#anyway we'll see lol whatever happens I'm excited! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

narastories · 1 month

Text

catching up about fandom stuff

Oh, hi! Do you mind if I ramble a bit?

I feel like I've been a little distant and antisocial in the past few months due to personal stuff (mainly because my trauma bucket got kicked over many, many times, but also I've been trying to get the ball rolling on a few things I've been meaning to do for a while). And I know I'm not the only one who has been having a hard time. But now it's spring here, and I'm feeling a little hopeful and a bit more inspired. Is it just me? Do we dare to be hopeful??

I'm reminding myself that both of my favorite urban fantasy series, and main fandoms nowadays are due a new book maybe this year, and that is exciting and very much things to look forward to! It also makes me want to quickly write fic ideas I have before the canon status quo changes lol (Not that it matters. I believe you can write whatever you want. But with both of these series, we love to theorize about what is going to happen, so it feels like things are just not going to be the same when we get new pieces of information, you know?)

I'm also acutely aware that I haven't posted a Harry/Nic fanfic since the OTP challenge in NOVEMBER 2022 wtf. And uh, yeah. If you needed any further proof of my poor mental health then it is probably proof enough that I haven't touched my favorite obscure little OTP.

The good news is, that I have actually been inspired to write lately. I'm doing a little re-read of the FPA books, and also Skin Game, and it's all putting me back in the mood for fanfic. And I have been typing away for the past few weeks, trying to get back into it.

The bad news is, that I don't feel like posting things yet. I just want to be kind to myself and create without having to worry about sharing it. I know this might sound hypocritical bc I just shared a post about connecting in fandom. At the same time, sometimes it does good for a story to just let it sit and simmer a bit.

There is this expression (that I don't think is actually very popular in the English language) "to write for the drawer" and I never thought that was a bad thing. Sure I write very niche stuff so you would think it doesn't matter either way, but a story is never the same after you release it out into the world. So it's okay to keep it to yourself for a while and tinker with it and enjoy the process.

I also discovered gif making for myself. (If you have seen the gifset I posted yesterday, no you didn't :P I put it on private bc I wasn't happy with it yet. Mainly bc of the subtitle thing. I either have to figure out a clever overlay or venture out into the foreign planes of the internet to forage a little bit more lmao) I think the popularity of gifsets on tumblr is so fascinating, bc it's a format that just isn't very popular elsewhere (or convenient lol). When I was younger in fandom I never had a good enough computer to do this kind of editing. So now it just made me so happy to realize that my computer can do it, and I found it a relaxing activity.

I already dipped my toe in it with that Hellraiser/DF quote gifset, but now I figured out a method to make it look a lot better. And with open source tools too! That made me especially happy lol But I also realized that if I want to post gifsets then I might have to break my "no sideblogs" rule... Anyway, this is just one more thing that I will probably experiment with privately, and then we'll see if I put it out there or not.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is: creative hobbies are important. And if you can bring yourself to do them even when you feel like shit, it usually helps to feel a little less shitty. And that I will incubate my little projects for a while longer and then maybe I will feel like sharing them.

#personal #that's what's been going on in my head #how are we all doing?#fandom #nara rambles #also tumblr has been really bad lately and didn't show me posts from a lot of mutuals #so that didn't help

13 notes · View notes

jaymesyourplaything · 25 days

Text

Transparency pt 2

ĥamlo- how the hell did i do that anyway LOL i wanted to officially declare my disincludement in the situation- who the hell is blasting tiktoks i got this girl in the hospital next to me scrolling through tiktok honestly euthanasia at this point i am not gonna listen to her tiktoks all fucking day

she did, in fact, listen to this girls tiktoks all fucking day.

i did not get euthinized. failed opportunity. anyway.

i'm over it, it's done anyway. i'm not gonna have any more posts i guess? about it, i'm going to continue blocking their blogs,, i haven't yet because the last two days have been cray cray ehe my hand is declining (LOL ) and my partner got into a work accident. they had surgery and might need another, but high hopes. mostly i'm busy ehe helping my partner (with one hand 😵‍💫🥴😵‍💫 ) and then goofing off and playing games with them or something like idk it's just online stuff i'm chill.

but this is my mod account to talk about whatever mod stuff and i'm SUPER excited to get back to roleplaying, my tua oc is getting love from me again. my baby. 🤩😍🤩😍🤩😍 well. we'll see. with my hand declining i can't see the future for two handed tasks right now.

oh right but, you can ask questions about the scandal in tumblr if you want. i'll likely answer. i might chat to ver about what's happening, depending on what happens, but after i put my statement and then respond to idk what johns defense was i'm all done, not much else to do about it. (i mean, i'm done making posts myself about it. asks are chill. ily. )

and i did that already so, all good 👍 😌 ☺️ 😊 🙌 ✨️ omg those emojis that's adorable. it auto gives me emojis!

right. so. yeah that was crazy, wannit? uh, moving on. they even admitted to making burner blogs to interact with us. wtf. i'll just keep updating to staff, blocking them, going to see if bewitched is right and you can get tumblr to ban ip's from interacting with you. it's so weird to make accounts to interact with people who block you, like go away 😭😭 yah i have no idea why people think you're some harasser abuser lmao it's a mystery 😭😭😭 couldn't be the stalking interacting like boo leave me alone damn 😭🚪🏃🏻‍♀️💨

anyway peace from a currently two handed jay ✌️✌️

#jay #mod #a scandal in tumblr #uwu #SPECIAL THANKS TO GIRLIE WHO ENTERTASINED ME WITH TIKTOK I LOVE YOU LMAO #it's like having tv flashing in the background and you're a child and you're sleepy yk ? just having a nice innocent time.#my hand: i am dying #me: hey im having a dope arse time man check check #help im on pc now i lost ability to emoji

8 notes · View notes

logybearsblog · 1 year

Text

So I don't usually go on my social media to talk about serious stuff that is happening or has happened in my life, but I need to get something off my mind that's been haunting me for years. TRIGGER WARNING: I feel like I have to put a trigger warning up, because this is going to contain content about sexual assault/abuse, manipulative behaviors, toxicity in relationships, etc.

When I was a junior in Highschool, I became very close with this guy (I don't feel comfortable using his real name so we'll just call him Chaz, because Chaz from helluva boss makes my skin crawl just as much as this dude does). We both had the same interests and somewhat same hobbies and I then became close friends with Chaz.

I was dating a girl (let's call her Sammy) at the time but we broke up for whatever reason. It was highschool, whatever the reason was for Sammy and I to break up was stupid since we were just kids. After my break up with Sammy, Chaz started talking to me more and more as a way to get my mind off Sammy since the break up did really hurt me at the time (I was 16, it was stupid lol).

After awhile, I noticed Chaz was making some flirty conversation with me. He would compliment my outfit, make flirty jokes, the list goes on. I brushed it off thinking he was just doing it to be funny or just to be nice, but that also didn't stop me from having feelings for him. I soon found out he felt the same and we started dating. We hung out all the time on my days off from work, we had movie date nights, watched anime together, goofed off, we did basically everything together.

One thing lead to another and I had developed really strong feelings for Chaz. I would go as far as to say I actually loved him. However, this story doesn't have a happy ending. We didn't stick together and live happily ever after, we didn't even really date too long for obvious reasons that you'll soon find out.

One night I was at home texting Chaz and he popped the question of whether or not we could start taking things to the next level. I wasn't comfortable with it, because I had strict parents and I just didn't see the appeal of having sexual relations at the time. I was 16 almost 17, I didn't think I was ready for something like that yet. So I said no and told him that we needed to wait. We were only maybe 2 months at most into our relationship, I didn't feel like I was ready for something like that yet. I was just a kid, the only thing on my mind was when the next Pokemon game was coming out or what was going to happen on the next episode of Steven universe. Sex was the last thing on my mind, but not not on my mind? I don't know, I was 16 and stupid.

That didn't stop there. Chaz asked over and over again and not matter how many times I said no, he still asked. I should've taken that as my first red flag. We argued about it a lot, it was a lot of back and forth. It got to the point where I felt like no was no longer an answer, so I finally agreed to go through with it.

When it was said and done I felt excited but also guilty about my first time. I was excited I was no longer a virgin like some of my friends, but I was also guilty for allowing myself to let someone pressure me into something I didn't want to do. The guilt faded, but never went away.

Now that we had a more "serious relationship" the sexual advances didn't stop. In fact they never stopped, like I hopped they would. It seemed that everytime we hung out it always became sexual. No matter how many times I said "No, I really don't feel like it right now." Or "I'm on my period, I don't feel comfortable doing this right now" or even if I kept it as a simple "No." Chaz still managed to make me say yes or he would just take control and do whatever he wanted anyway.

I felt disgusted with myself. I hated that I felt like I couldn't say no, but if I did say no it would start a fight between me and Chaz. I didn't understand why sex was so important. Why was it so important? Why did he seem to only want sex? I thought we were having fun just hanging out and watching TV or playing video games, what happened to those days?

