#I love this woman fully and deeply even if we are not actually married and never will be

[niuxita21]

Desi and Cata + “Te amo”

#sin huellas #catalina pardo #desiré montoya #shitty screencap posts (TM) #imagine sleeping on these two lmao couldn't be me #I just love this detail like #they are literally The Straightest like I have never in my life found it harder to ship two female characters like I did with these two #and they were lampshaded to the point where them being mistaken for a couple was just your regular tuesday night for them #and yet it was cata (the straight one) the one who initiated these exchanges #I mean you have whole ass netflix shows subtitling 'I love you' as 'te quiero' when it's two women (looking at you dead to me) #but catalina pardo is out there all like nah bro none of that wishy washy no homo bullshit for me tyvm #I love this woman fully and deeply even if we are not actually married and never will be #it's almost like... the actual opposite of '''''kweerbaiting'''' because desi actually is gay #she just has two very profound relationships of two very different kinds with two different women #it's incredibly rare for me to actually get on board with the gay ship on a show in which there is an alternative pairing I could ship #(cf yellowjackets) #but somehow this show accomplished it and idk if the lampshading of these two played a role in it or not but nonetheless #slow clap show pls give me a second season I have been a good girl and also tv is about to get very dire in a few months

[atopvisenyashill]

Is Lyanna really as terrible as some people portray her as?

no, not even a little bit.

the absolute most important thing about lyanna is that when she dies she is only 16. i am someone who works with kids - i work in a library so i spend most of my days cleaning up after tweens and asking teenagers to please stop doing dumb shit- and the first thing anyone who has ever worked with kids and especially teenagers is that they may look like adults but they are NOT. they don’t understand boundaries, they have next to zero impulse control, and every bad thing that happens feels like the worst thing ever because it very likely IS the worst thing they’ve ever experienced bc they have not been alive that long!

and this goes for every single teen & tween character in this series, not just lyanna! shit, i am someone who feels an immense amount of sympathy for joffrey! on one side he’s got his mother telling him he can do anything he wants with no repercussions and on the other he’s got his father hitting him so hard that stannis thought joffrey was going to die. and then he is given unchecked power and told not to abuse it! EYE cannot even guarantee that i wouldn’t use unchecked power to do shady shit and i am a fully grown adult, not a traumatized, irrationally, and deeply vindictive 13 year old boy.

but honestly the most important thing about lyanna is that we have ZERO CONTEXT for what happens between her and Rhaegar. What we have is

Ned’s sparse & guilt ridden thoughts about Lyanna and one (1) comment about Rhaegar

Robert’s angry, entitled, and grief ridden outbursts about Lyanna and Rhaegar

Barristan’s incredibly romanticized, guilt & grief ridden take on their relationship

Meera’s second hand account of Lyanna, told to her by a father who is likely just as guilt & grief ridden as the others, who likely has his own view of Lyanna

What’s important to note is that our view of her is heavily filtered through the eyes of the men that knew her. Robert loves an idealized version of her that never existed. Barristan never actually knew her. Ned is not only viewing her under 200 layers of guilt and grief, but very obviously does not understand his sister, or why she made the choices she did, and struggles constantly with knowing that he will never know her the way he wishes he could, the way he thought he did. Given the way Meera describes Lyanna, I actually think Howland is our most accurate look at her but even that is buried behind years of grief & a fair amount of hero worship and affection (“that’s my fathers man you’re kicking howled the she-wolf” is a line that makes me WEEP for this exact reason; Howland sees Lyanna as his hero above all else!).

All of that to say - we don't even know what Lyanna did that was so terrible! Even if she was a grown woman capable of making rational decisions, we have no idea what her decisions were. She could have been lied to, misled, kidnapped, threatened, just as surely as she could have walked into the situation with open eyes. Even in the show, with a slightly aged up Lyanna - we get, what, just Sam's opinion on Rhaegar and Lyanna being in love because they got hitched? Completely ignoring the fact that we had several women in this series get married not because they were in love or willing but because someone more powerful decided on it and that was that, so there's still no evidence that Lyanna had enough information about the situation to make any sort of informed, consensual decision.

so no, i do not hold lyanna responsible for anything at all that happened regardless of how it happened because she was not mentally mature enough to understand what the hell was going on. a 15 year old is just not mature enough to think “if i run off with this married man, it’s going to cause a cascade of political issues that could have disastrous consequences.” what she’s probably thinking is “this man says he can help me and i am fucking miserable and no one else will listen.” it’s why we don’t throw 15 year olds who run away to meet up with old dudes they met online in jail when they’re caught (or theoretically why we don’t punish them at any rate). There is one person and one person only who is responsible for the massive fuck up that is the Elia-Rhaenys-Aegon-Lyanna-Jon mess and that is RHAEGAR, the person with the most amount of power who used it in the dumbest way imaginable and got himself, most of his heirs, his wife, and his teenaged mistress killed. The only other people responsible are the Kingsguard who kept Lyanna under lock and key while she lay dying and pleading for her brother to come save her.

#lyanna stark #anti rhaegar targaryen #valyrianscrolls #gender politics in asoiaf #mariages in asoiaf #asks #anons

[teecupangel]

Hello! New ish follower here with a curious ‘what if question’: what if Edward was training Jenny to be an assassin?

So you think she’d fully commit to becoming one after his death/ her abduction? (I’d love her to meet Anne again ahh 😭)

Hello! Welcome! Sorry for the delay (said in the tone of an old woman who suddenly has visitors) :)

First of all, let’s talk about why Edward wouldn’t want Jenny to become an Assassin and wanted her to get married to someone he considered ‘financially stable’.

Edward isn’t the type of person to be swayed by what was considered to be the norm during his time so I like to believe there’s a deeper reasoning to why he was so adamant of stopping Jenny.

The whole “I want my children to be safe” can’t really be the reason because he was training Haytham to be an Assassin when he was young.

Because of this, my headcanon is that Edward fears Jenny’s death and that’s what stopping him from understanding just how deeply Jenny wishes to be an Assassin.

Although he tries to not favor any of his children, Jenny reminds him of his failures as a husband and a father. The dress Jenny wears in the epilogue of Black Flag is very similar to her late mother’s dress so there’s a possibility that she inherited her mother’s taste of dresses (or maybe she actually picks dresses that reminds her of her late mother).

This only serves to remind Edward of Caroline and the growing fear of losing Jenny as well to a similar sickness that could have been cured had it been treated.

Had Caroline had the money needed for the treatment.

And then…

She started showing interest in being an Assassin.

He sees the growing anger in her eyes as she sees him training Haytham instead of her when Haytham doesn’t even know what all of this training was for.

He sees her and he sees someone he lost in her as well.

He sees an Assassin he cared for and lost.

He sees Mary Read.

