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turtletaubwrites · 7 months

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Needy For Me ~ Part 5

Pairing: Zoro x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2,694

This is part 5 of the Series 'We've All Got Needs,' linked below:

We've All Got Needs Masterlist

Ao3 Series Link

Summary: You get some unexpected advice while the swordsman takes time to think. Then it's time for the big talk.

Rating/Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content, Fem!Reader, 18+ Only, MDNI, Reader-Insert, Smut, Rough Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Swearing, Casual Sex, Overstimulation, Multiple Orgasms, Condoms, Shameless Smut, Masturbation, Vaginal Fingering, Friends With Benefits, Crewmates With Benefits, Relationship Discussions, Zoro's a straight to the point kinda guy and we love that, but now he's gotta do a big think

A/N: I literally can't stop writing these. I'm on medical leave for a month, and my brain has decided that all I'm going to do is write fics, all day every day 😅 I'm so happy to hear your reactions to this series, it's been cheering me up! I hope you enjoy this next installment 😊

Too many eyes grabbed onto you as you walked into the galley for breakfast. You felt your own eyes widen as you avoided catching any of them.

You knew why Zoro and Sanji were tracking your every movement, but Robin’s eyes felt heavy as well.

I should have known. There was no way the boys could be subtle.

You looked up at Robin briefly, her sly smirk making your cheeks flush.

The conversation felt muffled, but luckily the swordsman and the cook didn’t try to interact with you. You’d told Zoro you’d wait for him to figure things out, and your mind was dreading every outcome you could imagine.

I don’t want this to end.

Biting your lip, you let Luffy grab the rest of the food on your plate that you couldn’t force down.

In the hallway, aimlessly moving toward the deck, you jumped at a finger tapping you on the shoulder. You held your breath, turning to see which of the boys were pulling for your attention.

There was no one there.

Your brows furrowed, and you wondered if all your sleepless nights were starting to fuck with you. Until an arm appeared on the floor, beckoning you forward.

Gulping, you followed a trail of arms, until you found yourself in front of Robin’s door. One of her arms opened it from your side, motioning for you to enter.

Robin sat, lounging on her loveseat, which you had no idea how she’d gotten through her door. She was sprawled, lazily looking through a heavy book until she lifted her lovely blue eyes to meet yours. Scooting gracefully over, she set the book down before patting the cushion next to her.

You felt frozen stiff, but managed to make your way there, smelling her lovely vanilla musk scent.

Robin tilted her head, with another slow smile before finally breaking the silence.

“You’ve got those boys in more of a tussle than usual.”

Panicking, you stuttered, feeling your fingers grip into your thighs.

“It’s alright, Y/N.”

Robin’s tone stayed calm, as it always was, as she patted your clenched fist.

“I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. I want you to know that you can come to me if things get overwhelming.”

You felt heat build in your throat, not knowing why her words were hitting you quite so hard.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Giving her a watery smile, you gratefully shared your dilemma. Robin kept her calm eyes on you, nodding, and occasionally asking the perfect questions that helped you clarify your own thoughts.

Which were still jumbled.

“Well, Y/N. You are waiting for the swordsman to decide what he wants. You’ve told him, and now you’ve told me, what you believe you should want. Or what you believe would be the smart choice.”

You bit your lip as she kept dragging truths from you.

“What are the outcomes that you would prefer?”

Releasing a strained laugh, you lifted your face toward the ceiling while you sighed.

“I don’t know, Robin. All I know is that I’m scared to risk my place on the crew, scared to mess up our dynamics. But I also really don’t want to stop what we’re doing.”

Chuckling, Robin leaned back to look you over.

“No, I'm sure you don’t. And what about the cook?”

“Oh, uh. I don’t know. That kind of threw me off guard.”

Robin tapped her finger to her lips, looking like she was pondering the meaning of the universe.

“Well, it looks like you need to figure out your feelings too. I have my own opinions, if you’d like an outside perspective.”

You nodded, almost desperate for advice.

“If you and the swordsman fall for each other, it could be scary, uncertain. But we are all family. We would get through it all together.”

Tears welled up, not falling yet. The warmth you felt was so soothing.

“On the other hand, if you’d prefer to keep things casual, I think you should enjoy them both. You wouldn’t want to waste such a bounty.”

You choked on air, waiting for Robin to say she was joking. But Robin just stared at you with mischief, almost a challenge in her eyes.

“I-I…”

“Come on, love. You’ve got plenty to think about.”

Robin's many limbs gently pushed you from the couch, and into the hallway. You went along, mouth gaping until you looked back at her through the door frame. She sat there, still smirking.

“By the way, I wouldn’t be opposed to hearing some of the more salacious details later.”

Robin winked as the door closed, and one of her arms smacked your ass in the hallway.

Clamping your hand over your mouth to cover your surprised yelp, you stood in stunned silence for a while.

Then, grinning, you made your way to your own quarters to think things over. You breathed easier knowing that someone was on your side, not just fighting over it.

The rest of the day was a wash. There was no way you could accomplish anything until your mind was settled, so you fucking napped. You needed it after the past few days with Zoro.

Fuck.

You were dozing in your hanging bed, but just that brief thought of Zoro had your body reacting.

He’s fucking right. I am needy.

You wished he’d knock on your door right now, and take advantage of the wetness the thought of him had caused.

Then your brain woke enough to remember more of the dilemma and you shook yourself, trying to get out of your head.

‘I think you should enjoy them both.’

Robin's playful words twisted through your brain, until you were reaching for yourself again. The thought of Sanji touching himself while you came on Zoro’s cock. The way he’d begged you to fuck him, the way his tongue hung out of his mouth when he heard you moan.

Your fingers found your swollen clit, so ready to be toyed with after all your recent pleasure.

Zoro shoving you against the wall, reaching down your pants to test how wet Sanji made you. Sanji tracing his fingers along yours, promising to focus on your pleasure. Zoro shoving his shirt in your mouth to muffle your screams while he fucked you into the floor.

It didn’t take long for your body to release, and you’d gotten so skilled at holding in your moans that you barely made a sound while you twitched. Panting, you stared at the ceiling and groaned.

Both? Both. Both is good.

You covered your face with your hands, realizing you’d just dragged your slick along your forehead. Groaning, and laughing at yourself, you hopped off the bed and got ready for dinner.

Robin gave you a knowing smile when you walked in, and you practically ran to sit next to her comforting energy. The meal went about the same as usual, though you were pleasantly surprised to see that Sanji was giving you space, not pushing like he was yesterday.

Zoro was still scowling at him, but you were pretty sure he did that everyday.

As you followed Robin out the door, a light tap on your shoulder brought you around. Zoro leaned against the doorframe, and you heard Sanji behind him, cleaning up the kitchen.

“I, uh-”

“Take watch with me?”

Zoro kept his eyes on yours, but pointed up. You smiled when you saw he was pointing in the opposite direction from the crows nest, so you led the way.

Settling against the rough wood floor of the crows nest, you pulled your knees to your chest, and tried not to look panicked.

No matter what, I’m a Strawhat Pirate. Everything else is just gravy.

Zoro had his back against the post across from you, legs stretched out beside yours. He stopped gazing at the stars to finally meet your face.

“I think you’re right. I think having a serious relationship with a crew member could be a bad idea.”

Swallowing, you tried to steady your breathing.

“I uh. Fuck. I’m not good at this shit.”

Your lips curved, but you held in what you could.

“I like you, Y/N. I like you as a crew mate, and a friend.”

Your breath was caught, waiting for him to finish.

“We shouldn’t go further than that. We can’t make our decisions muddled.”

His eyes seared into yours, and you silently begged him to keep going so you could breathe.

“I want to keep our arrangement. But I think if I can’t handle sharing you, then we shouldn’t keep going.”

His pauses were fucking killing you.

“I’d like to stay crew mates with benefits, and agree that we can see or sleep with who we want.”

Your brows flew so high, it felt like you might lose them.

“A-Are you sure?”

“Yes, Needy. I did the big think, and the big talk. I promise I’ll do it again if I need to.”

You laughed, then caught yourself.

“Thank you, Zoro. I agree with that arrangement. And we can keep talking about it, please let me know-”

“I will, Y/N... So what happens now?”

“Hmm”

“Are you gonna go fuck the cook now?”

You held in your laughter again, not wanting to push this struggling swordsman.

“Not tonight. Plus, I need to talk to him first. He might not be okay with our arrangement anyway.”

“Oh, he’ll be okay with it. That pervy cook’ll do anything to get you to touch him.”

You held in your smile as you watched Zoro quietly seethe, resigned to the possibility.

“Well, Zoro. We can keep talking. We have to keep communicating. If this hurts you-”

“It won’t hurt me. You’re right. We shouldn’t get too attached because it could endanger the group. If I can’t pull my shit together around the waiter, then we shouldn’t risk it.”

Your body was absolutely buzzing. This is crazy.

“And you're sure?”

“Yes , Needy. I’ll let you know if it changes… So now what?”

Your skin was hot as you watched Zoro’s lips, and his strong fingers that flexed as he spoke.

“Well, now I was hoping you’d fuck me in the crows nest,” you teased with finger tracing along his calf.

Zoro’s satisfied smile brightened his scowling face, and you loved to see it. This must have been so difficult for him.

And now Zoro crawled over to you, an evil glint in his eyes.

Oh fuck.

He kissed your jaw and neck, and you sighed into his gentle touches. Your arms wrapped around him, enjoying the softness, but waiting for his strength to take you.

Zoro’s lips and tongue kept dancing along your neck and shoulder, and you shivered as you left kisses on his.

His growled words vibrated through your ear, making your body flood, aching for him.

“You’ll still be my Needy girl, won’t you, Y/N?”

“Y-Yes Zoro,” you gasped, back arching for him.

“Needy for me,” he asked before sucking your earlobe, scraping it with his hungry teeth.

“Fuck yes, Zoro. I still need you. I need your cock.”

Zoro took your lips then, holding your body to him, and you almost sobbed with the anticipation of whatever he was about to do to you. Zoro broke the kiss to trail his tongue down your throat, pulling your top over your head.

You cried out as Zoro massaged your breasts, his movements getting harsher as he growled.

Panting, you reached for his shirt, but he tore it off, then pulled your pants down. You took your bra and panties off while you watched him strip, while he stroked a condom onto that long, beautiful shaft of his.

“Let me see you.”

A moan escaped you, and you set yourself up with your clothes as a pillow before spreading your thighs for him.

Zoro’s eyes shifted even darker, and you could have been scared if you weren’t so ready for him to use you.

Zoro brought his face close to your core, trailing a finger through your folds to see the wet strands as he pulled away. His breathing hitched, and you loved to see how your body affected him.

“So fucking hungry.”

A small moan turned bigger as he entered you, two fingers already going to swift work. Zoro always took your pleasure from you, never waiting for it to arrive. His other hand went for your clit, attacking that bundle of nerves until you were thrashing for him, sobbing so you wouldn’t scream, coming for Zoro as he chuckled over you.

“Can’t get enough, huh? Does my needy kitten want some more?”

“Gods, yes pleeease!”

“That’s right, beg for me.”

You kept pleading, until he set himself up between your legs.

“Keep begging, Needy girl.”

And you did. You moaned, and gasped and begged until Zoro brought his cock to you, circling it around your clit while you twitched.

Zoro entered you, so slowly, and you enjoyed every inch as he worked himself into you.

He looked so satisfied, his eyes still filled with that look, like he’d claimed you. You shivered under him, watching him groan as your body clenched around his.

Zoro reached his arms under your legs, almost rolling your body as he rested your calves on either side of his neck, your knees almost reaching your shoulders.

Even without thrusting, the change in angles made you writhe, breathing his name. Zoro caged you in his arms, eyes blown out as he stared at your panting lips.

“Can you take this cock for me, Needy?”

“Yes, Zoro, I can take-”

Your words were choked out of you as you tried not to scream. The angle Zoro had forced you into, was fucking you into, had your mind fucking melting.

Right as you were about to tell him it was too much, the pain became flooded with pleasure. The feeling was so hot, so sharp, but now waves of vibration shot though you as you came, pulsing and squeezing him with your aching pussy.

“Fuck, Needy. That’s it, baby.”

Moaning under his praise, you started to feel it was too much again, but Zoro took you over.

He snaked a hand around your leg, playing with your clit until you were already so close again, panting and losing your mind.

“You’re so good at taking my cock, Needy. Show me how hungry that pussy is for me.”

You lost control of your body, your arms and legs clenching hard as you shattered around him.

“Fuuuck, Needy…”

Zoro twitched above you, but your mind was fucking blank. It was so intense, it almost felt like your ears were ringing as you started to come down.

Zoro had pulled out of you, and set your legs along the floor. Your heart felt stuck in your throat as he laid himself onto you. His head was resting on your lower stomach, his arms wrapped around your sides. You looked up at the stars above, and almost felt uncertain tears stinging your eyes.

“Zoro?”

He twitched, slowly lifting off of you.

“Fuck, Y/N, don’t let me lay down again. I’m about to pass out naked.”

Zoro shook himself before helping you dress, brushing off your clothes.

You sat there looking at him, catching yourself wanting to cater to his feelings, to focus on his needs.

Friends and crew mates should do that too, but you knew there would be a fine line to cross before caring too much.

Instead of asking if he was okay, or if he was really sure again, you decided to trust that your friend was an adult, and had told you the truth.

“Thanks for helping me out, Zoro.”

The sight of his smug grin was perfect, and you climbed down feeling oh so happy.

As you crept across the deck you caught the whiff of cigarette smoke close by, and shook your head.

That’s a tomorrow conversation. But I hope he enjoyed the show.

Giggling to yourself, you raced to your room before any more Strawhats could claim you.

Rolling into your blankets, you couldn't help your muffled squeals as you imagined what tomorrow would bring.

Thank you for reading! 💜

TurtleTaub Fanfic Masterlist

Part 6

Buy me a coffee ☕🙏🏼

#zoro smut #zoro x reader #Reader Insert #Fem!Reader #Smut #mine #One Piece smut #Opla smut #opla zoro x reader #zoro x you #zoro fanfic #zoro fanfiction #x reader #turtletaub fics

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ramblingthoughtsofayoungadult · 5 months

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Unpredictable, Part 8-Limoreau x black!fem!reader fic

A/N: This took me way too long to write but as per usual, please let me know what you think and if you want more.

Warnings: angst, negative family dynamics, eating issues, body issues, and swearing.

Word Count: 7.8k

Series Masterlist

Taglist: @badbishsblog, @gardenof-venus, @morelovemorepeacemoretattoo-blog, @kasslucilfer, @darksoul100

Luke’s smile would have been more contagious if my thoughts were not so jumbled. Even though he was standing right across from me, my brain refused to believe he was real. Sure, he was wearing his favorite brown jacket over a t-shirt with jeans, and the sun (or whatever light) highlighted the natural glow around him. But, it was impossible.

“Impossible?” Luke asked. “That’s a little harsh.”

I hesitated and pressed the back of my hand to my forehead. “Sorry, this is a lot to take in.”

But I could see the scene in my mind’s eye: the Vought clean-up crew hosing the blood off the cobblestone in front of Lamplighter, the chunks of Luke they put in biohazard bags, and the smell---

I wretched at the thought of it and tried not to double over. Luke rushed over to me and softly grasped my shoulders.

“Hey, are you okay, Y/N?” he asked.

“No,” I muttered, shaking my head. “I…I saw you die, and this is a messed up joke if this is a joke. Or…”

Luke sighed. “You’re not dead if that’s what you’re thinking.”

He slowly backed away and I straightened up. Then, I launched myself at him and he caught me in a bear hug, laughing as he did. The scent of pine and clean aftershave almost made me cry.

“I miss you,” I mumbled into his chest.

“I miss you too,” he replied.

“I wish none of this happened. Why didn’t you tell any of us what was going on?” I demanded.

Luke paused. “I didn’t know how but, it sounds like you guys are figuring things out.”

I slowly pulled away from Luke and eyed him. “How can you tell?”

Luke pursed his lips. “I’m a manifestation of Cate’s subconsciousness. So, I see everything she sees.”

At his words, my eyes wandered around the forest. At first glance, it looked like any other forest with large trees and whistling wind. But on closer inspection, there were no woodland creatures, no sounds of birds, and the sky was more like a large gray cloud with red cracks that flashed every few seconds.

“I’m in Cate’s head?”

“You catch on quick but then again, you always do.”

I looked up at Luke. “So, if I’m in here, what’s happening to my body? And where’s everyone else?”

