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demenior · 3 years

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Dem’s Big Post About The Spn Fics Part 1/2

aka The Wrap Up to celebrate To Exist Again and To Become a Man now being finished!

(This will be a long post. This is your only warning.)

Admittedly this is a bit of a weird thing to be doing, but I wanted to try it out for 3 reasons:

I love talking about my own work and

It functions really well as a self-reflective tool for me to improve on, and

I can answer some big questions people might have because there was a LOT of worldbuilding in these stories.

We’ll start off with reflective stuff, and move into the juicier world-building focused stuff later into the post. There will be major spoilers for both fics to come!

To begin with a funny anecdote, Why Did I Write These Stories?

I was beginning to write and work out the story that I wanted to write for Spn (what will now be To Destroy a Man. As I was writing the scene, I realized I had a LOT of ideas and while I was trying to avoid as much exposition as I could, it became quickly apparent that I was needing to create my own au (this scene eventually became chapter 34 of To Become a Man). A short prequel seemed like a good idea, to quickly hash out the ‘prior’ events that I needed to go through so all the readers could be on the same page. While plotting out prequel points, I realized Sam and Dean were going to have drastically different experiences during the same time period, and I was trying to figure out who’s pov would be better for which scenes, and how to keep momentum when they’re going through such radically different types of changes. Ultimately I decided to split their povs, which I also thought would be a fun project! And I naively assumed each pov would take about 2 chapters each, rounding out to maybe 15k total.

I had my ending points: Dean n Cas soul-merged and (basically) married, Cas on the lam from heaven and a complete anomaly, and Sam juiced up full of powers and a weird mix of archangel and antichrist but still 100% human and ready to fight God.

Now I needed to add weight to these changes, so I wrote 200k of build-up.

Am I proud of these fics?

OF COURSE I AM!!! These are the longest fics I’ve ever written AND finished AND in the fastest freakin turnaround ever (both were finished writing, barring edits, in like 6 months holy shit)

I didn’t write a single scene that I “didn’t” want to write. If I had trouble writing it, as in it was fighting me, I scrapped it. Most obviously was the scene in Dean’s pov where he and Sam were intended to meet some other hunters and Dean declines working with them because he’s nervous about being outed as queer. It was meant to be a good scene! I wanted to introduce some new characters! But it just wasn’t working so I said ‘thank you, next!’.

But it means this story was an absolute joy to write. Because for a while all I was doing was ‘if I wanted to write one scene into supernatural, what would I write?’ and then just DID that!! It’s why there’s a lot of ‘Salmondean do dumb shit or have really dumb heartfelt conversations’ scenes.

Would I change anything?

If I’d been less eager to start sharing, I might have planned out the story beats a little tighter so there were less ‘soft’ chapters and a draw/pull for people to come back and keep reading. I felt Dean’s story specifically lagged at points and could have used some tighter editing (there was a noticeable lull in directed movement between Dean n Cas getting together, until Sam corrupts Amy).

I also probably would have held Sam’s story until I’d finished Dean’s so I could make the two line up better! Probably could have inserted more scenes into Sam’s fic that way, and made sure things were a little more consistent. In an ideal world one concept I had was to release 1 chapter from each pov every week that would correspond to the same time frame so we’d be getting real-time SalmonDean pov narrative. Unfortunately that didn’t work!

The biggest takeaway overall is for me to focus more on what moves the plot, and to make my scenes do more than 1 thing so I can cut down on wordcount and increase my efficiency.

Of course every writer will find things they want to fix in anything they’ve ever written, so these are minor “mistakes” at best. I’m so dang proud of these fics.

Onto more interesting things!

How Did I Put These Fics Together (because it’s different than anything I’ve ever done before)

Normally when I write a story, I plan out the beats I need to hit, see where I need to insert any kind of foreshadowing/buildup, and then write from A to B to C and so on and so forth. Hence, this is why I can normally post things as I complete chapters, because it’s all a linear progression.

For these two stories, rather than linear plot/a normal story structure, I just sat and free-wrote any and every scene that came to mind and then pieced them into a kinda-linear form like putting a quilt together. You’ll note that this is why there’s not a lot of internal callback or a feeling of sense of time flowing within the fic (save for points where I went back and specifically edited it in). How long does the story take place over? Hard to say! Your author has the barest grasp on linear time even on a good day (how many times did I say ‘see you on [wrong day]’ at the end of chapters lmaaoooo)

This also meant EXTENSIVE editing on the back end once I decided in what order I wanted my ‘quilt pieces’ to be. Hard to say if this is a bonus or a negative!

But I did want to try and capture the vibe of the lives they lead, as a bit of a ‘slice of life’-style story, when the slice of life is the profound weirdness of the Winchester roaming life, and how things are status quo- until everyone almost dies oh shit!! And then they have to keep living because no therapy we die/undie like Winchesters. Do I think I captured this effectively? Hmm. Good question.

Dem where the FUCK did the inspiration for a lot of the magic and creature weirdness even come from?

Honestly? Music, primarily. And completely mishearing lyrics!

Nightwish ‘Ever Dream’: the line is ‘my song can but borrow you grace’ and because my brain is scrambled eggs on a good day, I heard ‘grace’ ‘song’ and ‘borrow’ in that order and have had, for YEARS, the mental image of Cas borrowing Dean’s soul to power himself up for battle.

From there I’ve always been enamored with the ‘wavelength of celestial intent’ descriptor that Cas drops in s6 for “what he is”.

I also really like ocean metaphors mostly because I’ve been obsessed with the ocean and things in it since I was like… 5??? So really this was me just rolling with what I know lmao. I love using (somewhat) accurate scientific metaphors for very intangible things!

I was also finishing my degree in biology/ecology while writing these fics and I think it shows

Stars ‘The Night Starts Here’ gives us the series title and the fic titles. Except for ‘To Exist Again’. TEA was almost titled ‘The Upwards Fall’ because I wanted all 3 of the Main Stories to have titles from this song, but I couldn’t make anything else work in tandem with the series name ‘The Love It Takes’ while also working for Sam’s personal story. So Sam, as always, is the rebel <3

Stars ‘Up In Our Bedroom, After The War’ is basically the vibes of the whole story. TFW has been, literally, to hell and back!!! There’s a bit of melancholy and sadness, a lingering dark, but the chance of a bright new tomorrow and a soft start.

Let’s Talk About Themes in The Story! What were you looking to accomplish?

My earliest notes for TFW are, as follows:

Dean’s journey of self-discovery (who am I when I’m not trying to be Dad?)

Dean wants to settle down! He wants a big family! He wants to be domestic!

Basically: Dean doesn’t want to have a short life of hunting. He wants to live!

Dean’s journey of realizing he’s bi, and him accepting that

Dean’s relationship to Sam is both older brother/parent

And continuing Dean balancing these roles while also letting Sam be an adult

Dean’s Big Issues/Fears about never being good enough for people to want to stay with him (these are effectively highlighted in that Cas thinks he’s not useful enough to be wanted)

Sub Plot:

Castiel’s autonomy

Cas’ fall from grace, to trying to restore Heaven, to wrecking it further

He’s majorly depressed by the end of s7 (before purgatory)

Wants to stay in Purgatory but doesn’t tell Dean

Remains depressed after leaving, but resolved to keep living on because he’s clearly meant for something

After the seraphim reveal: does he have free will?! How does he grapple with this? How does he live in a way he can be proud of?

And lastly

Sam gets his powers back CAUSE THATS HOT

where tf did they go????

he got them from Lucifer?????

sleeper agent??????

Sam is The Chosen One

Accepts that he is More Than Human and to celebrate all parts of him

Lucifer and Sam friends?? Work together????

Sam needs autonomy in his choices/his life

If you compare these to the overall arc of TFW within the two stories, I think I got a lot of them! But you’ll also note a lot of these things aren’t concrete goals that are easily measurable (ex: Dean wants to learn to bake pie. In chapter 1 he starts a fire in the kitchen. By the end of the story he finally makes A Good Pie.) part of the lack of concrete milestones was why I felt it was important to tell Dean (and Cas’) story by going back to the point they meet, in s4! Dean’s gradual change towards his feelings for Cas, his relationship to Sam (heavily influenced by the s7 events of this fic) and then his own relationship with himself were such slow burns that I felt it would be a disservice to try and cram a change like that into a timeline like “1 year”.

