#like. i am fascinated with characters who die and come back different and it JUST hit me that there was so much potential for hazel there

[thaliagrayce]

y'know what we don't talk about enough? Hazel died. We talk about how she grew up in the 30's and 40's and we talk about how out of place she feels in the modern world, but! She died! She was dead! She has spent more time dead than alive, and not by a close margin!

How does that effect a person??? We got some of it in the flashbacks, but once those caught up with her present timeline and she shared them, they just kind of... disappeared. And she was a regular girl with some weird past experiences. That's one way of doing it, sure!

I think it would have been a lot cooler if she was just a touch creepier. If she felt a little bit Wrong. Yeah, in general she's more approachable than her brother, she's more sociable and less closed off, but. If you actually spend any time with her, it can be difficult to tell which child of the underworld is actually more unsettling.

Hazel is bright of personality and has a dazzling smile, but sometimes she'll just... shut down. She'll go completely blank for like half an hour and nobody knows what to do with it. Sometimes she forgets she's alive. Sometimes she'll spout the grimmest shit you've ever heard like it's nothing, she won't even notice it's weird until the room goes quiet. She spent decades in Asphodel, which is designed to make people forget about themselves and wander around for eternity, only she didn't have the luxury of forgetting! Wild! After she comes back to life, sometimes she forgets that she's allowed to Do Stuff now. She can spend so long sitting and staring at nothing. Sometimes she'll start crying on cloudless days because it hits her again that she can actually feel the warmth of the sun on her skin and she can hear birdsong. Every little mundane experience is a blessing and she will make you remember that in the most foreboding way possible.

#hazel levesque #hoo #mj talks #like. i am fascinated with characters who die and come back different and it JUST hit me that there was so much potential for hazel there #the idea of how death lingers was not explored At All in heroes of olympus #of course there's the obvious part in that there were what. 3 named character deaths total? 4 if you count leo #which i very much don't because it didn't stick! there were no consequences to this gigantic war! #the first series did well with that because we had plenty of named characters who died #even though some of them were introduced only to die like six chapters later. we still knew them on some level #and more importantly percy knew them. he felt their loss in a way that made consequences seem real #heroes of olympus didn't have any of that. hazel could have been a great way to talk about it a little more! #also i just love characters who have obviously gone through death. that has to change a person! tell me how it changed you! #anyway. i think i'll make hazel creepier from now on in my writing #she deserves it <3 #nico is creepy in an obvious way. he's got power over death and that clings to him like a second skin. he can't hide it #and he's learned that he doesn't have to. there is power in being othered #hazel seems lovely when you first meet her! none of the death power all of the glitter and gold and riches #and then she'll look you dead in the eye and say 'you really don't know how lucky you are to be able to breathe until you can't anymore' #and move on like it's nothing! what! #underworld siblings

[aingeal98]

Something I enjoy a lot about Cass is that with a lot of heroes that don't kill it can easily veer into self righteousness. It happens with Bruce a fair amount and while it can make for a compelling character beat if done well, if done poorly it just kind of makes the reader annoyed lmao. Like why am I supposed to root for this guy when he's saying "If you shoot the man who killed your parents your soul will be forever ruined!" and acting like there's no difference between types of kill?

And the thing about Cass is that while her no kill rule is based on the experience of watching someone die and the horror she felt, and while she does project it into pretty much everyone she meets... It never comes across as unlikeably self righteous to me. Like for Cass every kill is a tragedy and while her no death rule is a moral statement it's also given more importance as an rule that gives us psychological insight into what governs and drives her. Even when she's wrong, even when the villain is so sympathetic and justified that there's no reason to root for her, the narrative always feels very self aware about it. Like when she let that father get arrested despite him just wanting his daughter back. The writer (Puckett of course) wasn't interested in convincing the reader that Cass's judgement was the morally correct choice. He was interested in what it said about her that it was the choice she chose.

And similarly when she approaches people to try and stop them from killing she always lacks the morally righteous air a lot of others carry. She's desperate and earnest and determined to get them to change but it's not because she thinks she's in any way better than them and has the right to pass judgement because of it. It's someone who genuinely believes that she's irredeemable manically trying to save everyone else because if these killers can do the right thing and turn over a new leaf then maybe... Just maybe... there's hope for her?

It's so compelling to me. The desperation and clear projection that happens when she goes out determined to enforce and/or promote her code to as many people possible. Every time she says someone can change she's speaking from experience. Because she views herself as irredeemable and beneath everyone but she's still out here trying to be good so maybe if others make the same choice it's proof that she's not doomed. That none of them are. She doesn't want the hitman to redeem himself by becoming a hero and helping his former victims. She just wants him to walk away, to start a peaceful and quiet new life. And when he fails to do that and they meet again she still won't give up on him. When she stands in front of the victims family she won't declare she knows better. She'll hopefully and uncertainty ask "But maybe... He can change?"

Like there's so much heart behind everything she does and every action she takes. Every time the topic of killing people comes up she's so earnest and clearly projecting her own issues and seeing herself in every murderer and it's so fun. It's so fascinating. I miss Batgirl 2000.

#dc #cassandra cain #dc rambles #There's also the way the narrative sets up characters that challenge her #And then actually let them challenge her with no clear winner #Or even let's cass fail despite her conviction #She loses but it doesn't matter she's not going to change her mind. She'll feel like shit and then keep going

[tumblingxelian]

Thoughts on Stephanie Brown, Crime & Community

A lot of the posts I’ve been reading lately about Bruce’s brutality towards low level criminals and whether Jason betraying his own community or not, the double standards and meta analysis has all been very interesting. 

And it has also left me musing on Stephanie Brown’s character. 

Specifically how she operates in a really fascinating position that was likely not intended by the writers but one can reach anyway. 

So a quick primer: 

Stephanie Brown came up in a low income (at best) family in Gotham. Her father was consistently in and out of prison only briefly holding down a steady job and when he was home he was violent towards both Stephanie and her mother.

Crystal was neglectful and a substance abusing addict until Stephanie was about 15 and even then their relationship was quite messy with Stephanie still forced into a parental role. 

(She also escaped sexual assault as a child and was clearly traumatized by the event and given her ‘boyfriend’ who got her pregnant looed significantly older than her one could argue she was a victim of grooming.)

Her first team up with Batgirl (long before she receives any training) Shows she has an intimate and immediate understanding of criminal operations that can only come from either self study or experience. One of her earlier team ups with Robin & the then Green Arrow (Investigating gun runners selling to kids) had her note she felt her community was neglected by the heroes. Her first team up with Batgirl also had them basically steal money that would have gone to evidence to donate it to charity and she also reveal hinted at different times a dislike or lack of faith in the police. 

Now, not everything was hunky dory, as there were some writers who basically decided her motive was “Impress Robin”. Fortunately this only cropped up every now and again and she’d often try and seek out team ups and mentors elsewhere. And given it doesn’t line up well with her initial character I am content to view it as an artifact of the writer. 

But I digress, how does this go into her relationship with her community and criminals in general? 

Well, suffice to say her relationship with them is bad. 

Her first time out as Spoiler she tries to murder her father and has to be talked down by Batman. She later reveals to Crystal she was doing this to protect her because she was tired of seeing Arthur come back and ruin their lives over and over again. She also used visitation rights when he was in prison to beat the hell out of him because he orchestrated her kidnapping and near missed murder for money, while the guards just let it happen. 

In one of her first team ups with Robin they fight criminals in a snow covered building and his cutting of support beams leads them all to be buries. Robin insists on finding him and saving him, while Stephanie suggests leaving him to die, dismissing his motives along the lines of, “I was poor, daddy never loved me, ETC.” She only agreed trying to save him was a good idea when they accidently found a homeless woman and her child also buried. 

later on she also didn’t want to save a villain who managed to kidnap both herself and Robin. We also see her shrug off the prospect of accidentally killing a serial killer she was in combat with. She also has a violent exchange with Penguin after he started using children as gun runners which hinted at wanting to wipe people like him off the map. When he was dismissive of even facing charges because “I've got people for that” she legit scared and injured him and Batgirl needed to stop her from going further. 

(She also shrugged off Dick killing Joker while everyone else was freaking out but like, come on. Joker fills literal graveyards in universe and had been terrorizing the world minutes before, he’s not a ‘normal criminals’ by any stretch.)

Overall, her relationship to criminals in general was varying degree of contemptuous and she was quite comfortable with the prospect of doling out lethal punishment to criminals, though she never got the on screen opportunity. I think her general attitude is best summed up as “yes trauma sucks but its no excuse to take it out on your community” while holding those who profit off those circumstances in utter contempt. IE, she disdains petty criminals for victimizing their fellows and she hates the kingpins who run everything. 

(Though I doubt this was intended by the writers.) 