The more he tries to push her away from her desires to be an Assassin, the more he tries to keep her safe, the angrier she becomes.

The more she becomes jealous of Haytham.

And so…

We need a change.

Something that would snap Edward from his haze of grief and guilt.

Someone who can tell him how he’s seeing his daughter but not seeing her at the same time.

And that person?

Is Anne Bonny.

For this to work, we need Anne to remain with the Brotherhood and it is hinted on that she became an Assassin in Assassin’s Creed Memories’ card of her having her brandish a Hidden Blade (I kinda hc that it’s Mary’s Hidden Blade) so we can have Anne paying a visit to an old friend of hers, just a simple social call. Tessa is suspicious though since she’s a beautiful woman that, as far as she knows, is unattached.

She has a husband though and her own children are training to be Assassins.

That’s why she can see the anger and jealousy in Jenny’s eyes.

And she can also see the guilt and grief in Edward’s eyes.

So she mediates for the both of them.

It takes a while for her to get the two stubborn Kenway and Scott to meet at the middle.

But in reality, it’s more of Jenny getting more of the upper hand because, not only did she get what she wanted (to be trained as an Assassin) but also a bonus (her father stops trying to get her engaged).

Anne left soon after, knowing her inclusion to the start of Jenny’s training would simply lessen Edward’s authority and recruits need to fully trust their instructor.

But she did promise to visit more often to keep an eye on Edward.

Why Edward?

Because she has to make sure Edward doesn’t slip back to those dark thoughts again (she says this playfully but she’s actually quite worried).

That following morning…

Haytham is surprised to see his older sister joining them.

But she just glared at him so he kept quiet.

And so…

Edward starts training Haytham and Jenny together.

.

Unorganized Notes:

Haytham started learning swordfighting at 6 so that’s around 1713 with Jenny being 18.

Jenny’s inclusion makes Haythan’s training more… thorough. While he does need to focus on increasing his stamina, he tends to try out the freerunning techniques that Jenny is taught while he’s doing his own training because they look ‘fun’ and also he’s a bit peeved that Jenny gets to be taught those while he’s been ordered to just… run.

There’s a bit of rivalry going on here. Haytham is more of a prodigy and some of it can be attributed to Tessa’s genes as he does need to be ‘better’ than most to pass on the Auditore-Kenway genes to Ratonhnhaké:ton (and to Desmond). Because of this, Jenny works harder than the two of them to simply catch up, not realizing that catching up to Haytham means being better than most recruits her age.

Jenny gets the title of the ‘Wild Kenway Girl’ because of this though but she just ignores this. This worries Tessa, mainly because she’s worried no one would marry Jenny and that is a bleak future for a woman as far as Tessa can see. Jenny just shrugs it off and jokes that Haytham would take care of his undesirable sister when she’s old and wrinkly. Haytham takes this seriously much to his parents’ amusement and Jenny’s groaning.

By the time Birch makes his move, Jenny would have already been inducted as an Assassin (22), perhaps a novice or a rank higher.

Since you specify Edward’s death, that means that we’re not saving Edward in this one XD

So we’re left with two main ideas after Edward’s death:

(1) Jenny is captured and, by the time she escaped (with Anne and her children’s help), Haytham had been taken by Birch and has been inducted to the Templar Order, leading us to the Kenway-Scott Abel and Cain setup. In this one, Jenny would be hunting down Haytham and no one is sure if she’s hunting him to try and reason with him or to kill her because he’s a ‘stain’ in the Kenway name. In this one, Jenny would end up being Ratonhnhaké:ton’s secondary mentor who doesn’t always agree with Achilles.

(2) Jenny is able to fend off her attackers and protect Haytham but fails in protecting their father. In this one, Jenny stays with the Kenways and takes over the household after Tessa has a breakdown (calling her and Haytham monsters). Birch is gone in the wind because he knows the Assassins know he’s a Templar and Jenny takes over training Haytham as well. In this one, Haytham becomes an Assassin who has a vendetta over Templars and hunting down Birch (who would now be the one to go to the colonies which will lead to Haytham and Kaniehtí:io meeting because… no matter how much is changed from what is meant to be… the Calculations will always find a way to ensure the birth of Desmond Miles will come to pass)

#sidebar i don’t think we have actual confirmation that she actually met anne bonny? #anne stayed in the mansion while edward meets with her in the docks #but i can totally see her staying in great inagua for a few days while the both resupplies #during that time she could have met anne #that would be the logical thing to do lol #assassin's creed #teecup writes/has a plot #fic idea: assassin's creed #ask and answer #edward kenway #jennifer scott #haytham kenway #anne bonny

[acourtofantumbra]

Was doing a deep dive for a future post about *gestures wildly* witches... Manon's lineage... cross-world connections... something I've found that feels actually tangible, maybe. Anyway, despite only dipping a toe into the ToD reread so far (I am not a ToD hater lol I'm just busy) I found myself checking a moment from KoA and took a nosedive into something immediately shinier. But it was so sudden I didn't have time to do my usual highlights/scribbles on my (currently dead) ipad so... enjoy my measly Kindle highlights.

I KNOW many folks have beautifully analyzed SJM's repeated character names because at one point SJM herself basically said, "I keep a record of all of them and I know what I've used."

I've seen folks flag important repeats for years now (we've seen this film before, A+ work, it keeps me up at night!), but the heavy hitters have been Briar, Thanatos, Cormac and even Ruhn (you know... the Erilean mountains and the hottie who knows 3 things).

So it stands to reason that repeated names might deserve some extra scrutiny... And I pray we get some pay off with that in CC3.

Anyway, as I'm pulling at the thread of ToG witches via our (my) favorite queen - Manon - I hadn't realized I fully forgot her dad's name. Frankly, of all the plot points from ToG, Manon's story's specifics were the haziest... except where Dorian is concerned I'm a mere mortal... and that has me suspicious regardless. Anywayyyy, as you can see above, it's Tristan. Tristan Crochan.

I cannot fully explain the cartwheel flip my brain did thumbing through the roladex of SJM's characters... because Tristan Flynn was not the energy my brain was ready for after reading this really sad passage about Manon's murdered family.

On my first read of the SJMU I went ACOTAR (long break between the original and ACOSF) -> CC -> TOG. And on my first TOG read, this passage triggered no alarm bells. I probably just didn't remember Flynn all that much. But after my CC reread... oh. I remember him. Don't you worry.

Now I am fan of Flynn. He's got a rakishness I simp for, I root for him and the dragon, and clocked his lordship woes despite having what we've all decided is a "hot dad". He's a good time. And Flynn feels like someone to watch! He makes an appearance in not one, but two, CC bonus chapters... and he's got a crush on the aforementioned dragon, who either was introduced for no reason or is gonna be a key player going forward. Or SJM is fucking with us. I don't have the answers.