I felt like these subtle changes and adjustments actually felt a lot truer to life-- people often change in very small, gradual ways over time, even without realizing it and often times not consistently! If only we could all gain skills like the sims, where we can easily level up and remain at that high level of performance!

So the Guy Who Ate Satan, A Celestial Nuke that Developed Sentience, and Dean walk into a bar…

Sam’s story in Spn The Show has always been a ‘chosen one’ kind of narrative. Sam is living with one foot in the realm of the monsters, and I wanted to bring that back full force! It really makes sense for him that he should only continue to grow in power, might, and magic!! As the story progresses.

Cas also got a power up! I do desperately love in the show that he was kind of a grunt/nothing angel, and so even when he defected to TFW he was a huge help for them, but in the scale of things he was an annoying fly to most other angels. It really worked for the underdog story of s4/5. In this I wanted to give him a power up, and originally it was actually going to be close contact with Sam that eventually changed Cas into something unknown (you can still see traces of this in ch34 of TBAM, where Death remarks ‘Castiel could be [Sam’s] first creation’. But for a combo of reasons: how Sam’s magic needed to have intent, the entire concept of free will and consent, and how much I wanted Dean and Cas to have their effect on each other, I decided to go with the route that Cas has actually always been something angel-adjacent rather than becoming something new. TFW/Supernatural has always been about free will and making your own story, so I amplified that with Cas.

Dean has always been A Normal Guy, which is part of the appeal of him and Sam (2 normal dudes!) taking on the Very Not Normal. As explained above, Sam’s story is ‘normal guy finds out he’s the chosen one’ and so, in a story about very large concepts and huge monsters and acts of magic, I felt it was very important to keep Dean as normal as possible. To the point it became a running gag to me, personally, in that ‘no matter what cool shit happens around him, Dean has to stay as Just A Guy’. And it’s a very humanizing role that allows the story to have the scale it does!

What were the most important themes in your story?

Sam’s Autonomy

I wasn’t even going to include the plot about Lucifer’s death in this story— that was going to come up in a later story, actually! And rather than Sam having ate Lucifer, the original idea was that they’d become a SamandLucifer entity (this harkens back to a concept I wanted to write when Swan Song first aired).

That storyline would have involved a lot of mental ‘Sam and Lucifer discuss what it means to live, which one of them is more worthy of life and if they do deserve to destroy the world for the pain they’ve been forced to go through, just to create the dichotomy of good and evil for everyone else’ discussions. There would be a lot of talk about how Sam hates and fears Lucifer for the pain Lucifer put on Sam, how Lucifer hates Sam because he and Sam are the same but Sam’s brother loves him anyways, etc.

Ultimately that was scrapped because Sam’s entire story in the show is always about how the world and everyone around him manipulates him and that he never actually gets to make choices about his own life or body that aren’t influenced or part of someone elses’ design. And that always bothered me that Sam was never allowed to be himself without having to be ashamed of it, and I wanted to make sure that Sam’s triumph of being proud of himself/proudly choosing to exist (again) was evident in his story

In the end I needed Sam to have this visceral win over his tormentor. As the story shows, in this case Lucifer was abused and put into a position where he was incapable of empathy and could only express himself in violence. Sam even understands this! But it doesn’t change the fact that Lucifer tortured Sam in unimaginable ways for thousands of years.

With that in mind I didn’t like the idea of Lucifer and Sam having “co-ownership” of their new identity, so I made the choice that Sam had to be the survivor. This tied in well with Sam’s new crusade to restore free will to the universe, because he’s breaking the narrative of his own story!

While Castiel wasn’t a pov character, his own autonomy and free will was equally as important. You’ll note that many, many paragraphs and conversations revolved around that theme and that in the end Cas followed himself (and love!) which ensured his freedom of self <3

The Brothers are WEIRD PEOPLE!!!! And Codependent to a Worrying Degree, but It’s Also How They Survive

It’s very hard to show “unusual” relationships when you’re writing from the pov of the two people who don’t think there’s anything weird about their relationship. Sure, they say ‘yeah it’s probably weird that we still share a bed’ but that’s kinda more in line with ‘I had a nightmare and I want to be close to the person who makes me feel safe’. Hashtag normalize co-sleeping when you need it!!!

From there I did try to point out how the boys have a weird perception of lifestyle in the little things they did.

From thrifting everything from clothes to appliances to books (thrifting is a valid lifestyle! It’s incredibly handy when you’re on a budget.)

To never actually having condiments or knowing how to use a dishwasher cause they’ve lived in a car, a motel room, or squatted in old houses their whole life.

I tried to have them wear each others’ clothes or casually swap things as much as possible. They live out of each others’ pockets!

Also the brothers are just weird people!! It’s hard to show from their pov, cause they don’t know how far off from normal they are, but like…

Everything about Sam and Amelia was NOT right like holy shit those two were wilding in their grief. They are very lucky things worked out for them and that they got to be hashtag Weird Girls together

Dean explicitly, in the story, gets horny after killing stuff!! Violence has done a number on his psyche and he’s gotten some wires crossed that maybe shouldn’t have been, or maybe could be worked out in a safe space but… uh… how likely do we think Dean is gonna go find a safe space to deal with any of his shit???

LOVE!!! Love is truly what this whole story is all about

If you’ve read the stories, you know how much emphasis I put on love. Love is the strongest force in the Spn Universe! It’s what averted the apocalypse and saved the world (Swan Song), it’s what created free will (Cas’ entire arc!) I love love!!!!

I went out of my way to not put any definitions on platonic love vs romantic love because I think love is love is love and how you express that is the difference. Neither is more powerful than the other because LOVE is powerful!! Sam and Cas are the most important people in Dean’s life and he loves them equally! He shows this by giving Cas kisses and stealing Sam’s socks.

It’s a personal pet peeve of mine when I have to hear explanations like ‘I love you, like a brother’ or ‘I love you, but like, as a friend because I’m a lesbian and you’re a man’ etc etc in media. If you have to continuously define how your characters love each other, then I don’t think you’re doing a good job of portraying their relationship. So you’ll see that I never put those parameters in any conversation. Dean DOES muse that he loves Cas differently than he loves Sam or Bobby, specifically because there is a romantic and sexual tone that his feelings for Cas takes, but not because he loves Cas more or less than he loves Sam or Bobby.

Which means, if you haven’t realized it yet, the Series + Fic Titles are meant to be a complete sentence because the power of love IS the thesis of this series:

The Love It Takes To Exist Again (Sam’s journey!)

The Love It Takes To Become a Man (Dean’s journey!)

The Love It Takes To Destroy a Man (TBA)

And now for fun stuff. Behind the scenes!!

What’s Something People Probably Don’t Know?

The demonic fungal/hydrothermal vent growth on Sam’s arm was thrown in literally as I was posting the chapter because I had just finished a 48 hour cram session of writing a report on tube worms for an ecology class (I was chanting my tube worm song as I wrote it) and it ended up being a HUGE hit with both readers and myself. But it was so last minute I had trouble fitting it in more throughout the rest of Sam’s story!

Cas’ orders? That may or may not have bound him to Dean and removed his free will? Were written into Sam’s story and I went ‘oh SHIT that’s compelling’ and then left them there as a ‘guess I’ll figure that out when I get to Dean’s story lol’

Originally Dean and Cas were supposed to get together after having their souls bonded, and have been in a UST limbo the entire time before that. Mostly because I think the entire concept of ‘we just got married of the soul I guess we should try dating?’ is very funny. CLEARLY the two of them were way more eager to fall in love than I anticipated (thank you Cas for your honesty) but you can still see shades of this original idea here and there (especially in ch35 of TBAM)

I never intended Dean and Benny to connect so well!! Benny was going to reunite with Andrea, she was going to live, and they were going to go off into the world and leave the story. And, uh, here we are. I’m still debating if I need to adjust the relationship tag or not haha. Polyamory is fun, especially when I was planning for Sam to be the polyamorous brother...

