#Leaving a cult

[emluvsevermore]

to anyone having a hard time after leaving a religion or cult that their family is still a part of:

it gets easier.

at first, every little thing you do that goes against them will feel wrong and you’ll be scared of how they’ll react. but eventually, defying the old rules feels more natural than it was following them.

example- my grandma texted me today because she learned about my septum piercing. she tried the emotional manipulation. “deadname, this isn’t you. you’re such a sweet angel. this is really disappointing. you were so beautiful”. but i told her that its my body and i don’t care how people view me. and it felt so freeing and so empowering, compared to two years ago when i felt ashamed even looking at piercings.

#religious trauma #ex mormon #exmo #leaving a cult #ex cult #organized religion is bad #healthy rebellion

[unwelcome-ozian]

#cult recovery #leaving a cult #safe relationships #acceptance #supporting a survivor #safe people #patience and consistancy

[clojulee]

For all of my beautiful cult survivors/apostates, its so hard leaving. I want to share my personal playlist of songs that have helped me a tremendous amount during this painful process.

Reply with any songs that have helped or comforted you!

#apostate #cult survivor #ex jw #ex mormon #leaving a cult #running away is easy its the leaving thats hard #a lots gonna change #Spotify #ex jehovah's witness

[mattdobbins]

To Those Reaching Out

To Those Reaching Out

I have been so overwhelmed with Jehovah’s Witnesses from my past reaching out. I’ve pinned this to my social media accounts. I’m really surprised that I have heard from those in my past. It’s sad and really heart wrenching for me. I want it to stop unless it’s sincere. To all my Jehovah’s Witness family and friends who have been trying to contact me recently: It’s been overwhelming to hear from…

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#Belief System #Critical thinking #Cult #Deconstruction #Emotional Healing #Emotional Impact #Emotional support #ExJehovahsWitness #exjw #Family dynamics #High-control group #Identity negotiation #Inner Narrative #Jehovah&039;s Witnesses #JehovahsWitnesses #Kindness #Leaving a cult #life #mental health #Personal freedom #Personal Growth #Professional help #Psychological support #Religious Beliefs #Religious Deconstruction #Religious Trauma #Religious upbringing #Self-Discovery #Self-reconstruction #Therapeutic Writing

[thain1982]

My experience with therapy has been a wonderful one. I hit the jackpot with my therapist and really appreciate her, but it has taken a long time for it to click that, no, actually, most well-adjusted people actually DON'T have any idea what far right evangelical Christian nationalism looks like or believes because, dangerous or not, these people are a minority who use the shroud of mainstream Christianity to cover their extremist ideologies.

I think that helped me realize I could actually trust my Christian friends more than anything else in my 4 decades of life.

#religion #queer #leaving a cult #losing my religion

[howwelldoyouknowyourmoon]

How to get someone out of a cult – and what happens afterwards

Published: November 29, 2023 11:28am EST

Suzanne Newcombe

Senior Lecturer in Religious Studies, The Open University

No one ever sets out to join a cult.

At the beginning it looks like the group will meet some need or ideal. For most people it seems to work initially - at least somewhat.

A recent Netflix documentary showed the experiences of people in the Twin Flames Universe group, which offers online courses in finding your soulmate. For those who joined Twin Flames, it seemed that they were no longer alone. Former members say every aspect of their lives were controlled. A statement on the group’s website says these claims “distort” their “true aims and methods” and “misrepresent the autonomy of our community members.”

In general terms though, why do people leave high-demand religious groups (often called cults), and how can you help someone who’s stuck? The answer is always unique and depends on the context. Important factors to consider include the individual’s personal characteristics, the nature of the group and outside circumstances.

For some people, there is a gradual slipping away. The classic cult-like group encourages isolation from friends, family and even outside employment. But if someone does continue to engage with other activities and groups, these might reduce the appeal of an increasingly demanding group.

Some people experience a sudden change in thinking when the group crosses an ethical line or when the duplicity of a leader’s teaching and behaviour is realised. Sometimes a group of people leave together.

But, as the length and depth of involvement increases, leaving can become harder and harder. This is partially due to the “sunk costs” effect. If you spend your life savings on “training” and cut all your ties with your family, it becomes more difficult to start over.

Additionally, many people are both perpetrators and victims of the group’s harmful activities. Shame and social stigma does not make it any easier to leave.

So if you’re worried someone you know has joined a cult, what can you do to help?

Intervention from an outsider can help protect someone from being further indoctrinated, but it is important to be careful about the wording you use in conversations.

follow LINK for full article

#leaving a cult #abuse #cults

[lynxxpaw]

Today's the day he can get his revenge. Boop your local vessel.