But what I'm struck by Tristan-wise is a) the similarity in the little physical descriptors we get - brown hair, brown eyes and b) not actually Flynn-related... but a deeply similar sounding story to none other than the Autumn King. Daughter you didn't know was born to a woman you claim was your real love... check. Searching far and wide with a singular focus on recovering your daughter... check. Having another kid out of obligation and duty to continue on important bloodlines... check!!!

It might not have anything to do with Flynn at this current moment... but it's not implausible. Lord Flynn is of course a beloved frat-pack member living in a dump with his fellow bros. He specifically pops up in these bonus chapters going through the motions necessitated by his aristocratic bloodline. His mom/family is eager to marry him and his sister off - of course he seems miserable about the whole idea. But also resigned to it? It seems complicated. TLDR there's a world where Flynn's like "woof, yeah I gotta get married off but the heart wants what it wants!" There is precedent!

Also, I've been 👀 Flynn since it was flagged that he has "super rare earth powers" not commonly seen in Valbaran Fae... first off, what does that mean? Second, hot?!

Well I've done it again, so many words and nothing really of note to take away haha. I'll be honest, my mind was not in a Tristan Flynn headspace!! I'm kind of bogged down in my own thoughts about the witchier women of this multiverse... but in my dragon theory speculation Flynn popped up again and I really can't explain why random dead ends are turning up Tristan!!! I'm not mad about it, but I wish I understood.

#sjm multiverse #throne of glass #cc3 #sjm multiverse spoilers #sjm theory #manon blackbeak #tristan flynn #tristan crochan #crochan witches #rhiannon crochan #crescent city #house of sky and breath #kingdom of ash #autumn king #bryce quinlan

[hotchs-big-hands]

Hmm okay so we know high school Aaron was an absolute wreck. Man could not figure out how to ask out his crush without joining a literally theater production and just awkwardly dancing/singing as like Pirate #4 and desperately hoping she'd notice him. We also see him not able to ask out Beth for MONTHS when girl was like basically running into his arms every few days. Later she literally tells him, in public and (quietly) in front of his son that he'll 'score' if he comes over to her place that evening. I have drawn the following conclusions:

1. Hotch is oblivious as fuck. You could be standing in front of him, titties out with a sign in your arms saying "FUCK ME AARON" and this man would turn his head and look around like, I didn't realize there was another guy named Aaron here

2. Hotch never learned how to flirt with someone who he doesn't know on a very personal basis. He learns how to flirt with a specific person after a lot of time dating/married to them, but man has absolutely no idea how to flirt with a woman he likes

3. Hotch likely needs constant explicit reassurance that you like him. Like even 2+ years into a relationship with you, he needs you explicitly tell him that you want him and what you want him to do. Even after he learns your tells, he still needs to hear the words come out of your mouth

4. Hotch is a flustered mess. He's very used to having to hide his nervousness behind a confident exterior and overanalysis, so you might not realize it at first. But if he likes you, he has absolutely no idea how to interact with you. He's either gonna act like a clumsy stuttering school boy who can't form words, or he's gonna be in "cold emotionless bossman" mode. In opinion, he rotates between the two extremes‐-you work with him for three days straight on a case, and the only thing he says to you is "Good work Agent," before promptly leaving the room. You're convinced he hates you until he tries to bring a mug of coffee the next morning and drops it on the floor

5. Hotch is only good at dirty talk and domination because this man needs to hear you speaking to him. You could literally be writhing on the sheets in ecstacy and he's asking you how it feels cause he's like, but what if she doesn't like it though?? He literally looked up dirty talk phrases at one point and made a little script in his head so he could subtly check in

6. Hotch is deeply insecure. He is insecure about himself on a level that is likely never going to be fully fixed. It's why (at least partly) he's such a gentleman and a Consent King, why he's so dominant and emotionally closed off at work and in his personal life, why he's only ever had two SOs in his life, why he distances himself from everyone at the BAU. He'll make other excuses about these things, and who knows if it's from his bad childhood or military school or what. But part of the reason why he cares so much about whether you're insecure or why he is on a fundamental level such a kind person is because he gets self-deprecation on a level that he doesn't share with anyone, not even the people closest to him if he can help it

HHHH I AGREE He genuinely does not fucking get it if or when someone is flirting with him. Or even why. Why flirt with him of all people?? It takes a lot for him to slowly accept that yes, you are actually into him and want to date him.

And poor sweet Aaron needs reassurance a lot :( he doesn't know what he's done to have you in his life so you gotta lay his head on your chest, play with his hair and tell him all the reasons you love him and need him in your life 🥺🥺🥺

#🦴 anon #💌 ah asks #aaron hotchner x reader

[moonstruckme]

Dude, I need a relationship advice from you. and please be blunt and honest with me.

So I have fiancee. To start with, I never read AO3 or tumblr near him, cos I don't want him to see me as this crazy maniac girl who loves weird and questioning fanfics that doesn't makes sense and out of line from normality. And plus our environment kinda religious and you have to agree half of the fics in here and AO3 are mostly sinful. Including poly relationship, since it looks like cheating.

Next, since we already engaged and we even planning to marry next year, I just wanna be true to him. I want him to see me entirely, that this is the woman you'll spend your lifetime with, the woman that'll bring your child to the world, etc, etc.

So, I started to read Tumblr even when he's around. Even on his lap, while he watched his mechanical series idk what about. But because I read it on iPad, obviously he also can read it too. And I love your poly marauders a lot. And it's not even that smut, not at all! And I've read something worse than your fluff poly relationship fics.

Well, since he see me read all your poly fics, he asked me about it and then we joked about it. He asked me if I would like to be in a poly relationship. And I jokingly say yes if only marauders, the one you write are real. No other marauders, only your marauders cos I know your marauders are so fucking perfect it's obvious that they won't exist in this cruel world

Suddenly he said, should we try it? Cos next year we won't be able to be crazy again. Next year we'll be tied to one another by god and government. so it'll be our last chance to be crazy. And at this point I really confused cos why the hell he brings this out? I thought we're only joking around. Why he makes it sounds real?

While I want to asked him what is he talking about, he pulled his phone, open Instagram, and show me account of the girls he would like to be in poly relationship with.

And now I'm wondering, if he's joking or not. But he already has a list of girls he wants to be in poly relationship with. And he never heard the word poly before this. Make me questioning if he actually been playing behind me? And see this as a chance to... Idk?

Should I continue this marriage plan. He kinda scared me now. Like, how could you have list of women you want to be with. And it's not fictional women, they are real, and I know this women. They mostly our friends, my friends.

If the list are black widow, or sydney sweeney. I'll be accept it and laugh and thought it just a joke. But it's not, and now I'm not sure about our relationship.

What should I do?

