#Longasfuck
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Haikyuu Bf Headcanons
Hi everyone!
Soo after a day of debating what i should post in the meantime while the sumeru bf headcanons are under process. I decided to do haikyuu bf headcanons!
Now irl i actually play volleyball as a sports hobby with a few friends, Now i discovered haikyuu a little too late i think just a few months ago?
But yea and haikyuu was what inspired me to play volleyball and love the sport. Now i hate hate hate sports because i hate moving around(Why i stan kenma)
Now its gonna have the same style as the genshin headcanon ones only different thing is that it doesn't have voice lines obviously. But it have a little scenario(Although some of the scenario scenes might be too long so i apologize for that). of course the type will still be there( •̀ ω •́ )✧
important thing is i actually updated my pinned post and added a few things including not adding ennoshita, tanaka and kyoko to the list anymore since idk how to write their characters properly....sorry about that.
Ok....enough with my rambling and lets get started with these headcanons!
REMINDER: These characters don't belong to me this is just a work of fiction. Spoilers mention of timeskip.
ENJOY✨
(Karasuno Boys pt.1)
~Daichi Sawamura~
~Protective Boyfriend~
• Now i don't know why but i see him as overprotective....i mean he gives off dad vibes right? Then that screams overprotective to me. He would be nagging you about you shouldn't dress clothes that are too reveling or wear a shirt too short and to not walk home alone. Like for real tho i can imagine some of your friends thing that his your brother sometime💀
• Despite that he acts like an ideal husband. One who carries your bag to school, drops you off at your house, cooks you a meal sometimes and just taking care of you😊
• If your their manager and you guys announce your relationship they of course accept it. However tanaka and noya threaten daichi to not hurt you-
• Your dates are kinda a bit old fashioned somehow....like you guys sitting at a bench and just chilling, having dinner at a restaurant and sometimes dachi likes to take you on a hill at night and dance with you💘
• Whenever a guy hits on you he puts his arm around you and saids that your taken by him and walk you away.
• Since your probably shorter then him he likes how you always tip-toe just to kiss him, he thinks its cute hehe...
• His the type to buy you flowers and give them to you but its usually on a occasion. He gives you either roses or lily’s(Idk why i just think he would give lilly’s to you)
• Now you guys probably know yui michiyama right? And I'm guessing you guys know that she holds feelings for daichi and its pretty obvious....
• I'm thinking that there was this one time where you both had a misunderstanding and you thought that daichi was losing interest in you and started liking michiyama. So you got jealous and daichi noticed this at first he thought it was cute but when he noticed how sad you were and that you told kyoko you had insecurities he comforted you and he reassure you💕
• In the timeskip this is where his protective side truly shows. you thought he was protective in highschool? Bro his way worse now that his a police officer.....
• He constantly calls you wherever you go and he definitely installed a tracking device on your phone...but don't worry you scolded him for that.
• Back to the highschool days. When you both have sleepovers he prepares to stay over at your place...snice he doesn't want your parents to worry for you and he knows its a bit inappropriate for a guy and girl to share a room. So he likes to stay over at your place instead and your parents respect him for that.
• If you have siblings they will instantly treat him like a big brother and call him ‘Oni-chan’ now daichi doesn't mind he actually finds it cute. and his used to it since he has younger siblings of his own.
•Daichi is the perfect husband because he has the natural energy of a dad. So you better not leave him cause you got the jackpot.
Nicknames: Baby and sweetheart
Scenario time✨
You were jealous of michiyama...and he knew it. Daichi was chasing you and grabbed your hand and slowly hugged you. He then grabbed your chin for you to look at him. He declared
“Hey baby! Please don't get sad...just know..i love you. not michiyama. i hope you can see how much you mean to me. i wish you can see through my eyes.‟
He then smiled and gently kissed you...and you felt so stupid...you could feel he poured all his love in this kiss. So you kissed back passionately.
Oh how you loved this man.....
~Koshi Sugawara~
~Sweetheart Boyfriend~
• Now i was supposed to put gentle boyfriend but i suddenly remembered that one scene where he hit asahi with his negativity BEGONE✨ and i instantly changed it to sweetheart....he is not gentle thats for sure...
• Now being his s/o you get very good treatment from him. such as him cooking you bento’s, giving you affection 24/8 and him doting on you.
• Now he has ✨motherly instincts✨ so if he sees you doing something wrong he will immediately scold you. Don't worry his not mad his just scolding you so you don't get her in the future :)
• Other then that. Same as daichi he also gits you flowers, But instead of every occasion he actually gives you flowers EVERY WEEK and their different kinds too. He gives you flowers that have meaning and that he thinks reminds you of him. How cute💕
• If your one of their managers he always praises and thanks you for handling the team even if sometimes they could be a pain in the ass. And he helps you in cleaning up there messes at the court.
• Since other boy is handsome and is basically the angle of karasuno this man definitely has a fanclub dedicated to him. Now at first he didn't mind but when they started to bully and disturb you he snapped at them and told them to respectfully fuck off.
• He doesn't really mind people ogling at you as long as they don't make you uncomfortable...and if they do...oh boy...there gonna get an all too sweet smile from suga...
• When it comes to you his very much a sweetheart and can't stand getting mad at you so sometimes when you do something crazy with either tanaka or noya he lets you off the hook and just scolds the other 2 which of course they find unfair lol.
• He helps you with homework and basically becomes your tutor. With him you won't ever have a failing grade since he teaches you with patience and always motivates you.
• When you introduced him to your parents they instantly loved him, They knew he was perfect for you, He helped your mom with the dishes, had a fun conversation with your dad and if you have siblings they also instantly like him Your whole family loves him and welcome him to your family💕
• At the timeskip where suga becomes a teacher for kids. You instantly see how he much he loves kids...and it makes you wonder...what if he became a dad? Well...only one way to find out💖
Nicknames: Sugar, honey, sweetie and sweetheart
Scenario Time✨
Its been years since you and suga graduated highschool and you both had started quite a life together. Him a teacher and you a nurse(Or whatever u want✨)
You often saw how suga would treat his young students....and it made your heart swell...you can't help but think how he would act towards your own children...well future ones...so you were planing to ask him...tonight...
You made dinner and dressed up in pretty clothes and then a few minutes later suga had come home.
“Sugar I'm home! Huh? Why are you all dressed up? And what's all this!? You wanted to talk about something with me? Ok..go ahead..e-eh.? You..wanna have a baby!? I....nono sweetheart I'm not opposed to the idea...its just that..do you think...I'm ready to be a father? Y-you think so? Well then...if you wanna baby that bad... *Lifts you up* Off to the bedroom we go then...I'll make sure we have a baby the first time~‟
Oh dear y/n...what have you gotten yourself into....?
~Asahi Azumane~
~Shy Boyfriend~
• Obviously his the shy type....but very very sweet...
• Not gonna lie when you first met him you thought he was scary but you decided not to judge a book by its cover and talk to him. and what do you know? Now you guys are a couple😊
• He at first was very shy and insecure about you guys relationship....but when months past he started to become more comfortable.
• Everything you do to him. Hug him, kiss him, hold his hand just anything. He. in no doubt will blush like a tomato, Honestly its cute so you can't help but tease him sometimes. your so mean(○｀ 3′○)
• When you guys go on dates its either at a cafe or the park! Since sometimes his a bit to socially awkward.....
• He likes how your shorter then him sometimes since it gives him a sense of pride knowing that he can hold you and protect you since he doesn't want you getting hurt, And when you hold his hand with your small hands he just melts💕
• Your often the one imitating things in the relationship since baby is just too shy to do something, and when he does want to do something as simple as hold your hand he hesitates. since he doesn't wanna make you uncomfortable.
• When you took him to meet your parents he was nervous and safe to say when they saw him they were terrified and were basically questioning your life choices and taste in man. But your dad gave him a chance to prove himself, and once asahi started becoming comfortable unexpectedly they were shocked to see that he might look scary and older but his actually a sweetheart who couldn't hurt a fly🥺 Instantly your mother started to love him and your dad approved of him. Your siblings obviously were first scared but later on they started to warm up to him and asahi would let them mess with his hair or climb on him. Overall your family approves him👍
• In the timeskip he is an apparel designer(Which i was shocked to know)I'm pretty sure that when he proposed to you he was the one who decided for the decor and setup of your wedding. Along with you guys clothes🥰
• He really wanted your wedding to be special💕
Nicknames: Sweetheart, dear and honey
Scenario Time✨
Its been a few months since your beloved fiancé Asahi had proposed to you, And you both have been rather busy the past few months. You with work and him with your wedding. This also meant that you both didn't have that much time to spend with each other....
So you took a day off along with Asahi and you both decided to go on a picnic!
“Ah! This is a good spot! Its been weeks since we spend time together like this....you agree to honey? I still can't believe we're getting married in a few months...its...its just so...unreal, I mean we were both so inlove in highschool i know that but...i didn't think we'd make it this far. I...I'm lucky to have you dear...I'll love you forever”
How can you not fell for him all over again?
~Yū Nishinoya~
~Chaotic Boyfriend~
• He definitely had the thing called ‘Love at first sight’ and instantly started simping for you. Of course you thought that he was just like this infront of any pretty girl he meets because you saw how he treated kyoko. But oh boy your so wrong.
• Even before you guys started dating he started offering to hold your bag for you, walk you home, help you with things and wanting to hang out with you. Now the other members of karasuno started to notice this behavior and knew instantly that their libero liked you....alot
• When you guys started dating expect to do some crazy stuff on your dates. Like climbing the mountains, gaming together, disobeying the law and all other crazy shit.
• Definitely asks you the ‘What's your pussy size?’ when you ask him to buy you pads💀
• If you cook for him he.will.be.blessed.for.life like he can just die there on the spot happily....your probably the only one who can make him eat his veggies
• If your one of their managers expect him to act like your guard dog most of the time like if a player got close to you he might start barking-
• He tries to be sweet i swear but he just can't help but laugh at some stupid thing you do. Like if you trip he'd start laughing at you and if he pranked you...even if his gonna be dead he'd still laugh.
• If your shorter then him he'd be soo happy and call you his little shortie even if his short himself🥰 You guys are often called the short couple💕
• When your family met him. They instantly thought the you liked younger boys which you said that you both were the same age. Now your mom likes him and your siblings too but your dad don't approve of him yet since he thinks noya isn't manly enough for you.
• In the timeskip his mostly traveling the world right? Well expect him to take you with him. Since he loves being able to experience things like this with you!
Nicknames: Honeypie, My shortie, babe, love and mine
Scenario Time✨
You and nishinoya were in the Philippines together exploring the country’s beautiful beaches. When noya left to get sunscreen that you guys left at the hotel you were just walking around the beach just thinking a few things.
By that i mean....about you 2.
No...your not thinking of breaking up....your just thinking...you both hve been together until highschool and you were thinking if he wanted to take things to the next level...by that i mean get married.
But you doubted it....he wanted to travel around the world....and you didn't want him to settle down and not have that much freedom anymore......
“Heyyy honeypie! Thats where you were! Don't go running off that much just stay where i can see you hehehe, Is something wrong? Since this morning you've been deep in though. Huh you've been thinking about what? Well.....i...don't mind....babe...I've made up my mind! Once we get back to japan...I'm...I'm marrying you and nothings gonna stop me!‟
Once noya declared that you couldn't help but tear up and hug him....maybe traveling wasn't that bad after all...cause your gonna be getting your happy ending soon....
~Keishin Ukai~
~Flirty Boyfriend~
• Now i feel like he'd be a big flirt when it comes towards you because he finds you hot and pretty. But he obviously took you more seriously when he found out that he fell for you. Now you both definitely met when you would always go to his store and buy lunch there and thats when he started noticing you.
• When you both got together he would try to stop his smorking and drinking since he knows you worry about his health. But sometimes he can't help himself-
• When the team met you...you were instantly the mom of karasuno and the boys love your sweet and caring nature💖 Now when he introduced you to his grandfather....you thought he hated you. But he instead asked you why you decided to date his weaking of a grandson💀
• Keishin is still a flirt even if you guys are together/dating he teases you alot and loves seeing your flustered face
• He definitely makes out with you at like the backroom of the store and sometimes it leads to more.....
• When his drunk expect him to get extra flirty with you...l.may the lord help your soul🙏🏻
• When your family meets him your mother instantly loves him and your dad at first didn't and thought he was a payboy but keishin proved himself and now he gets along with your family and have there blessing🥰
• When he plans to propose to you he makes the whole team help him prepare because he wants it to be special and wants you to say yes.
Nicknames: Babygirl/babyboy/baby, babe, hotstuff and sweetheart
Scenario Time✨
Now being to say....you were nervous as heck when you were at work keishin your boyfriend of 4 years had texted you saying to meet him karasuno’s court after their practice because he had something very important to say/talk to you...and you were nervous about what he was gonna say....
Before your insecurities take place you started heading over there and you saw kyoko standing outside you looked at her confused and she just smiled and lead you inside the court where you saw......
Volleyballs and balloons?
Your eyes widen and you saw keishin holding flowers while the boys were holding volleyballs that said........
‘Will you marry me?’
You had tears in your eyes and you ran to keishin hugging him...