#can they implement it forever. also shoutout to everyone who booped me this one's for YOU i whipped it up in 30 minutes #ngl thats how it felt to leave for 10 minutes and then come back to 50 boops #cotl #cult of the lamb #cotl lamb #cotl narinder #cult of the lamb fanart #narilamb #cotl narilamb

[bamsara]

more trod au stuff specifcially: dreams

IDK if i want dream!narinder to be canon in the AU yet but it's certainly a concept to play around with because I think it's funny if Lamb's dreams are just kinda bittersweet while Narinder's is just that one audio going NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTM

#trod au #the rehabilitation of death #narilamb #true devotion #cult of the lamb #cotl narinder #cotl lamb #cotl the one who waits #tw blood #just in case cause nari's chest #doodles #i wanna talk about the dream stuff and au stuff but i dont want to spoil what i already have solidified #but there is A FEW OF YOU #who are leaving comments on ao3 that predicting WAY too close to what i have planned #you know who you are KHGLKSHDGSDS

[payasita]

Tracked quest: Kill Shamura in Silk Cradle

i just didnt want to do the fucking enemy wave again

#cotl #cult of the lamb #narilamb #I MEAN I GUESS #doodles #thought that wouldnt leave me the fuck alone during a 'kill the bishops in reverse order' run #its shockingly not as hard as i thought to get 12 followers before killing a bishop #because im dumb it's also a permadeath run so. thoughts and prayers guys

[aubeezz]

Somethings wrong with my car

Also suggestive ///

#my art #cult of the lamb #hands you a shit post and leaves #Narinder #Lamb #suggestive #doodles

[maydayaj]

Silly lil comic that I made with these two ❤️

#Narinder would totally fold after a while of Lamb’s begging #this is so stupid but it wouldn’t leave my brain #digital art #my art #fanart #drawing #cult of the lamb #narilamb #cotl #cotl lamb #cotl narinder #illustration #lamb x narinder #cotl fanart #narinder x lamb #cult of the lamb fanart #cotl art

[unwelcome-ozian]

I have an important question. can you have built in "mind sets" that change when you're in certain situations?

For details, I recently managed to (mostly??) get away from a cultic group I was raised in but last week the leader returned and we spent a fair bit of time together. But the oddest thing was was that it felt like my entire way of thinking changed? Everything she said felt true, even when thinking back on it it didn't make much sense. It felt like everything I thought of and did without her guidance was inherently wrong and faulty, like I was a trying to see clear through a kaleidoscope.

It took about a week for it to wear off after she left, but during that mindset it felt so much easier to speak and exist around other people. I knew what was expected of me and I knew how to fulfil that expectations, so there wasn't the anxiety and ???? that comes with social interaction (for me at least). BUT that was only when I was talking to/with her.

Now that it's worn off it all feels gross? Like I can still feel the presence of that mindset in my hear criticizing what I'm doing because I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing. I finally got my first ever job but it's online and I'm mostly left alone to do things, and I really wish I could go to school to meet people my age but I can't (pandemic made my schooling all online so no meeting people opportunities there). Without her guidance I feel aimless and without purpose, but being stuck in quarantine with her for years really messed me up.

I don't know how to interact with the outside world and knowing how easily I can fall into a mindset of "YES EVERYTHING YOU SAY IS 1000% TRUE AND CORRECT AND YES, YOU ARE THE ONLY REAL PERSON TO EXIST" and more terrifies me. I feel more real in that state, but how can I be more real if I cannot think without influence??

I don't know if you can help but can you please share any insight you have? thank you so much

It takes time to get out of and recover from a cult mindset. This is the reason going no contact when leaving high control groups is recommended.

The recontact can trigger the trauma bond to the leader and the group sometimes leading someone to return.

After exiting a cult, an individual may experience a period of intense and often conflicting emotions. She or he may feel relief to be out of the group, but also may feel grief over the loss of positive elements in the cult, such as friendships, a sense of belonging or the feeling of personal worth generated by the group’s stated ideals or mission. The emotional upheaval of the period is often characterised by “post-cult trauma syndrome”:

spontaneous crying sense of loss depression & suicidal thoughts fear that not obeying the cult’s wishes will result in God’s wrath or loss of salvation alienation from family, friends sense of isolation, loneliness due to being surrounded by people who have no basis for understanding cult life fear of evil spirits taking over one’s life outside the cult scrupulosity, excessive rigidity about rules of minor importance panic disproportionate to one’s circumstances fear of going insane confusion about right and wrong sexual conflicts unwarranted guilt The period of exiting from a cult is usually a traumatic experience and, like any great change in a person’s life, involves passing through stages of accommodation to the change:

Disbelief/denial: “This can’t be happening. It couldn’t have been that bad.” Anger/hostility: “How could they/I be so wrong?” (hate feelings) Self-pity/depression: “Why me? I can’t do this.” Fear/bargaining: “I don’t know if I can live without my group. Maybe I can still associate with it on a limited basis, if I do what they want.” Reassessment: “Maybe I was wrong about the group being so wonderful.” Accommodation/acceptance: “I can move beyond this experience and choose new directions for my life” or… Reinvolvement: “I think I will rejoin the group.”

