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bullet-clubs-bitch · 2 months

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The Dark Side Of The Moon

Hangman Adam Page X Fem Reader

Summary: Hangman falls for dark and mysterious Y/n who is a part of the Blackpool Combat Club. Despite their ongoing rivalry, he can’t seem to get Y/n out of his head. Every time she jumps him from behind, leaving him in a puddle of his own blood it only causes him to fall harder. Deep down inside Hangman knew Y/n cared, that she did indeed have a soul and he would do anything to find it. Everyone told him this was a bad idea. It was obvious that Y/n had mental issues and was ‘broken’ but Adam didn’t care. He wanted to fix her. He would stop at nothing to reach the dark side of the moon, which in this case was the light side of Y/n’s heart. Who knows maybe he would end up saving her life or better, they’d save each others.

Warnings: Blood, Violence, Drug use/abuse, Self-harm, swearing, mentions of mental health issues, SMUT and other sensitive topics

An: I think this is my favourite fic I've ever done. This one pulled on the heartstrings. I can't believe I got it to 8k and could have easily made it longer too! Hope you enjoy it!

Word Count 8k Main Masterlist

I don’t know what it was that I saw in Y/n. She was cold, dark and viscous. She had no soul and people feared her, she was a threat. Yet I believed I could change her. Not that I thought she needed to be changed but I thought I could fix whatever she had hidden away under those walls she had built up. Once upon a time, I knew Y/n although she didn’t know me. I had seen her circling the independent circuit starting out as a wrestler as I was just getting my break. I had secretly kept an eye on her for all those years. When I found out she was a free agent I suggested to Matt and Nick we should sign her. They liked what they saw and soon Y/n was All Elite. She was quickly scooped up by The Blackpool Combat Club and was soon the biggest heel in our company. You could tell just by looking at Y/n that she’s been through things in her young life. Maybe it was the constant dark circles and tired look in her eyes. Maybe it was scars that were scarred around her body that she wore with pride. Some were faded while others weren’t. Some were from life and matches but others you could tell were self-inflicted. As much as all of these things helped the whole look she was going for I knew deep down inside that wasn’t the real Y/n. No one had ever seen her genuinely smile, no one had ever seen her laugh. It was like she was emotionless but I knew deep down she did have feelings, they were just hidden from the world. Every week Y/n would arrive and leave the arena with the BCC she stuck with them like glue. I knew the BCC claimed that they did everything together but I didn’t think it was true.

One night I caught Y/n smoking in the hotel lobby late after a show. I almost didn’t recognize her. For starters she wasn’t with the BCC, since it was close to 2 am I assumed they were asleep. The second thing I noticed was what Y/n was wearing. She wore a creme-coloured oversized hoodie with a pair of black velvet PJ shorts. Along with that, she had knee-high pink fuzzy socks and black fluffy uggs. It was nice seeing her in color other than black. She also wasn’t wearing any makeup, the flame from her cigarette illuminated her face in an ethereal way. I never realized she was so young. Her skin was youthful, she was beautiful. Not that she wasn’t before but this was a different type of beauty. Underneath the heavy dark makeup she wore you could see just how gorgeous she truly was.

I told this all to Matt Nick and Kenny the next time I saw them, they however had some different opinions. Kenny first said it was weird I was spying on her but I just happened to run into her. I thought about approaching her but I was nervous about what the end result would be so I observed from afar. Matt was quick to remind me just who she was “You do realize she is a part of The Blackpool Combat Club right? They are insane! I’m not trying to be rude or anything but I’m just looking out for you. I don’t want to see you get hurt” I appreciated his concern but at the same time was offended by his comments. This whole thing ended up spiraling into Nick and Matt arguing with the other on why I should and shouldn’t be feeling this way for Y/n. I regret even mentioning it in the first place. Kenny tried to comfort me but I was too far gone. “I agree with Nick, I think that although she is scary you two would be a nice pair. You could balance the other out” he said. Balance out? Was he calling me soft? Yes sure I’d been told I can give off golden retriever vibes but if need be I can flip and be bad too. For god sake, we all got suspended for getting into a fight with Punk! Anyway this was the last of my worries, I had a match with none other than Jon Moxley tonight. I knew that Y/n would be ringside and I wanted to show her that I could be tough and bad too.