A few months went by and I started taking birth control, because of how heavy my periods were (TMI I know but this is important to the story) and because Chaz was my boyfriend, I thought I could tell him about why I had to be put on the pill. Well, needless to say it wasn't the best idea. He tried to pressure me into having unprotected sex. His excuses were "Condoms are painful." Or "it's not as good as the real thing" or "It feels like my dick is grinding on sand paper." Any excuse he could think of he was using. I kept trying to change the topic but he kept asking and even went as far as to guilt trip me into going through with it. Our whole relationship I never had the courage to stand up for myself. This time, I had to stand my ground. After all the back and forth I finally told Chaz "No condom, no sex. It is my body and I have a right to say no. You can't force me into something I don't want to do."

We didn't talk for a few days and stuck with what I said. Things went back to the way they use to be. The normal hang outs, the movies, the games, everything. I thought I changed something, but it was shot to pieces shortly after things were great again. The begging came back and no matter how many times I said no or tried to change the subject, I was tired of it. I gave up and let Chaz have what he wanted.

My confidence crumbled and I was back to basically being a toy again. I felt I hit my lowest point. Not only was this happening but I had other things going on at home. I basically shut down, but I managed to mask the pain and forced myself to keep going.

On top of everything, I did notice a change in Chaz. He was being weirdly secretive, everytime I called he asked why I called, he refused to tell me who he was with or he made up some random person. Most of the time I brushed it off, but deep down I had a feeling it wasn't something innocent. Going into my senior year, I had a rough start, but I still made new friends. I become very close with a kid we'll call Jasper. Jasper was nice, funny, and was interested in the same things I was interested in. He was a really cool person. We ate lunch together with our friend group everyday and talked about all kinds of things. I soon introduced Chaz to Jasper in hopes we could hang out and add Jasper to our friend group after school.

September rolled along and the town I live in has a festival every year to celebrate the day the town was founded. Me and Chaz hung out the whole weekend the festival was going on. He seemed standoffish and I couldn't understand why, but we still managed to have fun. That Sunday night, I got a text from Chaz and he asked if I'd ever leave him. I couldn't pin point why he would ask this but I told him I would never leave him and said I loved him. We chatted until I had to go to sleep since I had school in the morning. I didn't think anything of the conversation, I honestly thought I did something to make Chaz feel this way and felt guilty.

The next morning, I got ready like any other day. I was actually really happy that Monday. My weekend was fun and I couldn't wait to talk about it to Jasper and the others. When I got to school, I was chatting with a classmate when I saw Jasper walking down the hallway. He looked off, like he was upset about something. I asked him if he was ok and he told me we needed to talk after school. He didn't say why, but I asked him if I did something wrong. Jasper looked at me and assured me I didn't do anything wrong but that there was something wrong we needed to talk about.

This confused and scared me. In my mind I thought I did something that made him not like me anymore or if I said something that could've potentially hurt his feelings. Whatever it was I needed to figure it out. I was close with one of my teachers and I asked her for advise. She was an adult, she would know what I should do. I told her about Jasper and about the texts I got from Chaz. She told me I should tell Chaz that Jasper wanted to talk to me and if there was anything he wanted to say. So I took her advise and messaged Chaz during my resource period.

I wasn't expecting the reaction I got from Chaz. Even though it was a text, he seemed panicked. Chaz told me that no matter what he was about to tell that I had to promise to stay with him. This made my stomach drop. I told Chaz I wasn't promising anything and that he needed to tell me what was going on. He went on to say that he slept with Jasper and that he didn't have feelings for him and he didn't mean it at all. This made me sick to my stomach. Someone I trusted went behind my back and I didn't know how to process it. I felt so many emotions. Chaz knew I was already dealing with things at home (I'm not going to get into it, but it was a horrible situation) and he thought a night with someone we were close with wouldn't be a big deal. Not only that but someone who I thought was a friend and who I was very close with hurt me as well. This was the last straw. I broke things off, but what I thought was the end became a new beginning to something more stressful. Chaz would blow my phone up, come to my home to leave notes on my car after I blocked him on everything, telling my friends to make me talk to him, creating fake numbers, and more. This went on for a long time. I want to say months but thinking about it, it was almost a year of being harassed. Chaz tried to guilt me into getting back together with him and I couldn't take it. It took me threatening to get the authorities involved for him to leave me alone. After that, I was free in a sense. Things were getting better for me outside of the break up. My life was happier without him being around to hurt or control me.

It's been years since this happened. I'm in a happier place in life now. I found someone who treats me with the up most respect and showed me what real love was. They even made me feel like I was in control of my own body and showed me that consent is key.

I wanted to write this as a way to not only get it off my chest, but to also raise awareness to those who are going through the same thing I went through. The lesson to learn from this is no matter what if you aren't comfortable with doing something with someone, you're not obligated to do it just for to make the other person happy. You are in control of you, do not let others tell you or make you feel other wise. Please, I can't stress this enough, please look for red flags and read the signs that are presented to you. DO NOT make the same mistakes I did. Always stand up for yourself and know your worth.

I spent so long trying to figure out what it was that made me still feel guilty about this situation. Why was I still so disgusted with myself even after all this time? Did I not move on the way I needed to? I did research and I found out why. There's a form of sexual assault called sexual coercion.

Sexual coercion is unwanted sexual activity that happens when you are pressured, tricked, threatened, or forced in a nonphysical way. Coercion can make you think you owe sex to someone. It could be someone you trust like a friend or boyfriend/girlfriend or someone with power over you such as a teacher, boss, landlord, etc. NONE OF THIS IS OKAY!!! When I realized this is what I experienced, I felt my heart break. Not only did I let someone I trusted/loved sexually abuse me but I also gave them power over me. It took a long time for me to find my self worth and for me to love myself again.

Chaz and I haven't talked in about 4 years. However, everytime I see him in public, I mentally shut down. All the memories flow back everytime I see him and it triggers me. My fight or flight kicks in and thankfully I choose flight. I don't think he would ever try anything, but I know that he can sense my panic and uses it against me. He'll follow me without trying to make it obvious (which he still does), but I have people with me who make me feel safe. They reassure me that everything will be ok and he can't hurt me anymore. I hope that others who have or are going through this find their safe place and get their justice for what's happened to them. Everyone has a different experience but nonetheless their feelings, thoughts, and struggles are valid. To those that are experiencing this or have in the past, please know you're not alone. If any of you have experiences this and need to talk about, please don't hesitate to message me. I'm always here to listen and talk you through your feelings. You're valid, no matter what.

Thank you for reading this. I'm sorry it's so long, but it was a lot to go through. Like I've said before, please don't hesitate to reach out if you're going through this. I'll always be an ally. I love all you guys and tomorrow is a new day for everyone.

#my story #sa awareness #you are valid

11 notes · View notes

amazing-spiderling · 3 months

Note

asks for you: something you are looking forward to but haven't told anyone about? last song listened to? last thing you bookmarked? newest graphic tshirt you got yourself? last person you called just to chat? last mattfoggy prompt you gave yourself but haven't done anything with, yet? what do you want to see happen most in DD:BA?

something you are looking forward to but haven't told anyone about?

My friends are coming over this weekend for my husband's birthday party. My husband is a gamer TM and one of his favorite games is "Factorio" which is a game about being stranded on an alien planet and having to build a bunch of stuff to get your spaceship off the ground so you can go home. (I keep joking that it's big kid pikmin.) There's a lot of machinery and factories and conveyor belts, so we factored that into the party. In addition to thematically appropriate board games, we got this oval shaped lazy susan thing that is sort of like a manual conveyor belt you spin with your hand, and it looks a bit like a factory belt too. We're going to set out ingredients so people can make their own custom snacks (miso soup, salad, onigiri, mini sushi cakes, etc) and finish it off with s'mores over this little s'more maker that coincidentally looks like the forge in the game. People know the theme of the party in general terms, but I don't think any of them have played this game themselves, and nobody knows about the "build your own" aspect of the menu, so I'm excited to see their reactions.

last song listened to?

Piplup Step (Piplup Cheer You Up)

last thing you bookmarked?

Hahaha, I'm so bad at bookmarks. There's a shortbread recipe I have open that I need to come back to.

newest graphic tshirt you got yourself?

In December I got a shirt from Vapor95 that is black with these teal jellyfish on it. But like, in a vapor/chillwave kind of way, not a "I'm into aquariums" way. XD Not that there's anything wrong with aquariums lol.

last person you called just to chat?

Returned a call to my friend Tiffany and caught up about our holidays and upcoming events.

last mattfoggy prompt you gave yourself but haven't done anything with, yet?

Okay, this is SO dumb but I found a jokey meme post on tumblr last night that was about being ten and waiting for the day wings sprung out from your spine and THEN everyone would SEE. And I just imagined Foggy and Matt in college and Foggy relating all these "one day people will see how special I am" childhood fantasies he has with Matt (who is trying SO HARD for people not to see how special he is). Anyways, we'll see if anything comes of it.

what do you want to see happen most in DD:BA?

