#and don't het me wrong it's fun and all just. so none of you are picking up on the girls...? it's the misogyny. you know.

[ps1snake]

loving ththe dunmesh boom in art hating the takes on characters but most importantly can we talk about woman ever or shpuld i just kill myself

#feels weord to jump from falin/marcille being like basically the only ship to like. yaoi funfest #and don't het me wrong it's fun and all just. so none of you are picking up on the girls...? it's the misogyny. you know. #mi #im bot even ssying this as an avid shipper or anything to be clear. dunmesh isbt that kind of media to me. i

[that-nerd-who-writes-fanfiction]

So ever since I found mlm and wlw stories (especially fanfics), my interest in het romance decrese a lot, and what I search for is just the dynamic between mc (male) and male lead or mc (female) and female lead...I don't want to read mc (female) and male lead or mc (male) and female lead...And what I want to read mostly are just mlm or wlw stories for romance....

What do you think is happening to me? Is it really weird?

There is absolutely nothing weird about what you’re enjoying reading.

As for what is happening, I don’t think there is anything happening so I really wouldn’t worry. Learning what you like in media as in life is just part of growing up and learning how to person. Fortunately or unfortunately, that never stops and now matter how old you are, you can always learn something new about the world around or who you are as a person.

I can’t give you any answers, I’m only a stranger on the internet and only you’ll have all the information you need.

It could just be that it’s something new, a new genre you like and it might changechange like the wind. It could be that you enjoy the dynamics between the characters you’re reading about and they happen to by mlm or wlw. It could be a lack of content for the het relationships in the fandoms you’re in. It might be that you’re seeing yourself in the characters or that you’re starting to explore other identities, either for yourself or just for curiosity of wanting to know, and that’s okay too. It could be the separation from real life and fiction and enjoying something that is completely separate to the real world, or the world around you, while so much other stuff is going on in the news everyday. It could be something else entirely.

There’s no right or wrong answer to any of it. Whatever the reason, there is absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying reading any genre, be it queer romance, het romance, found family, or something as unrelated as sci-fi fantasy with convoluted plots and over complicated characters. Nothing you read says anything about you as a person and there’s no moral value attached to enjoying reading any genre. It just means that you enjoy reading it.

There is nothing wrong with you.

I read all sorts of books, fanfics, poetry, articles. I’m out here quoting the great gatsby or various fanfics one day, then a song of Achilles or Crier’s War the next, and Plato or The Iliad the day after that. None of it changes who I am, just what kind of information I carry around which in turn helps me interact with the world around. Hopefully I learn something along the way, but if not then at least I had fun.

I’ve been out as queer for a few years now and spent five ish years (give or take) in the closet before that. I’ve met a lot of people from all walks of life who feel all sorts of ways, who’ve enjoyed reading all sorts of things. Some who’ve known exactly who they are and others who are still figuring it out, some who thought they knew until they realised they’d got it wrong so went back to figuring it out. And that goes for all things, hobbies, interests, religion, politics, sexuality, gender. People change and grow and learn and that’s such a beautiful, brilliant thing in life.

No one has all the answers, we’re all just looking to figure it out as we go and enjoy the journey getting there.

And all of it is absolutely and completely okay, but more than that it’s human. Take your time, and in the meantime, enjoy reading whatever you like because if you’re enjoying it, then it’s worth it.

And feel free to send recs of any genre because I’m always looking for more to read :)

I hope this helps, anon.

-ThatNerd :)

#anon ask #asks #i don’t know how to tag this #not my usual stuff #it got a little more rambling than I expected but my point stands

[ultfreakme]

Can I ask for advice? I read your answers to ask, and it seems about random thing too (not just fandom characters)....So, I just got into JJK this year, and my friend is estatic (they were a fan for almost 3 years). They ship yuuta/maki, choso/yuki and gojo/utahime (I think the first 2 ships are cute and I don't mind either ships, too). But when I told them that I ship gojo/getou, they become defensive and told me, "but they're only bffs and it's only platonic relationships and bromance. It's not BL you know..." and I was iritated like, it's okay to ship what we like right? Do you think I should hide my love for this ship from my friend and preted only like het ships, too?

P.s Love your analysis on JJK (especially satosugu and itajun). Now I get more of the story, because of your blog. Thanks to you I also ship ItaJun 😄.

Also your answer to that anon (who loves BL /GL more than het romance), I kinda get their feeling. I'm so grateful to found your blog... Hope you have a wonderful day...

Absolutely not don't hide your love for satosugu! A ship doesn't have to be from the BL section to be mlm. Someone sent me an ask talking about how Blue Flag's end couple is two boys and it was published as a shonen manga.

I'm gonna be a bit of a bitch....and say well Gojo/utahime, Choso/Yuki, Yuuta/Maki can't be shipped because JJK is shonen, it's not romance or shojo. Also they're all bros and friends too! None of those couples said I love you, none of them kissed or really hung out all that much and none of these are canon(although tbh I would argue that based on subtext and a billion comments from anime production and creative staff it practically is) so......

Okay bitch moment over.

You're nice to your friend and their ships despite being ambivalent about one, they have to show the same courtesy to you. They don't have to start shipping it too but like it's just good friend behavior to be accepting. If it's a point of tension, it's best not to argue over it, or try to convince the other person of something. If your friend can't hear you out and dismisses you entirely, THEY are in the wrong, never you.

Also, I've often hid my own interests and loves in the past because my friends were super judgemental(like, "oh ew how could you like anime?" or "oh gross that's two boys/girls that doesn't work"). None of them stuck around me long and I wasn't happy being friends with them. I was miserable pretending to be something I'm not, even if it was something as silly as my interests.

Nowadays though, I do have friends who don't get shipping but they're respectful about it. End lesson; Don't ever change yourself, how you express yourself or your interests for another person. You are totally valid for liking the things you do and if others can't accept that, that's their problem. If they can't let this go or keep telling you to not talk about it or try to change your mind....well I hate to be extreme and this is worst case scenario, but, ditch em, there's better people out there who'd take you as you are.

Thank you so much!!! I love doing metas and analysis like it makes the experience so much richer and there's new depths to enjoy~~ glad you enjoy it!! This is super sweet <3<3 (\^_^/)

The BL/GL thing is so relatable and I think more recently, a pretty common experience for people in the anime/manga fandoms. I used to feel super alone with it but hopefully because of social media we can all feel a lot better in knowing we're not alone. When it comes to fiction, just do what's fun and makes you happy.

Have a nice day too anon!!!

#riki asks

[merveiilles]

// Look, I've seen a lot of posts here on tumblr regarding "BANNING CIS.HET MUSES" because their presence on your blog is "anti-lgbt+ and anti-nb+" I just woke up from a long sleep... but I've seen so many posts about this, I'm annoyed.