I stood calmly in the ring as I watched Mox and Y/n make their entrance. I felt my breath get caught in my throat as she approached me. For some reason I was nervous. I had never been nervous around her before but I guess that was because I didn’t have these feelings yet. Throughout the match Y/n did her usual distractions, distracting the ref, pulling my feet from underneath me even using herself as a shield to protect Mox. I knew she would do all of these things but this time it was different. The mind games she played were working, I found myself hypnotized by her beauty. I was in fact so distracted that I didn’t even see Mox charging right at me. I swear I saw Y/n mouth ‘Look out’ but it was too late. I don’t remember much after that. I felt my body hit the canvas hard, my head bouncing on contact. I got knocked out.

When I finally came to, I was surrounded by AEW medical staff and some of the talent. “How are you feeling?” asked one of the doctors. “My head hurts,” I told them, feeling the throbbing in the back of my head. “You took a pretty nasty fall” I reached up and felt several bandages on the back of my head, how hard did I hit? After going through both verbal and physical tests the backstage medic said I didn’t need to go to the hospital which was a sigh of relief. I found out that I did a whole backflip when being hit with a lariat, I landed on my head, right in front of Y/n.

It was quite a scary moment for everyone. The match was ended immediately and Mox was able to tend to the crowd, distracting them from the scene that unfolded before them. I was shocked to find out that Y/n had been there the whole time. She stayed the whole time as doctors catered to me. She had even followed them backstage, leaving only minutes before I came to. I didn’t know why she would do that, we weren’t friends, we didn’t even talk. To me, this proved exactly what I thought. She did have a soul. As I watched the match back along with the cut footage I was able to see how the whole thing played out. It was obvious that I was mesmerized by Y/n, I was practically drooling. She played on it, using it to her advantage so Mox could have the upper hand. She did tell me to watch out and I was able to see the horror in her eyes as I hit the canvas. She was in shock, hell everyone was but since Y/n wasn’t one for showing her emotions when she did show them it was quite obvious. Since the whole thing happened in front of her out of instinct she was the first to check on me, yelling to the official that I was out cold. Luckily the camera didn’t catch her breaking character but many still had their phones out, capturing the whole thing. She stayed next to me, supporting my head/neck until medical arrived then she stood from a distance as medical did their thing. Throughout the whole thing, her facial expressions remained cold but her eyes told the whole story.

I also found out that people had a thing or two to say about the whole situation. Others praised Y/n for making sure I was okay and in a way saving my life while others claimed she ruined the act. She broke character, she broke the fourth wall. The wrestlers didn’t care nor did the audience, it was the people online that did. It got so bad that Y/n ended up responding to the comments on Twitter.

“All of these comments about me checking on Hangman are really pissing me off. The first thing I learned in wrestling school is that the most important thing is to keep your opponent safe at all times no matter what. Did you really expect me to watch him fall on his head and get knocked out in front of me and do nothing? I was simply preventing his unconscious body from rolling out of the ring and getting more injured. You guys need to grow up. I have been knocked out before in the ring and it is no joke whatsoever. So what, I was making sure he was still breathing. Who cares if I was supporting his head/neck before medical could arrive? THIS IS PRO WRESTLING! It’s not like I was the one wrestling him. I only did those things because I was ringside and not involved in the match. I wouldn’t stop mid-match and perform CPR on my opponent! All of this was pure instinct, I wasn’t even thinking about what I was doing. Anyway, that’s my two cents. It’s over and I’m glad The Cowboy is okay.”

I ended up staying away for six weeks for percussion and when I returned all I could feel was the stares. Everyone wanted to know how I was doing, if I was cleared but all I cared about was seeing Y/n. I wanted to thank her. Once I escaped the crowd of people I found Y/n leaning against a wall. It was almost like she was waiting for me. “How are you feeling?” she asked “You took a pretty nasty fall. I thought you were dead” “I’m feeling much better now. Thank you for making sure I wasn’t dead” I told her. I swear I saw her smile for just a second but I wasn’t sure. “Well I’m glad you’re alright and sorry for causing it in the first place” “It’s not your fault, I should have been paying attention” I mean it truly was my fault. “I’ll see you around,” said Y/n and with that she left.