“You touched Cate when she was in extreme duress and she retreated to her mind but she brought you with her,” Luke explained. “Your body could be experiencing several things: seizure, vomiting, a comatose state, or hysteria.”

I groaned. “So, her going into shock put me in shock?”

“Pretty much.”

Another shock of lightning flashed across the “sky” but this time, it struck and destroyed a boulder that was about thirty feet away from Luke and me. The crash made me jump and Luke grabbed my arm.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

“She’s kind of self-destructing. This hasn’t happened before and the only way to get out is if she wakes up,” Luke warned.

“So, I just need to find Cate and wake us both up,” I confirmed with a nod.

Lightning cracked through the sky and I jumped further into Luke’s grip.

“Basically but you don’t have a lot of time. If she doesn’t wake up, you’ll be stuck here forever.”

His words hung heavy over me and I could feel pressure weighing down on my shoulders. Somehow, I had to find Cate and snap her out of this state. Even though she’d been through a lot in the last few hours, she didn’t have to go this far.

I managed a smile. “Well, at least I have you here as a guide.”

Luke straightened up and puffed out his chest. “Of course. So, all you have to do---”

An instant later, a flash of lightning took him with it. It was difficult to tell whether knowing he was already dead made this second loss easier or harder. At the same time, it was nice to see Luke again, to talk to him, and touch him.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and tried to think. The best course of action would be to try to use my powers again and figure out the best route out. It definitely could not hurt after the last couple of tries.

I closed my eyes and focused on the best way to find Cate. However, it was like my powers didn’t exist at all. Before, it felt like they were just out of reach and this was definitely worse.

I opened my eyes as I felt my heartbeat pick up.

“Breathe, Y/N, breathe,” I hissed.

There was no time for my anxiety to spike. No one else was here except me and Cate and I was the only one who could find her.

After a few deep breaths, I opened my eyes and saw a large glossy oak door standing in front of me. The door looked familiar, and I couldn’t stop myself from grabbing its knob and pushing it open.

Seconds later, the bright light stunned me as I wandered into the space. When my eyes adjusted, I realized that I was in Dean Shetty’s office, complete with the expensive furniture and tapestry. Dean Shetty sat at her desk and stirred some sugar into her cup of tea. Cate was sitting across from her but she looked much more innocent, like she had when we first met.

She sipped from a pristine teacup and tapped her gloved fingers against the porcelain. She wore a white varsity sweater and ripped jeans.

“How is your first week as a sophomore?” Dean Shetty asked.

Cate nodded. “It’s going well so far. It feels different.”

“That’s only a natural feeling. You are much more in control of your powers and you are more experienced.”

“Thank you, Indira, it’s all because of your help.”

Dean Shetty shook her head and set her teacup down. “No, I only supported you; you did a lot of work. You are in the Top 20 for a reason.” She clasped her hands together. “Considering your progress, I think it’s time that I give you a new challenge.”

Cate raised her eyebrows. “Challenge?”

“Yes. I believe it is time for you to pass on what you learned and that you are ready now. There is a freshman that I would like you to meet. She is an incredibly bright, talented supe but, she needs some guidance to realize her full potential.” Dean Shetty grinned. “Considering how similar your abilities are, I believe you would be a fantastic match as her peer mentor.”

Cate paused. “Peer mentor?”

“Yes, a guide of sorts about how to succeed at Godolkin; who to befriend, what events to engage with, and how to gain more control over your abilities. These sorts of things tend to come better from someone who is of a similar age. What do you think?”

Even though it sounded like a question, it wasn’t. Dean Shetty’s tone was light but her eyes seemed to darken slightly and she straightened up a little as she eyed Cate. Cate stared at the teacup in her hand for a while, mulling things over.

“Okay, if you think it’s a good idea, then I’m open to it,” Cate declared.

Dean Shetty smiled. “Wonderful.”

��When do I meet her?”

A second later, someone knocked on the door behind me and Dean Shetty rose from her seat.

“Right now,” she commented.

As she walked towards me, Dean Shetty’s gaze never left the door. Even as she walked past me, she didn’t acknowledge me.

“They probably can’t see me,” I concluded.

Dean Shetty opened the door in one flawless motion but she stood in a way where I couldn’t see who was on the other side.

“Am I early?” a soft voice asked.

“No, you have impeccable timing. Come on in.”

Dean Shetty stepped aside and in walked a very anxious freshman version of myself. I watched as my freshman self fought to not grab at the black tennis skirt that swayed when she walked. The silk pressed curls bounced against the middle of her back as she approached Dean Shetty’s desk.

Cate stood when freshman me got close enough and Dean Shetty stood next to me.

“Cate, I’d like you to meet Y/N Y/L/N. She’s at the top of Brink’s first-year class and I am confident her star will continue to rise with proper guidance,” Dean Shetty announced.

Freshman me extended a hand towards Cate and Cate accepted it. “It’s nice to meet you. I saw your TikTok on supe psychology and it was really cool.”

Did I always ramble that much?

“I’m glad you liked it and it’s nice to meet you too,” Cate responded.

Dean Shetty gestured for Cate and freshman me to sit and she poured freshman me a cup of tea. “I was just telling Cate that I think she would be a wonderful peer mentor.”

“Peer mentor?” I echoed.

“Yes, someone your age who can help guide you through GOD U. I’m sure you’ve noticed how hectic it can be and not everyone survives here. Any freshman would kill to have personal time with a Top 20 supe but they do not all meet the standard to do so.”

Freshman me’s eyes widened with each word Dean Shetty spoke. “That’s amazing but, why me?”

“Like I said you are exceptional in your classes already and your skill set and Ms. Dunlap’s are similar and cause similar side effects. I believe she can help you navigate that as well as all things GOD U.”

Freshman me turned to Cate and smiled softly. “If you’re okay with it…”

“Of course. What is your ability, by the way?”

Freshman me rattled off my ability and Cate nodded, impressed. Then, Dean Shetty’s cell phone rang and she excused herself to take it. Cate leaned closer to Freshman Me.

“Don’t be so nervous. I already know that we’ll be friends,” she smiled.

Freshman me grinned in reply and I could feel the residual giddiness or that could have been me remembering this day. Cate was so impressive at that point that I was afraid that she wouldn’t want to be stuck with me or ignore me. But the anger that rose at the sight of Cate’s grin leapt out of me.

“If we were such good friends, why did you trap me in your head?” I hissed.

Cate turned to me. “I wasn’t lying, Y/N. I thought your powers were impressive and I could tell how powerful you were when we first met. I still want us to be friends.”

I stomped over to her. “Then, let’s get out of here. We can go together; we don’t have to stay here.”

But as quickly as she was there, she was gone. Suddenly, I was in the corner of the training gym and Luke, Andre, and Jordan were hanging out on the other end. Jordan was in their female form, wearing a baggy tank top and loose sweatpants, something they’d rarely wear outside of a memory.

I remembered this, this was the first time I ever trained with the Top Five. Cate had dragged me to the gym, insisting that I meet her friends and almost-boyfriend while also improving my combat skills. At the time, I thought she was crazy and that maybe it was a cruel prank but her genuine smile and encouragement were comforting.

Slowly, I approached the group, moving to stand near Jordan and listening to the conversation.

“So, who’s this girl Cate’s bringing?” Andre asked.

“Her mentee. Shetty set them up, but she sounds excited,” Luke answered.

“You don’t have a name?” Jordan asked.

Luke laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Cate mentioned it, but I can’t remember.”

Jordan rolled her eyes. “Well, this freshman better not waste my time.”

Luke playfully elbowed her. “Stop being so grumpy. If Shetty paired Cate with her, it probably means she’s impressive. At least give her a chance.”

Jordan scowled. “Why do you always have to be nice?”

Andre clapped his hands on Luke’s shoulders. “Because he’s Golden Boy.”

Watching past Jordan in all their surliness was jarring and I felt like a freshman again.

A second later, the training door opened, and I watched as Cate strutted in confidently with an arm wrapped around freshman me’s shoulders. I could feel the terror and anxiety wafting off freshman me as I watched her nervously eye the trio.

“Sorry, we’re late!” Cate called.

“It’s okay,” Luke insisted with a dazzling grin.

I giggled as Freshman me’s knees wobbled; it was funny how such a short time ago I couldn’t even make eye contact with Luke.

“Everyone, this is Y/N Y/L/N, my peer mentee. She’s doing amazing in her crim classes but needs a little help with combat,” Cate explained.

Freshman me did a small wave to everyone and Andre smirked as he swaggered up to her.

“Cate was keeping you all to herself, huh?” Andre commented.

Freshman me hesitated. “Uh…”

“Relax, Andre,” Luke said.

“Yeah, I don’t want you freaking her out with all that rizz,” Cate mocked.

Andre rolled his eyes and muttered something about the couple being “cockblockers”.

“Oh, you must know Jordan since they TA the first-year class,” Luke acknowledged.

“Um, sort of, we never…really…talk,” Freshman me admitted.

“Aw, don’t be scared of Jordan, their bark is worse than their bite,” Cate encouraged.

Andre raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure about that?”

Jordan scoffed. “I’ll give you this, you’re the least annoying freshman.”

“Thanks?”

“Okay, let’s split up into pairs.” Cate turned to Freshman me. “Don’t worry about getting hurt----we never go all out in training and we only spar until someone’s knocked out of bounds.”

Freshman me nodded and I watched as she side-eyed Jordan. Even though I’d known that I’d have to spar with them, it didn’t make my nervousness any better. However, the four of them split up amongst themselves, with Andre and Luke going first, followed by Cate and Jordan, and decided that the winners of those rounds would play rock-paper-scissors to determine who sparred with me.

Andre and Luke’s fight was interesting, and I forgot how close of a match they were. Of course, Luke used his fire and flying abilities to his advantage, but Andre was still a force to be reckoned with. Luke still won and Andre grinned as Luke helped him to his feet afterwards. Cate and Jordan’s fight was as surprisingly decent as I remembered. Even though Jordan switched between their forms depending on the circumstance, Cate managed to keep up for a while. It wasn’t until Jordan leg swept her, knocking her out of bounds, that the fight ended.

“Not…fair,” Cate panted as she sat up.

“Don’t be a sore loser,” Jordan teased as she helped her up.

Cate smirked and they stepped out of the ring. Andre playfully rubbed his hands together.

“So, who gets to fight the freshman?” he sang.

“It’s Y/N,” Cate corrected.

“Right, sorry.”

Freshman me smiled softly as she stood from her seat and walked closer to the group. Luke and Jordan faced each other and played rock-paper-scissors. Playing best out of three was a little cruel since Freshman me hoped to spar with Luke. At the very least, he would be nice when I inevitably lost. Jordan was difficult to read but I’d had a feeling that they would taunt me about losing.

When Jordan won, I couldn’t read their expression but Freshman me was terrified.

“Stop looking like I’m going to kill you,” Jordan snapped.

Freshman me jumped and Cate placed a hand on her shoulder.

“Like I said, don’t worry, you’ll be fine,” she whispered.

At the time, I was so frazzled that I couldn’t focus on the outcome of the fight. Instead, I had focused on keeping my lunch down. Instead of joining Andre, Cate, and me on the sidelines, Luke stood on the mat, a couple of feet outside the circle. He waited a couple of seconds before signaling for Freshman me and Jordan to spar.

My shoulders hiked up towards my ears as I watched Freshman me clumsily evade Jordan’s attacks. At that time, I’d learned how to predict my opponent’s movements but I rarely landed strong attacks. Brink thought that because my mental strength was so high my physical strength had no choice but to lag.

“It would be unfair at that point. But, as a future supe, you do need to learn the basics,” he’d instructed.

Freshman me’s form was all over the place; her guard slipped every few seconds, her feet never had solid contact with the ground, and any kick or punch was weak at worst and sloppy at best. I cringed when she took a small energy blast from Jordan that knocked her out of bounds. It didn’t hurt but it was definitely a shock at the time.

“Jordan!” Cate admonished as she jumped to her feet.

She started to rush forward but Andre held her back and Luke shook his head.

“She’s fine,” Luke mouthed.

Freshman me panted on the ground, sweat staining the lime green Alo set she wore a couple of shades darker. Jordan shifted into their male form as they sauntered over to me and extended a hand. Freshman me stared at his hand like it would turn into a snake at any second.

“Come on, you just saw I won’t bite,” he quipped.

At his words, Freshman me accepted his hand and Jordan pulled her to her feet in one move. I smiled as she almost bumped into him, but Jordan steadied her by gripping my forearms.

“I never thought you’d be this clumsy,” he commented.

Freshman me huffed. “I’m, uh, usually not this bad.”

“Well, your form needs some work, and you need to build up more confidence when you’re on the offense. But, you were great at evading me.” “Until that last move.”

“Not a lot of people could avoid that, especially not a freshman. Don’t worry, we’ll work on it.”

Freshman me frowned as Jordan turned and started sauntering back to Cate and Andre. “Wh-what does that mean?”

Jordan glanced at her over his shoulder. “It means I’ll spar with you more often. You can’t be one of Brink’s new favorites and be this bad at fighting, freshie.”

Freshman me continued to gawk at him as he walked away. Andre finally let Cate run over to Freshman me and she insisted on looking her over. When Jordan finally got close enough to me, he had the smallest smile on his face. I stood just as he bent down to grab his water bottle.

“I still don’t get how you flipped like that. You mostly ignored me until then and I was a horrible sparring partner,” I commented.

Jordan chuckled. “I thought you’d get it by now.”

When he turned to face me, my stomach dropped. I didn’t understand why I still had this reaction to him after everything that happened. No matter what, every time he looked at me, I felt warm all over.

“You agreed to train with some of the highest ranking supes on campus and even though you were intimidated, you did your best and you didn’t give up,” Jordan stated. “Before we sparred, I thought Brink liked you so much because of your ability but it was more than that: you face challenges, even when you don’t want to, like a real supe.”

“So do you,” I pointed out.

Jordan shook his head. “Yeah, but it’s different when you do it. I didn’t want to dig into any of this GOD U shit but you didn’t hesitate. It’s scary but also inspiring.”

It took all my strength to keep my mouth from falling open. I inspired Jordan? The same Jordan who did everything in their power to stay in the Top Three. The same Jordan who impressed one of the most influential crime experts so much that they became his TA.

None of this made any sense and I wondered how long Jordan thought of me like that.

Do they actually think about you like that?

I blinked and my heart sunk at the realization that Cate could have been messing with me; this was her domain after all.

But what if Cate knew what Jordan was thinking or feeling at the time? It was possible, especially if she had her gloves off.

“Jordan---"

“And that’s when I said, ‘I hate to tell you buddy but, you’re looking at the wrong end’!” a loud voice cut me off.

When I turned to face the direction of the voice, I was suddenly standing in the corner of the dining room at Mom’s. The candlelight from the tables reflected off the wall, giving the space a false sense of warmth. The scent of roasted turkey, mashed potatoes, yams, and collard greens tickled my nose as I wandered further into the room.

At the long table, Mom and Dad sat on opposite ends, the large spread Ms. Murphy, the family cook, prepared obstructing their views of each other. My brother, Isaac, sat on one side, grinning from ear to ear as both our parents laughed. My fourteen-year-old self sat across from him, smiling as she pushed some greens around on her plate.

I remembered this, this was our first Thanksgiving after Isaac took the Buenos Aires job. The tension was so thick in the air that I could have choked on it and it nearly stopped my appetite.

Younger me slouched in her chair, clad in a red plaid cap-sleeve dress with her hair swept up in a loose curly bun. My face was so much rounder then. As I slowly traversed the table, Isaac pushed up the sleeves of his charcoal gray Brooks Brothers sweater.

Everyone liked Isaac, boys, girls, adults, everyone. If no one fell for his charm, his good sense of humor, or his fantastic social skills, they tended to be drawn to his tall, broad frame and smooth copper skin. When I was a kid, Isaac was everything.

“And that happened your first day?” Dad asked as he adjusted his glasses.

Isaac shook his head. “First week.”

“As expected from our brilliant son,” Mom bragged, sipping some Dom Perignon.

Isaac’s laugh sounded like a deeper-pitched version of Denzel Washington’s. Younger me smiled widely at the sound while I stared on, knowing full well that he probably got it from years of practice.

“I mean, I’m still learning a lot. Everyone I work with has been very welcoming,” Isaac insisted.

“Are you learning a lot about the culture? In school, we learned that it’s so vibrant there,” Younger me piped in.

Mom’s gaze cut towards me. “Y/N, don’t interrupt Isaac.”