LOOK, I AM LGBT+ MMK? But straight up BANNING cis/het muses in the rpc is TOO "WOKE". Look! I have nothing against lgbt+/non-binary folk. You can write your muses HOW EVER YOU WANT. That's the FUNNNN of it. But forcing the entire RPC to BAN something that's part of the actual REAL LIFE is just cruel and forceful. (you know how many lgbt+/nb+ friends I have in real life??? about 3! Everyone else, family included is cis/het! And you know what, I love them. They're amazing people. I couldn't live without them. there is NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING CIS/HET) I myself, have a handful of lgbt+ muses. (Everyone to my knowledge is binary. simply because I PERSONALLY don't see any of my muses being non-binary??? Might take another look, but i have so many muses I can't keep up sometimes jgjkdbgfn) But I'm NOT GOING TO TAKE A MUSE that is canonically a cis gender and straight-- okay, sometimes I change it because I can SEE IT BEING A REALITY. I VIBE WITH THE IDEA OF THAT MUSE BEING DIFFERENT-- but some muses, I'll use Deathstroke as an example. I CAN'T SEE that muse being gay and going by alternate pronouns or something. I just CAN'T. Again, I myself am LGBT+, but I can't see this man being anything but what he goes by in canon. It just...doesn't vibe with the characterization in my head. and frankly, changing a character like that to fit into this mold you guys are making makes me UNCOMFORTABLE!!!! and you know what?????? THIS IS ALL FOR FUN. SO PLEASE STOP FORCING THINGS ON PEOPLE. IF SOMEONE WANTS TO WRITE CIS/HET MUSES, LET THEM!!! IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!! If you're so desperate to write with an lgbt/nb+ muse on someone's muli, ASK which muses of theirs is lgbt/nb+. It doesn't hurt to ask. I'm sure someone will have a few or a lot. But again, I myself am LGBT+ but I'm not going to change my muse for the rpc's forceful ban they are trying to put in place. As I said, changing some muses drastically MAKES ME UNCOMFORTABLE and will make it very hard to write them imo. I'll feel very out of character. And again, I do have lgbt+ muses! Just ask for them if you're really wanting to write with them!!! But PLEASE STOP TRYING TO FORCE PEOPLE TO CHANGE THINGS LIKE THIS, WHEN THE NORMAL THING IN THE WORLD. IS THAT CIS/HET PEOPLE EXIST!!! And trying to erase them in the rpc is not okay???? I'm supporting all sides here! So don't be coming crying to me. Just unfollow/soft block and move on if you have issues with this. And frankly if you support the cis/het ban, unfollow/soft block me. I don't want you here. I'm too tired to fight this, but please don't come complaining that I have cis/het muses on my blog. I'm sorry, they exist???? THIS IS MY BLOG. MY RULES. Thanks, Kippy. <33333

#:☆: random babbling ( out of character ) #:☆: hey! listen up! ( psa ) #ranting tw

[munamania]

16, 23, 25

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc.)

this'll quickly get into petty territory ok let's see. well so i think in general the cookie cutter fandom trope tendencies suck absolute ass and take all the fun out of actually playing with character dynamics and like. analyzing them idk!!! like it's BORING not everyone fits into. golden retriever/black cat dumb/smart fucking. idk you get it. you're taking away what's compelling and unique abt individual people and stories and writing. i think people did that to robin and nancy a bit and it made me want to scream and turned me away from the fandom quicker cause they were the last part of s4 i found myself caring abt. and let me just say this. it's like people are so goddamn annoying in general about gay ships and i wont pretend like ppl are just cool and great about gay male ships but like. at least SO many people get into them that you're bound to get some actually interesting content. it's fucking bleak out here for the lesbians when people just immediately try to slot them into top/bottom etc dynamics. and don't engage with them as separate characters at all. defining women by their relationships except theyre both women(ish) so you're just making them uninteresting overall. sorry ik it's not that serious esp when the majority of the fans of lesbian ships are queer girls. anyway then they dont even engage with het relationships or the people that do are ppl are like. genuinely cishet and i'd not... interact w them on here idk lol. also i ended up getting pissy about bi steve bc ppl were so anti nancy being anything but hyperheterosexual when to ME, formerly dykenance, she had the markings of a lesbian. she had a very clearly sorta close tense jealous etc friendship and she gets NONE of the love. idc actually abt bi steve like it's fine wider fandom just pissed me off. we all know this.

23. ship you've unwillingly come around to

ummm i dont think i've been super anti anything personally let me think. ummmm. idk why i can only think of st this is absurd i dont even engage with that much anymore. like i guess jonathan and steve i used to not care about but now im like yeah sure kings. why not. oh also faberry lol. cause rachel used to annoy me too much but now im like well in her own committed dream annoying teen girl way she was kinda hilarious... and i think they were in weird lesbian love and that was lost along the way but in my heart they rekindled after high school maybe. at some point. like quinn came to one of her big shows... idc

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

i think b*lers need to just have fun with their ship and not care about canon that much. like yes yeah gay rep etc whatever but u dont even seem like you're having fun u just want to be right. anyway. GENERALLY it's fucking hilarious to me when people bring up idk media literacy and -coding and etc but it's very evident that they have not ever ever taken a film class in their life or. engaged with media analysis outside of fandom contexts. babes dont try to just use words to sound smart. also again generally stop just advertising or criticizing a show based on Gay Representation. also don't complain about female characters not being well written when u dont engage with them regardless over any possible man that you can. sorry just complaining abt the same shit over and over. ME hi im the problem it's me. jk im not wrong

let me be a haterrrr <3

#certifiedhaterdyke era #asks #long post

[lumilasi]

001: bnha, 003: Tomura

(Ik kinda obvious ┐(ﾟ ～ﾟ )┌ but mb ppl will then try asking about others!)

Haha yeah, we'll see!

001:

Favorite character: Tomura, naturally. Also I really like Aizawa too

Least Favorite character: it tends to change between certain characters but rn its Hawks. There's a long and actually complicated story on how he ended up on that list as, unlike others on it I started on neutral grounds with him lol (which is an achievement tbh. Its not easy to get me to go from 'neutral' to 'don't wanna see this one on screen' lmao)

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): I don't really have many? I only count those where I can't really see the characters with anyone else but each other typically, soo..Shigadabi, Erasermic, Shinshou x Denki. Pretty much any other ship I might've used on fics I'm neutral on and just used them for the plot.

Character I find most attractive: ehh...I wouldn't use this term necessarily, I'd rather just say the most interesting/fun looking. Tomura. I like how his design tells a story.

Character I would marry: not interested in marriage whatsoever, so no one lol

Character I would be best friends with: No idea, realistically speaking, maybe Aizawa? We're both tired and powered by coffee lol

a random thought: bnha's writingis kinda bizarre to me, where it feels like the quality goes up and down depending on which characters are focused on. I also sometimes feel like seinen woulda been better genre for Horikoshi's story lol

An unpopular opinion: I'm not one to have those much? Maybe not liking Hawks is one lol

my canon OTP: is there even any?

Non-canon OTP: Shigadabi obviously

most badass character: ....I have to admit. AFO. He's so over the top evil its kinda impressive at this point. Like..."Dude what in the flying FUCK is wrong with you???" (At this point he feels more like an evil force of nature than 'just' a supervillain lol)

pairing I am not a fan of: Dabihawks

character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): lot of the female character writing isn't the best and very one note, tho its kinda typical for shonen so I wasn't exactly surprised

favourite friendship: canon? Mic & Aizawa, Tomura & Spinner. Non canon? Izuku & Tomura

character I want to adopt or be adopted by: I wanna adopt the entire league and kick AFO to the curb lol. If I have to pick just one tho...again, obviously little Tenko

003: (just realized a lot at the end will get a 'none' answers lol)

How I feel about this character: Tomura is such well written character, to the point he's one of the only things still keeping me reading the manga. Without him I'd probably lost interest ages ago due to how uninteresting I sometimes find the hero side writing....