“Soo...i guess thats a yes? Hehehehe‟
There was nothing to be nervous about after all....
~Ittetsu Takeda~
~Sweetheart Boyfriend~
• Same with suga when i see him instantly think baby and sweetheart he just gives off that vibe to be honest with you.
• You guys met because you were the medic of karasuno and also the schools nurse so you often interact with him and he eventually fell because of our caring nature.
• He was extremely shy when it came to you and it took months for him to confess to you and it had to be with the help of the team.
• When you guys finally started dating he is the sweetest boyfriend ever. He will cook for you, buys you flowers, complement you everyday and motivate you as well💖
• Since you both are always busy he cherishes the time you both have when you spend time together, your dates are mostly of you guys either being at home resting/cuddling or having a walk and eating out.
• When you introduce him to your family they instantly love him...i mean from the way you talked about him they knew he was a great match for you. He knows how to get along with kids since his a teacher and likes kids in general
• Not long after he proposed to you and you both got married it was a simple wedding but you both couldn't care less💕
Nicknames: Love and dear
Scenario Time✨
It has been a few years since you and ittetsu had gotten married and things were going well. He was still a teacher at karasuno and you were still a school nurse as well But you had decided to take a break soon because.....you were...well... pregnant...
Now ittetsu knows this and you both found out 3 months ago and the roundness of your belly was starting to show but you told him you could still handle walking around and working and your being careful.
When you see ittetsu with his students you can't help but feel excited at how he'd treat your kids i mean you know well but it just makes you excited to meet your baby soon!
“Love...what do you think our baby's gender would be? You hope its a boy? Hahaha...i feel the opposite....i hope its a girl...why? Well because shes gonna get your looks and not only that some studies show that babygirls are more closer to there dads!‟
You giggled at his claims and just hug him....oh dear baby...i hope you can hear your father right now...
FINALLY ITS DONE!!!!
I hope u guys enjoy part 1 of the karasuno boys, I had fun writing and thinking of headcanons for them since i love thses boys alot.
Do u guys think the scenario scenes are nice? I personally hope they are since i think they rather sweet🥰
Again i must apologize for any grammer or spelling mistakes so I'm sorry
I hope you guys enjoy this and I'll see u on my next post.
goodbye for now✨
#Haikyuu#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu headcanons#anime gif#haikyuu fluff#manga / anime#volleyball#sugawara x reader#daichi x reader#asahi x reader#nishinoya x reader#ukai x reader#takeda x reader#Longasfuck#too sweet might make ur teeth fall off#goodbye
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Not so quick rundown of what I have been up to
Basically why I haven’t been doing much in the posting/content department, broken down by month. For the tl;dr crowd: skip the october 2016 entry unless you want to read about some drama, the rest of it has just been my adventures with unemployment and how it has affected me for the past 8 months.
July 2016: This month I had lost my job of 8 years due to the company completely closing nationwide. First time ever filing for unemployment as I wasn’t able to find another job in 3 months since said company announced their closures on April 1st of the same year. Was really upset with the store closing as I really was starting to feel like I had a job that I was decent at, had met some great people working there both employee and customer, and now I wouldn’t really have a chance to interact with them as much. Went to San Diego comic con as I had purchased tickets well in advance. Didn’t get to do most of what was on my list of things to do there, but did get to have a personalized sketch done by Yoji Shinkawa as well as sit in on a small q&a session with Hideo Kojima.
August 2016: With unemployment filed and completed, I was looking for all sorts of work. I collected a lot of possible work via etsy with requests for new destiny cloaks as well as preparing for the halloween season for my goddaughters’ costumes as they live in another state than me. End of the month I ended up with a job offer from the lady who works at the storage unit I rent from. The lady had injured herself at the end of the month by fracturing her right arm in 2 places, making it unbearable to do any of her bookkeeping tasks, and asked if I would like to help her with. I said yes as she’s 73 years old and nobody should have to deal with working through that kind of pain.
September 2016: I started to work for the storage unit place the day after labor day. It was an easy job, just somewhat boring as it was a fairly archaic setup. All bookkeeping was done by hand, including receipts, ledgers, etc. Only the key card system for the gate was done via a computer program. This job was to be temporary while she healed. When she was well enough to work, I would be let go as its a one person operation. Also to note, most storage unit places typically have a home/condo/apartment built into the office, as there is someone always on the premises. This was the case with this place, so I was able to take care of her in the beginning as well as do the tasks at hand. This was also a full time job.
I started to get a bunch of early etsy orders for the holiday season as well as for halloween, so on top of having a full time job, I had to also work my etsy part time on top of the halloween costumes for my goddaughters. I had an old acquaintance contact me out of the blue around this time as well, where she told me that she was planning on visiting close to me to see some friends she met while playing Destiny. At the time I was happy for her and excited as I hadn’t seen her physically in about 10 years and figured this might be a great trip for her to show her around my hometown and the surrounding area and just catch up. More on her in October. Finished this month with a very last minute run to see Carpenter Brut in concert. Literally found out about the concert 2 hours before they went on so drove as quickly as I could to DNA lounge. Definitely was worth it, excellent show all around.
October 2016: This one is a long one. Skip to November if you don’t want an essay about old acquaintance. I’m needed for another month to work at the storage unit place. I have had to help her with things that I was not prepared for, mainly of the medical type. She is diabetic and has survived both lung cancer and colon cancer. I am becoming more of her in-home care person on top of taking care of the expected duties of the job, which was starting to put a strain on things as I would simply work my 8 hours a day for 6 days a week, most of that was taking care of her, going home, taking care of my grandparents, and sewing and working on etsy until I needed to sleep, rinse, repeat. I get the goddaughters costumes made and out to them, they love them, as well as another friend of mine wanted me to make matching dad and son costumes for his son’s first halloween.
Made his son a pikachu costume and Dad an Ash jacket. Also near the end of this month I got to see Magic Sword in concert. It was a bit of a bummer as the venue was ill-equipped to handle a show like theirs so we didn’t get the whole experience with the lights and background, on top of the fact that the sound guy was doing a lousy job so they didn’t come out for an encore and simply stopped playing halfway through “In the face of Evil”. Hoping that they’ll come out to SF again or somewhere closeby so I can see a full show. *skip to november 2016 to avoid massive drama backstory essay
Middle of the month is when my old friend was due to come out to visit. A little background on said friend: I met her back in 2005 when I was just starting to get into cosplay. We would chat about similar interests as well as cosplay related things, despite there being an age difference of about 6-7 years. She’s had a few hardships in 2006 that was of her own doing which led her down a path of co-dependence on others as well as manipulation and always playing the victim. Our communication was spotty, her only surfacing when she felt like it, always to unload her stories of woe and hardship.
I had tried to help her on several occasions as best as I could despite being several states away. I’d send care packages when I could afford to, mainly of food as she would talk about not having money for it, work screwing her out of hours, etc. I would also send old clothes as she lived in a much colder part of the country now and she was ill prepared for the winter in her state. I had commissioned her for a costume just to help her pay bills despite said commission being extremely late for the event it was needed for, and practically unwearable due to poor construction. I had sent her money when she was in between relationships and had no job. Simply put, I was there for her as much as I could be, but she wasn’t really reciprocating that over the years and at the time I wasn’t really able to see it.
Fast forward to the week she is coming out here. She fails to tell me that her friend that she is visiting is more of a romantic interest. She’s in a 3 year relationship with a guy she’s living with. She has also been talking with another guy who she plays Destiny with in a romantic way, so basically she’s got 2 possible love interests and a boyfriend at home that she doesn’t want to work things out with, but also doesn’t want to break up with just yet as if she does then she won’t have a place to live. Trying not to judge but also not really liking said situation as its pretty scummy of her. The weekend before her trip, said friend she’s supposed to be visiting with for a week upsets her majorly and is now not a possible romantic connection in her mind, but is not known by him as she doesn’t tell him that she’s upset with him because she’s now too invested in this trip.
She comes out here and gets to stay with him at his parents place. She has a list of things she wants to do while out here, but wants to do them in a certain order so she has money for said things. Understandable, but makes it a bit difficult as she expects both myself and her host to take her places and keep her entertained. A lot of suggestions get shot down as she doesn’t like doing said things, but has to realize that there aren’t many free things to do during the weekdays. She gets increasingly frustrated by her host and his family for doing the most mundane things despite letting her stay there for free as well as feeding her, considering she is in the heart of wine country as well as the heart of dubious airbnb country where they could have easily charged her a premium for staying with them. She feels entitled to her friends money, as many times I would get a text from her complaining about him not paying for her part of their outing. She would also get upset with him when he would ask who she would be on the phone with, as she was in contact with said other guy who she liked from Destiny. This would irritate me as I felt as if she was ungrateful and somewhat disrespectful, on top of the fact that I was juggling a full time job, my etsy as a part time job, and taking care of both my grandparents and this lady at the storage unit.
I take her out to SF so we can catch up and just have some girl time, despite really not having the time to do so, on top of it being an extremely busy weekend in SF as fleet week was happening. She didn’t really talk much with me on the trip unless it was to complain about her friend and to tell me how excited she was to talk with the new guy she liked. I would try to talk about what’s been going on with my life, only to be met with segues into something else completely different or just changing the subject. Not a lot of catching up, she spent a good chunk of her money on items for herself as to be expected, with snide remarks on how nobody really gets her gifts. This kinda pissed me off as I had spent at least 2 weeks on a knitted scarf for her as well as a small messenger bag that I sewed for her for this trip. I take her back to her friends parents place and go home.
A few days after our outing, my grandpa had a stroke episode while I was home on my lunch break that scared both myself and my grandma. Had to rush him to the ER, had to contact work and let her know what’s going on and why I’m not back, work was supportive and just closed up early for the day for me as I wasn’t sure how long we would be in the ER. I’m getting texts from my friend of her complaining that this guy wasn’t paying for her outing once again. I simply texted her back stating “I am at the ER right now with my grandpa and grandma, grandpa had a stroke episode and we’re trying to see how severe it is”. I get no reply back from her for 2 hours. I simply chalk it up to her being busy, or one of us being in a dead zone or whatever. I didn’t have time to worry about that as I was worried about the condition my grandpa was in and just keeping my grandma calm. Thankfully it was a mild stroke, no major issues. We were at the hospital for 7 hours.
I get my grandparents back home, call work to let her know how my grandpa is doing and that I will be in tomorrow for work. Said friend texts me to complain about how crummy her trip to the aquarium went. At this point, tensions were high, but I simply sent her a message saying “I’m guessing you didn’t receive my last message that said that I was in the ER with my grandpa who had a mild stroke. I had been in the ER for about 7 hours now”. Her response was “no”. Now, if you’ve made it this far into reading this whole thing, first off thank you and congrats. Secondly, you’re probably wondering “why does this whole mini essay about this chick matter?” or something to that extent. Well I don’t know about you good people here, but normally if a friend or loved one or just someone you kinda sorta know states that they were in the ER, and they don’t work in the medical field, most people’s reactions would be “what happened?”, “is everything ok?”, “are you ok?”, “is X person ok?”, etc. ad nauseum. There was no concern shown from her. NONE. No call to see if everything is ok, no text to ask if everything is ok, NOT A GODDAMN THING.
Why is that such a big deal? Offering compassion does not cost you a damn dime. All I wanted from her was a simple act of compassion. I had not asked for much from her over the time we had been friends. Just the one time I really could use it, its just lost on her. She continues to text me to ask me if we’re still going to hang out before she leaves. I’m just left in just disbelief at the whole thing. I don’t really text her after that, stating I’m busy. She’s constantly bugging me about this, all while I’m telling her that I have family issues to tend to. I finally agree to see her again, despite wanting to rip her head off. I meet with her and the guy, and I simply tell them in person what’s going on and what happened at the ER. Her friend offered concern, all while she’s sitting there stuffing her face and changing the subject. I ask for the bag that she borrowed from me from our previous trip out, she gives it to me and I make an excuse to leave early. She still isn’t getting it, so I ask for her friends’ number. I say my goodbyes and she states that she wants to visit again sometime.
The day she’s leaving, after she’s on the plane, I text the guy she’s been staying with. I tell him during this whole trip that she essentially used him, complained about him and his family the whole time to me, that the person she was being all secretive about on the phone was some guy she likes better than you, and that she’s in a relationship with someone back home and has been with said guy for 3 years and lives with him. He was not happy about this and rightfully so as he liked her. This of course led to them both arguing, and her contacting me via text about this and why I did it. I completely ignored everything. I felt that I owed her nothing after all of this. Her last message to me was “cool beans. we don’t have to be normal about it. But thanks for betraying my confidence and trust in the first place. You’re a shit friend and I hope you’re happy with yourself. Thanks for throwing our decade long friendship out the window”. She then proceeded to remove me from facebook and any other social media that we shared.
Am I really a shit friend? Am I really a horrible person for doing these things? Did I have to do what I did? Was it worth it? I will let you draw your own conclusions as yes I know that I didn’t have to do what I did and I could have been the one who takes the high road on this, but when you’re under a lot of stress due to work and deadlines and family issues, you tend to do shitty things. I grappled with the whole thing and felt awful for doing what I did, but at the same time I felt that no amount of talking would really get through to her about how much damage had been done. In some senses I do feel like a major weight was lifted from my shoulders as I really didn’t want to have a friend who didn’t understand basic concern for others.