Although our interaction was short I couldn't stop thinking about Y/n. I wanted to get under her skin, I wanted to spend time with her and get to know the real Y/n. The thing is, like Matt said she was in the Blackpool Combat Club, what would she want to do with someone like me? Deep down inside I knew that this was only the beginning. I was angry, I was frustrated for allowing myself to be so careless and get such a stupid injury. I wanted my rematch. I decided I would use one of their own tricks against them, the mind games. It was subtle at first. I’d wait at the gorilla whenever the BCC entered the backstage area where we would exchange a few looks. I’d follow them around the arena, a silent reminder that I was always watching. How I could seek my revenge at any moment. I’d then move on to causing them matches. I sneaked out during one of Y/n’s matches and stood ringside waiting for her to notice. When she finally did she started yelling at me, that distraction caused her opponent to roll Y/n up for a sneaky victory. “I’m going to kill you!” She yelled.

It had gotten to the point where everyone was mad at each other and the promo battle began. I was the first to call out the BCC claiming that it was all Y/n’s fault that I got injured. I mean it was, you could get lost in her eyes, I did and look what happened. Soon after the sneak attacks began. I didn’t know what I was thinking, I was outnumbered big time but even though it was just me I was able to get under their skin and they hated it. As I was filming yet another backstage segment I was inputted by Y/n. She came up to me all flirtatious wearing a black pleated skirt and a black corset top where her breasts were practically falling out. “Heyyyy Cowboy” Y/n said as she twisted her hair. “I just wanted to apologize for everything. I didn’t mean for you to get hurt and I didn’t mean for everything to go this far.” As she spoke she kept coming closer to me to the point where we were chest to chest. “I feel really bad about it, let me make it up to you….” It’s a trick, say no, this is a trap. Every bone in my body told me it was a trick but I couldn't deny her offer. The chokehold she had on me was too strong, I couldn't breathe. I didn’t say anything, I wanted her to continue. She pulled a key card and a slip of paper from her top. “Here is my room key, meet me after the show” She handed me the card and kissed me on the cheek. I couldn't breathe, my body went numb.

I stood in front of Y/n’s hotel room, key card in hand. I was scared to knock, I knew it was a trap but a part of me hoped it wasn’t. That was the part that led me here. I knocked on the door and was pleasantly greeted by Y/n. She wore a gorgeous black lingerie set that had me practically foaming at the mouth. She was acting all sweet and kind, I didn’t buy a second of it. Yet I did nothing about it. “I’ve been expecting you,” She said seductively as she grabbed me by my collar and began to kiss me passionately. I kissed her back, as she wrapped her legs around me. Y/n was first to break the kiss saying “I have a surprise for you” I was skeptical at first but was more interested in this ‘surprise’. Y/n grabbed a black silk blindfold and tied it around me. She carefully brought me to the bed, giving me one last kiss before she disappeared. “Where are you going?” I asked her. “Hold on…I’m getting the surprise ready. You can open your eyes when I tell you” I didn’t even notice that the BCC was in the room the whole time, Bryan stood behind the door, Mox by the bedside table and Claudio and Yuta hid in the washroom. During my time being blindfolded the men exposed themselves and Y/n retrieved the hidden weapons. “Okay, you can open your eyes!” said Y/n. When I removed the blindfold that’s when I saw them. “Fuck”

I didn’t even get a chance to defend myself. This was a four-on-one attack. I tried my best to protect myself as fighting back wouldn’t do anything but it was useless. I was left covered in bruises in a pool of blood. My body ached as yet another Kendo Stick cracked on my back. My eyes were fixated on Y/n during the whole attack. She just sat and watched the attack unfold before her. Everything about her was cold, the lifeless expression on her face, her mysterious body language. I searched for something, anything that would tell me she cared, that she felt bad but I found nothing. The lust that was once in her eyes moments ago had been replaced with a seductive evil look.