All the people I ship romantically with this character: mainly just Dabi

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Brotp in other words? Canon, spinner, non canon, Izuku

My unpopular opinion about this character: I'm not really a person to have these like said? Maybe I feel like he's a little underrated, but that's all so subjective.....idk

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: On one hand, wish a good person had picked him up/AFO had actually been a good parent. On the other, this'd been a very different story, maybe for better, maybe worse, who knows

my het ship: none

my fem/slash ship: Shigadabi

my OTP: ....Shigadabi. wait am I understanding that previous one correctly?

my OT3: none

my crossover ship: I don't much care for crossovers like this? They always feel so awkward to me...(crossing over two fics in the same fandom is a different story, I'm talking about fandom crossovers specifically lol)

my kink: none

a headcanon fact: idk, I dont have anything specific almost ever lol

my gender bend: not my thing. Also tbh I don't quite understand the question?

link to the ask game below:

#Ask game #Answered anon #Bnha #shigaraki tomura

[janiedean]

I feel bad for all the nice J*nsa shippers who like their ship for whatever reasons (tropes, pretty art, aesthetic appeal, whatever) and know it's not canon but get associated with the misogynistic Dany hating crowd who act like Jon being attracted to Ygritte is J*nsa foreshadowing because red hair (I guess Jon should fuck Edmure Tully too? Omg give me Dark!Jon getting revenge on Catelyn by seducing her brother!) Tell me something. I'm new to the fandom but was J*nsa popular before the show? And I've heard something about the OG J*nsa shippers being alienated by the new shippers who insisted it had to be canon and acted like the series is called, "A song of J*nsa #danysux." I don't find that hard to believe because I know people who are now ashamed of calling themselves J*nsa shippers. Like, at this point, it's not only rival shippers who hate it. Even Gendrya/Braime/Jon stans/etc have started disliking that ship. You know your fandom is a problem when people who have nothing to do with Jnsa have a problem with it.

me: reads this ask

me: iwastheregandalf.gif which I can't find now but

okay anon buckle up because I am sadly well-equipped to answer this ask but before I do lemme tell you dark jon seducing edmure to take revenge on cat is LITERALLY THE BEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD but *clears throat* ALL RIGHT THEN.

disclaimer: as anon says I have no issue with like the shippers mentioned by anon in the beginning and ngl I agree, I have ABSOLUTELY ZERO FUCKING STAKES in the j*nsa vs j*nerys war and the only het jon ship I gaf about is jon/ygritte and we all know where that ended up I just... have been here since 2011/adwd was over and all the fic around was just for the books under secret lj communities and asoiaf qualified for yuletide and I have... seen... things.... and I actually have like uh had... beef... with some people in there and I know things bc ppl who hated those others told me stuff so anyway *sigh* buckle up anon I'mma tell you the story of jon shipwars through the years

in order, the old gods help me here, under the cut bc this is long as fuck

when I got into fandom also given what numbers were on ao3 one ship was popular and it was sansan. no like sansan was lit. the only asoiaf ship on ao3 with more than 200 fics. jb had twenty when i checked first. jc had like around 100-ish because of the show but sansan dwarfed anything. I posted the first jon/ygritte fic on the ao3 tag and the fourth throbb fic and like the others were all reposts from lj kinkmemes. nothing was popular before the show except for sansan when it comes to huge numbers bc grrm doesn't like fic and it was all hush hush until the show made it impossible to control and that ship was the one with a huge enough fanbase it actually had numbers, so like... j*nsa wasn't popular in the way nothing else was popular until it got screentime on the show

now, that stated, j*nsa had a... fair amount of fic for a rareship which was mostly book-based and from og shippers that were there from before the show and liked it for what it was but literally none of them thought it was gonna be canon, like it wasn't huge or anything but it had a small but dedicated fanbase who did their own thing and thought it was fun/liked the idea but that was it

that fandom had their own niche of hcs that they cultivated and shit except that like... at the end of S5/beginning of S6 there was a surge in shipping for... well obvious reasons bc it was obv sansa was getting to the wall and that would have been all nice and good but a) it was the time puritanical shipping was starting to take root and the 'shipping sansa with sandor or tyrion is hella problematic' rhetoric had started to circle coming from sans*ery shippers mostly but I'mma not open that fucking can of worms here, b) while the ending of S5 had more of a theon/sansa spike, the j*nsa stuff started getting big

now here we have to mention my villain origin story ie: j*nsa fandom had this one stan whose name I won't make because honestly it's been years and if she's still around I don't want her to remember I exist who was a bnf, wrote for... the website that created the whole larry/carol thing etc who was really fixed on this thing that j*nsa was actually canon and started writing extremely popular meta about it. now you're gonna ask how do you know, I know because this person once wrote a meta named 'why robb stark is a dick' and I told her that it was really fucking bad meta and she took it so badly she kept on trash talking me on her blog/her podcast (I was apparently the insane robb stark fangirl l m a o good lord) and like that was when some sane ppl who argued with her informed me in pvt that she was basically harping on the CANON thing when they'd have been okay with like... it being crackshipping and that she was basically cultivating a hoarde of followers who were harping on them/the ogs and basically ostracizing them;

I would like to add that this person - before her tumblr got 'accidentally deleted' and remade it therefore deleted most receipts for, er, her so-called meta which included stuff like ned and cat raised sansa as a sexual object and only wanted to sell her like cattle - had at some point started a round robin fic thing where... some of the characters mocked openly said stuff that some of the og fans had said specifically targeting them and people in that side basically went harassing anyone who didn't agree with that specific notion

now never mind that this person basically coined an entire term to describe ppl who liked white guys and excused all their wrongdoings out of my conversation re robb basically lying about everything I said as if I didn't have the receipts and tried to sell shirts with it and it didn't work and like then she got kicked out of her own website because she was telling her commenters disagreeing pretty shitty insults (considering I was called psychotic for disagreeing with her that time I don't doubt it) I think at some point she stepped back from fandom bc idk wtf she's up to these days and I don't want to, but basically at that point the dam was broken and there was a bunch of puritanical shippers harping on anyone who didn't agree with j*nsa is canon endgame stuff

this also includes an incident when those ppl were like... passing themselves as throbb shippers and ended up trying to tell t*hramsay shippers off the theon tag based on moral reasons and I ended up arguing with all of them (and they were all from that crowd) which in turn landed me in contact with other og j*nsa shippers who were like detached from that fandom bc those same people harassed them away as well ssooooo fun

anyway when S6 happened everyone was high on it and whatnot but I wasn't gonna begrudge them that I mean... you shipped it for years, canon is delivering you, good for you, but then j*nerys happened

god j*nerys happened

aaand basically...... I mean personally I was there like are y'all seriously arguing about the best incest jon ship out there but like basically the j*nsa endgame side was like AH JON IS PLAYING DANY SEE IF IT DOESN'T HAPPEN, the j*nerys obv got defensive af and both sides were sort of alternatively shitting on jon/ygritte anyway and depicting any other romantic rship jon could have as abusive™ and during S8 it just got worse and like I tried to stay out of it but basically from what I'm seeing now idk how the j*neryses are doing but on the j*nsa one it's ah jon's gonna play dany anyway and she's going to go insane like in the show so SHOW TRUTHING EVERY OTHER WAY and like again denying that sandor exists or that tyrion exists and like I barely touch my corner (sansan) but I ended up arguing with j*nsa/th*nsa people on twitter who were antis and is2g it was white-hair inducing and I know for sure the sansa/tyrion shippers were harassed to hell and back throughout so FUN