Younger me shrank back and I flinched. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

Dad rolled his eyes. “Y/N was only asking a question, Y/M/N. She hasn’t seen him in months, it’s only natural.”

Isaac raised his hands. “It’s okay, everyone.” He looked at Younger me. “It’s a really good question, Y/N. These past two years, I’ve really immersed myself in the culture and I’ve even started picking up more Spanish. Also, the Argentinians are a very welcoming people and I’m so fortunate to work and live with them.”

For the first time, I realized how practiced Isaac sounded. It was the same way Coco sounded whenever she practiced speeches but, she was also going into political science.

Who was Isaac trying to impress or sway?

I made my way to Younger Me and stood against the wall behind her. Her eyes were so wide and sparkling, hanging on to Isaac’s every word. I wondered if that was the same way I looked when I was rushing Si Chi.

Younger Me ate a mouthful of yams and nodded happily. “I’m glad you’re having such a good time. We miss you here, though.”

“But this is a great opportunity for your brother, Y/N. We couldn’t hold him back here,” Dad interjected.

“Right, yeah---” “Yes,” Mom corrected.

“Yes,” Younger Me repeated, turning to Isaac. “Can you pass me the turkey?”

My stomach dropped as the memory echoed in my ears. I wrapped my arms around my waist and leaned further into the wall, rubbing my sides.

“Sure, Sis.” Isaac grabbed the dish and started to hand it over when Dad placed a hand on Isaac’s wrist.

“Y/N, you’ve already had a…generous helping. Don’t you think you’ve had enough?” he asked gently.

I thought I was sinking into the ground as I watched Younger Me grasp for words and could feel how flustered she was in my chest.

“You can’t blame Y/N, Dad. Ms. Murphy’s an amazing cook,” Isaac tried.

Mom scoffed. “It’s all that cooking that made her fat.”

The room was silent for a moment. Suddenly, Dad looked both shocked and understanding as he stared at Mom, Mom was staring at a painting on another wall as she sipped her drink, and Isaac couldn’t take his eyes off the turkey dish in his hands.

I could feel the ball begin in Younger Me’s throat and the tears burned in her eyes as she tried to keep herself together.

“Y/M/N,” Dad admonished.

Mom cut her gaze towards him. “Don’t use that tone with me. Unlike you, I care for our daughter’s health. It’s especially important considering her abilities and we have no idea how obesity could impact them!”

Dad set the turkey dish down and Isaac started nibbling on some mac and cheese. “Don’t do that, I care about Y/N’s health. She has made a lot of progress thanks to my encouragement.”

Mom rolled her eyes. “Oh, you’re saying that like the dance lessons that I paid for had nothing to do with it?”

“Oh yes, Y/M/N, only your contributions supported our daughter. When will you stop acting like you’ve financially supported our children this entire time? Don’t forget who gave you the money to start your agency.”

If looks could kill, Dad would have been dead a long time ago. Mom threw her head back and drained the last of her glass. When she set the glass down, she maintained a neutral expression.

“You can stop throwing that in my face now, Y/D/N; I’m the one who grew it without your or anyone else’s help!”

They went back and forth for a few more minutes and I watched Younger Me’s mind race.

Finally, she interrupted, “Did I tell you that I got all As for the semester?”

The statement made Mom and Dad pause and they relaxed a little.

“That’s wonderful, Y/N,” Dad praised.

“That’s my little sister,” Isaac added with a grin. “Have you solved any cases recently?”

Younger Me grinned. “Well, there’s this one murder that happened out in Cincinnati; a woman was found in a dumpster horribly attacked. The police think it’s a one-off but, that makes no sense since it matches the MO of several other murdered women who were found in the state.”

“What’s the MO?” Isaac asked, sipping some pinot noir.

That was when I noticed that there was something different about Isaac’s eyes. The light brown orbs looked slightly more playful than usual, almost mischievous.

“Oh, she was bludgeoned to death with a blunt object and raped post-mortem,” Younger Me rattled off.

“Y/N, we are eating,” Mom said slowly.

Younger Me hesitated. “Sorry, Mom, I was just answering Isaac’s question.”

“You’ll get better at reading situations, hon,” Dad assured.

Mom shook her head and started stabbing at some greens on her plate. “I don’t recall having this issue with Isaac.” She glanced warmly at him. “You were always so polite and well-mannered.”

“I was well-mannered,” I huffed.

Isaac smiled sheepishly. “It’s different for different people. Y/N will be fine.”

Younger Me nodded slightly but I knew she was trying to keep the tears from spilling down her cheeks.

“I hope so. You know, Vought is merciless about who they select to represent them. With every B-list hero in my agency, they are trained to hell in PR. There can be no mistakes, Y/N, not if you want a future as a supe.”

Younger Me nodded. “Yes, Mom.”

After a few moments where the only sounds were cutlery hitting the plates, Ms. Murphy stepped into the dining room. The portly older black woman rubbed her hands on the towel attached to her apron.

“Pardon me but, dessert is about ready. Should I have the table cleared?” Ms. Murphy asked.

Isaac stood. “It’s alright, Ms. Murphy, I’ll clear the table.”

“Isaac, there’s no need, we have people for that,” Mom insisted.

“It’s okay, I’m happy to help.”

Ms. Murphy nodded and shot a glance in Younger Me’s direction before slipping back into the kitchen. Isaac gracefully collected his plate and started going around the table, collecting ours.

“What a polite boy I have,” Dad complimented, playfully punching Isaac’s arm as he past.

“Despite all that success you’re so humble,” Mom added. “Remember this when you start to get big, Y/N.”

Younger Me nodded and once Isaac was at the kitchen door, she stood. “I’ll go help with dessert.”

Neither of them responded as she trailed behind Isaac, and I trailed behind her. The kitchen smelled like pecan pie and my mouth watered. Ms. Murphy was fantastic at her job, but no one could do desserts like her. She claimed that the secret was that she used full-fat everything.

“A growing girl like you needs that,” she quipped once.

In one corner of the room, Ms. Murphy was adding the finishing touches to the immaculate pecan pie perched on a silver server. Isaac set the dirty dishes on the counter and opened the dishwasher. I decided the island was the best position since it gave me a good view of the two of us and kept me at a decent distance.

“Let me help you,” Younger Me insisted.

Isaac paused and nodded. “Sure, sis.”

“I’m gonna go take this out to your folks,” Ms. Murphy said, pecan pie in hand. She leaned down to Younger Me. “You eat as much of this as you want.”

Younger Me smiled softly as the older woman disappeared into the kitchen.

“It’s really good to have you home, Isaac,” Younger Me commented as she handed Isaac plates.

“You keep saying that,” Isaac joked.

“It’s true. It’s like before when you’re around,” Younger Me said.

Isaac tensed a little but continued loading the dishes. “So, how have things been since I was gone?”

“Horrible,” I stated.

At that time, Mom and Dad cooled off from World War III which was their divorce but they still fought every time they saw each other. Even though Dad moved out a while ago, they would still see each other for my dance recitals, cheer events, or awards ceremonies. And whenever one of them dropped me off with the other, the tension made me sick but the worst part was how they bad-mouthed each other.

They both said things that no daughter should hear about her parents.

“Fine, things have been fine,” Younger Me lied.

I could have cried for her as she fidgeted with a plate. At the time, I didn’t want to burden Isaac since all the phone calls and text conversations we had were so positive. He was doing important work and I didn’t want to complain. But at the same time, he had to know things were bad.

“That’s good to hear,” Isaac replied. “I want to make sure my little sister’s okay.”

Then, Younger Me hesitated and handed him a plate. She bit her bottom lip and several moments past before she said, “Actually, sometimes, things get really, really bad. They both say some things that I hope they don’t mean and sometimes, I know what’s coming but it still freaks me out.” Younger Me shrugged. “Sometimes, I wish I could escape far away from here, like you did.” As innocent as the words were, little did I know at the time that it would be enough to set Isaac off. He straightened from loading the dishes and closed the dishwasher door stronger than he had to. When he turned to Younger Me, the pleasant expression he wore all night disappeared; his jaw tensed and his eyes narrowed.

“You think I escaped?” he asked slowly.

Younger Me blinked and the realization of her words poured over her. “Isaac, I didn’t mean----”

“You think I took that job so that I could run away? It was a fantastic opportunity, and I would have been an idiot not to take it!” he hissed.

Younger Me flinched and I gritted my teeth. “No, it’s great, Isaac, really. We’re all so proud of you and you’ve been doing so much great work. I just meant that it must be nice to get away.”

“I would never want to get away from my family. Adults fight sometimes, Y/N, grow up.”

Isaac’s words stung against my face and I clenched my fists as Younger Me fumbled for words. As Younger Me pled more and more with Isaac, my anger grew.

“I’m sorry, Isaac, really. It’s okay, everything’s okay, don’t worry about us,” Younger Me insisted.

I scoffed. “Nothing was okay, and you had to know that.”

Then, Isaac’s gaze left Younger Me’s and burned into mine. “Stop overexaggerating, Y/N. You never went crazy and you got into the special supe school; you’re doing just fine, it couldn’t have been that bad.”

It was hard to tell whether Isaac’s tone or his insistence on being right was the nail in the coffin but I didn’t care as I charged around the island and stood in front of Younger Me.

“Are you kidding me? I had a million anxiety attacks, and I could barely sleep. No one noticed, though, because I almost killed myself keeping up good grades and trying not to eat too much because Mom and Dad would comment,” I snapped.

Isaac hesitated. “Like I said, though, you’re doing fine now.”

“I’m not fine!” I exclaimed. “I never was but I couldn’t show that because someone had to be the adult in this house. I still don’t understand how you all thought that was okay when it wasn’t.” I scoffed. “Wait, I have an idea, maybe it’s because perfect little Doctor Isaac couldn’t be burdened with the fact that he abandoned his little sister in hell!”

“I didn’t abandon you, it was a good job!” Isaac argued.

The laugh that erupted from my chest was spiteful and it had no joy or air in it. Then, I couldn’t stop laughing, to the point that I doubled over. Isaac must have thought I had lost it but I didn’t care as I straightened up.

“What are you laughing about?” he asked, frowning.

“You could have gotten a surgeon job anywhere in the country and you’re telling me the best offer was ten thousand miles away? You graduated at the top of the class, you had to have other offers.” I huffed. “I had to be so deep in denial but I knew, I had to know. But what does it matter as long as you’re still the favorite.”

“I’m not the favorite; you’re the one they made a superhero,” he defended.

“Please, Isaac, they think I’m a freak at worst and a profitable freak show at best. They never criticized you, they only ever did that with me.” I sniffed and looked up at him. “By the way, why didn’t you ever tell them that I wasn’t fat?”

Isaac hesitated. “What?”

“You were in school for, what, ten years and you became an expert on the human body and health. You could have stopped them from tormenting me about food and my body, but you didn’t. Why did you never defend me?”

His silence almost sent me into another fit of mad laughter, that and the stunned expression on his face. The giddiness and rage that flowed through my veins was almost dizzying as I stared at Isaac. I didn’t blink for so long that his face began to blur. Then, my legs started moving and I wandered around the state-of-the-art kitchen.

“You were always better at this than me-----the performing. It must have been easy coasting as an only child and every gold star, and every A was praised.” I paused and poked at the pot of greens. “They were happy back then.”

“Y/N, you’re talking crazy,” Isaac insisted.

I shook my head. “No, I’m not. All the overthinking and overanalyzing finally helped me realize the truth: you all hate me. No matter what cases I solved, how well I did in school, or how much weight I lost; it was never good enough.” Isaac was silent and I think it was the first time he didn’t know what to say. It was okay because I knew exactly what to say.

“This whole time, I thought that I had to earn people’s love and that if I just worked hard enough, I could get Mom to call me pretty or Dad to post a picture of us without trying to spite Mom.” I finally made eye contact with Isaac. “You made me think that I was broken.”

Then, the kitchen door swung open behind me and Mom and Dad entered the kitchen.

“What’s going on?” Mom asked.

“We heard yelling,” Dad added.

I smiled as I turned to them. “You all made me think I was worthless unless I was perfect. I thought I was going to die so many nights because I made one mistake in an essay or lost a friend because my powers creeped them out. But none of you cared.”

None of them spoke and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to hear any of them. All they could do was lie since I finally realized their true feelings.

My family hated me.

None of them ever really loved me.

My vison blurred as I tried to make eye contact with them again. “How could you think I could end up perfect when you all screwed me up so bad? You make me question myself so much that I’m not even sure what I want anymore.”

I could feel the sobs coming on but I willed them to stay at bay for a moment.

“I’ve met a lot of amazing people at Godolkin, crazy, talented people. But two of them stand out. One of them is this standoffish bigender person who always has a comeback but is actually the kindest person I’ve ever met. The other one is this amazing girl who can see the brighter side of things no matter what, even when people betray her.” I sighed. “And I like both of them, I want to be with both of them, and I don’t know what any of it means and as much as that terrifies me, I’m so happy that I met them.”

They must have all been stunned but I couldn’t focus on them as my chest felt lighter but my throat constricted and I could feel my heart rate pick up. I slowly walked away from the oven and back to my original spot at the island. My hands crept onto the marble counter and I realized that my knees were wobbling.

“You know what’s funny, Isaac?”

Isaac jumped but eyed me.

“If you wanted to abandon me, you didn’t have to go to another continent. Mom and Dad managed to do it and I saw them every day.”

Then, the sobs broke from me and I pressed my hands to my mouth, trying to shove them back in but there was no point. My shoulders shook as I slipped to the ground, the pain barely registering to my brain as I hiccupped into my hands. The tears were hot as they ran down my face and everything hurt so bad and felt so good at the same time; it was like an emotional massage.

Everything that I thought and felt was finally out in the open and none of it was even real.

For a second, I thought a toddler was wailing at the top of their lungs but I almost started laughing again when I realized it was me.

This was it; I was going to be stuck in Cate’s head forever; alone and with nothing to show for it.

The first thing I noticed was something warm against my back. The second was a pair of strong arms wrapped around me. The grip was firm but non-threatening like the owner wanted me to know they were there. The third thing I noticed was Marie’s brown eyes staring back at me as she knelt in front of me.

I paused in my sobbing and sniffled. “Ar-are y-y-you r-r-real?”

“Yeah, I’m real,” she assured.

Her words made me freeze and I started trying to wipe my face, but Marie carefully grabbed my hands. Her thumbs rubbed the top of my hands, and I could feel my sobs slowing down.

“H-h-how’d y-y-you g-get h-here?”

“We found you and Cate and somehow got transported into her head,” Marie explained.

I sniffed, wincing at my congested nose.

“We got to go through a lot of memories, freshie,” Jordan mumbled behind me.

I tensed in their grip and out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Andre standing off to the side. He glared at my family with so much malice that my parents cowered next to Isaac.

I gasped. “Th-this i-is s-so embarrassing. H-how m-much of t-that d-did y-you hear?”

“We heard everything you told your brother,” Andre stated.

Marie placed one of her hands on my face. “Breathe, Y/N, you’re hyperventilating.”

It took a couple of minutes, but I managed to even my breathing and once I did, I felt like shrinking away from her and Jordan.

“I can’t believe you were going through all this and never said anything,” Jordan muttered.

I shrugged. “How could I? You, Andre, Cate, Luke, Marie, and everyone in Si Chi are perfect. If I was going to be accepted, I had to be perfect but now you all know that I’m a mess.”

Marie grabbed my other hand again. “Everyone’s a mess; it doesn’t mean something is wrong with you.”

“If we’ve learned anything by wandering around in Cate’s head, it’s that everyone’s a mess,” Jordan mentioned.

I shook my head. “Don’t say that to try to make me feel better.”

“I’m not.”

Jordan quickly rattled off everything they saw: from Cate and Indira meeting to Andre and Cate cheating to Jordan knowing about Brink drugging Luke to Marie killing her parents. Even though he was brief, everything hit an emotional nerve and it almost shook me back into being myself.

“So don’t act like you’re special or anything, we’re all screw-ups,” Jordan concluded.

“And just so you know, I don’t think that you liking me and Jordan makes you weird or bad,” Marie confessed.

At her words, I jerked my head back to Jordan. “You told her?”

“No, you said it while you were yelling at your brother!” Jordan exclaimed.

My face warmed at the realization, and I groaned as I buried my head into Jordan’s shoulder. This day could not have gotten any worse.

“Wait, you told Jordan before you told me?” Marie asked.

“I was going to tell you but then I got sucked in here,” I murmured.

Marie huffed. “Well, you’ll both have to make it up to me once we get out of here.”

Wait, both?