I watched Y/n stand up, the attack was over. My body now lay on the floor, I couldn't move. She knelt next to me and said “Stupid cowboy, you fell right into my trap. Although you’re adorable I must say you are quite an idiot. This is the oldest trick in the book, even you should have seen this coming. This isn’t personal, It’s just business. You did this all to yourself, you thought you could call us out like that and there wouldn’t be consequences? This is what happens when you mess with The Blackpool Combat Club '' Y/n placed one last delicate kiss on my lips before leaving the room, leaving me in a pile of my own blood.

***

Currently, I sat in the Elite’s private locker room, being lectured by Matt, Nick and Kenny. “I told you this was going to happen! What were you thinking?!” Yelled Matt. “That’s the issue, he wasn’t. He’s been hypnotized by Y/n. Isn’t it obvious that he’s in love with her!” Said Kenny

He was right, I was in love with Y/n. I have no idea why. She has been attacking me for weeks, for god sake last night I was left in a pile of my own blood, battered and bruised. Despite all of that I just kept falling harder and harder for Y/n. “Is that true? You’re in love with her?” asked Nick. “I don’t know what it is that I see in her Nick, I really don’t. I’m just so drawn to her, I know that underneath all that darkness there is a light that is dying to be let out! I need to find that light. I know that I can change her, she’s broken and I can fix her. Now I don’t ask you for much but I need your help with this! I need to get in” The men said nothing. They looked at me like I was crazy but they also looked as if they felt sorry for me.

“Look Hanger, I don’t think we can help you with this. Somehow you need to get Y/n on her own, that’s the only chance you have here. I don’t support this idea, I know it will end badly but I do agree with you that Y/n has some issues. Not that there's anything wrong with that but I just don’t think you need to be responsible for fixing it. All I will say is that Y/n doesn’t sleep at night. If you are lucky you might be able to run into her during a 3 am workout or a smoke sesh. Good luck man. You can call me for backup if you need” Kenny told me sincerely. “Thank you”

That night I couldn't sleep, all I could think about was the events that occurred not even 24 hrs ago. I had Y/n where I needed her, I had her pressed up against the wall, she was so close yet so far. I didn’t even care that I got beat up, it was worth the makeout sesh that happened before. Her lips were soft, her kisses were passionate. She smelt like vanilla and tobacco, her exposed skin was warm and delicate. She didn’t feel real, she was a figment of my imagination. I let that imagination run wild, I pictured what would happen if the BCC wasn’t there. The way I would scoop her up in my arms and make the most beautiful love to her. I would worship her body like the temple it was. I would slowly and passionately make her come undone. I would make her submit to me, but if she wanted it the other way around I wouldn’t complain. I was putty in her hands. My brain played a trick on me, my imagination was too real. It felt too real.

“I’ve been expecting you,” Y/n said seductively as she grabbed me by my collar and began to kiss me passionately. I kissed her back, as she wrapped her legs around me. “You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting this” I told her “I know baby, I know. I want you too, I need you” she said. I carefully brought Y/n to the bed, placing her on it delicately before getting on top of her. I had her wrists pinned above her head as I placed rough kisses along her body. I found that sweet spot on her neck and made sure to leave a mark. Sucking on the sensitive flesh as she cried out in pleasure. I removed her clothing gently as if I was unwrapping a present. She looked beautiful underneath me. I quickly removed my own clothing before returning to Y/n. We fought for dominance but in the end I won. It felt like our bodies were made for eachother, I had found my other half. Y/n felt beautiful around me, she made me feel so good.

Just as I was getting to the good part of my dream I woke up.