November 2016: Still working at the storage unit place. The lady I’m working for has not been healing well due to not listening to her doctors orders. The maintenance man that the owner hired for the place injures himself horrifically, with what I assume his shin bone is jutting out of his skin. He tells us that he slipped down a ladder and that was about it. He’s rushed to the ER by ambulance. The owner then gets his son-in-law to work for him as maintenance man to replace the injured one. Son-in-law decides to have me start on a project for him, that requires me to make an excel spreadsheet of all the tenants who rent at the storage unit with all their info.
He tells me that the owner needs this info in digital form for insurance purposes and I agree to it since it does make sense, but it detracts from my other duties with caring for the lady I’m working for as well as the other office duties. I do this anyways as it seems like they might actually change the setup there so that its not all hand-written and a bit easier to keep track of as well as back up. Etsy orders are flooding in for the early holiday rush and I’m trying to keep on top of it all.
This marks the first thanksgiving where we don’t celebrate together as a family. My grandma simply just didn’t want to put up with all the fuss, my Mom and my nephew ended up going to Las Vegas for a football championship game for my nephew as he’s been in little league football all through the fall and his team had done really well and made it to the championship game. I couldn’t go with them as I had to watch the farm, as my Mom is a caretaker of a small school district owned farm and the animals need to eat everyday. My Uncle and Aunt both work demanding jobs that they aren’t able to get many days off so they weren’t able to come down for the holidays. My brother went up to his girlfriends parents place, so it was a bit odd and slightly depressing.
Only weird highlight was that I had a short convo with Dennis Wedin on instagram and I mentioned that I hope to send him and Jonatan some little handmade gifts when I get the chance to make them.
December 2016: Still working at the storage unit place. I end up getting sick near the beginning of the month with a cold/flu. I work through it like normal, just making sure to prepare myself as best as I can at work with plenty of fluids, a blanket, a heater, meds, tissue, etc.
This time it gets interesting. Storage unit place also houses cars, trucks, and RV parking spaces. Plenty of people rent these spaces, including one guy who states that he has an old Porsche and its been back there for 10+ years. He’s hoping to restore it for his kids despite none of them being super interested in it. Well with said spreadsheet work, I’m finding a ton of discrepancies as to whom is actually in the units and spaces that they say they are. Lots of calls have to be made, lots of running through the lot to check what is where, etc. Porsche guy is one of those discrepancies, and we ask for him to come down and confirm which space he’s in.
Well apparently his Porsche is missing as it is nowhere to be found on the lot. He has his sister come down with him and she’s yelling at me and the lady I’m working for, accusing us of stealing his car. The sister then calls the cops to come down and question us. Now there’s no way in hell I or the old lady I’m working for has stolen his car. For one, I had no clue what he had until November when he came to pay his bill. For two, most of the cars that are stored at this particular storage unit place are not in running condition, his included. He had stated this back in November that it doesn’t run and needed a ton of work on it.
One cop accuses myself and the old lady as well, despite what they need to do is run the VIN, and look at the records at the DMV as to who it had been registered to. For three, the Porsche guy hadn’t even checked on his car ever since he had parked it here for 10 years. No “hey I’ve been paying for this for 10+ years and if its so important to me I should at least check on it”. The guy hadn’t non-opted his vehicle and simply stopped paying any sort of registration on the vehicle. So now I’m a week away from christmas, still sick with whatever super cold/flu that is going around, I’ve been stressed due to busting my ass on getting etsy orders out in time for christmas, working 6 days a week in the office, and now I’m being accused of grand theft auto.
After the cops finally decide to actually do some investigating, they found out that the car had been stolen in May 2012. Someone towed it off the lot that also rents at the storage unit, hence why they had access to the lot. Since he had rented the spot so long ago, the old lady didn’t remember or even know what he had back there. Since he hadn’t registered it in so long, the person who stole it got some sort of lein title for the car and fixed it to running condition as someone about 500 miles away is driving it around.
Christmas was rather uneventful as I was finally better from being sick and was trying to relax from everything. Got things for my mom and her bf as well as something for my nephew and a few friends of mine. For my birthday I went and watched Moana with my Mom. Ended up sick again as the next day I ended up throwing up. Whether it was the food or just round 2 of super cold/flu, I didn’t know but didn’t really care as I wanted it to be gone. Didn’t do much of anything for new years as I worked and so did a bunch of my friends, top it off with still being sick and not wanting to be around people and spread it around.
If you’ve made it to the end of this, I truly do thank you as it was a long bunch of bullshit that you honestly didn’t have to read and I could have summed up a lot shorter but didn’t. I hope you enjoyed this small peak into my life. I will eventually update this with January 2017 and February 2017 or just simply make a second post if anyone cares to see the rest of this out. Thanks again.
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dress shirt - #olympmen with extra long measurements #longasfuck - took the collar off #diy pants - #black #jeans #blackjeans from #peekundcloppenburg shoes - #nikefreerunsp #blackclothing #outfitoftheday #militaryinspiredfashion #casiowatches #concrete #allblackclothing #monochrome #silhouette #simplefits #schwarzekleidung #neuss #stadtamrhein #urbanfashion #blvckclothing #dressintentionally #urbanbackground #ootdmen #wdywtstreetwear #urbanfits #greybackground #vielzulangearme #nike
#outfitoftheday#silhouette#dressintentionally#diy#concrete#longasfuck#urbanbackground#stadtamrhein#simplefits#urbanfits#wdywtstreetwear#schwarzekleidung#peekundcloppenburg#nike#vielzulangearme#black#greybackground#blackclothing#olympmen#allblackclothing#monochrome#jeans#militaryinspiredfashion#blvckclothing#blackjeans#ootdmen#neuss#casiowatches#urbanfashion#nikefreerunsp
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Riso sticker alert☄️ Extra long riso sticker is in the pipe📏! Full gold metallic ink. We designed it for decorative frieze (you can loop them) or whatever you want to, but with 50cm you can have many ideas ! Available soon on the shop with new stickers... #sizedoesmatter #risography #risocando #risostickers #goldmetallic #hieroglyphs #riso #risoprint #risographprint #risographie #printstudio #printmaker #printisnotdead #extralong #longasfuck #design #stickerdesign #instariso (à Oberkampf)
#hieroglyphs#printmaker#goldmetallic#riso#risographprint#design#risoprint#stickerdesign#risocando#printstudio#risographie#extralong#risostickers#longasfuck#printisnotdead#instariso#sizedoesmatter#risography
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Longasfuckitis
Namely, the writer’s disease that makes your chapters longer than you want to edit but you end up giving in because they can’t be any other way.
Halfway through editing chapter 10, it will be up before tonight!
#writing#fan fic writing#fanfiction#ao3fic#why the fuck do I write so fast?#Our Story Whatever It Was#As Long As We Know The Truth#chapter 10#random Besaster crap
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Unfinished
captainAquarius [Alistair ] joined chat. ~~ 1 ~~
troublesomeAvail [TA] joined chat. ~~ 2 ~~
Alistair : greeting2
TA: Hello.
TA: ((crap, do you have a character description?
TA: ((maybe a reference perhaps?
Alistair : ((Yeah, A;i2tair i2 a ta;; gr9wn tr9;; he'2 a 2eadwe;;er and a pirate
Alistair : ((he'2 my 9c'2 ance2t9r.
TA: (( D d anG WAIT
Alistair : ((yea?
TA: ((Currently I'm roleplaying as a male, are you alright with either gender or are you looking for a female?
Alistair : ((a;; 9f my 9c'2 are gay a2 he;;
TA: ((sorry, people do have preferences sometimes
TA: ((yES HOT DADS
TA: ((but 19 year olds hah.
Alistair : ((hah
TA: (( Here's Evan
Alistair : ((9h my g9g cuteeee
TA: ((sHIT
Alistair : ((what?
TA: ((He's actually a bisexual selfish asshole
TA: ((also I gET FLUSTERED WHEN PEOPLE CALL MY CHARACTERS Cu te
Alistair : ((my 9c make2 dad j9ke2
Alistair : ((;ike a ;9t be prepared
TA: (( dAD JOKES
Alistair : ((im 29rry man
TA: ((please take me away I can't even deal with my own father's "dad jokes"
TA: ((anyways, would you mind starting the roleplay
Alistair : greeting'2 ;ad.
Alistair : ((piratene22 i2 9ver 9,0000
TA: ((hEAVY BREATHING
Alistair : ((XD))
TA: *Evan quickly darts his gaze around until finally realizing the ALIEN was talking to him, he quirked a brow* Me?
Alistair : ye2 y9u*he ti;t2 hi2 had t9 the 2ide* jegu2 fuck y9u're 29 2h9rt..*he grumb;e2 m9re t9 him2e;f then the 9ther*
TA: ((sHIT also I'm sorry, I know you started the rolplay but I just wanted to get to know a little more about your oc, so its technically starting over
Alistair : ((what d9 y9u wanna kn9w?
TA: ((wo w then Alistair should be a freAKING GIANT
Alistair : ((he i2 rea;;y rea;;y ta;;
TA: ((nono- about the [/br] Alistair : greeting2 [/br] TA: Hello.
TA: ((sHIT
TA: ((Alistair : greeting2
TA: Hello.
TA: ((that thing
TA: ((sorry bbcoding is failing me right no
TA: ((w
Alistair : ((9h, he'2 a fancy fuck
TA: ((and so is my keyboard
Alistair : ((29 he 2ay2 "Greeting2" in2tead 9f he;;9. huehue
TA: *He looks up to the older man- troll, actually. His eyes narrow* Excuse me?
TA: ((where is this roleplay even GOING
Alistair : huh?*9h 2hit he heard y9u 2hittttt* excu2e y9u fr9m what? ((i d9nt even kn9ww))
TA: *His left eye twitches, his face shows anger for a mere second. Yeah, no. This guy is taller than you, better not mess with him. He clears his throat, avoiding the question the other had spat out* Ahem-
TA: Who are you and what are you going here
TA: ((Quick throw up a setting for these two dorks
Alistair : I am A;i2tair J9ne2 captain 9f the Jawne2 Ki2t and c9mmander 9f a third rank. Wh9 are y9u? ((thr9w up 9r d9wn
TA: ((Up, duh.
Alistair : ((idk
TA: *Shit- alright a high ranked cOMMANDER OF SOME HIGH MIGHTY SHIP THAt he's never heard about. Definetly a guy he shoudn't mess with. He quickly sucks in a small breath and splurts out his name* Evan
TA: ((Hah guess what, fun fact: Evan avoids saying his last name beCAUSE ITS LAME AS FUCK. DONT ASK HIM FOR IT
Alistair : nice t9 met y9u Evan *he b9wed in a f9rma; man9r and gave the 9ther a 2ma;; grin*
Alistair : ((;9ve fun fact2))
TA: *SHIT THis guy was fancy. No matter what, a small smile crept up his face, he enjoyed the formal greetings and the bowing, he quickly shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans* So- Alistair, what brings you to (FUCK I DONT KNOW IM JUST GOING TO BARF THIS RIGHT HERE) the beach?
TA: ((HAAAAAAH we could always change the setting if you want to I'm horrible with settings
Alistair : *p9int2 t9 a giant 2hip* that'2 my 2hip.
TA: *Duh, Evan, of course it's his ship. How could've you missed something so blatantly obvious like that. He turned towards the direction of the massive naval ship. His eyes widened in surprise* Pretty coo- Impressive I mean.
Alistair : *he pu2hed Evan 9ut 9f the way ju2t bef9re a b9x 9f carg9 hit him* W9u;d y9u idi9t2 pay attenti9n! y9u a;m92t cru2hed a chi;d!
TA: *A CHILD- EXCUSE ME? A child. HAH. Of course. Evan quickly stepped away from Alistair's reach after being pushed away from the heavy looking load of cargo. His face reddened with both anger and embarassment whoa look at that (dORKY) fierce gaze.* I'm not a child!
TA: ((** I. Am. Not. A. Child.
Alistair : y9u are t9 me im 9ver thirty 2weep2 9;d.*he picked up the b9x and threw it back t9 the 2hip*
TA: *Shit, the guy wasn't just casually formal, but he was IMPRESSIVELY STRONG. He suckd in another breath then exhaled slowl- cRAP NO. Evan began coughing LIKE CRAZY. Nice work, dust* SHIT
Alistair : are y9u a;right?*he carefu;;y patted the 2ma;;er ma;e'2 back making 2ure t9 watch hi2 2trength*
TA: *With a wheeze here and there, he managed to catch his breath. Those careful pats did help. Thanks, strong handsome naval man from the sea*
Alistair : geez that wa2 w9r2e then the time Shade g9t 2and in hi2 gi;;'2, are y9u a;right?
TA: Haaaa *He quickly wiped whatever excess saliva (or something) from his mouth* Yeah, thanks...for that. *He sighed at the mentioning of someone he didin't know. He sighed in a rather- annoyed matter?* I'm alright.
