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smoshyourheadin · 29 days

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Sunshine and Soda Cans

Part 1 - Fizzes

you’d joined smosh in summer last year, just after anthony’s return. you’d watched smosh with your brother as a kid, so getting this editing job was a dream come true. although you hadn't watched their stuff in years, you quickly adapted to the quick thinking environment.

you got the job from your roommate angela, who was a cast member. you guys are super close, so when she mentioned that they had an editing vacancy, you jumped at the opportunity to leave your job at a marketing company to go work woth her. living with angela proved useful, because after your first day, you asked her about spencer, and oh did she have stuff to tell you.

“hey hey, whats the deal with the uh, spencer guy at work?” you said to her at dinner.

“(Y/N) ITS THE FIRST DAY AND YOU ALREADY HAVE THE HOTS FOR SPENCER?? I MEAN I’D UNDERSTAND IF IT WAS SOMEONE LIKE-” she began shouting, laughing at your face as you blushed

“jelly i- please, just- okay yeah, he’s cute but i don't want to make a move, he’s basically my boss!”

“this is also true. okay so…” she begins to ramble to this spencer guy you, as you eat your spaghetti. he’s so totally your type, but would you make a move? you can't decide.

the days passed, and soon enough you’d been at smosh for a month now. angela, being angela, had one day let slip to amanda of your small crush on spencer

“(y/n)!! get your butt over here!” she beamed at you, so you obliged, because who wouldn't listen to amanda? she's 6 feet of pure love, you listen to everything she says

“a little birdie, who cant keep her mouth shut after two glasses of wine, told me that you like spencer?” she looks at you, a certain glint in her eye

“okay, maybe, JUST maybe, i have a teeny, tiny crush on him. BUT i don't think im going to make a move.” you looked into her eyes, feeling dejected, because you felt he would never like you back.

the events that ensued, you couldn't even keep up with. every day on set, amanda would rake you into a conversation she was having with spencer, or angela would ask you to go to his desk give him something off her. you weren't nescaserily complaining, but it was less than ideal, because you became a stuttering mess around him.

“hey spence, um- angela wanted me to give you this, i mean i dont know why she didnt bring it herself, its kind of lazy, she is, i mean- she isnt but she has me running around for her, but thats friendship right? i mean i’d make her do that, but not if-”

he gazes up into your eyes and gently places a hand on your arm, sending small jolts through your body.

“dude, it’s just me, relax!” he smiles at you, as you give him the mt dew kickstart angela sent you over to give him.

“tell angela thanks by the way!” he said, as you walked over to angela, who was trying not to break out into a big smirk

“oh spencer! angela is making me do things for her! oh woe is me! hold me incase i fall!” she placed the back of her palm to her forehead, dramatically falling into amanda’s arms

“hey! thats not what i sounded like! right? i didn't. right.” you said, becoming increasingly concerned if it was that obvious. courtney, erin d, and arasha walked over to you guys

“hey dudes,” courtney began “whats up with you guys?”

“oh, i bet theyre taking about how (y/n) is totally into spencer” arasha said, stifling a giggle.

you stood with your mouth slightly agape, gawking at her remark.

“is it really that obvious!?” you whined, slumping into a chair.

“i mean,” erin looked at you, as you tried folding into the air to disappear, “we’re the only ones who’ve noticed so far, but i don't think the boys have caught on! i think you're good”

“maybe minus josh,” courtney added, “i was sat with him and he asked me about why (y/n) was ‘oogling at spencer’ on that board af video. but he wont tell, he’s too nice”

a few days pass, and your crush on spencer had become slightly bigger. taking advantage of this, courtney decided to make you, angela, and spencer (the ‘golden trio’ as the fans called you) do an episode of who meme'd it.

“hello and welcome everyone to a brand spankin’ new episode of who memed it!” shayne began, earning a small round of applause from the crew.

“today, we have everyone’s favourite roommates and spencer!”

you were leant on angela’s shoulder, but perked up to smile at the camera

“hi guys!” angela grins at the camera, waving aggressively

“dude!” spencer yelled at shayne “why cant i be the favourite roommate!” he looked dejected

“spencer, we lived together and i have never slept worse, the only thing in our apartment was mt dew and granola bars!!”