I checked the time and it was close to 2 am, my gut was telling me Y/n was near. Like Kenny said, my only shot with her was when she was alone. I quickly threw on a pair of gray sweats and a T-shirt and made my way down to the hotel lobby. Just like I suspected I found Y/n by the outdoor fire lounge smoking a cigarette, writing something in a notebook. I slowly approached her, not wanting to scare her. “What do you want, Cowboy?” Y/n asked. The tone she said it in was quiet, it was soft, it was weird. “Can I sit?” I asked and she motioned me to sit next to her. “What are you doing out here so late by yourself? It’s cold and there are creeps out there” I told her. Y/n put out the cigarette and turned to face me. Her pupils were huge, her face and body relaxed, I knew Molly when I saw it, that explains why she wasn’t screaming at me. “What is it that you see in me? I’m fucked up, no one wants to be with someone like me.” She said sadly, it broke my heart. “Y/n I know you’re hurting, I don’t know what you went through but I’m sorry it happened to you. Now I came out here for a whole other reason but you are not okay-” “I’m fine, you know nothing about me” “Then tell me, I want to learn. I want to know every single detail about you Y/n. You are playing a dangerous game right now, it’s only a matter of time before everything falls apart. I just can’t leave you like this, I promise I won’t try anything but I think you should come with me-” “Are you insane, I might be fucked up but I’m competent enough to know you want to fuck me” “No, No I promise not like that. I just want to repay you after you saved my life a few months back. I don’t care if you kill me tomorrow but you need to come with me Y/n” I told her sincerely. I could tell she was hesitant, she was in a vulnerable state but she agreed. I carefully took her back to my hotel room. I entered the room and assumed Y/n followed behind me. I turned and there she stood in the doorway. She looked like a scared lost child, it broke me.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” I asked her carefully. “It’s okay, you're okay” I didn’t know what to do in this situation. I know I said I wanted to get to know the real Y/n but the truth was the real Y/n was scaring me. The Y/n that stood back at me with big doe eyes was scared. Maybe this was the version that was hiding under the dark makeup and clothing. This was the Y/n that was hurt, this is the one I needed to fix. I approached her slowly and reached out my hand, trying to get her to follow me into the room. She flinched. “I shouldn’t be here, we can’t be doing this,” Y/n said quietly. “I know but I don’t seem to care,” I told her “Does Bryan know you do this? How would they feel if they saw you like this? Just come in so no one sees you” She entered the room slowly and sat down on the large king bed, her head down. I locked the door behind me and was able to notice just how bad of a state she was in. Her once straight hair had become frizzy, her natural curls trying to appear to the world. The clothing she wore was 2 sizes too big, she was swimming in it. She smelt like alcohol and cigarettes, her skin was ice cold. I joined her on the bed, sitting next to her wanting her to talk first. “What do you want from me?” she asked quietly “I just to help. Look Y/n, I really like you. I don’t care if you hate me but I don’t hate you. I just couldn't leave you like this” Y/n looked at me and with the new lighting I was able to see just how tired she looked. My brain still was trying to comprehend that she was on drugs. “What do you want to know?” She asked. “I want to know why you are like this, why do you do what you do?”

“I don’t think you know how exhausting it is to live like this. The moment I walk into that arena, the moment I feel a camera on me everything disappears. I am at peace, I am free. I can do whatever I want. The whole Death Jitsu thing is second nature, I live it on the daily. The moment I’m home, the moment I’m alone and that rush has worn off is when I feel it. That reality check hits and I’m done for. I see the world and people for who they truly are. Everyone is fake and everything sucks. You can only pretend so much, you can only lie to yourself for so long until you realize none of it is real. I don’t know why I act like this, maybe it’s the years of trauma that has made me scared to get hurt again. That’s why I act like I have no emotions but in reality, I am quite an emotional person. I was told I had too many feelings, that I cried too much, that I cared too much, that I loved too much. It’s easy to hide it from the world, I have been doing it since I was a child. It’s when you’re alone that everything you hide comes out and you feel like you have gone mentally insane. I do things I probably shouldn’t to keep those feelings inside. It ties me over till morning when I can put on a show and pretend that everything is okay. The thing is when you are so fucked you admit everything that is wrong with you. Here I am telling you my sob story when I should be hating you but the thing is I can’t. Somehow you have gotten in my head, you know my thoughts. You know about the mental issues I refuse to admit I have. I hate how without realizing I let you in. Now if you excuse me I must go.”