But I digress, I’m not expert enough to say whether this is a realistic or positive response to her circumstances, but I do find it an interesting one. I also think its a lot more nuanced than Batman’s brutality even if one could argue its problematic. Though that also broached the “Are we discussing in universe or out of universe” and so on. Really not sure where I was going with this. I maybe just wanted the chance to discuss Stephanie cos I think she’s really interesting. 

So uh, yeah. 

#Batman #Batfam #DC #detective comics #DC Comics #The Spoiler #Stephanie Brown

[wutheringmights]

I finished rereading The Song of the Lioness quartet by Tamora Pierce a couple of days back. I already talked about the first book in a post that garnered more attention than it deserved. I guess we were all happily reminiscing about the menstruation scenes together, or Tortall fans are so starved for content they (we) will reblog anything.(Understandable. I too am starved for a thriving Tortall fandom.)

I'm too lazy to make separate posts about each book, so we're just going to do a mega post covering the second, third, and fourth book.

Unlike last time, I will be giving a little criticism to this series. I still love it endlessly, but there were a few things about the prose I thought was interesting that I want to talk about a bit.

So, without further ado~

In the Hand of the Goddess

I think this one is my favorite one, despite how rushed the plot it. It contains all of my favorite plot points, like awkward romances with George and Jon, attending knight lessons, and a little summer war. Fun stuff.

But it definitely feels rushed. I really wish someone told Pierce to make this a 12 book series, expanding on Alanna's years at the castle. It would have gone so far to better develop the romances and the friendships in these books.

I am fascinated by what Pierce chose to skim over. Characters would die or kiss for the first time off screen, with the prose resuming with Alanna reacting to it. It demonstrates an understanding of character work that I personally adore and try to emulate in my own writing-- the real bones of a story being in how characters respond to fantastic events as opposed to the fantastic events themselves.

Also, the whole veil spell Roger cast in objectively stupid, and I mean that in the most affectionate way possible. You're telling me that Roger used magic to make Alanna lose interest in doing anything about the obviously evil things he was doing? That's fucking hilarious. You know an editor came back to Pierce and asked her to come up with a reason why Alanna wasn't just going to spring into action at the first sign of Roger trying to kill her, only for Pierce to come up with this. It's so silly. I love it.

Woman Who Rides Like A Man

Did this book age poorly? Yes, but not as badly as I remembered. That's not a stirring defense, and it's really not meant to be.

The Bahzir are a mess of Orientalism, and Pierce definitely deserves criticism for not only the way she wrote them but for the ways in which she frames their cultural practices as something that needs to be fixed. Having Alanna want to force them to change their culture to suit her beliefs is not a great look for both the character and the writer. And that's not even getting into the whole assimilation plotline.

But I did enjoy Pierce's attempts to expand on the definition of womanhood, especially as a part of Alanna learning to embrace femininity. There is this running thread in these last two books of Alanna learning about all the different ways to be a woman and choosing for herself what her gender means to her. It's not done particularly well, and anyone looking for a revolutionary examination of gender roles and identity is going to be sorely disappointed. But there's an attempt here that I can't help but appreciate.

This book is also where Pierce starts to slow the plot down, which lends it to having the most reasonable pacing out of the bunch. That being said, it's also the book where the lack of development for a bunch of the side characters start to hurt. I really wish Gary or Raoul joined Alanna in the desert. Raoul gets his moment in the sun with the Protector of the Small books, but Gary remains largely forgettable. In fact, I spent this entire read-through convinced this man dies at the end of the last book, if only because I can't remember where he appears in any of the other books.

Lioness Rampant

This book somehow has the improved pacing of the third book while still feeling rushed. The quest for the Dominion Jewel really should have been it's own book, if only to give Thayet and Buri more room for development. Thayet in particular really needs her moment to shine, especially when she continues to be an important character in the other series.

But do you know who did get a lot of screen time? Liam.

Remembered shit about this guy before going into this book. I could only vaguely recalled disliking him as a kid, but not as much as I venomously hated Jon. (Speaking of which-- I love the way this man is realistically shitty. Him getting dumped by Alanna is always my favorite scene.) But Liam? Fuck that guy. Holy shit. I give full applause to Pierce for portraying the important milestones every girl goes through growing up, which includes having a situationship that is so shitty that it becomes essential character development.

Roger's return feels very... cheesy? I think Alex should have stepped up to be the final villain on the story. Unlike Roger, Alex was Alanna's friend. They have history. The betrayal would have imbued that final fight with so many more emotions than it ultimately had. I also would have liked Alanna to have at least meaningfully talked to Alex sometime before the climax.

Honestly, it's impressive how reactive Alanna is as a character in the last half of the book. She doesn't seek out how to stop Roger's plan, or fix Thom, or anything. Other characters make plans and she just... waits for something to go wrong.

That being said, by virtue of Alanna's relationships with George, Liam, and Jon all happening sometime in this plot, this book becomes a good place to look to get the full berth of how Pierce handles romances. Which, I love her approach. The romances are never over the top or, for lack of a better word, too romantic. It's very down to earth, with characters dating, marrying, or breaking up for realistic reasons.

Jon and Alanna were friends who broke up because they had different life plans. Liam and Alanna broke up for having fundamentally different values. As much as I bitch about how shitty Jon and Liam are, they're not cartoonishly evil. They're just a little shitty the way most of your exes will be. Jon and Liam are men could find love with someone else. They just aren't suited for Alanna.

Meanwhile, the most romantic things George does are wait for her and be supportive. He doesn't fight or get territorial. He makes his feelings clear, then waits for Alanna's cues. Alanna definitely loves him, but she ends up with him in the end because their lifestyles and core beliefs meld together. There's no grand romantic gesture or whirlwind affairs. They are just a good pair.

I have read stories with far heavier focuses on romance, and none of those couples feel as perfect as Alanna and George. Those stories prioritize all the gooey moments over showing why the main couple should get together. For how little romantic interactions they have, you believe these two could have a successful marriage. Perfect stuff.

---

Over all, I really enjoyed rereading these books. For all my griping, I still love the story. I love Alanna. She's a character who is fundamental to my soul. No matter where I am in life, I will always want to open these books and find her again, to walk back into Tortall and join her on her quest to be a lady knight.

My copies of the series come with forewards from a previous edition. In one of them, Pierce wrote that this series started off as an adult fantasy story that was much darker and edgier. I need to know what that story looks like, what happened in it. Pierce can claim as she wants that she hardly remembers what it looks like, but I refuse to believe that. Release the unedited first draft, Pierce. I am begging you.

#it probably has on screen gay sex for thom and roger #anyway that's the alanna series. the library book i ordered is still not here yet so now I'm off to find another short-ish book to read #this book better come in before june or else i will lose it. i am putting off reading the illiad for this #me rambling #bookish #books and reading #books #bookblr #tortall #song of the lioness #tamora pierce #me reading

[sidsinning]

Nobody:

My brain at 3 am:

Alucard's relationships with Seras and Integra in both animated versions of the series tells you a lot about his character and the differences between each version of him.

When you really think about it, Alucard in Hellsing (2001) actually gave Seras a clear choice by telling her what he would do to kill the evil vampire and his offer, waiting for her answer before going through with the gunshot. Throughout the whole fight Seras was firmly within the grasp of the evil vampire so there was little for Alucard to do to save her besides this offer based off the limits to his powers he had in this version of the series. It was most likely a rare sense of compassion that drove Alucard to give this small human a chance to live and be guided by his presence. This is shown throughout the show as he maturely and calmly walks her through the process and looks over her choices on her journey. He silently watches over the choices she makes by drinking blood or not, rejecting his blood, and lets her freely discover/adapt to her new life.

Ultimate however paints a different picture. The Alucard we know in Ultimate is much more selfish, emotionally immature, and heavily basks in his bloodlust and insanity, even moreso than Alucard 2001. Seras was out of the grasp of the evil vampire when Alucard appeared as a distraction in this scene. If he was really concerned with saving her he would have immediately dispatched the evil vampire and let her go on her way. I deduce he already planned, at least subconciously, to have Seras make the impossible choice to die or become a vampire like him. He saw how Seras fought back when faced with the evil vampire's threats to assault and enslave her and decided then she was worthy of being a proper vampire by his side. Like he says, it was a contemplative moment of whimsy and slight compassion, but moreso that selfish side of Ultimate Alucard coming through in wanting a companion of sorts after years of solitude.

This is why unlike 2001, he is a lot more frustrated and exasperated with her choice to not drink blood or free herself of his power over her. He wanted to have someone equal by his side, an equal ally to walk the night with, but ended up with a pseudo daughter-student-servant of sorts who was strangely HAPPY remaining by his side under him. He's frustrated but also fascinated at her stubbornly trying to cling to her humanity despite having the means to become all powerful like him. Unlike 2001, he slowly, gradually becomes the parental support Seras really needed instead of the master to slave relationship they have on paper. He is eventually willing to teach her on her terms while nudging her not to just be powerful for his own desire, but to step up to what she is now that she's no longer human. It is the best path he sees for her growth as a person.