“okay, you got me”

you look over at him and giggle, feeling your cheeks begin to warm up

as the rounds go on, angela is on 5 points, you’re on 4, and spencer is on 8.

“okay, next meme!” shayne boasts

the next thing on screen made everyone cackle.

immediately, shayne starts giggling, and puts his fists against the wall, not being able to look at any of you. angela is crying with laughter, and even spencer is giggling. you just stare into the camera in shock.

through tears, shayne manages “oh my- all- alright who memed it, was it tommy, josh, was it courtney, or was it erin, our lovely producer”

you each place your guesses, and its revealed to be a secret shayne meme. you swear you could burn holes through him.

after wrap, you went off with angela giggling about some of the things, your mind still racing from being so close to spencer. for so long. it was cringey, yes, but you felt so exited when you were around him, you couldn't help it!

but little did anyone know, spencer was just as infatuated with you, and he was waiting for the day be mustered up the courage to ask you out

#smosh #spencer agnew #spencer agnew x reader #courtney miller #amanda lehan canto #arasha lalani #angela giarratana #shayne topp #smoshyourheadin

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f0linasahl0 · 1 month

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more things about the livestream experience before i go completely insane.

(warning: this is going to be a long one)

1: why is [bishop] lisden's favorite song mulberry street and why is [bishop] sacarver's favorite (if i remember) the outside or stressed out....i just want to throw that out there

2: i absolutely adore the piano spread whatever thing tyler does before he goes and raps to migrane. i dont know what its called but when he runs his hand across the piano, it was good. how did he make it sound so good and musical...

3: why is the shy away livestream version the only livestream version that is on their official "the story" playlist??? i keep thinking about that (https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3roRV3JHZzaU_kQ4-7uv-ahPbFabFmRW)

4: also thinking about how they cut off holding onto you before the outro. basically all there was of holding onto you was the "entertain my faith" part...thinking about the lore THERE. how a "good day dema" ad cut off the ending as well then they talk about how happy they are !! then how it goes to mulberry street after dan LISDEN says its his favorite then how it goes so blurry BEFORE THE AD??? ----"entertain my faith" sounds something like he..wants more from the religion but they cut him off from continuing the rest of holding onto you..like he got in trouble or something? i dont know man

5: "dema is bringing you this music collection that is vibrant with saturation"... "dema wants you to enjoy this collection"..."i just felt trapped before having this collection" ... "contentment"...."now that youve heard some of this collection you must be just like us, completely saturated"..."sometimes i close my eyes to try to escape...you know you cant escape sally...yes i know!" PROPAGANDA

6: why is he holding and grabbing his head so much. past the literal deadpan ass stare hes got through the majority if not all of the experience (like even while doing his little dances you'd think he'd be smiling during...), why does he grip his head so often-- i talked about this before but like what are they doing to him man he like grips his head in almost pain so much

7: also thinking about what the lore implications of jenna and debby being in this...because im pretty sure its shown jenna in levitate is a bandito i only assume debby was one too. why are they there?? were they caught too? or did dema make clones of them to use against josh and tyler?

8: "i cant wait to see you again"

9: ”in a world where this is as good as it gets…we miss you. we really do.”

10: also can we discuss the "CONTROLLED by" dma org and good day dema??? this photo is blurry as hell but CONTROLLED BY! not PRODUCTION OF! specific word choice..also dma org...dmaorg.info...why are clancy's letters posted on a website thats directly correlated with dema...letters from his time inside as well as time outside...can we like talk about that--like other than the obvious showcase that they have his letters and are using them to lie to the people, why are they going through dmaorg?? if clancy isnt directly with dema why are they--why are they going through there???

11: the whole cutscene before lane boy "there was a wonderful structure to the city that put my cares to rest and the responsibilities of the day seemed to be accomplished with minimal effort. once a task was taught and understood, our obligations timely, and it felt secure knowing tomorrows duties would be accomplished with the same efficiency. we all worked to represent our bishop with honor knew that each inhabitant of our region had a like-minded dedication to consistency....why do i kneel to these concepts? tempted by control, control by temptation. stay low, they say. stay low," then the direct contradiction of the redecorate rap he inserts, “with the bells and the whistles scaled back like an isolated track, and he feels trapped when he's not inebriated fair to say he's fairly sedated most days of the week. he might have made it if he lived on a different street. i repeat, scaled back and isolated he says he likes an open schedule but he mostly hates it if you're running to his room, take a breath before you break-in put your ear up to the door, tell me can you hear him saying?” using clancy's letters to show praise to dema then clancy (tyler) directly contradicting being like "no i hold zero praise for this city" and saying how hes isolated and sedated when hes not preforming--how he ALMOST made it out. how if he lived A LITTLE closer to the walls he wouldnt be there right now-

12: the way the old songs are "SCALED BACK AND ISOLATED" ???? A SCALED BACK AND ISOLATED TRACK????