I grabbed Y/n’s hand, preventing her from leaving. “Why is it that you can’t hate me?” I asked her “I like you, I like who you are. You’re nice to everyone, you look like you would give the best hugs. You just have this aura to you. I said what I meant, you are adorable but you are an idiot. An idiot for falling for me. I’ll ruin your life. You don’t want a mentally ill girl who you will have to take care of like a scared child. When I saw you get knocked out in front of me it scared me. I’ve seen it happen too many times, I was having flashbacks. The difference was this time I could do something about it. After that night I had sympathy for you, I felt something for you. I felt like we developed this connection. It’s unfortunate this is happening, I don’t want to hurt you but you did this to yourself.”

I knew what she needed, she needed someone who would take care of her. She needed someone who would love her for all of her imperfections. Someone who could clean her cuts and kiss her scars. She needed someone to protect her and keep her safe from all the demons. This was a bad idea, I was playing a risky game. This could end badly, she could ruin my life but I was willing to take that risk. The worst thing that could happen is for the BCC to murder me for getting in their girl’s head. “Can I give you a hug?” I asked, she nodded and I held her in a tight embrace, holding her close as she began to cry. She was touch-deprived, which you would have never guessed. Wrestling is such a contact sport that you are always being touched. She was very attractive and many people had crushes on her, you would think she’d have some ‘fun’ now and then. The difference is this was a different kind of touching. This was filled with love. We stayed there for a while, I just held Y/n as she cried. I had broken down a wall, I was inside. Although other walls remained intact this was a step in the right direction. “I’m going to take care of you alright. I promise that everything will be okay Y/n. I’m not going anywhere” I continued to whisper sweet nothings to Y/n as I traced circles around her back.

Two weeks had passed since that night and I hadn’t seen Y/n since. I was getting nervous, what if something happened to her? What if she did something bad to herself? No one knew anything about the whereabouts of Y/n. I ended up asking Tony Khan where Y/n had been but all he told me was that she was dealing with some “Health Issues” By that he meant mental health issues. My issues with the BCC had cooled down but were far from over. Tonight I had my rematch against Jon Moxley. It was weird seeing the BCC without Y/n, I felt as If I was responsible for her absence. Did I push her too far that she finally jumped? I gave this fight my all, every strike, every kick I threw for Y/n. I wanted to make her proud. I wanted to let her know that I was waiting for whenever she was ready to talk. I blew Y/n a kiss through the camera before hitting a buckshot lariat. Although I was victorious I ended up injuring Mox, causing us to end up right where we started. After the match, Bryan Danielson handed me a sealed envelope. “This is from Y/n. I don’t know what you did to her but she’s more sick than normal so thanks for that” he spat as he threw the envelope at me.

That night I returned to my hotel I opened the envelope. It was a handwritten letter:

Hey Adam, hope everything is well. Just so you know I am not dead. You are probably blaming yourself for my absence but I have other things I’m dealing with. I’ve been spending time at home thinking about our conversation from the other night. I understand if I scared you away (I tend to do that to people) but I think I’m willing to take you up on your offer. Next week’s Dynamite is an hour from me. Here’s my address and # if you want to stop by. Sorry in advance for everything and remember that this stays between us.

- Y/n

I decided I would arrive a few days before Dynamite and check up on Y/n. I arrived at her house and knocked on the door nervously. When Y/n opened the door I couldn't help the gasp that left my mouth. “Do I really look that bad?” she asked. She didn’t look bad but she didn’t look the best. “Sorry, I’m just nervous” “Well I’m sober this time so I would be nervous too” Y/n joked. I admired her home, it was comforting. Artwork and photos covered the walls and plants were all scattered around. I noticed the white sage she had burning in the kitchen, crystals placed around carefully.

Y/n explained to me that Bryan ratted her out. They knew everything, I assumed they didn’t and if they did they simply did not care. Part of me was happy to know that the BCC wasn’t as oblivious to Y/n’s issues as I thought. The other part felt bad for her. Revolution was soon approaching and with Y/n on house arrest who knows when she would return. “So why did you really invite me over?” I asked “First I’m lonely and second I can’t stop thinking about what you said. You told me you would ‘take care of me’. That night is fuzzy to me but you cared. You held me in your arms as I cried. I don’t know what I was crying about but I felt safe. You told me everything was going to be okay and I believed you.” “Every word I said that night was true Y/n. I want to take care of you. I want to help you get clean, I want to be there for every sleepless night. I might sound crazy saying this but I’m in love with you. I don’t know why or how but I just am. I am so in love with you.” I was scared to admit how much I loved Y/n but I knew it would allow her to trust me. She would know I truly did want to help her. Y/n smiled at my words and pulled me in close, holding me tight against her.