You know, I don't spend that much time hemming and hawwing over it, I'm very "whatever will be will be" and believe that no matter what happens in the new show, it can't take away my good memories of the original one. I mean, broadly, I would want to see all of the characters treated with respect not just in their individual characterization, but their importance to the series overall. IYKYK. I know we won't hear about it since they're not in place anymore, but damn would I have loved to see Matt and his thoughts on the Sokovia accords (since they were a thing in the NMCU! They played a big part in Jeessica Jones!!!) I'd also like to know more about how Fisk went from being in superjail to a viable candidate for mayor, like, I assume it had something to do with the instability of the blip but STILL? I can understand him being out of prison (who was going to run prisons during the blip) but the man was going to do LIFE and somehow he was out and about during the blip with the same level of influence over the police as before? HOW. Just, give me a flashback, give me SOMETHING. If we're going to see him try to be mayor I need to know what his "I'm totally reformed" pitch is gonna be.

#thanks for the ask!

2 notes · View notes

astralartefact · 6 months

Text

dawntrail fanfest thoughts (& prayers) Part II London

(Part I >> here)

Pour one out for Krile, I miss her.

My opinion hasn't really changed so far, still pretty optimistic over here. I didn't really get anything I really wanted (except for one thing, we'll get to it), but the things I didn't really like weren't catastrophic either, so... Let's just get into it.

Viper I don't know if I like this more or less than I would have liked Corsair (which I wouldn't have liked bc I think pirates are boring). I like the concept of the two combined swords and I think it could look very flashy, but from what I've seen so far I'm not particularly interested, the in-game job trailer really didn't do anything for me.

I guess it's because this job seems very very FF16 to me but in a bad way. Lore and Realism but with fantasy fire effects just doesn't really make for an iconic aesthetic imo... but hey, maybe they just hid the best parts from the job introduction video, they showed like two or three skills at most lol. But who knows.

But as long as I get my Green Mage/Pictomancer I'm not going to complain too much about this one. Good for the people who really love this! Love that for you!

My Green Mage/Pictomancer Hopes and Dreams Koji said "We should look to his [Yoshi-P's] hints from last fanfest" for the remaining job - so Pictomancer is still possible!!!!!! It's not over until it's over!!!

I once again realize that I shouldn't have gotten myself attached to something that might not actually be happening. If they don't do Green Mage/They do Green Mage wrong I will be so disappointed lol

It's just that I can see them do your average generic Druid instead because 'something something we need to cater to a western audience now bc FF16, Final Fantasy legacy stuff is cringe actually so we need to make everything generic western fantasy to be taken seriously' and I'm very much not here for that. Just give me a charming little Green Mage with a big staff or maybe with a judge's mallet - or maybe like one of those shogun war fans??? But I'll take whatever, even the weird ugly little gimmick you're bound to come up with.

The Limited Job Beastmaster and if it's not it better be something truly out there and not just some half-assed BS. Yoshi-P, you have to show the community you listen just a little bit, it's getting dire out here.

Eliminator Is it just me being desperate for Hamauzu-based Remixes or does this thing exude FF13 energy... Makes me wonder if the Tural-based Technology we've seen in that one dungeon art might be FF13 inspired? I just hope it isn't just Allagan again, make it another nation that lived around that time.

The Areas Kozama'uka looks really pretty... I love when fantasy background elements you can't even reach are "too big" (like FF7 Remake's Midgar Skyboxes) - so I guess Shaaloani still has a chance to win me over depending on whatever we find there. Speaking of which: Shaaloani is exactly what I pictured/dreaded a New World based expansion would look like and I do not particularly like it, I was hoping we would be save from bargain bin wild west stuff at least until we went to Northern Tural. I also hope that the pseudo-oil stuff is just lore and won't be a big part of the msq because good gravy Yoshi-P hire a diversity consultant already I'm dying over here.

The Graphics Update Now let's give it up for the real MVP of the day for all of us no graphic mod people (and to the graphic mod people that complain 'we already had that for years', quit your yappin, 85% of you don't have taste anyways.) The new lighting stuff looks amazing - especially what they did with the fog, it looks gorgeous, I'm so excited. The lighting updates on the character models look so good, too... I think you can really see the difference in that picture they showed of the femRoe scholar in the new AF gear. And the glow up on Midlander Face 1 is amazing. Is that even allowed?? This was slumbering under there all this time???

The Alliance Raid Let's just all pretend we never thought Sakaguchi was going to do them (even though he literally said he wouldn't want to do one) and never talk about it again.

Anyways. FF11. Leaving the best thing for last - this is the thing I was really happily surprised by.

I'm so happy for FF11 :) That game has it fcking rough. It's constantly the one Final Fantasy game that's just. Not even considered. Even what we would reasonably call "Real" FF fans always just leave it out of everything because "MMO" (of course ever since shb that became "the worse MMO" instead) and casual gamers - even ones that play certain FF games - probably don't even realize that nobody ever talks about 11.

But it has so many cool concepts that would warrant a treatment like Eden with FF8 - meanwhile FF14 is directly built on things 11 provided, so many of our base fundamentals, so many generic mob designs, so many of our job concepts, so many things we just take for granted come from FF11 but it still never really got the same attention as the other FFs. Yeah, Eureka and Bozja are kind of based on it, but the way it is referenced is just so different from how most of the other FFs are represented in the game - it's always just the other MMO and it deserves to be treated the same as the others: as the mainline Final Fantasy game that it is.

So I hope they give it the respect it deserves. I need these to be better than Ivalice, just so FF11 gets enshrined somewhere in some way. Their legacy is on the line, Yoshida, so don't fuck it up!!!!! And make sure to include Memoro de la Stono because I like it!!!

I do hope they don't just make one of the Reflections actual FF11 Vana'diel though, I think that would be kind of lazy, it only worked with Y:DA and even there I'm the only person who liked that because I think Kingdom Hearts Bullshit Timeline Shenanigans are fun. I hope this is a FF14 version of Vana'diel like how Ivalice is our Ivalice - with certain concepts reinterpreted through our lense while others reappear almost identically, similar to the FF12 summons.

Now, I haven't actually played 11, I'm just a passionate bystander in all of this, but the one recommendation on things 11 I can give is the Record Keeper version of Awakening - most Record Keeper arrangements are amazing (see FF13's Blinding Light) but this is definitely one of their best.

Anyways! I'm really excited for what they do with it! I don't have any particular fear they're going to fuck the raids up, from a pure spectacle standpoint (the only standpoint that matters) they generally only get better. (except for eulogia) (fuck eulogia) I do hope they make them a little more challenging again, but I also won't be mad if they don't. Just don't ruin your own lore again like with Eulogia (fuck eulogia)! Also, I would love to see the Ark Angels, especially their armors as raid drops kthxbye <3

#ffxiv #ff14 #dawntrail

4 notes · View notes

taegularities · 9 months

Note

Hello lovely Rid 💕💕

As always, there's a bunch of things I would love to ramble to you about since I haven't sent a super long ask in a bit. I always read every single one of your posts and want to talk to you about it but sometimes I just don't have the brain capacity in that moment lol. So I've made a mental list of a couple things but I'm also sure I'll forget some too 😭😭😭 here we go.

First of all, I'm genuinely super excited for anything you would like to write so I would love a teaser for any of your wips!! Because heaven to you sounds so spicy and fun and all of the evermore stories sound like they'll be so beautiful :') I saw you saying recently that you think we'll love timbre even more than c&f and if that doesn't get me hyped I don't know what would!! So as much as I love cmi, I love all of your writing and I hope you know that you can post any story you want and I'd love it!

Also you entered a writing competition!!!! That's amazing, Rid, I'm wishing you all the good luck and crossing my fingers super hard for you. That's such a cool thing to do, putting yourself out there like that and I'm proud of you for deciding to take this opportunity and not letting it just pass by! Whatever happens, I hope you know that you're an amazing and talented writer 😚😚😚

And as for your reply to my thoughts on sbw, since we both ramble a lot, I have stuff to say again lol. I have read a bunch of your stories before yeah!! Especially your JK ones, you were one of the first bts writers that I discovered on here actually 🥺🥺🥺 I keep wanting to reread not my fault too and I swear it will happen one day 😤😤😤

I was actually wondering whether it was a good time to post my thoughts about sbw exactly because you had just recently talked about your anxiety and overall bad thoughts around waterbodies and I didn't want to cause you to feel bad or sad or anxious in any way, so I'm super happy that this story actually has this healing meaning to you, like it made me sigh in relief to see you saying that. And now it's even more meaningful to me too because it makes you feel like that 🥺🥺🥺

Please don't ever apologise about rambling when you respond to my thoughts on any of your stories because I love it!!!!! I love it so much getting to know your thoughts and feelings about the story and the process behind it and any other insights. It really was an unexpected perk that I realised I got from leaving feedback, I always love it when authors talk more about their story in response to my thoughts. And you know I could listen to you talk about anything for days, Rid 🥺

Also don't ever apologise or feel bad for not responding to anything I send you. I just like rambling about the stories that make my mind spin and my heart feel full!!! And if that also makes you happy and helps you keep going in any way? or shows you how talented and appreciated you are? then I am completely happy and content. I also understand feeling overwhelmed when it comes to responding, or your brain not cooperating, there's so many fics I've read but haven't reviewed yet just because my brain wouldn't let me (also looking at the cmi essay I'm still in the middle of 😔). Please just do what your brain and heart allow you to and don't ever feel bad about it.