Alistair : Shade'2 my decendent by the way*he p9inted t9 a very very 2h9rt tr9;; wh9 wa2 hanging 9f the 2ide 9f the 2hip* y9u aughta be carefu; kid.*it wa2n't c;ear wh9 he wa2 ta;king tw9 but it wa2 pr9b;ey b9th 9f y9u.*
troublesomeAvail [TA] disconnected.
troublesomeAvail [TA] joined chat. ~~ 2 ~~
TA: ((slow internet sorry
Alistair : ((n9 pr9b;em dude
TA: *He nodded, descendant, of course. He quietly cursed at himself, it was still something blatantly obvious-* Right.
Alistair : *he g;anced d9wn at the 2ma;;er ma;e* y9u 2ure y9u're a;right?
TA: *He looked up at him* Yeah. *He smiled, crossing his arms* Pretty sure I'm jst fine.
Alistair : *he 2mi;ed back revea;ing a few 2harp fang2* g99d.
TA: *ouch. Sharp fangs*
TA: *His mind is literally blind, he can't think of anything right now* Uh-
Alistair : d9n't w9rry kid i d9n't bite. hard.
TA: ((lAUGHS AT THE THOUGHT OF LOVE BITES
Alistair : ((hehehehehe))
TA: *He shuffles back a tad, a step or two maybe. Bored, he looks down at his watch, suddenly, his watch is very interesting.*
Alistair : *ti;t2 hi2 head t9 the 2ide* what2 that?
TA: oh wow look a that- Uh... What?
Alistair : there2 a thing 9n y9u're wri2t.*he'2 never 2een a watch ;ike that bef9re*
TA: *He looks back up at the STRONG HANDSOME NAVAL MAN FROM THE SEA* Oh- this little thing? It's a -er- Clock you can wear on your wrist? I guess.
Alistair : the 2imb;e2 9n it ;99k weird..*he pu;;2 9ut a p9cket watch and 9pen2 it, 9n the ;eft it ha2 a picture 9n the right it ha2 a few diffrent A;ternian 2imb;e2*
TA: Symbols? *He frowns, leaning closer to the alien watch* ... what are those? *He narrows his eyes, focusing on the nonsense scribbles*
Alistair : number2.*he 2aid in a 2imp;e t9ne ;ike it wa2 9bvi9u2*
TA: *He tilts his head* Hey, yeah- man. They don't look like numbers at all.
Alistair : we;; it i2 in A;ternian it mu2t ;99k a2 2trange t9 y9u a2 th92e d9 t9 me
TA: *He extends his wrist, then looks up at the STRONG HANDSOME NAVAL MAN FROM THE SEA* Ah- okay then, these are out numbers, hah- you know... Human numbers. *DAMN HE SOUNDS SO STUPID HE DROPS HIS ARM BESIDE HIM, ITS USELESS HE SOUNDS LIKE A CLUELESS BASTARD*
Alistair : radica;!*he ;99k2 way 9ver;y impre22ed* th92e thing2 ;99k 29 c99;!
TA: *Yeah- wait no. What is he doing? He looks up at the man again. Was he trying to make a fool out of him? He sighed and turned away from the STRONG HANDSOME NAVAL MAN FROM THE SEA* Sheesh
TA: ((HAH THATNICKNAME IS GREA T
Alistair : ((be2t nickname))
Alistair : *he ti;t2 hi2 head t9 the 2ide* did i ann9y him?*he mumb;e2 t9 him2e;f whi;e hi2 fin2 dr99p*
TA: *He looks down at his watch* Ah- wow look at the time, *His head turns to the side, so he could look at the STRONG HANDSOME NAVAL MAN FROM THE SEA* I- I have to go. Hah. *EVAN STOP LOOKING FOR EXCUSES JESUS CHRIST*
Alistair : 9-9h a;right*hi2 fin2 dr99p a bit m9re but he make2 them 2tand back up again "there i2 n9 way im 2h9wing weakne22 t9 a wrigg;er!" he turn2 back t9 hi2 2hip* it wa2 nice meeting y9u..
TA: *WAIT NO what was that- cRAP DID THOSE THINGS JUST MOVE*
Alistair : *the fin2 kept twitching*
TA: *Evan's eyes widen at the EVER SO SLIGHT MOVEMENT OF TH O s e F ins sH IT*
Alistair : *twitch twitch* why are y9u 2taring at my fin2?
TA: Ah- wait. *He turns to face the STRONG HANDSOME NAVAL MAN FROM THE SEA. His eyes narrowed* What- what are those things?
TA: ((SHIT LATE SEND
Alistair : there fin2.
Alistair : they he;p me hear thing2.*they twitch again*
TA: *He inched closer to the STRONG HANDSOME NAVAL MAN FROM THE SEA* Why do they move?
Alistair : becau2e they can a;; tr9;; ear2 m9ve but fin2 2h9w em9ti9n2
TA: *He kinda just- proceeds and reaches up to gENTLY POKE A FIN. On his tiptoes, of course. He's probably too tall* Do they really?
Alistair : a-ah!*hi2 wh9;e face turned purp;e* d-d-d9n't t9uch them p;ea2e!
troublesomeAvail's connection timed out. Please don't quit straight away; they could be back.
troublesomeAvail [TA] joined chat. ~~ 2 ~~
TA: *He takes a step back, his hand flinching away from his fins- SHIT WHAT DID HE DO* FUCK- Wait no what happened- Why is your face like that?
TA: ((CHRIST.
Alistair : there um...h-h9w d9 i put thi2.. 2en2itive.
TA: *He nods, shoving his hands back into his pockets* Yeah- sorry about that.
Alistair : *ca;m d9wn b;u2h p;ea2eeee!* heh h-heh...*he ju2t f;u2he2 even darker*
TA: Nono- seriously what's wrong with your face?
Alistair : what?*he reaced up t9 t9uch it* 9h g9g.*he pu;;2 hi2 cape up t9 c9ver hi2 face* n9thing i2 wr9ng!
TA: I- should I be worried? Its all purple *His eyebrow knitted into a worried expression* Really- shit What did I do?
Alistair : my b;99d i2 purp;e. i'd be c9ncerned if it wa2 a different c9;9r.*he c9ughed in an awkward man9r*
TA: Ah- then why is your face all- *woowwoww did it just NOW hit him?* Are you sick? *SHIT SON NO. He walked around the seadweller, circling him- trying to get a better view of his face*
Alistair : *he kinda ju2t 2;unk deeper int9 hi2 cape*
TA: ((WHAt is going on in this roleplay anymore from cool guys they went to dorky weebs
Alistair : ((it wa2 the finn22222222
TA: ... Hey- Alistair. I'm serious about the sick thing. *He frowned, his expression is serious, he's probably serious. Definetly serious.*
Alistair : i'm n9t 2ick..*he ;et 9ut a 2;ight 2queak* ju2t 2;ight;y embarra22ed.
TA: Why are you embarrassed?
Alistair : y9u t9uched my fin2... n9 9ne2 ever d9ne that bef9re.
TA: I- SHIT. CRAP. shouldn't have done that. FUCK. I FUCKED UP. Sorry.
Alistair : n9n9n9n9n9! it'2 n9t y9u're fau;t y9u didn't kn9w*he waved hi2 hand2 a bit*
TA: *He rubbed the back of his neck* Sorry.
Alistair : it'2 a;right y9u didn't kn9w kid.*he tugged 9n the edge 9f hi2 cape* chi;; kid
Alistair : ((the ;a2t part wa2 2upp92ed t9 2ay kidd9
TA: ((it's chill
Alistair : ((aight
TA: *He groaned- Kiddo wasn't one of his prefered names, but that sure did remind him of his age* Right. Okay.
Alistair : yeah im ju2t g9nna..*he 2at 9n the gr9und and hudd;ed in2ide 9f hi2 cape*
TA: *He just stood there- awkwardly* Uh-
Alistair : *he ju2t gr9aned* fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!
TA: WAIT NO SHIT WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME
Alistair : fucking fin2. fuck!*and thi2 i2 where he rea;ize2 hi2 cape i2nt 29und pr99f* 2hit.
TA: SERIOUSLY ALISTAIR SHIT IM SORRY FUCK
Alistair : it'2 n9t y9u it'2 them*he p9inted at the 2hip again* there a;; ;aughing there a22e2 9ff up there
TA: *He began slowly backing away from Alistair and the ship* Should I just- go?
Alistair : y9u can 2tay if y9u want if y9u d9n't mind th92e a22h9;e2.
TA: Ah... o-okay then. *He quietly just- stands there, hands in his pocket and everything*
Alistair : *at thi2 p9int in time 9ne 9f the crew member2 th9ught it w9u;d be funny t9 ye;; "'BOUT TIME YOU GOT LAID CAPIN'"* 9h my g9g SHUT UP YOU IDIOTS!*he threw a r9ck at the 2hip*
TA: ((jESUS CHRIST
Alistair : ((my c9u2in 2aid t9 write that im 29 29rry
TA: ((NO ITS GREAT
Alistair : ((kay
TA: Wait- WHAT
Alistair : 9h my g9gggggg!*he whined ;9w;y*
TA: Uh- Alistair do you want to uh- ...leave?
TA: ((SHIT I DONT KNWO HOW TO CONTINUE THIS
Alistair : ye2 p;ea2e!*he ju2t kinda 2cramb;ed t9 get away, w9;f whi2;e2 f9;;9wed thi2 acti9n th9ugh*
Alistair : ((idk mate
TA: ((wait why wolf whines
Alistair : ((whi2;e
Alistair : ((n9t whine2
TA: ((aah sorry skipped that 2 there
Alistair : ((my quirk i2 weird a2 we;;
TA: ((nono it's okay I just tend to read a bit fast sometimes
Alistair : ((aight mate
TA: Ah- wait up!
Alistair : 2-29rry*he 2;9wed d9wn and 2t99d up 2traight*
TA: *I GUESS HE'S BEGIND HIM BECAUSE IM GUESSING ALISTAIR HAS LONG LEGS*
Alistair : *;9ng a22 ;eg2*
TA: *HOT long ass leg*
TA: *you mean*
Alistair : *h9;y 2hit ya2*
TA: Hey- jeez, you're fast.
TA: Hey what was that all about- you know... The people back there.
TA: (( all the hays
Alistair : yeah 29rry ab9ut that, it'2 thank2'2 t9 the c9re training..... ummmmmmm.........that wa2 my crew...there a;; bitche2..
TA: Ah- yeah, okay. Understandable
Alistair : 29rry.. ab9ut a;; that back there..yeah..
TA: Ah- *His face glushes a semi-dark red* They said something about getting- you know uhm
Alistair : i kn9w...*he pu;;ed the h99d 9f hi2 cape 9ver hi2 face*
TA: *He crossed his arms and cleared his throat* Which is ridiculous I mean-
Alistair : 9f c9ur2e it i2 i mean were n9t even the 2ame 2pecie2* fuck that hurt t9 2ay*
TA: Y-yeah. *Sh iT HE'S THROWING HIS CHANCEs AWya yf UCK *
Alistair : *he ju2t kind 9f 2ighed* and i'm 9;d..
TA: Imeanicoulddigit
TA: *SHIT*
TA: *FUCK*
Alistair : *he bar;ey heard that and it made him 2queak ;9ug;y*
Alistair : *2hit 9h g9g n9 n9t the 2queak*
TA: *HISFACEJUSTFLUSHESADARKRED,fuck*
TA: SHIT
TA: *He just- cleared his throat* AHEM
Alistair : *2queak* f-fuck*2queak 2queak*
TA: *SO WHERE ARE THEY HEADING, EXACTLY*
Alistair : *idk a c9ffee 2h9p?*
TA: *okay*
TA: *neat*
Alistair : *c9ffee i2 the b9mb*
TA: ((yeye it is
Alistair : ((fuk yea
TA: *As they make their way to the coffee shop, he just decides to, well, not make a sound. It's already awkward the way it is*
Alistair : *a2 akward a2 it i2 the 2queaking n9i2e2 2ti;; haven't 2t9pped hi2 face get2 darker and darker each time*
TA: *WOW LOOK A COFFEE SHOP NEAT WOW*
TA: *iT'S SO INTERESTING*
Alistair : *9h thank g9g*
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TA: *He sneaks glances at Alistair, his face blushing furiously* crap
Alistair : *the piece 9f hi2 face that wa2 vi2ib;e wa2 2uch a dark purp;e that he ;99ked ;ike he wa2 dying*
TA: *He's become the color purple itself*
TA: *He lives the color purple*
Alistair : *cue rand9m n9te2 fr9m that fucking mu2ica;*
TA: *oh my god*
Alistair : *i've never 2een it but i kn9w there2 a mu2ica;*
TA: *bless*
Alistair : *mu2ica;;;;*
TA: ((*SHTI I JUST WANT THEM TO F uck *
Alistair : (( 9h my g9d that w9u;d be the be2t thing. the fucking fin thing made me ;augh my a22 9f))
TA: ((lIKE LOV e biTe s and FIN s
Alistair : ((fack! XD
TA: ((iMAGINE IT
Alistair : ((i am i ju2t ch9cked 9n my water!