13: the way ned is missing in chlorine when he was such a big part of chlorine

14: AGAIN this shy away version. one-why is it so important to the story, two-the 9 chairs for 9 bishops around the table, three-i fucking love the guitarist by josh i love his energy, four-THE WAY HE BREAKS A GLASS WHEN TALKING ABOUT BREAKING THE CYCLE IN HALF???, THE SCREAM !!!! so many things

[so many things you guys]

15: the fucking bishop ass dancers to stressed out....can we discuss that too. ALSO HOW THEY DRAG HIM TO THE NEXT STAGE FOR STRESSED OUT?

16: "but remember you should- *cut off*" YOU SHOULD WHAT SALLY SACARVER????

17: also firstly, how beautiful the ukulele part was...it was so gorgeous, also the transition was amazing. though past that, can we talk about how fucking sad he looked on that little boat with his uke? was that a mock to his escape attempts? to him singing to an empty sky in trench? singing to the banditos as they boat someplace safer? like...

18: THE MOCKING OF THE BANDITOS WITH THE FUCKING JUMPSUIT/HEAVYDIRTYSOULD PART?? why would dema do that? why would the bishops actively make josh and tyler look like the banditos if it wasn't just a mock? they dont like the banditos i thought why would they have them dressed up like that? like torchbearer bringing the torch to the stage and the look josh has on his face-then tyler also being in a bandito outfit. like--it has to be mocking his attempts. mocking the banditos or SOMETHING

19: heathens being in the livestream makes me think a little too but i dont know. "all my friends are heathens take it slow, wait for them to ask you who you know. please dont make any sudden moves you dont know half of the abuse."

20: also first, what was that alarm that was sounded before never take it? what happened there? second, the lore people have posted about never take it and how it was about the bishops? the way it was played while the alarm was going off and it was almost messier filming...

21: HIM ENDING THE LIVESTREAM WITH "nobody's coming for me" and his deadpan look (sobbing)

22: again, bringing up sally sacarver and dan lisden. sacarver and lisden being bishop's names and hosting this livestream. then showing directly how the bodies they are controlling are deteriorating as the show goes on. "The rules are that you can only seize or control a dead body, and only for a short while."

23: also just the heavydirtysoul part. starting to think about the: "I tricked Nico into taking me outside the walls. I created a fiery diversion. I escaped." i just keep thinking about that and:

24: "we've come for you, we've got people on the way, no chances, none at all" the way this is direct quotes from dan and sally, who are bishops, and it is also direct lyrics (or close to direct lyrics) from no chances. it just keeps cementing itself on everything ive already thought about

25: past just the livestream experience what is with josh and the bucket hat lol. i love it but like.-

26: "you ask me if its real, i see your shifting eyes, you dig in your heels, i dig my hole to die" also wondering why the "live from the outside" version is here rather than the original.-is it important

27: his little dances are my favorite thing-

28: CAR RADIO...car radio. thats it thats the point. just the car radio part is everything to me--its giving old car radio performances and im living for it. though also old car radio performances? did they put it together like that on purpose?

29: NEVER TAKE IT HAVING A BURNING CAR HOLY SHIT FIREY DIVERSION? LMAO just how close he is to the camera during this too...so many thoughts

30: "...you know you cant escape sally...yes i know!" IS THIS LIVESTREAM SHOWING CLANCY AND HOW HE DIDN'T ESCAPE EITHER?? SHOWING THAT HE HAS BEEN CAUGHT AND IF HE CANT ESCAPE, THE NOTORIOUS CLANCY, THEN YOU CANT EITHER???! SO MANY THOUGHT!!