Anyway this got super long again, who would've thought 😭😭😭 How are you doing these days, Rid? I know I always ask that but I also always genuinely want to know. I hope you're well. And I hope you know I love you so so much 💞💞💞

jdhdhd oh god ivi, i'm sorry you have to see all those lil shitposts i make, like most of the time it's just me yelling into the void :') and that's why i appreciate that you still want to talk to me about them!!

ahhh, thank you ivi 😭 i saw that you liked kook in a bun and with glasses lol :') i'm very excited for that one, but even more so for evermore tbh. the stories are all so special to me.. they all have this lil something that makes them beautiful, i think, so i genuinely hope i'm able to put my thoughts into words the way i want them to. and yes!! i personally am loving timbre and its plot, so i hope it can be a reader fav, too!! 🤍 also not you reading nmf omfg?! 🥺 i didn't know that jfjdhdjs would love to hear your thoughts whenever (no pressure at all), but that's literally so cool. so honoured that i was one of the first bts blogs you discovered ahhh :( and don't worry about sbw.. it's so fucking thoughtful that you considered that aspect at all.. but yeah, the fic and your review were both really healing. <3

yeahhh oof, the writing competition. so excited but also so scared :') like, i've always dreamed of such an opportunity and even though it wouldn't be a huge drop, it'd be pretty cool to be at least among the top 100 writers!! tysm for believing in me 🥺🤍

i'll definitely get to your reviews one day though, because responding to the sbw feedback made me realise once again how fun it is talking to you through these commentaries. i learn so much about myself and my fics, too like that, you know? and gosh. i cannot tell you at all how excited i am for that cmi essay. like the day you send it to me, i'll probably cry gjjdhdhd but take your time, truly!! i know how hard it is to make our brains cooperate.

i've been alive lol!! yeah, no im okay. i've been dealing with anxiety a lot these days, like it's gotten super bad and it affects real life as well as my online experience (hence, all those insecure lil posts :')), but as always fighting through it all!! how are you? how's the summer treating you? 🥺💕

#'i could listen to you talk about anything for days' do u realise how romantic that sounds 🤧#love u lots and lots and lots !! 🤍#notes for rid 🌹#ivi <3 #long ask

3 notes · View notes

after-nine-at-the-oasis · 1 year

Text

AAAAH WAIT IT'S THE FALL FINALE?? For some reason I did not realize that XDD Makes sense though lol

Well that's gonna be crazy lol

Ooh yeah Bobby's definitely investigating that o.o not that I expected he wouldn't but aaaahh looks like it's gonna be intense >:D

Lol xD anyway that's a bunch of short clips but it looks like it'll be wild :))

And AHHHHH a 9-1-1 Lone Star promo!!! I saw one during one of the commercial breaks earlier that had some different stuff so I'll make a separate post for the few things I caught in there with one rewatch of the one I saw during commercials as I searched up this promo to see if there was anything I was missing lol since it went so quick.

So yeah! That's the last of my last thoughts. Looks like it'll be super intense! Now time for the. . .

REVIEW

I LOOOVED this episode. I thought it was great! A dip back into the old commentary, some angst but also a bunch of laughs lol, and my lovelies being family :DD. Plus we got Joshhhh, always love to see my boy :D. And overall just some really cool calls and such!

First off, congrats(-ish? lol) to Buuuck, it finally happened lol xD :D. Took a while but we got here xD. Anyway, I'm happy for his friends :)). And I'm glad that he finally got some (good) sleep lol, after he started being unable to as well XD. Hilarious, love my boy lol <3.

Eddie! Not much to say for him, though that scene with Bobby after the fire was really great. But we DIDN'T GET THE SHOT XDDD. The cross shot from the promos!! Rude lol. Anyway, him playing video games was great, and I'm glad he finally got some sleep xD.

(Chris: . . . you didn't sleep did you

Eddie: eat your breakfast)

(wait wait wait it's like the babygirl meme - I'll make it in a second lol because I won't finish this before tgd since I wanna finish last week's tgd review lol)

Hen, plus Karen and Denny! Very important storyline, but clearly it doesn't end here. I'm glad they were so supportive of him wanting to know and stuff, it was really nice to see :). But I'm glad Hen admitted to her emotions about it <3. Like, just because they know it's about Denny doesn't mean they can't have feelings lol! But if Denny did go to visit his bio dad in secret, I'm curious as to how that'll continue 👀👀. Welp, we'll see! Anyway, THEY'RE ADORABLE AND THEY'RE FAMILY AND I LOVE THEM <333 😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰.

Also yeah Eddie openly saying "moms" got me okay 😭😭 I don't know why (that's a lie, I do, it's because it's amazing to see on tv :'D)

Poor Josh this episode xDD. I was wondering why they were looking shifty but I couldn't think of a reason (like thinking he was up to something or had a new relationship or something didn't make sense, them scheming to stop him sleeping or something didn't make sense, although it turns out they were scheming XD). I've gotta admit though it was a hilarious plotline lol, I loved it xD. Plus I just liked seeing my boy :D. Anyway, it was great xD.

Madney!!!! AHHHHH!!! They bought a house :DDDD. I mean sure, it's known as the murder house, but it's not ACTUALLY lol. Plus I'm sure that and eit cheaper :D xD. Besides the fact that it needs to much work. I'm sure we'll see the renovation process, and I'm looking forward to it!! I'm so excited and happy for them, ahhhhh (small aaaah scream not awhhh) :))) 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰. THEM <33!

Now, onto Bobby. I feel so and for him D:. I wish his friend had survived, I was really hoping he'd be able to get through whatever he was going through, but alas :'(. And I liked that conversation Athena had with him :'). It was a nice callback, and of course I love my babeys <33. Plus I just like seeing anyone being supportive of their loved ones :)). Idk, it's just nice 🥰🥰❤️. I'm VERY interested in Bobby stopping at nothing to get answers though, it seems like it'll be super intense but I great storyline 👀👀. Not that the intensity is bad! Anyway, as long as it isn't too short or isn't drawn out too long, I think it has real potential :D. Plus, it's always wild (and a privilege lol) to just see Bobby go ham xD. Batcrap, I'll say, since I don't cuss lol. It's gonna be great >:).

Overall, I really loved this episode! I thought it was great, it had a suitably creepy atmosphere, and I thought the insomnia theme was really interesting! It left space open for moments we wouldn't normally see, which I loved :D. And the calls, plus all the family feels, and some angst? Perfect episode, in my opinion /hj <3. It was just great 🥰🥰. Between all the storylines, and the little moments, it was an awesome episode.

So yeah! I enjoyed this episode so much. It had a bunch of great parts, and I don't really have any complaints. I'm excited to see where the stories go next! This has been my review of. . .

9-1-1, Season 6, Episode 9: Red Flag

What a great fall finale! I know we'll have to wait a while for the next episode, but I'm still interested in what's gonna happen next. I'm definitely invested! I'll be back here then for my review of. . .

9-1-1, Season 6, Episode 10: In A Flash

See you then!

#9-1-1 #911 #9-1-1 on fox #911 on fox #9-1-1onfox #911onfox #gayfirefightershow #oasis's 9-1-1 chatter #such a great episode imo!!!#loved it :DD #anyway yeah turns out I did get this completed now lol!!#hopefully I can still get my tgd review from last week finished up in time xDD whoops lol #anyway yeah :)) bye guys!!!#love y'all <3333 🤗!!

4 notes · View notes

feuqueerfire · 4 days

Text

Change2561 Changing Project Lineup 2024 Showcase

I've made posts about GMMTV 2023 and 2024 (pt 1 & 2) trailer reactions but I don't tend to watch other companies' trailers because 1) some shows I'm excited about might not end up happening and 2) even if it does happen... might take 2-3 years lol. We're impatient about GMMTV's output timing but at least they usually release all their shows and withint 1.5 years of the pilot trailer since they're a big enough company with a System.

Change2561 seems to fall into that category as well, since they're kind of like GMMTV's sister company as they're a subsidiary of GMM Grammy? I'm not 100% certain, it's what I've gathered from people's comments. So I think there's a high change we'll get the shows + in a timely manner. I'm excited!

Also, I'm not watching this live, so I know what the shows are + very basic premise.

Rankings:

Most Anticipated:

Goddess Bless You From Death: suchhhh a good trailer and sounds right up my alley, I'm really hoping for a miracle with strong script + acting + cinematography. Currently one of my most anticipated BLs in general.