Btw sorry for the long story, I'm not ready to tell this to my family, and idk if I can trust my friends since they all in his list. I don't want to make them feel awkward around me or feel bad

Hi! So, this is obviously deeply personal, and I'm going to try to give my advice because you've asked for it, but I just want to say first that you should do whatever feels right for you and your relationship. I've never been in a relationship and don't know your fiancee, so I can only give you my perspective within those limitations.

It seems like this started because you want to go into your married life having complete honesty with your partner (I would want the same), so my first instinct is to have a frank conversation with him about your concerns and see what he says/how he reacts.

If you're worried he's been cheating on you, though, I can see how he might just lie in that situation. In my own opinion (again, this is just me, do what feels right for you), I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone I don't fully trust. In general, I'd probably try and step back to analyze my relationship and ask myself whether I really want to marry someone I'm already having doubts about. That's me being as blunt as I can.

I really hope it all works out for you honey, and I'm proud of you for wanting to be honest in your relationship <3

#mae's asks

[pacific-rimbaud]

Thank you SO MUCH for your panville works. I find it therapeutic to read the caring and deeply loving dynamic you embed in them. Also love how you deal with Pansy's background and trauma. While she is by no means unprivileged, I think her wounds resonate deeply with anyone for whom parental love was unstable in childhood. Your writing inspires me so much. I hope you know the positive impact you have on fellow internet strangers. Fr I've reread a dress with pockets more times I care to admit and RoT is on its 3rd re read because it helps me deal with shitty days.

I have two questions regarding your own visualization of the characters in RoT that may fall out of the scope of the actual story (I imagine you might not delve into these too much even if you do have an idea of them in your head)

1. Do you imagine Pansy's mother's own trauma too, when you write? Like what are the wounds that made her such a cold/unloving parent to Pansy?

Ive been thinking of it as being classic objectification of pureblood women for future marriage. Like Pansy's mother never wanted to have a child but was forced to because she's a woman and that's her duty. Would you agree with this or is she a much more sinister character?

2. In what concrete ways would you say Pansy's strengths complemented Neville's weaknesses when they began dating? We see their relationship in a super specific context where they are in their late 20s but Pansy's growth got somewhat reverted to her teenage/younger years (so it makes complete sense we see her mostly being taken care of by Neville!!). But I ask because Harry's witty response to Pansy regarding Neville "deserving what he wants" made me feel a bit sad.

Like I get that Neville's a lot more emotionally sound than she is, but I guess it made me think about whether Pansy's life is "earned" beyond her trying to be better just for Neville's sake.

I imagine her fierce protectiveness of those she loves and her ability to set boundaries without taking people's shit must have been very attractive to a younger Neville?

Sorry if this question is too obvious. I think it hits close. I relate with Pansy's trauma and waking up one day as Neville's wife would indeed feel like heaven (thank you again Harry!). But I could not imagine being able to correspond to a love like that in ways that society traditionally categorizes as love.

Much love. Thank you again for sharing your beautiful brain with us xx

Thank you so much for reading! Truly so appreciative that anyone takes the time to follow a novel-length rare pair fic.

Answers under the cut!

Pansy's mother did not want kids. Full stop. Her father was indifferent to the idea, but definitely didn't want to marry Pansy's mother. My headcanon is that Pansy's mother had an ill-advised fling with Pansy's entitled rake of a father as a young woman, became pregnant, and was compelled to enter into a miserable, lonely marriage and raise a child she had absolutely no affection for. Pansy's father was interested when he chose to be, which wasn't often. Nonexistent or unreliable attachment all around. And so it's clear, this characterization isn't an excuse or attempted explanation for Pansy's cruelty as a child. I've known many casually cruel children over the years. It's not at all unusual. Heartbreaking and yet garden variety example: a few socioeconomically privileged kids in my son's class recently approached another group of children, some of whom have serious challenges at home, and told them that their mothers didn't love them as much as their mothers. Kids can be mind-bogglingly vicious people, even with the "right" parenting. They're kids! Their brains aren't fully cooked yet. Moving the empathy needle and fostering healthy culture in a school requires skillful adult intervention, which obviously was not happening at Hogwarts. Pansy's upbringing in this story is an explanation for why she struggles to be vulnerable, why she's so deeply haunted by a history of feeling unlovable, and why the prospect of motherhood in general and an unplanned pregnancy in particular carries a special horror for her. Basically what makes your second question a little tricky to answer....

...because she's such an unreliable witness to her own life in this. I love fanon Pansy more than anything. She's abrasive, sometimes filterless, terrifyingly perceptive, doesn't suffer fools. Which I just love so much. She's someone who cannot be other than herself, and that self is often pretty spiky. But if someone can get inside, she's also unrestrained in her tenderness. Once Pansy is on your side, you're ride or die. She'd do anything for you. Definitely would help you bury a body. And what I deeply love about Panville is that Neville gets to go further: he gets the innermost parts of her, which truly are so, so sweet and open and loving. She's an incredible partner. Neville has it made and knows it. And to try to answer your question, I don't tend to think about what they bring to the table, or whether anyone "deserves" anything, which is the error Pansy keeps making. I see them very much in the vein of, "I was in the middle before I knew I that I had begun." They're the catching feelings pair, whether it's friends to lovers or casual hook up to something more, because absolutely no way does she ever go into anything at all intending to be vulnerable. But he has the intuition of someone used to paying attention from the sidelines. He's curious. There's something there. He doesn't know what it is, but he'd like to. With enough patience, she unfurls. It's about the power of attentiveness and the inexplicable magic of deep connection. The payoff for Neville risking getting close enough to Pansy to peek inside is a spiky little wife who can't get enough of him in bed, has a full life of her own with passions and interests and relationships and is also deeply invested in their domestic happiness. She is profoundly, unswervingly in his corner. She sees and knows him. The payoff for Pansy risking her heart is this beautiful, kind, loyal man who adores her and whose sensibilities and preferences perfectly align with her own practical nature. He also happens to make great scones. Neither of them grew up understanding what they have was even possible, and I hope it's clear in the story that they both deserve every minute of it. 💜

#you asked I answered #remember one thing #panville #pansy parkinson #neville longbottom #long post

[batrachised]

AU where Teddy moves away, goes to therapy, and realizes his mother wasn’t just clingy, she’s abusive. Sabotaging someone to keep them isnt love. You can be hurting and still held accountable for your actions. Their reactions to your boundaries are not your responsibility.

Teddy gets a job as a police sketch artist.

He comes back to the island to visit and starts getting Very Alarmed about Dean. He replays their childhood in his head with a new, adult perspective and sees it all click into place.

He talks to his therapist and his law enforcement contacts and realizes he can’t have actually have Dean arrested and that Emily might be too groomed to see what’s going on. After all it took him years himself and he’s removed from the situation and isn’t the target.

He talks to Aunt Elizabeth and Ilse and Perry and they make a plan. (Idk what specifically tbh)

Ultimately it will be up to Emily to leave but they’re gonna do what they can to give her the space and safety to start thinking more clearly about it.