Speaking of, I can’t believe I forgot about Sam and his sexuality! If I rewrote TEA I would have had Sam contemplate more on his lack of sexual appetite due to trauma, up until he meets Benny and he gets to rediscover how he wants to be a sexual person

Many of Sam and Dean’s absolutely stupid sibling conversations were lifted near-verbatim from conversations I’ve had with my siblings

And lastly...

Dem where’s Kevin????????????? Where is our sweet baby boy????????

He’s SAFE!! He’s in the Hunter pipeline somewhere cause Sam handed him off to Bobby’s people. He and his mom are safe and at some point they probably got rib sigils like SalmonDean did against angels, but for demons. I didn’t have room in this story for him!!! But my baby boy is SAFE and I want to get him back to university because it’s WHAT HE DESERVES!!!!

To that point: god there were/are SO many characters that I just didn’t include in the story so far because I didn’t feel comfortable including them without stalling the story for them. To that point: pretty much everyone who is alive/dead in s8 is that way in this story, except Bobby who gets to live.

[Check Out Part 2 for reader questions!]

#the love it takes series #to exist again fic #to become a man fic #dem speaks

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kitten1618x · 7 years

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GoT Afterthoughts 7x02 Stormborn (Jonsa Edition) -SPOILERS

Sorry for the delay guys - it’s been a busy day, and I like to do a re-watch and write-up while I’m watching it. So .... Wow! Quite an episode and this season feels so rushed and is moving a bit fast for my liking. I apologize in advance, because I know this is going to be loooong, and because it contains spoilers, I’m putting it under a cut. Read on Jonsa shippers -this was a GREAT ep. for us!

So, we begin with Dany in Dragonstone -can ya'll open a window, or throw down some decorative floral pillows OR something? That place is so dank and dreary despite how gorgeous it looks from the outside. Geez. No wonder Dany looks all Dark Lord Sith and shit. Which takes me to a great point I wanted to make last week but forgot -since her journey to Westeros, Dany has shed her white gowns to all black ensembles. Why? Could it be that they are trying to clue us into that fact that Dany is becoming darker? Well, duh! Her hair also seems to have taken on a much more silvery hue (although this could just be the makeup department finally getting it right) -but I think it has more to do with Dany embracing more of her darker Targ heritage.

She doesn't feel at home here (despite it being her actual home where she was born) -she hasn't really felt at home anywhere, and this will probably be true in the continuing narrative. Why? Because just like Daario said -she's a conqueror. She's not meant to settle down and rule in one spot -Dany's most happy when she's out and about conquering shit like the Dothraki (minus all that slave and rapey shit, because she's not down with that). Dany is onto the fact that the people of Westeros aren't exactly pleased with her arrival. She brings up her brother, implying that with her Dragons and army, she could easily take the 7 kingdoms -the usual "take it whether they like it or not" approach -until one of her advisors (Tyrion) convinces her otherwise. Ya'll see the pattern here? What would have happened all these times if she didn't have good people advising her along the way?

Varys lets her know that many of the houses already distrust Cersei, which leads Dany to creepily interrogate his loyalty. This seems odd to me because despite the fact that she's been traveling with Varys for however long it took to cross the great salt sea (I'm gonna guess at least a month) she decides that now is a great time to bring up that one time he tried to kill her and where his loyalties lie? And Varys (bless his heart) gives her the BEST answer ever!! HE'S LOYAL TO THE PEOPLE and as long as he has eyes, he'll use them (why isn't he on Jon's side????). She then threatens to burn him alive if he ever betrays her. A rather ominous choice of words, no? She could have chosen an array of ways she'd take him out (or just alluded to death, period) and yet she said BURN you alive. Nice. Kudos to Varys for holding onto his convictions -and did ya'll notice the deliberate shots to both GW and Missande's faces while Varys gave Dany this little speech about people becoming corrupt with power and abusing it, and the people are the ones who suffer for it? I wonder if the people surrounding Dany are starting to notice this darker side of her -Tyrion certainly has, as he looks visibly uncomfortable throughout this entire conversation.

GW interrupts to let them know they have a visitor. It's Melisandre who's come to align herself with yet another player. Girl changes King/Queens like underwear! I find it odd that she didn't mention that she raised Jon from the dead -wonder why she left that little detail out? Of course Dany is happy to know that she may be even more important than she already thought she was (*eyeroll*), and yet, Melisandre tells her that prophesies are tricky things -I took this as a no (just my personal opinion) although, Dany does seem to have a role in taking out the NK/WW (which I've mentioned many times already).

A few things I think were important to this scene:

Dany seemed jealous when they were talking about Jon - "he sounds like quite a man". The look on her face didn't exactly match up to what she'd said.

Varys still has a healthy skepticism of this religion -and I'm with him. How good is a religion that burns little girls alive? It reminds me of something the Red Priestess (with as many titles as Dany) back in Meereen said about burning non-believers. Couple that with Dany's mentality that her way is absolute, and they can make a dangerous combination if her moral compass gets skewed somehow. *cough*

Tyrion mentioning what an excellent judge of character he is REALLY struck a chord with me -could he be the "love" that betrays Dany? Could he jump sides when they see she's going down a dark path?

Dany is downright COLD throughout this entire scene. Her whole mannerism has changed -tone of voice, expressions, etc.

Now we're back to our beloved Winterfell (can we just stay here forever, please?). Jons received a raven from Tyrion -did it mention bending the knee? Jon and his TRUSTED advisers, Sansa and Davos are giving him council. He asks Sansa for her opinion. HE ASKS SANSA FOR HER OPINION. I think we can effectively bury Starkbowl and the sham it always was. It seems this invitation will be passed upon -for now.

I'm sure everyone picked up on the blatant Ned/Cat parallels in this scene -and we've all been chatting about them before the episode even aired, so I don't have much to say on this. One thing I DO want to mention is about Jon's hair. I've seen a few people say they don't like the half updo as much as the manbun. I think it always was a half updo -Kit's hair has just gotten longer, or/and they are deliberately trying to make him look more like Ned. Ser Davos brings up the Dragon fire defeating WW, and this thought popped into my head of all the (different) dragon fire sitting in casks below KL. I don't know why I thought of that, but I did.

We head to KL where Cersei is trying to rally the remaining houses behind her by shit talking Dany. She's not exactly lying, but she sure is fucking hypocritical, huh? Jamie's trying to sway Tarly to his side, and I think those who mentioned the Tarly's meeting their demise by Dany's hand were probably right.

From KL we jump to the Citadel where we see that Jorah's greyscale has spread up his entire arm and halfway across his chest and back, and they plan to ship him off to Valaryia with the Stone people. Sam remembers Stannis's daughter and wants to help, but is shut down. Jorah reveals himself to be a Mormont.

And we jump back to KL, and Cersei is strolling about the basement with Qyburn who reveals a giant crossbow crafted to take down Dany's Dragons. Shooting us back to Dany and her War Council aka: everyone who hates Cersei, and they want to take KL by force, but Dany using Tyrion's words from the previous night declares she doesn't want to be the Queen of Ashes, and they go over their battle plan. The fact that it's (queen of ashes) brought up TWICE in the episode gives me pause. Foreshadowing maybe? I dunno, but I also find it odd that within the same scene and in private conversation, Lady Olenna is telling Dany she is a dragon and she should be a dragon. Lady Olenna has nothing to lose anymore -she's in the game strictly for revenge against Cersei.

Missande and GW finally admit their feelings for one another and in a beautiful declaration of their newfound love, they make love -Jon Snow style (yesssssss). This was an extremely moving scene and really, Jacob's acting was so RAW and moving. I'm so scared for these precious babies because I don't think they will see each other again after this. My guess is that GW is going to die when the Unsullied take Casterly Rock.

We jump back to the Citadel where Sam is trying to persuade the Archmaestor to try and cure Jorah's greyscale, and when he gets shut down again, he takes matters into his own hands -with yet another extremely disgusting Sam at the Citadel scene. But yay for doing you, Sam! Hopefully he's successful in this venture -without acquiring greyscale himself. And poor, poor Jorah who has to sit through a layer of skin being removed with nothing but some rum and a belt to bite down on. It's looking to be a long night for the two of them.

