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sunyoonandstars · 6 years

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BTS Scenario 1.2.: Him being too busy with work to make time for you (while you are having a hard time)

Scenario

They’re busy with work, and don’t seem to be able to make time for you, so you keep dropping by. Because you also have a very demanding schedule and only ever get a few days off a week / month, so you desperately want to spend your valuable free time spend with your love …

angst, fluff, hurt/comfort

(I postet the same scenario with Jin a few days ago, have a look if you like)

Enjoy!

2. Min Yoongi / Suga

When you started going out with Min Yoongi, you knew very well what you were getting into. First off, he was a famous idol. Secondly, he was a workaholic and truly passionate about his music, almost to a level where his passion became unhealthy, always forgetting to eat, drink or putting off sleep until he was completely drained. Also, he would always put his music first. He made that clear from the beginning.

„I just want you to know, y/n, I love you, I really do, like I never loved anyone in my life before. You are my muse, you always inspire me to be better and are there to take care of me when I don’t even know that I need help. You complete me. But music will always me my first love, my greatest passion, and I will put it first no matter what. However, that does not mean I don’t love you, okay? I will always love you. But you can never have my heart all to yourself.“

You understood, being an artist yourself. And his passion was one of the things you admired and loved about him.

However, over time it became harder and harder to accept the fact, that you would always be second place when it came to Yoongis love and attention. He spent almost all his time at the studio, working on, producing and recording new songs, even collaborating with other artists, and traveling a lot in the process. Sometimes he would even forget to let you know that he was out of town. A couple of times you stopped by at the dorm or the studio to surprise him, only to find out that he was God knew where, working on a song with God knew who, for God knew how long. You tried your best to shrug it off and hide your disappointment, but the other members noticed anyway. They tried to cheer you up, telling you that he treated them no differently, and even invited you to stay for a meal.

„Jin cooked for us“, Jung-kook added excitedly. „You have to stay!“

They tried their best to make you feel better, and you really appreciated it. However, it only made things worse. Throughout the whole meal, you had to hold back tears, not having heard from Yoongi for almost a week, his text message responses conspicuously short or non existent, and only being reminded of his absence by the presence of the others.

When the evening came to an end, you expressed your gratitude, for them taking time out of their busy schedules just for you, to each and every one of them. Finally you said your goodbyes to Jin and pulled him aside.

„What is it?“, he asked, concerned by the look on your face.

„Jin, oppa, I’m a little ashamed to even ask this of you, but could you and the others please not mention to Yoongi that I stopped by so many times while he was gone? I don’t want him to feel guilty. He is working on something that is very important to him and is gonna be important to countless others. I would never forgive myself for being a distraction and getting in the way of his work and passion.“

For a few seconds Jin looked you in the eye seriously and inquiringly.

„Y/n, is that really what you want and what you think is best for the two of you?“

You nodded vigorously, your throat closing up as you tried to swallow your tears.

„Alright then. We won’t say a word. But if Yoongi asks about you by himself, I won’t lie to him. None of us will. So I won’t make any promises.“

„Fair enough. I can’t ask any more of you. Thank you, Jin.“

„You’re very welcome, y/n. Take care, don’t skip your meals. And don’t worry too much. Min Yoongi loves you. I’ve never seen him this crazy about another person before. He would never hurt you intentionally, and I’m sure he’ll come back around eventually.“

Yeah, sure.

That night you almost couldn’t gather the strength to make it back to your tiny flat in the outskirts of Seoul, depression taking a toll on you again, not only mentally but also physically. You felt as if every bit of energy had been drained from your body, leaving nothing more but an empty shell. You would’ve needed Yoongi by your side right now. Not to fix you. Nobody could fix you, you knew that and you didn’t want anybody to do so either, had never expected Yoongi to take on this responsibility. Your demons were yours, and you were the only one who could tame them, a fact you were well aware of.

You had been living with mental illness for as long as you could remember. It was just a burden you had to bear, and your friends, your family and especially Yoongi kept reminding you of how strong you were and how well you were doing, managing to study and work part time in spite of depression and anxiety haunting you.

You knew for a fact that Yoongi, all too familiar with depression and anxiety himself, thought of you as one of the strongest people he knew. That, in his eyes, you were a warrior, and he was immensely proud of you, witnessing your progress and making it on your own in a big city like Seoul, all the while battling your demons on a daily basis. He had told you so repeatedly, making sure you would never forget how brave you were. Although, in this moment, on this evening, as you gathered your last strength, in order to drag yourself upstairs and into your tiny apartment, you could have needed a reminder. Simply him saying those words again, whispering at your neck that everything was gonna be okay, that he was there for you, always, and that he loved you for all your scars, your strength and even your sadness. That he would fight by your side until the end. That he loved you.