[sorry for how long this is-]

DID THIS SHOW HOW MANY THOUGHTS I HAVE HERE. im going insane like i keep thinking about the lore implications of this goddamn livestream. i have more points (i will make a essay list whatever for it all so i don't go any crazier) but this is already a lot for one post. just wanted to like...throw this out there. i know some might be a stretch but please just hear me out. just hear me out :,)

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serendipititties · 5 days

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White actors who are actually really good at it: ie., shut the fuck up about timothee chalamet

(This isnt in defence of these actors. This is purely my opinion on their acting skills. This also only based on media that Ive seen. Even if theres a famous actor i should have included, im not putting it in if i havent seen it. Not including any REALLY famous actors like gary oldman or cate blanchett cuz thats redundant)

Walton Goggins (gonna make a whole post about how severely underappreciated he is)

Jodie Comer (I watched almost an hour of Prima Facie on yt and its so incredible. A well deserved Tony for her)

Margot Robbie (a fan favourite, but she convinced so many of yall that barbie was a feminist masterpiece and thats pretty good acting to me)

Josh Charles (idc what people say he was ROBBED of an emmy for the good wife)

Alan Cumming (also only saw him in the good wife but he steals almost every scene)

Carrie Preston (again on TGW, incredible addition and her character is so amazingly done)

Michael Emerson (husband of Carrie Preston i think. He was incredible on Person of Interest and he's also really good in Fallout)

Timothy Olyphant (the contrast between him on justified and him on santa clarita diet is NUTS. Just look it up)

Joelle Carter (also on justified. Love her endlessly. Her character Ava is peak tumblr blorbo material)

Sarah Goldberg (she was sally in Barry and is a personal fave of my dad's)

Eve Hewson (another fave of my dad's. Also she's Bono's kid apparently)

Tom Hiddleston (I like to think timothee chalamet was trying to be him and failed miserably in the talent and charisma section. Saw clips of him on Broadway and while i get why he didnt win but his Tony nom was very well deserved.)

Sebastian stan (pls dont hate me but i watched part of a different man and hes really good in it. Hope he gets better scripts in the future)

J*lianna M*rgulies (i feel weird even putting her on this list in light of her disgusting racist comments, but she brought a very quiet, human rage to her role in the good wife and she deserved those 2 emmys for it IMO)

Christine Baranski (also on the good wife. Loved her on it)

Jonny Lee Miller ( i will scream this till the day i die but hes easily the best sherlock of this century like it isnt even a fight for me)

Bitty Schram (Loved her on monk she was at the heart of that show. It would have never been that good without her as an actress)

David Tennant (yall knew we would be here. GO fans love him like crazy but we have to appreciate how genuinely terrifying he was in Jessica Jones. My mom still refuses to watch GO because of how disturbing he was. )

Michael Sheen (nuff said)

Krysten Ritter (loved her on jessica jones)

Michael C. Hall (he was so so good on Dexter)

Simon Baker (he was like the only really good actor on the mentalist maybe)

Stana Katic (her role im castle was shit but shes pretty good in absentia and i would be open to watching her more)

Thats all I have for now

#wren rambles #celebrity #in hindsight maybe christine and tom were too famous for this list #and sebastian

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gvftea · 1 month

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”Theres an artist who posts Josh art all the time and thats cool and all but its so clear that shes just trying to get his attention. She puts out multiple pieces a week (and is probably tracing them). Like be for real he isnt gonna date you”

Why does every little thing have to turn into “he’s not going to date you.”

#greta van fleet #gvf #josh gvf #sam gvf #jake gvf #josh kiszka #danny wagner #danny gvf #jake kiszka #sam kiskza

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deviantartidentitydisorder · 1 month