and even if the show didn't go there now since everyone there banked on the jnsa endgame thing and admitting you're wrong is like... not a thing, they still haven't let go of it and attach to that ship any shred of evidence which honestly is grasping at straws half of the time (like... the sansa/alysanne parallels like guys please no) and which is why every other ship is starting to get fed up, attaching canon proof of stuff from other ships onto theirs see that batb argument and jb is platonic but jonsa is not nvm taking all the sansan stuff and throwing it on j*nsa but then denying that sansan has canon evidence (like guys I had to read sansa touching his shoulder when saying gregor wasn't a true knight wasn't meaningful and we were seeing things please) and blah blah blah

this also goes hand in hand with the fixation on like... villanizing dany at all costs and like is2g I have zero investment in dany or her storyline I don't even remember it and I don't particularly care abt her either way and sure af I'm not for j*nerys endgame but like.... some stuff I read is completely excessive esp when fixing on how she's a completely mad tyrant who's gonna have to be put down and like... guys no

(also there's some srs stannis hate in that corner which I honestly don't get why they even care abt stannis but I had to read stuff like ppl don't recognize that dany and stannis are the real villains in this saga and like........ idek)

I think most of the og shippers are gone or don't ship it openly bc they don't want to be attached to the drama but like I also think they're pissing off everyone else bc like... I mean a bunch of them also were down with sansa being paired with other ppl as long as it meant a good ending for her except those ppl were... like everyone but the ppl she has actual contact with in canon which meant that at some point sansa/gendry was a thing and like.... you can imagine why arya/gendry shippers & arya stans were fed up, and there's also this tendency to behave like sansa is the center of the entire saga which like these books is named a song of jon snow basically can we pls make peace with it and personally I've had it with both j*nsa and j*nerys people since they started with that dumbass JON/YGRITTE WAS AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP rhetoric but I'm also fed up with the total ignoring that sandor exists/depicting us as delusional and honestly I also was by proxy fed up from the harassing of the sansa/tyrion shippers soooooooooooo

there were also instances of 'well theon is an acceptable choice other than jon bc he can't threaten her' which... i mean we all know what that meant and I'm not even commenting it bc it's one AM and I have no force to but I don't have to explain why it's not a progressive take now do I

there were also metas about how cousin incest being legal in half of the world means that jondany is a worse incest and j*nsa doesn't count as such and I was basically there like guys please just fucking own up to it but honestly I chose to forgot where I read that and I couldn't find the link if I tried

tldr: no one wants to admit that it's not gonna be endgame which considering the amount of fic they have on ao3 is imvho useless bc they have more content than like.. anything I ship that's not jb or that's actually like canon *cries in joncon/rhaegar but I mean renly/loras is canon and has less fic than them* so idk what's the problem with enjoying that instead of insisting it's gonna be canon when not even the show validated it while show truthing anyway when the only show truthing that can be truthed is the small council made of minorities and possibly jon eventually fucking off with the wildlings but not like that but like most people who thought it wasn't gonna be endgame had left/were made to leave by the time S7 rolled by and at this point since wow isn't out yet everyone is fandom-grasping at straws to find stuff to discourse on and we're here beating dead horses *shrug*

so that's... how it is but I would again like to point out that I don't judge ppl on their shipping, I don't particularly care about this entire feud bc I only ship jon with ppl he's not related to in whichever way and I try to stay out of this mess bc I don't really care to argue with ppl who have already decided to bend canon to whatever they want and will have to realize that it's not what grrm wrote at some point but like I have a very good memory and the above rant is as objective as possible also bc again I don't literally have a stake in that race I just think romantic/endgame j*nsa is not a thing and that ppl should stay in their lane and not harping on other ppl who ship whatever in general but especially when their ship is the most popular thing in fandom in the first place /two cents

#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #anonymous #ask post #anti-jonsa #anti jonsa #anti-jonerys #anti jonerys #both of them for equality

[jeonjk0504]

Hi! I admire your open minded responses and ethics. You have said in some posts that you believe Taehyung and Jungkook are mutually attracted to each other but that they haven't confessed or consummated. (Please correct me if I got it wrong!) I was wondering why, in your opinion, Taehyung and Jungkook wouldn't just take the leap and be together after being on a journey of so many years? Is it your opinion that homophobic society is holding them back? Is it the risks to the band? They seem like two rich, empowered men to me. Taehyung seems like a very honest and authentic person. And Jungkook tweeted a drawing he made of a famous line from Love Simon. These guys would know that being in a committed same sex relationship is an option, right? I am not saying they could necessarily be open about it but I find the idea of them wanting it but not acting on it challenging.

It is a sentiment that I see in a lot of cis het female dominated spaces that revolve around queer men, or the idea of queer men. It's love, it's attraction, it's everything but the relationship. And the sex. It strikes me as a heteronormative overlay on what queer men can and can't do, as if the relationship is allowed to be sexual and romantic only in y'all's minds. It looks like shipping but it also looks like erasure.

Personally, I do not think that Taekook are together but I could be wrong. Anything is possible. I admire the way you stand up for what is right and role model that it is never ok to be a bully. What people consider 'harmless' is relative. I don't buy any 'ships' in BTS as purely aesthetic relationships. I am a gay person and can't take away my identity while seeing this content. Hovering between the space of 'they are real' and 'I just want them to be real' is a safe space for bloggers to be. But it isn't a great representation of genuine LGBTQ+people. A 25 yr old and a 23 year old aren't nuns.

You don't have to answer this question if you prefer not to, of course. I didn't mean to try to make you defend your interests. Your points of view are as valid as mine.

Hey anon!

Thanks a lot for your interesting questions! :)

My personal feeling of them being mutually attracted to one another but not being in a relationship, stems from the dynamic they have. But i got to say, i‘m never 100% sure. I don‘t think you can tell at the tip of their noses if people are in a relationship, because it‘s mostly based on „what would i say/do/act like in a relationship?“ and that can never be copied onto people, even less if you don‘t know them personally.

What makes me say that though is a mixture of reasons. The biggest of them is simple: their friendship. My personal impression is often, that they feel drawn to each other but they also have a good eye on their responsibilities and possibilities. This is less of something i can „prove“, it‘s simply a feeling i get based on various situations and how i see them act, none in specific. I also imagine to cross the line of friendship, might be a lot harder in a conservative country while being in this wide reaching spotlight in contrast to other spaces. And all the other things you took as an example, can add to that they don‘t have to though (the popularity, the band, the family, …).

Also when i say i get the impression it‘s unspoken, i refer to them talking about that attraction or establishing a mature understanding, i have never said they haven‘t acted on it. Their body language feels like they have, actually. To me at least.

I know they both support LGBTQIA Artists and Art. But supporting it and identifying with it are two different pair of shoes.