Marie couldn’t be serious; it would be impossible for her to agree to any of this. It didn’t make any sense, none of it did. That didn’t stop my heart from pounding faster though as I leaned away from Jordan’s shoulder to look at her.

Before I could say anything, Jordan and Marie both helped me to my feet.

“We’ll talk about this later, okay?” Jordan offered.

“Uh-huh.”

At that moment, Andre approached my family and they tried to scramble away from him.

“You should all know that Y/N is the best thing to come from you shitty people. If I see you outside of here, we might have some problems,” Andre threatened.

“Please, don’t hurt us,” Mom begged.

It was hard for me not to laugh as Andre slowly backed away, flipping them off as he went. I laughed a little as he came closer to us.

“Thanks, Andre,” I said.

“No problem. Does anyone know how we get out of here?” he asked.

“We have to find Cate; I saw her briefly earlier but I haven’t been able to find her since,” I admitted.

“If you found her once, you can find her again,” Jordan said.

“Not unless I find you.”

In an instant, my mom’s dining room turned into Cate’s dorm, complete with green accents and comfortable furniture. She sat on her bed, eyes bloodshot and downturned. Marie was the first to approach her and Jordan and I trailed behind her.

“Cate, I’m so glad we found you,” Marie said.

“You have to wake up,” Jordan added.

Cate shook her head. “I don’t want to. You all can wake up but I’m going to stay here.”

Marie frowned. “You’re going to die? But, there’s so much we can do once we’re out of here.”

“Yeah, we can expose what’s going on at the school but we need your help,” Jordan insisted.

No matter what anyone said, Cate remained unresponsive. Both Jordan and Marie tried to reason with her while Andre snapped at her for everything that happened. All I could do was watch and wonder if her behavior made sense. In a way, her entire world fell apart and she’d exposed everything in all of us. She must feel alone but what did she think would happen?

How could she incense me and make me feel sorry for her at the same time?

Finally, I stepped over to her and bent down so that we were eye to eye. “Despite all the psychological torment I experienced in here, all I can think about is what else you haven’t told us.” I swallowed. “Because I have a really bad feeling that if Shetty used you like this, she would use me too.”

“No, Y/N, Indira wouldn’t do that.”

“She’s been in your head since you were a kid, Cate, it would make sense that she would go after Y/N too and you wouldn’t notice it,” Jordan pointed out.

Cate hesitated and then looked at her gloved hands. “This is all my fault.”

“You can make it right but not if you stay in here,” Marie said.

I didn’t know how much time had passed as Cate mulled over her options. All I knew was as she was deciding, my heart continued pounding in my ears as the lightning cracked above our heads. My hands shook as the cracking got louder and louder.

Then, it stopped.

#black!reader #jordan li x reader #gen v x reader #limoreau x reader #marie moreau x reader

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labrxnth · 8 months

Text

Prison Break- Part 7 (Leon Kennedy x Reader Series)

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6,

CW: Slight Body Horror, Death, Suicide, Death Island Spoilers (obv)

WC: 5718 (oooo baby)

Summary: You and Rebecca Chambers reunite with the rest of the group to end this thing once and for all.

A/N: This is the end of the Death Island content. I have a few more chapters in mind to end this fic so buckle up :^). also the final battle might be a shit show and chaotic to read, but I literally sat down and wrote it as I rewatched it, so it's pretty much 1:1. Sorry if its a jumbled mess I tried my best.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* : ｡ﾟ☆. ───

The hallways were cold and isolating, a memory of the past creeping up to you as you and Rebecca ran down the hallway. Blue fluorescent lights blinked above the two of you and the concrete flooring did nothing but echo footsteps as the two of you proceeded deeper into the jail.

According to Rebecca, you and her were going to meet up with Chris, Claire, and hopefully Jill. Leon was off on his own, doing God knows what. You had an inkling that he went after Maria, and you were wise enough to stay out of that fight.

When Leon went off on his own for a fight, he meant business; punches weren’t held when it was a one-on-one fight. Maria signed a death waiver the second she ran off and had Leon trailing her.

Seeing as though Dr. Antonio Taylor was dead, the two of you needed a win on this mission. You were filled in on everything that happened while you were out of it, Taylor died while Claire tried to keep him from bleeding out. He was helpful enough to give her a thumb stick with something on it.

You hoped that the six of you would be lucky and it was a vaccine or something along those lines. But you were seldom lucky in this job.

“So, you and Leon,” Rebecca trailed off.

“Is running with me through an abandoned prison that boring?” You asked and chuckled.

“Kinda,” Rebecca replied with a giggle.

“Don’t worry, you didn’t miss anything. It’s new. As in, tonight new I guess,” You replied as the two of you made your way through another hallway. “For a prison, this place is a fucking workout to get through, Jesus Christ.”

“We should be almost there. We’re headed to the shipment dock,” Rebecca said, sending you a soft smile and a thumbs up.

The woman always knew how to make a room lighter with her smile and you missed that about her. Over the past year, the two of you had connected a bit, but not as much as her, Chris, and Leon. You didn’t want to intrude on their time together as friends, so you always made up an excuse to not go when you were invited.

It wasn’t that you never wanted to go, it was genuinely because you thought you would be an intrusion on a private party.

Their whole friend group intrigued you. Chris always seemed like a meat head to you, a meat head that knew his shit. He was always on and after being around Leon and going through a few missions, you knew why. It was hard to feel like you could relax in this job field.

Claire seemed like someone that you would be friends with in elementary school, then stick together forever. She always amazed you with how she wasn’t afraid to get straight to the point no matter what or who was in her way. Leon had told you that she was 19 during Raccoon City and your jaw was on the floor. You had a lot of respect for Claire Redfield and she wanted you to feel included in everything the friend group did.

Rebecca deserved so much more than she was recognized for. She’s done almost everything under the sun at the age she is. It honestly boggled your mind how her’s worked. On top of everything, she was just a sweetheart, humble and friendly.

Jill Valentine was still an enigma to you. Granted, Leon also just met her tonight so you had assumed that she wasn’t a party person. Given everything she’s gone through, you don’t blame her. You still technically hadn’t met her, being almost unconscious while she was in the same room as you. But maybe you would get to meet the enigma tonight.

All in all, their friend group was impressive and heavily relied on each other to shoulder the experiences that they had gone through. The few times you had gone to their get togethers, you appreciated how present everyone was and how warm and welcoming they were. It felt like a family.

Maybe after this mission, you would make it a point to go to more get togethers.

“So, catch me up on what’s going on. I still have no fucking clue,” You said. It feels like everything happened while you were out. If you were feeling like this, you bet the Redfields were just as lost, being infected longer than you were.

“We’re after Dylan Blake. He used Dr. Taylor’s findings to make a nanobot version of the

T-virus,” Rebecca explained.

“World ending again? Sounds like our kind of mission,” You grumbled. “We have to stop meeting like this, Rebecca,” You added, chuckling.

The soles of your boots hit the floor over and over again, echoing through the cold hallways.

“Agreed,” She replied. The two of you got to the end of the hallway and found a bolt head door. You put your muscle to use and got it open, holding it open for Rebecca as she ran through and closing it behind you.

Looking around, it seemed like a warehouse, almost like it didn’t belong in the prison. There were shipment boxes strewn around, forklifts, and other construction equipment. Your eyes darted to a catwalk where Jill and a man you hadn’t seen before, but could guess was Dylan Blake, were standing.

Jill’s gun pointed at Dylan and they were talking, their conversation inaudible from your distance. Closer to you were the Redfields trying to get up to Jill. As you and Rebecca ran to catch up, you heard a vent get kicked out and looked up to see Leon running on the catwalks.

He was running with the determination and confidence of someone that just won a battle; which you could assume he did considering Maria was nowhere to be found. His eyes locked with yours and he jumped down, scaling shipment boxes and he ran over to you.

As he got closer, you could see a black eye and a bruise forming on a very broken nose. Red tainted his lips, blood pouring from said broken nose. His hands found your forearms as his eyes locked with yours.

“Are you okay? How are you feeling?” He asked.

You scoffed a bit. “How am I feeling? You look like someone took a bat to your face. What happened?” You asked, your hands meeting his face.

As the two of you talked, you missed Dylan bringing his revolver up to his temple and pulling the trigger. His body staggered back, tripping and falling over the railing behind him and plummeting about 30 feet into the water below.

All you two heard was the splash of his body hitting the water and your head whipped to where the sound came from.

“We should…” Leon trailed off.

“Talk later,” You finished for him. He nodded and ran with you towards the rest of the group.

Jill was looking over the railing, searching for his body in case it popped back up. When she turned to talk to the group, your heart dropped. Looking between Leon and her, your brain was confused. Jill looked like her and Leon could be related, which did not help your eager heart.

You didn’t know what you were expecting from hearing the stories of Jill Valentine, but it was not the woman who was in front of you. She had a bobbed side part, brown and a little darker than Leon’s. It was easy to tell that Leon’s hair was just a matured blonde that had faded to brown, but Jill’s was more a darker ashy brown. Her eyes were blue, a softer, yet piercing blue, like Leon’s.

You would swear up and down that you didn’t have a type, but looking at Leon and Jill, you definitely did. Her whole demeanor read of a person much older than she looked; you made a mental note to ask her about her skin care regime later. She looked like she meant business and you had to remember that you were on a mission, not a meetup.

You could talk later, hopefully.

Jill’s mouth opened to say something, but the whole platform the six of you were on shook. A giant hand grabbed the railing and a monster rose from the water, giving all of you a good look at it.

It would be hard to try and describe what it was, other than a man and nature made horror beyond all belief. Leon had shared stories with you about some of the things he fought before and he had a hard time explaining some things. His stories usually ended with him saying something like “You had to be there, I don’t know how to describe it” in reference to a mutated dinosaur or alligator.

This world was fucked up and it fucked up your head some times.

Though you would’ve been lying if you said you weren’t a little jealous of him fighting a dinosaur.

Now, you knew exactly what Leon meant when he said those things because the creature in front of you was beyond any means of description. It was like if a whale sprouted legs like Kamajī from Spirited Away. It had a face almost like a doll, but also nothing like a doll because it was a melted skull.

Again, it was hard for your brain to process how to describe it.

The creatures roared, it’s ugly face opening and saliva going everywhere.

“Dylan used the virus to fuse with a bioweapon,” Jill said, her eyes never leaving the thing.

“Looks like we’re dealing with this first,” Chris huffed.

“Let’s do it,” Leon said, reloading his gun.

It wasn’t hard for your brain to process the arm sweeping the platform. Jill and Chris cleared it with a jump, Leon used the railing behind you to use as a step launch, you and Rebecca dove under the arm, and Claire being her somehow jumped and spun over it.

All of you easily cleared the arm, but scattered when it slammed down on the platform, causing the metal under your feet to crumble.

Jill and Chris got flung onto one side, Claire and Rebecca flung to another, sliding off the platform. You blacked out for a second, only to come to feeling someone’s hand around your wrist, holding you up. Your eyes looked up to see Leon holding onto a support beam from under the platform, holding the two of you dangling in the air.

Your head whipped to where the monster was and saw a crane next to it. Putting two and two together, your free arm raised up with your handgun, shooting the heavy metal hook off of the crane. It swung in the air, slamming into the monster and making it roar in pain. The metal hook got stuck in what would be the skull’s eye socket, blood spurting from the creature.

The monster whipped its head back and forth, trying to get free of the hook. Metallic creaking filled the air as the crane started to fall towards Jill and Chris on the ground.

Explosions went off on the right side of the monster and your eyes could make out Rebecca and Claire with rocket launchers on the ground.

Looking up, you could see that Leon was straining, trying to keep the two of you up.

“Drop me, I’ll land on the floor,” You said. His eyes met yours and you could tell he wasn’t mentally present. For some reason, he had the same look in his eyes when he remembered something from his past. Leon looked haunted, like he was reliving something from years ago.

“Leon, it’s okay, it’s a 10 foot drop,” You said.

His grip on your wrist tightened, his face scrunched up like he was fighting the memories from whatever he was going through.

“Hey, Leon!” You said louder, your voice snapping him out of whatever trance he was just in. He swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded, dropping you to the ground.

As the two of you were getting down from the support beam, grenades were getting launched into the creature, its side erupting in flames on the impact.

You rolled on impact, lessening the hurt to your ankles as the two of you landed. Leon stood up, helping you up and he ran his hand through his hair. Something he always did when he was stressed out a little too much without an outlet for it.

“Sorry, just…” He trailed off.

“Memories, I got it. Don’t worry about it,” You replied and patted his bicep supportingly. “We gotta keep our heads in the game though,”

Leon nodded and looked around. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw an army truck with a gas tankard on the back of it. “That could put a dent in it,” He said and pointed to it.

Your eyes followed his and you nodded. “Good eye, let’s get that thing running,” You replied. The two of you took off running as you could hear chaos behind you. Multiple guns, grenade launchers, and rocket launchers all going off and hitting the monster, only to fail.

Leon beat you to the driver’s seat, and instead of wasting time arguing, you sucked it up and got in the passenger seat.

“If you're driving, I get a gun, fork it over, Pretty Boy,” You said and held out your hand to him.

“You sure know how to treat me like a princess,” He grumbled and reached into his holster, handing you a lightning hawk magnum caliber handgun.

“Where the shit did you find this?” You asked as he started up the jeep.

“In the sewers. I was doing our job while you were asleep,” Leon said with a smirk.

Your hand turned over the gun in admiration, checking the chamber to make sure it was fully loaded. When you process his words you scoffed.

“I sure had a relaxing nap,” You replied sarcastically.

Leon drove the truck forward a bit, then hit the breaks. Claire and Rebecca had run behind a concrete support bar and were catching their breath, evading an explosion. Leon parked the jeep and stood up.

“Claire!” He yelled to get her attention.

“What?” Claire responded, her and Rebecca’s eyes finding the two of you through the smoke and gunpowder.

“You still have that password Taylor gave you?” He asked.

Claire pat the pocket of her jacket. “Yeah, right here.”

“Take Rebecca and stop those drones, we’ll keep him busy!” Leon said.

Claire and Rebecca were on their feet, nodding in agreement. As soon as the two of them took off, Rebecca turned back around to face the two of you.

“Don’t die!” She said, then turned back around.

It was unfortunate that the people in your life had to say that to you on a fairly regular basis.

Leon got back in the tuck and put it into drive, driving past the two girls and towards the monster.

“So uh, what’s the plan?” You asked.

“Jump when I tell you to,” Leon replied, smirking a bit.

“This is the last fucking time I get in a vehicle with you driving,” You sighed, watching the monster get closer and closer to the truck.

About 30 feet before the truck collided with the creature, Leon nodded at you. “Now!” He barked. The two of you swung onto the roof and ran along the truck towards the back. Your ears picked up the sound of a grenade pin dropping and you turned to see a grenade in Leon’s hand. His spare hand grabbed your wrist and the two of you jumped when you reached the end of the truck. Leon threw the grenade behind the two of you and pulled you into his chest. He rolled so that he took the brunt of the impact of the concrete floor as the two of you hit it.

Rolling a few times, the two of you ended up sprawled out on the floor. Leon still holding you close to his chest and you nestled between his body and the ground. The explosion came soon after, Leon’s shoulders hunching over as he flinched and the heat of the flames being felt by your legs.

“I’m getting too old for this shit,” Leon groaned.

“I didn’t ask you to be my landing pad,” You chuckled back as the two of you recovered, getting to your feet.

“A ‘thank you’ would suffice,” Leon said, dusting the soot off of his shirt. Your hands helped him, patting off the dust and debris.

“Thank you,” You said in a dramatic sing-songy tone. “My hero.”

Leon chuckled and looked to your left, seeing a crate. “Let’s see if we can find any goodies,” He said and ran over, you following close behind him.

The tankard did nothing but stall the creature for a few seconds, only making it angrier.

“Tell me,” You said. “The missions you had before I joined the D.S.O., were they always like this?” You asked, looting the various crates with Leon. Your eyes searched for ammo or any new guns, the Lightning Hawk being lost in the tankard explosion.

“Actually, yeah. The Arias thing was actually pretty straightforward, more than I’mused to,” He replied as his fingers unlatched a crate.

“You call almost getting squeezed to death ‘straightforward’? What is your life?” You asked.

Leon smiled a bit, exhaling a laugh. He found an automatic rifle with a drum in one of the crates and started pocketing any ammo for it. Finding a rifle of your own, you followed him towards the monster, climbing over various storage crates and shipping boxes.

The monster must’ve noticed the two of you and been angry about the tankard, because before you could even load rounds into it, a foot came crashing down onto the shipping container the two of you were on.

Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Leon get launched into the air as you fell towards the ground.

Taking the blunt impact, you coughed out a groan and got to your feet. Maybe Leon was right about being too old for this shit, you certainly felt like you were getting too old for this shit.

“Chris, Leon!” You heard Jill yell. Looking around, you couldn’t find Leon, until you looked up and saw him hanging from the rafters. You wondered how the fuck he got up there, then starting running towards Jill and Chris.

“What’s that?” Chris asked, looking up at where Jill was.

She was holding a big rail gun looking weapon on top of various shipping containers. “A plasma rifle,” She replied nonchalantly. “It heats up to 20,000 degrees, but it’s short range,” She added, struggling against the weight of the weapon, then kneeling down to get into a better position.

As she knelt down, she lined up the plasma rifle, then looked over at Chris and you. “Can you get that thing any closer?” She asked.

Chris scoffed and went to turn around. As he ran past you, you heard him mutter, “‘Can we get it closer’ she says.”

You ran up to Jill, jumping on top of the crates, and snagging another rifle as you made your way. Looking up to where Leon was, you saw him safely drop and slide down a broken catwalk, leading to an army jeep.

Thanking whatever sick and twisted deity was watching over you, you were elated that you weren’t getting into another death trap with the man you loved.

Jumping across more shipping containers, almost to Jill, your brain stopped working as it thought about the words you just used.

Loved.

The man you love.

Shaking your head, willing yourself to stay in the present, you made your way over to Jill who was charging up the plasma gun. She nodded in acknowledgement to you.

“I’m (Y/n), we haven’t met yet. I’m Leon’s field partner,” You said, aiming down your rifle’s sights and taking shots at the melted skull on the creature.

“Jill,” She replied, staring at the plasma rifle’s meter.

“Hell of a first introduction,” You added and smiled.

“It’s always a fucking shitshow, isn’t it?” Jill replied, chuckling.

Looking towards the floor, you could see Leon haphazardly driving the army jeep and Chris stationed on the back of it at the artillery gun. The two were trying to lure the creature closer to you and Jill, guns blazing in the process.

“Jesus Christ, you could not pay me enough to be in that Jeep,” You heard Jill mutter.

“Agreed,” You replied, continuing to take shots at the monster, trying to focus on the same spots Chris was.

Your ear picked up the sound of something charging and out of the corner of your eye, you could see electrical currents running through the gun. The monster had fallen right into the trap, surging towards you and Jill.

“Time to light you up,” Jill said and smirked, aiming the plasma rifle at the monster.

With the pull of the trigger, a white hot beam shot out from the gun, the force throwing both Jill and you back a few feet, your back hitting another shipping container. The creature roared and fell to the ground, its arm hitting the jeep Chris and Leon were in, sending the jeep flying. Chris and Leon went over the windshield and hit the ground as it flew in the air and hit the wall, crumpling.

Through the sound of metal crashing and explosions dying, you could hear Leon’s voice.

“Is that it?” He asked, exhaustion heavy in his voice. “Did we kill it?”

As the smoke and dust settled, you all could see the monster laying on the floor, seemingly defeated. As you went to help Jill up, you heard a splotching sound; the monster was back up again.

Jill scurried back to the plasma rifle as the monster recovered slowly, its eye set on the two of you. In that moment, if you could’ve traded places with anyone else in the whole world you would’ve.

“One… more… to finish ‘ya,” Jill said as she lugged the plasma rifle back into position. You helped her pull the rifle, lining it up to the creature, it being harder this time around with how exhausted and beat up the two of you were.

The plasma rifle started charging up again, starting from 0%. The monster was 20 feet in front of you two, slowly closing in.

“God damn it,” Jill said under her breath. You looked around, trying to see if you could see the rifle you had earlier, but it was lost in the various rubble and debris. “Come on, come on!” Jill said as the plasma rifle kept charging. The monster was about 10 feet from the two of you, it’s ugly face tracking you and Jill.

“Jill…” You said, your hand on her shoulder. Electricity surged through the plasma rifle as it was nearing close to being fully charged.

“Fuck!” Jill yelled as a giant foot crashed down on the shipping container, sending you and Jill flying through the air.

Upon impact, you did what you knew to do and rolled, but you felt two familiar hands stop your inertia. Getting your bearings, you could see Leon at your side, helping you up as he simultaneously pulled a handgun from his vest. “You okay?” He asked urgently.

“Couldn’t be better,” You replied, getting on your feet. Off to your side, you could see Chris helping Jill up, the monster making its way towards them.

Leon ran over to them and fired shots into the creature’s skull, only for the bullets to appear to be doing nothing to it, just like before.

Your eyes scanned the ground, for even the smallest handgun, only to remain unvictorious.

The monster’s head got close to Jill, Chris, and Leon, only for it to stop in its tracks and turn around, seemingly uninterested in the three of them.

Leon’s shoulders relaxed, bringing his gun down. “Huh?” He exhaled. Jill and Chris stared at the creature, ready for it to turn back around and decide that they were its dinner any second.

The four of you watched it pull itself along the floor, headed towards the water. With squishing sounds, it left a trail of blood and what could be only described as snail juice behind it.

Chris and Leon nodded at each other and made their way back to the jeep. Leon gently grabbed your bicep and dragged you with him, you relenting and getting in the passenger seat. Leon hopped in the driver’s seat and Chris manned the gun, just like minutes previous.

“It’s headed for open water,” Leon said, starting up the jeep again.

“Like hell it is," Chris said, reloading the artillery gun.

The jeep took off on the opposite side of the docks from where the monster, and unfortunately enough, Jill were. Your eyes caught that she was running with a duffle bag slung over her shoulder, set on something. She managed to get in front of the monster, dodging its legs in the process.

With a loud metal clanking sound, you also noticed that the gate was closing, no doubt thanks to Clarie and Rebecca.

“What’s the plan?” You asked anxiously, eyes locked on the monster.

“That’s for you to decide,” Leon said.

“Me? You’re the one driving!” You replied, eyes widening at Leon.

“Exactly! I’m the driver, you’re the planner,”

“The driver should know where the hell they’re going and what the hell they’re doing!”

“I know where we’re going,” Leon replied, a tinge defensively.

“Well there’s only one way to go! Forward!” You rolled your eyes.

“Could you two stop bickering like an elderly couple? There’s a case back here with a rocket launcher, military grade,” Chris cut in.

You and Leon stared at each other, then back at Chris. “That sounds like a great plan,” You said, smirking.

Leon parked the jeep, then jumped out of it, and ran around to the back to take the case from Chris.

Jill was still on the other side of the docks with the creature, now with a flare in her hand, yelling insults and exploits at the monster. You looked at her in awe, wondering and hoping you looked even half as badass as she did right now.

Chris stood above Leon, watching him try to figure out how the rocket launcher worked, making your confidence in them waver slightly.

“You know how to use this?” Chris asked. Your confidence halved.

“It’s got a trigger doesn’t it?” Leon shrugged. Your confidence was abysmal. Leon instructed Chris to put the two halves of the rocket launcher together and started to line it up.

“Hey, (y/n), help us line this thing up,” Chris said. The military level rocket launcher needed two people to man it, one facing forward, Leon, and one facing away, Chris. The person facing forward had the barrel obstructing their entire eyesight.

You rushed over to the two men, standing right next to Leon. “Do you just need eyes, or help lifting the damn thing?” You asked.

“Just eyes,” Leon and Chris both said at the same time.

“Tell us where the bastard is,” Chris said.

Your eyes panned over to the monster, then to the gate, seeing it lowering way slower than it should've been. An idea formed in your mind as you watched Jill dive into the water, the monster trailing after her.

It was a long shot, and had to be timed perfectly, but you could see Jill and the creature underwater, making their way towards the gate.

“Better idea, aim at the gate belt,” You said. “Leon-”

“Got it,” Leon said and got on his knees, his mind matching yours and your idea. Chris followed suit, the launcher resting on their shoulders.

Telling them to aim a little higher, and having Leon lift it even higher than Chris, you lined them up to the best of your abilities. Your eyes went back underwater to track Jill as you directed the launcher to the right slightly.

“Leon, I need you to fire as soon as I say it, not a second later,” You said.

You watched as Jill got dragged by the creature underwater a few yards, then cut herself free. The monster didn’t care about her anymore, only seeking the open water.

“Got it,” He replied, his voice strained from lifting the rocket launcher.

The monster jumped out of the water, surging forward towards the gate.

“Now!” You said.

“Fire!” Leon said and pulled the trigger. Him and Chris got jolsted back at the recoil, then put the launcher down, watching the rocket hit the gate belt. With an explosion,the gate came crashing down, cutting the monster in half.

“And that’s that,” Leon said, sighing. Chris stood up, rolling his shoulder blade and stretching.

Jill resurfaced and swam over to the three of you, pulling herself up onto the concrete floor. Chris rushed over to help her up as she coughed up water and got her bearings.

You heard footsteps approaching you and felt an elbow rest on your shoulder. You didn't even have to look to know who it was.

“I’ve only been doing this for a few years, I don’t know how you all have done it for decades,” You sighed.

“Honestly, I don’t know either,” Leon said, his exhaustion evident in his voice. “It helps that we’re all together. Saving the world sucks less ass when you have friends to do it with,” he added and chuckled.

You looked up at him and noticed how bruised his nose was getting. “Did you reset that yet?” You asked and gestured to his nose.

“No, why? Does it look that bad?” He asked, his eyebrows knitting together.

“Yeah, it looks like you got hit with a metal pipe,” You said, your hand gently grabbing under his chin and turning his face over, checking for other wounds.

“That’s actually not that far from the truth,” Leon replied and chuckled.

“Maria got you good huh?” You asked, a teasing smile on your face.

“Slammed my head into a railing three times, hurt like a bitch,” He said.

Your eyebrows raised, surprised that someone was actually able to get a hit on Leon. Over the past few years, you learned that while it wasn’t rare for him to catch a fist, it was rare for it to happen more than once in succession.

“She’s dead though, so it doesn’t really matter anymore,” Leon added and shrugged.

You let go of his face, wanting to feel the stubble again as soon as you let go. “Sounds like she deserved it,” You replied and chuckled.

“You’re such a people person,” Leon replied, chuckling as well.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* : ｡ﾟ☆. ───

The six of you loaded onto the B.S.A.A. helicopter, courtesy of Chris and Jill, and buckled up, ready to go home. You and Leon had managed to get into contact with Hunnigan who was, understandably, distraught at losing contact with you two then Rebecca.

Talking to her, you found out that Hunnigan actually helped Rebbecca with the vaccine and locating exactly where you all went missing. It was times like this that you remembered how cool and amazing your F.O.S. operator was.

Looking out the window, you almost didn’t notice Leon taking the seat next to you. He sat down and looked at you for a few seconds, his expression unreadable, before speaking.

“We need to talk when we get back,” He said quietly, so only the two of you could hear.

Your eyes met his and you nodded, knowing exactly what conversation the two of you needed to have. The exact conversation that you had been putting off for years.

“Yeah, we do,” You agreed.

“We have a while before the helicopter reaches San Francisco, get some rest,” Leon said.

“You too,” You replied, a hint of accusation in your voice.

“I’ll sleep as soon as you do,” Leon chuckled, his hands up in surrender.

The engine of the helicopter started up and the blades started turning. The six of you put on your headphones, the blades and the engine making it too loud to hear anyone else. As the helicopter took off, your eyes remained out the window, watching alcatraz slowly disappear.

Your head leaned on Leon’s shoulder, you finding it to be the most comfortable pillow you had at the time.

“Reminds me of New York City last year,” Rebecca said, her voice being picked up by all the headphones.

You, Chris, and Leon slightly smiled, remembering the mission to stop Arias.

While waiting for the helicopter, you and Leon had gotten caught up to speed, being informed how Dylan Blake took over Arias’s crime syndicate and teamed up with Maria. He promised her revenge for Leon killing her father and they used Dr. Taylor’s research to engineer the nanobots responsible for spreading the strand of the T-virus that Dylan had.

“If I hear Glen Arias’s name come out of someone new again, I’m slamming my head against the concrete,” You mumbled.

“You’re getting grumpy, you need to sleep,” Leon said.

“Im 33, not a child,” You said, a frown on your face. “I don't ‘get grumpy’.” You added.

“You can say that all you want, still doesn’t change that you need to sleep,” He replied.

“....fine…” You grumbled and shifted a bit, getting comfortable.

Rebecca giggled, her gaze locked on how your head was resting on Leon’s shoulder and a soft smile on her lips. A year ago, she clocked it, asking you about you and Leon, while killing time in the helicopter while the vaccine spread through NYC. Specifically asking if you two were in a relationship. At the time, you only blushed and tried to steer your conversation in a different direction, assuring her you two were just work partners.

Now here she was, seeing the two of you act like you were the only people in the world.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* : ｡ﾟ☆. ───

#resident evil fanfic #leon kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x reader #resident evil fanfiction #leon s kennedy x you #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #slow burn

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spookyspecterino · 9 months

Text

Just finished the main quest for Starfield and I have many feelings. And those feelings are manifesting themselves into fic ideas.

I guess there isn't really a point to this post other than to get my feelings down in writing and see how it compares to everyone else's.

I've put them all below the cut for those who don't want spoilers.

Ok yeah.. so where do I even start?

The fact that you get split up from your followers and in the new universe everyone is kinda ??? about you. I get it, I do, but like... that hurts so much. I feel so empty. I spent hours and hours talking to them, doing their quests, getting to know them, and bonding--and poof, I'm alone in a universe where none of them are the same and I can't grow close to any of them again.

And at the end, in our original universe, Sam is encouraging us to go into the Unity even though he knows we probably won't end up together in the next universe... BETHESDA that's not ROMANTIC that's TRAGIC. It was like a gut punch hearing Sam say we would miss each other till the end of days but had to do this anyway--and then to say he's bringing CORA, too? HUH?? You're going to not only take her away from her mother and grandfather, but also throw a 12 y/o into a new universe ALONE???

Some things are going to change in my fics, I tell you what. All of it doesn't sit well with me.

And the absolute hollowness of the new universe!! A little bit into it and I'm sitting there going I WANT TO GO BACK, PLEASE LET ME GO BACK. It just feels like the whole thing is entirely NOT WORTH IT.

I've lost Sam, I've lost Cora, and all my other companions. The emotional disconnect from the new universe companions leaves a GIANT hole in my heart. I am hurting. What is the point??

All this has done is inspire me with the most heart-wrenching angst fics I've ever thought of, and to start the whole game over again. Don't get me wrong, I LOVED this game up until this point. And I like how they're trying to do this death/rebirth motif and the impact you the player has on your world. EXCEPT, if you want me to keep playing, the companions are a large part of what made the game good for me and everything after has felt oddly lazy--like they gave up trying to make the game unique and meaningful after. The 10 different NG+ differences are fine. But still empty, and you're left with busy work in the form of artifact collection. I really regret going to a new universe, but the whole game, and your followers, are all pushing you to do it--so the game is pushing you to do this, but for what? I was so excited for the possibilities for what comes next...but it fell so flat for me. At least I can channel this pain into writing fics.

...Ok, well... rant over. If you've gotten this far, thanks for reading this jumbled, emotional mess. This isn't meant to be a review either, just my perspective. So if you enjoyed this NG+ aspect, I'm genuinely happy for you. Let me know what your thoughts were on the end of the game, or if I've missed something crucial and I should keep going with my original character.

#starfield #sam coe #Yeah this is kind of a rant #But it comes from a place of love

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eclipseaotters · 6 months

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I keep coming back here the moment I’ve read about Jimin and Jungkook enlisting together via companion system. I was thinking about how there’s so much I’d probably like to say about it. But every single time I try writing my thoughts, nothing comes up.

The truth is there’s just nothing I need to point out or reiterate or dissect. They applied for the program, got accepted, and Hybe has officially announced that they really are enlisting together as companions.

The whole thing in itself speaks volumes already. And I’d love to permanently place this enlisting-as-companions as my fave jikook thing ever, but it feels kind of disrespectful to two very real individuals—who are making very real life decisions—to lump this among other moments we know, because this one’s really not at all meant for anyone but them.

In all honesty, there’s no amount of hickeys, GCFs, ear sucks—basically anything—that can top this one. To me, it’s not up for discourse anymore. I don’t care what they are or what their actual relationship is. The very real fact is that they wanted to enlist together.