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TA: ((lIKE EVAN IS GOING TO CHOKE ON THAT D
TA: ((Ha H
TA: ((I AM TRASH KILL ME NOW
Alistair : ((9h my fucking g9d im dying
TA: ((you better not
Alistair : ((fuckkkk
TA: ((*WHEEZING
Alistair : (( i keep ch9cking 2hit!
TA: ((bECAUSE ITS THE D
Alistair : ((fuck!
TA: ((but seriously though im serious about that sex thing
Alistair : ((Same here but i cant rp t9p2
Alistair : ((i fucking 2uck at t9p2
TA: ((shIT NO ITS OKAY JUST DO YOUR BEST I SUCK AT SUB
Alistair : ((9kay thank2
Alistair : ((i 2ha;; try!
TA: ((lETS BOTH USE CHARACTERS THAT SUCK AT SEX THAT IS GR9 SHIT RIGHT THERE
Alistair : ((there in a c9ffee 2h9p what d9 we d9))
TA: ((jUMP CUT TO THE PART WHERE THEY'RE AT EITHER OF THEIR HOMES
Alistair : ((;et2 g9 t9 y9u're character2 h9u2e i d9nt think they wanna g9 back t9 the 2hip
TA: ((what is grammar and nouns anymore- yes. gr8 fantasTIC
Alistair : ((fan fucking ta2tic
TA: ((REALLY NICE HIGH BED
TA: ((LIKE- HOTEL BEDS BUT NOT REALLY
Alistair : ((2hit
TA: ((ironic because im in a hotel lmao
Alistair : ((;ma9 brah
TA: ((yeaH BUT HOW DO WE CONTINUE
Alistair : (( i d9nt kn9w. ;ike maybe y9u're character ju2t kinda t9uche2 the fin2 again ju2t t9 2ee what happen2
TA: *okay- lets see, so as Evan drops the bags of goodies and coffee on the kitchen sink, he makes his way to his houch. Yes, nice*
TA: *It's a rather big house, yo- why? No one knows*
Alistair : *A;i2tair ju2t kinda 2it2 9n the f;99r and think2 ab9ut rem9ving hi2 cape*
Alistair : *he'2 t9tta;y n9t ;99king at Evan'2 a22, n9pe! n9t ;99king at a;;!*
TA: *Evan turns to the Alistair on the floor* Wait- why are you sitting on the floor, come take a seat on the couch. pft
TA: *He sLOWLY LOWERS THAT ASS ONTO THE CUSHION*
TA: *NICE*
Alistair : *he m9ve2 up 9nt9 the c9uch* h9;y fuck it2 29ft!
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TA: ((SHit it didin't send
Alistair : ((wh9p2
TA: Yeah! *Evan offers a really nice smile and- whOOPS, as he reaches for the lamp-switch, which is nexT TO THE HANDSOME SEA MAN, his hand accidentally skims tHAT DAMN FIN*
Alistair : *2queak! ;ight t9uche2 were even w9r2e fuck there went the b;u2h again*
TA: aH- *He stops midway- nOT EVEN BOTHERING TO TURN THE LAMP ON* shit
Alistair : *he 2hivered a bit*
TA: *He placed a hand on Alistair's cheek* Shit- Man, you're at it again are you- *Ey, that's when he realizes what he's doing and bLUSHES FURIOUSLY LIKE A MAD MAN*
Alistair : *2queak* a-ah y9u're ah.. cheek...
TA: SHIT YEAH- SORRY *His hand flinches away, AND HE KINDA ALSO DOES MOVE A BIT FURTHER, BUT IS TRAPPED BY THAT ARM REST*
TA: *DAMN you ARM REST*
Alistair : *he turned even darker then hi2 fin2 2tarted f;apping wi;d;y*
TA: *He turned towards Alistair* SSHIT fuck LOOK IM SORRY I DIDIN'T MEAN IT
Alistair : they w9nt 2t9p f;apping*he whined*
TA: *hE LOOKED AROUND FRANTICALLY- SHIT WHAT DOES HE DO* What do I do How do I stop it?
Alistair : i d9nt kn9w thi2 ha2 never happened bef9re
TA: ((SHIT DUDE THIS IS SO DORKY I I DONT THINK THE PLOT IS PROGRESSING
TA: I- fuck
TA: SORRY FOR HURTING YOU *Lmao he thinks it actually hurts after Alistair said "they're sensible"*
TA: *lAUGHS*
Alistair : ((it2 making me ;augh)) hurt?
TA: ((shit i meANT TO PUT THAT AS
TA: ((OOC
Alistair : n9n9n9n9n9n9 it d92n't hurt ((i g9t it))
TA: AH- what?
TA: Then why does it make you... You know, act like that?
Alistair : they d9n't hurt it2 a uh... fuck.. a um p-p;ea2urab;e experience when 29me9ne t9uche2 them...
TA: UH- *SHit LOOK AT THT RED FACE- WAIT NO YOU CAn't ssee it because he's turned away from him*
Alistair : im 29 29rry.*he hid in2ide hi2 cape 9nce m9re*
TA: shit- FUCK SHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT
Alistair : *the fin2 keep f;apping* 9h g9g it g9t w9r2e
TA: *SHIT FUCK DO SOMETHING*
TA: *CAN'T BECAUSE EVAN IS CURRENTLY SO EMBARASSEDSSD*
TA: *I DOUBT HE CAN EVEN BREATHE*
Alistair : are y9u... um a;right*he p9ked the 9ther*
TA: Yeah *Wheeze* Doing Great
Alistair : *pat2 hi2 back* y9u're wheezing again.
TA: I- Can't breathe
Alistair : d9 y9u need cpr?
TA: *YES* w- WHat *Evan turns back to Alistair, HIS FACE FlushING A FURIOUS RED*
TA: ((Als o i gotta go for 4 hours maybe? PLEASE DONT LEAVE BECAUSE IM REALLY ENJOYING THIS ROLEPLAY
Alistair : cpr? that he;p2 breathing right?
TA: ((AND THATS REALLY DAMN RARE
TA: I- YEAH?
TA: ((Fuc kckckkkk if you have skype add me: thatonerpdork eyy I'm shoob
Alistair : ((d9 y9u have tumb;r inca2e i have t9 ;eave?
Alistair : ((i d9nt have 2kype
TA: ((yes yes- doobymcgurk
TA: ((NYOOOM
Alistair : ((mintbunny2theface
Alistair : h9w d9 y9u d9 cpr?
TA: ((SHIT I PROMISE ILL BE BACK IN 4 HOURS MAYBE 3 OR 2
Alistair : ((i may have t9 g9 but i';; 2tay if i can
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TA: ((sHIT IM BACK IM SO SORRY
TA: ((that was longer than expected sorry
Alistair : ((thank g9g
Alistair : ((i th9ught y9u f9rg9t
TA: ((SHIT I WOULD NEVER
Alistair : ((that2 g99d t9 kn9w mat
Alistair : ((mate**
TA: (( ;0 mat
Alistair : ((typ9
Alistair : ((2tupid fucking aut9 c9rrect
TA: ((anyways, after this huge long wall of timeouts, shall we contINUE THIS CPR SHIT
Alistair : ((if y9u want t9 ;et me re read the ;a2t part
Alistair : ((aight cpr.
TA: *Oh nO- Evan blushes- JUST LOOK AT HIS FACE HE LOOKS LIKE A CHERRY. He covers his face and burries his nose into his hANDS* FORGET IT
Alistair : *he ti;t2 hi2 head in c9nfu2i9n* i think y9u breath int9 pe9p;e when y9u d9 cpr? i d9n't kn9w..
TA: Forget it
Alistair : 29 y9u're breathing a;right n9w?
TA: I- I guess. Yeah. Probably.
Alistair : g99d!*he retreated t9 the f;99r*
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TA: *He sighed, uncovering his face, the blush had faded to a soft pink. He groaned, relaxing his elbows on his thighs and letting his head hang down- in embarassment- that is*
TA: *HIS GROANS ARE LITERALY: Gahhhhh*
TA: *OCCASIONALLY SOME CUSSING*
Alistair : are y9u 2ure y9u d9n't require cpr?*he wa2 2itting 9n hi2 knee2* y9u're making 2trange n9i2e2.
Alistair : ((by 2itting 9n hi2 knee2 i mean he'2 knee;ing 9n the f;99r))
TA: ((nice knEES
Alistair : ((9ne que2ti9n, d9 y9u kn9w wtf a bara i2?
TA: *He replies with another groan*
TA: ((no
Alistair : i'm g9ing t9 take it that y9u d9 need cpr.
TA: ((I feel like I am supposed to know what it means. Probaby a japanese thing
TA: ((oH YEAH
Alistair : ((neither d9 i but 29me9ne ju2t 2aid my character i2 a bara
TA: ((SAME THING AS YAOI BUT LIKE
TA: ((OLDER
TA: ((SHIT
TA: ((kinky ;0
Alistair : ((h9;y 2hit
TA: *He's not refusing his offer so I guess he doesn need cpr*
TA: **DOES*
Alistair : *he ti;ted the 9ther ma;e2 head back up and pretty much ju2t ki22ed him*
Alistair : *he d92nt kn9w h9w t9 d9 cpr 29 he think2 thi2 i2 h9w it w9rk2*
TA: *CUTE*
TA: *Shit Evan's taken by surprise, is this CPR? Probably not, he's enjoying it though.*
Alistair : *after a few minute2 he pu;;2 back* did i d9 it right?
TA: *His eyes fling open, yeah that was- GREAT* holy shit
TA: did you just kiss me
Alistair : *he ti;ted hi2 head t9 the 2ide, 9ne 9f hi2 fin2 twitched a bit*
Alistair : i th9ught that wa2 cpr?
TA: I- *Shit wait you could have an attractive older man kiss you whenever you run out of breath. GREAT STIMULATION. if you know what I mean*
TA: that was great- uhm- CPR
Alistair : i didn't d9 it right did i?*hi2 fin2 dr99ped* i think 2tep 9ne i2 pre22 ;ip2 t9gether
Alistair : and 2tep tw9 i2 breath int9 the 9ther'2 m9uth, i dunn9
TA: I- nono *Wow look at those exagerated hand motions* You did great.
TA: I feel- uh better!
Alistair : *the fin2 pr9ped back up* 29 i did d9 it right? radica;! i wa2 h9ping i did
TA: *He smiled, somehow the misunderstanding felt like a new level of intimacy- sHIT*
Alistair : *he 2mi;ed back hi2 fang2 g;inted a bit in the ;ight, h9;y 2hit th92e thing2 are 2cary*
TA: *sHI T those aRE FUCKIN G TERRIFYING. His smile dropped, not in a sad way, but mostly in fear* Uh-
Alistair : *he c9vered hi2 m9uth after he 2aw that* 2-29rry.
TA: Ah- no it's fine, I'm not used to looking at... Fangs- the teeth thing is kind of a bother but I'll get used to it- I hope
TA: Uh- Alistair, what do you want to do now?
Alistair : i kn9w they ;99k 2cary but i pr9mi2e i d9n't bite. i d9nt kn9w i haven't been 9n 2h9ur in a ;9ng time
Alistair : what d9 y9u d9 9n ;and?
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TA: I- on land? We usually do nothing? I mean, do you want to do anything?
Alistair : d9 y9u have mu2ic?
TA: Music- Music. Yeah, I do in fact! Ah- what kinds?
TA: *wow look at him, he's so excited he's sitting on the edge of the couch*
Alistair : i d9nt kn9w i ju2t haven't heard any mu2ic in a ;9ng time.
Alistair : ((brb a 2ec
TA: I- gosh wait. Do you like guitar music?
TA: *SHit what kind of question was that*
TA: ((also, don't worry take your time.
Alistair : 9ne 9f my crew member2 2aid 29mething ab9ut a 2kri;;ex guy
Alistair : d9 y9u kn9w him?
TA: AH- that guy yeah
Alistair : *he a;m92t ;99ked excited* mu2ic!
TA: *he just- gets up- halfway, he stops, then turns around* Wait right here.
Alistair : a;right!*he 2nugg;e2 int9 hi2 cape*
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TA: *He's off on the quest to find THE DAMN LAPTOP*
TA: *and hey guess back the dork is back, laptop in hand. A grin stretches across his face* yo.
Alistair : *and thi2 9ne ha2 29me h9w managed t9 get tang;e in2ide 9f hi2 cape*
TA: I- Jesus Christ.
TA: DUDE
Alistair : he;p! im 2tuck!*ha;f 9f it wa2 becau2e he wa2 under the c9uch*
TA: *He proceeded to place the laptop onto the table. GENTLY. He turned his attention back onto AListair* How did you even manage to- holy fuck
TA: *He quickly sat down- looking for ways to rELEASE HIM*
Alistair : i d9nt kn9w! i 2aw 29mething g9 under and i wanted t9 catch it!*he whined 2trugg;ing a bit*
TA: I- WAIT WHAT
Alistair : it wa2 9ne 9f th92e wing thing2 that ;ike ;ight
TA: *wow look at him, he's so frightened. Evan clIMBED ONTO THE SOFA* WHAT THE FUCK A BAT ARE YOU SERIOUS
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Alistair : what2 a bat? i th9ught y9u hit ba2eba;;'2 with th92e
TA: NO I MEAN THE- THE ANIMAL YOU WERE SPEAKING OF
Alistair : it ;99k2 ;ike a butterf;y but it ;ike2 ;ight2!