And while Taehyung seems very, let‘s say adventurous to me, he has always had a strong affinity to a self-image based on his father. Which might mean you can indulge in something for fun (same sex intimacy) but when it get’s serious (same sex relationships) it‘s better to follow conservative ideals, like a lot of oppressed or erased homosexuals in Homophobic countries do.

This is just a connection i keep thinking about though, not a fact. It‘s only a fact that he views his dad as a role-model, visually and also in the role that he performs. His strong wish for children supports that as well. And i‘m not saying it‘s impossible for same sex couples to start a family with children (at least not where i come from) but in SK it‘s sadly not an option as of now. They‘re neither allowed to marry, nor have a legal partnership which will definitely have an impact on how you approach relationships in any case.

And i keep questioning myself: would you share such a sensitive wish like having kids, knowing fully well that it‘s not an option while being in a serious same sex relationship? Or would you share it in the belief that laws will change in the future or you will („somehow“) end up with a woman to make it happen? It may be nitpicky of me to question that, but i see it as a possible indicator of Taehyung not being in a serious same sex relationship as of now, because i feel like his desire to have children in some way, has always been noticeably strong and if he shares his wishes in such a carefree way, maybe his wish is in no danger.

Btw i know a lot of TKer i talk to disagree with me on this and they don‘t think it has to mean anything! 😌 and to be fair: we have the same amount of possible indicators that speak in favor of a relationship. I feel like i‘m talking a lot about why i think they‘re not, rather in what way they could actually be… (very ironic, looking at my blog)

Jungkook on the other hand is a little romantic to me, but he seems very careful too not like someone who just takes the leap (i‘m not saying shy, pretty sure he got over that a few years ago for the most part..).

There is a lot more, but it would take up too much space to elaborate so i hope it‘s okay i only gave a small reason for now.

Concerning your criticism on cishet spaces, they are of course valid and it‘s important to keep an eye on that and call out people who hurt the community. I don‘t feel comfortable with you associating me in that space though, because i doubt you actually know from what perspective i am sharing my opinions. I also use BTS neither for hetero nor LGBTQIA representation because i don‘t know what they identify as. It goes both ways. You might see it as hovering in a safe space, but for me that safe space is mostly there out of respect, not because i don‘t feel brave enough to take a stance.

I thank you for your respectful questions! :) it was interesting to reflect on why i view them the way i do. Please always feel free to share your opinions with me 🥰 have a nice day!!

#ask mo #mo replies #taekook #vkook #kookv #kooktae #taeguk

[scorpionwins]

hey!! sorry for the totally random ask but i raided ur writing tag and omg we like a lot of the same tropes. out of curiosity what are some tropes you dont like all that much??

Omg hiiii jsjs don't apologize i fucking LOVE random asks

To answer your question, - it totally depends for who exactly I'm writing (or what ships I should say.) Some characters, in my eyes, fit certain tropes and some just don't (for me).

That being said,

Love/Hate. Not the biggest fan really? I understand it can be nice to have that spice of tension in your ship, especially if they start off on the wrong foot, but. Meh. Not for me. ☆☆

(Positive points): This trope can be challenging and fun , if done correctly. Writers who gravitate towards it pull out very nice complexity in terms of both characterization and relationship dynamics)

Dub/Non-Con. Hard no. -☆.

(Alternatively: If dubious consent is used in the context of playfulness, (exemple: Person A wanting to stay in bed all day and not letting Person B get up because they're Person's A personal teddy bear) then I think it can be fine.)

Slow burn. Nothing wrong with this trope, I just don't have the patience lmao, ☆☆☆

(Positive points): I've read some beautifully written works involving slow burn but like I mentioned previously, it depends on the ship. This trope can be amazing if you like exploration, details, and the satisfaction of something coming full circle.)

Serial Killers AUs. Uhh, find them a bit inappropriate? I honestly don't see the appeal. ☆

(Alternative: If you like darker romances and morally grey characters, then! As long as nothing is glamorized I don't have a problem with it, but still not for me.)

Hate sex. Mmmm. I'm sappy so it makes me sad really? There's nothing much to add really, that's the only reason. But depends on the ship. ☆☆

(Positive points : Interesting exploration of hurt and resentment and love coming together if you're into that.)

Consensual/Non-Consenual infidelity/Cheating. Not really my thing. ☆

(Positive points: If your ship is on the adventurous side, this can show they're confidence and trust. (PS, OP doesn't mind open relationships, nor is this meant to put them down, if its clear you're all on the same page. It's your relationship, do what you want.)

I hate my husband/boyfriend. This is something I specifically see with het ships and it can be very upsetting sometimes, especially when the fandom particularly sees it as cute, or empowering for a female character to mistreat her partner. Like? Being attracted to men isn't an embarrassment or a crime, and hating them isn't the feminist movement you think it is. -☆☆☆☆☆

(Positive points: None, this shit straight up doesn't slap.)

I'm embarrassed of liking/loving my spouse. Like? Why? If you aren't in love with your partner for who they are why are you with them? It's just not a trope I understand or enjoy particularly much. ☆

(Positive points: Usually, this trope is used humorously and is more of an endearing annoyance than anything and it makes me fond sometimes. It doesn't bother me but doesn't delight me. And if you enjoy it unironacally then uhh. Get a hug?)

Hard Angst/Torture porn: I really don't mind it, but I can't consume it all the time. When I do, its delightful! Honestly depends on my mood. ☆☆☆

(Positive points: If you need a good cry this is it. It also depends on all having a satisfying ending as opposed to just sadness/torture porn.)

#this was so cool!! #ask #tropes #fanfiction #fanfic tropes

[c-atm]

'Ohhh man, how did it come to this?" 

This was the thought of one Steven Quartz Universe. Currently, waiting on the roof of his school for one Connie Sachini Maheswaran. 

"This is so nerve-wracking!" He thought out loud as he paced in a circle and folded in front of his chest. "Why did I come here? Why did I not just leave? Oh, right, I asked her to come here!... WHY DID I ASK HER TO COME HERE?!" He yelled, scratching his head wildly. Before breathing calmly and deeply. "Don't lose focus; remember what you came here to do." He said to himself as he clenched his fist to center himself. He came with a motive.

That motive was Connie Maheswaran, and unraveling the enigma that was Connie Maheswaran. 

For some reason, beyond his knowledge, Connie was a delinquent of sorts. She didn't follow the dress code, always finding her way into a fight( which she hadn't lost one yet); she was a bit alarming to be around as well. The rumors of her snapping at a teacher were infamous, and many. She was also a bit of a bully...at least towards him. Nothing wrong or harmful, just...

"She's so damn stressful." He shouted to the blue sky.

There were other things as well that made him want to keep an eye on her. For one thing, her grades. 

While he was the top student in his class, Connie was one of the top students...In the city. She was quite the athlete and had her hand in martial arts, fencing, and tennis. 

Just this past weekend, he found out she was musically talented with the violin. He happened to spot her while walking around their city and caught her playing on the streets with some other performers collecting money, which she took none of. 

Being a savant when it comes to music himself, he could tell when someone was in love with their craft, and the melody that she produced sent shivers down his spine. From quick and powerful hip-hop to slow sensual and slow R&B to wild and rebellious rap and rock, to things he never heard before. The impromptu concert was something extraordinary. And so far from the 'Connie' in school, it's hard to imagine them as the same person, but there was no way it was anyone else but her.

"Not with those prideful black eyes." Steven started scratching his head, "where is she!?"