It's why he gives her that endearing head pat after she wipes out the army invading the manor. Despite still not drinking his blood, he sees her at her full potential and contentment with her place under him and is happy for her, fully seeing her as her own person with her own goals in life that differ from his own. Not drinking human blood legitimately hurt her which was unacceptable and unsustainable, while not drinking his blood in particular was ok in the end, something he comes to terms with, because being connected to him is what she wants.

His relationship with Integra in 2001 is very strictly master to servant with Alucard holding a deep sense of undying loyalty and respect for the mostly stoic and pragmatic Integra. Rarely will Integra show affection to Alucard on a human level, at least obviously. She is more cold and decisive, telling Alucard he doesn't make decisions after Alucard tells her he wants Seras to be transferred into their organization. Despite this, Alucard is still devoted and caring towards her, telling Seras how strong Integra is for potentially sacrificing her life to not become a vampire. The bond they have is still powerful and deep, as her meeting with Alucard largely remained the same in both versions. She went from a brave but not completely fearless little girl with the guts to declare herself his master after witnessing his massacre of her uncle's guards, to the fearless and capable leader he now serves happily.

In Ultimate however, their relationship is much warmer as it shows her accommodating him with luxuries like a private jet and his own hotel room, smirking and bantering with him back and forth, and not shutting him down when concerning Seras, instead asking him about his choice. She is much more curious to understand him despite still seeing him as her servant and weapon to her organization. This warmth and compassion is also extended to Seras who she offers her own blood to. Alucard is also completely devoted and loyal to Integra, but the professional line between them is a bit more blurred. He holds a strange desire to see Integra bask in the same bloodlust he feels, to lose herself to the insanity of battle and bloodshed- having the AUDACITY to tell her he got aroused by her orders, then asking her, his master, whether or not she got turned on by his actions at her command. It shows a deeper desire for her that is not clearly defined as romantic, but definitely charged in a way 2001 was not. This Alucard's insanity and lust for battle consumes him much more than 2001 Alucard. He is always trigger happy to the point of making it everyone else's problem. It's his emotional immaturity coming through because- who the fuck asks something like that to anybody??? 2001 Alucard strictly respects Integra on an intellectual level while Ultimate Alucard,,,holds something that goes deeper into his carnal desires. Selfish little asshole that throws a tantrum when his battles don't end the way he likes, accidentally taking out his emotions on his surrogate daughter, feeling regret and remorse 2001 Alucard has not because of his patience and emotional maturity in regards to those important to him.

By the end of Ultimate, Alucard the selfish, emotionally immature, crazy man child that he is, displays his firm possessiveness over both Seras and Integra to Walter to taunt, belittle, and degrade him for the hell of it. To feel petty superiority.

-then I wake up and think about all of this all over again 🥴🥴🥴

#seriously its a PROBLEM i listen to the OP on repeat everyday 🥴✋️✋️✋️ #im also listening to the songs from the damn abridged series 24/7 😭😭😭 #ready to die and party party party #hellsing #alucard #integra fairbrook wingates hellsing #seras victoria #sidrabbles

[damnilovefaerghus]

The Tragedy of Felix and Rodrigue

tl;dr: The tragedy is that Felix and Rodrigue are Fodlan's equivalent of "angry teenage atheist + nice religious dad", and also the Exact Same Person, because they both:

Devote themselves to some life goal following the trauma of losing someone close to them

Push away other people they care about with their attempts to make sense of loss

Fail in some way to show affection or communicate their true feelings

Care specifically about Dimitri like a lot

See: Felix coping with Glenn's death by copying his personality, devoting himself to crusading against anyone else finding meaning in death, and pushing away family and friends, or Rodrigue coping with losing his son and best friend by looking for meaning in Glenn's actions and Lambert's legacy, devoting himself to supporting Dimitri, and pushing away his remaining son in the process.

Felix and Rodrigue even approach life very similarly; both of them are tied up in the past and trying to avoid grief aagain. Felix's edginess is an effort to stop others from caring about his own death as well as to push other people away from their deaths, while Rodrigue is more than willing to die himself if it would protect those he cares for. It's even present in both of their endings; Rodrigue (at least in original 3 Houses) seemingly dies in every route to keep his promise to his king's memory, while Felix will inevitably throw his life away in meaningless killing if he loses Dimitri.

So the most tragic thing about their family relationship is that they're not actually arguing over what they think they're arguing over. Both Felix and Rodrigue are extremely loyal and devoted people who've made it their goals in life to protect others. The problem is that they're doing it in ways that feel like direct attacks on each other (and that Felix has dedicated himself to being an edgy asshole for the entirety of the game). If Felix had to admit that Rodrigue was not the embodiment of Faerghus's chivalry, just a man who said something stupid while grieving his son, Felix would lose the meaning he finds in protecting other people from dying like Glenn. And similarly, Rodrigue can't accept Felix's point about it being foolish to throw one's life away for a belief, because that would be tantamount to admitting that Glenn and Lambert died for no reason.

So what's the difference between Houses and Hopes (where they actually do manage to talk)? I'm just speculating, but in the original 3 Houses, Felix either ends up in a separate House, turns against his family, or in Azure Moon spends five years searching for Dimitri while Rodrigue is holding the last bastion of Faerghus's defense against Cornelia and the Empire. The focus is on the war, not their family relationship, and they've both moved too far to talk through everything in the limited time they have (though Rodrigue does try, according to a Yuri dialogue). In contrast, Azure Gleam puts the Tragedy of Duscur front and center, dragging Felix and Rodrigue's conflict back out and forcing them to reckon with it. It also helps that after becoming Duke, Felix has to start to consider things with more responsibility in mind, while Rodrigue upon giving up his title seems to have mellowed out a little. It doesn't change either of them as characters, but it starts to bridge the gap between their outlooks on life, and makes their mutual apology much more possible.

Anyway, the conclusion is that Fraldarifam is fascinating, and I am rotating them both on a little ballet dancer table where they (every so often) come together in the center to agree on something before spinning off again

#rodrigue achille fraldarius #felix hugo fraldarius #fire emblem three houses #fe3h

[ziskandra]

1, 8, and 10 for the Violence Meme :3

1. The character everyone gets wrong

The way that ‘Loghain Mac Tir’ immediately comes to mind probably says a lot about the way he’s portrayed in fandom, huh… While I obviously don’t expect anyone to see my blorbos 100% the same as me, sometimes I’ll see takes that are so diametrically opposed mine that I’m just like: huh.

That being said, Loghain is a very complex and layered character, and all the different possible ways to read his motivations only leads credence to that fact.

Anyway, here are my own preferences/biases when it comes to Loghain:

1) Maric is Loghain's everything, and not only that, but the Maric that lives in Loghain’s head is even larger than the man himself was in real life. Personally, I like how this explains the discrepancy between the way Loghain describes Maric (as though he farts rainbows) and the way Maric is described in the tie-in novels (rather punchable).

Sure, they might've gone through a lot of shit together, but Loghain is completely abnormal about Maric and I love that for them.

2) I think Cailan’s death at Ostagar wasn't planned, per se, but rather that Loghain was willing to take that loss if necessary.

And look, Loghain did try to warn Cailan that fighting on the front lines would be foolhardy, but Cailan refused to listen and well… what can I say other than Loghain knows how to pick his battles? 😌

3) Loghain is not very politically savvy: I like to think Anora got her more astute people skills from her mother.

That being said, I think people sometimes forget how at the start of Origins, Loghain is a man deeply in mourning: in the preceding years he’s lost his best friend and his wife.

I feel this is also part of why he doesn’t realise he can rely on Anora: fully accepting that she’s a capable adult and no longer a little girl with pigtails as skinned knees would be to accept that there is no going back, he can never go back: the happiest, most purposeful part of his life is behind him and who is he, other than a father with a disobedient daughter, and the general of a nation that is starting to rise up against him?

Loghain basically suffers from like, a catastrophic loss of identity during the course of the game and is pretty much ready to die by The Landsmeet. If anything he’s glad to have found such a worthy opponent in the Warden: it means Ferelden’s fate is in good hands.

4) Leading to my last point: a combination of all the factors above means Loghain is very open to manipulation (by Howe, by Anora, by the Warden should they so choose).

That being said, I don’t think that absolves him of his complicity in his crimes, and especially not the slavery in the alienage. He very much knew the elves were being sold, but had also accepted that the alienage was lost to the darkspawn. I can certainly see someone with Loghain’s background deciding that giving the elves at least some chance of survival as well while also making more money for the war effort as the practical choice. While it’s not the moral choice, it is a pragmatic one and Loghain is a pragmatist.