Teddy carefully starts telling Emily what he learned about abuse and boundaries and keeps it all about him and his mother but hopes she’ll think about Dean.

He carefully asks questions and listens without giving her any specific advice unless she asks.

“Why do you feel you owe him? Do you feel that way about other people in your life?”

“It sounds like you feel responsible for his disappointment?”

I keep trying to find a way Teddy (or better yet - Emily) can have Dean arrested but I can’t come up with it.

Man Teddy could have been such a good character and he was just fully wasted. Emileddy even has interesting opposite-but-similar trauma in so many ways.

Lucy Maud didn’t even try with them. 😩

YOU UNDERSTAND MY PAIN ABOUT TEDDY KENT! Normally I try to avoid dunking on teddy because if you like him, great! don't let me spoil your fun! However, emily and teddy are my least favorite lmm pairing

Re: teddy's mom, I think that's something we see appear more than once in LM Montgomery's work--someone who is emotionally abusive or worse but legitimized through being presented as a tragic figure. Unfortunately no examples come to mind, but iirc her short stories can have that theme. An extreme example is the short story of the man who falls in love with a woman, she chooses to marry someone else and has a daughter, he helps raise the daughter, and then MARRIES THE DAUGHTER IN WHAT'S PRESENTED AS A FIX IT SCENARIO.

With Teddy, I honestly think the problem is that he doesn't balance out Emily well. Other LMM pairings go very well together in a satisfying contrast--Teddy doesn't. I still (yes, still) need to embark on my reread of the trilogy (Emily of New Moon is sitting on my dresser as I type), but although my memory could be deeply flawed and downright horrifically wrong (yes i'm still scarred about dean priest), I remember him being too similar to Emily, and more than that--being dull as dishwasher compared to all the other male characters, especially Perry!

Your ideas are very appealing because they make him protective of Emily haha, he needed something...more to his character. If I were writing Emily, although I do not pretend to have anywhere close to LMM's talent, I would probably just give her a love interest with an entirely different personality. What would that look like? I don't know! I do think that Teddy Kent was not a good foil to Emily Byrd Starr, and the book suffered for it (at least for me!)

#the best choice probably would have been to have Emily end up alone but I understand why LMM didn't do it #I for one would have been upset as a child haha #when I think of emily I think of someone who is sensitive and proud #perry was a good foil to her even tho I think they'd be a boring pairing because ilse exists #teddy was not

[jalebi-weds-bluetooth]

Hey jalebi! Your thoughts on Swami track is absolutely fuckin true I never had closure with it or even how Khushi was insulted before however I went on forgiving as plot carried on. But I always felt The toxic masculinity Arnav carried is NOT something a naive girl like khushi can understand because it is soo deeply rooted, Khushi has barely seen the real world where Arnav was grown and experienced like fine wine which I think is a tad unfair. The writers might have thrown it under rug but honestly I wish they could have handled it better As after heer-ranjha there was more potential to build a strong story line leading to truth indirectly but however they followed loop. The show is still much talked or more as it's world wide telecasted in diff countries . However I wish the writers have thought through. And Anyhow I always loved your writings you subtly and strongly make straight point , Also heard you have interviewed Barun sobti😅 congratulations on your fan moment and you have handled it pretty well but one answer intrigued me was when he said he was just like Arnav when he was playing the role made me bit sad for his wife because she looks quite lovely and chilled.

Hey Anon!

Ugh, I love we bond over our thoughts on Swami tracks cause what the-!

Heer Ranjha was SO powerful and that following with Sundari Shaitaan was BRILLIANT but what did all of that lead to? *visible shudders*

Haha I'm glad you love this crazy corner of the next.

I am so glad you loved the interview, my heart gets so happy every time I hear it! Haha I think what he meant he understood that guy a LOT and he was like him in terms of being honest.

His other character was someone who was forced by his fam to marry one woman and he kept seeing his girlfriend on the side.

Whereas Arnav is direct, honest to his family about his viewpoints, cares shit about unsolicited advice and once is aware that he loves Khushi - he's fully committed to her regardless.

And that is, what I think, Barun is talking about. Cause the character he actually is the most like is Arjun from Tu Hai Mera Sunday.

So, at that time (2011) between the man child who couldn't decide between the women in his life (in Baat Humari Pakki Hai) and a steadfast character who eventually falls deeply in fall and is just a confident man in general (IPKKND) - he related to Arnav far more.

Ugh he and his wife are so adorbs, it's CUTE CUTE CUTE.

Love,

JWB

#ask #anon #barun sobti #YAY I INTERVIEWED HIM

[thisbuildinghasfeelings]

After rewatching the episode this morning and thinking about it a lot overnight (A LOT--I got less than 4 hours of sleep 😬), here are my thoughts:

I feel like I'm now fully on board in that I love Tarlos, this doesn't change how I feel about them, I'm excited to see what happens next, and there are even aspects of it that I find interesting. Essentially, I've accepted that this is happening and I'm going to enjoy it as much as possible. Is this the route I would have chosen for them? NO. Am I happy they did this? Not really. Could I end up being even a little happy they went this way? Possibly, we'll see how things go--I'm reserving judgment. Can I live with it? Yes.

I'm so happy that they didn't have TK and Carlos break up over it or something. TK is handling it so incredibly well, he had a perfect right to be way more upset than he was, and his love and support for Carlos is beautiful to see.

I don't think this is particularly out of character for Carlos. I certainly don't think marrying Iris is out of character, and even not telling TK about it makes a certain kind of sense with what we know about him. Something I do like about this is how it gives new insight into Carlos' past. It was already heartbreaking thinking about 17 year old Carlos coming out to his parents only to have them never mention it again, but this hurts so much more. Carlos talking about how he felt like he had disappointed his parents, that he was lost, that he and Iris thought they could make it work...were it not for the fact that this storyline just does not fit with the way Carlos and Michelle acted in season 1, I feel like I could like this aspect of it a lot more.

I'm very much hoping this means we'll be delving further into Carlos' relationship with his parents, which is something I previously thought the show might not get into again. Especially knowing now how deeply his parents' response to his coming out affected Carlos, I really hope we get at least a little scene of him talking to them about it.

I still have so many questions regarding Gabriel and Andrea: when they knew about the marriage, whether they were at the wedding, what they thought when Carlos came out to them and then a few years (?) later told them he was marrying a woman, what they thought about it when Carlos and Iris "split up"/stopped trying to make it work, how Carlos told them things ended with Iris, what they thought when Carlos introduced them to TK but they knew he was still married, what they thought when Carlos told him he was ENGAGED to TK and they knew he was still married...I hope we'll get answers to at least some of these, but I'm honestly not holding my breath. It might be something I just have to overlook, like all the season 1 plot holes this creates.

