#and idk she thinks it might be fr fr this time

[taasgirl]

lover - oscar piastri

summary: y/n is a songwriter who writes plenty of songs however no one realizes that they're made by her (and about oscar hehe)!

a/n: the outcomes of the races are fictional, and the order in which these songs have been written (assume fearless was written this year ygwim?). also no face claim!!

liked by yukitsunoda, oscarpiastri, and 33, 287 others ynusername romance is not dead if you keep it just yours! lovelovelove being able to come home for race day!! i'm so proud of u osc 🩷

oscarpiastri I'm so lucky 🥰 liked by ynusername

user27633 Y/N IS A SWIFTIE CONFIRMED!?!?!

ynusername of course!!

user16372 u literally take the cutest photos of oscar

user82537 y/n quoting paris... i'm so up

yukitsunoda 😆😆

landonorris You're my favourite wag

ynusername wow how considerate

liked by taylorswift, landonorris, and 1, 287, 387 others oscarpiastri Unwinding before Japan 👊

ynusername tehee we're cute

oscarpiastri You're cuter landonorris Get a room

taylorswift ooooh she's working hard @ ynusername

user62584 WHAT THE FUCK ARE U DOING HERE???

user98274 OSCAR IS FRIENDS WITH TAYLOR HUH

user61192 i did not expect to see taylor in the comments of oscar's post tagging y/n!

user92898 no fr like what is going on

user93829 Everyone shut up about taylor look at the beauty that is y/n omd

view ynusername's story...

liked by jackantonoff, phoebebridgers, and 55, 918, 278 others taylorswift In honour of my album 'The Tortured Poets Department' release a week ago, I wanted to thank my biggest musical inspirations! Thank you Jack, Lana, and Y/N for helping me the best artist I could possibly be, without you'd guys I'd be nowhere (thank you y/n for writing the cheesiest, cutest, sexiest songs ever)!!

user51862 who is y/n

user01827 She's dating f1 driver oscar piastri but also now apparently a songwriter idk...

user72973 Wdym thanks y/n for writing?? you're telling me the twitter stans were right??

user62863 y/n is singlehandedly uniting f1 and the swifties

ynusername thank u tay 💓💓

user52868 Girl has been living a double life

user51929 ohhh so this is why taylor was commenting on oscar's post😭

liked by oscarpiastri, taylorswift, and 108, 276 others ynusername well now that the cat is out of the bag, who wants to hear a story? i assume u all said yes.

on one of our first dates, oscar made me a bracelet (yes that one) and i thought (and still think) that it was one of the most romantic gestures. so obviouslyyy i wrote 'lover' about him hehe. yes we only knew each other for at most three months when i wrote it, but i love him so much, he's my forever.

oscarpiastri I love having a singer for a girlfriend (wife one day)

ynusername hello cat boy

user18739 You're telling me that taylor's most romantic song is literally written by my favourite wag about my favourite driver?? i might pass out

ynusername haha yes! i write a lot of songs for tay

landonorris So this song is basically about ur delusions liked by ynusername

user52863 oh now i need to know exactly what songs you've written

user20939 AND PLEASE RECORD COVERS OF THEM TOO

lilymhe wait so you've been friends with taylor the whole time...

lilymhe AND THE SONG THAT I WANT PLAYED AT MY WEDDING IS WRITTEN ABOUT OSCAR?? ynusername oh my god lily HAHA

let me know if you liked this!! i know it's super short but i'm seriously lacking inspo and ideas omd. also i literally love oscar so much.

i'm also working on a few reqs, so if you have a suggestion or request, let me know because i'd love to do it!!

#oscar piastri #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri x you #oscar piastri imagine #oscar piastri fanfic #oscar piastri fluff #oscar piastri smau #op81 #op81 x reader #op81 imagine #op81 fluff #op81 fic #formula 1 x you #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 fic #formula 1 #formula one #formula 1 x y/n #formula 1 x oc #formula one x reader #formula one imagine #formula one x you #formula one x y/n #formula one x oc #mclaren #mclaren f1 #f1 #f1 x reader

[oatbugs]

oh my god u rly are everyone you've ever loved !! for better or worse !! a part of you becomes them!