I’ve had a cousin ask me about it. Jungkook-biased, not a shipper, more of a Y/N but not delusional, who doesn’t know I’m a Jikooker. “Why did they go for it?” She kept supplying answers to her own question, based on what she got from Tiktok—mostly the tattoos thing; to finish at the same time; same hometown. I kept patiently debunking misinformation, but never once told her the most obvious reason: they just…wanted to. And I realized that it’s actually pretty hard to reach to that conclusion unless you at least believe Jimin and Jungkook have a special bond. It’s hard to rationalize something that big.

Because it IS big. I’ve read a couple of canon compliant fics with enlistment in it. Never has the companion system been a part of it, because that’s kind of too idealistic for fic writers, isn’t it? And a lot of people, like me, aren’t even aware of it. What do you mean you can make my ship be with each other for the entire enlistment? Let’s be realistic.

But oh gods is it real. I still can’t believe it. Sorry, it’s all a jumbled mess. My thoughts are all over the place. I’m just so glad they have each other and I had to let it out.

#jikook

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arminsumi · 8 months

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it's disheartening for writers to see "part 2 when??" comments, you know why?

because there's a lot of effort and thought behind one post. it takes far less time to read than it took for us to curate it.

the idea comes, we pen it down. then we look for inspiration to build upon this idea. we make notes on dialogue, pacing, structure. we highlight important aspects, underline the main feeling and hidden messages and subtle details we want to incorporate. we make sure everything aligns with the character to make sure they're not ooc or two-dimensional. and that's just the beginning stages of one fic idea.

then we write it. now for me, personally, when it flows easily i take two hours to write. but then there are some fics that take months. actual literal months. because the idea does not flow easily, but i hold onto it because i know it has potential. then i write multiple versions, sometimes they're 1k+ and i scrap them, all 1k+ words in the trash, just to make a "better" version which will go into the end post.

then we continue writing it, and some fics that get big wordcounts make us nervous because of all that editing and proofreading we have to do, which alone will take a long time. for me, editing can take more time than actually writing it. i have so many finished pieces in my drafts that aren't published or stay untouched because there's a complex jumble of 5k words that i need lots off energy to meticulously edit. errors, misspellings, restructuring. editing is sometimes such a nightmare that it deters me and then fics get avoided.

then there's the final touches. the banners, the warnings list, the layout, the aesthetics, etc. sometimes making banners takes a long time because of finding the right pictures and editing them too. or finding color schemes/combos that please the eye. a lot of artistic effort goes into post layout alone. there's so many tabs open it's a mess, and i constantly open and close and reopen and close, various sites for various tools to make everything look proper and neat and good for the eye and pleasing to the mind. and let's not even get started on the warnings list. it's probably my least favorite part, because i have to be very careful and proofread with a sharp eye to make sure i don't miss something that could cause the reader to accidentally have an uncomfortable experience.

and then it's published.

this baby post raised in the drafts, something that we put so much thought and care into, and now can you imagine the frown a writer makes at "part 2" comments? this whole post took a long time to make, and to just ask for more makes us feel like we're not satisfying you enough or we didn't do enough even though we did everything. it's appreciated that you enjoy it and want more, but it's still disheartening and even discouraging. imagine if you went up to your favorite author after reading their book and said "when is the sequel?" without saying anything else. it's weird. it makes us feel bad.

so please try to refrain from asking "part 2 when??" and maybe say a simple "i like this because xyz" or appreciate something about the post. even two emojis can give us an idea of how much you liked it or what you thought of it.

reblogs and comments or any feedback on the content we made is so super appreciated. writers want to know what you thought, it's fun to see reactions or understand what aspects you enjoyed. engagement is inspiring and motivational.

#i rlly went on a rant sorry lol #but i just been seeing a lot of this part 2 stuff around #and it kinda gets to me so i thought i'd speak about it #👍

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claymorexpunisher · 1 year

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Together We Make Magic (18+ Fic) (Pt.5/5)

DISCLAIMER: This is NSFW. If that's not your thing, keep scrolling. I try to tag my work appropriately, so if you choose to click on my work regardless, use your own discretion. Thank you for the love always and enjoy!✨

Pairing(s): Roman Reigns/Fem. Reader

Summary: Theory crosses the line and Roman decides to make him pay...

Tags: 18+, misogynistic language, age gap, smut, violence, unprotected sex, size kink if you blink.

Word Count: 2,720

‘’You see what happens when you talk to me, and we put our heads together? We’re great at schemin’!’’ I asked Roman as we laid in bed in our hotel suite that night.

I giggled as he playfully rolled his eyes before he reached his hand down and cupped my ass, making me gasp.

‘’I could think of somethin’ else we’re great at…’’ He murmured, his eyelids drooping with lust as I began to grind my hips against his thigh.

I shook my head, chuckling breathlessly as Roman’s jaw slightly dropped and he let out soft panting breaths as my hips ground harder against him.

With a swiftness I wasn’t expecting, I was suddenly laying under Roman, and I licked my lips as he looked down at me, his eyes scanning my silky lingerie with appreciation.

‘’Are you gonna undress me… or do I have to get someone else to do it?’’ I poked, smirking as Roman’s eyes began to twinkle in amusement.

‘Yeah… maybe I will.’’ I huffed without any real annoyance or malice in my voice.

Roman’s eyes flared as he began to reach for his boxers and pushed them down.

I ground my hips in even more eager motions when I felt his hard cock nudge against me as he set it free from his boxers.

‘’Nah… you won’t. You know why you won’t?’’ He said in a low tone that held a mixture of seduction and cockiness.

I was bluffing and he knew it.

I was just about to answer, but his touch between my legs cut my thoughts short.

My lips quirked into a soft smirk at the almost hypnotic feeling of Roman all around me.

I took in the minty scent and flavor of toothpaste as our tongues tasted one another and the comforting weight of his body pressed against mine and I could only moan softly against his lips as I let it all consume me.

My body shuddered as Roman slowly slid the thin strap of my nightgown off my shoulder, exposing my breasts and the air hit my taut nipples.

‘’You won’t because you know there aint another man on god’s green earth that can make me feel the way I do…’’ Roman murmured as he began planting soft kisses and nibbles against the column of my neck.

At his words, I reached between us and guided him inside me, both of us groaning as he finally sunk into me.

I let out a shuddery moan of his name as one of his hands squeezed my breast, pinching my nipple as he slowly began to move.

I answered his touch by wrapping my legs around his waist and bringing him in as deep as I could.

I wished I could just melt into him and bask in this feeling forever…

‘’Was that a yes?’’ Roman’s voice rumbled against my chest as he leaned lower toward my breast that he was still holding and he brought it to his mouth, making my vision go hazier and hazier as his tongue and his cock worked their magic on my body.

‘’Yes!’’ I moaned after my brain and my mouth finally caught up with one another.

‘’Can’t hear you, babygirl…’’ Roman taunted.

He lightly bit down on the hardened bud and his hips picked up speed, turning any coherent thoughts into a jumbled yet delicious mess once again…

(Prev. Part)

#roman reigns #roman reigns smut #roman reigns x female reader #roman reigns x reader #roman reign #roman reigns fan fiction #wwe fic #wwe smut #wwe fanfic #wrestling fic #wrestling smut

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know-the-way · 1 year

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Continued Stages of Falling Down the Miss Fisher Rabbit Hole

I’m gonna be real - I wish I could watch things in chronological order, I really do, but my ADHD brain just doesn’t work like that. So, I’ve bounced all around the different seasons and my overall thoughts are a jumbled mess. However, there are some things - in chronological order - that I just continue to go feral over the more I look at them, so I’m gonna share with the class. (P.S. Thank you so much for the warm welcome! You’re all very lovely and I just hope I don’t fuck that up by being annoying 😅… Uh… yep. Anyway, have a nice day! Lots of nonsense and a wee bit of meta below!)

- “Perhaps we could allow ourselves one candle?” “I think I could cope with that.”

Mmhm, listen here you cheeky fuckers, I see you. Whoever wrote this show learned the art of subtle symbolism and slow burn majesty, and while I am HERE for it, I also just… ya know… *pushes heads together* kiss already.

- Hearing Phryne say “I’m looking for my daughter” when she was searching for Jane in Queen of the Flowers. *clutches chest* Owwww. Her progression from “ugh, kids” to “this one’s okay, I guess” to “she is a part of me and to wrench her away would be akin to removing my very heart.” Just… yes. I will always love that dynamic. But I also appreciated Phryne emphasizing that Jane’s mum would always be her mum. I feel like there’s normally a focus on the child needing to choose between their biological or adoptive parents and it was refreshing that they allowed room for both of those relationships with Jane to exist equally.

- Maybe it’s just me, but whyyyyy does this exchange feel so domestic? There’s something about Jack just sitting there, marveling at her being in her own element, telling Hugh “of course” when he asks if Phryne knows judo (‘cause he knows her well enough to not be shocked anymore - like ‘of course she knows judo and speaks 8 languages and flies planes, it’s common sense Collins, get with the program’), and already knowing the answer to his suspicion about the “dangerous weapon.” It all just has an air of ‘gently teasing my spouse of 10 years in front of people because I know it winds them up and that’s our love language’ about it.

I’m also kind of curious how long Phryne has been practicing martial arts. Was it a ‘from childhood’ thing or a ‘from a traumatic event that made learning this skill feel necessary’ thing? If that fic hasn’t been written yet, I’d love to read one.

- “This time, you’re an accomplice. And unless you plan on killing Inspector Robinson yourself, he’ll make sure you hang.”

Again… I could so easily be reaching, but to me this comes off very much like “once my husband finds out what you’ve done to me, he will spend every waking moment ensuring your demise.” Couple that with Jack carrying her out like Prince Fucking Valiant and… yeah. #FERAL

- The fact that he wasn’t already holding her hand, but she was reaching for him… 🥺 The hurt/comfort goblin that lives in my brain: thriving. Just… fuck me up.

I still have two episodes of season 2 to finish, but so far my overall summary is that - by episode 3 - they’re together. Together, together. Don’t even care that it’s not “official,” don’t care that they don’t say it explicitly… they’re committed to each other in every way that matters, so they are bloody together. Just need them to realize that and accept it. For all our sakes.

#mfmm #i’m in a glass case of emotion.gif

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writerlyhabits · 1 year

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White Christmas

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female reader

Word Count: 4.7k

Summary: The Holiday season catches Bucky by surprise, but after a less-than-ideal morning, a friendly invitation from his new neighbor is more tempting than he would have anticipated.

Prologue to the Neighbors Series | Masterlist | Ch. 1

Warnings: language, festive holiday things (I tried to keep it very vague so all celebrations could be filled in), talk of wartime and Bucky’s past, I think that’s it…

AN: Happy Holidays!! I was watching White Christmas – one of my favorite Christmas movies, if you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend it – and the opening scene made me think of Bucky and how he might react. I thought of his neighbor showing this movie to him, and then did the math backward from the timeline of my series and realized she moves in right around Christmas time… so this is the fic that happened 😂 Set before chapter one, you don’t have to have read any of Neighbors to be able to follow along, but there are nods to later chapters if you have.

Thank you @deceiverofgodss for listening to my rambling, ily 💛

Bucky let out a sigh of relief when he got all the little app icons to jumble around the way google had said, finding the app he’d just been using and tapping the buttons in the corner. Yes, I want to delete the app.

It had been about a month since he’d been given this new life, and it was… still an adjustment. The Wakandans had been more than generous, Shuri and Ayo seeing to it directly that he had everything he needed. They organized the pardon trial, went through hoops to find him a decent lawyer, and helped him settle into the apartment the government had set up for him. Shuri, in fact, had scolded him when he tried to tell her he’d find the place on his own, saying something along the lines of him being too stubborn for his own good.

It was very reminiscent of when his family had dropped his sister Rebecca off at school in Indiana. Ayo had told him they’d already prepped the place with everything he would need to get started, Shuri had excitedly whispered about a new tactical suit she’d hidden in the back of the closet – “just in case… you can never be too prepared” – and then they were gone.

Bucky had been required to start weekly therapy sessions as part of his pardon, and begrudgingly – by court mandate – he went each Saturday morning to hear comments about finding out who he was again. It was exhausting.

It had started with the haircut. He hadn’t lasted two weeks before the shoulder-length mess drove him crazy. Though that wasn’t fair… it wasn’t the length that bothered him, but the reflection in the mirror. His codes were broken and his life was in his own hands, but the Winter Soldier seemed to be staring back at him everywhere he looked.

The short hair was an adjustment to say the least. But he had stepped out of the barbershop feeling lighter, like a new man. And the face that looked back at him was one he hadn’t seen in a long time.

That being said, it had also directly led to a plan that was most definitely one of his worst.

The last time he had truly been James Buchanan Barnes was back in the 1940s, notorious for being popular with women. So when that cocky confidence surged back up again, he had the not-so-brilliant idea to try it again. He thought that if he went back to being the ladies' man he once was, he’d find himself.

A horrible decision, that one.

Having no clue where to even start, he took to searching on google “How does dating work in the 21st century?” Which had him downloading a dating app. The one that he was getting rid of this very moment.

It had done nothing but confuse him further. He couldn’t take a good picture of himself to save his life and had worse luck creating a description for his profile; in hindsight, “James. 105. Still don’t know what to put here… I think I’m better in person” probably wasn’t his best move.

Most of the girls thought he was trying to be funny, and were disappointed when the following conversation proved otherwise. Some girls took his profile as an invitation to talk about a number of things he wished he didn’t understand. And a handful of them… well, he didn’t think he could blame his poor excuse of a profile for the pictures he’d been sent, but it happened nonetheless.

The dates he had been on were filled with nothing but meaningless small talk and modern nuances he didn’t understand, leaving him with less and less of the already dwindling monthly check he’d gotten as part of his pardon. It didn’t take long for him to come to terms with the fact that groceries cost far more than they did in the forties, and that his three thousand dollar army retirement wasn’t exactly the sum it used to be, especially when rent took up so much of it. Maybe he shouldn’t have turned Murdock down when he’d suggested they fight for more…

No, he didn’t need to be selfish, he would get by. It had saved him from having to deal with any more of the loud crowds of press or the looks people gave him in the courtroom, which was why Bucky had told Matt ‘no’ when he suggested they could get away with more than a retirement rate based on outdated economic values.

He’d certainly survived on less when he was in Romania. He’d be fine.

Bucky approached the top of the stairs that deposited him in front of his apartment, returning from the last of his lousy dates as the app in question disappeared from the screen. Good riddance.

As he went to put his key in the lock, he heard steps behind him coming down from the floor above, and he turned to glance over his shoulder as his door clicked open, pleasantly surprised when he found you descending from the floor above.

You had on a flattering sweater and looked very put together, as you always did, except it didn’t look like it offered you much warmth since you kept your crossed arms close to your body as you moved through the building. In another time, he’d leap to offer you his jacket or make some quippy remark about keeping you warm. He’d have to be blind not to admit you were a very pretty girl, one he would have gone after back in his prime…

But he wasn’t that man anymore. Not by a long shot. Who he was, he had no idea, but the James Barnes of his past was not who was standing before you in the hall.

You gave him a warm smile as you made eye contact, and he returned it with a friendly grin of his own.

“Hey! James, right?” You asked sweetly, and he nodded in confirmation as you fished your own keys out from the pocket of your jeans. “Funny how we seem to keep meeting like this… You at your door, me at mine,” you joked as you gestured between the two of you, and it genuinely made him laugh.

“Such strange places for either of us to be. We can’t keep seeing each other like this,” he tossed back, your airy giggle filling the landing. You were the first person all day that he hadn’t minded starting a conversation with. He didn’t know you all that well, he’d only seen you in the building a handful of times, but your interactions always left him with a smile on his face – in comparison to the rest of his daily encounters, that was a high compliment. “Making more banana bread rounds?” He asked only a little awkwardly, gesturing up the stairs you’d just descended from as he tried to keep the conversation going. .

“Hm? Oh! No, not today,” you answered, a little uncertain yourself. At least, that’s what he could guess from your posture, picking at your hands as you kept them in front of you.

“That’s good. I don’t need any competition for your leftovers,” he joked, earning an amused grin.

“Is that so?”

“Are you kidding? That was the best banana bread I’ve had in eighty years.” You laughed out loud, your face scrunched up as you threw your head back. At least it had come across as funny because he wouldn’t have known how to play it off otherwise. “I may or may not have polished it off in one sitting,” he continued when your laughter had come back down to a chuckle.

“Oh gosh, I’m glad to hear it! I’ll have to let you know when I make another batch,” you smiled, the warmth in your voice practically reaching out and taking hold of him, and he couldn’t say he minded.

“Please do.”

