#dont want to be here

[nathaliesgw]

Pls let me die, I honestly dont wanna be here any more, I just wanna be at peace.

#depressing shit #tw depressing stuff #sh addict #tw self destruction #self destructive behavior #i wanna die #i wanna disappear #dont want to be here #tw depressing thoughts #tw sui ideation

[krewpluszaka]

#Naightmare #depressing life #mental health #bpd #i'm sad #this is depressing #depressing shit #anxienty #psychiatry #blackwhite #depressiv #suicide #dont want to be here

[walrustrain]

What do you call it when you don’t want to feel anything? When feeling anything at all feels too much? When feeling happy, sad, excited, hopeful, hurt - it all feels too much?

Even feeling the positive feelings feel too much lately. I just don’t want to feel, I don’t want to experience I just want to disappear into thin air and not exist. I want to crawl out of my skin and go away.

I don’t want to die, I just want to disappear into oblivion never to be found again. Where I won’t have to feel, or experience, or live or see anything.

What do you call this feeling?

#no friends #tired #no love #unloveable #depressed #numb #sad #hurt #ugly #fat #don’t want to feel #dont want to be here #alone #lonely

[broken21]

Crumbling

I was so fucking fine. And with fine I mean struggling, but willing to try. Now everything is crumbling. I've been falling apart again and again like a never ending cycle. I'm so fucking tired of this.

#crumble #falling #falling fucking apart #tired #dont want to be here #wanna disappear #havent used crying tag in a while #because there are no tears #feeling too much #failure #a fucking failure #i need a synonym for fuck/fucking #help? no #dont deserve it #you dont deserve anything #i'm so fucking tired of you #we're going nowhere #we'll stay on your mind #voices in my head #voices #they're just voices #and still have a lot of power over me

[ellsss]

strictly an arcane and atla/tlok blog now, if that bothers you, unfollow...

#free palestine #fuck this world #dont want to be here

[sainticides]

i live in a play of my own creation. i could write myself out of this tragedy, but i can’t. and even if i could, i don’t know if i would.

#im so tired #dont want to be here

[scraps-of-genius-or-insanity]

#mental health #sad thoughts #anger #trauma #emotionalpain #generational trauma #lonelier version of you #wishing #im really tired #sadgirl #dont want to be here #heartache

[renaway-art]

Floating away

And yeah my hand hurt after this >~<

#artistsoninstagram #pencil #truma art #dont want to be here #floating

[carmella102]

Seemed fun so gave it a try!

#self mutalition #self h@rm #self-h@rm #tw self destructive behavior #tw s3lf harm #s3lfh4rm #tw ana thoughts #suicudal #trauma #abandoned #dont want to be here #tw sui attempt #tw sh relapse #tw self destruction #tw self h@rm

[svgar-hiccup]

im literally in a shithole. i cant handle recovery. i want to recover but its so hard. its too hard. i genuinely dont know what to do anymore. eating makes me feel like shit. not eating makesme feel like shit. this is a dead end

#tw ana relapse #ed vent #dont want to be here #im not hungry #tw ana shit

[the-quiet-girl-thats-invisible]

I feel so alone and broken. Everyone online here or matches me on a dating app is just looking for a hook up or to get to that point sooner rather than later. I miss having someone who just wants me for me and to get to know me before getting intimate. But I feel like that is pretty non-existent. And I feel like such a fucked up person who will never find someone who wants me.

#dont want to be here #heart break #heartache #depressed

[howlingwolf23]

Resisting the sudden urge of yelling "I'm here, I'm queer, and I want to go home" when people ask me how I am doing at work today

#work sucks #dont want to be here #so brave #im here #im queer

[krewpluszaka]

#depressing shit #depressing life #mental health #bpd #i'm sad #this is depressing #depressiv #blackwhite #anxienty #psychiatry #im so fucked #Useless me #dont want to be here #Dont want to live anymore #Stupid life #Trash #killing myself #im so done

[mrzoost]

I feel like crying.

I don't want to live anymore.

Why why why why is everything so fucking hard?

I don't actually feel suicidal but like I wouldn't mind not being alive right now.

and I know how it can feel when I do actually want to live ... wow

#i'm sad #mental instability #dont want to be here

[rainninpain]

My boyfriend of four years cheated on me and thr only reason I ever found out was because he paid this female for sex it was a regular thing between them for several years before he met me. Ive been struggling for awhile with my mental health and was actually in the hospital when he fucked this bitch. He didn't pay her all of what he owed so she messaged me to tell me what they did and to tell me her youngest kid was his.