#i had a moment of lucidity idk im in this café the person i went on a few dates w is coming to see me i said come study w me #and they said okay immediately even though im a town over and i dont like them i really dont feel even a little attracted to them that way #but i did let them bite my neck a week ago and it still hurts i let them hold my hand i just #i never start anything #i let them kiss me. why do i do that? i dont feel anything towards them #and i told them ill probably never sleep with them and i thought thats enough but it really isnt is it #they write poetry about people they meet even once #theyre coming a whole town over to study w me but its not a date i feel nothing towards them romantically and i dont want to lose them as #a friend. this was her line of thinking wasnt it? i would take the train and meet her near her place in ldn and wed study together and #shed let me hold her and she would never initiate much and we were just studying together and it wasnt a date #like . fuck. i dont want to do what she djd to me to another person ever #their shared location map went offline at london bridge like ok theyre in the underground they are fr coming a whole town over #its a short distance but the point is i think i should have taken what my friend said more seriously . she told me i was kinda leading #them on bc what i thought to be just meetups dates might entail more for them #anyway im gonna be clear w them this time maybe #....IT JUST NEVER COMES UP IS THE THING #do i have to clarify even if it never comes up #i do in fact hear myself #ok #the parallels r lining up #aaa

[mattodore]

pretty girl (who has clawed her way through multiple chest cavities)

#river dipping #delphi sol #lykos #ts4 #ts4 edit #ts4 cas #simblr #she's so cute i remember i intentionally gave her sharper angles when i was messing w/ her last year #but when i did her over last month i just made her rounder again so like. what was the point of that exactly lmao #i'm gonna edit ria jussst a little then fix imani's eyes #i still have an absolute MESS in my library like so many saves i have to go through and delete i'm fr a pack rat in my saves library #but anyway i'm just gonna tweak some faces #my wrists are hurting so i should probably sit down and just watch red dwarf after... #mattodore might start calling to me tho idk #ALSO... added magic bloom to my cas preset :3c have i tested it with matthias yet? ...................no. #palest man aliveeeee he ruins bloom for me all the time like i think bloom can look sooo pretty but i can't even use it like i want </3 #i'll probably have to toss it but it looks pretty to me rn

[cryptiduni]

…i just saw this poll and my unevolved brain gel wriggled inside my cranium like a feral fish:

idk how you look at his official art and call him conventionally attractive. my man looks like a wet dog and has eyebags for daysss. face full of pox scars, skin pale af, and those shaggy ass hair & a rugged beard hanging from his flat long face.

he is pretty *to me* but like dude???

—not exactly a heartthrob boy band material is he?

obv I wouldn’t call him “misunderstood baby uwu” if we are talking a little more seriously —but to be fair jean is having possibly the worst week of his life. the car? fucking sunk. case? unsolved. not to mention his close partner (who is also an ass mind you) doesn’t even remember him, already running around with a new one.

yeah he is absolutely foul and aggressive and degrading harry but like i said before (in my tag essay lol) judit also makes ableist comments and i don’t see people hating her because she’s outwardly nice—

and respects harry as her superior. her BOSS.

(also a friend with benefits? /nope, it’s just him harassing judit/ as well but not as a complicated relationship compared jean and harry’s brötherbund. only a few months of acquaintanceship.)

plus it’s highhlyyy likely that harry is not the only one substance abuse. —look at jean’s rudolf-looking-red-ass-nose. a drunkard’s sniffers. probably had few lines with him late at night… when your lifetime partner is an alcoholic it's hard to say no.

about the left for dead thing, they left because harry told them to fuck off. tbh harry is nightmare to work with esp pre-bender. (and am saying as a pathetic little unmedicated neurodivergent woman.)

but when the second time they left revachol was not jean’s fault, and it was judit’s suggestion anyway. the squad probably thought that since harry had someone a little more responsible looking after him. it will be fine when they come back. the tribunal was absolutely unaccounted for.

yet despite all of these things, he will try to come back to make sure he is ok and accommodate harrier to the best of his abilities which is wearing very thin. look at him trying to make up to our harry boy:

anyways am incapable of writing coherent thoughts (even though i want to talk about it for hours) that make sense so go look at sygneth’s jean psychological analysis instead. it is an excellent read. please go read.