I do not believe for one second that this was planned from the beginning. It might have been considered as an idea before now, but it was never acted upon. Hence the major plot holes.

The PLOT HOLES. Carlos absolutely would have been a suspect in Iris' disappearance. Detective Washington would have treated Carlos completely differently in season 1 had he actually been Iris' husband. Michelle would have talked to Carlos completely differently about Iris if Carlos was really Iris' best friend/husband. Did Dustin know Iris was married? Were Carlos and Iris completely estranged/not speaking before Iris disappeared, because we know she was hanging around with shady people and suffering from mental illness at the time and there's no mention of Carlos being involved/worrying about her/trying to help her--also, Carlos couldn't have been involved in her life at that time or Michelle would have been questioning Carlos about who Iris was hanging around with then instead of having to again violate her restraining order to ask Dustin. I could go on, but I won't. Really, this is my biggest issue with the whole thing...but I can get over it. It's not like we haven't had to overlook plot holes or fill in blanks ourselves with this show before. And the parts of the show it affects are primarily the Michelle/Carlos scenes in season 1, which were never really my favorite scenes to begin with.

I am still excited about this season, and I think it's going to be really good! We have a lot to look forward to (including some exciting things mentioned in interviews): the Tarlos wedding, hurt Carlos, whatever else episode 4 brings (like TK and Gabriel working together), seeing Ronen and Rafa act the hell out of everything, a love interest for Paul, some major Marjan episodes, meeting Grace's sister, more Judd navigating his relationship with Wyatt, Strand-Reyes in law wedding planning shenanigans, a hopefully satisfying scene between Owen and TK in episode 8, and probably a lot more.

Overall, I'm ok with it. And I can't wait for next Tuesday!

#911 lone star spoilers #911 lone star

[nellie-elizabeth]

His Dark Materials: The Botanic Garden (3x08)

Woof! Okay. Let's talk about it.

Cons:

The thing is, yeah, this episode has the problem it was always going to have, in that it feels disconnected from the rest of the story in a lot of big, obvious ways. We went through so much with Asriel and Coulter, and they barely get mentioned here. Characters like Iorek get barely a sendoff. The aftermath of Asriel's war isn't fully addressed; obviously it's implied that the Magisterium is going to go home with its tale between its legs and none of the angels on Metatron's side are going to bother anyone anymore, but we don't really see much of any of it. The Gallivespians, the other witches besides Serafina, they don't get their due here. This is how the book ends, too, I'm not saying they had a lot of choice in it, but I think the structural problems that have plagued this season are apparent when you have a finale that is kind of doing its own thing, almost entirely cut off from the plotty buildup leading to it.

Father Gomez coming to do his murdering, and Balthamos showing up to thwart him is also something from the books, but again it felt shoe-horned in. I get that I'm kind of contradicting myself, as this is an element that does tie back to earlier in the season, but it feels so disjointed, like, God is literally actually Dead, dude. Move the hell on.

Pros:

The thing is, though, this episode just had to get one thing right and I would forgive it all its other weaknesses. And... it got that thing right.

I want to start with Mary, who acts as the "serpent" in this little tale of temptation. She talks to Lyra and Will about what it is to feel in love, to give in to the fullness of what she can feel as a person, and that's what inspires them to realize the true depth of their feelings for one another. It's such a simple thing, and that's what makes it powerful. I appreciate the little change here that Mary was feeling attraction and love towards a woman, as I don't think it's that way in the books. Not a huge deal, just a nice little detail. And I also like that the story isn't about how Mary then fell madly in love and got married and had babies or whatever, it's just a quiet thing, a moment where she eats marzipan and remembers what it is to have butterflies in her stomach. The outcome of her romance isn't the point, here. That's lovely.

Lyra and Will... man. Okay.

I really need to give a lot of praise to these performers. Dafne Keen and Will Parry have a sometimes thankless job in portraying these characters who have to be young and innocent but also old enough to fall deeply, passionately in love. They have to play trauma and heartache and affection and childlike wonder, and the script, while decent, is also cheesy and overwrought, meaning that if these two didn't pull off the performance convincingly, it might have been truly insufferable to behold.

But it's not, because it's lovely, it's sweet, it's tender, shivery kisses and tight, desperate hugs as they sob into each other's shoulders, it's the joy of reuniting with their daemons, and the tender way they touch each other's daemons along with their own. The way they say each other's names, the way they kiss one last time through the final portal. The way Lyra talks about how one day when they die, they'll find each other again, and be so thoroughly joined that they will be together even as their atoms are used as building blocks for future life. It's High Romance, y'all, and these two actors pulled off an amazing feat, making it feel like young, inexperienced love and also like the deepest, most sacred thing in all the universe.

I don't really have a lot to say on the specifics here. I actually held back my tears during the whole bench montage at the end, but the minute the screen went black and the text appeared saying that they kept going for the rest of their lives but each lived full lives in their own worlds, I started crying. At its core, this is just a beautiful story. And sure, this television show was an imperfect telling of it, but I still deeply loved getting to see it play out in front of me.

And yeah, I guess... that's it! I feel kind of numb, that it's over. I'm grateful we got these actors to take on these precious characters, I'm excited to see what they end up doing next in their careers. This finale gets...

9/10

And now to grade the show as a whole. I think the overall thing I want to say about this television adaptation of one of my favorite book series is that it got a lot of moments really right. It had a lot of brilliant aspects. It had the most incredible Marisa Coulter I could ever have imagined getting. It had a Will Parry I fell in love with even more than the one from the books. And it had a lot of weaknesses. There were thematic elements about the church and faith and sin and love that didn't quite land. The way the daemons were integrated in particular left something to be desired. Sometimes the pacing was wonky. But usually, the things that didn't land about the show were a matter of... "I wish they'd done more or less of that" rather than "what just happened was stupid", you know? And that's better. I'm so glad I have this show to come back to and watch again someday. It's a different, and imperfect, way to revisit one of my favorite stories. As a whole, I think the show deserves pretty high marks.

7.5/10

#review #his dark materials #his dark materials review

[intentionallyjoyful]

February 23, 2023

Hi. I haven't "blogged" in years, not quite sure what's compelling me to now. I don't know who will even read this anyways. I've got a lot of my mind, as I've spent the last 2 days in thought whilst puking my brains out with a stomach virus and laying down in a fetal position. Yay for stomach viruses.

Little background on me: Almost 29 year old mom of 3 boys (5 and under), married for 10 years now, Christian, politically incorrect, Texas, SAHM, and homeschooling. I feel like that info alone will deter most people who find this blog.