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my gender is transsexual. thats why i list it everywhere but even without the term transsexual the term transgender would still just be the most accurate word. which way? who fucking cares. when has that ever mattered. i was a fat ballerina with a hormone disorder that was raised in the middle of fucking nowhere slaughtering farm animals. the only friend that i had that were girls were secretly boys. my first boyfriend at 11 was actually my first "girl best friend" so everyone labeled us as lesbians not knowing that we were both boys. i got called faggot and sissy by the boys i grew up around because i came out socially at 12 and everyone decided that they'd treat me like a cis guy despite me being in ballet. my dad literally never wanted girls. my dad DEFINITELY never wanted a gay son but i was the closest thing to a boy he was getting after the divorce. in highschool i had adults telling me i was throwing away my beautiful feminine nature and that i was such a pretty girl while having other teachers tell me "i cant wait till you get on hormones because i genuinely cant imagine you as a woman. youre already basically a boy." ive had people tell me they forget my dead name isnt joshua and that im not transitioning to be fem nonbinary because they knew me specifically just as some shithead boy named josh. i dont like any pronouns. my gender is "alcoholic disheveled man cross dresssing as an unnerving anime girl with cat ears" but my gender is also "grown adult woman in mens clothing who on all levels is a man except for when you talk to her and she tells you shes a woman" but my gender is also "you were never meant ro draw the curtain back in the first place. i am only an illustrator, not a person, you cannot expect an image of self from me" but its also "im literally a fucking animal" but its also "im a computer and i have no autonomy about how im percieved" but its also

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destinyc1020 · 1 year

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hollywood is all about cycles, timothee is having his moment, hes super popular, hes a star in the industry and he recently had a movie come out,so the articles about timothee being the last hearthrob is just a reaction to the moment. Tom had it early in the year and then it died down and then austin had his moment so I never read to deeply into these articles they are mostly fun and harmless. (By die down I mean they are no longer front and center in the entertainment news cylcle)

Next year the cycle will continue, since we are all fans of zendaya we know for fact mike faist and josh oconnor will get the same treatment its nothing new and its just a sign of the times and our generation.

so all those articles never bug me, the only thing thats annoying is the ways in which fans prevent you from enjoying these actors when they have their moment. Its this constant comparison, constant lets uplift while denigrating everyone else energy thats weird. it sucks to hear people get turned off on certain actors because of their fandom or because they feel obligated to defend their fave. Taylor russell is phenomenal actress like let her have her moment, Im happy her work is being recognized because she is extremely talented so why are people bashing her or zendaya or keke for just existing, minding their business, giving us little glimmers of who they are as people.

People gotta learn its okay to like more than one person, your fav isnt going feel betrayed if you say good things about another actor.

Omg ALL of this!!! 👏🏾💯

You have put so beautifully into words what I myself couldn't express Anon....

This is EXACTLY my frustration sometimes with some of what I see going on at times these days in various fandoms.

It's like you can't even have fun stanning or enjoying someone anymore. 🥴 Some fans take it to the extreme.

You get it!! 👏🏾

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! 👏🏾👏🏾

People gotta learn its okay to like more than one person, your fav isnt going feel betrayed if you say good things about another actor.

Yes!!!

Can I get an amen? 👏🏾🤣

Exactly 💯 Anon. They're not caring if you like a bunch of actors. Shoot.... actors THEMSELVES have a ton of actors that they also look up to and admire! It's not a big deal.

No celebrity or actor is gonna say: "I thought you were only MY fan.... why are you also a fan of someone else?"

And if so... then that actor is cookoo for cocoa puffs rofl 🤣🤣

Well put Anon....👏🏾

I couldn't have said this better myself honestly.

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majaloveschris · 1 year

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If yes, then who forced them to post? If they are so private, why do they need to post stuff about them being in his house?/

But why not? why not posting a photo of you being in a place ? Or maybe they ARE trolling? Thats not the point; what im saying is theres no media, no publicity; these trolling of them being at their houses isnt being marketed

Its only us who knows, not even ALL of the fandom, but a very specific niche, much less the GP unaware of everything; i dont see the PR in her family hanging out at his houses that only a niche part of the fandom can identify

And im sorrrrrry, i swear im not snapping at you or anyone here, i just cant wrap my head around some povs

Two reasons:

Attention. The general public doesn't really care about them. They are together, okay. They have a 16-year age gap, okay. Their relationship isn't something that has never happened before; maybe it was shocking for a month, and for 2 days after they drop something, but another day, another drama. I think she likes the fact that she is being talked about, just like Justin. Maybe it's only happening on a small part of Tumblr and Twitter, but people still talk about her. About whether she was the one who sent the screenshots of the story to blogs or accounts or who edited it, whether it's an old picture or a newer one, or whether she was at the party.