Anyway my actual point is that while some Loghain fans might try and minimise his involvement in the alienage, I find it far more fascinating to explore through the lens of who he is a person. After all, I am not looking at fiction to inform my morals wholesale, but rather to explore other perspectives, and I am especially drawn to how people can justify atrocities to themselves, SO! Here I am, sharing my Loghain thoughts on tumblr dot com 😌

[choose violence ask meme]

#i've answered the other two for dragon age in the past but have different mass effect answers for them so will write them up separately #god knows this post is long enough already! #loghain mac tir #bc i've been waiting for a moment to dump my loghain thoughts for a while #asha answers #breadedsinner #thank you for the ask!! <3

[belovedblabber]

What I can’t get over is how much John loved his friends. 

It’s so clear in the way he talks about them as he tells Alecto/Harrow about his story of what happened. What keeps hitting me hard is that he seems so taken aback by how much they loved him. By the fact that they stayed with him, the fact that none of them left him. Even as he’s telling this story back he seems so awed by the fact that they stayed with him through it all. 

He calls them his loved ones and yeah, they were. And that love is still there, in whatever way that love can exist after a myriad of being God. It’s fucked up and warped and twisted just by the nature of who he is and who he’s become and what he’s done, but it’s still there, wrapped up in the whole mess of him and warped, probably beyond repair.

The Locked Tomb is so heavily tied up in love. In different kinds of love. There are so many different manifestations of love in these books, and so many different ways we the readers are shown love and shown what it does to people and how different people express it and live with it.

And not to sound like someone who is all ‘y’all just don’t GET my fave’ but I think something that isn’t talked about enough is the way that love is what drove John to what he became and what he did. Obviously I’m not saying there weren’t other factors at work, he’s a tasty guy full of a million character traits that I want to study like a bug, but I think that love is so key to understanding his character. Love is what drove him and love is what ultimately undid him and undid the world. I love this passage so much:

The whole thing is just so good, and then the ending of “For John had loved the world” sucker punches me all the way to Wednesday and back. He loved the world. He loved the world to the point of destruction. All of his hopelessness and rage and despair that ultimately drove him towards the moment he became God came about because of that love. I think that love as a destructive force is such a tasty thing to think about. It’s so good. Love as something that can drive someone to terrible things, love as something that can break you because it’s just so much. He loved the world so much. And again though, I want to reiterate that he loved his friends and that that also played such a key role in things. It’s no coincidence that the moment he finally snapped came about as he watched his friends die around him. I’m not saying that it was just ‘oh he got sad and had a whoopsie’ because no that’s boring and also wrong. I am not uwu-ing this man, he’s an absolutely terrifying character and I am fascinated by him and what he does and how he justifies it to himself and all the awful shit he pulls. There was so much at play, so much that had been pushing him to the edge etc. so many delicious Greek tragedy level ingredients being thrown into the John Gaius descent into darkness pot. 

But I still think it’s so key that what finally brought all of this to a head, with his anger and despair driving him to the point of threatening nuclear war as the trillionaires left the world to die and the mobs knocking down his gates, was his friends. It all came together in such a tragic way and god, the whole John 1:20 interlude chapter is so damn good, the way it escalates, the way all of this madness and panic and absolute frantic terror and loss of control all comes together (I teared up reading it, and said “damn Tamsyn” out loud, for the record). The way John recounts how his love ones died in this sort of blank, blurry way. The very clear fact that his mind is barely grasping it as he tries to remember how to tell the story, that it was all so chaotic, that he watched them die, the way he can’t keep it all straight. His account of it is very disjointed and almost dreamlike, and it’s absolutely heartbreaking. As is the fact that he could feel each person die (“like popping bubble wrap”) and felt it as his friends died around him (and actually saw some of them shot right in front of him and god the way he recounts those ones has such a specifically heart breaking tone to it idk how Ms. Muir gets that across so well). It HURTS. And honestly, I think his friends were his humanity by the end. Or they were what was keeping him tethered to it. Whichever way you prefer to see it. They were what could have held him there, if it hadn’t all gone to shit, if it had gone a different way, if they’d lived and if they’d managed to rein him in and walk him down from his despair. But they died, and he loved them, and the world was screaming, and he loved the world. And he stopped the heart of his last living friend to set off a nuke.

And then as he put it, he let go. 

It’s so good, I am writing this at past 5am in the morning so this is not me at my most coherent as I try to get these thoughts to sound good in not my head but STILL

Anyway it’s all about love and John’s story is so heavily laden with the idea of love as a destructive force and I am LOSING my MIND

Also he made flowers grow for Nigella and Cassiopeia’s wedding but they were weird and some had teeth but Nigella and Cassiopeia thought it was hilarious and John was Cassiopeia’s best man and he cried through the entire service and he ate food then even though he couldn’t remember the last time he’d eaten food and look, look this is what I’m talking about when I say his friends were his humanity/were what was keeping him tethered to his humanity, I am crying in the club

#nona the ninth #nona the ninth spoilers #the locked tomb #john gaius #ntn #ntn spoilers #tlt #the locked tomb series #it's about LOVE #and yes I am aware he’s telling the story as an unreliable narrator don’t worry ajsjdjdjd

[ereborne]

Hello, happy holidays! For the End of the year ask meme if you'll like to answer any of the following: 8 (game of the year), 25 (a character you created), 14 (fav book), or 18 (a memorable meal)

Happy holidays! I hope they've treated you well <3

8: I don't play many games myself (only Stardew Valley, Minecraft, and silly seek-and-find puzzle games) and my laptop was too tuckered for games for most of the year, but even if I'd been farming nonstop I think the game of the year would still be Final Fantasy VII Remake. Pretty sure it'll be the game of every year until it's all out, and then maybe a couple years more for good measure. I am having such an incredible time following the game as it comes out and @kaylithographica plays through it, and I can't wait to see how Square Enix keeps going with the meta and story changes.

25: Some of the more complex edits I've been trying to work on this week actually revolve around a particular OC, so we'll talk about her. Her name is Mercy, and she was not supposed to be important (folks who have lived with me may be familiar with this refrain). She was supposed to be a filler character! She's an archetype! Her name is Mercy and she has none! Grr rar tragic backstory vengeance quest knife collection! But nooo now she's got layers. She's got depth. We're emotionally invested in her character arc. Damn it. Anyway she befriends her local main characters to use them as pawns in her revenge plot, spends a lot of time with them waiting for them to vouch for her to her target, gives up her first chance at revenge because she has to go save them instead (in a scene so terribly close to the classic 'stand at crossroad, look longingly at selfish goal down the left, turn back fully on goal to run to friends down the right path' that I may rewrite it to avoid cliche shame), and then eventually gives up her scheming entirely because it would be too much of a betrayal of her very best friends the main characters. She was supposed to die in the first rescue, and then the whole story locked up and I had to go back through trying to find the writer's block instigation point, and I realized I've made too optimistic a world to kill her off without friends or redemption. She's (big sigh) thematically significant now. At least she's also very cool.

14: I'm going with my favorite book that came out this year, to help narrow things down: "The Innocent Sleep", by Seanan McGuire. Seanan McGuire is one of my favorite authors and this is my favorite of her ongoing serieses, and usually we get one a year (usually just in time to be my birthday present to myself! a joyous coincidence) but this year we got two. "Sleep No More" and "The Innocent Sleep", paired stories, one from Toby's point of view and one from Tybalt's. The current state of their world means that these two POVs of the same happenings are wildly different, and it's fascinating (a little heart-wrenching sometimes) to see. Also, Tybalt and his friends dimension-door into Costco in the dead of night and steal all their catfood. It's amazing.

18: The vegeble man had a special on collard greens one time, and I bought a 'bundle' thinking it was your standard grocery-store greens bundle, a generous handful at most. It was more like an armful. Apparently the special was because they'd been sold a literal truckload of greens (perfectly good but disqualified as 'organic' by some neighbor shenanigans) and needed to offload them quickly because the fridge wasn't ready for such a bumper crop. I cooked them in batches with andouille sausage and bacon and just a touch of this amazing miso ghost-pepper hot sauce Duncan has, and we ate them for our next four meals (with grits, with cornbread and grilled tomatoes, with fried eggs and beer bread, and then the last of them mixed into red beans and rice). I really miss not just Southern food but access to Southern ingredients (the 'andouille' sausage I get here is pitiful, and bacon is no substitute for a proper salt-ham, and neither is beer bread always a good alternative to a buttermilk biscuit or quickbread) and it was so nice to have a proper mess of greens again.