“Where do we start?” I asked Y/n. I followed her to the kitchen and began to throw things out. “All you have to do is get clean right? No mandatory rehab or counseling?” I asked “Nope, I don’t think Bryan told them everything in the first place. All of this is staying under the radar and I should be back in time for revolution anyways.” That was good news. We were brutal with what we threw out. We tossed various liquors, sweet treats, anything that wasn’t good for you. Although Y/n was upset that we had to toss her chocolate I had to explain that if I got rid of one thing you become addicted to the next thing. If you toss everything at once it helps to stay on that clean streak. It was hard but we got through it. We spent that afternoon learning about each other, I was able to see Y/n smile and laugh. Those walls were coming down, she fully let me in. Before I knew it, it was dark outside. “Thank you for today but I should get going, it’s getting late” I told her. “If you want, I have a spare room. You can stay the night. There is supposed to be a storm coming anyways so the roads might be dangerous” I gladly accepted Y/n’s offer to spend the night.

Like she said, a storm indeed broke out. The thunderstorm was loud, the rain was beautiful. It described the mood perfectly. I was fresh out of the shower and went downstairs to find Y/n making a gorgeous dinner. Everything about her was perfect. She too was fresh out of the shower. I took a second to memorize how she looked in this moment, scared I would never see it again. Her hair was still damp as she went about making dinner. She looked so focused as she measured the ingredients. Her skin glowed in the dim lights, you could tell by her body language that she was relaxed. Once she noticed me she smiled and called me down the stairs. It was a genuine smile that made me smile. When I reached her I gave her a quick kiss and hug to thank her for having me stay the night. As I held her her skin was warm, she smelt like lavender, she felt like home. I know that this whole thing started off as me wanting to help her but she would also end up helping me. I didn’t even realize I had been going through some of the same things as Y/n. I nearly choked on my food when she said “I know we have spent so much time talking about me and my issues but why don’t we talk about you. You helped me with mine so I will help you with yours” I was shocked. “I’m fine, I don’t have any issues” I told her, offended. “Fine, but I know that Punk stuff still bugs you. If you don’t want to talk about that’s fine, but when you are ready to talk about it I will listen” she told me sincerely. I was quick to change the subject and pretend like that whole situation didn’t still bother me.

I helped Y/n clean up after dinner and the two of us decided to cuddle up on the couch together. Listening to the beautiful storm as one of my favorite albums Dark Side Of The Moon by Pink Floyd quietly played in the background. It was calming, the only light source was the fireplace in front of us. I know she didn’t mean it like that but I couldn't stop thinking about how Y/n said I had issues too. Sure I was an alcoholic, sure I had a temper but that’s nothing. I was interrupted by my thoughts when Y/n asked, “What’s on your mind cowboy?” “What?” “I know you're thinking about something, spill it” I had no choice. It was only fair I opened up to Y/n like how she did to me.

“Your right” I told her “Right about what?” she asked “About the Punk thing. It still bugs me. I don’t know why but it does. I just can’t seem to catch a break. I can’t breathe without him criticizing me. He started this whole thing to begin with, he is a salty old man who deserves everything that’s happening to him. The world has given him instant karma.” Y/n listened to every word I said. She never once interrupted me, she let me get everything out of my system before assuring me that none of this was my fault. That I was smart, talented and was more pretty than he was. Although her praises were small they left a big impact on me. I felt myself getting emotional, Y/n noticed this and was able to assure me everything would be okay. She sat on my lap, her arms around holding me close as she told me that everything would be okay. “Everything is going to be okay, I promise. Regardless of what happens with you and the BCC I’m not going anywhere. This can be our secret Adam, no one needs to know”

I completely forgot about my ongoing issues with the BCC. I didn’t even want to think about that right now. That was a later problem, all I wanted was to enjoy this moment with Y/n.