TA: OH- a moth.
Alistair : a m9th?
TA: Right. Sorry I-
TA: *ggggggggggggggggggoooooooooooooooodddddddddddddddddddddddd*
TA: ((lmao actually misread that
Alistair : wait butterf;y2 are big right? *a2 if 9n cue a giant fucking bat f;ew 9ut fr9m under the 29fa*
Alistair : ((i th9ught that 2aid g9b
TA: *He sighs, climbing off the couch* You almost gave me a fucking hea- SHIT JESUS GET IT AWAY FUCK NO WHAT IS THAT
Alistair : *he tried t9 2cramb;e after it* get back here winged bea2t!
TA: *He whined* how did a bat fucking get into my house
Alistair : i have n9 idea but im g9nna catch it!*he wrigg;ed 9ut 9f hi2 cape and ran after it*
TA: ((sEADOG
Alistair : ((2ead9g2?
TA: ((seadogs
Alistair : ((2ea;i9n2
TA: ((SEA PIECES OF SHIT
Alistair : ((i d9nt under2tand
TA: ((He's just like a huge dog.
TA: ((from the sea
Alistair : ((w99f
TA: I- shit Alistair- where are you going- HEY
Alistair : it went thi2 way!*he jumped and caught it in hi2 hand2* vict9ryyyyy!
TA: I- oh god that is disgusting.
Alistair : d9 y9u wanna 2ee it?
TA: NO
Alistair : a;right*he wa;ked 9ver t9 a wind9w 9pened it and threw the bat 9ut2ide*
TA: *His eyes widened in awe, did he just simply throw a bat out the window*
TA: ((Hah- he hates mice because he finds them gross. Anything relatd to mice, actually.
TA: Shit- Thanks.
Alistair : and 2tay 9ut wingbea2t!*he c;92ed the wind9w* ((i d9nt think bat2 and mice are the 2ame
TA: ((I think they are related, I know they're not the same but- GAH i don't know
TA: ((anything resembling a mouse is just gross to him.
Alistair : ((i dunn9
Alistair : ((what2 hi2 pr9b;em with mice?
TA: ((lmao kids show scared him when he was a young bab
Alistair : ((i th9ught it had 29mething t9 d9 with chucky chee2e2
TA: ((oh my god
TA: ((PROBABLY
Alistair : ((chucky chee2e2, death i2 f9r kid2
Alistair : ((9h my g9d i fee; bad f9r that n9w
TA: ((rip Evan
Alistair : ((p99r babby
TA: I- Jesus Christ
Alistair : ((im 29rry 9h g9d
Alistair : d9 y9u have 29mething i can wa2h my hand2 with?
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TA: Yeah- come along *To the bathroom. Smells of lemon and vanilla. Cool*
TA: *HAH thats why he smells of lemon and vanilla??????????*
Alistair : *he 2neeze2 a bit* ;im9n2
TA: *PROBABLY LIME?*
Alistair : *h9;y fuck im a mind reader!*
Alistair : *LIMONS
Alistair : **
TA: Wait- what about li- Limons? Lime and Lemon?
TA: ((BLESS
Alistair : ;e9n2?
TA: Ah- Lemon?
TA: Lemon.
Alistair : ;em9n
TA: You know, the fruit.
Alistair : yeah i kn9w there th92e ye;;9w thing2 that are rea;;y rea;;y 29ur
TA: Yeah- are you allergic to them?
TA: *wow look lEMON SOAP*
Alistair : n9 im 9n;y a;;ergic t9 du2t*he pick2 up the 29ap*
TA: Oh. Good to know. Don't go on the floor ever again. It's sometimes dusty.. under furniture.
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Alistair : it make2 me 2neeze
TA: *He looks up to the HANDSOME MAN OF THE SEA* I- do you need tissues? Do you need anything, in that matter?
Alistair : n9 n9 im g99d.. 9h 2hit my cape!*he ran back t9 the c9uch*
TA: i- NO WAIT
TA: *Can't catch up to those long legs*
TA: *THOSE DAMN LEGS*
Alistair : cape cape cape*he kne;t d9wn* cape
TA: *He quickly snatched it swsy from his reach* Nono wait-
Alistair : why?
TA: It's probaby going to be dusty...
Alistair : *he 2neezed*
TA: I- SHIT. Look man, I'll just throw this in the washing machine and maybe give it back to you tommorow?
Alistair : 9-9kay*he kinda fe;t bare with9ut the 2tupid cape*
TA: I- Tommorow, alright?
TA: Sorry
Alistair : 9kay.*hi2 fin2 dr99ped*
TA: *He looks up to him again* Wait, nonono, why are your fins dropping- Ah, *He just- reaches for them, and manages to give them a light push* Don't feel down- uhm...
Alistair : *hi2 eye2 widened a bit* d-dude 2en2itive.
TA: *He quickly runs to well, the laundry room- he turned around, halway* ShiT YEAH SORRY GIVE ME A MOMENT *As he walked backwards, he managed to bump his head on the door frame. Evan grunted, then proceeded to properly enter the dAMN ROOM*
Alistair : *he ti;ted hi2 head t9 the 2ide the g9t 9n the c9uch and cur;ed up* cape...*he mumb;ed t9 him2e;f*
TA: *He returned, cape gone, probably washing. Nice- wait why was Alistair in such a condition* Uh- crap.
TA: Should I not have done that?
Alistair : what?*he cur;ed up becau2e it made him c9mf9rtab;e, but he kinda ;99k tiny when he did thi2*
Alistair : thank y9u f9r wa2hing my cape.
TA: You're welcome, I guess... *He sighed, sitting on the couch next to Alistair*
Alistair : *he cur;ed int9 a tiny ba;; h9w the fuck wa2 thi2 even p922ib;e he wa2 a huge a22 tr9;; f9r fuck2 2ake*
TA: Uh- How do fins feel like? *Evan arched an eyebrow, his back slumping against the couch*
Alistair : there uh..*he b;u2hed at the que2ti9n* t-they fee; g-g99d i gue22..
TA: *Hah he's beginning ot ask himself what would happen if he kissed one of them. His cheeks flushed red* R-Right. That sounds- uh- cool.
Alistair : i think there ;ike h9rn2 in a way but m9re 2en2itive a;m92t ;ike grub 2car2 9f gi;;'2 i gue22
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Alistair : ((brb
Alistair : ((give me ab9ut ten 9r twenty minute2 i g9tta d9 29mething rea; quick
TA: ((okay
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Alistair : ((im back
Alistair : ((29rry ab9ut that
TA: ((nono its okay
Alistair : ((a;right thank2
TA: ((with that brb
TA: ((real quick
Alistair : ((kay
Alistair : ((9kay*
TA: ((Back, sorry that was also longer than expected.
Alistair : ((it2 kay
TA: Ah- Horns. Yeah, right almost forgot they were a thing.
TA: I'm not sure I know what the other are?
Alistair : we;;, gi;;2 are the2e ;itt;e 2;it2 9n my neck*he p9inted t9 a few thin ;ine2* they he;p me breath underwater
TA: *Evan nods slowly* Huh. Never seen them before, I guess I don't pay enough attention to your neck.
TA: *Hah not like he's a vampire*
Alistair : there 2ma;; tw9 and grub 2car2 are the2e.*he pu;;ed hi2 2hirt up 9ver hi2 rib cage revea;ing the 2ix b;ack mark2* they were my ;eg2 when i wa2 a wrigg;er
TA: Oh. Legs? Huh. They're sensitive too?
Alistair : yeah if y9u 2cratch them it make2 u2 purr
TA: *His cheeks blush brightly- his thoughts wandering off and- FucCK* Whoah- well, that's uh. Great.
Alistair : yeah, are human2 2en2itive a2 we;;?*he pu;;ed hi2 2hirt back d9wn*
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TA: ((crap okay wait- what are your troll body headcanons
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TA: ((THERE ARE TONS OF THEORIES OUT THERE
Alistair : (( i ju2t think a;; 9f them have grub 2car2 and y9u kn9w tentabu;ge2... and i d9nt kn9w if they have nipp;e2 9r n9t'
TA: ((bellybuttons?
Alistair : ((i dunn9 they w9u;dnt rea;;y need them, ca2e m9ther grub
Alistair : ((didnt they hatch fr9m egg2?
TA: ((nEAT NO BELLY BUTTONS
TA: ((AMAZINGLY FLAT STOMACHS
Alistair : ((i think parp ate my me22age2
Alistair : ((n9pe there it went
Alistair : ((nvm
TA: ((ah- relatable.
Alistair : ((it2 d9ne that twice t9day
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TA: Ah- humans? Humans, well... We have bellybuttons *whoah surprise surprise*
TA: They're- ticklish? *FUCK HE DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT THIS SHIT*
Alistair : y9u have butt9n2 9n y9u're 2t9mach?!
Alistair : *he ;99ked c9mp;eat;y terrified*
TA: Yea- No. It's uh- a little crevice in our skin. After humans are born uh- they get them? Belly buttonns could also poke out of your skin if (they PREFORM A RITUAL AFTER YOU'RE BORN) they give you a belly button a certain way.
TA: *Bless you evan, you're great at explaining human birth*
Alistair : why d9 they d9 that?
TA: Uh- they need to be separated from their mother.
Alistair : y9u're c9nnected t9 y9u're ;u2u2?
TA: They cut off this one cord that connects the human baby to its mother? Basically, yeah.
Alistair : 29 there c9nected by y9u're be;;ie2?
TA: Uh- kinda?
Alistair : h9w d9 y9u f9rm ;ike that th9ugh y9u ju2t hand fr9m y9u're m9m2 be;;y
TA: I- dude, I have no idea.
TA: ((Evan, pleASE
Alistair : can i 2ee it?
Alistair : ((g9d thi2 i2 the be2t thing))
TA: Sure? *Whoah shirt lift and THERE IT IS THERE'S THE STOMACH PIT.*
Alistair : *he p9ked it*
TA: *He fliched, his hands covering and protecting that stomach pit* Oh my god
Alistair : did i d9 29mething wr9ng?
Alistair : i th9ught it wa2 a butt9n..
TA: It's not exactly a button it's just skin. Ticklish skin.
Alistair : tick;i2h?
TA: THAT CONNECTS TO YOUR INNARDS *A smile creeps up his face, ovbiously, he's joking.*
Alistair : huh?*he ;99k2 terrified* 9h g9g!
TA: ((stomach pits are portals to worlds, confirmed
TA: ((*other
Alistair : ((fuck ye2
TA: Uh- there arent many other sensible parts I can think of- *lmao stop thinking with your dick you ass*
Alistair : d9 human2 have bu;ge2?
Alistair : *fuck he didnt mean t9 a2k that 9h 2hit*
TA: .... Bulge? UH- Yeah, actually. I doubt our genetalia is the same though.
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Alistair : 9kay i wa2 ju2t w9nderin'
TA: Ah- what does your genetalia uhm- look like? *SHIT DIDIN'T MEAN TO SAY THAT*
Alistair : um there2 n9t an ea2y way t9 ex2p;ain it.... we;; there2 thi2 thinh ca;;ed a 2heth that they 2tay in2ide en ti;; were ar9u2ed then they c9me 9ut 9r un2heath
TA: Aha- whoah.That's actually very diffrent.
Alistair : 9h and there2 n99k2 tw9
TA: F-From mine, I mean.
TA: FROM ALL MEN I MEAN
TA: ...Nook?
Alistair : what2 y9ur'2 ;ike?
Alistair : yeah n99k.
TA: What's a.. Nook?
Alistair : um, we;; n99k2 are a bit further d9wn fr9m a bu;ge and y9u're partner in2ert2 there bu;ge int9 it en;e22 y9u're a t9p then it2 the 9ther way ar9und
TA: I- whoah.
TA: WHAT
Alistair : what?
TA: So it's the same as a-
TA: ohhhhhhhh
Alistair : a2 a what?
TA: well,
Alistair : ...?
TA: Ah, you have both female and male genetalia? I mean, apart from the chest thing, having genetalia like trolls sounds- well, it sounds great.
TA: ((wOW MAN
TA: ((GRATZ EVAN
TA: ((TOTAL PRO
Alistair : yeah i gue22 i d9n't ;ike being 29 2en2itive th9ugh
Alistair : ((much great
Alistair : ((very pr9
TA: ((speciesswap HAH great AU idea for another time.
Alistair : ((fuck yeah'
TA: Ahah- hahah *Whoah look at that very very blushy face*
Alistair : y9u've turned red
TA: *He almost instantly covers his face with his hands. But hey, through his hands you can still see a smile* SHIT
Alistair : y9u turn red a;9t i2 that a g99d thing?
TA: no...
TA: I mean, I guess I'm- I'm ah, how do you put this blushing?
TA: ((hAH
TA: ((LOWBLOOD
Alistair : i kn9w what it i2 dude]
Alistair : *he ;aughed a bit*
TA: *Gosh, he might have just mad a fool out of himself* Yeah but- I kinda just admitted to it?