#op might wanna get their eyes or head checked lol. they looked at a little too much fanart. #+do not interact with the original poll. don’t look it up. it’s not worth it. don't give it traction. don't attract drama. #am sure op is just a troll. prob barely spent any time playin/readin DE. not that i am that much media literate but still... #i am sure there are things i left out. oh well... #i know that you need high EDC build run or lotta reading to understand so his “lore” so is kinda gatekept-- #but it’s frustrating to see shit takes like this lmaoo #also don’t get me wrong i like judit. she is a tired working woman w/ a pathetic husband + 2x children. she just wanna grab jean & go home. #p.s stella as in stella from ‘‘helluva boss’’. idk didn’t like its S2 i think she coulda been more complex character. #but not everything needs to be deep and meaningful i guess. simple villains are ok. #her anger is justified towards her husband’s infidelity but she’s kind of a dumb royal brat. esp in s2. just calls of his assassination rig #heron vs secretary #angry bird vs angry bird shit fr beuh #disco elysium #jean vicquemare #jean posting #jean heron vicquemare #loyal is the he… #no. am not tagging HB or stella. #kinda long #longish post #cryptid rambles

[vvanessaives]

used this picrew to make my new skyrim crew :3

Hiraeth (they/she/he) || Sibylla (she/her) || Dervera Sathro (she/they)

the dragonborn, the ex-dragon priest now vampire and pain in the ass, the dunmer fed up with everyone's bullshit

#rena.txt #they all mean soooooo much to me in such a short time it's crazy #some cool facts i think are Very Cool: dervera has a enchanted prostethic arm (her left one) which is a spriggan's arm basically but the #typical very long claws of the spriggans are..shorter kjdfk so she can actually use her fingers. sibylla has basically seen soooooo much of #the world's history. she was a dragon priest yes and she used that power to trans her gender. yea. with how powerful dragon priests #were i'm 100% convinced someone could do that with magic. am i wrong? idc. she died at some point bc she betrayed the other priests #when the rebellion started and didn't end up as a crusty lich. Things happen and she's reborn as a vampire let me just say molag bal wants #her dead and both me & sibylla want that bitch dead so we're a team. #still working on my google doc with the info might share it when done idk...if anyone wants to hear the Lore..play with our ocs like dolls #in my tes phase again fr. reading the lore isn't enough i need to get run over with it #oc: hiraeth #oc: sibylla #oc: dervera #these picrew is so cute i might add it into the doc #i'm so brain dead with them that i kept typing lore while watching masterchef 🇮🇹. didn't follow the ep with the 3 stars michelin #restaurants WTF WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME that's usually my fave ep. oc love makes me do silly things

[akkivee]

hey i got double bingo lol!!!!!!!

the blank if you want it lol

#this is vee speaking #these spaces are a bit shallow so to say but we ballin lol #i agree the stage has better writing but since i think they did my fav dirty and stage bat imo is the most shallow of bat interpretations #it does not get my vote there LOL #uhhhhh idk what they mean with getting into hypmic for their fave #like you vibed with seeing how fans portrayed the character and THEN got into hypmic???? #you vibed with a character and decided to take a chance????? got into hypmic by proxy and have just been rolling with it????? #depending on the answer i would have another space filled since it was love at first sight the moment i saw ichiro lol #i need to just bite the bullet and go to a con bc the last time i cosplayed was in 2019 ADFHLGSSJLFSK #this blog is my 20k character analysis on harai kuukou i hope that’s obvious to you LOL #okay so i was definitely inconsolable when nb (&mcd) broke up!!!!!!! like got fcked up when it first dropped and after a reread lol #but not like weeping weeping so does the panic episode i had after mtr’s 2nd drb drama track count or is that mentally ill #i personally don’t think i theorise but i also don’t consider myself an artist so idk lol ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #once upon a time ago i would have said doppo is just like me fr lol but i don’t hate my job actually!!!!! #and yeah nemu’s best girl she’s literally low enough on the totem pole to not be arrested for crimes unlike the others 😭😭😭 #unless we count babygirls and THEN we might have an argument LOL