#asks #sunkentowers #I would pay such absurd prices for buttermilk if only I could /find/ some up here. milk-and-lemon-juice is not the same. #apparently 'mess' as a quantity of food items is also a particular American Southernism #a holdover from the civil war it seems like. when they got a teeny little stipend rather than proper rations #'mess-mates' would pool their food money and buy enough of whatever for the whole group to eat #so a 'mess' of food is roughly enough for four-to-six men. a mess of greens fills a big pot a mess of bacon is a six-inch-thick slab etc #I can tone down my accent when I talk so the folks in the office won't judge me but sometimes the word choice outs me anyway

[actual-bill-potts]

For the Director's Cut game! I'd love to hear your commentary about the latest chapter of And All His Towers Cast Down, especially the questioning scene in Tol-in-Gaurhoth. That was brilliantly terrifying and this part in particular just lives rent-free in my head: “Finrod can feel the moment when Sauron realizes what he has done [...] he feels his face re-form, his bones knitting together - no - no, please - ‘I will un-make and re-make you, as many times as it takes’ “

thank you so much! and many apologies for my late response to these, afjdklsafd ive been sick and am now catching up on work and yes, Finrod and co ARE sitting in a corner staring at me as I determinedly ignore all my WIPs lmao but anyway. ok. going to talk about the entire chapter. under a cut as it's going to be a bit long lol.

So, chapter 13 was not initially planned at all. In fact (and you may be horrified to hear this), pretty much the entire first half of this fic has been mostly unplanned, because when I started working on towers I did not intend to include Finrod as more than a side character! You can kind of see it in this post which was what towers came out of - I wanted to write a story about Lúthien and Maglor, partly because they are a fascinating character combo and partly because I was really interested in the political implications of such a team-up for both the Noldor and the Sindar.

Like, with Finrod alive, Lúthien (presumably) feeling very positively towards at least one son of Fëanor, and Morgoth having been dealt a crushing blow by the combined might of the Noldor and the Sindar, does Thingol back down? Do Celegorm and Curufin? Would Lúthien and Beren feel the need to retire from the world if they had met more people who wholeheartedly supported their love, rather than being attacked at every turn? And (because this is a theme I remain fascinated by in the Silm) does any of it make any difference at all? After all, the Noldor are at war not just with Morgoth but also with the rest of the Valar, so how would being under the Doom play out during a Nirn that included the support of all the Elven kingdoms? These were the questions that I was really excited about answering when I started this fic.

When I began to write it, I was going to have the rescue play out in a chapter or two, max, and then have Finrod and maybe even Maedhros join the Silmaril squad. It was going to be so epic - but as I was writing, characters started to push back on what I was saying, lol. For instance, it took some convincing for the pragmatic Maedhros to want to even try to find out what happened to Finrod (never mind rescuing him!). No way, no how was he going to go to Angband. And after watching ten of Finrod's closest friends die for him, Beren would knock Finrod over the head with a chair and run away before he'd let Finrod follow him on any more of the quest. So that was right out.

And then the more I thought about the rescue, the more fascinated I became by Tol-in-Gaurhoth in general; it really represents a turning point in Leithian for a lot of characters. Lúthien and Huan come into their power and start taking control of the narrative; Finrod dies; Beren loses most of his agency (I find it fascinating that pre-Tol-in-Gaurhoth, Beren drives most of the plot - he becomes an outlaw, he makes it into Doriath, he decides to go on the Silmaril Quest, he goes to Nargothrond, etc - and afterwards he turns into something of a McGuffin for Lúthien, which is to say that most of what he does is either run away from Lúthien or follow her around); and Sauron and Morgoth go from having the upper hand to being caught by surprise over and over again. The difficulty in writing an AU about a key moment in the story - Finrod's death - being interrupted by new characters and events is that you still have to deal with the ramifications of that key moment, and now there are more people around, lol.

So anyway, after spending a lot of time thinking about this, I ended up wanting to tell two main stories with towers. The first is the story I originally meant to tell, that of Maglor and Lúthien wrecking Morgoth: but with the added twist that Maglor, particularly after watching how haunted Maedhros was in Tol-in-Gaurhoth, is motivated at least as much by guilt as he is by a desire to stick it to Morgoth and fulfill the Oath. He feels guilty that he didn't rescue Maedhros, and he feels guilty that he is going to Angband now and not then, and the sight of Finrod immediately post-Sauron's-hospitality is bringing a lot of painful memories back for him, so he is...not thinking very clearly. He is going to have to face a lot of that in Angband, both facing the stark reality of where Maedhros was for (REDACTED amount of time), and eventually accepting how fucking insane it was that Fingon's rescue actually worked.

The second story I want to tell is that of Finrod's reckoning with his own trauma and his own failure. Somebody else sent an ask about Finrod's character in this, so I won't go too much into all that here, but to summarize: Tol-in-Gaurhoth in many ways represents the failure and destruction of nearly everything Finrod worked on and valued in Middle-earth. Characters in the Silm tend to deal with failure by. well. murdering people. but our boi is pretty unique. How would he deal with being so thoroughly hurt in a universe in which he survives?

Both of these stories are about to actually kick off in the next few chapters (ahhh, chapter 14...where the original iteration of this story started...), but as I was working on chapter 14 onwards, I felt that towers as a whole needed a little space to breathe between the conclusion of what is essentially the World's Longest Prologue and the start of the "meat" of the story. Hence Maglor's conversation with Maedhros, which sets out the main (internal) conflicts their characters will be facing. For Maglor, it is:

Maglor drew a deep breath. "I only - the truth is that I should have done this - this quest - when you were captured. Thou art as precious as a Silmaril to me," he added, slipping into Quenya in the privacy of their chambers, "and I wish that I had had the courage to do as Lúthien did. That I am going now, and not then: it damns me. Did I care so little for our father's jewels - did I care so little for thy life - that I was content to sit behind walls until the daughter of Thingol reached out her hand and did what we could not?"

Maglor is intensely driven by guilt and a sense of competition with Lúthien, which will drive him to do. some Things.

For Maedhros, it is this:

Maglor laid his head on Maedhros' shoulder carefully. Maedhros felt his tears wetting his tunic; but he did not mind. "It is all right, Makalaurë," he said. "It is all well. Do thy great deed; and in fulfilling the Oath perhaps we will find a way to unmesh ourselves from Doom. I would like that," he added, very quietly, "for our younger brothers."

Maedhros, hearing about C&C's actions in Nargothrond, and watching Maglor be so torn apart by the Oath, is fully realizing here the impact the Oath is having on his brothers. A large part of his arc will revolve around dealing with the political and personal disaster that is Nargothrond; and he is counting on Maglor and Lúthien, maybe more than he himself realizes, to repeat Fingon's great deed.

And then we get to the Tol-in-Gaurhoth flashback! Finrod's arc in the coming chapters will be all about recovery and coming to terms with what happened to him - so it ought to be clear in the reader's mind what actually did happen to him. I tried to use my understanding of the characters of Sauron and Morgoth, as well as the canonical events of Tol-in-Gaurhoth, to work out what the experience most likely entailed (apart from the obvious, uh. getting eaten by wolves thing). We know that post-Silmaril-burning, Morgoth is incapable of assuming a fair form. From this we can extrapolate that likely those who serve him have something of a grudge against beautiful things - and Finrod is canonically very beautiful. So I think he would be a very tempting target for Sauron to smash into a pulp, alas.

Also, as several authors here on tumblr have pointed out, it's somewhat ludicrous that Sauron looked at the incredibly powerful golden-haired Elvenking in the company of a mortal and didn't recognize Finrod - unless Finrod managed to keep up some sort of enchantment that prevented Sauron from recognizing him. There's a lot of different ways this could go, but I essentially interpreted it as Finrod keeping up a spell of misdirection - Sauron knows there's something about him, it's on the tip of his tongue, but Finrod is preventing him from fully realizing their importance. So Sauron is essentially playing with his food here - I'm of the opinion that if Sauron knew what to look for with regards to Nargothrond, Finrod would stand no chance. Finrod certainly thinks so, anyway, and so he's using everything he can to keep Sauron from looking at him as anything more than a plaything. Unfortunately Finrod is a) very pretty and b) very much beloved, which gives Sauron lots of room for entertainment.

Unfortunately, and I do hate to admit this, the "unmaking and remaking" thing was almost a complete accident - I was almost done with the scene, and then I thought, "wait! I never mentioned facial injuries! fuck!" so. sauron got to be extra creepy to cover up for my lack of planning. xD

#asked and answered #thanks for your patience!! #sorry abt the wait ahhhhh #and all his towers cast down #finrod #maedhros #maglor #my writing

[birchbow]

I’m trying to envision Halore “social interactions are not my strongpoint” Travye navigating drone season - especially immediately after his breakup with Kurloz - and I cannot for the life of me see how it would happen unless there’s a cultural mechanism or tradition of playing drone season matchmaker for socially awkward, anxious, and depressed trolls - like, “sorry your relationship with Makara didn’t work out, but like, since you’re available . . . you wanna partner with my moirail whose matesprit died last sweep?”

Also also, since it is kind of a variant of the fuck-or-die trope, I can see so many troll dramas incorporating drone season as some major plot point. Although, maybe not with too much angst? Since I guess if a movie made you feel sad or angry enough about the whole situation, it would technically be seditious?