I'll Watch Depending On Reviews

Affair: let's go rich/poor GL!

Pit Babe S2: please no mpreg, I can't do pregnancy storylines at allll

I'm The Most Beautiful Count: looks hilarious and I like the time travel concept, but I've never been keen on shows with many suitors (even love triangles can get too much for me), so I'll see how it goes.

Hmm

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans: idk, maybe I'll watch it if it receives lots of praise

Trailer-by-trailer thoughts below the cut.

Title: This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans

youtube

Pair: Sailub/Pon

Thoughts: It was released like a month ago but I didn't feel the desire to watch the trailer then and now that I've tried watching the trailer... idk, I don't really care. I was quite into Jeff/Alan in Pit Babe before souring on them in the later episodes and maybe that's bleeding into this. I skipped some of the scenes after the 2 minute mark, long ass trailer. I'll watch it if people Love it.

Title: Affair

youtube

Pair: idk but it's a GL :)

Thoughts: Girl, a 7 minute trailer?! I watched like 3 minutes. I'm into it, it's a boss's daughter/maid's daughter forbidden romance across class status. The leads are cute together. I'll add it to the watchlist and hope it's good

Aside: It's from a novel by Chao Planoy, who's also the author of GAP, Blank, Pluto, Us, My Marvellous Dream Is You, and more. People on twitter hate this author so bad, talking about how her books are really problematic and they're always glad when the plot is changed in the show but I also never quite know why they call her problematic, like okay Blank has a big age gap but I'm interested in the show because of said age gap so... lol I guess. Anyway, hope the shows are good, idc about the novels necessarily because many BL novels are also bad or 80% smut or with 0 plot or whatever.

Title: I’m The Most Beautiful Count

youtube

Pair: Suppanut harem haha but endgame Ping/Nut?

Thoughts: Nut had a real-life boyfriend for like 7 years, right? Love to see out actors being employed. Oh, a kathoey character.

This is so fun lol Long ass trailer again but I watched most of it cuz too much was going on. I'm not fully sure I'll watch it but it's interesting for sure, mostly for the main character + time travel concept. I don't really care for shows with many different people fighting for the affections of one person. Although people are excited about harem possibilities, I don't know I think it'll end with Ping/Nut rather than harem endgame.

Title: Pit Babe The Series 2

youtube

Pair: Pooh/Pavel

Thoughts: I didn't know a season 2 was on the table but I saw an interview with the crew that apparently they just thought of different scenarios over lunch one time for fun and that's how it was born lol. Starting the trailer with the minor bad guys from season 1 in prison and fighting is objectively hilarious. Kenta I fucking love you, I'm sad we won't get Pete/Kenta. Not the Mama/Papa again, please no mpreg plsplsplspls no T.T I don't know if I like that people who were killed in the first season are back again hmm. Again, long trailer so skipped a lot in the second half but watched enough to get the gist + no mpreg in the trailer at least lol. I'd be curious to watch it since I've already watched season 1 but I'll first listen to reviews saying whether it's actually good

Title: Goddess bless you from death

youtube

Pair: Pooh/Pavel (or is it Pavel/Pooh in this one? Update: based on some tiktok comments, it's still PoohPavel based on the novel hah fun either way), side couple Michael/TopTen (North/Sonic in Pit Babe)

Thoughts: Watching this one last even though it was released 2nd-last because from the title and poster and people's comments about it being dark, I think this could be my favourite of the trailers. and omg I was correct, it's suchhhhh a good pilot trailer, what the heck?! It's dark and actually gory and scary, I'm sooo excited, it's now one of my most-anticipated BLs.

Also, I'd previously seen this post on r/ThaiBL about the author of this novel wanting Pooh/Pavel to do liveaction for this ghosthunting BL, I'm glad that came to fruition haha

#general bl #to watch #change2561 2024

0 notes

smireyac · 4 months

Text

hey hey hey it's that time of year again 🎇

oh look an emoji in the title... nature is healing

so it's 9:30... 2023's been... alright, ig? like it feels like things are finally getting back to "normal", whatever that looks like right now... i stopped wearing a mask this year, long after most people ik already did (though considering SOMEONE in this house has covid right now, maybe it's time to buy more kn95s...) and i didn't feel debilitating anxiety being in a crowded indoor space so that means something, right?

once again, these last couple months haven't been so great, personally or globally, and with 2024 being an election year, the state of things feels... uncertain to say the least...

but we're here to look back, not forward (not yet anyway)! SO according to my goal list last year, did i accomplish much?

read 12 books? ✅ i read 20 actually! and not one of them was a graphic novel! ok i lied, ONE of them was a graphic novel but the rest were novel-novels! sure most of them were romance novels but that doesn't take away from the fact that i surpassed my initial goal so!! hooray 4 me 😁

write more? ✅ well, not more than last year but i think keeping up with writing anything still counts !! and i published another fic so!! hooray 4 me 😁

apply to transfer to university? ✅ hell yeah i did !!! and because I'm poor i got 4 free apps to UC and CSU schools!! i applied to UCSD, UCI, UCLA, UCSB, SDSU, CSUSM, and CSULB! i'll get responses back in mid-march/april... i don't wanna get my hopes up for anything... but i am excited to go to actual university, even if it won't be like my peers/the movies... yk bc im a transfer and i'll be 26 by the time i'm actually attending classes instead of a bright-eyed 18 year old, ready to take on the world... we'll see... i'll make this my extremely goofy movie moment if i have to lmao so!! hooray 4 me 😁

do stuff with friends? ✅ while i didn't do all the things i mentioned, most significant things i did this year were with friends!! i went to NYC with remi, and went back to little tokyo with annie and gnat so!! hooray 4 me 😁

make new friends? ✅ i did!! make at least one new friend 😊😊😊 and im very glad for it so!! hooray 4 me 😁

all major goals accomplished!!! ✅✅✅✅✅

hooray 4 me!!! 😁😁😁😁

also of the movies i mentioned that i was excited for, the only one i still haven't seen is the transformers movie lmao 😆 i will eventually

speaking of movies,,, i want to be more into movies this year 🤔 like i watched a number of awards season contenders this year and i kinda wanna be able to make my own oscar predictions this year? I'm also toying with the idea of defending my "movies of all time" list on letterboxd 🤔 (i say toying bc i literally just came up with the idea yesterday lmao) im putting this in writing bc if i don't then it makes it easier for me to not follow through on them, yk? also i have no idea what that "secret writing project" i talked about last time even was lmao

this is all related to my latest existential crisis re: what i wanna do with my life lmaoooo (when aren't i tho frfr) like going to university is the next big step in my life right? and when i tell people that i'm getting an English degree (tho i should rlly start saying literature now) the first thing they all ask is "oh do you want to be a teacher?" which is a HUGE pet peeve of mine because no!! i don't wanna be a teacher!!! that's not the only reason someone would get an English degree!! not that there's anything wrong with teaching, i just don't feel like i... have the right temperament? (tho if i'm being honest, i do have a fantasy of taking over as the film strand teacher when pike retires [but i think that's happening this coming year so that fantasy will remain a fantasy lol]) most recently, i've started saying i want to be an editor but even that feels like a commitment to something idek if I'll be able to achieve (am i commitmentphobic? more at 11) so like !! then what ??? i could try to go further up in the library ? go for a leadership position ??? its stable it has health insurance and a pension... smart things to keep, things i shouldn't disregard frfr i could have a CAREER with the library... but at the same time, i'm like... do i wanna get stuck here? like me and brenden were talking once about how long some of the people working at the library has been there and how most of them are tired and burnt out and

like what if i want to do something else?

my initial plan was to stick with the city for 10 years so i could qualify for the pension and they i might be able to do smthg else with my life while having that pension for later on and who knows? maybe i'd feel like coming back to library when i'm older and wiser??? since i've been here 5 years i thought i just needed 5 more TURNS OUT the 10 years only counts when you became BENEFITED and it only COUNTS YOUR WORKING TIME so even tho i've been here 5 years, im only like 8 months into this pension bullshit bc i got benefits a year and a halfish ago and IM ONLY HALF TIME!!!!!!

[sigh]

so idk!! shit's weird and idk what im doing!! i'm gonna go to school for literature and see what happens while i'm there; i hope i won't have to quit my job but i also wonder what it would be like to go to school full-time, like god intended... i've also considered master's and doctorates but like i feel like i shouldn't worry about that until i at least get through the bachelor's lmao 😆

i could go on (and i might tmrw tbh) but it's also 2am and i haven't even gotten to my goals this year

SO GOALS:

🎇 so first things first: we're keeping up the reading goal! we'll raise the stakes to 20 books since i know i can do that now

🎇 other goal related to reading: i want to read some non-fiction books this year; specific items include kitchen confidential, what we don't talk about when we talk about fat, and any/all of the miami history books i've checked out from the library b4

🎇 ik that my life will get very busy when i get to university so I'm hesitant to have a lot of stuff "to do" but i thought about trying to learn a new skill, specifically blender? bc im obsessed with bigtop burger lmao bc idk i still love animation and it just sounds fun!!