[arolesbianism]

I <3 transmasc Wendy because it adds another thing to the kid who does not know how to handle anything being thrown into everything pile but instead of a thing like dead sister it's the prospect that he kind of likes having short hair and the idea of being a guy and it still makes him feel like the world is ending until suddenly the ppl around him are just like fine with it and everything is like cool actually and he melts over that too until finally he's just a normal baby trans person and can get back to being bad at coping with his other hashtag issues again

#rat rambles #starve posting #like I do have dead serious wendy trans thoughts tm even some that actually relate to his quotes high bar I know gkfndkd #its just so fun reading him as a trans egg thats one breakdown away from being smashed #and also gives me some yummy tasty thoughts abt both wendy and abby and the inivertable fact that as time goes on the only remnant of #abby's face is going to shift and change more until it can no longer even be a reminder of what was lost #which must be a Horrifying idea to wendy even if chances are he hasn't rly internalized this concept yet #and for abby especially if you're like me and go for a more silhouette style ghost design for her youve gotta imagine how fucky it is to #watch your twin grow up and change in ways you never will #Im also a agender abby who will likely never realize believer because shes just like younger me fr #like shes low key just me as a little kid but without the anxiety disorder #anyways back to the topic of wendy genderism Im honestly surprised Ive never seen a he/him wendy hc before #Im not surprised at not finding any trans guy wendys but there rly isnt much variety in nonbinary wendys despite it being fairly common #I just like trans guy wendy cause he gives me those vibes #its the weird little girl to cringe fail trans man pipeline or smth idk #give him a couple years eventually he'll be a grimy lil freak of a teenage boy #if abby didnt die and knew abt gender stuff itd still take her 30 years minimum to even consider she might be not a girl maybe #not because she's hard in denial abt gender stuff shes just is in the classic headspace of 'well I dont Think I care so I must be cis ig' #same with my aro abby hcs but walter is super not helping #as Ive said before they are aro echo chamber besties dont try to tell them romance is real they will not believe you #hey better then whateve the fuck wendy would have to go through if one of the trans men around him offered solidarity #I would rather die than get advice from wilson are you kidding me #the only somewhat normal trans guy there is warly but hes french so it cancels out

[nozomijoestar]

The facial expressions in this part of their Tag 2 ending always gets me because it's like Asuka was hoping this wasn't more stupid shit going on, and she's more disappointed before she gets irritated and wants to make sure this set up was deliberate rather than automatically assume the worst, speed running the five stages of grief lol

#she's like Wait no -> are you for real rn -> i wish you would just be normal -> tell me it's not true that you're being irritating fr #idk i think it says something about how Asuka might want to see the good in ppl first before she lets her temper fly #bc if she didn't have that hope of the good in people she would just throw hands and not ask even basic questions to confirm how to react #doing my fag research again #tekken #asuka IS capable of questioning her behavior it's just the rash temper seems to win out even when she wants to control it at times #also i recommend watching it in cutscene it comes across better than my screenshots lol you see her face genuinely feel like she doesn't #Want to think the worst of Lili and that rationale is clashing with feeling hurt that this could be petty instead #im a Asuka Wouldn't Mind Getting Along With That White Girl Actually If She Would Just Calm The Fuck Down Around Asuka believer

[florida3exclamationpoints]

.