So what's on my brain? Well, about 2 weeks ago I took Instagram & Facebook off my phone. I've checked it a couple times because groups/businesses, but not scrolling or going through stories. I initially removed the apps to focus more on prayer, particular when it comes to us finding a house. The house we finally committed an offer on recently did not work out mind you...which disappointed, God, but I'll trust something better is coming up. Regardless, it was good for other reasons too because social media definitely has a negative effect on me. I should probably remove TikTok too, tbh. Anyways, the biggest lesson I've learned thus far is that Not that many people give a fuck about you, and you also don't give a fuck about them. Yet social media gives this illusion that you all do. I also take less pictures/videos because even though I mostly did it for myself, I evidently was also doing it for others and because why? I don't know, like I need to prove I have a nice life or something, boredom, hoping someone will start a convo so not so isolated, Idk. I have a list I'm forming of people who actually reach out to me and who I think to reach out to and after a full month, these will be the only people I will actively dump my energy into, because obviously that's where it naturally fell. I keep finding myself being way too good of a friend to people who really don't care that deeply for me. It's really a shitty realization. On the flip side, I've noticed people who I hardly paid any mind to or would even call a friend insist that we're good friends, lol. Weird.

Speaking of energy, being part of a homeschooling co-op has been a total energy sucker. I'm not a group person, I knew this going into it, and yet I tried to go out of my comfort zone and continue to try to stick it out when I'm truly not enjoying it whatsoever. The kids love it though, we all get along great with similar values, it's just..... people are inconsistent and not as committed to the group. With me being the organizer, this leads to me constantly feeling frustrated by turnouts or lack of input/response, etc. I can't even fully explain it. I just keep praying for guidance on this and I know that if I was to just end things that it would end potential great long-term friendships for not only the kids, but for me. At the same time, I'm like if this isn't working out seamlessly already, why keep trying so much, especially when the effort is almost entirely on my part or people working through me, which I also dislike. Especially if I end up relocating further away from everyone since that's where our housing price-point keeps leading us.... shouldn't I be more involved in a community there?

Lastly, I wish my parents would move closer already. My grandma needs to pass, this poor old woman is miserable at 97 and barely hanging out. It's been thing after thing after thing. I hope and pray she passes soon and that my parents feel peace over it all. They are in desperate need of a break. Back when we lived closer to my parents, there were far too many issues. My brother was mentally unstable, my mother was in a terrible place physically and mentally as well, but fast-forward 5 years and things are so much better and now I just wish we could have simple family dinners or attend church together, get the cousins together for a playdate, or go on a nature walk with my mom. I always feel unsettled. Forever feeling like I don't belong where I'm at and that I'm missing something or supposed to be somewhere else. I don't know how to reconcile that.

And there's my first blog post. /end

[tslesbian4everlovingmywifeandrea]

I am lucky enough to have wonderful wife, bestfriend an soul mate I am always an forever deeply in love with more and more each day that supports me with my recent realizations an discovery of being a MTF transexual women and also a lesbian while I fully support an stand by my wife with her recent realization an discovery that she isn't actually a heterosexual woman because she doesn't feel any type of attraction twords any men what so ever but did feel an noticed she was 100% visually fisicaly emotionally an sexually attracted to women that would associate as a lipstick lesbian even though she has been together with me a man for 16 yrs an has given birth to our 4 beautiful kids but I have recently gotten the courage to open up to her an tell her I realized I'm a MTF transexual women and a lesbian an she has shared with me that she is a lesbian herself and we love each other so strongly and share a strong deep emotional connection together after 16 yrs together binding us as partner 4 life given us the love an compassion to support each other with our recent epiphanies of ourselves an have without question agreed an desided that we absolutely still love one another as much as always an that our love twords one another won't ever deminish, fade or burn out so much so we without question plan to stay married to each other the rest of our lives an completely supports each other's self discovery and will always be in each other's corner as each other's biggest supporter and stand by each other always an forever without limits soulmates, bestfriends, lovers and life long partners always with my stunning wife supporting an helping me have confidence to not be scared or afraid and believing in me my feelings an wishes and completely accepting with me wanting to completely change from being a man into a woman and wants to stay married together the rest of our lifes as a lesbian couple an I just hope that when the whole process of changing into a woman is 100% completely finished that when I become a woman I would hope and be incredibly lucky to end up being able to look ¹/4 as incredibly sexy looking wearing cloths or naked as my incredibly stunning an Absolutely Sexy Wife has always looked an still looks every single day and every time I look an see her wearing any clothes or naked and Yes without question or resistance in anyway about her self discovery an acknowledgement about herself I support an will always 100% absolutely support my wife actually figuring out she is a lesbian feeling no sexual attracted to any man an isn't turned on by any men or seeing a man naked and realizing she don't feel like the look of any dick an balls on any man is attractive enjoyable or appealing to see ever and don't even feel the slightest bit sexually aroused from seeing or feeling any mans penis feeling absolutely turn off by them

[frazzledsoul]

If miguel were a woman nobody would overlook how he neglected his family, no matter how much of a redemption arc was forced on her. It's really frustrating how people pretend that providing is some sort of excuse or replacement for a lack of parenting. They are sanctifying miguel way too much, which by the way it's kind of a pattern in this "fandom" since they also did that with jack, even though, to be fair, with jack they had more than one episode and a bit to base that sanctification on. Another strange thing i've seen is people claiming that rebecca's "true soulmate" was miguel?? i get that her relationship with jack has been idealised at times, but so has the one with miguel? we have barely seen some minutes of it throughout the entire show so how could it not? I may be the only one who thinks this, but i've always seen Miguel and Rebecca's relationship as deeply unbalanced, everything was always about her, her family and her idealised version of her dead husband. Up until she started deteriorating she kept consciously remembering and bringing up jack, i think its a fact she spent her whole life unable to let go of him to the point of having to avoid talking about him with miguel. Not exactly healthy but that what has been shown. There is no doubt miguel loved her very much but i have my doubts about if she was ever able to reciprocate him in the same way, and i think miguel was very aware and respectful of that, but that for him it was enough.

I actually think the episode showed a lot of reasoning as to why he got involved in this kind of marriage. I'm not sure he was ever genuinely into Shelly at all, but seems drawn to her once Jack and Rebecca are already established. He wasn't devoted to his birth family or the family he created: he seems to not have made of an effort to keep in touch with his kids and when his attempts at reconciliation are rebuffed, he moves on and pretty much pretends it never happened. He finds his mother's devotion to her sister mystifying. I think until he married Rebecca he didn't really appreciate the value of devoting himself to someone else without expecting reciprocation. And that relationship would always be unequal: his stepkids will never fully accept him, Jack will always have a large presence in that family, Rebecca will never really love him in the same way. That's always been kind of out in the open, and Miguel defended it to Madison as valid, that marrying for comfort was legitimate. Because he wasn't able to give himself selflessly earlier in his life, he would be this time around, even if it were never returned to him in the same way.