The conversation hit a short lull – though shockingly, not an awkward one – and he feared whether this would be the end of it. Something about you made it easy to open up a little bit more, and he liked branching out from talking to either his therapist or Mr. Nakajima; neither of those conversations were easy, but unfortunately required. You were different.

Before he could worry too long, your brows shot up on your forehead as you came to some sort of realization. “Oh, hey! What are you doing for the holidays?” you asked excitedly.

“I uh… I won’t lie, I hadn’t even realized Christmas was coming up so soon,” he admitted. “I don’t really have any plans.” He could confidently say that was the understatement of the century, having lived through most of it.

“Well, if you need somewhere to go, I was gonna do something Christmas Eve. Just, y’know, make some snacks and put on a few holiday movies,” you shrugged, and for a moment, Bucky genuinely didn’t know how to respond. “I’m new to the city so I haven’t found my people just yet, but nobody needs to be alone during the holidays.”

When Bucky met you, he had opened his door to find you smiling directly at him, handing him a plate of banana bread muffins, and introducing yourself as his neighbor across the hall. And now, only a few days later, you were inviting him into your apartment to celebrate the holidays. He hadn’t been graced with this amount of kindness in a very long time, and it was more refreshing than he was prepared for.

“Is anyone else coming?” he asked slowly, not quite sure what to do with himself and this wave of emotion that had hit him.

“Uh, well I’ve been knocking on other people’s doors kinda asking the same thing,” you started, gesturing to the stairs you’d come down from a few minutes ago. “A lot of people are traveling, or have other plans. Or, you know, are lying to the stranger who just invited them to her apartment a few floors down.” Your comedic shrug made him chuckle under his breath, and he liked how easily you put a smile back on his face.

“So it’d just be you and me?” Did that realization make him nervous? This whole interaction would be a hell of a lot easier to navigate if he could just understand what the hell his own feelings were doing.

“That’s what it looks like... if that makes it too weird, that’s okay! But if you’re an introvert like me and like that there won’t be people there, my offer still stands.” Now it was your turn to look at him a little nervously, completely unaware that he could tell, waiting to see if you would end up having to spend the holidays alone.

In that moment he realized that you were just two lonely people. One in need of a little extra kindness, and one with that much extra to give, conveniently placed right at each other's doorsteps.

“I’ll be there.”

When Bucky knocked on your door a few days later, you answered in a cozy-looking sweater, leggings, and tall fuzzy socks with festive patterns on them. He started to feel a bit nervous about the stark contrast of his leather jacket and gloves – more specifically, about what he would say if you asked about taking them off – but the warm smile that spread across your face managed to ease his worries. For now.

“Hey! Come on in!” You beckoned, holding the door open wider and turning back into the apartment, allowing him to follow in after you. “I’m glad you came over, I’ve been here all day and I just… well, human interaction could do me some good,” you laughed, and he chuckled with you.

“Don’t mention it. I’ve been there, it’s… I’m glad to fill the position.” You smiled sweetly as you flitted through the space to the kitchen, and he took a second to take in his surroundings while you were occupied.

Your apartment had a different layout than his, your front door dropping him directly into your open living room on his left, and the decently sized kitchen separated by a half wall of counters to his right. It was hard to judge precisely how large the space was as the only things in the room were a couch, a TV sitting on a dresser that definitely wasn’t in its final position, and a neat arrangement of cardboard boxes in the middle of the living room. And yet, despite the lack of living this space had gone through, it was far more warm and inviting than he was expecting. Even so early on, it felt like a home.

You had an assortment of foods and snacks jumbled together on the countertop closest to him, and he watched as you pulled a few more dips and toppings out of the fridge. He had half a mind to laugh at the comical amount of food you had prepared for just two people, but he was a super soldier whose monthly expenses were starting to make him count his pennies... He could make a sizable dent in your selection without even trying, and leave only feeling a little bit guilty.

“Sorry for the mess,” you started, stepping around a different stack of boxes piled in front of your cabinets. “I definitely thought that I’d have plenty of time to make my apartment look presentable by now, but I underestimated how much crap I have, so… I’ve made my peace with the cardboard coffee table for now.”

“I mean, you’ve been here how long, maybe two weeks?” He asked, and you nodded as you popped a loaded cracker into your mouth. “I’d expect you to have a cardboard coffee table still. It’s only a small change from the three pieces of furniture in my living room.”

“Three? How long have you lived here?”

“About a month,” he answered with a tight-lipped smile, and a small grin appeared at the corner of your lips. “To be fair, I didn’t really have anything when I moved in, so it’s… a work in progress.” You nodded in understanding as you pointed at him with intention.

“Well, that’s different! Having to furnish an apartment is expensive, it takes time. Organizing the hodge-podge of shit you’ve collected over the years is less forgiving,” you explained, and he laughed when you rolled your eyes at all the boxes still surrounding you.

Bucky was still trying to figure out how he wanted to settle into your space, but watching you be so candid and casual within minutes of his arrival was like a palette cleanser. Sure, maybe you didn’t know about the vibranium hiding under his left sleeve – nor that the history associated with it was his to claim – but watching you pick nonchalantly at the finger foods displayed between you was slowly eating away at his unease. You were relaxed and comfortable around him…

It was a nice change.

“Help yourself, don’t be shy! Eat as much as you like, I’m sick of reheated leftovers, so if you don’t eat them now you’ll be taking them home,” you ordered pointedly as you stepped back into the living room, leaving him chuckling quietly to himself. “I’ll go ahead and put on something festive… Do you like old movies, James?” you questioned as you reached for the tv remote.

“Define old movies…” he offered cautiously. Catching up on the pop culture of the last seventy years had been a daunting task he’d barely scratched the surface of.

“Like, really old. Classic Hollywood, from the forties and fifties.” Thank god…

“Yes. Yeah, I do. They- Yep, those are my favorite,” he fumbled, grateful that he’d at least know how to steer his way through most of this conversation. You looked ecstatic at his answer.

“Have you seen White Christmas?” You asked excitedly.

Dammit.

“I uh- no, I haven’t gotten to that one yet.”

“What?” you asked incredulously, sounding offended as you snapped your head around to look back at him. “Oh, we’re watching it right now, you’re gonna love it.”

Bucky raised both of his brows as if to ask if you were serious, a playful expression tugging at his features, winning him over when you gave him a sly grin before turning back to find the movie on your screen. What was he getting himself into…

“It’s got some big names, too. Rosemary Clooney, Bing Crosby, and … shoot, I always forget his name…” you trailed off, fidgeting your fingers in concentration. He spared a glance up at you as he waited for you to figure out what you were trying to say, only to see a familiar face appear on the screen as you selected the movie. Well, somewhat familiar.

“Is that Danny Kaye?” He piped up, remembering that painted smiling face from posters when he was younger.

When Becca came home from school in the summer of what had to be 1940, his family had driven up to Manhattan. As a treat, their parents had bought tickets to a show at the popular nightclub there – La Martinique – to see none other than Danny Kaye and his wife perform. It had been earlier in his career than whatever this movie was you were trying to show him, but if the smile on your face had anything to say for it, the vintage actor’s career must have done pretty well after the Barnes family had a chance to see him.

If he only had a nickel for each time he’d seen a celebrity in the 40s end up doing well for themselves. One for Danny Kaye, one for Howard Stark… That money could’ve at least bought him a soda to enjoy while being promised flying cars – and he was still waiting on those.

You snapped your fingers and pointed back at him with a wide expression of relief. “Yes!! Danny Kaye… Ugh, he’s so good in this.”

“No kidding. I’ve seen him in- uh… in other movies,” he started, recovering weakly from almost letting a detail slip that he very much would not have been able to explain. ‘I watched him perform in person over 70 years ago’ wasn’t exactly a shared experience. “My interest is piqued. Let’s see if it’s as good as you say,” he teased, happy when you hadn’t caught onto his blunder and shot him a smug look.

“It will be.”

…

Bucky didn’t know what to expect from your classic holiday movie, but opening on a scene from the front lines of the war hadn’t been anywhere close.

“Christmas Eve, 1944.”

That was a date he’d remembered living, having spent it similarly to what he saw on the screen. The Howling Commandos had banded together in their temporary camp, pulling together any bits and pieces they could to decorate one of the smaller trees growing just inside the perimeter. The men had shared traditions from back home, sang holiday carols, and kept Dum Dum Dougan from doing anything too outlandish. He definitely kept Steve on his toes, acting as an oversized mother hen to the whole group.

“God, some of them are just so young.”

Your voice took Bucky out of his thoughts, looking up to see your gaze locked on the screen with a commiserative expression. Your eyes followed a young soldier in one of the back rows before you turned back to look at him, becoming a little sheepish as you attempted a smile.

“I know that sounds ridiculous. Like, they’re not actually out at war, he’s just an extra in the background, but…”

“But it happened.”

He’d seen those boys come in. As Sergeant James Barnes of the U.S. Army in 1943, he’d seen men of all ages come into his responsibility as privates, the war encouraging an influx of men enlisting, himself included. Some of his men had wives and families they were fighting for. Some of them were around his age, having nothing better to do with their “able bodies” than surrender them to their country’s use.

Some of those boys were freshly eighteen, enlisted mere days after their birthdays, and dropped in his hands. He’d even seen some as young as seventeen, having managed to get away with lying their way into the army, and each one of them made him feel more and more anxious about Steve’s ability to succeed at doing the very same thing.

“I think people forget about that, sometimes,” you continued, your gaze back on the screen as you looked through the crowd of soldiers in between the crooner’s solo shots. “Just how young, or even how human these soldiers were.”

He felt a lump start to form in his throat at your sentiment.

“Obviously I know that these guys aren’t actually out on the front lines,” you continued, a small laugh escaping as you gestured toward the movie. “But I just… it makes me think about the soldiers who were actually out there and the lives they had. Their loved ones, wives and children, friends and girlfriends they might have left behind. What they went through when they were out there…”

You paused, and when he studied the tight-lipped smile you were giving him, he knew you were trying to stop yourself from getting emotional. It caused a strange sort of tug of war in his brain, instincts that had been long since dormant wanted to prevent your tears, keep you happy. And yet, he was baffled by how moved you were by stories of these soldiers…

Soldiers like him.

“Sorry, this- I know this is silly, but-”

“I don’t think it is,” he offered quickly, and his train of thought was momentarily derailed when your sparkling eyes caught his – apparently the power of a pretty woman’s crying eyes still had an effect on him seventy years later.

He may not have been that same suave ladies' man anymore, but he wasn’t about to deny the fact that you were a very pretty woman, one that the old James Barnes would have been pushing people aside to ask you for a dance. He was old, not blind.

“Really? Getting all sentimental about people who don’t really exist?” You snarked, trying to laugh it off.

“But some of those men – the actual people – don’t have anyone to think about them like this anymore. Its… I think they’d appreciate knowing someone remembered their efforts.” He needed to stop and collect his thoughts for a moment, dancing on that line between his truth and the white lies he’d been telling so as not to stand out as a 105-year-old war veteran.

If you kept looking at him like you could see into his soul he’d be spilling his guts in no time. He wasn’t ready to be seen like that, not by anyone, not by you. You were the only person he had actually wanted to talk to, he liked getting to know you, getting to relax for two fucking seconds without being holed away from the rest of the world…

He couldn’t risk losing that. Losing you.

“I- I hadn’t thought of it that way,” you contemplated, pursing your lips as you reevaluated your emotions. “What made you think of it like that?”

I’m one of them.

Yeah, that wasn’t an option.

“Uh, my dad, I think… he was in the Army before I was,” he started, which wasn’t technically a lie. But with the exaggeration, it gave him a moment to reflect on the truth, and remember those moments with his father so many years ago. “He was able to come home early after being wounded overseas. But even years later, he would look at the young men in their uniforms with this look in his eye… like he was taking the time to understand them, care for their situation like he wished he’d had someone to do for him.”

George Barnes had never been a man of many words, especially not about his feelings. But that didn’t mean he hadn’t shared his stories with his children and passed on the legacy he’d carried with him through his service years.

And now haunting the conversation Bucky was boring you with now. Way to be a sad sack, Barnes.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring the whole mood down,” he tried, giving you an apologetic grimace, but your expression only softened.

“Stop, you didn’t bring anything down. Besides, I started it,” you shrugged, and he couldn’t help but chuckle nervously. “So, you said you’re in the Army?”

Did he say that?

He did.

Shit.

“I- well, I was. I’m uh… I’m not now.” Oh this was going fucking swimmingly. “I was discharged,” he finished awkwardly. He was tempted to just walk out your front door. Empty stomach, empty hands, dignity in shambles… but his identity intact.

“Oh, okay. Do you mind me asking what happened?”

Every muscle in his body was telling him to run. Get up and bolt out the door. But what good would that do him? You were his Neighbor. He couldn’t go far, and even if he escaped this conversation now, he would still see you in the hall between your apartments.

Bucky was stuck. If he ran, your friendship would be strained. It was even a friendship yet, it wasn’t anything yet, and he would ruin it. But if he stayed, one more slip could mean you finding out who he was. And what then? Would the Winter Soldier come back to ruin this for him anyway?

“I was… medically discharged,” he started, his throat tight as he forced himself to say something. Maybe if he kept it vague, he stood a chance at making it out to see the light on the other side. “There was an accident. I uh… well, I don’t usually talk about it.”

“I’m so sorry, I- we don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. I didn’t mean to pry,” you rushed to assure him, mere moments after he’d fumbled his way through an excuse. He felt like he’d just run a marathon, his heart thumping wildly in his chest as he realized he’d somehow made it through. You were now the one sitting awkwardly, fiddling with your hands once again as you wracked your brain for a change of subject, some way to backpedal towards common ground.

The two of you had that in common.

“It’s okay, really. Besides, I started it,” he tried, throwing your words back at you with a small grin. A strange sense of ease washed over him when you laughed, relaxing back into your seat and sparing a glance back at the television screen.

The division had just finished singing a heartfelt song to their general – much more emotional than he wagered the average man of his time was capable of expressing, but that’s a Hollywood adaptation for you – when the sounds of explosions became much more prominent, men running for cover this way and that. It was, unfortunately, a familiar scene.

“You have to watch this!” You cried, quick at attention once you realized which part of the movie you were in. “It goes by quickly, but it’s important!”

“Alright alright, I’m watching,” Bucky smiled, welcoming the topic change as he settled on the couch next to you, watching this scene you deemed so important before he set out to tear into the snacks on the counter.

Much to his own surprise, it was really nice. If someone had told him a month ago that he would thoroughly enjoy himself as he watched a movie on his neighbors couch, he wouldn’t have believed you. But he also wouldn’t have been able to anticipate that the neighbor in question would sing along to all the songs or gush about the sway of the women’s skirts – he listened as you described your dream dress in great detail, and he hung onto every word. “Something just like this pink one Judy has on, but maybe in a darker color? Like a dark blue…”

Bucky wouldn’t have believed he’d be laughing over a plate of appetizers as you mocked the nasally blonde side character, or stopping himself from spitting his coke everywhere when you rattled on about just how “freakishly tiny” Judy’s waist was – your words, not his. He’d even found himself comfortable enough to open up on his own, avoiding any conversation coming close to his complicated past, but he liked being able to talk with you about things he was familiar with.

He’d helped you set up your record table when he brought it up on accident, relieved when you offered to give him a tour of your collection when it was a similar interest. And, having moved into aiding with handiwork around your apartment, he was quick to offer his super-solider enhancements to get the dresser moved at least to the right room. You tried to insist he didn’t have to, but when you watched how easily he accomplished it, the protest fell quietly out of the conversation.

He liked being useful. He liked making you laugh… Mostly, he liked feeling like himself again. Whoever he was, it felt good to be someone he didn’t mind seeing in the mirror.

Maybe he’d run into you in the hall more often.