This is true, it's not his proudest season. But as with every other challenge he ends up facing, he stoically puts up with it lol. Present day as of PoF I'd imagine he mostly just kind of gets by in flush with somebody he finds tolerably attractive, and manages pitch by way of being very blunt baseline and then also a snarky bitch.

Right after he broke up with Kurloz he presumably was even less happy about it! But "hot, young, strong troll who's transparently broken up about losing somebody they cared about" seems like pretty good pity bait, so I could imagine that he managed to limp along on that until he started to get his feet back under him and got back his classic "Well Giving Up Isn't An Option So Let's Do The Damn Thing" personality lol.

RE: drone season in media, and seditious presentation of it, I've been going back and forth! I made mention real early on of drones and drone season and have never delivered on it because I've been percolating how I want to approach it sociologically, so here are I guess some drone thoughts.

As brutal and wild a system as it is to be like "there are drones that come and demand that you fuck", I am intrigued by the concept that those are just like, a natural part of the troll life-cycle. That the Mother Grub and her drones and the trolls are just all parts of the same species, who like insects can have wildly differing appearances and biological functions! And that in that way, drone season is actually like, outside the empire's control, and tbh super inconvenient for a powerful space-faring empire, since I'm of the assumption that the drones head out to trolls throughout the galaxy and continue to gather genetic material fairly regularly, showing up whenever they show up and triggering every troll in the area to contribute. Which means that like, sometimes the drones show up and if your soldiers don't have mates, they die? That could be real bad for your military!

Ofc it's possible and in fact almost inevitable for it to be politicized, and I'm sure there's some amount of spin RE: when you fuck you fuck for the empire, etc etc. But also if it's not actually the empire's doing, this is just how trolls work as a species (even on Beforus! a fascinating thought) the options for media rep of drone season get wider, I feel like.

If your characters don't want to contribute because "wahh, but contributing slurry to the meat grinder of the war machine BAD" then it wouldn't be acceptable, but it seems like a pretty reasonable point of drama to be like "oh man if I don't fuck I die, that's pretty upsetting" without having to be overtly seditious, as long as the drones are only sort of imperial in nature!

As with most of my xeno headcanons this is ofc subject to change with every different fic I write lol. But those are the thoughts I've been mulling around, at least as they pertain to the question!

#ask time!

[khaotic-neutrxl]

Jinx/Powder: An In-Depth Analysis (Of Her Zodiac and Identity)

[Note: This analysis is entirely just an interpretation! I am not completely certain of anything! Just want to give a perspective on Jinx that I'm passionate about, with all the nuances and little things I find to have meaning. As Christian Linke said, he wanted viewers to find their own answers in this series. So that's what this post is. Sorry for the upcoming essay, but bare with me if you can!!!]

[Also Note: If my writing sounds pretentious or wordy I actually genuinely apologize, took too many literature classes as a kid, and my tism really affects my writing. Promise it's just tism, I'm not feeling a certain way or a robot! Maybe, idk...🤖)

First I would LOVE to start off with not only her astrological sign...but ALSO how the symbolism in this series really fleshes it out.

I would like to think that since Arcane is very focused on things of symbolic nature (ex. drawing connections to Jinx's entire design to her childhood self down to her face shape, having moments that show her childhood innocence in subtle/symbolistic ways, her color scheme connecting her to Vi, etc) that Arcane itself would similarly have a lot more meaning in small things than what might have been seen at first.

To begin this, I want to start of with the sign I see the most in her character (may not be the most agreed upon, BUT PLEASE HEAR ME OUT...

🐟 Pisces 🐟

Ah, yes. The fishies. The sensitive, emotional, intuitive, psychic-psychotic, trusting, adaptable, scatterbrained blue little baby of the stars. But for Jinx it is more than just the fishies!

I feel like Jinx also has a fire in her. A fire like her sister, just put out at times by the water sign of Pisces. I mean, the fascination she finds in explosions, tendency toward fiery aggravation, passionate creativity, and heart-driven traits... I feel like Aries also suits her. But why not both? Because that's possible, they're neighbors on the chart. So that could mean that she's on the cusp between those two signs, having both traits simultaneously.

And what exactly is the cusp of Pisces-Aries so fittingly called?

The Cusp of Rebirth

It's the SYMBOLISM! (maybe not literally, but in many different small aspects!!!)

Not only would Jinx being on that cusp explain why she connects with Vi (who definitely has strong Aries placements behind that Taurus sun!) but ALSO,

HER ENTIRE ARC IS FOCUSED ON REBIRTH.

From Powder, to Jinx.

The scene with her and Silco in the water, when he does than whole dip in the river thing, also focuses on rebirth. Her rebirth, just as Silco says he did the day Vander betrayed him.

"That day, I let a weak man die. And another was reborn." -Silco, talking to Jinx in the water

And after Silco says those words, he lays Jinx in the water to let Powder die, and allow her to be reborn as Jinx. Because to him, Jinx is perfect. And Powder holds onto so much fear of pain, in a way, he wants her to let that go.

Not only is the symbolism of water-related elements of their relationship SCREAMING water signs to me (Jinx being Pisces, Silco being Scorpio), but the fact that in this intensely deep moment REBIRTH is the focal point.

And what better to embody that than the Pisces-Aries Cusp? The Cusp of Rebirth? A scene that literally is meant to represent Powder dying, and Jinx coming out the other side, as a stronger more authentic identity for herself above all. To leave her pain behind, as Silco said, and come out stronger than before. To have strength. Something she ALWAYS admired and idolized Vi for, trying to mimic it in the spirit of her older sister who she looked up to more than anything.

In this way, she became stronger, as she always wanted to be. For herself, but in a way, also for Vi. As a way to internally and externally prove something she always wanted to.

"You never left. I always heard you. Shadows in the streets, prickles on the back of my neck... Your voice---pushing me, picking me up." -Jinx, talking to Vi

She adapted (to her environment), as Pisces do, and transitioned to a form of herself she viewed as higher, better, stronger. Her. I mean, Neptune (the ruling planet of Pisces) is literally the planet of transcendence and mysticism.

Which also, somewhat, reminds me of how she somehow intuitively cracked some ANCIENT RUNES (probably outdated to the point of illegibility) and made a weapon in, like, a quarter of the time Viktor and Jayce did (no offense Viktor my beloved). Her Pisces intuition can even be drawn back to when she dodges that attack from the Firelights---not even seeing it come from behind her, just feeling it. Very Pisces-esc.

BUT THATS NOT ALL.

There's even more SYMBOLISM!!!!

(regarding her Pisces placement, a more compressed list so I can at least TRY and make this post a little shorter).

1. Butterflies! Her butterfly gadget, and the way that Fortiche really is specific on how they portray things, really spoke to me. Butterflies symbolize TRANSFORMATION and CHANGE, along with comfort, connection to the spirit realm, and a need for gentleness.

2. Her bunny stuffed animal! It is a sensitive, emotional piece specifically given to her from Vi, yes. But also, in the Chinese zodiac, the Rabbit quite literally is the equivalent to the Pisces zodiac! No coincidence Vi gave it to her, it suits her very well to me. Quick, swift, witty, vigilant, ingenious, sensitive, fearful, smart...so many things that scream Jinx! And her pigtails remind me of floppy bunny ears...

3. Color scheme! For both Pisces and the corresponding Chinese zodiac, her color scheme really resonates with the official ones related to this star sign. Blue, pink, purple...very much a lot of the colors you see with Jinx!

4. Water Symbolism! Water signs usually only genuinely are understood by other water signs, like she was with Silco (Scorpio). Not only that, but the "Fishbones" she literally talks to (spiritual in a way, speaking to the spirit and representation of Silco) is WATER ORIENTED. Aka fishy oriented. It's a MAJOR focal point that is built up to in the end, the finale. It's what she uses to not only "show them all" like Silco wanted all along, using a weapon she made representing him, it also helped define herself as Jinx, in a way. Genuinely, it seemed to me like a bridge between them that connects them, even after him being gone. And that connection would be very suited with Scorpio and Pisces, two signs that understand each others' depths (not to say Silco doesn't definitely have some big Pisces placements in his chart, really would explain their bond similar to Vi and Vander).

If that's not a water sign I don't know what is.

There is so much more. The shrine she made for Mylo and Claggor, which is so spiritually connected and resonant in itself. The fact that she never comes in first place (very Aquarius-Pisces vibes, but that's for another rant, possible Aquarius-Capricorn rising Jinx!), and the way that she genuinely knows and admits when she makes mistakes. Calls them mistakes, doesn't try to hide that but is deeply ashamed by it, mournful. And it EATS HER ALIVE not being able to resonate with people, letting people down, not being good enough for others. She DOES care. Doesn't shrug it off or deny her mistakes, they just make her cry and wish for what could have been [insert song here]. And regret, deeply. Nothing surface-level for Jinx. Everything is deep, kinda like water (lol).