"Hehehe-hmm-hmm!"

Steven froze; he knew that snicker. He turned to the roof entrance to see her laying on her left side on top of the roof entrance, smirking at him with her cheek in hand.

"How long have you been there?"

"Enough to see everything." She teased, " the pacing, the head-scratching, the proclamations, and everything in between." She chuckled, seeing his nervous face. The way his lips formed a straight line, the slightly puffed cheeks, and those brown eyes that seemed to shrink just a bit, and the slight cold sweat from his head. 

'So cute, always so fun to play with.' She mused, "I was beginning to think you wouldn't show, had me waiting for quite a bit, you know." 

He blushed in embarrassment as he looked at his watch read 3:00, "sorry, had student council work. Still, 15 minutes late isn't that bad."

"I've been here since 1 p.m. Two hours spent  waiting for you." 

"I apologize for the Waitaminuet." Steven pointed at her accordingly, "You skipped afternoon classes...Again!"

"One was self-study... The other two." She paused, trying to think of a good excuse, her face cutely scrunching up. "Yeah, I skipped them." She admitted with a shrug.

Steven groaned, ready to comment, but stopped his thought as he looked closely at her, more so her legs.

So much of it was being shown from her hiked upskirt, and it didn't help hide her curves either. The loose-fitting, two-thirds button blouse and tie combo weren't better. "Come down here, so I can fix your uniform...Again!" The president barked at the smirking delinquent.

"You sure you want me to do that? You might get a glimpse of my delicates", Connie gave a faux gasp before reaching for the hem of her skirt, "of course, if that's what this is all about-." She peeled the cloth back, letting a bit of thigh show, "Guess I can show you."

"Oh, re- I mean...No, no! " Steven screamed, turning around blushing, "come down. I won't watch."

She grinned as she tipped herself over the edge, landing silently on her feet in a crouch. Seeing that he still didn't realize she was on the ground, she slowly sneaked to him, not too close. Close enough to bend over by her waist, her lips pursed by his ear.

"Fwoooooooh!"

"Ahh!" Steven screamed as he leaped from Connie's whistle. He turned with an annoyed glare at the taller girl, a corner pout on his lips as she continued to grin mischievously.

"Hello, Pres." She chirped as if she didn't scare him out of his skin.

"Connie," Steven said with a growl. Usually, it would be 'Miss Maheswaran,' but today, purpose takes precedence over professionalism.

"Wow, 'Connie' off the back and so casual too. This must be more serious than I thought." She tittered a bit mockingly, her fingers upon her lip.

"It is for me." Steven sighed as he looked at her clothes. 

The sunflower pleated skirt hiked up to just below her navel, making it look 'dangerously' short; the short sleeve white blouse unbuttoned just enough to show a bit of her sports bra for the day(pink with a star), the pink bow tie which hung more like a chain and cascaded over her breast, and the blue blazer which was two sizes too big and she wore almost like a cape. The only regulation was the navy thigh highs with red and blue sneakers and her hairstyle, a loose mid-back flow of black with a sword clip in the perfect center.

"Drink it all in, Pres." She raised her arms behind her head and slightly arched her back, giving him a flirty pose, her teasing grin ever-present. " I know you like to watch."

"DO-DO YOU EVEN HAVE ANY IDEA HOW THAT CAN BE TAKEN?!" He screeched and face cherry red.

"Given the current circumstances," she placed a few fingertips on her chin, looking upward before pointing at him, "you're attentive of your fellow schoolmates." She offered him a thumbs up and a wink. "Good job, Pres! Way to stay charmingly diligent." She laughed boisterously.

He scoffed a laugh, "I appreciate the praise, but is it true, I wonder." He sighed as he began what was almost ritual for the two of them. "Here I got a fellow schoolmate who's a little wayward and wild." He started by buttoning up her shirt," She gets into fights, she skips classes, she dresses messy and revealing," He buttoned her collar button before moving to the tie. "And she seems to love surging my blood pressure."

"Well, you do make a cute cherry, Pres." Connie countered with a grin.

"She also never takes anything seriously." He breathed in slight annoyance, "or at least, that's what it seems."

"Hmm, Is that so?"

"Yes, you see. I have seen evidence of the contrary." He undid her tie altogether before throwing the cloth over her shoulders. "Attire excluded." He let out a little smirk at his joke." I just want to know why there's such a disconnect between her school persona and the one I've seen." He implored as he tied the diamond-point bow around her neck neatly. 

Connie didn't respond as he adjusted her skirt to just above her knees, as school allowed.

"Maybe, there isn't."

Steven looked up at het to see her looking down at him with a neutral countenance. 

"Wha-"

"There isn't a disconnect." She sighed as she took a step back and then passed him towards the railing. "Do you think I come from a broken home? I don't." She hiked back up her skirt, "my Am'mā is a doctor, my Tantai is a private security guard. Both heads of their fields and currently working in Delmarva, leaving me in our nice modest brownstone." She playfully sniffs.

"You must miss them,"  Steven whispered.

"Somewhat? Not the first time." She shrugged, "plus, kind of hard to miss them. They make sure to have video chats with use every morning and evening." She chuckles, "Dad, even try to synchronize our meals, so we eat the same thing." She shook her head, smiling. 

"Sounds nice."

"Not a dream, but I'm loved and allowed independence." She stretched out the tie letting it hang at her breast as she leaned at the rail. "What about you, Pres? What made you such a hardass for rules and regulations."

"I'm not a hardass." Steven rubbed his nape, looking away as she undid her buttons as they were before. "Do I come off like one?"

She side nodded, waving her hand, "Just a bit."

"Argh." He shook his head, "wait, this isn't about me-"

"Hold on now." Connie raised her hand, "you can't just ask a question and not expect to be interrogated yourself." 

"I'm not interrogating you." Steven countered, "I just... "

"What?" She offered.

"Wanna know why!?"  He barked, "Why you act so differently in school and outside of it. Why someone with your intelligence, athleticism, talent, and allure…" He sighed, "act so lackadaisical, rebellious, and aloof." 

"Why do you care so much?" She inquired, looking upward, "

"Just...I don't know." He admitted, "it's your so questioning?"

"A lot of people act differently from business than they are in their personal life." Connie looked at him with an arched eyebrow before sighing. "Do you act the same at home as you do here?"

"Well.."

"Outside of watching me with those chocolate browns of yours, that is."

Steven eyes widen at the teasing, flirty tone of her voice. He felt a shiver down his spine when her face adopted the style.

Those long black eyebrows were dipping down over half-lidded raven eyes that twinkled in the afternoon light with soft, slightly parted, puckered lips and the slightest cherrywood blush on her brown cheeks. "You thought I wouldn't know when my favorite browns were watching me play violin on Saturday." 

"I-"

She teased as she walked up to Steven, making him red in the face as he turned away.

*Chu*

Steven turned his eyes towards her as he backed up just a little, his hand on his right cheek, trying to fight the small smirk.

"Usually, you would act much more abrasive when I kiss your cheek, Pres." she grinned, "could you actually be resilient to my charms...or maybe you're crushing on me?" She laughed in slight play.

"Why did...No," Steven clenched his fist as a scrowl came to his lips." do you always do that? Make it so hard to have a conversation with you, Connie?"

