#am I even breathing anymore

[uncanny-tranny]

It's always, like, mildly annoying when people see a het trans couple and go "all that work just to be straight?" like... one, you don't know if they're straight and two, trans people don't owe you a queer sexuality to "make up" for the fact we're trans. Transhet people aren't a subtype of trans people, they're members of the trans community, and the queer one if they so desire!

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #mtf #nonbinary #and i don't really vibe with the word microaggression but it's very that #like it just comes across like people think trans folks owe them queerness and cabaret preformances y'know? #and we cannot *be* if it means the way we are being isn't this carefully curated version people have of transness + queerness #and it can kind of warp your desires and understanding of yourself because you *want* community and to be seen and to be allowed to just be #this isn't universal and the 'you' is impersonal. i am aware this is a broad range of experiences and not everybody can/does relate #my overall point is that it's probably not the best move to act like this toward trans people #maybe i read too much into this but it's just something i have seen over and over and over and over . . . again #shoutout to the real ones (heterosexual and/or straight trans people or people in straight-presenting relationships 👍) #back to playing the lelda of zelda (is it bad that i don't even call her zelda anymore i just go 'THERES LELDA!!!') #it sounds wrong to call her zelda now 😭 #the LEG OF ZEG. SWORD SKORD???? BREATH OF THE WEATH!! -my brain 24/7/365

[theunmappedstar]

isn’t it such a gut-wrenching feeling to know the people you no longer have contact with – those people who only started out as strangers, but now they’re strangers all over again – actively look at the same moon.

#we’re alive at the same time - so how am i dead to you? #we don’t even talk anymore yet we still share some things #we look at the same sky we breathe the same air #i wonder if they think the way i do #i wonder if they wonder daily #or perhaps i do not exist as a thought at all #issa nattie thing

[virgothozul]

Ok. I have listened to the people. I have watched the thing. It is very wholesome.

Kazu comes home. He is hopeless and tipsy. And he swings between excited and wasted.

#I am SICK of Miri’s voice ngl #I know kids are loud. And make a mess of EVERYthing. That’s why i stay away. #But for Kazurei ; I made it to the end #They are precious #Rei is so cute I love this guy #He has 0 human skill and still is effortlessly hilarious and a little cutie 👏💖 #i wish we had more of their relationship bc they have sth really special #They never question their trust in each other like it never crosses their mind. They disagree almost all the time but they never part #It’s more natural than breathing. They’re always saying stuff like « it’s not fit to involve other people in our way of life » #it’s not even an option to live apart. They clearly will spend all their lives together #Except that scene it’s so weird when Kazu says « hum with Miri gone we don’t have a reason to live together anymore » lol man #Not as if you guys were already joined at the hip before meeting her. But I get the «the family life changed us now sth’s missing #and it feels incomplete ». But still guys. You are soul mates. #Also the « of course he comes with me. He’s my partner. » line 💕💍 #even if at some point they meant to part ways ; really they can’t be separated. #kazurei #No homo daddies #Buddy daddies #kazuki x rei #Domestic gays

[foxgloveinspace]

People jumping ship cause of the new masks is very ahhhh. Telling. Tbh.

#very much so #tell me you where only here cause of the looks without telling me your only here cause of the looks #listen. I miss the old masks already too. that’s not the point. #you can mourn for something without that taking away your joy for it. #‘it’s all moving so fast’ iii has been turning red since July. #‘they’re evolving too fast’ or we just got here later then others. #‘I can’t even listen anymore’ sucks to be you. the music that has been put out hasn’t changed so I don’t understand this one #‘they’re gonna get cancelled over this’ ok. I guess this is just thinning out the people who were real fans and who where fake fans #I’m gonna be a sleep token fan til the end. if this is the way they want their image to go? I’ll follow. if we get heavier music next? #sounds fucking amazing to me. (I listen to heavier stuff anyway). #idk I just think it’s so so so fucking telling. that if your jumping ship cause their Live Performance Aesthetic has changed… you didn’t #mean it when you said sleep token was important to you. #like I’m 100% MOURNING the old masks. I am BMO with Finn’s old hair sobbing about the old masks. #but I know this too shall pass #this is how I fucking felt about Vessel’s mask change #and to everyone going ‘what about Vessel and the Chior!’ #1). VESSEL HAD A MASK CHANGE EARLIER THIS YEAR!!! he isn’t gonna change masks again so fast those fuckers r expensive! #2). the choir did have a change?? they wherent wearing robes at all and where in body chains they looked amazing #I get we are all neurodiverse and hate change but take a deep breath before you renounce all your sleep token love #I’m guessing Vessel will get a new mask in April again. for the kick off show. #tonight was a closing show. and he didn’t FEEL GOOD. I wouldn’t be surprised that if he was gonna do something with a new mask #if he pushed it back because he didn’t feel good. #he performed a whole show while we could TELL his throat was hurting. fuck. #I want to wrap him up in a warm hug and give him hot water with honey in it. #idk I’m rambling. it’s just telling.