She must have read my mind as she began to place delicate kisses along my collar bone and my neck. I placed my hands on her hips as she slowly began to grind on me. I started kissing her back and I felt myself melt into her. I felt like everything was going to be alright. In a way I felt like I needed this more than her. As much as I wanted to love and take care of Y/n I also needed someone to love me back. I don’t remember the last time I felt this way about anyone, I don’t remember kissing with such love and passion. As I let my hands roam on Y/n’s body I carefully removed her top. I took a second to admire her natural beauty. I admired every scar, every beauty mark. I traced them all delicately, wanting to know the story behind them. Y/n noticed and asked “Is something wrong?” she looked scared, as if she got caught doing something bad. She whispered an “I’m sorry for scaring you” before she grabbing a blanket that was close by to cover herself up. Before I could say anything she was gone, running up the stairs to her room as the tears formed in her eyes.

I was quick to follow her. I quietly knocked on her bedroom door, waiting for a response. “Go away” she mumbled. “I’m sorry Y/n. You didn’t do anything wrong” I told her “Just let me in so I can explain myself” As I entered Y/n’s room I was taken away from the decor. All of this was the complete opposite of what she portrayed on TV. The room was filled with light pastel colors. In the corner of the room sat a big comfy chair filled with old dolls and plushies. I couldn't believe my eyes. This was the side that was hidden from the world. Y/n didn’t even look at me, she sat on her bed with her back towards me. I sat next to her telling her how sorry I was for making her upset. “I should be the one that’s apologizing” she told me “Why should you apologize? You did nothing wrong” I reassured her. “This is what always happens, I find someone and they claim to like me even with all my flaws. Once they get a close enough look they get scared and run off” I didn’t quite understand where she was going with this. “Scared of what?” I asked “Scared of who I really am, scared of the scars I have hidden. Take a look around you, would you expect any of this from me?” “I actually I did. I knew that deep down inside something like this was hidden. That is the part I wanted to explore. Y/n I want to know the real you. I don’t care about any of the things you mentioned. I admire the way you carry your scars with pride. I want to know the story behind them all. I want to be the one that cleans your wounds not makes them” I gently wiped away the tears that fell from her face and apologized for making her upset once again.

“I don’t deserve any of this” she told me “Yes you do, you deserve someone who loves you for who you are. I’ve never told anyone this before but me and you are more similar than you think. I take antidepressants too, I’m an alcoholic. I can’t sleep at night because the voices in my head won’t shut up. I was too focused on getting to know the real you that I haven’t even got the chance to know the real me” I could see the look in Y/n’s eyes soffen at my words. I removed my shirt and pointed to a faded scar on my left arm. “You see this, I did this. We are the same” I told her. “You’ve seen my matches Y/n. Just like you I live for the taste of my own blood. I love the way it feels. I haven’t felt things in a long time, I too use wrestling as an escape. I’m going to challenge Mox to a Texas death match so I can feel something inside. When I’m with you I feel like I can tell you anything. I can be myself. I feel safe, I feel at peace, I feel at home. I can tell that you will be my new home” I didn’t even notice the tears that fell from my face until Y/n kissed them away. “I love you too,” She told me.

The two of us ended the night cuddled up in bed underneath the warm covers. I held Y/n close as she slept. It took me a while to fall asleep, I listened to the rain and thunder as I took in the moment. As I looked at Y/n I couldn't help the warm fuzzy feeling in my chest. She was at peace. We didn’t sleep together that night but we didn’t need to. When that moment would arrive I wanted to take my time and savor it. It would be a healing experience for the both of us. Never in my life did I feel so calm, so at peace. I knew that everything would be okay. I too was touch deprived. All this was was skin on skin contact, my bare chest on hers as we fell asleep feeling so loved. I loved this woman so much. I would do anything for her and I knew she would do anything for me. The dark side of the moon is used to describe something mysterious and unknown. The dark side of the moon is supposed to be the side we never see, the side that faces away from Earth. Somehow I was able to find that in Y/n. I found the light side in her heart and I wouldn't take it for granted.

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