"A conversation? On what?" She folded her arms over her stomach, "on how my clothes are wrong? On how I should be more courteous to substitute teachers and not skip those classes, despite them being nothing more than extra study-halls. How I should be more forthcoming." She glared, "you don't wanna conversation, you wanna lecture." Her glare softened, "you wanna guide and help someone you think need it, and as honorable and even attractive as I find it...I don't need it. I'm not begging for attention or a lost lamb or your new pet project or whatever. "  She sighed, looking away, "I'm just who I am, and that's all I can be."

Steven rubbed the back of his head, "I know." He kissed his teeth, "I wasn't...I didn't call you up here to lecture you."

"Hmmph!"

"I swear, I didn't." He at her eyes, realizing the small moisture in them. "I really just wanted to talk."

"Yeah," She blinked a few times. "Another round of complaints, again."

"No!" Steven shouted making her jump and turn to him. He rubbed his cheek, "Sorry?"

"You're nervous."She noted with a small smile, "You scratch your left cheek when you're nervous."

"Um.." He put his hand down, only to instinctively continue scratching.

"You're reactions are so cute, Pres." She chuckled behind a fist.

"Come on; this is what I'm talking about." He muttered, "can't even tell you that I want to get to know you without being teased." He blabbed involuntarily. 

Connie felt her voice lock in her throat as her cheeks burned under her skin. "What?" 

"I want to get to know you." Steven implored nonchalantly before the implications hit him. "I mean…Um.." 

The two looked at each other with not so different eyes. Both were feeling a bashful warmness in their chest, one that rendered them too afraid to speak but urged to be anything but silent.

"I'm interested...in you, " Steven admitted to Connie and himself. "In knowing you...I mean... Outside of school." He finished, scratching his cheek.

"Just outside school?" She sighed, ignoring the warmth in her chest, as she pressed her palm to her cheek. Trying to get a rise out of him.

*Chu*

"Steven?" Connie's voice broke as she felt his lips on her other cheek. "That..you…"

"An answer to your question!" He implored, quickly, "I'm interested in you… all of you." He  announced, "That's ok, right?"

Connie wanted to tease him on his change of words, but with his hand out toward her, basically asking her to grasp it. She came to realize it wasn't a fumble of words at all. 

"Mmmhmm." She muttered, taking his hand. 

The two giggled at the feel of their warm palms. "Um...Can I walk you home, talk to you on the way?"  

The (seemingly) genius delinquent nodded at the hardworking president. "Already trying to learn about me, Pres. .Steven."

"Well," he gave her a flirty grin as he leads her to the stairs, "you did say my diligence was charming." 

"Yeah." She involuntarily squeezes his hand, "it is." She breathed out, closing the door behind them, ending one chapter of a rivalry and opening a book of friendship, love, and more.

#steven universe #connie maheswaran #connverse #steven universe future #steven universe fanfiction #steven and connie #older steven #older connie #connverse fanfic #facememe

[freedom-of-fanfic]

I need your help friend, the fandom is at stake: can you do a quick recap of why shipping isn't activism? And I don't mean just in terms of antis, but also the anti-backlash where people defend their ships by trying to prove they're actually progressive (which would still imply you need to prove your ship is not harmful before shipping it). Fans may have good intentions and mean no harm, but social justice is not achieved through fantasy.

what a good question. let me see if I can do this justice with a good answer.

Why Shipping is Not Activism

(edited on August 6th, 2018, 1 year after initial writing)

First off: let’s define ‘shipping’ as ‘desiring two characters to have romantic and/or sexual interactions and using social media or fanworks to share this desire with others.’  So: specifically looking at shipping as a social activity here, because I hope we can all agree that ‘shipping it’ - simply wishing for two characters to have some kind of interaction in your head - is not activism because it’s thoughts, which on their own nobody else knows about and thus can’t have an impact.

Shipping as activism is mainly talked about in the context of being ‘queer/LGBT representation’, and everything else is treated as secondary.*  So I’ll be talking about this primarily from that POV.

Okay.

shipping is not activism because shipping doesn’t do two important things that activism does: 

shipping does not generate or act as mainstream representation

shipping does not increase awareness or change social values

and that’s okay. Shipping doesn’t need to do these things because shipping takes place in a microcosm. Fandom is but a tiny, tiny fraction of internet and social activity as a whole. No matter how ‘progressive’ we collectively are, only in the rarest cases will we make a meaningful impact on society as a whole.

Shipping serves a different, but no less important purpose, which I’ll get into below.

That’s the short version. the long version is below.

Shipping is not activism because: 

Shipping is a fandom-specific activity and fandom doesn’t make much of a social impact. We get talked about a lot by the creators because we’re the people most likely to have contact with them and provide feedback on their content; we have an impact on creators in that sense.  But apart from coming to cons and talking on social media, when we get mainstream attention it’s almost always to talk about how weird we are. Also, we don’t cause social change. We can fan over something that already exists, but we can’t cause a show with better representation to be created.

Because of this: 

Meaningful, mainstream representation of LGBT/queer relationships come from mainstream media, and fandom is not the main force acting on mainstream media productions.  Remember when korrasami became canon in the last few minutes of the last episode of Korra because the creators knew about the shippers? Congratulations: you’re looking at an outlier that took a lot of very specific circumstances and luck to have happen. And most importantly: it wasn’t done to please the shippers.  Shippers may have given them the idea, but it was done because canon korrasami would create visible bisexual/LGBT representation. It was possible because the show was only airing online, to a smaller audience, and because of the herculean efforts of LGBT/queer activists over the last century to get our collective visibility and acceptability as high as it is (and yes, we have a long way to go, but we’re miles past where we were even 10 years ago.)

Current fandom seems to carry the belief that if we just ship hard enough and loud enough, the creators of an ongoing mainstream media will reward us by making our favorite ship canon.** The reality is we rarely, if ever, make a meaningful impact on the direction that canon takes. We’re a small, small part of the consumer base - a loud one, but small!  We’re often not the aimed-at demographic, either, so pleasing us is the last thing the execs trying to make a buck are thinking about. The material we’re fanning over is already old news to producers; short canons are usually already finished by the time we receive it, and longer ones are at least a season ahead in production time. (If we do make an impact, we won’t see it for at least a year or more.)  Shows must meet decency standards, and LGBT/queer relationships are still seen as higher-rated than their cishet counterparts.  Executives care about what will sell ad space or toys more than what fandom wants.

The fact of the matter is we have the cause and effect backwards.

Ships being ‘good representation’ is a function of increased mainstream media representation of marginalized identities, not the other way around.  When media was entirely full of characters who were white cis men, we shipped white cis men. And as media slowly stops having nothing but white cis men, we’re … still shipping white cis men a lot, because there’s still a lot of them and there’s still a societal bias that tells us that white cis men are the most important/interesting people (and simultaneously, because they are unmarked, we can’t accidentally fall into stereotype pits while fanning them), but we’re shipping more and more non-white, non-cis, non-male characters too. 

Real social activism leads to increased media representation - like the reclaiming of the word ‘queer’ in the late 80′s/early 90′s leading to a TV show called ‘Queer as Folk’ and featuring gay characters. And increased media representation leads to more marginalized characters for fandom to ship.