#i said i was gonna see how today goes and decided about resigning then #well its 2:30. im just gonna do it #like. omg. the manager asked me how i felt about hoe it was goi g snd i was just like..... idk #he said 'a little improvement is better than nothing so just try 😀' BRO?????? #that's what ive been doing for A MONTH is trying and improving a little bit and you're telling me he cant even tell?????? #bc!!!! he thinks i just dont wanna do it ajd anxiety is an excuse ive said this the whole time!!!!!!!!! #but fr. before this its been 'talk to EVERYONE' now he says a little is ok but he doesn't think ive even done that. #nice :) #also someone came in wearing an eras shirt and i wanted to say smth to her about it but my anxiety was too high already #so. if this is gonna be what every shift feels like i cant keep doing it #and if i come back after vacation im just gonna be prolonging the anxiety bc im still gonna have to quit at some point #i still need to look for a new job #might as well get it over with now ig #my stomach hurts :) #she was a baker girl

[scattered-winter]

.

#officially we wont know how things will shake down until next week #but unofficially?? i think i already know. i cant explain how but. i think i know already which direction its gonna go #and its not like i havent been preparing for this for years but . man. #i genuinely dont know how im gonna do this guys. im being so fr. #im just starting to get my feet back under me from losing my friend like that and now im gonna get bowled over again #and its gonna be so much worse. and i dont know how im gonna get a job or fix my fucked gpa or even finish out the semester #im going home in a few weeks and my siblings and i are gonna put pink in our hair for october #and ofc by the time we do that we'll know. one way or another. and thatll be that. #nothing i can do about it. nothing i can do to stop it or make it better. #my brothers are still so fucking young man. my youngest brother doesnt even remember a time when it wasnt like this. #he's only ever known this version of her thats sick and exhausted and hollowed out like she isnt even there most of the time #and man. idk. #really i am so close to snapping and dropping out of school and this might just be what finally breaks the thread. i am being so fr. #winter speaks #personal #and theres so many projects that i want to do but i Know that i wont be able to do any of them for a while once it hits #and just. hhh. hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

[themoonking]

sorry not sorry but if you were ever a prequel hater i'm gatekeeping you from being a prequel lover now that it's popular to do so. you don't get to shit on the prequels for no reason only to turn around and be a prequel stannie (ESPECIALLY a hayden christensen stannie) now that kenobi is the hot new star wars thing. obikins don’t touch my post, i am also gatekeeping you <3

#the prequels had shitty dialogue? that's subjective but either way its the same exact quality of dialogue as the original trilogy #so if you constantly make fun of the pt for its dialogue you HAVE to constantly make fun of the ot for ITS dialogue #or else we both know that thats not the actual reason its just an excuse #the prequels had shitty cgi? they were all made in the late nineties/early aughts i wont say this this was the most cutting edge shit around #but it was pretty standard quality special effects for the time #you can't hate on a film because it's cgi aged poorly its unfair because this was quality shit at the time #the story was dumb? i have nothing to say to that because i can't help you if you don't have taste #ewan mcgregor was the only actor from the prequels that the 'fanbase' was even a little bit kind to #hayden christensen never got a moment's peace about his (fucking GOOD) performance and yet somehow despite that #maintains nothing but love for the films and excitement and joy at his return which makes absolutely no sense #because given the amount of shit he got he should be going through a (completely justified) fucking joker arc fr #natalie portman was treated horribly for daring to be a woman in a star wars film and then even more after the films were made #for daring to talk about star wars #despite the fact that she was In The Movies #like that one tumblr post where someone sends an ask about who does she think she is wearing a star wars shirt when she probably #hasnt seen the movies #(same ask might have also called her a bitch idk) #where the person who received the ask has to be like 'that's natalie portman and she was IN THE MOVIES' #jake lloyd's life was basically ruined and he was a fucking child when he was in the phantom menace (never forgiving y'all for that one) #and even alleged prequel lovers act like they needed to be 'fixed' like the way some 'pt lovers' talk about tcw and how it 'fixed' the pt #as if they arent just spouting the same shit that pt haters say fr #but that's a topic for another day another post i wont get into that now #i speak #star wars #kenobi #i've been a prequel stannie basically from birth i wont allow former pt haters to jump on the bandwagon #you know how people who hated the amazing spider man films started being andrew garfield stans after nwh came out? #and ppl who were constantly shitting on rpatz for the cardinal sin of playing batman before a TRAILER was even released #suddenly became stannies once the film was released and was best batman film ever made? #and how ppl who were stannies from the beginning were like 'absolutely fucking not'?