And sure we can say, maybe he should wait around for his soulmate, but he was already in his sixties. How long was he supposed to wait? Their marriage was built on comfort and companionship and I think that's valid, and knowing it was never tilted towards him made him a better husband at the end.

That said, I'm not surprised people wave away some of Miguel's earlier selfishness and try to proclaim that he's a saint that never did anything wrong. It's more difficult to see this as a redemption for what he failed at earlier on life then to say oh, Miguel did everything better because Jack died too early.

[beatriceaware]

Review: Thaddeus of Warsaw (1803)

"Men who cannot ardently feel, cannot taste supreme happiness."

A bestseller in its day, Thaddeus of Warsaw is considered by some to be the first English historical novel, taking its plot from the very real Kościuszko Uprising in Poland against an invading Russia. It utilizes real events and real people, though I do have difficulty in labeling it a historical novel myself, when it takes place only about a decade before the story itself was written and published. (Kind of like someone writing a "historical novel" taking place about an event in 2014- it still seems too contemporary).

The story follows Thaddeus Sobieski, a Polish nobleman who finds himself a penniless refugee after a tragic defeat. The book opens with military-heavy scenes that, according to Devoney Looser in her biography on Jane Porter and her sister Maria (Sister Novelists), "a general had said, "No one could have described so well the horrors in Poland who had not been an eye-witness." Many couldn't believe a woman had written it."

Once Thaddeus reaches England, however, the plot becomes a little more familiar to the tropes of the time. The plot itself is complicated to explain fully, but involves a few sudden, dramatic deaths, multiple women falling in love with this "noble foreigner," misunderstandings that lead him to think he has been abandoned by a dear friend, money woes, swooning, and several unlikely connections that continue to stretch belief by the end.

It is not without its moments of enjoyment or insight, but as a modern reader -even one used to reading drier classics- it was not always easy to get through. The most difficult aspects for me, personally, are the overwrought emotion in both the prose and dialogue, and the way the plot points start stretching credulity like taffy.

Jane Porter crafted Thaddeus to be what she saw as a sort of ideal man: deeply sensitive and emotional, honorable, religious, and heroic (in the "literally running into a burning building to save children" vein of heroism).

From a social perspective, I found it interesting how Thaddeus's financial position was not much better than what you might find a young lady of time in; in fact, he actually resorts to doing the very same thing that Laura in Self-Control does: sell his paintings. He later becomes a language tutor for two wealthy young ladies, a job sent his way thanks to an older woman who has taken a motherly interest in him, Lady Tinemouth.

Speaking of Lady Tinemouth, she has one of the most dramatic backstories of anyone in the novel, as she is revealed to be the abandoned wife of a cruel man who basically left her for his mistress and then legally took their children from her, where he (and his mistress! the GALL) have raised them to hate her. Spoiler alert: we do find out later that her daughter never believed the lies against her mother, and the two are reunited on her mother's deathbed. The daughter, Lady Albina, ends up marring Thaddeus's best friend, Pembroke Somerset, who in the end turns out to be his younger half-brother. Thaddeus himself ends up marrying Pembroke's cousin, the lovely Mary Beaufort.

I'm starting to learn that that is the sort of drama you get when reading Georgian novels!

Over all, this is a pretty hefty tome of a book (it was originally published in four volumes rather than the usual three), but if you are brave enough, you can find a free copy on Project Gutenberg.

Wild fact is that apparently (according to Wikipedia) the towns of Warsaw, North Carolina and Pembroke, Kentucky get their name from this novel!

#book reviews #classic novels #british literature #Jane Porter #Thaddeus of Warsaw #regency era #19th century fiction

[bisluthq]

I was curious about what you thought was the difference between like Jake VS Harry in terms of sex, mainly because that (from an outside perspective) seems to be a driving force as to why both those relationships lasted so long.

The vibe I've always gotten is that she and Jake "mAdE lOvE" and that probably freaked him out a bit. The implied stuff in the All Too Well short film is quite soft, and the way she portrays him in it gives me BIG commitment/intimacy phobe vibes.

And then obviously once they were hooking up after the fact she felt quite shameful about it, and the chemistry wasn't as strong as it had been because they both felt kind of shitty about it (if the 10 min version is anything to go off - also I know you at least used to be a Jake IKYWT truther and the implied sex in that seems to have a very shameful aftermath). But like the initial stuff was very like lovey-dovey.

Harry is the one I kind of blank on. It seems like they were still actively fucking after they broke up without much of the shame, or at least not in the same way. Wildest Dreams and "Slut!" (Which while not fully about Harry show her perspective on sex at that point) seemingly see her trying to justify a relationship being primarily sexual, because this person will remember her (though she's nervous that they actually won't and it will have been meaningless, because although the woman's prolific, she's a lover girl at heart).

I feel like the songs from this era is also one of the first times she acknowledges her... Skills. We get remnants of it in 2010 Sparks fly, and the promise of something great in I Can See You, but that's nothing in comparison to "you dream of my mouth before it called you a lying traitor/you search in every model's bed for something greater" so I think if nothing else they were having a good time. I think the contrast between her begging to be remembered on 1989 and even Speak Now and her constantly being haunted by/thinking she's haunting him with memories of their relationship on Red is interesting.

So is Complicated Freak which is imo very much a Haylor song. Like he sings about a relationship primarily based on sex... Where they've both been out and about... That he can't stop thinking about... And he wrote it in the 2010s. Not damning but it fits. Also it includes the line "you lost your head, so I'll give you mine," which I both really enjoy and think is dirty in a very Taylor-esque way.

I think she fell very hard and very fast for Jake and it was super romantic and she thought he was The One and he was the best sex she’d had up till that point because John’s a total freak and her and Joe J didn’t have full on sex and Jake’s more of a feminist and shit than like Martin and obvi was more experienced than any HS experiences she’d had so it was very 😍😍😍 for her. And I think he also liked her a huge amount. But ultimately like the age gap was an issue for him - according to 10 minute ATW and also like because he’s a dick but he’s not an idiot and 40/30 is no big deal but 20/30 is tbh and by her own account she was immature and I don’t think he knew exactly what he wanted but I don’t think he liked being a “daddy” so like idk he was just confused lol and so was she and they kept going back to it because she really loved him and he kept going back to it because he cared for her really deeply and found her hot but didn’t really want to be together (hence the commitmentphobic vibes we get from her portrayals of him). Idk I think dudes that age who date much younger generally don’t want to get married but also that doesn’t mean they’re soulless monsters. I think that’s what we see in her portrayal of Jake. He cared but he wasn’t willing to marry her or anything and she was 20 and in Real Love for the first time and thought he would want that kind of thing especially as he was lovebombing her.

Harry was a good time but I also think seemed like it’d work on paper and when it didn’t she got sad but like he was a good time so she kept seeing him for a while longer because it was easier than trying to find a new teenager to fuck.