🎇 watch more movies? to do the awards szn thing? like im gonna try for the golden globes in fIVE DAYS? SHIT... well if not the globes then the oscars for sure but man... here's a secret career dream hidden in a goal: film critic? i think that's cool but like what does that even mean for me lmao ANYWAY WATCH MOVIES

i just wanna see where life takes me this year

maybe i'll figure some shit out along the way lol

happy new year babes 💖🍾🥂🎆

EDIT: I HAVE MORE GOALS I MIGHT WANT TO SET

🎇 make a content ? oooo scary ik we hate the word content but i feel like im finally confident enough in myself that i don't feel the excuse "im not good enough" is valid anymore? And sien has been asking to for forever and i think i was supposed to help her do it for her birthday ?? So ive been LACKING lmao

🎇 DM a DnD sesh frfr you've been wanting to for years but u always chicken out bc ur scared well ur reblog all those posts do it scared right? DO IT

🎇 go out to events ? like the poetry reading u were invited to and like u see those posts on insta so like maybe go to them? andMAYBEtrythatspeeddatingtypething???MAYBE.....

#omg i talk #happy new year

0 notes

aspiringtrashpanda · 1 year

Note

(continued 2.5 as something went wrong.) I did it because human hubris is a bit more interesting than "the world was destroyed because the original timeline was erased in favor of the mega evolution timeline woe is me" (although that may happen too, we'll see in what manner and what can be done about it, have tentative ideas, and that itself has a convoluted science-y/ physics explanation) and gives a good incentive for Leaf to go "what in Giratina's fresh hell do you think you're doing???" @/anyone copying her mistakes as is often in the anime and her Weirdness towards the insane number of people casually buddy-buddy with Legendaries + Ash's entire existence + obsession that nobody disturbs them/the fabric of space-time. (And naturally, projecting my own "I can't believe they killed Steven in the manga" *screaming cat noises.*) I’m saying all this in the event I say “f it” and post anyways, and you see it in the very empty Steven tag and think “whose this weirdo” 😭 National PSA to all Steven stans: I love the rock man and think he makes for an awesome big brother that shares the same excitement any kid would which makes it easier for him to connect with their level of energy and fascination and would be your biggest support and let you do whatever you wanted including a helicopter ride paid with his own money and take you on cool spelunking trips to show how fun geology can be even if it gives Lance heart palpitations at the dangers.

("Where have you been the last four days?!?!" "In a cave." "A CAVE?!?!" "Steven was there too. And I've been in caves before, that's the only way to get to Cerulean." "Mt Moon is an easy cave. It's for local use. Which cave were you in." "Steven was there!" "Steven goes to the worst caves of them all. For months at a time! That does not make me feel better." "...Well, we were supposed to look for Mega Stones in Glittering Cave, it was supposed to be quick, but Steven found some other cool rocks I don't know much about... oh, and when we left Ash sent me a photo of what I'm pretty sure might be a Legendary, so Steven wanted to check out that cave too-" *Lance gets up to take his stress medications*) This doesn't actually happen, I made up an example on the spot but similar vibes lol. But I was today years old when I discovered there's a "Kalos Stone" from this cave in the ORAS games in Rustboro Gym. Maybe Steven got a souvenir for Roxanne.

LOL WE DON'T TALK ABOUT HOW THEY KILLED STEVEN IN THE MANGA *sobs in a corner* And the Steven tag would be HAPPY to have such a brilliant fic idea. I don't think the idea of Steven as a big brother figure would be weird at ALL. I think a lot of people would appreciate seeing that side of him. omg poor Lance though. He probably has the highest blood pressure. It would be SO funny though.

#aspiringtrashpanda #please talk to me about your fics

1 note · View note

morganee · 1 year

Note

hi :) how are you?

Thank you so much for your reply. Makes me so happy you taking time to reply my dumb questions. About the Karen's second chapter? I'm so excited!!! But no pressure, do it only if you feel it. I am very well with your answer.

I wanted to do this before, but my week was crazy as hell. Anyway I read the fic that you post yesterday, and the last one about Mike playing Romeo? I do not know many words in english to tell you how much I enjoy every fic you post, u know? That's made me very very anxious because I wanna express it. But I hope you have an idea how I feel with this messages lol

Now under the limelight? I read it at the second you posted but I think could be kinda creepy if I come here too soon only for being a proper fan of your work (also yes, this week was pretty busy to me too, that was an 70/30 of the reasons why I didn't write this before). All the plot about Will a little bit jealous... I love it because I love that trope so much. Jealous plus trying so hard be happy for the love of your life? It's everything, love it love it love it.

so, *drums please*

uncle will? uncle mike? I didn't know how much I wanted until you give me that. Was fluffy, gorgeous (very quickly to read, sadly) and make me laugh in the right places because I think your obsession with cups is so cute. How much you have? I don't have any collection 🥺 I'm a boring person.

hope u have a wonderful week 🥰

-your hearstopper anon 😌

HIIII! It's so good to hear from you again :') and your questions are not dumb!! Please, keep asking me things <3 or even just tell me things if you want to, I'm here for whatever you want to talk about :D

I just started outlining the chapter for Karen's talk 👀 I woke up with the idea in my mind and thought "well, I guess I could start it!". Again, I can't promise you it will be up shortly but hopefully it won't take me too long. I don't think it's going to be a long chapter but then again, when I tried to write a 2k one shot it turned into a 9k one shot so yeah, we'll see 😂

And don't worry about writing to me just now (also, sorry it took me two days to answer!). I'm so happy you liked my other fics too!! And if you want to, you can tell me in your own language and then I'll google-translate it 😂 I know how hard it is to express yourself in another language! But I think I understand how you feel <3

Nooo I wouldn't think you're a creep!! You can come here whenever you want, it's totally okay, I promise you! But only when you have time, I know life can be busy ahah Jealous Will was fun to write and I have to say I don't often read about it? Like I usually look for fics where Mike is jealous but now that I think about it, I don't think I've read that many fics with a jealous Will! I can keep this in mind for my future fics 👀

asdfghjkl I'm so glad you liked my uncle Will/Mike fic! It was quick to read??? And here I thought it was again too long lol I will stop asking myself if 9k fics are too long. You are definitely not a boring person! Each one of us has its own thing and I just happen to collect mugs lol I'm sure you have other very interesting traits that I don't have! And to answer your question, I have probably something like 16 mugs and that's still too few for me! I still live with my parents and they just can't deal with me anymore lol I had to tell my friends to stop gifting me mugs because our cupboard is full ahah but one day, when I'll move out, I will have two cupboards at least just for mugs! Yeah, I'm that obsessed but I just like to take mugs from places I visit :')

Well, this was long, sorry! But I love to talk with you so much, so thank you for this ask!

Hope you're having a fantastic weekend!!! Sending you lots of love 💛

#my heartstopper anon #<3333 #love you lots #ask

1 note · View note

whiskeyandwolfsbane · 2 years

Text

7/28 - 9:42PM - The Night Before Surgery

So everyone probably knows by now that I'm getting surgery tomorrow. That's why this blog exists now, lol; I've had a few people ask for updates periodically and I thought, you know, I struggle to message more than two people back a day as it is, maybe I'd better find a place where I can just put it all at once.

All I could think of was a blog so here we are.

I'm supposed to be up at 4:30AM so I really should be sleeping but I still have stuff to do and anyway, I'll be sleeping like the dead for a solid four to five hours tomorrow anyhow so like... eh.

How am I feeling? Excited, sure, but mostly I'm just nervous and anxious. It's not a surprise, I stress out about everything ever, the joys of having generalised anxiety disorder. Will the results turn out okay? Will the surgery itself go okay? Will I get there on time? What if I screw something up? What if I forget something I'm supposed to bring tomorrow? And on.

I'm trying to just remind myself that what happens, happens. I've done everything I'm able to do so what good is it to just sit here freaking out? None.

Anyway. Here's the gist of what's going on tomorrow, I guess:

I have to check in by 6AM, so I'm waking up at 4:30AM so that I have enough time to shower and everything. Hopefully, departure time will be about 5AM. (Many thanks to my friend Lucy who is visiting, and also being my chauffeur for this venture.)

We have to go to Bellevue, which is why the departure is so early; it's a 40 minute drive usually, and according to my mother, that timeframe has traffic typically because of everyone heading off to work so.

Then, it's likely I'll be sitting around in the pre-op room for hours before actual surgery. The surgery itself takes roughly four hours according to the care team, and then whatever time it takes for wake-up, recovery, etc. I'm roughly guesstimating that I'll be there for around eight hours total.

I wanted to get a video of myself when I wake up because according to multiple friends who asked me to, folks say weird shit when they wake up from anaesthesia. Unfortunately, thanks to Covid, I'm not allowed to have anyone in the pre- or post-op rooms except the medical team. I'm pretty bummed about it, but cest la vie, I guess.