We flash from a puss covered piece of greyscale to a gooey pot pie some dude is shoving his face with, in a Westeros tavern, and there sits MY BABY GIRL, Arya who reunites with Hot-motherfucking-Pie, ya'll!!! God, it's so nice to see Arya reunite with a friendly face for once! He gives her the scoop on the north -including the fact that her brother is now KitN and the look on her face nearly brings me to tears! When I watched this last night with my husband, I swear I screamed at the screen: GO HOME ARYA!! Of course, I knew that in typical Stark fashion that by the time she gets there, Jon would have already headed south. The only thing that can make up for that is a touching sister reunion between Arya and Sansa, and D&D better not disappoint!

Arya stuffs her face and says goodbye to her old friend -who makes a crack about how pretty she is, and my shipper heart screamed Gendry! Arya's definitely old enough for a romance now, but even if that's not in the cards, I just need to see those two reunite. Please. Maybe Gendry can sit on the IT (as Roberts heir) with Queen Arya by his side -uniting the north and south with Sansa and Jon ruling Winterfell --hey, a girl can dream right? Or write fanfiction. Anyway -Arya is going home!!!!

Speaking of home, we head back to Winterfell where King Jon is addressing the northern lords again after receiving the raven from Sam, telling him about the dragon glass under Dragonstone. He also reveals the message from Tyrion, then in a very dramatic fashion, turns to address Sansa directly -as if she's the only one in the room (that matters), and says that he's decided to accept the invitation.

Shocker: no one is happy about this. It wasn't what I would consider a revolt, but I'm worried for Jon. His hold on North will likely shatter once his parentage is revealed -especially if he bends the knee to Dany --which he better fucking NOT! The northerners try to dissuade him from leaving. Sansa reminds him about that one time where his one grandfather bbq'ed the other, way back in the day. She thinks it's a trap. She accuses him of abandoning their home and his people (ahem, HER). Cue a moving speech from Jon about his loyalty to the North. Jon is CLEARLY only doing this for the dragon glass, and possibly some allies for the coming WW army -this is all he's worried about because Jon wants to keep everyone safe. And you know what? I believe him. His "Ned Stark" honor and loyalty are everything to him -he won't betray the north.

And then one of the most important moments for these two -whether you ship them or not: he leaves Sansa in charge to rule as regent in his absence. Do you all know how fucking important this is??? He just validated the shit out of her! This speaks volumes about the love and trust he has for her. She's not a "stupid girl", she's clever and strong and the only person he would trust to hold down the fort while he's gone. That's huge guys! Huge!!! And the look on her face -damn guys, just damn. It's all "wait, what?" ...how good it must feel to know someone places their utmost trust in you. "Would that be so terrible?" -ummm, apparently not.

Now before I move on to my favorite scene of this entire episode, a few things I want to point out that I think were relevant here.

The look that passes between Sansa and LF after Sansa receives the news she’s the future (upon Jon’s departure) QitN (and I got an ask about this, so I specifically want to address this): LF has that smug satisfied smirk, because this is exactly what he's wanted -Jon to leave so he can weasel in closer to Sansa, and what's better? Jon's just placed all the power in her hands -of course he's already scheming ways to drive a wedge between them and manipulate Sansa into doing what he wants. But you see, Sansa is already on to him you guys. Hasn't that been pretty obvious? If there's any truth to a Starkbowl, I'd say it's a farce so Sansa can take down LF once and for all. And the look she gave to LF seemed one of worry to me, tbh. As if she already knew his beady eyes were on her.

"Yours. You are my sister and the only Stark in the north." - I'm going to address this in a minute, just wanted to draw your attention to it here.

Now, my favorite scene of the night (and possibly the entire fucking series, because Kit Harington is dead sexy when he's in beast mode)! Jon’s down in the Stark crypts, paying homage to his "father" before he rides away from Winterfell, and in slinks Dick Dastardly (shouldn't he be off trying to kidnap Penelope Pittstop?) Sorry guys, I'm a 90's chick -old reference -Google Wacky Races if you're curious. ** What I took away from this scene: LF was feeling Jon out (it's what he does), deliberately poking the bear to see what triggered him so he could use it against him later. He tried everything -bagging on Jon's bastard status, Catelyn's resentment of him, the fact that the BotB was literally lost without his aid, etc. I'm pretty sure Jon was on to the fact that he was purposely trying to goad his anger, and was clearly very dismissive of him, as he walked away.

Now, here's where it gets tricky ... when LF mentioned Sansa, I don't think he expected Jon to react the way he did. Like, I think he expected anger -sure, but not full-on murderous rage! And that's exactly what he got! Jon fucking snarled ffs! He was visibly shaking and seething with anger, and he choked out LF for a good 60 seconds or more, trembling in rage before he spoke his very menacing threat.

"Touch my sister, and I'll kill you myself."

Interesting choice of words. Touch.

Not hurt or harm, not "if you go near", but touch. Very interesting, indeed.

"I love Sansa"

*Jon twitches his head (shaking it off, keep cool man, you know what he's doing -he's just trying to push your buttons).

"I love her as I loved her mother"

*Jon snarls and whirls around in a rage he cannot contain.

Now, as I mentioned above -the whole "sister" reference. This was very deliberate on the writers part in both scenes, but not for the reason that a lot of you are now frantically worrying for our ship. Was Jon acting the part of big brother protecting his sister? Of course. But is that all? Umm no, I don't think so. Not when you couple that with the fact that the only two times we've seen Jon lose complete control of his emotions -it was attached to Sansa Stark.

It seems very telling to me that they'd want Jon to reference Sansa as his sister in this episode -but why? Well, because methinks Jon doth protest too much, to put it as simply as possible. I mean, come on -they're brother and sister, and Jon can't be acting like a murderous jealous lover -yet. Or, can he? Sure -if they blur the lines just enough.

Put it this way: they are toying with us. They planted this Jonsa seed last season -clearly, as even non-shippers noticed it, and now it's time to pull back a little bit because Jonsa is never going to happen in season 7 while both of them still believe to be siblings (and how convenient that Bran is probably on his way to Winterfell and now Jon is gone). Plus, as much as the majority of you don't want to hear or accept it, Jon is probably gonna put the wood to Dany. It fucking sucks. It does, I know. But it's the big fan-service they've been building on for years -the ‘fake’ song of ice (Jon) and fire (Dany). But, I've said it before, and I'll continue to repeat it until I'm blue in the face: please consider the context of their coupling, and not the act in itself.

Okay, back to the episode: Jon struts out of the crypts like a boss, and mounts his horse. He glances up at Sansa who's waiting to watch him depart Winterfell, and they exchange this sad little wave. I'm sure most of you have already drawn the same conclusion: this was the Jamie/Brienne parallel - two people who care deeply for each other, but conflicts of interest are keeping them apart. (Ahem, siblings!!!!!!)

Now, I know that so many of you were hoping for a tearful goodbye, but they just aren't going to do that. Why? Because they want to hurt us. Why? Because it's all about those romance tropes. Pulling the couple apart and then throwing them back together. If they give us a terribly unsatisfying goodbye, it only serves to make the reunion all the more sweeter. I write you guys -I'm a writer. I'm not saying this to toot my own horn, I'm simply sharing with you the very same tactics I use to hurt my readers. It's angst 101 in a slow burn romance.

So again, I implore you all to take a collective chill, find your zen and patiently bide your time for season 8-that's our season, ya'll!!

Okay, back to the show! Now we are back with Arya who's set up camp for the night, and she comes face to face with Nymeria! She pleads with her to return to Winterfell with her, but Nymeria turns away, taking her pack with her. Arya looks heartbroken (and breaks my heart in the process) -muttering, "that's not you", in reference to Ned saying that to her once in regards to forcing her to be something she's not. Nymeria isn't domesticated anymore. She's wild and free. So bittersweet. Go home Arya, I'm so ready for a Stark reunion!