You crumbled to your knees as soon as the apartment door clicked shut behind you, gasping for air, tears stuck in your throat. They were there, the tears, a whole sea of them, drowning your heart in their salty despair, making it almost impossible to breathe, but they just wouldn’t manage to escape from your body, a dark force holding them back, slowly but surely suffocating you.

You were too tired to cry. Too tired of it all.

You barely managed to brush your teeth before you went straight to bed, laying awake for hours, too tired to sleep, just staring at the ceiling in the dark, longing for Yoongis kisses and his arms around you, lulling you to sleep. But who knew where he was at this moment. Probably at some studio, completely engrossed in his song writing, or brain storming with some pretty female idols, working on producing a track for their next mini album, not even sparing you one of his precious thoughts.

But it was okay, you kept telling yourself, repeating the phrase over and over in your head like a mantra, as if your heart would suddenly acknowledge it to be true, if your inner voice just sounded convincing enough.

You had always known that Yoongi needed his space, that to him there was nothing more important than music, and he was not someone to share his every second of free time with you, or another person in general for that matter. He needed a certain amount of time to himself, at least a few hours a day, to center himself and process, to gather his thoughts and let the creativity flow. In that way, you two were certainly similar. You, too, were a very private person and needed the space and time to retreat, which Yoongi had always given you gladly. However, until now you had always somehow managed to find a common ground, to make time to be with each other, even if it meant you would merely stay home, listening to music, napping in each others laps or watching a random movie together until you fell asleep side by side. These days, though, you barely heard from him at all. Yoongi seemed so distant on the phone. And after number of rather short, empty and belated replies on his part, your text messages, too, naturally turned, from frequent, warm, concerned and loving inquires and random reminders throughout the days to get enough sleep and don’t skip meals, to brief, stiff and rare.

You wondered if he would get the subtext. Knowing Yoongi, he probably wouldn’t, and maybe it was for the better. You knew his work was important to him, and the last thing you wanted was to be the figurative millstone around his neck.

Another week went by without seeing Yoongi face to face. He was back at the dorm, that much you knew, since hundreds of thousands of fans tweeted about the latest episode of BTS Run, in which he had to sing his famous rap from BTS Cypher 4 dressed up as a high school girl as punishment for losing a game. However, you had decided against contacting him first. You would give him the time and space he needed. If he wanted to be with you, he would make the first step. You had tried often and hard enough over the course of the past weeks, and you had to protect what was left of your pride. Now it was his turn to show some initiative.

In your current state you weren’t exactly good company, anyways, you thought to yourself, so you wouldn’t impose on him. Yoongi would come to you eventually. And if he wouldn’t - well, in that case your relationship was probably not meant to work out from the very start.

Throughout the following days, you did your best to push back any occurring thoughts of Yoongi, haunting you like bloodsucking demons while you were at work, trying to study, under the shower or even in your sleep. Any feelings you had for him, you locked away in your aching heart, until there was nothing left but numbness, because otherwise your life simply wouldn’t have been bearable anymore. Numbness was still better than seemingly unrequited love.

One night you came home late. It was already long past midnight. After you had gotten off work around ten that evening, you had decided to visit him at the studio, in order to finally confront Yoongi about his evasive behavior. However, he was nowhere to be found, so you went on to check out the dorm. But when you arrived, the other members confessed to you that he had left hours ago and was probably somewhere crosstown by now, at some studio working with some artist he had recently started a collaboration with.

„We don’t know for certain. These days, he barely tells us anything. When he left, Yoongi seemed flustered“, Namjoon had recalled. „He kept going on about having to see some woman - I couldn’t get her name - and something about a song, I think. But, if you ask me, he isn’t in his right mind right now, so don’t think too much of it. He’s been pretty absentminded lately. I think anxiety is taking its toll on him again. I tried talking to him but he wouldn’t open up to me. Sorry.“

Namjoons words were still with you when you closed the door to your dark, empty apartment behind you. And they hurt. Stung your heart like the cold tip of a poisoned dagger.

So, Yoongi was off to see some other woman? And for her he could make time? Lucky girl. You would never have picked him for the cheating type, though. Your disappointment in him was even more painful than the fact that he had disrespected you like that. Your stupid heart refused to believe that the Min Yoongi you had gotten to know and love was capable of something so ruthless and cowardly, that all his promises of love and protection had in the end been nothing but meaningless words.

But the evidence told against him.

Still … You couldn’t bring yourself to see Min Yoongi as a cheating coward.

And then — Your heart skipped a beat as you actually saw him. There. Right in front of you, fast asleep on your very couch, his peaceful face bathed in silvery moonlight, a small white parcel pressed to his chest. He lay so still, you instinctively had to check and see if he was breathing, a habit you had formed over the months, since Yoongi regularly fell into a sleep so deep and motionless you almost couldn’t tell if he was even still alive. You sighed in relief as soon as you felt his warm breaths strike your palm, following a calm, natural rhythm. So, he was alive. But not well. Not well at all. Even by briefly scanning his figure in the dark you could detect a significant loss of weight since you last saw him. His cheek bones almost seemed to piece his pale skin.