I'm gonna write "PHONE" on my hand in big letters if permissible so that it hopefully reminds me to record myself on my personal phone, which the nurse said I am allowed to do but we'll see.

But yeah. I'm currently trying to gather a stockpile of songs and podcasts on Spotify (why won't Spotify give me more organisation power), shows on Netflix (same with Netflix) and other TV streaming sites, and games I can play on my phone to keep me occupied both in the hours before surgery and after while I'm at home recovering. Suggestions are always welcome.

So are any other words of wisdom or encouragement or whatever - I'm probably going to be even more nervous come the morning and I may very well be asking people to talk me up then anyway lol.

And keep an eye out here for updates, I guess! All the talk about anxiety aside, I am also still pretty excited.

#journal entry #surgery blog #surgery journal

1 note · View note

iclaimedtobethebetterbard · 2 years

Note

Before the beginning for the writing meme!!

ooooh tyvm!!!

BEFORE THE BEGINNING — three sentences (or more) about something that happened before the plot of my current project

continuing the lovely trend of "i have too many wips so we're doing all 3 of the most active ones for these prompts":

the brand new Baby Janus Angst Story:

yes, i could have summarized this, but it was more fun to write it out as a tiny scene with no context to explain what's happening. (actually i will give one very small drop of context, which is to say to refer to the 2 opening lines i posted for this story here.)

"Logan, I'm boooooored," Patton begged. "Please come play? You've been over there forever!"

"I am investigating," Logan repeated stubbornly, hooking the wooden hammer from Thomas's toy tool set around the knob of the faintly-glowing door and tugging. "I need to figure it out."

"But it's still the same as it's been all week," Patton protested. "You already know everything about it so far! We can't open it. It's boring. Playing without you is boring. Come ooooon! Pleeeeease!"

"It is not either the same." Logan pointed firmly at the door. "It has an apple on it today. And the light is a different color, it's yellow now. I need to investigate."

Patton heaved a sigh and plopped to the floor, staring down the hall and watching Logan continue his mysterious experiments. He had Thomas's toy science kit out now. The kit was great for playing potions. But Patton knew better than to suggest they play potions while Logan was focused like this.

Patton dug in the pocket of his hoodie until he found one of the cookies he'd stashed there this morning, only slightly crumbly, and began nibbling at it morosely. He hoped that whatever was happening with the door would finish soon. He was just as curious as Logan, and a lot more excited about the idea of maybe a new friend like he thought was probably inside, it was true. But waiting was maybe his least favorite thing in the whole world. After being lonely when Logan left him alone and wouldn't play.

if you're going my way, i'll go with you chapter 7:

see. see i could have chosen to be nice and write a few sentences of analogical fluff about them waking up in each other's arms the morning after rescuing roman. bc that happens between chapters 5 and 6. however, i am far too invested in hurting both the characters and my readers. so instead of analogical fluff, you get a few sentences that will be the conclusion to a flashback chapter we'll get eventually (when i feel like making people cry). it technically does take place before the beginning of chapter 7 bc it takes place way before (like over 5 years before) the beginning of the entire fic. enjoy >:D

He let the car door fall shut and watched, almost numb, as it drove away. It turned a corner and vanished from sight.

Remus’s legs gave out from under him and he collapsed to sit on the edge of the sidewalk, pulling his knees to his chest and shaking all over, staring into the distance with unfocused eyes, breath ragged and harsh and loud.

It was not quite eight o'clock on the morning of his eighteenth birthday, and Remus Kingsley was all alone.

one chance to change your fate chapter 10:

here, have a little snippet from a piece that uh. i probably cannot publish/nobody will read it if i do. bc it is the story of janus and patton's dads slowly falling in love years and years before the fic starts. so they are the main characters. and they are ocs. janus and patton are technically there but also they are children. so. it barely even counts as a fanfiction at this point, it's just straight up an original piece in the same au as the fanfiction. bc i am way too attached to the dads and have fleshed out basically their entire life stories. oops lol.

but anyway this is from the scene where janus calls arun pop instead of patton's pop for the first time :) which happened before the dads actually got together, bc they were really really close for a long time beforehand :D and it's really cute and soft and good!!

(side note of great importance, there is another equally cute scene of the first time patton called philippe dad instead of janus's dad, also before the dads actually got together, also bc of how very close they all were even before the dads got together. philippe cried, it was adorable.)

Janus’s eyes widened. “I did it?”

Arun chucked them under the chin. “You sure did.”

“Dad!” The nine-year-old all but launched from the couch, darting across the room to the kitchen. “Dad, come see—c’mon—” They grabbed Philippe by the sleeve and tugged him over to the coffee table. “Look what Pop showed me how to do!” They seized the page of math problems and held it up triumphantly. “Didn’t I—”

Arun saw the exact instant that Janus realized they’d said “Pop.” The child froze, shoulders tensing and eyes going huge, the snake pupil in their left eye narrowing to a razor-thin slit of panic and the human side of their face going pale.

Philippe half-reached for his child, but Arun was quicker. He leaned over and ruffled Janus’s hair. “You did it exactly right, kiddo,” he said, striving to keep his tone as casual and warm as could be, to convey safe and okay and good without openly acknowledging what had just occurred and making it a bigger deal out of it to the already-tense child before him. Janus hated for attention to be brought to their mistakes, and while this was in Arun’s opinion possibly the farthest thing from a mistake Janus had ever done, he still wanted to be mindful of his reaction for the sake of the child's comfort.

[ask me about my writing projects!]

#peregrin answers #peregrin plays a game #peregrin said a thing #star tag!!!!#im making you a tag :)#if u want it to be different then lmk!!

7 notes · View notes

luvlyrv · 3 years

Text

Our Songs | pt. 6 | Wendy x F!Reader SM!AU

Word Count: 2.7k

A/N: I hope the word count marginally makes up for the fact this series has been on a three month hiatus lol, don't worry though it'll finish soon!

Date: 6/10/21

Series Masterlist

Ever since you and Wendy exchanged numbers you find your hand unconsciously reaching out to your phone throughout the day. You hope to find a notification from her when you turn it on. Thankfully she always seemed to respond back, but even when she didn't you'd put your phone down to repeat the loop. You tried your best to make sure it didn't interfere with your work, but still, your day was marked by Wendy. Although she wasn't there physically your conversations always carried through day and night.

You've known her to be a warm person, always friendly and comforting. You hope you're not reading into things too much, but sometimes you read her messages and your heart skips a beat. The way she would talk about you would make you flustered. It would force you to put your phone down for a second, unable to comprehend the positivity. Then the thought that maybe she was flirting would creep into your head.

The idea that you're just imagining things always comes back to fight it though.

Shaking your head you decide not to contemplate the idea further. After all she was going to come over soon and you needed to focus on finishing your songs. Thinking about any possible romantic feelings was the last thing you wanted to do. Especially with her in front of you.

Luckily the thoughts dissipate as you zone into the work in front of you, scrutinizing every detail you possibly could. You let yourself sink into the feeling of the songs, letting it help guide your decisions in mixing. As quickly as you get focused though, you're broken out of your zone when you hear knocking on the door. Before answering you run to the mirror and take a quick look while trying to make sure you look presentable. When you rush up to the door to open it you act like nothing happened.

"H-hello! Welcome again to my humble abode!" You say it with a smile, trying to suppress the sudden fluttering feeling in your stomach.

"Hey!" She says while looking up and down at you. "Looks like we're accidentally matching today, huh?" Wendy walks past the door and you close it behind her. You take a moment to look at her outfit and then at yours. The both of you had a very blue color palette.

"Well, way to steal the spotlight. You look way cuter than me." You don't sound as confident as you'd like, your voice bordering on the softer and quieter side. You realize you haven't felt this nervous in a while.

"As if that could ever be possible!" Wendy turns her head back at you as she walks towards your room. She rolls her eyes and sticks her tongue at you, only to quickly smile at your remark. "Now stop being silly and let's work."

You follow her into your bedroom and sit down in front of your computer. She sits on a familiar stool and the two of you immediately start working. You share what you have so far, all you do is record some more vocals, including harmonies and adlibs. You polish things with Wendy by your side to help make some stylistic choices. It took a few hours that only felt like mere minutes.

The sun is still out, unlike the first time the two of you had worked together. This leads you to ask Wendy something before she would leave.

"While we're here we should just record the collab video, yeah?" Wendy's eyes light up in recollection of your previous conversation.

"That sounds good, how about we do the Q&A type video today? I can just message Yeri for some questions."

"Sure, I'll ask Seulgi to make up some interesting things for us to answer too."

The two of you didn't have to wait long as both of your friends replied fast, excited to help out and excited to have some questions answered. You situate yourself next to Wendy in a comfortable position and get the camera ready. After getting the camera in position you take the time to fix the lighting in your room, making sure to have a soft and natural feeling with the lights.