Before the revelation of cheating came about I handed him my phone one night so he could look something up, I was grooming my dog. He not only looked up what we needed he went to my texts messages and looked for messages between another ex bf and a former fiance. There were inappropriate messages from them talking about sex but there was never any acting on it as opposed to be actually physically got with this chick.

Anyhow for months and months he tried to find more and more ways to make me that bad guy when he crossed the physical line. I never denied those texts were inappropriate in a relationship, but he found ways to continuously find ways to read my emails and messages. First i locked the phone, than my tablet, than my car from when my phone was on blue tooth and than finally my smart watch.

I had been sexually assaulted and he didnt seem to care he pressured me more and more about how we werent habing sex and he needed intimacy and blah blah. He brought this shit up over and over for two years. I asked him repeatedly to table the conversation about our sex life and intimacy but he wouldnt.

Two weeks ago I called him out on the fact that he rarely listened to me when talking to him about anything. He didn't say anything. I asked him how often he was talking to the chick he fucked he said rarely. I already knew that was a lie but wanted him to be honest and he wasn't. Than i saw she was coming to town to visit whatever family she has here and i asked him and he lied again. He than got pissed off at me for telling him she couldnt come in our home nor was i going to allow him to take our vehicle to go see her and/or give her a ride. He laughed and called me dumb.

I asked what normal woman would be ok with their partner talking too and hanging out with the woman they cheated with?! He said probably none.

A week goes buy and I am no longer able to fight with him.about this but asked why he can't just be honest. The next night he sends me a text message, couldnt even tell me in person that he isnt in love with me and hasnt been and all this other fucked up shit. We just bought a $500,000 home and hes planning to move out and take the only car we have and leave me fucked. Tonight he tells me his pos alcoholic former bestfriend got his army disability money and he will be leaving even sooner cus the friend owes him $10,000. I asked if he told Josh we aren't together and he says yeah and wtf does it matter since Josh and I dont even speak anymore. I had to deal with Josh's shit for almost 2 years because of my bf. Josh is an alcoholic and caused so many issues.

This is not the first time Justin hurt me i nearly died in 2017 because of him and a friend bullying me. I NEVER should have trusted him again but I have bpd and didn't want to be alone and he promised he would never hurt me again and yet thats all he has done. My dad died 4 May 2021 and my mom 19 April 2022. So i have had nothing but fucked up shit for awhile now. Which is why my mind goes to the darkest and impulsive places. I hate life more and more everyday. My mom was my bestfriend and we were there for eachother and never abandoned. Now not only she is gone but my dad to and I am alone in this world because I trusted someone I shouldn't have. A pos like him. I should have known better....here i am alone in an expensive house with tons of pets a place I thought i would be happy because we bought it and got this specifically for my mom becauae it is handicap accessible but she died two months after moving in.

I truly no longer care about anyone and anything. The more I allow myself to feel things the more pain I end up in. I just want it all to stop. SI is on my mind constantly. The method I'd use so it would guarantee no coming back. The other times I called my doctor and she called 911.

I'm a fucking idiot and an absolute failure at everything. I can't even work because my mental health. I quit working after my first suicide attempt on 7 February 2016. That attempt was the worst of all and I wasn't expected to make it. Why I did I have no clue. I guess I was a puece of shit person in another life and this is KARMA or maybe its just karma for all the shit ive done my entire life.

I always want to help people and everything I ever did that was good never happened in other peoples eyes. I am the villain. I sacrificed half my life to take care of my addict sisters kids and yet my plder sister who actually did the fucked up shit before and after the kids mom died gets all the credit for everything I did. Thats an entire other situation but it all culminates to now and what I am dealing with. I don't know or understand why everyone hates me, why they abandon me, why the hurt me, what is wrong with me?!? I don't belong on this Earth. All I have is constant unbearable pain from loss, grief, depression, anxiety, sadness, trauma, ptsd, bpd, bipolar. What is the point in continuing to live this miserable life?! No one misses me. No one even talked to me at my mothers funeral.not even the other siblings!

#borderline personality disorder #loss of loved one #fuck life #tw depressing thoughts #please dont leave me #hate life #hated #everything is awful #unloved #piece of shit #cheating boyfriend #lies lies and more lies #sex trauma #abuse survivor #suicide survivor #i want to be alone #dont want to be here #fuck you #broken #death #youre nothing #borderline personality traits #bipolar #ptsd

[i-liveit]

I can't breathe

#depression #suicide #i cant breathe #help #help me #mental health #bipolar disorder #alone #dont want to be here #fuck life #fuck this #im done