[thaliagrayce]

y'know what we don't talk about enough? Hazel died. We talk about how she grew up in the 30's and 40's and we talk about how out of place she feels in the modern world, but! She died! She was dead! She has spent more time dead than alive, and not by a close margin!

How does that effect a person??? We got some of it in the flashbacks, but once those caught up with her present timeline and she shared them, they just kind of... disappeared. And she was a regular girl with some weird past experiences. That's one way of doing it, sure!

I think it would have been a lot cooler if she was just a touch creepier. If she felt a little bit Wrong. Yeah, in general she's more approachable than her brother, she's more sociable and less closed off, but. If you actually spend any time with her, it can be difficult to tell which child of the underworld is actually more unsettling.

Hazel is bright of personality and has a dazzling smile, but sometimes she'll just... shut down. She'll go completely blank for like half an hour and nobody knows what to do with it. Sometimes she forgets she's alive. Sometimes she'll spout the grimmest shit you've ever heard like it's nothing, she won't even notice it's weird until the room goes quiet. She spent decades in Asphodel, which is designed to make people forget about themselves and wander around for eternity, only she didn't have the luxury of forgetting! Wild! After she comes back to life, sometimes she forgets that she's allowed to Do Stuff now. She can spend so long sitting and staring at nothing. Sometimes she'll start crying on cloudless days because it hits her again that she can actually feel the warmth of the sun on her skin and she can hear birdsong. Every little mundane experience is a blessing and she will make you remember that in the most foreboding way possible.

#hazel levesque #hoo #mj talks #like. i am fascinated with characters who die and come back different and it JUST hit me that there was so much potential for hazel there #the idea of how death lingers was not explored At All in heroes of olympus #of course there's the obvious part in that there were what. 3 named character deaths total? 4 if you count leo #which i very much don't because it didn't stick! there were no consequences to this gigantic war! #the first series did well with that because we had plenty of named characters who died #even though some of them were introduced only to die like six chapters later. we still knew them on some level #and more importantly percy knew them. he felt their loss in a way that made consequences seem real #heroes of olympus didn't have any of that. hazel could have been a great way to talk about it a little more! #also i just love characters who have obviously gone through death. that has to change a person! tell me how it changed you! #anyway. i think i'll make hazel creepier from now on in my writing #she deserves it <3 #nico is creepy in an obvious way. he's got power over death and that clings to him like a second skin. he can't hide it #and he's learned that he doesn't have to. there is power in being othered #hazel seems lovely when you first meet her! none of the death power all of the glitter and gold and riches #and then she'll look you dead in the eye and say 'you really don't know how lucky you are to be able to breathe until you can't anymore' #and move on like it's nothing! what! #underworld siblings

[journeyman-tier-fibercraft]

Knitting repeat 37 out of 40 on the lace shawl for my cousin’s wedding present

#knitting #lace knitting #lace rot #wip #knitblr #in the process of trying to remove the heavy breathing sounds (because my phone was basically in my mouth to get this angle) #i went through 5 different websites and 3 audio editors #all because my cellphone doesn't let me mute videos anymore even tho it used to let me. #tag before last should've said video editing programs instead of audio editors i am eepy #the pattern i'm knitting is free btw #bamboo wedding shawl by purl soho on ravelry #i just have to rewrite all my patterns out by hand to keep track of them repeat by repeat

[slutdge]

how i feel when i remember i can overdose and die any time i want

#if i still feel like relapsing this badly by sunday im just gonna do it lol whats even the fucking point anymore #imagine the person i couldve been if my life wasnt like this. i couldve been worth something. i couldve been valuable. #what a waste of fucking space and breath i am lol

[majestyjun]

mille 0.0 u doing okie? should i call jjuni up and tell him to calm down ???

OH NO

#oh my fucking god i am literally IM LITERALLT GOING TO JAIL #FOR THIS MAN LJTERALTBEJJSHSHDNE #he needs #HE DID IT FOR ME #no no no HE DID IT FOR ME #oh my god #this man #god i NEED HIM LIKE #HIM DOING THIS #but likegehensns tied up but still teasing Ggshdnsbsna #SHIT IM LITERALLYGOIMG TO #i need like someone to knock me out rn #i am I AM GOJNG TO #can’t even bREATHE ANYMORE #no he had to have done it for me #shdjwmamsheiak

[spaceratprodigy]

one of my favorite things abt how faith reacts to max in fallbrook arc is her being directly faced with her own hypocrisy