We end the episode on Yara's boat, with some Iron-Sand sex about to take place, when the Dread Pirate Euron literally drops in on them. Yara puts up a heroic fight, but two of the Sand snakes are killed, while the other two are taken hostage -my guess is to be presented as a "gift" to Cersei for murdering Marsella. Heartbreakingly, Theon has a serious bout of PTSD and jumps overboard instead of fighting Euron to save Yara. I hope Yara survives so she can tell Theon she understands why he did that -it's clear she loves her little brother very much.

And there we have it. Is it Sunday yet?

Remember Jonsa shippers: collective chill and find your zen. Season 8 is ours and Jonsa is endgame. My inbox is open if you need me.

#jonsa #jon x sansa #jonsa meta #spoilers #s7 #got afterthoughts

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soldierwinterthe · 7 years

Text

Can’t Kill You If You’re Already Dead (Part One)

Summary: You are an agent of SHIELD, and you're “more than a friend” of Steve Rogers. During the events of Winter Soldier, Steve discovers that you were to know the identity of the Winter Soldier for a long time. Finally, you tell him the truth.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader, Bucky Barnes x Reader (friendship)

Other characters: Natasha Romanoff, Nick Fury, Maria Hill.

Warnings: Angst, mention of fight

Words Count: 2613

Author’s Note: I love so much Marvel Cinematic Universal, and I love so much Steve Rogers/Captain America (and Chris Evans too lol) Hope you like it!

Feedback is always appreciated.

I am an agent of SHIELD, recruited by Nick Fury himself, during the nineties. But I'm not an agent like everyone else: I am a super-soldier.

The HYDRA kidnapped me in the forties, when a twenty year old. I was doing volunteer work during the war, helping wounded soldiers. That day my life changed completely. The HYDRA did experiments on me, on my body, on my mind. They have caused permanent changes... they released the latent powers: telekinesis (mental capacity to move and control objects with the power of thought, also very heavy); telepathy (the ability to create a connection between people's minds, altering the memories, project illusions).

I spent years and years alone, until one day the cell next to mine, always remained empty from your arrival, is occupied by someone. A man, I learned about slowly, and he began to know me, to become almost a single person. In the worst moments I was there for him, and he was there for me.

At first, my torturers used the electric chair, and other methods of torture. Then they began by washing the mind. Soon they discovered that had no effect on me, because of my powers, which created a sort of mental shield, which they couldn’t cross. So they decided to try to brainwash on my friend; everything changed.

The more time passed, the more he was different; I tried to continue to remind him who he really was, to tell his story, we've been through. But eventually he became a puppet HYDRA: when they wanted to kill, he killed. When they didn’t need him, they hibernated him. And when he looked at me before he left, he couldn’t see the friend of the past, what was at his side in the dark nights; for him I was only a prisoner of HYDRA, who not obeyed.

They thought to hibernate me too early, to keep my appearance, beautiful and young, but soon discovered another consequence of my powers: not grew older. They didn’t understand, and I didn’t understand it myself, if aging was only slowed down, or stopped altogether.

I escaped in 1985 during a mission, I was able to rebel and to escape; I didn’t look behind me even once, even though I thought, and thought, my friend, how I was abandoned, despite its radical change.

I met him again a few years later, in Russia, by chance alone. I tried to convince him to come with me, to escape from HYDRA, as I did, to always stay together, to help each other. Maybe we could find a way to fight the men who had tortured us. Nothing, for him I was nobody, only a rebel fled to the mane of his 'masters'; He tried to bring me back. I escaped. He fired me.

During the escape, I promised myself that I would have helped him come to himself; He would return my one-time friend.

Nick Fury recruited me years after that; He knew who I was and what had happened to me, but he never asked me about my friend; I didn’t know if he knew about it or not.

He convinced me to join his "agency", SHIELD, even though I was very skeptical at first. The only agency that I knew I had locked up for years. But at SHIELD it was not bad: with other agents, such as Black Widow, Clint Barton, Maria Hill, have become skilled in close combat, and now have to use any type of weapon, though much more often use my powers, that in time I learned to better control.

Fury trusts me so much that he spoke me of the project "Avengers", an elite group of superheroes chosen by him personally: Tony Stark, philanthropist, billionaire, with almost superhuman intelligence, better known as Iron Man; Thor, god of thunder, son of Odin, from another world; Bruce Banner, and his alter ego Hulk, 'born' as a result of an experiment with gamma radiation went bad; and finally Steve Rogers, aka Captain America, who defeated the Red Skull, head of HYDRA, during World War II; He was believed to be dead, but Fury found him in the North Pole glaciers, hibernating. I’m taken part in the project, and helped the Avengers at the Battle of New York, against Chitauri and Loki.

After the battle, everyone returned to their lives and their worlds; I went back to being a simple agent, participating in new missions, but with a new partner by my side: Steve Rogers. Between him and me she was born... something. I can't explain it, but I saw him as a beacon of hope, the light that was missing for a long time inside my heart. The only problem was that I hadn't told him the truth about me, about HYDRA, and about.. him.

Steve and I were not just a couple genuine, but almost always went out together, take me anywhere I wanted on his motorbike; to the movies, to the luna-park, to the sea, eat ice cream together, or simply we remained at home, or his, or mine, and sat on the couch, talking, exchanging a few kisses: nothing more, something simple. Our life was almost back to normal. But nothing lasts forever.

Everything is changed. Somebody killed Nick Fury.

"Tell me about the shooter.", says Natasha, his voice trembling. Nick Fury was severely wounded, while he was at Steve's house. I received your call while I was in the shower, and I rushed to the hospital. Nat is very tied to Fury; more than me probably.

"He's fast. Strong. Had a metal arm."

I turn my eyes toward Steve, impressed by his description of the man who tried to kill Fury. I try not to show it to anyone, but my face is a look of pure horror; they have awakened him. And that means that you are approaching the moment when I'll have to tell Steve the truth.

The seconds pass, and then the minutes pass, and Fury of the heart begins to slow down, he loses more beats, until it stops completely.

Nick Fury is dead.

Of all the worst things that could happen, this is terrible: before the death of Fury, SHIELD is compromised, and the HYDRA is in control. Almost they killed me and Steve, an ambush in the elevator of Triskelion, the base of SHIELD.

Steve and I to get away we had to jump into the void, impacting with the asphalt of the road; thank god Steve had his shield, which minimized the damage.

Now we all wanted: Hill, Romanoff, Captain America, and me.

"I know who killed Fury", these are the exact words that come from the lips of Natasha. If she knows who it was, he must have met him. But she really knows who is hiding behind the mask? I do not think she would have said now to Steve.. but I should tell; but not now. Now we are all in danger, we have to get away. Nat begins to tell his story, or at least what little she knows.

"He has over two dozen murders in the last fifty years. Most intelligence does not believe in its existence. Those who believe in it, they call it.."

"..The Winter Soldier." I say, shifting the focus on me, Steve with a confused look.

"Do you know who he is?" he asks. Now, I have to talk about it.. but because I can’t? I look down, disappointed by myself.

"I heard about it; I thought of him when you spoke of the metal arm, but.. I wasn’t sure."

"How do we find him?"

"You can’t find him.." I say, as I think back to the last time I saw him, "...he finds you."

Wheaton, New Jersey.

It's where Steve had joined as a soldier in the forties, before.. Well, Captain America. The pen-drive that Nick Fury has left to Steve before he died, it’s here that took us. We found a hiding place, where there was inside a massive quantity of information, connected to a computer, then discovered to be the diseased mind of Dr. Zola, who flanked Red Skull during World War II. He's told us the truth: the HYDRA has infiltrated into SHIELD since the agency's born and they are "dormant" remained all these years, and now they want to eliminate all those who threaten their plans.

Captain America will not allow it. I will not allow it.

Insight, the plan of attack HYDRA: Helicarrier with technology to eliminate anyone who wants the HYDRA, will be active in the sky in a few hours. We must return to the Triskelion, and stop everything. While I, Steve and Natasha we drive, I try to talk to Steve. Will it hurt to remember everything that happened to me, all I was trying to forget; the pain, the tears, the 'grieving' for my friend. But I can’t lie anymore, not Steve: he trusts me.