Alistair : *he p9ked the hand2* unc9ver i wanna 2ee y9u're face
TA: *With jerky moves he uncovers his face* uh
Alistair : *he chuck;e2* y9u ;99k ;ike a t9mat9
TA: *WELL THERE HE GOES AGAIN, face burried into his hands, unwilling to look up to the other*
Alistair : i2 that what i ;99ked ;ike?*he gent;y head butted the 9ther* it2 n9t a bad thing c9me 9n d9nt hide
TA: *He just quietly shook his head*
TA: *or hands*
Alistair : *he ;ayed hi2 head 9n the 9ther2* im n9t m9ving ti;; y9u unc9ver again.
TA: *He shook his head again* what do you want
Alistair : ;99k up again.
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TA: *He shifts a little and- well, I guess Alistair's head wasn't helping much, but he uncovered his face again* eh..
Alistair : *he t99k hi2 head 9ff 9f the 9ther*
TA: haha- well, now I'm here. My face red as a tomato!
Alistair : im 29rry, i 2h9u;dn't have 2aid that.
TA: No, it's all good
Alistair : *pap*
TA: *He burries his nose imbetween his hands again*
Alistair : *pap pap*
TA: you suck
TA: ((oN THIS PEEN
TA: ((BLESS YOU EVAN YOU ARE THE DEVIL HIMSELF
Alistair : y9u 2uck.
TA: *He quickly uncovers his face to give Alistair a firm nudge on his side* you suck even more.
Alistair : *he had been pearched 9n the edge 9f the c9uch 29 thi2 made him fa;; 9ff* w9ah! n9 y9u 2uck*he 2ay2 fr9m the f;99r*
TA: *He looked away from the Alistair* right.
Alistair : *he ju2t kinda 2tay2 9n the f;99r* ... i ment t9 fa;; by the way i t9ta;;y knew it w9u;d happen...yeah..
TA: *A small snort manages to leave Evan*
Alistair : *he 2cramb;e2 int9 a different p92iti9n* draw me ;ike 9ne 9f y9u're fema;e'2 9f the french nati9na;ity.
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TA: *WHOAH MASSIVE SNORT*
Alistair : heheheh
TA: ((I CANT GET OVE THE "DRAW ME LIKE ONE OF YOUR FEMALES OF THE FRENCH NATIONALITY"
Alistair : (( i 2eri9u2;y ju2t th9ught 9f that
TA: ((bless your soul
Alistair : ((im awe29me
TA: *Evan looks out the window- whoah it was already dark*
TA: Wait should you go home or will you spend the night here?
Alistair : ah 2hit i2 it a;ready dark? i2 it 9kay if i 2tay here* he t9ta;;y wa2n't 2aying that cau2e evan2 h9t n9pe!*
TA: *He arched his eyebrows, surprised* Yeah sure! You could take my bed if you want I could take the sofa.
TA: ((i JUST WANT THEM TO TOUCH BUTTS AND GET ALL BLUSHY THATS ALL I WANT
Alistair : i cant make y9u d9 that that2 ju2t rude. ((i cant figure 9ut h9w t9 d9 it ehhhhhh))
TA: ((I mean, I could totally make evan make the first move or something.
TA: I- nono, really, I insist.
Alistair : ((that w9u;d pr9b;ey be be2t))*he 2t99d up and 2tretched* i';; take the 29fa 2eri9u2;y
TA: *He lays his arms and legs all over the sofa, that's it. He's claimed it. No one can say so otherwise* Mine.
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Alistair : fine i';; 2;eep in y9u're bed then.*he huffed* which way i2 it?
TA: Ah- I'll show you the way *He rolled off the couch then stood up, brushing the wrinkles and folds out of his shirt*
Alistair : hah!*he d9ve 9nt9 the c9uch* g9t ya
TA: A- FUCK
Alistair : vict9ry f9r me!
TA: *He climbs onto the couch, probably trapping Alistair's legs in between his thighs- his hands pinned to either side of Alistair's head. (DOES IT MAKE SENSE SHIT I CANT THINK OF WHAT TO SAY** I already claimed the couch.
Alistair : *9h 2hit, b;u2h centra;* w-we;; i a;ready here.
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TA: (( THAT WAS A LONG RECONNECT
TA: ((BUT HERE IS MOBILE
Alistair : ((he;;9 again
TA: ((sorry, wifi isn't the best right now
Alistair : ((bruh it2 fine i've ju2t been watching Ty;er Oak;y
TA: ((yessss
TA: ((queen
Alistair : ((9ak;ey** he2 a b922 a22 bitch
TA: ((wait wait let me try to reconnect with my laptop
Alistair : ((9kie d9ke
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TA: ((I HAd to restart my laptop and I believe it's not worth it.
TA: ((but it was
Alistair : ((t9ta;;y w9rth it
TA: ((anywAYS WHERE WERE THEY
TA: ((RIGHT
Alistair : ((ya2
TA: *Evan placed a hand on Alistar's chest, then leaned down to whisper something into his ear* but I was the first to claim it as mine
Alistair : *wheeze* b-but i 2t9;e it.
TA: ((STRAIGHT TO THE KINK
TA: ((ALSO SORRY FAST TYPING *aLISTAIR
Alistair : ((h9;y fuck ive g9t ty;er 9ak;ey2 v9ice in the back gr9und and hi2 v9ice g9t rea;;y deep when i read that
TA: ((Oh my gOD
Alistair : ((im dyingggg
TA: ((soBBING
Alistair : ((ahhhhh
TA: I get the right to claim what is mine
Alistair : *9h dear ;9rd* but im a;ready here 29 it2 n9t y9ur'2 anym9re
TA: ((sHIT ARE YOU READY FOR THIS
TA: ((ARE YOU READY
TA: ((ARE YOU READ
Alistair : ((i am READY
Alistair : ((PREPARED
TA: then what if I make you mine
TA: ((SCREECHING
TA: ((PARTYING
TA: ((CELEBR8ING
Alistair : *9h dear ;9rdddd
Alistair : c9me c;aim me then~
TA: *His eyelids are lowered and his eyes are goddamn lustful as ever. He leans down and just kisses him. Nice*
Alistair : *chirp, he ki22ed back making 2ure t9 watch hi2 fang2*
TA: *I mean, I think Evan would enjoy lip biting- only when he's HORNY though*
TA: ((hAH
TA: ((spoILER USED CORRECTLY
Alistair : *2harp a22 fang2*
TA: *YEAH- or maybe like- not biting, just gently GRAZING*
Alistair : *i 2ha;; u2e that t9 my advantage*
TA: *NCIENICE*
TA: ((shit that looks like a failed attempt at trying to spell science
Alistair : ((the be2t kind 9f 2cince
Alistair : ((2cienc
Alistair : ((2cience***
TA: ((rELATABLE
Alistair : ((i 2uck at 2pe;;ing
TA: *His hand rubbed against his chest and shoulder, nice- VERY NICE BROAD SHOULDERS*
TA: ((nono it's all good, don't worry.
Alistair : *he purred* ((thankie2))
TA: *He gently bit on Alistair's bottom lip, his hand finding its way to his fins, his index finger carefully tracing it. The cheeky bastard manages to smile into the kiss- damn*
Alistair : m-mhm!~*hi2 m9uth 9pened up when he t9uched the fin*
TA: *hAH HE'S NOT ACCPETING IT- Evan pulls away from the kiss, a dumb grin plastered onto his face. His other hand not leaving his fin* You look pathetic.
Alistair : 2-2t9p t9u-t9uching it!*he whined ;9w;y*
TA: Fine. *His hand left his fin, but rather moved onto his horns*
Alistair : *he purred ;9ud;y*
Alistair : ((brb
TA: ((take your time.
TA: *He pulled away from him, taking on his original position* Lets take this somewherer else.
Alistair : 9-9kay*hi2 fin2 f;uttered a bit* ((29rry i had t9 d9 a thing))
TA: ((aaa it's all chill
TA: *He climbed off Alistair and his couch, then began to slowly make his way to his bedroom. Nice birds. Nice nice. The best.*
Alistair : *9h 2hit dat a22, he f9;;9wed him 2;9w;y 2ti;; purring a bit*
TA: *wow what is thIS HE'S SUDDENLY SHIRTLESS how IS HE SO Fas T WITH THESE THINGS. Scarf is off too.*
TA: *HE'S ACTUALLY VERY LANKY AND SKINNY*
Alistair : *he 2tarted fidd;ing with the edge 9f hi2 2hirt bef9re taking it 9ff, and h9;y 2hit ;99k at the2e mu2c;e2 fuck yeah*
TA: *Shit- SHI t Ho T DADS*
TA: *THAT HO T Dad is gREAT*
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Alistair : *dad j9ke2*
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TA: *He stands on his tiptoes, hardly reaching his mouth to be able to kiss him, so just- well, kisses his neck instead, collarbone, maybe*
Alistair : mhm~*he hum2 in appr9va; and ;ean2 d9wn a bit*
TA: *He wraps his hands around his neck, then presses his lips to his. They both fall back onto the bed, well, Evan is on the bed, Alistair? I doubt it, he's reallY TALL. He smiles, kissing Alistair again- deeply*
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Alistair : *he u2e2 hi2 hand2 t9 keep him2e;f up* ;99k wh92 under me~*he chuck;e2 a bit*
TA: *He groaned, the smile never escaping his sTUPID FACE* I'm just letting you be in charge for a while.
Alistair : mhm~ whatever y9u 2ay t9mat9 b9y~
TA: ((Oh mY GOD
TA: ((I CAN'T
Alistair : ((t9mat9 t9mat9 t9mat9
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TA: *That just- totally knocks him back- kinda hits him hard* Wow you're rude as FUCK.
Alistair : *he p9uted* w9u;d it make y9u fee; better if i 2aid y9ur a cute t9mat9.
TA: *He is taken by surprised, he looks about* Yeah, I'll concider it.
TA: ((hOW TO AROUSE THE HANDSOME MAN OF THE SEA
Alistair : y9u are the cute2t t9mat9
Alistair : ((be a t9mat9 XD
TA: *He smiled at the... semi-complement and climbed further onto the bed until finally propping up his elbow on a HUGE PILE OF PILLOWS*
Alistair : *that2 a ;9t 9f fucking pi;;9w2, he f9;;9w2 the 9ther2 ;ead*
TA: ((any kinks?
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Alistair : ((everytime i 2ay mine 29me9ne 2ay2 im fucked up 29 i'd rather n9t, d9 y9u have any?
TA: ((no WAIT WHAT KINKS
TA: ((SERIOUSLy I WON't judge
TA: ((UNLESS ITS LIKE- CANNIBALISM
TA: ((IS IT CANNIBALISM
Alistair : (( i kinda g9t a thing f9r 2panking, dude fuck n9 i d9nt d9 anything g9re 2eri9u2;y fuck that 2hit
Alistair : ((fuck g9re
TA: ((nice
TA: ((NICE also about the spanking
TA: (( I Dont GET WHY PEOPLE SAY THAT'S FUCKED UP
Alistair : ((i d9nt even kn9w
Alistair : ((it'2 2eri9u2;y n9t that bad
TA: ((ITS ACTUALLY REALLY DAMN NICE AND CUTE
TA: ((Like- In my opinion it is
Alistair : ((thank y9u y9u are an ange;
TA: ((and gore isnt that bad actually
Alistair : ((ive had 29me9ne tear my 9c'2 eye 9ut then fuck the 29cket
TA: ((yEAH OKAY THATS JUST KINDA GROSS
TA: ((but sounds interesting
Alistair : ((that2 why i d9nt ;ike it, a;29 29me9ne ate karkat2 kidney2 tw9
TA: ((that actually sounds appealing?????????????
TA: ((lIKE I KNOW IM MESSED UP BUT GORE IS NICE- sometimes
Alistair : ((i dunn9 i d9nt under2tand it
Alistair : ((i d9nt mind it a2 ;9ng a2 it2 n9t bad bad 2tuff
TA: ((ah- okay
Alistair : ((y9u wanna 2tart 9r d9 i?
TA: ((about the spanking- I DONT KNOW ABOUT HAND-SLAPS IM GOOD WITH LEATHER THINGS BUT
TA: ((I honestly don't know how to spank people bUT I TRY
TA: ((I MEAN- I DONT KNOW HOW TO MAKE MY CHARACTERS SPANK OTHERS bUT ITS CUTE
Alistair : ((y9u d9n't have t9 man p;u2 my character ha2 a be;t, wait he 2ti;; ha2 hi2 pant2 n right?
TA: ((yeye
TA: ((gr8 pants
Alistair : ((pirate pant2
TA: ((amazing pants
Alistair : ((yeeee
TA: ((sHIT
TA: ((WAIT
TA: ((IMAGINE A DADDY KINK
TA: ((i really dont know what to feel about it
Alistair : ((i d9nt kn9w either
TA: ((right okay
Alistair : ((y9ur ch9ice
TA: ((I'm just going to stick to the safe wall here
Alistair : ((aight mate
TA: *He begins rubbing his horns again. Maybe touches the fin with his other hand- who knows, he just can't keep his hands off Alistair, alright*
Alistair : *he purr2 again pu2hing int9 the t9uch*
TA: ((wait no who's top
TA: ((lost
Alistair : ((2hit i dunn9
TA: ((AHHHHHH crap
Alistair : ((fuckkk
TA: ((Okay could Evan bottom for a while?