Thanks for reading!! If you’d like to be notified when I post a new fic, be sure to follow @writerlyhabits-library + turn on post notifications! 💛

Masterlist | Ch. 1

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #neighbors #neighbor!bucky #neighbors series #james buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #white christmas #christmas fic #holiday fics #holiday season #kam speaks

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4m1 · 2 years

Text

𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 ❝ 博客; 𝘦𝘥𝘥𝘪𝘦 𝘮𝘶𝘯𝘴𝘰𝘯

𝐂𝐇.𝟏

summary: y/n was always there, or at least it had felt that way. she had slipped into hellfire and made it her home so quickly, that no one batted an eye when she began to frequently hang out with them. becoming one of them, she was simply there, coexisting as they did. and as jeff’s relative, it had become a silent rule that no one was to mess with her. but when she’s supposed to be in love with Gareth, knowing she'd never have a chance with eddie, she's torn as she find herself slowly falling for their energetic leader all over again. and as he struggles to come to terms with his feelings for her, their simple friendship begins to become a little more…. complicated.

word count: about 4k

a/n: this is my first fic in like 4 years and i’ve been in a writing slump lately, so i apologize if it’s horrible. i also will make this a series and it will be a slow burn. i def want to make more eddie fics too. this also does not follow the canon timeline of the show.

also i have decided to give “freak 1/unnamed freak”(the other older member of hellfire who is never called out by title) a name because he deserves recognition too, seeing as he’s their friend and is the bass player for corroded coffin. that being said, he’ll be called vince, because he looks like that’d be fitting.

───── ❝ ❞ ────

Today was just like any other, of course. Nothing exciting was happening other than the usual parading and performance that Eddie had to offer the whole student body. The sound of his onyx boots stomping along tabletops and sarcastic monologues were enough to earn a few hoops and hollers from the likes of you and Dustin. Both earning a wide grin as the ringleader of your cherished “cult” turned in your direction, using these encouragements to fuel the ever so bright, and dramatic, flame that allowed him to have the spirit to do things as such. I suppose that was one thing you always admired about him, how free he was to say and do as he pleased, no matter which eyes picked him apart. How he never really seemed to care how others viewed him, and if he did, he sure a shell didn’t show it. Eddie was so much braver than the whole lot of you, and that was probably why he was the leader. He was the defender, the dungeon master, the shepherd.

And you were happily in his flock.

“ Heyyy, y/nnnnn, are you going to eat that? “ Dustin beamed, with his usual loose mouth smile, eyeing the mash potatoes you aimlessly sloshed around.

“ Eat up kid. “ You muttered back, pushing the tray towards him. Reveling in the joy that seemed to paint the freshmans face as he dug his spoon in, melting into his seat as he scarfed the white gunk.

When you had imagined moving in the middle of nowhere, to some state you had never heard of from the city that never sleeps, you didn’t imagine you’d end up in a group of teens who played some geeky board game for fun. It was a much different environment from New York, especially the fact that the schools weren’t as cliquey there.

But you had no room to complain, growing rather fond of your distant cousins' friends. Well, more fond of some than others, you thought with a lithe sigh, eyes wandering to torn flannel and flowing cedar locks. Watching as Gareth threw his head back in a hearty chuckle as he murmured with Jeff, eyes lit as his mouth moved passionately.

It was a lie to say you didn’t initially join because you found the male attractive, hoping that faux interest in DND and a place in the group would earn you a place in his heart. Though, that was far from the case, seeing as your mind shut down at every interaction that even-somewhat sparked between the two of you. Words jumbling and falling sharply from your tongue whenever he uttered a word to you, face flushing, and hands dripping with thick sweat. Not only was it gross on your part, but the air would go stiff with awkwardness, usually drawn back by Dustin saving you hopelessly or Eddie unknowingly intervening. You were sure it was obvious by now, your apparent feelings towards the brunette, but silently prayed that he was clueless as most of them men at the table were when it came to women.

“ You know it’s not very gentlemanly to steal food from a fair mistress, Henderson, now don’t you? ”

This piqued by the one and only, the great and glorious, the oh-so outspoken, Eddie Munson. Though, you’d never allow his ego to hear of the silent praises and nicknames you gave him in the quiet of your mind.

Earning a scoff from you, which helped him to paint his usual smug grin on his face, knowing that you were about to retort back. Seeming as though he loved when the two of you would go back and forth, but he’d never admit it.

“ For your information, I am not some damsel in need of your help, Lord Munson. I am fully capable of defending my mashed potatoes on my own. “ Turning your nose up at him for the full effect, accompanying it with the cross of your arms, playing it up to the fullest. Adding a small ‘hmph’, which caused his smile to widen. He couldn’t help but adore the way your energy aligned with his, one of the only people who came close to acting as he did. And it left his breath labored at every word you said.

But that was the way one felt around friends, that’s what made friendships so special… no?

The metal head couldn't remember when the two of you became friends, or even how. But he found that was the beauty of it all. There was no memory of you coming in, it was like you were always there, like you existed always in his life. Like you were meant to be, sent to him by the universe. And the way you fit in so perfectly, and adopted Hellfire as your own, he had no doubt that you had been sent to him.. to them, he meant.

Placing his elbows on the table, leaning closer to you, his movements drawing your eyes back his way.

“ Well when do you need saving, princess, don’t come crawling back to me. “

Your stomach tightened at the way he lowered his voice, rasping it out with that smartass expression he sported often. Though, you wouldn’t let him see it, taking a hand to his forehead and pushing him away from you playfully. Retreating your limb back with a giggle as he took a bite to the air, acting as if he’d snag your fingers.

Little moments like this are what Eddie looked forward to in life. To hear your laugh, see you smile, feel your touch. Little moments with his close friend.

Cool metal ate at your burning skin, hot from the flush of anticipation of a proposition in your love life. Setting your scorched head along the door of your locker, a satisfied smile painted on your lips.

Gareth had just asked you if you wanted to come over to watch Corroded Coffin practice, seeing as they were learning some news songs to display at The Hideaway. Even though you had tagged along with Jeff before when he went to practices, this was different, seeing as the brunette had gone out of his way to invite you, which had to mean something, right?

The frustration and uncertainty of it all just caused more heat to rise to your head, aggravation seeping into you as you gathered your things to leave. A familiar figure shifting along your peripheral, adorned in inky leather and a wild mane. Perched beside a head of bouncing auburn, ponytail swaying as the two talked.

A strange sensation pooled in your gut, chest coiling in itself at the sight of the two polar opposites. You found it rather interesting that Eddie had started hanging around Chrissy, seeing as they came from two very opposite sides of the social hierarchy. Even more odd was how close they had become, despite her friends despising “the freak” and the fact that Munson publicly spoke out against the “populars.” Though, it was none of your business.

Even so, you couldn’t help it.

To notice the way he looked at her, how his eyes seemed to trace the softness of her features. Or how intently he listened to her, seeming to crave more of her voice once she’d stop. How he’d soak up her laughter and vye for that reaction again. The way they seemed perfect together, their chemistry with one another, undeniable, swoon worthy and sickening.

They way he knew she was perfect.

And even worse of all, there was no reason to hate it. To hate her. She was so kind, a sweet soul. No ill intent sat in her spirit or cruelty lining her thoughts.

You didn’t know why it made you so upset that he seemed to feel this way towards her, but if anything, you should be happy for him. Right?

He had found someone who was gentle and sweet with him. Someone beautiful and deserving, something you knew you’d never be.

And perhaps, that's why you denied the blooming feelings for the man. You knew you weren’t enough for him, how could you be? You were a freak, just like him, and he deserved more. Someone more kind, more beautiful, more successful, someone unequivocally perfect, like her.

A flame rose in your throat, charring the chords of your voice to oblivion. Your cheeks steamed up again and you took heavy breaths, attempting to halt the tears. Trying your hardest to not allow the droplets to burst from the seams of your eyes.

You had no reason to be crying. Eddie was never yours, and he never would be.

If anything, you should’ve been happy, finally having had a smooth conversation with your crush. Finally the possibility of being happy, of being loved. So then why… Why did this sadness swell in your depths? Why did you have to cry.

It was your run of the mill insecurity, that was all of course. A laugh managed to slip past your lips at the thought of the tears being caused by anything else. This wasn’t about Eddie or Chrissy,this was about you feeling insecure about yourself, that was it. The slight idea that maybe you felt anything more for Eddie being shot down at every turn the thought took in your mind.

Any-who, there were much bigger things to worry about at the moment, such as the view that began to fill your vision. Two figures mingling along the open garage of Gareth’s home, instruments being set into place. It was hard to suppress the smile that bore into your cheeks as the flannel fitted male waved at you, a smirk on his features.

“ Why do you look so happy? “

Whipping your head to look at the dark skinned male as he wore a look of confusion, eyes narrowing to attempt to figure you out. You had noticed this was a habit of your cousins, doing it often, seeing as he was always edging into your business.

Earning a roll of your eyes as you hopped out of the van.

“ Nothingggg, Jeff. What, I can’t be happy now? “

Throwing an uneasy glance at you and a look of disgusted-confusion, shaking his head as he dropped the matter rather quickly. A muttered “women”, accompanied with a sigh, wafting through your ears as he passed you.

It was understandable that he found oddity in the way you acted, seeing as you were mid-sob when you arrived in the parking lot. Scurrying like a mouse in hiding to the passenger seat, crying into your backpack so bypassers wouldn’t have to witness the embarrassing display. Met with a violent shake of the shoulder and Jeff’s worried face. Then further putting him through chaos with slurred, hyperventilating words that seemingly flew in one ear and came out the other. Eventually mustering it all up to your period, knowing he wouldn’t pry any further at that. It’s not like he would’ve understood anyways.

“ Soooo y/n, Jeff here tells me that you’ve been learning how to play guitar. Eddie’s not here yet and he’s usually early, so you wanna sub in for us? “

It was unbelievable. This wasn’t actually happening, it was like something out of a movie. Gareth the Great was sitting in close proximity to you, eyes plastered in your direction, attention fully drawn to you.

Feeling the warm sensation rise in your stomach again, averting your eyes downward as your fingers find a way to fidget amongst themselves.

“ I-uh, I don’t know, Gar, I’m not that good. I probably don’t even know the songs you guys want to play. “ Meeting cedar eyes again, which crinckled as the boy beside you chuckled, taking a hold of your hand as he began to stand. His warmth against yours makes your head whirl in a frenzy of hormones.

“ Oh c’mon, I bet you're great. “

Shit, he was late. Which didn’t happen often, so he knew the guys were sure to chew him out about it, especially with their gig coming up soon at that bar. Resting his head against the wheel of the van with a groan as he parked the vehicle, eyes screwed shut in new found annoyance. The last thing he needed right now, was his friends to be some pain in the asses.

Slowly lifting his head as he heard the symphony of heavy instruments wafting together in a harmonies clash, but more than that, was the voices that snaked their way into the sounds of string and symbols. To say the singing was angelic would be an overstatement, though the passion that the voices held was something different entirely. It sounded like joy and youth, anticipation and excitement, all bundled up in one to scream the lyrics from a rock-metal soul.

The only odd thing about it was that it was a song that their band had never practiced before, seeing as they didn’t have any RATT songs on their setlists.

The words became more clear as he approached the garage with his stringed baby in hand, gawking at the sight in front of him.

“ You see I really felt that you want me

You see I really thought that you cared

I had this feelin' she was comin' from somewhere

You've got everything, more than it takes, baby “

The two cousins shouting the lyrics raspily as they both worked on their respective guitars, Munson's eyes quickly falling on the feminine one of the two. Mesmerized by the way your lips seemed to dance ever so closely to the mic, or the way your finger frolicked along the chords. How your face glistened as sweat gleamed along it, soaking the rowdy bits of hair to your forehead, that managed to fall in your face through all the movement. Lids screwed shut as you continued to play, absolutely submerged into the music. Eddie was at a loss of words. The way you became one with it all and how free you seemed when up there. His awe quickly drew to a close as the drums began to stop abruptly, pulling everyone from their session to look at him.

“ Look who finally managed to join us. “ Muttered the umber skinned male from beside you. An unamused look being thrown at Munson. Who replied with a nervous laugh, scratch of the neck and the explanation that he had to catch up with Chrissy about some stuff.

The mention of her name drew you back to the events of earlier, brows furrowing at the remembrance of your breakdown. Quickly shaking it off as you took deep breaths. You would not allow this to ruin the fun you’d been having. Still coming down from the high of the music, every sense in your body electrified.

Which didn’t help when you all had finally taken a break, hands brushing along Gareth’s as he offered you a beer. Taking it was a gentle ‘thanks’, attempting to distract your mind from all the interaction you had been gifted with him today. Attempting to take a large swig from the bottle, trying not to allow yourself to get flustered as the drummer roared praises over your performance.

Hissing as the glass clanked along your front teeth, causing you to throw a hand to your mouth in pain. Setting the Genesee along the concrete, both palms now drawn to your maxilla, fingers running gently along the smooth white bones to make sure there was no chipping. Even if your teeth were okay, the pain still rang horrendously, causing your stomach to feel sick as embarrassment soon set in. Though that seemed to be the last thing Gareth was worried about, cupping your face as he examined it with a distressed gaze. The way his eyes searched yours frantically, or how his plush hands softly held you, the way his dark brows furrowed, or the gentleness of his voice as he asked of your state. It all seemed to make this worth it, wishing you had 100 more beer bottles to smash into your teeth.

It had seemed that the other guitarist and bass player had quit chewing Eddie out for his tardiness, and they had all shot their gaze to the scene of you two. Without the needed context, it appeared as though the two of you were to meet in a loving embrace of your lips on one another, and Jeff was NOT having it.

“ DUDE! ARE YOU TRYING TO KISS MY COUSIN!? “

You were both unsheathed from your moment with one another, immediately having Gareth retract his palms away from you and throwing them up in a defensles manner. Words falling past his tongue as stutters as he attempted to explain himself. “ D-Dude, what no! I was seeing if she was ok, she, she hurt herself. “ Though, it was too late for the poor goner, your relative was already halfway into his ‘remember what I told you guys about trying to mess with y/n’ speech.

Shocked as you felt a pair of strong arms swoop in at your waist and whisk you in the opposite direction. A chin rested on your head as one of the limbs wrapped around you pointed at the brunette, the all too familiar playful voice, potent to your ears.

“ How dare you, try and defile a fair maiden such as she. “

Met with Eddie’s grin as you looked up, watching him thoughtfully peer down at you. His mouth snaking closely to your ear, the warmth from his mouth causing a jolt in your body. “ Looks like you did need saving, princess. “

God, h knew just how to piss you off. Twirling in his grip so your chest met his, though you didn’t calculate how close he really was, face mere inches from yours. Seeing as it shocked him as much as it did you, the two of you going still in the embrace. You could feel his breath on your skin, feeling as it mingled into your air. At this length, you could see every detail of the man. The roundness of his doe eye, though anything but innocent. The strands that widely grew at his brow or the small remnants of shaven hair along his upper lip. The plumped pink that sat below those remnants. The ones you couldn’t pull your eyes from. And he noticed, how could he not? The way your gaze fell to his mouth, slowly moving back up to meet his oculi again once you’d seen the smirk he now wore.

“ My God, l/n. Are you trying to seduce me? “

You didn't know if it was the ache and yearn of the throbbing between your legs or the annoyance of the fact that one of the only romantic moments in your life had been ruined by a man you were related to and made worse by a man you could never have, but something about the usual light-hearted teasing made your blood boil. You knew this was his nature, the way he went about, but you couldn’t handle it now.

The fact that he was probably screwing around with girls he dealt to, or the chicks he’d pick up at The Hideaway, and still made you heart flutter with his flirtation, made your anger worse.

No not probably, you knew. There had been times before where you and the other older teens had spent time at Mr.Munson's mobile home, having sleepovers and what not. (No matter how childish it seemed, you all enjoyed it.) Or simply spending time with Eddie in his room. Gareth, Jeff, Vince, and you all having stumbled across fishnets, makeup, and more underwear than you could count. Having to have sit beside a new girl every time as they piled up in the back of his van as you all rode back to his place after their performances. The vivid memories of your head set along the back of the couch, eyes locked shut as your fingers danced along your thigh, listening to the muffled moans from his rooms and the soft snores of the other boys wrapped in fleece along the floor. Not being able to drift to bed until the sinful noises had stopped. Usually waking to Eddie plastered beside you, snoring as his shirtless body splayed across the scratchy green fabric, his usual blanket draped across you. You used to think it was romantic, that he always found his way back to you no matter who he was with that night. But now you saw it for what it was, you were always the rebound, despite the fact that it was never romantic, which somehow made it hurt more. Once those girl had ran away as thieves in the night, he stumbled back to the girl he knew would be waiting for him, as a stupid mutt that adored their owner. You were his dumb, stupid bitch.

The anger of these truths allowing you to pry him away from yourself, glaring at him one last time before spinning around. The same thundering in your throat from earlier, rising up again in a storm of wild emotion. Picking up your pace as you began to walk out of the area, ignoring the beckons of your name from the metalhead. Now jogging your way through the crisp lawn, past Jeff’s van and off into the beating autumn sun. Burning on your frame as hot as the liquid that burned the skin of your cheeks, burning as the pain in your heart from a love that never was.

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