[astrxealis]

hi good evening i disappeared for most of the day after rambling a lot bcs i suddenly felt super lonely and tbh it isn't. fully gone and it never will be but also i'm doing better now. also hi new zero theme even if i said i would do a ffxiv or gbf theme. also i almost forgot to say hence this is added into this post but yeah i disappeared and wrote a lil for my wol for bits in msq where she is dreadfully alone and you’d think letting out my feelings would help and it kinda did but what helped most was me fixing the docs with the layout and all haha i’m kind of a workaholic methinks. also i’ll finish gbf main story soon i promise. also i’m sleeping before 1 am today as well i promise

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #also hi i will never stop rambling Hashtag I Love To Talk Even If I Feel Like No One Listens Sometimes Which Is Okay (Mostly) #and hi i made like a bunch of zero icons recently so i was like yo i want to use this so i then also made a gif (wholly made by me <3 #except for the video ofc being taken from the official cutscenes of the game ofc. i think.) yeah <3 #i really want to get more into all kinds of editing so i'll do more notion and gdocs stuff soon alongside tumblr editing sb actually being #active soon and i'll start making more gifs and all but tbh idk either bcs i might just compile them all for myself because i prefer it #that way but yeah i'd love to do stuff for friends and mutuals and literally anyone so hi that is that #okay i will stop rambling now! i finished my chem hw w/o breaking down so that's great. also i lov my mom sm mwah #also for the first time in so long she made the mango graham thing again and i am sad she didnt call for me to help bcs i miss doing that #but idm bcs it is so fun to eat also it is almost the weekend and i want to do my homework in advance but also write and game and do sm #but i will uh fr stop rambling for now. also in advance hii good night

[crybaby-bkg]

okay I have like three or four non related kinktober fics I wanna write and upload to my ao3 but my question is, do I wait and post them during November when everything is over with or should I just post them whenever I want during October??? I wanna wait so I won’t confuse people but at the same time I HATE waiting and have proven this by writing all my other kinktober fics a month early and having to play the waiting game which makes me anxious lmfao

#SO HARD #I have an izu fic I’m probably gonna finish tonight (hopefully) #so I was like man I might as well post it before my Friday scheduling starts up #idk I’m so picky #okay bye lemme finish writing these so I can read the new fics that have dropped already 🏃‍♀️ #all my British moots are feeding the hell outta me and I’m genuinely so excited AHHHH let me finish 🏃🏼 #—in store chit chat! 🍫 #I also got another wax today and did NOT enjoy it at all #I think she overcharged me and was toooo fucking rough and used so much powder??? #like I had powder IN me like bitch are you tryna give me an infection #AND SHE KEPT LIKE PRESSING ALL HARD ON MY CL*T???? LIKE WHY ARE YOU TOUCHING THAT???? #did not enjoy at all #okay bye fr this time

[goldkirk]

I have not volunteered a single fact about my past and my new therapist has not asked a single thing about my past and it’s weird but I’m interested to see if trying therapy THIS way helps.

We talk about my symptoms, we talk about my perspective and thoughts about symptoms and events, and that’s IT. I keep waiting for her to ask about something or ask why I think xyz way or whatever and she doesn’t, and I thought it’d be best to start therapy by giving the best summary I could to therapists but I keep running away from them eventually and so this time I was like “what if I just don’t” and we’re three sessions in and she just asks lots and lots of questions. Like, questions I can ANSWER, about daily life stuff or what I think about xyz. I knew you could do it like this, just going in to get help with symptoms and not actually talking about anything, but I didn’t think that meant ME