Alistair : ((yeah 2ure i g9t thi2
TA: ((YOU GOT THIS
Alistair : ((2hit i may have t9 g9 299n it2 ;ate 9ver here, d9 y9u have tumb;r
TA: ((yeyeah I do but I don't use it much.
TA: ((doobymcgurk
Alistair : ((wait i a;ready f9;;9wed y9u
TA: ((I also think you can't skype? So its impossible for me to give you my skype???
Alistair : ((i d9n't have 9ne and i cant make 9ne i have t9 g9 n9w it2 five in the m9rning
Alistair : ((g'night
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Text
17 Paragraphs About February 17
1
On the day I left for my first ever vacation alone, my boyfriend drove me to the bus station in the silver Honda Accord we shared, and let me out at a curb full of departing lovebirds. “Bye,” he said, kissing me quickly on the lips. “Have fun.” After almost five years, he still didn’t really have a great supply of sweet nothings within him. Every Valentine’s Day yielded the same array of gifts: one dozen supermarket roses, a heart-shaped box of the second-least expensive chocolates, and a greeting card signed with only his name and the year.
2
We met two weeks before my twenty-first birthday. He was a friend of a friend of a friend, and I already had a boyfriend—a bad one named T-Money, but boyfriend nonetheless. Something about this new guy’s face seemed so genuinely attractive, so honest, so benevolent. We chatted, I invited him to my upcoming party, and he came. Sitting on my carpeted apartment floor, he lit the blunt he’d brought with him, hit it and passed it to me. I took a deep inhale, let some smoke drift back into my nose, and exhaled in his direction, moving in and kissing him. His lips felt perfect, and the move was so smooth that I could hardly believe it’d happened. Seconds later, T-Money entered the party, and I was forced to avoid the one person I wanted to be around for the remainder of the night. The next day, I texted him that I enjoyed our kiss a lot. “It was straight,” he replied in the most politely neutral way. We texted a bit more, exchanging biographical facts and anecdotes. It was clear that he was a genuinely nice guy. We hung out, talked and smoked a couple times before the first Valentine’s Day that I received my ritualistic grocery store goodies. On that night, I called my then-boyfriend to let him know he should remove the rest of his belongings from my place. I had found a great, good-natured guy, one that resisted sleeping with me for several nights because he was interested in getting to know me first. We made it official on February 17.
3
The next five years didn’t happen on purpose. We glazed over mammoth issues and dug ourselves into a cozy, codependent bind. We moved in together a few months before our two-year anniversary, and it was a constant blend of exciting and frustrating. I loved being able to sleep in bed with him every night, a luxury we’d lost when I moved back to my parents’ house for a few months. He didn’t like to talk, though, at least not about intangible things, like emotions. I strained my back trying to push some things onto the back burner. I wasn’t unhappy, because despite any shortcomings he was always a loyal and dependable partner. He was selfless, the older brother of two who had long been accustomed to taking the broken cookie in the 3-pack. If there was something I wanted, he would give it to me. He was a hard worker and an honest man. If there was something I wanted that he couldn’t give, like support when I cried, or feedback about my writing, or answers to my issues with our relationship, he would shut down. I didn’t want to lose him but my vision of our future steadily grew bleaker. I could no longer imagine living with him from present day until infinity, with plates of White Castle burgers teetering precariously atop leaning piles of unfolded laundry. I couldn’t imagine forever sobbing next to someone silently consumed in a game of FIFA. But the good times made the bad times worth it, and more often than not he felt like a good buddy rather than a lover.
4
I never wanted to love another person until I met another person I loved. He made songs, some of which a friend randomly played for me in the car one day. It was immediately my favorite music. The lyrics were poignant and aggressive and relatable, the songs were songs I wished I had written. I wondered who he was, marveled at the fascinating spectrum of human emotions that permeate art and music, and downloaded it for myself when I got home. I found and followed him on Twitter. He was Nigerian, lived in Chicago, and looked nothing like I’d imagined. I tweeted him about one of his songs, and he replied to let me know he appreciated the support. I bought a shirt from him, a tank top not worth the 30 dollars I didn’t really have, and in the package he sent a letter thanking me and praising me as a “dope individual.” We started to text each other a month or two later, and things slid from mostly professional to cool and casual to sometimes deep and personal. Things never reached the point of flirtatious beyond a few scattered side-smirk emojis. One day as we were texting, I asked if he had a girlfriend, and he told me he didn’t. He had been with one girl for three years, part of which was long distance, and had recently broken up with her only to become absolute strangers. He asked if I had a boyfriend. I told him I did, and that we lived together.
5
Last February 17, he moved from Chicago to Los Angeles to further pursue his music career. He tweeted the words “February Seventeenth” and I favorited it, thinking about how special the date was to my now four-year-long relationship, which was at least four times longer than any of my previous relationships. I had no idea then what the meaning of the date was to him.
6
One night, at 5 a.m., he texted me “Wake up.” One minute later, “Never mind.” It was 2 a.m. in his time zone, and he was drinking. When I woke up, I texted back that he was dumb. We didn’t talk anymore about it, but I felt I had a good idea of what it meant. In August, I had been watching a shitload of The Amazing Race on Netflix and planned a solo four-city trip to places where I knew someone and would have a place to stay. Los Angeles would be my second stop, after Atlanta and before Seattle and New York. I’d been to L.A. before, but it was definitely the location I was most excited to visit, because of who was there. When I inquired about his living arrangements, and if they would allow for me to stay a few days, he said “Of course.” The truth was that I didn’t have a backup plan if he’d said no. But he’d said “Of course”—not just “yes,” but “of course.” I tried to suppress butterflies and remain aloof. He was just a friend, attentive and affectionate safely within the limits of our virtual friendship. We wouldn’t cross that line.
7
We FaceTimed once before the trip, and I saw how his face and voice corresponded in real time. I’d heard him in music and seen him in pictures, but this solidified him as a real person, one that I would see in less than a week. I didn’t think I was necessarily attracted to him, either, which made me more comfortable about the idea of staying with him. A few days later, he sent me a picture of him in Nigerian clothes, for his parents’ anniversary celebration in Chicago. Something about his all-brick colored garb set my heart aflutter. I broke the fourth wall with an unprecedented heart-eye emoji. “Why are you so cute?” I said. “No Dana Jean, you’re the cute one,” he sent back. I listened to his songs on repeat for the entire flight from Atlanta to Los Angeles. They are all still in the "Top 25 Most Played" playlist on my iPhone.
8
Now begin the memories that you can’t fully appreciate until they are done happening. The way he got out of his car and took my bag and hugged me so tight that my back cracked a little. The way he immediately drove us to the art museum I’d told him was always closed every other time I’d visited L.A., which was twice before, both times with my boyfriend. The way he took tourist-like pictures of me without making me feel awkward, like a tourist. The way we went back to his apartment, and smoked the weed that he’d bought for me to roll, since he didn’t know how. He wanted me to teach him, but never really intended on learning—he was content to watch me do it for him. The way we went to the mountain and walked along the trails he told me he runs on every day. The scenery as the sun set over the city, with us towering above and laughing at each other’s jokes. The way things felt so natural, so in tune with how I knew he would be. His hand accidentally rubbed against my butt as we walked, and I convinced myself that he thought nothing of it, and so I shouldn’t, either. That was day one.
9
When I left, I knew I loved him. There was a chemistry that was undeniable, so blatantly all-important that to ignore it would be criminal. When I left L.A. and arrived in Seattle, I spent the whole day surveying gorgeous scenery, taking pictures to send to him, wishing he were there with me but thankful to at least share the same time zone despite our distance. At the end of my first Seattle night, I was exhausted and stoned off all kinds of weed goodies. I laid in my friend’s roommate’s plush bed, and called him. I said I missed him already, and he replied the same. We talked for an hour, and it felt like we were together, face to face on his futon again.
10
My boyfriend didn’t say much during my trip, even when I texted him about the food I ate or fun things I saw. I felt stupid. I was fishing for casual communication with the person I am supposed to be closest with, all the while building a much easier and more compelling bond with another man. From Seattle I flew to New York, where I blindly felt my way through the Subway system and met up with my roommate, who happened to be there for the weekend. It was 8 a.m., and we sat on the rooftop of our friend’s apartment building in Brooklyn, getting high. I was exhausted from my trip, and as I told my roommate about everything that had happened, I started crying and couldn’t stop. When I got home, I didn’t feel like I was home.
11
I went back to L.A. in October for two more days, and as soon as I got home, my boyfriend gave me an engagement ring. I cried and cried and cried. Everything felt surreal, like a situation I was watching and not living. I wanted to write about it but couldn’t. I wanted to talk about it but couldn’t. I wanted to fly back to L.A. and stick my head in the sand and hide, but I couldn’t.
12
He returned the ring after I expressed my apprehension about things. He asked me if this was because I’d met someone else. I was convinced that it was not, that it was instead because I’ve never allowed myself time to be alone, and now the impending danger of never being alone was blinging in my face, blinding me with its gravity. I would never have time to explore, to feel different things, to connect with different people. Of course, I thought about the connection I had in California, but tried my best to demote it to a fact of life instead of an earth-shattering love affair. All the while, everything I couldn’t say to my boyfriend, I said to the other half of my earth-shattering love affair. He knew all of my fears and frustrations and fuck-ups. My phone began to move slower because our text thread was the digital weight equivalent of ten phone books. My camera roll was laden with pictures he sent me. He made me feel like there was someone out there who could accept and love me despite knowing all my flaws, because I was also a bevy of positive adjectives. That someone was him, and I loved him for that, but the way he loved me was never quite the same. He always told me he didn’t have time for a girlfriend, but what I heard was that he didn’t need one because I was close enough to it.
13
I went to California again in February. This time, I went with two friends and booked a place for us to stay. This time, I stayed for five days instead of two. This time, instead of laying on his futon and traipsing around the city, I got drunk with my girlfriends and infused him into our group dinners and nighttime patio smoke sessions and wholesome games of Charades. We had a lot of fun, and my friends loved him—but things felt different. We were only pseudo-romantic, still lovers but lazily. I had no time to gaze at him or get lost in high conversations like we used to, because it was 4 a.m. and we both had plans for the day. I saw as he scrolled through his texts that his last message was “I love you too.” I don’t know if it was sent or received, but the sender-or-recipient was an artist girl he had been talking to and hiding me from since my first trip in August. She wasn’t his girlfriend, and neither was I—something he never neglected to remind me of when we’d argue. The only difference was that he acknowledged their relationship and her general existence with me, and denied being more than a random Internet friend with me to her. Her artwork was everywhere in his apartment on Tuesday. Everything was gone on Wednesday. I saw the love text on Thursday, and said my goodbyes on Friday.
14
I knew that things with the guy in L.A. weren’t exactly what I would have liked them to be, or what they might have the potential to be with different timing and details, but I also knew that I couldn’t stay in my current situation at home. February 17 was quickly on the way to mark our fifth year together. I didn’t know what to do, so I did nothing.
15
Because I am a writer, I have a tendency to write about everything, especially about that which pertains to or happens to me. There are pages and pages of Word documents on my computer that tell the same story a million different ways. To read my writing is to know me. In five years, my boyfriend never took interest in a single thing I wrote. I graduated with a Journalism degree two years after we started dating, and I never did a thing with it. I continued to write for myself, for writing’s sake, for catharsis, for the few people that religiously read my work. I wished I could be in a relationship with someone who really wanted to know about me, who would greedily consume every word I write. I finally decided that it might be worth it to make that sacrifice, to give up on the idea of a whirlwind creative passionate romance that would propel me leaps and bounds as a human and a lover and a writer. By that time, it was too late. My boyfriend picked the perfect moment to finally read some of my work, and it was about my whirlwind creative passionate romance in Los Angeles. He asked me questions and I lied. He kept asking questions that he already knew the answers to, and so finally I told him the truth.
16
Naturally, Valentine’s Day was much different than what I’d grown used to. No Dove chocolates, no red roses, no card signed “2015.” I saw cards from previous years ripped to pieces. It was over. I had no choice but to roll me a blunt with my list of regrets. He moved out on February 17. He took the T.V., and of course, the “cubby cabeza,” which for some reason was our word for “remote control.” I was alone, T.V.-less, in our room, now my room and 205 dollars more expensive. I hung a tapestry, put up ethereal string lights and laid down a red and white floral carpet. I tried to make the room feel like my own, the bed feel like my own, because now it is my own. Everything is my own, my thoughts are my own, my writing is my own, my life is my own.
17
Everyone and everything feels so far from me. I feel like I am floating through space, untethered. “Space is where you find you,” my friend told me today. I used to call the futon in California the spaceship. Now I really have nothing but space.
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Happy new year 🎉🔔✂😔 by by rat tail! #rattail #haircut #longasfuck #newyears @jaygetshighonlife @mattleveille @cassidyrachael @leanmean900 @katherinemcdo @ponyup_ @t_mll @big_germk20 @honda_man_93 @suprachad
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