While transformative fandom does, to an extent, change things from canon to represent ourselves more - or just to suit our fancy! - canon always reigns supreme and is the most widespread version of the characters.  Canon becoming more diverse will always have more of an effect on fandom than fandom being diverse/having diverse content will ever have on canon.

Besides:

The desire to see ships become canon is not primarily motivated by generating healthy representation of marginalized identities.  Fans have been wanting their favorite ships to become canon since the Stone Ages.  The Harry Potter fandom wars were all about what was most canon: Harry/Hermione, Hermione/Ron, or Harry/Ginny.  Notably: Draco/Harry is not one of the pairings I list, because nobody thought there was the remotest chance that Draco/Harry would ever become canon.  It’s only recently that LGBT/queer rep in particular has been making a meaningful appearance in mainstream media, and suddenly slash ships have entered the ‘will it be canon!?’ fray. And some mlm fans feel they have more ‘right’ to canon because mlm ships are LGBT/queer rep.

Here’s the thing: if this was really about representation, then we’d all be celebrating if any mlm pairing became canon. No matter which pairing is ‘more progressive’, any LGBT/queer canon representation is better than none. But (surprise!) it’s not; the ‘queer rep!’ battle cry is just an additional cannonball in the arsenal of ongoing ship wars.*** And I venture to say that most mlm shippers engaged in a ship war would rather see an unrelated het pairing become canon than their rival mlm ship.

And this is because: 

Shipping is not, and never has been, primarily about creating healthy marginalized representation.  

Don’t get me wrong: transformative fandom is heavily LGBT/queer/mentally ill/disabled/otherwise underrepresented, and we often create transformative fanworks that bring our identities into the story. That’s awesome self-fulfillment, and it can really bless and excite fellow fans who see fandom content that makes them feel more welcomed and recognized.  However.

Generating marginalized representation isn’t the primary motive for shipping. We ship out of love. We see the dynamics between two characters and think ‘oh, that’s hot’ or ‘I’d like to see more of that’. We ship for fun. We ship because we think two characters would look good together. We ship because we imagine ourselves as one character and have a crush on the other. We ship things for many, many reasons, many I haven’t mentioned here, maybe as many reasons as there are people in fandom doing shippy things.  And to that end, I’m sure that some people do decide what to ship purely because they believe it represents minority groups that need representation - but it would be too much to say that’s the main reason people ship things.

Shipping doesn’t need to be about creating healthy marginalized representation because:

Fiction is not reality; a person can ship the ‘right’ ships and still be a bigot IRL. and visa versa. Because we interact with fiction and reality in different ways, there are people who really love mlm ships but still think gay marriage is icky. On the other hand, a person can be the loudest activist for LGBT/queer causes in real life and only ship het ships in fandom, just because the dynamics of het ships pings their fancy more.

Shipping as activism preaches to the choir. Shipping being a fandom-specific activity, and many of us being oppressed ourselves, shipping the ‘right’ ship to increase awareness in the microcosm of fandom isn’t really accomplishing anything. Most of us are ourselves LGBT/queer, or friends with people who are LGBT/queer. Most of us are aware of how much pain the lack of representation in mainstream media brings on.  And most of us are sensitive to the fact that we’re not the only oppressed person in fandom space and are willing to learn more about how we can help other oppressed people.

If I could sum up the problems of current fandom, it’s that we assume that nobody else is #woke (even though most of us are sufferers). 

In that sense, shipping the ‘right’ ship doesn’t bring more awareness; it acts as a signal to others that you have awareness, and hopefully protects you from being erased or harassed as an ignorant asshole (’cishet’).

Most importantly:

Shipping isn’t activism, but it does something else great: it lets marginalized fans express and indulge themselves in any way that pleases them.  

- fandom is hugely made of underrepresented minorities, so shipping is a way that we express ourselves and relate to one another - whether those ships are ‘progressive’ or not. So, so many of us deal with social stigma or harassment or hate in our real lives; we consume media to get away from that, and we indulge in fandom to get away from that.  

Most of us are, just by existing and demanding space in the world, activists for the rights of the marginalized and oppressed. 

I’ve had some people disagree with me on this, but I stand by it. many people in fandom have orientations/identities/nd/etc that politicize our existence. When we are ‘out’ - when we are visible - and vocally demanding recognition for our lives by being visible and refusing to compromise, we are activists by existence. And many of us are allies, taking political action on behalf of others. and many of us are both - marginalized this way, allies to people marginalized that way. 

the actions we take as activists in the real world are the ones that matter - not fandom.

Fandom is a space for us to play with each other and connect over something fun and pleasant, and those fun and pleasant things don’t have to be activist things. We’re allowed to take a break.

The importance of activism and representation is to benefit the marginalized and oppressed, letting us be recognized and less stigmatized, and deconstructing the social and political structures that work against us leading fulfilling lives.  When we use shipping the ‘right’ ship as a bludgeon to attack one another, we are literally defeating the purpose of our own causes. We’re stigmatizing each other for our fandom interests. And we’re certainly not deconstructing any social structures that harm us!

In conclusion: The way we can be most activist in transformative fandom is, no joke, to care more about the fact that almost everyone else here is marginalized too than that one another’s ships aren’t marginalized enough.

fandom is different from the way it used to be: it’s more visible, more mixed with non-fandom, and easier to access. certainly, it’s important to make clear where we’re addressing relationship stuff for fandom versus relationship stuff for real life. there’s value in taking steps to counteract the harm done by lack of education about sex, consent, and healthy relationships, particularly as LGBT+/queer people, or people who need access to & information about reproductive health care taking care of one another in a world that doesn’t care enough about us. 

but educating each other doesn’t happen through a ship: it happens through open, friendly communication. shipping can open the door to communication, but it can’t substitute for straightforward honesty. 

Let’s foster healthy interaction and honest communication wherever we can: by celebrating each other and our creative endeavors - instead of creatively locking us down with terror of getting erased or driven out of fandom by demanding everything be treated as a teaching opportunity.

be kind to one another. 

(the rest of the world is not going to do it for us.)

–

*In talking about ships as representation we generally start with ‘this ship is queer/LGBT’ and then use all other axes of oppression to prove which ship is ‘more progressive’, i.e. - F1nnPoe and Ky1ux are both mlm, but F1nnPoe is more pure because it’s a black man and a Latino man as opposed to two white men. (Occasionally race will also be talked of as the primary point of value, depending on the fandom.)

**On a side note, this whole paragraph is also why it’s unlikely that fandom being ugly will ever cause a show to be cancelled or a pairing will get changed in canon because some fans were nastier than others. We’re like bugs with stingers: scary and painful but ultimately not that impactful (unless you’re allergic, I guess, but forget that part of the metaphor). 

***This is part of where the ‘I have to prove my ship is wholesome/their ship is evil’ stuff comes from: ‘proving’ to creators that your ship is the ‘better’ queer representation because it either covers more marginalized bases or is ‘more pure’, making it less objectionable for mainstream representation. (the joke is that bigots don’t care how pure an LGBT/queer ship is: they’re gonna still think it’s awful because it’s LGBT/queer.)

PS - I don’t think this answer really addresses why arguing about purity of ships is a bad plan, but this is already so long that I’ll address that somewhere else I think.

#shipping is not activism #in defense of shipping #queer representation #this is an americentric post #in defense of freedom to fandom #*chanting* SHIP WAR SHIP WAR SHIP WAR