Oh, Yoongi, what is going on in that pretty head of yours? What is doing this to you, to us? Why won’t you talk to me?, you wondered while you stood there, staring, just watching him sleep.

Not wanting to wake him, you silently took out your favorite blanket and carefully tucked him in. Once your work was done, you turned away, headed for your room, without getting very far. A hand on your wrist held you back. Taken aback, you came to a halt, barely managing to hold in a gasp.

„Y/n, don’t go.“

Yoongis voice was hardly more than a whisper. Slowly, you tuned back around to face him. He looked up at you, his deep, black eyes fixed on yours.

„What are you doing here?“, you ask, your tone a little too harsh maybe, doing your best to hide the quaver in your voice.

„I waited here for hours, y/n. First, I tried to catch you at your workplace, but they told me you’d already left, so I came here. Initially, I wanted to wait outside, but I fell asleep in the hallway. An old lady almost toppled over my legs. So I let myself in. I hope that’s okay?“

You shrug your shoulders.

„Sure. It’s not like you haven’t been here before. And I gave you the access code, after all.“

Your wrist was still caught in his tight grasp. It didn’t seem like he was planning on letting you go anytime soon. Minutes went by, the two of you remaining in paralysis, trapped in each others eyes.

In the end it was Yoongi who broke the unbearable silence.

„I wrote a song for you.“

He held up the white parcel. Questioningly you raised an eyebrow. Without further explanation he got up from your sofa, effortlessly finding his way to your stereo even in the darkness, because that was how familiar he was with your place, having spent countless hours of intimate togetherness within these four walls.

You had a hard time holding back the tears as the smooth hip-hop beats filled the night, Yoongi’s smooth voice coming from the speakers, breaking your heart. After the song was done, you remained in silence, for minutes that felt like an eternity.

„It’s beautiful“, you whispered, your eyes stuck to the ground, afraid you’d break out in tears as soon as they’d meet his.

„It’s how I feel about you, y/n. This song is not me, it’s not mine. It’s what I carry inside of me. It’s what I feel for you. I know, it’s not perfect, and there is so much more. But I couldn’t stop thinking about you while I was away. And I realized something. Something I didn’t want to accept as a truth before. And it scares the shit out of me.“

He paused, and you forced yourself to look up at him. Yoongis beautiful face was distorted in despair. And you saw it in his eyes, then and there. Everything he had tried to express to you so desperately, lacking the right words. You saw it all. And you couldn’t believe you had ever doubted him.

Slowly you came towards him, one arm still stuck in his grip, taking your free hand to cup his face, your mere touch easing his expression immediately.

„I know, Yoongi, I know.“

You leaned towards him, kissing his lips, your eyes closed. He responded without hesitation, pulling you towards him, pressing your body against his strong chest, his lips opening up to yours, the shared kiss growing from soft to passionate in a matter of seconds. You only broke it off to refill your lungs, the two of you breathless.

Still breathing heavily, you slung your arms around his neck, leaning your forehead against his.

„I love you like crazy, you know that, babe?“, he whispered, his hands caressing your back, following your soft curves through the fabric of your sweatshirt.

You kissed him in response, since your vocal chords couldn’t be trusted right now, silent tears of relief streaming down your face.

„I’m so glad you waited for me, y/n. I was so afraid — after the others told me you had come by the dorm and the studio so many times, trying to reach out, desperate — I was so afraid you’d given up on me. I was so afraid I’d pushed you away. I could have never —“

You put a finger to his soft lips in order to silence him getting all worked up again.

„It’s okay, I’m not going anywhere. I love you too fucking much, you know?“

You could feel Yoongi chuckle against your neck.

„Seriously! You have no idea how much I love you, everything about you. And I knew, or at least hoped, you’d come back around eventually. Just, please, Yoongi, next time you’re going through some shit like this, reach out to me, tell me what’s on your mind so I can be there for you the same way you always are for me.“

You leaned back to look him right in the eye.

„Please, Yoongi, can you promise me that much? There’s no reason for you to keep your feelings and thoughts to yourself. Not even your fears. As long as we trust each other and communicate, there’s nothing we can’t do. Together.“

Yoongis gaze lingered on your face, as he slowly shook his head, before he leaned down to place a soft kiss on your forehead.

„How the fuck do I even deserve you?“

***************************

I hope you liked it! Feel free to leave a comment! Open for requests!

Thanks for reading! Take care! 💜

Here you can find my Masterlist if you feel like checking out more of my BTS fiction!

All GIFs used are NOT mine. Credit goes to the initial creators. Thank you for your hard work and dedication.

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