But also, just to leave off here, look at the Creator and Writer, Christian Linke's, birth charts (both Vedic and Western). Why's that relevant? Because he really was one of the first, if not the first, who saw the flesh and bone in these characters! He pitched ARCANE! And, as he said in the documentary, he really put and left more than a chunk of himself within this series. If his emotions and diction, which connect DIRECTLY to a person's chart, influenced Jinx at all...I want to bring it up! Because the connections are a bit insane to me. They're way too coincidental.

So, if Christian had as much emotional input as the documentary talks about, I would like to shed light on how his chart could influence that. Because the connections and similarities are so incredible. That, and the fact that it was even officially posted that she has an Aquarius placement makes it all the more mindblowing! Makes me love science and astrology even more.

So I'm just gonna leave his chart there, for giggles, a little snack for thought :)

Anyway that concludes my rant! At least in this post! I would love to go on more but I don't intend on making people read a book, even though this practically is. Maybe I can talk more about her big three placements, or big six...another time. Thank you for sticking around if you made it this far! Hope this gave a (maybe) new perspective on Jinx!

If someone already made these points I'm sorry, I suck at finding stuff on the internet and probably totally missed it to be completely honest. I pinky promise I have no negative intentions with this post! Still, I hope this brought at least one interesting thought to the table, and I also hope ppl are as excited for the new season as I am!

#jinx arcane #jinx #zodiac #character analysis #insane in the membrane #unhand me #rant post #sorry for the rant #autism #jinx league of legends #jinx lol #release me #character rant #bad at tags #i hate tagging #tagging is hard #tagging game #slaying

[malevolentcast]

-Breaks down the door for the 50th time as i come bounding in with more questions. But carefully places it back on it's hinges before i scurry off once more- (I cannot thank you enough for answering all my silly Q's. So here they are numbered once again) 1) Will we ever find out who it was that Lorick the Cana helped escape the Dreamlands? 2) What was the breathing creature in the walls of the Red Right Hand? Was that creature there cuz it was connected to the underground mines? Or was it something else entirely? 3) What would you say is the most drastic outcome to result from a series of choices made by the patrons? (as I am now a patron myself, it's fascinating to find out just how many choices could so easily be connected to each other and have lead to some *very* different circumstances if a different series of choices were made) 4) Are there any meaningful conversations between John and Arthur that you've had to cut out of an episode cuz it just didn't fit well or the timing of it wasn't right, etc? (If so would they be something that might pop up again or have they been incorporated somewhere else already?) 5) What killed Matthew under the Larson Estate?? Was it the creature in the mines or something else. (I didn't think it was the creature in the mines but if it wasn't I had no idea what it was that killed him.) 6) Was it guaranteed that Arthur would die if they went back into the mines to rescue the cultists? Or was it the resulting circumstances of choices made along the way? And as always, I would like to compliment at the end of all my Q's by this time saying how much i love and appreciate that you have John and Arthur's relationship being so intimate and caring without it being romance. That platonic love between characters is something I crave but is so so hard to find in media. This is honestly one of the huge reasons I love Malevolent so much so thank you for that. And sorry for the novel of text....whoops

1) maybe

2) who knows

3) prison pits from not trusting John

4) probably but I reuse them

5) who knows

6) resulting

Thank you!

[eye-of-yelough]

sending ask about aeryn

i would give my life for you, kind stranger.

OKAY SO.

Aeryn is my go-to character to play as in fantasy rpgs, basically. atm he’s only in Skyrim, Elden Ring and the Sims, although that one doesn’t. yknow. i mean it doesn’t really count i just made him for fun.

the best way to describe him is “guy who’s love language is acts of service. who falls in love very easily.”

so he joins the dark brotherhood in skyrim and the volcano manor in elden ring. naturally.

(i can’t think of anything specifically to give a content warning for so let’s just say he’s a fucked up little sex freak and i’m gonna be talking about it a little under the cut)

more ⤵️

these posts articulate his Vibe much better than i can. he really just. can’t conceptualise a life that doesn’t involve him devoting himself to a person or a cause. he’s also, as much as he tries to convince himself that he just wants a normal life, completely addicted to chaos and misery. he’s also kind of a hyper-sexual sadomasochist which really makes everything so much more Messy™️

he’s also trans. but he isn’t. but he is. he just never medically (magically? fantasy logic) transitions, makes no attempt to pass, except maybe his voice, which is very rough and nasally, and doesn’t correct people when they get it wrong cos he thinks it’ll get in the way of people wanting to have sex with him 🤷 a slut’s gotta have priorities i guess.

also his way of carrying himself is distinctly not feminine. not really masculine either just. alien. chiana from farscape core. now that i think about it he may be a little based off of her. grey skinned slut who wears black and moves animalistically. hmmm.

in Skyrim he’s a bosmer who was seduced by a vampire who wanted him as a blood thrall but the idiot after a while the idiot turned him instead of draining him of everything and killing him. he Came Back Wrong. he’s also not the Dragonborn. can you even imagine. anyway. Listener. Stealth Archer. you know the drill. images⤵️

he’s much more interesting in Elden Ring. because it’s Lore is so vague about the Tarnished’s background, i just revamp his skyrim story slightly. he was a member of religious assassins (confesser starting class) but was betrayed by their leader and he was burned alive in the underground sanctuary. (au, obviously not how it happens) anyway, he has no memory of this. he’s very resistant to the Golden Order, finds the guidance of “grace” very disturbing but also. very difficult resist following, even subconsciously. he has no desire to assume the mantle of Mighty Elden Lord. Patches The Untethered fucking fascinates him and he just. imprints on that poor bald man like a baby bird. literally twirling his hair and kicking his feet and giggling at every attempted homicide. which eventually leads him to the volcano manor

and by the outer gods does he devote himself to them so quickly. so intensely-and why is this becoming a blow by blow of his whole elden ring story. whoops. anyway. when he finds out melina must die for him he Loses His Fucking Shit. it is simply unacceptable. INCOMPREHENSIBLE that someone dies for him. luckily, Shabriri comes along and offers a lovely and elegant solution :)

here’s where what i said before about him not liking the golden order and hating the idea of being elden lord comes in. yes, he can’t imagine himself as a Lord. but as it turns out, when pushed into a corner. he can imagine himself as a Martyr. an ambassador for the misbegotten, the demi humans (are they different words for the same race? i genuinely don’t know) the omens, the nomadic merchants, those who live in death. he can warp this story about one guys selfish journey toward becoming a lord into an epic romantic tragedy about the selfless actions of the saviour of the downtrodden, who disintegrated all that divides and distinguishes. <3 may chaos take the world.

i Am Aware that his outfit is very silly. but it’s part of his character. ambassador for the omens (cloak) and nomadic merchants (idiot hat) and those who live in death (prince of death staff. not seen but it’s there) he used to wear alberichs fancy wizard set but after being burned by Frenzy i imagine him trying to put them back on and not being able to because. burns. painful. so he throws on the soft cloak to protect himself from the elements and goes about his business. half naked at all times. it’s a serve.

i tried putting him in Dragon Age, in both Origins and Inquisition, but i just can’t make him fit in there for some reason. i reckon i could make him work as a Maharial Morrigan-mancer in origins with a bit of canon divergence and a lotta willpower (my own, not like. the games willpower skill you can level up) but that would require to play origins and that’s a pain by itself if i’m being brutally honest. i’ve tried him twice in inquisition with a lovehate cassandra romance that ends just So Bad but. and not to be dramatic here but. i genuinely think he would commit suicide immediately after closing that damn breach. like i just cant think of a single reason he would stay with those people.

anyway. i think that’s finally it? i warned you it would be long. still feel like i’m forgetting something. thank you so much to anyone who’s read this far, i love you with my whole heart

#oc aeryn #your daily dose of idiocy #uh. sure why not #elden ring #skyrim #i don’t think asks show up in the main tags anyway. #once again i am in the weird and rare position of having said all that could be said in the main post #and having nothing to add it the tags. it’s weird.

[dobythealpaca]

larry ideas??? im listening 👀🍿

JAHDHSJDHFJDJJD WOOOOH YEAH LARRY TIME-

So this will be all over the place since I'm terrible at organising and will also include some ideas about Bing and the rejects-

(Also some of this stuff is like a work in progress, I will be fully fledging it out I just am not very good at it or writing about characters in general shjdkshdjdjd...)

So Larry is a very emotionally distant character, he just lacks the ability to feel emotions in general, especially ones which are positive or good.