We are the ones who have been selling this "relationship" since the very beginning. We are the ones who were talking about this whole thing when the GP didn't even know who she was. During the time when they didn't even want to come forward as a "couple", but we still talked about them and there were even articles about them maybe being together, we helped sell the narrative. The GP doesn't care whether Alba and Chris were at Jamie's birthday party or whether Chris and Alba were having dinner with Scarlett, Josh, and Robert. We care about it because we do. And also because the fans are divided; some of them think it's real, and some of them think it's not, and each group is trying to find evidence of its own truth. Most people don't care about them being at parties or at each other's houses, but fans do, and it's needed to sell a relationship, to make it organic and natural, just like a normal relationship, especially in their case when it doesn't seem like they want to do pap walks and public appearances. There are a lot of people who, after watching a story like this, may not have started believing they are real, but it definitely crossed their minds, or they went on fully believing it is. Being at your place and spending time with your family are good options for selling a relationship.

It's not about them posting a picture of being somewhere, but the fact they are constantly using older content and pictures and videos that were taken in his house. Like Alba's and Justin's post for Joana's birthday party. They've been friends for years, and do we really think Alba didn't have another picture of her just like the one that was taken in Chris's hot tub? Or that Justin was forced to post the photo and video of Joana, which were taken in Chris's VT house? The pictures that Ana posted also look old. She was never alone when they created any content, so it's not that surprising that her circle was there too.

I get it. This whole thing can be really confusing sometimes. It's just my opinion, and I could be wrong too, so...😅

#majaloveschris #chris and alba pr #cevans-love

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phoenixfangs · 7 months

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okay so the hate on photorealism in video games is kinda goofy to me ngl. like, its fine to have a preference for stylized visuals (i definitely do!), but a game is not Better for it just on the face of it

and like, as a webbed site of creatives, are NONE of u interested in the mechanics of developing a photorealistic experience?? like the process of looking at something in real life and recreating it through art as closely to real life as possible isnt fascinating?? motion capture is sick as hell, especially because its not 2011 anymore and we dont have quantic dream/heavy rain as like the Peak of what mocap is capable of. supermassive i think does a good job with their realism. until dawn has some goofiness with how big the expressions needed to be for the mocap to work, and there are parts where u can Tell it was animated manually, poorly (joshs mental break in the mines... there are parts that are kinda oof), but otherwise overall it still looks pretty damn good to me! and brenda song in the quarry is like, there are moments where i feel like i am actually looking at the real life brenda song (particularly when shes in the car at the junkyard and screaming for dylan to get the damn werewolf off the car, that moment in specific looks Incredible to me)

and thats just people. developing accurate to real life physics/visuals for objects and like grass and water and stuff, does it not enchant yall to know that somebody, a team, whatever, had to meticulously plan that and build it? and even if its not absolutely indistinguishable from real life, isnt it cool how good it Does look? i feel like people say shit like 'its a video game i know what im looking at isnt real, why do they even try' and its like Fucking Duh, we all know that, the devs know that, but they do it because its COOL. and also sometimes maybe it fits the tone of the story or the play experience Better than stylization, idk

im not trying to say that stylization is less work than photorealism, but i also dont think the opposite is true, either. i dont think photorealism is less work than stylization. it ALL depends on manpower from artists that are passionate about their craft.

and again, as a webbed site of artists, i find it strange to bash photorealism and say its worse than stylization at all. like would any of u say half the shit u say about photorealistic games to a painter that works with photorealism? i dont think u would, because u understand that a painter is still responsible. a human artist created that. to me its the same with photorealistic games, people still have to design and model and code and animate all dat shit, and it has just as much opportunity to be impressive and impactful as a stylized game does

#mine #idk im just rambling. but i dont think photorealism is the video game quality killer or whatever #even if a realistic game does look like shit. guess what. there are stylized games that Also look like shit #that is not exclusive to photorealism. its the nature of creating anything that it can look good or shit #anyway. thats my extended controversial take #if u disagree please argue wtih me about this i want to know why u think im wrong Genuinely

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leejihoonownsmyheart · 7 months

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thank goodness you're using your linguistics skills for writing svt fanfic! that's what the class was made for frfr

give me a moment to recover from that wonwoo draft. wtf was that. coordinated attack. holy shit. OKAWJGOWJO HOW COULD YOU?? OUT OF NOWHERE??? WITH GLASSES TOO?? STOP (stop, baby don't stop. stop, baby don't stop. PIPAPIPAPA) (that was nct, pls get that reference)

sorry NOT SORRY FOR INTERRUPTING YOUR THESIS WORK. (ok but seriously get that done. thesis work has been the bane of my existence)

UNDER YOUR FLASHDRIVE LMAOOO AND THE NAME??? ROUGH JOSH??? the day you release it will mark the best day tumblr will ever i have i fear....