Passing through these stages is seldom a smooth progression. It is fairly typical to bounce back and forth between different stages. Not everyone achieves the stage of accommodation / acceptance. Some return to cult life. But for those who do not, the following may be experienced for a period of several months:

flashbacks to cult life simplistic black-white thinking sense of unreality suggestibility, ie. automatic obedience responses to trigger-terms of the cult’s loaded language or to innocent suggestions disassociation (spacing out) feeling “out of it” “Stockholm Syndrome”: knee-jerk impulses to defend the cult when it is criticised, even if the cult hurt the person difficulty concentrating incapacity to make decisions hostility reactions, either toward anyone who criticises the cult or toward the cult itself mental confusion low self-esteem dread of running into a current cult-member by mistake loss of a sense of how to carry out simple tasks dread of being cursed or condemned by the cult hang-overs of habitual cult behaviours like chanting difficulty managing time trouble holding down a job Most of these symptoms subside as the victim mainstreams into everyday routines of normal life. In a small number of cases, the symptoms continue.

Oz

This information is a composite list from the following sources: “Coming Out of Cults”, by Margaret Thaler Singer

#answers to questions #leaving a cult #cults #cult mindset

[pinkiepig]

Lambert allows themselfs to be annoying only when Narinder is around jsjsj

#my art #procreate #doodle #narilamb #cult of the lamb #artwork #cotl #you know wat fck it I’m leaving it up #tumblr u hellsite

[mattdobbins]

That Apostate Series : I’m Matt

Sunday began with the tail end of my Watchtower study and a quick breakfast before heading out to the quiet of the early morning. I’d always arrive at the Kingdom Hall at least thirty minutes early, a personal rule for the serene preparation ahead—ensuring the sound system was ready, the literature desk was stocked with tracts, brochures, and magazines, and the territory cards for door-to-door…

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#Autonomy #Brighter future #Coping with leaving #Critical thinking #Cult #Deconstruction #Emotional support #Financial planning #gettingbacktolife #happy #High-control group #Identity negotiation #Kindness #Leaving a cult #Legal considerations #life #mentalhealth #midlifecrisis #Personal freedom #Personal Growth #Professional help #Psychological support #Religious Deconstruction #Religious upbringing #Resilient Humans #resilient-humans.org #Self-compassion #Self-reconstruction #Shunning #Spiritual journey

[seraphimfall]

i’ve read so much tradcath bullshit the last two years. i can confidently say tradcath men fit into one of two categories:

“protestant-raised and converted to catholicism because of his crippling porn addiction and racist tendencies. reposts crusader and conquistador memes. is hated in his local parish.” tradcath

“catholic-raised band kid who ate his lunches with the religion teacher. smells like mildew. cut off all his friends that came out as gay after high school. now larps as an aquinian scholar and cries after jerking off.” tradcath

#|| the disciple || #ex catholic #ex christian #religious trauma #exvangelical #deconversion #apostate #apostasy #ex fundie #extian #deconstructing christianity #ex religious #ex cult #ex cath #religious deconstruction #deconstruction #catholic guilt #progressive politics #leaving the church #losing my religion

[get-out-of-there-mcginnis]

With the coming of the new year, and going into springtime, I will officially be at T-minus one year.

Basically what I’m doing right now is putting all but maybe 50 — 100 dollars of each biweekly paycheck into savings, in the hope that by the time I officially sever my connection with the Borg, I’ll have enough for three months’ rent or a down payment on a house, with a little to spare.

I also have Zillow downloaded on my phone to track the cost of housing so I’ll be prepared for what I’ll have to pay when the time comes, and overall, just to get familiar with real estate.

Other than that I have no specific plans; but I do know that I’ll need to move a lot of my stuff to a third, transitional location… Not quite sure how I’ll pull that off. I may end up selling most of it, but idk

My main goal is to blow up and act like I don’t know nobody to move out, go no-contact with the congregation, and maintain a stable income.

My secondary goals are: Finding a higher-paying job with less customer service responsibilities, seeking out formal diagnoses/treatment for Things, and voice acting and/or acting as a paid hobby

#exjw #leaving a cult #ex cult