Finally, the red light begins to blink on your camera and you wave. Wendy follows along and flashes the camera a friendly look. You give a quick introduction for the video.

"Hey everybody! I'm here with Wendy today to do a little Q&A type video for you guys! We've both gotten some questions from our friends and it's just to share a little about us, how we feel about our collaboration, behind the scenes type of stuff, you know?" Wendy tilts her head and looks at you as you talk, nodding to your words.

"I really can't wait to answer these questions with you." She says with a smile. She looks back at the camera as she pulls her phone out and looks at her messages with Yeri. "Neither of us have prepared any script or anything. We've barely even looked at the questions they've sent us!" You nudge Wendy with your elbow and laugh at a thought.

"What if they sent us something inappropriate?"

"Oh god, Yeri totally would." You both giggle before Wendy prompts you to start reading questions first.

"Alright we'll stop wasting our audience's precious time now. My dear Seulgi's first question is… "what were your first impressions?" Wendy doesn't hesitate to answer the question as soon as it was asked.

"Oh! Whenever Y/N entered the café we were meeting in I was kind of surprised! She doesn't post a lot of pics of herself so to see someone as talented as her in real life was an honor. She's really cute, right?" She reaches out to pinch the cheek of your so-called cute face. You strain a smile of embarrassment at her antics.

"Yeah yeah, I don't record myself a lot." When she stops her assault on your face you follow-up with your opinion. "For Wendy… I was also really surprised… I think I'm really lucky. You guys should know that a camera really doesn't do her justice! When I first met her she certainly gave off a very approachable demeanor too."

"Why do you think that?"

"I don't know? I was really nervous meeting you, yet when I saw you and when we got to talk the atmosphere turned into something really comfortable fast. Let's just move on to the next question." You take a look at your phone again to see Seulgi's question. "What's your favorite thing about the other? Well, Wendy has always been so sweet, it's been wonderful working with her. I appreciate the care and dedication to her work that she has shown me. Her musicality really helped pull everything together, and when I was stuck she was always there to give me a fresh perspective."

"Aww, that's so sweet of you." Wendy says with a blush on her face, her hand covering her face as she laughs a bit. "It's strange to be talking to you like this, I feel like. I think you're a really straightforward person but we haven't really talked about our opinions to this extent! Especially to a camera. Ah… well I think I could really say everything the same for Y/N." Wendy nods a bit in thought before continuing on. "To add to it though, I think Y/N has just always been so considerate to me. Like, beyond being a great musician she has been a good person to me. I think if you've seen some of our interactions on Twitter you'll know that she ended up cooking a wonderful meal for me on our first meeting. I think that if she wasn't as nice as she is, we wouldn't have had this much fun together… wait, this has been fun for you too, right?"

"Oh my god, yes it has. How could you doubt that?" You punch her arm with a fake upset face. You turn back to the camera. "Guys, we've hung out and have talked soooo much outside of our collab. I literally don't understand how she can have a single doubt in her mind about us having fun."

"It doesn't hurt to clarify! Anyways, next question now! And stop punching so hard!"

"Oh hush, it wasn't that hard. Oh hmm, to go along with that Seulgi wonders what our least favorite thing about each other is."

"That's an easy one!" Wendy says all too excitedly. You make a shocked expression, worry flooding your system as Wendy points at you with a smile. "I hate how you're absolutely brimming with talent! Your work is impeccable! Musical genius!"

You groan as your body crumples. "You nearly gave me a heart attack…" Your voice is muffled between your knees.

"It's true though!" Wendy says in a sing-song voice, her face smug in satisfaction to see your scared reaction. "Otherwise there's nothing I can really say."

You gather the strength to get back up and face the camera, then Wendy. Your face is still filled with disappointment but you take your time to stare at Wendy. As you stare at her she seems to come undone as she nervously looks away.

"What are you doing?" A red color subtly creeps up her neck.

"I'm just thinking. I'm thinking that… You also have nothing wrong with you." Wendy can't help but to roll her eyes at your comment. "Except for being awfully cheesy. It makes me wanna go bury myself in a ditch so I won't have to hear your stupid cheesiness again."

"Whatever, whatever. It's my turn to read the questions. Now… this is a good one, "what has the work process been like?"

"Well that's obvious, I do all the work and Wendy leeches off of me like a parasite."

"Hey! Just because it's true doesn't mean you have to say it to the world!" Her response throws you into a fit of laughter, turning you into a mess.

"Oh my, no no! It's really not like that. I would say we have an equal workload, or a workload that makes sense between our respective positions." Wendy shakes her head in disagreement.

"I don't feel so. I feel like Y/N always does so much work, and she does it so quickly too. It makes me feel kind of bad when I sit beside her and see her work her magic. When she's focused and working so hard it's quite amazing."

"Ah geez." You shyly scratch the back of your neck. "Wendy's always like this, complimenting me. Like I said earlier though, she really helps bring me new perspective when I'm stuck and her musicality is like nothing else. She always takes the time to sit next to me and monitor things too. It's not like she's a third party to the process. Not only that," You take the time to send Wendy a smile in an attempt to reassure her that you're not burdened with work. You want her to know that you appreciate her part of the creative process, "but nothing really feels like hard work when I'm with you."

Wendy has a hard time processing your words, so instead of addressing it she decides to just further elaborate her answer to the question.

"Well, I'll just lay down the process for everyone. Obviously, Y/N produces and I sing. Although after enough convincing from me you'll hear her singing on the tracks as well, so say thank you! It all started when Y/N took the time to reach out to me, which I was really excited about by the way, and then we both agreed to meet up at a local place. We just talked about concepts and our availability. We both ended up writing songs and worked together on what we wanted to keep or change. Everything productive happens here," Wendy opens her arms to gesture to the area around her, "at Y/N's place. Even though I have audio equipment at my place too we just record things here."

"Yeah, everything she said is true. I have a little set-up here in my room. I don't think I've ever really shown you guys it? I mean, I've shown my guitar collection before but not all my other equipment yet. I'll film that another time though. Next question?"

"Oh this is kind of interesting to think about, "what do you think the reception of your mini-album will be?" The both of you take a moment to think about it. Recalling many of the things you've read on social media you decided to speak first.

"Well, I think it'll be extremely beneficial to the both of us in multiple ways. I mean first off, I guess by our genre of music we have a lot of overlap between fans. There's been an overwhelming amount of support from fans who are excited to see the both of us collaborate and interact. I have no doubt that it'll do well since it's so highly anticipated by our fans. It'll be even better if you guys manage to stream and share it!" Throughout your explanation you begin to give Wendy shy glances. "I think that even if we drop our music and it doesn't meet much success, I would've gained a lot. I think working together with Wendy has helped me grow as a musician and anything that I learn here I will utilize in the future."

At your last comment Wendy seemed to get excited and she quickly added on.

"Exactly! If anything the most important part about all of this is the fact that I have gained skills as a musician and gained a friend. That greatly outweighs any potential of success." Wendy has a bright smile on her face, happy to be able to call you a friend.

"That doesn't mean we don't want you guys to go ahead and share our music by the way." You joke light-heartedly. "It would mean a lot if you did."

"Now final question for this video! We've been talking too much." Wendy looks at her phone, unlike before she takes a couple seconds before reading the question aloud. "Uh, I think this should be fun to answer. "What do you want to do in the future together?" I think that obvious answer is to make more music!"

You chuckle at her answer before responding as well. "Going to each other's places to have a jam session doesn't sound bad, but hanging out in general is good. We'll definitely continue being friends, and if the reception for our collab is really good we might do another one? That is, of course, if Wendy is okay with that."

"I would be more than happy to do that. I was also thinking of forcing you to binge watch more shows and movies with me."

"Only if you stop hogging the popcorn. Anyways, I think this should be the end of our video. I highly encourage all of you to check-out Wendy's channel in a couple days. The day right before release we're going to be dropping one more video together! Bye-bye!" You wave a goodbye to the camera with a smile. Wendy joins you in your outro.

"See you guys soon!"

You go to turn your camera off as Wendy goes to gather her things. After turning off your lights you go to sit back down on your seat, importing the recently filmed footage to your computer. Wendy takes this moment to sit down next to you again.

"Again, thank you for your hard work!" She says it with a smile as she brings her hand on your arm. "I'm always amazed with the quality of your work and how quickly you can do it."

"No problem, I'll send the songs to you later for your feedback. We'll be able to post everything soon." You smile back at her and give her hand a comforting squeeze. A part of you wishes you could keep your hand there forever.

"Alright, well see you at my place soon!"

When you finally hear the click of your door closing you let out a sigh. You don't want to think about it. You don't want to face it.

You don't want to face the possibility that you've fallen.

#wendy x reader #son seungwan #rv x reader #red velvet imagines #red velvet scenarios #kpop au #kpop imagines #son seungwan x reader #rv wendy #girl group imaines #girl group scenarios #social media au #red velvet

23 notes · View notes