DUDE I LOVE SAGS WDYM ALL OF MY BEST FRIENDS ARE SAGS YOU GUYS NEED MORE RECOGNITION

come over sometime 😊😊😊 with your husband woozi 😊😊😊 so you guys can meet me and my husband (wonwoo) 😊😊😊😊😊😊

-HAPPY HANNIE DAY FROM 🫨 ANON

That’s actually why i am getting my degree cause honestly what would be the use of it otherwise???

NO I ACTUALLY HAVE SO MUCH MORE IN THAT WONWOO DRAFT TOO I HOPE THE GERMAN IN IT ISNT TOO MUCH BUT TO ME?! BRO IM NOT EVEN INTO THAT BUT IM REALLY LOVING THIS DRAFT HAHA

I think i’ll get my thesis done this weekend 🤞

NO ITS ACTUALLY NOT EVEN GOING TO BE THAT GOOD PLEASE BRING YOUR HOPES DOWN THE IDEA IS LITERALLY LIKE BEST FRIENDS YN AND JOSH AND THEN HE FINDS OUT WHAT SHES INTO AND IS LIKE I can do that and yn is like ?!?!?! AND TBH THATS NOT A GREAT PREMISE

OMG A DATE WITH THE HUSBANDS SOUNDS FUN!!! IM ALREADY EXCITED OMG…

#HAPPY LATE HANNIE DAY #I MADE THE CUTEST BRACELETS #b: 🫨 anon

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kidnamedfinger · 2 years

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[double posted to make it less long to scroll] ok but thats not what josh is saying in the tweet right? theyre just saying that object impermanence happens and it isnt intrinsically a shunning of people and people shouldnt automatically read into it and assume malevolent intent in not reaching out to someone. it doesnt say "if your friend refuses to talk to you suddenly it means they forgot about you and you should baby them." because thats obviously not reasonable.

i agree that diagnosis culture CAN make people not want to take accountability. i forget about my irl friends for certain amounts of time if theyre not in front of me - genuinely, i do. if you think thats a thing that babies do thats fine. but i also do feel bad about it and i try to do things like scheduling hangouts with people or send memes to them when i can or just message them when im thinking of them just to say hi. its not like i use my adhd dx (which i do have) to make it other peoples' problem. so its just random that p.e., whose tweets i otherwise enjoy, would jump on this specific tweet which - compared to what most terminally online people say about having adhd - is pretty harmless.

ironically, to me it seems like p.e. is ascribing malintent to josh in this tweet, and literally all that josh's tweet asks is to NOT automatically ascribe malintent to people who aren't always initiating social content. this is a relevant distinction because ive been approached many times by people whose communication styles differ from my own, who assume that because im a bit late with returning a personal message or because i havent talked to them in a while that i have a problem with them. and in the worst case scenario, it turns into a whole thing where that person assumes im avoiding them or ignoring them because i actively dont want to communicate with them. or maybe they just are worried (e.g. literal family members whose existence and messages i forget about) and want to be able to reach me when they need to. luckily, sometimes its resolved when i can agree to respond to messages quicker and set reminders on my phone and all that. actionable steps i take to be accountable for my behavior as an adult. not letting the chemicals in my brain totally dictate how i behave forever. but i forget sometimes or i slip up sometimes. and thats why i, like josh, would ask for some grace.

sorry to jump on this tweet thing - it would be double ironic if /i/ assumed malintent from p.e. in replying to this in the first place, and the larger point is valid. but i feel that the legitimate criticism - which is a criticism of using adhd or any dx as a substitute for refusing to take accountability of ones adult agency - should not automatically be whipped out when someone with adhd talks about an experience they have in their lives and asks for a bit of understanding in a relatively neutral context. sure josh could have worded it without the whole "eyes light up" thing i see how it sounds infantilizing. but the rest of the points dont feel connected to the tweet theyre quoting. unfair, even. sorry.