#what do you MEAN I can say the most objectively wrong perspective on something from Trauma Brain Learning and she just rolls with it?? #what do you MEAN I can just say 'literally every person is dangerous and could flip at any given time' and then not have to explain that #what do you mean I can just talk about being numb and not have to connect it to past things #so weird. good weird #i hate doing this because i feel like the longer i don't give her background #the more i might be phrasing my responses for Implications and leading her to think like #way worse things happened to me than did #or I had a totally different kind of situation #that was nothing like the very good life I've had #but I ALSO know that traumatized people never think they had it bad enough #but I'm also just speaking Loaded Implications #and some things WERE worse than I thought but most things were NOT as bad as sometimes saying them without context makes them seem #so anyway it's just wild #we're out here riding the wild west train to therapyville and it'll be fun to look at these posts two years from now #if i'm still alive #PLEASE don't scold me for saying that it's just v much the headspace i'm in so far in 2022 i am not suicidal i just have a lot of old brain #pathways active and a lot of them tie back to 'ultimately if x happens again you can just die instead of going back to that' or 'i mean it's #best if you get to a great point in life but like things can happen and you MIGHT die idk. you weren't even supposed to make it this long' #which is a WHOLE nother kettle of fish I KNOW #but like fr fr I was definitely supposed to die before mid high school and i don't like that so much has happened since then #i didn't PLAN for any of this I didn't plan for COLLEGE #i didn't know wtf to do for college bc I didn't PLAN because I KNEW I WOULDN'T LIVE THAT LONG CLEARLY #and then I DID #that sucks. i mean i'm not saying it sucks that i'm still alive #i'm saying it really really really fucking sucks that i din't think to mention to a SINGLE adult in any area of life #that I was gonna die before being an adult #bc ANYONE would've been like 'wtf actually katie. wtf' #but nooooooo i just didn't mention it and thought it was TRUE and not just a stupid dumb personal feeling #i was like 100% sure I was gonna get cancer or something similar before junior year of high school #I AM OUT OF COLLEGE AND I HAVE AN ENTIRE DOG. I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL YOU DO TO BE A PERSON

[angelguk]

can I ask how you find the time to create and write when you're busy? I find all of my time being devoured by school and work, and I really miss painting and writing. the most I manage is late-night journaling. your writing is so gorgeous and ur posts about tarot have made me really curious about trying too. I guess, how do you find the space to let the creative in you breathe?

i most definitely poorly manage my time im afraid, either its sacrificing sleep or procrastinating something to get a little writing done. the most a do is 1-2 hours of writing and thats not even daily (sometimes its all i manage in a week :/). i wish living wasn't as time-consuming as it is, i would love to just spend my time writing and looking at media for inspo but nope! this is really shitty advice sorry but thats honestly because i need advice in this area too

#me the other day in between university conferences looking for inspo for my next substack #or rn i just took a quick break from calling landlords to answer this #sidenote the housing crisis is INSANE LIKE AHHHHHH i might my homeless this upcoming academic year fr #i dont even want to think about the dissertation research i havent started #im really holding on by a thread i hope u r doing better than #me #but deffo keep up with the journaling!! being creative doesn't have to be a big project it can be anything you have some time for #wait as for painting/art my sister used to do this thing where she draws/sketches in car journeys #idk if that might help (like if ur commuting u can do that!)

[dokyeomini]

it actually hurt me to my core to see ray lash out at the bar because it was such a clear example of self destruction and then him running away while drunk and high and idk what was going on in his mind but it was scary bc it is scary when your friend does that and they might say some incredibly hurtful things but it doesn't even matter bc you wanna make sure they're safe

#be in that situation a few times and it changes your brain chemistry fr #when my friend lashes out out of the blue i know it's bc she's not doing well mentally #and im not like trying to pathologise this or whatever #but she has said she might have bpd and idk when she's drunk and nkt doing well #everything and everyone is against her #and when she sobers up she doesn't even remember and definitely doesn't feel like that anymore #idk yeah. i think that's why i know not to take things to heart when sb says stuff while drunk #in a very volatile way