I don’t have time to say a single word, that something attacks. Someone attacks us: The Winter Soldier. I get thrown away, and with me also Nat. When I open my eyes, the right leg of Romanoff is locked under the debris; with my powers, I lift the rocks and move them away. I help Nat to get up and settle in a safer place, since with his injured leg she can’t fight. I return to the streets to help Steve, which meanwhile recovered his shield and he is fighting against the mysterious soldier.

His face covered with his usual mask, makes sure that Steve will not recognize it. Not yet, anyway. With a flick, the mask of the soldier flies away, and when he looks up, Steve can0t believe it: in front of him is really his old friend, Bucky Burnes, believed dead during the battle against the Red Skull

"Bucky?"

"Who the hell is Bucky?"

As I imagined, he does not remember; HYDRA has made the once brainwashed; they do it every time you wake him, before to send him on a mission to prevent remembered something. The Soldier does not give weight to the words of Steve, and after taking a knife, try to launch it toward him, when I approach more of them, and with my power, throw away the knife, and then have it in my hands.

"Soldier!" I yell at him, turning his eyes to look at me.

"You? I thought you were dead." says the Winter Soldier. As I would be happy to meet him again, to hug him; but I know that he does not remember anything.

"You don’t want to kill him. He is your friend, you must remember." I try once again to make it sobering, and for a second it seems that his eyes soften, trying to remember something, a memory minimal as it was before. But before he can help him, a grenade flies towards him. When explosion smoke disappears, he's gone. He disappeared like a ghost.

We’re arrested by HYDRA. I can’t use my powers, because of some special handcuffs, of which I had no idea existed. Directed to the Triskelion, we never arrived. To save us was Maria Hill, who has hidden there in a top secret place, that not even the HYDRA knows. One of Fury bunkers. And inside there's just Nick Fury, lying in a bed, alive and kicking.

"I saw the operation. Your heart stopped beating." says Natasha while a doctor cures the leg.

"A medicine created by Banner for stress. On him it didn’t work; we used it ourselves. It slows down the beat up to one minute."

"Why all the secrecy? Why don’t you tell us?” Steve is talking this time. All the way, he didn’t deign to look at me, didn’t mention me. It's right, how stupid I extended the lies, and I made a mistake.

"It had to look real."

"Can’t kill you if you're already dead." I think aloud. Everyone turns towards me, as if they had forgotten my presence. Steve has his eyes on me, his face exudes.. don’t hate, but disappointment. He takes a deep breath, hands on waist.

Then he goes away. A few seconds, a little 'courage, and I follow him. It's time to tell him the truth.

"Steve.." I call him; he is leaning the scaffold of the bridge on which we find ourselves.

“You knew from the beginning that he was Bucky?" he asks, looking at the emptiness below us. I don’t answer: he already knows the answer.

"Why don’t you tell me?"

"It's a long story.. and it’s difficult to explain."

Steve turns to me, and approaches to me. Look straight in my eyes C/O, and I look into his, as blue as the sky, like the light of hope that he is for me.

"I want the truth."

A lump in my throat. I never told anyone what happened to me, in the HYDRA’s laboratories, even Fury, though he knew something. Despite what's between me and Steve, I.. I was afraid, that after my story, he saw me as a weak person. But don’t tell him the truth has led me to this, and I don’t want to lose him. I'm tired of losing the people I love. I have only one way to put things right with him. I take a deep breath and start talking.

"I was born in the twenties. I was a normal girl, with a normal family. I went to school, then I went to college; I've always wanted to do, however, it was to help people, so I started to do volunteer work. But one day.. I was kidnapped by several men. They were locked me. They have tortured me.." the words out of my lips trembling; I try as much as possible to hold back the tears, and I continue.

"They made sure that my latent powers come out in the sunlight. I was always alone in that miserable cell, until one day someone else locked him in the cell next to mine. The walls were transparent, so I could see him, and even found a way to speak, thanks to my powers; Bucky his name was. Although they had imprisoned him, despite his arm amputee.. on his face there was always a smile. He smiled for him, he smiled to me; it was the only thing, the only time when we forgot what they were doing to us. Then the HYDRA began with brainwashing; first on me, and when they found that didn’t work, they began with him. I could hear his screams, in my mind, roared so loud, and I couldn’t get them to stop. I was afraid.. more of his screams, that of mine.. it was no more Bucky, my friend. I tried to bring him back to reality, but the more time passed, the more he forgot. Until not remember what I was for him."

I start to cry, I can no longer resist. Steve approaches me and pulls me into his arms. I feel his perfume mixing with mine.

"I promise that I would have saved Steve. He is the only one who has helped me in all those years. I owe him."

Steve approach his lips to mine, and kissed me.

A chaste kiss; He leans his forehead to mine, and fixed his eyes on mine. "We will save him. We will save Bucky."

Part Two

Tag: @hotwinchester - @doro7winchester - @iamthenewthor - @deadinside-muser

If you want to be tagged in my stories, just ask me.

#fanfic #marvel #captain america #the winter soldier #bucky barnes #steve rogers #imagine marvel #marvel imagine #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction #steve rogers imagine #imagine steve rogers #captain america imagine #imagine captain america #steve rogers x reader #captain america x reader #can't kill you if you're already dead

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tumblunni · 7 years

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ANYWAY! I’mma gonna talk about my playthru of Digimon World Next Order, to distract me from the fact i’m rapidly approaching the ending and have to wait to sate my JRPG tastes on Persona 5 afterwards...

* it is really really REALLY REALLY really REALLy great to finally be able to play a game in the DW series as a female character. Holy SHIT, man this is overdue! And it isnt handled awfully like in Cyber Sleuth where everyone constantly calls you male and the character design is really oversexualized and doing weirdass poses for everything. There’s still a lil bit of ‘cliche girly option traits’ but seriously she’s like the least stereotyped design we’ve had in the games since Dusk and Dawn! She gets to wear SHORTS and A HOODIE! A hoodie that has an inexplicable hole in the back for some reason, but whatever! xD Also I actually like her version of the Protagonist Hair better, even tho I think its lame they colour coded them in the ol cliche genderedness. Boy character just has one streak of coloured hair at the front, but girl has a spiralling streak on the end of her ponytail that looks like a punk poison sort of fashion~! And it leaks pixels when she runs, and has a really nice glow effect that kinda makes it draw patterns as you swing her model around. Makes me wanna run in circlesssss~ Her dubbed voice is a bit boring cliche anime love interest tho, a bit squeaky after you’ve been hearing it for hours. But the dude is Like Every Shonen Hero Voice Ever, so i think its meant to be intentionally generic for both of them. I could swear he’s voiced by a bad Tai impersonator! XD Also I’m just kinda thankful cos every other girl in the plot gets a REALLY squeaky unbearable english voice, thank god protagonist is spared...

* its a lil bit of funnyness tho that for some reason the skill list is the only place where the translators forgot about the protagonist options. Like.. a LOT of Tamer Skills are weirdly gendered when it would have taken five seconds to change that. Why does it have to be stuff like ‘Cooking Boy’ and ‘Cooking Man’ instead of basic and advanced cooking? Especially cos the other one in between is called Gourmet Cooking...