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rainninpain · 1 year

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My boyfriend of four years cheated on me and thr only reason I ever found out was because he paid this female for sex it was a regular thing between them for several years before he met me. Ive been struggling for awhile with my mental health and was actually in the hospital when he fucked this bitch. He didn't pay her all of what he owed so she messaged me to tell me what they did and to tell me her youngest kid was his.

Before the revelation of cheating came about I handed him my phone one night so he could look something up, I was grooming my dog. He not only looked up what we needed he went to my texts messages and looked for messages between another ex bf and a former fiance. There were inappropriate messages from them talking about sex but there was never any acting on it as opposed to be actually physically got with this chick.

Anyhow for months and months he tried to find more and more ways to make me that bad guy when he crossed the physical line. I never denied those texts were inappropriate in a relationship, but he found ways to continuously find ways to read my emails and messages. First i locked the phone, than my tablet, than my car from when my phone was on blue tooth and than finally my smart watch.

I had been sexually assaulted and he didnt seem to care he pressured me more and more about how we werent habing sex and he needed intimacy and blah blah. He brought this shit up over and over for two years. I asked him repeatedly to table the conversation about our sex life and intimacy but he wouldnt.

Two weeks ago I called him out on the fact that he rarely listened to me when talking to him about anything. He didn't say anything. I asked him how often he was talking to the chick he fucked he said rarely. I already knew that was a lie but wanted him to be honest and he wasn't. Than i saw she was coming to town to visit whatever family she has here and i asked him and he lied again. He than got pissed off at me for telling him she couldnt come in our home nor was i going to allow him to take our vehicle to go see her and/or give her a ride. He laughed and called me dumb.

I asked what normal woman would be ok with their partner talking too and hanging out with the woman they cheated with?! He said probably none.

A week goes buy and I am no longer able to fight with him.about this but asked why he can't just be honest. The next night he sends me a text message, couldnt even tell me in person that he isnt in love with me and hasnt been and all this other fucked up shit. We just bought a $500,000 home and hes planning to move out and take the only car we have and leave me fucked. Tonight he tells me his pos alcoholic former bestfriend got his army disability money and he will be leaving even sooner cus the friend owes him $10,000. I asked if he told Josh we aren't together and he says yeah and wtf does it matter since Josh and I dont even speak anymore. I had to deal with Josh's shit for almost 2 years because of my bf. Josh is an alcoholic and caused so many issues.

This is not the first time Justin hurt me i nearly died in 2017 because of him and a friend bullying me. I NEVER should have trusted him again but I have bpd and didn't want to be alone and he promised he would never hurt me again and yet thats all he has done. My dad died 4 May 2021 and my mom 19 April 2022. So i have had nothing but fucked up shit for awhile now. Which is why my mind goes to the darkest and impulsive places. I hate life more and more everyday. My mom was my bestfriend and we were there for eachother and never abandoned. Now not only she is gone but my dad to and I am alone in this world because I trusted someone I shouldn't have. A pos like him. I should have known better....here i am alone in an expensive house with tons of pets a place I thought i would be happy because we bought it and got this specifically for my mom becauae it is handicap accessible but she died two months after moving in.

I truly no longer care about anyone and anything. The more I allow myself to feel things the more pain I end up in. I just want it all to stop. SI is on my mind constantly. The method I'd use so it would guarantee no coming back. The other times I called my doctor and she called 911.

I'm a fucking idiot and an absolute failure at everything. I can't even work because my mental health. I quit working after my first suicide attempt on 7 February 2016. That attempt was the worst of all and I wasn't expected to make it. Why I did I have no clue. I guess I was a puece of shit person in another life and this is KARMA or maybe its just karma for all the shit ive done my entire life.

I always want to help people and everything I ever did that was good never happened in other peoples eyes. I am the villain. I sacrificed half my life to take care of my addict sisters kids and yet my plder sister who actually did the fucked up shit before and after the kids mom died gets all the credit for everything I did. Thats an entire other situation but it all culminates to now and what I am dealing with. I don't know or understand why everyone hates me, why they abandon me, why the hurt me, what is wrong with me?!? I don't belong on this Earth. All I have is constant unbearable pain from loss, grief, depression, anxiety, sadness, trauma, ptsd, bpd, bipolar. What is the point in continuing to live this miserable life?! No one misses me. No one even talked to me at my mothers funeral.not even the other siblings!

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