#I am a faith apologist but also she's whack fr #like girl you haven't been honest about yourself or your past either 💅 #she's very evasive when she's the topic of conversation #not that she outright lies but she avoids questions or answers as vaguely as possible #just because she kinda learned early in Edgewater the consequences of her trying to be truthful about her life #and how unglamorously people react #figured adopting the mysterious persona and isolating herself was her only option #because phineas was the only person she could talk to the only person who understood to some extent what she was going through #and to add to it.. #her own history with violence and anger #and even tho she became a very numb quiet distant persom because of her own past #halcyon got it's hands on her and cut her deeply and awakened a certain fire in her for better or for worse #excluding how often she has to defend herself for a variety of reasons and how it makes her feel.. #punching nelson (twice) + shooting hortense between the eyes + shooting tilda in the knee.. #girl you're not exactly a great role model at having control over your violent tendencies either 💅 #but there's something so raw abt her and max just.. knowing those feelings intimately.. and not wanting it for the other.. #defending each other.. seeing the good in each other.. /knowing/ the good in each other.. #understanding how messy and complicated they are and then understanding why and just ough bringing out the best in each other #reaching a point where they can breathe and heal and not be in such a spiraling pain anymore they can just be loved and be themselves #unapologetically. caged no longer. being harmed no longer. by others or by themselves. and taking it out on others no longer #anyway #what I'm saying is.. #the call is coming from inside the house.. #yes he had an entire revenge scheme and lied abt his intentions.. but like.. he's also holding a mirror up to her face #SORRY I just love thinking abt how complicated cap faith is lmao she's a very broken soul who is trying her best in an unfortunate situatio #the way she handles her own traumas and griefs just isn't pretty and that's a whole other can of worms she's constantly faced with #rambling #faith and max

[ms0milk]

my pussy can only be so wet, this is getting ridiculous

#like- what am i even supposed to do anymore? #breathe without medical intervention? be fk fr #LOOK at her #maki #MAAAKIII #how is my heart not melting through my ribs like molten glass #jjk spoilers #jjkspoilers

[von-karmas-a-bitch]

playing tgaac as a british person is really a trip bc i got to the bit where susato and ryuunosuke are musing about the bricked up windows in london and what possible purpose there could be for bricking up the windows when someone clearly still lives there. they don't know about the window tax......

#can't even have windows in this god-forsaken country smh #they really will tax based on anything other than actual income #it's not a thing anymore as far as im aware but still #instead of taxing based on how much their income might be based on how big the house might be based on the number of windows #how about you idk maybe... tax..... the rich........ instead of taking windows away from poor people #don't even get me started on council tax that's still a thing #why don't you tax the guy who actually owns the property instead of assuming im well off bc i live in a nice area #tax the landlord he's already bleeding me dry #waiting with bated breath for my sister's boyfriend to move in before we're officially put on the contract bc otherwise we straight up #will not be able to afford the council tax #why. why am i taxed based on an assumption of what my income may be based on my location #you know my actual income is peanuts what the fuck #hate this hell country. war and hell on planet earth #tgaac #sophia's soliloquies

[cptnbatel]

no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger — something better, pushing right back. — albert camus

#— file ✧ self promo. #star trek rp #all starfleet personnel #is that even a rp tag we use anymore or am I just still living in 2020 (probably) #we're on round 2 of breathing life into female characters snw insists on using as nothing more than a plot device

[listening505]

in so sick rn i wish he could take care of me

#is this flu #or cold #i cant even breath anymore #and i lost my voice bc i’ve been coughing for 4 or 5 days #am i dying #i just know he makes soup with his bone broth or something that will make me so much better #james hetfield #metallica #acillatem #jaymz <3 #80s rock

[unleashthelion]

Seriously people learn to post your fics under a read more or something. When I go to Ewan’s tag I want to see posts about him and not scroll past billion of fics that aren’t under a read more. Also people thirsting on him from his disturbing movie where he plays a literal r*pist by posting gifs of his scenes DONT DO IT???

#ewan mitchell #that movie was so disturbing why are y’all posting gifs and thirsting over him in that movie #its fucking triggering for people and creepy #also can’t even go to his tag anymore without seeing lots of aemond fics #like if i want to read aemond fics or other characters he plays i go to that tag instead #why post it in ewan’s tag when he’s the actor #a real life breathing person #i am so annoyed by this #i just had to rant about it #idc

[maggot-baggage]

#THANK GOD I GOT THIS COMMISSION WHEN I DID BC MY LIGHTS GO OFF TOMORROW NIGHT #my dono post lost traction so this is keepin my lights on til i habe to leave #and might even help cover the rest of my car costs since ion have to worry bout the wifi anymore #but now im gonna be stressing about makin this look as good as possible bc this person asked for a fullbody render(<-hasnt done one in #forever) #but fuck am i relieved i can breath a bit easier til the 28th #mag.txt

[nobodybetterlookatme]

Would love to know why my body has suddenly decided that it's okay to give up on trying to function when it's actually super not okay

#not snz #but i am coughing like hell so there's that #I'm not even sick or anything #my respiratory system is just being a bitch #tell me why I've been doing intense cardio for basically my whole life #never had a problem with any of it before #swam at the junior olympic level #was on the track and cross country teams all of high school #and now all of a sudden my throat wants to try to close whenever i run for more than twenty minutes #lung wise i was getting in enough oxygen but Something Was Happening #and it's been like twenty hours at this point and I'm still feeling it in my throat #fucking dying #i can breathe fine now like it's not bad anymore #but i can still fucking feel it #and if i breathe too deeply in makes me cough like hello wtf #my chest gets a little tight sometimes after i run but this is something else #and it's literally only when i run i can do any other type of cardio or exercise and it's fine #and it's not even every single time i run #fucking sporadic #hate it here