* I love forever that so many of the virus type recruitable digimon are sweethearts of hugs and joy. Now THAT reminds me of the original Digimon World! Seriously I am SO GLAD that Literally The Same Myotismon has a sidequest about rescuing his precious myobrella so he won’t faint in the sun. or like.. if its not the same Myotismon then MAN he would totally be a great ship with the other equally helpless one in the first game XD He has a nice new function as a townsperson, instead of just being ‘a manager’ in the colloseum and never even being a fight. (That annoyed me as a kid! He just stands there!) Now he runs the card gallery, cos you collect ‘antique cards’ in this game and he restores them with his painting skillz. its a nice lil in-joke cos they’re all the original first trading card artworks from waaaaay back in the first season! And Piedmon is in this one too, yay! He’s actually like the only morally dubious virus type AT ALL, he talks like a cliche mwahaha mad scientist even as he does nothing particularly evil. His sidequest is a funny thing of playing hide and seek and he sucks at it. While yelling hammily about being an evil genius! And then he has quite a useful function in the town, he does a random effect on you once per day with his evil science, and it could be good or it could be bad, but if its bad he actually pays you compensation money for it! EVEN THE EVIL GUY IS TOO KIND And OH MAN I am so happy and sad for Skullgreymon! A good guy skullgreymon was always one of my ideas for a DW fangame, im so happy it happened for real! In this game Skullgreymon is a fashion designer with low self confidence, and you recruit them by finding weregarurumon who’s their biggest fan and becomes their first friend. Its so sweet! They never actually interact once you recruit them both tho, cos they work at different parts of the town. But im still gonna assume they keep in touch! Its also a shame skullgreymon doesnt actually run a fashion shop, cos there actually WAS a fashion shop in Digimon World Redigitize aka the one damn game we’ll never see dubbed T_T Instead skullgreymon gets this kinda depressing role of just standing around outside the entertainment area saying ‘i wish i could work with children but they’re always scared of me’, and then if you bring a newly hatched digimon to see them then they gain bonus stats from being terrified somehow?? NOOO WHERE IS THE OPTION TO TEACH MY CHILDREN THAT SKULLY IS A FRIEND

* Anyway, my main digimon are (still) Hershey and Zephyr, and I love them! I’m still working on hoping to eventually get the full terriermon and lopmon canon digivolution lines with them, wow its hard. But I adore them no matter what form they take at the moment! I ended up loving them so much that i never raised any other digimon ever. i just rename them the same name every time they reincarnate, and pick the same eggs! I’ve gotten close to unlocking every single variation of the bunno brothers evo lines!! But it IS getting really annoying that you have to type the name manually every time, why no option to just stick with the previous name? DW1 had that and it was on way worse hardware! Oh, and its funny that I started off calling them the bunny brothers cos thats what they were in adventure 02, but then after playing the game for ages I’ve settled on headcanoning hershey as female and zephyr as nonbinary. And also I started off with the cliche personalities of sassy rebel terriermon and stoic lopmon like in Tamers, but Hershey ended up being the rebel instead and Zephyr is like a shonen hero cinnamon roll! They’re both equally sassy and eccentric tho XD I’m not quite sure yet what would be their ‘canon’ final mega forms that I wanna keep them in for the final boss and stuff. But hershey’s made me regain my appreciation of Ladydevimon after I stopped liking her as soon as I grew old enough to understand that most of her fans only liked her for being ‘a stripper’ :P Like.. she’s a really damn good design even without the fanservice?? I like her way more than devimon, myotismon and etc, I wish she’d gotten to be a major villain! i mean it sucks that devimon got to be one when she’s literally his evolved form. (And yes I am happy that it continues to be canon that ladydevimon can digivolve from devimon and the same for angewomon and angemon. DIGIMON AINT RESTRAINED BY HUMAN GENDER ROLES YO) So yeah anyway, I kinda headcanon Hershey as a hypothetical less skimpy redesign of LadyDevimon? or like.. if she got her own unique Mega form that kept a similar design, rather than just being retconned into lilithmon and rosemon’s evo lines. I just don’t think the skimpyness fits with Hershey’s personality but the rest of the design just has such a cool piratey thiefy type look?? And she’s like THE BEST monster girl in the franchise, she’s the only one who really gets to be monstery looking, even if she’s still an hourglass figure sex object. i mean i always thought it was meant to be a subversion of that?? She has that giant monster claw hand and is really vicious and powerful in battle! All her animations in the game are her shredding things with it and doing the classic dracula rise-from-the-grave when she’s knocked out, and just... ITS REALLY BADASS!! I didnt know how cool a fight with her could be, cos she just got that stupid ass fanservice joke slap fight in the anime... ANYWAY Ladydevimon is good I appreciate her I like her even though she’s in the general genre of fanservice digimon that I dislike. She’s like the one single one I dont hate! (Tho I still wish we had more than like.. two un-fanservice female digimon in the entire damn series) Buuuut I dont think her design quite fits Hershey even though she’s the digivolution I keep using ingame. Maybe if I can find a different Mega that I prefer, and make up a fanmade digivolution line? or I could do a fanart variation of the digimon...

* ANYWAY I kinda ended up headcanoning Hershey as a former member of the broken apart pirate crew in Mod Cape. Cos like.. what if your digimon had backstories of what their life was like before they met you! like Gatomon in Adventure, they were chosen to be partners to a destined hero but had to wait so long they’d become disillusioned. Cos when you meet em at the start of the game they’re mega level and only get poofed back into eggs cos of machinedramon’s attack. WHAT LIFE DID YOU LEAD WITHOUT ME. I AM HERE TO PROTECT YOU NOW AAAAAAA!! So yeah it would be cool to headcanon Hershey as a former highway bandit type character who has trouble adjusting to living in a city surrounded by happy innocent people and hugs. I dont see her as grumpy tho.. like, she’s kind of a bombastic trickster archetype but she’s still super cynical and ‘I only care about myself, anything else gets you hurt’. I was thinking maybe if I designed a fanmade mega for her she could be like a magician pirate zombie demon??? Like.. yknow piedmon is a deck of cards clown guy with those four daggers? i actually got Piedmon as her digivolution when she was a Ladydevimon and I was thinking MAN it could be so cool if we had like a zany zombie digimon who attacks by stabbing a sword through her own back! Like ‘watch me saw a woman in half’ XD A design where she has a load of weapons stuck in her and uses them to fight with! like how mummymon is a mummy + soldier in a leg brace design, hypothetical zombiemon could be a zombie + actual tragic assassination victim. Plus a magician. Or a clown. And ladydevimon. And a pirate. LOOK I JUST HAVE A LOT OF MUTUALLY CONTRADICTORY HEADCANONS OKAY xD

* I don’t really have as much development ideas for Zephyr yet, aside from that they’re Hershey’s more cheerful and positive sibling. But I see them as also being kinda creepy and battle-hungry and stuff? Like.. both these twins are total virus types, clown type, typical final villain type of acrobatic doom! And both are good guys deep down. But Zephyr is a more cinnamon roll type of good and Hershey is grumpy unwillingly dragged into goodness. And like.. Zephyr is a bit dotty and only accidentally creepy, not really understanding how to socialize properly. And probably they would be like ‘NO BIG SISTER, STEALING IS BAD’ *currently stabbing a guy* I think maybe my headcanon for Zeph might be that they were for some reason left completely alone while waiting for the protagonist? Hershey at least found some companionship with the pirates, even if she became super bitter after the team broke up. I think Zeph maybe started off as a wild forest mon that’d even forgotten how to speak, until by pure chance they bumped into their long lost twin sister and then met the protagonist. So like an innocent angel who’s all new to the city and excited about everything, but also kinda fighty and dangerous because of the same stuff that makes them innocent. I dunno, I might make them an angewomon or ophanimon to match with Hershey? Tho I wanted to make them both good guy virus types, it could be an equally interesting contrast to have a vicious battle-obsessed angel who’s the absolute opposite of softspoken fancyness! And I also kinda associate them with the colour green even though I ended up picking a grey themed digivolution for Hershey instead. But all of Terriermon’s natural digivolutions are all machiney and don’t suit this personality as much... I dunno, maybe I could make up another headcanon/variant type thing? Cos after all lopmon’s line gets two champion level forms and two megas but terriermon only has two recolours for the same ultimate level. Maybe even it out, lol! Or like, I’m thinking like.. what if Terriermon had a mega that suited Henry more? i was reading someone’s review where they said it was weird that pacifistic Henry got a giant robot specializing in attack while Rika got the humanoid pacifist digimon. And yeah, that IS totally weird! And it got me imagining what if Terriermon got a humanoid digivolution that was like a martial artist?? or maybe like a speedy superhero lookin armour thing! Like just a more humanoid rapidmon! or I dunno maybe if puppetmon is in this game then zephyr could be puppetmon. I miss puppetmon. puppetmon never got to be in ANY games except dusk and dawn! I WANNA SEE A 3D PUPPETMON YO!!

* Man I just spent this entire post rambling my headcanons for silent protagonist characters instead of actually talking about the game... aaaa...