He has a very objective way at looking at life because of this and is very good at making logical and calculated decisions (seeing as he doesn't have emotions to get in the way of it). This is to a fault however because it can lead him to being very harsh and cruel with how he acts towards Bing and the Clones, and just people in general, as well as lacking empathy in certain situations. Like someone could be dealing with the loss of a pet and he'd most likely list off all the things that you won't have to do anymore such as "spending money on it trying keep it alive" and "wasting time doing pointless activities with it"

His relationships with both Bing and The Clones are quite mutual-

He works with Bing, who hired him as his assistant, and doesn't see it as anything more than a professional relationship. Bing however, believes they're both the bestest of buddies till the end of time! Who would die for each other no matter what! And always have each others back!... which isn't exactly true-

They met by coincidence outside a theatre and Bing being the guy he is, was fascinated by Larry, mainly his eyepatch interested him-

Since Bing was young he's always wanted to be like those cliché villains in movies. This is because of how relatable they were to him- sad backstories, appear lonely and don't have parents (perfectly relatable for an orphan with no friends!). So he actively tries to be like one, even in adulthood, which is a reason for why he calls himself "Evil Director" and tries so hard to be evil. He doesn't have to but he wants to be just like those villains. When he met Larry, he saw it as a perfect opportunity to have a super evil assistant! Which is how they began working together.

Larry and the Clones on the other hand were very different. At first Larry didn't care for the Clones whatsoever, he didn't see them as much more than just clones. Even when considering the immoral nature of cloning, he didn't stop Bing. And afterwards when they were deciding what to do with the rejects, Larry was originally going to test on them as he saw it as a opportunity to discover new things. Again this was due to his objective and emotionless mindset, seeing opportunities in places where emotions would usually overpower and discourage you.

Luckily Bing felt differently and suggested that they shouldn't test on them yet as it just didn't feel right to him. Then later on, Larry found Bing sitting in the reject room trying to get to know them. Before he knew it Bing was attached to them- and that's how they became a kind-of-family!

Had it not been for Bing, the Clones may not have been the happiest in Larry's presence :(

Now Larry is the one who takes them out and about to places however, he isn't really fun about it. He's very strict when it comes to them messing around in public and like I previously said, he can be very harsh. He's this way not just because he doesn't understand fun, but due to the fact all the rejects don't understand they're Clones. (Apart from Thomas who actually saw everyone else. The rest just believe they're a strange family as they all look somewhat similar, although some do have their suspicions 👀)

And so Larry doesn't allow them to see anyone or anyone else to see them. They'll leave the house at odd times and go to quiet places in the town and park where they can fish or relax without being spotted. This however can lead to shenanigans and getting in trouble, which Larry doesn't appreciate in the slightest. However he does tend to feel strange when the rejects are enjoying themselves.

Now Larry never really had a "childhood" in a sense. He, like Bing, was an orphan. They both never met their parents and didn't have friends either. However they both grew up in very different environments.

Brought into the Red Army at a very young age, he really did not have time or environment to develop healthily, therefore lacking in the ability to just feel emotions. (YEAH THAT'S RIGHT HES AND EX RED ARMY MEMEBR-)

The Red Army use to be a lot harsher compared to present times, which is why Larry was basically stripped from his emotions back then. It was an old method done in an effort to make super disciplined soldiers, and it was made easier due to his age. Although not continued now the army is still a pretty terrible place.

This is why he is very skilled when it come to fighting and gaining information. He worked and trained in the Red army as a spy and soldier since the moment he was forced in it, helping him develop skills earlier leading him to becoming a higher ranked soldier sooner. He was a very good when it came to shooting, he wouldn't miss and had a very sharp eye *wink wink*. Although that helped him greatly with his physical abilities, it really did not help when it came to his personality and emotional state whatsoever :(

Eventually at some point something went wrong which lead to his "expulsion" from the red army.

He had been given a target to eliminate, no matter what. And although it seemed simple, he couldn't bring himself to do it when he encountered them. So he ended up letting them go.

Afterwards there was an outrage, with it mainly coming from the leader himself. It was then decided Larry would no longer be serving to the army and dealt with him in the standard Red army way, partially taking away one of his best senses.

(This black and white version of the image since the actual one has blood in it, will post the actual one later!)

Afterwards he was thrown in their prison without treatment until they could decide on what they wanted to use him for. However he managed to escape before then, leaving the army and getting his eye treated but forever having to wear an eyepatch.

Because of all that he now struggles when it comes to finding himself and his interests later in life when he's free from the army. He never had the chance to really do that and so now, when he has nothing to do, he feels useless in a sense. He can't communicate with people very well regarding his emotions and has nothing to help him or distract him. So he resorts to reading but that's about it.

However he's got a good kind-of-family who'll help him through it <:] Tomatoredd being a good contrast to Larry seeing as they tend to feel to many emotions, Scribs to hug and look after when feeling frustrated, Torm to relax and relate with, Thomas and Matthew to help him look for hobbies and any interests he might have, and Bing his, not yet but eventually, beloved bestie <:]

And yeah! That's just about it on my Larry headcannons so far! There's some stuff I've still not included like the nitty gritty stuff in the army, multiple things regarding the clones and just other things in general akdjdjdj- I'll be making art about them eventually when the ideas are fully down! Maybe some of these will slightly change but for now this is how I see him!

(Literally TYSM if you've read this far I'm going to cuddle you pat you on the head shake ur hand and love you forever-)

#Ik not many people read this since its VERY LONG AJDBHDJD #But literally if you have 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💙💜💙💜💙💜💙💜💙💜 #I will come and track you down to hug you- #Like it means a genuine lot if you have #Since I ramble and aren't very clear- #eddsworld larry #ew larry #eddsworld bing #ew bing #eddsworld rejects #ew rejects #eddsworld headcanons #Also ik some of this doesn't match up with the comics #But shhhh it doesn't matter if you pretend it doesn't exist 👀👀👀👀 #I just like messing around with characters that have almost nothing to them #Very generic probably just some dude- #And booom- #Skrunkle up their while life B) #AJDJJDJD anyways this took multiple days to formulate I hope u guys like it!!! #And dw I completely understand if you couldn't or didn't read all of it!!! It's a lot and very wordy and big sjhdjshfhdj

[randomnameless]

I'll say it, I really liked Field of Revenge especially from a villain perspective. Cause for one, it's a heartbreaking chapter/battle especially if you're BL fan (granted you can mitigate that by recruiting but let's assume you don't). And second, it shows Supreme Leader at her probably most villainous with her emotional warfare i.e victim blaming, and basically deciding to spare no one. The King of Delusion scene is infuriating but in a "omg, she's dastardly" way.

Oh!

Yeah, I loved it because even if this was the first route I played, I was left with the impression that bar "wow am I supposed to know those characters?" the map conveyed what the narration had been hammering - no matter what, Supreme Leader and pals will break through to reach their goals, even if it means killing named characters I'm supposed to be sad about.

After playing the other routes -

It's again even more wonderful, because we have the "uwu don't want to kill her uwu" options in dialogues, but when it's her turn to apparently get this option, we have "Dimitri must die" and all of his generals with him (iirc this is a rout mission?).

"no u" also lampshades how Dimitri tries to understand why the frick he is being invaded, and why this war is happening, and just why the fuck he has to fight - but Supreme Leader doesn't bother explaining anything to him. Even when he is on his knees, she beheads him, after asking Hubert to give her an onion to get a few tears and goes "if only we were born in a world of peace" when, uh, she just beheaded him a few seconds ago when he was at her mercy, and specifically ordered at the beginning of the map to kill him.

Even Rhea, who is PTSD'ing hard (she brought back Seiros the Warrior's costume!) comes to regret having to fight like this - of course not because Supreme Leader's character, but because she's Willy's scion - but Supreme Leader dgaf, gives a Supreme Reply (tm) and off with her head (ah wait, it's in the next chapter).

Her interactions in this chapter are great, we play through the tonal dissonance - which is why Supreme Leader, only when everyone is dead (and Rhea retreated), contemplates the futility of Dimitri's death, blaming it on Uncle and how she wished things could have turned out differently...

Just after playing a chapter where she ignores and/or straight out refuses to be plays a different script than the one she gave at the beginning.

That's what I find fascinating and like about her character, she can say X to her "trusted" ones in private, but say Y in public - even if we all know, since we were privy to the "private" exchange that she wants to do X.

This is again shown in the next chapter - to Billy, Supreme Leader says she wants to obliterate Nabateans - but when her army is all around, she asks Rhea to surrender.

Is it only for PR? Is it to gain Billy's trust? Is she ever telling the "truthful truth" of what she wants to anyone (save for Hubert)?

IIRC some people made more detailled posts on the safflower (the flower of CF?) but I don't remember them that well.

Tl; dr : that chapter rocks.

#anon #replies #this is the chapter where if you don't recruit anyone you have real consequences from your actions #if the invasion of derdriu wasn't clear enough #now you're killing people who are defending their home #finally stakes and no over cooked steaks! #everyone during the fight 'express sadness regret and anger at having to fight' #Supreme Leader when everyone is finally dead or gone 'ah sure i am very sad look i'm crying if only dimitri didn't have to die' #'but i had to do it it's all uncle's fault' #and the parallel with the last chapter of AM? golden #FE16