’s a draw
Wheel of Doom
Dan was sacrificed.  
Good VS Evil
Dan - murder, your grandma seeing what you browse, eating chocolate until you die
Phil - sitting on a beach, free wifi, helping the elderly
Getting Deep
Q: I'm loving your insta stories guys. Did you see any ghosts in the Shining hotel?
A: Phil was very excited because he loves Stephen King books. Phil said he got the chills, Dan said it was probably the aircon
Q: I got a Twenty One Pilots tattoo on my ankle and I'm scared to tell my parents.
A: Dan said to hide it until your 18 but also to explain what it means to you to your parents. Phil suggested getting a tattoo of Dan’s face on your back so the ankle tattoo isn’t so bad.
Q: How do I say hi to my crush? I am dying in a pool of awkward.
A: Dan and Phil both said to only pursue it if they like you and to not waste their time on someone that doesn’t like you
Golden II Awards
They wore glitter suits
Give fandom awards to the audience
Phil’s Diss Track
Assumed lyrics to Phil’s Diss Track thus far
Dan on Piano
Dan plays a song on the piano
Has to do with him and Phil’s origin story
Phil interrupts by returning to his diss track momentarily
Interactive Introverts Duet
Dan and Phil sing a duet with Dan playing the piano
About how they’re ‘Interactive Introverts’
*Bonus*
Dan Naruto ran off-stage
Phil said Dan always wonders off at airports
*Current pre-show/intermission playlist*
Thank you to flixchix95 for the audio of this show!
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glittergradient · 6 years
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I just got reminded of the fact that the only time dan sees his his family (aside from his grandma) is Christmas and he only spends a few days there. And then I remembered why, the stuff he explained in like 2010 and now I’m sad :( I have a terrible relationship with my parents but I’m lucky that my extended family is great. I can’t imagine how hard it must be for Dan, only having his grandma on his side.
I’m sorry about your parents, that sucks :(
but don’t be sad about dan! you know, I really don’t think he has a bad relationship with his family. just the fact that he’s been mentioning his mum more lately and that he posted screenshots of their text conversations tells me that he regularly keeps in touch at least with her. And we don’t really know how often he sees them, definitely not as often as phil does, but there might be times that we don’t know about. remember that liveshow earlier this year when he said he’d borrowed phil’s coat to go see him mum who was in london? we didn’t know about that. or when he went to a barbecue that his family had organized (right before going to wimbledon)? remember how his entire family was at tatinof in 2015? and you know how dan has said multiple times that ever since he moved out he started to appreciate his family a lot more?
I mean, maybe dan isn’t as close to his family as phil is, but I don’t think he doesn’t get along with them or that they aren’t there for him. a lot of people go through phases with their families that aren’t the best, especially when they’re in their late teens or just becoming young adults and they’re in that period of their lives where they want to be indipendent, but at the same time they find it hard to detach entirely from their parents. I don’t doubt that dan felt frustration and anger toward his parents at some point (but honestly who doesn’t?), maybe especially around the time when he dropped out of uni and wasn’t sure of his decision and was scared of his future and needed all the support he could get and his parents didn’t quite deliver in that sense. but it’s been years since then and dan is now a rich, successful, grown man who has built a life for himself and who seems to be confident in the career path he’s chosen. his parents have probably come around and he has probably got over whatever negative feelings he harbored towards them.
having said that, the reason he doesn’t spend more than a few days with them at christmas is probably due to 1) bad wifi at his parents’ house (how would dan live without a functioning internet connection lol) 2) just the desire to have space for himself and play videogames and binge watch tv shows all day (dan seems to be like that in general, not only with his parents. he tends to isolate himself a bit and the only person who seems to be allowed within his safety bubble is phil) 3) families can be a lot, no matter how much you love them and they love you. it can easily get exhausting having to deal with them, especially at a time like christmas, when there are more people around, more family members gathered together, not only the inner circle, but other relatives you might barely even know 4) the fact that maybe he just doesn’t love going back to his hometown and see familiar faces from his past (not his family specifically, but other acquaintances)
tldr: we don’t know much about dan’s family because he’s a lot more private about them than phil is, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t close to them. I personally think he has a good relationship with them, one that probably improved significantly when he got over his own insicurities and got to a place in his life where he felt mostly settled and secure.
I’m sorry, I wrote an essay. I just have a lot of thoughts about this lol. just remember that things are rarely black or white, especially when it comes to a complex matter such as family, and sometimes the shades in between make all the difference.
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best-phan-video-poll · 8 months
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Round 1, wave 12
youtube
youtube
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