#bunni plays next order

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stetervault · 7 years

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Do you have any recommendations were Stiles and Peter get married?

I do! Here’s a bunch - there’s arranged marriage, fake marriage, getting married, and married life.

I’ll Meet You Here by predictaslash

But Stiles can’t really savor it as much as he would like mostly because his heart feels like it might start hurting soon. “Oh. OH. You were joking. Me, too, heh. What a jokester I am.”

AKA, An Entirely Too Decent Proposal

stone/sponge by 1001cranes

Peter has a taste for the all-consuming; he doesn’t find it at all strange to be in the minor percentage of werewolves who have mates.

A welcome arrow by 1001cranes

The wedding is small and grim, because Stiles is being carted off to parts unknown, married to a thirty-something year old dude who wants to marry a seventeen year old dude - totally not creepy at all.

i can’t make you love me by nezstorm

She agreed to it. Of course she did.

She couldn’t imagine saying no when it was her mother’s life on the line.

A Matter of Chance by 1001cranes

“I’m going to offer for the Stilinski boy,” Peter announces at breakfast one morning.

Greenberg drops the entire pot of hot chocolate.

Anchor by ladyoneill

After the sacrifice and committing to becoming Scott’s Emissary, Stiles begins to suffer the effects of the Nemeton to the point that it becomes so dangerous he needs a physical and emotional anchor or he might just destroy the world. It has to be a werewolf, more importantly one with the age and experience to help him control his wild emotions and bring him back into balance. There’s really only one choice.

Of old beasts and new gods by ToyBoxOfSuz

Peter Hale is a warlord who rebelled and conquered the Stilinski Kingdom. He demands to be wed to the crownprince: Stiles Stilinski and become the king. After five years of war… Stiles accepts.

Sometimes You Get So Lonely by GiggleSnortBangDead

Peter’s nineteen when he’s engaged to an infant.

you and me are the lucky ones by Sang_argente

“Alpha McCall, it seems like there’s only one way to settle this alliance then.”

“You’re right,” Scott replied. “Stiles and Peter will tie our packs by marriage.”

“Wonderful. Shall we set the wedding for this time next month?” Talia asked.

“Agreed.”

If you want a partner (take my hand) by WritersAreLiars

Peter is fifteen years old when he is offered up to solidify the Hale-Stilinski alliance. He’ll need to wait sixteen more before his promised will be of an age to wed.

The Husbands Hoax by veterization

Stiles and Peter pretend to be married For Survival.

Mates, Apparently by migratoryslashfan

Peter has something very important to tell Stiles.

Supreme Marriage Plan by RebaK1tten

Love Wins by Kkaepsongiya

They laid there for a while, wrapped around each other and lazily kissing as they enjoyed their new relationship status. Stiles admired the addition to his ring finger, loving the added weight. He was going to get married to the love of his life.

And now, nobody could stop them.

Skin Memories by Mysenia

Peter loves Stiles’ hands but most especially his left one.

Peter and Stiles Are Getting Married by Guede

The wedding is actually not the main event here. Or, Lydia is planning that, obviously, but…pretty much everybody else has plans, too. Including Stiles and Peter.

In Sheep’s Clothing by Twisted_Mind

“The problem is Derek,” he began.

Cora snorted in a particularly unladylike fashion. “When isn’t it?”

He turned serious eyes on her. “Unfortunately, in this case, Derek has also caused trouble for our family, as well as young Miss Stilinski.”

At that, Cora’s features sharpened, and she leaned forward. “What’s he done now, and what do we need to do about it?”

Peter huffed. “He bedded his intended, and if he had merely done so, we’d have precious little trouble on our hands, for he’s hardly the first to take his wife-to-be to bed before the wedding.”

“I’m not going to like what I hear next, am I?”

“You’re going to positively hate it.“

The Marriage of Stiles Stilinski and Peter Hale by Triangulum

Stiles thinks of those blue eyes of his, thinks of the possibility of him hunting down the two hunters, of shredding them. She has no doubt in her mind.

“I am not in danger from him. I want this,” Stiles says.

Her father sighs and she knows he’s given in. She will not be married to Derek Hale, but to Peter.

A horribly historically inaccurate AU where Stiles is betrothed to Derek Hale, but meets his uncle Peter…

When It All Falls Apart by Peter Hale (SebastianVael)

Stiles doesn’t know what to do.

He’s on the verge of losing everything in the divorce, on the verge of breaking down. He hates himself, hates what he is, what he’s not. He has no husband, no alpha, no mate. He’s about to lose his mind, and he has no hope.

His mother used to tell him; when you’ve hit rock bottom, the only way out is up. But what’s the point in trying to climb out of Hell, when the Devil’s waiting for you with an army of lawyers?

And with his heat just around the corner, Stiles doesn’t think he has anything left to give. He needs a miracle.

He just didn’t figure his miracle would wear Alexander Amosu and fight his battles with a smirk that could kick-start the apocalypse.

Flickers Between Radio Silence by mia6363

Talia,” Peter spoke without taking his eyes off his niece, “I’ll do it. I doubt it matters to them who the candidate is. Any warm body should do.”

Snowy Scales by TriscuitsandSoup

A merman and a snowstorm was a strange combination, but somehow they just seemed to work.

A Not Very by the Book Wedding by LadyArinn

Peter and Stiles get married, and it goes as well as it can. There’s only a little crying.

Proposing To Strangers by moonstalker24

At the end of a strained relationship, crime novelist Stiles chooses to hide from the world inside a bar with far too many motorcycles outside it for comfort. Here he’ll meet the man of his dreams, eat food and propose marriage, all within the first five minutes.

Peter doesn’t know who this kid is, but he’s cute and looks like he could use a break. So he feeds him. He’s not expecting a marriage proposal, but with what comes after, he doesn’t really mind.

The Unexpected Marriage of Peter Hale by moonstalker24

This is the story of how Peter gets married without technically dating anyone.

“You can bring your boyfriend with you,” Talia says.Peter stops giving Henry more bits of dried fruit to stare at his sister “Boyfriend?”“Of course!” Talia gestures at Stiles who looks around behind him with wide eyes. “I’m sure the whole family would be interested in meeting your young man.”

Domestic Bliss by moonstalker24

Stiles and Peter Stilinski-Hale through the years. Ace!fic all the way.

Utterly Appropriate by wynnebat

There’s only one person whom Stiles would marry, and whoever has asked for her hand isn’t on that list.

IBDC: Teen Wolf by moonstalker24

Chapter 14

Fem!Stiles, Royalty!AU

Out Of The East, Never See The Sun Rise by ladypigswagon

In the beginning, there are three absolutes.

One. Stiles is a god, forged of starlight and collapsing galaxies and he is eternal.

Two. Peter is human, fragile bone and viscous blood and he is temporary.

Three. Stiles and Peter are in love; love that claws its way inside one’s heart like fish hooks; all encompassing love that is beautiful but dangerous.

Stiles is a god. Peter is human. They love each other.

Three absolutes.

Domestic Happiness, Thou Only Bliss Of Paradise That Hath Survived The Fall byladypigswagon

Stiles isn’t quite sure how this happened. He certainly doesn’t remember volunteering for this particular mission and yet here he is, playing house with Peter Hale of all people. White picket fence, yellow front door, mailbox with their names on it. It’s incredibly surreal.

Stiles isn’t sure how they’re going to successfully pull off a newlywed couple either. Just because he’s finally grown into his body and isn’t a gangly youth anymore doesn’t mean that he looks old enough to pull this off. He’s 24, barely out of Hogwarts (Deaton always sighs heavily when Stiles refers to his emissary training as Hogwarts) and he’s now fake married to Peter because they are the only single members of the pack. Stiles thinks that because they were the only single members that the job should have been fobbed off to one of them but apparently not. Apparently Stiles status as a spark means he’s the only one who can defeat the siren. Deaton had said something cryptic about werewolves being too easily influenced by high pitch frequencies. Something like that. Basically Stiles is the chosen one.

#ask #archercrow #teen wolf #steter #stiles stilinski #peter hale #fanfic rec #arranged marriage #fake marriage #married life #wedding au #marriage #just married

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